Robert Iler (AJ Soprano), NFL Week 9 Preview And Billy Is A Chicken Breeder

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Speaker 3 On today's part in my take, we have an awesome, awesome interview with Robert Eiler. You probably know him as AJ Soprano.
Really cool story. You're probably wondering where he's been.

Speaker 3 Well, he's got a podcast. He was a professional poker player for a while, and he's a very cool guy.
So we can talk a little Sopranos. We get in-depth, maybe some spoilers.

Speaker 3 His acting career, what he did post, poker world. It's an awesome, awesome interview.
Kind of out of left field, but he is a big fan of Barstool and us, so he knows us, and it was really, really fun.

Speaker 3 We also have weekend preview, NFL week nine coming up. A nice slate, a nice slate coming up for NFL week nine.

Speaker 3 We have Fantasy Fuck Boys, and then we finish up with Fire Fest of the week.

Speaker 3 Before we get to all that, part of my take is brought to you by when cool, creamy ranch meets tangy, bold buffalo, the whole is greater than the sum of its sauce.

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Speaker 3 Okay,

Speaker 3 let's go.

Speaker 3 Now in the streets, there is violence.

Speaker 3 And then I love the sound of perfume be done.

Speaker 3 No place behind a low-washing.

Speaker 3 And then I can't blame all on the sun. Oh no, we're gonna rock down to Electric Avenue.

Speaker 3 And then we'll take it higher.

Speaker 3 Oh, we're gonna run down to Electric. Pardon my time.

Speaker 3 Welcome to Part of My Take presented by the Cash App.

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You get $10 for free, $10 to the ASPCA. Today is Friday, November 6th.

Speaker 4 And the 49ers had a lot of injuries, okay, guys? Like, what do you want them to do? That wasn't a real win. The 49ers had a lot of injuries.
That game sucked. America lost.

Speaker 5 It felt like a preseason game, didn't it?

Speaker 4 It really did.

Speaker 5 It felt like week four of the preseason, and you're like yelling at Matt LaFleur for having Aaron Rodgers out there needlessly. The Aaron Rodgers did need to.

Speaker 5 This would have been the perfect time for Jordan Love to get out there, get some reps. In my conspiracy theorist, Tinfoil Hat says Aaron Rodgers could be kibosh on that.

Speaker 4 Yeah, he wouldn't even see the field. We had a moment, it was the River Craycraft moment where we thought the 49ers were going to tie it up 7-7, and

Speaker 4 the nation held their breath and waiting in suspense, hoping that we'd have a touchdown and a decent Thursday night football game. It got overturned and it was never the same since.

Speaker 4 From that point forward, it was just a terrible game. Nick Mullins turns out maybe not so good.
Still like him. Still think he's a good dude.
Still would probably take him on the Bears.

Speaker 4 No questions asked. But yeah, Aaron Rodgers, Packers.

Speaker 4 I'll say this though, and people are going to say I'm nitpicking. I think Aaron Rodgers look a little tired.
I think he needs a little sleep. I think he's got little bags under his eyes.

Speaker 4 Maybe he needs to smile a little bit more.

Speaker 5 I think he's been up watching cable news.

Speaker 4 That's what I think.

Speaker 5 Taking too close of notice to politics. I want a quarterback that doesn't know what a television is.
Aaron Rodgers,

Speaker 5 he also shaved. I don't know if you noticed that.
He's like a little babyface out there. I'm not really wanting to talk about bad facial hair, but I don't know.

Speaker 5 Aaron Rodgers, he had like a beard mustache thing going for the the last three years now all of a sudden he decides to go clean shaven sounds like you know it's like when britney spears shaved her head when she was having a nervous breakdown some people do that they just say you know what i'm going to cut my banks marsha clark did it in the oj trial yeah rogers going through a mental crisis right now we don't or did he or did he just lose to kirk cousins um so yeah this game sucked and i was promised some kevin white kevin white never really appeared i they're they're limiting his snap count for some reason i don't understand it well he's also, he's been on the practice squad, letting him develop a little bit.

Speaker 4 Yeah, he's getting some reps. But yeah, it was all in all, a terrible game.

Speaker 4 Just

Speaker 4 this, this actually, you know what? We needed the wake-up call of like, hey, remember, remember when Thursday night football, everyone complained about Thursday night football?

Speaker 4 This was a throwback to that because we've had a few good Thursday night football games, even when the Jets played on Thursday night football is kind of entertaining.

Speaker 4 But now we have a throwback and

Speaker 4 the Packers are back to

Speaker 4 like good status better than good status but i don't know how much you can take away from a game where the 49ers were playing like

Speaker 4 everyone from their practice squad and and then some river craycall craycraft which is a made-up name well that's a name that i would think of if i'm like imagining a football game in a dream

Speaker 5 I would be like, oh, yeah, River Craycraft went out there, threw for 400 yards and five tutters.

Speaker 4 Pretty sick.

Speaker 5 Yeah. I had him on my bench.

Speaker 4 Yeah, it's like a it's like a gibberish name. It's a name that you hear and you're like, wait, what did you just say? Reggie

Speaker 4 Crawford? What did you say? That's what it is. Yeah.
So, yeah, when you hear it, you scream.

Speaker 5 He sounds like a good guy, like with a name like River Craycraft. It sounds like a solid hang, a guy that would probably come over, play some poker, not interview too much.

Speaker 5 He looked like a River Craycraft, too. I had no idea what a River Craycraft would look like, but then I saw him and I was like, that makes sense.
That's him. That's the guy.

Speaker 4 River Craycraft. Billy, had any thoughts on the game tonight?

Speaker 4 You're very close to the camera. I kind of like it.
It's like you're like a camboy.

Speaker 4 And his mic's off. So that was Billy's thoughts on

Speaker 4 CJ.

Speaker 5 I want to see if C.J. Bethard gets in because he's pretty electric.

Speaker 4 Yeah. Is he? I mean, what from

Speaker 4 I think the

Speaker 6 days in Iowa? I mean, he beat Michigan in that like crazy game.

Speaker 4 Like, I just want to

Speaker 5 put up 150 yards when they put him in at the end of the other game.

Speaker 4 That was the game that brought our friend Trent to New York City.

Speaker 3 Yeah, I know. Yep.

Speaker 5 I do want to give a shout out to Greg Kittle. He's saying that, like, Greg does not pay attention to doctors.

Speaker 5 He does not care if you have a white lab coat or initials after your name, or even if you went to college. They tell him you're going to be out for eight weeks.

Speaker 5 And Greg is like, yeah, it's going to be two.

Speaker 5 Just make it, make it two weeks for my foot. It'll be fine.
Trust me.

Speaker 4 And you know what? I believe him. I believe him.
I believe him. I really believe him.

Speaker 5 It's going to be two weeks max.

Speaker 3 I think by thinking, he's going to be catching touchdowns on the weekend of Thanksgiving.

Speaker 4 Yes, absolutely. So we actually made,

Speaker 4 we're recording this right now on Zoom. We have the rest of the show in person.
We made the actually genius decision to all go home and do the first five minutes after the game.

Speaker 4 That was genius because this is one of those games that if we had stayed at the office till 1130 at night, we would have felt like such assholes watching this take place. So let's do it.

Speaker 5 We're starting to like yell at each other. We probably would have had to order two dinners just to keep ourselves occupied.

Speaker 4 Right. So should we get though? Should we do it? Should we do the weekend preview? So we got weekend preview coming up.
We got Fantasy Fuckboys. We got AJ Soprano.

Speaker 4 We got a hilarious Fire Fest where we get into some weird shit. Awesome stuff coming up and it's all in person.
Should we do it? Let's get it.

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Speaker 3 Okay, weekend preview time. Let's do it.
How are we feeling? I like this card. It's not bad.
We've got a couple games of the week.

Speaker 3 I'm interested to see what happens in Seattle Buffalo. Seattle Buffalo is going to be great.

Speaker 3 We also have that Saturday night Notre Dame Clemson game, which I'm just adding to the week nine card. That's just an extra addition.
That's a bonus NFL game. Yeah, that's a bonus NFL game.

Speaker 3 But it is a good weekend. We got a couple games at 1 o'clock, a couple games at 4 o'clock.

Speaker 3 Cardinals and Dolphins are going to be,

Speaker 3 it's not prime time, but that should be the game that everyone's going to be like, ooh, let's watch this at 4 o'clock. You know what, though? For some reason, I'm thinking ahead to like 7.30 p.m.

Speaker 3 on Sunday. And whichever team loses that game, I'm going to write off in my head as not being for real.
Yes. Even though

Speaker 3 I think both teams are

Speaker 3 both pretty good. Decent-ish.
Yeah, playoff capable.

Speaker 3 Yeah, capable of possibly going to the playoffs.

Speaker 3 All right. So let's start.
We'll start. We're going to go through every game.

Speaker 3 Quick hitters. Broncos, Falcons, Drew Locke, can he bounce back from an unbelievable win?

Speaker 3 That's really what defines if you're a good franchise quarterback. Can the highs, can you come back from the highs and the lows? Because that was a high.

Speaker 3 I've updated the Drew Locke Moximeter again midweek this time. Drew Locke has now advanced to a guy that can win you a game.

Speaker 3 So we can win with Drew Locke. Okay.
Yeah, we can win with Drew Locke. Who knows with the Falcons? The Falcons,

Speaker 3 if they're going to do what they did last year, which they are very capable of doing just because they still have talent, now would be the time.

Speaker 3 And by that, I mean win a bunch of meaningless games when they're already out of it to screw up the draft pick.

Speaker 3 Because that's really like the full Falcons sadness is that, where it's you're bad, but then you get a little bit good so that you can't be really, really bad. You're never bad enough to be good.

Speaker 3 Right. If you want to be good eventually in the NFL, you have to be bad.
Right.

Speaker 3 That's what Hank is telling himself himself that he's going through with the patriots right now right this they're actually this is the patriots best season because they're getting great yeah the long term by being so bad right now remember it's bill belich's best coaching job it is and also i've heard this like take start to percolate behind the scenes a little bit that belichek knew that this season was going to be a garbage season that was going to get thrown away by the history books and forgotten as being like a fake season yeah so he knew that six months ago And so he's planned accordingly and tanking.

Speaker 3 He's been tanking on purpose this entire time.

Speaker 3 And Keyshawn Johnson threw out the idea that the Jets would trade the first pick to the Patriots for Trevor Lawrence, like so they could draft Trevor Lawrence. That was Keyshawn's big take this week.

Speaker 3 Which, yeah, I don't know.

Speaker 3 It was basically like they love Sam Darnold. They're going to trade Trevor Lawrence.

Speaker 3 All I took away from the take from Keyshawn, and this is a place as someone who struggles with his weight, you never want to be in going viral with your face looking fat.

Speaker 3 Because Keyshawn, your face was looking fat. Yeah.
And that sucked. Because I saw it and I was like, whoa, Keyshawn needs a bucket of ice.
Like, he needs to put his face in some ice water right now.

Speaker 3 Yeah, it looks like he got stung by a bunch of murder hornets, actually. So he, um, yeah, he's always had kind of a fat face, though.
Yeah.

Speaker 3 But the problem with Keyshawn is sometimes when he gets a little on the chubbier side, his cheeks migrate down to his neck. Yeah.
So his neck gets cheeks and jowls on the side of it. Well, this is.

Speaker 3 And that makes you just look, it looks like you're squeezing like a bunch of flesh-colored toothpaste out of a tube.

Speaker 3 And this is why being a professional athlete is overrated because eventually you won't be a professional athlete and you'll probably gain a little weight and everyone will be like, ooh, you look fat, even though he's not fat, but he's fat in comparison to a professional athlete.

Speaker 3 So that's why I never went pro. Yeah, exactly.
Just stay

Speaker 3 all your life. So no one will be like, ooh, you look fat.
I want to back up real quick. You said that the Jets, you said that he said that the Jets are going to trade

Speaker 3 the number one pick to the Patriots. I would appreciate that just for safekeeping.
Old time's sake. I just don't want to see the Jets screw up another really good player.

Speaker 3 Just right when the Jets are about to take a step forward, they make sure that the Patriots take two steps forward. Well, yeah,

Speaker 3 I'm going there. If you don't have your shit together in life, now's not the time to be going out and adopting the cutest puppy in the world.
Right.

Speaker 3 I'd rather see you rehome that puppy to your more stable neighbors. You know, like if you're smoking meth in your garage, give it to your neighbors that at least have a full-time job.

Speaker 3 And Joe Douglas, now we're just talking too much Jets because they're playing Monday night football. But Joe Douglas did say that Adam Gace is safe.
I think they should extend him.

Speaker 3 Well, no, Joe Douglas has figured out, I mean, we've touched on this, but he has realized that keeping Adam Gase is the smartest thing you can do as a GM because one, he's torturing him and no one likes Adam Gase.

Speaker 3 I can tell you, I've never met the guy, but I can tell you no one likes him. And two,

Speaker 3 it actually, Adam Gace is your tank, like he is your tank, but not tanking. You can't be accused of tanking, but you are tanking when you have Adam Gase out there.
He's basically Cameron.

Speaker 3 He's the Cameron Payne of the NFL. You just throw him out there and let him do his thing, and you'll be like, well, at least we tried.
No, you didn't try. You had Adam Gates as your coach.

Speaker 3 Yeah, I think that the Jets should extend him. I think you've got to bring Adam Gase back for at least one more year, maybe two.
Yep. All right, Seahawks, Bills.

Speaker 3 This is a game we talked about that's going to be a great one o'clock game. I want to squat on a take, a pre-take.

