Paul Rabil, NBA Playoffs, The Boys Went To An Islanders Game & Fyre Fest Of The Week

Hey, Pardon My Take listeners, you can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music.
On today's Pardon My Take, we are talking to our good friend Paul Rabel, little PLL, Water Dogs. Always fun to have him in person, too.
In-person interviews are back. We are going to talk a little NBA playoffs.
We went to the Coliseum, so we give a review of the Coliseum. Big Cat, you're under.
We saved the Coliseum. We saved the Coliseum, the Collie.
It was an awesome night. Long Island is the best.
We are talking about Jay Williams and probably the worst tweets of all time. Fire Fest of the week, a great show.
Send you good vibes on this show going into the weekend and we're brought to you by our friends at there's making a sandwich and then there's crafting a sandwich and when i want something perfectly crafted i go straight to boar's head for over a century boar's head has been dedicated to crafting premium deli favorites every ingredient is carefully chosen every recipe made with a purpose their turkey, smoked master ham, and ever roast chicken are made from premium whole cuts, hand trimmed, and perfectly seasoned. Last weekend, I made the ultimate sandwich, oven gold turkey, cheese, pickles, and mustard.
Simple, but unbelievable. So next time you're at the deli, don't settle, get the best.
Boar's Head, committed to craft since 190505 discover the craftsmanship behind every bite at boarshead.com okay let's go now in the street there is violence and then a lot work to be done. No place to hang out or wash in, and then I can't lay all on the sun.
Oh, no. We're gonna rock down to Electric Avenue, and then we'll take it higher.
Oh, we're gonna rock down to Electric Avenue. It's Part of My Take presented by Barstool Sports.
Welcome to Part of My Take presented by BetterHelp.com. Go to BetterHelp.com slash PMT right now.
You get 10% off their first month at BetterHelp.com slash PMT. Today is Friday, June 25th, and it is no longer Suns in four.

Could be a gentleman's sweep, though.

But it also needs to be the playoff P game, the playoff P playoffs.

I'm going to give some credit.

We talked about this the other night.

I'm going to give some credit to playoff P.

He had an awesome night.

They needed to win this game.

Not a can't lose, but

a must win. 27-15-8.

Half court shot.

Set the tone.

The Clippers have life. The Clippers

officially have a little bit of life.

Reports of the Clippers' demise were greatly

over-exaggerated by us.

Is Chris Paul a cancer to the team? I think

Chris Paul was selfish

tonight, Big Cat, in that he rushed himself back too fast. Those are the two sides of the coin you have to play as an NBA analyst.
You either say, like, this guy's a wimp because he's not out there fighting for his guys, or he may have come back too fast. He did.
And he needed to wait. Chris Paul needed to wait a little bit longer, come back.
He was not the Chris Paul that we know, but, I mean, who knows? is he a long hauler uh yeah could be yeah we could I just I feel bad for the sons and four guy because you know deep down in his head I mean we know this for a fact because he came on our show and said I if I can't get tickets I just like to shoot around with the boys so we know how his mind works he was thinking deep down they're not going to lose again sons and

four sons and four sons and four yeah and then we win the title and i'm sons and four guy and i

basically make my entire existence like if the sons had gone sons and four sons and four sons and

four he would have been set for life oh he absolutely would he would not have had to buy a

drink in the scottsdale area ever again i think sons would have given him a job yeah just to sit

in the stands.

And just say something not to do anything.

Right.

Just like sit there

hold up four

Thank you. not have had to buy a drink in the Scottsdale area ever again in his life.
I think the Suns would have given him a job. Yeah, just to sit in the stands.
And just say Suns and Four. Not to do anything.
Just sit there, hold up four fingers. Every time a game entered the fourth quarter, he would be the guy that would just hold up four.
The arena would go nuts. That would be his life.
He'd probably get a gig doing Saturday radio on some Phoenix local sports station. He would have had a great time just milking that.
Now, if they do advance and they win the NBA championship in four games, if it's a clean sweep, at that point, I feel like it's still kind of back on for him. He kind of comes back.
This game also has an asterisk. And let's just throw it out there.
Campaign did get hurt. He only played four minutes.
That changes the whole series. Changes the flow.
This offense flows through campaign. Right.
You can confidently say there's no excuses left on the table. The Clippers are without their best guy Kawhi.
The Suns are without their best guy campaign. Although would you rather have campaign stick around and have a you can't make him the identity of your offense because then you lose the magic that is the campaign game that we already had.
Well, he's got many of them. That was the campaign game, though.
Right. Until the next one happens.
Which is coming up as soon as he gets healthy. But I'm just throwing an asterisk.
You know what? I think it's, you know, you have to. The story doesn't get told without starting with campaign did not play more than four minutes in this game.
The Suns also did the thing where they spread their scoring out almost evenly amongst their starters. The problem is they need to have like four more points per person.
And they need campaign. And campaign to show up.
If that happens, the Suns are tough to beat. Yeah.
All right, so it's a series, though. You know what? No.
We're a Suns podcast. The series doesn't start until the road team wins again.
That's true. That's true.
But it is nice that we won't have, because, you know, if the Suns had won tonight, and we are a Suns podcast, I would have said it would be pretty clear that it was going to be Suns at four. Now, I wouldn't hate it if Kawhi came and played just so that way, as long-time suffering Suns fans, no one can take this away from us and be like, well, Kawhi didn't play at this.
Right. I don't want, you know what I'm dreading? Like the Mickey Mouse repliers on Twitter, the ones who were like, this is a Mickey Mouse championship for your sons.
Yeah. Ratio.
Hold this ratio on your fraud championship. List of guys that got hurt in the 2021 playoffs.
Yeah. Sons didn't win a real title.
No, I want to. I'm blocking those people.
You know what? I want to take your best shot and still beat you as a Suns fan. We've been waiting a long, long time since at least the Nuggets series.
It's been a long time. Has Kawhi even been around? No, he was in the suite.
They showed him in the suite. Okay, cool.
Yeah, so he's there. He might have been dead.
No, he's there. Proof of life has been proven.
Okay, let's talk some Hawks, Bucs. Game one.
Trey Young. This is the Trey Young coming out party.
48 points. As was the last game.
I feel like he's had like six games this postseason where it's like, this is the emergence of Trey Young. Yes.
Turns out he's just really good. I have a question for you, Big Cat.
Yeah. What if the Hawks just won the championship? Dude, so i we're gonna talk about the islanders game in a second how weird would that be i dvr'd the game and i i actually think this might be my new move even though you know it's only a set circumstances of being at a game and missing another game but watching a game after the fact it's kind of fun i also beat magic johnson still i watched the game 10 a.m.
on Thursday morning, and I beat Magic Johnson by four hours. To what tweet? To him being like, just catching up on the Hawks-Bucks game one tweet.
So I beat him to it still. So I was still very much on it.
But I was thinking that exact thought. It could happen, maybe.
I don't really. So my biggest takeaway is Trae Young is in a zone right now where he's playing with so much confidence.
He did the shimmy in the middle of a fucking three-point shot, which, shout out Trae Young, because that's the most pressure you could ever have in a three-point shot is doing the shimmy before your shot. It's actually worse than trying a contested three-pointer.
I would like to see the stats on it. I bet you that he's more accurate, or most shooters are more accurate with a hand in their face, than they are doing a shimmy on a wide open.
I think he had the ball for like three seconds before he shot it. It was crazy.
It's nuts. And so he put all that pressure on himself, which just tells me he is ice cold.
Yeah, so he's playing with so much confidence that there's moments where he looks like he's not trying hard because it's like he's he's just so at ease right now you know what i mean like you know some of the passes they're just so at ease like he's playing a pickup game and it i had that's where i had that thought where i was like wait trey young has so much confidence he's playing in such a style that anything works for him. Even if he's at a bad shooting night, he's getting involved another way.
And we talked about this after the Game 7. Even if he's having a bad shooting night, he's going to keep shooting.
But yeah, the Hawks... And his rim protection is just off the charts.
I do think we shouldn't overreact to Game 1. Yeah, it's true.
Against Ben Simmons. We shouldn't overreact to Game 1 because I think the Bucs will still, you know, this is going to be a series.
It's going to be a long series and they could absolutely win this series. But it's the Trae Young.
I'm going to stop because I am going to overreact because I don't think that we've even come close to overreacting on Trae Young. I think the best that we've said about him is he's a great player, great shooter.
And when he beat the Knicks, we were like, he's an awesome villain. No, the best thing I said about him was that we now have to redraft the 2018 NBA draft.
Because that's the biggest... I'm Luka.
How could you pick Trey Young ahead of... Or how could you...
The trade that went down where the Hawks basically traded back and they're like, you take Luka, we'll take Trey Young. Right.
So I think that that's actually not, yeah, it's a discussion. So yeah, it's a discussion.
I'm going to overreact and say that for the first time I was able to picture mentally Trey Young winning a national championship. I was able to picture him NBA championship.
NBA, it's still that. I was going to say Oklahoma is never going to win a national championship.
International championship because we play against the Raptors too. They'll get blown out by fucking 40 in the Rose Bowl because they can't play defense.
Right, so I can picture Trey Young winning an NBA championship. He's a confetti guard now.
I can mentally see the confetti falling down on his weird hair. Oh my God, it would get stuck.
It would get stuck in such weird places in his hair. He also deed up Giannis on a possession.
Poor Pat Connaughton with the shot that basically could have won the Bucs the game, and he airballed it. And it was like, ooh.
There's a bit of that going around. A bit of that going around.
Actually, we should talk about that real quick. So KD, when he's on Twitter, he's on 10, champ.
There is no take it easy for him. So if you missed it, Scottie Pippen did an interview with GQ which, listen, I love Scottie Pippen.
He's an all-time all-time player. But Scottie Pippen does have enough things in his resume that him criticizing KD being like, you tried to win it all yourself you had to know if you're Scottie Pippen, you're going to get clapped back and it's going to be things that you don't want to talk about.
The migraine, the sitting out the last play, not rehabbing over the summer. Those things are going to have to come up if you're going to criticize a guy like Kevin Durant who does not, if you criticize him, he will come back at you.
Getting cocked by Future of the Rapper. Oh, what happened? Oh, with Larsa? Russell Wilson? Yeah, Larsa.
No, Larsa. That's just on the resume.
Oh, okay. Oh, yeah, yeah.
That was a wild day on the old internet. I think there's a...
Someone needs to make... Billy, this actually would be a good one for you.
Make up a formula, a math formula, because it's time since you last played. Like, if you have played 20 years ago, I think that the current players are like, shut up.
If you've played 40 years ago, it's like, respect that legend. I can't believe he's still alive.
Right. So it's like Charles Barkley gets clowned on all the time because he has opinions.
And then they're like, dude, you didn't win anything. You didn't play defense in these big moments.
You know what I mean? I'll tell you exactly when it is. It was like that old bad boys Pistons team.
When they won their last championship, that's the last of the respectable older guys. Everything after that is still like, stay in your lane, know your role, let the next generation.
Unless you're Jordan. Unless you're Jordan, because he'll take that personally.
And by the way, Scottie Pippen, I actually kind of get it. I get why Scottie Pippen is just ready to lash out at everybody, because every place that Kevin Durant has ever played for, the question has always been, like, is he the Jordan or is he the Pippen of this team? So Scottie's been, like, following him around on every team he's ever been on, just getting clowned by people.
Like, calling KD Scottie Pippen on any team they've been on has been, like,

a tremendous insult to him. Which is crazy because Scottie Pippen's the top 25 player of all time.

And Scottie Pippen also made some decent points, not about KD.

Like, he made a decent point about Steve Kerr.

Yeah.

I mean, Steve Nash.

He made a decent point about him.

He basically was like, look, you played him a ton of minutes.

You should have had him in the post

trying to rest a little bit while he's out there.

Like, he was clearly...

Kevin Durant was incredible in that series.

