Playoff Madness, Lebron Secretly Jealous Of AD's Injury, The Maple Leafs Choke, And Monday Reading

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Speaker 1 See Mintmobile.com. On today's part of my take, it's just the fellas, the boys, guys.
Being dudes, we have so much to recap. We're going straight raw dogging it like we do in the fall on Mondays.

Speaker 1 It's just the guys. It's just the guys talking all the sports and a Monday reading and a who's back and hot seat cool throne and Jake went viral this weekend.

Speaker 4 This is almost too much show, big cat.

Speaker 1 Too much show. Too much show.
It's spilling out of us. But we have a great show coming up.
It's an awesome show. We have so much awesome stuff to recap.

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Speaker 1 Okay, let's go.

Speaker 1 violence.

Speaker 1 And then a lot of

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Speaker 1 No place to hang out washing.

Speaker 1 And then I can't name all on the sun. Oh, no, we're gonna rock it down to Elite Track Avenue.

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Speaker 1 Oh, we're gonna rock it down to Elite Track Avenue. It's part of my take, presented by Barb School Sports.

Speaker 1 Welcome to Pardon My Take, presented by ZipRecruiter.com. Today is Tuesday, June 1st.
Are we recording right now, Hank? We're recording? All right, I want to say something bold. Go off.

Speaker 1 I want to make sure this is on the record.

Speaker 1 I

Speaker 1 disavow

Speaker 1 any fans throwing stuff at players.

Speaker 4 There we go.

Speaker 1 Can we get a clap for me? Yep.

Speaker 1 I know it's a hot take. It's a bold thing to say.

Speaker 1 Popcorn, spitting on fans, throwing water bottles at fans.

Speaker 4 I disavow. What if Kyrie was really thirsty? True.
What if he had passed out and he was dehydrated and the fan was just trying to help him?

Speaker 1 Well, I wanted to actually do a follow-up on my disavow. Well, real quick.

Speaker 1 I want to do a well, but.

Speaker 4 The Wizards guy,

Speaker 4 he didn't throw anything. He just went out there and got backboard.

Speaker 1 He tried to touch net. Yeah.

Speaker 4 He got backboard, which is, that's the coolest thing that you can do.

Speaker 1 Dude, fans be acting cray cray, like officially.

Speaker 4 It's weird because, like, it makes you think that the only thing that's been stopping fans from doing any of this is just them deciding not to do it.

Speaker 4 There's really no barrier.

Speaker 4 We're trusting every single night that there are 20,000 fans in NBA arenas that are just going to all decide not to do any

Speaker 1 common sense.

Speaker 4 Like trusting 20,000 people to simultaneously have common sense. It's actually, we should be applauding NBA fans for having a great run the last 40 years by and large.

Speaker 4 It's just a minor hiccup in the couple the last couple of weeks.

Speaker 1 Yeah, you don't talk about all the times when you go on the subway and it runs perfectly. Exactly.
Or when you get on a plane and you land with no problems and no delays.

Speaker 4 I actually think that what happened tonight at the Wizards game might it might be a fantastic deterrent for other fans going on the court because you'll notice the guy that went on there, he got tackled.

Speaker 4 But what's worse than that is he had to have like a two-minute conversation with Dwight Howard.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I know.

Speaker 4 And if you, if the threat is like, be careful if you run onto a court, you might have to hang out with Grayson Allen. Right.
That's a pretty good way of making sure that fans stay away.

Speaker 4 A strong talking to.

Speaker 1 I do think that,

Speaker 1 and I know that this is going to sound like I am defending fans, which I clearly disavowed, so don't even start.

Speaker 1 But I do think the pandemic has fucked people up more than we realize, and people are just getting back into

Speaker 1 the real world and losing their fucking minds.

Speaker 4 But it's like preseason.

Speaker 1 Yes, preseason.

Speaker 1 No one knows how to act right now. Give it a couple weeks.
I do not think it's like some

Speaker 1 huge pandemic where we or epidemic where this is going to be the new norm that fans are just fucking with players constantly.

Speaker 1 I do think that it will find its equilibrium here and fans will stop being complete assholes. Again, disavow.
The Kyrie thing though, it is very weird to me that like I disavow,

Speaker 1 wholly disavow.

Speaker 1 Kyrie was trying to be an asshole to try to like fuck with the fans.

Speaker 1 He was stomping on the logo to be a dick to the fans.

Speaker 4 Are you saying there are elements of provocation?

Speaker 1 No, I'm not. I'm not.
But it is funny.

Speaker 4 It It sounds like you're blaming

Speaker 1 Smith's school out there. No.

Speaker 1 I'm doing the Dougie.

Speaker 1 You heard me disavow.

Speaker 1 No, what I'm more saying is

Speaker 1 the line of thinking, I think it's very funny to watch the media reaction.

Speaker 1 I did the disavow at the beginning because everyone is like boldly saying you shouldn't throw things at players, which I agree with and is easily the easiest thing to have in your head, right?

Speaker 1 But at the same time,

Speaker 1 Kyrie was being a dick. He was being a dick.

Speaker 4 He should never have anything.

Speaker 1 I think Kevin Durant actually summed it up perfectly. He's like, I know fans are passionate about Kyrie Irving, but that doesn't excuse you acting like that, which I completely agree with.

Speaker 1 Like, Kevin Durant nailed it, and it's just funny to watch people then say, oh, well, it's a logo. Who the fuck cares? Sports fans care.
I think that they do. They do.

Speaker 4 There's been almost too much backlash to booing.

Speaker 4 You'll notice that a lot of people in the media, they're booing people who are booing, saying that you're not allowed to boo. Booing is like the healthiest thing.

Speaker 1 We should feel free to get the fucking

Speaker 1 fuck out of it.

Speaker 4 As men, as men, a lot of times we're told to repress our emotions and to keep everything bottled up. I think you should encourage booing.
Boo and hiss. Yes, hissing.
Bring back hissing.

Speaker 4 What about how they do it over in like England? You whistle at guys. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Bring all that stuff back.

Speaker 4 You know, keep it respectful, but with a respectful level of hatred to somebody that you're actively rooting against.

Speaker 4 If you're a fan, you shouldn't have to pretend like you're cheering for everybody because that's not what fans do.

Speaker 1 Well, that was kind of my point is that I think there's a lot of people in the media who just don't, like, they don't care about sports. They don't root for a team.

Speaker 1 They don't actually understand how fans think. Like, I saw, and I love his work, but Sam Munson from Pro Football Focus was like, maybe fans just suck and we don't even need them.

Speaker 1 It's like, well, yeah, we do because fans are awesome and fans, like, you know, make the experience so much better. That guy was a fucking asshole.

Speaker 1 The guy who spit spit on Trey Young was a fucking asshole. The guy who threw popcorn at Russell Westford was a fucking asshole.
They should all never be allowed back into a game.

Speaker 1 But at the same time, I don't, I'm not going to sit here and be like, I don't, I don't totally understand why a fan would be like, I don't like Kyrie Irving.

Speaker 1 It's cool to not like Kyrie Irving if you're a Celtics fan and to boo him. Don't throw shit, but boo him.

Speaker 4 So I think we predicted this on last Friday's show or last Wednesday's show.

Speaker 1 I'm going to level it up.

Speaker 4 I'm going to say by the time you're hearing my voice, if it's in the afternoon tomorrow, or I guess that would be Tuesday

Speaker 4 today, if it's in the afternoon, somebody will have already written the take that sports were better when there were no fans in the building. Correct.

Speaker 4 That timeline has been accelerated over the weekend to a dramatic effect.

Speaker 1 And you know what? That person who writes that is not a fan of a team and doesn't go to sporting events.

Speaker 1 Like, I can guarantee you that they are basically so removed from the heart and soul of sports and what it means to be a fan that they can basically say, who who the fuck cares the logo?

Speaker 1 Again, don't throw shit. Who the fuck cares the logo? Guess what? Fans care about that shit.

Speaker 1 They put time, money, effort, all these things, an inordinate amount. You can say it's unhealthy.
I'd probably agree with you. Into their teams.
So of course they care. Caring is cool.

Speaker 1 It's cool to care.

Speaker 4 It's also funny, though, that part of the argument is like, he stepped on our cartoon man's feet. Of course.

Speaker 4 But that's what makes sports fun. Right.
I'm not aware that people are actually getting mad about that. It's It's totally irrational, but I get it.

Speaker 1 When you remove players, too. Right,

Speaker 1 but when you remove yourself from all of it, it does seem ridiculous. But then when you sit there and you're like, Hank, you don't like Kyrie Irving because of what he did to the Celtics, right?

Speaker 1 Right. Like, so it, it, it makes sense.
There's history there, and then he, he clearly did that on purpose.

Speaker 2 When no one else, when no Celtics was on the floor, too. It was like after timeout, he looked around, made sure no one was around.

Speaker 1 It was like a very childish movie. It was.

Speaker 1 Again, look at the video. Again, I can't say it enough.
Disavowed the fan. But do you think that Kyrie Irving was doing that just for no reason?

Speaker 1 He was doing it to piss people off, to piss the Celtics fans.

Speaker 4 I like that he did that.

Speaker 1 Right, it's great. It's all good, yeah.
Dude, it's great to have this type of animosity. As long as it stays

Speaker 1 civil in terms of fan interaction with players, animosity in sports is fun. It makes it fun.
It raises the stakes. Again, Kevin Durant absolutely nailed it.

Speaker 1 He was like, they're very passionate about Kyrie Irving, but you cannot do that because you're a fucking fool.

Speaker 4 I just think that

Speaker 4 I'm a little bit worried because I think that as a nation, we're about to lose our drinking privileges. Oh, I think that that's going to be another

Speaker 4 stadiums?

Speaker 1 You can't, yeah,

Speaker 4 it's going to be like EPL.

Speaker 4 It's going to be like EPL where you can drink, but especially in the NBA, because the players control the league, so the players in the offseason could get together.

Speaker 4 You know, that LeBron James, by the way, is very mad that nobody has thrown like a hot dog at him because he would like to lead the forefront of like the players need to take control of this mess right now.

Speaker 4 And if something bad happens, if like LeBron gets hit with a soda, there's going to be a talk this offseason of like in the EPL, you're only allowed to serve beer in the concourse area.

Speaker 4 You can't bring it to the seat. It's like discouraging drink.
Overall, this is not just an NBA.

Speaker 1 There's no way it's going to happen. This money out of the players.
This is an American issue.

Speaker 4 I'm worried that we're going to lose our drinking privileges. You already can't drink on Southwest Airlines.

Speaker 1 You can't.

Speaker 4 They stopped serving hard liquor on JetBlue. I dealt with that this weekend.
That was my cross to bear. It It was tough for me.
I'm just saying, like, please don't do that.

Speaker 1 It's not going to happen because it's money out of their pockets. Like, that would be, that would, that's direct money out of their pocket.

Speaker 1 I honestly think this is just a weird moment in time where people have lost their mind and they should be publicly shunned and banned from all these games. And if arrested, sure.

Speaker 1 Charged definitely. Like, you can't throw shit at people, but

Speaker 1 there's, I don't know. I think people are just losing their mind right now.

Speaker 4 I also have noticed that every time something weird happens, it's usually Kevin Harlan announcing it. And then you get the replay with Kevin Harlan doing like the play-by-play for it.

Speaker 4 I feel like maybe, I don't know, I don't want to say Kevin Harlan has something to do with it, but it's like the Rob Schneider oil spill thing.

Speaker 4 Like every time something like this happens, Kevin Harlan's voice is there. Like is he or is he right now on the phone with like the Texans and the Jaguars?

Speaker 4 And being like, hey, if Mattress Mac could get nude and climb up the uprights during a game so I could announce it, maybe we can get a few more clicks.

Speaker 1 Yeah, he does have like a great fan on the field voice, and he does a great job of doing it.

Speaker 2 What were you going to say, Hank?

Speaker 2 I was going to say, since the kid that threw the water bottle got charged with like assault with a deadly weapon or whatever, does that mean McGregor should post mostly get charged with assault for throwing the water bottle at Nate Diaz?

Speaker 1 Ooh. Or when Steph Curry went through his mouthpiece.

Speaker 4 Steph Curry started this throwing his mouthpiece at a fan.

Speaker 4 He's going to kill somebody.

Speaker 1 I mean, I also think that we should, I was half joking on Friday, but now that there's been more interactions, we really should implement like players get to beat the fuck out of one fan a year.

Speaker 1 It really would

Speaker 1 stop a lot of this.

Speaker 4 We'd be running out of player fights by now.

Speaker 1 I know, but it really would stop a lot of this. And people are, I think people are just fucking losing their mind.
Anyway, let's talk about the actual game.

Speaker 4 What about this? What if you just put the player that threw the water bottle at center court before the next game?

Speaker 4 You put him like on a leash, and then you just let everybody in the arena throw their water bottles at him.

Speaker 1 With, yeah, like in

Speaker 1 that old lottery. I think it was WCW clip, maybe, when everyone just started throwing chairs on that one guy, and there was just everyone threw their chairs in.