Speaker 3 So Carlos Dunlap traded to the Seahawks. Jamal Adams is going to be back.

Speaker 3 I think that the Seahawks defense is going to start turning a corner here, playing well, and it's going to take a little bit of time for people to catch up to it.

Speaker 3 But, like, in like three, four weeks, we're going to be sitting here being like, you know, who's really playing well? The Seahawks defense.

Speaker 3 I think that if the Seahawks can get out to an early lead, they could, that's a team that like can still get after the quarterback, I think, if they know that you're going to be passing the ball.

Speaker 3 Well, Carlos Sinlop should help, and Jamal Adams definitely will help because he's one of the best safeties in the league. But

Speaker 3 I just think that this in complimentary football is important that the Seahawks' offense is so good, it puts pressure on the other teams' offense to try to score points all the time.

Speaker 3 So,

Speaker 3 I just feel it's going to happen, and there's going to be a perception out there that the Seahawks' defense sucks in like five weeks, even though they won't suck anymore.

Speaker 3 But this game, to me, this is a big test for the Bills because the Bills, let's be honest, we love Josh Allen, we love Bills Mafia.

Speaker 3 Any Bills fan would tell you they have not looked good. They have not looked good.
Like, they've looked okay. They, you know, even they beat the the Patriots by three.
That wasn't a unbelievable win.

Speaker 3 They beat the Jets by eight after not being able to get in the Reds, you know, kicking field goals instead of touchdowns. They lost to the Chiefs.
They lost to who else? The Titan? No.

Speaker 3 Yeah, the Titans. So they're two and two in their last four, and the two wins have not been like, oh man, the Bills look like they did in September.
So this is a chance for them.

Speaker 3 to maybe recapture that by having a big win if they can get it. It's an R U for real game for both sides.

Speaker 3 And I think that I'm very excited to watch Josh Allen play against Seattle because what often gets overlooked is in order for Seattle to play in these most fucked up games that are like extremely exciting that always come down to the wire have incredible plays in them there's two sides that coin other teams have to kind of match the Seahawks level of insanity I'm very very excited to see how Josh Allen is going to step up to the plate yeah and do something weird exciting maybe fucked up awesome maybe awesome who knows definitely awesome definitely awesome he's going to try to do something awesome yes and something crazy is going to happen from Josh Allen's feet or hands in this game because it is against the Seahawks.

Speaker 3 And by law, you have to do something. I don't know.
He's going to accidentally throw a pass off his dick and convert it for a first down. Done.
Something like that is going to happen this weekend.

Speaker 3 I could not be more excited to watch this game. A little stat for you, too.

Speaker 3 The Seahawks have the best record going west to east in the last three years. So they're 9-0 going west to east.
It's tough to go west to east. It's tough to go west to east.

Speaker 3 Little Marshawn Lynch revenge game right here. Yeah.
Marshawn Lynch thinking that Buffalo is in New York City, all-time press conference. If you've never seen it.

Speaker 3 Yeah, and then he got off the plane and there was snow and he was like, what is the fuck is this? What have I gotten myself into right now? It sucks.

Speaker 3 It's going to be 60 degrees and sunny in Buffalo this weekend. Yeah, but points.
But points. Points.
Bears, Titans. Bears got the Coco.

Speaker 3 So that sucks. Also, the Bears.

Speaker 3 I have now just tweeted this name a couple times just randomly with nothing else attached to it because it just makes me laugh.

Speaker 3 But the Bears are potentially starting an offensive lineman named Arlington Hambright.

Speaker 3 So we are, the Bears are now at the like season 15 of their Madden franchise, and we're just creating players out of nothing and slapping the faceless logo on them, being like, here's Arlington Hambright.

Speaker 3 He's got a smooth head. Yeah.
Just like no eyebrows whatsoever, just flat cheeks. I am squatting on this take.
I think that's it. I still stinks you.
And it's crazy. I think he still stinks.

Speaker 3 I think Ryan Tannehill still stinks. I don't have anything beyond my eyes that tell me that he still stinks.
Because there is nothing.

Speaker 3 It's my guts.

Speaker 3 It's my guts that are telling me that he still stinks. I just, I still don't trust him.
I've never trusted Ryan Tannehill.

Speaker 3 And I think that he's been really, really good for the last year, year and a half.

Speaker 3 He's been great. You want to know how good he is? He's been great.
Don't get me wrong. Ryan Tannehill is a great quarterback, but I still think that he stinks.
In

Speaker 3 the last year and a half, since Ryan Tannehill came in. Since Ryan Tannehill became good,

Speaker 3 he's just been delaying the stinking.

Speaker 3 He is second in offensive passing efficiency only behind Patrick Mahomes. And he is second in completion percentage over expected only behind Russell Wilson.
Those are too many numbers.

Speaker 3 Those are too many numbers. Percentage completion over expected.
Yeah. I don't know.
That's the number. Is there like a guy in a room that's like, I expect him to make this throw? He did.

Speaker 3 No, I do not expect him to make a throw. No, it's a Drew Brees stat because it's Drew Brees just throws it for for three yards.

Speaker 3 So it takes into account Yak. Yeah,

Speaker 3 also air yards, I think. So in other words, he passes the ball to his receiver.

Speaker 3 And then they immediately get tackled. He's really good is what the answer is.
Their defense sucks.

Speaker 3 And so the only thing that makes me feel a little okay going into this game is that if the Titans' defense can't get a sack on the Bengals, maybe Arlington Hambright won't be so bad. Okay.
Maybe.

Speaker 3 Okay. And that is how I have sold myself on this defense.
What position does he play?

Speaker 3 I think he's a guard. Maybe a tackle.
If he's a guard, that's okay. Because you can give him help.
Yeah. Count on Matt Nagy to really get the protection schemes together for Arlington Hambright.

Speaker 3 The problem is the entire offensive line is basically hurt or has the Coco. So

Speaker 3 it's going to be a bad scene. It's going to be a bad scene.
I don't really know.

Speaker 3 He's a tackle.

Speaker 3 I think he's the right tackle. So yeah, that's going to be, I don't know.

Speaker 3 And so the other stat I had was Matt Nagy can't figure figure out his play calling because he is like top of the league in passing in first down, which is, as Warren Sharp always tells us, is smart.

Speaker 3 And then he is like

Speaker 3 the worst at throwing on second and third down. So he basically is smart on first down, and then he's like, oh, I did my pass.
Let me be stupid now. Let's go back to the run game.

Speaker 3 So he probably runs the shit out of the ball on second down after they... have an incompletion on first down.

Speaker 3 I think what we're finding out about Matt Nagy, the play caller, is he is essentially our level of intelligence when it comes to understanding analytics.

Speaker 3 So we take away, whenever we have Warren Sharp on, he gives us a bunch of information and we take away one or two things.

Speaker 3 12 personnel is one running back, two tight ends. Right.
Or pass on first down. That's good.
All the time. That's Matt Nagie.
He's like, pass on first down is good. What's next?

Speaker 3 Okay. I've mastered that.
I've done it. Yeah.
Can we just get to another first down so I can pass again? And then I've checked my box of analytics.

Speaker 3 I just can't wait to be vindicated on the fact that Ryan Tannehill eventually will start. Oh, yes.
Eventually going to like he's going to get old. Yeah.
And then I'll be right.

Speaker 3 No, he's been good, though. Ravens, Colts.
Don't get me wrong. I agree.
Ryan Tannehill has been good, but I still think he stinks. Yeah.

Speaker 3 But that's

Speaker 3 the kindly upon this take.

Speaker 3 All right. Ravens, Colts.

Speaker 3 I don't know. I mean,

Speaker 3 the Ravens should win this game. They have a bunch of injuries.
Marlon Humphrey,

Speaker 3 he tweeted, he announced his coronavirus by saying, I got the Rona, which I like that. It's kind of taking it away from Schefter.

Speaker 3 Schefter,

Speaker 3 can we just talk for a second that, like, Schefter and Rapaport and all these

Speaker 3 reporters are basically getting free retweets and likes from coronavirus news? It's bullshit. When they do the tweet every Sunday morning, like,

Speaker 3 no new positives,

Speaker 3 I see what you're doing.

Speaker 3 You are benefiting off coronavirus. Yeah, he's a war profiteer.

Speaker 3 That's exactly what it is. These are blood tweets.
And listen, it's not just one tweet on Sunday morning. No.

Speaker 3 Schefter is not afraid to go through it team by team. Right.
Being like, remember that guy that I told you you got put on the COVID list on Wednesday? Yep. Still out this weekend.
Like I told you.

Speaker 3 It's essentially tweeting, I love football every time, which, you know, we've, we've, we do that every now and then, which is. Oh, but I just do it because I love football.

Speaker 3 But we also know that it will do numbers. But he does it every time, every Sunday, because he just knows

Speaker 3 I got the numbers. When I wake up in the morning on Sunday and I tweet out the picture of the new 2020 NFL officially approved league ball, I do that because I'm genuinely excited.

Speaker 3 You see that ball on my television. Absolutely.
Adam Schefter, yeah, you're right. He just, I think he makes extra calls to figure out the Coco numbers.
He's taking advantage. Yep.
I don't like it.

Speaker 3 All right. What about the league office? Have we heard,

Speaker 3 has the league office been clean on Coco numbers? Or is Adam Shafter's going to

Speaker 3 report anything like that? Come on. Just keeping that in-house.
Yeah.

Speaker 3 Panthers are Chiefs. Chiefs are going to win.
Yep.

Speaker 3 The Panthers had a nice moment. We gave them their love.
If you go back to like week five or six, we gave Teddy Bridgewater his love. Who we still respect.
And we still respect, but I feel like the

Speaker 3 air has come out of the balloon a little bit with the Panthers season where it's like, oh, maybe

Speaker 3 they were playing well, they're playing nice, and yeah, maybe they're not so good. What's the problem with having a new coach?

Speaker 3 who needs to rebuild basically the entire roster besides Christian McCaffrey, who might be back. Who might be back.

Speaker 3 But this is the problem with bringing in a competent new head coach is that you're not going to be bad enough to get good, like we were talking about earlier.

Speaker 3 Matt Ruhl, since there's no, like, uh, there's no tape really on what he's going to do as an NFL head coach, and most NFL coaches are too dumb to go back and look at the body of evidence that you have on Matt Rule from college.

Speaker 3 Right. Um, but there's not enough tape for them to get, to get really acclimated to him.

Speaker 3 So he's going to be a decent head coach, and they're going to have like a six and ten record, eight and eight record in his first year.

Speaker 3 And then he's kind of going to screw himself over for the long-term rebuild. Right.
And by the way, our

Speaker 3 theory that when a good player goes out or is traded, the team does better. I think we called the Christian doctrine.
It actually was confirmed by, I can't remember where I saw it.

Speaker 3 It was a couple of weeks ago, but someone who played in the league confirmed it and was like, yeah, it's true because when a defense plans and you know Christian McCaffrey's out there, you know he's going to touch the ball like half the time.

Speaker 3 When he's not, you don't know where the ball's going. So, you know, stopping him is still hard, but yeah, we're smart.
We had our fingers on the Christian doctrine.

Speaker 3 Bryce is wrong. I was actually talking to somebody that runs closely in NBA circles the other day, and he was saying that you can actually go back to the business.
You can just say LeBron.

Speaker 3 He was listening to our show, and he said, you know what that made me think of? Back on the 90s Knicks, when they lost Patrick Ewing, they got really good.

Speaker 3 And he's like, that's incredible that you were able to kind of deduce that from Christian McCaffrey. Now he's going back and applying it to all sorts of sports from the 90s.

Speaker 3 He even made like a couple 80s New Kids on the Block references, Teen Wolf references about how that can be applied even to things outside of sports. It was

Speaker 3 think about that. That's smart.

Speaker 3 All right, Lions, Vikings, Matt Ryan, or sorry, Matt Stafford has the Coco, maybe. So he might be out.

Speaker 3 And this is actually, so I've been talking up the Lions little itty-bitty baby run. I actually think that this is two little itty-bitty baby runs converging here.

Speaker 3 And whoever wins will be the champion of the little bitty itty baby run.

Speaker 3 I mean,

Speaker 3 this is tailor-made for Kirk Cousins. Not only is it against the Lions, it's at home.

Speaker 3 It's at 1 o'clock on a Sunday, and Creed is reuniting. So he is going to be fucking pumped up this weekend.
Four touchdowns, 280 yards for Kirk Cousins this Sunday.

Speaker 3 And the Vikings, so they play the Bears next Monday night. Obviously, I'm going to say that's a loss for them.
But the next three games after that, Cowboys, Panthers, Jaguars, all at home.

Speaker 3 So the Vikings might be our little bitty, bitty baby run team.

Speaker 3 Was I premature to dunchain them in the preseason? No, I just think one of the winner of this team will come away with the late November, early December. Watch out for this team.

Speaker 3 They're a team that you don't want to play if you're gearing up for a playoff run.

Speaker 3 I hope, I think we're going to get Chase Daniel

Speaker 3 on Sunday, which it's just fun to remind everyone that Chase Daniel has seven touchdown passes in the NFL. He's been in the league for 11 years, and he's made $37 million.
King. The finesse God.

Speaker 3 And he's also the only quarterback that has a complete sentence for a name. Right, exactly.
But he is the finesse god, our finesse god.

Speaker 3 Giants, Washington football team. Ugh.

Speaker 3 This is Washington football team's itty-bitty baby run. They have a one-week ittyty-bitty baby run coming up.

Speaker 3 It's right now.

Speaker 3 Have you seen this?

