NFL Week 12 Recap, Deion Sanders, Fastest 2 Minutes

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We have week 12. Week 12 recap.
We recap every single game. We have Deion Sanders on the show.
We have fastest two minutes. We have football guy of the week.
We have baby brawn of the week. We have Who's Back.
It is a Monday PMT.

It is chock full of content.

We are ready to roll.

We're going to get right back to the show.

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Okay, let's go. Now in the street there is violence And then a lot of work to be done No place to hang out or wash in And then I can't live all on the sun Oh no We're gonna rock down to Electric Avenue And then we'll take it higher, we're gonna rock down to Electric Avenue.

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Today is Monday, November 30th, week 12 we start an indie where the hennessy titans were sipping the ajJ. Brown liquor, taking shots, shots, shots, shots, shots, shots, shots, everybody downfield all day.
Derek Moranis finally fought back, punching Indy in the mouth, while family man Phillip Rivers said, honey, I spunked the kids. T, why you gotta be so rude? Hilton flashed some magic with a one-hit wonder in the end zone, but the Colts got their aircraft carrier domes sunk, and in the famous words of our dear friend Chris Berman, Frank Reich yelled to Mike Vrabel, Rodrigo, you sunk my blankenship.
Titans 45, Colts 26. What? What? In Minnesota, where Vikings kick returner went from Verge to Chad,B.
muffed a kick in the fourth, only to come back with a game-winning touchdown. Mike Zimmer was listening to old-school fireside chats to prepare for the return of Bridgewater because the last time a leader could use a walker, Teddy's Cousins was on the radio.
Robbie Mr. Anderson and DJ Morpheus may trick us into thinking the Panthers are good, but they lost by the one to the Vikings.
Vikings 28, the Panthers 27. In windy Buffalo, a combined six turnovers between the Chargers and Bills had the ball being tossed around like an Instagram model in a son's hotel room, but in this instance, the last tall ball players could not finish with inches to go.
Shout out, Billy. Anthony Linsanity has the brain of a syphilitic woodpecker, and Joey Bosa Nostra worked closely with the Bills Mafia to put a hit out on the Chargers head coach.
Hey, Anthony, why don't you go down and grab a dress down there? Yeah, yeah, keep walking right down there. Ray, yeah, go check out that dress, Anthony.
Go, go, go. And no one circles the wagons like the Buffalo Bills.
Bills 27, Chargers 17. Whip, whip.
In Cincinnati, where Bruce Wayne, Da-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na- the Bengals' defense as the Giants played conservatively and they head in the right direction.

The New York football Giants, 19, the Bengals, 17.

In Foxborough, where Jonathan Alex Jones was relitigating the 2008 election of his true Patriots versus an alleged Kenyon,

as Drake had 78 yards and two scores.

Even though Kai-Laurie Laughlin Murray had a full house to throw to

for U.S. to see,

the Cardinals struggled to gain admission to the end zone.

Nick Folklore swiftly saved the last great American dynasty as the Patriots are still in the hunt.

Patriots 20, Cardinals 17.

What?

Some spread.

In Jacksonville, where let me be the last to wish you a happy Thanksgiving,, Carvis Landry took one look at Mike Glenn and the turkey and said, hey Clark, save the neck for me. Nick, you can find me in the chub.
You can have two quarterbacks, but I'll have the 50 cent. Many men tried to stop the Cleveland running Russian game, but when that worked, Baker Mayfield took them to the Landry shop.
Cleveland 27, the Jets worth 25. In New Jersey, where the NFL honored Ryan Fitzpatrick and Joe Flacco's exhausted wives during the last month of Salute to Cervix Month, the Jets hyperdrive gave them a 3-0 lead in the first quarter and then took the rest of the day off.
In true New York fashion, Devontae, hey, I'm parking over here, worked all afternoon

in traffic. Xavier and Ron Howard

continued their happy days, delivering

a hillbilly elegy to the

coastal elites of the New York Jets.

Dolphins, 20. Jets,

3. They scored 3.

3 points. Hyperdrive.
3 points.

Standing on the corner, Jameis Winston

down in Nola, such a fine sight to see It's dinner my lord He's in a hospital ward Starting a practice squad rookie Come on team Start to be Let's get stoned Ask the team doctor For one of three's pills Saints go marching 31-3 And in Tampa Bay where Patrick starred And Travis Keenan and Kelsey were all that As the Chiefs slimed the Bucs Tom Brady Anderson may need a little extra help To finish out this season As the Bucs lose three their last four. Andy Creed said, I can take you higher as the Chiefs are starting to peak at the right time and Mahomes keeps dropping balls to his receivers with arms wide open.
The Chiefs win 27-24. We finish in L.A.
as Jared Goffis Depot supplied Jared Mother Kinlaw the football who took it for a surprise visit to the end zone. L.A.
and Cam A. Kirstie Alley waited and watched as the 49ers and Debo Samuel Jackson played with Nick Furry Mullins.
Looked unbreakable as they gave the Rams a shaft. It's not going to be a Hollywood ending in Los Angeles, as Aaron Sorkin Donald might have blown up a few plays,

but the Rams fall down a game in the NFC West Wing.

The Niners hold off the Rams 23-20.

We're going to get right back to the show.

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accounts automatic protections for who can contact your teen and the content they can see all right back to part of my take okay week 12 in the books as we are taping this the bears are on national television they're down 34 to 10 same story different year they fucking suck. The Packers

have embarrassed them yet again

on national television. I don't really know what else to say.
Mitch didn't look. If you take out the fumble and the two picks, Mitch looked pretty good.
The two fumbles. Well, no.
He picked that back up. And there was also a face mask on that one.
He picked up the other one, the other fumble. There was one and a half fumbles, two picks.
They look like a competenter offense. I don't want to say competent, but they – I don't know.
There's something about Mitch. I think maybe it's just the fact that he looks alive when he plays quarterback.
He can run. Whereas Nick Foles, when he's back there, sometimes he just looks like a corpse.
So they appear to be slightly better, but still, I mean, you guys got dog walk tonight. This is dog walk.
I don't want to rag on Mitch because, again, he did look more alive than Nick Foles, so the offense had a little spunk, and I say that even though we got our asses fucking kicked and the Packers did what they always do to us and just fucking punk us. Well, what about Matt Nagy saying that he is taking off play calling so he can spend more time around other groups on the sidelines? Who cares? Is that him trying to insert himself into the good parts of the football team? I don't know.
He's just trying to get everyone to be like, hey. He's walking up to everyone being like, hey, at the exit interview, you're going to say I did a good job? Right.
You're going to say you like me? I think what he's doing, and I think he's doing it futilely, is trying to become the Dan Quinn of this year, where he tries to get the team to go to bat for him at the end of the season. I mean, the Bears will do whatever the—what's Murphy's Law? Whatever can go wrong will go wrong? Alive and dead at the same time.
Murphy's cat. Whatever the right decision is, the Bears will do the opposite.
I think Murphy's Law is just whatever the Bears would do, that's what happens. Yeah, it's just the worst possible thing.
So the only two things I had about Mitch. One, and again, I'm not ragging on Mitch because he was – I mean, the defense sucks now.
Akeem Hicks, I've told you a million times, most important player. He didn't play tonight.
Mitch, you're in year four, dude. When you get outside the pocket, you can't get a penalty for throwing it away.
Okay, so Mitch, very mitch thing to do is just get outside the pocket and run out of bounds four yard loss yeah still doing that two i don't know what we got to do but it's so bears to have mitch like i i don't think i've seen one person in the in the age of covid sitting on the sideline with the like 30 cent uh disposable mask that you get at CVS. Yet Mitch has it.
We couldn't even get him a fucking team logo mask. That's what the Bears are at.
He bought it himself and brought it. It's a fucking joke.
This team, this franchise is a joke. The Packers kicked our ass.
I still fuck the Packers, but they kicked our ass. But fuck them.
And I can't wait for them to lose because David Montgomery ripped off a...

Dude, David Montgomery ripped off a run

that the Bears haven't had that type

of run in like five

years. So you guys basically

lost this game. So right now, David Montgomery

has six carries for 73

yards. Yeah, the Packers lost.
If I went

just on David Montgomery

and his

ability to run when the Bears

have not been able to run all year,

all like the last two years,

I'm going to go off. Okay.
Fair? Aaron Rodgers, also you held him to only 172 yards passing. Well, it's only the third quarter.
That's a win. So this could easily get way – again, this will get way worse.
You know what just occurred to me? So there are certain elements of Mitchell Trubisky's game where he looks like a slightly worse version of Carson Wentz.

I think maybe it's like their build, their stature,

how they run around like a chicken with their head cut off in the backfield

when the play breaks down.

Would you want a Carson Wentz on the Bears next year?

Dude, I don't know.

I don't even want – I'd be cool if the Bears just not playing football anymore. Just implode the team? Stop the count? No, I want them to exist, but I just...
Maybe take one year off. Just take one year off, give everyone a break, at least get us off of primetime television.
I think I speak for America when I say the Bears playing in one of the primetime slots needs to end. Next year when the schedule comes out, you give us that fucking one Thursday game early in the season, the Jacksonville Jaguars rule, give us that Thursday game, and then be done with it.
No more Bears in primetime. Don't give us a fucking Monday night game.
Oh, I don't think you have to worry about that anymore. No, they still will.
I think the NFL learned their lesson. They still will, dude.
You'll get one. We're coming off a terrible year last year.
We had like five this year. They're still going to do it.
They're going to do it because they want to punish us. I think Goodell knows better than to do that.
It's a joke. Get us off.
Fucking national television. This franchise sucks.
I still hate the Packers. They suck too.
They gave up that run to David Montgomery. So I'm going to, you know what? Would you rather have a Super Bowl trophy or a 50-yard run that David Montgomery ripped off in the first quarter in a game they're going to lose by, like, 35.
A soft team that can't stop David Montgomery. Personally.
Everyone stops David Montgomery. I would rather have David Montgomery on this.
Everyone stops David Montgomery, and the Packers couldn't, so you do the math. All right, well, we'll update as this gets way worse.
I'm sure it will because Aaron Rodgers loves running it up on the Bears. All right, let's get into Week 12.
Are we going to see Jordan Love's situation? Maybe. We could.
Maybe. Maybe.
I don't know. He's thinning for Chicago.
Maybe. Maybe Tyler Bray gets in.
It is crazy, though, watching this game and seeing – like Mitch hasn't played great, but how – if you're Matt Nagy, like how are you not starting him? And this isn't a knock on Nick Foles. It's just that Nick Foles, without an offensive line, Nick Foles is a dinosaur.
You can't have a quarterback like that. Mitch can at least run.
Yes, you're not waiting for Nick Foles to take the next step. Nick Foles took the next step, and then he took promptly a step directly backwards after that.
He won a Super Bowl. That was the next step.
That's the end of the discussion of how good can this guy get. And we know that he regressed back to exactly what he's been.
So nobody was watching the Bears this season thinking like, okay, next game I think Foles is going to figure it out in this offense and he'll look more comfortable. With Mitch, you might get like a couple splash plays in a game.
Jake, can you look up a stat for me real quick? They got Mitch a better mask. How long was that? They did? Nice.
How long was that David Montgomery run in the first quarter? Can you look that up again? It was 57 yards, Big Cat. That run was 57 yards? Yeah, gashed him for 57 yards.
Absolutely gashed him. Suck it.
Suck it. That should be one of the tie-breaking scenarios, Big Cat.
If it comes down to it, and it's like it's you and some other team in the NFC West,

did they give up over 50 yards in a single play to David Montgomery? Nope. Well, guess what? You're getting it over.
When you walk into like facilities, team facilities, we've been to a bunch in college. They always have like a video board that plays highlights and they'll have the trophies.
When you walk into House Hall from now, from here on forward, it should be the 85 Bears trophy,

and then on repeat, David Montgomery's 57-yard run in the first quarter of a game that the Bears end up losing by like 40.

Longest play from scrimmage this year.

Dude, the Packers suck.

The Packers suck.

They lost this game.

If you want to call it man-to-man,

they lost this game and they know they lost this game.

Are you talking about the run?

The run.

Yeah, the run.

Exactly.

The run.

Who can never forget? There wasn't even a touchdown. No, it didn't need to be.
It was right up the middle. Like if you look at a football field where all the players, they're usually in the middle of the field.
That's where David went on the run. Someone remake that for me tomorrow morning.
When I wake up, I want to have that run with the Rudy music. It's the longest play from scrimmage for the Bears since the 70-yard touchdown from Tariq Cohen in

2018. Dude, and the Packers gave this up?

Like I said, the Packers suck.

This is a win for the Bears.

I feel good about this game.

Since Jordan Howard's 69-yard run in 2016.

Yeah, the run. This is

the run. Where were you for the run?

I was sitting right in this seat.

And they got a field goal.

I was walking into the kitchen, and I saw it on the TVs that were set up in the football cave here, and I literally said, the Bears are going to win this game after that run. That's how impressive it was.
Turns out I was wrong about half of that, but I don't regret feeling that. When the run happened, I was sitting in my seat, and I didn't get out of my seat, but I thought about it.
And then I fired off a tweet. This offense is explosive.
You can actually go see the timestamp. If you're wondering where were you during the run? Yeah.
That I was tweeting. This offense is explosive.
So the run, that's how you felt. Yeah.
And that's what people will go away from this game. Feelings can never be wrong.
Nope. You feel what you feel.
People will be talking about the run for years and years and years. And guess what? They won't be talking about the bears getting dog walk yeah or aaron rogers you know oh he's so good no the run you got run on uh all right let's get into the rest of the games titans colts speaking of run on holy shit so it is officially tractor cedo season uh i have some stats for you these are always fun the derrick henry stats that pop when it gets to late November, early December are the fucking best so he went 27 for 178 yards 3 touchdowns in the first half the Titans had 449 yards now I'll throw it out there for Colts fans DeForest Buckner was on the COVID list but this is Tractor Cito.
If you're not familiar with Tractor Cito season,

Derrick Henry's a beast later in the year.

So weeks one through 11, 4.37 yards per carry, 22 touchdowns.

That's 50 games.

50 games, 22 touchdowns.

Weeks 12 on, 5.61 yards per carry, so 1.3 yards more.