Speaker 1 That should, yeah, fill up all the water bottles with pennies and have them, and he gets to keep the money at the end.

Speaker 4 We are literally discussing the plot of the lottery.

Speaker 1 Yeah, that's fine. That's fine.
I mean, it's a great story. Teaches us all.

Speaker 4 You know, I mean, this never would have happened in a Wizards game if Trevoris Crittenden and Gilbert Arias were still on the team.

Speaker 1 That's true.

Speaker 4 You would not want to step on that course.

Speaker 1 That's true. All right, let's talk about the games, though, because we shouldn't let this.

Speaker 4 We disavow.

Speaker 1 All right? Don't be an idiot. Boo, hiss,

Speaker 1 boo, and hiss. Whistle.

Speaker 1 Reply to their Twitter and be like, I hate you, but don't do anything that makes you look like a fucking asshole. Make a sign.

Speaker 4 Make a sign. Yeah, bring back.

Speaker 1 Old school signs. Yeah.
Yeah, Hank.

Speaker 1 Make a customized jersey. Burn a jersey in your backyard in the comfort of your own home.

Speaker 4 Do a Photoshop where you put their face on a baby's body. Yeah.

Speaker 1 There's a lot of ways to express yourself, but throwing shit at players and spitting on players.

Speaker 1 And the one in Utah was actually weirdly like, that was maybe the worst where they basically were going after John Morant's family. That was so fucked up.

Speaker 2 And in the Bruins game, when Posternach was getting pelted with hats.

Speaker 1 Yeah, that's true.

Speaker 1 Yeah, that's true.

Speaker 4 They would never throw things on the court in hockey.

Speaker 1 Yeah,

Speaker 1 rats, octopuses, squid, yeah. All right, let's talk about the games.

Speaker 1 All right, let's start with this one, the Nets Celtics game. Holy fuck, the Nets are so scary when they decide.
They had like a fuck you mode to them that

Speaker 1 similar to when the Warriors are really cooking and they're like, hey, we're just not going to miss any shots and just score every single time and there's nothing you can do about it.

Speaker 1 The big four scored 106 points. That's Blake Griffin, Kevin Durant, James Harden, and Kyrie Irving.
Kevin Durant was 14 for 20. And I,

Speaker 1 I mean, it's going to be interesting. I actually think like the NBA playoffs are fascinating this year because the Celtics are obviously not the team to beat the Nets.

Speaker 1 But like when they get into a series against the Bucs or a series against the Sixers, if Embiid is healthy, what's going to happen? Because they just look unstoppable when they want to be unstoppable.

Speaker 4 And I think Blake Griffin, I think he might have led the team in offensive rebounding, too. So that's big.
You get those second-chance points.

Speaker 1 They do, but he was close.

Speaker 4 He was one-off.

Speaker 1 He was one off the team. He had the least amount of fouls by the starters, so he has nice.

Speaker 1 Here we go.

Speaker 1 There we go.

Speaker 4 Double sportsmanship by Blake Griffin in that game. I'm proud of you, Blake.

Speaker 1 He was actually a plus 12, and Kevin Durant was only a plus three.

Speaker 4 Yeah, and Joe Harris was a plus 17.

Speaker 4 So, guest on part of my take

Speaker 4 had an average of

Speaker 1 29.

Speaker 1 What's that average?

Speaker 4 A cumulative plus 14 and a half.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 4 A net average there. That's pretty impressive.

Speaker 4 Yeah, so the Nets do have that element to them, which is like the Warriors, where they can come out and just have a sick third quarter and just dominate you.

Speaker 4 They're able to separate so quickly.

Speaker 4 Hank, do you think that the Celtics take another game?

Speaker 1 No. No, that's it.
I think it's over. That was it.

Speaker 1 Jason Tatum was.

Speaker 1 That was his MJ game. Yeah, that was an incredible game that he had on whatever it was, Friday night.

Speaker 4 He had 50, right? Is that my?

Speaker 1 Yeah, that's mine. Yeah, he had 50.

Speaker 2 Tim is not playing. I mean, the starting lineup, it's one of those things where it doesn't matter.
You could play those starting two lineups 100 times, and the Celtics might win one.

Speaker 1 Is this the end for Marcus Smart?

Speaker 2 People are saying that.

Speaker 4 Are you sad about it?

Speaker 2 Some people are saying that.

Speaker 2 I am sad about it. It's one of those things.

Speaker 2 I was talking to a friend over the weekend, and he was saying that, you know, they need to get rid of him because they need Tatum to step up and be and be the leader.

Speaker 2 And with Marcus Smart there, like, he's always going to be the vocal captain guy. And if they want to take the next step, it just can't be him, which kind of makes sense.

Speaker 2 Hopefully, they can get some good, you know, good assets for him. But I always loved him.
I think he's a great player.

Speaker 4 So, Hank, if you're GM, GM Lockwood over there, what pieces do the Celtics need?

Speaker 2 They need like, you know, like a Kevin Durant, James Harden. I don't know.
It's tough to say because it's just all superstars.

Speaker 1 Maybe Kyrie will compete with the Nets.

Speaker 2 Yeah, they compete with the Nets or the Lakers. Like, you need another bona fide superstar who that is and how they get them.
I don't really know.

Speaker 1 The Marcus Smart thing, though, we should do this for Mount Rushmore's season, the Mount Rushmore of like players you rooted for that weren't like great, but you, in your mind, they're like Hall of Famers.

Speaker 1 In your mind. You know what I mean? Like in 20 years, you'll be like, Marcus Smart, and then someone will go look up his stats and be like, what? What are you talking about?

Speaker 1 Like, Kyle Schwarber's that for me. Like, I'll be like, yeah, Kyle Schwarber, Hall of Famer.

Speaker 2 Tom Wilson.

Speaker 1 And you look it up. He's like, wait, he was 230 hitter.

Speaker 4 Yeah.

Speaker 4 Every team in the league would love to play.

Speaker 1 But every sports fan has those guys who you're like, you just, you care about them so much, even if they aren't an all-star even though they're an MCP. Yeah.
Yeah, exactly.

Speaker 1 Yeah, this series is over. Can we call it over? 100%.
It's over. I actually think the Nets will try to score 200 points on Tuesday or whatever it is.

Speaker 1 Kyrie Irving might score 70, just to prove a point. Don't throw shit at players.
Wait, disavow. This next game.
How brave is that by me?

Speaker 4 This next game is going back to Jersey, right? Or going back to Brooklyn.

Speaker 1 Come on, dude. Sorry.

Speaker 1 Brooklyn stand up.

Speaker 1 Sorry, fucking Michael Strahan was at the game.

Speaker 4 Sorry, Mayor de Blasio.

Speaker 1 How could he? Come on, man.

Speaker 1 All right, so they're going to match up against the Bucs who

Speaker 1 proved that the Heat were bubble frogs. Is that what we're calling them? Well, they're a bubble team.

Speaker 4 They're a bubble team. And outside of the bubble, there are too many families around.

Speaker 1 Also,

Speaker 4 they thrive in a culture where it's just the dudes.

Speaker 1 Drew holiday is also very, very good, and that changes a lot for the Bucs.

Speaker 4 It also seems like maybe we should have respected the Bucs more.

Speaker 1 Well, I'm so mad at myself for not

Speaker 1 see this coming where the Bucs... when they were the last couple of years, when they were the one seed and Giannis won the MVP, and everyone was talking them up.

Speaker 1 That is when they're destined to fail and fail spectacularly. This year, everyone kind of wrote them off, especially with the Sixers being the one seed and the Nets being the Nets.

Speaker 1 And it's like, oh, yeah, they still are pretty damn good.

Speaker 1 And they're a team that has won a lot of games in the last three four years i'm very much looking forward to that series i i think that the bucks are for real i really do i think that's like when they have so when they have a good number two like that's been the question it was always like is chris middleton going to be this guy yeah and now that they have like what appears to be they've almost got a big three they've got a medium three they've got a medium three i also shout out the bucks twitter i thought it was very well done uh usually they'll you know teams will do the old takes expose and they'll only do the uh talking heads of the the world.

Speaker 1 They'll do like Nick Wright and Skip Bayless and all these people. The Bucks did just reply guys and I fucking loved it.

Speaker 1 It was just Heat fans replying to the Bucks Twitter account being like Heat and five, Heat and six, Heat Culture, and they did an entire collage of it and it was so fun.

Speaker 4 Should they not have included the handles of everybody that replied? Was that not inviting harassment to them?

Speaker 1 Oh, interesting. Good point, PFD.

Speaker 4 Be better, Bucks.

Speaker 1 Yeah, but I thought it was nice to just give a little shine to the, you know, the people who have three followers.

Speaker 2 yeah burner tyler hero there were a shitload of burners that were in those replies and it was like yeah this is what we do yeah jimmy butler is their avatar and they're just replying to everything i liked it did you see the carolina panthers i mean carolina hurricanes after the predators game no i just sent you the tweet it was a tweet of the banners it said one of the banners said taylor luan crushed a beer the other one said creed played during intermission And the other one said second loudest house in the NHL.

Speaker 2 So that was another good social media roast thing by the team.

Speaker 1 That was well done. Well done.

Speaker 1 All right.

Speaker 1 Let's stick with the East.

Speaker 4 By the way, if you're going to have Creed play at your sporting event, you have to have some guy come down from the rafters draped in that ribbon like they did at the halftime show on Thanksgiving in Dallas.

Speaker 4 It's not really a Creed performance unless you think somebody might just fall from the rafters and land on the ice.

Speaker 1 Kind of sad how far Creed has fallen from going Thanksgiving at the Cowboys game to like basically houseband. First

Speaker 1 of all, they were.

Speaker 1 Yeah, that was like the guitarist guitarist you ignore playing at like lunch hour at Pop Belly's. Yeah.
Was just freed. I know.
Those guys. Very sad.
Yeah. Yeah.
All right, let's stay in the east.

Speaker 4 Are you a clap for the Popbellies guitarist?

Speaker 1 Yeah, you got to give them a bunch. You have to throw them a couple bucks.
You have to, yeah. Yeah.
If you make eye contact, you always have to give money to a street performer.

Speaker 1 It's all about the eye contact. If you can avoid eye contact, you can keep on walking.

Speaker 2 Way and the hen and cameras, remember?

Speaker 1 Yeah, I'm also be jewels.

Speaker 1 I'm terrified.

Speaker 4 I know that at some point I'm going to end up in a viral video where it's like I'm walking past Yo-Yo Ma playing playing the cello and he's like dressed up in some like weird outfit on the subway.

Speaker 4 It's like, look at this guy that won't even recognize the best music by the best artist.

Speaker 1 I don't think he has to dress up for me to not recognize him.

Speaker 4 Yo-Yo Ma? Yeah.

Speaker 4 I don't know. You'd be surprised.

Speaker 1 No.

Speaker 4 If you saw Yo-Yo Ma playing the cello, if you walked past a guy who was really good at the cello and he looked like Yo-Yo Ma, you would probably

Speaker 1 is that Yo-Yo Ma. I don't know if I could...
I don't know what Yo-Yo Ma looks like off the top of my head. All right, let's stay in the east.

Speaker 4 Anybody playing the cello could be Yo-Yo Ma.

Speaker 1 Yo-Yo Yama, yeah. The Wizards,

Speaker 1 gentleman sweep is coming.

Speaker 4 Yeah, so got that one win.

Speaker 1 Yeah, that's all that matters. Well, the crowd got hyped.

Speaker 4 It does matter about Joel and Biad's knee.

Speaker 1 So,

Speaker 1 I don't want to do this to myself again, but I am.

Speaker 1 I don't think he hurt his knee. I think he hurt his ass slash back.
He grabbed his back. He fell on his back.

Speaker 1 His back has been bothering him all year.

Speaker 4 He grabbed his back, but he also grabbed the back of his leg.

Speaker 1 his this is this drew breeze ribs all over and joel and bead's back is hurt the knee buckled a little bit no his back is hurt you saw you saw the shock wave go up through his knee when he landed it's his back he hurt his back i think his back is hurt okay and his ass tailbone uh i

Speaker 1 what does football doc say about sixers fans who are freaking out um just Tell yourself that Joe and Biad was like, you know what, let's get more revenue for the league and we'll go five.

Speaker 1 So sit out the second half. This is, honestly, though, for Sixers fans, this is as much of a disaster as possible if Joel and Beats actually hurt.

Speaker 2 In a series that you're going to win 4-1, there's still going to be so many conversations coming out just about Ben Simmons free throw shooting just from that one game alone that it's a somehow you won the series 4-1 and it's going to be a loss.

Speaker 1 Hack of Simmons

Speaker 4 just saw that Davis Bertens is out for probably the rest of the series. He's got a cash strain.

Speaker 1 After his Tony Snow line.

Speaker 4 Well, he had even better than his Tony Snow line because I think he had like five fouls. He had six fouls.

Speaker 1 He said he fouled out. Yeah.

Speaker 4 Did I ever tell you about the time I set my youth league record for the quickest foul out? No.

Speaker 1 Well, actually, I think you have, but television.

Speaker 4 I think it was just about two minutes. I fouled out in two minutes of the game.
That's zero points.