Speaker 3 It was either a tweet or a graphic that was going around that essentially was like Daniel Jones and Jamarcus Russell are the same player in terms of turnovers.

Speaker 3 And everyone's like, like, look at how biased the media is being like not giving Daniel Jones the same shit. And now there is bias in the media.

Speaker 3 And if you want to claim, you know, racial bias in terms of quarterbacks, I would agree with you. But in this case,

Speaker 3 are people forgetting that when Daniel Jones was drafted, we all shit on him. Like, he's been shit on since day one.

Speaker 3 Jamarcus Russell was the number one pick overall and supposed to be incredible and ended up being bad.

Speaker 3 I don't think anyone thought besides David Gettleman that Daniel Jones was going to be incredible.

Speaker 3 Yeah.

Speaker 3 yeah he had that comeback against the bucks that skewed me for a while i have not heard that take that is a that is a blustering take that seen it's been going around yeah he needs to put on i would actually like daniel jones a lot if you put on a shitload of weight do you know if he put on like a solid 50 pounds around the midsection fatten that face out a little bit i think you'd find a lot more people willing to root for him do you know what that take has been uh the phrase i think it's uh bring that same energy Okay.

Speaker 3 Bring that same energy when talking about Daniel Jones. I will bring, you know what I will? I will bring that exact same energy.
Starting this weekend, Daniel Jones, I'm going to run with that.

Speaker 3 He is Demarcus Russell 2.0.

Speaker 3 Yeah, anyone who, like, do we not remember the Giants fans losing their mind when they drafted him and the gettleman drafted a guy from Duke who he probably could have gotten like 20 picks later?

Speaker 3 We all shit on it. Also,

Speaker 3 you can say that there are racial implications. I'll let somebody else have that discussion.
I'm just going to say that like straight up, Daniel Jones is the least Louisiana person in the world. Yes.

Speaker 3 You will find nobody less fewer Louisiana than Daniel Jones is. Daniel Jones' swag is no swag.
Yeah, Daniel Jones would go to bed at 10 o'clock on Mardi Gras if he was visiting New Orleans.

Speaker 3 Absolutely. Yes.
He'd be like, I've had enough. No more hurricanes.
All right, Texans, Jaguars. Jake Lutton, baby.
Yeah. Jake Lutton.
Is it Lutton or Luton? I don't know. I'm saying Lutton.

Speaker 3 Because I was going to say Luton-free. Let's get that breath.
Find it, Jake.

Speaker 3 I

Speaker 3 love

Speaker 3 what Doug Marone's doing here. Did you see the quotes? Doug Marone, essentially, I'm paraphrasing our friend Doug Marone, essentially was like, I'm getting fired.
I don't care.

Speaker 3 Let's see what the kid's got. We know what Mike Glennon is.
He sucks. Let's see what this kid's got.

Speaker 3 I fucking love it because that is the way, like, Doug Marone is going out the way that every coach should go out and not, like, scared and, like, hey, let's have Mike Glennon go out there and punt the ball 15 times.

Speaker 3 No, let's see if this fucking kid from Oregon State can do anything. Probably can't, but if he can, why not?

Speaker 3 So when they had that conversation last year, after Doug Marone got fired, cried, kept his job, in that room, do you think the deal was made?

Speaker 3 Like, Doug, we will keep you around for another year so that we can get a great head coach to replace you, knowing that we're going to have a high draft pick and be in a good spot for rebuilding.

Speaker 3 And Doug was just basically like, I will be... your bitch next year.
I will be that dude. I'll do it.

Speaker 3 I'll be your simp.

Speaker 3 I'll be the dude on the sidelines sidelines that looks like he's coaching. But we have a handshake arrangement that we're going to tank next year.

Speaker 3 And as long as those checks keep cashing, I still have a job, I will be your guy because he's just a fucking good-ass dude. Yeah, he's a good ass dude.

Speaker 3 Doug Marone is a he's just a good friend to have. I'm sure that the Jags front office like him as a person.
Yep. And so, yeah, more power to him if that's what he's doing.
Jake Lutton

Speaker 3 Lieutenant. Luton.

Speaker 3 Lutan Clan ain't nothing.

Speaker 3 Luth T-E-N is the pronunciation.

Speaker 3 Yeah, Lutan Clan. Lutan.
I like that. Lutan.
Lutan.

Speaker 3 Lutton. I like Lutton.
He's a Lutton for punishment. I think if he plays well, that's a Lutton.
Yeah. If he's stinky, then he's Lutan.
Lutan. But, yeah, let's give it a shot.
But I do.

Speaker 3 I miss seeing Glennon and his neck just bobble out there in a game.

Speaker 3 I need one of those a year. How much does it suck to be Mike Glennon for Doug Marone to be like, yeah, he actually said it's like, we know what Mike Glennon is, and he sucks.

Speaker 3 How much money did the Bears give him? A lot.

Speaker 3 It was like 20 million, I think, but not all guaranteed.

Speaker 3 I've said it before, but I was all, there was a month, two-month time where I was all in on Mike Lennon. All, all in.

Speaker 3 I remember vividly listening to the Cubs game on the radio when Mike Lennon threw out the first pitch and went up to the booth for an inning to just talk. And I was like, this guy, this is our guy.

Speaker 3 He's got

Speaker 3 one.

Speaker 3 He's $1,187,500. No, no, no, not for the Bears.
Oh, Mike Lennon.

Speaker 3 Yeah,

Speaker 3 they're just all for the Bears. Yeah, they backed up the banks.
They gave him like $20 million,

Speaker 3 two years, something like that. Two years for $45 million.
Oh, wow. But how much did they end up paying him?

Speaker 3 What website are you on? Spotrack. Yeah.
It should say what they ended up paying him. Just see signing bonus, average salary, guaranteed at sign, total guarantee.
What was it guaranteed at sign?

Speaker 3 $18,500.

Speaker 3 That's what it was. What do you think Mike Lennon spent his signing bonus on? Like the big purchase that he made with that? He's like, I finally made it.

Speaker 3 I feel like maybe

Speaker 3 someone to sit on his head so his neck got smaller. Yeah.

Speaker 3 I was going to say he re-upholstered a couch.

Speaker 3 I got a really nice fabric on it. He just

Speaker 3 giving a guy like that $18 million, it's nice tool shed. Give it to somebody who's going to blow it on something entertaining.
Like Chase Daniels. Like Chase Daniels.
Yeah. All right.

Speaker 3 Wait, I had one more question here. When I saw Jake Luton's name, Lutton, it made me think, did Sam Bradford just fall off a cliff?

Speaker 3 This feels like the perfect landing spot. Somebody should have given Sam Bradford $15 million.

Speaker 3 I know. I think he's retired.
His arm ended. Yes.

Speaker 3 It expired. Yeah.
But forever a legend, he had that record. He did.
Completion percentage.

Speaker 3 All right. We still don't know who won that trade.
Yeah, no, no. We'll be debating that one for years.

Speaker 3 We don't. Raiders, Chargers.
This game's going to be fun. That's all I got.
This game's going to be fun. I'm excited for this game.
It's got chaos written all over it.

Speaker 3 Both these teams, a late afternoon Raiders-Chargers game has to get weird. It just has to.

Speaker 3 We will tune in it. It will be like 6.45, and something weird is going to be happening.
The late slate isn't great. No,

Speaker 3 Miami, Arizona is going to be interesting. Well, here's, and we'll go to the next game.

Speaker 3 The late slate is doing, the NFL loves to do this where no matter how good or bad the national teams are, quote unquote, they're like, let's throw them together.

Speaker 3 Steelers, Cowboys, throw them together. Yeah.
People will watch. You know what? And people will watch because it's colors, it's history, it's everything.

Speaker 3 And it sucks. This game sucks.
I will watch just because I'm very excited to see Dallas lose by 45 points. Well, I got a little stat for you, PFT.
I don't think they're going to lose by 45 points.

Speaker 3 They're not starting Ben DiNutri. We know they're starting Cooper Rush, Maxion Baby, Central Michigan, Bahamas Bull.

Speaker 3 So I had a little thought in my head. I was like, I feel like Mike Tomlin is a big-time play to your competition coach.

Speaker 3 And looked it up over the last, or his entire career as a Steelers head coach. He is 1-9 against the spread as a road favorite over 10 points.

Speaker 3 What are the Cowboys against the spread, though? Aren't they like 0-9? They're 0-8 with 0-8. They would actually break the record if they go 0-9.

Speaker 3 So it's like the unstoppable force versus the immovable object.

Speaker 3 The opposite. Yeah.
The very movable object against the continuously moving force. Right.
So I just know that if this game, the Steelers are going to win.

Speaker 3 But if this game is weirdly close, I wouldn't be shocked.

Speaker 3 And you know what? It makes sense, too. Like, Mike Tomlin is kind of a rah-rah guy.
And Ben, Big Ben, is a very relatable, like, oh, I'll do it later, procrastinator kind of guy.

Speaker 3 So he's probably like, well, we'll beat the Cowboys, and then they'll start losing. Like, well, we'll beat him later.

Speaker 3 You know what I mean? Yeah, we'll get him in the second half. Yeah, we'll just do it later.

Speaker 3 Like, don't worry about it. Big Ben's going to treat his body like an amusement park this weekend.
Just get back on the porn. Probably watch too much of it on the road in the hotel at Dallas.

Speaker 3 No supervision there. Wake up in the morning.

Speaker 3 I don't think

Speaker 3 I can't, in good conscience, bet on the Cowboys because they're 0-8 against the spread. I have to root for history.
I have to be a part of history, Big Cat.

Speaker 3 I'm sorry that you are willing to overlook this pivotal moment in time that we're all sharing as Americans when a team can go 0-8 against this or 0-9 against the spread to start a season.

Speaker 3 I need to be a part of that.

Speaker 3 I'm in a phase right now where I'm just love betting really bad teams. So it will probably only last for another week, but this is prime, prime.
14 points? Come on. I love betting bad teams.

Speaker 3 Give it to me. And under most circumstances, I think I would probably bet on the Cowboys.
I bet on the Cowboys last weekend. Yeah.
I bet on Ben DiNucci. Who, by the way,

Speaker 3 is a perfect segue. We're nailing these segues.
By the way, statistically speaking, Ben DiNucci was not the worst quarterback last week. It was Tua.

Speaker 3 Really? Yes, Ben DiNucci was technically better than Tua. Well, Tua went like two for seven.
Yep. Is that right? Yeah, Tua went 12 for 22, 93 yards.
Ben DiNucci went 21 for 40, 180 yards.

Speaker 3 I'm just saying. So the

Speaker 3 Gucci DiNucci, not as bad. There was something about DiNucci where his passes were so bad that they couldn't pick him off.
Yeah. The defensive backs were like, this is a prank.

Speaker 3 You're pranking me with this easy interception right now.

Speaker 3 He threw probably four or five passes that could have been picks or pick sixes easily and none of them got intercepted right easily um all right so this game this is gonna be a like you said a like will a good ish like who's who's capable of going to the playoffs whoever wins this game is capable of going to the playoffs dolphins or cardinals and we'll see

Speaker 3 Tua looks shorter in the NFL than he did in college. Yeah, and Kyler is, every time Kyler fucks up, I'm convinced that's his height.

Speaker 3 Like, I'm very much like, oh, that that was a short pull. He's too tall.

Speaker 3 No, no.

Speaker 3 When he's playing well, he's tall. When he's playing poorly, he's short.
Didn't we run the numbers on his eyes?

Speaker 3 We need to get one of those new iPhone cameras that we can tell somebody his true height, but just use it on Kyler's eyes because

Speaker 3 it only really matters how tall your eyes are. That's true.
Anything above that is wasted space. That's true.
So

Speaker 3 I feel like his eyes might be... taller than his body is, like too tall for his frame.
Okay. But Tua.
Circle that. I'm going to circle that and come back to it.
But Tua, just maybe it's the colors.

Speaker 3 Maybe it's the Miami Dolphins colors. But he looks a little shorter than advertised.
Yes, yes. All right.
Last game, Saints and Bucks, Sunday Night Football. Maybe Jameis.

Speaker 3 Maybe Jameis. So Drew Brees got a little injury.
Also, supposed to be kind of some bad weather wind, which I'm rooting for.

Speaker 3 I'm rooting for Tom Brady and Drew Brees to have a game in like fierce, fierce winds and see whose arm strength is falling off more. Are we going to get Antonio Brown this weekend?

Speaker 3 Is he clear to play? I think he is, right?

Speaker 3 Is Antonio Brown?

Speaker 3 They're like best friends, huh?

Speaker 3 The roommates. I've got to take him.

Speaker 3 I think they're in love with each other.

Speaker 3 I think they're dating. Hold on.
Yep.

Speaker 3 I think. Sorry, I missed that.

Speaker 3 Siri, I said that I think that Antonio Brown and Tom Brady are fucking. I think Tom Brady is more in love with Antonio Brown than Antonio Brown is in love with Tom Brady.
Oh, really?

Speaker 3 I think it's a prove-it thing.

Speaker 3 I think Tom Brady's Tom Brady is smitten with within. So Tom Brady is, and this is a credit to him as a competitor.
He knows he's like,

Speaker 3 I only got like 10 more years until he's like 53 to play in the NFL. If someone can help him win a title, he doesn't care.

Speaker 3 He'll have the whole roster live at his house if he can win a Super Bowl. Rip, but no one's asking Tom Brady, hey, can you shelter Antonio Brown while he's on the table?

Speaker 3 Like Tom Brady, he moved to Tampa. He was looking at houses, and he was like silently walking around the house with a realtor, imagining to himself, yeah, I could see Antonio

Speaker 3 They're Jeter's house, mind you. Yeah.
Yeah.

