Final Four Is Set, March Madness Has Killed Us + Dallas Braden Baseball Preview

Speaker 1 Hey, pardon my take, listeners. You can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube.
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Speaker 1 On today's part of my take, we have a final four. We're going to recap the Elite elite eight.
We have update on Jake's One Shining Moment list. One Shining Marshman.

Speaker 1 One Shining Marshmint, Hot Seat Cool Trone, and our good, good friend Dallas Braden on the show because baseball is back on Thursday. So we're talking a little baseball.
We're doing everything.

Speaker 1 We got every kind of sport covered. Oh, and also Kevin Durant is our new champion online.

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Speaker 1 At participating McDonald's. Oh.

Speaker 1 And then I can't name all on the sun. Oh, no, we're gonna rock down to E-LA, Trick Avenue.

Speaker 1 And then we'll take it higher.

Speaker 1 Oh, we're gonna rock down to E-Lay, Trick Avenue. It's part of my take presented by Bar School Sports.

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Speaker 1 Today is

Speaker 1 Wednesday, March 31st.

Speaker 1 And guys, I am

Speaker 1 basketballed out.

Speaker 1 It was a tough couple days. The late start times, I initially was like, you know what? This separates the casuals from the real fans like me.

Speaker 1 If you're willing to stay up until 10 for a tip-off, two school nights in a row of 10 o'clock tip-offs, I think I've seen enough.

Speaker 1 That was a microaggression against me when you tweeted that on Monday night because we were doing a live stream and PFT smartly left after the first game and then tweeted, like, this is when the real men and I'm sitting in the live stream studio being like, fuck, I wish I was home.

Speaker 1 I had my shirt off and I was horizontally on my couch. No, I was literally shirtless, laying down on my couch, being like, oh, all you P-words out there that I can't stand pulling the late hours.

Speaker 1 I think I fell asleep during the second half. I actually left the office.
But yeah, March has taken its toll. It has been an incredible march, an incredible tournament.

Speaker 1 Let's just start with the game we just watched. UCLA is in the Final Four.
What a fucking run. What an ugly game.
But credit to Mick Cronin. Credit to UCLA.
Credit to Hep Cronin.

Speaker 1 As the LA Times put it, step aside, Sister Gene. It's Hep Cronin's NCAA attorney now.
There we go. Hep Cronin, I mean, he was,

Speaker 1 we had eyes on him in the first four

Speaker 1 when they were showing the camera to him. The love to him all first four.
He's got 400 wins as a high school coach. Wow.
Yeah. Didn't know that.
Nate Oates.

Speaker 1 He's an honorary Big Ten guy, too, then. Yeah, that's true.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 I mean, he basically was a Big Ten coach at Cincinnati for the majority of his career. Right.
So it counts. Yeah, I'd say, so he's a Big Ten coach.

Speaker 1 I'm trying to spin.

Speaker 1 Jalen Suggs. Jalen Suggs.

Speaker 1 Bryce Drew. Scott Drew.
Scott Drew looks like Scott Walker, the governor of Wisconsin. He's from Indiana, right? Scott Drew.
That counts. And then California coaches.

Speaker 1 There we go. It's an all-big ten final.

Speaker 1 But yeah, that game,

Speaker 1 Michigan, I don't know what they were doing.

Speaker 1 It was very clear at halftime when they came out in the second half. They're like, all right, we're just going to feed our seven-footer who's better than everyone on the floor.

Speaker 1 And then they did that, and it was effective. And then the last two minutes, they're like, now we're just going to chuck some threes.

Speaker 1 I thought it was weird that they had Hunter inbounding the ball on the last play because

Speaker 1 you got 0.5 seconds left. You want your big guy to catch it, put it up quick.
But I think Jawan Howard was like, you know what? The Wagner family has meant so much to the program.

Speaker 1 We're going to have him get a chance to redeem himself for maybe one of the worst airballs I've seen on a wide open look.

Speaker 1 They're just kids. I just want to throw that out there as a disclaimer, but Wagner

Speaker 1 was so, so bad. And he should get credit for getting Michigan to that part because he did pick up for Livers in this tournament and played very well.
But that was, it's,

Speaker 1 you know, whenever you like talk about injuries and a guy like Livers being out, and I'm not making excuses for Michigan. Yes, I did bet on him.

Speaker 1 Yes, I wanted the Big Ten to have some representation in the Final Four, whatever. I don't ultimately care that much.

Speaker 1 But whenever you have a guy go out, you can survive for a little bit, but you basically need your, you know, next guys up to have those great games and pick up the slack.

Speaker 1 And to expect Wagner to do that every single night, it was probably too much. And it's just, yeah, it was a hell of a game.
But UCLA deserves all the credit.

Speaker 1 Yeah, Juzhang was the best player on the court tonight. They basically are playing football, basketball.
And they're, you know what?

Speaker 1 The most underrated part of what UCLA has been doing in this run, their free throw defense has been phenomenal. For some reason, every team they play just misses all their free throws.

Speaker 1 So credit to them. Does that mean that they foul harder? Yeah, what? So when you step to the line, you're still feeling the effects.
Is that part of Bill Walton, or not Bill Walton?

Speaker 1 Is that part of John Wooten's success pyramid? It is. It is.

Speaker 1 By the way, the success pyramid is back.

Speaker 1 John Wooten.

Speaker 1 And also having the booster that paid everyone who no one talks about at UCLA. Not Mick Cronin's program.
Mick Cronin runs a clean program. What did they shoot from free throw last tonight, Jake?

Speaker 5 Michigan. The internet's bad.

Speaker 1 Oh, no.

Speaker 1 Oh, no. I thought you had that set.
If I get it before you, that's a problem.

Speaker 5 Oh, man, you're probably going to.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 1 Oh, Jake. Are they a sweatier team? Darling bull.
Did they get the ball wet? Oh, my darling bull.

Speaker 1 Six for 11.

Speaker 1 6 for 11.

Speaker 1 So the last two games,

Speaker 1 the UCLA's opponents have gone 17. Quick math in my head, 17 for 36.
That's

Speaker 1 a great free throw defense. Great free throw defense.
So, yeah,

Speaker 1 it was an ugly game, but it was drama. We almost got our buzzer beater.

Speaker 1 That's my computer, ESPN. Shout out ESPN to having more, they have more ads that play when you go on ESPN than our guy Robert Little.

Speaker 1 I've also

Speaker 1 whatever button you hit on your computer while you have any ESPN page somehow it it's the it's the play button yes so like when I was when we're doing like our our Bermans after NFL Sunday and I hit control F to find a player's name on the team control F plays a video yes it's actually Jimmy Petaro the greatest thing he's done for ESPN is just so many autoplays that that's how their revenues come back I think Mike Greenberg is just an autoplay person I think autoplay put him in a chair and he just he gives you a highlight.

Speaker 1 It's autoplay holds up Greenberg's salary. Yes.
That they're like, okay, we're going to sign Greeny to this much money. Well, slap a few more autoplays.

Speaker 1 There's also a great uniform matchup tonight.

Speaker 1 We're, by the way, I'm sure our website has a lot of autoplays as well. Oh, sure.
Throw that out there.

Speaker 1 Just as a general disclaimer for anything that we ever say, we're the biggest hypocrites on earth. Of all time.

Speaker 1 We're a startup, though. I'm including everybody in this.
Like, we are the biggest hypocrites. Yes.

Speaker 1 Yes, the uniform matchup matchup was fantastic. Great, great uniform matchup.
That was probably the only pretty part of this game. Yeah.
It reminded me of Sweden. Yeah.
A lot of blues.

Speaker 1 March Magnus is what I called it. There we go.
Magnus von Magnusson. We're talking world's strongest man while we were watching it.

Speaker 1 Gonzaga rolled. Gonzaga gets to their first final forever.
Congratulations. We can get a lot of good.
Good job. Finally, rest that.
I don't even know why we were still doing that.

Speaker 1 If they lose to UCLA, a team that's already played a playing game on top of all this, I feel like it's not really a final. We have to take take that away from them.

Speaker 1 Gonzaga had the classic situation tonight where everyone is so sick of how good Gonzaga is that they all said to themselves, USC is the toughest opponent they'll ever meet, and this is a terrible matchup for them.

Speaker 1 And I tweeted, obviously, I lost to Michigan Bet, but I said, don't overthink it. Gonzaga's that good.
And they have now, they're 30-0, and 29 of the 30 wins have come by double digits.

Speaker 1 And they're 12. That's insane.
12.5-point favorites going into a Final Four game. That's got to be one of the biggest spreads ever.
What was their only single-digit win? Was it BYU and the

Speaker 5 Championship?

Speaker 1 Oh, geez. I've also seen.
Knick's been down. I don't like it.
We got to boost you up. I'm telling you the truth.
We're going to boost you up this episode.

Speaker 1 There have been a few games that I've watched with Gonzaga

Speaker 1 where they're losing at halftime.

Speaker 1 Yes. Yeah.
So they do have, but they're just that good where they're not going to play 40 minutes of bad basketball. Yeah, Billy? What was this at? Gonzaga.
West Virginia.

Speaker 1 He's trying to steal my shit.

Speaker 5 West Virginia, December 2nd.

Speaker 1 Okay, there it is. Yeah, they beat BYU by 10.
They were down a half in that championship game. Oh, oh, breaking moves.

Speaker 1 Breaking moves.

Speaker 3 I don't like that look at all.

Speaker 1 Bill Walton texts me back. Oh, let's go.
Okay, all right, Bill, let's go. So, right before we started, we were brainstorming.
We're like, who can we get on the show on Friday?

Speaker 1 We're going to try to get Mick Cronin for the people. But then we realized Bill Walton.

Speaker 1 And I realized that I had his number, and I hadn't texted him since 2019 when he texted me back saying, Shine on, dream on, build on, carry on, be dub. He texted just now.
I said, Congrats, Bill.

Speaker 1 What a run for your. I feel like I should have called him coach, just even just coached, yeah.

Speaker 1 Our brother. Yeah, congrats, Bill.
What a run for your Bruins Conference of Champions. And he wrote back, never in doubt.

Speaker 1 Space, space, space, wow. Space, space, space, space, incredible.
Space, space, space, greatest story ever told. Space face, space, face.
Wow. Space face, face, space, space.
We just had a miracle.

Speaker 1 Yes. I love it.
Bill with two L's. What do I do? Follow-up?

Speaker 1 Hey, by the way,

Speaker 1 come on our podcast. Yes.

Speaker 3 Would love you to tell the story on the record on our podcast.

Speaker 1 I like that. Yeah, we'd love to share the story with our audience on the podcast.
I'm going to throw in. All right.