But you can't tell me that he wasn't at least

a little gassed in the overtime

because he was basically carrying the entire

team on his back. I'm just still going through my

head right now because it feels like

Scottie Pippen is not clearly a top 25 NBA player of all time. I'm doing names.
Are you willing to stand by that take? I don't think either of us knows enough NBA history. Here's what I'm going off of.
I had a poster when I was a kid. Top 50 players of all time.
That was top 50 NBA players, and that was in 2003, and Scottie Pippen was controversially on the list. Oh, I think he was securely on it.
Top 50 at the time. Now, top 25.
All right, so top 30? Yeah, maybe top 30. Yeah.
All right, I just pulled up the first one I could find. That's fine.
Literally the first one I could find. This is what we're going off of.
He's number 25. Okay, all right.
The first article I found. Hey, listen, when you've been proven wrong, statistically, you've been proven wrong.
It was good that we had the debate, though, wasn't it? Yeah, I think he's comfortably in top 35 and then top 25. He's bubbled top 25.
I just pulled up another one, 24. Oh, okay.
So there you go. He was like one of the last few in.
Yeah. Yeah, I mean, he will be surpassed by the Kevin Durants and the Steph Currys.
But no, you can't count them because they're still playing. Oh, I didn't know that was part of the list.
No, no, no. Just in case Kevin Durant ends up driving a school bus full of children off a cliff, we can take him.
He's not going to be on the list yet until his chapter is fully written. That's so funny that people have two lists, and he's 24 and 25, because that seems about right.
All right. This is the best sports podcast in the world.
What do you got? Yeah, we have that deep in our brains. We're like, we know this list.
What are you going to say? Have you guys heard of the Bracket Matrix? No, that sounds intense, though. It's a website, and it's a compilation of every bracketology for college basketball, and they take the average seed, and then from there, they make a bracket.
A giant bracket? Of the average bracket. They need that for the top 25 players of all time.
How many times have you jerked off to that? Zero, but I check it every single day. Wait, now I'm curious about the bracket, man.
Who's the number one overall seed? Is overall seed is it well it's only in season no like it's for each seat it's like a live i thought it was like college basketball over the course of time yeah here's la probably number one actually here's one that has him at 29 but he also has jason kidd higher than him which i feel like that's got to be wrong that's tough and it also has current players which shouldn't count. When I was saying top 25, I wasn't counting current players.
You weren't? I was. No, I was not.
Because I was thinking how many current players are still above him at this point in their career. There's probably five that would be above him.
Yeah, I mean, I don't unless I count LeBron, but everyone else, you've got to wait until you see the... You count LeBron? Yeah, in the top 25.
I don't know if I would count LeBron. Yeah, I think he's probably in the top 25.
You haven't even seen Space Jam, too. He's in the top 25.
I'm going to give him... You know what? Write that down.
Can you shut the fridge again? Write that down. Big Cat said something nice about LeBron.
He is a top 25 NBA player of all time. That was huge of me.
That was very big of you. Either way, Scottie Pippen...
We need to figure out this fridge. This is his fridge.
It sounds like we're in the middle of Die Hard. It's like a bomb going off if I can't fill a jug with my piss.
I'm just going to unplug some random shit here. Yeah, it turned off.
We're good. Oh, he just unplugged it.
Billy said he doesn't think it's the fridge. Our microphones.
What would it be then, Billy? Talking to Mike, Billy. Our microphones are off.
You don't think it's the fridge okay we're back wait hank hank and billy do part of my take our microphones are off if it's not the fridge what could it be william something else that's even all right welcome back counter my day that was actually a pretty decent debate right there boys sound off in the comments which side you land on. Is it the fridge or is it something else? Yeah, you never know.
Right, right. Either way, Scottie Pippen, the only fault Scottie Pippen really had in this entire commentary is going after Kevin Durant.
Because that's the one guy who will always come back. And this is the worst week to go after Kevin Durant because he's coming off of an all-time performance.
And he doesn't have a job to go to right now. So he's just online every day.
I bet you Kevin Durant has numerous Google searches set up for his own name. If there's an article that comes out that mentions KD, the servant, Durant, the Durantula.
He's got all those set up. So they hit his inbox, and he responds pronto on Twitter.
And honestly, I think he still probably does have a couple burner accounts that he breaks out for the real steamy stuff. But I feel like he's kind of consolidated most of his takes to his main handle.
I would say probably like 70% of what he's firing off online is coming from his name. He's putting his name on it and the rest i just want to find what his what his current burner accounts are now because that's where you're going to get the real shit from him he's given he's given the hot takes um okay let's move on we're going to uh before we do that ever had one of those days when it's just too cold to keep working nah neither has ariat ariat work jackets and boots are packed with all the cold stopping waterproof

protection you need to get the job done under any conditions so you can take any job out there and always deliver. Check out Ariat in your local workwear retailer or visit Ariat.com slash work to get 10% off your first order when you sign up for email and weather whatever in Ariat work gear.
Okay, let's talk some hockey.

Well, unfortunately, the Golden Knights and Canadiens are playing... and weather whatever in Ariat Work Gear.
Okay, let's talk some hockey.

Well, unfortunately, the Golden Knights and Canadians are playing in overtime right now.

We will update that as it goes on.

Oh, wait, yeah.

Gucci overtime challenge.

Fleury, I'll do Carey Price.

I'll go Reeves again.

Okay.

Actually, no, I'll do my guy Cole Caulfield from Wisconsin.

So, there we go.

What team is he on?

He's on the Canadians. Oh, ha-ha.
So, that's what they're calling him. So, that's what they're calling him.
They're calling him. We were saying.
What is it, Cole Caulfield from Wisconsin. So, there we go.
What team is he on? He's on the Canadiens. So, that's the Cones.
What are the Cole Caulfield? Nice. Like, Canadians? America's team? Buy a t-shirt.
Yeah, they might be. I think they might be, yeah.
Well, unless the Islanders can finish game seven. Islanders are America's team.
Yeah. So, we went to the Collie.
We saved the Collie. Some people are saying that.
Not everyone. Oh, the Collie was going to shut down.
It would have been dead had we not brought the juice last night. We brought the juice.
It was a hell of a time. It was a hell of an experience.
So a few things that I noted. The facility is a dump, but it's what? It is.
You think people would be mad about that? No, I think they will readily admit that. Even Islanders fans, you know that everything that happens during the game at the Collie is amazing.
The barn is rocking. It's the best venue in hockey to just sit and watch a game at while the puck is in play.
Everything beside that, they should light a match and then walk out the door and never turn back. Correct.
The venue is a dump. The experience is incredible.
It was so awesome. It was so loud.
Everyone was so locked into the game. There was a moment in between the second and third period where I turned to PFT and Hank, and I was like, I think I love Long Island because we are beloved on Long Island.
It was the highest approval rating I think the three of us have ever had inside of a building. We had little kids, old men, everyone in between.
We're not counting the hospitals that we visited that we haven't talked about on this show. Correct, correct.
Everyone in between asking for pictures, saying what's up. It was awesome.
It felt really cool. So shout out, Islander Nation.
We love you. Shout out to the kid that gave me a note with a whole presentation.
He gave me a note with a flash drive attached, and I thought it was going to be a resume asking to be an intern. It was just an application for us to go record at his house, and it was like, I hear you guys talk about recording at houses and stuff.
I don't think he realized that we have a studio. Wait, wait, wait.
Did you put the thing in? Did you plug that flash drive in? That's definitely malware. No, I didn malware.
You are spying on us. He was a Russian.
You are fucked. I didn't plug it in.
We disavow whatever is on Hank's computer right now. I haven't plugged it in.
Okay. Don't plug it in.
Plug it into Billy's computer when he gets his new one. I will probably plug it in.
I saw somebody hand Hank a folded up piece of paper, and Hank unrolls it, looks in, and calmly puts it in his pocket. I would have sworn it was drugs.
I would have sworn that Hank was just being very coy about it. Well, he was watching me.
I wasn't just going to like throw it away. He tried to hand it to me first and I was like, no, thank you.
Like, I don't just take random things. The point of the message is that I thought it was funny because he was like, come record at my studio thinking that's because that's when we're on the road where like sometimes we need places to record.
It's like, we're not going to go island i don't know we have a studio in new york dude if the islanders win game seven we might go to this kid's house all right i almost just said it but i'm not going to say i almost like said we will go there now we might we'll think no we'll think about it because i love we might have to do stuff with paul because paul bisendell will probably be back here probably with a very stringent streaming yes schedule set up so we might have to join him on some of those. But I had a blast.
I had a blast. I've noticed that Islanders fans are either 50 years old or 18 years old.
And that's pretty much it. I don't know how the breeding schedule works out there.
But everyone falls into one of those two demographics. They're all super friendly.
And then at the end of the game, the shoe that got thrown on the ice was amazing. The beer cans.
That's the mark of a great hockey town. At the end of the game, they littered the ice with whatever was close to them.
So it was like a bunch of beer cans get poured down there. And then one bastard out there just takes one of his shoes off and throws it.
I think you brought it. I think you brought the shoe.
No, I saw the video of it. He takes one of his shoes, throws it.
So now he's got to walk home with one shoe, but hell, it's worth it at that

point. You guys just won a

conference final game in

overtime. It was, yeah, I mean,

obviously the Coliseum, like every

game could be its last game there, so people

were just like, fuck it, we're throwing everything on the ice.

I, what I really

loved about going to the Coliseum,

it is as close to time traveling

as you can get, because it's

so, it's, you know, it was built in 1972,

they renovated it, but I was talking to Frankie

I believe. loved about going to the Coliseum.
It is as close to time traveling as you can get because it's you know, it was built in 1972. They renovated it, but I was talking to Frankie Borelli.
He's like, they barely renovated it. Yeah, I was trying to think what the renovations that they made could have been.
They put some paint on it. They nailed a fire extinguisher to the wall just in case something bad happened.
They put an extra trash can in every bathroom so you could piss in that. But it was like, it was it was a time travel it was back blast in the past the jumbotron is like there are many people in the world who have bigger tvs in their living room than the jumbotron doesn't show replays ralph macchio is fucking pumping up the crowd they have like a 1986 met there it was just awesome it was just a fun fucking time that felt like it was a blast from the past.
And the biggest thing I could not figure out that is the most baffling thing I've ever been a part of is the fact that we went to the Nassau Coliseum. The venue's a dump.
It's a time travel. By far and away the best Wi-Fi I've ever had inside of a stadium.
Wouldn you say oh i didn't log into the wife this is how the wi-fi was incredible even like the uh the the cell data service in there was strong it was incredible i was able to like text videos and shit i was i couldn't believe it in the net yeah it's actually well probably because there are only like 14 000 people in there but the wi-fi i was on the wi-Fi and it was fucking humming. It was better than Barstool's Wi-Fi.

And the owner sits in the stands because there are no boxes.