Speaker 3 How does Giselle factor into this roommate situation? I don't know if she gets a choice.

Speaker 3 It's weird. It's messy.
I mean, love is love. I'm not going to, I'm not slut-shaming anybody here, but I think that, I think there's something behind the scenes between those two.

Speaker 3 I also think he wants to prove to Belichuk and Kraft, like

Speaker 3 he was right. Antonio Brown is a good move.
Yeah. Yes, I would agree with that.
Do you think Antonio Brown's like sneaking out of Tom Brady's house at night?

Speaker 3 Like tying bed sheets together and then climbing down from the window. Probably.
Going out and being like he's suffocating me. Yeah, meeting with Tommy.
He's rumping his gym.

Speaker 3 Yeah, all he wants to do is

Speaker 3 watch film and chill. Yeah.
He keeps asking me to come and watch film and get under the blanket with you. Would you say Tom Brady is pressed? Yeah.
Pressed on Antonio Brown? Yes.

Speaker 3 And Antonio Brown is pressed by how much Tom Brady loves him.

Speaker 3 He's pressed.

Speaker 3 He's pressed like this is too much for me. It also is very funny.
I saw Kyle Brandt had a thing on the Good Morning Football show. He basically broke it down.

Speaker 3 And Antonio Brown, almost word for word, did his exact press conference from Oakland that he did for Tampa Bay. Yeah.
Like being like, yeah, I'm here because Bruce Arings is an offensive guru.

Speaker 3 And he said, I'm here because John Gruden's an offensive guru. And like all the same lines.
Dude, I'm telling you, I know he's a great receiver. It's not going to end well.
No, it's just not.

Speaker 3 I'm calling my shot on this. Antonio Brown is a legit psychologist.

Speaker 3 You're hot right now because essentially your shots are perfect that eventually someone's going to be old. Yeah.
Like it's not going to end well. He might retire.
But Tom Izzo is a bad head coach.

Speaker 3 I will be proven one of the. Right.

Speaker 3 Eventually he's not going to be good. Yeah.
I mean, with Antonio Brown, I think we can all agree that he's like, he's bad news. Yes.

Speaker 3 Big time bad news. Is he going to show up on a hot air balloon? Has a hot air balloon been spotted in Tampa? I don't know.
Yeah, he's here comes trouble. Yep.
Yeah, big time.

Speaker 3 All right. Should we do some fantasy fuckboys?

Speaker 3 I mean, to be fair, Antonio Brown hasn't committed sexual assault that we know of in the last six months. At least.
Yeah. At least.
Maybe even 12.

Speaker 3 We don't know. All right.
Let's do some fantasy fuckboys, and we'll get to a great, great interview with Robert Eiler, aka AJ Soprano, in a minute. All right, fantasy fuckboys.
Ready to go? Yeah.

Speaker 3 Let's do it. Let's go.
Let's do it. Go, go, go, go.

Speaker 3 What's up, boys? It's body microphone. Somebody.

Speaker 3 My stardom is Chick-fil-A sauce. Yeah, yeah.
Nothing better. I don't know if it's honey mustard.
I don't know if it's ranch. I don't know if it's whatever it is, but it's fucking fire.

Speaker 3 I want to douse that thing on my dick. Wait, you're going to be a bitch.

Speaker 3 You're going to suck your own dick after you put Chick-fil-A sauce.

Speaker 3 Chick-fil-A would not be happy with that. Loob, if you got Chick-fil-A sauce.
Hell yes.

Speaker 3 My sitim is ankles.

Speaker 3 Fuck them. Ankles.

Speaker 3 I like them. I like them.
Ankles. You think she's the one, and then you're like, fuck.
Ankles

Speaker 3 ankles. That means they won't turn their ankles.
Steph Curry needs a pair. That's right.
And my sleeper is Jerry Judy.

Speaker 3 He's poised for a breakout week this weekend, boys. Pick him up off the wave of wire.
All right. I like it.
I like it, Marty Mike.

Speaker 3 I'm a Shorty Ciano. I'm a little

Speaker 3 Marty Mikey. Marty Mikey Mikey.
Marty Mikey over there. All right.

Speaker 3 Jeff. Fuck you.
Shorty Ciano is my name. I'm starting this weekend.
Weed in New Jersey. That's right.

Speaker 3 We just legalized the since a media some hobo can kind bud some seaside sativa baby get the boys together some some Bruce Greenstein some bong jovi let's get it everybody over to the house we're smoking some pot hell yeah absent touch screens fuck touch screens you got John King on CNN breaking it down like he's everybody's boss give me give me baldy taking a looking at a fucking video on his phone that he took of his television shoving his broke-ass pinky in front of it, breaking down film that way.

Speaker 3 I'm old school. That's the old school way.
OS for life. Fuck a county.
Shout out Jeff Schwartz's spoon.

Speaker 3 I'm sleeping. My sleeper is Washington Football Team.
Little bitty baby run. One game.
There we go. One game.
There we go. All right, what's up, guys? It's Francisco Tempora.
What's up, Frankie Tippy?

Speaker 3 My stardom is Cooper Rush. Cooper Rush starting for the Dallas Cowboys.

Speaker 3 That sounds like a guy from West Texas who won three state titles and knocked up his girlfriend when they were 17 and went on to be a town legend.

Speaker 3 He's actually from Michigan, but he's built for being a cowboy. My sleeper is, or no, my sitem is Wolf Blitzer.
I don't know something about that fucking guy. Mr.
Blitzer. I fucking hate his face.

Speaker 3 What doesn't compute in my brain is his beard gets smaller every year, but you can see it more. His name's Wolf.
That's the fucking cool friend. Everything's going on.

Speaker 3 And my sleeper is the Blue Turf. Boise State BYU.
Friday night. unbelievable game.
The Blue Turf is back. Don't sleep on the Blue Turf.
BYU is going to smoke off. Yeah, they are.

Speaker 3 What up, it's Dino D'Agostino? You're too loud, Dino. I don't have my headset.
My stardom is Natty Daddy's.

Speaker 3 It's just like going to a gas station and buying Natty Daddy. My Siddham is Sports Illustrated.
I drink PUD Light.

Speaker 3 Anheuser-Busch. My Siddham is Sports Illustrated Pre-Workout.
I took a nap after drinking it. It was terrible.
Don't take it. I only stick to the brain formula.

Speaker 3 I drank it and I took a nap. Terrible.
What is this fucking story? Terrible guys? What is this? Fucking star. Terrible.
Fucking terrible. Terrible.
Anyway, my sleeper is the Jets. Terrible.

Speaker 3 After the Giants,

Speaker 3 after the Giants had a pretty good game, I think the Jets actually might beat the Pats. I'm a New York fan.
What are you living in Oregon? You fucking smoking. Don't I am doing cocaine.
It's legal.

Speaker 3 Legalized cocaine. Anyway.

Speaker 3 The Jets. Nice.
I'm a closet Jet man. Oh.
Let's...

Speaker 3 No, now you're out of of the closet. Let's do the Can't Lose Parlay and the Berserker real quick.
Ready? Oh, yeah.

Speaker 3 1-800-Gambler, if you have a gambling problem, responsible gambling

Speaker 3 is your fraud-ass hedgehog. I'm doing

Speaker 3 so, Billy. Tell me, why did your hedgehog not make a pick last week? He wasn't feeling it.
What do you mean? And by him, you mean... He went 50.
Did your hedgehog die? No, no, my hedgehog's alive.

Speaker 3 I think Billy's hedgehog is dead. And Billy's covering for it by saying proof of life.
Proof of life. I have proof of life.
Proof of life.

Speaker 3 He went 500 over the weekend, and he was like, you know what?

Speaker 3 He wasn't feeling it. I want to see.

Speaker 3 I want to see a newspaper next to your live hedgehog. Okay.
Yeah. I can make that.
All right. So my can't lose parlay.
I'm doing something a little different this week.

Speaker 3 I'm adjusting some lines and I'm doing one o'clock, four o'clock night game.

Speaker 3 Three games. Spread it out.
Chiefs minus nine and a half, so that's adjusted.

Speaker 3 They're going to kill him. They're going to kill him.

Speaker 3 This one's ugly.

Speaker 3 Cowboys plus 17 and a half.

Speaker 3 17 and a half.

Speaker 3 I actually like that a lot. Yeah.

Speaker 3 17 and a half.

Speaker 3 17 and a half. And then

Speaker 3 due to cover. If they lose by 15, they're going to lose by 30.
17 and a half. They're never going to bucks money line.
So plus 285. And it will probably be boosted in the Barstool Sportsbook app.

Speaker 3 Plus 285 there. Three games.
All I'll do is do three games. I love it.
Billy.

Speaker 3 The Hedgehog picks. We got

Speaker 3 Packers minus seven we got Giants plus 2.5 we got Bears

Speaker 3 plus 6.5 we have

Speaker 3 Ravens minus 2 and we have

Speaker 3 Bills plus 3 how'd you decide to pick these picks actually I got that wrong 49ers plus 7 Washington minus 7

Speaker 3 yeah I just haven't made the TikTok how did you decide the process yeah but how did you decide which game wait you haven't made the tick tock you're in the process of making the tick tock so you videotaped your hedgehog doing it.

Speaker 3 So I videotaped it. But you haven't edited it yet.
Yeah, I videotaped the pics. Can I see it on your phone? Can I see the pics? I actually have it.
Do you have the video? I have the video right here.

Speaker 3 Look.

Speaker 3 Okay, there's your hedgehog.

Speaker 3 Why isn't it moving? That's purple. It's one of the older hedges.
No, it looks like an old hedgehog. Oh, yeah, it is.
Packers. Oh, that looks old.
Washington. Why does it have all that paint on it?

Speaker 3 Bears plus 6.5. Oh, okay.
All right.

Speaker 3 Ravens, minus 2. You could just be faking this every time.
Buffalo plus 3. All right.
Let's get to our interview. You ready for it? Ready for it.
Great interview. Great interview.
Awesome interview.

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Speaker 8 Eligibility and member terms apply.

Speaker 3 And now, Robert Eiler.

Speaker 3 Okay, we now welcome on a very special guest.

Speaker 3 It is Robert Eiler. He is also known as AJ Soprano.
He has a podcast, Pajama Pants. Go listen to it right now.
wherever podcasts you can get it.

Speaker 3 With, is it, who's, whose else is on that podcast?

Speaker 3 So jamie lynn sigler is on it who played my sister on sopranos and then uh our friend casim okay nice so um where do you want to start because we obviously want to talk some soprano stuff but i want to talk about all everything that you got going on in your life do you want to do the sopranos first and get it out of the way It's your show,

Speaker 9 whatever you want to

Speaker 3 know. All right, let's do the Sopranos first.
So we did the Mount Rushmore of Worst TV characters a couple of years ago, and you were actually my number one pick.

Speaker 9 And I, you know, my brother is a lacrosse player up at Brockport, and he hit me up, and he was the one who told me about it. All my friends are talking about this.

Speaker 9 And when he told me, I was like, I'm just, I feel good that I was the worst. Yeah.
Because if you said I was like the fourth worst character,

Speaker 9 that's just pathetic, you know?

Speaker 3 Well, and it's not, it's not, it's actually a testament to your acting because I think, and you can tell me if I'm wrong, but like that, AJ Soprano, the character, was kind of written that way.

Speaker 3 Of like you were

Speaker 3 as a viewer, you're constantly frustrated in him because you know, you have Jamie Lynn Siegler, you know, Meadow being the overachiever,

Speaker 3 you know, Ivy League, all that stuff. And then you have AJ who can't ever do anything right, and it's, it's written that way.
So you did a great job.

Speaker 3 It's like, it's a weird thing to say worst, but you did it perfectly.

Speaker 9 Thanks. Yeah, you know, it's always like, I think it's even harder when you're, you know, 14, 15, and you're just starting to like, girls are starting to look at you.

Speaker 9 And then like, every time you get the script, you're like, God, I have to be a douche again. You know, it's like there was, there were those times you're like, I just want to do something.
cool.

Speaker 9 And like there are times where you almost think he's going to do something cool. And then he just miserably fails at whatever he's trying to do.
Yeah.

Speaker 3 Right. You're like, oh, AJ's a football player.
Oh, he passes out on the field. Yeah.

Speaker 3 For a second, you thought like, hey, maybe I'm going to join the army and I'm going to become like, who knows, like a green beret or something. And then you give up on that action.

Speaker 3 Oh, he's got a sweet car. Oh, he lit it on fire.

Speaker 3 Yeah.

Speaker 9 It's like, oh, he actually might like go and kill Uncle Junior. And then he's like laying there crying, getting tackled by like orderlies or whatever.

Speaker 3 Yeah, it's so broken. Yeah, it's interesting because I'm sure that at that age, you want...
Like, there's a certain part of you. Yeah, you're acting, you're playing a part.

Speaker 3 And yes, it was a shitty character. Like, the guy, you know, the character that you played was a shithead, but he was a compelling shithead.
You know, we wanted to watch him. We want to see.

Speaker 3 It would be much worse if it was just like a character that we didn't give a shit about, you know?

Speaker 3 But I've also read that there were some guys on the show. I think Vito, the guy that played Vito,

Speaker 3 he came to the writer, or I forget if it was a director, one of the producers or whatever, with the idea for the character arc to be like, I want to be the gay guy. And then that gives me like...

Speaker 3 all these different areas that my character can go. Or at least, you know, worked in conjunction with him.
Did you have any of that opportunity for yourself?

