Ryan Whitney, NBA Playoffs, Don't Call Bryson Brooksy And Mayweather/Paul For Monday Reading

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Speaker 1 On today's part in my take, we have one of our, actually,

Speaker 1 I think if you do the analytics, he's the number one recurring guest, right? In terms of appearances on this show. I'm almost positive someone told me

Speaker 1 Lenny Dykstra. No, it is Ryan Whitney, one of our favorite guests.
I mean, how can you not love it? Even if you're not a hockey fan, he's a great listen. Go listen to Spit and Chiclets as well.

Speaker 1 We have Ryan Whitney. We have a ton of sports to recap.
I counted, there were like seven or eight different sports on Sunday alone that were just going on. And we have the Floyd Mayweather Jake

Speaker 1 Logan Paul.

Speaker 3 I screwed that up seven times today.

Speaker 1 Jake Paul's our guy. Logan Paul.
Logan.

Speaker 1 Logan Logang. Are you with Jake Paul?

Speaker 1 No, I think Jake Paul is our guy.

Speaker 1 I'm in favor of Jake. Logan is a pen guy.
Jake is not. Not.
Oh, okay. But Jake is the one who tweeted about me last week.

Speaker 3 Yeah, he clout chased you. Yeah, okay.

Speaker 1 Then I'm a Jake Paul. He clout trapped you.
Well, guess what? Done.

Speaker 1 I'll walk in and fucking grab that cheese every time. I'm a little fat cat.
Couldn't be me. All right.
So we'll do,

Speaker 1 we're going to do our Monday reading. It's just basically going to be us live announcing that fight.

Speaker 1 So if you missed it, if you didn't buy it, if you didn't see it on a Sunday night, we have the recap for you so you don't miss any of it. It is a packed show.
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Speaker 1 Okay, let's go.

Speaker 1 Now in the street, there is violence.

Speaker 1 And then a lot of

Speaker 1 work to be done.

Speaker 1 No place to hang out or washing.

Speaker 1 And then I can't blame all on the sun. Oh no, we're gonna ride down to

Speaker 3 It's part of my tape presented by Far School Schools.

Speaker 3 Welcome to Part of My Tape presented by Body Armor.

Speaker 1 Go get your strawberry banana right now on Amazon or in-store purchase. Today is Monday, June 7th, and Blake Griffin is back.

Speaker 1 Huge back.

Speaker 1 He was diving on the floor.

Speaker 3 He was getting the floorburn.

Speaker 1 I'm giving, dude.

Speaker 3 I'm giving the floorburn award of the week to Blake Griffin for his performance on Saturday.

Speaker 1 He out-hustled Bobby Portis. Bobby Portis is just a hustled machine.
He out-hustled him. So Blake Griffin is back.
I just, I'm happy for Blake.

Speaker 3 He flipped the switch.

Speaker 1 Yeah, we are. And also

Speaker 1 Blake Kepka's back too because Bryson DeChambeau, Let's Go Brooksy is all the way up in his head.

Speaker 3 Rent-free. But if you, if you look, well, yeah, I mean, everyone is in Brooksy's head at this point.
It's an orphanage.

Speaker 3 All the problem children of the the PGA tour and the fans are allowed to live now rent-free in Brooksey's. Are we going to just call him Brooksy for that one?

Speaker 1 Okay, so I have a question. Do we

Speaker 1 feel at all bad? No, I don't. Okay, I just want to make sure.
I want to check the temperature because I don't. No.
But I also, I've felt, I don't feel bad, but I've wondered if I should feel bad.

Speaker 3 Well, here's the thing, big cat. We're bad boys, right?

Speaker 1 Yeah, we are.

Speaker 3 We don't feel bad yet. We're the bad boys of the tour.
Bryson has fully cemented himself. His transformation now into shooter McGavin is complete.
So he's like going to the PGA tour.

Speaker 3 He's requesting that they handle it. At first, on Friday, he was like, I think it's great for golf.
It's funny.

Speaker 1 It's a kind of flattering.

Speaker 1 He said it was flattering. I'm not mad.

Speaker 3 In fact, I'm laughing. This whole thing is funny.
That lasted for about exactly one day. And then he was like, the tour needs to step in and do something about this.

Speaker 3 Like, pretty soon, he's going to have...

Speaker 3 I don't know, who's the most annoying fan? Takashi 6ix9ine in a canoe yelling at fucking Brooks Kepka when he's teeing off, calling him a jackass.

Speaker 1 That's what Bryson is going to hire?

Speaker 3 Well, I'm saying he doesn't have any friends. Oh, got it.
Takashi, he's a paycheck. Got it.

Speaker 1 Got it. So I don't know.
That's a great choice. Yeah.
Yeah. Okay.

Speaker 3 Or maybe just getting

Speaker 3 his garage.

Speaker 1 Yeah, doing cameos for him. Yeah, it'd be a real shame.

Speaker 1 Dude, stop hitting us up.

Speaker 3 It'd be a real shame if Bryson got into a business arrangement with O.J. Simpson and shorted him.

Speaker 1 So I saw Brandley Chambly. He basically called us bullies.
He was like, this is a classic case of bullies. Wait, how did you run them up?

Speaker 1 Someone tagged me, and then I went on to Youngstown Bob, my burner account, and I actually responded. I was like, just chill out, dude.
Like, it. When did he block you? Oh, a while ago.

Speaker 1 We've been blocked, hangley is. Flicks Lee's Chimbliss is not a fan of it.

Speaker 3 Listen,

Speaker 1 I feel like

Speaker 1 if we were. Well, first of all, we have not told anyone to go do anything.
No, in fact. Actually, I think I absolutely.

Speaker 3 No, quite the opposite. We said we're not.

Speaker 1 No, I 100%.

Speaker 3 We're not saying. You said no.

Speaker 1 No, I said do it.

Speaker 3 We are not saying that you should do it. But it's

Speaker 1 saying do it. And you should do it.

Speaker 3 I am saying do do it. I'm doing satire.
You should absolutely do it.

Speaker 1 Do it. That would be such a joke.

Speaker 1 But anyway, yeah, he called us bullies.

Speaker 1 And I thought about it, and I was like, okay, if people were saying mean things to Bryson DeChambeau, if they were harassing him, I would say, yeah, that is too far. Don't do that.

Speaker 1 They are literally just calling him Brooksy. They're just saying, let's go Brooksy.
They're actually cheering for him. They're giving him encouragement.

Speaker 1 They might say the wrong name, but they're giving him encouragement.

Speaker 3 I even think it's dumber than that. They're cheering for somebody else.

Speaker 1 They're not.

Speaker 1 They think it's Brooks.

Speaker 3 They're not talking about Bryson. They're just such diehard Brooks skeptic fans that they're saying, come on, Brooksy.

Speaker 3 I mean, you had guys on the PGA tour for the last like 30 years saying Baba Booy after somebody hits a shot.

Speaker 1 Get in the hole. Mashed potatoes.
What are you going to say? Hank. We did this first with Brooks.
What? Oh,

Speaker 1 Hank. Yeah, you're right.
And how do you handle it? He became our best friend. Every time he tees off, someone says the wrong name.
What a great fucking point, Hank.

Speaker 1 That Brindley Chambly, you better call us bullies for bullying Brooks, too. Right? Because we did the exact same thing.

Speaker 3 Okay, here's what.

Speaker 1 And when Phil, you know what I want? U.S. Open, call Phil Bill.
Here's what, here's what. That's just enough where people will be like, did they say Bill?

Speaker 3 Or did they say Phil? Here's what Shimbly Brixlis has to say.

Speaker 3 There is a cancer metastasizing in American sport of people who believe that buying a ticket makes them an actor in the action, not merely a spectator to it. A cancer.

Speaker 1 Imagine, and I think what he's going for here is he's basically lumping Trey Young getting spit on, Kyrie Irving getting stuff thrown at him, Russell Westbrook having a popcorn dumped on him, with a bunch of fucking drunk guys just saying, let's go Brooksy.

Speaker 1 Yes.

Speaker 1 And the fact is, fucking pussy.

Speaker 3 He brought it on himself.

Speaker 1 God damn it.

Speaker 3 He absolutely 100%.

Speaker 3 Because this thing,

Speaker 3 no one was talking about, but that video came out of somebody saying, let's go, Brooksy, and him trying to get them thrown out.

Speaker 3 And then he had the nerve, the audacity to say that Brooks was, no, that he was living rent-free in Brooks's house.

Speaker 1 And

Speaker 3 then he gets shocked that people actually take him up.

Speaker 1 We all thought it was fake at one point on Friday. Yeah, I did too.
I totally did because it was from a random person. It was like, wait, we should make sure that we're correct on this.

Speaker 1 I still,

Speaker 1 in my heart of hearts, and I know that.

Speaker 1 Guys like Branley Chambly are like old school and shout out our guys at Foreplay because they're new school and they they know that golf should be fun and they preach that but that's really what it comes down to is like golf should be fun rivalries are fun having guys hate each other is fun being able to hate another golfer as a fan is fun like all of these things make watching golf more enjoyable and grows the game you cannot tell me otherwise running your playing partner over with a golf cart for a video not fun not fun officially i love that was that was a crazy month remember that no i pft PFD, do I remember?

Speaker 1 I'm glad that I watched every video.

Speaker 3 I'm glad everyone pulled back on it because someone was going to die.

Speaker 1 As you know, I like injuries and puke videos, and that was one of my best months of my life. And then don't do it.

Speaker 3 But then there was the other actual on-the-course news, which was John Rahm. Yeah, oh, that was getting pulled aside.

Speaker 1 That was gonna be my who's back, but yes, coronavirus. Coronavirus is back because I fuck.

Speaker 3 Just when fans were back, coronavirus.

Speaker 1 See, credit to John Rahm because he tried to outrun science. And I, not to get political here, guys, but uh, he

Speaker 1 he apparently was with someone who had coronavirus earlier in the week and then rushed to get the first vaccine being like this will work well yeah he he treated it like the vax was hydroxychloroquine yeah no he treated no he treated it like it was plan b yeah yeah exactly he's like oh i'm pregnant i gotta go take a pill yeah like oh i oh my dick itches gotta run rub some cream on i'll sweat this out real quick yeah this will work this will the herpes won't hit if i just take a hot bath and so it was it was really awkward when they were telling him what on that green like hey, guess what?

Speaker 3 Congratulations on obviously winning this tournament. You're up by how many strokes? Like six strokes? He was up by six strokes.
You're joining Sunday,

Speaker 3 but you got the cocoa. And he just kind of broke down.
And then there was a lot of people being like, you should find a different place to tell him that.

Speaker 3 I understand why those people said that because it was weird. But also, if you knew that he had coronavirus, then he's like walking into the clubhouse and he's like, high five and everybody.

Speaker 1 It would have been sense. So

Speaker 1 I don't understand why the PGA wasn't like, hey, dude, you have coronavirus. We'll see you at 7 a.m.
tomorrow. Play 18.
Put your score in, and then we'll, you know, like leave.

Speaker 3 Play on your, you have coronavirus. Tell you what.
Play with Patrick Reeve.

Speaker 1 No, but

Speaker 1 he's already played with his caddy all day. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Like, you come out early. No fans are out here yet.
Play your 18. We'll put in your score.
And that's an easy solution. I don't know why they didn't work around it at all.

Speaker 1 I don't know why they could have just figured out a way for him to play.

Speaker 1 I just, I also, I mean, if you have like that much at stake, if you're John Rahm, like you probably should have just gotten the vaccine earlier because like you could have had this happen.

Speaker 1 The whole thing will seem like a mess. It's poorly handled.

Speaker 3 Yeah, so he obviously knew that he screwed up, which is why he went to go get the vaccine after the vaccine.

Speaker 3 He tried to turn back time and chase down the fact that he obviously knew that he had messed up, that he should have gotten it. But yeah, I don't know if you're the PGA and that happens.

Speaker 3 Are you going to make a different set of rules for everybody? Yeah, I don't know why.

Speaker 1 But the guy was six strokes up. I still don't understand why he couldn't

Speaker 1 have played at 7.30 in the morning and just been like put in his score.

Speaker 3 Does he get paid or is it just

Speaker 3 $0 disqualified? I'm not sure what happened with that.

Speaker 1 But that was crazy. That was crazy.

Speaker 3 All right, so that's golf. How'd Homer do?

Speaker 3 He actually did okay. He was threatening.

Speaker 1 I think.

Speaker 3 Vax Homer. You know, he's not getting that Coco.
No.

Speaker 1 Hell no.

Speaker 1 I think he did okay.

Speaker 1 Okay is a very relative thing. Well, no, he was playing on Sunday, so he did okay.
T6. T6.
T6 points. T6.
That's points. Yeah, that is points.

Speaker 1 Wait,

Speaker 3 I just realized we're heading for a collision course where it's going to be Bryson, excuse me, Brooksie and Brooks.

Speaker 1 No, Blake.

Speaker 3 Brooksey and Blake playing together on the Ryder Cup.

Speaker 1 Possibly, yes.

Speaker 3 That will be amazing. And then Patrick Reed's going to dominate everybody.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 Because that's what he does. Yes.
Yes.

Speaker 1 I mean, it's good for golf. I'm excited for the U.S.
Open in two weeks.

Speaker 1 All right, let's talk some hoops. So we did have the Nets, Bucs, game one.
James Harden got hurt like 10 seconds in the game. I was at the game.

Speaker 1 I have a couple notes that I wanted to share with you guys.

Speaker 3 All right, so it's not a hamstring injury. What is it?

Speaker 1 No, no, not that. I actually didn't get there in time for that.

Speaker 3 I actually think he might have gout because we stopped talking about his weight for a long time.

Speaker 1 Fat bodies do get hamstrings.

Speaker 3 The hamstrings are. That's just a fact.