Speaker 1 It would be a miracle of itself. All right.
All right. Who would be the best storyteller? Oh, okay.
All right. You guys, talk amongst yourself real quick.
I'm just going to do this real quick.

Speaker 1 I'm going to think about this.

Speaker 1 I'm going to throw in a Grateful Dead lyric as well. I think I'm going to throw in one from the wheel.
Friend of the devil, Bill,

Speaker 1 Lil Nas X. No, the wheel.
Friend with benefits of the devil.

Speaker 1 I'm going to throw in. I'm going to throw in the.
Okay. Yeah.
All right. All right.
Here we go. Here it goes.

Speaker 1 Unbelievable. So happy for you.

Speaker 1 So happy for you.

Speaker 1 Would love for you to tell

Speaker 1 you to share

Speaker 1 the story on the podcast if you have any free time this week.

Speaker 1 If you have any

Speaker 1 free time.

Speaker 1 Billy, do your hot seat.

Speaker 1 My hot seat is Major, the White House dog that once again

Speaker 1 bit a staff member. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Yeah, sure. That's two thus far, right? He got sent away once, and the second time, he's a repeat offender.
So we need to figure out something to to do with Major.

Speaker 1 I actually, so I suggested that Chaps train Major because that's what Chaps' dog was. I think he'd do a good job at it.
I think Major might just be a badass.

Speaker 1 I think Major just, he might be, you know what? Major might be MAGA.

Speaker 1 And so he's fucking shit up at the White House because he's pissed off. He doesn't want to be there.
Hates the government. Hates the government.
Yeah, Major's a libertarian. Boom.
I like that.

Speaker 1 Yeah, it's not a good look to have the dog. Although, I think it'd be...

Speaker 3 Maybe all the people that thought Trump is just in Biden's body is actually Trump is just in Major's body.

Speaker 1 Freaky Friday switched with the German Shepard. Yeah, I like that.
It would be sick, though, if

Speaker 1 the president, whoever it was at the time, had just a shitload of rowdy pit bulls in the White House that just bit everyone, like attack dogs. That'd be pretty cool.
My cool throne is pro days.

Speaker 1 So there's been a ton of pro days. We've watched all the quarterback stocks

Speaker 1 going around. Seeing the stocks? Zach Wilson had an insane throw where he rolled out left.
Yeah. And then crossbody

Speaker 1 through towards the right pylon, like 70 yards in the middle. Am I dreaming? Yeah.

Speaker 1 What?

Speaker 3 Did we not? Is this we had this exact conversation?

Speaker 1 We talked about this, yeah. No, but just let him cook.
No, but then, but then Justin Fields attempted the same throw, couldn't do it. He went left and through to the left pylon.
And then Kellen Mond.

Speaker 1 Billy, I saw your tweet.

Speaker 3 Is nobody sick if we just did combines of like regular people just doing their

Speaker 1 Kellen Mond was able to do the sick crossbody throwing

Speaker 1 pylon. But I think Fields was intentionally throwing.

Speaker 1 It wasn't like a misthrow. He was aiming.
He obviously couldn't do it because he was trying to imitate it. All right, so retweet.
All right, cut through all your storytelling.

Speaker 1 As entertaining as it is, Mac Jones Pro Day was not good. He did not, he couldn't do the crossbody throw.
Kellen Mond was able to do it. Yeah.
He was sick.

Speaker 1 Yeah, Bill Belichick was watching and he was like shaking his head. No.
It was the opposite of the meme where he puts the binoculars on to get a closer look.

Speaker 1 He was putting the binoculars on the opposite way to look further away from Mac Jones because he was not happy. You should just do stock up, stock down, Billy.
Okay, I'm done. I'm done with the taxes.

Speaker 1 Okay. All right.
Here's what I got. I wrote back, unbelievable, so happy for you.
Would love for you to share the story on the podcast if you have any free time this week.

Speaker 1 We can be totally flexible to your schedule. UCLA back in the Final Four.
And I changed the lyric a little. So the lyric is, I had one of those flashes.
I'd been there before, been there before.

Speaker 1 It's from uh Scarlett Pagonias. I wrote, you had one of those flashes, you've been there before, been there before.
That's good for the final score. That's good, right? That's good.

Speaker 1 I think, I think he's definitely

Speaker 1 good about that. I feel it's that it's out in the world now, but big cat, more importantly, you missed Billy's electrifying recap of quarterback pro days.
Oh, tell me, Zach Wilson, did you do a throw?

Speaker 1 Did you see the sick throw? No, but then they tried to imitate his throws, and the only one who was able to do it was Callan Mond and Justin Fields.

Speaker 1 Future Bear, Future Bear, and then Max Jones, Mac Jones didn't even do any cool threats. Okay, so my hot seat was going to be my hot seat was going to be Mac Jones.
You didn't do any cool threats.

Speaker 1 He also overthrew some people. And we are...

Speaker 1 NFL Twitter is so funny because

Speaker 1 I love when NFL Twitter is like, I'm not even going to watch college basketball. I'm just going to watch Pro Days.

Speaker 1 And there was a bunch of tweets that were essentially reading the body language of Kyle Shanahan and Bill Belichick every time Mac Jones overthrew someone. And they were never...

Speaker 1 Bill Belichick was just watching. No, Bill Belichick did have one clip where he looks to the guy to his right and he's like, nah, it's not good.
And he showed his head.

Speaker 1 But Kyle Shanahan, it was just a clip away. It was a cutaway to Kyle Shanahan, who was staring straight ahead.
And they're like, Kyle Shanahan hates this shit.

Speaker 1 Yeah, Kyle Shanahan's regretting moving up to three now. He wants to, like, he was going to take Mac Jones at number three, anyways.
But you know who had the best pro day?

Speaker 1 Who, Billy? At Old Miss Pro Day?

Speaker 1 Chad Kelly. Kelly.
Yeah,

Speaker 1 swags back. All right, let's get back to basketball.
Thank you, Billy.

Speaker 1 All right. So Gonzaga's a wagon.
That was incredible what they did. The don't overthink it game.

Speaker 1 Didn't you think that it was sometimes when a team's so dominant, we do it with Alabama football all the time where it's like you talk yourself into maybe this will be a close game.

Speaker 1 And I'm doing it right now with UCLA. And it's not going to be.
You have to. It's not going to be.

Speaker 1 Here's why UCLA is going to be a tough game.

Speaker 1 They're not as good as some of the other teams that Gonzag has played recently, but they get the most out of their ability. They're tougher.
It's going to be like playing in off-rhythm somehow.

Speaker 1 Exactly.

Speaker 1 Like, hey, we're not even playing basketball. Exactly.
They're so fucked up. And well, here's the thing about UCLA.
They were really good early this season, and then they just got bad for a while.

Speaker 1 Now they're good again. So they're tapping back into what they had back when I first started watching in November when they were good.

Speaker 1 So they do have it. I think I'm going to bet on UCLA to cover the spread, but

Speaker 1 I don't see it happening. No way.
Gonzaga is just a wagon. And so the other side,

Speaker 1 Baylor, the Must Bust, they tried. It felt like

Speaker 1 they kept on making these runs. They get back to within like seven.

Speaker 1 No,

Speaker 1 they got even closer. They were like, I think they were down four or three

Speaker 1 with maybe five minutes left. They just couldn't hit that big shot

Speaker 1 that really got it like, oh, Baylor's now going to start making plays.

Speaker 1 Incredible season for them. And I don't know.
I mean, that was another one where

Speaker 1 they're just kids. Moses Moody, who's going to be a lottery pick, you know, didn't have his best game.
And he's a freshman. You know what I mean? Like, they're just kids.
Just remind yourself that.

Speaker 1 I think that Baylor is going to shit pump Houston. Well, so Houston deserves credit.

Speaker 1 I'm going to do it. I bashed them.
Then I remember the Dana Holgerson's the coach there.

Speaker 1 They just, I don't know how they do it, but every single game, they just get a million more rebounds than their opponent. And they just,

Speaker 1 I should be, like,

Speaker 1 how I like to play pickup basketball where I can't shoot, can't do anything, can only rebound, I should be a Houston fan.

Speaker 1 Because that's kind of like, if you, if you hear anyone talk about Houston, it's like their defense is unbelievable. Their offensive rebound is unbelievable.
They can't shoot.

Speaker 1 What's their screen game like?

Speaker 1 They just put it back in. The screen game is an important part of your pickup game, too.

Speaker 1 And special shout out to Oregon State, my personal national champion, who finished the season on seven straight games where they covered the spread six out of seven as big money line underdog hits.

Speaker 1 So they deserve, I think they're the spread national champion. And I do want to go back on one thing that we talked about.

Speaker 1 It was right after the first week in college basketball where we were saying how like Baylor should or how Houston should be in the Big 12, but they're not.

Speaker 1 It turns out that it's a classic case of the University of Texas not wanting Houston in there because Texas is always like, we need to be the biggest dick in the biggest vagina possible.

Speaker 1 And guess what? Houston, you're too big of a city. We don't want that competition in state from you.
We want to get the big recruits from your area.

Speaker 1 And so the University of Texas just threw their balls around and kept Houston out. So that's a retraction.
That's an official part of my take. Retraction.

Speaker 1 Yeah, look, they tried to get into the Big 12. Yeah.
And we're Coogs. We're

Speaker 1 hypocrites, too. Yeah, we are hypocrites.
So the Final Four is set. All Texas Final Four on one side.

Speaker 1 And then Gonzaga versus UCLA.

Speaker 1 This is going to be

Speaker 1 not that we care, but there are are people who care.

Speaker 1 Probably the lowest watch Final Four, right? Hmm. You don't have any

Speaker 1 traditional Blue Bloods. I mean, UCLA.
UCLA.

Speaker 1 UCLA Gonzaga is going to be a big game.

Speaker 1 But then it really doesn't matter who Gonzaga would play in the finals. Right.
It's also everything east, nothing east of the Mississippi. Like, you don't have any Big Ten.
You don't have any ACC.

Speaker 1 But again, I don't care. I'm going to watch it.
I'm going to love it. But you know, you'll hear people say that afterwards.
Oh, the ratings, police.

Speaker 1 Even though I have bad news for us. So we started the show talking about how this schedule has completely killed us.
They had the highest ratings of the Elite Eight, I think, ever.

Speaker 1 So they're going to keep this. Because, of course they did.

Speaker 1 A Monday and Tuesday night versus a Sunday and Saturday afternoon. A little perspective.
A year ago today, we would have rearranged our entire weeks.

Speaker 1 We rearranged our entire month to watch one basketball game at 10 p.m. on a Tuesday night.
Fact. Perspective.
Fact. I mean, this tournament's been crazy.