Speaker 9 I know you were just, you know, you were a younger kid at the time but did you have any uh openings where you contributed to the character arc of aj uh not like i would sit down with david chase and and be like oh here's what i think but i noticed like i would show up to set in like a pantera shirt with a marijuana leaf on it skateboarding and then in the next episode i'd be skateboarding with a pantera shirt with a marijuana leaf on it i'd be like oh okay you know there's definitely or like I was big into like heavy metal, death metal, like slipknot was my favorite thing in the world.

Speaker 9 So like all of a sudden we start, he started putting slipknot in and uh

Speaker 9 yeah but we never really like i was a you know 15 year old moron i was never gonna sit with david and be like you know i think uh maybe my character should because one thing that was so great about the show which i didn't realize till after is like

Speaker 9 the the writing was so good that you you never had to like i they were just they were unbelievable at their job every and when i look back at sopranos it's one of the most like things i'm grateful for is at such such a young age, getting to see people in all different fields who are like the best at what they do.

Speaker 9 Yeah. Like you're watching the best actors, the best directors, the best, even their publicists, like everything.
You're like, holy shit. Cause then you go and try and do other shit.

Speaker 9 And you're like, oh man, this is what like the normal level of like these people are good. And they seem terrible because for so long we were working with just, you know, HBO really

Speaker 9 did right by us and they they treated us right and just every it was like

Speaker 9 on

Speaker 9 Friday or on Thursday I'd be in the park like drinking 40 smoking blunts with my friends on Saturday I'd be on a first class like trip to LA to go to the Emmys on the red carpet everything and by Monday I'd be back in the park smoking weed with my friends it was just crazy like I look back now

Speaker 9 And I'm like, how was that? Like, it just seemed normal to me at the time. But now I look back and I'm like, that's insane.
Yeah.

Speaker 3 yeah that is that is insane and it's also i mean it's uh rare that you have a a character an actor grow up on a show and in real life simultaneously because so walk us through so you get the you get the role how did you get the role first of all did you was it a bunch of kids that showed up and you're like you know this is going to be tough to get but you how did it all work out

Speaker 9 So I was

Speaker 9 I was six years, so started at the beginning, I was six years old walking down the street and a guy approached my dad and was like, Hey, your son should be like, you know, he didn't know I was going to be so short, but he's like, He should be a model or an actor, or like get in the business somehow.

Speaker 9 And then my mom ended up calling the phone number, and that guy is still my manager now, 30 years later.

Speaker 3 Wow,

Speaker 3 that's that's like a leap of faith to have like a guy just be like, hey, that kid's good-looking. Did you ever look back and you're like, Mom, what the hell were you doing calling this guy?

Speaker 9 Uh, no, because I mean, we were like as broke as, you know, my grandfather was a super and we were living like five or six of us in a one bedroom in Manhattan.

Speaker 9 And the only reason we got had that apartment is because my grandpa was a super, so he got to live rent-free in the building.

Speaker 3 Wow.

Speaker 9 So it was like any opportunity was like, hell, like, of course, you know?

Speaker 3 Yeah. So you start acting.
And then what, what, what age did you get the Sopranos role?

Speaker 9 So I was. going on auditions for about six years and then I went on the audition for Sopranos and I remember at first they thought it was like a show about singing.
That's what everybody thought.

Speaker 9 And they're like, oh, you know, my son doesn't sing. And then they're like, no, don't worry.
It's a show about like Italian mobsters. And I showed up and I'm like fat and full of freckles.

Speaker 9 And like, I was just a very Irish little kid.

Speaker 9 And every kid in the audition was like the white t-shirt with the black leather jacket and trying to like with like gel in their hair and trying to play it up like, oh, over here.

Speaker 9 And then I just kind of walked in and was like, you know, like David Chase said,

Speaker 9 like, I just like every time I said fuck, he laughed because all the other kids were like really

Speaker 9 trying to hit the fuck and like trying to show like, oh, look, I'm this crazy little kid who just said fuck. And I was just like, hey, are we fucking done here?

Speaker 9 Like, you know, can I, are we, because I just, we went there with the idea of like, oh, you're not going to get this. So it was a lot easier to just kind of be like, oh, this is just another.

Speaker 9 And nobody, doing a TV show on HBO wasn't a big deal then. And the Sopranos meant nothing because nobody had ever heard of it.

Speaker 3 Right. You know? Right.
That's, that's great. Just being able to say fuck.
I mean, that is a skill in itself. Like, there's a, there's an art to swearing, and that was your ticket onto the Sopranos.

Speaker 3 That's awesome. I think it's because you, you played it cool when you were swearing.
Like, it didn't sound like, you know, as you put it, you weren't trying to, like, hit the fucks.

Speaker 3 And you would sometimes like, it sounded like you were a kid that was still learning how to swear and still thought that it was cool to like be able to cuss and get away with it.

Speaker 3 Or like, you know, when your dad got mad at you, like, you'd say stuff like, man, that's dicked up. And it's like, well, I've never thought about saying dicked up before.
That's fucking brilliant.

Speaker 3 What a, what a genius. Yeah.
Did you, did you like ad-lib any of that stuff? Or was it always, you know, like what the writer would say, like, hey, we want you to like

Speaker 3 piss off your dad by dropping an F-bomb at the dinner table?

Speaker 9 No, they, I mean, the writing was so good that it wasn't like they told us, hey, don't ever ad-lib, but you just, you're like, this is perfect.

Speaker 9 I'm not, I'm not, why am I going to say something different when this is.

Speaker 9 So good.

Speaker 9 But then there were, there are other scenes where they're like, you know, okay, in the first like 30 seconds of this, you guys are just sitting around talking or you guys are doing whatever or you know and they don't have a script for you where you're ad-libbing stuff but normally like you know i'm a 15 year old kid who's like smoking weed every night i'm not going to be like like trying to change david chase's lines you know i'm like he he knows what he's doing yeah yeah uh do you feel like there was maybe like a little bit of stolen valor because you weren't like a stereotypical italian kid who got to play the son of a mob boss in a tv show called the sopranos if there was i didn't feel it because everybody just thought i was italian and still like i have friends who i've been friends with for 20 years who know i'm not italian and then when something italian comes up they're like yeah he knows like you know and i'm like no dude i'm not italian like people always forget but it's it's also like i was kind of raised like the the Italian pride on the set of Sopranos was so clear where in my home it wasn't like you're Irish like you know do do Irish things where like on the set of Sopranos it was like I felt very much like I was I remember one time we had like a catering thing and there was some terrible pasta there and i was eating it and they and they were all like how do you eat that garbage like oh you're like like i think the word medigon which is like you're america like you're some american you know and i'm like oh this is great and they're like dude that's like you know mac and cheese like and then they would take me to these like really high-end italian places when i was 14 years old and it was uh yeah it was it was crazy so i i read that you actually have not watched the sopranos like pretty much at all is that true like you don't you've watched watched basically none of the episodes.

Speaker 9 So when we would do, um, when we would go to the premieres, they would show us the first episode or the first two episodes. So the only episodes I've seen are those.

Speaker 9 And when the first episode came out, obviously I watched it like with my family. It was a big deal.

Speaker 9 But yeah, we would all go to like Radio City Musical for the premieres and there would be, you know, thousands of people, but all of us like sitting in one section, watching it together, laughing.

Speaker 9 And those memories are great.

Speaker 3 But like, I decided I didn't like watching it it made me feel uncomfortable but then like after james died i was like i could never watch it like just sitting there and watching 80 hours of video of him would be brutal do you do you think there will ever be a point in time in your life where you're like you know what like i'm gonna sit down and watch this like maybe you know 20 years from now 30 years from now where you're like all right let's uh because i i totally understand what you're saying watching yourself listening to yourself is weird i i can't imagine doing it as a kid too like now watching yourself as a kid.

Speaker 3 But do you think there'll ever be a day where you're like, all right, let's let's start this from the first episode and go through the whole thing?

Speaker 9 I don't know. We talked about doing it with Jamie because when I talked to Jamie about starting a podcast, we got an offer for money to like sit and do a rewatch where we watched.

Speaker 9 all the episodes and talked about it. And we just both kind of got together and we're like, that's just not what we want to do.
You know, like sitting there.

Speaker 9 And especially if I ever do decide to watch it, I don't want to feel like it's a job. You know, I don't want to get to episode 10 and be like, I don't want to watch watch anymore.

Speaker 9 And they're like, oh, you only have 73 episodes left.

Speaker 9 Right.

Speaker 3 Right. We won't spoil any of it for you.
No, we won't. Yeah.
We're not going to spoil anything. You die at the end.
Yeah. Your whole family gets shot at the table.
Yeah.

Speaker 9 And that's what's crazy is like people always who think who talk about me not watching it, they think I don't know what happened.

Speaker 9 You know, there's a lot of people who think I have no idea what happened.

Speaker 9 And I'm like, no, we, we sat around every episode before we recorded the episode and you do a read-through where everyone sits with the script and you read your part.

Speaker 9 And those are like some of my best memories by far from Sopranos.

Speaker 9 Well, they would just have food around and everybody would be sitting around in like pajamas and everyone would read the script and the laughter in those rooms were crazy.

Speaker 3 So when it came time to rehearse the very last scene where you guys are in the restaurant and you guys are reading through that, you know, getting ready to shoot it and you're getting all the notes and all the feedback.

Speaker 3 Do you know that you're going to die at the end? Is that something that's told to you?

Speaker 3 Like, hey, we're going to film it and you're going to get shot and it's going to be a bloody mess, but we're just not going to use that last five seconds

Speaker 9 were you there yeah that's exactly exactly what that's it you know what's weird is people talk a lot about that last scene but for us we didn't shoot the last scene last so it's like when we shot that scene it was very like oh it's just another day at work and then two weeks later was everyone's actual last day so even though that was the last scene it didn't feel like the last scene and everyone i i watched it live i think i i think i started watching the show live around season three and three or four, but I remember vividly, I thought my cable went out.

Speaker 3 And that was pretty much everyone in America thought their cable went out. So thank you for that, even though you didn't write it.

Speaker 3 But I appreciate that and the scare that I got because that's like the scariest moment in the world to have your cable go out.

Speaker 3 Who was the funniest guy on set? We talk about like,

Speaker 3 you know, doing the table reads and getting ready. Who is the person who just made everyone laugh?

Speaker 9 For me, it was probably Johnny V, who played artie buco okay okay

Speaker 9 dude he he is he's hilarious like he would

Speaker 9 we would be like uh on a trip to california or something he would just go into an impression of somebody and just stay that guy you know like he would be walking around the hotel pretending to be somebody else he was johnny v is hilarious um

Speaker 9 who else is really funny i mean steve sharip is pretty great yes he's a good time he's a fun guy yeah yeah i mean art baby Baklova, right?

Speaker 3 Yeah. Artie Bucco, just a total tragic character.
You want to talk about other guys who, like, the way they were written, just the saddest character. Yeah.

Speaker 3 I felt bad for him the entire time. Yes.
Hot wife. Yeah.
Very hot wife.

Speaker 9 What about? And then I did.

Speaker 9 We actually had Dre De Mateo on a couple times on our podcast already. She's hilarious.
Like, she's such a,

Speaker 9 I don't know how to put it, but like, she's, she, she says she's abroad, you know? Like, she's not a girl where like you have to watch your words around her.

Speaker 9 Like, she'll push the top, like, she'll make you uncomfortable, you know, which is like, it's, it's just such a treat, you know.

Speaker 3 Yeah, that's Adriana, obviously, for people who uh might not know. Yeah, I was walking around uh, the West Village one time, and I heard her behind me, and I was like, that's Adriana.

Speaker 3 I turned around, and it was Adriana, sure enough. Like, you hear her coming before you see her sometimes, yeah.

Speaker 9 And then you see her, and you're like, holy shit, yeah. She was, she was, for me, she was by far.
When we started the show, I was like 13. She was the hottest chick I'd ever seen in real life.

Speaker 3 Yeah, for a lot of people who watch the show. And she was, she, she might be up there.
We should do like a

Speaker 3 rankings of characters because she might be up there for best. Do you say actress still or actor? Is everyone an actor? Thespian.
Thespian? I would say her performance is up there, top three.

Speaker 3 Yeah.

Speaker 3 She's

Speaker 3 unreal. When Christopher sat on the dog and killed it when he was high on junk, R.I.P.
Cosette, did you guys get some sworn on a set? Yeah. Were you guys like that, man?

Speaker 3 We're not going to be able to work with this dog anymore. Yeah.

Speaker 9 Well, you know what's crazy is there's people who like Lorraine Bracco, who people think like, oh, you worked with Lorraine Bracco for 10 years. And it's like, but I never had one scene with her.

Speaker 9 You know, so when things like that scene are going on, you don't even know,

Speaker 9 you know, you hear about it in the read-through and then you hear nothing else. Like even scenes that I've done.

Speaker 9 I've gone, I've seen like little clips of it. Like I saw me like sweeping up glass in the backyard one time and I was like, I never did that.
You know, like, there's, there's no way.

Speaker 9 I'm like, what the fuck is that? Like, why was I sweeping up glass in the backyard? It's just, it's, it's, people talk about like these scenes and they're so memorable to them.

Speaker 9 But for me, it was like something I did with my friend 22 years ago.

Speaker 3 Yeah.

Speaker 9 Like a scene that you just, it was like going out to, it'd be like, remember having lunch with your friend 22 years ago and you said this and he said this? And you're like, no, of course not.

Speaker 3 That actually's got to be maddening because everyone does have that one friend who will remember certain like conversations or they'll be like, hey, remember when you said this

Speaker 3 in 2004? And you're like, no, I don't. And thank you for telling me I'm stupid for saying that.