There's no suites. I felt so

bad for a friend, Kevin Love. The

camera panned to him right

after the lightning scored a goal. They were doing one of the

look at the celebrity in the stands

cheering on the Islanders. And it was right after the

lightning score. They put the camera on him

and no one's looking at the Jumbotron. So it was was dead silent in there.
And then he didn't chug a beer, unfortunately. But even Kevin Love, he was just in the stands.
Everyone, yeah. He was not in a primo box, as he would put it.
He was just sitting amongst the people. There's nowhere to go.
It's just seats everywhere, and there's no upper deck. It's fucking awesome.
I actually I grew to really love the toilet experience because at first it was like maybe most people might might think that it's a downside to have to wait 15 minutes to go take a piss. But then you got to realize how much extra bonding happened in those toilet lines.
And most most of the bonding was done over people saying just piss in the sink when you go in there yeah and then hank ran into an old friend to tell the story hank all right well i mean this is one of those pft was heard this whole thing it was it was it rattled me for the rest of the night we this happened right before the game winning goal and after the game winning goal all i could think about was mike kentzel who was like the guy that was feeding chris mortensen sources during the whole deflakey thing he was one one of the main enemies of the Patriots and Patriots fans. You had a chance Mike Kensal's a bitch.
When we got arrested at headquarters, what we were training was free Brady, fire Goodell, Kensal's a bitch. So me and Piftier are in line for like an hour.
We finally get to the next person in line to get to a urinal. So it's like the next person that walks away from the urinalinal you take that person's spot this old guy turns around i'm going to take his spot and i had to pee really bad because i've been waiting for a long time so i'm like thinking he's just going to walk past me as i'm basically getting ready to take a piss he puts his hand like on my shoulder and basically whispers in my ears like hey man i'm mike kentzel nice to meet you and walks away and it had been so long that it took me like 10 seconds as i'm pissing to beal Mike Kensal Mike Kensal and then I remember the chant and I was just like why did he even he introduced me like he was like a friend yeah I was like you I got arrested because I hated you yeah it was it was honestly baffling so I see this guy turn around from the urinal within a half second he IDs Hank makes a beeline right towards him gives him like a really strong pat on the

shoulder to the point where i thought i thought it might have been zolak it was a zolak type greeting that he gave him just like aggressive like you're my boy walked out and then hank pees like two uh urinals down from me as i'm peeing after about i don't know 10 seconds hank just starts laughing while he's pissing he's like oh my god i can't believe who that was he kind of with you.

Yeah.

It was wild.

It was like,

it was,

well,

it was just because

it was so quick.

I probably would have

had to go. laughing while he's pissing.
He's like, oh my god, I can't believe who that was. He kind of alpha'd you.
It was wild. It was just because it was so quick, I probably would have chirped him back if it was five years.
What was it, six years ago at this point? It was a jerk store moment with Kinsley. You thought of your reply 20 seconds later.
Yeah, then I just started laughing. I was like, Mike Kensel, Mike Kensel, and then I literally remembered Free Brady,'s a bitch.
And I was like, yeah. I'll put it this way.
If I was fights and I had seen what Kensel did to Hank and then left, I would be thinking real hard to myself that Hank was a mole this whole time. Because it was that type of like, he was saying hi to you like an old friend that he didn't know, you know, other people were supposed to know you guys were enemies.
It looked a little sus. But anyway, so that happened.
We walked upstairs. They win the goal shortly into overtime.
and the whole time i just was like rattled by my pencil it was in your head but either yeah i mean the the coliseum was awesome the venue is a dump but the fucking experience is incredible i hope we get to go back i really do although i don't i don't i mean yeah i hope so too but i also feel like it would be bad i'm also pretty sure he got he got I tried to look it up after. He got fired from the NFL shortly after that.
Yeah, he was wrong. He was wrong.
All right, we will update the overtime game if it happens while we're recording the rest of the show. We have to get to the other thing that happened yesterday while we were out at Stu's, which we will have Stu Feiner on the show in the next couple weeks.
It was a ridiculous day.

We'll talk about it on Fyre Fest.

Jay Williams.

Jay Williams.

Maybe the dumbest

back-to-back tweets.

He had one really bad tweet and then just

really made it worse.

If you missed the news, the Celtics

hired

what's his name? Fuck, what's his name?

Fuck, what's his name? Ime Adoka, black head coach from, he was assistant coach at the Nets. Jay Williams tweets out, the first head coach of color for the Celtics.
And even more importantly, he is one talented individual who has paid his dues. Now, I would say that 99.9999% of people know that this wasn't true.
And not only was it not true, but he picked the team that actually was the first team to have a black head coach in the history of the NBA, Bill Russell. They won a title with Doc Rivers.
They have had like four or five blackhead coaches. Jay Williams, all-time idiot, like dumb tweet and then on top of all of that he deletes it and waits like three hours and says, as it relates to the Boston Celtics tweet that came from my account a couple of hours ago, I did not post that and my passcode has now been changed.
Wow. So just like every hacker usually sets up, they spend years at hacking school so that they can one day tweet from Jay Williams' account that the Celtics hired the first black head coach.
You don't believe him that he got hacked? Yeah, I'm having a hard time. I will make it my mission.
Like, OJ is still looking for the real killer. Every day he looks in the mirror.
I'm going to find the real tweeter of Jay Williams. The hacker that specifically stole Jay Williams' password broke into his account to tweet out a take that Jay Williams would make anyways using the same punctuation and emojis that Jay Williams constantly makes.
Because this guy, Big Cat, this hacker, this guy's fucking good. He's real good.
This guy is really good. He spent...
You should all be afraid. If this can happen to Jay Williams, it could happen to any of us.
He spent... Think about this.
He spent... This hacker spent his entire life work getting into Jay Williams' account.
Oh, Canadians... Who are going to the Stanley Cup final.
Holy shit. All right.
Wow. Good luck, Canada.
Holy shit. They're Quebec, right? Are they considered a Canadian team if they win? Or are they a Quebecois team? Oh, my God.
That's crazy. I mean, dude, so we got to get back to Jay Williams.
But you know when I knew that the Canadians were going to win this series? When Whitney said they're going to lose? No. Well, no, that plus PFT and I got a text from both Whitney and Biz in back-to-back days saying, boys, we're going to do a live stream in Vegas for the Stanley Cup final when the Knights pump the Canadians.
And it's like, get ready. Here are the dates.
It's going to be epic. We'll do PMT and Spittin' Chicklets crossover.
And we both were like, that would be great. We could still do a stream from Vegas.
They wanted us to come out there. Yeah.
Are we going to? No, we were going to maybe if the dates worked out. And then Biz tonight texted us when the Knights were down.
He's like, hey, we're going to do Long Island if the Islanders win. So, unfortunately, the Islanders are probably going to lose.
It's going to be Tampa and Montreal. Yeah.
And you know what? That's a crazy fucking. I feel like this series right here, the Las Vegas-Montreal series, got a lot of credit for being the stripper series, like the two best strip club cities in North America.
Tampa is a very, very underrated strip club town, mostly because it's like... Oh, no, it's not underrated.
It's not that great, but it is prolific. Oh, it's...
Lots of strip clubs. Yeah, no.
Tuggies of them. It is a big time.
Most of the dancers happen to work in the WWE at some point, but it's still a very big strip club town. All right, so the Canadians, let's just give give them a little shout out right now.
Remember, they were down 3-1 to the Maple Leafs in the first round. Since that moment that they were down 3-1, they've gone 1-2-3 This is Mike Francesa.
11-2. Holy shit.
11-2 since that moment. And I love the explanation that our hockey guys give for their success, which is like there's something about you just put on that sweater in the playoffs and you're able to play well.
Well, it's Carey Price. Carey Price is standing on his head for the entirety of the playoffs.
So that means he's hot. Yes.
He's been incredible. Absolutely incredible.
So, yeah. All right.
Well, let's get back to Jay Williams becauseiams because jay williams needs a lot more talk it's a very it's a very wildly incorrect take you're right he picked like the worst possible franchise to use that as an example if i were to relate it to this podcast it would be like if we had blake shelton on we're like congrats to the first blake to ever appear on part of my take it would be as if you tweeted tweeted when Mookie Betts signed his long-term deal with the Dodgers. Congrats to the Dodgers for signing the first African-American player.
In Major League history. In Major League history.
Mookie Betts. Yeah.
Like, that's how he picked the worst possible team to do this for. And the hacker excuse.
I can't believe he went with it. We've said this a million times, but if you're going to say that you got hacked, you should at least put in a little bit of effort by tweeting out some porn links, some random Russian, some, I don't know, like trolling Chipotle or something.
I feel like they always do that too. Number one course of action for me would just change your avatar to the mask for V for Vendetta.
Correct. Just put that up there, and then people would be like, oh, shit, Anonymous got another one.
Right. And just tweet at Elon Musk, being like, I'm coming for you.
Give me Bitcoin. Yeah, it's so easy.
Yeah, post a picture of a Bitcoin chart. Yeah, it's so easy to just give a little bit more plausibility toibility to your awful awful excuse i don't think there's anyone who's having a worse like month than jay williams because he had the kd thing where kd just called him a liar and then this is you dude you cover the nba he's probably having a worse month well if you think he's dead no i mean yeah good point right he might point.
Right. Exactly.
He might be having an awesome month. Like having a whale orgy, just fucking every whale that he sees.
Exactly. But Jay Williams, you cover the NBA.
That's what you do. How did you get this so wrong? I don't understand it.
And how did you say that? Who told you to do the hacker thing? Well, the crazy part about Jay Williams is I think I need to go back and look at his exact career, but I'm pretty sure that he was a professional NBA analyst at the time that Doc Rivers won a national championship. Excuse me, an NBA championship.
You got it. With the Celtics.
What was that, 2009? 10? 2010? 2008. So maybe not, but close enough.
Yeah, he was definitely close enough. He had a little phase in between his basketball career.
Yeah, right, where he was trying to make a comeback and everything. But it's just, I actually think the hacking excuse is worse than the original tweet.
And the original tweet might be the worst tweet of all time. Like, that's how bad the hacking excuse.
I changed my account. What is the exact phrasing? I'm going to use this as a template going forward, by the way.
This one said, I got it right here. As it relates to the Boston Celtics tweet that came from my account a couple of hours ago, dot, dot, dot, space, I did not post that, and my passcode has now been changed.
Unbelievable. I want to see proof.
I want to see proof. I want to see proof that you changed your passcode i want to see the email saying that you had that you just updated your password and my favorite part anytime somebody gives an explanation like this like the fake hacker thing if you just look at what they try to tweet to tweet through it yeah uh he didn't even do that good a job of tweeting through it he just kind of carried on with his day like he was still just analyzing trey young which and then and then let's see uh 343 replies to that one 5.9 000 replies to this one 138 replies here uh drew holidays is straight putting in work a hundred replies to that one it's all about then i guess in a way it's probably the smart thing to just pretend it didn't happen because he's not gonna well maybe he won't lose his job in the short term maybe long term i just he's just a clown now like everyone's gonna laugh at him be like dude you did that like why not just say i fucked up i messed up i don't know why i thought this was the first black head coach for the celtics That was clearly an idiotic thing.
You shouldn't have even gone with the, I've reached out to Bill Russell, I've had a conversation with you, you know what I mean? Yeah. Like, there's so many different ways to go about this.
Kiss the ring a little bit. Kiss the ring, post your kids, post your dog, do all that shit, but the way you went about it was I got hacked.
Come on, man. Ridiculous.
I need to find out what Jay Williams had to say about Kyrie stepping on Lucky the Leprechaun, because this could be another case of the curse of Lucky. Yeah, that's true.
It's getting everyone. Other Twitter thing before we get to you, Paul Rabel, RG3, just now, I don't...
Bidding war, baby. He basically just got too horny online and fell in love with his wife in front of everyone.
I think's sweet i think that you should be you should be encouraged in in this society to be extremely inappropriate horny to a woman online as long as she's your wife yes it was probably in their vows he just that he's he's allowed to just she's allowed to thirst trap him online and then i mean he is doing the lord's work he's like intentionally sticking his neck out there or some other appendage and and drawing all the attention taking all the slings and arrows in order to just like help his wife's business get off the ground and i'd like to that he retweeted his wife his wife was like thanks for always being there for me like rg3 like see she can she's cool with this it's no shit put some respect on greta's name yeah just uh anytime you think like hey here's a video of my wife's ass

and I'm going to tell everyone how hot she is

just stop right there no no I say go for it

Robert go for it buddy well you are horny

I'm not I'm not horny

but I do appreciate the right of

another man in this society to be horny I think it's

what our forebears fought for but

I think it's also a very underrated thing about

Greta that her Twitter

or her Instagram handle is

Greta G3

so she got the Griffin and she got Thank you. I think it's also a very underrated thing about Greta that her Twitter or her Instagram handle is Greta G3.

So she got the Griffin and she got the three.

She's the third Greta.

She's Greta G3.