Speaker 4 But to be fair, like one of them was a technical foul that I got for yelling at the ref after he called me for a foul that I did not commit. It was all ball.
Everybody knew it.

Speaker 4 But I still think I hold that record to this day. That's

Speaker 1 friendship. Yeah.

Speaker 4 According to Shams, Laker star Anthony Davis is unlikely to play. Yeah.
And wait, there was something that was just posted about Joelle and Biad being likely to play.

Speaker 1 This is a disaster. This is threat level midnight for Sixers fans.
The good news is you should be able to beat the Hawks or the Knicks. It's going to be the Hawks.

Speaker 1 Maybe without them. Maybe.
Maybe not.

Speaker 2 Shout out to all the Knicks fans who got mad for me calling them cute when they won.

Speaker 1 Let's talk about the Knicks.

Speaker 2 And then we're chanting, we want the Nets.

Speaker 1 Let's talk about the Knicks for a while.

Speaker 2 And then they're just getting, they've lost two games by 40 points.

Speaker 1 I feel

Speaker 1 bad for Knicks fans. They're cute.

Speaker 1 It's cute. It is cute, big cat.

Speaker 1 I feel bad for them because they're going through something that I went through.

Speaker 1 And I tweeted about it during game two, and I had a lot of Knicks fans yell at me and tell me that I was premature, but it's pretty much exactly what I said in that Tom Thibodeau is a fantastic coach, and he will always get your team to overachieve and play to their max ability during the regular season.

Speaker 1 And then when you get to the postseason, there's no extra gear. Now, the Knicks aren't like, they weren't supposed to be here, so it's a little different.

Speaker 1 They're a flawed roster, but he also played Julius Randle the most minutes of anyone in the NBA this year. The most minutes.

Speaker 1 It's always going to go like this when you do that with your quote-unquote star player who can't figure out a double team, has been shooting terribly.

Speaker 4 He does look tired.

Speaker 4 He looks tired at the start of every game.

Speaker 1 Yeah, and

Speaker 1 he's.

Speaker 1 It also was like super flashbacks when the Knicks were down, I think, 15 or something, and Julius Randle was still in the game, and like that's when Derrick Rose got hurt. Like,

Speaker 1 this is Tom Thibodeau. Like, he's a great coach, but until it works in the playoffs, and again, they're a flawed roster, so they weren't even supposed to be here.

Speaker 4 Counterpoint, they're going back to the garden, yeah, they are going back to.

Speaker 1 I love this series.

Speaker 4 We're going to the garden in this. I want to see as many garden games as possible.

Speaker 1 And I love this series because there is, like, it feels like there's real animosity. Trey Young has been incredible.
He scored, I think, 30, 33, 35, 35, 37. And

Speaker 1 Trey Young has like, you know how

Speaker 1 for a baseball team, when players have handshakes with each different player, so they have like 15 different handshakes, Trey Young has a celebration for like each type of play.

Speaker 1 Like a long three, he has a celebration. A sick assist, he has a celebration.
He's averaging 10 assists in this series.

Speaker 1 You know, a play at the hoop, he's got a celebration. I love it.
He's got so many fucking celebrations.

Speaker 4 If you're a Knicks fan you have to move on

Speaker 4 an important thing about this game is you need to know when to get off of a take and so far the you're going bald takes have actually been counterproductive for you yes so it's it was a good opportunity to see how it would impact him it turns out it just makes him pissed off which makes him better yeah so it's having the opposite effect that you want you got to find something else to make fun of trey young for yeah i don't know what else you can do when he just scorches your team every single game yeah like don't spit on him anymore he obviously doesn't like that.

Speaker 1 He spells his name like an asshole. It should be T-R-E-Y.
Yes, yeah.

Speaker 1 Especially a basketball.

Speaker 4 Two vowels in a row.

Speaker 1 Right, but like Trey, you're shooting threes.

Speaker 1 I don't know. But yeah, I like this series.
You can also tell, I can always tell the temperature of a series if I tweet anything and it could be totally neutral. about a game.

Speaker 1 Like I was saying on whatever day they played, Trey Young was talking so much shit, and he was missing his 40-footers, which he loves to take.

Speaker 1 I was like, if he hits any of these in this game, the shit talking is going to go to a different level. And I had Knicks and Hawks fans mad at me, and that just shows you how on edge everyone is.

Speaker 1 And I love that.

Speaker 4 Did you see the pregame trick shot that he was doing where he was like bouncing the ball off the other ball? And then in between bounces, he would shoot it.

Speaker 4 And he was sitting down on the bench and just sank a three as he was juggling a basketball using another basketball to shoot. So

Speaker 1 is he officially the poor man's Steph Curry? Yes.

Speaker 4 That is very much a Steph Curry thing. Yeah.
I think he wants to be Steph Curry.

Speaker 1 I think, well, want to be Steph Curry. I do too.
Want to be Steph. Yeah, everyone should want to be Steph Curry.

Speaker 1 All right. So that's the East.

Speaker 4 I want to be Phoenix son.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Get your dick sucked.
Let's talk about them. So

Speaker 1 I am back to now believing that the Lakers could lose this series. Oh, absolutely.
Because of Anthony Davis.

Speaker 1 It's Anthony Davis' team. When Anthony Davis goes off the floor and KCP got hurt too, it was really bad watching the Lakers play offense.
And I,

Speaker 1 oh, man,

Speaker 1 I think, what are your guys' predictions real quick for game five, which is Tuesday night?

Speaker 1 Our next show won't be till Friday. I think we're going to get like a vintage, vintage LeBron just every single way.

Speaker 4 We keep waiting for that. 30.

Speaker 1 This is it. 38,

Speaker 1 12, and 8.

Speaker 4 Oh, it's going to be one of those stat lines where Nick Wright will be like, no player has had this exact

Speaker 4 one of those weird, like, no player since like Michael Jordan has ever done this in the playoffs.

Speaker 1 I don't know.

Speaker 4 I like the Suns. Now, I got in trouble the last time I said that because I was very, very wrong about what was a game two, but I feel like I'm going to bet on the Suns again.

Speaker 1 Well, I mean, without Anthony Davis, it's a totally different team. Shout out Mark Jackson, who at the end of the game was like, I don't think Anthony Davis makes a difference in this game.

Speaker 1 He's like, what? Okay.

Speaker 1 Anthony Davis.

Speaker 1 However you want to rank them is probably a top five player in the NBA. He doesn't make a difference.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 1 DeAndre Ayton, though, has been incredible. And I wanted to...
The only thing I'm worried about with DeAndre Ayton is he's got Greg Odin like, this guy looks 10 years older than he is face.

Speaker 4 Yeah, he looks a little bit like Adam.

Speaker 4 He looks like Abraham Lincoln. He's aging rapidly.
But he's dunking. Like, the dunks are just unreal.
Like, I think he's probably shooting.

Speaker 1 81%.

Speaker 4 Okay, I was going to guess between 80 and 90% of the infield. And the vast majority of those are just yams.

Speaker 4 They're not doing a good job of defending him inside. But yeah, he's fun to watch.

Speaker 4 He's still at that age where he's usually the biggest player on the court, and he's jumping higher than anybody on the court, and you just can't stop that dunk. Yes.
You can't defend it.

Speaker 2 PFT has a LeBron stand.

Speaker 2 When you see Chris Paul do dirty plays like he did on Kyle Kuzma, like trip him, knock him down.

Speaker 2 Do you wish that LeBron would speak out? Like they're best friends, and LeBron's never really mentioned how dirty of a player he is. And he's going after his own guys right now.

Speaker 4 Oh, Chris Paul, but some things are bigger than your NBA. He's a country first guy, and so they play USA basketball together.
So that's a bond that's tough to break.

Speaker 4 They do it for the glory of the country. So you're essentially asking him to commit treason.
So, no, I do stand with LeBron on that.

Speaker 1 Do you think LeBron, that cheap shot he took where he pushed someone in the back and then didn't get back on defense to end the game?

Speaker 2 What do you think? That was vintage LeBron.

Speaker 1 That was.

Speaker 2 But that's the thing where it's like,

Speaker 1 it's one after the other.

Speaker 2 It's a vintage LeBron where it's like he gets up.

Speaker 1 You get a playoff foul.

Speaker 2 You get your hopes up. The sons have a chance.

Speaker 1 And then he's back and drops like a 50. I know.
That's why I'm fully ready for game five to be vintage, vintage LeBron.

Speaker 4 I would not be surprised if LeBron just grabbed the back of his neck and looked around up in the arena and just pointed up at a fan and be like, went over to Ref. It was like, hey, somebody

Speaker 4 with like a disappearing Skittle.

Speaker 1 Maybe he's going to go with the old... Remember when

Speaker 1 Laser Beam, what was it? What were they called?

Speaker 4 The Laser Beam. Yeah, the Laser Beam.

Speaker 1 What? The Laser Beams. Laser Pointer.
Thank you. It's cats freaky.
Almost midnight. Laser Pointer.
He's definitely going to say Laser Pointer was in his eye. Laser Pointers had a moment.

Speaker 1 Remember that? And like probably about 15 years ago, people would bring them to games and try to get people.

Speaker 4 There was one, I think, at an NFL game. I want to say the Raiders were playing in it.
And maybe Derek Carr got lasered. Or it might have been who's the quarterback from Michigan State? Yeah.

Speaker 1 He played for them for a while. Connor Cook.

Speaker 4 Connor Cook, yeah, I think Connor Cook got lasered. We haven't seen one of those.

Speaker 4 LeBron might send like Bronny Jr.

Speaker 1 That was a great that was a great urban legend that a laser pointer could like burn your eye out.

Speaker 1 Don't point that at me. It could totally happen.
Happened to Brady, too.

Speaker 1 That happened to him? Yeah.

Speaker 4 That was probably just somebody with a gun.

Speaker 1 April 2019. AFC Championship game.
Someone laser pointed at him? See,

Speaker 1 that's the type of fan stuff. I'm not condoning that, but if you're thinking water bottle or spit versus laser pointer, go with laser pointer.
Then get kicked out that way.

Speaker 2 His face is up to a year in jail. Oh, my God.
Or fine up to that year.

Speaker 1 Don't do that. Do not.

Speaker 4 It's honestly funny if it's not on their face. If it's like on their nipple, that's hilarious.

Speaker 1 It's actually, now that I'm thinking about it, it's like super scary. Yeah, like it could be a gun.
Don't do it. I've actually thought, I've thought this all the way through.

Speaker 1 Do not laser point anyone ever.

Speaker 1 Do you flashlight? I had a thought. Do you think LeBron's sneaky, like, deep down in places he doesn't talk about?

Speaker 1 A little jealous of Anthony Davis because he actually gets injured? Yeah, probably. Like, he's like, damn.

Speaker 4 Calls him a drama queen.

Speaker 1 Come on, man. I really wish it should have been, he whispers into his ear, like, should have been me.
I should have been the one who got this injury.

Speaker 4 I think it's not unlikely. You know who needs to step up is Caruso.
Caruso, he's now, the pendulum has swung on the Caruso pendulum, where now he's overrated. So it needs to swing back the other way.

Speaker 4 He needs to have one of those games where he comes out there and silences. Maybe he has a nice chase-down block and increases the value of his old NFTs.
He's got that.

Speaker 4 Do you think that between LeBron and Caruso, like there is

Speaker 4 a little bit of animosity that Caruso is like, I'm just going to shave my head because I'm going bald and this is the good move to do. And LeBron's like, oh man, why did he do that?

Speaker 4 Is he trying to say that I should?

Speaker 1 Yes, he's sending me a message. Yeah, exactly.

Speaker 4 I think that there might be something to that because, like, Caruso is probably two seasons overdue for that. Yes.
LeBron was, he's like a decade past that point now.

Speaker 1 Yes. All right.
Well, the good news is for all you Laker fans, you can just hop to the Clippers because they're back.

Speaker 1 Two and two on the Mavs.

Speaker 1 What is going on with Luca in the free throws?

Speaker 4 I've got two Luca takes.

Speaker 1 He's 41% from free throw. Yeah.

Speaker 4 And he's scoring like 35 points a game.

Speaker 4 I've been sitting on this take for a while with Luca in particular because he's not a terrible free throw shooter overall, but he's had a lot of moments where he just can't do it, especially late in games in the playoffs.

Speaker 4 I think he practices shooting threes way too much.

Speaker 4 It's the Steph Curry effect. He doesn't have a mid-range shot.
He should do 15-footer.

Speaker 1 From free throw line, he should do like a step back. Yes.
Yeah.

Speaker 4 He should dribble between his legs.

Speaker 1 A fade away.

Speaker 4 Do the Hesi to the ref. Make sure it's under 10 seconds.
And then, yeah, a full-on jump shot, jump backwards and shoot it. That's take number one.
Take number two on Luca. This is a little spicy.

Speaker 4 I think Luca is older than we think he is.

Speaker 1 Ooh. I think it's like

Speaker 4 it's a Danny Elmonte Alfonso Soriano thing. I don't think Luca is 22 years old.