Speaker 3 But you have that just constantly with every moment of your life being on camera there for like those 10 years. That's got to be a little crazy.
Yeah.

Speaker 3 I can understand why you're not going to watch back the whole show.

Speaker 9 And you forget about some of them and people remind me.

Speaker 9 remind you and you're like oh that hurts you know like people are like oh you remember when you when you cried and you fainted and you're like oh yeah that was you know, you forget all about that.

Speaker 9 Like, there was a bear and you started crying and yelling for your mom. I'm like, oh, yeah, okay.

Speaker 3 So when you first started acting on this parent, how old were you when you first started filming?

Speaker 9 So I was 12 years old when the show recorded. And then when it first aired, I was probably like 13, maybe 14.

Speaker 3 So I wouldn't call that being a child actor. You were definitely like younger, but you were like going through like a big change in your life at the time, like 12, 13 years old.

Speaker 3 That's like, you know, middle school. That's when shit starts to happen in real life where you kind of take control of your own life as a kid.
Did that fuck with you at all? Like

Speaker 3 having that, like trying to have that delineation between, okay, I'm at work playing a character and then this is me, you know, offset.

Speaker 3 Like, did the, did the character of AJ start to blend in with your personality or how did you keep that separate, if not?

Speaker 9 For me, never, because what was so great about, like, I think about kids who did Nickelodeon shows and I'm like, oh, no, that must be so crazy because you go to school and it's just insane.

Speaker 9 Where for me, I'd go to school, there was not one kid in my, like I went to public school in New York City my whole life. There's a thousand kids in your school.

Speaker 9 There was not one kid in my school who watched Sopranos ever. That's crazy.

Speaker 9 You know, and if you're, if you're 14 years old and you're going to a party with a bunch of 14 year olds, nobody knows the sopranos.

Speaker 9 Nobody like people have kind of heard of it or this, but there were no 14 year olds then like watching sopranos every Sunday night. Like, you know.

Speaker 3 Yeah. Okay.
We got more AJ Soprano coming up, Robert Eiler. Before we do that, though.

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Speaker 3 Okay, back to Robert Eiler. All right, so let's talk a little after you finish, after the Sopranos ends.
You took an interesting route, and I respect the hell out of this.

Speaker 3 You basically just said, I'm going to go live my life for a while

Speaker 3 and enjoy myself. So, you went and became a professional poker player in Vegas.
Is that right?

Speaker 9 Yes. So, when I was 22, we finished Sopranos.
And I remember everybody talking about, like, oh, what are we going to do next? And am I going to do a play and a movie?

Speaker 9 And I told my manager, I'm like, Don't call me for six months. Like, pretend like I don't exist.
I don't, even if it's important, I'm like, I just don't want to hear it. And

Speaker 9 that six months turned into like, you know, 12 years or however long, because I just kept pushing it off and pushing it off.

Speaker 9 And then I was partying so hard that I went to Vegas alone for two weeks to play in the World Series of poker. And I got like 275th in the main event and it paid 40 something thousand.

Speaker 9 And I just took that money and I was like, I'm going to put this in account and get an apartment here in Vegas for a year. And when that's gone, I'll go back to New York.

Speaker 9 So I went to Vegas for two weeks and I came home a year and a half later.

Speaker 3 That's okay. That's crazy.
Yeah, that's incredible stuff. So how, were you like good? I mean,

Speaker 3 that's a dream that a lot of people, I think, can relate to. We're like, hey, let's just go to Vegas and try to make it work.
A year and a half is a long time.

Speaker 3 Like, how would you rank yourself as a poker player?

Speaker 9 Well,

Speaker 9 13 years ago, poker was different than it is now. You know, they figured it out with solvers and computers and all this stuff.
And so, like, 13 years ago.

Speaker 9 All you had to do was not have a day job and you were a good poker player because half of the people at the table would have a day job or kids or they'd be there like one day a week playing poker like oh it's my night out i'm coming to play poker where now

Speaker 9 you know the level of poker what happened was they had a computer figure out like bto game theory optimal which is like the best way to play poker so now people study that and they play that way and it just it makes it a lot harder it makes it also a lot less fun you know like people are just sitting there not talking figuring out like mathematical equations in their head where when i was when i moved to vegas everybody was drinking and laughing.

Speaker 9 And, and, and, the poker table was like a party, you know, where now it's like a classroom.

Speaker 3 Yeah.

Speaker 3 So, how, if you're playing like by the book or by the computer and you're going up against somebody that is just dumb as shit, like, you know that they're not doing any sort of math in their head, right?

Speaker 3 Like, they're totally wildly unpredictable. How do you incorporate your computer model into evaluating a guy that's like maybe a legit psychopath or just stupid as hell?

Speaker 9 So, I probably studied GTO for like, you know,

Speaker 9 a year. And I, and I kind of, it was when I was like falling out of love with poker.
But before that, like, I would say from 19 to, you know, 28, I was just obsessed with poker.

Speaker 9 And you, you go and you play against people who they're, they don't like, you know, I had a poker tracker, which is like, I know how much money I make an hour. I know how much I made this year.

Speaker 9 Most people go.

Speaker 9 and they just think when they lose money they're like oh i got a bad beat you know or whatever where when i started studying gto and doing all that stuff, I kind of lost the, it wasn't fun anymore, you know, like I was just like, oh, I don't want to be a guy sitting here doing math all day.

Speaker 9 And it's like, when, when I used to bluff people, it would be like, I'm picking my spot, you know, like, I'm going to do this.

Speaker 9 Where now in GTO, you take like, you know, something like a clock and you're like, okay, if, if the minute hand is between zero and 15 minutes and I'm supposed to bluff, you know, 25% of the time.

Speaker 9 That's the time I'll bluff.

Speaker 9 So when you have your hand and you go, this is the hand where I'm supposed to bluff 25% of the time, you look at a clock and you see what time it is, and you're like, that determines if you're going to fold or play.

Speaker 3 That's crazy. Yeah, that does

Speaker 3 sound like all the funny thing. Yeah, take the phone out of it.
So you also played in a lot of the like New York games. I would assume I watched that movie, Molly's Game, a couple months ago.

Speaker 3 Did you play in some of those games?

Speaker 9 So I didn't see Molly's game, but I know

Speaker 9 I don't know what, you know, it's dangerous because I didn't see the movie. I don't know what I'm allowed to talk about, but there were

Speaker 9 people who, when I started poker, were having like these smaller games.

Speaker 9 By smaller, it's like, you know, a thousand to 2,000 buy-in and it was all businessmen and everybody was having fun. And then it became.

Speaker 9 The games got a lot bigger in New York and they became like $100,000 buy-in. And I never played those.

Speaker 9 Like I'm, I'm never, I never showed up to play poker with more than 10 grand because if I, if I was going to lose $100,000 in a night, I wouldn't sleep for weeks.

Speaker 3 Yeah.

Speaker 3 I mean, that makes sense.

Speaker 3 I just,

Speaker 3 I saw on your Wikipedia, it says that you were at one of the places that got raided, which that's got to be a thrill to not be arrested, too. You weren't arrested, but

Speaker 3 there was a raid at a poker lounge in New York. That's like the coolest thing ever.
Were they wearing the windbreakers, like the FBI, the blue and yellow jackets?

Speaker 9 Yes.

Speaker 9 So I was drunk and I showed up to play poker and there was a cop in front of the poker place and he's like uh he saw me going in and he looked at me he's like hey get out of here and i was like oh okay like like just bounce and i went to meet my friends at the bar and we drank for like two hours and i and i was like oh you know they'll be done by now and i went back to the poker place and when the elevator opened it was just all the police officers were in there and then one guy was like i told you to get the out of here you know

Speaker 9 oh yeah like i was i was just i was an idiot you know i was

Speaker 9 21 years old, like thinking I'm, you know, invincible or what it was just, it was a dumb thing, but I was doing a lot of dumb shit back then, you know.

Speaker 3 Yeah, when you're playing in these underground games, like that to me just feels like it'd be cool. Like you'd feel like you were getting away with something the whole time.

Speaker 3 Is there any like anything that you miss now that, you know, poker is, it's more out in the daylight than it's ever been, but like, was there an element of feeling like it's pretty fucking cool to be in like some dimly lit basement knowing that you were breaking the law just by playing a card game?

Speaker 9 Yeah, you know, part of it is like you feel sleazy.

Speaker 9 And then part of it is also cool where like, you know, there were times where I'd be walking with my friends somewhere and I'd be like, oh, hold on, let's walk in here real quick.

Speaker 9 And we'd walk into this like shady spot and I would grab $1,000 from like some shady dude. And then my friend would be like, what the fuck was that? And I'd be like, oh, don't worry about it.

Speaker 9 You know, like, it's just, so like, it was, there is a feeling of like.

Speaker 9 It was cool to know that there was this underground world going on in New York City. And like, I'd be on a block eating lunch somewhere.

Speaker 9 And I'd be like, oh, shit, I know that there's like a high-stakes poker game going on right there. And you see, like, you know, people people just walking by, clueless, and shit.

Speaker 9 But most of the times,

Speaker 9 you know, there's such a variation of those games where like you go to some place and you're like, wow, this is really nice and everything is really classy. And this.

Speaker 9 And then you go to some places and you're like, well, there's like a cockroach crawling up my leg right now. And I just want to get the fuck out of here because it's disgusting.

Speaker 9 But you know, you're like, you know, it's Sunday night at 2 a.m. This is the only game that's going.
So you're just, you know, you stay and you play.

Speaker 3 I would imagine, too, that did that ever happen to you with the Sopranos where you're like the acting melds into real life and you're kind of walking around being like, I'm a protected guy.

Speaker 3 Cause like my dad's Tony Soprano.

Speaker 9 Well, there, there were a guy, you know, the guy who played Pauly Walnuts, Tony Sorico. Yeah.
The greatest.

Speaker 9 By the way, I can't believe when you said, who's the funniest guy, he's the funniest guy by far. I don't know how that slipped my mind, but.

Speaker 9 He was just hilarious being himself because he was, you know, Pauly Walnuts. Like he, he came to my confirmation.
when I guess I don't know how old you are, 14 or 15.

Speaker 9 And he came over to me and he gave me an envelope full of cash. And he was like, listen, if you ever have a problem, you call Uncle Tony.

Speaker 9 So it wasn't just the acting. Like there were times where I really was like, okay.
And he would bring people around like to dinners and stuff. And he'd be like, yeah, this is Jimmy the hat.

Speaker 9 Like, you know, and there would be these guys who are like all these, like,

Speaker 9 some of them are just big dudes. Like, you would, like, he rolled around with this dude who was like,

Speaker 9 he gave me like a pin that he won the golden gloves and he was like six foot six, like some crazy. And he's like, yeah, this is, you know, this is Big Mike, and this is this guy.

Speaker 9 And that, and you got the vibe where you're like, I feel protected, not from the acting, I feel protected from these guys, you know?

Speaker 3 Yeah, people that you're around. That's awesome.
Is there any, like, is there any pull for you to get back into acting or any point? Are you like, you know what? That's in the rearview mirror.

Speaker 3 I was on maybe the best show of all time. There's really no need to get back into that.

Speaker 9 You know what? It's like, especially with doing

Speaker 9 the podcast, it's like

Speaker 9 going somewhere where you get to decide what to do. And you don't like people like, okay, show up at this time.
You're going to say this. You're going to wear this.
You're going to eat this.

Speaker 9 You're going to act like this. It's like, it just gets to the point where you're like, fuck, I don't really want to do that.

Speaker 9 You know, and especially with a TV show, because it's like, it starts in one area. And then three years later, you're somewhere totally different where you're like, I didn't sign up for this shit.

Speaker 9 You know, you have no idea where it's going to go.

Speaker 9 Where maybe if it was a movie and I thought it would be cool to do, like, I would think about it, but I don't desire to be in, you know, to do like some long-term TV show anymore, you know?

Speaker 3 Yeah,

Speaker 3 I did see, though, in another relatable moment that you have been in a couple Law and Order episodes, and that was strictly to get out of jury duty. Is that true?

Speaker 9 Oh, well, you did your research, huh?

Speaker 3 Where did you see that?

Speaker 3 I have a long history with jury duty.

Speaker 3 I've been trying to get in and out of jury duty for like two years. So when I saw that, I was like, like, fuck yes, this is awesome.
Like the fact that you could just, so is that how it actually went?

Speaker 3 You got jury duty and you're like, hey, law and order, I'm ready for my episode. So I don't have to do jury duty.

Speaker 9 That's exactly what happened.

Speaker 9 I got the phone call and they were like, hey, you have to come down to like whatever it is, Center Street.

Speaker 9 And I had been on probation for three years and going down just to that area and walking in those buildings would like turn my stomach because I just, I hated it so much.

Speaker 9 And they were like, yeah, come down to Center Street and do jury duty. So I called up my manager and I'm like, Can you get me a job to get out of jury duty next week? So he called me back.

Speaker 9 He's like, Yeah, I have a job for you on Law and Order. If you do the episode of Law and Order, they'll send a letter in that you're working and you can't make jury duty.

Speaker 9 And I didn't even ask what I was doing in the show. I was like, Okay.

Speaker 3 What? So, what did you do in the show?

Speaker 4 Uh, I hit a spoiler alert.

Speaker 9 I think I like killed my sister's parents or some shit.

