Leonard Fournette, Stafford To The Rams And Patrick Reed Is Hilarious

Hey, Pardon My Take listeners, you can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music.
On today's Pardon My Take, it is officially Super Bowl week. We have Playoff Lenny, Leonard Fournette on the show to kick off Super Bowl week, which is a weird Super Bowl week because we're not down in Tampa.
We'll do all of our Super Bowl storylines and prop bets on Wednesday and Friday, but we do have playoff Lenny today. We also have the big Stafford, Jared Goff picks trade, Patrick Reed cheating maybe again, who's back of the week, football guy of the week, and it is fight week.
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It's Part of My Take presented by Barstool Sports. Welcome to Part of My Take presented by Mugsy Jeans today.
Mugsy.com slash PMT. Go buy the new collab jeans that are the PMT Mugsy collab at Muggsy.com slash PMT.
Today is Monday, February 1st. It is Super Bowl week and it is fight week.
Are we ready? I'm not officially ready yet. I hope I will be by the end of this episode, but not having the Pro Bowl today, the pageantry, the presentation, the electric competition, that was the perfect way to ease me in to Super Bowl week.
And the Pro Bowl really was like the football equivalent of the Masters in terms of a great nap day. Like a wonderful nap Sunday was watching neither offense or defensive line really get out of the three-point stances at all.
And them not trying until the very last drive of the game. So I do miss the Pro Bowl.
It is a little weird. We're not in Tampa this year.
We will be in West Virginia on Friday night for Fight Week. So Fight Week is officially here.
Billy Football is back in studio. Billy Football versus Jose Canseco on Friday night.
We're going to talk about that after our interview with Playoff Lenny, which is a kickoff to Super Bowl week a participant in the Super Bowl but before we do all that let's talk about the big trade so Saturday night uh we get the big trade Matthew Stafford going to the LA Rams in exchange for a third round pick this year a first round pick next year a first round pick the year after and Jared Goff. Wow.
What was your knee jerk reaction?

My knee-jerk reaction was that Jared Goff needs to have a private meeting with Blake Griffin to figure out what to do in Detroit. Yes.
Blake needs to be the welcoming committee and be like, here's how you transition from being a Cali bro to being a Michigander. Yeah.
A Michigander? A Michigander. A Michigander.
Misgender. Yeah.
Misgender. And, like, tell them where all the great kneecap restaurants are.
Tell them, hey, this is going to be confusing, Jared. Now the sun is going to rise in the south and also set in the south.
That's going to be tough. But knee-jerk reaction, is that good for the Lions, I guess? Both? Good for the Rams? I mean, so this is...
Sean McVay hates draft picks. He just hates having first-round picks.
Seven years in a row they will go now without a first-round draft pick. And now I'm starting...
Sean McVay has now flipped how my brain works where I'm starting to look at myself and be like, wait, do first-round picks not matter? Because he doesn't seem to think they do. Now, they do matter in the fact that they don't have any more for – they'll go seven years without drafting in the first round, and people are like, oh, yeah, Sean McVay is saying, let's go win now, first-round picks don't matter.
It still matters for the Rams because guess what? They're running out of first-round picks that they can trade. So first-round picks still matter for the Rams because they are capital to go trade for players.
I do like, though, the idea that it's a little bit of a zag on everyone else in the league where it's like, hey, let's go get guys that are proven instead of drafting guys that who knows. Right.
And so Jalen Ramsey did it and Matthew Stafford, which I don't know. This is an all-in move.
The Rams' window feels like it's pretty small here, and they have to kind of win a Super Bowl in the next two years before the fact that they haven't had a first-round draft pick in seven years is going to catch up. Right, and it's also weird that we're saying, like, oh, this is the next zag in the NFL.
The Rams have had proven success not ever using a first-round pick. Well, it to a Super Bowl right barely right didn't win scored three points yeah but they haven't had it's not like this is like the new Patriots mode like it's not like there's a dynasty it's like oh you actually don't need first round picks I think you you typically do need first round picks but it does tell me that McVay absolutely hates like focusing his time developing one person or developing the entire team.
It's like, do you want to date a virgin or do you want to date a MILF, someone that's been around for a while, knows all the tricks of the trade. So the Rams, in Les Snead, it does feel...
Well, Billy loves MILF. Billy loves it.
Big MILF guy. Les Snead feels like he's going all in.
Like, if this doesn't work out, he'd probably be without a job. McVay will be fine either way.
But the Rams are in full-on win now. And before we get to the Lions, I think the Rams are probably better.
I've always thought Matt Stafford's pretty good. But it's weird for everyone to now have Matt Stafford as, like, a top five quarterback and be like, this was the missing piece for the Rams.
They'll be good, but I don't know how this – like, they're the odds-on favorite now to go to the Super Bowl from the NFC. Is that right? What's crazy is – They might be.
Is that if they're paying this much for Matt Stafford, how much is Deshaun Watson worth? Well, so – Because McVay, this is a situation where McVay, I don't think, ever wanted Deshaun Watson because he's like best bros with Matt Stafford. And so he was planning on offering whatever it took to get this done.
And I don't know if Deshaun Watson's going to get... It's tough to pay more for a quarterback than what the Rams just paid.
Well, it also... We should throw out there that part of this deal for the Rams is getting out of Jared Goff's money.
So that's part of the giving up two first-round picks. I had the same thought that, oh my God, what's Deshaun Watson worth? But then you have to remember that the Texans are fucking idiots.
So the Texans will probably get less. They'll find a way to get less.
They will actually use this against themselves instead of being the smart thing of like, here's floor for what a quarterback starting quarterback should be they'll be like hey how about two first rounds in a fourth round so judging off my my newfound uh expertise in the stock market they'll look at this as being like wow that's one less buyer right we could have so i guess the price is going down on the show right exactly we got to act a lot faster fewer first-round picks out there that we could possibly get for them. What is it? Chiefs,

Packers, and the Rams, Bucks.

So they went to Todd for second.