This is the guy who's got a bidding war, Jake.

Oh, yeah.

Yes. He blew them away with his own.

I can just picture like Jimmy Pitara, Norby sitting there watching like they watching they pop in an old VHS tape of his audition that they recorded on and they sit down and they just get blown backwards like the MTV commercials from the 1980s. By the way, one last thing about Jay Williams because I do think that the playbook for him is if he loses his job at ESPN he's going to be like the internet.
He'll do a big piece about how the internet bullied him and was mean to him. I give full permission, Jay Williams, to use every single piece of clip that was said in this show.
Yeah. I would actually be honored for you to be like, the guy's a part of my take called me a clown and that really hurt my feelings.
It sent me into a dark place. Because you know what? If he had just said you made a mistake, I'd have been like, we all make mistakes.
We would have laughed about it. But the fact that you tried to tell us that you were hacked were hacked uh-uh dude this there's never been a better situation to use the notes app than this then right after that that's all you had to do just notes app it just put put out like not even just a singular notes app if you had done the four different squares of screenshots of extremely long notes yeah i think by the end of the night we all would have forgotten about it it's such a nothing burger if you just respond right away being like, whoops, my bad.
Here are all the black head coaches in Celtics history. Boom.
Done. Oh, my God.
We're going to say, Jake. If that were to happen, there's an opening on John Shire's future staff to return to his alma mater, Jay Williams.
Oh, that would make the first black assistant coach at Duke, right? Nolan Smith. I mean, there's a million, dude.
Nolan Smith is currently on staff with John Shire. And there's also, what, Capel? Was there for a while, right? Johnny Dawkins.
That would be great if he was around for a while. See, all right, there you go.
That's how I'm going to do it. Who has the college basketball podcast here, Jake? I'm one of the people on the podcast.
There we go. I'll give Jay – this is Jay Williams out.
If he goes and works on John Shire's staff and in his introductory press conference says, finally, there's a black assistant coach, I will tip my hat and be like, I'm back on your side. All right, let's get to Paul Rabel.
Before we do that. Yeah, before we get to Paul Rabel, our great friends at When your home system or appliance breaks down, American Home Shield will help fix or replace the covered item, no matter its age.
Visit AHS.com slash listen for 20% off any plan. See AHS.com slash contracts for coverage details, limitations, and exclusions.
Now here he is, Paul Rabel. Okay, we now welcome on a friend of ours.
He is a recurring guest, a good friend of ours. Thank you.
It is Paul Rabel. We got a lot of things to talk about.
I don't know where you want to start. You pick any topic and we'll figure out a way to get where we're going.
Let's jump right into it. Or you can give us a number.
I have a list of things. So I'm going to start with thanking you all from over a year ago.
We did our first interview. You advised me to grow the sport by showing a dick pic.
Yep. And I didn't do that, but I got close to it a couple of weeks ago.
Wait, no. I don't like what you're doing.
I don't like what you're doing right now because you're trying. You're actually getting in front of the story that was topic number three.
Paul Rabel is now officially, officially. Julian Edelman not only retired from the NFL, he retired from being the thirst trap king.
You are now the thirst trap king. You are addicted to taking pictures and videos with your shirt off.
You think? Yeah. That many times? Dude, this video, we got to put it up there.
This video of you in the locker room after your first game,

when everyone else is wearing their shorts and you're in your underwear,

I cringed for you.

Spandex.

Yeah, it was bad.

You wear underwear, and I think you're wearing, is it a sports bra?

I didn't see that taking over.

I was trying to figure out whether or not to post it,

because you could see the mushroom shape of my penis.

I don't know. see that taking over.
I was trying to figure out whether or not to post it because you could see the mushroom shape of my penis. It's the fact that everyone else had their shorts on and you're like, wait, guys, we're going to do a quick video.
Let me whip my shorts off. I'm going to give out the game balls in my underwear.
I've been playing this game for 25 years and it's a quirk of mine. As soon as the game's over, I take everything off because I'm just sweaty and I want to be done with it.
So those who have played with me know that that wasn't a thirst trap move. But you do thirst trap.
It was risky. I've got hair everywhere.
You do thirst trap. I have a...
On occasion. Yeah.
Isn't Instagram thirst trapping? Listen, if you admit it, it actually is okay. You're just lucky because you've built a brand that you can make fun of people, and that is the engagement.
Correct. You guys stand alone.
That's what we're doing. You guys stand alone.
But listen, if I were in great shape like you, I'd probably have my shirt off all the time. So as long as you admit that, like, hey, yeah, sometimes I'll pop the shirt off because I want, you know, some people to slide in my DMs.
I'm cool with that. Julian Edelman, he begrudgingly got to that point after the famous Father's Day post where it was just him with his shirt off being like, happy Father's Day to my dad.
You haven't done that yet. It really was.
It was so... It was insane.
But the underwear thing. I'm getting in front of it.
Wow. So you're saying that that was attractive.
That you brought it up. Yeah.
Because it would have been worse had we gotten to bring it up on our own terms. Look, you guys told me to do it, a version of that.
It's true. I forgot about that.
That's shit. What about the other ideas we had? I feel like we had a million good ones.
Well, water dogs. Water Dogs is a great idea.
You're using the neon ball idea. Neon ball.
Here's an idea you haven't done. Jake Marsh calling a game.
We're trying to figure that out. Who do we got to talk to? Sam Floyd at NBC.
So have you talked to him? We've talked to him. Should we call him? Right now? Yeah.
Let's give him a call. All right.
I was ready to call him if you weren't. Okay.
Yeah, because I thought you were going to be like, no, I can't call him. Sam Flood runs Talent at NBCUniversal and NBC Sports.
Just make sure you tell him that we're taping so that we can't get in trouble. Right.
What are you doing? Are you texting? Okay, you're calling. He's calling.
He's calling. Oh.
Oh, since you straighted the voicemail. Let's try it one more time.
Let's try it one more time. Oh, no.
Trouble in paradise? Your call has been forwarded. No.
All right, I'll try. This works for me.
We'll try later in the show. No.
You must go to the plane. Whose phone is off? Oh, man.
All right. What are you drinking? Is that tea? No, it's vitamin C mixed into water.
Yeah. I saw it, and I was like, oh, who's dipping? Yeah.
Well, it was a semi-longer night last night. Oh, okay.
All right. So Jake, though, needs to get on the call.
How do we do this? What's the latest? Because I did pass you on to their team. Is it done? Are we going to make this announcement now? Wait.
I was waiting to hear from you. You're waiting to hear from me? Yeah.
I've not heard from anyone at NBC. Sounds like you're big league in our boy Jake.
No, I'm not big league. Tell them.
Tell them. I am advocating.
Am I not? Yes. You said you have influence, but Sam makes the final call.
Sam makes the call, but I think we're going to get it done. So it would be the Colorado weekend? Any game, any time, any place.
I'll say this right now. I know they want him to do the Water Dogs game for sure.
I'll say it right now. It would be the most watched game you have.
Over your live tweeting? Yeah. Jake has more influence? No, we'll obviously boost him.
It will be a collaborative effort, but it will be the most watched game that you have. Obviously, if it's on NBC Sports, it's not going to be as much as NBC, but platform to platform.
Maybe it might be. He will deliver the numbers.
He will deliver the best numbers that you have. I feel like that's right.
He sent an updated reel. It's good.
From a rating standpoint, are you only planning on playing during the weekends where your game is going to be on NBC and not NBC Sports? We have games on NBC Sports and NBC. Why does your game always end up on NBC? But you like to play on NBC.
It's not my choice, guys. It's out of your hands.
NBC makes those calls. And how'd you get Chris Hogan on your team? Our coach liked him.
And wanted to give him a tryout. And what's your team's record? We're 1-2.
Oh, really? Yeah. I actually didn't know that.
Yeah. We're 2-1.
Oh, that's better. I beat them into, well, I shouldn't say I beat a dog, but I beat the Water Dogs into shape.
I used negative reinforcement to get the Water Dogs. I think it worked.
They just didn't shoot the first game. I don't know who the coach is, but he was on the hot seat.
Now he's not. Yeah, Andy Copeland's a good coach.
He came from college. He sucked week one.
Well, I didn't like his strategy. You made that clear.
Yeah, I know. Isn't this good, though? Don't you want us to talk about it organically? Of course.
Yeah, I think it's fun. I've found my niche with lacrosse, and that is just criticizing my own team to the point where it's kind of awkward.

And I listened to the show earlier in the week when you guys were talking about power play.

Have you talked to any of the players on the Water Dogs?

Are they feeling pressure from ownership?

Are they mad at Team PMT?

I haven't talked to them, but my take is that it's a love-hate relationship.

They love us.

They love you, but they also hate when you hate them.

But it's, love-hate relationship. They love us.
We love you. But they also hate when you hate them.
But they love it when you hate them. Right.
It's results. And to talk about Monday's show, I don't know when this is going to air, but we were just actually talking about lacrosse.
I don't know what the fuck you did to us, but we actually were talking about lacrosse. It's a good sport.
I want to punch myself in the face. Like, what am I doing? You'll stop saying that at one point.
I don't think so. I think that's part of the fun.
As commissioner, have you found it hard to translate? You've always been a player. You've been around the game for a while.
Now you're in charge of things, and you sometimes have to be the bad guy. So, like, with suspensions, things like that, you've got a player biting another player's finger off.
Like, to me, I say let boys be boys.

That's just part of the game.

It generates headlines, right?

So on one hand, you're like, wow, lacrosse is in the news.

That's great.

On the other hand, well, there's a finger missing.

On the other hand, you're like, oh, that kind of sucks.

I got to suspend this guy.

So how do you balance that between being the bad guy and being, you know, I'm just Paul.

I'm a good buddy.

So I'm not the commissioner.

You're not?

No, no.

Shadow commissioner.

You guys know that.

I'm a co-founder.

I do not know that.

Thank you. bad guy and being, you know, I'm just Paul.
I'm a good buddy. So I'm not the commissioner.
You're not? No, no. Shadow commissioner.
You guys know that. I'm a co-founder.
I do not know that. I'm not the commissioner.
Who is the commissioner? So we have our head of player experience and our head of competition. So Seth Tierney and Brian Silk outrun that.
We have a disciplinary and conduct committee and I actually cannot make a comment. Who runs that? It's a board.
Mike Grable. No.
Mike and I are recused from any competition on field. Interesting.
It's in our laws. So can you get fined? You guys know that.
You have access to all the owner's docs. Yeah, I've read.
I want to be the commissioner. Make me the commissioner.
I've poured through those documents. This feels a little bit egregious.
You guys know the rules. No, I don't.
Wait, would you get fined if you said something? I would be potentially in legal risk. As owners, could we get fined? No, because you're not.
Yeah, you're just trying to impact your team so you guys can win. We can say whatever the fuck we want.
You say whatever you want. You could get fined for saying stuff that you shouldn't say, but this isn't out of context.
If you fishhook somebody, the person who's getting fishhooks should be allowed to bite your finger off. That might be your opinion.
Could we get fined for saying that a month ago you hit us up and you're like, hey, we've just finished the script for this season and the Water Dogs are going to lose the first game and then they're going to win every other game and win the title. So just want to let you guys know this will be great for us.
You wouldn't get fined, but we could press a suit because of the NDA that we have in place.

We have an NDA?

Yeah.

What are you, Dan Bilzerian?

What the fuck?

We have an NDA?

Everyone knows when you rig a league, everyone signs an NDA in advance.

You're right.

That's right.

That's right.