Speaker 4 I think Luca is probably 27, 28 years old.

Speaker 1 You can do anything.

Speaker 4 If you're a player that's not born in the United States and you come over, there's a lot of paperwork that can get either lost or changed very easily. And I'm not saying I wouldn't do it.

Speaker 4 I probably would if I was Luca 2.

Speaker 1 But that's...

Speaker 1 Hasn't he been like a hasn't he played in a major league since he was like 16 years old?

Speaker 4 Yeah, but he was actually 21.

Speaker 1 Got it. See?

Speaker 4 You can take the clock back as long as you want.

Speaker 1 But he looked very young when he was playing. Yeah.

Speaker 4 But even in like when he was playing against eight-year-olds, he was probably 12.

Speaker 1 He's been like documented all the way along. I don't think that's a big cat.
It's probably wrong, but it's still fun to think about. Yeah, I agree.
Why is Lee Harvey Oswald trending right now?

Speaker 4 Yeah, bad tweets.

Speaker 1 Yeah, cancel that ass.

Speaker 4 I think because somebody was getting sent

Speaker 1 to Congress people.

Speaker 4 Somebody was getting Congress people to retweet a picture of their uncle that was in the Marines because Lee Harvey Oswald was a Marine.

Speaker 1 Oh, my God.

Speaker 4 Yeah, and so. Jesus Christ.

Speaker 2 Lucas said he has a nerve strain, by the way. Oh, but that it's not the reason why he played shooting shooting free throws back.

Speaker 1 I like that. Just throwing that that actually

Speaker 2 knowledge is nerve issue, but downplays impact.

Speaker 1 When we do that as a troll, when we're like, hey, just a reminder, like, if Brooks wins, he wins, and if he loses, it's because his knees hurt. But Luca's doing that for real.

Speaker 2 Yeah, usually, like, hockey players, they do it after the series, and you can, like, say it after the fact, like, oh, he had a broken leg, so that's why they lost.

Speaker 1 Also, a nerve is doing it in real time.

Speaker 4 A nerve is something that's completely impossible to prove, unless you're the player himself that can feel it. You just be like, I'm dealing with a nerve issue.

Speaker 4 I'm dealing with numbness in my shooting hand right now.

Speaker 1 Unbelievable. 41%.
That's crazy for someone that's good. He's that good at shooting.
He's shooting 41%.

Speaker 1 But yeah, I don't know. That's a weird series because I feel like now

Speaker 1 the Clippers were dead and now they're... It feels like they're going to win the next two.

Speaker 4 So I've got two competing thoughts in my head in this series. One is I want to see the Clippers continue to collapse because it just keeps justifying the take of like blow this team up.

Speaker 4 They can't win.

Speaker 1 They're frauds. There's still enough time for that in the second round, but yeah.

Speaker 4 Right, this would be a fraudulent move of a team to lose like this when you're stacked up.

Speaker 4 And then the other competing thought, which is I want to see them play the Lakers because, again, we were promised that series a couple years ago.

Speaker 1 Right, right. Battle of L.A., Rage Against the Machine.

Speaker 1 The other series that are going out west, I got to admit, I only have so many hours that I can stay up. So Nuggets and Jazz or sorry, yeah, Nuggets and uh

Speaker 1 uh blazers I watched the game that was the middle of the day Saturday there's been so many games uh that series is fun but I don't I don't have a read on it so I'm being honest with the audience I'm lonely we're Nuggets fans but also Blazers fans we're blazers I think I'm a Blazers fan I think we're rooting for the series yeah I think we're just rooting for the series I'm rooting for the series to be over with nobody to get hurt and seven games move on and then lose to either the Lakers or the Mafers later we will be rooting for whoever wins this series you know what I want to see the winner of this series play against the winner of the Utah Memphis series.

Speaker 1 Yes.

Speaker 4 And then that's another series we don't have to pay that close of attention to.

Speaker 1 Yeah, if the Nuggets played the Jazz, it would solve a lot of the problems in my head.

Speaker 4 It really would.

Speaker 1 It would just clear up.

Speaker 1 It might bring it up again.

Speaker 4 It might make your problems worse because you're like, I don't know which team is which.

Speaker 1 I mean, we talked about this last year, but it stands true. Like, the Nuggets and the Jazz are the same team.
They just are. They just always are.

Speaker 4 They both occupy the central or the mountain time zone? Yeah. Right.
Are they the only two teams that play in the mountain time?

Speaker 1 You can switch Donovan Mitchell and Jamal Murray teams, and I wouldn't know.

Speaker 4 You could, yeah, you could switch a lot. I mean, I do like watching Jokic.
I like Jokic. He's the best.
He's a thick little boy. Dude, he is the best.

Speaker 4 He's also older than you think he is.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Jokic and I mean, this series actually has like some of the best players to watch in terms of Dame and Jokic.
And then the Jazz, Grizzlies, Jazz are going to beat them.

Speaker 1 That was fun that the Grizzlies had one game.

Speaker 4 Our friend Sam Schwartzeen actually did the research. We talked about this on the last show about how it feels like every NBA team has a basketball in their logo.

Speaker 4 He looked it up, and 20 NBA teams have a basketball in their primary logo to remind you what sport they play. And the NFL only has three.
Major League Baseball has nine, and NHL has only four.

Speaker 4 So it is an NBA thing where

Speaker 4 we need to

Speaker 4 reinforce the brain.

Speaker 1 I saw someone tweeting that every team has to have at least one logo, alternate logo as well. That has a ball and it has a ball.

Speaker 4 That's a rule that David Stern created back in the day, R.I.P.I.P.

Speaker 1 That's crazy. He died? Yeah.

Speaker 4 R.I.P. Moment of Silence.

Speaker 1 Just kidding.

Speaker 4 I knew he was dead.

Speaker 1 That was it. What's Blake's show called? Double Cross.
Double Cross. A Double Cross Your Asses.

Speaker 4 There was a.

Speaker 1 I thought I didn't know David Stern was.

Speaker 4 It's always funny whenever we say that David Stern is running the NBA. There'll be like a new batch of five people that have never listened to this podcast.

Speaker 1 What the fuck?

Speaker 4 You guys don't know who runs?

Speaker 4 Yeah. We know it's LeBron.

Speaker 4 There's nothing funnier than a shockingly short moment of silence.

Speaker 1 Yes. I also, I am, you know, stupid things make me laugh, puke videos, whatnot.
But when someone yells something super inappropriate during a moment of silence, it usually makes me laugh.

Speaker 1 I'm sorry. It's just, it just does.
I apologize in advance.

Speaker 1 Do you want to do some NHL talk? Before we do that, though. Yeah.

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Speaker 1 Hank, what are you getting, Jake, from Father's Day?

Speaker 2 Nothing. Good one.
So funny.

Speaker 1 That's a good question.

Speaker 1 Jake, we're going to talk about your viral video soon. You ready for it?

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 4 I'm always ready for it.

Speaker 1 All right, let's talk some puck. Let's talk some puck.
We did a return of the Big Mad for our Leaf fan AWLs. The Leafs are maybe the saddest franchise ever.

Speaker 4 It's tough.

Speaker 4 Right now, Big Mad is trending in Toronto.

Speaker 4 That's how they are.

Speaker 7 It's been

Speaker 4 6,251 days days since the Maple Leafs have won a playoff series.

Speaker 1 They haven't won a playoff series since 2004. They haven't won a Stanley Cup since 1967.

Speaker 1 But it's actually way worse than that because the way they lose playoff series are so stupendously, stupefyingly bad that it's like it's incomprehensible.

Speaker 1 So they had 11 years, so it's 17 years since they won a playoff series.

Speaker 1 The first 11 years, they just didn't make the playoffs except for once.

Speaker 1 And that one time they made the playoffs was 2013 when they gave up a 4-1 lead in the third period with 10 minutes left in game seven, including two goals

Speaker 1 when the Bruins pulled their goalie in under two minutes to go. That's insane.
Then in 2017, they were up 2-1 in a series against the Capitals. They lost in six games.
2018, they lost in seven games.

Speaker 1 2019, they lost in seven games. And then tonight, they lost up 3-1 against a team that I think Leaf fans, like, they hate more than any other team in the Canadiens.
They were up 3-1 in the series.

Speaker 1 They go to game 7. And there's actually nothing worse than a no-show in game 7.
Like, losing in game 7, I know that that's bad in 2013 when they lost the way they lost.

Speaker 1 I would contend that a no-show, the way they lost tonight, where you like get a fucking goal with... 30 seconds left to just have something on the score sheet,

Speaker 4 that hurts so much worse and it's not like the Leafs have been a terrible team this whole time either because they've been good like the Leafs in the late 90s early 2000s had a lot of really good players and they were so fun to watch that was like the Ty Domey team when he would just like beat people up that fell into the penalty box he would fight everybody on the on the ice uh you had i think darcy tucker was on that team you had matt sundine like they've had a lot of really good players come through toronto and you always think of them as being one of the premier franchises just because they've got like they're toronto's team It's just the iconic.

Speaker 4 The blue sweater is wonderful. But they are, and they actually kind of got screwed by the strike because they had a really good team.

Speaker 4 I think that's when they won their last playoff series, was the year before the strike. They had a good team that they were building on.

Speaker 4 They got fucked by the strike, and then they just haven't done anything at all since then. It's tough.
And our good friend Paul Mistinette

Speaker 4 said that when they were up 3-1 in this series,

Speaker 4 he would get himself circumcised.

Speaker 1 Yeah, he's uncircumcised.

Speaker 4 His dick got sweated, and he will circumcise himself or pay for somebody to circumcise him if they were to lose that series. Turns out they lost the series.

Speaker 4 Hot seat, Paul Dissmanet's foreskin.

Speaker 1 Circumcised. Yeah.
He's got to get circumcised.

Speaker 4 And I looked it up, actually.

Speaker 4 You have to wait 42 days before having sex after you get circumcised.

Speaker 1 Yikes.

Speaker 1 Yikes. And then new nickname, Jizz Nasty.

Speaker 4 Ooh.

Speaker 1 But you can't jizz if you're uncircumcised? No, you don't come. Oh.

Speaker 4 Yeah, if you, the foreskin just bottles it in.

Speaker 4 Yeah, yeah, just yeah, it goes back into your balls.

Speaker 1 All right, so we got big mad tweets. I'm going to read some of the best.
These are from Leaf fans. We asked them to write in.
We do feel bad for them, but misery is the best content.

Speaker 1 So this one's from Luca. He said, I want to cut my face off while getting punched in the groin multiple times.

Speaker 1 There was a theme, too, that people were trying to relate it to our own misery.

Speaker 1 I didn't need that, but a couple of them were like, uh, Ben Smith said, It's like being a Packers fan, but our offense turns into the Bears come playoff time.

Speaker 4 Yeah, that's actually a pretty good take, though. Yeah, that makes sense.

Speaker 1 Uh, Mikey said, Please don't talk about us on the show. I just threw up it's so bad.
I'm gonna chain smoke darts, and I hate SIGs. Everything's a fucking joke.

Speaker 1 It's like watching a movie where you know the ending and it sucks, but you watch it every year. Fuck, fuck, fuck.

Speaker 4 This is actually a pretty good spin zone by the Leafs. So the Leafs texted a statement to their fans

Speaker 4 after the game saying, Leafs Nation, this isn't where we want to say goodbye. In our five-month unprecedented journey, the vision was clear.
We fell short.

Speaker 4 But we would like to thank the 550 healthcare workers who represent the true heroes of today.

Speaker 4 And we can't wait to see Scotiabank Arena back there.

Speaker 1 Did J.J.

Speaker 4 Watt write that?

Speaker 1 Yeah, so this, yeah,

Speaker 4 they had a bunch of like

Speaker 4 what are they, like first responders, nurses, paramedics come out, and they were in attendance tonight. Saw another choking fan.
Yeah.

Speaker 2 One of their spin zone is that because there's still like a lot of COVID restrictions in Canada, they didn't have the giant watch party in the center of town.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 2 There's no video of all the Leafs fans getting their heart broken.

Speaker 1 Yeah. That's good.
Good point.

Speaker 1 Liam wrote, as Leafs fans, we should collectively choose one shit coin to pump and pool our earnings to buy the team. We fire everybody and hire a shaman as a coach.

Speaker 1 No need for hockey knowledge to coach the Leafs, just enough good juju to balance out the curse.

Speaker 4 I don't know how to say this guy's name.

Speaker 1 I'd rather drag my balls through a mile of broken glass and vinegar than watch this team cock up the playoffs again. I like that.
Cock up the playoffs.

Speaker 1 It's like taking 100 kicks to the dick over and over and over again.

Speaker 1 This guy did the same thing where Lucy decided to bring the Bears into this. I don't know why.

Speaker 1 It's like if the Bears got a top 10 quarterback and won the division was a top five team in the league with a real chance to win the Super Bowl, but then the double doink happens, but then you take that feeling and make it every year, except this year it was against against the Packers.

Speaker 4 Yikes. This one came from Kyle Lowry's season.
He said, it's like losing table tennis matches to the same guy over and over again after they've said they're the best in the office. That's tough.