And it's hard. I mean,

they did it this year with

defense. Matt Stafford's going to be great for

Sean McVay, but I just... That seems

like a little bit of an overreaction. I think the Rams

will be good, but to be like, oh yeah, let's pencil him in

for the Super Bowl. Now, the other

thing... Do you think maybe Sean McVay just doesn't like working

on Thursdays, and that's why he always trades his

first-round picks? Because, I mean, if that's

Thank you. would be good but to be like oh yeah let's pencil him in for the super bowl now the other thing maybe sean mcveigh just doesn't like working on thursdays and that's why he always trades his first round picks because i mean if that's the case then i kind of agree with him yeah it's it's i mean i do think it is an interesting i'm always interested in whatever a team does something that's different than what everyone else is doing and that's essentially what they're doing it's like hey we don't need these first round picks we'll figure out other ways to build a team in theory as a lazy person i kind of respect it because it's like let somebody else develop the guy and then once you know if they're good or not then yeah that's actually probably worth more like giving up a higher pick in the future for someone that you know for a fact right is already good right because you're not taking the risk yeah i i as a lazy person i like it i'll I'll put it that way.
There's a lot of people, too, who are like, well, the Rams are trading two first-round picks, but they'll be late in the draft. I don't understand that logic.
The NFL is so, like, unless you have Patrick Mahomes or Tom Brady or Aaron Rodgers, like, the NFL is so up and down year-to-year. Health-wise, you won with your defense last year.
It's harder to sustain a really good defense and i'd say it is to sustain a really good offense with a great quarterback and look at the texans when the texans traded two picks two first round picks for laramie tunsel they were 11 and 5 10 and 6 and then they went 4 and 12 so they thought oh we'll trade these two first round picks they'll be ins. Oh, whoops.
Now it's the third pick in the draft. And that's when it like if the Rams pull this off and they're good for the next three years and good meaning like deep runs in the playoffs, then I think that they didn't give up too much.
But if if anything happens that can happen every year in the NFL, the fucking Eagles are picking six after being in the Super Bowl four years ago. If anything happens and this ends up being a top five pick, I think that was a disastrous move.
Yeah, I mean, health is such a big factor. You could have Patrick Mahomes and still go like four and 12 if he gets hurt early in the season.
Right. So you can't pencil him in for having a late 20s.
You can't just be like, oh, this is what it is. It's fine.
I mean, you know what? No, I disagree. Because my brain is stuck in the second.
It's easier to just say that. Just say, like, whatever is currently happening in the NFL will also be the case in three years.
Yeah. I have no problem just being lazy and saying that either.
It's weird to see that and then have the Cowboys picking 10th and the Niners who were in the Super Bowl last year picking 12th and be like, yeah, you know what? The Rams are definitely going to be picking 32nd. Well, the Rams also play in a very tough division.
Yes. Besides Cliff Kingsbury, it's probably the best coach division.
Yeah. You've got the coach of the best track record of success.
You've got, I mean. That's a big besides, by the way.
Besides, yeah. Besides Cliff.
Yeah. Who's just sitting in his American psycho room blowing lines all day.
Huge besides. Allegedly.
I am very much excited for getting some Matt Stafford, Clayton Kershaw content. Did you know they grew up together, played baseball together? That was very quick.
I want to see Matt Stafford get back. I want to see him invited to the Dodgers training camp just so we can get another team picture with the two of them and have them highlighted and always linked together.
They should just move in together. Yes.
All right, so the Lions' perspective from this. The Lions' perspective from this, it was a home run for them in the fact that they are trying to fully rebuild now instead of half rebuild, which the Lions have kind of been perpetually stuck in.
They now have draft capital to trade if they want to, or if they want, they can pick. They have four first-round picks in a two-year span.
I like this because Dan Campbell, if everything works out and they can actually draft well, which is a big if, that's a bigger if than Cliff Kingsbury saying if the Lions draft well, Dan Campbell has a chance to succeed here. And then we have the Lions, you know, biting kneecaps off, becoming a prophetic genius press conference, which would be the coolest thing ever.
If everyone looks back and says, oh, you know who we were wrong, like making fun of? Dan Campbell. That guy was right from day one.
That will be cool. Do you think Jared Goff has the personality to bite kneecaps off? I think he'll get it.
He's got to get it. You've got to develop it.
Step one, if I'm Jared, I think you really have to change the lookup.

Yes.

Because you do look Calibro.

We love Jared.

But if you're going to go to Detroit, you need to grow either a mustache, maybe just the goatee.

Grow the hair out a little bit.

Cut into a mullet.

I can see a little hair.

Yeah, get a flow. If he gets a flow going, then I can see him becoming a Detroit guy.

But right now, it's like you will look like a misplaced Ryan Gosling. Yeah, maybe a neck tattoo.
Hell yeah. That would be cool.
Get a truck. Jared, I can tell that Jared's secretly always been a I want to be a truck guy guy.
Yes. Now's your chance.
Get a truck. Yes, don't bring that Tesla.
So the Lions, though, I like this move for them. They're actually rebuilding.
And not only are they rebuilding, but they have a quarterback in Jared Goff who, yes, we are biased because we're friends with Jared Goff, but who can keep them in games, keep them relevant. It's not a total like, hey, we're going to throw out no one here and hope it goes well.
They won't be terrible right away, so you don't have to worry about, like, oh, the winning culture and i think it's a home run for the lions i think they did the right thing especially after the fact that matt stafford said you know like they played their hand they said matt stafford was going to get traded and they still were able to pull off a pretty damn good trade i did love the note that matt stafford said he would be cool with getting traded anywhere except the New England Patriots because Matt Patricia.

So that is a beautiful grudge that he's like, fuck that.

I do not want to be in the same room.

I don't think Matt Patricia, what is he, like a special assistant now?

He's an intern.

You go back, you have to restart your video game career once you go back to New England.

You lose all your stats.

What were you going to say, Hank?

I mean, I think in general, I think veterans, unless you're trying to win a championship, which clearly he doesn't care as much about, they don't like going, Chris Long said it the best. Like, it's fun.
It's fun to win, but it's not fun. Like, the culture isn't a culture that's like, I want to go there.
But I don't think that's, I don't, I think, I think he uses Matt Patricia as like a, I think it was Matt Patricia. Yeah, probably just 100%.
Literally, I think he would probably love to go play for Bill Belichick, but the fact that Matt Patricia is there is probably why he said that. But Matt Patricia is a defensive guy.
But he still has to be in the same room. I think he still hates him, yeah.
I guess. I think it's a combination of both, and he just used Patricia as an excuse.
But it's weird to have one team, and the one team is the guy who used to be your coach. Right, but also is the notoriously hardest team to play for.
I don't think it had as much to do with Bill Belichick as it did with the guy that he hates. I think Matt Stafford almost probably said, didn't say, like, I don't want to go to New England because of Bill Belichick.
And then the last second was like, you know what? Patricia's force is too strong. Yeah.
We do get a chance for an immediate revenge game next year, too, because the Rams play against the Lions.

Oh, nice.

That's going to be fun.

That will be great.

So, overall, yeah, I mean, it will be interesting what happens with Deshaun.

I do think that the Saints maybe now will go with Jameis, which will be great.

And then it was random to have this happen on a Saturday night. Be like, oh, here's a block.

Because you don't see trades like this very often in the NFL.

I think it's going to be – I think the football team is going to make a run. I also think your Bears are going to make a run.
That's a Sean. Yeah, I just don't know.
Dan Snyder does not give a fuck. Dan Snyder will be like, I'll give you every first-round pick that I'm allowed to give you by the laws of the league to try to get to Sean, who's a proven guy.
Now, it would be very funny if the Bears got Deshaun and then the football team settled for Mitch. And then what if Mitch got really good? He is going to get really good wherever he goes.
Wherever he goes. What is that? You see Deshaun Watson's Instagram story? No.
He's on some LLC finance bro shit. He put up an Instagram story.
Is he on the moon? It's the Wolf of Wall Street. It's a picture of the Wolf of Wall Street, Leo.
And it says, if you're 20 to 30 and your main circle isn't discussing opening businesses, investing, escaping the 95, fitness, and self-development, then it's time to find a new circle. Your network is your net worth.
Ooh, I like that. So he's on some real entrepreneurial shit right now.
I like that. Make the money.
The Doge of Wall Street. Which, by the way, still holding on to my Doge.
Had it since like August. I had this thought last Thursday night because it was up like 8,000%.
When do you know that you're on the moon? Because I want to hold until I'm on the moon, but it occurred to me that I don't know where the moon is. I think $1 is the moon.
Once you're floating. Yeah, $1 is the moon.
$1 is the moon? So we've got a long way to go until we get to the moon. Yeah, no, the moon is still small in the sky, if we're talking about Dogecoin.
But what if I fall short and I become a star? That could work, too. A star is pretty good, too.
Yeah, that would be cool. And, yeah, I also thought about selling, but I'm also addicted to the roller coaster.
Yeah. So when you sell, I could make a lot of money off of it, but then I'm done with the ride.
And that's the fun for me. And you have weak hands.
You don't want to have weak hands. You don't want to have weak hands.
You have silver hands. I'm down here.
I'm in the fucking mines. Paper hands.
Paper hands suck. Silver hands are where it's at.
I want kneecap hands.

Billy, how much Dogecoin are you?

Is it your entire net worth?

I didn't get into crypto.

Oh, okay.

All right.

Well, that was the one thing you didn't get into.

We can't.

Are you going to be able to beat Jose up with those hands?

My hands were full at that time.

Jose's got diamond hands.

He hasn't sold anything in his life.

Yeah, that's true.

All right.

Let's do...

Oh, Patrick Reed.