23 games, 25 touchdowns. 23 games, 25 touchdowns versus 50 games, 22 touchdowns.
It's pretty impressive. It's fucking Tractor Cito's season.
No one wants to hit him when it gets cold outside. Yeah.
You ever take a soccer ball to the ear when it's cold outside? Same thing like Tractor Cito. He's a flower that blooms in the wintertime.
I mean, he runs extremely violently. And it's not just us who like notice this no no of course everyone does he looks like he looks like a night and day different player in uh weeks it was like a couple weeks ago this season that it started yeah a little bit early this year but it's night and day compared to like weeks two and three besides that one stiff arm that he had on josh norman who weighs like 150 pounds early in season, he wasn't running.
He didn't put anything on tape that looked as just like spectacularly violent as he's been the last two weeks. He also, so we watch all the games here in the office.
We have six TVs. We have direct TV.
So we set it up. We have five games in red zone going on.
Fuck you, Andrew Siciliano. I don't mean that, but I do.
And there was a moment where, so we had the Colts-Titans game on, and there was a moment where, so Red Zone's on, Derrick Henry's scoring a touchdown on Red Zone on one TV, on the Titans and Colts live on one TV, and they were showing replays of his other touchdown on two other TVs. So there were four out of six TVs were just Derrick Henry being a beast.
Which I wasn't complaining about at all. And that's how good he is.
He was just hogging all of the TVs just being a monster. And that first half, that was an absolute ass-kicking.
And I don't know... I don't know the Packers just scored again, but they didn't...
Guess what? It was like a 20-yard run, not a 57-yard run. I don't know what to make of the Titans because when they look like this, it's like – They're a very confusing team.
Titans and the Raiders. I would say, yeah, Titans and the Raiders are my two most confusing teams by far in the NFL right now.
And guess what? You kind of know what the Colts are, and the Colts – I think someone got hurt on the Colts' offensive line. Costanzo, which is big.
Big deal. Especially Phillip Rivers.
He can't move. Cannot move.
And they're slowly benching Phillip Rivers. That's the only thing I can think of.
They're benching him gradually. It used to be just for Hail Marys.
Then it was Hail Marys and QB sneaks. Then it was Hail Marys, QB sneaks at any time that they might want to run a quarterback option.
And now it's like sometime on third and short, they'll take Rivers out. They're just gradually putting Jacoby Brissett into the game.
And eventually, we're only going to get Phillip Rivers in a situationally specific scenario where they need an interception. Right.
And he had, oh my God, that drop interception the Titans had. He had a bad game, and it could have looked a lot worse.
But, yeah, the Colts, I don't know. Are they going to make the playoffs? Probably.
But I just don't trust them because Phil Rivers, bringing him to the Colts was a good idea in theory. But I don't know.
It feels like the Colts have enough. There should be a tiebreaker in place in the NFL because it's going to come down to Tennessee and Indianapolis indianapolis obviously for the afc south there should be a tiebreaker in place because we could end up in a scenario where indy gets in over tennessee having the same record but if you watch this game of football you're like tennessee is a much much better football team like there should be an eyeball test that goes into the like how goodell always talks about yeah if a hundred drunk guys in a bar think it's a catch, they should get a hundred drunk people together to vote on whether or not Tennessee is a better football team than Indy if it does come down to a tiebreaker.
Because the answer is yes. Tennessee's a much better football team.
I'm looking at right now, the Colts will make the playoffs. So they have the Texans twice and the Jaguars remaining.
And then the Raiders and the Steelers are mixed in there in between. They'll make the playoffs because they'll get, like say they split with the Texans, beat the Jaguars, which I guess they didn't beat them, and then split the Raiders-Steelers.
That's 10 wins. Remind me to please bet against the Colts in the playoffs.
Yes. Because they are the quintessential everything-has-to-be-perfect team.
They have to play from a lead. They have to protect Philip Rivers.
They've got to be able to run the ball, which they weren't able to do pretty much any of those things today. And listen, they can win games.
They were coming off beating the Packers last week. They can win games and be a good-looking team, but when it goes bad, it looks really bad.
They shouldn't have beaten the Pack the Packers though I still feel like the Packers should have won that game um that's crazy they lost the Jaguars week one they play they play a much different style of football when that roof's closed that's what I'm gonna say Mr. Ursa keep the roof I'm not gonna be as down on the Colts actually I'm thinking about it they're not they're like the fourth best fifth best team in the AFC I think they're a perfectly fine, but if you look at the butt kicking that happened today, you can't say that they deserve to get in over the Tennessee Titans.
I guess. Absolutely not.
Yeah, and the question goes to, like, if you're a Colts fan, do you actually trust that Phillip Rivers can win a playoff team, let alone two or three? No. I want to be very clear, though.
I do want to see Phillip Rivers in the playoffs. Yes, of course.
That's a no-brainer. Of course.
And shout-out to the Titans. That's a big win.
That's an impressive win for them. They fucking kicked their ass.
No doubter. And maybe they got their swagger back.
All right, next up. I would like to see a wild-card banner get raised to the rafters in Indianapolis.
Yes. AFC wild-card qualifier.
Yes, yes. 2020 Colts.
Yes. All right.
Next up, Giants-Bengals.

So the Giants were able to hold off the Bengals. Daniel Jones gets hurt, which let's talk about the Washington football team real quick.
They win big on Thursday, Thanksgiving Day. They momentarily take the lead in the NFC East.
The Giants snatch it back from them. But I think the Washington football team's strategy is starting to finally come to full fruition here.
It is essentially like pass the ball five yards down the field with Alex Smith and then wait for every other quarterback in the NFC East to get hurt. Yeah.
And that's the strategy, and it's now we're two-thirds of the way there. And Carson Wentz, I don't even know if you'd want him to get hurt.
I think you want to keep him playing. No, I want to keep him in.
But Dak getting hurt, now Daniel Jones may be getting hurt for a while. It's all kind of fallen in place where this is a genius strategy by Ron Rivera.
Play defense, short passes, let everyone else get hurt. Well, and the thing is, we've got, yeah, we did lose one quarterback to a leg injury.
But that was an addition by subtraction. There's another one who has a history of leg injuries, and then a third that's been out indefinitely with diarrhea for two months.
But we do have that third to fall back on. We do have Dwayne Haskins in case, heaven forbid, anything happens to Alex Smith.
But also, the Washington football team, football club's strength is still their pass defense. Yeah.
And the WFT FC's strength is a defensive line that will get after the quarterback. Montez Sweat played like a fucking beast on Thanksgiving.
Chase Young is, again, as advertised. Jonathan Allen.
We've got a bunch of really talented players on that defense. And the running game is really strong.
Antonio Gibson is a fucking monster, and I think that, well, here's the thing, with Daniel Jones getting injured, Colt McCoy comes in, who at his, he is as good as an average Daniel Jones. Although Daniel Jones was starting to play well.
He was starting to play well. The Giants' defense is legit, though.
The Giants' defense is very much legit.

They basically held the Bengals scoreless until their prevent defense.

You know, the kick return happened.

But the Giants' defense is very, very legit.

They also have a few playmakers where it's like they – it all comes down to Daniel Jones.

If Daniel Jones – I think if you're the Giants,

you basically say fuck it for this game against Seattle coming up in Seattle. Let Daniel Jones get healthy, hopefully, and then hit that home stretch of four games where three or four of them are at home.
And yeah, I still think the Giants, they're a good-ish team. Okay, here's the thing.
I'm looking at the football team, football club schedule moving forward. And yes, they play the Steelers.
You're a little biased with your viewing of the schedule. Okay, well, Big Cat, I had you back on the run.
Well, the run, I mean, how could you not? So we're about to go on our run. And we have the Steelers next week.
Steelers are going to be coming off a short week on Tuesday night. So it's four nights.
They have four days to rest after playing a physical football game against their heated rival. That's a big letdown game.
Football team could take that one. Week after that, 49ers.
Now you might say the 49ers are a good team, a well-coached team that is capable of beating anybody in the NFC. That's where you're wrong on this one, Big Cat, because even though the game is scheduled to be played in San Francisco, the entire county of Santa Clara has ruled that you can't have sporting events.
So that game might take place in Washington. I don't think so.
Anything can happen at that point. I think they'll play somewhere on the West Coast.
So that's two wins in a row. And then in week 15, we get the Seahawks.
I'm going to chalk that up as a loss. Okay.
Hand up. Okay.
Then Panthers at home. Which are their frisky-ass team.
We could win. Yeah.
And then week 17, the Eagles. At the Eagles.
At the Eagles. But the Giants have a need.
That's four wins. The Giants, if we do the same thing with the Giants schedule, they play at the Seahawks.
Okay, you want to chalk that up because it's a loss. At home against the Cardinals.
At home against the Browns. I mean, how is that? This is where the bias comes from.
Cardinals are not good. There's two playoff teams right now.
I don't think the Cardinals are a playoff team anymore. I think they might be.
I don't think they are. According to my playoff machine.
They might be because of the NFC. In which I've simulated.
It's tough because I spend so much time on the ESPN playoff machine that it just remembers my picks sometimes. And so, yeah, I already have the Cardinals beating the Rams next week in this scenario.
I basically create a little glimpse into my brain using this software device that just makes me feel better knowing that the Washington football team is going to get that. They basically have the same schedule, and you somehow have it as, like, the Washington football team has an easy schedule versus the Giants have the hardest schedule ever.
Well, they don't have the same. So the Giants also have to go to Baltimore.
Okay. Which, I mean, if you want to substitute games in and out, I would rather go to San Francisco or wherever that game is going to be played.
I don't know. Baltimore the way they're playing.
You can go to Baltimore. I don't know about that.
And then the Giants also have the Browns. Also, Kyle Shanahan has revenge.
The Browns at home. Yeah, which.
It's a tough game. That's a tough game.
I'd rather have...

All right, we got to get back to the Giants' bankers.

I'd rather play the Panthers at home than the Browns at home.

Yeah, sure, but that's not the game that you're substituting, right?

The Cardinals would be the team that you would be substituting for the Panthers.

Either one of those.

Either one of those.

Cardinals are not good.

I don't think.

They beat the football team.

They are struggling.

We'll get to them later.

All right, but yes. So, yeah, so the Giants were good today.
They played great defense. I love that Zach Taylor is coaching like a guy who's got a team that's 2-8 because we'll get to Anthony Lynn in a second.
But the fake punt was great. And my question to you, PFT, is the Giants win this game, but did Joe Judge personally lose this game? Because he's a special teams coach.
The Bengals returned a kick on his ass. They did a fake fucking punt on his ass.
And then at the end of the game, they had like a 20-yard return when they needed it for field goal range on his ass. Yeah, they cucked him out of his own specialty.
Did Joe Judge personally lose this game? I think it's

more of a negative than a positive for Joe Judge.

Yeah, you beat a 2-8 team without their

starting quarterback, and they dominated

your facet of the game that you're supposed to

be a specialist in. So yeah, some of that

shine has gone off the Joe Judge.

Did he even have a shine?

No, he's got shine right now, dude.

He's having a moment. Dude, the

Giants are a goodish team. They are.
Listen, I'm talking shit about the Giants because I want, and I truly do believe in the Washington football team, but the Giants are a good team. Their defense is good.
And we even have Giants fans advocating for, yeah, maybe we should look at trading Saquon Barkley in the offseason. It is very funny.
It moves so quickly. Going into the season, he was

the only thing that they had to root for. The thing that

they were looking forward to the most. And I was like, yeah,

get his ass out of here. It is very funny in the office

because we're obviously in a New York

office and the Giants have been so

bad. They've lost the most games, I think,

in the NFL in the last

five years. It's

funny figuring

out who's a Giants fan. They're popping up.
They're fucking sprouting left and right. They're like, oh, oh, oh.
Like, I know, like, Clem is a diehard. There's a couple guys that are diehards.
And then every now and then it's like, oh, oh, Giants? Jets? I didn't know. Yeah.
And I'm not, that's not like a knock. They've been so bad, what would they cheer for? Right.
But it is funny, like, oh, the Giants are starting to make some noise. And just so you know, when I say Giants fans, I've heard start to say that they would trade Saquon Barkley.
I'm talking about Glynnie Balls. So I don't know if that's an accurate assessment of the entire fan base.
I choose to believe that it is because I believe that Glynnie is just an accurate representation of everything in America right now. Something about the Giants and their uniforms, when they start playing well, I just like, they're a uniform team for me.
They're like the Steelers. Whenever they start playing well, I'm like, they could go to the Super Bowl.
I've been calling them good-ish. I like the Bengals uniforms today.
The white ones, those are sweet. I got confused.
I always do whenever Brandon Allen's name pops up because I was expecting to be a fat guy because I'm pretty sure there's an offensive lineman, a very good offensive lineman named Brandon Allen. I played for the chiefs yeah uh and i just always expected to be him at quarterback and it never is and i'm always disappointed yep yep uh so the giants i'm keeping them in my goodish territory uh i'm kind of out on a limb calling them goodish don't let me down although now it's colt mccoy so we'll fucking see but their defense is legit and they have fucking playmakers like every time they look.
Like Evan Ingram starting to play is such a found money thing for the Giants right now. And Darius Slayton.
And they have guys. Like Wayne Gallman's not terrible.
Right. Yeah, when Evan Ingram starts to play well, he looks like Hakeem Nix did at his best.
Yeah. A little bit.
He's got a little bit of that vibe. I don't know.
Something about the Giants, I'm captivated. I think they have something going on.
That's what I'll say. Colt McCoy does have the revenge game against the Browns, and he does have the revenge factor against the entire Washington football team, trying to beat them out down the stretch.
So who knows what's going to happen. We're just blessed to be living in a day and age where a 6-10 NFC East team is probably going to make the playoffs.
Yes. And I'm very excited.
Yes, it is going to happen. All right, next up, Chargers Bills.
I just alluded to this. Anthony Lynn.
So as much as Zach Taylor gets credit for coaching a 2-8 team, being like, fuck it, nothing to lose, let's go for it. Anthony Lynn, you are the opposite.
You are a coward. You are a chicken shit.
I cannot believe this guy is ruiningin herbert in this talented roster that's pretty much i don't want to pile on but you're a fucking nincompoop and you got nothing in your brain i don't air in his brain i don't even think that he's like a coward i think he's just a bird brain that's the only descripting phrase i can come up with for anthony lynn's brain he's a bird brain i don't mean that he has a bird's brain bears seven nothing in the fourth quarter i don't mean that he has a bird's brain. Bears 7-0 in the fourth quarter winning time.
I don't mean that he has a bird's brain inside of his skull. Did you see they haven't scored a point in the third quarter this whole season? That's flying around in there all the time.
Yes, a bird flying around. They actually have scored two touchdowns.
He's a fucking bird brain. He's a coward.
He is a coward. You know what? He is a coward, but he gets confused sometimes.
He's a panic guy. Yes, he's a panic guy.
At the end of the game, when he was trying to figure out whether he was going to kick a field goal to go down by seven points or score a touchdown to go down by three, he had no idea which way that he wanted to lose a one-score game by. So he kept sending his opposite teams out on the field, back and forth, back and forth, and then he ran the dumbest play that I've seen probably in the NFL all year, which was the quarterback sneak by Justin Herbert, where he had the offensive line drop back into pass protection.
Nobody blocked forward, and then Justin Herbert just took a snap on her center and got tackled immediately. Yeah, they all went backwards towards him.
So that ended the game. Now, they weren't going to win the game, but the fact that you don't have the presence of mind like, hey, we're down 10, you've got to spike it and kick a field goal and then get your prayer.
No, he runs the ball. It's pretty much the only thing you can't do.
You can do a pass play, you can do anything. But let's throw that out.
It is funny, though, that he... The biggest conundrum in Anthony Lynn's bird brain was trying to figure out which way he wanted to lose.
Would I rather score a touchdown here and then have to... It didn't make sense to him.
He's like, I'm used to just always losing by one score and have it being close at the end. This isn't close, but I can still lose by one score.
How do I make that work? What's the smartest way for me to do that? And the answer, he should have just picked one way and done something competent with it besides throwing like a million goal line fades, which is another thing that he's addicted to.

And he even brought out the field goal unit with like three seconds left.

Yeah.

Like, oh shit, I forgot.