Speaker 1 It's been fucking crazy. We have an 11-seed in, and we still have the two best teams that everyone thought were the best teams since the first ball was tipped still alive.

Speaker 1 You can't really ask for anything more than that. You know what they need to do if they want to goose the ratings? Get more microphones, court side.

Speaker 1 Get a microphone on the rim so you can hear the bricks a little bit louder. The squeaky shoes, this court tonight had squeakier shoes than the other court did.

Speaker 1 They should loosen the rims. Yeah.
Loosen up the rims, NCW. Let, let, let them fill it up.
And chain nets. And chain nets.
Longer nets. We need longer nets.

Speaker 1 All right. What else from the final four?

Speaker 1 Oh, Jake, your one shining moment update?

Speaker 5 Yeah, there's a few. We had three blowouts.

Speaker 1 I don't think Bill Walton's texting me back, guys.

Speaker 1 He's probably just in a state of bliss from reading that text. I might have put him back in an acid drink when I dropped that lyric on his head.

Speaker 1 He's back in like, it's Cornell 72 all over.

Speaker 1 The text was too good. Yeah, it was 77.

Speaker 5 First, we have Oregon State as Big Cath's personal national champions. You just told me to put that on the list.
Yep. No specific shot, but you, the beeves.

Speaker 5 And then Dave had a request of Baylor's Dee Dee Richards getting hurt and emotional after the injury on the women's side.

Speaker 5 She was getting great.

Speaker 1 The tournament.

Speaker 1 The Yukon Baylor women's game was better than any Elite Eight game in the men's side. For sure.
It was an incredible game.

Speaker 5 Yeah. So, shout out to the women's attorney.
Mark Vital, put back slam for Baylor.

Speaker 5 A Corey Kispert III, he's made plenty of them. One of those will get put in there.
Johnny Duzang on UCLA tonight had an ugly bank shot that went home.

Speaker 1 Maybe that'll be a shot.

Speaker 1 I would say him limping off the court and then coming back. Yeah.
That too.

Speaker 1 Wagner's missed three might be on there.

Speaker 5 I don't know if that'll make the list.

Speaker 1 You don't think so?

Speaker 1 It was a good shot because it's the agony of defeat. Yeah, all right, I'll throw it in.
And it might be at the 64. Yeah, Hunter Dickinson screaming.
I have that next. Hunter Dickinson getting excited.

Speaker 1 Jake, my apologies. That's okay.
No, I wasn't like mad. No.

Speaker 1 Listen, settle down.

Speaker 1 Are you okay, Jake? That was a joke.

Speaker 1 Relax.

Speaker 5 Hep Cronin, just something.

Speaker 1 Yeah, something. Hep Cross.
It might just be Hep Cronin. It might just be 68 shots.
It might be.

Speaker 5 Like, I tweeted the other day how they show Hep a lot. But they literally showed him eight times after the game was over.
Yeah. They show the buzzer beater miss, and then they show Hep.

Speaker 1 And Hep, every time there's a big moment that ends up going in his favor It takes him like a full two seconds to react to it afterwards It's always everybody around him.

Speaker 1 They start swarming him and he still hasn't blinked yet. He hasn't shown he's just like thank God.
He's just got more relief than he does joy sometimes.

Speaker 5 Yeah, and then UCLA It seems like they have good chemistry because the bench always has their arms around each other.

Speaker 1 Yeah,

Speaker 1 they got the UCLA bros. Yeah.
Okay. That's where we're at right now.
One shining good. Good list.
Yeah, final four.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 5 The last like 30 to 45 seconds of the montage are entirely the final four usually. And it'll be a voiceover of like gymnast, one night, and here we go for all the marbles.
Right.

Speaker 1 It'll be that. That's true.
Yeah. That's true.
They do do

Speaker 5 the final edit.

Speaker 1 It's like red knots. It kind of blows you up.

Speaker 5 Right, because you see that Greg Gumble, they're like killing some time at the desk for like 30 minutes.

Speaker 1 That's what they're doing. Yeah, they're editing.

Speaker 1 When they cut the nets down, all that stuff. How would you cut the nets down if they were chain?

Speaker 5 Chainsaw. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Fuck. They should do that.
I mean, you have to.

Speaker 5 I thought you were going to say, How could you cut the nets down? I've done it before, not a big deal. deal.

Speaker 1 What?

Speaker 5 America East Championship 2019. You weren't going to be able to do that.

Speaker 1 Cut down the net.

Speaker 5 There's a video in pictures.

Speaker 1 I don't know if that's. Is that? I'm part of the team.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 1 If I was a neutral broadcaster,

Speaker 1 I'd part of the team.

Speaker 1 Tier 1 traveling party. You keep the nylon?

Speaker 5 Yeah, I have it. It's in Florida.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 Did you frame it? No, I should. You should make a bracelet out of it.
Quick question. Billy, how many America East Championships did you win?

Speaker 1 Zero. Oh,

Speaker 1 that's tough. Who's the real athlete? Ooh.

Speaker 1 That is tough. Do you have a ring?

Speaker 1 No ring. Fuck.

Speaker 1 We should make you one. Anyone who's listening who's a ring maker, please make one for Jake.

Speaker 1 I would love to see them do how they do the Stanley Cup right after it's won, where they cut backstage to see the guy making the trophy, etching the names in.

Speaker 1 I would love to see them have a camera on the guy that's editing, like just sitting down with Final Cut opened up on his computer. It's like adding the last bits to it.
He should be in it. Yeah.

Speaker 1 he should be in One Shining Moment. It should be the end.
He should be the last one where he hits export.

Speaker 1 And that's the end of it. Yeah.
No, that's the start of it. That would be great.
Oh, yeah. Like he sends it.
Yes. Yeah.
And it starts. Whoa, mind-blown.
Yeah. That's fucked up.

Speaker 1 Bill Walton would die if he saw that. Bill Walton.

Speaker 1 No, I'm actually worried that he might be

Speaker 1 in a different dimension.

Speaker 1 Imagine dying from a text that blew your mind too much from Big Cat. Like, where have

Speaker 1 I met Big Cat in a former life?

Speaker 1 It was only 9:30 there. I was there.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I was.

Speaker 1 I hope he responds. If not, I will definitely try to just call him and be like, hey, we're taping.

Speaker 1 All right. Hot seat cool ton.
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Henry.

Speaker 3 Oh, my hot seat's Michael Strahan.

Speaker 1 Oh, yeah.

Speaker 3 I saw that. He got rid of the gap in his teeth.

Speaker 1 Oh, that sucks. I thought he was always, his whole line was like, I'll never get rid of it.

Speaker 3 That's my point.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 That'd be like Anthony Davis shaving his eyebrow. Mm-hmm.
Yeah. That's weird.
Right.

Speaker 3 And he already had the TV job. He had everything like established.

Speaker 1 It's basically like Erlacher getting hair. Yeah.
Straight into it. But Erlacher was more when he was getting into TV.

Speaker 3 Michael Strahan is already, you know, he's running shit.

Speaker 1 He's been everywhere. Right.
He's like the king of TV. Right.
What if he doesn't get any more jobs because of the

Speaker 1 TTV? I mean,

Speaker 1 what if that's weird?

Speaker 3 His approval rating will probably.

Speaker 1 I mean, people are used to seeing the gap, and it's like, you know, everyone needs to be.

Speaker 3 Embrace your imperfections, dude. Yeah.

Speaker 1 I agree with that, Hank.

Speaker 1 At this point, you sold out.

Speaker 1 If you had done this right after you stopped playing, because you're like, I didn't want to get it fixed before I was done getting hit in my face all the time, I would understand that.

Speaker 1 But then afterwards, no, I don't like it. That's why I don't get breast reduction surgery.
Jonah Hill. Right.
Well, no, he just got skinny.

Speaker 1 Yeah, for Moneyball, and then he was like, I'm not getting any rolls skinny. No, but he's skinny right now.
I got fat again. Yeah, you're funnier when he's false.
He's skinny.

Speaker 1 That's why Big Cat's hilarious tonight. Yeah.

Speaker 1 I am so fat right now. I need to

Speaker 1 honestly need to lose some weight. I think we spend so much time around each other that

Speaker 1 I think you look good right now.

Speaker 1 Well,

Speaker 1 I have been on a diet for two days. Okay.
So that's probably what's what I noticed. But yeah,

Speaker 1 let's say March is taking its toll. I wake up with a stomachache most days.

Speaker 1 From eating too much the night before. That's a bad sign.
Hank, your cool throne.

Speaker 3 My cool throne was people on the West Coast, because the Sweet 16 ratings were the best they've ever been, or like the best in like 30 years.

Speaker 3 So they're going to probably continue to do this ridiculous late-night schedule going forward, which sucks.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Thoughts and prayers to all the kids out there.

Speaker 1 Got to get up early for their Zoom meetings. And podcasters.
Yeah, mostly for us.

Speaker 1 Really, mostly for us. Is that it, Hank? Yeah.
Okay. My hot seat is capital letters.
Capital letters on the hot seat.

Speaker 1 The Miami Marlins renamed their stadium tonight, and it's it's the Lone Depot Park. Ooh.
And Lone Depot is with a lowercase L, and they specified this. Park is always to be written with a lowercase P.

Speaker 1 That's the official name. Here's a real woe.
I didn't realize this till today, or I never thought about it until today.

Speaker 1 The lowercase P is the same as the uppercase P just moved down, just like a little bit lower.

Speaker 1 Yeah, but it's the exact same letter. Yeah, well, isn't it bigger too when it's uppercase? It might be.
Yeah. They make it smaller.

Speaker 1 Barely, but if you were to move the lowercase P up to the normal of an uppercase letter, it would look small. But it would be the same.
Basically, a perfectly average-sized letter. Same but different.

Speaker 1 A little bit different, yeah. But so from that.

Speaker 1 For now, we need to specify that it's a lowercase p. If I see anybody putting an uppercase P out there, I'm going to report you to, I don't know, a Bud Seelig.

Speaker 1 We should do that with pardon my take and then just resell all the merch. Be like, if you're with the uppercase P merch, it's illegal.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I like it.

Speaker 1 When players change their numbers. Yeah, new segment, it's called Part and My Take, and it's whenever we talk about the Miami Marlins ballpark.

Speaker 1 Yep, I like it.

Speaker 1 My cool throne is Hugh Jackson. Oh.
If you've been wondering what Hugh Jackson's up to recently, I have not.

Speaker 1 Well, he's doing a media tour again.