So the other story this weekend. Patrick Reed, America's favorite golf villain, is back.
I love this. I love Patrick Reed so much.
So he sort of... He didn't actually cheat.
He actually didn't cheat. He just bends the rules, and because he's Patrick Reed, everyone flipped out.
It's only cheating if you get caught. Right.
And he bent the rules. He is Patrick Reed.
But then afterwards, it was found out that he possibly has a burner. It's probably his wife because his wife seems like definitely a burner spouse.
She gives burner spouse energy off. But he tweeted something, and it was word for word what the burner account had just tweeted as well.
actually DM'd the Burner. I was like, what's up, Patrick? You want to come on the show? No response.
I actually respect, though, Patrick Reed. One, because he is good for golf, because every sport needs a villain.
If you're a golf fan and you're so angry at Patrick Reed that you want him out of golf, you have to question whether you're a golf fan. Because guys who get this type of reaction on a Saturday afternoon in January on a tournament, I don't even know what tournament they're playing, that's good for golf.
Oh, I love it. That's good for golf.
You're right. His wife is a burner spouse, 100%.
Although I think that this might have also been Patrick. I think she probably runs Patrick's phones for him.
I'm not talking his accounts, his social media presence. I think his wife just has two phones, one for herself, one for Patrick.
She texts for him. She talks on the phone for him.
She checks his emails. Everyone's conversing with just Patrick's wife.
They probably share a voicemail still in the year 2021. I like that the burner is still up.
I think that that makes it even funnier because what happens usually with these burner accounts is the person will immediately delete it, run, say it wasn't them. I hope that Patrick Reed's wife does a press conference.
I hope he wins his tournament today, does a press conference like, yeah, that's my burner. What the fuck are you going to do about it? Oh, he'll never do that.
No, his wife. Oh, his wife.
His wife is like, what are you going to do? No one else is going to defend Patrick. So what is it? Use golf facts? Use golf facts.
Use golf facts to defend this fact. I like that we've still got somebody out there that's committed to the facts in this case because, yeah, he didn't technically cheat.
He just pulled the, yeah, let me get a volunteer over here. You see, that's where my ball was embedded.
Correct. Off the first hop, which, yeah, the amount of spin that guy puts on it is Dr.
English. Yeah, it can bounce, and then it skies up in the air and comes down with a heat of like a thousand cannonballs.
And so, yeah, it was like a fried egg situation, I'm sure, underneath that four inches of grass that cushioned the blow for it. And he totally gaslit the guy.
He was like, hey, feel this lip he was like feel the lip and the guy was like uh yeah there's um there's there's a lip there yeah and then after the round patrick reed was like yeah then the volunteer came over and uh yeah he agreed the ball was clearly embedded right and the volunteers like i guess i said that it's awesome he's great for golf he's great for golf because he's such such a villain and you need somebody like that in every sport. So I'm happy.
You know what he should have done? He should have just stepped on the ball. If it's not embedded, just step on it really hard.
Wiggle your heel in a little bit. Keep walking around.
Act like you can't find it. Come back and then look at the ball.
Oh, guess what? It's embedded. My only problem with Patrick Reed is that he's not creative enough when it comes to cheating.
He cheats kind of like a doofus would. Yes.
You got to really, really bend the rules. He cheats knowing he's the guy who would just steal something, let's say a wallet, hypothetically, and everyone will know that he stole it and he's like, no, it wasn't me.
But we saw you do it yeah like no it wasn't me that's the type of cheating that he does and i'm patrick reed i hope he embraces it in the fact that like everyone thinks you're a cheater there's really nothing you can do to stop that at this point in your career just fucking embrace it like he did nothing actually illegal but he's patrick reed so he cheated. That's just how it works.
Patrick Reed, you cheat. That's the way.
I want him to start cutting out golf ball sized holes in his pocket and just dropping them down his pants leg into the bunk. I want him to ground the shit out of his club and then deny it.
I want him to kick a ball in. I want him to take out and uh like do a bank shot off of it and nail it i want patrick reed to be the biggest scumbag in the history of golf yes he mean he already is he just needs to embrace it or his wife needs to keep that fucking burner account and do not delete it and keep defending patrick and also patrick just hire your wife to be your caddy that would that would be so much better have you read people People really hate him so i went down a little mini rabbit hole the fact that he uh like won six straight mondays in q school where there's not a lot of fanfare and not a lot of like rules officials so everyone just pretty much just says that he cheated his way into the pga but then he got he won a master he won a master he won a Masters.
He's pretty damn good, but it's just very funny. Everything about Patrick Reed, people are just like, fuck this guy, fuck him forever.
He stole wallets, all this stuff, allegedly. Yeah.
In the words of Nick Faldo, welcome to the new age. Yeah.
To the new age. You can't...
There's nothing Patrick Reed can do that will make people like him at this point. So just go all the way.
It's so good for golf. If he just is a total dick and scumbag like openly and just says fuck you guys.
What are you going to do about it? Yeah. I'm Patrick Reid motherfuckers.
I would also like to see Blake punch him in the face. Yeah, I want to see a fist fight.
I want to see Patrick like at some point. I don't blame Patrick Reid anymore for cheating and getting away with it.
I blame everybody else on the tour for not doing anything to make him stop, like physically assaulting him. Yes.
Oh, yeah. There's definitely guys who wanted to punch him.
Here's a little snippet from Patrick Reed's alleged burner account, which is probably his wife's account. Someone was calling him a cheater and used golf facts, said, you're a hater and it sounds like that is all you will ever be.
Patrick Reed is not a cheater. He had one rules infraction in eight seasons on tour on both PGA and Euro Tour.
There are players with multiple rules infractions in one season, much less eight years. Take your hate somewhere else.
Now, there is a new trend that people make fake burner accounts for other people. And they're like, oh, we found this burner account.
It's usually never the case. The only reason I believe this is truly Patrick Reed's burner account, who would ever spend that much time trying to defend him? So if it was real, there's no one in the world who defends him, so it has to be Patrick Reed or his wife.
And no one is spending six months trying to frame patrick reed for something like this because they would just assume patrick reed probably has it himself well also if you're using actual golf facts as used golf facts does use golf facts that's tall that that actually would take way too much time for somebody that's trying to frame someone for a burner account right if i'm going to make a burner account for patrick reed i'm just i'm just going to be a big asshole right i'm just going to like say like pat you're you're a fucking hater patrick reed is handsome and not fat at all here's the new imagine dragon song yeah i would retweet imagine dragons constantly i would like imagine dragons um i would i would be very blatant i would this the subtlety of this account tells me that it is in fact fact. And it's been around for a while.
It is, in fact, a Patrick Reed or what's her name? Mrs. Reed.
Mrs. Reed.
Mrs. Reed.
Everyone knows Mrs. Reed.
Oh, Miss Justine. Miss Justine.
Miss Justine's Twitter account. I fucking love Patrick Reed, man.
When I say I love him, I hate him, but I love him that he exists because he does make sports so much more fun. Golf is in great hands right now.
Golf fans wanted there to be another Tiger. There's never going to be another Tiger.
Instead, we got fucking Bryson DeChambeau gaining 60 pounds and using his compass on the course. We got the coolest guy in the world, Brooks Koepka.
We got Patrick Reed cheating left and right and being a fat douche, which is very funny to me. Who else? Rory, everyone just picks Rory every single tournament.
He never does it. And Dustin Johnson falling downstairs for God knows what reason and winning Masters.
He slipped, big cat. He slipped sober.
Golf is great right now. Golf is in great hands.
I'm looking at pictures of Miss Justine right now. She's definitely killed someone.

Allegedly.

She's definitely killed.

I'm getting big time.

With her eyes.

She's into astrology.

I'm just going to make a bunch of snap judgments about her off these pictures.

None of these are facts.

No, they're used golf facts.

Yes, used golf facts.

I'm using golf facts.

Okay, she's killed someone.

She's into astrology.

Maybe not vaccination. She's never taken a vaccine in her life.
No, definitely not. That's into astrology.
Maybe not vaccination.

Never taken a vaccine in her life.

No, definitely not.

That's what I was going to say.