I got you. I'll pick it up.
Yeah. So I see what you did because they're going to lose a couple of more games.
So technically what you said isn't exactly what's going to happen. Right.
But it's close. But it's pretty close.
Are we going to do a three-point line eventually? Yeah, we talked. We're going to do like logos all over the field.
For real? No. Oh.
Oh, you were talking about a rock and jock when you'd have like the five-point shot. That would be it.
What do you guys think? I think a three-point line would be cool. I think just make goals worth four points each.
Why? Because the higher the score, the cooler. The better? Yeah.
It was Tony Khan. That was the owner of the Jaguars.
Do you want to see if he wants to invest in the league? Really? Yeah. Yeah.
Yeah, let's pitch him. PFT's right, though.
More scoring. If the game ends 52-48, I guess you wouldn't...
If it was four points, you can't. Score a gami.
Yeah. I mean, our game was high scoring on NBC.
What was the final score? 15-14 in overtime. We lost.
Let me ask you this. You didn't watch that game? No, that was a game you napped.
Dude, I fell asleep during all these games. I can't believe that.
If you go out there and one weekend the net is one inch wider and one inch taller, does anybody realize? Yes. The players would, but the fans might not.
By an inch? Yeah, big time. Well, the goalies suck anyway.
What's up with that? What's up with that take? They get like 20 saves in a game. They're ridiculously talented.
I feel like every shot goes in. Every shot on goal goes in.

All you got to do is shoot it low.

They can't get it.

It's a more difficult save when you shoot low.

Right.

No, I'm not saying that it's a goalie problem.

I think it's just they're set up to fail.

I think you said it was a goalie problem on the Monday show.

I might have said that.

But they are set up to fail.

Yeah, they suck.

They don't suck. Who's the best goalie? I can't say that.
The best goalie? Of all time. Is it Dylan or Cody? I would say probably it's a good question.
It changes over time. I mean, the best goalie that I played with was Jesse Schwartzman.
And how many saves did he get? Like, what was his percentage? He would save the ball 65% of the time. See, I guess that's...
Okay, so that's where I struggle with it, because you think hockey goalie. Hockey goalies are in the 95%.
You know what I mean? They're that high? Yeah, 90%. But that sucks.
That's why I don't like watching hockey. Because it's so goddamn hard to score.
You know what changed hockey forever was Patrick Waugh doing the butterfly. Yeah, yeah.
Because they never got down on their legs until that happened. What's the butterfly going to to be in lacrosse? Blaise Reardon does it.
What does he do? He literally drops to his knees and he keeps his stick high and then he soaks shots in the midsection. He wears a cup? He soaks shots? They wear huge cups.
It's no longer cups. They basically put pillows.
Wait, what's the guy's name? Blaise Reardon. His name's Blaise name is Blaze.
You know Blaze Reardon. We've talked about Blaze Reardon on the show.

Yeah, he's goalie of the year. He's really talented.
I feel like I could score on him.

Depends from where you're shooting.

Ten feet.

Probably. Yeah.

That's my problem, see? Ten feet's close.

Also, I just, here's my problem

with lacrosse is I, you know, like, I feel

like if you just run as fast as you can right

in the middle and just shoot it, you score every time.

That's right. But defenses

are gonna try to stop you from

Thank you. The problem with lacrosse is I feel like if you just run as fast as you can right in the middle and just shoot it, you score every time.
That's right. But defenses are going to try to stop you from doing it.
You get jammed up trying to do that. But I guess I get frustrated because I'm like, dude, just fucking run in the middle and shoot it.
It seems that way. Don't you feel that way when you watch basketball? Why isn't a guy just like, you see LeBron cut and dunk three times a game.
You're like, why doesn't he do this every time? No, you know what it is? I just solved all of lacrosse. You need to have charges.
You would want charges? Yeah, that would be awesome if guys could take a charge. Get run into? Yeah.
On the grass? Yeah, it'd just be like more penalties. Do you feel like it's hard to tell what's going on? Charge.
Guys taking charges would be sick. And that solves the game.
Yeah. We're going to get back to Paul Rabel in a second.
Before we do, I want to talk to you guys about it. All protein bars generally taste the same, but not one bars.
One made protein bars are actually delicious with Reese's and Hershey's. Only one Reese's peanut butter lover's protein bar is made with Reese's peanut butter.
And only one Hershey's cookies and cream protein bars is-me-up between meetings or you need some fuel to power you through your next workout. One also has other delicious flavors like birthday cake, maple glazed donut, and blueberry cobbler.
Find all one bars at a retailer near you or on amazon.com. Now more Paul Rabel.
When you scored that goal the other week, the one where you caught it in there, you jumped in the air, caught it, and then took a couple steps and shot it, how quickly did you get on the phone with ESPN and be like, hey, you have to make sure that this makes the top 10? As soon as possible. My goal.
Yeah, as soon as possible. My goal has to get the top ten.
And I'm not talking seven. I want a number three or higher.
Right. And it got nine.
That was tough. Okay, yeah, that sucks.
Yeah. How is it going? For real, real question, how is it going overall? I feel like you guys, I do nap during the games, but I do also have found myself, I don't know what you've done to me, but I genuinely do enjoy watching lacrosse.
Maybe not the Water Dogs week one. But how is it going overall? Do you think you've hit some of the marks that you've set out for? Yeah, I mean, it's gone really well.
So we've expanded. When we were first in here, we were talking about competing with MLL, and then we merged with them this offseason.
So we are now just a singular professional outdoor lacrosse league, and all those players that were playing at ML previously either came on to new teams or are hoping to get onto a team. We expanded from six to eight teams.
Was that a hostile takeover? It wasn't hostile. It wasn't friendly, though.
It sounds like it wasn't. It wasn't friendly at first.
Interesting. Back in 2017.
Right. Because we're like, we're the big swinging dick on the block right now.
You have to join us. And that never happens in pro sports.
Yeah. It's usually the upstart league tucks into the existing one.
How many teams did you guys resort? All of them into perpetuity. But we just expanded one team with the cannons there's a team i was drafted to and the team that i got traded to got it this offseason right got it which happened organically your brother the commissioner got it and also the team that chris hogan plays for right so happened.
So, yeah, when can we get a big check? That's what I'm mostly interested in. So let's continue to talk about the PLL on this show.
It makes a ton of sense for you because the bigger you guys bring attention to the games, the bigger the games get, the more revenue. You need to say that and put that in there.

Both positive and negative. Attention to the game.
Any attention is good attention. Because I will be bringing negative attention.
Right. Most of this interview is negatively positioning me.
Well, let me ask you a question that's more about lacrosse. Do you feel that your high pocket, W pocket, was detrimental to a lot of the beginner lacrosse players trying to emulate you? Great question.
who

who to a lot of the beginner lacrosse players trying to emulate you? Great question. Who wrote that question? I said what I said.
Are you trying to buy time because you know that you've ruined the future lacrosse for children? I was just getting ready to Edelman, and I realized that I was going to position myself with a thirst answer. No, it was the guy next to you.
It was Billy. Okay.
So it's basically equivalent to the Ovechkin curve, which he really curves his stick, which makes it hard to play hockey, but it's a skill stick. And what happened was when I first started playing, that's when radar guns were introduced at the professional level, and then the game became all about who can shoot the fastest, and people start know getting big pockets and tightening their shooting strings and then they can't play the game well except they can shoot a ball hard okay so that's probably the answer to your question so it fucked up the skill at the youth level it was kids just trying to chase a fastball and not develop all the other stuff 100 it's like going out and just being a good three-point shooter yeah well steph curry has ruined basketball in a way You think so? Have you thought about doing Paul Rabel camps to make up to the children where you go around and you teach the kids the other important skills? I was literally only doing...
Like how to play Crash on guitar and all these other things that you're going to need to know? Do you know what Crash is about? Sex. Yeah.
Yeah, it's about fucking... Yeah.
Yeah. It's the third strap of the song.
Yeah, it's his least favorite song yeah yeah you should always you should a band play your hits they should always like their hits more than the people listening to it what dave was early days is what the pol is early days of lacrosse he used to busk you know that yeah he'd set his guitar stand up and he'd play outside for 20 bucks that's pretty then he absorbed carter absorbed Carter Beaufort. The next thing you know, championships.
Yep. Multiple titles.
And sold out venues. Yeah.
Which is where we're going to be. So what's one thing that we can be doing better as owners to help grow the game? Honestly, you guys are two of our best owners.
Thank you. Two out of how many? Our cap table is pretty big.
Yeah. So Joe Tai, Churning Group, CAA, Harris Blitzer Sports Entertainment, Arctos, Crafts, Blum Capital, Brett Jefferson, so Hildene, Rain Ventures.
So all pretty strong groups. See, the Crafts like Robert Craft.
Yeah. So he's one of the owners.
He's an owner. Okay.
Did you feel like a little bit left out that you weren't invited to chip in on that birthday present for him? No. You dropped off the Bentley? No, I'm a lacrosse player.
I can't contribute to that. Okay.
What's this man up power play situation? Like, people keep coming at me being like, hey, dude, this man up. It's like, dude, they say power play.
It's a fucking power play. Okay.
So you're saying that. Yeah, of course.
Paul Rable, the greatest lacrosse player of all time, is saying it's power play, not man up. Everyone shut up.
Yeah, because what you have then on the women's game is they're saying woman up, and it's become a gender thing, and you could say player advantage. That was the other thing we thought about.

Nope.

Power play.

It's a power play.

They're on the power.

Right.

It's pretty simple.

Everyone knows it.

How does it work, though?

Do they take one guy off?

Yeah, one guy goes to the sin bin.

Got it.

Nice.

I like the sin bin.

Yeah.

Do they call it that?

So it should be man down?

We don't, but we should.

Yeah, that's what we were saying.

Yeah.

The sin bin?

The sin bin is way cooler.

Yeah.

It should be...

Done.

Sin bin.

It should be like one of those old school things where you grab money because you don't pay the players, right? We pay them a fair amount. Oh, really? Yeah.
Oh, okay. Well, my guys were hitting me up saying that they wanted some Coors Light at the bar, and you actually still have to pay for that.
Players always want more. Yeah, that's true.
Did you get the tab? I saw you were going to pass it through. Wait, don't answer that question.
He's the shadow commissioner. That could be illegal.
Remember, Mike Rabel is head of the players' union. Is that right? Do I have that right? No.
No, it's your dad that's head of the players' union. That's right.
How many vodka Red Bulls are we allowed to buy for our players' per week? That's not in their rider. So you could probably...
Is there a cap? No. No cap? No.
I love it. Do you think...
It's never going to go to a city model. I actually think that what you've done is worked in that respect.
That you pick a team. There is no city.
Just go with it. Yeah.
I think we could as it grows but right now just looking at the the audience size objectively and where audiences are all over the country and then what we did with our network deal with mbc is like let's optimize for distribution and viewership and let's try to be where our audience is so let's go on the road the other thing is when we saw the Super League announce and then turn over, they were basically doing what we are doing already, which is these teams and these players have this value that's agnostic to geography, and we're going to take them everywhere because attention is what drives revenue. Right.
More than geography traditionally. But geography still has a big pool, so as we grow, we'll probably flip to that.
And if we did, what would you guys take? Waterdogs? I was going to say Seattle, just because then we could be like, we're bringing a... Hey, big...
Well, no, just a big press conference where we're bringing a professional franchise to Seattle over the Sonics. Nah, dude, it's the Waterdogs Maybe...
No one watches it. What's the biggest city in America that doesn't have a professional sports team?

The ones that typically don't perform well.

Louisville?

It used to be Austin.

Yeah, it might be Louisville.

Louisville?

Let's see.

That'd be good.

Georgia is...

Hawaii.

Atlanta has had a number of teams come in and leave.

Yeah.

I'm trying to think.

Where would we go?

What city do we always trash?

You guys don't like to travel.