Speaker 1 So Blake is awesome. He also wears these huge warmers on his knees when he's sitting on the bench that makes him look like the bionic man, which is pretty cool.

Speaker 3 Are there like the things that Jay Glazer had at his workout studio where you just put your feet into these giant things and use those tubes right there?

Speaker 1 They're enormous. What's going on? There's a Pokemon card necklace.
Oh, okay. That's Logan.
That's Christ. The Charizard.
That's Logan. That's Logan.

Speaker 1 All right, so we're going to have that as our Monday reading. So make sure you listen to the whole show.
We have the whole fight. Got to catch them all.
All right, so...

Speaker 1 So that was, so Blake was awesome.

Speaker 1 Kyrie Irving, I have something really bad to tell you, Hank, but everyone on that team fucking loves him.

Speaker 3 Well, we know Kevin Durant does. You see them snuggle.
No, they all love him. That was really in the huddle.

Speaker 1 They all love him.

Speaker 3 You have a lot of shit for the snuggle. I thought that was cute when they snuggle.

Speaker 1 No, they love him. They love him.
He is like. Well, he said it's Brooklyn versus the World.
A1.

Speaker 1 No, Brooklyn and the World versus Everyone. I also think that's the first time.
I think he tried to say that the whole world is rooting for the Nets.

Speaker 3 Then that's not everyone.

Speaker 1 I'll get the exact quote, but he was basically implying that he feels like everyone in the world is rooting for the Nets. They love him.
They love him.

Speaker 1 He's like the number one teammate, the guy that everyone looks to. I was thinking about it more, though.

Speaker 1 And I think it's partially, I don't know what he is as a teammate, but in terms of his game, because he was so good.

Speaker 1 I think Kyrie Irving has the number one, if you could like pick which game you could have, if you're any NBA player, you'd pick Kyrie Irving.

Speaker 3 Oh, it's sick.

Speaker 1 Because his handles are incredible. He's like, his finishing at the rim.

Speaker 1 Remember when we went to that game, the Cavs versus Celtics in the Eastern Conference Final, and Kyrie scored like 18 straight points, and we were just sitting sitting there in awe tonight you lost your wall.

Speaker 3 That's where I left my wallet SEQ.

Speaker 1 Yeah, he's just so goddamn good. And then the other note I had was Kevin Durant is way more bald than we realize.

Speaker 3 Yeah, and I always think that it's the angle on TV because the lights hit from directly on the top.

Speaker 1 It's bad.

Speaker 3 You know how it's like basketball players and then anybody that's sitting on the sidelines of a football game, football coaches always get the worst possible angle directly at the crown of their head.

Speaker 3 Yeah. And so Nick Saban, I mean, he looks bad like up there now, but even 20 years ago, you're like, he's balding with Kevin.
It's worse. It's bad.
That's tough. So, I'm sorry.

Speaker 1 Sorry, where was he still balding? What was the other thing you were saying?

Speaker 3 Well, with Kyrie, I just love his finishing around the hoop because he always figures out a way. He never shoots like a normal one-handed layup.
He always puts spin on the ball one way or the other.

Speaker 3 And his body just becomes one with the backboard and understands which way the ball is going to bounce and exactly how much to put off.

Speaker 3 One time I said that he has, like, he's more accurate within seven feet of the hoop than I am wiping my own butt. Yeah.
He's so crazy good.

Speaker 3 He's probably, if there was a layup contest, he would win every year.

Speaker 1 Yeah, and he's, in like, if you just talk about one-on-one ability, he can beat anyone because he can just take anyone off the dribble.

Speaker 1 So I think that adds to like the respect factor and just like, hey, this guy is, you know, I really do, it was weird.

Speaker 1 I guess I knew it, but watching it happen, like people would go, everyone was going up to him during timeouts, talking to him. I just think they love him.
So sorry, Hank.

Speaker 3 Do you actually think that he would win? Because I agree with you. I think that if there was like a bracket one-on-one tournament in the NBA, I think that Kyrie would probably win.
Yeah, probably.

Speaker 1 I mean, you know, obviously with like size, I don't know if like would

Speaker 1 I like Giannis is so fucking big.

Speaker 3 Could you just back him down?

Speaker 1 Yeah, I don't know. But like, yeah, if you're just, if you did it approximate size or position, yes.
I think so. Luca would probably, actually, Luca would might win.
He might win. Luca.

Speaker 1 I mean, you can't, like...

Speaker 1 They lost, but he did everything he could. Yeah.

Speaker 1 What was the Giselle? Tom can't throw in, catch the ball. Yeah, Luke can't.
That's how it felt for him.

Speaker 3 Luke can't shoot and rebound.

Speaker 1 Yeah, and do everything.

Speaker 3 And he probably would have had, would he finish with like 12, 13 assists? I think he had double-digit assists. He would have had a lot more if his teammates were better at shooting the ball.

Speaker 1 I also,

Speaker 1 I don't know if you saw his post-game, but he was wearing a backpack, and he looked like he was like 12 years old. So he's trying to fight back against your theory.
Yeah, he heard. He heard.
Yes.

Speaker 1 It was ridiculous. He would have a ridiculous look.

Speaker 3 He would win the seniors bracket of the one-on-one tournament.

Speaker 3 One more thing about Luca. Did you see after the game playoff Pete went up to him and tried to do a jersey swap? And Luca was like, no, I'm good.
I'm good. It's okay.

Speaker 3 Apparently what happened was, and I kind of thought that this might be happening because Luca,

Speaker 3 he's a big boy. Yeah.

Speaker 3 Big man. He's a little doughy, you might say.
Thick caner medley is what I'm calling him. He went to his locker room and he did the jersey swap after the fact

Speaker 1 away from the the camera so nobody had to see Luca take his shirt off like he was a big guy at the pool well I also like that Luca has that in his back pocket because he is incredible uh you could make you know whatever you want to say top five top seven uh nba player right now he's incredible and he still has the uh summer where he gets in shape and everyone's like luca lost 15 pounds of fat and gained five pounds of muscle watch out

Speaker 1 storyline in his like back pocket which i think that's the greatest thing you can do as an athlete is start your career, be great, but be a little doughy so that you know you can always be like, well, I could just get in shape.

Speaker 1 Like Luca,

Speaker 1 he just looks at me like, dude, if I was in shape, I'd probably win this game seven.

Speaker 3 Yeah, he's going to show up one offseason like very vascular. Right.
You'll see a lot of veins.

Speaker 3 But then at that point, if he doesn't win, he always has in his back pocket, I'm going to put my mask back on. I've lost some of my power game losing some of that weight.

Speaker 3 And then he can get fat over the course of the season.

Speaker 1 So

Speaker 1 someone pointed out, people have been pointing out, and

Speaker 1 I'm not pointing it out, but playoff P won a series in the Staples Center before LeBron?

Speaker 3 Yeah, no, it's actually just a fact.

Speaker 1 It's not so. That's what it is.

Speaker 3 When we say that, big cat, we're not saying it as an indictment on the page. No, no, no, no.

Speaker 3 It's just a fact that playoff L

Speaker 3 got a dub in the Staples Center before LeBron James did.

Speaker 1 No, no, playoff, wait, you call him Playoff L?

Speaker 3 Yeah, that's what his name used to be. No, now he's playing off.

Speaker 1 That's LeBron's name now. Playoff L?

Speaker 3 L, yeah.

Speaker 1 Hell yeah.

Speaker 1 Playoff B is

Speaker 1 Paul George.

Speaker 3 Can LeBron James win the playoffs?

Speaker 1 Yeah, playoff L. He can.
As of right now in the staples center, he is playoff L. Well, L.A.

Speaker 3 is a Clippers town. Make no mistake about it.
Right now, Big Cat, town's going nuts for them. Them and the Chargers.

Speaker 1 We have been decidedly chosen to be a sons podcast in the West. Yes.
We are a Blake Griffin,

Speaker 1 which is, I guess, like the vessel of the Nets. We're rooting for for Blake Griffin through the vessel of the Nets.

Speaker 1 So in the East. Now,

Speaker 1 I wouldn't be shocked if the Clippers, especially the way they won this series, down 2-0 and then down 3-2,

Speaker 1 they might just fuck around and go to the finals now.

Speaker 3 It would be very funny if they did. Right.
Like this is the year that the Clippers put it all together. They just needed to win one.
Yeah. I mean, they got

Speaker 1 one last year, but they needed to win one. Well, this one was different.
Yeah.

Speaker 3 Because it felt like this one was spiraling out of control because they had already like that baggage that people were talking about with them. Like they're choke artists.

Speaker 3 This team has to be blown up. And they kind of overcame that in the first round.
So that first round victory kind of felt like it was worth two series. Yeah.

Speaker 1 In a weird way. And

Speaker 1 the rare sea, the series doesn't start or end until a team wins at home. Series doesn't end until a team wins at home.
That was the first home game win of the series, which is very rare to watch.

Speaker 1 But it was a great series.

Speaker 1 The other one we had was the Sixers and the Hawks started. Now, I got, Hank, I got on the wrong side of Philly Twitter.
I made the joke. So when the Sixers.
Oh, no. There's no...
You probably started

Speaker 1 a regular question, yeah. Well, no, I was.

Speaker 1 Maybe the most sensitive. No, I trolled.
I knew. It was a lot of the, to the credit of Philly Twitter, a lot of the Philly Twitter was like, I know what you're doing.
That's okay.

Speaker 1 When the Sixers were down like 30 in the first half and Joe Embiid was was playing, I said, just wait until Joel Embiid comes back, then the Hawks will be in trouble.

Speaker 1 And some people were like, oh, kill yourself. Not many, so I'm going to give it a pass.
But I do have a problem with Joel Embiid. I love Joel Embiid.

Speaker 1 When you come out with Triple H and do the DX sucket before the game, you have to win that game.

Speaker 3 He was also jumping around a lot on that knee or back, whichever side you fall on. He was doing a lot of pregame motions.
Like, it looked like it was a violent act.

Speaker 1 Did you watch it? I did see it.

Speaker 3 Well, I saw the GIF, and that's what's going to follow him around: is the GIF of him doing the sucket, Triple H coming up from behind him, you never

Speaker 3 suck another man's sucket, the two-handed sucket, and then they were ringing the bell and all that stuff.

Speaker 1 You have to win that! Say what you want about Philly basketball, dude. They don't win playoff games, but they put on a great show at that time.
Okay, now you're again, all kill yourself tweets.

Speaker 1 Please go directly to Hank. It's true.
They do this pregame show. They bring the players out like they're the fucking Harlem Globetrotters.

Speaker 1 Like, what other stadium do you see the pregame players humping DX? I love it. It was awesome, but you have to win it.
Like, who does that? Who else does that? You have to win that game.

Speaker 3 You got to agree. You got to at least make sure that you're healthy before you do that.

Speaker 1 And he was. He scored like 39.

Speaker 3 You can't do it on like Is Joelle and Beat Healthy Night. Yeah.
You got to do it when you know for sure that you're going to get a dub. But Trey Young, I love Trey Young.
He's so good.

Speaker 3 Trey Young loves to be hated. Yes.
He's like the official

Speaker 1 NBA right now. He has a different

Speaker 1 dance for every type of move that he puts down on the other team.

Speaker 3 No,

Speaker 3 I don't think he's happy unless people are mad at him.

Speaker 1 Yes.

Speaker 1 I pose the question, maybe he's just better than everyone because he's just doing this. And I know obviously the Knicks were flawed, but the Sixers are the one seed.
It is only game one.

Speaker 1 I do expect the Sixers to come back and win game two. And the fourth quarter defense press ahead going.
Looked like an AAU game. Yes.
It looked like a high school game where the team just couldn't.

Speaker 1 get the ball past half quarter. I also think you'll see Ben Simmons on Trey Young for the majority of the second game, which will be a problem.

Speaker 1 I think he said his quote was like, I'm just going to be 6'10 to him. Or it's like,

Speaker 1 I'm 6'10. He's not.
I'm going to be 6'10.

Speaker 1 That's intimidating.

Speaker 3 The fourth quarter, if you're an Atlanta sports fan, you were not comfortable at the end of the fourth quarter. Yeah, now they dropped at like 17 and then they cut it to four at the very end.

Speaker 3 It felt like I went back and I looked at the win probability chart because we know that that's an actual statistical model.

Speaker 1 It always works. Always.

Speaker 3 But it had it at like 99.9. Then it dipped down to about 81.
But when it was at 81, it honestly felt 50-50. That's just Atlanta sports.

Speaker 3 It should be graded on the curve for any Atlanta sports team. But yeah, it is actually a classic case of the game just wasn't long enough for the Sixers to win.

Speaker 1 Right, right. They ran out of time.
They didn't lose. They just ran out of time.

Speaker 1 Either way, it was, I think this round is going to be awesome. I'm just excited for it.
And we're going to talk some hockey with Ryan Whitney, so don't get upset.

Speaker 1 Hockey fans, we have a lot of hockey talk coming up, 30 minutes of it. Yeah.
Great series going on. We're watching hockey as well.

Speaker 1 The fucking Habs, man. Can you believe that shit?

Speaker 3 Habs. Man, the Canadiens.
People got mad at the way that we pronounced Canadian.

Speaker 3 Canadiens.

Speaker 1 No, I say Canadien.

Speaker 3 Canadiens. Canadiens.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I say Canadiens. Habs.
Someone's like, we got to teach you how to say it. What am I saying wrong? Canadiens.
Les abéton. Yeah, there you go.

Speaker 1 All right, before we talk some other stuff, we're going to talk a little F1 and PLL.

Speaker 1 And then we have Who's Back coming up.

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Speaker 1 Okay, let's talk PLL real quick. We, um,

Speaker 1 is it PMT out? Do we, are we the worst owners in the league because our team fucking sucks? And I know, like, nice guys, like the coach, whatever. Our team sucks.
I watched the game. We suck.