Speaker 1 This guy, Tyler Rubin, shout out this guy. I'm a Leafs and Bengals fan.

Speaker 1 In the last 15 years, they've had 15 chances to move on to the next round. They've lost all 15.

Speaker 4 That's insane. That's on you for electing to become a Bengals.

Speaker 4 I hope that you live in Cincinnati and that you adopted the Maple Leafs and not the other way around because adopting the Bengals as your NFL team, I guess the jerseys are kind of cool, so I can see that.

Speaker 4 But like that,

Speaker 4 you can pull the escape hatch on that.

Speaker 4 You can abandon the Cincinnati Bengals franchise

Speaker 4 and nobody would blink twice. Except now, no, actually, no, they got Joe Burrow.
Yeah, all systems, Joe.

Speaker 1 All right, so I have a couple last ones. I like these ones.
Someone just succinctly said, Nicholas said, I wish I had got COVID and died so I didn't have to watch that. That just plays there.

Speaker 1 Mark says,

Speaker 1 We're a disgrace to the sport of hockey. I'll never be able to watch this team the same.
This was humiliating. I'm a loser.
My parents are losers. My dog is so dumb because we all support the leaves.

Speaker 1 No questions at this time. I just like being like, yeah, my dog's an idiot, too.

Speaker 4 I like this one because it really paints a picture. We've all been there.
Chain smoking cigarettes on my deck alone.

Speaker 4 Sick of being embarrassed and let down year after year, wondering if it'll ever change.

Speaker 1 Because you've been like just hanging out on your porch yeah smoking refreshing twitter yes hoping that something will change that's i think we've all been in that position that i always go back to like the the moment the day after a really bad loss it's that next morning that's the killer when you wake up and you have that one moment where you just like soak it all in and you're like god damn it i wish i could turn back time and that's just all toronto tomorrow the last one i have was jaqueesey jacobs said i've been a leaf fan for 47 years i'm clinically obese and i live with 17 possums that I found in the sewer on my street, go Seattle.

Speaker 1 I like that. I just like that.
Because I actually kind of believe him.

Speaker 1 In a weird way, I think that guy is living with possums and just hating his life because he's a Leaf fan, not because he's living with 17 possums.

Speaker 4 No, 17, at least he got friends.

Speaker 1 Yeah. And then the Canadiens add just such a terrible element for them.
I think that's...

Speaker 4 Would you rather lose to the Flyers or the Canadiens if you're the Maple Leafs?

Speaker 1 I think the Flyers. I think the Canadiens makes it so much worse.
So, so much worse. Because those are like the two hockey cities you think of when you think of Canada hockey cities.

Speaker 4 What other franchise would you compare the Maple Leafs to, like, in another sport? Because I don't think that... I was going through

Speaker 1 the Cubs.

Speaker 1 No, the Idol Cubs weren't like good. They were the lovable losers.
I mean, they got close a few times. The Cowboys.
I was going to say, the Cowboys in another 20 years would be the lease.

Speaker 1 They have to go another 20 years of just never doing anything, never getting back to a Super Bowl.

Speaker 4 But the crazy thing is, it would actually take like 30 more years. Yeah, no, but of the Cowboys not winning anything.

Speaker 1 But that would be

Speaker 1 the best analogy.

Speaker 4 Oh, they don't exist in the world.

Speaker 2 Whatever the R-words, whatever the fuck. Yeah, the football titanium.
No logos. The football title.

Speaker 1 But the Cowboys, I think, have the element of...

Speaker 4 We're reigning championships.

Speaker 1 Like the Seabees. They're one of the teams that you think of when you think of football.
Like, the Felice are one of the teams you think of when you think of hockey.

Speaker 1 They have historical relevance, but it's all in the past. And so,

Speaker 1 yeah, the Cowboys would be the team. If the Cowboys,

Speaker 1 sitting here 2045 and the Cowboys haven't gone back to a Super Bowl, they would be the Maple Leafs.

Speaker 4 So I'll put it into this type of perspective. It would be like the New England Patriots, if they didn't win a playoff game until like 2075.

Speaker 1 Well, no, the Leafs won some playoff games in there, but they haven't won one in Super Series.

Speaker 4 But I'm talking about series, yeah. Okay, let's maybe the New England Patriots won like two playoff series, and the year is 2075.
Yeah.

Speaker 4 At that point, they would become the football equivalent of the Maple Leafs.

Speaker 1 The Pirates. Brutal.
Could you imagine thinking like a guy? Like, if you're 20 years old in 1967 and you're like, this is fucking sick. Yeah.
We're so awesome.

Speaker 4 You think they had like that kid that brings the signs to every parade in Boston? They won. He had one of those in Toronto.
He's like, my life is fucking set.

Speaker 1 Yeah, they won a million Stanley Cups in like before the 50s, but they won a Stanley Cup in 62, 63, 64, and 67. And then after that, you're like, yeah, we're the fucking shit.

Speaker 1 We're always going to be the Leafs. And they just have been so, so, so bad ever since.
Have they been back to the Stanley Cup?

Speaker 1 I don't think so. I don't think they've been back to the Stanley Cup.

Speaker 4 It's also just, they're really creative with the ways that they lose these series, too.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I mean, losing in seven games every time is you got to really tip your hat to them.

Speaker 2 The Bruins won a few years ago when they blew the

Speaker 1 3-1 Leafs. 4-1.
4-1 and 3.

Speaker 4 Yeah, it's insane. Sorry.

Speaker 1 So,

Speaker 1 other hockey, the Bruins and Islanders played.

Speaker 1 That might have been the best playoff hockey game of these playoffs because that was like wall-to-wall intense.

Speaker 1 The best part, and I know it's cliche because everyone says, oh, playoff hockey is incredible.

Speaker 1 When you get to overtime and you go like an extended period of time, 10 minutes without a whistle or a stop, that is the best. It's incredible.

Speaker 4 Referees just swallow their whistles.

Speaker 1 Up and down and up and down.

Speaker 4 You have to try to murder somebody in overtime to get a penalty call or if it they they'll have to call the obvious delay of game if you just hit the puck like over the over the glass but besides that they will not call a penalty in overtime and you know the guys are just exhausted out there i was shocked that um i don't i feel like we haven't gotten a good marchand shorthanded goal recently have we nobody's been doing great in the playoffs He hasn't licked anybody.

Speaker 2 Yeah, but he's had a lot of goals, had an overtime goal. I would like to see their first line is buzzing.

Speaker 4 Why Why isn't he licking people anymore?

Speaker 1 I don't know. He's too focused on

Speaker 1 winning. Louis Farrell is.
Remember him? He's not biting people. Yeah, I don't like getting heard from him since.

Speaker 1 The Avs are just awesome.

Speaker 1 I feel like they're going to

Speaker 1 win it all. The South.
They're going to go all the way.

Speaker 2 Nathan McKinnon looks like

Speaker 2 when you take a player in NHL and just boost all their ratings to 99, that's kind of how he looks like when he plays.

Speaker 2 He's just so much bigger and just goes so much faster than it is.

Speaker 1 You're cheating. The sliders, Slider Dorks are mad about Nathan McKinnon.

Speaker 4 It's embarrassing to lose seven to one in the playoffs. In the second round of the playoffs.

Speaker 1 That's so hard to do, I feel like. You just like

Speaker 1 incredible.

Speaker 1 And yeah, so we'll probably have Whitney on, I think maybe on Sunday for next Monday, talk some more hockey. But they have been great.
The playoffs have been great.

Speaker 1 The Islanders-Bruins series is going to tear Barstool apart. Stu Feiner, our good friend, who

Speaker 1 I think I've decided, I think we do need to get Stu back on the pod this summer. Yes.
I think there's enough. We need to go have a day at Stu's house.
We're going to do Wiffleball.

Speaker 1 Yeah, we're going to have a Whiffleball Island. We're going to have a Whiffleball tournament.

Speaker 1 Just another. Jake, how are you at Wiffleball?

Speaker 1 I think I'm decent. I don't know.
I've been playing a while. Hank is going to be so, so exciting.

Speaker 4 Hank is going to beat Hank really good. Oh, yeah.
He won't be able to do this.

Speaker 1 He won the 27th championships.

Speaker 1 With your team? Yeah. It was an individual award.

Speaker 1 It was a three-man team.

Speaker 2 Shook Knights.

Speaker 1 Awesome.

Speaker 1 Actually, maybe Jake and Hank will be on the same team for our Wiffle Ball tournament. Sure.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Okay.
Great. That would be awesome.

Speaker 1 Jake, do you want to talk about your viral video now?

Speaker 6 Or do you want to wait? Whatever you guys want.

Speaker 4 It's your show.

Speaker 4 Thank you for the permission to talk about it whenever we want.

Speaker 1 Let's talk about it now. All right, let's talk about it now.

Speaker 4 So Jake went viral on Friday because it turns out he is in the video that we've all seen making its way around the internet.

Speaker 4 You are the face of mansplaining, where you were leaning over talking to a girl in a bar. She's

Speaker 4 very much rolling her eyes at the conversation.

Speaker 4 Disgusted. Disgusted with whatever it is that this young gentleman is.

Speaker 2 Hanging on to every word, but just gets more and more disappointed as the words continue to come.

Speaker 1 And he's wearing a suit in a bar.

Speaker 4 And he looks a lot like our darling Jake. And this young lady went to Syracuse and she said, I'm sorry, Jake, when she tweeted out the video.

Speaker 1 What?

Speaker 4 Could that have been you?

Speaker 6 I'm here. I'm a facts-first person.

Speaker 6 Facts are it's not me. We have proof from the source itself, it's not me, but you guys can think whatever you want.

Speaker 1 The memes were great.

Speaker 6 You guys blew up my phone on vacation.

Speaker 1 Yeah, Jake was on a boat with his friends.

Speaker 2 That's fucked up, guys.

Speaker 1 And well, you vacation shamed on Thursday, so absolutely. We'll never forget that.
Absolutely. How many missed text messages did you have?

Speaker 6 So I put my phone away. We were on a boat from 9 to 1.
I put it away. And in 30 minutes, 72 texts from you guys.
One of my friends said, Jake, you should probably check your phone.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 6 And I told you guys earlier that morning, I'm not going to have my phone.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Yeah.

Speaker 4 It was has Justine landed, but for Jake, right? We're all waiting for you to get back. We thought that you were coming up with your story, like getting your story together.
Nope.

Speaker 4 Which I know that you did contact the young lady.

Speaker 4 I don't know if you had deleted any of those DMs. If maybe you were pressuring her to say that it wasn't you.

Speaker 1 No. So it was another Jake who went to Syracuse who looked like you and also wears suits at bars.

Speaker 2 And has been nowhere to be found.

Speaker 1 Correct. But

Speaker 1 we got to find. This is like when OJ was trying to find the killer.

Speaker 6 The other Jake I wasn't really a suit at a bar person I think I did it like once

Speaker 1 I Think

Speaker 4 I think you've probably shown up to bars wearing suits because you're coming from another suit event right, yeah, right, like maybe you were calling a game memes were great

Speaker 1 if you haven't seen it

Speaker 1 Hank will retweet a bunch of them tomorrow morning for you just to make sure it was not me, but Hank was very

Speaker 1 where were you that night? I don't know what the night was. What bar was it? I couldn't tell.
Honestly, that was smart of you to answer it that way.

Speaker 4 If you were to put a percentage on it that it is not you, what would that be? 100%. It can't be 100%, Jake, because

Speaker 4 you're not sure about it.

Speaker 1 You don't know where you were. You don't know where that bar is.

Speaker 2 We don't know who this person is.

Speaker 1 Have you ever... Jake, okay, cross-examination.

Speaker 4 Jake, have you ever consumed more than six beers or alcoholic drinks in an hour?

Speaker 1 No.

Speaker 4 Pussy.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 All right.

Speaker 1 All right.

Speaker 4 But have you ever been intoxicated in a bar?

Speaker 1 Yes.

Speaker 2 Have you ever talked to a girl at a bar?

Speaker 4 Yes. So is there at all a possibility that at some point in your life, you would have talked to a girl in a bar while you were intoxicated?

Speaker 1 Yes. Okay.

Speaker 6 However, if it was a t-shirt, I was telling you guys this earlier, I would have been like... Trying to convince myself, maybe it is me.

Speaker 6 But the suit factor, I know for a fact, there was one time I wore a suit in four years at a bar at college. It was a t-shirt.

Speaker 1 Maybe it could have been me. It was a time maybe I really got drunk.

Speaker 6 But the suit factor really made me sure it was not me.

Speaker 4 What about the fact that she said that it was Jake?

Speaker 6 Okay, Syracuse is a big school.

Speaker 1 Jake's a popular name. How many Jake? Short haircut.

Speaker 1 The haircut was crazy.

Speaker 4 Crazy. Crazy.
It was wild. Wild.

Speaker 1 Crazy. Wild.
Yeah. Looked exactly like you.
Exactly. All right, well, we'll get to the bottom of it.
We appreciate you being a good. No, no, We'll get to the bottom of it.

Speaker 1 If we have to have her on the show, we'll have her on the show. Okay.