And let's see here.

She's posted on QAnon message boards.

Yeah.

Off the top of my head, all strong vibes from her.

Yeah, she definitely has a very strong let me talk to the manager vibe.

Yeah. Q School was something that really set her off.
Okay, let's get to who's back of the week, and then we'll have Playoff Lenny, Leonard Fournette, on the show. I used to think that sandwiches were just, you know, basic, until I realized how easy it is to level them way up.
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Who's back of the week? Hank. My who's back is Jizz.
Oh, you took mine. I had a feeling.
Damn. I had a feeling that was...
I have other ones if you want to pretend that never happened. No, go off on Jizz.
Jizz Horn Camp. Yeah.
Went off. It was trending.
I hopped on Twitter on Saturday, and it was just... Jizz was all over my timeline.
It was just a bukkake of tweets. And I was like, why? And it was like this guy in the Premier League scored four goals, and everyone was just, you know.
I think it was German. German, whatever.
I think jizz is German. I think any soccer league is whatever.
It's Premier. Yeah.
No, I agree. Good competition.
If he played in the EPL, they would make him change his name to something more proper. Series A.
Series A. Jesus Christ.
Series A. Like David Seaman.

Fuck, man.

His name wasn't David Jizz.

I don't know how this guy hasn't come up before, though.

I think that's one of those things where how does Jizz, how does that not, how do you

have that name?

How do you not change your name?

It's like the Seinfeld episode when she's dating the serial killer.

It's like, why don't you just change your name?

What company?

What company? What country is he from? Germany. So he's from Germany, so they probably don't use jizz the same way we do.
Exactly. So what do you mean? Why didn't you change your name? They don't even come in German anymore.
What do they call it? They just shit on each other. I guess not.
They empty their bowels. But yeah, Hank, you know there's different languages and different slang.
Yeah, but I feel like sex slang is all the same. It's universal.
Have you seen any like train porn from Europe no yeah where they just fuck on a train they don't do the same stuff oh oh oh oh you're thinking a different train no they're fucking oh I'm talking about like yeah that's like the second that's what PFT watches in uh in Germany there are two types of porn train porn is just one is where they train's going straight a lot there, PFT. No, one is where they crap on each other, and the other is just, like, two college kids that fuck on a train and no one ever catches them.
What's the slang that we have here that you could, like, if someone was named... I don't know.
It's just different languages. Scheisse.
They probably don't even think, like, oh, jizz is jizz. We think it's jizz.
English to German. Come is come.
Yeah, but what about jizz? I don't know. I bet you Germans don't.
They're not down with the jizz. They don't say jizz.
No. For sure not.
But we haven't heard of him because I don't think he's exploded. Like, jizz exploded on Saturday.
He had four goals in the second half. Sperma.
Sperma? Okay. So, like, if your name was Sperma, the German PMT would be laughing at you right now.
I feel like American kids would make fun of me too, though. Sperma? Yeah.
That actually sounds like a team in the third division in the Bundesliga. Series C? Yeah.
Series C. Yeah, we got Sperma.
Let's see. German versus Bukak.
Big game coming up on Saturday. Ten funny German sex words to pimp up your Deutscher dirty talk.
Here we go. I mean, Deutschland sounds like a dirty word anyway.
It does. Yeah, it does.
Definitely. I agree.
Lusperl. Nice.
Clitoris. Nice.
That's what that means. Morgan Latte.
That's Morningwood. So, yeah, there's some people.
Yeah. So when we say Latte.
That's also what Justine Reed orders at Starbucks. It's like I'm going to go.
My Morgan Latte with my big high boots. So when you say I'm going to drink a Latte over in Germany, they're like, oh, that guy's talking about drinking a boner.
That's funny. Yeah, that is.
All right, so Jizz is back.

Jizz is back.

Who do you have, PFT? Well, Jizz.

Jizz was going to be back big time for me.

All right, my Who's Back week is getting old,

so PFT and I had our birthdays this week.

Happy birthday, PFT.

Happy birthday, big guy.

Happy birthday, guys.

Thanks, Hank.

And I had my first kidney stone, so that was cool.

Yeah, Saturday morning.

What?

Squirted it out.

Just fucking squirted that shit out.

That was like, welcome to 36, you're old fuck. Do you feel older years it's gonna be you pft yeah yeah seven more years man i'm not looking for that so when you squirted it out yeah so i overdosed on you pretty much gave birth that's the male equivalent to having a child passing a child correct so i overdosed on vitamin c uh apparently taking like four to five tablets of airborne every single day for a week because we were traveling last week.
So I was trying to be extra conscious of my health. Yeah.
Not good. Not smart.
So Friday night, my dick started to burn. I was like, well, that sucks.
And then Saturday morning, just pissed out a little pebble. I feel like a man, though.
Did it make a sound when it hit the toilet? No, but I feel like a man. Don't you? I feel like I just need.
Did you scoop it up and hold on to it? No. I would have so much money.
I need some gout. Maybe a side of gout.
You could have sold that shit on eBay. You should have named it.
A necklace. Yeah, we should have bronzed it and hung it in the studio.
I was more freaked out than I pissed out a pebble. It hurt a lot.
Put it on a charm bracelet. Put it on a chain.
Shout out my kidney stone fam. I'm sure there's some people out there.
They know what's up. It fucking sucks, man.
What do you have there, Billy? I got some presents for you guys. Oh, okay.
Thanks, Billy. This is first for PFT.
Okay. Thanks, Billy.
What is it? Oh, it's a picture of Leroy that I already had in the studio. Thanks, Billy.
That's fine. And then what's mine? No, no, no, that's mine.
What's mine? And I got a piece of paper that probably says sorry for being annoying all the time. And then I also...
Is this an IOU? Billy gave me a... This certificate can be exchanged for one hug.
What does it say? One... Into the mic.
One def... What? Defending...
Billy. Of your honor.
Don't look at Big Cat when you're talking. Please talk into the mic.
Okay. One defense of your honor.
So that's going to be this Friday. It says defense.
He did not. That word is not defense.
That's disuse. And that's homer.
Yeah. Honor.
Disuse of homer. I have bad handwriting.
Very bad. Okay.
Thank you, Billy. I will be exchanging this on Friday against Jose.

Thanks for a picture of my dead dog.

Oh, you got those for all of us?

I had that commandeered for you.

Oh, nice.

Thanks, appreciate it.

Cool.

Billy, thank you.

Isn't there like 30 of those sent to you, PFT?

Yeah.

I have a lot of pictures of New Roads.

Oh, one was accidentally sent to you, so that you gave it to PFT.

Which I am appreciative of. For giving it to him.
For giving it to me. Yeah.
I'll put this next to you. All right, who's your who's back, Billy? The offseason.
What? We got to consult it. One, we're not in the offseason yet.
We're almost. Two, you're not in the offseason.
You got to fight on Friday. So your who's back is the offseason, which hasn't started.
Well, it's going to be back. It's going to be back next.
All right, Jake, what's your who's back? That would be a great who's back for seven days from now. His mind is so sharp right now for this fight.
The blue checkmarks. Rowan tweeted this out.
You can now get your house blue checkmarks. That's not real, though.
Damn. Yeah, somebody made that up as a satirical thing.

He applied and said that it was actually because he was in the X and me.

You're no longer an unfairified bad boy.

I looked into it.

No, he's not.

That's a great point, Jake.

It is a great point.

Very cool point.

Yeah, so you can apply for this if it was real.

I would never apply for something like that.

Yeah, just email gas again.

No, they forced me.

Yeah, right.

No, Twitter forced me to.

At the same time as everyone else in the office.

Someone's probably going to mail one of these plaques to my apartment.