Speaker 3 I think

Speaker 3 we got to find a scapegoat. We got to find a fall guy.
Coach. The goach.

Speaker 1 Dude, we had a power play where we didn't shoot.

Speaker 3 Is it he who's not here?

Speaker 1 Billy Football. Billy out.

Speaker 3 Billy out. Should we kick Billy out of the ownership group?

Speaker 1 Let's take a vote. Let's take a vote.

Speaker 3 All those who are not in favor of kicking Billy out of our lacrosse ownership group, say a racial slur.

Speaker 1 Oh, Jake.

Speaker 3 Okay, so Jake had it on his lips. So we're all in favor of his own.

Speaker 1 He had it on his lips. I'm not an owner.
Yeah, you are.

Speaker 1 No, you are. You're governor.
Yeah, you. That's what it is.
Yeah. Oh.

Speaker 1 All right, so buyer. Yeah, you just said Jake Wilder.
What did I do?

Speaker 3 So Byron, you said the O-word. Yeah, you can't say it.
Four to one vote. Billy's out.

Speaker 1 Sorry, Billy. Good call, eh? All right, now we're going to turn it around real quick.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 All right.

Speaker 3 So. But there wasn't this.

Speaker 1 You know, we suck. Yeah, we suck, though.

Speaker 1 Listen, for all the Water Dog fans that are listening just for this moment,

Speaker 1 I have nothing to say but the fact that we suck. I wish I could do a Jerry Jones press conference in the bowels of Foxborough Stadium and be like, we fucking suck.
I want everyone fired. Everyone out.

Speaker 3 Is there any radio station in America that does like a lacrosse roundup?

Speaker 1 I will call in.

Speaker 1 We'll call in. And we'll be like, yeah, we suck.

Speaker 3 Yeah, listen, we are bad.

Speaker 1 We are so bad. I was a little confused.
They got to figure out. It was like 10 to 1.
They got to figure out how the ABA championships still count for the NBA.

Speaker 1 The Boston Cannons are an institution in lacrosse, and they're talking about how today was their first win ever. Oh, yeah.
Oh, yeah, yeah. But in the new format.

Speaker 1 Have we even won it? I need to get that real. The Water Dogs?

Speaker 1 Yeah, we won last year. This is Open World.
Weren't we last placed last year?

Speaker 3 We were not. We were somewhere in the middle.

Speaker 1 Listen, Paul Rabel's coming on the show in a couple weeks. I'm going to ask him, like, dude, are you doing this?

Speaker 1 Are you fucking with us?

Speaker 3 It wasn't.

Speaker 1 Did you just give us all the bad players?

Speaker 3 It wasn't asking for me.

Speaker 1 Sorry to Gunner and Connor and Lance Belley. All you guys.
You're trying hard. Yeah.
None of that was directed towards you.

Speaker 1 Chris Hogan was doing interviews, but he's not playing.

Speaker 1 I don't understand that. Listen.
You don't think he made a team.

Speaker 3 Right now, I think he's a fan of the player.

Speaker 1 Why was he at the stadium doing interviews? It's from the top down.

Speaker 3 It's not about the guy that's relevant. They're playing hard, but they can get him on a team.

Speaker 1 Are they playing hard? Yeah. Get him on the wall.
Shoot on a power play. Should we get Chris Hogan? Yes.

Speaker 3 Yes. I think we should.
But it's like if you sent a six-year-old to Whole Foods and you're like, go cook me a souffle, they'd come back and they'd just make like paste out of their diarrhea.

Speaker 3 So it's our fault as owners.

Speaker 1 Excuse me,

Speaker 1 six.

Speaker 3 Six-year-old?

Speaker 1 What?

Speaker 3 What do you mean? A six-year-old would poop into a panel? I don't know how kids work. I don't know.
Okay, go ahead. Go on.
I don't know. We can do a child development podcast as well.

Speaker 3 But what I'm getting at, I'm trying to take ownership.

Speaker 3 i'm trying to take responsibility yeah yeah for all the issues that we're having and it's not it's not the players don't don't tell the players to kys no no one should wait i didn't say that you said that i said don't right yes no we should we should kys we should ky

Speaker 1 yeah water dogs are not in last place Oh, we aren't? Atlas

Speaker 1 lost their own ones here, but they were last year. Gold differential of minus 12.
Water dogs lost by six.

Speaker 1 Cool.

Speaker 3 All right, but there is a this league moment in the PLL this week, and it was pretty, it was pretty ridiculous. So, uh, one of their guys got their finger bit off by another guy.

Speaker 3 Both guys are suspended by the PLL.

Speaker 3 So, uh, the guy on the chrome, Matt Gaudet, got his fingertip bitten off in a hotel room fight, hotel lobby fight, by Austin Stats. So, he's on the chaos.
It was a chaos versus Chrome.

Speaker 3 They're like the Raven Steelers, I guess, in this situation.

Speaker 3 But it's over a beef out of last year because Gaudet was talking shit to the Chaos goalie whose name Blaise Reardon.

Speaker 1 We need that guy.

Speaker 3 That got caught on a hot mic during the game. So it's a little spillover from the bubble year.

Speaker 3 And as lacrosse fights typically go, someone got their finger bitten off at the end of it.

Speaker 3 And the dude with his finger hanging off, he took a video of it, and it's all over the internet. It's pretty fucking gnarly.
Wait, I want to watch it.

Speaker 3 It's not a video of the biting. It's a video of the aftermath of the biting biting where the tip's gone.
It looks like he got circumcised.

Speaker 1 La Crosse

Speaker 1 bite.

Speaker 3 Finger? Look up

Speaker 3 Matt Gaudette. M-A-T-T-G-A-U-D-E-T.

Speaker 3 Finger.

Speaker 3 Finger. Matt Gaudette finger.

Speaker 1 Hold on. Let's see.
Look at that bloody list. Oh, I like it.
Yeah, I like it. It passes my test.
Yeah. That's fucking gross.
Yeah. Oh, yeah.

Speaker 1 People are definitely going to be mad that we made them Google that.

Speaker 1 Oh, yeah. He totally got his finger bitten off.

Speaker 3 You have to ask if this is. Wait, that guy is good for LaCrosse?

Speaker 1 Is he not on our team?

Speaker 3 No, neither one of the guys.

Speaker 1 Because he looks out of shape, so I assumed he was on our team.

Speaker 3 But

Speaker 3 is it good for lacrosse? I say yes.

Speaker 1 I'm sorry. I'm a water dog till I die.
I know how you can get interested.

Speaker 1 They got me on a game. Oh, good point.
Yeah, good point. Daniel watched.
Yeah, okay. All right.

Speaker 1 So, Paul Raybo, if this is an experiment to see how bad you can make our team, at least let Jake comment it. right? Commentate.
Comment.

Speaker 1 Comment by play. Play broadcast.
Play by play.

Speaker 3 I really appreciate that opportunity, Paul.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 1 Do you think it's a problem, though, because you're

Speaker 1 an owner?

Speaker 3 Because of your past using certain words.

Speaker 1 I will be down the middle. Okay.

Speaker 1 NBC neutral. Neutral.
50-50. Yes.
All right. Yeah.
Let's get Jake on a broadcast. Start that hashtag.
Get Jake on a broadcast slash PMT out.

Speaker 1 We need to be.

Speaker 3 That contradicts each other.

Speaker 1 Yeah,

Speaker 1 that's true. But who cares? That's the duality of life.
All right. F1.

Speaker 1 What a race.

Speaker 3 Incredible.

Speaker 1 We want to interview more F1 people in Detroit on this weekend. So can someone please help us out? Danny Ricardo.

Speaker 3 Yeah, someone tell Danny Ricardo.

Speaker 1 I want to interview Tony Pole Wolf.

Speaker 1 We need to nag Danny Ricardo. People got to be like, you won't go on.

Speaker 1 We got to get the rumor that Danny Ricardo is too scared to come on PMT.

Speaker 1 Someone listening to this right now knows someone who works on the Netflix show or works on the Netflix show.

Speaker 1 And what would be better than having a couple of middle-aged podcasters do a cameo on the not

Speaker 1 actual cameo, fuck those people, a cameo on the Netflix show

Speaker 1 interviewing F1 superstars.

Speaker 3 I don't think

Speaker 3 I don't think that Daniel Ricardo would be in there. No, I don't think so.

Speaker 1 And neither would Toto.

Speaker 3 Well, Danny's like, he's a little scared. He's not really, he's afraid that he's going to say the wrong thing kind of a person.

Speaker 3 So then, because if he says the wrong thing about another driver, he'd have to back it up physically. And you know that he doesn't think that he can do that.
So

Speaker 3 I think that it's a fool's errand even trying to ask.

Speaker 1 Yeah, all right. You're probably right.
It was stupid for us to even try.

Speaker 1 The USA-Mexico game has been way better than this fight. VARC.
We got the fight coming up. We have the fight coming up.

Speaker 1 It was terrible, but we have it coming up. That's time traveling.

Speaker 3 That's a penalty, big cat. That's a penalty.

Speaker 1 But you can't say that because when we talked during the other part.

Speaker 3 I got 100 on my referee test.

Speaker 3 That is 100% a penalty. That should be a penalty kick.
And that should be us winning the

Speaker 3 CONCACAF Nations League Championship.

Speaker 1 We usually go for it. No, there's like tenant where it's like they went for it and they failed miserably.

Speaker 1 This is not.

Speaker 1 Yeah, all right. Let's get back on track.
Okay. All right.

Speaker 1 Other things from this weekend.

Speaker 1 College baseball.

Speaker 1 I actually watched some of it, and I have to say, college baseball celebrations are the best thing in sports.

Speaker 1 I don't know why it took me so long to get into it. I'm going to give my credit to our guy, Mincey.
Did you see the Tennessee walk-off?

Speaker 3 The Tennessee walk-off was cool, but I've always been a fan of old Miss games where they just literally throw beer up into the air after every home run.

Speaker 3 That's the coolest celebration that you can have in sports. It doesn't matter what game it is, what the venue is.

Speaker 3 If you just get thousands of people at the same time throwing their beer into the air, nothing can top that. It's the coolest.

Speaker 1 It's awesome. So we got to go to Omaha sometime.
We got to do that.

Speaker 1 Some summer.

Speaker 1 This week we're trying to go to F1 for Detroit. All right.
Anything else before we get to Who's Back? And then we have Ryan Whitney coming up.

Speaker 3 We're going to do any Julio in the Who's Back.

Speaker 1 Oh, yeah.

Speaker 3 Because Julio talked, Julio, our long national nightmare is over. Julio Jones has finally been traded to the Tennessee Titans.

Speaker 3 Credit goes to Adam Schefter for reporting that Diana Rossini, our friend, reported it first.

Speaker 1 We make fun of Schefter for a lot of things.

Speaker 1 This was

Speaker 1 Schefter was in the zone in terms of technicalities.

Speaker 1 So Schefter's favorite thing to do is basically have someone else break something, and then he's like, well, I added a technicality, so have it be broken by both of us.

Speaker 1 The exact tweet that was tweeted out was breaking. The Falcons are expected to trade Julio Jones to the Titans in the next 24 to 48 hours.
Sources tell Diana ESPN.

Speaker 1 The teams are discussing whether the package will be a second and a fifth round pick pick or a second round pick with swap of other picks, sources tell Adam Schefter.

Speaker 1 And then a big bold font, breaking news from Adam Schefter.

Speaker 3 I like to think that Adam

Speaker 3 created that Photoshop himself.

Speaker 1 And I like Schefter personally.

Speaker 3 I do too, but

Speaker 1 this is, Shefty, you have to be embarrassed for yourself that you tried to hop on the credit train here because all you said was they're discussing what the compensation is going to be, which that happens in every trace.

Speaker 3 And that's also what she said in her initial tweet. They're still hammering out the final conversation.
But then here's what he added on his initial tweet. You remember when it was Adrian Peterson?

Speaker 3 Yeah. And the goal of the agreement will be that he will play both years.
That was his extra nugget. And this one is his belief.

Speaker 1 They just gave a red card to a coach.

Speaker 1 Nice. Okay, go ahead.
Sorry.

Speaker 1 Sorry, Hank. Sorry, sorry, sorry.

Speaker 3 He said, but the belief is the agreement will get done.

Speaker 3 That was the extra nugget that he added in was we think that the trade that we just announced is going to happen is in fact going to happen and all i'll say is just like if i were adam shafter i would be very very i would not show my face in the bronx because diana's dad will beat the shit out of me yep yep and doug marone went to high school with him yeah all right so that was yeah julio i seems like a no-brainer for the titans seems like a no-brainer for both teams i think it's probably because the falcons julio would have walked after this year right uh he could have walked so could have walked probably would have walked yeah he would have walked after this year if he was still on the falcons He might walk on the Titans.

Speaker 3 They might try to extend him. But I think I figured out what Mike Vrabel's strategy is here.
Because Julio, he's a little bit older, but I think I know how Mike Vrabel is building this team.

Speaker 3 He's just trying to get the biggest dudes that he can possibly get his hands on.

Speaker 3 I think that he has the biggest starting 11, like just mass-wise. He is Billy Football as a coach.
He just wants... He wants pounds.
Yes. And Julio Jones is a massive dude.

Speaker 3 He's still really good at wide receiver. But I'm pretty sure that if you, he might pick up Eddie Lacey to be their backup running back this year because he's just obsessed with girth.

Speaker 1 Yeah, the Derrick Henry, like Julio Jones, Corey Davis, A.J. Brown, like that, it's just insane.
Yeah. It's insane.
So

Speaker 1 it feels like a no-brainer for the Titans. He's a freak.
It's crazy that they got him, but you still can't stop anyone on third down. Right.

Speaker 1 So your defense is still the thing I would be most worried about. But you should be excited if you're a Titans fan.