I'm surprised it just wasn't very fast in New York. Yeah, Cincinnati would be good.
Honestly, probably Vegas. Cincinnati would be good.
Vegas. Vegas would be sweet.
Everyone's going to try to get Vegas. Yeah.
Philly would be funny. Riverside, San Bernardino.
Ontario, California. Metro population 4.3 million.
I love Vegas. Yeah.
Vegas. You guys should just pull up Jeff Bezos and wherever you are or wherever you want to go, that's where the team goes.
I like that. I like that a lot.
Cincinnati would be funny though. We just give free Skyline Chili to everyone and then no one comes to the game.
Then shut down the bathrooms at the game? It's chaos. No, that's the name of a team.
You're on it. Wait chaos? Yeah.
Oh, shit. I thought it was Chrome.
You're secretly upset. It's Chrome and chaos.
Got it. Yeah.
You know everything about the PLL. Chrome, chaos, Redwoods.
Yep. Whipsnakes.
Don't give me any more, Billy. Your team.
Waterdogs. Cannons.
Yep. Two more.
At-Lie. Yep.
Atlas. That's right.
Both work. One more.
There's another one. Very forgettable team name.
Fuck. It is.
No, don't give it to me. What's the first letter? It's an A.
It's an A. Arrows? Nope.
What is it? They use arrows. I don't fucking know.
Archers. Archers.
Yeah. Archers are kind of like cowards, right? When you think about it.
They just stand all the way back and they shoot everyone. They're like snipers.
Yeah, they don't get their hands dirty. Legolas.
Right. They're just fucking...
That sucks. They're the number one team right now.

They are?

Top of the table.

They're 3-0?

They're 2-0.

But they haven't played three games, so...

No, their goal difference is huge, though.

They're not battle tests.

I think it's like 14.

Oh, because they played us week one.

No, we did.

That helped us.

Cannons?

Cannons beat Water Dogs.

It was like 9-1.

A lot of people are calling...

At halftime.

A lot of people are calling the Water Dogs frauds because their goal differential is only one. They've got two wins, one loss.
Is the F word applicable here? I'm not the commissioner. Who's the biggest fraud? That's your dog.
Who's the biggest fraud in the league? Oh, man. Oh, this is good.
What team or player? Are you saying player? It's up to you. Yeah, you go with it however you want.
Give us a take. Who's the biggest fraud in the league? And you can't say us as owners.
Well, I mean, if you polled everyone, they'd say me. There was an Instagram post this offseason.
It got me hot. Eddie Glazner, who's a defender for the Redwoods currently.
I think he's one of their captains. He uploaded an Instagram story of his buddy, and it just said, Rabel's a fraud.
And I screen grabbed it, and I saved it as my home screen. And now he's suspended for life.
He deleted it. Oh, okay.
We did not suspend him for life. Okay.

He killed him. But we haven't talked.
I unfollowed him.

I got Teddy. I like

that. Of course, the Instagram king unfollows

you? Yeah, the

thirst trap king unfollowed him. You noticed that immediately.

Wow, that's actually awesome. You need more

of this. This is good.
Bad blood. So, right.

Why don't you fight him?

I would. Can you fight in lacrosse? Yeah.

Oh. Well, we

gotta sell that more. Yeah.

There was a fight in week

Thank you. don't you fight them i mean i would can you fight in lacrosse yeah oh well we got to sell that more yeah there was there was a fight in week three of our first season and then what's happened was probably why the games have been so competitive are uh the the 2020 tournament was basically was 20 20 games in 14 days so it's basically like a a playoff.
So the competition was so high that it spilled over into this year. And the first two weeks, everyone's acting like this is single elimination.
Yeah. So when that happens, fewer people take risks and there's less catchable play.
And any time there's a fight, you're making a five-minute trade on both sides. 19 players dressed.
You need a goon or you need a big score difference for a tilt to happen. Can we look into hiring Tom Wilson? I think we have someone sitting in this room that's our goon that could go into war mode.
Take out their best guy? I don't think anyone would step to Tom Wilson except one person, Brody Merrill. Brody.
Brody's the toughest motherfucker I've ever seen in lacrosse. So he's, I think he's 38, but he was.
Tom would beat the fuck out of him. He'd break his hip.
I mean, he held the heavyweight title in the NLL for probably seven years. I mean, he's a big fucker.
He's 6'5 from Ontario and Chuck's left and right. And yeah, he'll fight anyone.
When was the last time you got into a fight? Because people are saying that you're scared that you won't fight anymore. They are.
I haven't fought in outdoor. I heard that as well The last fight I got into was in the NLL, and I was traded the next day.
Oh. Yeah, which wasn't great.
Did that have something to do with the fight? I thought I did all right. I hung in there.
Interesting. Are you hanging? I hung in the hole.
Chin to elbow. Jersey grab.
Reach. Only counter.
Okay. So you wait for him to swing, and then you manipulate him with the grab arm and try to get your one precise shot in.
Yeah, or you use the jersey grab to pop the nose. Yeah, the jab.
So you're saying that you're not afraid to fight now. I'm not afraid to fight, but I wouldn't consider myself a great fighter.
Okay. And I also think it's a bad trade.
No one wants to go in a penalty box for five minutes. Sinbin.
But yeah. We call it the Sinbin.
Right. How many weeks are there this season? There's 11.
And when does it end? September 18th. That's going up against football.
I know. I know.
But we have an NBC window. Let's not do that next year.
So you want to truncate it further? I think you start a little bit earlier, but you can't. I'm just being...
Well, now that you signed your docs, you can come to the board meetings and give that input. I'm just saying that's a bad idea.
Right. I don't disagree with that.
Yeah. We've got to clean that up.
Football is a juggernaut. It is.
I mean, it's just not. That's why you guys...
No, you guys are coming to the championship. When is that? It's in D.C.
When is that? September 18th. We'll be there.
What day of the week is that? It's a Saturday! It's a Saturday! I'm not going to be there. You are going to come.
No, I'm not. Even if the Waterdogs aren't there? No, I'm not.
Sunday the 19th. Sunday the 19th.
Even more not going to be there. Has the NFL started, though? The NFL started? We'll just be there'll just be there for an hour.
Let's see what the football team schedule is. You know what? I speak for the regular fan.
We are gambling now. Now that you signed, you can't gamble anymore either because you signed.
We need to get some stuff into the Barstool Sportsbook app. I know we have some fun, but I actually do kind of consider myself a lacrosse fan now.
It's fucking crazy. I don't know what you did to me.
I actually watched the games. I fucking watched the game on Peacock.
Yeah. It was great.
You guys, I mean, not to get sappy, but you guys have been with us from the start. It's true.
We broke news here. Yep.
That we were going to expand. You guys named a fucking team.
Yep. Which, awesome name, awesome colors.
We do have the best colors. Yeah.
By far. I love the colors.
Literally from scratch. Yeah.
So, and now this obviously leads up. Your owners.
This leads up to the big announcement we had here today. Paul Rabel is effectively retired from all lacrosse.
We weren't supposed to do that. When you say there's a I was moment, there's a guarantee that we're just not going to actually have it.
How much longer are you going to play for real? Not much longer. Really? Yeah.
I'm 35. Yeah, I know.
This is a real question. Yeah, I get checked now, and I have bruises that last for weeks.
So it's actually going to... My hips crack in the morning, my knees crack.
One more year? We've got to do one more year. This has got to be like a Coach K thing.
I think it's actually going to My hips crack in the morning One more year We got to do one more year This has got to be like a Coach K thing I think there's got to be a retirement tour Now I know you're setting me up No you get to see it Honored in every city that you go to I can already see it right now Next year this exact time He's on his Paul Rabel retirement tour He comes into this office and like, dude, you're so fucking lame for this retirement tour. He's like, you guys told me to do this.
Right. Exactly.
Yeah. We should make sure we rewind the tape to two years ago.
I totally forgot about the dick to make it. Now it's like, shit, I am complicit here.
Well, you shouldn't follow our advice. Like, that's on you if you think that we're smart enough to believe.
Our best advice, don't follow our... Is it? Because the league's working.
That's true. And I really do think...
Who's Machiavellian here? I weirdly do think that I have found, like, making fun of our own team is so much fun. Right.
So, like, I've found my way to talk about lacrosse. Last year, I didn't really know how to talk about it because I didn't, like, I actually like to bully my own team.
Doesn't Jerry Jones do that? Yeah. But not as actively as we do.
It's fun. Yeah.
So if we lose, it's a problem. I actually support the boys.
We have a good cop, bad cop thing. I love our team.
I think they're perfect at everything. Except for week one.
And shooting the ball. There's something about a coach that can't get the boys ready for week one.
That's a serious concern that I have. Week two is great.
We played them. So were you like, these guys suck? No, I didn't think that, but I could feel that they were tense.

Yeah, they didn't shoot.

Yeah.

Wait, did Commissioner Rabel be like, hey, you can't beat Paul on week one?

Well, I'm not a commissioner.

Right.

Your brother's the CEO?

Yeah, he's the CEO.

Oh, interesting.

Yeah.

Hmm.

Do you think that there's certain players that feel bad if they make you look stupid on a highlight? Or if they check you and knock you off your feet? It's the opposite. I went from having, I think, a lot of friends that I played against and with.
And the reason I feel that way is they came over to join the league. Even if they didn't like me, they trusted me.
To now, having very few. That actually does suck.
It sucked. Yeah.
Yeah. Do you want to be friends with us? Yeah, you can feel bad.
I thought we were friends. Yeah, no best friends.
Really good friends. But that means, so that's another thing, like once you retire, you'll probably gain some friends back.
I don't know. If I retire, then I'll sit in here and you guys, we can talk about commissioner stuff.
And commissioners are hated. So I just think I'll keep being in that place.
I'm seeing, do we have any other... Until I get out of lacrosse.
Do we have any other questions? Oh, Billy had a... Are you playing better second week to prove to your girlfriend you're actually the goat of lax like you said you were? Playing better in the second.
Was shitty in the first week? Yeah. That's what Bill said.
I thought I was better in the first week. Yeah, no comment.
Okay. No comment.
Is having a girlfriend good for lacrosse? I think having a girlfriend is a good thing. Is it good for our sport that we care so deeply about and want to grow? Yes.
Are you going to have the same amount of time to commit to lacrosse as you did in the past now that you've got a girlfriend? Well, in my heyday when I was actually playing my best ball, I was married. And then I stopped being married and started playing my worst ball.
I retired from marriage. Things happen.
That was my first retirement. Yeah, no, I think that, yeah, I think there needs to be like wags in lacrosse like there are in soccer and hockey.
I actually think that's all good.

It should be mags.

It should be moms.

So the players' moms should be in the stands because if they're anything like soccer moms or hockey moms, they fucking hate each other.

And they hate like each other's children.

And they get mad when their son doesn't do as well.

You get the moms in a little group together in the stands and let them duke it out.

Have them like throwing beer on each other. That's what you need.
The moms duke it out amongst themselves, not with the girlfriends. Parent fights play.
Dad's running on the field and trying to punch people. That's all fun.
Right. And what do you guys think about the refs? The refs.
They're great. They do a great job.
They do a great job. Good.
I mean, it's a thankless job, right? Right. No one grows up wanting to be a ref.
There was a clip of...

I have yet to play a game where we get more power plays than the other team.

Right.

Like, I have an issue with that.

Wow, you're going to get fined for this, but how much do you pay them for real?

They get paid their quote.

They're not officially unionized, but they're a cohort of refs.

I'm just thinking where I should start to buy them.

We should just buy all the refs.

Look, man.

Like, if the refs get paid.

You have your Carta.

You showed me your Carta, Link.

You have stocks now that are into your...

We can't talk about this.

Right, right.

Okay, that's fair.

So you can't pay the reps.

What if the owner's unionized?

Yeah.

Have you thought about that?

Yeah.

I'm not sure that that's a thing.

Yeah, owner's former unionist power in a union did.

The way that owners...

Austin Robert Kraft, the working man sticking together.

The way that owners unionize is they just fire us.

Right.

They fire the front office.

I think it's called collusion when owners do it, now that I think about it.

Yes, yes.

It's a different side of the corner.

I'll see you next time. the owners unionize is they just fire us.
Right. They fire the front office.
I think it's called collusion when owners do it.

Yes.

Different side of the coin.

All right. Well, give us one.
Let's end with this.