So the other Anthony Lynn dumb dumb thing,

at the end of the first half when he calls a timeout,

but he waits for like 20 seconds, doesn't know what he's doing,

and then doesn't go for it on fourth and two,

I think like the 45-yard line. Dude, you're two and eight.
You're 2-8. Just fucking go for it.
You're 2-8. What are you doing? And we should give credit to the Bills defense because the Bills defense looked back to last year's Bills defense coming out of the bye.
Like, if they figure out their defense, that's a scary, scary team because we know that their offense has weapons and can score. But man, their defense like finally looked competent against a Chargers offense that has been able to put up points.
They've got dudes on their offense. Yeah.
I think that I think numbers just ruined Anthony Lynn's mind. I think that there are certain football guys that should never have been introduced to the world of analytics or advanced strategy, and they should always be gut guys.
And I think that Anthony Lynn is one of those dudes who just got poisoned by math when he became a head coach, and now he's afraid to make any decision because he's still thinking about what the numbers might tell him. If you have a guy that is just straight up a football guy, like Neanderthal-type head coach, just let them be themselves when they become a head coach and don't try to turn them into Nate Silver.
So, Anthony Lynn, here's a positive spin for the Chargers. Anthony Lynn's so incompetent that he's going to get fired.
And you have a chance here to hire a real coach, which I would actually throw out there that the Chargers job is probably going to be one of the top jobs out there simply by the fact that Justin Herbert looks for real. You have Joey Bosa, who is also very much for real.
He was a beast today. You have the recipe for a championship window.
The quarterback on his rookie deal, who in the next couple of years could be a bona fide guy on his rookie deal, and then you build up the roster around it, you have the ability now. The Chargers actually have, like in today's NFL, the three, four-year window here that could actually be something.
So I think that from a coaching perspective, you should get the pick of the litter from who your next coach is. Go get Eric Biennemi, go get Joe Brady, whatever it may be.
That's a good spin zone. Anthony Lynn still is a fucking idiot.
Some people would say it's not as attractive because then you have to play the Chiefs twice a year. I would say you were wrong about that because you have a built-in excuse to not win your division.
Correct. Because nobody is going to blame you for getting beat twice by the Chiefs in a year.
No one's going to blame you if the Chiefs go like 14-2 for the next four or five years, and you finish in that wild card spot. People are going to be like, well, shit, that's Patrick Mahomes, who's the best quarterback that we've ever seen.
So you have a built-in excuse ready to go, which is your most important part about taking any job in the NFL. Be ready to have that fired up.
The Chargers play the Chiefs well. They've played them well.
So it's, yeah, I just think it's a very attractive job. Give credit to Josh Allen.
He got a hockey assist today. Josh Allen.
Josh Allen is the best number one guy reaching for the end zone. Yeah.
How tall he is. He's got the big hands.
The hands. He is so good at doing that.
That touchdown run was awesome. If you were to design a human body to stretch out for the goal line, you would make Josh Allen.
Speaking of which, he broke his ankle, and he was fine. I don't know what happened on that.
He got bent back. He pounded the turf.
And when you see a guy. His ankle completely rolled up.
I don't know how he was able to come back and be effective. There are different levels of a guy being hurt on the ground where you can just tell how bad the injury is.
The head and the hands is always a bad one. The pounding of the turf with one hand while you're face-butting the turf is another really bad sign.
And that's what he did. He got up, limped off the field, and came back two plays later after Matt Barkley took an extreme sack to his big, wide chest.
Yeah, he thought he was Josh Allen for a second. He's like, oh, if I just play quarterback for the Bills here, I'll have all of his skills.
And he did a step where Josh Allen would have stepped and been able to get free, and he did that and just got absolutely blown up. Josh, on the play that he did get injured on, was a classic Josh Allen play where he pressed all the buttons on his way down.

He was trying to get two more steps in,

and then at the very last second he was like,

fuck it, I'll just try to throw a double pass to my running back.

But yeah, I'm glad that he's not hurt.

The Bills look good.

Their defense looks good.

That's the biggest thing.

The defense looks good coming out of the bye,

and if their defense can get shit together a little bit,

that's a scary, scary team.

Also, put a pin in this one, Alex Kemp.

You know I'm mad about a game that I lost money on

when I look up who the ref crew was.

Alex Kemp, that's the crew.

Don't ever let me bet on a game with him again

because those flags were so fucking ridiculous.

That flag that, who was it moscot for uh unnecessary or was unsportsmanlike conduct when he literally just rolled over on the guy yeah getting tackled fuck those guys josh allen got a flag for spinning the ball on the end it was crazy it was crazy you know what game he's officiating thank you thank you Thank you. Thank you.
Fucking motherfucking pieces of shit. Jake, is he one of the beard guys? Maybe just bet the under.
There are like three different crews in the NFL where the head referee has a beard, and that guy did not have a beard last year. All right, tell me who he's reffing next Friday.
Tell me which game. We're taking the under.
Because there were so many drives killed by their stupid bullshit flags and so many points left on that board i fuck them and fuck alex kemp again if i have to look up who the officiating crew is you know that i want to fist fight you and punch you in the neck and we get into this a little bit with deon later but the bills suck at hail mary's they're the worst hail mary team maybe in the history defensively yes yesly, probably the best of all time with Josh Allen. You'd think so.
And throw a Hail Mary from anywhere on the field. Yes.
But, yeah, on defense, they've given up three consecutive completions on Hail Marys, one of which was a push-off on Keenan Allen, which they did call. But still, like back-to-back catches on a Hail Mary, that's a tough look.
Yes, that is a tough look. And shout-out our newest member of the PMT crew, Cam.
Listen, it's tough to go sit in the gambling cave with us on a Sunday. It is really trial by fire, but I almost fucking bit his head off.
For what? Because the first Hail Mary, Keenan Allen had the most blatant push-off of all time and and he then took off his helmet and the guy the ref comes in and throws the flag and Cam's like no no the flag was for the helmet being taken off it's not for the push off and I was like shut the fuck up dude he pushed off then they call the push off he's like oh yeah you're right I was like god damn dude. Do not.
There's those crunch time witching hour moments where everyone has to have their head on a swivel and no wrong statements can be made.

And it's okay.

I'm not mad at him, but I was like, got to be better.

There were two refs that threw a flag, too, like right in front of me.

And it was the most blatant push-off ever.

It was the most blatant.

That was such a shitty ending to the game.

Yeah, it really was.

It really was. Fuck you, Anthony Lynch.
And there were like nine turnovers in the third and fourth quarters. Everyone hates you, dude.
All right. Panthers, Vikings.
Nice guy. Seems like a nice guy.
Yeah, I liked him on hard knocks. Seems like a nice guy.
He was good on Zoom. Yeah.
All right. Panthers, Vikings.
Vikings. Kirk Cousins with a game-winning drive.
Unbelievable. They come back and win a game where there was so much chaos going on in the witching hour.
I feel like this one almost slipped under the roof. We looked up and we're like, oh, shit, the Vikings are about to win? Well, it's because they started to fuck up in the fourth quarter.
Chad Beebe. Yeah, Chad Beebe.
And IU. Absolutely fucked some stuff up.
I will say this about Kirk Cousins. It takes me a lot to say this, but he's a fine quarterback.
That was a nice game-winning drive. Yeah.
He's played well at home. I did love, speaking of Madden, there was the Madden glitch to start the second half where Jeremy Chin, back-to-back plays, got a fumble for a touchdown.
That's one where you throw your controller through the TV and you're like, fuck this, this game is rigged. I really hope that he had something good for breakfast because every other game from now on you have to eat the exact same thing.
You have to copy whatever you did today that puts you in a position to get those two scooping scores. So I hope it was something hearty, something delicious, something that you're going to look forward to replicating every week.
So Jeremy Chin, so he scores back-to-back touchdowns and back-to-back plays, offensive snaps on fumble recoveries. The last guy to do it was 1948 Fred Dippy Evans.
And I went and tried to find what his nickname is from. I assumed it's just he threw in fucking huge hogs.
Yeah. Dippy.
But all I could find was this is a Fred Dippy Evans story that's quite something. Evans was considered shy but tough before a game against USC.
Bill Reardon, a teammate, poured a bucket of water over Evans' head. So it sounds like that's the first ice bucket challenge Evans tried to retaliate but crashed into a wall and split his knee open he concealed the injury from his coach and played in the USC game but needed 11 stitches afterward how do you conceal a bleeding out of his knee after his football career he owned a dry cleaning business.
Dippy. Dude, Dippy.
Dippy's just throwing

in fucking Copenhagen. How uncoordinated do you have

to be to run into a wall and split

your knee open? I can think of like nine different parts

of my body that would hit the wall before

my knee would if I was trying to retaliate against this.

Fred Dippy Evans. I couldn't find out

why they call him Dippy. The Dipper.

Fred Dippy Evans. Oh, I had a couple.

He had a bunch of nicknames. Dippy was probably

a code name for something that was weird back in the 50s. Maybe he invented Dippin' Dots.
Maybe he liked Anal. Yeah, he just dipped it in there.
Yeah, just get it dipped. His nicknames were Dippy, Dip, the Dipper, Fearless Fred.
That was probably because of the stitches. What a legend.
So Fred Dippy Evans. Shout out you, dude.
And the anal, probably. And the anal.
Big time anal guy. He actually was the one who introduced anal to the entire state of Ohio.
That's fascinating. And now he's like the Johnny Appleseed.
Wherever he goes. Everyone.
Fred's just plugging up butts. Yeah.
As soon as he got on the Browns, he's like, check this out. Watch this, boys.
You dip it in, and then you take it out. You know what they say? Dippy Evans.
You only die the last time somebody says your name. We just resurrected Fred Dippy Evans on this show.
Dude, Fred Dippy Evans is a legend. He literally invented anal.
I got the answer why he's Dippy. Anal? Anal.
Anal. It's anal, Jake.
It's a few sentences, so bear with me. Okay.
If it doesn't have anal in it, just cut this out. Just make something up that has anal in it.
It doesn't have anal. Well, no.

Jake, just say anal.

That's just a word.

It's a great place involved.

Oh, horseplay.

He went to Notre Dame.

He was among some fighting Irish players involved in horseplay at the dormitory. Okay, done.

That is literally anal.

Okay, so he's a strict Catholic.

Yeah, horseplay.

Yeah.

Because they probably were like, yo.

They were squirting water onto each other. No, they probably were like.
Yeah, exactly. Was it water or was it lube? We don't know.
No, they probably were like, yo, is Fred doing it? No, no, no, no. Is Fred doggy style? No, that's anal, bro.
You told the story wrong. What happened was there wasn't a teammate who dumped the water.
It was opposing players. What? Who dumped the water on him.
And then they shot him up with Novocaine that made him a little sedated and dippy. So kind of like ditzy because he was all shot up.
The opposing team kidnapped him, waterboarded him, and then shot him with truce. I'm reading it right now.
It says Bill Reardon, a teammate. The young men were squirting water onto each other as they ran through the building.
He hurt his knee like twice, I guess. Evan slipped on a wet spot.
He just was always doing water fights and hurting his knee? Yeah. What is this, like fucking the Betty Hill? So he kept shooting up with Novocaine.
Okay. All right.
I think we got it. It's the anal.
It's totally anal. Yeah, got it.
This is all got it. 100% anal.
But yeah, this was a good Kirk Cousins game. I still think he kind of stinks, but he's a fine quarterback.
I'm just still thinking about Dippy Evans.

It's actually big that they won it

without Thielen. Yes.

Well, Chad Beebe. Chad Beebe

is the new Thielen. After being the

goat, he went from the goat to the goat.

They keep sending

Joey Sly out. I was going to say, so Joey Sly,

shout out Joey Sly, this guy,

he has the worst job

in the world because the Panthers are

just good enough to always be in it

and then just bad enough to never get actually into field goal range.

So in the last six games, they have trotted him out there

to try to hit a game-tying or winning kick from 54 yards today,

67 yards against the Chiefs, and 65 yards against the Saints.

They basically are just like, dude, go out there, kicker, fail. Our offense cannot get into that line, field goal range.
We will never get there. So just go out there, kick it, and then we'll call it a day, hit the showers.
I don't even think they have a line that they put up when Joey Sly is on your team. Because you could attempt a field goal from literally anywhere on the field with Joey Sly.
I would not be shocked if he had the leg to make it through the end zone but missed by like 15 yards wide to the left. Oh, man.
So, Joey Sly, shout out. That's a terrible job that you have.
Also, really doing a good job. Not really.
You haven't had any of them. Jefferson, really good.
We benched him. You guys don't care about our fantasy team? I don't care about our fantasy team.
I don't even care about our fantasy team. But we benched him for, what's his name? Hinton.
For Kendall Hinton. We'll get to that.
BFD said he's going to go off. I was riding high off the news of Taysom Hill putting up numbers as a tight end last week.
I was like, I figured out a way to hack the system. Now we have a wide receiver who's also a quarterback.
He said Kendall Hinton is going to go off. Alright, next up we have Raiders Falcons.
Just when we started to give the Raiders credit and start taking them for real, they go and drop an absolute fucking egg in Atlanta. I don't know.
I mean, here's a positive. I'll say something nice, Raiders fans.

Nathan Peterman had five pass attempts,

and he didn't throw an interception.

He completed three of them, I think.

Yep, three for five.

So the game ended with Nathan Peterman

and Matt Schaub on the field.

Beautiful.

Going back and forth.

Just how they drew it up.

And it stinks because we don't get a pick six.

With those two guys playing against each other,

and you don't get a pick six,

it's like seeing porn stars with their clothes on

in the same room as each other.

Like at the AVians when they get up to accept a warrant you keep hoping that someone's going to take their shirt off yeah like it's like oh there's johnny sins and uh and madison ivy on the red carpet one of them is going to get their pants off soon nope and we didn't get to see a pick six but matt schaub did get a a quarterback save. So he has one save on the year behind Jameis Winston's two.

The Raiders, this is just a huge step back.

I guess the actual spin zone here is the Raiders were so bad that you can just throw out the game tape.

Like you weren't even remotely in this game.

It was never a question.

You looked flat from the beginning. And Derek Carr, we'll talk about this with Dion but little hands little tiny little hands Derek Carr if you don't think little hands matter if you don't think hand size matter Derek Carr has played 105 games in the NFL he has 63 fumbles and he's lost 31 of them pathetic that is insane and what's almost worse is now he's got that meme that follows him around every time he does something bad the the clip from last sunday night where he's just like staring at the camera looking like jared goth and he's just looking like he's gonna start crying his eyeliner off his face and so every time he does something bad it's like boom that pops up on the timeline uh what happens now i saw derrick carr's brother not uh david the other the third brother tweeted on sunday night last sunday night when they were playing the Chiefs, I kept a list and I'll be like calling these people out.
What do you do now? What do you do after this game? Well, he's on good news for everybody that made fun of Derek Carr last week. His brother is on your list.
Yeah. I mean, like I told you so.
I told you this guy stunk. That was a bad, bad game.
I mean, the Raiders defense defense is just bad. Derek Carr is a big blocker on Twitter, too.
I believe it. He's like the Ben Roethlisberger.
I believe it. He ran his own account.
Seems like his wife might run his account and just block everyone. Probably.
That seems, he seems like a, here, honey, have all my passwords type of dude. Derek Carr.
Oh, he doesn't block me. How about that? Let's share, let's share, let me see.
Let's share a, you know, an email. He shares an email address with his wife.
An answering machine message. That's definitely.
He doesn't block me. All right.
Cool. I'm going to follow your ass, Derek Carr.
I'm going to follow your fucking ass. If you're Derek Carr, it's got to be so much worse to get benched for Nathan Peterman than for Marcus Mariota, right? Correct.
I would much rather see Mariota come in off the sidelines and be like, they're going with this guy. I forgot he did, too.
Put that in a Google calendar, Jake. January 17th for remember Marcus Mariota.
Yeah, see if he's alive. It's my sister's birthday.
There we go. Happy birthday.
Shout out to Matty. Remember Marcus Mariota on that day.
Is that a Tuesday or Wednesday? What is it? I don't know why I only gave two options. It's a Sunday or Wednesday.
Sunday, we'll be here. So, actually, sorry, no offense to your sister, Hank, but let's move it back.
Yep. Actually, let's go to the following Wednesday.
It seems like a Tuesday. Tuesday.
It seems like a Tuesday type for a Wednesday show. Wednesday is inauguration day.
Tuesday is the 19th. Oh, yeah.
We're really going to have a lot to talk about. I'm going to be busy on that one.
I'm just looking at my Apple calendar and I had a dot. Are you saying the election is official? We're not talking about it.
Okay. All right.
Well, I'm just saying. Who said it pops up? You know how the holidays pop up on your Apple calendar? That's what came up.

He didn't say who was getting inaugurated.

Yeah.

That's true.

Yeah.

That's a good point.

Yeah.

That's a good point.

All right.

So put it in.

That's Marcus Mariota.

Big Joe Jordan.

Do you get inaugurated if you win?

You get re-inaugurated.

Oh.

Yeah.

You like double.

You pinky swear on the Bible.

Mm-hmm.

Fun fact.

JPP could never.

Remember Marcus Mariota day.

Got it.

Okay.

On part of my take.