Speaker 3 If If I'm Will Compton, I'm just, I'm eating all summer long. Just get bigger, Will.

Speaker 1 Yes. Just get massive.
Yes.

Speaker 3 If you show up, if you show up in August, I know you're not on the team, but you can probably just show up and they'll let you in. Your card probably still works.

Speaker 3 If you just show up and you weigh 265 pounds, Rage is going to be like, that dude's a thumper. Yep.

Speaker 1 We got to add him on.

Speaker 1 It's like the scene, it's like the office when they all got in the weight together. Yeah, wear fast.

Speaker 1 Yeah. He just wants to make sure that the team weighs more than like 30,000 pounds.

Speaker 3 I actually bet that if Will wanted to, he could just get someone who's really good at Photoshop to just make pictures of him look 30 pounds heavier. Yeah.

Speaker 3 And Mike, that'll be good enough for Mike to bring you back.

Speaker 1 Yes, absolutely. All right.
Anything else?

Speaker 1 Let's get to who's back. Let's get to who's back.

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Speaker 1 Okay,

Speaker 1 Hank, who's back? My first who's back, I got a couple is Hezbollah.

Speaker 1 We haven't really talked about him on the show. Oh, the little dude? Yes.
Yeah. I feel like it's something that's been

Speaker 1 talked about. Hezbollah.

Speaker 3 Yeah, it kind of sounded like you were saying Hezbollah.

Speaker 1 I don't know what that. Yeah.

Speaker 3 Okay. No, we don't.
We know. You don't.

Speaker 1 Go ahead. Oh, he's the talk of the town.
Everyone's talking about fights. They want, you know, Logan versus Mayweather, but everyone wants this kid fighting.
He's kind of like the

Speaker 1 king of promotion. He's 18.
He's 18. Is it the Andy Milanakis thing? Yeah, but like 10 times.

Speaker 3 He looks like he's, what, a year and a half, two years old? Yeah.

Speaker 1 Well, that was how it started was that video of him punching the guy in the face. I was like, oh, it's a little baby.
Turns out he's like an 18-year-old, you know.

Speaker 3 Got it. And so who are they having him fight?

Speaker 1 Another TikTok kid with with a similar condition who's from a different country. I don't want to say off the top of my head because I don't know for sure.

Speaker 1 That's awesome. Turkey or something.

Speaker 3 I think it's probably one of the stands.

Speaker 1 He's so funny. Yeah,

Speaker 1 he's got so much swag.

Speaker 1 Yeah, but I figured we should talk about him. It's something I see people talking about all the time, so I just wanted to bring him into the show.
My other who's back is Magic.

Speaker 1 Oh, that's all my who's backs are getting taken. All right.
You do it. You do it.
Matt Johnson? Yeah.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 Coronavirus got taken too.

Speaker 3 Do you possess?

Speaker 1 No, no, no. But I just, I had two who's backs.
I had a backup. Go ahead.
You do it. I have no, no, no, no.

Speaker 1 That's it. No, I actually only had one because it's who's back.
I don't want to be a try-hard. There we go.
Thank you.

Speaker 1 Wow. Go ahead.

Speaker 3 Go ahead, Peter. Hank, you always have more than one.

Speaker 1 No.

Speaker 3 I usually just have more. Who's one back?

Speaker 1 Right?

Speaker 3 My who's back of the week is Simone Biles. I got Simone Biles coming back.
She participated in some sort of gymnastics event tonight.

Speaker 3 And all I know about it was she started her routine off with two separate moves that are both called the biles that

Speaker 3 no one else can even do. Okay.
They're like the hardest moves ever invented. But it's bile.
But Simone Biles.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I know. But they're called the Biles.

Speaker 3 Well, she has two different bile moves. Right.
The Bile one, the Bile two. Got it.
And so she was. Is she the goat?

Speaker 1 She, I don't know. Nadia Komenich.
She's probably the...

Speaker 3 Nadia Komenich is pretty good.

Speaker 3 Gabby Douglas.

Speaker 1 Gabby Douglas. Wait, is that her? Wait, hold on.

Speaker 3 Carrie Struggle. Michaela Maroney.

Speaker 1 Who was the one who curt her ankle?

Speaker 3 Carrie Struggle. Yeah.
No, is that Kerry?

Speaker 1 Who pretty much broke her ankle? No, was that Kerry Struggle?

Speaker 3 Yeah. Yeah.
Yeah, Carrie Struggle. I think so.

Speaker 1 I like Nadia Komenich.

Speaker 3 Nicole Kidman, she was.

Speaker 1 I just like saying Nadia Komenich's name.

Speaker 3 But how badass is it that

Speaker 3 you have two moves that are named after you? Yes. But this is where we run into a problem as gymnastics fans, as we are, which is we don't know what we're watching when we watch it.
Right.

Speaker 1 It'd be sick if they just had an event where the judges were just normal people that had never seen gymnastics before and so they just judge things off how badass they look yes because really that's what the sport should be about wow that's cool that's all you get that's all you need cool point and then you win yeah um hank what was the magic tweet you were gonna read the polinka one yeah it was so good he's do you want to read it yeah i don't i honestly don't think i For a minute there, I thought that Magic maybe is self-aware, but then I read his whole timeline and he was doing a breakdown of all the playoffs.

Speaker 1 And in the middle of it, he said,

Speaker 1 Lakers GM Rob Palinka has

Speaker 1 a lot of work to do this summer because a lot of Lakers did not perform well during the series against the Phoenix Suns.

Speaker 1 That's actually like the most boring recap of the series that you could potentially do.

Speaker 3 Let me ask you this: if you're LeBron James, do you think that maybe he could be talking about you?

Speaker 1 Hmm, I don't know. Maybe.
I think if you're LeBron James, you think that, but he Magic's tweets, like, he really is putting effort. Didn't we hear someone told us that he doesn't tweet?

Speaker 1 He texts his tweets to someone else. Yeah, Rob Lowe.
Yeah, Rob Lowe said that. Which actually now makes so much sense.
Like the whole thing makes perfect sense that they do read his text messages.

Speaker 1 Like if someone's like, hey, Magic, what do you think about like what?

Speaker 1 I think if you read Magic tweets, there's a prompt that we're missing. Like someone texted Magic and was like,

Speaker 1 his tweeter said, hey, Magic, like, what do you think about Rob Palinka? Like, what does he have to do? Does he have a lot to do?

Speaker 1 And he's like, Lakers GM Rob Palinka has a lot of work to do this summer because a lot of Lakers did not perform well during the series against the Phoenix Suns.

Speaker 3 That's kind of fascinating because you could...

Speaker 3 You could... The person is treating it like it's a post-game press conference.
Right. And it's their job to reach out to Magic.
Magic still feels like he's getting interviewed. Right.

Speaker 3 What if it was somebody on the Lakers that was actually transcribing these and using his voice to send subtle behind-the-back, like, you know, subterfuge messages?

Speaker 1 I just wonder if there's,

Speaker 1 if you have this setup where you text someone and say, hey, can you tweet this for me? There probably is a follow-up text being like, hey, how'd that one do?

Speaker 1 And is the person like, yo, it's popping? Like, people love this Rob Polinka stuff. That's a hot take by you, Magic.
Yeah. Or do you think he tells them the truth?

Speaker 1 He's like, you sound like a robot and everyone's mocking you.

Speaker 3 Well, I think it's, it's a person, so it's got to be someone with an agenda. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Yeah. So, I mean, they're probably getting paid way too much money to just be magic.
I will, Magic, if you're listening to this I will do the job for free

Speaker 3 for the love of the game for the love of the game.

Speaker 1 I will tweet anything that you text me and I will I will always be on call.

Speaker 3 I think that we could probably just create Magic Johnson's voice replicate it pretty easily.

Speaker 1 I've never done the

Speaker 1 the only time I've ever switched my handle and tried to like do people was I did it with Magic Johnson and I changed my Twitter profile and I tweeted something and it it got like it was the only time I could ever get everyone.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Because he is a parody of himself.

Speaker 1 so if you do it it's believable if you even do if you make the the most boring tweet possible people would believe that's from magic johnson how much do you think his ghost tweeter gets paid again i'll do it for free yeah for free we'll save you a lot of money yeah for free for free uh jake all right before we get to ryan whitney do you have a who's back for us i do it's scoregami but a different type first for if you say for lacrosse i'm gonna punch you in the nose all right cool baseball but not a final score so jordan montgomery of the Yankees earlier this week, he had a unique box score for his pitching line.

Speaker 1 Six in a third inning, five hits, three runs, one earned run, two walks, six K's. 1.1 million

Speaker 1 box scores for pitchers. That's never happened before.

Speaker 3 Say it again.

Speaker 1 It's pretty normal numbers. Six in a third innings pitched.
Five hits, three runs, one earned run, two walks, six Ks.

Speaker 3 It's never happening before.

Speaker 1 It's got to be the three runs, one earned run. It's got to be three runs, one earned.
Yeah, it starts to get it. But that's got to to narrow it down, right? Yeah.

Speaker 1 Because if you give up three runs to only have one of them earned,

Speaker 1 wow.

Speaker 3 Trevor Bower had a scoreigami pitching line today, too. He was the only person to ever strike out a guy with one eye closed.
He struck out a Kuna.

Speaker 1 So that's

Speaker 1 Trevor Bauer statue. What happened? Jacob DeGrom also is like the greatest pitcher of all time.
It's pretty fucking ridiculous. Yeah.
I know that's not actually true, but

Speaker 1 2021 through nine starts, 58 innings pitched. He's got a 0.62 ERA.
He's pitched 58 innings. He's given up only 25 hits.
That's fucking ridiculous. 93 Ks.

Speaker 3 How many hits does he have as a player?

Speaker 1 I don't know, but that's a.

Speaker 3 If he out-hit himself,

Speaker 1 I think he has as many RBIs as Irm Runs. He probably does.

Speaker 1 93Ks

Speaker 1 on 58 innings pitched and only 25 hits. Jesus Christ.
All right, let's get to our interview with Ryan Whitney.

Speaker 3 Before we get to him, I want to talk to you guys about our great friends over at...

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Speaker 1 Okay, we now welcome on our best friend. It is Ryan Whitney.
We're talking some hockey. It is time.
Enough NBA sick league. He's wearing a

Speaker 7 What a joke of a league.

Speaker 1 Go ahead.

Speaker 3 Yeah, no, I can't believe that there's a league where the superstars all lose in the first round. That sucks.

Speaker 7 Oh, you think that's why I'm calling it a sick league PFT, you piece of shit?

Speaker 7 The best player in the world's walking off the court with 15 minutes left in the game like an asshole, and nobody says a word to him. And then he talks about his fucking cartoon movie after the game.

Speaker 7 Imagine being on that team. You just lost after being champions year for it, talking about the Monsters.

Speaker 1 Credit.

Speaker 3 Goon Squad. Goon Squad.

Speaker 1 Yeah, credit to me for getting that clip. It was like old times.
I waited up till 3 a.m. to watch that press conference because

Speaker 1 I knew he'd say something stupid. And he didn't know.

Speaker 7 Hey, you tweeted it too. You go, I think I got to wait up for the press conference, but he's going to do treatment for four hours.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I was seriously, I was laying in bed with my headphones in, and I'm sitting there watching LeBron James give a press conference at 3 a.m. being like, come on, say something dumb.

Speaker 1 And then right at the end, he's like, yeah, I think I'm going to get ready for the Goon Squad.

Speaker 1 All right, so I just want to preface something real quick because people are like, Holy shit, Wit is shot out of a cannon.

Speaker 1 Ryan Whitney right now is in the midst of like a live stream war, and he's playoff hockey. His brain, I don't think, knows how like the real world is working.

Speaker 1 He's just it's it's used to just screaming at the top of his lungs, like, fuck you, like, fuck you, Frankie.

Speaker 7 Yes, he took a shot at hockey.

Speaker 1 He actually took a shot in hockey. Yeah, but you are

Speaker 1 free quick. Would you say it's fair, though, to say you're you're in war mode right now?

Speaker 7 No, I think R.A. and Grinelli are in a little bit more of war mode.
I love fucking with Frankie Barelli, and the whole stream was awesome.

Speaker 7 I was actually happy he got a win because it was probably the best night of his life. But I do enjoy being able to scream during live streams and everything like that.

Speaker 3 Yeah, it's been incredible. So are you guys, you're staying in Boston right now? Next stream is in Boston, or are you guys going back to Barellis?

Speaker 7 No, so wherever the game is, which game will be in Boston, the stream's in the opposite city. So all these guys are headed back to Long Island for game five, five live stream from Barellis.

Speaker 7 I can't make it, but I'll be here for game six when they're back in Long Island, and we'll do one in Boston. So Hurricanes was bumping.
The place was going bananas.

Speaker 7 R.A., they were chanting, all right.

Speaker 1 All right.

Speaker 7 If you know chiclets, R.A. getting his name chanted, going bananas, slamming a chair on the ground like he was a WWF wrestler.
It was an amazing scene.

Speaker 1 Yeah, and he did the Frankie. You got to watch the clip.
We'll post it. it uh Frankie saying fuck you to everyone it was it was seriously like Scarface who's the bad guy and R.A.

Speaker 1 just doing the old Italian, like, you know, hey, the chin move. So, I like that.
That was old school. All right.
So, what, so this series, let's talk about this series first.

Speaker 1 It's, it's crazy because it feels like it's very even,

Speaker 1 but didn't everyone predict that the Bruins would handle the Islanders somewhat easily?

Speaker 7 I picked the Bruins in seven, and I think most people, uh, R.A., what'd you have?

Speaker 1 I have Bruins in seven. All right, most people thought it.

Speaker 7 I think everyone figured that the Islanders are never going to be an easy out because they're so difficult to play against and they clog up the neutral zone. It's like the Devils.