What's one thing we can do better? What can we do better for you? Wow.

Wouldn't have thought that I would be sitting

here with that question.

I'm being genuine

to you. I know.
I'm like, this is a big gen This is like a genie in the bottle. What I can do for you.
And we're not going to reverse it on you once you get sincere with us. Nope.
We're going to take it face value. Yes.
Host a water dog on the show. Oh, okay.
Yes. Like an actual water.
Yes. Like a Newfoundland player.

No, I want to actually have our, I want to have Drew.

Snyder.

Snyder.

Yeah.

And also our goalie's cool.

Drew's got a talented girlfriend.

She's a musician in Hollywood.

So we want, we want.

Not a mag, but a wag.

Okay, what about the guy with long hair and the mustache?

Mickey Schlosser.

Yeah, Mickey Schlosser's cool. I think you know what? We'll have Mickey, Drew, and the goalie.
Dylan? It's Mikey. Is it Mikey or Mickey? Mikey.
Mikey? Mikey. Mikey.
But it's spelled Mickey. See, this shows I'm not really a commissioner.
I didn't even sign his deal. So Mickey, Dylan.
Dylan is our... He's going to fucking hate me for that.
Motherfucker doesn't know my name. Well, Jake got it right because he's going to be announcing the game.
Yeah, thank you. Dylan is our goalie? Dylan's your goalie.
Good guy. And Drew Snyder.
Great guy. Bring all three of them on.
If you combine three lacrosse players, you might have the personality of one regular athlete. But I was going to finish, bring a dog on a week through the end of the season.
I mean, if you bring a puppy into this studio, I will absolutely pet it and take care of it. No, we'll definitely have someone on the water dogs on.
That'd actually be fun. Yeah.
I thought you were going to say go to a game. I was like, no.
I think it's going to happen organically. You love the PLL.
You know it. I do love the PLL, but I'm not going to again.
You're trying to reconcile with it internally right now because you grew up hating lacrosse. I didn't even grow up.
It's never crossed my mind. And now it's all in your mind.
All I think about. I woke up this morning, and I swear to God, first thing I thought when I got out of bed, I was like, does Paul and Rob Pinnell not get along on the Atlas? Is it like a Kyrie LeBron scenario? Yeah, that's what I was thinking, too.

Neither of us play there anymore because of that.

Good question, Billy.

You fuckhead.

They blew up the team.

No, I actually...

You know, we both got traded off of Atlas.

Yeah, we didn't talk about this.

The co-founder of the league got traded by one of the coaches

that he participated in the hiring process for to the Cannons. And Rob Pinnell got traded.
Ryan Brown got traded, who's with the Water Dogs. And all of us are playing well.
So they blew up the whole—you guys won the championship? We didn't play well in 2020. Oh, but you won in 2019, right? Nope.
Oh. Haven't won in a while.
I know my history. Who won? The Whip Snakes.
Two times? Two times. So they're bad for lacrosse.
You could say they're good. They win the third time, that's bad for lacrosse uh you could they win the third time that's bad for lacrosse officially that's what happened in the nhl when they started i think the canadians won the first three yeah okay um we're told that you have a very important podcast to do right now called token ceo yes yes are you going are you going to go on there and bash us no i love you guys all right we give you some tough love that i.
But I actually do like lacrosse. It's the right stuff.

It's fucking gross.

I hate it.

I really don't.

I don't have another.

I don't have enough time.

God damn.

That should have been my wish.

You don't talk shit about lacrosse anymore.

Paul, I don't have enough time in my life to add another sport and lacrosse has somehow

gotten into the rotation.

That's the problem.

So what are you cutting?

Nothing.

If you had to cut a sport.

Time with my son.

You happy you did that? Yeah, you did that. If you were to cut one sport, what would it be? Lacrosse.
That's easy. Can we end the segment before that? Well, we're able to pass.
Thank you. Thanks, guys.
Fyre Fest of the Week is brought to you by... We're going to get right back to the show.
Top reasons your career wants you to move to Ohio.

So many amazing growth opportunities,

high-paying jobs in technology,

advanced manufacturing, engineering,

life sciences, and more.

You'll soar to new heights,

just like the Wright brothers,

John Glenn, even Neil Armstrong.

Their careers all took off in Ohio,

and yours can too.

A job that can take you further, and a place you can't wait to come home to. Have it all in the heart of it all.
Launch your search at CallOhioHome.com. All right, back to part of my take.
Okay, let's wrap up. We got Fyre Fest of the Week.
Henry, would you like to start? Sure. My Fyre Fest was that the creator of Game of Thrones, this is like one of those things.
Game of Thrones, was obsessed with it, loved it, was fully invested into it. Ace season sucked.
It took me a long time to get over. It was just a shitty feeling when you're so invested in something and then it just gets wasted away.
But I had gotten over it. It had been a long time, been like two or three years, whatever, since whatever since it came out hadn't really thought about it uh and then today george martin says he regrets letting the game of thrones series surpass the books i wish i'd stayed ahead i had a five book head start i never thought they'd catch up with me but they did that made it strange the show was ahead going in somewhat different directions so basically he was just trying to be like yeah yeah, I also thought the ending sucked.
Whoops.

But he's also like, my bad, that one's on me. Which just then refreshes all the memories.
You're like, yeah, it really sucks how bad they fucked that show up. It's also been hilarious for the last, I don't know, four years watching George R.R.
Martin periodically do interviews, being like, yeah, I'm working real hard on the next book. It's almost done.
And I don't think he's written a single word. If you look at anything that he's said in the press recently, I think he's just completely lying about it.
I don't think he's started the next book at all. Yeah, I agree with you.
He just basically was like, oh, they'll never make it this fast. I mean, but also respect to George R.R.
Martin because he's cashed in. He's probably like sitting on a weird beach somewhere.
He probably had a beach guy. I'll take that back.
He's sitting in like a dimly lit pub somewhere wearing a felt hat. Dude, he's a pants at the beach guy.
Yeah. He's sitting in a library somewhere by himself.
Yes. And just being like, yeah, I'm definitely hard at work on this.
Psych, I have enough money to kill God, so I'll be fine for the rest of my life. But, I mean, there was a global pandemic we had.
The whole world was locked in their houses, and no one was like, you should watch Game of Thrones. That's when you know how bad of a fuck-up it was.
I remember everyone talking about shows you should watch and stuff, and no one was like, watch Game of Thrones. Right.
I tried that. Loved it until, actually, you know what? I didn't really...
It just gets me mad. I think about it sometimes.
I'm like, oh, you know, I love Game of Thrones. I should watch it.
But I know if I start watching it, I'm just going to get mad what i didn't really it just gets me mad i think about it sometimes i'm like oh you get mad i love game of thrones i should watch it but i know if i start watching it i'm just gonna get mad i didn't yeah because i'm gonna get invested again knowing that it sucks at the end so it's like what's the point when i watched it because i'd seen the last season one time before when it was happening in real time but when i watched it through the entire thing um i thought the last season sucked but i wasn't like pissed off about it but that's because i didn't have like years invested into it I didn't spend like two years waiting for that last season I was mad that it sucked but yeah I was the same way I had binged it in like a matter of months so it wasn't, people invested years and years of their life we should get him on the show, he's a big Jets fan George Perfect. George R.R.
Martin, care to explain yourself? Yeah.

We'll help you write the next season of it.

Yeah.

Just do.

Yeah, we'll write the next book.

How do you feel about one of the direwolves having a boner?

That's question number one.

And then they get lost north of the wall.

Yeah.

Yeah.

We could actually make this work, George.

Absolutely.

All right, PFT, your fire fest.

My fire fest of the week is there's a massive blood shortage in America. Oh.
There's a big blood shortage because I guess people aren't taking time out. Too many bonus? People aren't taking time out to go give blood anymore because we spent the last year making a lot of sacrifices in the name of public health.
I think it's the last thing on people's minds. I was thinking that the three of us could start some sort of a group, like a berserker blood organization.
I'm in. Count me in.
We just encourage people to go out, donate blood. You're saving lives.
We had Greg Olson on the show earlier this week, and he told us about an easy way to save lives, which is becoming an organ donor. An easier way to save lives is by becoming...
But PFT, I don't really have a lot of money, but I like to drink. Yeah, that's a good point, Hank.
But the great thing about giving blood is if you give blood, you get drunk off like half a beer afterwards. So it's actually very economical.
Are you saying that the people who have been doing outreach to try to get people to donate blood have just not been doing their job? They haven't been doing their job. They just haven't been getting the message out there? I think, you know what I think happened? I think a lot of people tried to do the whole donate blood thing for clout last year, and they didn't have any follow-through on anything.
Got it. So they weren't able to actually enact change.
I think that we could actually encourage people here. And also, if you donate blood, you get a little light-headed.
If you mix a workout you feel like you're a god almost you feel like you're this big like behemoth of a man and all you do is watch football and eat meat uh-huh and talk about sports i'm mr me but you are mr me i eat the most meat in this room i'm just thinking that like you know you could save a life if you donated blood yeah all right something to think about i in. Count me in.
The berserker blood cult, we call it the BBC. You know what? You sold me.
All right. You are a great salesperson when it comes to this.
Thank you. I'm just trying to be an ambassador for health.
Uh-huh. Write down Mr.
Meat counts for one pint of blood. All right.
Put me down. I'll put you down for one.
Yeah. All right.
My fire fest is that we went to Two Finders house and I'm old and I'm tired and I'm fucking like my whole body hurts from playing wiffle ball and wrestling with Billy in the pool. Also, I think that because we haven't been out in public and doing things and like taking pictures, we were just getting roasted.
Every picture that was posted yesterday, people were just going over with a fine tooth comb being like look at this look at that look at this because that's what the internet loves to do and we haven't given them a chance to do that in a very long time and there's going to be video coming out too that's the worst are you going to selectively edit that as well no i'm no no i'm worried about myself yeah i mean it's not good it not good. The worst part about being fat is when people take pictures of you, you look even fatter.
Also, fuck the people that are like, you don't have a six pack. I said that a week ago.
Yeah, that's true. I brought that up, that I don't have a six pack.
And people are like, dude, you don't have a six pack. I'm like, yeah, I know.
I said it that I'm working to get there. It's crazy that you haven't gotten a six pack in five days.

Do this for me, AWLs.

Next time you want to roast us, post a picture of yourself in the reply.

I'll retweet a good roast if you look hotter than all of us.

Not only a picture of yourself, but a picture of yourself standing at the exact same angle that we're standing at.

It is angle season big time.