Speaker 1 So good for Hugh. He likes to come out of the woodwork every like, I don't know, eight months and remind people that he's not a bad coach.
Mike Silverwritten anything about him?

Speaker 1 He was not involved in this, but I'm sure that

Speaker 1 I'm sure it was Mike's idea to go on the air and say this. In his interview in Cleveland, Hugh Jackson told people that when he went 1-23, he got a secret contract extension.
Oh.

Speaker 1 But he was told not to disclose that. And so it was a super secret contract extension.
Technically, he's still the head coach of the Browns.

Speaker 1 This is actually the best spin zone that Hugh Jackson's ever done. And he is, that's all that Hugh Jackson does is try to find spend zones.

Speaker 1 Technically, Hugh Jackson got the Browns to the playoffs this year. Yeah, because he's still employed.
He's the shadow coach of the Cleveland Browns. God.

Speaker 1 I just respect the hell out of Hugh for not giving up, for

Speaker 1 dying on the hill of saying 1 in 31 is actually not a bad head coaching record.

Speaker 1 Someone, Hugh needs a friend who can just be like, Hugh, maybe instead of just hitting on every girl at the bar, maybe just chill out and see if maybe any like come up and talk to you.

Speaker 1 Because it's getting a little desperate. It's starting to reek of desperation.
He's wearing me down. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Yikes. He's wearing wearing me down.
But I do like the idea that he is the shadow head coach.

Speaker 1 I'm going to consider Hugh Jackson the shadow, the actual head coach of the Browns until I think he's got like another year

Speaker 1 left. Yeah.
Yeah. Okay.
All right. My hot seats is Jake, because Jake, you ready to do it? He is going to read us some of Kevin Durant's Instagram DMs to Michael Ratport.
Maybe not the,

Speaker 1 maybe just the ones, the last ones that Dave posted. Maybe just read those.
Yeah, there you go. So Kevin Durant is the most online person of all time.
I think he has done the impossible.

Speaker 1 Usually when people are more online, they become worse people. Like, I know I'm a worse person for being online all the time.
Kevin Durant has become more likable by being online more.

Speaker 1 Yeah, well, I don't know if he's been online more. He's been higher concentrated on one account online.

Speaker 1 He stays online. He's saying it with his chest online.
Like, people who stay online just suck. Yes, Kevin Durant, I agree.
I think we used to call him the baby back bitch on this show. No.

Speaker 1 Now I think he's super cool, Kevin. Yeah, no, he is super cool, Kev.
Yeah. Yeah, no, he's...

Speaker 1 And we're not just trying to say this because we've actually made a turn on him like a year ago. I feel like.
We've been like, yeah, actually, we kind of like him.

Speaker 1 And I think it helped that he left the Warriors, even though he just has even more of a super team on the Nets. But that's fine.

Speaker 1 The Nets don't hurt anyone. No.
The Nets are like just

Speaker 1 whatever. They're kind of around.
They're just seeing the title. It's just like, okay.

Speaker 1 There aren't that many Nets fans even in the New York area. No, no.
I live in Brooklyn. I think it's just.
I don't see anyone wearing Nets gear ever. So I'm cool with the Nets.
The Nets are just.

Speaker 1 Well, yeah, we want Blake to win, obviously. That's what I was going to say, Jake.

Speaker 1 Okay, go ahead. You just got double-crossed.
Yeah. Yeah, you did get double-crossed big time.
The ultimate double cross. You thought I wasn't going to bring up Blake.

Speaker 1 Wow.

Speaker 1 He's probably listening to this podcast.

Speaker 1 These are

Speaker 1 Kevin Durant's Instagram DMs to Michael Rappaport.

Speaker 1 You called your lawyer like the pussy. You are.

Speaker 1 That's how many hahas were in it. And he did it like that.

Speaker 5 You couldn't talk portnoy talking.

Speaker 1 Shit.

Speaker 5 Defamation of character, crying emojis.

Speaker 1 Pussy.

Speaker 1 Ass.

Speaker 1 Want a lawyer up.

Speaker 5 Your wife, mad ass fuck

Speaker 1 because you wasting that little bit of money on a lawyer because you can't take a joke. Ha ha,

Speaker 1 how pussy are you?

Speaker 5 Your wife doesn't even respect your bitch ass.

Speaker 1 And now, Michael Rabbor posted these himself. Yeah, he thought he made it look good.
Yeah, he was like, you know what? It's going to be cool if I post Kevin Durant owning me. Yeah, right.

Speaker 1 It was a very bizarre decision.

Speaker 1 You know what? He needs to sue himself for defamation for posting those.

Speaker 1 Seriously.

Speaker 1 KD, yeah, cool guy, Kev. We need to drink after you.

Speaker 1 It's of Manhattan with Malibu, and it thinks it's a gosling.

Speaker 1 All right, my cool throne is Spotify because they invented radio. So they

Speaker 1 have invented a way for everyone to listen to podcasts live. Maybe people call in on the Subway Hot Fresh Line.
I don't know. But yeah,

Speaker 1 I just love where we're at as a society that we just keep reinventing old things that we've talked about it with cable that's going on right now.

Speaker 1 They have at some point someone's going to be smart enough to bundle all the subscription services we have and then I'll buy just that from like a third party, Comcast or someone, Verizon.

Speaker 1 In like a year, people are going to be like, you know what? We love watching movies at home, but it's really fun to watch movies with a bunch of friends.

Speaker 1 So why don't we make like a giant screen and then people can all go watch it together. Yes.
So we just keep reinventing old things.

Speaker 1 But yeah, radio is now back and radio is on the cool throne and Spotify is on the cool throne. Way to go, guys.
So there was a meeting that Big Cat and I had like four years ago.

Speaker 1 I forget exactly who it was with, but it was like one of these tech companies, I think. And they were talking to us about doing like different stuff with part of my take with them.

Speaker 1 And they suggested...

Speaker 1 what if we could do like a live element of the podcast where listeners could call in and actually like give you feedback and you could get their takes and talk to them and me and big cat looked at each other and big Cat looked over at them, and he goes, Did you just invent the radio?

Speaker 1 I'm like, Okay, cool.

Speaker 1 I, it's, I, I wish I had, uh, I mean, I do, we do reinvent things on this show all the time, but it's just so funny when they like do the press release and no one just proofreads and like, hey, wait, I think this is radio.

Speaker 1 And they actually threw in, I'll give Spotify credit, they threw in concerts too because you can now listen to bands play live

Speaker 1 and maybe even go see them live. You know, it'd be cool.
That's a concert. You know, it'd be cool if they did that.

Speaker 1 Like, they took the concept that they invented right now, but they kind of made it micro-centralized in different locations.

Speaker 1 Because, like, if I'm in Washington, D.C., I want to hear more talk about the football team or the Capitals. If you're in Chicago, you want to hear about the Bears.

Speaker 1 And so, maybe if they had a bunch of different podcasts that they had do this

Speaker 1 for each different city, and then you could get even local advertisers to do like smaller deals, but it was more impactful because of the local market. Here's an issue, though, PFT.

Speaker 1 I was thinking about this. So they're like, hey, you can listen live to Joe Rogan, but what if you miss it live?

Speaker 1 They should be able to store it, and then you should be able to download it like on your phone. And what are we going to call it? And then listen to it afterwards.

Speaker 1 Hmm.

Speaker 1 Audio on demand. Okay,

Speaker 1 Galaxy cast.

Speaker 1 Postcast. Oh, I like that.

Speaker 1 Tune into our postcast later. I like it a lot.
Alex Jones used to call it his retransmission. That sounds way cooler.
Yes. Jake, do you have a hot seat cool thrown before we get to Dallas Braden?

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 5 Hot seat is Bruce Arians. He got a tattoo of the Bucs winning the Super Bowl, and the last time a coach got a tattoo of a championship.
Didn't end well.

Speaker 1 I'm not going to say who.

Speaker 5 But I have respect. I want to protect my guys.

Speaker 1 Wait, wait, wait.

Speaker 1 The last time a coach got a tattoo on a shoulder of a championship, that very same coach went overseas, dominated the Greek market, came back to New York, and made the NCAA tournament in his very first year.

Speaker 1 Yep.

Speaker 1 Stat That coach? Yep.

Speaker 1 Stat Hall of Famer? So it should be Cool Throne. Yeah.
Bruce Arians. Make his bust right now.

Speaker 5 Yeah, exactly.

Speaker 1 Have him bust right now.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 1 Good ones.

Speaker 1 That wasn't a joke. No, what? Seriously, Big Cat.
That wasn't a joke. Big Cat, you're trying to get me killed? No, that wasn't a joke.

Speaker 5 And then Cool Throne is Jim Nance because it is Jim Nance week next week. Final four to Masters.
Plus, get ready for the storyline. He's calling his alma mater in the Final Four, Houston.

Speaker 1 Oh, yeah.

Speaker 1 Only Jake. Only Jake would know that one of them is a good one.
That's cool.

Speaker 1 Yeah, but it's also. Is he going to be able to do that conflict? Impartially?

Speaker 1 Jake, he has an award named after him.

Speaker 1 What is it called?

Speaker 5 Remember in my interview?

Speaker 1 No.

Speaker 5 I got ninth place in 2018.

Speaker 1 In the Gym Dance Award. Yeah.
Got it. You don't remember that? I do.

Speaker 1 No, you don't. No, I do.
You do? You looked it up because you thought it was a fake award. Ion Eagles' son won it.

Speaker 1 He was up there, yeah. What?

Speaker 1 He didn't win it? He got second.

Speaker 5 My other friend got first.

Speaker 1 Got it. Everyone does great, though.
Top 10. Yeah.
I mean, you were ranked at the end of the season.

Speaker 5 Yeah, everyone's great, though.

Speaker 1 When they expand the playoffs, you still wouldn't make it, but that's still good. What do you mean? Like when they expand the playoffs to eight,

Speaker 1 you still would be on the outside. You still wouldn't make it, but you'd be the first team out.
You could be on the first team. You'd be the team leader of the bait.

Speaker 1 Yeah, we'd be like, Jake Marsh deserved to be in the playoffs. Yeah, if I and Eagle's son got COVID, you would reflect on it to me.
That's not nice.

Speaker 1 No.

Speaker 1 But wait, Jake, you just said that Jim Nance will be able to do it impartially because he has a trophy named after him. Well, that just shows how credible he is.
How impartial he is. Yeah.

Speaker 1 I don't know about that. The reputation.

Speaker 1 I'm going to keep an eagle eye on Jim Nance.

Speaker 1 What? No, but everyone

Speaker 1 on the list. I guess that was right.
Whether he made it or didn't make it, you're all great broadcasters, so keep up the good work. Yeah, you're the real MVPs.
Yeah. Right.