Speaker 7 Lou Lamarillo was the GMO. All those Devils teams are pretty similar.
And I think the Bruins are the better team. And I think if you look at all four games, overall, the Bruins have played better.

Speaker 7 But the Islanders have gotten good goaltending from Varlomov. He's been really good the last two games.

Speaker 7 They get timely scoring and they just end up frustrating you and getting that goal last, you know, late in the third by Barzell. So I'm not surprised it's tied after two.
I think it'll still go seven.

Speaker 7 They'll probably split the next two. I hope so because game seven is kind of what we live for, boys.
You know that. Not the NBA, though.

Speaker 1 Two most beautiful words in the English language.

Speaker 7 140 to 105 in game seven.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I saw R.A. tweeted like, oh, these games, game seven just becomes a three-point contest.

Speaker 1 Yeah, probably.

Speaker 1 Right.

Speaker 7 The whole fucking league's a three-point contest.

Speaker 1 The whole league's a three-point contest. Luca's awesome.
Shut up.

Speaker 1 The pasta miss.

Speaker 1 That oh my god. How long does that stick in his head?

Speaker 7 Because that's got to be like you've got to wake up like in the like two months from now being like i cannot believe that goal is never open i thought that was i was i was at the nets game last night and i was catching up i thought he missed like an actual like goalie pulled open net that's how open it was i know it was it was a sick pass and so right when it happened i'll take you through the sequence of events fight i'm next to feelberg and we're like no no that didn't just happen like one of the best players in the world that shows how crazy the game can be so then frankie says to me right away he's like how long would that like stick with you and rattle you?

Speaker 7 I'm like, well, me, I'd never score again. But someone like Pasta, he's going to come down the next shift and not really think about it.

Speaker 7 But fair, in all fairness, he then said, I don't know, man, missing that could, that could change this whole series. That could be one of those plays.
And sure as shit, they went on to lose.

Speaker 7 And Cassidy was asked.

Speaker 7 about it after the head coach of the Bruins. And he mentioned like, yeah, you hate seeing something like that.
You wonder if things are going against you, something to that nature.

Speaker 7 And then Frankie got a text from Matt Molson, who played in the the NHL for a long time, a couple 30 gold years. He goes, if I missed that, I wouldn't sleep for a week.

Speaker 3 Yeah, I mean, right after he missed it, he just fell straight face forward on the ice, like his soul left his body for a little bit. So you don't just move on from that.

Speaker 3 What was the worst miss you ever had?

Speaker 1 I had a...

Speaker 7 I had a play in Pittsburgh. I was having the best year of my career.
And then in the middle of the season, for some reason, Warriors, like, Warrior makes sticks. They're like, hey, try this stick.

Speaker 7 We'll give you some money. I'm like, all right.
So I was having a good year. No reason to switch up sticks.
That game, I got the new Warrior stick.

Speaker 7 They gave me a sick, legit tap in, exactly like Poshnock. And I one-timed it right through the crease.
Where he one-timed it back and hit the post. Mine missed the neck completely.

Speaker 7 I threw the stick into the bench and grabbed my old one.

Speaker 1 There you go. It was a stick's fault.

Speaker 7 Because

Speaker 7 it's the arrow, not the Indian. You know, you can't blame yourself.

Speaker 1 Right. Yeah.
Oh, man.

Speaker 3 Yeah. So I want to steer to a different area real quick because you got the Pink Whitney behind you.
And I don't think I've ever asked you about the Pink Whitney.

Speaker 3 You were probably the world's most successful former hockey defenseman turned liquor salesman.

Speaker 3 Yeah, thank you. How did you invent combining pink lemonade with vodka?

Speaker 7 So I used to drink pink lemonade all the time growing up. I'd go to the movies.
I'd get like the extra, extra large where there's 5,000 calories in the pink lemonade. And then what do you know?

Speaker 7 When I learned about drinking and vodka, I just chucked vodka in my favorite drink, pink lemonade now granted that was like i don't know 99 maybe 2000 i don't even think tito's was around yet and now it's all pink whitney baby so in the end i kept drinking and drinking and drinking and especially playing golf people loved it great summer drink and then boom now it's taken off look at that what a story

Speaker 1 pretty simple that's pretty much i mean like steve jobs ryan whitney How did you invent the computer? How'd you invent pink lemonade with vodka?

Speaker 7 Same thing. I programmed my brain to know to put vodka in my favorite drink, and you programmed the computer.

Speaker 3 You combine your two favorite things, and they happen to work and be delicious together. I do like Pink Whitney.

Speaker 3 I just, I feel like every time you come to the office here, we get bullied into taking shots of your pink Whitney.

Speaker 3 So I'm curious to know, every time I take a nip, I drink a nip of your Pink Whitney, how much money is going directly into your pocket?

Speaker 7 Probably like

Speaker 7 two cents.

Speaker 1 Yeah, that's still pretty good.

Speaker 7 The one night you did 10, so that's that's 20 cents. I'll take it.
Just under a quarter.

Speaker 3 You were forcing me to. So I knew that you were getting a cut on the tail end of it.

Speaker 7 Yeah, exactly. But I will say this: nothing has worked like Pink Whitney in terms of getting goals.
Whenever we're on these streams or we need goals, we do shots of Pink Whitney.

Speaker 7 Next thing you know is the overs hitting. I love that.
It's really wild. Yeah.

Speaker 1 I mean, that's you have to have something. You have to have like gold juice to get yourself going.

Speaker 1 All right, let's talk about some other series. The Canadiens,

Speaker 1 they are the team that no one expected. Like, they're not even good, and they're now up 3-1 in the third game to go up 3-0 against the Jets.
They beat the Lease, which we knew the Lease would choke.

Speaker 1 But what the hell is going on with them? Are they just, are they getting hot at the right time? Are you waiting for them to turn back into a pumpkin?

Speaker 7 I thought for sure Winnipeg would at least win game three. They got nothing going.
It's pathetic.

Speaker 7 I think Montreal isn't good. They have an amazing goalie who's like hitting his stride at the right time, which is kind of like what the Canadians do.
Patrick Waz, rookie year, took him to the cup.

Speaker 7 You know, Ken Dryden took him to the cup as a rookie. It's like they get goaltenders that get hot.
And then the magic of the Canadians jersey, they end up winning games and winning series.

Speaker 7 They'll probably win this series and looking like they're going to go up 3-0.

Speaker 7 They will get pounded by Vegas or the Avalanche. That's already the matchup where Boston Islanders are going to play the winner, Tampa, Carolina.

Speaker 7 So the Canadians will get into the probably Final Four and then just get shit pounded.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 3 So you brought up the goalies that are like getting hot at the right time. What's the difference? Where's the line between a goalie that's hot and a goalie that's standing on his head?

Speaker 7 That's a tough line. That's a tough line to draw.

Speaker 1 I don't know.

Speaker 7 I think it's the same thing personally. If you were to ask me, I think a guy's standing on his head and he's just really hot to be standing on his head, if that makes sense.

Speaker 3 You got to get hot before you can stand on his head.

Speaker 1 I feel like standing on your head is in the game. Hot is something that happens in a series.
Yeah, I agree.

Speaker 7 You know what I mean? Okay, okay. So he can be hot the whole series, but just one of the games is that he's a good one.

Speaker 1 One game specifically where you know a goalie's standing on his head when he just makes like four or five saves. You're like, how the fuck did he do that? And it's like, nothing's going in tonight.

Speaker 1 And then that can be a bigger, that can be a smaller part of a bigger hot streak.

Speaker 3 Yeah, because then when you lose to the team, you're like, oh, we lost to a hot goalie.

Speaker 1 Right.

Speaker 3 But you can't be like, we lost to the standing man on his head goalie.

Speaker 1 It's too much worse.

Speaker 1 Game two, he stood on his head. Yeah, exactly.
Game three, he was just good. Okay, that's that's interesting.

Speaker 7 And then once you get to game seven, man, he was hot all series.

Speaker 1 Yeah, he was, right, exactly. So what about my bet of the year?

Speaker 7 Sorry, my bet of the year is game one:

Speaker 7 Colorado Vegas winner over Montreal. It'll be the first time Montreal's played in front of fans.

Speaker 7 There'll be 18,000, whatever building wins that series in Colorado, and they are going to, like I said, curb stomp the Canadian.

Speaker 1 Is it going to be like minus like 250?

Speaker 7 Yeah, you take them in regulation, big cat. That's the new point.

Speaker 1 Minus one and a half. Yeah, take that line.
Minus two and a half.

Speaker 7 A minus 200 money line in regulation is like minus 110. I love it.
And then what do you do? What do you do? If they end up going OT, you just live bet your team in overtime. It's a win-win.

Speaker 7 There you go. Okay.
Or a double loss.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Yeah.
Yeah, probably not. Sounds like, yeah, just keep live betting.

Speaker 3 Sounds like you had a system.

Speaker 1 1-800 gambler if you have a problem.

Speaker 3 Just chase your bet with more money.

Speaker 3 I like the idea of betting on the team that, or against a team that hasn't played against fans yet.

Speaker 3 Like, what actual impact does that have, do you think, for a team playing against a southern team now coming down from Canada? They have to go to Colorado, maybe, or Vegas. Did you hear that?

Speaker 1 I listened to that, boy.

Speaker 1 Oh, man.

Speaker 7 I am the other chicklets guy that does not consider the abs a southern market.

Speaker 1 Southern team. He was now busy.
He slept the entire show.

Speaker 3 Well, he had also done four live streams.

Speaker 1 Yeah, right. Obviously, yeah, he listed all his stuff.
And I mean, you're the same way because you just play golf all day, but he listed all the things he did.

Speaker 1 And we're like, that sounds like a regular job. He's like, I've done four live streams and two interviews in six days.
It was one. It was one.

Speaker 7 It was one.

Speaker 7 We had what was called a work week.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 Those will kill you.

Speaker 7 Yeah, no, I was watching that and all of a sudden I hear, yeah, you know, you get the southern markets and car.

Speaker 1 I was like, pardon?

Speaker 7 What? It's the Panthers, the Lightning, the Coyotes, the Kings, and the Avalanche. If you're called the Avalanche, if you're called the Avalanche, it was just a fucking snowstorm.

Speaker 1 That's a good point. We shouldn't have been just a little bit more.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 3 I mean, that was like the fifth most glaringly, obviously wrong thing about what he was saying. But yes, you're right.

Speaker 3 But now they said it, I think we have to consider the Avs to be, like, as far as this postseason goes. Yeah, they're Southern.
They're a Southern market. They're more Southern than the Canadian teams.

Speaker 3 So if you're playing a hot team like the Avalanche in a Southern market, in a stadium in front of fans for the first time all season, like what impact does like opposing fans have cheering against you?

Speaker 3 What effect does that have mentally?

Speaker 7 I don't know about mentally because I actually think that a lot of these guys will be pretty fired up because yes, the fans are all going against you, but you still have like a vibe in the crowd in terms of noise and the atmosphere.

Speaker 7 But it's more about like getting the puck in your own zone and they're cycling offensively and you're chasing around and then the crowd gets going and then the momentum of the game, at least the first period, I think will be, you know, having the ice tilted severely south

Speaker 7 where they're shooting, right? So, because I think the crowd will be so into what's going on.

Speaker 7 And then the Canadian team, the Canadians, it looks like, will just be like, whoa, we haven't dealt with this yet. They'll probably be able to figure it out.

Speaker 7 And in the end, it could help them having the atmosphere, but it'll still be awkward at the beginning.

Speaker 3 So has that actually made a difference on the ice this season? Is it easier to communicate when you don't have fans yelling?

Speaker 3 Are there going to be instances where they might not be able to hear things that they normally hear because there are going to be fans cheering for the first time?

Speaker 7 Yeah, probably. And all these teams, you know, in America, we're dealing with some people had crowds, some didn't, but Canada's had no one.

Speaker 7 And I think the Canadians actually have allowed like 2,000 people in. I guess Quebec's doing a little better or something.

Speaker 7 I I don't know what's going on up north, but I think that in terms of like talking to each other on the ice, it's been one thing all year for the Canadian market teams.

Speaker 7 And now it's just going to be way different.

Speaker 7 Whether it's on the bench talking or on the ice, it's just, it's going to be so loud that they're going to have a little bit of an issue at the beginning to figure it all out.

Speaker 1 What did you make of the Jake Evans hit? I know that you, we didn't have you on after Tom Wilson. You took Tom Wilson's side.

Speaker 3 Thank you for your service.

Speaker 7 I wouldn't necessarily say I took his side.

Speaker 7 I more was going against, and it was very similar with the Scheifley hit on Jake Evans. I'm more going against the new culture in hockey where if somebody's injured, it's like a 10-game suspension.

Speaker 7 They need to be kicked out of the league and everyone goes bananas.

Speaker 7 Everything doesn't seem as bad as I think Twitter makes it seem with hockey. It's like the hockey Twitter crowd, all the reporters get.

Speaker 7 together and every single hit is like the biggest issue in the world. Whereas I'm looking at Mark Schifley's hit there as he stopped skating at the hash mark.

Speaker 7 So he had skated the entire length of the ice, right? So I was okay with a charge. And I said I was okay with a one or two game suspension.
But in the end, he hit him with his feet on the ground.

Speaker 7 He put his shoulder through his chest. The guy was bent over.
So his face is down there. He took the brunt of it.

Speaker 7 And the player who got hit in being Evans, he didn't open, he didn't lift up his head one time. Right.
He was skating with the puck on the left.

Speaker 7 half mark, went around the net to stuff it in, didn't look up once. And he's trying to like lock up a game.
And this other team has one more guy on the ice, down one with a minute to go.

Speaker 7 Like, what did you think was going to happen? Somebody was coming down in the train tracks, man. So, I hate seeing somebody get injured.
I felt awful for the kid.