Speaker 1 This poor kid, though, you don't want it in the gutter. Jake?

Speaker 1 She's already with Jake now? You got it. We wouldn't want Jake to get excited about it.
I guess he had 4 million views.

Speaker 4 No matter what, I guess he's.

Speaker 1 I was so fucked up that she was like, I'll never reveal what was said. Sorry, Jake.

Speaker 1 You kind of just blew that one wide open.

Speaker 1 Our

Speaker 1 placeholder.

Speaker 1 I don't know. Maybe you're not going to be a nice person.

Speaker 2 Maybe it's a couple of alums and cahoots.

Speaker 1 Oh, interesting. Oh.

Speaker 1 All right. Well, we'll get to the bottom of it.
You know what we should do?

Speaker 4 We should have Jake reenact that video with somebody here in the office and just see how it matches up, how the angles match up.

Speaker 1 I have a feeling that Billy's spending a lot of time on this video.

Speaker 4 He already told me he was analyzing the angle of your ears. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Okay.

Speaker 1 We'll find out. We found out.
Yeah, we're doing it. No, we will find out.

Speaker 1 We will find out. We will find out.

Speaker 1 All right, let's get to Who's Back of the Week. We're going to do Who's Back of the Week and Hot Seat Cool Throne because we're combining

Speaker 1 Monday and Wednesday show.

Speaker 1 Who's Back of the Week is brought to you by... Give it up for Chicago.

Speaker 8 Sebastian Maniscalco's new stand-up special, It Ain't Right, is coming to Hulu on November 21st.

Speaker 1 30 years ago, Jeff Bezos, complete nerd. Bezos now ripped to shreds on his super yacht and the boxes keep coming.

Speaker 8 Sebastian Maniscalco, It Ain't Right, premieres November 21st, streaming on Hulu and Hulu on Disney Plus for bundle subscribers.

Speaker 1 Terms apply.

Speaker 1 Okay, Hank, who's back of the week?

Speaker 2 My who's back of the week is Urban Meyer.

Speaker 1 Oh, yeah.

Speaker 2 Wrestling, so it was whatever, AE Wrestling, Chris Jericho. They're in Jacksonville in the, I guess, where Jaguars practice or whatever.

Speaker 2 And in the, I don't know, what do you call it?

Speaker 1 A bit of work.

Speaker 2 They run into. Oh, that was real.
They run into Urban Meyer's office.

Speaker 2 He and another coach are in there. Charlie Strong.
They They start throwing footballs at him. The wrestlers take a laptop, smash it over.
Now there's wrestlers on it, which looked like it hurt a lot.

Speaker 2 I still, I know it's like wrestling is fake, but I don't, I watch that video a lot of times. Like, that dude got absolutely smoked.

Speaker 1 Urban Meyer handed him the laptop. Yes.
To then get smashed over the forest. And then afterwards, they asked him about it, and he was like, I don't remember what you're talking about.

Speaker 1 Wait, did Urbaney had a brain aneurysm?

Speaker 4 Did he report the assault to the proper authorities?

Speaker 1 He did. Okay.
He said, I'm sorry that we were in this situation.

Speaker 4 He forwarded the report to all the appropriate authorities that he was obligated to do under law.

Speaker 1 I was thinking about it because I was like, why would Urban Meyer open himself up to the jokes that are going to get made from this? Which I made many of them.

Speaker 1 And then I remembered that Tony Khan, Shad Khan's son, he owns that wrestling league. So he kind of, Urban Meyer might have to be in every wrestling promo going forward.
It was a good one.

Speaker 1 Yeah, it was.

Speaker 4 Tony's the director of analytics now for the Jaguars. You know, it would have very funny if Cam Newton had just shown up, taken the laptop, and then run out the door with it.

Speaker 1 Yeah,

Speaker 1 that would have been a quick and a nod. Yes.
And Urban would have been like, oh, you can't be on the team anymore.

Speaker 2 I'm also just a huge fan of the narrative that he brought in Tebow just to take off heat off Trevor Lawrence.

Speaker 1 You like that narrative? I actually kind of like that narrative, too. It's a good one.
Because

Speaker 1 it works. Right.

Speaker 4 But what's also going to happen is Tebow is just going to be too much of a natural leader and take all the heat,

Speaker 4 including from the players, off off Trevor Lawrence.

Speaker 4 It's a classic Marcus Smart. Do you want him on your team? Yeah.

Speaker 4 Do you want a guy who's such a natural leader like Tim Tebow on your team if you're trying to groom a younger guy to take that spot?

Speaker 1 I just love every time they show Tim Tebow like flexing while trying to catch a football and they're like, look at how Jack Tebow is.

Speaker 1 Tebow has muscles that aren't conducive to playing football anymore. No, no.

Speaker 1 I don't know if he can move other than in a robotic fashion at this point.

Speaker 4 No, he's just been getting swole for the last like three years.

Speaker 1 Right, right.

Speaker 1 Like, baseball has been a hobby for him.

Speaker 4 He's just been in the gym.

Speaker 2 I've always loved the old swinging, like, uh,

Speaker 2 leg press video from back in the day. Like, that looked like the worst exercise you could ever do for your legs.

Speaker 4 Yes. Well, Tim Tebow's mindset is, like, there's not a problem in the world that can't be solved with a hard workout.
Yes. Working harder than the other guy.
There was that story.

Speaker 4 Did you see the story about Tim Tebow at summer camp? No.

Speaker 4 When he was like, I don't know, 12 years old, they had a 55-pound barbell that the guys were doing curls on, and it was a contest to see who could do the most curls with this barbell.

Speaker 4 And I think the guy that was in first was like, I don't know, 40 or 50 reps.

Speaker 4 And then Tebow got up there and did like 300 reps, and then he couldn't move his arms for three days afterwards, which is like the perfect Tim Tebow story. So perfect.

Speaker 4 I will work out so hard and ruin my body so hard that you're going to have no choice but to respect me for it, even if it makes me functionally unathletic.

Speaker 1 Yeah, you could have stopped at 70. Yeah.
Instead, you went to 300.

Speaker 1 All right, is that it?

Speaker 2 My other who's back is Jake Paul. Okay.
Oh, yeah. He's fighting 39-year-old Tyrone Woodley, former UFC fighter.

Speaker 1 Ooh.

Speaker 2 But Jake Paul came out as the early favorite, too.

Speaker 1 He's doing it so fucking masterfully where he just keeps on upping it a little bit, but it's also guys that he can beat.

Speaker 2 Right. Like this guy's lost his last three fights, but I've already seen videos of fights he won and knocked guys out where it's like, oh, this guy looks fucking sick.
Right.

Speaker 2 But that was when he was in his prime. He's 39 now.

Speaker 1 All right.

Speaker 2 Is that it? I have more, but I'm saving them for Hot See Cool.

Speaker 1 Hot See Cool. Yeah, nice.
That's smart. That's smart.

Speaker 4 My Who's Back of the Week is gaming the system via quote tweets and making things that you want to trend trend online. Ooh.

Speaker 4 So you've seen like so many of these in the last two or three weeks where it's like, what? RP Tim Allen. Who's the person that you think of when you see this logo? Like you saw with Mugsy Bogs.

Speaker 4 Now every brand is doing it with their logo. And it's just the easiest way in the world to make some, like, one specific thing trend that you want to.
I love that.

Speaker 4 We should do that with Jake, where it's like,

Speaker 4 who's the first person you think of when you see this picture?

Speaker 1 And it's the guy talking to the girl

Speaker 4 at the bar. But it's really easy.
Like every single sports media organization, if you haven't gotten on board this train yet, like what are you even paying your social media team to do?

Speaker 1 Yeah, it's true. Just figure it out.
And it's not even, they're just throwing up like JPEGs of the old logo, like, job well done. Mm-hmm.
Yeah. Done.
for the day.

Speaker 1 All right, my who's back is vanilla ice. Did you guys see his Memorial Day post? It was beautiful.

Speaker 1 He said, happy Memorial day happy because we have the freedom to have a backyard cookout sports and sharing smiles thanks to the soldiers hashtag happy memorial day and then it was a picture of uh michelangelo no

Speaker 1 leonardo what weapons that was close

Speaker 4 he's blue leonardo with pablo what color is is raphael

Speaker 1 with a uh american flag draped over his shoulder looking like a badass i love it and i vanilla ice i don't know how often he tweets i don't follow him. I'm going to start following him actually.

Speaker 1 That's how you do it. Like, that's just, just show up.

Speaker 1 If you're a celebrity who, you know, was a was hot for 15 minutes and you haven't been heard from for 20 years, show up every now and then. Frankie Munes does it well.

Speaker 1 Like, show up every now and then with a hilarious tweet and people be like, damn, that was awesome.

Speaker 4 I just like anytime you can incorporate like an old animation into whatever new movement is going on that day. You see that happen a lot with like, there's usually like some jacked up Garfield.
Yes.

Speaker 4 Like people have started to to sexualize Garfield online. But yeah, any throwback to the Ninja Turtles is a winner in my book.
Yes.

Speaker 1 Jake, do you have a Who's Back of the Week?

Speaker 1 I do.

Speaker 6 It is full planes. There weren't many positives over the last 18 months.

Speaker 4 Yes.

Speaker 6 One of them was the middle seat being open. That is no longer the case.
I feel like you're back into work for the Twitter.

Speaker 1 If people can play it. Yeah,

Speaker 1 I've been playing a lot. Dick Vital.
Shout out, Dick.

Speaker 4 Wait, are you saying it's a good thing that the middle seats are filled?

Speaker 6 No, I'm just saying it's back.

Speaker 1 I said it was a good thing when you were back. Yeah, it was a very good thing.
Agreed. I thought you're who's back was going to be talking to girls at bars.

Speaker 4 But that's also back, wouldn't you agree?

Speaker 1 Yeah, of course.

Speaker 6 Plenty of opportunities

Speaker 6 for the fellow Jakes out there, maybe who go to Syracuse. I guess it's the summer now, but when the fall kicks back in.

Speaker 1 That's what you need to do, Jake. You need to do like

Speaker 1 Eminem when he had that. What was that music video where it was all the M ⁇ M?

Speaker 4 Real Slim Shady.

Speaker 1 Yeah. You need to just get all the Jakes you can find and pack a bar with them.

Speaker 6 Well, Jake's at Syracuse this fall. Send us your videos.

Speaker 1 Talking to girls at the bar. Yeah, you just got to muddy DJs.
Yeah, you got to

Speaker 1 muddy the water.

Speaker 4 Does Syracuse have a Jake problem?

Speaker 1 Maybe

Speaker 1 possibly.

Speaker 4 So, yeah, full planes are back, but I'm telling you, you're not going to be able to drink on a plane.

Speaker 4 If things keep going the same way that they've been going, you see the exact same thing happening on planes that you see at NBA playoff games.

Speaker 4 People have forgotten how to handle themselves on a plane. Like Like a flight attendant, she got her teeth knocked out the other day in that video.

Speaker 4 Yeah, so that's what I'm saying. Like, you can't buy hard liquor on a plane anymore.
Southwest said, you guys lost all your drinking privileges. You can't handle it.

Speaker 4 We're taking away the booze in the air. Figure it out, guys.
Damn.

Speaker 1 All right.

Speaker 1 Let's do Hot C, Cool Throne, shall we? Hot C, Cool Throne, brought to you by our friends at.

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Speaker 4 Hot seat cool thrown Hank.

Speaker 2 My hot seat is you, Big Cat. I've been seeing a lot of videos of giant animals.
There was the video of

Speaker 2 the elephant with a huge dick, which I would punch. There was the jacked kangaroo video.

Speaker 1 Again, not worried. Did you see him? He was spazzing.
He was such a spazz.

Speaker 4 He was muscle-backed. He was the Tim Tebow of animals.
Dude, he could not throw a punch. He's punch him in the nose.
So, what? He's vascular. Big deal.
Did you see the giant moose?

Speaker 2 That's kind of an old one, but I saw that recirculating.

Speaker 1 It does feel like people are trying to prove that I can't beat these animals. But again, show me an animal.
I'll find its windpipe. I'll snap it in half.

Speaker 2 I mean, the kangaroos.

Speaker 1 Dude, the kangaroo is... The only thing that scared me was the elephant.
Because you could punch that elephant in the dick and he might like it. You know what I mean? So

Speaker 1 that one, I'll give 50-50. The kangaroo was a bitch.
He was a spazz. He was just losing his mind.

Speaker 1 I put that thing in a fucking headlock, and he's not going anywhere.

Speaker 2 Interesting. All right.
And then my cool throw is lacrosse. Yeah.
Sport of the future national championship today. Awesome.
I was driving, so I didn't get to catch it.

Speaker 1 I watched, but I heard it was must-watch.

Speaker 1 Minus the 20-minute national championship.

Speaker 2 Virginia, back-to-back champs.

Speaker 4 Oh, wow. Dynasty.
Dynasty, yeah.

Speaker 1 And Maryland had a chance to tie the game with like 10 seconds left.