Speaker 1 all right, let's get to our interview with Dallas Brayden talking some baseball. What's up, guys? It's Big Cat here, making my Irish entrance with proper number 12 Irish whiskey.

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Speaker 1 So get out there and make your Irish entrance. Anything else just wouldn't be proper.

Speaker 1 Okay, we now welcome on our good friend, co-worker. It is Dallas Braden.
He once threw a no-hitter. We all know that.

Speaker 1 Dallas.

Speaker 1 What's that like? I've never. You threw a game with no hits.
We don't have to go down this path again. Great to see you.

Speaker 1 How's it going? Great to talk to you. Baseball is back on Thursday.

Speaker 1 So let's talk some baseball. I have a very important question to start off.
Fire. How dead are the balls?

Speaker 6 Not as dead as you might think, man. Not as dead as you might think.

Speaker 6 We've seen guys fist some johnnies out you know what i mean we've seen some some like what the how did that ball creep out sort of moments as well but it's arizona so the ball flies those are the games i'm watching florida maybe not so much but but nonetheless um but that is something to pay attention to because the the reason spring training might not give you a lot of information there is because those balls

Speaker 1 can at times be a mixed bag if you will a mixed satchel of balls that they're throwing out do you think that they kind of do some a-b testing during spring training where they know which balls are juiced, which ones aren't, and they kind of monitor those?

Speaker 6 There are conversations about that, PFT, but there's nobody that's going to

Speaker 6 raise their hand and be like, yeah.

Speaker 6 that's going on because we've had we've had conversations where folks have come out and outright just completely denied the idea that any sort of tampering of any kind could be going on with balls right like who who can't just raise their hand and be like yeah i was i was touching the balls i was like Yeah.

Speaker 1 So, all right. So, the balls might not be a big deal.
I've heard it's somewhere around, like, you would take about five feet off of every home run.

Speaker 1 So, so that

Speaker 1 seems like it will, over a long season, will obviously change it a little bit.

Speaker 1 What about the other ball question I have? What about these humidors?

Speaker 1 So, some teams have the humidors, and apparently there's some more humidors that have been installed in different stadiums.

Speaker 1 And for people who don't follow baseball or know what's going on, essentially some stadiums, there's five stadiums that we don't even know they have humidors. We know like Arizona and Colorado do.

Speaker 1 And it takes the moisture out of the ball or no, keeps the moisture in the ball, deadens the ball. Where the hell are these humidors, Dallas?

Speaker 6 I mean, these things are like under lock and key, right? Like same sort of like

Speaker 6 Federal Reserve type security. Can't let any tampering of any sort going on.

Speaker 1 so just like you know just like you or i you know you're trying to keep track of who's touching whose balls they got those things monitored 24-7 you're not just you know they're not letting just any old tom dick or hairy get get near those balls so they've got those things stored away people are watching those things right right but what i think big cat's asking is which teams are the ones that have them not not like where do they keep them like fort knox buried underneath is it because if i'm looking down the list of highest altitude stadiums you've got the rockies diamondbacks then after them, Braves, Royals, Twins, Pirates.

Speaker 1 Would it make sense that the highest altitude stadiums have them? So, Twins have one. There's some teams that we know have them, but there's also some new ones that we don't know.
Only baseball.

Speaker 1 This is why baseball, like the fact that we're even having this conversation, like, hey, they changed the ball.

Speaker 1 Could you imagine going into a football or basketball season and being like, we think they changed the thing that they play with, but we don't actually know what they're doing?

Speaker 1 I mean, look at what they did.

Speaker 6 Look at what they did with QB12. I mean, they crucified that individual, as well as some other ball fondler, right? And he got, I mean, like, lives were changed forever when that happened.

Speaker 6 So, like, yeah, you're right. Like, baseball, like, it's, it's odd that they can just sort of all willy-nilly, like, go, go tossing balls to and fro and really not have anybody to answer to.

Speaker 1 Right. When you pick up a ball, can you tell, like, right off the bat, like, yeah, this one's going to sail?

Speaker 6 Uh, yeah. Well, I mean, not necessarily that this one's going to sail.
What you can tell right away is

Speaker 6 how, like, just how hard this is.

Speaker 6 And I, I guess, actually, PFT, yeah, to a point that it's gonna sail, uh, but more so, how it's gonna sail out of your hand, and then you kind of know what that end result's gonna be like if you can't control this thing.

Speaker 6 But you feel how hard it is, you feel uh, the height of the laces, the width of the laces, like you feel all of that.

Speaker 6 I did a thing, um, I actually interviewed an astrophysicist, Meredith Wills, who um out of the Oakland Coliseum. And we tested multiple baseballs.

Speaker 6 And like, I could, she, she ran a test on me, and I could grab the ball, and I could identify, you know, what year it was from. And that's just because you grab it every day.

Speaker 6 You know what the difference is if you were to feel something foreign.

Speaker 1 Right. Can we do a headline grab? Because I want to get you to talk some percentages for us.
So we're going to toss out the Oakland A's. So this does not involve the athletics.

Speaker 1 Out of the non-Oakland A's teams in Major League Baseball, what percentage of them do you think have a pitcher who doctors the ball?

Speaker 6 Ooh, okay, doctors the baseball. Now, I would have to ask you to define, just so I understand what parameters I'm working under here,

Speaker 1 what is doctor? Right, so I feel like we're overdue for a spitball scandal. That's something that hasn't happened in baseball in a while.
So I'm talking spit. I'm talking like a little Vaseline.

Speaker 1 I'm talking a nail file. I'm talking a foreign substance that is knowingly being

Speaker 1 used as contraband and kept on the pitcher's person. Now, it gets kind of dicey when you're like, is that too much pine tar? Is there pine tar on like one of his knuckles or whatever?

Speaker 1 I'm talking like, it's got to be a big glob for pine tar to count. But like another foreign substance.
What, I'll put it this way, what percentage of non-athletics

Speaker 1 pitchers in general do you think are doctoring the ball in some way, shape, or form?

Speaker 6 I would say probably somewhere in the

Speaker 6 north of 80%.

Speaker 1 Oh, that's so high. Does baseball have a ball doctoring problem? Damn.

Speaker 6 In terms of guys that just like that would use pine tar or something of that nature,

Speaker 6 but in terms of guys who would even be in the realm of like nail-file Vaseline type stuff, those are egregious offenses that

Speaker 6 you don't see today

Speaker 6 just because the game is watched and monitored to the extent that it is.

Speaker 6 But what you do to substitute that is if balls are scuffed, you know, a ball gets thrown in the dirt, whatever, you do your best if you can, if you're somebody who knows how to use that scuff to try to get that baby back because you do know how to control that.

Speaker 6 That's adding a rudder to the baseball. And now you can make that thing move in ways that the dude, like, you know what I mean?

Speaker 6 If you've already faced me twice and you know what my shit is doing, you know what it's looking like, and now I get a scuffed ball and I add eight nine inches of movement to that in the seventh inning in a big spot you're going what the hell was that and all it was was a stuff my stuff is still terrible it's just moving a lot more now and you didn't expect that okay um so let's talk some teams let's talk some teams um

Speaker 1 I want to start with probably the most interesting team coming into this year because of their new ownership. It's the New York Mets.
So Steve Cohen takes over.

Speaker 1 My question to you is, you talk to players, you talk to people around the league.

Speaker 1 How much does it change the perception of the Mets when it comes to free agents or guys wanting to go play there, knowing that Steve Cohen has, like, people,

Speaker 1 I think people don't fully grasp just how much more rich Steve Cohen is than everyone else.

Speaker 1 It's insane. It's like we joke, like, oh, what is he going to do? Buy a World Series? Well, yeah, he very well could because he has that much.
He has double the money of like the next guy.

Speaker 1 So how much does that change the perception of players and people around the league?

Speaker 6 I think initially the shock value is there. You're excited about it because you're like, yo, Uncle Moneybags is in the house.

Speaker 6 Let's start breading all of these chickens up and passing out titties to everybody. Let's do that, Uncle Stevie.
And that's what you kind of have to wait to be seen now, right?

Speaker 6 Like, when does the Lindor extension go down? Does that go down? How does that work out? Maybe Confordo as well. Like, how do they play this? That's what you're waiting to see.

Speaker 6 So you can be excited about what the dude represents initially that's going to make some noise but after the noise calms has he kicked any dust like what's or is there movement what do we got show me right and from there that's where the money and and the the the walking the walk talking the talk put your money where your mouth is type of stuff gets answered and and that's where we'll be able to reflect and go we were excited about that but your boy couldn't even come up with the money to lock up Francisco Lindor, the dude who could have been the face of their future, the face of the franchise.

Speaker 6 They couldn't figure that out.

Speaker 6 I thought Uncle Stevie was supposed to be this guy this savior what happened we'll be having that conversation if it doesn't happen yeah so around the league how does that is is there like an impact on uh players in general like knowing that one of the richest people in america has now purchased a team so there's more money that's going to be spent eventually like is the level of competition baseball going to go up a little bit just knowing that free agent salaries are probably going to go up because you got daddy warbucks over here ready to shell it out well dude pft and let's roll out i mean come on can we just put some some can we get let's extend the league by two just so mark cuban can have something to do with the money in his ashtray like let's do that yeah let's get him involved as well and you want to see what happened like it's going to be the colin cuban bowl right i mean like that's what it's going to be i would i'm here for that absolutely but that's talking as a player who would love to see this money just get thrown around to these dudes but yeah To answer the question, it does change the perception initially because you're like, oh, did they just become a real player?

Speaker 6 You know, it's like that first time you walk in to test drive a car and you're like,

Speaker 6 you don't have to do that background check on your boy anymore, right? Right?

Speaker 1 You know what I mean? I'm happy you brought up Mark Cuban. So this is, to put it into perspective, Mark Cuban, everyone thinks, oh, that's the rich guy.
Steve Cohen has $10 billion more than him.

Speaker 1 $10 billion more than Mark Cuban. That's insane.

Speaker 1 It's laughable. Yeah, it's clearly going to change a lot of things, especially in the NL.
Now, in terms of the NL, I would assume that everyone's kind of line is it's the Dodgers Dodgers to lose.

Speaker 1 The Dodgers and the Padres are going to be a great race out west. The East, you have, you know, the Mets and the Braves and maybe toss in the Nationals.
And then the Central just sucks. I'll admit it.

Speaker 1 Like, the Central, who knows who's going to come to the Central. So give us, yeah, the overall landscape of the NL as you see it.

Speaker 6 Well, I think

Speaker 6 you kind of did a great job of wrapping it all up when you hit the Dodgers and you hit the competition that is them between the Padres.