Speaker 7 It was his birthday and his first-ever playoff goal. But you got to pick your head up in my mind.
You got to protect yourself. That was always what I was taught.

Speaker 7 And it's definitely a different game, but four games is fucking wild for that hit, in my opinion.

Speaker 1 I think the

Speaker 1 way you guys approach it,

Speaker 1 I love it because it is more of like the, hey, this game, and I think hockey has gotten safer, football has gotten safer but there is an element that like things will still happen when you play a physical sport where guys get hit like there's so there's some hits that you can take every you can make every you can change every rule there still will be things where a guy doesn't have his head up and it was unfortunate and maybe he you know like you said charging and all that but like some of these things just can't be taken out of a game and you have to have a little like realistic approach to it so I appreciate you guys when you say that Until the NHL gets rid of hitting, which will never happen, and they'll never get rid of fighting either because the players don't want it out.

Speaker 7 Until that happens, which will never happen. So it's a stupid discussion.
There will always be injuries and there will always be enormous hits. The game is going so fast.
And that's my other thing.

Speaker 7 Fucking people Zaprooter these films and they stop them at like the exact moment. It's like, dude, the guy was going 19 miles an hour.
Like you're stopping it like it was slow motion.

Speaker 7 And in the end, my whole thing is in the game of hockey and any physical game, if you play with your head down, you're going to get injured. It's like, it's a done deal.

Speaker 7 It doesn't matter how dirty the hit is. It doesn't matter how clean the hit is.
If you have your head up, you're able to protect yourself.

Speaker 7 And a lot of guys now, because hittings become less and less, really don't learn to play the game with their head up.

Speaker 7 They have their head down and they're fishing for the puck and they don't realize that, yeah, while there aren't as many hard hitters in the league anymore, the Scott Stevens have pretty much gone away.

Speaker 7 There's still a guy or two on every team that's looking to truck stick stick you. So it is what it is.

Speaker 7 I hate seeing injuries, but four playoff games is considered like eight to ten regular season games, and Scheifele's their best player is a shitty, shitty blow for the Jets.

Speaker 1 By the way, Hank laughed at your pronunciation of Zapruder. And when Hank laughs at your pronunciation of anything.

Speaker 7 Hank's laughing at my pronunciation of anything?

Speaker 3 Six months ago, he thought it was pronounced Thyland.

Speaker 3 So, yeah, that's kind of the case.

Speaker 1 He's mostly right now.

Speaker 1 But yeah, he laughed at that. I was chuckling.
It was.

Speaker 7 You say it, Hank.

Speaker 1 It was a pruder. It just caught me off guard.
It caught me off guard. I wasn't laughing at you.
It just caught me off guard. I chuckled.
That's all.

Speaker 7 Oh, yeah, you're laughing with me.

Speaker 1 You can't check with me.

Speaker 3 You make a good point, though, because that's the thing that it always makes me laugh about hockey Twitter, how you'll see the replies underneath the tweet. There you go.

Speaker 3 The replies underneath the tweet, and there'll be like seven different people capturing the same video in slower motion, having seven different opinions on where the contact was made.

Speaker 3 And it's like at some point, you just got to acknowledge that the game moves pretty fast. It's played on ice.

Speaker 7 It's like, look right here. Look right here.
His shoulders and his face. I'm like, dude, if you didn't stop it right then,

Speaker 7 he started lining the guy up 10 feet ago. Like, you cannot stop an image in hockey or football with these guys going that fast and try to relate it into, like, oh, look at right here.

Speaker 7 It's like that was moving way too quick to even slow down and try to like zap rooter it.

Speaker 1 Zap Root Ruder it. Um, Biz, just you just showed Biz.
What's up with Biz's foreskin? What's the latest?

Speaker 7 I actually just sold it to Legal Seafood here in the harbor. So we're going to

Speaker 7 make some profit off of it. And if you're looking for a good calamari,

Speaker 7 a nice calamari platter, go check it out. Hey, hey, pink foreskin.
It's just going to be a, you're going to have a shot of pink Whitney with a little Christmas foreskin.

Speaker 1 It's like the tequila worm. It's the tequila worm at the bottom of the bottle.

Speaker 7 Yeah.

Speaker 1 Exactly. There you go.
There you go. We got to brand it, though.

Speaker 1 Are you actually gonna

Speaker 7 there's a biz 20 promo code for

Speaker 1 wait? So so for people who don't know uh biz said on a live stream, I think that if the leafs lose to uh Montreal in the first round, they were up, I think, in the series.

Speaker 1 He said he would get circumcised. Now that happened in January.

Speaker 1 January. So when are you getting circumcised?

Speaker 7 I know, big cat. It was kind of like your finger thing, but in the end.

Speaker 1 But I didn't wait. My finger thing, I didn't lose.
No, I'm saying like it was a bet like throughout the year.

Speaker 7 Yeah.

Speaker 7 But when he lost it, I was kind of like, dude, I think people are going to be all over you. We talked to different doctors and people.
Like, if he got a boner for six weeks,

Speaker 1 he could die.

Speaker 1 And you're a horny guy.

Speaker 1 You're a very horny guy. Yeah.
You're a very horny guy.

Speaker 7 He gets bonked all the time. So he can't be getting his stitches ripped out with a hard-on middle of the night when he's having a wet dream.

Speaker 3 Wait, so you're going to back out of it?

Speaker 7 How much would you pay to have a wet dream, PFT?

Speaker 1 $0.

Speaker 3 I don't pay for sex. Dude, wet dreams are all.

Speaker 1 I'm lying to myself. It's been like 20 years.
It was the best. Yeah.
Oh, it's a virtual reality.

Speaker 1 It's virtual reality porn.

Speaker 7 Exactly.

Speaker 1 It's a hand drop from God. Oh, my God.

Speaker 1 This is sick.

Speaker 3 Wait,

Speaker 3 I have a question about your foreskin. So you're not going to get it cut off.
You're like officially, you're bowing out of this bet. You're welching on it?

Speaker 7 No, we're looking into it. Maybe there's some other things I could do to keep the people happy who really want it removed.
It's mostly just HABs fans up in Canada here who they're up 4-1 now.

Speaker 7 They're going to close out this series. They're going to be up 3-0.
So they got enough good things going on. I'll support them the rest of the way, but they ain't getting my cocks.

Speaker 1 Can you get partially circumcised?

Speaker 3 Can you do just like a

Speaker 3 circumcision?

Speaker 7 That's the problem. If I take the foreskin off, half of it's gone.
So it's like, fuck, what am I going to do, right? He goes from four and a half inches to three and a half.

Speaker 1 That's a tough inch.

Speaker 3 Proportionally, that's a huge inch, yeah.

Speaker 1 Hey, Biz, why don't you just do this? Why don't you say, if the if the Habs win the cup, you'll get

Speaker 1 their logo tattooed on your neck?

Speaker 7 Because he already has a stale pumpkin on his forearm. What the fuck's a Habs logo on his neck?

Speaker 1 On his neck?

Speaker 7 It's better than the tattoos he has.

Speaker 1 All right, so maybe on his face.

Speaker 3 Or on his penis.

Speaker 1 You get it as a little eye drop. You know?

Speaker 7 Yeah, I'll get a Canadian logo eye drop on a tear.

Speaker 7 You heard it here first.

Speaker 1 All right, here it is.

Speaker 1 If the Havs win the cup, you're going to get a teardrop with the Canadians logo.

Speaker 7 Exactly. I don't think there's a chicken dicks chance that the Havs are going to get out of the next drop.

Speaker 7 i don't even know how they're doing it i don't understand how they're doing what they're doing now let alone uh i already said they stay the counterpoint the counterpoint biz to that argument would be well you already put up your penis and you lost that i got nothing else to say buddy well toronto toronto's the biggest bunch of scrubs they lose every year in the first round he just thought this year was different we had a long day of a sandbagger we were drinking pink whitney and he made this call about his foreskin it wasn't even a bet it just came out of nowhere and it came back to bite him in the in the foursie well yeah what if what if it was just like I'll give up one testicle?

Speaker 3 Because you can get along with one testicle. Lance Armstrong did it.
John Cruck did it.

Speaker 7 It's been if I'm getting anything done, MLSC and those guys in Toronto making over 10 million collectively pay for it, then I would consider it.

Speaker 7 But that's we got to start there because they're the ones who cost me my cock or part of it.

Speaker 1 Unbelievable.

Speaker 1 Wait, so what,

Speaker 1 like, what the fuck do the Leafs do? This is, this is now, I mean, they're just, they're just a sad organization.

Speaker 7 They're the red socks they're they're on their way to like red sox cubs territory here like no joke yeah but we were saying it was like it would be like if the cowboys didn't win another title for like 25 years because they've won like they've won they won't 67 right right so i mean that's like that's it's in i think in 15 days it'll be the longest drought in the history of the nhl

Speaker 7 okay that's crazy So, which is that kind of shocked me. Yeah.
Like, there's so many, you know, there's so many new teams that have come into the league after 67.

Speaker 7 But the whole thing is with Toronto, they had Matthews Marner stud superstars, but Tavares made that other line go.

Speaker 7 And then when he got injured, I didn't think it would affect him because I didn't think Montreal was shit. And then Price got hot.
And then those Martiner-Matthews guys didn't do anything.

Speaker 7 And that was all she wrote for the Leafs. So the question now for Leafs fans is like, what do you do next?

Speaker 7 Because they tried fixing all their issues off this pass offseason and still lost in the first round.

Speaker 3 Right.

Speaker 3 That's what I was going to ask you because, like, it's got to be at least a big part mentally right now like mentally draining on them for the for not only like it's a block for them to get out of there but every time they lose in the first round it's like another notch in that mental bedpost where you're like fuck we can't do it so like you have to make some weird change

Speaker 3 but they don't really have like they're too talented to make any weird changes they're guys that you don't want to take a chance getting rid of or dealing so if it looks like they have no cap space let's pretend you're gm of the maple leafs right now what do you do i don't pretend to ever be a gm I can barely even get up and get dressed in the morning.

Speaker 7 I could never decide rosters. I could never pick anything.

Speaker 7 My only guess, my only guess

Speaker 7 would be to try to maybe trade Nielander, who was their best player in the playoffs, but you can't trade Marner, Matthews, or Tavares because of what they make and how good they are.

Speaker 7 Trade Nielender and maybe get another stud D.

Speaker 7 They have some good D. They just signed this Brody from Calgary last summer.
He's good, but I don't know, man. I don't know.
It's a disaster up there.

Speaker 1 Um, are you still are you still a Bryson guy after this last weekend?

Speaker 7 I think both of them are nerds, to be honest. Your guys are boys with Brooks, but what is, yeah, what Bryson, what Bryson has done,

Speaker 7 and honest to God, if you don't like a nickname, the worst thing in the world you can do is tell people you don't like it, and then you'll be called it forever.

Speaker 7 And the fact that people are getting kicked out of BJ Torvets for calling him Brooksy,

Speaker 7 I would try to sue.

Speaker 1 You can't call a golfer the wrong name

Speaker 7 out of an event you paid for for that.

Speaker 1 It's crazy. It's it's the the uh dude Branley Chambley, who's fucking sucks.
He blocked me. I had to go on my alt account Youngstown.
Randall, Randall blocked you, yeah. Oh, yeah, oh, yeah.

Speaker 1 He was like, this is bullying. Like, I hope people realize, like, dude, he's not.

Speaker 1 Don't say anything mean to him. You can't literally just say Brooksy.

Speaker 3 You can't bully the fucking U.S. Open champion.

Speaker 1 Yes.

Speaker 1 And it's not like, hey, you're fat or like, oh, like, you know, get hit by a button. They're literally just saying, let's go, Brooksy.

Speaker 7 And people are calling it heckling. I'm like, I think you have to be mean to be considered a heckler.

Speaker 1 They're saying the wrong name. And here's the thing, dude.

Speaker 7 How the fuck did Bryson G. Chambeau win a U.S.
Open? He's the most

Speaker 1 true. Two things.

Speaker 1 Two things. No fans, no Brooks Kepka.
And also. He never finished higher than Brooks Kepka in a major when Brooks played.

Speaker 7 Do you think they're all, do you think they're just teeing this up for like a boxing match or something?

Speaker 3 You would think that if you didn't know better, but Bryson is like incapable of planning that out. He can't do anything like

Speaker 1 Bryson's tweet.

Speaker 7 Yeah. Yeah.
Bryson's tweet about Brady, the deflated balls, I was like, oh my God, he's that much of a geek.

Speaker 7 He's that much of a geek. That was the worst tweet I've ever read.

Speaker 3 PFT? No, it was a bad tweet. Yes.

Speaker 1 PFT made like the same joke two weeks before. But

Speaker 3 I didn't make the tweet about Tom Brady and like the fucking golf balls deflating. I made a joke about something that actually was deflating, which was Bitcoin at the time.

Speaker 3 So at least there was a correlation there. Right, right.

Speaker 1 But with Bryce.

Speaker 1 Right, right. I mean, Tom seemed to think it was.

Speaker 3 Tom, I take my criticism from Tom Brady about my jokes. I don't take it from you two guys.

Speaker 1 Yeah, well,

Speaker 1 he's seen better. Yep.
So that means it sucks.

Speaker 3 I accept that from Tom Brady.

Speaker 1 Nothing worse than sending out a tweet.

Speaker 7 Nothing worse than sending out a tweet. The usual likes you get, it's like one-eighth of it.
You're like, oh, no, I can't delete it. It's your bad tweet.

Speaker 3 What was the worst tweet you've had?

Speaker 7 Oh, fuck. I can't think of it.
I can't think of any. I've had some bad.
Just go to my Twitter and look for the ones that have like 63 likes and there's other ones with 6,000.

Speaker 1 Was the Taylor Hall hangman tweet like your first viral tweet? I always see that go re-viral.

Speaker 7 I was talking to...