Hank is furious over here.

Hank, explain to me why you're just screaming at the.

Thank you. Remember Marcus Mariota day Got it Hank is furious over here Hank explain to me Why you're just screaming at the television I have the second half under 21 and a half there's 21 points currently And the Packers just dropped An interception in the end zone Yes they did So Mitch is going to fuck you There's four guys and only three defenders That should be only three defenders.
I think the Bears are going to score. That should be a touchdown.
David Montgomery. David Montgomery.
They can't stop him. The game.
The catch. The game, the run, the catch, everything.
Wow, what a beast. All right, so the – oh, they're going for two.
Let's go. They're going for two.
There's no quit in this team. Big cat.
He's done the math. Matt Nagy has done the math.
Chart says when you're down by 18, you've got to go for You gotta go for two, yeah. We'll only be down 16.
And Billy's teaser's alive. Everyone wins.
Look at this, Billy, your teaser's alive. I shudder to think what the spreadsheet looks like incorporating teasers.
I'm just saying it right now. The Bears now have, they're gonna be up 13-0 in the fourth quarter.
That's kind of a slaughter. That's kind of a slaughter.
All right, live for this two-point conversion. Does this matter, Hank? Oh, it doesn't? No.
Okay. All right, so the two-point conversion doesn't matter.
Matt Nagy drew up his best play, and it worked. Very nice.
Wow. 16.
I'm going to tweet the eyeball emojis. You know what? You guys are just going to run out of time in this one again.
Yep. I'm going to tweet the eyeball emojis real quick.
That going to run out of time in this one again I'm going to tweet the eyeball emojis real quick That one's going to feel good Billy, so have you started working on your teaser spreadsheet? Yeah, after the success of this week's Can't Win Parlay Honestly, it's probably the most successful Shout out you, dude I'm sorry for hating on it Dude, it's working, we perfected it You. You killed it.
You perfected it. It won on a $100 bet.
It won $124. When you open up the spreadsheet for the first time and you're putting the formulas in, do you get Clippy, the Microsoft Office logo pop up and be like, hey, looks like you're going to spend all your money.
Looks like you should throw your computer into a lake. It worked.
I mean, it worked. It worked.
I mean, as Buster once said, the only difference between a fool and a visionary is success, and we have success. That is something Buster said.
So you're calling yourself a visionary. Mission accomplished.
Mission accomplished. So actually check it out because we're going to do next week, and it's up for the year.
This would be hilarious if the Bears somehow covered this spread. They could.
All right, let's go to – oh, yeah, the Falcons. Good job.
Every year is the same now for the Falcons. They suck, and then they get an interim head coach.
Or, I mean, I counted Dan Quinn after the bye as an interim head coach last year, and they put together some wins, and everyone says, why are the Falcons so bad? They have such a good roster. And then next year we're going to be like, oh, you know who we should look out for? The Falcons.
I look at the Falcons as a bad job. If I'm a coach that's looking at my pick of the litter next year, I don't think I would go to Atlanta.
It is cursed. I would not.
It is cursed. All right.
Let's go to Cardinals-Patriots. Hank, are you back in? Sort of.
I'm rooting for a game cancellation, which would then add the extra two teams, or what is it, four teams to the playoffs? No, it would be eight. Eight full teams, so one extra team.
One extra team. I'm rooting for a game cancellation.
Like this Steelers-Ravens game. You got your eyes on it.
I got my eyes on it. You got it on the tickler.
One cancellation equals Pats are back. If there's one coach in the NFL that would like knowingly infect his staff.
Stairway to seven. I think it would be Belichick.
Yeah. Yeah, I'd agree.
All right, so Cam Newton won this game. Nine for 18, 84 yards, two interceptions.
That's remarkable. He drew a big personal foul.
You believe all these teams passed on Cam? He had a 13 passer rating in the first half. This is just a testament.
Remember I told you this take a few weeks ago. I do think it's coming.
Is this Bill Belichick's best coaching job? It might be. You know what? This actually is Bill Belichick's best coaching job.
I mean, his defense has stunk, but he shut down Kyler Murray. Right.
And offensive guru, Cliff Kingsbury. Dude, football genius Cliff Kingsbury was not able to score more than 10 points against this team.
And it should have been worse because they got that flag on the crackback block on the punt return by Gunner. Yep.
The phantom call, which it still doesn't make any sense to me. I don't know if it was the right call or the wrong call, but it looked as just somebody who was watching football like a normal football play.
It was completely normal. Blocked this other person.
And they looked at each other in their faces. And then if that's a penalty, they should just, every team should have one floppy nerd that they send out on kick returns to just get blocked into the dirt and have it look like a penalty.
And then the refs will just call it because I think that's what half of penalty calls in the NFL are now. It's just like, does that look like it should be a penalty? Yeah, does that guy look like he's hurt? Yeah.
Okay, flat. I mean, with the Cam Newton penalty at the end of the game, it was kind of like that too where it looked like it was a penalty, but I don't necessarily think that it even was a penalty.
I agree. He was in bounds and he was a runner.
I agree. What were you going to say? It's nature.
Body craves contact. Body does crave contact.
Is Cliff Kingsbury a good coach? No. When I call him an offensive genius and a guru, I'm not saying that seriously.
Tongue in cheek. Yes.
He, yeah, this is, the Cardinals are now one Hail Mary away from a four-game losing streak. Like, they haven't been playing good, right? And they do have a ton of talent, and so what's going on? I don't know.
I feel like we've anointed him a little, maybe not us personally, because we've been calling him a mimbo and saying that he just wants to get sucked off going home from P.F. Changs.
But still, it does feel like Cliff Kingsbury, I don't know, not that good of a coach. I don't think he is.
Yeah. It is crazy.
And he's not that hot. He's not that hot.
It is crazy how bad the Patriots defense played well. That goal line stand to end the first half.
It's crazy, though, how bad both quarterbacks played. And this game was one of those games that Red Zone forgot about it.
We didn't see it much. It didn't seem very good.
But the Patriots, I think the Patriots are going to do this. They're just going to go back and forth like this.
I think Belichick likes playing against a quarterback who's a challenge like Kyler Murray. Yeah.
He gets up for it. He gets into the real weird shit on defense when it's an enigma that he has to solve.
You know, like he can only force himself to be so creative after 20-some years coaching if he's going up against like a traditional pocket passer. Right.
It's like Phillip Rivers again. He's like, oh, Jesus, I got to fucking figure out a way to pick this guy off three times again in the fourth quarter.
But when it's a guy like Kyler Murray who presents a challenge to him, that wakes him up out of his little football coma.

Yeah, the Patriots are going to lose to the Chargers next weekend

and they'll beat the Rams the week after.

Everybody, what's going on?

I think they're going to win out.

They're going to win out?

I just think they're going to go back and forth like this.

They're going to one game back, one game forth,

just go back and forth.

What do you make of them?

We don't know.

Because that Texans loss still makes no sense. Yeah.
All right. Let's see.
Yeah, and the Cardinals, I don't know what to make of the Cardinals. I think they stink.
I'm now in the Cardinals stink. I'm sick of hearing about the Cardinals and being like, I think they're soft.
If Kyler Murray and Cliff Kingsbury put it all together, I think they stink. I think they're not going to make the playoffs, even though that's kind of hard to do looking at how bad the NFC East.
The NFC East has changed the entire playoff picture. They have brought everyone to their level.
Yeah, that's what we do. Because it just eliminates the entire – We're like quicksand, baby.
It eliminates four full teams. And so when you look at the rest of the playoff picture, you're like, well, where are we going to find the other teams? I think the Cardinals should only play games against the NFC West.
They're so fun when they play the Rams. It's true.
The Seahawks. It is true.
The 49ers. Hank, do you need this at all or no? No.
Okay. You're out? Yeah.
You're out. All right.
All right. Next up, let's do it.
Dolphins versus the Jets. Billy, you're out now.

So the quote was, with Sam Darnold and his three dudes at receiver,

Adam Gase said this is a chance for everyone to see what maybe it could have been.

He said that this past week, talking about Sam Darnold getting healthy,

the three dudes at receiver getting healthy.

The final stat line is 16 for 27, 197 yards. We'll always just look back and think, man, how great could we have been if everybody was just healthy? Yeah, two interceptions.
Didn't get mono. Three points.
We could have had this. This could have all been ours.
Three points. Everyone healthy.
Hyper drive. Three points.
sam gdarnold afterwards said still super confident in adam gaze i don't know why is he saying that because he i think i think now everyone realizes they're all hitching their their uh wagon to adam gaze staying as the coach for the rest of the year because they want to complete the tank so joe douglas wants to tank, get Trevor Lawrence. Sam Darnold wants to complete the tank, get Trevor Lawrence, so he can then go somewhere else that's not the Jets.
People are like, ooh, he's going to go back up Big Ben in Pittsburgh. That would be the greatest thing to ever happen to Sam Darnold's career.
But I think he wants to stay. No, I know.
I think he knows. I think he knows.
Get me out of here. So if I'm Sam Darnold, I'm probably doing the exact same thing where you have to act like you have Adam Gase's back for the rest of the year.
Because if you don't, if you publicly go against him and he continues to be the head coach, then there's a chance. It's a small chance, but there's a chance that the front office looks at the problem at the end of the year and figures like one of these guys has to and they take a side one way or the other.
Now, I guess if you're Sam Darnold, you could say like, yeah, if they want to point all their fingers at me and get rid of me and keep Adam Gase, that's great because I'll probably come back and beat Adam Gase as a coach of the New York Jets eventually. But I don't know.
I feel like you just got to pretend to have his back. but I think what he's doing is he's like playing mom and dad off each other a little bit because Gase was saying that,

you know,

he gave up play calling,

took it back. But I think what he's doing is he's like playing mom and dad off each other a little bit because Gase was saying that, you know, he gave up play calling, took it back.
Then there was a report that he gave it up again. But then their offensive coordinator said that he wasn't calling the plays.
And then after the game, Gase had to like he had to explain that, yes, he was still involved in the play calling. Yeah, this is Dow Loggins and Adam Gase have done this in Chicago.
They did this in Miami. Now they're doing it with the Jets.
This is like his just traveling band of idiots that keep getting jobs. I want to see Adam Gase get another job.
I wouldn't even be shocked if he does. I would love to see the Jets extend Adam Gase.
Yeah. How great would that be? It would be incredible.
Hey, spin zone for Jets fans, at least Stephen Cohen is the owner of the Mets right now. Yeah, there you go.
So, you're good to go. Alright, and also, I'm happy for Ryan Fitzpatrick, because he came back and he played well, and he got a win, and that's cool.
For Fitzy. You know what? It just dawned on me.
Here's why Adam Gase can't remember whether or not he's actually calling the plays or not, because he can't remember what he leaked to Manish Mehta as a lie in the New york daily news right he can't keep his lies straight at this right and all his grudges straight i agree so like if the report comes out that he accidentally confirms that was originally a lie to try to fuck over a reporter who sucks then he looks like a liar in front of the press afterwards so i kind of sympathize with that yes yes it's a the jets are just full-on just keep losing just keep losing i don't think there's a jets fan that isn't happy about these losses like they're they just want to keep losing there's no maybe fireman ed there's always one crazy who's like oh like we're gonna win this game all right the packers are kneeling and they brought out rogers to kneel it in our face finals 41 25 that fucking sucked a lot and it wasn't that close. But the run.
We will always have the run. All right.
Dolphins Jets. So that's Dolphins Jets.
Good on the Dolphins. They're still rolling.
They have the Bengals next week. Then they have like a gauntlet coming up.
We'll find out how good they actually are. I think Tua might miss some time.
I think Tua might miss some time. I don't know if that's a bad thing.
So is Tua officially hurt? Yes. I believe so.
Also, Frank Gore had 21 carries. Yeah.
That's ridiculous. It is insane.
He's going to – Frank Gore might take his son's job as a starting running back in three years. He had 21 carries.
He's fucking – Oh, love this. They're diving at it afterwards.
Love this. The old Greg Sciano.
Yeah. A little old black and blue.
There we go. AFC North football.
Get them. Get them.
Man, that was fun. Good fight, defense.
Way to fight at the end there after the game is over. All right.
Let's go to Browns-Jaguars. The Browns.
The Cleveland Browns, the Cleveland Browns are not going to have a losing season for the first time since 2007. That's good for them.
Unbelievable. And they're good, and they're going to make the playoffs.
They're going to make the playoffs. The Browns are a good football team.
They won't have a losing record for the first time since 2007. That's huge.
That's a crazy stat. Everyone should be rooting for the Browns.

How do you not have one season?

If you don't have a dog in the fight.

It's good to see a team finally make their fan base happy after a long time.

A Browns playoff game will be must-watch television.

What do you say, Billy?

Quick question for you guys.

Yeah.

Where do you put the Browns next to the Raiders or the Falcons,

two teams that you said you don't know are good or bad? What's the weather? Yeah, give us the weather. Give us a forecast.
Playoff stretch type weather. Okay, so cold.
Browns. Throw in a dome.
It's cold, but it's in a dome. Is it cold inside the dome? Let's say cold game.
Okay, so it's a 40-degree game inside of a dome for some reason.

I'd take the Browns.

The Browns and the Raiders are actually very similar teams.

Derek Carr's better than Baker Mayfield,

but the Raiders don't have Miles Garrett.

That's pretty much how you'd sum it up in my mind.

They both can run the football.

They're kind of similarly built,

except the Raiders' defense has no one, and the browns defense has like a top five defensive player so that changes things and a dude who smashes people with his helmet i think they're actually very similar even like baker and david carr are similar quarterbacks baker in that okay baker baker played well but he had a couple throws he had a couple touchdowns that he should have had that were very easy that he did not complete. But, I mean, when you go to Derek Carr, he makes some boneheaded mistakes too.
Not even the touchdown throw that he missed, that fourth down throw or third down throw where they could have just won the game right there and they couldn't fucking get it. Like, the Jaguars were spunky.
What did Mike Francesca say? They're the best one in ten team he's ever seen so so he said they are the Jacksonville Jaguars are the best one in ten team of all time that's in the history of the NFL and so we had Jake look up who the other one in ten teams are yeah there's six teams debate in the last decade because this is this is a great take by Francesa do you want to start earlier or most recent most recent 2017. 2017 49ers.
That's Chip Kelly. 2016 49ers.
That's Tom Sula. They were good.
They won their first game. 2014 Jaguars.
Blake Bortles. No, before Blake.
No, that was his rookie year. Oh, it was? Shit.
Yeah. 2014 Raiders.
The Jaguars have two of the top four. What? 2014 Raiders.
No. 2012 Chief chiefs i couldn't tell you the quarterbacks on any of these that might have been uh brody croil yeah and then 2010 panthers oh no that no you know who that was it was um wait what is it 20 what 2012 chiefs oh was that tyler palco dude tyler palco with his hail mary against the bears yeah fuck yeah that was a pretty good 1-10 team.
Yeah. 2010 Panthers.
They finished 2-14. I assume they used the first pick to get Cam the year after.
Okay. Tyler Palco.
I'm going to say. Fuck that guy.
I'm going to say number one was the 2014 Jaguars because they were just rebuilding to come up and almost win the AFC Championship game in a couple years. That was not Tyler Palco.
It was not? No. Because they didn't play the Bears that year.
I remember Tyler Palco. Oh, Orton was on that team.
Okay. This is, yeah.
All right, who was the other teams? That wasn't the Tyler Palco game. I think that Brady Quinn was the starter.
2010 Panthers. 2010 Panthers.
Who was that? 2010. This is terrible that we're doing this.
Oh, that was, what's his name? Matt Bark Jimmy Clawson Jimmy Clawson yeah and what's his name still has to retire Todd McShare or Mel Kuyper yeah he still has to retire he said Jimmy Clawson was going to be so those yeah so the Jaguars this year are the 7th 1-10 team in the last second so the bottom the bottom line is the Jaguars have a 1-10 dynasty in the last 10 years. We can figure this out.
What did those teams end up? Stand by. Okay.
Because that would be the easiest way to figure it out, right? Yep. Like if one of those teams ended up 4-12, they have to be the best team.
The Kansas City was 2-14. They were 2-14, yep.
All right, so that's an interesting debate. Where did you think you'd get that type of debate? Nowhere else.
Sports Pope. Yep.
Great fucking debate. The 2017-49ers ended a season winning five in a row.
There you go. They finished 6-10.
All right, so you're wrong, Mike Princess. They started 1-10 and finished 6-10.
You are wrong, Mike Princess. That's the best 1-10 team of all time.
2017-49. I don't think it's impossible for a team to be better than that.
You can't. You cannot be a better 1-10 team.
Yeah. All right.
So there we go. They beat the Bears, Texas Titans, Jaguars, and the Bears.
What year was that? 2017. It was C.J.
Beathard, Brian Hoyer, and Jimmy G. No way.
Jimmy G was on with that? Oh, that was Shanahan's. Was that his first year? Shanahan was head coach.
Yeah, that was his first year when he was starting to put it all together. I actually remember that.
Oh, my God. That team – That Bears 49ers game was in the snow.
It was so fucking bad. It was 15-14 the final.
Yeah, it was so bad. I bet you you can go back in time to old part of my takes and listen to us talk about that 49ers team.
I think at the time we were even saying this is a good, shitty team. Yeah.
Because that's the year that they played the Rams in a Thursday night football game that everybody thought was going to suck. And it ended up being a shootout.
We were like, damn, this team's really good for you. So yeah, Mike Francesa doesn't always talk about it.
You're wrong, Mike Francesa. Did Garoppolo take over at the back end of the season? What a debate.
Yeah, wow. Wow, that was fun.
Are we actually doing sports now? Yeah. Yeah, no, I mean, well, that was a great thought starter.
One of the best 1 in 10 teams of all time. Yeah, that game, oh, fuck, I remember that game.
Everyone was slipping around. That game sucked.
All right, let's see. Where are we? Oh, Browns-Jaguars.
Mike Lennon wasn't terrible. He was pretty bad.
He was pretty bad, but he looked like he had played quarterback before, whereas Jake Lutton, maybe not.