Speaker 6 That's a great new rivalry that has sort of taken the place of the Giants Dodgers without the Giants being as competitive as they are.

Speaker 6 So to know that that division is going to have some have some tension at some point, that's fun. That's exciting.

Speaker 6 And let's not forget, and Jared does a great job, my partner on Starting 9, download, subscribe,

Speaker 6 does a great job of pointing out that the Braves, like it was essentially the Braves and they blew it and handed it to the Dodgers.

Speaker 6 And so that's what's going to be really exciting to watch is those teams right there, that division battle, but then the Braves and

Speaker 6 what are the Mets going to do? Because I don't know that whatever the central turns out to be is going to be competitive enough to compete with any one of those two division winners. So from there,

Speaker 6 I do think the conversation.

Speaker 6 starts with the Dodgers and very well could end with the Dodgers.

Speaker 1 Okay, so I have a take, and I want you to judge it here because I do think the Padres are electric. The Padres are a lot of fun to watch.
Yes. Fernando Tatis Jr.

Speaker 1 We're all excited about watching him. He hasn't even had, essentially, I think he's under 600 plate appearances in his career.

Speaker 1 Is there a chance he might not have a great season because people figure him out and it's quote-unquote sophomore slump, even though it's his third year?

Speaker 1 And is there a chance that happens and we maybe got a little bit ahead of ourselves with the hype?

Speaker 6 Well,

Speaker 6 there's always that chance and that's what's going to be interesting about him is to see what adjustments are made.

Speaker 6 Because what's cool and interesting about this dude and his adaptability is at one point in time last year or the year before, I believe, when he struggled, who did he call?

Speaker 6 He called his dad in, right, former big leader, brought his dad in, and they just start grinding in the living room, going to work, watching a game or two, and then locking in the adjustments that they probably made on the drive over from the airport.

Speaker 6 And if he's got that kind of feel and that kind of adaptability, how does that come about when and if he starts to struggle? And to what extent does he start to struggle?

Speaker 6 Because the pressure to compete with the Dodgers is going to be very real.

Speaker 6 So, on top of competing against a league that's making adjustments to him, he has to figure out how to divvy up that pressure and performance and create a balance for himself where he's now not relying, like, you know what I mean?

Speaker 6 He's not trying to move that in. Right.
Is he? Right. So, so, yes, there's always that slope you're riding on.
Could

Speaker 6 That's the question. People are like, did we give him too much money? Did they give him too much money to not really have an idea? And it's like, look,

Speaker 6 that dude's going to sell tickets, and he has already shown you superstar capability. Now it's about sustainability.

Speaker 1 Right. Right.

Speaker 1 What about the American League? Do you think that there's a chance that this year is the year where the Yankees will finally win that World Series, get in the discussion of elite franchises?

Speaker 1 It's been a while since they've been there. Been a while since they won.
It's actually the first decade in, I think, 100 years that they didn't go to the World Series. It's crazy.
That's unfortunate.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I mean, right now,

Speaker 1 they're little brother in this town right now. It's like the Mets are the talk of the town.

Speaker 6 Oh, they absolutely are. Yeah, the Yankees are going to be the rotten core of that apple if things continue to trend this way.

Speaker 6 I mean, they've got the home run here to the strongest man in baseball, Luke Voigt.

Speaker 6 He's got to go get meniscus cleaned up because he's carried the Yankees quite literally literally bad foot bad wheel now like this is how it goes when luke voigta is carrying the club boys it's got it's a it's a tough come on yeah i don't know it's about health again for those dudes and you hate to put it on that but when you've got the behemoths you have in the lineup and they've been the question marks there's really like

Speaker 6 there's not much assessing to be done after that in my opinion same thing can be said about the starting rotation like garrett cole cool what's dv gonna look like you know like what are the guys after the Cy Young favorite look like?

Speaker 6 And for me, it's just always going to be health with that lineup.

Speaker 1 Always. So, in the AL, the Yankees are, I think they're the presumptive favorite.
The White Sox, it feels like this is going to be a year where they're going to make a lot of noise.

Speaker 1 Although Eli's injury was, that was insane that they even had him out there. I don't understand that.

Speaker 1 I actually want to say, I want to say Theo won the trade because he knew that he was a detriment to himself in the field.

Speaker 1 And then there's a few others. I mean, obviously the Rays have played.
They were in the World Series last year.

Speaker 1 Give us maybe like a dark horse team in the AL that you could see making it a deep run in the playoffs.

Speaker 6 Ooh, a deep run in the playoffs.

Speaker 6 And you're talking

Speaker 6 outside of the White Sox

Speaker 6 because

Speaker 6 I think they've got the central, I don't want to say pretty locked up or taking care of. I mean, look, this might be a homer call,

Speaker 6 but there's no reason that the Oakland Ace, there's no reason that the Oakland A's

Speaker 6 can't make a run deeper into the postseason than they did last year.

Speaker 6 They're talking about the Astros being the division favorite. That's fine.
That's fine. The A's have got a guy coming off hip surgery who's just a platinum player.
That's all. That's Matt Chapman.

Speaker 6 Matt Olson very well could lead the league. in home runs.
Baseball. Fuck the league.
Baseball.

Speaker 6 He very well could lead baseball in home runs and they've got a sneaky rotation right now i mean all they've got is a top prospect in aj puck ready to step in and put people the shoes of a guy named mike fires who's done nothing but deal at home for the oakland a's so if they can figure out a way to roll mike fires out at home and have him compete at home then aj puck whatever he's at come on guys let's be real let's be real i don't know if there's gonna be real this is stupid i don't know if there's gonna be a boost on the barsdale sports book or not maybe stay tuned maybe i'm just saying just saying.

Speaker 1 Okay. I do like that we have you as our analyst, and you'll come on here every time and just unabashedly be like the Oakland A's have a real shot at winning it all.
I like that.

Speaker 1 I like everybody that has like, you've got a great gig going out there in Oakland, but like, never throw away that homerism. You should be a homer for life and don't apologize for it either.

Speaker 6 I don't, you know, what, PFT? I had the greatest homer of all time tell me that he loved what I did. Hawk Harrelson.

Speaker 1 Oh, I think you're gonna say Jared Karabas.

Speaker 6 No, Hawk, the greatest homer to ever step into a booth. Hawk Harrelson.

Speaker 1 He truly is. Hawk would

Speaker 1 just

Speaker 1 root for the White Sox so hard that it wasn't even close to unbiased, which I actually love. I love that about baseball.
I think that when you watch

Speaker 1 the national game on Wednesday or Sunday, you kind of lose a little bit of that.

Speaker 1 When you watch the playoffs, you lose a little bit of that, where it's the guys who know your team and who are announcing your team all year, and that's your fucking stuff.

Speaker 6 Don't sleep on the twins either, P.F.T., don't sleep on the Twins. Never do.

Speaker 1 Yeah. The Twankies.

Speaker 6 Those more, I mean, Nelson Cruz is, I believe, 1,012 years old and still hitting 5,000-foot home run. Like, just

Speaker 1 don't sleep.

Speaker 1 I will not sleep on the Twins. What about the Brewers? What about our Milwaukee Brewers with Christian Yellich?

Speaker 1 Just please tell us that Christian Yellich is not going to win the home run derby this year.

Speaker 1 Ooh.

Speaker 6 Who's hungry?

Speaker 1 Who's hungry?

Speaker 1 No.

Speaker 6 I don't know if you guys know this, but there's a conversation in baseball about Christian Yelich having to compete in the home run derby each and every year.

Speaker 6 And I don't even, I don't know, I don't know what it's about.

Speaker 6 I'm not sure, but that's, that's just something that, like, if Christian Yelich wakes up that day and his heart is still beating, they will roll him out to the batters box just so he, he's like a, it's like a master's thing.

Speaker 6 Like, you win the jacket, you're grandfathered in, you get this thing. You can play here for life if you want.
It's kind of like that's how Yelly has the derby on lock now.

Speaker 6 Just be, I don't know what it is. I don't know what happened.

Speaker 1 We've already figured it out, though. If he ends up winning a home run derby, then I'm just going to shave a little piece of PFT's ass, shave a little piece of my ass.

Speaker 1 We're going to make a chili and we'll eat it. We will literally eat ass.

Speaker 1 We'll be cannibals. Not the hair.

Speaker 1 Yeah, no, no. Actual skin.
Just take a little razor and just like. I feel like

Speaker 1 you're seeing good fellas the way that I'm doing. I have like the garlic in prison.
I'm not going to do that to my butthole. Being a cannibal is not a problem for me.
It's the shout out army hammer.

Speaker 1 It's the actual eating of

Speaker 1 each other's asshole that would be a problem.

Speaker 6 There should be no problem in there.

Speaker 6 I'm sure there's a little excess in there. You just nick a little off your balloon knot.
You'll be just fine. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Jesus Christ. Yeah.

Speaker 1 When you put it that way, way it sounds a little less appetizing um dallas uh i my last question about this baseball season so they've kept a couple of the weird rules i don't know how i feel about this so they got they no universal dh but they have kept man on second to start extra innings and this i love the seven inning double headers what what do you think about the man on second extra innings i hate that I think it's it's like almost like rec league softball.

Speaker 6 It's tough to swallow early on, no doubt.

Speaker 6 I think if you're looking at it more from a like, it depends on which way we're looking at it.

Speaker 6 Competition standpoint, you understand what goes into building a nine-inning game as a player, competing, guys in the bullpen stepping up, helping each other out, the starter stepping up and maybe carrying and

Speaker 6 doing an entire day's work, giving the bullpin a rest.

Speaker 6 That matters.

Speaker 6 And guys know how much that matters over the course of a long season to have those days get picked up by either the pin or the starter, or a guy goes off, hits three tanks, and just carries the offensive load.

Speaker 6 So that's, that's great. But then

Speaker 6 when you get into those late innings, some like at the big league level, what happens is guys get sent down after they've pitched three innings in relief, four innings in relief, right?

Speaker 6 They now get sent down. And you may never see that dude again, all because he pitched well in relief and ate up those innings.

Speaker 6 And now, because you can't use him for the next three, four days, he goes down. And now, who knows what happens? Maybe the next time he goes out in 3A, he gets banged up.
God forbid something twinges.

Speaker 6 He doesn't feel right because he just went four in the big leagues, got sent down because they had to play 16 innings.

Speaker 6 They didn't have a chance to win this thing in the 10th, 11th, 12th, so on, so forth. So I can understand the business side trying to protect resources.