I'll let you know that I think all the pictures that hank posted online today were candid shots which is always that's always a real treat just really letting it all hang like out of breath yes standing sideways like reaching out and touching our knee because it's sore and we're definitely at the age we're just spending a day outside if i'm outside for eight hours in a day the next day I feel worse than any hangover you could possibly give me. Yeah.
I don't want to say. I'm an indoor cat now.
Yeah. I don't want to say we're victims in any way, but we do get bullied really hard online whenever a picture drops.
When the new pictures drop, it is a roast show. It's bad.
And you know what? Unfortunately, it's a roast show every time I look in the mirror every morning. So I see it.
I know it. I've got to tighten it up.
We'll get better. Mr.
Meat is back. But yeah, playing wiffle ball and wrestling with Billy in the pool was a lot.
What else did we play? Demi. Demi was fun.
It was okay. I enjoyed Demi.
I thought it was okay. It's hard to see.
There was a lot of moments when we were playing Demi where it's like, what are we doing? Yeah, but most of the time. I got a couple of them.
What was crazy was Jake was dominating at Demi, and he didn't even have his glasses on. I know.
I think Jake just wears the glasses because he thinks it makes him look more professional. There was a moment, and I'm sure if you want to go see Stool Seeds, it's all there, but we started just playing a game of football football rugby hybrid with a greased up watermelon and i was just wrestling i was just wrestling billy and after like 20 minutes of it i was like ow my wrist hurts ow my knee hurts like why am i wrestling a 22 year old this is a very good way to hurt myself i realized it was about time to hang him up when uh i had Glenny Balls apologize to me twice for kicking me in the balls.
At that point, it's like, okay, I don't need to have my virility and fertility stolen via Glenny Balls' big toe. I was just hanging off Billy as he was trying to get a watermelon out of his hands.
Like, what are you doing with your life, man? But Stu was a great host. Yeah, he's the best.
We love being out there. People pleaser.
I do want to go out to his house again and again, especially in the summertime. Yeah, more football.
I love being in Long Island. We got a stretch.
And on his pool. Yeah, he did say, Long Island, we're Long Island people now, I guess, because they love us out there.
All right, Billy. Or no, Jake and then Billy.
Billy will wrap it up with Firefest and a recap yeah couple things shout out the matchism three minutes 25 seconds on the billy balloon popping challenge was electric billy almost threw darts at us but that was very funny it was a bad beat too because he was done at about two minutes or so yeah and then the last one was a real doozy yeah yeah uh second earlier in the show you guys chatted with paul rabel about a potential proposal. Oh.
And I'm here to say. Breaking Moose.
This is Breaking Moose. I can't do it.
Breaking Moose. Go ahead.
Go ahead, Hank. I did it.
No, really do it. That was it? What, the fucking cow doesn't want to come out of the barn anymore? What was that? It's late.
But it's for a big announcement. Well, it's not breaking.
We've fucking known for a while. Oh, that's actually true.
But, Hank, take it back. Reverse the cow.
Reverse the cow. Reverse the cow.
Reverse it. For the AWLs, breaking news.
Okay. It is happening.
July 31st, a doubleheader. I'm Peacock.
I will be doing the play-by-play. Jake on the cock.
Yes, Jake. That's a good hashtag, Jake on the cock.
Jake on the cock. Thank you, guys.
It would not be possible without all of you guys in here. Paul Rabel was a big advocate.
Dave, Erica, everyone greenlighting it. Very thankful.
Going to be fun. Waterdogs, second game.
They're playing the defending champion with Snakes. 10-15 Eastern Time.
Is this a legacy game for Jake Marks? Oh, yeah. Some kid came up to me at the Islanders game.
And he's like, Big Cat, can I get a pick? I was like, yeah, of course. And he's like, go, Dogs, go.
And I was like, what? Does he think I went to Georgia? Did Dougs coach at Georgia? And then I was like, oh, he's talking about the Water Dogs. Jake, who's going to be your partner in the booth? His name is Ryan Boyle.
Wait, what is it? Assuming it stays in place, Ryan Boyle has been called. Wait, wait, wait.
Who is it? You said it twice. I haven't heard it.
Go ahead. I'm not going to say anything.
Ryan Boyle. I'm excited to meet with him and work with him.
He's going to be great. Where do you think he went to college? Let's hope it's not.
Johns Hopkins. Let's hope it's not.
No. Princeton.
Oh, smarter than you. Yeah.
You'll have to concede that. Fine with me.

Just so you know, right out of the gate, you just have to be like, listen, I know you're

smarter than me.

Also, if there's like a backdoor play, you got to like elbow and be like, that's the

old Princeton backdoor play on there.

Broadcasters love bringing up that shit from 1997.

I'm excited.

I'm excited.

Thank you guys.

Really means a lot.

Yeah, let's make it.

July 31st, doubleheader.

Let's make it the most watched broadcast on the PLL season. Let's do that.
Yeah, the most viewed cock on the internet. Yeah, because we want Jake to keep fulfilling his dream.
We want Jake to end up one day way better than all of us. Well, that's tough to do.
You guys really suck. Shut up, Jake.
Shut the fuck up. You motherfucker.
Shut up, Jake. Shut up, Jake up, Jake.
So patronized. Shut the fuck up.
I mean it. Shut the fuck up, Jake.
Just shut up. All right, Billy.
Fire Fest. Yeah.
Oh, you're still going. That's certainly not a Fire Fest.
I thought the fact that we're going to get you and Ryan Boyle in a big beef before your broadcast was a Fire Fest. Ryan Boyle.
To your point earlier, I also got roasted for a picture, but it was because I was holding my nose as I was jumping in. And people destroyed me.
But the first few times, I jump in and water shoves up my nose. I don't want that happening.
I don't know what's so bad about that. You gotta blow out your nose when you jump in.
These people screw you for making fun of me. Jake, these are our listeners.

Yeah, I appreciate them, but I've got to stick up for myself.

It doesn't sound like you do appreciate them.

Of course I appreciate them.

People pay our bills.

They're looking out for your image.

Everything I said about watching Jake on the Peacock,

just strike that from the record.

Don't boycott this game.

He just said screw you.

Can I give you a little tip?

When you jump in a pool, just go, when you land,

and that's all you have to do.

Most of us learned that when we were like seven. But the water up their nose, it stings.
It just not be annoying. Yeah, I mean, I am, but...
Yeah. You look on Billy's face when he's like, Billy's like, there's so many things I'd like to say right now, but I know how short my leash is.
This is just the beauty of Jake, though. I love Jake because he's like, he's about to be announcing a real PLL game.
He's going to be going on to bigger and better things someday, and he's still like, that will pesky water up your nose. Yeah.
It's tough. It's the worst.
I got a prediction. I think one day Jake will be calling a national championship NBA game.
Whoa. That would be great.
The finals. He said that like four times today.
Yeah.

He was doing that to cover up the

mistakes. That one was a joke.
That's the one

you do on top of it to be like, that's the joke I'm making.

Both of them. Hybrid.
Yeah.

I think that national championship plays, by the way.

No, it definitely

doesn't when you're talking about the NBA.

100% doesn't.

Get that natty, boys. This is now the bargaining

phase of BFD. He's screwing that up.

It actually is way better that way.

Get the... He definitely doesn't when you're talking about the NBA.
100% doesn't. Get that natty, boys.
This is now the bargaining phase of BFD.

He's screwing that up. No, get that.

It actually is way better that way.

Get the natty.

This is why we play.

I said it, except it's international.

Yeah.

All right.

Championship.

Billy.

Firefest and recap.

My firefest is that when we were playing wiffle ball,

started out, dinger, first play of the game.

It was on a good ride.

Not off me.

Not off big head.

Then, about in the second inning, there was a big fly ball.

It was in right field.

No one was there.

I was in center field.

Tracked it real nice.

He was in left field.

Left field.

Tracked it real nice.

Ran out there.

Positioned myself right under the ball. But earlier in the day, we'd been playing a game.
Involved Crisco. There's a lot of Crisco in my hands.
Are you serious? And I dropped it. But that's not the worst part.
No, it's not. I struck you out.
No, that's not the worst part. But I did strike you out.
No, this is the better part. But say I struck you out.
I was pissed that I dropped it, so I was going to make up for it by throwing them out at home. Then I picked up the wiffle ball, and wiffle ball's pretty light, pretty like, you know, like not a very...
Explain wiffle ball to everyone. Shades of Manny Ramirez in left field is pretty much what I would say.

So I try to throw it, make like a nice dime.

You threw it directly into the ground.

It just went directly into the ground.

It went maybe five feet in front of you.

I gripped it a little hard.

He tried to throw it long.

He threw it down.

First time fielding that day.

We didn't warm up.

We didn't throw the ball before.

Anyway, it was just terrible.

Then I got struck out by Big Cat.

It was terrible because he kept painting the outside of the chair i thought they were all balls and uh but i didn't get that one there and no then big cat threw one down right down the middle and i hit it and it went really far but then fucking dana just like batted it to himself and so this is just a full recap of the game. No, it's just my

adventures.

This is like the live look-in

when Barry Bonds was going for

the home run record. And we saw every at-bat.

We just saw every live look-in at Billy's

at-bats. I'll give Billy this.

The throw from left field was so bad.

Spectacularly bad. It made me

fall down. It was 150 miles

an hour directly into the ground. I just wanted to get in front of that my legs gave out watching you do that it was so bad it was so bad anyway um so i made a equation for the respects the amount of respects an nba player gets after he retires oh wow so it is the the delta change in years since retirement minus 20 times championships plus Nike money divided by current weight times 1,000.
And that's how many respects you get. I actually think this makes sense.
It does. Say it one more time.
Change in years since retired. Okay.
So, for example, that would be like Charles Barkley when he retired. I don't know.
Late 90s. Let's say, yeah.
So, let's call it 22 years. Yeah.
22. Let's call it 20 years just for easy math.
20 years minus 20 is zero. Okay.
Times championships. Uh-oh.
That's also zero. Zero.
Plus Plus Nike money. A decent amount.
Probably, while he's playing, probably like... Wait, was he...
No, I don't think he was Nike. He was...
Was he Reebok? Or Converse, maybe? No, he has his own shoe. He has his own shoe.
What did you say? No, he was... It has to be Nike money.
All right. It has to be only Nike money.
Only Nike money. Because that's how Jordan fits on the refrag.
Yeah, no, he was. Because the Sir Charles commercial was Nike.
That was when he was, I'm not a role model. Divided by his current weight.
So it's like 330 pounds. So it's probably, let's say, 50 million divided by...
50 million divided by 330 times 1,000. 330 times 1,000.
Uh-huh. And that is what you're dividing five million? It says 151 million.
Why did you have to make it such high numbers? No, you times the weight by a thousand. And then that's what you divide the money by.
Oh, okay. All right, all right, all right.
I got you, I got you, I got you. So 330 times 1,000.
Okay. So what was it? 50 million divided by, okay.
He gets 1,500 respects. That seems like a good amount of respects for trust.
It's not elite. Actually, let's make it like 330 times 10 000 okay okay i mean this is all great mathematicians they don't just come up with it right away then it's 150 respects three point okay yeah but if you compare that to jordan jordan has like yeah almost a million respects more like exponentially more respect got.
Okay. Good one.
All right. I like the Billy formula.
Oh, yeah. And then what kind of writer do you guys think George R.
Martin is? Do you think he's like a drug guy? No. If he's a drug guy, it's like weird.
Like he licks a toad. Like Wormwood.
Yeah. He's a drunk writer.
He drinks mead and then writes. Yeah.
Also, do you know that Greta Griffin's last is G3 as well? I'm fucking with you. That's good one, Billy.
You got me. You got me.
I'm also alone. You're good, you.
Also, Greta's sister's name is Grit. Yeah.
And she's Olympian. Pretty crazy.
Also, you guys... Does she have a fat ass? I don't know.
Good, down to test. Yeah.
If you're not married to her, you can't say it online. If you guys are going to get down with Long Island, Long Island is a huge lacrosse hotbed.
Nope. It's huge.
I'm out. I don't like Long Island anymore.
Long Island is the biggest lacrosse hotbed. That's the worst way to sell it.
Did you listen to the Paul Rabel interview? Yeah. Those are your people.
I don't like Long Island Long Island is like the biggest lacrosse hotbed That's the worst way to sell it Those are your people I like their iced teas You're out I'm out Say no more For that reason I am out Long Island just had the greatest Shark Tank pitch to us of all time, and then the last second they just were like,

and check out this lacrosse.

And we're like, nope.

A new frog just dropped, named after Led Zeppelin.

Bonk.

Wow, what's its name?

The Led Zeppelin Rain Frog.

Oh, okay.

I thought maybe it was going to be like a Misty Mountain Hop or something,

like some cool.

Rain Song.

A good name for like a Venus a venus flytrap would be

robert plant though that'd be a badass name that would be cool okay 69 99 6 18 i'm gonna go 12 today 58 give me 12 Oh, 66!

I thought that was 99!

Fuck!

Are you serious? Oh, 66.

I thought that was 99.

Are you sure it's not?

Oh, man, it looks like 69.

Yeah.

That's a first timer, though.

All right.

66.

Scorgami.

Oh, shit.

I thought that was 99.

Those are devil numbers.

6-6.

Love you guys.