They're going to send out a TaskRabbit guy to just put it above my door. I would like a blue checkmark.
What did you do? You just emailed Gaz, right? No, I didn't email anyone. You didn't email Gaz.
I'm about females, not females. You should give Jake yours, then.
Yeah, you should. Yeah, I'll give it to you.
Alright, how do I do that? I'll give it to you. Twitter, if you work at Twitter, reach out.
I'll give Jake my blue checkmark. Deal.
Okay, perfect. All right, let's get to our...
Imagine wanting to be verified. Happy birthday, both of you.
Thank you, Jake. All right, let's get to our interview.
We got Playoff Lenny on the show. He's family now.
You'll find out. He is family now.
Before we do that, we're going to Madrid are through to the quarterfinal. I get those goosebumps every time.
The UEFA Champions League quarterfinals stream every match live exclusively on Paramount+. All right, back to part of my take.
Okay, here he is, playoff Lenny Leonard Fournette, going to be in the Super Bowl this Sunday for the Tampa Bay Bucs. Okay, it is Super Bowl week, so we figured let's get a guy who's actually playing in the Super Bowl.
It is formerly known as Leonard Fournette, now Playoff Lenny. Great to have you on the show.
Congrats on the NFC Championship game. Big week coming up we start with playoff Lenny does anyone actually call you playoff Lenny nah nah so the funny thing my uncle who passed away when I was younger he used to call me Lenny right and I hated that shit I'm like I tell my mama like man please tell him stop calling me Lenny that ain't my name so I came to Tampa everybody started calling me Lenny I'm like, listen, please tell him stop calling me Lenny.
That ain't my name. So I came to Tampa.
Everybody started calling me Lenny. I'm like, listen, that's not my name, homie.
My name is Lenny. Like, get that right.
So I guess when the playoffs came, I don't know where it came from. This playoff Lenny came out of nowhere, so I just ran with it.
I think we know where it came from. So in the first week of the playoffs, wild card, you're playing against my Washington football team.
And I was watching on a live stream with our Bucs guy here. And he was just annoying the shit out of me.
Every single thing that he said was just making me mad because you guys were beating us. And he kept referring to you as Lenny.
And I was like, no one in the world calls him Lenny. I brought that up to Big Cat.
And he's like, yeah, that's playoff Lenny. Like we had playoff Damian last year.
Now you're playoff Lenny because you operate at a different speed. And then Big Cat started texting with Joe Buck.
Well, no, so Joe texted me. So we made fun of playoff Damian, the nickname last year, because Joe Buck dropped that in the Super Bowl.
We're like, dude, there's no way that anyone's calling him playoff Damian. And he showed us the notes when we had him on the show because we're friends with him.
So he was going through his notes before your game against the Saints, and he texted me. He's like, look, playoff Lenny, just so you know, if I drop it, like I'm not making this up.
And then he didn't say it during the game, and I texted him. I was like, can you please drop a playoff Lenny? And he finally did it.
a great nickname come on man I know you don't like the name Lenny but playoff Lenny that it's a different there's there's Leonard and then there's playoff Lenny it has a ring too you're right about that it was actually though like I don't think people I think people think it's a joke playoff Lenny's real playoff Lenny has seven touchdowns in six games playoff Lenny has 453 yards rushing 146 yards uh receiving in six games what is it like there's got to be something is there a switch that you flip where or like a phone booth you go into when you go from Leonard Frenette and you come out playoff Lenny uh I think uh you can say you know I know how important this postseason is for us. You know what I mean? And I know my role I play on the team.
Just like everybody's role is important. So, just playoff many times.
That's all. Yeah, is there such a thing as playoff speed? I always hear that it's like, you know, playoff games are played at a different level from like regular season NFL games.
I think so because I think I played matter of fact I tweeted a tweet in the beginning of the playoffs I said playoffs where ledgers are made you know what I mean so I've been in this situation before in Jacksonville where you can earn a great reputation in the playoffs so that's about it So it's interesting because when you were in Jacksonville, you were teammates with our good friend Blake Bortles. Well, I'd actually like to give you the floor because we have slandered you in the past on this show for saying that Blake had bad breath.
Would you like to take that back? Nah, Blake's my guy. He know what it is.
So does he have bad breath? No, listen, we're best friends with Blake Bortles. So whatever you say right now, like it's going to get back to him.
Yeah, you can tell me like, listen, listen. Everybody has their days, you know what I mean? You know, that's just what it is.
Listen, Blake is a stand-up guy. I'm not going to lie to you.
Blake was one of the, besides Jill and the rest of my guys, he's like top three, top four, one of my best teammates I've ever had or played with. I always thought that his breath smelled wonderful.
Are you saying that because you think Tom Brady has better breath? With different circumstances, I'm in a huddle with him. Why are you this close to his face? How do you know his breath smell good or not? I don't understand that.
We've hung out with him a ton. Yeah, we've been in the back of a bus with him.
We've stayed at his house. We slept at his house in Jacksonville.
So y'all started this corona shit. Actually, yeah, maybe.
I want you to apologize to Blake. He doesn't have bad breath.
Listen, Blake's my guy. I love Blake.
So, you know what I mean? It is what it is. You keep saying that and I don't believe it.
See, watch how easy it is. Blake's my guy.
I think he has beautiful breath. Blake's my guy and I love him.
Okay, fine. Fine.
Perfect. But it is interesting because you played on that Jaguars team that played against Tom Brady's Patriots in the playoffs.

You guys should have won that game.

Have you talked to Tom about that and been like, hey, you know that Miles Jack was not down, right?

Right.

I'm like, Tom, you're a fucking cheater.

You're a cheater.

He was like, man, y'all was so good. He's like, I don't know what happened.
I said, I know what happened. Y'all cheated us.
He was laughing his ass. Yeah, that was, I mean, you guys were close, but now you're in the Super Bowl.
The NFC Championship game, you did a move that I love. So you dropped the ball that he threw to you, and you looked at your hands like your hands had failed you.
Do you do that often? I think that's just a hilarious thing to do, to be like, that wasn't me, playoff Lenny, that was my hands. Like, what the fuck, what did they just do? Nah, I mean, like, don't get me wrong, I was pissed off about the situation, you know, dropping the ball.
You know what I mean? But, you know, you can't make up any excuses in an important game like that. You know, the sun was killing my eyes.
I had a shield on, and somehow, some way, the sunlight was directly in the shield. It had a glare on it, and I couldn't see the ball.
So I got on the sideline, was frustrated. You know, I got a couple words out, and I just moved on to the next split.
It is a good move, though though it's way better to look at your hands than it is to point up in the sky at the sun because then everyone's like oh that's an excuse but when you're looking at your hands it's totally different it's like something must have happened here right beyond my control it's like a tennis player looking at his racket after he misses a shot it's like that's the same racket dude like when i swing and miss on the tee when'm playing golf, and I look at my club afterwards, I'm like, whoa, that club should have hit the ball. That's not on me.
That's your fault. Yeah.
One thing I've noticed this postseason, I don't know if you've done it all the time in the past, but every LSU player is rocking the purple and gold shoulder pads underneath. And so it's like you and Devin White down there are both wearing them.
And I'm just wondering if you're going to have any hesitation to run over Tyran Matthew in the Super Bowl because you know he's probably got those pads on too. Yeah, I think we all – I don't know if we all have them.
I've been wearing mine since my rookie year. And he's a former Tiger.
He's from New Orleans. We both went to the same high school.
It's going to be a great matchup.

You know, he's

probably

one of the top two best

coming from LSU.

You know what I mean? For being a former Tiger.

And it's just

an honor to play against guys like that.

You know what I mean?