And then after the game, they fired Dave Caldwell, their general manager, which can't be a comforting

thing for Doug Marone to go home and read reports about.

No, I think Dougie knows.

But Dougie's cool with it.

He knew at the start.

He's cool with it.

This is how it's going to go.

It's actually kind of nice that they're letting him do it.

Why did they fire him right now?

I guess they want to hire a new guy to look for the next Doug. Yeah, fresh blood, too.
That feels good. Yeah, they want the first pick where everyone was going to want to go to the Jaguars.
Also, credit to Jarvis Landry. I feel like Jarvis Landry sometimes gets lumped in with Odell Beckham.
But Jarvis Landry, going back to, remember Hard Knocks, when he talked about changing the culture? I mean, he had a huge game. He's a dependable guy.
He has changed the culture in Cleveland. So he should get a shout-out for that.
Cleveland, again, they're 8-3. What else can you say? They're an 8-3 football team in Cleveland.
You should be extremely happy about that. It is also fucking awesome watching Nick Chubb when he gets a block and you're just like, oh, here he goes.
Some teams just make running the ball sexy. The Browns are one of those teams.
Yeah, it's because they've got a beast offensive line coach. Turns you on.
Wait, he's not the offensive line coach anymore. No, Bill Callahan.
Oh, I thought you were talking about, what's his name? Oh, no, no, no. Tony Wiley.
Yeah, yeah. No.
Fuck. What can we think? Bob Wiley.
Bob Wiley. Bob Wiley.
Bob Wiley. Yeah, yeah.
Bill Callahan is the best offensive line coach in the NFL, and he is the Browns head coach. Yes.
Or the Browns offensive line coach. All right, before we get to our next game, we're going to get right back to the show.
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All right, back to part of my take. Okay, I'm hearing a report right now that Aaron Rodgers is back to doing his southern accent after the game.
I don't know why he picked that up, where he picked that up from. If it's a Danica Patrick thing where he wanted to sound like a NASCAR driver for.
Gross. Gave up the run.
Saints-Broncos. Kendall Hinton.
One for nine, 13 yards. That sucked.
I don't know why the NFL did that to them. I don't know why we can move all these games and they don't move this game.
That sucked. But here's something, and I don't want to be mean to Ryan Leaf.
He has been on this show before. But Kendall Hinton, that wasn't the worst performance.
Ryan Leaf had a game in 1998 where he went 1 for 15 for four yards. And Kendall went, what, one for? Nine for 13 yards.
But he had more interception yards than passing yards, and he had twice as many interceptions as he did completions. He had one completion today.
This game was essentially, if you ever wondered, like, hey, what would it look like if army and navy played with nfl uniforms on

well this was the game for you it was kind of like that 77 runs 77 runs and taysom hill was nine for 16 for 78 yards so less than 100 yards passing total and 77 runs yeah it was tough and then billy was saying that if we got into it billy you were saying that you could do better than than Hinton.

No, I mean,

it's not true.

No, if there was like,

like, you know what, we're going to do what we do. Dude, even the pop pass so he can get a completion.
Yeah, it would look like it. Play action.
I mean, Dugues, the intern for Barstool Betts, he was saying, yeah, I was a play action quarterback in high school. So I was like, so you're just hitting wide open receivers in short yards? yards? You burned them.
Yeah, so I was like, why didn't they do that type of stuff? Well, because I mean, they didn't actually think that he was going to throw. He only threw it nine times.
But, like, they could have, well, yeah. They ran the army off, but Billy, what I'm saying...
They threw it when they had to throw it. So, Billy thinks that he could complete a bunch of, like, screens, checkdowns, some crossing routes, some unders.
The thing is, I think that me and Big Cat could actually be a better NFL quarterback right now than you would right now. Because you are good enough to think that you can complete passes.
Me and Big Cat would not even try to complete a pass. No.
We would just self-sack, just run backwards. I would just do shovel passes.

Yeah, maybe a pop pass here and there.

I might punt.

Matt Ryan did a two-handed shovel pass today.

I'd do that.

Can I say I did not appreciate the Tim Tebow slander.

Oh, the Broncos have played before without a quarterback before.

Yeah, that's true.

All the Big J's thought they were being clever.

Oh, who?

Did Sissana make that joke?

I don't think so.

Everybody made that joke. I saw a handful of people.
Everyone did. You know what Elway thought about playing for a second? Well, they tried to get a coach to play.
They tried to get a coach. They should have let their quality control wide receivers coach or whatever, they should have let him try to get in.
Bortles, the bottom line is Blake Bortles should have been in a bubble this entire time. Correct.
Like we suggested before the season even started. Yes.
This is why you sign a Blake Bortles. Of course, if you have him in your facility, he's a social butterfly.
Everybody loves him. He's going to be, if one person in your facility has COVID or tests positive, you know that Blake's going to get it because he's everyone's best friend.
It's not his fault. So you need to just keep him isolated, keep him in a bubble.
He would have gone out there and probably beat the Saints. Yeah.
This game was crazy, though. I mean, it is nuts that they can move all these games, and then the Broncos don't have a quarterback, and they're like, yep, we're going to play.
Under the rules, we're going to play. It is.
It's insane that they are playing this game when they've backed up other games beforehand. And the NFL just needs to know that when it comes to every quarterback being out, I know you have a protocol.
And a protocol, as far as I know, is just a rule to limit things that dumb people think that you should do. But there should be an exception when your entire quarterback room is tested positive or they're being isolated.
And you should be allowed to bring in a Swag Kelly for a game. You should be allowed to bring back a Tim Tebow.
Yes. Just give us something that we want to see to make it more interesting than having Kendall Hinton go out there and just like, I mean, he wasn't even, he wasn't even good enough to be a starting quarterback at Wake Forest.
No, dude, you know what they should actually do? They should have Eli Manning in a bubble for the entire year. And he's all time quarterback.
If you need him, he's him he's there yeah that would be awesome who wouldn't want to see Eli go back out there for one more game I would love to be like Eli none of your bad stats count against you all your good stats count so like literally past completions count incompletions don't interceptions don't touchdowns do I like before the game that the the team twitter account was like let's go out there and have fun today broncos unbelievable i mean it's unbelievable it's yeah it's crazy real football guys don't enjoy having fun it's crazy you know what you know what's fun making somebody else not have fun yeah um so the saints are are also though like uh you can't judge them off this game but they are peaking at the right time tasem hill uh is doing a good good job in Drew Brees' absence. I have a stat for you, PFT.
I hate to say this stat. Some people will say I'm being biased.
Some people will say I have an ax to grind. This is just a stat though.
Statistics don't lie. Would you say that? I'd say numbers never lie.
Numbers never lie. So my stat is simple.
Drew Brees has missed seven games in the last two years. The Broncos are, or sorry, the Saints are 7-0, but more importantly, they are 7-0 against the spread.
But the Saints don't lose against the spread in October. Well, they are 7-0 against the spread without Drew Breeze.
Okay. I'm just saying.
I'm just saying. Seems like they're pretty good when Drew Brees isn't out there.
When he has a shoulder injury. Ribs.
When he has a shoulder injury. All his ribs.
He just broke another rib. Yep.
Thoughts and prayers. Just another one.
After the game, Vic Fangio said, I was disappointed on several levels that our QBs put us in that position, that our QBs put the league in that position. We counted them to be leaders of our team, the leaders of our offense,

and those guys made a mistake.

Well, it was Jeff Druskell who did this, right?

Jeff Druskell, Drew Locke.

Who else?

I mean, Blake.

No, it wasn't Blake.

Blake was doing his job.

Yeah, it wasn't his fault.

It was not his fault.

Oh, Rippon, that Rippon guy.

Yeah, Rippon. That beat the Jets.

Way to go, Rippon.

Fucking ruined it for everyone. All right, game 49ers Rams Kyle Shanahan owns Sean McVay four in a row against Sean McVay sweep this year uh when he's got no one to play I Kyle Shanahan is such a good fucking coach like the fact that the 49ers actually could make the playoffs and It's a long shot.
They're 5-6. But Kyle Shanahan is such a good fucking coach like the fact that the 49ers actually could make the playoffs it's a long shot they're 5-6 but Kyle Shanahan is such a goddamn good coach he has them ready to go scheming them up he's got a million injuries a million different running backs different quarterbacks different secondary doesn't matter they're competitive and he owns Sean McVay even when they're they look good.
They look like they've got that spark there. Yes.
So, yeah, Kyle Shanahan, great offensive coach, great. I mean, for some reason, his defense also plays exceedingly.
It might be like complimentary football at times, but I thought when Richard Sherman went to San Francisco, I thought, okay, he's going to be washed up, and he was playing on that prove-it deal that he wrote for himself on the back of a napkin. Even Richard Sherman has played pretty decently.
I actually wrote down Robert Sala. Now is the time that we start talking about him again.
I know hiring defensive coordinators isn't cool anymore. But Robert Sala, let me tell you something that is cool.
He's on the top of my list of dudes that will headbutt one of his players

after a big play while they're wearing their helmet.

He's up there. He's a fucking

jacked up type of guy.

You know what he brings is he brings the juice.

He brings the juice. Bring your own guts.

There will be

a head coach or a general manager that

looks to go the defensive route this

offseason and they should hire Salah.

I think that he's clearly the best defense coordinator.

And I don't know what to make.

The Rams offense

This is one of the best defense coordinator. And I don't know what to make.
The Rams' offense, when it doesn't work, just falls apart. And then Aaron Donald, this is why Aaron Donald is Aaron Donald, is the Rams' offense was bad today, and then all in a two-minute stretch, Aaron Donald basically changes the game with a hit, forced fumble, touchdown, and then a sack on the next drive that leads to a touchdown.
That's why he's Aaron Donald. He can actually just completely change a game in two minutes from his position.
And when you have a great tackle blocking him, sometimes it looks like it's a tight end trying to block Aaron Donald. Yes.
He's just a terrifying player to go one up against. So I guess this was kind of a, not a to-be-expected,

but it does make sense.

Like, the Rams lost to a division opponent off of a big win.

Do you think, like, is there any shine coming off the Rams as a dark horse they could contend?

The NFC is so fucking wide open.

I think, no, so I don't even look at this as that much of a knock

against the Rams because the 49ers are a really well-coached team. And they're 4-2 on the road.
Sean McVay's going to be so scared to just reply to any of Kyle Shanahan's texts or talk to him. He's stealing something from me.
Yeah, maybe he's got, like, he's actually tapped you. He's got you tapped.
He's got your house tapped. All right, finally, we'll get to Deion, and then we'll finish up with some football guy of the week and some baby brawn.
Chiefs, Bucs, hoo boy. Patrick Mahomes, turns out he's pretty fucking good.
It's still the first quarter of that game right now. It lasted so long.
Tyreek Hill had like 200 yards receiving in the first quarter. Could not be stopped.
I think he had like 60 fancy points in the first quarter. It was insane what they were doing.
Tony Romo started to joke around saying that Tyreek Hill could have 1,000 yards receiving in a game. I actually think that Patrick Mahomes could throw 4,000 yards over the course of a game.
That might be a different conversation, but I actually think that it could be done. Yes.
I actually agree with you. I hate to do this to myself, but Patrick Mahomes had 359 yards passing in the first half.
The Chicago Bears have had that once in a game since 2015. Yeah.
That's fucking stupid. And he makes it look easy.
He makes it look so easy. Big Cat, do you think that you could throw a football 1,000 yards during the course of an NFL game? So I'm saying, like, as this game is going on, you're out on a football field on your own.
But you can only throw the football while the clock's running in the game. Yes.
1,000 yards. Yeah.
That's – I mean, you could – Wait, do you have to go get it? Yeah, yeah. yeah.
You have to throw it. So you'd have to go.
You'd throw the ball like 20 yards. Then you'd jog up to the ball, get the ball, throw it 20 more yards, and keep going like that.
Yeah, dude. You're not doing the math right.
That's 33 throws. 20 yards.
33 throws. No, 30 yards.
I can throw 30. 30 yards.
You can throw farther than 20. 30 yards.
That's not fair. With running? Yeah.
You absolutely could do that. Without a doubt.
You get so tired. No way.
Without a doubt. Here's actually a crazy stat.
What are you talking about? That's like, how many game minutes are there in an NFL game? There are 60. No, no, I know, but you're saying actually while the clock's running or are you saying while there's action? Because you know how there's a stat.
So then there's 11 minutes. Yeah, so that's what I was talking about.
Okay, that's what you're talking about. During plays.
Yes. Still could do it.
I don't know. Yeah.
Yes. That would be an interesting test.
Now here's a fun stat. Do you know who has the most passing yards ever in an NFL game? Bless you, Billy.
Who? Norm Van Brocklin. Ooh.
Yeah, it sounded like Brocklin. In 1951, he had 554 yards.
That's the record? It's crazy that that record has not been broken. Wait, what? Yeah.
How is that the record? I thought someone had it. Really? Yeah.
They probably burned him at the stake after that game in 1951 as a witch.

He was playing against a bunch of white defensive backs,

so it was probably really easy.

554 is the record?

I never would have guessed that.

That feels crazy.

Matt Schaub had 527 yards.

1951.