Speaker 6 I can also understand the player side, the competitive side, where, yo, we just built this nine-inning ball game, this nine-inning theater, and we're not about to just watch some slap dick come in here and take second and

Speaker 6 blow it because he wasn't ready.

Speaker 1 Like, no, that's bullshit. Right.

Speaker 6 So I can see it from both ways. But I want, look, man, we're trying to speed up a game that doesn't have a clock, which

Speaker 1 true, true. I love the seven-inning doubleheaders.
I think that's great.

Speaker 1 There should be more doubleheaders. There should be doubleheader day.
Give guys more, more, you know, give teams more off days. Sundays.

Speaker 6 That's how they used to roll, man.

Speaker 1 Sundays, or even just have it in the middle of the week because I love day baseball in the middle of the week. That would be beautiful.
So they should do that.

Speaker 6 Well, you're a Cubs fan and you're abused like you're it's in your DNA to not know what it's like to be able to play baseball at night for a certain amount.

Speaker 1 Day baseball is the best. Friday afternoon is great.
Friday afternoon at Wrigley is the greatest like thing in the world.

Speaker 6 It's phenomenal. I agree with you.
I agree with you, man. The A's played the second most day games behind the Cubs.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Love it.
Love it.

Speaker 1 Give me your top three for MVP and then also top three for Cy Young.

Speaker 6 Oh, man.

Speaker 6 Like Ale, I think you got to talk about, like, yeah, you got to talk about Mike Trout. I know it's like, ah, how far down on the list is he going to go?

Speaker 6 There's no reason that he can't still be

Speaker 6 a guy. I know Alex Bregman's a name that's been thrown around.

Speaker 6 National League, why not not Milky Betts? Why not another guy on his team, Cody Bellinger? Why not a guy like Ronald DaCunha Jr.?

Speaker 6 That's who that's that's that's somebody that I'm paying attention to, Ronald Decuna Jr.

Speaker 1 I like he's awesome, I like him a lot.

Speaker 6 Uh, Cy Young, American League, again, Garrett Cole. That's a great place to start.
I know Tyler Glasnow's name's been kicked around.

Speaker 6 I think there's a lot of growth that would have to occur for him to be a serious consideration.

Speaker 6 Uh, then you got to go with guys who I think are like stalwarts in that area, which are Giolito, Bieber, M.B. Beebs.

Speaker 6 I mean, the dude who basically had the Cy Young locked up after his first start last year, just undressing people.

Speaker 6 Email,

Speaker 6 why not Walker Mueller? How are you boy? I think that dude is going to light some shit up this year, if I'm being frank.

Speaker 1 And maybe Trevor Bauer.

Speaker 6 Well, I mean,

Speaker 6 that's a dude that we're excited to see how that kind of pans out over a full season, right?

Speaker 1 And you Darvish,

Speaker 1 who I think should have won the Sion last year for the Cubs, now on the Padres in

Speaker 1 a park that he should be killing it in. So he's another guy.

Speaker 6 Well, him and Snow, right? Both those dudes. Yeah.

Speaker 6 It's interesting, too, because guys like that or situations like that, you wonder if there's a chance that those votes get taken from each other or if they compete so well that they start to cancel each other out, which you hate to see, but you love to see what that body of work looks like if you're a baseball fan.

Speaker 6 At the end of awards season, it might kind of break your heart because you're like, well, shit, I wanted that guy.

Speaker 1 So

Speaker 1 how does the fans returning impact the game? Because I think a lot of stadiums are going like 5,000. Some are going 25%.
Some are going 50%.

Speaker 1 In a stadium like, I think probably the Rangers are one of the most, right? They're 50% capacity right now. Yeah, Texas.

Speaker 6 I believe the Rangers are actually offering a fan experience where if you pay triple your price of season tickets, they'll let you play in the hip pocket of the player.

Speaker 1 Like you can be

Speaker 1 right there. Who does that favor more? Does that favor the offense or the defense?

Speaker 6 I'll say this, dude. It absolutely favors the home team because in baseball, there's ebbs and flows, just like in football.
You know, if your boy's got the rock, it's about getting behind him.

Speaker 6 And that energy is a little different than it is if it's a goal line standard. If you're in the red zone trying to make a stop, you know, those noises change.
Same for baseball.

Speaker 6 And this is the like what you're going to see now, like the

Speaker 6 Astros tour that happened last year. Yeah.
It's going to be different this year, man. It's going to be different this year because I don't care that it's 5,000, 10,000 fans, whatever.

Speaker 6 They're going to hear it and they didn't hear it last year. And I hate to even bring that up or for it to be a thing, but that's what we talk about is the fan experience.
How does that change?

Speaker 6 And it's odd that my DMs are still to this day flooded and getting more so in spring training about people that are like, yo, I just can't wait to come to these Astros games.

Speaker 6 I can't wait for this Astros.

Speaker 1 You got all the hook last year. Yeah, you got to remind people.
Thank you for bringing that up.

Speaker 1 We need to do a better job as a podcast, and I think just as journalists in general in this conversation, of reminding people that the Astros did not get their tour last year.

Speaker 1 And if you go to attend an Astros game, it would be important to remind the players of the integrity of the game that we love, the game that we're custodians of, that we're charged with taking care of and ensuring the safety of for future generations.

Speaker 1 It would be important to remind players about the integrity that's necessary to play that game.

Speaker 6 As a keeper of the game, PFT, it is your duty, my man. It is your duty.
It is our duty.

Speaker 1 Give us a final question. Give us a, oh, actually, the ROBAC question.
Use code AWL on roback.com for 20% off your first purchase. R-H-O-B-A-C-K.com.

Speaker 1 And for you, Dallas, we have a ROBAC performance Q-zip that we will send to you. So we'll make sure that gets you.
Rowback.com. Use code AWL.

Speaker 1 All right, give us your World Series and your champion, and you can't use the A's.

Speaker 6 Oh, man.

Speaker 6 Can't use the A's?

Speaker 1 Can't use the A's. Can't use the A's, but we'll say the A's are going to win the World Series.
There, that's said. Now, give us the what would happen if the A's didn't win the World Series.

Speaker 1 Who would be in it and who would win it?

Speaker 6 I think it's going to be the Dodgers again.

Speaker 6 And,

Speaker 6 i mean oh man i don't know if i'm ready see we're doing our predictions we're doing our predictions in a day and a half so this is subject to change i can't be held completely to this right now but i believe the dodgers are going to be there i believe the white socks are a team oh that is is being strongly considered i just i

Speaker 6 i feel like if they can handle business in their division

Speaker 6 I like, man, I just like how they're built.

Speaker 1 All right, can you give me one tasty future? Just like on the outside looking in.

Speaker 1 Ooh. If everything goes right for this team, you could see them making a run.

Speaker 6 Oh, I mean, like, you would have to, like, I don't know how. Ooh, ooh.

Speaker 1 Just tasty. I mean, I think that would be the Padres.
Yeah. Yeah, and they're fun to root for.
Yes.

Speaker 6 Yes. Yeah,

Speaker 6 I think that's a tasty future right there because they got to compete against those boys in blue, and they got to get past Atlanta if that's going to be a thing.

Speaker 6 And Atlanta was going to be the other tasty, but I feel like San Diego, they're like Slam Diego, was a a little tastier.

Speaker 1 I just like saying San Diego is cool.

Speaker 1 All right, Dallas, thank you. Everyone go subscribe to Starting 9.
It is a fantastic baseball podcast. Baseball season is back.
You'll see Dallas and hear from him all the time. Thank you, Dallas.

Speaker 1 And congrats again on that no-hitter, dude.

Speaker 6 Appreciate you guys.

Speaker 6 I don't know what that is. Thank you.
Thank you. If you need something signed, I can get that to you, but I'm not a big no-hitter.
I don't collect those. Those are

Speaker 1 with you. Yeah.
Yeah, right. Yeah, right.
Beat it.

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Speaker 1 Okay, let's wrap up. We got some FAQs to send you on your way.

Speaker 1 Late night show.

Speaker 1 Hank.

Speaker 1 Billy.

Speaker 1 All right, we got some good ones today. Okay.

Speaker 1 Oh, okay. I mean, that's.

Speaker 1 They're always good ones. We got some great ones.
They're our special people.

Speaker 1 Yeah, we do.

Speaker 3 Hi, my name is Joey, and my question is: if Billy and Big Cat

Speaker 3 and PFT and Billy had a kid, whose kid would beat the other kid up?

Speaker 1 Wow. That's a good question.

Speaker 1 I don't. If we're going off of.
well, we would because it's Billy's kid, so we would be going off of Billy's measure for beating up.

Speaker 1 Billy and my kid would be taller than Billy and PFT. You don't know that.
I might be a late bloomer, big cat. I would say that's almost guaranteed.

Speaker 1 So, Billy, according to your rules, the taller the person,

Speaker 1 the guaranteed.

Speaker 1 You see, PFT has fast Twitch muscles. I do.
I'm very fast Twitch. Billy, I noticed something, by the way.
I noticed that you haven't called out Francis Nanganyu yet.

Speaker 1 Dude, Dude, come on. What? That's a death sentence.
So are you? For him? Your hands are.

Speaker 1 No, no, my hands are legal, but they're not that good yet.

Speaker 1 Wait, wait, wait. Your hands are legal? I thought they were...

Speaker 1 That guy is... You're walking it back now, but he's a monster.
So you're not calling him out? No, not at all. So you think that...
He's strictly not fighting actual fighters.

Speaker 1 I know I'm not a real fighter fighter. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Speaker 1 So you definitely wouldn't call him out. No, 100%.
So what you said to me yesterday when you're like, I think he's kind of a pussy. No, I never said that.
That guy

Speaker 1 in a sandmine.

Speaker 1 If Dave paid enough money, I would fight him. No.
Okay. All right, cool.
All right. So I just wanted to make sure the record was straight.

Speaker 3 Hey, Bug Cat and PFT Caterpillar. When's the last time you guys were stung by a bee slash wasp slash hornet slash mosquito? Also, can I get a power ranking on those four?

Speaker 1 Big come up for the mosquito being lumped in there with the bee and the hornet. Yeah, not even close.
A single hornet, like, actually, you know what? A mosquito is the most deadly animal on earth.

Speaker 1 Well, no, diarrhea. Triple E.
But they get, where do they get the diarrhea from? No, that's malaria. They get, yeah, malaria causes diarrhea.
Oh, it is.

Speaker 3 Malaria was like the original COVID.

Speaker 1 The

Speaker 3 stop and sports.

Speaker 1 What was?

Speaker 3 We used to not be able to practice sports because of triple E.

Speaker 1 What's Triple E?