And also

who has great careers in college

and who continue to have great careers in the NFL. That's a good answer.
You prepped for media day. You did a good job of not giving any bulletin board material right there.
I don't know. Are you guys going to do media day? Is there going to be like a sit down where you sit on a Zoom for three hours and some guy in a barrel talks to you? Yeah, I think that'd be kind of different.
We do it Monday. I don't know how it is.
It's my first Super Bowl, so I'm excited. So speaking of LSU, another one of our guys, Coach O, you were on the team that Coach O took over for as interim head coach, and then he got the job the next year.
What was it like in the locker room when Coach O takes over head coaching duty and you guys killed Missouri? You were 2-2 and you killed Missouri that game. Was he just electric? What was it like when he gets in front of everyone for the first time? He's like, this is what we're going to do.
Because we have a theory that he's the greatest get everyone pumped coach there is. So when he first became our coach, he came in playing.
I think he was playing Bo boosie okay you know uh and he was getting the whole team hyped i mean it was something different for us too we wasn't really used to that and uh i think he's the one that taught us about fast i think he brought like the usc practice to lsu fast fridays perfect thursdays things like that and uh He's a great man. He told me when I was a senior and I wound up declaring to go to LSU, he said, I'm going to coach you one day.
Believe that. I'm like, man, he's crazy.
This one was at USC. I'm like, coach, you're never going to coach me.
And he wound up coaching my junior year, my last year at LSU. That's the crazy thing.
Wow. What was Tell the Truth Monday like? Did things sometimes get too real on Tell the Truth Monday? Yeah.
You know, you'll see guys missing tackles. You'll see guys missing blocks, making the wrong cuts.
You'll see guys falling all over the place. And, like, it's embarrassing, embarrassing you know i mean for some guys who consider themselves as type top tier players but it made you better you know you learn you learn from that you learn from that monday and you just moved on with it that one play that you had against auburn at lsu where you you basically just like carried people into the end zone threw one guy off of like the top of your head that's probably my favorite all-time run from a college football player.
When you got into the end zone, did you realize how cool that must have been? And how long did it take you to go back and watch the highlight? I didn't realize the run. Like, I didn't know he flipped it with my head until the replay.
And I was like, I was just shocked what I mean? I think – and that's one of my name kind of was out there. Everybody was tweeting about me.
It was just so much built up to that game too because the year before that, they whooped our asses. Like, they whooped us.
We was freshmen. Went up to Auburn.
I think they built us like 56-7. I guess one of their safeties, their defensive guys were still talking crazy.
You know, this is going to be LSU, number seven. We got seven guys who could stop him.
So a lot of things were built up into that game, and it wound up being a crazy game. Did you feel faster at Tiger Stadium with the numbers being every five instead of every 10

it looks faster just so you know as a fan watching on the couch it always looks like guys are running faster because they have every single five yards marked off i think i think it's just different when i see that i think you become older you know i mean and you're fresh in college i'm not gonna out to you. You're fresh.

You know, you come, you leave college, you come

to the NFL, you know what I mean? And you're fresh in college. I'm not going to lie to you.
You're fresh. You know, you leave college, you come to the NFL, you have a couple miles on you, you know what I mean? So it's all about managing your speed.
It's all about, you know, just staying in shape at the end of the day, to be honest. Yeah.
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And now more playoff Lenny. I've always felt that you could have been one guy that kind of proved the exception where you probably could have gone straight to the NFL out of high school.
Do you feel like, you know, when you first got to LSU, thinking back to how you felt then, how fast you were, how big you were, do you think that you could have gone to the NFL and been like an impact running back? No, man. It was different.
Like, I think it was different for me coming from high school to college. You know, in college, I mean, high school, you don't have to block guys.
You don't have to know what the mic or the sound was and they're all all this crazy stuff it was different for me going to college you know you had to worry about the mic the sound from the free safety to the nickel all these guys you got a block and i was used to that so i'm glad uh college helped me out a lot about protections and understanding schemes things like that then when i got to nfl it was kind of easier for me to translate over. So we linked up on a shirt together, Playoff Lenny.
You can go buy it in the Barstool Sports store. And now that we've had you have you on and I, you know, you're a recurring guest now.
I feel like I can say this. I did try to get something going about two months ago.
I'm a Bears fan where i wanted people to start talking about leonard

furnette as the biggest bust from that draft not mitch trubisky but but i wasn't talking about playoff lenny that's that's a different guy playoff lenny's the steal of that draft yeah yeah okay that's all you got all right yeah that's fair no that's totally yeah I can tell you about that draft

it was crazy

I didn't know who

Trubisky was like he just skipped he skipped all of us and i'm looking at my agent fuck i'm like i'm like damn i'm like i'm like then he said it was like he played one yeah they played one year and he and i guess he's just nice. You know what I mean? Just the one year.
He's a great guy. I mean, I hope I ain't the bust of the class.
No, you're not playoff. Playoff Lenny proved that wrong.
Solomon Thomas. Solomon Thomas is the bust of that track.
There's no such thing as playoff Mitch. That doesn't Well, he's been there twice.
Yeah. He's tried.
Since you're playing in the SEC, I always have the thought that, like, if you're in the SEC, you don't spend any time recognizing anybody outside your conference. You're just always focused on, like, oh, if you don't play in the SEC, then you're probably not very good.
Is that kind of the mindset that you guys have? Kind of, but, like, it's who stood out to me. I'm talking about like Delvin, right? Yeah.
And then Christian. Listen, I'm like, you know, look, everybody, like, you know, I took a sports class just comparing me and Christian.
I'm like, I never seen Christian play a day in my life, right? So I seen him play on the Rose Bowl. I said, you know what?

He's nice. He's nice, nice.

I thought it was hyping him up,

but he has catch, he's fast,

he can block.

He does it all.

Yeah. Well, also you got whooped by the Wisconsin

Badgers at Lambeau Field. We should probably throw

that out there. Bard Houston, no big deal.

Hold up.

If y'all say anything, I was hurt.

I had a high low angle sprain. I play and i still 120 yards in a loss wait high low you had a high low ankle sprain which one was it it was both i had both of them no big deal um yeah how long have you had the beard now uh i don't know so i was ninth grade okay it wasn't it wasn't as thick but as strong though Okay, so this might seem like a weird question But I always wonder this like James Harden the same way You've had it for so long Are you worried that when you shave You're going to be like, ugh, I'm ugly Like, it's been there forever I can tell you this story, right? I shaved my beard, I think my, my rookie year in Jacksonville and my daughter didn't much recognize.
She was crying. I say, nah, I said, I'm never, I said, I'm never, never cutting this again.
It makes me look so much, it's so much younger. I was like, I was 18.
I looked 18 at the time. I say, nah, this is not the look for me.
Cause I had it for so long. I've been having a bald head since my freshman high school.
you know what i mean yeah i've been a long time it's a playoff it's a good look it's a good look i just always like if you have it for so long like james harden he's someday gonna shave and he's gonna be like whoa this guy whoa that's weird like you don't even know yourself right definitely yeah um we're i guess you could say that we're friends with bruce arians we we He went to his house in Georgia at one time. Enjoyed a cocktail with him.
I've noticed that his face has gotten progressively redder as the winter has gone along. Are you ever concerned, like, looking over to him? Like, hey, dude, your face, you look like the Kool-Aid man now.
Like, is it just getting redder and redder? And how does he manage to stay so tan in the wintertime i think that's i think that's his face get red because he's cool he goes to bat for us with the refs you know some calls he feel like they're not the best calls and he just give him an effort that's just who he is man and uh i respect it and i understand it as a coach yeah um so this season for the bucks you guys actually weren't like i mean weren't – people weren't looking at you midseason being like this is a Super Bowl team.

You had some struggles.

You started like 6-4.

Was there a game or moment during the season in the second half

where you're like, okay, this – like we got something here.

This offense is now starting to click.

We're going to be good.

Like don't worry about it.

Our record doesn't really matter at this point. We're going to be good.

I always know we had talent. You know what I mean?

And this may speak

for me. I haven't in the

regular season. I didn't play as much.