Speaker 3 Wait, so you were the culprit. You were the guy.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Speaker 3 You just showed it up,

Speaker 3 just trying to get out of work, and you just showed up, and you're like, Okay, I'm gonna, I guess I'm gonna be the star of the show and be like a multiple murderer. Like, that's okay, whatever.

Speaker 3 Tell me where to stand, what knife to hold. I'm good.

Speaker 9 And I, I also have a horrible fear of like paperwork. And I, and I just imagined that jury duty would have a bunch of paperwork.

Speaker 9 Like when I won the $40,000 at the World Series of Poker, you get knocked out and then they send you into this room.

Speaker 9 And the person handed me me like a four page thing to fill out and there was part of me that was like i should just leave like you know i i i like when it went all those like empty spaces and having to fill in all your information i never know any of the answers like i'm just i'm clueless i i paperwork is like my number the thing i hate the most oh it it definitely sucks because i've had to do it and i uh yeah jury duty is not fun i got out of it because i was just like hey i have an interview i have to do who who are we interviewing shit i it might have been uh from that 70s show Tofa Grace.

Speaker 3 Yeah, Tofer Grace. I was like, Hey,

Speaker 3 I have Tofer Grace. We're interviewing him tomorrow.
And the person was like, Ooh, Toford Grace? I was like, Yeah. And they're like, Okay, you can go.

Speaker 3 So I have a not as cool as Lawn calling up and being like, Put me in Law and Order. You're like, I got to go murder Tofa Grace.

Speaker 3 It would have been. I also might have embellished a little bit because I also threatened them.
And I was like, Hey, listen, I have a radio show and a podcast.

Speaker 3 So, whatever case I get put on, I will be talking about publicly a lot. And they're like, well, that doesn't work.

Speaker 9 Your excuse falls somewhere on the cool level in between mine and my grandpa's, which was my grandpa would be like, just tell him you're racist.

Speaker 3 He's like, that's what I do.

Speaker 9 And I'm like, okay, Pop, that's going to work out great for me.

Speaker 3 Yeah.

Speaker 9 Just go in there and just tell him he's racist.

Speaker 3 I could actually see Junior Soprano doing that on an episode of The Sopranos. Just like going and pretending, you know, I'm a racist.
He's like, I'm very racist, you know.

Speaker 3 I love eating pussy, but I'm racist.

Speaker 3 By the way, Junior shoots Tony in one of the episodes when he does actually get dementia. We should bring that up.
That is true. Spoiler alert if you haven't seen it.
We like to.

Speaker 3 So Hank started watching the series, what was that, like four years ago? And our producer would watch it, and he was doing like two episodes a week.

Speaker 3 And so then, just because we're dickheads, we decided to spoil every single season of The Sopranos for him and tell him. It's been out for 20 years.

Speaker 9 I know Glenny Balls is a big fan, right?

Speaker 3 Yeah, he went to the house. He went to the house

Speaker 3 for like Sopranos Con or whatever it was a couple weeks ago how much time did you actually spend in that house or was that were you taping it somewhere else so we filmed uh the first the pilot the first episode at that house and then we filmed at that house anytime that there were scenes in the pool any outdoor scenes shit like that would be there and then everything else uh was in a studio in long island city in queens at silver cup yeah um i did hear that there were things about the show that the FBI would kind of pick up on and they thought that there was somebody that was on the inside that was writing for the show that also worked in the FBI or like feeding things back and forth.

Speaker 3 Because you remember when they had the bug down in the basement of that house that was, it got like moved next to the furnace or something like that.

Speaker 3 That's something that actually happened where the FBI tried to bug somebody's house. And I think they put in a lamp.
The lamp got moved next to either an air conditioning unit or a furnace.

Speaker 3 So I guess what I'm asking you is, are you a rat?

Speaker 3 Were you? Did anyone ever approach you from the FBI about like, hey, if you get any good ideas, let let us know so that we can then use those in the field?

Speaker 9 I know they

Speaker 9 would use stuff in the script sometimes that people who were wise guys would like come up and say to people, like the actors on our show, like there was a scene where somebody comes over and says, I think to Tony, like wise guys don't wear shorts.

Speaker 3 Like you're not supposed to wear shorts.

Speaker 9 And that was something that really happened in real life was a wise guy went to James Genolfini like at a bar or something. And he came over to him.

Speaker 9 He just said in his ear, he's like, Listen, no wise guy would ever wear shorts.

Speaker 9 They just put it in the show.

Speaker 3 That's what makes it authentic. That's what makes it great.
Was it, so we talked about James and how watching the show would be painful.

Speaker 3 So I know you had a very close relationship with him, but was there ever a moment when you were taping the show that you had like a step back? Like, I can't believe I'm sharing,

Speaker 3 you know, the screen with with this guy who is such an incredible, incredible actor. Like, could you feel it in the moment?

Speaker 9 Never. And the crazy thing is, is it wasn't until I would watch other shows and I'd be like, wow, it must be dope to be those guys.
Then I was like, oh, wait, like, I kind of am those guys.

Speaker 9 Like, I'm, I'm sitting there working with James. And everybody loves to talk about James.
He is one of the greatest actors of all time. But another thing is, like, Edie Falco

Speaker 9 is so unbelievable.

Speaker 9 Like, she is like, sometimes I would definitely sit there and you see, and especially because, you know, Tony was very different from James, but also Edie was very different from Carmella.

Speaker 9 And you would sit there and be like, holy shit, because you would see her in the hair and makeup trailer, like show up with her dog and we'd hug and talk and how are you and very sweet.

Speaker 9 And then she would go into hair and makeup and come out with like the long nails and the crazy hair and the makeup done and like Versace.

Speaker 9 clothes and it was just like the transformation was was crazy so there there definitely were times where i was sitting there with edie and i was like wow she is she is on such another level yeah she i mean yeah that she's i don't even know if you could do like a top five character list because she also would be easily top five easily in terms of just acting and these were all these were all actors who not only were trained and like unbelievable actors but they had been trying to make a break in acting for so long.

Speaker 9 And then you have me who's like 12 years old, never took an acting class.

Speaker 9 And I'm just sitting on set like, yeah, I belong here here too, you know, which is just so not true, you know, but it was, it was, it was crazy, man.

Speaker 9 And the same thing, it's like, it really, that's the thing I think about all the time of like how Edie Falco, James Gandalfini, people like that were just out there going on auditions.

Speaker 9 And then a year later, they're, you know, Tony and Carmella Soprano. And you're like, how did, how did, how did people let them walk out of a room?

Speaker 3 Right. Yeah.
Right. And you, you bring that up, though, about like you just being a kid.

Speaker 3 I think that's actually like thinking about it, why your character was so good and hatable because you were just you and you were a kid at the time and i think that like you said in in terms of your first time when uh when everyone was trying out for it not trying to act too much was why your character was so good uh because you were really just a kid you know what i mean like that's thinking about it like it kind of all makes sense It just, it never felt like a big deal, you know?

Speaker 9 Like, even the first time we went out to to the Emmys, they rented a bus and they painted like New Jersey Transit on the side.

Speaker 9 And we all got in the bus and went together like a family, you know, and you would see when we would go to the Emmys, it would be like, oh, there's Matt LeBlanc and over there's Jennifer Anison and these people, where when it was, when we were there, it was like, oh, there's the Sopranos.

Speaker 9 Right. Because we never, like, we never left each other's side.

Speaker 9 We would go and pull like eight tables into a corner somewhere and just sit there for, you know, eight hours and laugh and drink and hang hang out. And we just like, it was crazy.

Speaker 9 It really doing other things after that, I realized how, but that's what made me realize how special it was because you're like, wow, we were straight up like a family, you know? Yeah. Yeah.

Speaker 3 Who would you say had the best post-Sopranos acting performance?

Speaker 3 Would it be Edie on Nurse Jackie or would it be Michael Imperleone on those tequila commercials where he'd pour him upside down and be like, Mike Tequila pours itself, bitch.

Speaker 3 What the fuck can yours do?

Speaker 9 You're missing Tony Sorico was in blockbuster commercials.

Speaker 3 I think those were where he would like threaten people if they didn't rewind the tape and deliver it back on time.

Speaker 3 I forgot about that. All right.
Yeah, he's the winner. Obviously, that was totally the winner.
Easily the winner there.

Speaker 9 Well, I got a question for you guys.

Speaker 9 So I was thinking: if you guys did like bar stool therapy and did like real legit sessions with people, who do you think would make the best season if they were honest? I think between

Speaker 9 Stu Feiner, Rico Bosco, and Frank the Tank.

Speaker 3 I would say Stu seems like the correct answer. Just like the shit that he's seen.
I don't know. Stu is,

Speaker 3 I would actually probably go with Rico. Rico's got something real fucked up in his head.
Like, Stu is fucked up, but Stu also, I'll always give Stu credit.

Speaker 3 He's like a true family man, heart of gold type of guy.

Speaker 3 So, and Frank, we just be like, I think everything would just lead back to the Mets, where it'd be like, the source of all my misery and happiness is the New York Mets.

Speaker 3 So Rico would be the one I'd want to sit down and really try to be like, so what is going on? Brandon Walker wouldn't be bad either. I'd like to know what's going on under the surface.

Speaker 3 But yeah, with Frank, I think it's not a mystery with Frank. What you see is 100% what you get.

Speaker 3 Yeah, if you were to sit down on a psychiatrist's couch, they'd just be like, yeah, well, I think the problem at the end of the day is your bullpen. Your bullpen just stinks.
Right.

Speaker 3 And I can't write you a prescription for that. I'm sorry.
And Rico is like, you could sit there and be like, Rico, do you you know you're crazy? And he'd be like, yeah, yeah, yeah. No, no, no, no.

Speaker 3 You just do that for like three hours. It would just have to be a process.

Speaker 9 And then you proceed. Like diagnosing his paranoia would just be so amazing.
But I also, the reason why I think Frank the Tank is because I could see like.

Speaker 9 the first two episodes you're kind of like i don't know if i'm in and then somewhere in like episode three he just breaks and like even his voice changes like he just starts crying and like the all the truth comes out about like what's really going on yeah yes that's true.

Speaker 3 That's a good I like that hypothetical. Uh, the final question is brought to you by Cross Country Mortgage America's crazy good mortgage company.

Speaker 3 Go to ccmlens.com/slash take to learn more about your future home, buying experience, or refinancing needs equal housing opportunity. So, you also, um,

Speaker 3 you little shout out to play barstool app. You were telling me that you went, what, nine and one, like, two weeks ago? I love that I, I just, it's just crazy like how the world kind of works out

Speaker 3 that AJ Soprano is playing the play Barstool app, and like that's that's a thing, and you're actually doing really well on it.

Speaker 9 Well, what I used to do is like I would write down my picks in the beginning of the week, then I listen to all like the podcast and the stats and all these things, and then I look at my bets at the end of the week and see how they're different from the beginning of the week.

Speaker 9 And then I realized, like, my friend told me about the barstool play app, and I started using, I'm like, I could just use this and place all my bets on here, and I could track them.

Speaker 9 And then maybe one day, if something insane happened, win 25 grand.

Speaker 3 Yeah.

Speaker 3 It's a great way to do it. Yeah.

Speaker 9 The other day, I had the, if the bills score

Speaker 9 one field goal or a touchdown instead of a field goal, they scored like six or seven field goals that game.

Speaker 9 If I, I think six field goals, if they scored a touchdown instead of a field goal or one extra field goal, I would have been perfect on the barstool app.

Speaker 3 Wow. That's that's impressive.
I don't think I've ever come to that. But it's all, it's total, it's total luck.

Speaker 3 It's obviously total luck.

Speaker 3 But it's also real. So I want to make a bet based on what you think is going to happen tonight.
The Bucs and the Giants. So we're going to air this.
Probably Friday. We're going to air this Friday.

Speaker 3 So you're going to either seem like a genius or a complete idiot. I like it.
Tampa Bay minus 12.5. Monday Night Football.
Which way are you looking?

Speaker 9 So what I did was I put the

Speaker 9 Bucs in my 10-point teasers. So I got the Bucs minus two and a half.

Speaker 3 Ooh. Okay.
I like that. That's smart.

Speaker 3 I think I have the Bucks. I had the Bucs and the Eagles in a teaser, and each one was down.
I think it was like a seven-point teaser. So I'm still, I'm alive there.

Speaker 3 What about the over-under?

Speaker 9 I'm the worst. Whatever I say, go the opposite.
I'm horrible with over-unders. What is it, though? What's the total?

Speaker 3 46.5. Yeah.

Speaker 9 God, Tampa Bay's defense is so good.

Speaker 9 Giants are so unpredictable. I just, I guess I would take the over.

Speaker 3 I don't know. Oh, I like that.

Speaker 3 I like that. You're on fancy.
I love the underdog. You're going to still end up going on the over.
No, no, no. I like the under.
I actually do. So that's perfect.
That's perfect.

Speaker 9 I'm the worst at totals. It's crazy.
And that, and I have like a few teams where if I bet on them, what you should bet the opposite.

Speaker 9 Like, if I bet on the Falcons, you should do whatever the opposite I did. And the Chargers do whatever the opposite that I did.
Because I've never won a Charger bet in my entire life.

Speaker 3 Well, the Chargers never won a Charger bet in their entire life, too, because they just lose.