Alaska and Hawaii weren't even states, and that's when the NFL passing record was was. Derek Carr has 513 yards.
I want to see tape from that game. You break it down.
All 22. Yeah.
What do you make of the Bucs though? Because they are now, they went 6-2 and now they're 1-3. And I'm not going to put it all on Antonio Brown, but they're 1-3 since they brought in Antonio Brown.
I mean, again's, again, that's just a stat. Gronk looks good.
Tom Brady, like, it alternates plays for him sometimes. He can look like the worst quarterback in the league on one play and then like a top five guy on the very next one.
Well, do you know, it's, is it, like, it's Bruce Arians. Bruce Arians' offense, they throw picks.
I don't know. I just, it's crazy to me that you got Tom Brady.
You have a championship window. You have all these guys.
Why wouldn't you let Tom Brady just be Tom Brady? Just be like, Tom Brady, you run the offense. You know the offense.
Let's stop going deep all the time. Just fucking let's do it.
Let's run the offense. That would make a lot more sense.
Make a lot of sense. I'd feel a lot better about the Bucs' chances if that were the case, but it's not the case.
Bruce Arians, like everyone who plays for Bruce Arians throws interceptions. That's just how it goes.
Especially in year one, right? Year one is the interception year where you get it all out of your system. So, yeah, I mean, I don't trust the Bucs.
I don't. It seems like they're running out of time to figure it out.
You know what I mean? Like one of those teams where you keep saying to yourself, oh, they'll figure it out. They'll get it together.
They'll figure it out, and it's just not going to happen. I do want to put one in Tyran Matthews' ear hole, though.
Okay. I love Tyran Matthews.
I'm a big honey badger guy. Okay.
He's one of the most electric players to watch on defense. Has a nose for the football.
He had an interception today, and he slid instead of getting tackled by Tom Brady.

He slid at Tom Brady's feet.

Made a move.

I don't know if that was showing respect for Tom Brady.

It was the third quarter.

No, you can't do that.

You've got to try to truck stick Tom Brady.

You have to.

You have to.

There's no excuse for that.

Yeah, and the Chiefs are starting to round in a form at the perfect time.

Are they going to go 15-1?

Are they going to go 15-1? Maybe. Broncos win at dolphins probably win oh saints at saints week 15 is that will be back for that one game well if he is then the saints will lose yeah and if he isn't good job i i actually think that the dolphins might beat him i don't know don't know.
The Chiefs, they just, the Chiefs are one of those teams now where, and it was weird. This game was actually weird because it felt like they were going to win by 100 and then they let the Bucs come all the way back in.
Shout out to anyone who had Bucs plus three and a half. But the Chiefs do feel like a light switch team where they could be down and just like, all right, let let's flip it and we'll win and it will be good.
Always because you can figure out a way to get Tyreek Hill the ball. Just throw a team to him.
And then he just runs faster than everybody else. They threw for an ice.
They iced the clock with a pass that never in your mind was in doubt. Right.
Like, oh, that's a perfect play. They can do that.
It's crazy to watch. They're playing a different sport.
And then after the game, we have to give an update on this because Tom Brady picks and chooses who he shakes hands with after the game. Uh-oh.
He did shake Patrick Mahomes' hand, but I saw a tweet that said that he was not wearing a mask when he did so. Uh-oh.
So Brady might be trying to get Mahomes sick, and he just respects Nick Foles so much that he doesn't want to risk transmitting anything to him. And Jared Goff.
And Jared Goff. That's why he sprints off the field instead of acknowledging him.
But I do love those weekly updates on whether or not Tom Brady shook somebody's hand. It's fantastic.
Alright, let's get to Dion before we get to Dion. We're going to get right back to the show.
Introducing Instagram teen accounts. A new way to keep your teens safer as they grow.
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New Instagram teen accounts, automatic protections for who can contact your teen and the content they can see. All right, back to part of my take.
Okay, it is that time of the week. We have our good friend Coach Prime on the show.
Week 12 in the books. A few things we've got to talk about.
So I'll go chronologically. The story from the early slate.
What the fuck happened to the Raiders? And do you think that this is a derailment that's going to, you know, they were the team that everyone said, watch out for the Raiders after they went toe-to-toe with the Chiefs and they get punked by the Falcons. What do you make of that? I didn't have enough guts to pick the Falcons.
And I think I said that on the football football show, but I really felt good about them. The Raiders defense is hot garbage.
I mean, hot garbage, hot garbage, like straight out of the microwave. And you know that one thing about the Valk is they have an offense that's impeccable.
They're pretty darn good. They can score on anybody.
They just can't stop no darn body. And they had the advantage of a home game.
And the Raiders are down the middle of the road. They're really not that good.
But they put up a fight. They play hard every week.
But defensively, they ain't going nowhere with that bull jump, man. Well, they got Raheem Morris, and he's's coached them to 4-2 down Atlanta.
Do you think that there's a chance that they keep Raheem around after the season's over as the full-time head coach? Nope. That's a good question, though.
I would love them to. I would love them to.
If you went out, it's going to be a concern. You really got to make that decision.
But I don't think they will. I would would love them to because i think he's had experience he got a raw deal there in tampa and he's a good guy guys like it the only reason i kind of agree with that although i feel like he's definitely played himself or coach himself into consideration but if you have an owner like arthur blank your last hire was a defensive guy you're probably going to go with an offensive guy because you're like well last time it didn't work out so I'll just do the opposite of what I did before well they need a defensive guy they do need a defensive guy or you need a honestly man if they could somewhere somehow convince a guy like Rex Ryan to come out and take over the defense they would be phenomenal oh I like a real defensive mind to do something with that defense.
That's the kind of guy that you need. So one last note on this game, and we've had this disagreement before, but Derek Carr fumbled three times.
He has small hands. Small, really small hands.
He has small hands. You've got to stop.
He has small hands. He's got like kitten mittens.
You don't care about that? They're just tiny little stubs. We had this whole talk about small hands.
He's got to stop. He has small hands.
He's got like kitten mittens. You don't care about that? Tiny little stubs.
We had this whole talk about small hands. First of all, what is a small hand? What is really a small hand? Below nine inches, right? Is there a certain size that says small hands or does it the look of a small hand? It's nine inches or smaller.
You know what small hands look like. I've shaken a couple small hands before, but I don't really know what a small hand looks like.
I know what it feels like. I don't know what it looks like.
It's science, though. It's not like...
I can't say a quarterback can't throw and he's fumbling because he has a small hand. I've never heard that.
I do... Guys, certain guys, like Aaron Rodgers, for example.
Aaron Rodgers, he'll get hit, and the ball will just be stuck in his hand because he has big fucking hands. I do think there's a little small part of it, no pun intended with the small, but Derek Carr been playing great this year, but in terms of ball security, and we'll have our stats guy pull up some stats for you, but in terms of ball security, that is an issue.
So do Carson Wentz have big hands? Because his ball security is hot garbage. I know, yeah.
He just thinks Derek Carr has fumbled 60 times in his 104 games. 28 lost.
60 times. So what about Carson Wentz? That's a lot of fumbles.
He's got a small brain. That's different.
There are different parts of your body that can be small that adversely affect your ability to play football. But there is something.
You think that for the last 50 years, they've been looking at hand size just because they have no idea what they're doing? Do you think they've got fetishes? They might actually. I've never seen a guy not get drafted because of his hand size.
I've never seen a guy not get drafted because he didn't run the three-cone drill right.

It's like some stupid stuff that they do at the combine.

I've never seen a guy not get drafted because he couldn't bench 225 five times.

Never seen it.

That's just some of the dumb stuff that they do in the NFL.

I agree with you.

I do not think if a guy is good, who cares how big his hands are.

But there is a concern with the fumbles and that is directly

correlated with his hand size whatever I'm right you're wrong it's fine let's move on to a different

game uh what do you make of uh the Tennessee Titans tractor Cito so we we've been talking

about it for years but Derek Henry gets better as the season goes along is there something to be

said for a defense later in the season maybe it's uh November December your body's banged up

Thank you. Henry gets better as the season goes along.
Is there something to be said for a defense later in the season? Maybe it's November, December, your body's banged up. You just don't really want to tackle him the same way.
Is there something about him getting better as the season goes on? You know, we just interviewed him on the segment I called Give Me Five. We just took five minutes from him this weekend and he came on 21st and prime.
And this guy here, man, I think he's a phenomenon. I really think he is a treasure in the NFL that's underappreciated because he is as consistent as it comes.
He knows he's going to get eight in the box. Everybody's going to be outside man-to-man, so he's making the whole team better.
Receivers got to win. You got one-on-ones on the darn outside you but they are really doing but this team is so unpredictable the defense is not as good as it was last year so they're middle of the road i did not pick them to win but had i known derrick henry was going for a buck 78 that you cannot rush for 178 yards to lose they don't even go together he does he is unbelievable he does look like he's been running hard the last last couple weeks.
I don't know if the defenses, like Big Cat says, are getting tired later on in the year, or if he just finds that next gear as the weather gets a little bit colder. People don't want to tackle Derrick Henry anymore.
We saw the exact same thing last year, so I think it's probably going to continue. Yeah, I think it will too.
I told him that had he and I played against each other, I would have formed Taggart. You would have said that before.
Yes, I would have. You would have dove out of his shoelaces and he would have calmly stepped over you like Allen Iverson over Tyronn.
When I really told him that he would have never done me like Josh Norman because we would have never got in this situation. But no, but seriously, this is an honest question.
Being in a locker room, I mean, you were on good teams. but no, maybe when you're on the Falcons, if you get to later in the season, is there a mentality? It's not talked about, but is there a mentality of like, fuck, I don't really want to tackle this guy anymore.
No, no, no. Only thing that was a phenomenon when I was with the Falcons, when we were hot garbage early in my career, we call it bowling.
Okay. What bowling means is we want, you know, when somebody can't bowl, they put the rails up on the sides so the ball can stay in bounds.
So what we did, everybody stood on the edge of the field on the sideline because we didn't want nobody to go out of bounds because we wanted the game to be over as soon as possible, especially in the way. I like that.
I love that. So we went bowling.
Keep the clock running.

What about the Bills game?

So the Buffalo Bills, they won,

but they have an issue that they need to address at some point,

which is they do not know how to defend against a Hail Mary. They gave up two catches on a Hail Mary today.

One of them counted.

The other was pass interference.

And then, obviously, DeAndre Hopkins from a couple weeks ago.

As a defensive back, I mean, I probably shouldn't ask you this because i i skied above you and caught a ball over your head a couple weeks ago but what was your mentality well there's film out there you can watch if you want to but what was your mentality uh in defending against like an end of game situation where it's a hail mary first of all i've made the defensive back coach put me in the back in the middle so I could get the ball intercepting the running all the way back. I was not taking a knee.
Second of all, if you got defensive backs that cannot are not ball savvy, most defensive backs were bad receivers early on. What I would do, I would take the receivers and put them in the back three all the way across the goal line and let those guys who are normally known for catching the darn football go catch the darn football.
Yeah. That's what I would do.
That's the kind of coach you got right now at Jackson State. I think it's a decent strategy unless they do the thing that the Dolphins did and then you're stuck in a situation where your tight end is now your free safety.
Then you're kind of fucked. I would not put Gronk my tight end back there.
No reason. All right.
Biggest game of Sunday, the Bucs and the Chiefs. What the hell do you do to stop Patrick Mahomes and Tyreek Hill? That was insane.
He had 13 catches, 269 yards, three touchdowns. Patrick Mahomes had 300 yards in the first half.
What do you do? What do you do to try to stop them? Double it. You're doubling.
Everybody else got a man up. You're doubling.
You put somebody in his face, bump him, and double it. That's all you have to do.
Double him. Take him out of the game and say he's not going to beat you.
If anybody, let Travis Kelsey beat you, man. It's a slow death that way.
You don't want to have an expedition death with this guy being here. And I feel sorry.
You know, I'm a defensive back of defensive backs. 24, I don't even know his name right now, but I feel bad for him, man, straight up.
Like, I guarantee you his phone was ringing off the hook of blowing up with means and everything because it was his – we call it birthday. Like, when I'm coaching right now and I coach the offense like I did last night, if I see a vulnerable cornerback, all I do is say birthday, birthday, birthday rabbit.
It means we're going to blow him out like a candle to the right side. And that's what they get today.
They bless that kid, man. I feel bad for him.
Walk me through this from a defensive perspective because I always say, like, it's really easy to say, like, oh, wow, if you're playing against the Bucs, for example, you've got to double-team Gronk. You've got to double-team Mike Evans.
You've got to double-team Antonio. You have to double-team everybody.
How many guys can you actually double-team during one single play? Two. We played the Vikings years ago when I was with the Cowboys.
We had a double-double. You've got to understand, they had Chris Carter, Randy Moss, and then they had Jake Reed.
We double-doubled, then I manned up Jake Reed alone, which was a great scheme. We lost, but it wasn't a defensive fault

because we played an adequate game that week.

But you could probably double up to two guys.

What's the stat

line if you go one-on-one

with Tyreek Hill?

I'm praying.

So does he catch?

I mean, he's got to catch something.

No, no, no.

You can't even ask me that. I'm praying.
He doesn't beat you deep. No, no, no.
I'm primed. So 50 yards, no touchdowns.
I'm primed. I don't think you guys understand.
You would lock him down. I got two jackets.
Tyreek Hill, zero catches, zero yards. I got a red jacket for the NFL's 100.
And I got a gold jacket for the Hall of Fame. You can't even ask me stuff like that.
I'm crying. I got three jackets in the closet, and I didn't buy either of them.
So you never gave up a big game to anybody? Ooh. Ooh.
That was the big game. What was the worst game you ever had? That was the big game.
Atlanta. What was the worst stat line against you? I'm going to look this up We didn't really go into stat lines that way It wasn't like that We didn't even look at it It wasn't like that back then Randy Moss never got you No he never blessed me with a birthday A lot of stat lines are deceptive But like right now they really have it it where when you were one-on-one with that guy.
I played against guys and they had 100, but they didn't have 100 when I was guarding them. A lot of times, when we played against the Cowboys when I was with San Fran, when we played zone, I went to I played regular, either side.
We played man, I went to Harper, and they doubled Mike because Alvin Harper used to eat him alive back in the day. So we doubled Mike.
I took Harper, and Merton Hanks took Novichek, and it was over. I'm reading right now.
Jerry Rice did have his 225-yard five-touchdown game against the Falcons.

Wasn't me.

Wasn't him.

Watched the whole film.

Wasn't him.

Matter of fact, I really felt bad because the other corner they want to switch,

that's the Charles Demery game.

I think Jerry scored five touchdowns that game.

Yeah, he did.

That's basically what Tyreek Hill did today.

Oh, my God.

It's sad.

You want to call timeout for him and say, man, let me come over there. No, I got it.
No, you don't. Were you mad at Jerry Rice when you didn't shake your hand before that play? Because you really put your arm out there.
You were like, hey, damn me up. No, that was like boxers, like last night before the fight.
And then, guys, I saw your commentary on the fight last night. Matter of fact, I cannot wait to get to that this week.
Matter of fact, I need to come on your show. You need to come on ours because we got to talk about that fight.
Nate Robinson, oof. Oh, we got to talk about that.
That was bad. Was it worth it? I'd say no.
I would say no. Not worth it.
Maybe it's fresh. Maybe it's too fresh.
my daughter's sitting here right now, my grown daughter. And I know for a fact that if it happened to me, she would not look at me to say.
No, you can't. No, you can't do it.
At some point, it's just not even worth it because even if he won, like what's the upside? It's not as much as the downside. Yeah.
You can't get knocked out. But the downside, downs like the way it ended there's no way you could encourage your kid now and say come on son you can't give up you gotta fight through it fight through it dad are you kidding me that was bad that was very very bad that was very very bad um i feel bad for him yes dion you and i have a little bit of beef too because you came at me on thanksgiving day the the highest of holidays as far as i'm concerned you had an issue what did i do you had an issue with my macaroni and cheese my my old family recipe that i make uh the mayo and breadcrumb mixture you don't need cheese that was not macaroni and cheese it's just strictly mayo macaroni and cheese turned out? That was not macaroni and cheese.
Because it turned out pretty good. It was garbage.
It was almost white. The macaroni and cheese was almost white, and it wasn't in cheese.
What was it? It was macaroni, breadcrumbs, and mayonnaise. Mayonnaise, yeah.
The Holy Trinity. I guarantee you, as soon as you ate that, you were straight to the toilet.
Which you didn't see, though, was the after pick. After I added five different types of cheese to it, Andy Reid style, and then baked a whole mess of mac and cheese.
You got a direct deposit to the toilet right after you made that. Yep.
I was all plugged up. All right, my last question for you, Dion.
Back to that Bucs-Chiefs game. At what point is it too late for the Bucs to kind of figure it out on offense? Because it just looks clunky, and it looks like it's not.
Is there, can they at some point this season, can Tom Brady walk into Bruce Arians' offense and be like, let me just do it. Let me run the thing that I did in New England.
Let's stop throwing it deep all the time. Let me be Tom Brady, and it will win.
Can he do that, or is it too late late i saw a statistic during that game today you guys may have seen it also bruce arians the great quarterback team's coach in the first year all of them had at least 15 picks at least i think 15 to 17 picks so that's not good that's not good management of an offense he really let needs to let tom be tom um let him go out there and do his thing. I think they need to move Antonio in the slot.
They got to get Antonio more involved because he's a dog, man, and they're not using him right whatsoever. And put those other guys on the outside and just let them work.
But if you... Antonio is a game changer and a chain mover, man.
He is not nearly what he once were.