Speaker 1 They won a face-off off of it. They scored a goal to go down by one.
They won the face-off. The guy ran down.
He didn't go low to high. You got to go low to high till you die.

Speaker 4 You got to go top cheddar. Yeah.

Speaker 1 So it was an awesome game, though. I feel like this happens every Memorial Day.

Speaker 1 We just need more Memorial Days. That's the only way that lacrosse can take off because every Memorial Day I'm like damn lacrosse is awesome.
And then I forget about it until the next Memorial Day.

Speaker 4 We love lacrosse though. It is the sport of the future.
And the PLL is starting up. Water dogs.
Water dogs.

Speaker 1 We'll get Paul Rabel back on.

Speaker 1 That's it. That's it.
Well,

Speaker 2 I had Jay Cutler on there too, but I didn't know.

Speaker 2 I was unsure.

Speaker 4 Vaccines?

Speaker 2 He's asking for half of Kristen Cavallari's Uncommon James brand and the divorce. Love it.

Speaker 1 We're going to get Jay back on the show and we'll help him

Speaker 4 get that going. Divorced.
Yeah.

Speaker 2 But yeah, I thought that was kind of a power move. You usually hear it coming from the other side.

Speaker 1 It's called negotiating. Yeah.
Yeah.

Speaker 4 Listen, it just tells me that he made a good decision when he married. He married a successful woman.

Speaker 1 Art of the deal. You got to anchor the negotiation and then you work back from it.
And then you end up

Speaker 1 a quarter of Uncommon James. Boom.

Speaker 4 My hot seat is everyone that will never be born. There was an article in Bloomberg today saying, Spare a thought for the billions of people who will never exist.

Speaker 4 And the article was just about how population growth is slowing, and so therefore we're going to miss out on a bunch of people who will never be born because population isn't growing anymore. Damn.

Speaker 4 So that's tough. So thoughts, but Spin Zone, is there that's one less potential Kony or Hitler out there that's ever going to be born? It is sad, though.

Speaker 1 You got to take the good with the bad.

Speaker 4 Like every second that you're not fucking, you're murdering millions of people over the next thousand years.

Speaker 1 I'm doing my part.

Speaker 4 Unfortunately, I'm not.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 4 But yeah, I thought that was a great premise of an article. I do like that.
That's just, that's a classic case of

Speaker 4 you got really high and had a thought. Yeah.
And you're like, this is going to go.

Speaker 1 Or you had to write something. You had a deadline.

Speaker 4 So here you go. What about everyone who's not going to be born? My cool throne is Germany because the NFL is going to try to play games in Germany.
It's the fastest growing market.

Speaker 4 out there, so I don't know if it's going to be, if they're going to play like the Mexico game in Germany or the England game that's supposed to be in Mexico in Germany. But the bottom line is in 2022,

Speaker 4 I think the NFL is going to have like an early morning game in Germany to grow that brand.

Speaker 4 Okay, I don't know how I feel about it because like I feel like I've just gotten the vibe of what the British field looks like. Like, I can spot British grass now on TV.

Speaker 4 I don't know what the German soccer field is.

Speaker 1 Like, is it too long? It's too long.

Speaker 4 Yeah, so Germany.

Speaker 1 And it's wet. It's always wet.

Speaker 1 Their grass is always wet. Yeah, yeah, in England.

Speaker 4 It's super wet. Super wet.
Because they play at like Wimbley Field and they don't know how to water it like an NFL team. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Or it just rains a lot. But yeah, it's always wet.
All right, my hot seat is narcissists.

Speaker 1 So I'm going to read something for you guys. You tell me who wrote this.
Okay.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 1 For those of you who have had exposure to one talking about narcissists, this will take all of of your seemingly confusing and emotionally draining experiences and create a huge aha moment.

Speaker 1 And for those of you who haven't, you will want to know what to look for. Narcissistic abuse is no joke and one of the most difficult emotional experiences to regain your confidence and clarity from.

Speaker 1 But I always say what doesn't kill you makes you stronger and smarter. Who wrote that?

Speaker 1 LeBron.

Speaker 2 Cam Newton.

Speaker 1 Mm-mm.

Speaker 1 That was written.

Speaker 2 Johnny Bananas.

Speaker 1 By one. Confucius.
Wait.

Speaker 1 Danica Patrick. Oh, interesting.

Speaker 1 Interesting.

Speaker 4 Who's she talking about?

Speaker 1 I don't know, BFT. I have no idea.
But she did an interview

Speaker 1 with a doctor in the field of narcissism talking about her past experiences dating someone who had narcissistic abuse. Hmm.

Speaker 1 Counterpoint. Who does she dated? If you were

Speaker 4 alleged quarterback of the Green Bay Packers, would you not feel that your narcissism was at least a little bit justified?

Speaker 1 So he's allowed to be a narcissist.

Speaker 4 That's a fine line because if you are,

Speaker 4 let's say you are the greatest athlete to ever walk the face of the earth, wouldn't it be unhealthy to not think of yourself in the highest terms possible?

Speaker 1 Campaign

Speaker 1 as far as I know is a really good teammate. Okay.
So I don't know what you're talking about. Yeah, I just thought that was an interesting quote.
That's all.

Speaker 1 I also want to do something, and I'm going to do this every week until it comes true. I'm going to predict that this is the week that Aaron Rodgers gets traded.
Okay.

Speaker 1 So,

Speaker 1 and if it doesn't happen this week, I will do it next week. And give me credit when that happens.

Speaker 4 Have we gotten an update on, is he still in Hawaii right now with Miles Teller?

Speaker 1 Miles Teller got punched in the face. You see that?

Speaker 4 Probably by Aaron Rodgers.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 4 Did it spend too much time.

Speaker 1 They bound to bound to break up um

Speaker 1 that was a crazy story some guy like came up to him was like you owe me money from my wedding or from your wedding yeah and and fought him at a bar how about aaron rodgers top bun we haven't had a real conversation about that i think he's just living his best life i love it for him it's like when um when ryan from the office like came back from thailand and he like bleached his hair.

Speaker 4 Yep. Kind of changed.
That's like we're dealing with Hawaii Aaron Rodgers right now.

Speaker 1 Yes.

Speaker 4 Aloha, Aaron.

Speaker 1 Yes.

Speaker 1 All right, my cool throne is America because

Speaker 1 Pulsich won a Champions League.

Speaker 4 Yeah, congratulations.

Speaker 1 From America. That's our first step.
It's never been done. An American has never won a Champions League.
We won it all by ourselves. Next stop World Cup.

Speaker 4 Well, next stop qualifying for the World Cup.

Speaker 1 I'm skipping past that.

Speaker 4 I have a feeling that

Speaker 4 all these building blocks that we've got in place, at some point in the next 10 years, the U.S. men's national team is going to qualify for a World Cup.

Speaker 1 There we go.

Speaker 4 I'm feeling it. I like that.

Speaker 1 And if they don't, it's hilarious.

Speaker 4 And so either way, weren't we going to have somebody? Wasn't like, was Dest on Man City? Am I making that up?

Speaker 1 He was on it up.

Speaker 4 Oh, he was on like Real Madrid or something like that.

Speaker 4 One of those other Super League players.

Speaker 1 But we want it all.

Speaker 1 And you have to just admit that. If you're a fan of European soccer, you got to admit that America has taken over.

Speaker 4 The best player in the world.

Speaker 4 I would say that

Speaker 4 if you win UEFA Champions League, that's actually the best team in the world, right? Because you would think that the best club team could beat any national team. Yes.

Speaker 4 So the best player on the best club team is American. Therefore, the USA is the best soccer country in the entire world.

Speaker 1 Yes. Did you see that guy? Ah, fuck, what is his name?

Speaker 2 Did the Swans get bumped?

Speaker 1 Yeah, they did.

Speaker 1 I thought that was a good thing.

Speaker 1 No,

Speaker 1 bumped down. They stayed down.

Speaker 1 Who's the guy? Fuck. I gotta find his name.
He had won, like, he's basically the Robert Ory of soccer right now.

Speaker 1 He won,

Speaker 1 like, he was on the Leicester City team, then he was on Chelsea. He won a World Cup with France.
He won the Europa League last year. He won the Champions League this year, and he's a short king.

Speaker 1 He's 5'6.

Speaker 4 Who would that be?

Speaker 1 I don't know. I don't know.
Dude from France. Some little guy.
Yeah, some little guy. Napoleon.
Yes. That's exactly right.
Got it. That is exactly right.

Speaker 1 All right, let's do one quick talking tennis, and then we have a Monday reading to end the show.

Speaker 1 Naomi Osaka has withdrawn from the French Open because the media is a bunch of fucking jerks. My girl.

Speaker 1 No, but seriously, what the fuck? This was the weirdest story.

Speaker 4 So the way I read it was

Speaker 4 she said that she was uncomfortable doing the media stuff because she deals with

Speaker 4 anxiety. She deals with like social anxiety and depression.

Speaker 4 And yeah, all that stuff. And so she tried to communicate that.
The French Open people were like, we're not going to tolerate this.

Speaker 1 You have to do your requisite media interviews.

Speaker 4 And so then she's like, I'm just going to bow out them because they were going to make her. You're not allowed to compete in the French Open unless you deal with the media.

Speaker 1 The media should get suspended. They should.

Speaker 4 They should get suspended.

Speaker 2 You have one of the best players in the world not playing in one of the best tournaments

Speaker 2 because of the media.

Speaker 1 We stand with Naomi. And then we did two things this show.
We disavowed water bottle throwers and we stood with Naomi.

Speaker 4 And then the French tennis president issued a statement.

Speaker 1 I bet that guy's fucking cool.

Speaker 4 Yeah, then he declined to answer questions to the media afterwards, which is perfect.

Speaker 1 You know what?

Speaker 4 What's the biggest sponsor of the French Open?

Speaker 2 Is it Rolex? Rolex.

Speaker 4 I'm going to boycott Rolex.

Speaker 1 Yep, same. I'm not.
I will not buy Mike Cornellier.

Speaker 4 I was going to buy Hank a Rolex watch.

Speaker 1 And I was going to buy two.

Speaker 4 I was going to match it for the entire control room for Jake as well. I was going to buy them all Rolexes.

Speaker 4 But due to their ongoing sponsorship of the French Open, I can no longer, in good conscience, give my money to the business.

Speaker 1 Let's go down the list. What are the other ones, Jake? Hennessy? Hennessy? No.
None for you. Maybe.
Yeah, I'll boycott them. Is that Tropicana? Is Hennessy bottled by Coors Light?

Speaker 4 No,

Speaker 1 I don't think so. So then, boycott Hennessy.

Speaker 4 Done.

Speaker 1 BMW?

Speaker 4 Out. Tropicana, you said?

Speaker 1 Tropicana. I'm not ready to give up orange juice.

Speaker 4 No juice.

Speaker 1 No juice.

Speaker 1 That's where I draw the line. Perrier.
Yeah. Yeah, boycott, boycotted.

Speaker 1 What is that? Wilson. Lacoste.

Speaker 4 Lacoste, yep, boycotted.

Speaker 1 I will be buying the

Speaker 4 Emirates. Out.
Emmirits, yeah.

Speaker 1 I'm not going to fly to to the

Speaker 1 out.

Speaker 1 Wilson, out.

Speaker 2 MasterCard.

Speaker 1 Out. Magnum.

Speaker 1 Magnum condoms. Out.
Easy. That's an easy one.

Speaker 1 I will no longer be purchasing

Speaker 4 magnum condoms.

Speaker 1 What's the vasing? It's a drink. I hate it.

Speaker 4 Okay, this is really easy for me to boycott all these things. Yep.
Congratulations to us.

Speaker 1 Tennis. I'm going to boycott tennis

Speaker 1 in general. Anyone who plays Wimbledon?

Speaker 2 What about table tennis?

Speaker 1 Nope. I know that.
I love that sport. I love watching it.

Speaker 1 Probably back for Wimbledon.

Speaker 4 Possibly the wrongest person on the internet consistently is a guy named Rob Parker. If you don't know Rob Parker, you might remember him from such hits as, is Robert Griffin black enough?

Speaker 4 He used to be on ESPN, then he got fired, then he was at a bunch. He's probably been fired like nine times.

Speaker 4 He wrote a take on DEAD bleep bleepspin.com. He said, Naomi Osaka is wrong.
Her boycott of the media at the French Open is misguided and worse, it's downright unprofessional.

Speaker 4 If this tennis superstar is seriously dealing with a mental health issue, as she announced on social media, she should have bowed out gracefully from the event and taken time for herself.

Speaker 4 But to claim she can do everything else, but she can't talk to the media is bogus. Bravo to the four Grand Slam tournaments who issued Osaka both a fine and a stern warning for her behavior.

Speaker 4 He's just a big fan of the tournament spanning together.

Speaker 1 I love it. Why?

Speaker 4 Do we really need to have these interviews where a tennis player would be like, my opponent played really well and I'm just lucky to advance.

Speaker 1 Okay, I was thinking about it. Yes, I think that, well, I stand with Naomi.
I want to just throw that out there.

Speaker 1 Blanket.

Speaker 1 I've already boycotted all those places.