This from me sitting back

and watching. I'm like, man, we have a lot

of great players and we just got to put the

pieces together. So I think towards the end

we played against Detroit. Everything was just downhill, uphill from that you know what i mean uh i think brady was more comfortable with the offense he was comfortable with the guys around him because we still we still was fresh we still was we still was understanding trying to get to know each other's weaknesses what we don't like what we like you know things like that and uh i think from that game and on was coming together, gelling together.
Yeah. Is there something new that you've had to do with Tom Brady to earn his trust? Or did, like, right off the bat, was he like, you're going to be my guy? I mean, trust, I mean, it's, it's, it's, you can't earn nobody's trust by just saying you're my guy.
But I think my playing, when I was just protecting him in the pass game and things like that, I think he feels a lot comfortable with me back there with him when it comes to the pass game or blocking for him, you know what I mean? Because no quarterback wants to get hit every single play. You know, just like, just not me, but the offensive linemen or the guys like Mike who's making those big-time catches, and he's making those big-time throws.
So I think he trusts all of us to be out there with him. What does he smell like? What does Tom Brady smell like? I don't know.
I never smell him. That's a weird question right there.
Better or worse than Blake Bortles is what I'm getting at. That's different.
That's different. I don't smell him at all.
Does he have good breath? Does he? I don't know. Write me tomorrow on Instagram or Twitter and I'll let you know.
Okay. Yeah, yeah.
Please. So I've been very impressed.
We've talked about it a bunch. The Bucs defense has played great this playoff run.
They also just are like physical and fast to the ball and hit hard. Who's the hardest hitting guy on that defense? Or the guy who maybe during practice when you're not going full speed or full hits, you know that he would have gotten you a couple times and he lets you know like, ooh, you're lucky that we're not going full speed here.
Devin White. Yeah? Listen, I've been knowing Devin White since he was 17.
Listen, he is country strong.

He's always been that type of strong since I first met him.

So when you see him just tackling ground man with one hand, one arm,

pulling him down, it's crazy.

Yeah.

Country strong is the best compliment ever.

It's horse strength.

He's a big horse guy, right?

Yes.

And he got horse strength. You're right about that.
Yeah. Have's a big horse guy, right? And he's got horse strength.

You're right about that.

Yeah.

Have you ever gone horseback riding?

No, that's not my thing.

Yeah, mine either.

Anything that's bigger than me I'm afraid of, naturally.

So I'm constantly terrified.

Yeah.

All right, well, we're not going to ask you for a prediction.

I guess we'll just say the prediction is playoff Lenny's going to show up

because it is the playoff. Super Bowl, Lenny.
We're excited to watch you. Sorry for the things we said.
Mostly me. I was just trying to spin it.
Yeah, you've said something. Yeah, I've slandered before.
Yeah, that's okay, though. You came at Blake, and we defend Blake more than we defend anything on earth.
But it's all good now.

Everyone go buy a Playoff Lenny shirt.

Good luck in the Super Bowl, man. This has been a lot

of fun. Yes, sir.
Appreciate you guys for having me,

man. So now we're family now.

Yes. Now we have your back.

We will defend Playoff Lenny

to the ends of the earth

now for you.

Playoff Lenny, boss dude, Lenny, it's the same thing, man.

I love it. I love it.
Thanks so much, Lenny. Thanks, dude.
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Okay, let's wrap up.

We got football guy of the week.

I still can't believe that guy's name is Jizz.

Yeah, it's awesome.

So awesome.

Jizz, what's the last name?

It doesn't matter.

But what was it?

It was good.

Horn Camp.

Yeah, Horn Camp was pretty good too.

That's the plot line for American Pie.

There it is. All right.
American Pie 2. Oh.
Well, she also talked to, if you want to analyze the joke. No, they went to the actual camp.
She kept saying. American Pie 3.
Yeah. American Pie 1 at band camp.
I stuck a flute in my pussy. But they actually went to the camp in 3.
They also said in American Pie 1 that band camp is basically an orgy sex ed. But the three, it's actually literally the plot.
Alright, I'm gonna explain all of Hank's jokes from now on. That's my new brand.
The Honk Joke Explainer. Honk? Want to do a joke? Do a joke.
I did love Jizz Horn Camp. I didn't realize.
That name literally translates to American Pie Presents Band Camp. That sucks.
The punchline is four words too long. I didn't realize that on the Barstool Sports website where you can look for open jobs, that we had flexible vacations, and it's a picture of paint.
Yeah. That's so fucking funny.
The shaming doesn't end. That's not, how is that a ricochet shot? I'm gonna hack into the

HTML and just like fix it, put

parentheses so it's like, but you'll be shamed

forever if you take one day off.

Explain that. Yeah, okay, so that's

Hank's saying that because we make fun of him whenever

he goes on vacation, which he does frequently.

Mm-hmm.

Oh!

I know that! You guys are gonna fuck around. I know that grunt.
You guys are going to fuck around and make me take a vacation right now. That was straight frustration.
Makes this fuck around to find out. If I'm going to get chained for it, I might as well earn my name.
That was a frustrating grunt. By the way, I don't think I mentioned this at the top, but you know that Stafford and McVay were in Cabo together? They're on vacation right now.
Vacation, that's where shit happens. Hanging out next to each other.
That's where shit gets done. Yeah, work actually happens more.
You get more done when you're not working. God, that's so mean to golf.
But how fucked up would that have been if they hadn't gotten the deal done? I know. And then they have to leave Cabo together, take the flight back, be like, hey, sorry.
PFT, I don't want to well actually everyone, but we do have to point out that technically the league year has not started. So either team could walk out away from this.
That's true. I love that.
I want that to happen so bad. I could see Dan Campbell doing this as his like, fuck you, I'm in the league now.
Where he makes his statement like, I'm not here to make friends. Someone offers him three first round picks picks.
All right, Football Guy of the Week, Billy. First up, we have Aaron Rodgers, who a lot of people don't know this, but in the Green Bay Packers practice facility, they actually have to drive from the locker room.
We do know that. Yeah, we've been there.
Yeah, a lot of times they'll take bikes with kids. Right, but the listeners might not know that.
Anyway, so Aaron Rodgers was taking – someone took a video ofaron rogers in the back of david bakhtari's truck uh waving around now the rack of coors light flag is that football guy or is that just a really bad message to the kids no no i mean like everybody someone could get really really hurt with aaron rogers uh breaking the law on camera and just basically being like oh yeah all the all the rules and regulations for operating a motor vehicle, fuck them, I'm bigger than that. I'm Aaron Rodgers.
Also don't get why I came out after the fact. So in some states, you can legally ride in the bathroom truck.
Not in Wisconsin. Is that a fact? Yep.
Well, who cares? So it's illegal. So he's illegal.
He's a bad boy. Put him in jail.
You know what? Put him in jail. There's thousands of people across America who play football, and driving to and from practice, you always try to get as many people in your car as you can, and having someone in the back in the trunk is, like, one of the classic things.
So classic. I think it's a lot of football that relates to it.
That only happens in football, too. No one else ever got in the back of a truck for any other reason but football.
I've just realized that most of what Billy says could very easily just be tweeted out from an account that's like, at only athlete problems. Yes, yes.
No, it's, but like the things you like put freshmen in the back. Total football move.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, let's start a new brand.
Total football move. Ride in the back of your boy's truck.
Freshman in the back. No, because you're – no, no.
I forgot to add this part.

You're in pads.

Sometimes you're wearing your helmet while driving.

Yeah.

Okay, that's another one.

Yeah.

You're wearing your helmet while driving your truck.

Total football move.

Who the – you're in full pads driving a car.

Yeah, that's that, bro.

Full pads driving a car.

Cole Beasley played on a broken tibia.

Yeah.

No, that is badass.

That's a fibula.