Speaker 7 Borelli about that. I don't know if you know this tweet, Big Cat and PFT.
It was so old. Do you guys remember when the pictures on Twitter had to be from like Y-Frog?

Speaker 1 Yeah. Oh, yes.
Yes. Yes.

Speaker 7 So you can't even get the picture anymore, but we were all not playing in an exhibition game in Minnesota. We're on the Oilers, obviously.
And so I was like, let's play Hangman, guys.

Speaker 7 So I think it was Halsey did the hangman.

Speaker 7 He had Eberly guessing. And the word was banana split.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 1 Halsey spelt banana wrong, right?

Speaker 7 And then Eberly was guessing. And the second word, banana was spilled, but it was spelled wrong.
And then the second word was S-P-Space IT, and Ebbs couldn't guess that it was split.

Speaker 7 And so I wrote, I think I picked, I was sitting next to them, and I was living with them. I'm like, oh my God, I'm 30 years old at 19.

Speaker 7 I'm like, I wrote, Ebbs can't figure out the second word, split, and Halsey can't spell banana.

Speaker 1 How many games did you guys win that year?

Speaker 3 Oh, we finished dead last.

Speaker 3 Hey, we always talk about like overtime when we're watching overtime, how bad it sucks as a fan to watch it.

Speaker 3 Is it harder to watch overtime or play in overtime in the playoffs?

Speaker 7 It's so much harder watching. Like

Speaker 7 as a gambler, like if you're watching your favorite team, just know the guys playing, there really aren't nerves. I'll tell you, seriously, I played in a triple overtime game in the cup finals.

Speaker 7 It is all about like next shift, next shift. You're not panicked.
You're just doing the same thing over and over, whereas fans are literally sitting on their hands, shaking the entire time.

Speaker 7 So players are not nervous. I know, like, deep down they're nervous, but the game's going too fast to think about it.
Whereas, fans, you can't even breathe.

Speaker 7 You just, you almost just like want the game to end.

Speaker 1 I'm looking at it right now. He spelled B-A-N.

Speaker 7 He had two ends. Two ends.

Speaker 1 He had three ends.

Speaker 1 Wait. Three ends.
Yeah, B-A-N-A-N-N-A.

Speaker 1 Buh, and like Nana. Yeah, okay.
I got it. That's fucking hilarious.

Speaker 7 I remember Ebs is like, what is that word?

Speaker 1 I'm like, Split bro.

Speaker 3 It is the Y frog. That was so funny when Y Frog got changed.

Speaker 3 And then people's images and their tweets 10 years after the fact got changed to just random pieces of porn because someone went in like the back end on Y Frog and changed everything around.

Speaker 1 And you watch yourself. I remember that.

Speaker 1 Watching?

Speaker 7 Oh,

Speaker 7 Halsey and I got Twitter at the same time.

Speaker 7 Right around the same time. And at the beginning, I was just firing off anything.
And now you look, you're like, what were we doing at the beginning? You could have said whatever you wanted then.

Speaker 1 Oh, my God. Now it's like you're just getting in trouble.

Speaker 1 Unbelievable.

Speaker 3 I want to give you the opportunity to defend yourself because every time you lash out against some fan base, one or another, they get mad at you.

Speaker 3 They're like, oh, Wits being a buffoon because he's talking. He's doing a selfie video again where he's screaming at me because I'm a hockey fan on Twitter.

Speaker 3 And they always reply to you with the picture of your head inside your jersey on the ice after you got turtled by somebody.

Speaker 3 Would you like an opportunity to explain like how you got into that position? Is that just like a bad picture taken at a bad moment?

Speaker 1 Or did you really? I thought I talked about this.

Speaker 7 I thought I'd told this story on your podcast, but Tim Jackman had been trying to fight me since 2001. Maybe, maybe 2002.
He'd been trying to fight me in the USHL, in the AHL, in the NHL.

Speaker 7 And then finally, at one point, he's like, I got him. And I saw him coming after I snapped the pass.
And he's tough as shit. I'm not.
And I immediately went down.

Speaker 7 Well, I didn't think anything of it because I think we won the game and whatever. No big deal.
Next morning, I got my group chat with my buddies back home.

Speaker 7 And one of my buddies goes, What the fuck is this? And it was that picture.

Speaker 1 I was like, Oh my God.

Speaker 7 I was like, When is this thing going to like hit the internet? And then it really didn't for years. I had to retire.
And then I was on barstool radio and I actually brought it up.

Speaker 7 You know, when you got to get ahead of things, that way you control the narrative. I was like, if you guys, it was when Kevin and Dave were doing it together.

Speaker 7 I was like, have you guys ever seen my headless picture? And they just went bananas. And next thing you know, people tweeted at me.

Speaker 7 I'm like, bro, you think I give a f that Tim Jackman beat me up and there's a picture of me with no head? I don't care. I still got paid that game.
I don't get paid to fight.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I mean, you have to own it. And like, what? What it's at some point.

Speaker 7 Everyone's like, Jackman beat the shit out of you. You got no head.
I go, what would he do to you, you pigeon? Look at you on Twitter. You got three chins.

Speaker 1 Yeah. That was like, that was, it's stopped now, but people used to, for at least like two years, would always just be like, you guys got your TV show canceled after one show.
It's like, okay.

Speaker 1 Like, we had a TV show. Yeah, you have.
Yeah, right. We had a a fucking TV show, and it doesn't hurt anymore a little bit, but whatever.

Speaker 7 I love saying, though, like, I love saying about Twitter people, it's like, you think I care? As I'm like, screaming about how much I care.

Speaker 1 Yeah, right, right, right, right.

Speaker 1 All right. Last question.

Speaker 1 Give it up for Chicago.

Speaker 8 Sebastian Maniscalco's new stand-up special, It Ain't Right, is coming to Hulu on November 21st.

Speaker 1 30 years ago, Jeff Bezos, complete nerd. Bezos now ripped to shreds on his super yacht and the boxes keep

Speaker 1 coming

Speaker 8 sebastian maniscalco it ain't right premieres november 21st streaming on hulu and hulu on disney plus for bundle subscribers terms apply

Speaker 7 what is the prediction for the rest of the bruins islanders series and then give us your cup final uh okay so i i picked the bees in seven so i think they win tomorrow at home i think they lose on long island i think they win at home in game seven uh that's not really going too crazy that the home teams win in the next three, but I think the Bruins move on.

Speaker 7 I then think that uh

Speaker 7 unfortunately the Bruins and Islanders are playing to like lose to Tampa in five games. Tampa's so good, they're so deep.
They have the best goalie in the league.

Speaker 7 Some Kucharov's got like 17 points already, and even playing the regular season. So I'm going to Tampa, and I think the Avs end up getting it done against the Knights and then smoke the Canadians.

Speaker 7 And we're looking at Tampa, Colorado, and I think it'll be one of the best cup finals we've ever seen.

Speaker 1 Wow. Okay.
Wow. Two southern teams.
Yeah. Two southern teams.

Speaker 7 Yeah. Yep.
Two southern teams. Yeah, I'm on a southern team.
Oh, what's your nickname? It's a snowstorm that can kill people.

Speaker 1 What an idiot.

Speaker 1 I made the whole room laugh.

Speaker 1 Let's just end on that. That's the perfect way to end.

Speaker 7 All right, guys. Love you.

Speaker 1 Love you too. Love you.
See you later.

Speaker 3 Ryan Whitney is brought to you by our great friends over at

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Speaker 9 Get 40% off your first Aldi order on Uber Eats with code new Aldi25. Orders $30 or more, save up to $25, and it's 1231.
See ya for details.

Speaker 1 Okay, our Monday reading. Tonight is not a reading.
We're going to live watch the Mayweather vs. Paul.

Speaker 1 Logan. Logan Paul.
Logan Paul. Logan Paul fight.

Speaker 3 He walked out. He's got a Pokemon card around his neck.

Speaker 1 Charizard.

Speaker 1 I missed Charizard. I missed Pokemon.
I was like a little bit before.

Speaker 3 Yeah, me too. Is it Charmander?

Speaker 1 I think that's our biggest difference, actually, is that you're a Pokemon guy. We're not.
And Yu-Gi-Oh! Like, we're Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. We only had to remember four of them.
So wait.

Speaker 1 It was Charmander, and then I believe the middle one. There's three stages to every Pokemon.
So like Charmander's Little Baby.

Speaker 3 I think it was...

Speaker 1 Charmeleon. I think so.
It was the middle. Squirtle is the only one I remember.
Charizard. Squirtle, and then Blastoid was big Squirtle.
Oh, bonk. Damn.
Yeah. Okay, so they're ready to go.

Speaker 3 There's no judge. Do you guys remember the Pokemon thing where like four years ago, the Chinese government basically had us take videotapes of our living rooms and put them online?

Speaker 1 Yeah. That was cool.
That was cool. Let me give you something more wild real quick because I have a winner that still does Pokemon Go.

Speaker 3 Really? He's probably the best person. There is a ref.

Speaker 1 There is a ref. Here's what I don't understand.
So they said they were announcing it as they were coming in, and they were like, everyone's a winner tonight because

Speaker 1 no no one's gonna lose, and everyone's going home with a bag, and everyone's gonna watch something that's exciting.

Speaker 1 It's like, wait, but this is dudes, we would like to watch a knockout or a sports arena, yeah. So, I still can't really wrap my head around it.

Speaker 3 So, basically, Floyd is doing this so that he ensures that no matter what happens, he's still not gonna take an L.

Speaker 1 Correct.

Speaker 3 Although he could get knocked out, he could get knocked out, he could get KO'd, but he won't take an L.

Speaker 1 Dude, Logan Paul is fucking jacked. Yeah, Logang.

Speaker 1 Why is he say Dorado, Puerto Rico?

Speaker 3 Is that where he's fighting out of?

Speaker 1 I guess so. Is that where he's transferred? Oh, he moved there.
He moved there for like tax reasons. Tax reasons.
And for steroids, maybe for steroid reasons.

Speaker 1 That's actually a sick move. I like that.

Speaker 3 But wait, they're part of the United States. Yeah.
They pay income taxes.

Speaker 1 You can win mega millions Powerball in Puerto Rico. Right.

Speaker 3 So why would he move there? I don't know. I don't know anything about taxes.

Speaker 1 Sounds good. Yeah.

Speaker 1 He looks jacked.

Speaker 3 He's got a mullet. Nipple size.
Baby mullet.

Speaker 1 Decent, decent nipple size. Maybe large.
Okay, traps.

Speaker 1 Oh, there's the other.

Speaker 1 There's the other one. Jake.

Speaker 3 Jake is the one that's really good at boxing. Correct.
So people seem to dislike Jake more than they dislike Logan.

Speaker 1 I can't actually keep them like...

Speaker 1 I don't know. Oh, they're stalking each other in the ring.
I still don't know. Logan is the more mature, business-minded, smart.

Speaker 3 He was jacked it first.

Speaker 1 No, that's Jake. Is he the older? He's older.
He was doing it first. Jake kind of followed his lead and is the bad boy, but Logan did the suicide forest.
But that we don't, we forgave him for that.

Speaker 1 He's come all the way back from the best. Correct, correct.
That was a youthful mistake when he was at 28. Yeah, yeah.
All right, predictions real quick before they actually touch gloves.

Speaker 1 Are there going to be rounds?

Speaker 1 Or is it just like fighting? I think it's three rounds, eight three-minute rounds.

Speaker 3 Okay, I'm going to say that.

Speaker 1 It's not going four. Well, by the way, we're watching

Speaker 1 the soccer game, too, and we're bringing in some tall, lanky-ass backup goalie.

Speaker 3 This can't be good. No one's going to win.
That's my prediction.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 All of us lose. I'm going to predict that there will never be a clean shot on Floyd.
Floyd, unfortunately, can't probably knock him out because he's too small. So it's going to be...

Speaker 1 It's going to be like Westside's story. They're just going to dance.
They're going to dance fight.

Speaker 3 I think that Jake Logan is going to catch him once. I think he's going to catch him one time.

Speaker 3 And then that'll wake Floyd up. Because remember when when Floyd will let him, yeah, yeah.
We saw the Mayweather McGregor fight a few years ago. Same type of thing happen.
Yes. He gets bored.

Speaker 3 He likes to play with his food before you.

Speaker 1 You guys ever watched that back, or did you just try and get it? Yeah, I did.

Speaker 1 It was not even close.

Speaker 1 We thought it was a lot closer. There was that one round, like round three, where McGregor kind of like roughed him up.

Speaker 3 Okay, here we go.

Speaker 3 No touching gloves. These guys don't like each other, huh?

Speaker 1 Wow. Real bad blood.
There is a huge size difference. Damn.

Speaker 1 And no one's lending. No one's doing it.

Speaker 3 They're smiling at each other.

Speaker 1 They're winking.

Speaker 3 This might suck. I think they're going to kiss

Speaker 1 Logan's gas already. I'm actually going to give Logan credit here.
I think he does kind of want to try to fight him.

Speaker 1 But Floyd doesn't want to fight. No.

Speaker 1 Floyd, this is.

Speaker 3 Oh, my God. All right, round two.

Speaker 1 Yeah, he doesn't care. He just wants the bag.

Speaker 3 Round two, just release a bunch of cats in the ring at once.

Speaker 1 Or just make the ring smaller and smaller every single round. Cut off, move the ropes in.
Actually, that would be... We should start a fighting league like that.

Speaker 1 Every round

Speaker 1 gets closer and closer. It's Warzone.
That would be sick.

Speaker 3 Gas. We'll have poisonous gas on the outside of the ring.

Speaker 1 That would actually be... Yeah, I mean, it would solve a lot of problems with fighting.
Guys don't want to fight.

Speaker 3 They end up just kissing each other.

Speaker 1 Okay, round two. Here we go.
Ding, ding, ding. This one should be electric.