They're using him incorrectly.

Yeah, I mean, it's just the whole thing looks a little weird and they have

all the talent. It does not look good.

Yeah, yeah. Tom doesn't look good.

Where do Cam go from here? Last one. Where does

Cam go? I don't know.

Yeah, if you were Cam, would you go somewhere

and be a backup? Because that's what he might have

to do next year. That's what I'm like.
reading is probably like five quarterbacks coming out of college he probably is gonna go in the first round this year some pretty good ones yep but what do you do like the what's going on right now do you do you do this over do you give another shot i i think if you're cam and it will be a blow to his ego because you know he, he's an MVP, what, five years ago, four years ago. I honestly think I would go to a great situation, kind of a Jamison in New Orleans.
Now, obviously, Taysom Hill kind of has changed that because he ended up being the true backup. But go somewhere where it's a great situation.
A team will have you. And if the starter gets hurt, you basically are walking into a championship- championship level team you can't dress like that and come off the bench that's true you do have to yes you're right you're right that's a great point he needs to change his entire wardrobe if he comes off the bench what situation might look like that across the NFL would it be like Atlanta maybe none I don't know maybe I don't know.
Maybe. Yeah, maybe.
I mean, you know what would be an interesting one? Is it like a Sean McVay or Kyle Shanahan? What about Atlanta? He's from Atlanta. Yeah.
Yeah. That's basically why I said it.
But then they do have an aging quarterback and a new coach. Who knows who that's going to be? But, yeah, like Kyle Shanahan would be an interesting one.
Go somewhere where the coaching, you know, it's a system that you'll have success in. Everyone just picked the Packers, by the way, on NBC.
So I'm happy about that. That's great.
Let's go. Let's go.
All right. Well, Dion, thank you as always.
You look great in that hat. He's wearing a Peaky Blinders hat.
You look swaggy. I'm going to wear one third suit, too.
So Tyree Kill would have like three touchdowns against you. Tyree Kill, three touchdowns against you.
I'm praying. Okay.
See ya. See ya.
We're going to get right back to the show. Introducing Instagram teen accounts.
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job new instagram teen accounts automatic protections for who can contact your teen and the content they can see all right back to part of my take so we've got four nominees first off cowboys head coach mike mccarthy this was late last week but we couldn't include him last week because he came out on monday yeah he pulled out a sledgehammer during during Saturday night's team meeting and smashed watermelons like Gallagher to emphasize their objectives. He smashed his own brain after that with that shitty fake punt that he called.
Oh, man. Well, it worked because this was for the Vikings.
Yeah, it was a Vikings game. So that's first.
Next, we have two football gals of the week. Okay.
Gals can be guys. Yes.
You clipped this one. The niece of ESPN reporter, Shelly Smith.
This is awesome. She told the story that her niece once wore her Ducks jacket to a game versus Oregon State and got hit in the head with a chunk of ice, but it didn't knock her out.
It knocked her silly. Alright, let's put this in.
Put this clip in. This really is one of the nastiest rivalries in all of college football and how do I know? Because've been to a bunch of them once i was here with my niece vanessa who was wearing her ducks jacket she got hit and hit in the head with a chunk of ice it didn't knock her out but it knocked her silly that was one of the most ridiculous clips ever i was watching the game live and i was so confused when she said this because it's a national broadcast and and she's like, hey, funny little anecdote.
My niece got hit with some ice. Yeah.
What? Now she's insane. And that's the rivalry.
I wrote it in the blog. If you could do Mad Libs for what she was going to say next, I don't think you would ever guess that.
And the whole look, she was like, the game was crazy because it was a fog game, couldn't see shit. The announcers were literally like, and he goes back to pass.
Wait, maybe he didn't pass. They were saying that shit.
No, the play action was fucking everybody up. Yeah, and she was all bundled up.
Shelly Smith, she looked like an ant. She is like, that story is the embodiment of, oh, my crazy ant did something weird.
But in this case, it's like she went on TV and told a story about me getting hit in the face with a bunch of ice. It was very, very funny.
Next we have probably the biggest story this week in sports. Vanderbilt kicker Sarah Fuller who became the first woman to play in a Power 5 college football game.
Got her coach fired at her. Is it wrong to say that? She played one game.
Derek Mason got fired. Coach killer.
PFT squib kick Twitter really came out in full force. Squib kick was, but yeah, it was a squib kick.
I don't know what the process of seeing what she was able to do and where the kick was going to go, how the game plan went on. But it was a squib, and I think she hit it where they were telling her to hit it.
I would have liked to see her try a field goal, but it just stinks that Vanderbilt is so incompetent. They got across midfield a few times.
Did they? Yeah, they did. Barely, yeah.
That is so Vanderbilt to be like, hey, we're going to break this barrier and we're never going to get into field goal. Yep.
Lastly, you mentioned Robert Sala earlier. He said he wakes up in the morning on Thanksgiving and eats pumpkin pie as his appetizer.
Ooh, pie for breakfast. I don't know if I'd hire that guy.
Real football guys don't even know that it's true. They're just like, yeah, it's just another day.
Wood Will Muschamp say Thanksgiving is a meal. Yeah, my wife makes me come home one day a year, Thanksgiving.
Jake, did you do the burn of the ships one? No, we had Tom Allen on a few weeks ago. Wait, what? Who burned the ships? No, no, dude, dude.
No, listen to this one. I'm just going to add one because this is actually sick.
Okay. So there was a football coach in Western Boone in the middle of Indiana.
His name is Justin Pulley. And in order to motivate his players, he told him the story of Cortez, who, yeah, he's a terrible guy, who burned.
He's canceled. Listened to Cortez the Killer by Neil Young, who burned his ships to motivate his men to fight harder.
And what the guy did to motivate his team to win. What's his name? Dave Portnoy? No, no.
He bought a ship and burnt it on the lawn in front of the high school. He bought a full boat and lit it on fire, bonfire to motivate his players to win that week.
Are you sure this is real? Yeah, he bought a speedboat and then blew it up. And Jake, you missed this? I mean, I didn't see it on Twitter.
Jake, just Billy. Dude.
Uh-oh. Who gives a fuck about pumpkin pie? He's burning a ship.
Wow. I just don't know about the validity of that.
So, Billy, in between you doing your other podcast and this show, where did you find the time to bring up that football guy? Yeah, Billy, you're trying to cuck me, but you don't even do the sheets for them. Oh.
But Jake, it does. I tagged you this on Twitter.
Jake, it is a fair question. Do you think maybe a little much, too much time college basketball? A little too much time bench mob? Go subscribe.
I do love the bench mob podcast. Go subscribe.
Our darling Jake. You're trying to get me to crack.
Our darling Jake does a new podcast that he cares about more than this. This is my priority.
If you tell me to quit and do this full time, I'm never.

No, go subscribe.

Our good friends Rico Bosco and Marty Mush.

I think it's the number one college basketball podcast in the country.

I saw a sign outside DJ's.

It was.

Okay.

No, yeah.

Go subscribe.

You guys should not question my loyalty.

While you were out, Billy, while you were out of this actual studio,

I don't know what you were doing.

You were probably doing the bench mob.

It's okay.

Billy was like, can I start doing football guy of the week?

And we're like, yeah, sure.

And then he's like, no, actually, no, no, no, no.

I got finals.

No.

He took literally less than a second.

He took control of football guy guy the week for a second.

And then he was like, nah, I don't want to do it.

I'll just say, no, this is pretty cool.

Because the point of the ship was that they couldn't go home,

so they'd fight and play harder.

Yeah, we get it.

Yeah, we got that part.

So do you think we should burn?

We know.

Burning ships is, I think, pretty cool.

I'm searching the name Justin Pulley on Twitter. He's a high school coach.
I don't know if it's a real... It doesn't matter.
You would think it would make headlines. Where'd you find it, Billy? Did you burn the ships? Did you burn a ship in front of your barn? Someone just emailed me, burn the ships.
I saw it too. Is someone pranking Billy? That would be all time.
Start sending fake football guy of the week stories to Billy. Dan Listinski.
Yeah. Start sending fake.
That's a fake name. This would be so.
Oh, God. I'm going to have Billy's back on this one.
Okay. That's pretty sick.
I think there was just a boat fire, and the guy was like, I did this to motivation. Yeah.
Then he got his insurance money. That's pretty motivational.
Okay. All right.
Well, either way, Jake. I found it.
Yeah?

And how'd you miss it?

At Billy Hot Takes, check what this Indiana football coach did to motivate his team before

their championship game.

They adopted the motto, burn the ships, alluding to Cortez.

Who tweeted it at him?

Justin Pulley?

No, some guy.

Dan O.

Coach 26.

All right.

That was 100 likes.

So throw him in.

Take Mike McCarthy out because he's a week old.

I do like the fact that this football coach bought an extra ship, like a vacation boat,

I'm going to go to the next episode. That was 100 likes.
So throw him in. Take Mike McCarthy out because he's a week old.
I do like the fact that this football coach bought an extra ship,

like a vacation boat, and then lit that on fire to symbolize.

We'll try to get him on.

If he wins, we'll get him on. There's no turning back now, boys.

Billy, get him on.

Is there any boats in Indiana?

Yeah, there's no water.

There's no water.

We're going to get a boat.

He's burned a boat.

There's the canal.

Lakes don't exist, Billy.

Oh, you forgot about lakes. Are there lakes in India no they're actually not it's just a bunch of milk I thought it was just cornfields pools yeah people yeah they have above ground pools filled with whole milk and when they break open they just kind of become a natural lake Indiana does not border any Finger Lakes I'm pretty sure about that any Finger Lakes maybe not Finger Maybe not Finger Lakes, Great Lakes.
Any lake can be a Finger Lake. Yeah, actually, it does touch Lake Michigan.
Oh, it does? Yeah. Oh, it's the little part next to Chicago.
Gary, Indiana. How many lakes in Indiana? 86.
Well, it's not land of thousands. It's actually not that many lakes.
That's not that many lakes. No, that's not that many lakes.
And they could be large ponds. Yeah, no, that's not that many lakes and they could be large ponds yeah no that's not that many lakes but it is a significant there are lakes vote for football guy of the week vote for football guy of the week we're going to add that one in Jake is very distraught now I feel, Jake.
You can do your little podcast. You're a good son.
Benchmob, go subscribe. We love that podcast.
All right, vote for Phil Sorocco, OneBlade, Football Guy of the Week. All right, let's do Baby Braun, and then we'll get out of here with who's back of the week.
Baby Braun of the week. Hank.
Can I combine mine? Dude, is LeBron... You can do whatever you want.
Is this the first... Can I have a question real quick before we do baby brawns? Yes.

I think the answer is yes.

Is this the first time he's ever watched sports?

Oh, I thought you were going to say, is he doing this?

No, he's just baby brawning everyone.

I know.

I think he's a listener.

This is the summer of brawn right now.

Baby brawn.

But he's watching every sport.

Yeah, because this is his little vacation away from playing basketball.

So he's just hanging out on his couch getting drunk every day.

He's drinking his tequila,

watching TV. It actually

sounds like he's probably having a great time.

But he's just amazed by everything that

he sees. Yeah.

Everything that he sees blows

his mind. He's like

someone who's high. Yeah, he might be

microdosing. He's on his new

tequila. He's a shit face all

the time, which I guess is nothing new for him.

He is my baby brown of the week, though. He's been

tweeting out old clips of himself

I love you. He's on his new tequila.
He's a shit face all the time, which I guess is nothing new for him. He is my baby Braun of the week, though.
He's been tweeting out old clips of himself, kind of like doing the letter to me on Instagram. Oh, I like that, Hank.
But he's been tweeting. There's been clips of him in high school and stuff that he's quote-tweeting and being like, oh, man, this is crazy.
Strive for greatness, young king, blah, blah, blah, blah. Telling himself from future advice from adult LeBron.
So he's baby braoning baby brawn. Yeah.
And he baby brawned baby brawn. LeBron James Jr.
Oh, yeah. He Instagrammed pictures of them working out and stuff.
That was going to be my baby brawn. It would be brawny.
Brawny's my baby brawn of the week. I just did that.
No, but you did LeBron James as a young brawn. He just did baby brawn.
You said young Bron was Bronny. Bronny's my baby Bron of the week.
I just did that. No, but you did LeBron James as a young Bron.
He just did baby Bron. You said young Bron was Bron baby of the week.
Bron Bron. I'm saying that Bron Bron is baby Bron of the week.
And also, fine. I always pronounce Bronny as Brony.
Brony? Yeah. Like my little pony? Like the guys that fuck my little ponies? Yeah, it's Brony James.
It might be. I don't know.
It just makes me laugh. I always read it that way.
My other baby Bron of the week. Imagine Bron just is like, he's an undercover brony.
He probably is. He wants to fuck My Little Pony, so he named his kid Brony.
I heard that LeBron James makes all the free agents of the sign wear tails underneath their uniforms. I heard that too.
Hank has a much bigger what? Wait, what's that, Billy? Hank has a bigger what? A bigger what? Hank has a bigger what? A very detailed email. Oh.
Oh, yeah. Is that what they're calling it? From the guy.
From the guy. A really detailed email with pictures and stuff.
All right. Wait.
Do you have another baby brown? I was going to say my other baby brown of the week was Joe Biden's dog, Scout. Oh, yeah.
Crossed him up. He's out here breaking ankles.
He's scratching ankles on Joe Biden. Had to go to the

hospital. He's got a foot injury, which can be

I mean, Clay Thompson and myself

a lot of people tell you foot injuries

are very bad.

Well, he's lucky that dog didn't bite him.

Alright, my baby round of the week is Jarrett Patterson.

Buffalo running back

had eight touchdowns.

Eight touchdowns, like 400 plus yards. 409 yards.
I don't know how his coach pulled him. Unreal move.
He actually said after he apologized to him. He just didn't know.
He didn't know. But someone has to tell him.
Yeah, so this is what always amazes me about NFL sidelines and college football sidelines. They don't have a guy that's on the sideline watching TV.
Or just watching Twitter. You should be on the sideline watching television and scrolling Twitter in a lazy boy just to let your coach know about important situations like this where, hey, this guy could set all kinds of records if you just give him the ball one more time.
Could you imagine if you had a Twitter watcher on your sideline? There should be. I just walked up to Matt Nagy and was like, hey, buddy not going well i mean it's i'm gonna shoot you straight it is not going well uh-huh yeah you're trending yeah adam gaze is trending walks up to matt patricia yeah hey man uh you just looked everyone's just saying that you look disheveled by the way matt patricia getting fired just totally under the radar like fire him fire him after on a college football Saturday, after Thanksgiving, before Sunday.
Well, he's in the fourth quarter of Michigan-Penn State. Right.
Literally, like, that's the best time to be fired. You could very well wake up tomorrow morning and not realize that Matt Patricia was fired until we just said that.
Oh, he was definitely fired on Saturday. But you know what I'm saying.
Like? You're having a little mini break. You're watching college football.
You're waiting for NFL happen, so he's not going to lead on Monday. No one's going to be talking about it.
Matt Patricia was fired. There will never be anybody who is going to be more unemployed than Matt Patricia is going to be in the next couple months.
He's going to be the most employed guy of all time. Just like sweatpants all the time.
He probably won't put on a shirt. Definitely not one with buttons on it.
His beard is going to grow out. What do they do with all the gear? He's going to look like a walking Geely suit.
What do they do with all the gear? Oh, he's probably been hoarding that for a while. He knew that this day would come.
That would suck, though, to have to wear it. Do you rid your closet of all the gear? Matt Patricia is still absolutely going to wear it because that's his free stuff that he got.