That's non-weight bearing. It's a fibula, not the tibia.
It's non-weight bearing. Okay.
So it wasn't even important? Very badass. Okay.
Anyway, Coach Gary Anderson turned down $2.7 million from Utah State because he felt he didn't earn it. Yeah, he sucks, so yeah.
Well, he, that's a pretty, just move to be like, fuck the money, I didn't earn it. Where does that money go if you don't pay somebody at a college money that you owe? Does that just sit? Go back to the foundation.
The library. The cafeteria.
Yeah. Cafeteria and library.
Money's not an object. Pizza parties every Friday.
He should actually take that money and just donate it to have a big ass barbecue for the college. School dance.
Yep. It's a concept.
Anyway, this was my favorite and I hope everyone votes for the Mormons. We might actually just change this.
It shouldn't be football guy of the week. It should be Billy's total football move of the week.
You know what? All these are very valid. No, Billy, it's good.
We like this. This is good.
This is why you're on the show, dude. Hold on one sec.
This is why you're on the show. You are unfiltered bro.
This is why we love you, okay? We've been jaded by culture. He's actually really smart.
Yeah, he's really smart. But PFT and I have been jaded by years of the internet, and it's just rotted our brains.
When we need unfiltered, straight-from-the-source bro, we go to you. Thank you.
I love that rule. Quinn Meniers, who's a D3 football player from Wisconsin-Whitewater.
Powerhouse. Yeah, I think they're like a dynasty in D3.
Anyway, went to the senior bowl practice week, totally balled out, was killing some D1 D tackles. He broke his hand during the week, during practice, and then went on to win offensive lineman of the week and went on to just be a total stud in the senior bowl game.
And it was sick seeing a guy who played at D3, you know, just go give it to, and he's going to go to the league. And that's just, that's just.
He's on your big board. He's on the big board.
Nice. He's a, he's a beast.
He's like, where do you have him going in your mouth? He's got, he's got a power belly that you don't see on many guys. I like that.
He's got a power belly. That's a fucking phrase

that Mike Mayock

could never even dream

of coining right there.

I like that.

That's power belly.

Chicken tendies.

That's D3 diet.

Hank had one for a while.

Hank had a little

power belly.

You'll find out, Billy,

after the fight,

you kind of forget

about working out and stuff.

I was talking about

the first one.

Oh, that was training.

I was trying to gain weight.

He wanted to be 200 pounds.

Almost made it. He just chugged milk every day.
Gowl of milk. Whole milk.
I got up to 190. It was all in my stomach.
He just had a fat-ass stomach. You don't want to get diesel this summer.
All right. Is that it? Are you ready, Billy? Do you want to talk about the fight real quick? Yeah, I'm very ready.
We have a couple of special guests coming on this week. I know.
Get you ready for the fight. There's been so much outpouring support.
It's really been kind of overwhelming. Yeah.
You know, I can promise you guys one thing. So actually a kid reached out to me, and he told me this story about how his grandfather planned a charity event for – I can't remember if the kids had terminal illness or they were special needs.
What? I got this DM. Big difference.
I got this. Huge difference.
Anyway, they paid Jose Canseco. So he's either going to die or not die.
They paid Jose Canseco. Let's just roll into one.
It was a special needs child that was going to die. I think it was all of the above.
Okay, got it. Okay, I'd pull it up.
Yeah, it was D all of the above. They paid Jose all expenses to come get an award in his honor.

The whole of... of the above anyway okay got it yeah okay i pull it up anyway they paid jose all expenses to come get an award in his honor the whole event was in his honor and he didn't show up and this guy's grandfather had to explain to all the kids why that he wasn't coming all the time they weren't going to meet the nvp okay and the turns out the guy's grandfather like mentioned it on his deathbed basically about how much how much he hated Jose.
And anyway, hearing all these stories, I can promise you one thing, that I'm going to go out there and give 180 seconds. Billy has been so moved by this story, he can't remember any of the details.
No, I like it, Billy. I like it.
You know what? Hashtag for the kids. I'll get the item up for the kids I'll get you know Billy I didn't want to slip up

because that is

either special needs

or

you just like

this story

really touched me

so much so

that I don't actually

remember any part

that could have been

paralyzed

you know what

it was actually

just a kid's

it was actually

just a kid's bar mitzvah

and Jose didn't come

you know what

look

I'm just gonna give

180 seconds

for the kids Thank you. It was actually just a kid's bar mitzvah, and Jose didn't come.
You know what?

Look, I'm just going to give 180 seconds a mile for everybody.

You know what you've got to say, Billy?

You've got to say we had a great camp.

We did have an amazing camp.

We had an amazing camp.

I've noticed that shaped my life.

So Billy actually set off the metal detectors on his way into Barstool H.

Excuse me.

There's no metal detectors.

Billy.

Come on, dude.

Billy.

Play along.

You're a weapon.

Because you're a weapon, man.

You're a weapon, dude.

Oh, yeah.

An absolute weapon.

After that. Anyone.
I mean, not professional. Yeah, no.
Yeah, except for people that are better at you. Tyson Fury, you're next, bro.
Tyson Fury will whoop my ass. But, like, you got to...
You should call it Tommy Fury. No, I'm serious.
Tyson's brother. Billy, there's actually a chance that Billy gets in a fight before the fight.
So we've got to make sure that doesn't happen. Billy, you know what? No, I love the gun.
We've got to get hyper-focused. So, Billy, if you win, if you win this fight.
When? When I win. When you win.
I predict that you're going to become addicted to challenging people to fight. Yes.
Which will be a great wrinkle to this show.

I'm retiring from Boston unless the Paul brother wants to fight me.

But they won't after they see this fight.

You should try to fight Patrick

Reed. No, no.

I'm not in that business. For the honor of the PGA.

I did this because

this opportunity arose, but

I'm fucking going to go balls to the

wall. I'm ready.
you're a weapon dude i'm

an absolute weapon i'm this i want to tell people this i'm a bleeder whoa and i'm gonna be oh i'm gonna be light okay in the way in but it's all speed agility and accelerating my fists with power and

you're describing

boxing very well

I don't give up

I can get hit

I can look like I'm about to die when I'm a zombie. One thing you're going to hear a lot, Billy, is everyone's got to plan until they get punched in the mouth.
What is your response to that? I've been punched several times. Billy has no plan.
If you have no plan, you can't have the panic of having no plan. This chaos in the room.
You can't take a plan away from a man who has no. I literally have nothing to lose.
Billy is tenacious. We actually lock Billy out of the office every day, and every day he finds a way to get in.
Yep. Through the metal detectors.
There's no quit in this guy. Billy, do you think that you could kill me with a punch right now? I could break your jaw.

But not kill me.

Well, you better kill me

if you punch me. Yeah.

I'll take you down to first punch. Alright, what numbers we got?

11.

99. 8.
18. Viruses

don't have nuclei.

That's not an animal fact.

No, it's not.

It's not an animal fact. Sounds like Billy's been researching

some vaccines. Uh-oh.
Billy's been 31. Oh, there we go.
Happy birthday. No, it's not.
It's not an animal fact. Sounds like Billy's been researching some vaccines.

Uh-oh.

Billy's been...

31.

Oh, there we go.

Happy birthday.

Oh, wait.

Yeah.

Did I...

What was your guess, 31?

I always say 30-something.

Oh, yeah, you always say 31.

Everyone knows that Billy always says 31.

Okay, Patrick.

That's a big time.

Nice cheat.

You should have been here.

I try not to get it.

This is everything PFT and I said about Patrick Reed cheating how dumb he is.

That was what Billy just did. I'm not trying to cheat.
I don't want to get it. Oh is everything PFT and I said about Patrick Reed cheating how dumb he is.
That was what Billy just did.

I'm not trying to cheat.

I don't want to get it.

Oh, but dude, I always say 31.

Love you guys. We'll be right back.
Thank you. Take me on.
Take me on. Take me on.
Take me on. It's so needless to say.
I'm all just saying it. But I'm so let away.
It's so let alone that life is okay. Say a dream Thank you.
Take me off Take me off Take me off Things that say isn't love Just play my very way You're all the things I've come to remember Can you shine it on me? I'll be good for you anyway Can you shine it on me? I'll be good for you anyway Take on me Take on me Take me Take on me. Take on me.
Take me. Take on me.
Take on me. Take on me.
Take me. Take on up.
Take a lead. Take a lead.
Take a lead. Take a lead.
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