Speaker 1 Whenever someone says, do we need these interviews? I just think of Alan Iverson practice. Like, we would never have that.

Speaker 2 That one got taken out of context, though. Practice.

Speaker 1 Or what about...

Speaker 2 The thing is, that interview, he was talking about his best friend had just died.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 2 And he was putting it all in perspective. He's like, my best friends died, blah, blah, blah.
But we're talking about practice. Everyone took it out of context.

Speaker 1 What about

Speaker 1 John Cheney trying to choke John Calapari?

Speaker 4 Never would have had that. You should have, yeah.

Speaker 1 What about not a dime back, Jim Calhoun?

Speaker 1 Jim Calhoun actually should just step in for anyone who has social anxiety and do their like if this is the perfect solution you should have Naomi Osaka should just hire Jim Calhoun to do all of her interviews for him, and then we all win.

Speaker 1 Because then we have Jim Calhoun giving press conferences and being mad at a bunch of French people. Riley Curry.
Riley Curry. Boom.

Speaker 4 I do think that you should be able to nominate a champion that steps in and handles the media for you. That should be allowed.
Yeah. That'll be like your official spokesperson.

Speaker 4 Have Marshawn Lynch go out there and just be like, I'm just here so Naomi doesn't get fine.

Speaker 1 Yeah, what about LeBron? Like, if we didn't have LeBron, we wouldn't have had last year when he said that 35-year-old LeBron could beat 27-year-old LeBron LeBron.

Speaker 4 He would have never known about his pretty much broken wrist.

Speaker 1 Yeah, pretty much or the the the episode when he kind of carried his purse and walked away yeah with his little short shorts yeah yeah these are all things that we need um all right let's finish up hey what's going on there pal we saw you at the hockey game on do i know you guys i'm ryan whitney i got a drink named after me not a big deal pink whitney that's what i thought see you fellas i invented the thing you pigeon pink whitney for legendary moments All right, let's wrap up.

Speaker 1 We got a quick Monday reading. It might be fake.

Speaker 4 I just want to say before we get into this, a lot of people are always asking. It's 1229 right now in the morning.

Speaker 1 I'm struggling. Let me tell you.
1229. I am struggling.
I'm an exhausted person in general. I think I'm, unfortunately,

Speaker 1 I'm just an always-tired guy now. And

Speaker 1 people were shocked today because I was talking about how I was going to take an afternoon nap. Like, you couldn't take a nap with the amount of coffee you say you drink.
I could drink

Speaker 1 five cups of coffee and I'd fall asleep two seconds later if I have to, if I'm tired enough. enough.

Speaker 4 I did an all-time old-person move on Sunday night. I left the bar at like 11:30.

Speaker 1 Oh, it's the best.

Speaker 4 I left the bar at 11:30 because I wanted to go home and watch Mayor of East Town on demand before I fell asleep. It just and I still fell asleep during it, but it was leaving early.

Speaker 4 Leaving early so I can catch up on a program.

Speaker 1 It's the best. It's the best.

Speaker 4 That's where dad gets his pair of air monarchs.

Speaker 1 Yeah, it's the best. All right, here's the Monday reading.
Again, it might be fake, but it's good. So it is titled,

Speaker 1 My Husband Won't Take His Mask Off, Even for Sex.

Speaker 1 So here we go.

Speaker 4 I've been married to a great guy for five and a half years.

Speaker 1 He's handsome, sexy, funny, and kind. Wow.
Way to brag. It's true that he's always been a little prissy about illnesses, but I never thought it was a real problem.

Speaker 1 However, during the pandemic, his terror about getting sick has reached new levels. For the last year, he's refused to take off his face mask, even when we are at home, just the two of us.

Speaker 1 This is is true, even now that he is fully vaccinated for the virus. He wears it to sleep.
Come on, to do most of his bathroom activities, and yes, even during lovemaking.

Speaker 4 To eat,

Speaker 1 he pulls it up to expose his mouth and then quickly pulls it back down between bites.

Speaker 1 While he does not insist that I do the same, I can tell it bothers him that I do not, especially because I have now started going maskless outside per the CDC guidelines and plan on restaurant dining inside soon for a girls' night out.

Speaker 1 I actually think this guy might be real. Why?

Speaker 1 Because I think there are people that are like this.

Speaker 4 That continue to wear masks to sleep?

Speaker 1 That are like, they love rules so much. COVID has broken their brain where like it was,

Speaker 1 wait till we get a vaccine, wait till we get a vaccine, then we got a vaccine. They're like, well, not everyone's vaccinated, so we have to keep doing everything.

Speaker 4 I keep asking everybody the same question, which is like, is there a reason why

Speaker 4 it's a danger for vaccinated people to not be wearing a mask? So far, I I haven't heard somebody say that it is. And until that time, it's like, I'm fucking, I'm just raw, dog, and air all the time.

Speaker 1 It feels great.

Speaker 4 The entire purpose of doing all this bullshit for the last year was to get to the point where you can take the mask off again. But some people, you're right.

Speaker 4 Some people's brains have been broken where it's like, oh, if you're not wearing a mask, then people think you're Republican. So I don't want to do that.
It's like...

Speaker 4 Everyone should not want to wear a mask. Wearing a mask sucks ass.

Speaker 1 It sucks. I wear a mask now.
The only times I ever wear a mask are on the subway because I just, I feel like everyone's going to do that for the rest of the time.

Speaker 1 Like, I'm actually cool to do that forever on the New York City subways if I get a cold sore I'm going to wear a mask like I which I still haven't had New York City subways we should have been wearing masks a long time ago yes and then I'll wear it like walking into a store if that's what they demand but even then it's like I'm doing it for you not for me like I would take this shit off if you let me but if you're gonna tell everyone they have to I'll fucking play ball I don't care maybe he just got one of those sweet ass masks that have like a political statement on it that say like uh fuck your mask like a bumper sticker on his mask yeah and so he's actually wearing it just as a fuck you to people who are still wearing their masks he's like i can't take it off because then people won't know how much i hate their masks right right all right so here this is this is good it gets good here when i have tried to present him with the science he says scientists don't fully understand the virus yet or i know it probably isn't necessary but wearing it doesn't bother me so if there's even a small chance that it can protect us i'd rather be on the safe side what's the harm actually that's a fine that's a fine response if it doesn't bother you, who the fuck cares?

Speaker 4 Sounds like it bothers his wife, though.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I disagree that there's no harm. I want to see my beautiful husband's face again.
I want to kiss him on the lips romantically like we used to. So they haven't kissed.

Speaker 1 This is fucking weird. And not through a piece of fabric.
He does not change his mask very often and is often smelly and soiled. Oh, you got to be one or the other.

Speaker 1 You can't be full mask all the time, guy, and not. adhere to just like basic common

Speaker 4 you gotta have hygiene you gotta have multiple of them like hats that you put on for different occasions.

Speaker 4 You think he's still like, do you think he's gone down on his wife while still wearing the mask?

Speaker 1 Yeah, for sure. Very hot.
I don't want to feel judged by him for my own behavior, which I consider reasonable. This is making me depressed and concerned about our future together.

Speaker 1 I have asked him when he plans to stop masking, and all he says is when it is safe for everyone. What if this becomes a permanent part of him?

Speaker 1 My mother, who is very conservative, thinks that I should move out, but I don't think I'm ready for that step yet. What I want is my husband back.

Speaker 1 How can I get it through to him and not to blow up anyone's spot? But his name is Jake.

Speaker 4 Oh, interesting.

Speaker 1 Signed maskless and alone.

Speaker 4 That's tough. That's tough.
I mean, maybe he's, what if he just had braces on and he's waiting for like another six months to get him taken off and then boom, perfect smile.

Speaker 1 I do think that there are people, like, they just... They love rules.
Like, the pandemic has been the best.

Speaker 1 Think about someone who just loves rules and authority. The pandemic was a fucking wet dream for them.
It's just everyone told them what to do.

Speaker 4 I really don't have a problem with it if somebody wants to wear a mask, if that's like their thing. I mean, yeah, but

Speaker 4 I don't want to have sex with somebody who's wearing a mask.

Speaker 4 That's my choice. Like, my kink, the thing I'm really turned on by, is having sex with somebody maskless.

Speaker 4 If that makes me a weirdo, then that's my cross.

Speaker 1 I just like the scientists don't fully understand it yet.

Speaker 4 That's a great line. Scientists don't understand anything fully.
That's why it's called science.

Speaker 1 Right. It's ever evolving.

Speaker 4 You have have to yeah it's constantly testing new hypotheses um hank do you still wear a mask

Speaker 2 just on the train yeah i honestly do think the train like we should just do that that should be a law i massachusetts like they ban like ended them on on saturday i think and on friday i walked into dick sporting goods and i thought it with no mask on i got like verbally yelled at really put a mask on you should have pulled out your phone and demanded they kick you out gone viral no but i thought it was gonna be like a kind of like end of school situation where it's like, all right, it's the last week of school, like four days,

Speaker 1 do whatever. Right.
Tomorrow's the day, right? Today's the real day.

Speaker 4 I also think at this point, if you haven't gotten the vaccine, like you've made a choice to not get it yet.

Speaker 4 But I'm not going to change my behavior based on if somebody else made a different choice.

Speaker 1 I can't wait to go to a sporting event. We got to go to a Nets game for our boy Blake.

Speaker 2 I'm going to try and go to the coffee on Saturday.

Speaker 1 Whoa, Hank, Henry. I want to.
Don't want to. I kind of want to.

Speaker 1 What time's the game?

Speaker 2 I think 7 o'clock. We should go.
I don't have anyone to go with us. When is it Friday?

Speaker 1 Saturday. Or would I wear

Speaker 1 a refs uniform?

Speaker 1 Just a third party? Dude, a sports.

Speaker 1 Actually, yes, I'm in. I'm in.
All right, let's go. Yes, I'm in.
I might be late because

Speaker 1 my son doesn't go to bed at 7.

Speaker 1 Oh, all right.

Speaker 1 So I might be a little late, but I'll be there. All right, I'll save you some.
I'll buy his tickets. All right.
All right. 15? There's no

Speaker 2 i'm i'm definitely gonna get out of this but as of right now i'm gonna do it that'd actually be funny just wearing sports it's also like i for the past few years because it does look like an unreal game yes venue to see games at i've been like i kind of want to go an islanders game but i haven't had any real ties to it to go but now just pet the over yeah okay wait what are what are the other dates hmm numbers now i'm gonna get i'm gonna get 51.

Speaker 4 we do we are gonna go to a next game because yeah we said we would go to a next game

Speaker 1 99

Speaker 6 51 5 and 3 out of play

Speaker 1 89

Speaker 1 we'll have guests back on friday we needed a no guest show because we had way too much stuff to give me go over how long animal fact jake 89 how long was this episode 96 minutes

Speaker 1 probably like yeah it would have been like two hours and 20 minutes with a guest probably like animal fact we share 70 of our dna with a slug all right wait when you just said 96 minutes and then it's going to end up being 90 minutes People were like, What'd they cut out?

Speaker 1 Oh, a lot,

Speaker 1 Jesus. Oh, they cut out that thing that Jake said.

Speaker 1 You didn't know it was a hot mic in your defense, okay? Yeah, it was three years ago, so yeah, it was, yeah,

Speaker 1 and it's fine. We were college, yeah, right.
You're wearing a suit at a bar, yeah, it's no big deal, yeah.

Speaker 1 So, you are admitting it,

Speaker 1 it is not me.

Speaker 1 Love you guys

Speaker 1 I don't know what I'm to say, I'd say the way

Speaker 1 Today's another

Speaker 1 day to fight you. Shy it away.

Speaker 1 No, I'll be coming for your love of kid.

Speaker 1 Shy it away.

Speaker 1 No, I'll be coming for your love of kiss.

Speaker 1 Take

Speaker 1 on

Speaker 1 me.

Speaker 1 Take

Speaker 1 me

Speaker 1 on.

Speaker 1 I'll be be

Speaker 1 gone

Speaker 1 too.

Speaker 1 Believe that you say

Speaker 1 I want to say yes.

Speaker 1 But be stone away.

Speaker 1 Further than the life is your faith. Say after me.

Speaker 1 No, it's no better to be safe and silent. Say after me.

Speaker 1 No, it's no better to be safe and silent. Take

Speaker 1 on

Speaker 1 me.

Speaker 1 Take

Speaker 1 me

Speaker 1 on.

Speaker 1 I'll be

Speaker 1 gone.

Speaker 1 But I do want to

Speaker 1 all the things that you say

Speaker 1 in the life of just the frame of very

Speaker 1 things I've got to remember. You shine away

Speaker 1 I'll be coming for you anyway.

Speaker 1 You shine away

Speaker 1 I'll be coming for you anyway.

Speaker 1 Take

Speaker 1 on

Speaker 1 me

Speaker 1 Take

Speaker 1 me

Speaker 1 up

Speaker 1 I'll be

Speaker 1 gone

Speaker 1 I'll be

Speaker 1 your

Speaker 1 day

Speaker 4 It's Pardon My Take presented by Ball Stool Sports.