Yeah.

He's got just like a desk filled with pencils

that he's been squirreling away for the last two years.

And then just a walk-in closet of Lions jumpsuits.

Yeah.

All right, so Jarrett Patterson is my Baby Braun of the Week.

Billy, do you have one?

Yes, my Baby Braun of the Week.

And LeBron would totally do this, but Baby Braun Mike Tyson. Because Mike Tyson showed out.
He said he was high during the fight, though. Yeah.
But he's older than LeBron. I know, but LeBron would totally be like, yo, Mike Tyson, my baby brawn.
No, you don't understand baby brawn. I get it.
I get it. I think he might do that.
But LeBron would be like, yo, baby Bron, Mike Tyson. Why would he say that for someone that's older than him? That's the thing.
It's like he's because LeBron would be like, I'm LeBron. Baby Bron is specifically for up-and-coming athletes who remind – their greatness reminds LeBron of LeBron.
Yes, but that's the thing. He would totally do it.
Someone does something awesome and LeBron goes,

oh, you know who else is awesome?

Me, LeBron.

Exactly, like Mike Tyson.

But Mike Tyson fought a draw

for a pay-per-view

that was totally forgettable.

And he was in his prime

when LeBron was like 12.

Exactly.

I agree, Billy,

that LeBron might have done that.

It's not a who's back.

LeBron might have done that

if Mike Tyson went out there and beat the shit out of him. But he did.
Roy Jordan Jr. was like, draw.
No, he didn't. It was a draw.
It was a draw. Mike Tyson was like, I want to do it again.
Roy Jordan Jr. was like, we go by the judges.
Dude, I'm scared. Is Roy Jew? I have a baby brawn of the week.
Thank you, Jake. Who's your baby brawn? Jake, go ahead.
Do you have a real one? Notre Dame running back, Kyron Williams. I see you hit him with the silencer to close out the game.
Yes, that is a great baby Braun. Reminds me of me.
Hit him with the silencer. It would be totally LeBron to baby Braun, Mike Tyson.
No, it wouldn't. Yes, it would.
It makes no sense. It's baby Braun of the week, not theoretical baby Braun of the week.
It's not Billy forgot to do this. I did this.
I wrote it down. Yeah? I prepped it.
All right.

It would be funny.

Who's back of the week?

Billy, redeem yourself.

All right, wait.

Before we do who's back, PFT, you had a real quick word from our friend Screwball.

Yeah, but actually, this is another who's back of the week is Screwball Whiskey because

I drank some Screwball Whiskey over the Thanksgiving holiday.

Same.

Screwball Whiskey.

Did you, Hank?

Mm-hmm.

You like the peanut butter stuff?

Yeah.

Screwball Whiskey is delicious.

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Mix it up a little bit. Tastes delicious.
It won't fill you up. That's the best part about sipping on whiskey screwball peanut butter whiskey is the ultimate duo of two american favorites american whiskey and peanut butter flavor the end result you get a whiskey that sips different it's got a warm and welcoming aroma it's got a deliciously sweet meat savory palate and then it's got a light and smooth finish at the end screwball tastes amazing all by itself and it's 70 proof you can enjoy it neat on the rocks or as a shot it's actually a very smooth shot to take if you're looking for a go-to at like a holiday party a get-together amongst friends you want to drink something that isn't going to sting too much but it's still going to get you nice and liquored up 70 proof why not go for screwball peanut butter whiskey? If you're making cocktails, you can replace your usual whiskey with screwball, get a whole new experience.
You can take a big scoop of vanilla ice cream. This is actually my favorite to do.
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It's easy. It's awesome.
It'd be great for date night. You could add it to coffee, hot chocolate, or eggnog for a festive treat.
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All right.

Who's back of the week to end the show?

Hank.

My who's back of the week is smoking dope slash getting lit before games and sporting events.

Wow.

Mike Tyson.

Oh, yeah.

Mike Tyson, after his exhibition, that was a draw that he did not win.

He confirmed to reporters that he was high as shit during the fight. Apparently, that something he used to do.
He would just smoke weed and fight. And Marshawn Lynch came out and did an interview and said he used to take shots of Hennessy before every game.
I'm always amazed by any athlete that can do anything while they're high. It is the most...
It's crazy to me that you can go out there and box while you're stoned. When I'm stoned, I just want to sit on my ass and replay the events of times that were either really awesome or really bad in my own head.
It's basically an eSport, so it's basically a sport. But sometimes I'll smoke and play Call of Duty, and I'm not as good either.
Yeah, that's true. Dropping the gulag.
Yeah, you think it's like, yo, chill out.

It is technically a stimulant.

You're going to be great.

Marijuana?

Really? It just doesn't work like that.

It speeds up your heart rate.

Marijuana is not a stimulant.

It speeds up your heart rate.

Jay, can you look that up?

Yeah, no, look that up.

Marijuana is not.

Marijuana is not.

No, no, no.

Actually, I went to freaking drug classes.

Oh.

Yeah?

Why?

No, no, like in school.

Don't do drugs, kids.

It's called probation.

Just because you take a drug test doesn't mean that at school.

I got some guy just tweeted at me.

Is that a question?

Is marijuana a stimulant or a depressant?

Make sure to remind Big Cat he put the biggest jinx in Northwestern this weekend.

Yeah, no, I did.

Whoops.

Yeah.

Might have gotten the boys a little too pumped up.

Yeah.

Yeah. Whoops.
Sorry, Ravel. We had a tough week as a dean of the college of medial yeah speaking of stealing stealing football guys revelle was just tried to self-nominate someone who what revelle what do you mean he tweeted out like uh as big of a football guys uh there is and is michigan state's guy with a fun name oh Oh, fuck it.
He had a fun name. Cool.
Fuck it. He looked like Draco Malfoy on Michigan State.
Drake. I did get high on Friday, and I peed.
And I got it all into the toilet, and I felt like I was a fucking sniper. No, I mean, I, like, nailed it, like, all into the water.
Wait, let me. Yeah, it's called jizz.
No, no. Marijuana has a stimulant effect.
As a result, weed can be classified as a depressant stimulant or hallucinogen. Oh! So all the above.
It depends if you're smoking mids like Billy. If it's ghost dog, if it's ghost dog, that shit is a stimulant.
If it's purple rainberry, rainbow kush, that shit is a down a downer if it's afghan that's the hallucinogen yeah just anything you do you should do in moderation yeah especially moderation because response until billy comes around then it's a downer yeah until a narc is in the house uh my who's back of the week is short shorts in college basketball. Oh, yeah.
We've been calling that. I think we said like three years ago that they were starting to come back.
They're fully back now. There was like one dude on Indiana that started to bring it back a couple years ago.
Yep. Now it's like 40.
James Wiseman was a short shorts guy. He was for three games.
Yeah. Now there's probably like 40% of college basketball players are rocking short shorts.
It actually makes sense. Athletically speaking, it makes sense.
If you're playing a sport where you have to dribble between your legs occasionally. And also get low.
And run. And not get grabbed onto.
I've been saying for years, short shorts make more sense in basketball. And they're cool.
I think they look cool. My other who's back of the week is journalism fights.
So Florio and Schefter. Yeah, Jake and Billy, first of all.
Florio and Schefter had an old-fashioned source-off on Thanksgiving night. The funny thing was what they were arguing about was the smallest detail possible over when the Ravens would be allowed to go back into the facility to practice.
Naturally. And Schefter was like, sources inside the building say that they're not going back until Monday.
And then Florio was like, that's what the Ravens think, but it's not their call to make, Schefter. And then Schefter started quote-tweeting him.
And now Florio won't let go of it. So he keeps, as more information comes out, he keeps quote-tweet dunking on Schefter and doing like the eyeballs so I think technically Mike Florio was correct to say that the NFL was going to make the call as to when they go back into facility but Schefter was also still correct that they wouldn't be going back into facility until Monday which is what Harbaugh was telling him you guys think the game's going Tuesday? Hank, I know that you don't want it to.
No, I do. I do, actually.
Not that anyone cares, but I have Pittsburgh defense for fantasy, and I need them to win. Oh, so that's more important than the Patriots? What do you mean? Well, that's why you didn't want the game to happen.
True. Patriots fans don't, Hank, you just want everybody to be safe, right? Yeah.
If there's somebody who's sick, cancel it. No, the NFL doesn't give a fuck about that.
Obviously. All right, but who's back of the week? I was going to say, you were saying earlier that Harbaugh, if he does get fired from Michigan, should coach the Detroit Lions.
Yes. It's his only way to restore his legacy, like, to restore his legacy in the state of Detroit in Michigan.

What about this?

What if all the Harbaugh's went together and coached the Detroit Lions, like, as a unit?

Throwing Tom Crane.

Like, a family.

Yeah.

I mean, pretty sweet.

Do it.

What do you say, Billy?

My who's back?

No, my who's back.

Is Magic Johnson tweeting things 24 hours later?

So, he, the big fight happened on Saturday night, and then he tweeted during the Packers-Bears game, praying for Nate Robinson. And we all actually thought Nate Robinson went to the hospital and something really bad happened.
And then I looked at Magic's Twitter, and I realized that, no, he's just replaying the fight tonight, 24 hours later, because the tweet before was, last night I watched the fight between Mike Tyson and Roy Jones Jr. and then started giving his MVPs, which was everyone.
Everyone won the MVP. It's not necessarily a bad thing to do every now and again, knowing what Nate's going through.
Just periodically tweet out, praying for Nate Robinson. He He's gonna need that over the next couple years

His sneakers were cool

They were

That was all I had

Billy

We want you to beat up which Paul?

Jake

Yeah

He's tiny

Can we have you beat up Jake Paul?

I will fuck up Jake Paul 100%

He's small

I need some time to actually learn how to box

But he's a fraud

He's 6'1". He's not

6'1". Own your fucking

life. Is this the guy who beat up Nate Robinson last night?

Yeah, Nate Robinson. He will fuck

you up. He's 5'7

at the tallest. I looked at a picture of him

next to Dave Portnoy

and they were the exact same height.

How tall is Nate Robinson?

How tall is Dave?

I've walked around. He's just as tall as PFT.
How tall is Nate Robinson? How tall is Dave? I've walked around. He's just as tall as PFT.
How tall is PFT? Five. Nate Robinson is 5'9".
Depends on the shoe wear. Right.
I want to fight Jake Paul. I know Jake Paul would probably never fight me.
Jake Paul's height is listed as 6'1". He's not actually 6'1".
So this is where we get into the genius of Billy's mind because Billy thinks that if he can prove that Jake Paul is shorter, like a smaller creature than Billy is, that means that nature dictates that Billy can defeat him. My reach on him, I was watching the fight.
Nate Robinson couldn't get close to him. I have a bigger reach than Jake Paul.
I would totally be able to pick him out from the outside. Just saying, I know

it would probably never happen because

who the hell am I to try to fight Jake Paul?

But I was thinking about it. I was like,

I can fucking fight Jake Paul. I think we should market you

as a long lost Paul brother

that got cut out of

the entire family estate

and now you're coming in from the darkness. Bastard son.

The bastard son. The black sheep.

Coming in to take what's rightfully yours. Boom.
You're the Jon Snow of this. Exactly.
Anyway, I would totally fight you. So what was your who's back? My who's back of the week is the holiday season.
Oh. And what better way to celebrate the holiday season than by gifts for your friends and family? Oh.
Go to store.barstoolsports.com to pick up gifts that would be great for the whole family, such as Pardon My Flakes or this Pardon My Take hat, which is back in stock on Monday, which is when this is airing, as well as this football guy sweatshirt. Go to store.barstoolsports.com to get your merch today.
That was great, Billy. That was lovely.
Why are you giving me that face thing? What do you want to see with Santa? 12. 8.
69. Jake, do you have a who's back? 18.
Yeah, I do have a who's back. Think out.
Why would you cut Jake off like the back of the cereal box? It's alright. Cereal box is the theme this week, I guess.
Also, he's got Benchmops, so he probably doesn't have a who's back there. My who's back, but in his eyes not for long, is Dickie V.
Oh yeah, that was fucked up. He said he was going to die.
He's thinking about it a lot. Dickie V is definitely one of those dudes who if they cancel March Madness again this year, they'll just be floating in his pool.
I believe he's on the call for one of the Champions Classic games. Face down.
Oh, it's a Grim Reaper, baby. Dead.
Just dead as dead could be. 18.
What's your number? These guys are real PT fans. Guys, I think someone's going to get it right now.
Well, Billy mentioned the Cyber Monday gift cards or discount. I had logged all the AWLs who responded with proof, and they picked the numbers, so I'll shout them out if they get this.
Oh. I counted only 51 of the 100 numbers in there were picked by people.
Oh, wow. 50-50 shot.
Someone gets it right. All right.
I'll go with 69. 34.
Bubba has 87. 18.
69. Let's go.
39. Damn it.
I thought I had it 39 Shout out to Justin Broxmire Oh He got it He got it AWL who participated In the Cyber Monday deal And guess it Justin Broxmire Alright dude If you need a job Come We probably need a new intern. Maybe two.
Love you guys. Military dogs can get purple paws like purple hearts, but for dogs.
That's really cute. Would you fucking read that off a popsicle stick? No, I've started to write down a list.
Okay, that's... Let me see the list.
You know what that is? That's a Snapple fact. Let me see the list.
No, it's not a Snapple fact. Hey, keep it rolling.
Let me see the list. Let me see the list.
Don't take my list. I'm not going to leave.
This is for like the next three weeks. I know.
I'm not going to take your list. Let me read it.
I'm not. You're going to read my list.
I'm not. Let me read it.
You're not going to read my list. I'm not.
Hey, you know what? You want to talk about something? How did the Can't Lose Parlay do this weekend? Not great. Good question.
Not great. Oh, guess what did amazing? Oh, my parlay sheet.
I don't even room for sports. I don't even know.
How do you even know? Who's winning money for the AWLs? You sat down. You sat down.
You're like, if the Patriots win, everything wins. And then the Cardinals score and you're like, alright, go Cardinals.
Because if the Cardinals win, I had a higher payout and there was also a losing part. That is a Snapple fact.
That's Snapple fact 321. No, it isn't.
Here we go. Boom.
No, it isn't. I'm not reading Snapple facts.
No, I have a compilation of facts from everywhere. Get Justin in here.

He's our new intern.

From everywhere.

What?

Anyway.

Love you guys.

I love you guys.

I have a compilation of facts from everywhere.

I love you.

Hey, you know what?

I love the AWL.

Oh, wow.

And by the way, make sure your smoke detectors have batteries.

Seriously, just don't worry about it.

Wait, what happened?

I don't worry about it Wait, what happened? I don't know Take me young I'll be gone You're too old I need less to say I'm not sending it But I need so a little way It's only a little But life is okay Say it after me There's no way to be safe and sorry See you then. Bye.
I'll be gone Give it to you too All the things that you say You can't do it all Just play my mind You're all the things I've got to remember You shine away I'll be coming here anyway You shine away I'll be coming here anyway Take on me 10 Take me away. It's Pardon My Take presented by Barstool Sports.