Speaker 1 Mosquito? Oh, that's a mass thing. Yeah.
Yeah. What does Triple E mean? No, there was like...

Speaker 3 It's like a mosquito virus.

Speaker 1 West Nile?

Speaker 1 No, it was a thing in mass.

Speaker 1 At church? If there was enough reported triple EEE. Like Triple E.

Speaker 3 We couldn't practice outside after like four o'clock.

Speaker 1 Yeah, if there was enough reported cases, it was like dear to humans.

Speaker 5 Eastern equine

Speaker 5 encephalitis.

Speaker 1 Encephaliditis.

Speaker 1 So

Speaker 1 it's been a long time since I've been stung by a bee or a hornet. Yeah, so I think it's been probably like 15 years.
I tend to avoid things that have stingers.

Speaker 1 That's just a good rule of thumb in life. I would go mosquito number one because, as we mentioned, they do kill.
They're like mass murderers.

Speaker 1 It's a slaughter out here. I go mosquito one, hornet two,

Speaker 1 bee three.

Speaker 1 I'm currently dealing with a big ant problem because my son is just a crumb factory. So I'm dealing with...
I haven't been around a hornet or a bee in a long time, but

Speaker 1 no. They're little pussy ants.
I kill them with my hands. Not to say I'm like strong and tough, but like I've killed probably 300 ants this week with my fingers.
You should

Speaker 3 take them, rescue them, get a little ant farm.

Speaker 1 No, the problem is

Speaker 3 how smart ants really are.

Speaker 1 22 because my son causes the crumbs for the ants, but also I can't get like the real ant traps because he would try to eat it, and that would be a problem as well.

Speaker 1 We should send just a bunch of cookies and things that are crumbly to Bryson DeShambeau.

Speaker 1 Yeah, ants everywhere.

Speaker 1 We'll

Speaker 3 piggyback off that. This question is for Dad Cat.
Dad to Dad, what's your favorite episode of Bluey? Mine is the one where they go camping and she meets Jean-Luc.

Speaker 1 I like camping. I like the Robot Dad.
Robot Dad's an awesome episode. You guys should actually watch Bluey just to watch it.
It's actually that good.

Speaker 1 Is it one of those shows where if you got really high and turned it on, like as an adult, you would enjoy it?

Speaker 1 Yeah, I think I'm saying you don't have to get high to enjoy it. I'm saying

Speaker 1 you're going to get a drug guy mode for a second. Say, just enjoy something for fun.
Have fun with something. I don't don't know.
Enjoy life.

Speaker 1 Serious? Yeah.

Speaker 3 All right, well, this kind of piggybacks off of that.

Speaker 3 When can we expect review season to start a la King of Kong, Fistful of Quarters, and Garbage Picking, Field Goal Kicker?

Speaker 1 That typically starts

Speaker 1 right after March Madness, right? No, it starts right after all sports shut down and there's a pandemic because that's the only time we've done it. For real.

Speaker 1 So, yeah, whenever the next pandemic happens, we will start that. No, remember, we did it over the summer with with Rascilla that one time.

Speaker 1 What did we review?

Speaker 1 It was Firefest, yeah. Yeah, that's right.
Firefest. Okay, so yeah,

Speaker 1 if there are certain phenomenons, then we'll probably review it. But yeah, it's not.

Speaker 1 That was a pandemic thing.

Speaker 1 At least the garbage kicker was definitely a pandemic thing. It was, for sure, yeah.
It was King of Commons. I would use King of Congress.

Speaker 1 I would review the Netflix documentary about the admission scandal. I just started.

Speaker 3 I just started the F1 documentary. Everyone says that's good.

Speaker 1 Oh, are we going to become F1 guys?

Speaker 1 A lot of hubbub going around.

Speaker 3 I fell asleep halfway through the first one.

Speaker 1 Always a good sign.

Speaker 1 That's great. That's like me and

Speaker 1 that biking, the steroid biking one. What's it called? Icarus? Yes.
I snoozed through that. I thought it was fascinating.

Speaker 3 Yeah, I know. That won awards.

Speaker 1 I'm going to go now. Dude, I slept.
Yeah. Anything else?

Speaker 3 Everyone says F1's so good.

Speaker 3 I'm going to see it through, but yeah.

Speaker 1 You know what? Honestly, if we just talked about F1 on this podcast, we would seem so classy. Yeah, no, I'm down to get in on F1.
I read that whole blog that

Speaker 1 Logan posted. I was like, yeah, this actually might be interesting.
I don't actually want to get in on it. I just want to talk about it so that it seems like we're cool.
Maybe we're Mercedes-Adjacent.

Speaker 1 It's a this league league. Okay.
Like big-time drama. Like this league.
So that's why I want to get in on it. King Kunt Godzilla?

Speaker 1 What? To review? The movie that just came out? No. It's coming out one day.
Billy's trying to figure out ways to get us to buy him movies at home. Yeah, should we review the new Avengers? It's $20 HD.

Speaker 1 HD.

Speaker 1 Should we all do that as a project?

Speaker 3 Maybe we got to. We should do predictions.

Speaker 1 We should probably do predictions. We should probably do one Avengers, and then we should do an Avengers while also drinking Core's Light.
So we'll have to put that on the tab as well.

Speaker 3 We should do predictions. For what?

Speaker 1 For Godzilla, King Kong.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 1 The Godzilla. I'll go.
It's a chalky pick. I'll go King Kong.
Yeah, what are the odds? Give me the odds on it.

Speaker 3 Godzilla's got to be the heavy favorite.

Speaker 1 I feel like

Speaker 1 who won the last one? King Kong Kong could make him tap. King Kong won, but Godzilla just swam away.
So that's a wing for King Kong.

Speaker 1 Who won? Who won? King Kong. Who won the one before that? Well, it was just the one 1954.
Oh, that's the only one? Yeah, there's only one. Oh, they're going to do some lame-ass Ty then.
I say Ty.

Speaker 1 I'll take Ty in regulation. I like that.
Mothra is going to come in and just land on him and smother him.

Speaker 1 Cast 1,000.

Speaker 3 Do you honestly believe that PFT is done making oral jokes?

Speaker 1 No.

Speaker 1 I haven't, to my credit, I haven't made that many oral jokes. No, no.
I think I did like three of them. No.
Most of them switched. That's anyway.
Yeah, there you go.

Speaker 3 What is more important for the ideal male physique, mass or girth?

Speaker 1 Billy? This is a Billy question. We'll let you go with it.

Speaker 1 Lem. He's thinking about skill.
What? You don't believe that's a girth. Dude.
Mass or girth. Are you doing the whole, like, it's not the, it's, it's the motion of the ocean, not the size of the wave?

Speaker 1 Yeah. It's in the hips.
Okay. Yeah.
mass or girth. That shit is a lie that people

Speaker 1 that no, seriously, I don't know who started it, but that's a lie.

Speaker 3 Just like mass or girth, Billy.

Speaker 1 I want to go with mass,

Speaker 1 okay, triple E. All right,

Speaker 3 uh, what was everyone's first car?

Speaker 1 It was a 1993

Speaker 1 Cheviastro

Speaker 1 that I owned,

Speaker 1 I think it was it was a Dodge Caravan

Speaker 1 purple

Speaker 1 Terrible car and then I had the uh Avalon for a very long time that I loved very dearly I was running through my list of vans that I went through as a kid I honestly

Speaker 1 I legitimately drove six vans why is it is that drug guy move to drive a van

Speaker 1 I think it's a poor guy move what

Speaker 1 of course it's a drug guy move it's like the write that's heavy weight write a movie moving weight write a movie in the 70s through like 2000s and the drug guy moving is always in a van.

Speaker 1 I had a if this van is rocking, don't come a knocking for three years when I was a virgin. Nice, it was such a flex.

Speaker 1 Did it help or hurt?

Speaker 1 I just said I was a virgin for three years after I put that sign up. So, yeah, no, it definitely helped.

Speaker 1 Hand job king, though.

Speaker 3 Last one.

Speaker 1 Dear hand to the cat and TFTs. Listen, vote to myself.

Speaker 3 Can we expect more episodes like the life Life episode with Titus and Rosillo? The interview with Andrew Hawkins a couple months back had a similar vibe and reminded me of how compelling that can be.

Speaker 1 Sure. Yeah.
I mean, the problem is we discussed our entire lives in the last one. So I'm going to have to go back and maybe psychoanalyze Billy in the next one.
Actually, yeah, we should do a Billy.

Speaker 1 Billy's life. Billy, Jake, and Bubba's Life.
Yeah, and we could just give you guys, we could tell you guys how stupid or smart you are. Depending on the person.
You could grade your lives.

Speaker 1 Smart, stupid

Speaker 1 no one knows who i pointed to there i think they have a pretty good idea

Speaker 1 all right let's do let's do numbers

Speaker 1 is that it hang yeah 99 31 31 31 31 99 8 32 and there's 85 65

Speaker 1 31

Speaker 1 47

Speaker 1 andres karolenko oh yeah shout out, AK.

Speaker 5 47, January 17th and February 4th.

Speaker 1 I remember it well.

Speaker 3 Sister's birthday.

Speaker 1 Shout out. What's up? February 4th? January 17th.
How old is she?

Speaker 1 Love you guys. Love you guys.
Skeeters are the most dangerous animals in the world.

Speaker 1 king.

Speaker 1 Shy it away.

Speaker 1 No, I've been coming for your love of king. Take

Speaker 1 on

Speaker 1 me.

Speaker 1 Take

Speaker 1 me

Speaker 1 on.

Speaker 1 I'll be

Speaker 1 gone

Speaker 1 when I dream.

Speaker 1 Needless to say,

Speaker 1 I've already said it's funny. stoning away.

Speaker 1 Tell me, learn that the mind is okay.

Speaker 1 Say after me.

Speaker 1 Say after me,

Speaker 1 it's no better to be safe than sorry.

Speaker 1 Take

Speaker 1 on

Speaker 1 me,

Speaker 1 take

Speaker 1 me

Speaker 1 off.

Speaker 1 I'll be

Speaker 1 gone

Speaker 1 every day. or two.

Speaker 1 Have the things that you say

Speaker 1 aloud.

Speaker 1 Just to play my memories away.

Speaker 1 You're all the things I've come to remember.

Speaker 1 Be shiny away.

Speaker 1 I'll be coming here anyway.

Speaker 1 Be shiny away.

Speaker 1 Take

Speaker 1 on

Speaker 1 me.

Speaker 1 take

Speaker 1 me

Speaker 1 up.

Speaker 1 I'll be

Speaker 1 gone

Speaker 1 in a day.

Speaker 1 It's part and my take presented by Barstool Sports.