Speaker 9 We had that stat today: 38, 38 one score losses in the last five years that's unfathomable i don't even understand how that's possible yeah well you know what's crazy so last night i every sunday we go over to jamie's house and we like smoke a eight pound short rib and like watch football and you know you know what jamie's last name is now right yeah dykstra yeah that's right yes so uh yes

Speaker 3 we got him in here yeah

Speaker 9 we go over to jamie's house and we watch football and everything and i bet on on the eagles against the cowboys i'm so used to betting against the eagles that during the game i was rooting for the cowboys and i would catch them like the cowboys would drop a pass and i was like fuck and i was like oh wait i'm so used to rooting for like against the eagles you know like yes cowboys whatever that i i i was making i was like cheering for the wrong team during the game yeah that will happen that happens die hard twist yeah twist yourself up um well rob this has been awesome man we really appreciate this hopefully you're in new york sometime soon.

Speaker 3 You can come and hang out in person. We need to get you on Barcelona Sports Advisor to just walk in and be like, I'm the boss now and just intimidates Du Feiner.
That would be fantastic.

Speaker 9 I would love that. Yeah.

Speaker 9 I could be like part of the Mortal Lock if for some reason someone ever picked the Jets or the Giants as the Mortal Locke, right?

Speaker 3 The Jersey student teams. Yes, yes.
Or get you to do a burger review with Glenn Balls. Oh, I think that would probably make his entire life.
You have to do that. You would absolutely love that.

Speaker 9 Also, way better at betting on sports. I feel like I'm one of the best in the world at predicting what Dave is going to rate a pizza when he's

Speaker 3 scoring.

Speaker 9 Like, I'm nasty. Like, it's just, it's crazy.
Like, I pick, there's so many times where I'm like, oh, he's, you know, it's a 6-8. It's a 7.

Speaker 9 I know. I'm like, he's dancing between 7-9 and 8-1.
And then he's like, you know, if anybody, anybody who knows who watches this, I'm dancing between the 7-8 and the 8-1,

Speaker 9 I would put money up if we wanted to do that one day, too.

Speaker 3 Down. Against anybody who could predict.
That would be a very funny betting market. Have like you, Tommy, and Frankie watching behind the scenes.
And like your photos are

Speaker 3 going to do. You pause it right before he gives a score.
You guys each have to write down your scores independently. Yeah.
I like that.

Speaker 3 Yeah. All right.
Well, Rob, thanks so much. Everyone, go listen, Pajama Pants, his podcast.

Speaker 3 We appreciate it. Hopefully we see you soon, man.
Yeah, man.

Speaker 9 Thank you so much for having me. I'd love to have you guys on one day if

Speaker 3 you're free. Absolutely.
Absolutely. Thanks, man.

Speaker 9 Thanks a lot, man. See you soon.

Speaker 10 That interview with Robert Eiler was brought to you by our friends at the Pro Football Football Show is presented by the Chevy Silverado. Built for the hustle, ready for the game.

Speaker 10 Chevy Silverado is America's most dependable full-size truck. Whether you're grinding through the week or gearing up for kickoff, the Silverado is one ride that's always game ready.

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Speaker 3 Okay, let's wrap up with Fire Fest. It's been a week.

Speaker 3 Enjoy yourself. Have a Friday.
Relax. It's been a week.

Speaker 3 Fire Fest of the Week, though. Hank, you want to start? Bill, you can start.
Let's go, Billy. Billy, you start.
I'll start. Billy got Vanny Woodhead towed, and it's still in my name.
No way.

Speaker 3 How'd you find out? That would be my Fire Fest of the Week.

Speaker 3 Don't try to hide that.

Speaker 3 Undoubtedly, I will be towing so much money on this stupid fucking van. Because, oh, wait, hold on.
Here's the best part.

Speaker 3 Oh, here's the best part. Billy,

Speaker 3 we didn't have the title. So Billy was tasked with getting a new title sent to me.
Did that. Congrats, Billy.
Good job. Gave Billy the title.
Asked Billy today, what happened to the title?

Speaker 3 I thought you were just going to get rid of it or sell it or whatever. His dog ate the title.
We're getting another title. That is the excuse he uses.
No. My dog ate the title.

Speaker 3 He literally used my dog ate the homework as an excuse for me. There's a tweet of the

Speaker 3 conversation that happened. Wait.
My dog ate the title is a word. Words came out of his mouth.
No, it just ripped up the title.

Speaker 3 Anyway.

Speaker 3 Look,

Speaker 3 what was the title of a car doing at dog level? Right.

Speaker 3 I'm trying to figure out the series of events that

Speaker 3 are very large. And this jumps up of a car on the floor of your barn.

Speaker 3 Have a big idea. You're going to have to put it in your backpack.

Speaker 3 And then he just gave it, and then he walked home and he's like here Whitey

Speaker 3 have this

Speaker 3 Billy's dog's name is Whitey for Whitey Ford. Uh-huh.

Speaker 3 Who was Billy's favorite player? I have

Speaker 3 a picture of Whitey Ford. Because he played in like 1922.
I know, but I have an autographed photo of it. He just likes the name.

Speaker 3 My favorite player is Satchel Page. My uncle's also, so it's like, anyway.
All right, okay. Sorry.
But yeah, Whitey, so that's my Fire Fest. Yeah, so...

Speaker 3 Where did it get towed from? Who knows? Okay, no, it didn't actually get towed. He also lives in a barn.
I was like, just put it in the barn, dude. Okay, we're figuring it out.
Very complicated.

Speaker 3 Anyway,

Speaker 3 we're figuring it out.

Speaker 3 It's my firefest? Yeah, go ahead. My firefest of the week was,

Speaker 3 I think PFT got the FBI watching me. Okay, that was going to be, I was going to suggest that for you.

Speaker 3 No, I legit walked out of my house this morning and I saw a tinted Ford Taurus just parked outside and just like in a very sketchy spot. And then when I looked at it, it started driving away quickly.

Speaker 3 So I think the FBI is out there. Did it have that spiral antenna on the back that they spotted in that Pen Affleck movie, The Town? Yeah,

Speaker 3 it's like FBI. Yeah, it had weird.

Speaker 3 Oh, oh, the four-inch CB antenna.

Speaker 3 They've been using that for fucking years. Might want to hide that.
On the marked, the unmarked cars that they have like the weird thing on the rear rear mirror, on the side mirror.

Speaker 3 Anyway, so that was weird. PFT.
Basically, I tweeted, like, I built... No, I built.
Let's put some context, Rob. Okay, let's put it on.
Billy tweeted out last night. This is word for word, his tweet.

Speaker 3 I saw it. I retweeted.
I signal boosted it, as they say. Looking to buy sub-adult hens in the tri-state area.
DM me, built a new hen house, and have a lot more room. All right.

Speaker 3 So that. I'm getting a new.
So the. There were lots of red flags.
I saw somebody call you Jeffrey Eggstein. I legitimately.

Speaker 3 I alerted the FBI. I said, I have a hen house.
I wonder if you can't do that. What did the language mean?

Speaker 3 But it's obvious that you should investigate.

Speaker 3 No.

Speaker 3 No, I built, I got a bigger hen house because the hens got bigger and I need a new heating system. I'm looking to buy sub-adults.
Heating system in the chicken.

Speaker 3 Because the hens, they're not fully adults, so I wanted to get them the same age. I didn't know what else to call it.
Sub-adults? Well, they weren't chicks, and they're not adult hens yet.

Speaker 3 So juvenile, like sub-adults. Teenagers? I don't know what it's like.
They don't lay adults.

Speaker 3 Teenagers, yeah, 40 years ago. I'm trying to get these chickens to start laying eggs.
He's trying to get these sub-adult teenagers pregnant. No, oh, it's stupid.

Speaker 3 Wow. Anyway, stepped in it again.
No.

Speaker 3 So anyway, I think the FBI. There was

Speaker 3 maybe a possibility that you could have had this thought and not tweeted it out. Yeah.
Well, legitimately, I want like low-key. Like, I have already located a place to get hens, so it worked.
Right.

Speaker 3 So I have

Speaker 3 chickens. The hens justify the means of

Speaker 3 doxing yourself as a sub-adult. No, the hens justify the means.
Oh,

Speaker 3 and then you tweeted out a picture of your cock right afterwards. Yes, I started putting out pictures of my chickens so everyone knew I actually have chickens.
Right, right, right.

Speaker 3 Right. It makes sense.
All this makes sense. Totally.
All right. Hey, what's your firefest? I was walking Norman.
Obviously, he had a week. He had quite a week.
What happened?

Speaker 3 One week ago today, you guys saw a picture of his dick. I tweeted out on Friday night.
He's doing okay, but we were walking in public in a pretty busy place, and two guys were like across the street.

Speaker 3 We're like, Big Dick Norman!

Speaker 3 Dude, that's a stud. He's a stud.
He knows it. However, people think that they're saying that to you.
Correct.

Speaker 3 You're Big Dick Norman. Correct.
Correct. That's also cool.
And I just had to keep walking, and people were looking at me like I was Big Dick Norman. That's cool, too.
That's very cool.

Speaker 3 No, it's my dog. Yeah.
Who has the big dick? Yeah.

Speaker 3 If you see Hank in public, don't call him Big Dick Dick Norman. Do not.
Don't yell it at him. Make sure when you say Big Dick Norman, you point point at his dog.
Right. Yeah.

Speaker 3 Just anything below his waist level. Point around that area.

Speaker 3 PFT, yours? My Fire Fest is, I guess I'm a narc because I alerted the authorities. But you need it.

Speaker 3 Yeah, I guess. But you did.
You know what? You did the right thing. Yeah, I mean, I guess if you want to call me a snitch or a Karen, that's fine.
But I really, I want to stop. What about you?

Speaker 3 Let's see the coupe log. Someone's looking for some adults.
The authorities need to be alerted. Yes.

Speaker 3 Jake, do you have one? I do. I think it was Monday or Tuesday.
It dropped to, I think, mid-30s. So it was time to rip out the winter jacket.
Yeah. Mine's broken.
Zippers. What? Zippers are screwed up.

Speaker 3 It's been six years. Four years in Syracuse, two winters in Burlington.
It's time to get a jacket.

Speaker 3 And that jacket's seen some shit in cities like that.

Speaker 3 Is this Jake doing his first, like, I need a free jacket?

Speaker 3 I don't know.

Speaker 3 Our boys growing up. No, no.

Speaker 3 It's very cold, Jake.

Speaker 3 I just love that that's your Fire Fest. Like, our two sons, one has a zipper broken, the other is trying a black market for sub-adult hens

Speaker 3 you couldn't be more different did you have the paperwork for this if you're in the tri-state area and you have a chicken farm or no

Speaker 3 whenever you'll say when i say tri-state area it sounds way too official why calls all people in the tri-state area have you been part of a fraud no just like

Speaker 3 have you have you given your sub-adult chickens to tell what you called the he they're not full i don't want to put a bunch of full-grown hens with the younger hens and then they like there's some fucked up situation you really want to get pennsylvania chickens you're cool with Pennsylvania chickens?

Speaker 3 That's not in a tri-state. Wait, Pennsylvania's not a tri-state area? No, no, New Jersey, Connecticut, New York.
Yeah, fuck that. Yeah,

Speaker 3 you definitely don't want Connecticut hens. No, this is rich.

Speaker 3 Those aren't

Speaker 3 they don't lay eggs.

Speaker 3 So, yeah, I actually want to buy some hens because you can't just order them online like chicks. Yeah, I know.
You actually have to go pick them up because you can't ship hens.

Speaker 3 All right, what's the number? What number? 69. 18.
8. 69.
8. 1.
Do you pick 69 every time? Yeah, it's more likely. Because it's funny.
I can't.

Speaker 3 I feel like we have to mix it up. Eight, eight, eight.

Speaker 3 Kangaroos can't jump backwards. We already did that one.
No. Wednesday.
Yeah. They didn't get it on record.

Speaker 3 Four. Eight.

Speaker 3 17.

Speaker 3 What a one. No, it's not.
It's not. Damn.
17 ever happened. Oh, my God.
What the fuck? What? You usually pick 17. Are you serious?

Speaker 3 Oh, Hank, that's too dark. How many times did you pick 17? Huh? A lot.
A lot.

Speaker 3 Jake started picking 18. I've been picked 18 since day one, so Hank thinks I'm cucking him by doing that.

Speaker 3 Did Ryder curse? No. No, no, no.
Jake doesn't curse.

Speaker 3 You won't go back to 17 next time.

Speaker 3 Lightning strikes twice. Love you guys.

Speaker 3 Oh, I've been coming for your love, okay.

Speaker 3 Shy it away.

Speaker 3 Oh, I've been coming for your love of king. Take

Speaker 3 on

Speaker 3 me.

Speaker 3 Take

Speaker 3 me

Speaker 3 on.

Speaker 3 I'll be

Speaker 3 gone.

Speaker 3 Let's go

Speaker 3 to

Speaker 3 needless to say

Speaker 3 I'm all set in spot means nobody knows what.

Speaker 3 So it lives, life is okay.

Speaker 3 Say after me.

Speaker 3 Life's not better to be safe than sorry. Pay up to me.

Speaker 3 Life's not better to be safe than sorry.

Speaker 3 Take

Speaker 3 on

Speaker 3 me.

Speaker 3 Take

Speaker 3 me

Speaker 3 up.

Speaker 3 I'll be

Speaker 3 gone

Speaker 3 every day.

Speaker 3 Things that you say,

Speaker 3 Moe, just to flame my worries away.

Speaker 3 You're all the things I've got to remember. If you're shy and away,

Speaker 3 I'll be coming for you anyway.

Speaker 3 Take on

Speaker 3 me,

Speaker 3 take

Speaker 3 me

Speaker 3 up

Speaker 3 I'll be

Speaker 3 gone

Speaker 3 you're dead

Speaker 3 I'll be gone

Speaker 3 in a day

Speaker 3 It's Pardon My Take presented by Bar Stool Sports.