Speaker 3 They were really feeling each other out in that first round.

Speaker 3 The amount of respect shown between these two is just off the charts.

Speaker 3 They know that both of them one mistake and the other's lights out. Lethal punches.

Speaker 3 They're just Ropa doping all of the United States right now.

Speaker 1 I'm being Ropa dope. I said that the minute I walked in today, we were talking about getting this bite.

Speaker 1 And I was like, I'm pretty mad about getting this bite and watching it and being like, what the fuck did I just watch? But I still had to get it because you have.

Speaker 3 You have to. Just in case something crazy happens.

Speaker 1 Right. You can't not get it.

Speaker 3 So they basically have...

Speaker 1 They've tricked us all. It's, it's genius.
I'm not even mad about it.

Speaker 3 Not to get all horny on you guys, but

Speaker 1 how's a good time to talk about it?

Speaker 3 Do you think that there's a market out there for a live pay-per-view sex tape? Yes. I think that there was.

Speaker 1 I think that exists, doesn't it? Is it? I'm pretty sure that's like celebrities. Live fans.
Yeah, like cam shows and stuff. Yeah, now's a good time to talk about

Speaker 1 PFT, your new

Speaker 3 love affair. No, we already discussed it.

Speaker 1 With the porn star? No, we're we're good.

Speaker 1 We're good. Discuss it on the show.

Speaker 3 We're good.

Speaker 1 Let's talk about it now. Two Monday reading.
It's a perfect time. Okay.
All right.

Speaker 3 So I do not, she has a love affair with me. I think that she's, by the way, she's not a porn star.
She's a journalist. Okay.
She does a podcast. It's called No Jumper.

Speaker 1 What's her pinned? She doesn't do that. She doesn't do that podcast.
She appeared on.

Speaker 3 She appears on podcast.

Speaker 3 She's a frequent guest on podcasts. She's a journalist.
She's a sons insider.

Speaker 1 Right. Well, you think she owes No Jumper? The Suns,

Speaker 3 the Suns are inside her.

Speaker 1 PFT is

Speaker 1 in love.

Speaker 3 I'm not in love. She slid into my DMs.
He's in love. Oh, Mexico just scored a goal.
VAR saved me, VAR. Fuck.

Speaker 1 Fuck. Wow, you get two sports at once, and they do a little jump in circle.

Speaker 3 It's embarrassing how many Mexico soccer fans there are in Denver.

Speaker 3 Embarrassing.

Speaker 1 And round three

Speaker 1 is about to end. That was by far the most most action, and there was pretty much no action.
Okay, round three.

Speaker 3 That look from Floyd, though, said,

Speaker 3 I'm mad, and I'm going to actually try to knock you out the next round.

Speaker 1 Yeah, let's see if he holds that, or if maybe someone whispers in his ear and is like, Hey, man, you already got paid. You have $100 million from this fight.

Speaker 3 How much money do you think we're putting in Floyd Mayweather's pocket right now?

Speaker 1 Well, $25, right? At least.

Speaker 1 Yeah, it was $50. I think it was $49.99.
Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 1 Are you a little sick, Jake?

Speaker 1 No.

Speaker 1 Allergies?

Speaker 1 Allergies. I was in Florida there, bad in Florida.
Long weekend? Long weekend?

Speaker 1 With the allergies.

Speaker 3 Were you in Miami with Mike Irvin?

Speaker 1 I wasn't in Miami. Your nose sprayed? A little northwest of stuff?

Speaker 3 Allergies. Need to take some nose spray?

Speaker 1 A little cocaine? No.

Speaker 1 Oh, are you off? Are you done with it? I've been off. Yeah.
You kicked it cold turkey? Yeah, after like a week, I was fine. Even after like, wow.
The summer ramping up this weekend and stuff? Yeah.

Speaker 1 It's pretty crazy.

Speaker 3 Did you see how he snapped at me?

Speaker 1 He was like, no, can't have that.

Speaker 1 Can't even think about it.

Speaker 1 All right, here we go. Round four is starting.
And I agree. I think Floyd's actually going to try here.

Speaker 1 Oh, boy.

Speaker 3 Logan's throwing his body around.

Speaker 3 Just like leaning on him.

Speaker 3 I think that's like a, it's got to be an underrated, annoying part of being a boxer, is the other guy just, like, leaning his whole body on you.

Speaker 1 Oh, boy.

Speaker 3 By the way, I looked up.

Speaker 1 Oh, you just gave him a little ass slap.

Speaker 3 I looked up the Alex Caruso NFT. Yeah.
It's lost like 95% of its value.

Speaker 1 I'm going to say this for Logan Paul.

Speaker 1 This will probably end up producing at least some really cool pictures of him. Yeah.
Like someone taking pictures of Graham is going to be fired. And he'll be like, look at me

Speaker 1 getting in the ring with Floyd Mayweather. Like,

Speaker 1 that's worth it alone for him.

Speaker 3 How many more rounds of this do we have?

Speaker 1 Four.

Speaker 1 I know it's brutal.

Speaker 1 Like, this is actually painful to watch.

Speaker 3 Imagine being at the stadium right now. You're getting rained on.
You're watching a boxing match. Not Brooks.
Imagine

Speaker 3 if you're not on cocaine at this match.

Speaker 1 Brooks is a man of the people.

Speaker 3 He's ridiculous.

Speaker 1 He's underneath the roof. Just want to note that.

Speaker 1 Not on the floor. Because he loves the people.

Speaker 1 Has nothing to do with the fact that he couldn't afford the floor seats.

Speaker 3 It's just the people. You want to just debate MJ LeBron while this is going on?

Speaker 1 Oh, man. I saw that one guy was like, the, the, the.

Speaker 1 All right.

Speaker 1 I hate that you just did this to me, but I'm just gonna, I gotta say this one thing, okay?

Speaker 1 It's been bothering me a lot because LeBron fans have been saying that's the first time LeBron lost in the first round. MJ lost in the first round his first year.

Speaker 1 LeBron didn't make the playoffs his first two years.

Speaker 1 So it's the, it's the reverse of the argument like Nick Wright, which I actually don't think is totally the worst argument where Nick Wright is like, LeBron gets dinged for losing in the finals, but is it better to lose in the conference finals so that you're not, well, the same thing applies for MJ.

Speaker 1 Like,

Speaker 1 I would say losing in the first round is better than not making the playoffs. Right.

Speaker 1 So that just bothered me. But whatever.
I don't take it seriously, guys. Not at all.

Speaker 3 I like that call there. That foul was very much clearly inside the penalty box, but they called it outside because Ref's a coward.

Speaker 1 Mm-hmm.

Speaker 1 It would be awesome if in the last round, Logan Paul just kicked him directly in the penis.

Speaker 1 And that was just like, yup, I won.

Speaker 1 All right, Mayweather's family. This actually tells you how old he is.
that his uh looks like his kids are

Speaker 1 of age

Speaker 1 that's all i'll say what his son to do what and his daughter to be in a boxing to vote to be in a boxing they look like they maybe even to run for president

Speaker 1 oh we got a yellow card oh ref just got pushed oh fuck all right we're switching to soccer all right soccer

Speaker 3 this is actually more action than we've seen in the boxing match yeah

Speaker 1 there was a half a choke there they're pushing.

Speaker 3 Oh, we got our second keeper down. That's great.
Where's Tony Eola?

Speaker 1 Dude, something about a goalie flopping is really, really sick.

Speaker 3 Oh, they're the kings of it.

Speaker 1 Floyd Mayweather, they're throwing his exhibitions. He popped a big show.
He made that guy in Japan cry.

Speaker 1 That's awesome.

Speaker 3 You know what Floyd should do? Floyd should just do exhibition matches against people that have never boxed before

Speaker 3 and just beat the fuck out of him in exchange. Like, he'll pay you $10 million.
Yeah. I would rather watch that.

Speaker 1 All right, round eight. Round seven.
Sorry. I was.
For a second there, I thought maybe we were out of our misery.

Speaker 3 Oh, he went straight into the keeper.

Speaker 1 That should have been... That should be a red.

Speaker 3 Straight red.

Speaker 1 If they were smart, they'd have one of them take a dive in the eighth to just, like, at least.

Speaker 1 Oh,

Speaker 1 whoa.

Speaker 3 What just happened? Anti-discrimination protocol step one has been enacted right now. Seems like there might be puto chance.

Speaker 1 Oh, shit.

Speaker 3 In which case, I don't know which group of fans is initiating the puto chance i'm gonna guess that it's probably mexico

Speaker 1 let's see

Speaker 3 yo winning the concaf nations league championship in added time because of the puto chant whoa

Speaker 1 all-time comeback

Speaker 3 Can they use VAR to go back and review whether or not they're doing a discrimination?

Speaker 1 Yeah, I don't know. All right, round eight.
Sorry, round eight started. We've we've missed the start of it um

Speaker 3 way more interesting the soccer game right now by a large margin this sucks i mean if you're jake paul i mean logan paul this counts as a win right yeah you win eight rounds of floyd mayweather yeah kind of

Speaker 1 yeah like i said the pictures are awesome you can put a picture now the the funny part is when i say the pictures are awesome like you're like yeah for instagram i didn't even think about that i was thinking like for your man cave to put up like or to show you show your kids one day.

Speaker 1 But then I realized I don't think, I don't think Logan Paul has a man cave.

Speaker 3 I think the world is your man cave if you're a Paul brother. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Fuck, man. It also dawned on me that, like, they probably also are doing this because,

Speaker 1 oh, oh, little razzle dazzle. Yeah.
Oh.

Speaker 1 He's, I don't know what he's doing.

Speaker 3 They're not going to fight anymore.

Speaker 1 He's trying to say, look up there.

Speaker 1 Oh, and they're trying to punch him. They're giving him a little something.

Speaker 1 with six seconds left the fight got interesting and that's it that's the fight oh they're gonna try to fight after um one more round do it cowards so i think

Speaker 1 i think what it comes down to oh now jake is saying they won uh what it comes down to is the best after party of all time has to be after a big boxing match after party hank can you speak to that

Speaker 1 Like without 100%, can't confirm it. So Jake Paul and Logan Paul just basically made it the most lucrative, but also most difficult way to have that party, to throw on these huge events.

Speaker 1 And it's all for the after-party, which will be awesome.

Speaker 3 Yeah, I think in an after-party like this, you probably have to spend, I don't know, like 25% of your purse that you took home. So much money.
Yeah, you got to make it worthwhile.

Speaker 1 So much money.

Speaker 3 And also, the Paul brothers are smart because

Speaker 3 they understand that the first person to claim victory gets that moment. Right.
So by his brother declaring that Logan Paul won, I guess we're awarding this.

Speaker 3 My card has it.

Speaker 3 I've got six rounds to Logan, two to Floyd Mayweather, big cat.

Speaker 1 I'm going to go.

Speaker 1 I'll go the opposite. No, wait.

Speaker 3 Wait, I've got three to Logan, two to Floyd, and one to the U.S.-Mexico soccer game.

Speaker 1 Wait, Floyd Mayweather threw 14 jabs in an eight-round fight.

Speaker 1 All right. The fight ended.
No one won.

Speaker 1 For the first time, I'm going to say the participation trophy era is real.

Speaker 3 I think that's my takeaway from this like what did we just watch we all lost they won they both won uh right now early results of the poll coming in after 5700 votes three minutes in we've got 74 of america saying floyd mayweather won so okay congratulations floyd mayweather on your title of uh stupidest champion of all time yeah damn but we really are the stupid champions we won the stupid he buying he's giving us the crown of stupid championship.

Speaker 1 Floyd Mayweather has had a hell of a career getting everyone to buy pay-per-views and then being at the end of it being like, what the fuck did I just watch? For his entire boxing career.

Speaker 1 So congrats to Floyd. He's very rich for it.

Speaker 1 Anything else? That's it. That's our show.
Numbers?

Speaker 3 Give me an eight.

Speaker 1 99.

Speaker 1 92.

Speaker 1 8, 8, 8.

Speaker 3 67.

Speaker 3 Damn.

Speaker 3 You got a fact? Animal fact?

Speaker 1 Yep.

Speaker 3 Did you guys see that clear fish? Animal fact. That's crazy.
A new fish just shot.

Speaker 1 Sloths can swim three times faster than they can move on land and can hold their breath for up to 40 minutes. Whoa.
Wow. That's kind of cool.
Can't drown them. Damn.
Love you guys.

Speaker 1 I'm saved anyway

Speaker 1 Today's enough day to find me shy away

Speaker 1 I'll be coming for your love okay

Speaker 1 shy away

Speaker 1 I'll be coming for your love okay

Speaker 1 are

Speaker 1 eager.

Speaker 1 Needless to say,

Speaker 1 I'm all setting this but please don't let away.

Speaker 1 The love of life is okay.

Speaker 1 Say unto me.

Speaker 1 It's not better to be safe than sorry.

Speaker 1 Say after me

Speaker 1 It's not better to be safe than sorry.

Speaker 1 Take

Speaker 1 on

Speaker 1 me

Speaker 1 Take

Speaker 1 me

Speaker 1 on

Speaker 1 I'll be

Speaker 1 gone

Speaker 1 Things that we say

Speaker 1 the last one.

Speaker 1 Just to play my

Speaker 1 reason,

Speaker 1 you are the things I've got to remember.

Speaker 1 You shine away.

Speaker 1 I'll be coming for you anyway.

Speaker 1 You shine away.

Speaker 1 I'll be coming for you anyway.

Speaker 1 Take

Speaker 1 on

Speaker 1 me

Speaker 1 take

Speaker 1 me

Speaker 1 up.

Speaker 1 I'll be

Speaker 1 gone

Speaker 1 in everything.

Speaker 1 I

Speaker 1 don't think

Speaker 1 you're

Speaker 1 in a

Speaker 1 day.