NFL Week 6, Recap Every Game, Fastest 2 Minutes, And Deion Sanders

Hey, Pardon My Take listeners, you can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music.
As we progress through the season, every fan knows that big wins are hard to come by and tough losses are even harder to accept. But you know what isn't hard to accept? Discover.
Believe it or not, Discover is accepted at 99% of places that take credit cards nationwide you heard that right 99 so make a good call for your wallet and get discover based on the february 2024 nielsen report learn more at discover.com credit card on today's part of my take week six of the nfl recap of every single game. Fastest two minutes.
Our friend Deion Sanders, who's back of the week. Football guy of the week.
It's just a great PMT Monday. You love it.
We love it. We love to do it.
Interesting week. Weird games.
We're going to recap it all. Also, bonus for all you base seam heads uh we'll be watching the final two innings did you say based seam heads i was going to say baseball heads and then i remembered you coined seam heads and we will be watching the final uh two innings of the dodgers braves game which i'm sure will not end by the time we end this show.
Well, if Kershaw comes in, yeah, it probably will.

Playoff Kershaw.

But before we get to all of that, we are brought to you by our friends.

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Okay, let's go. Some work to be done.
No place to hang out or wash in. And then I can't lay all on the sun.
Oh, no. We're gonna rock down to Electric Avenue.
And then we'll take it higher. Oh, we're gonna rock down to Electric Avenue.
It's Pardon My Take presented by Barstool Sports. Welcome to Pardon My Take presented by the Cash App.
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Today is Monday, October 19th. Week 6.
SACE. Week SACE.
How do you say week in Spanish? Semana sace. Semana sace.
We start in Nash, Vegas, where Anthony Ferkser, I barely even know her, and A.J., what can Brown do for you combined for three scores in a shootout? Derek Henry Kissinger blazed the Ho Chi Minh Trail through the Texans' defense. Some may say Will Kane Fuller was acting in bad faith on Sunday, but he was just asking questions like, can the Titans' defense guard him? And the answer is no.
In a twist of irony, noted police hater NWA's Will Straight Outta Compton is now touting a 5-0 record.

Titans 42, Texans 36.

In Indianapolis, where Giovanni Bernardini isn't just a token back,

helping the Bengals rush out to an early first half lead.

The game switched back and forth, and the Bengals were getting there before Jack Mioff Doyle scored the go-ahead touchdown.

In the fourth quarter, Jesse Master Bates had a good grip on the ball, preventing Phil Rivers from scoring again, but the Bengals' final drive went up in a sick vape cloud as he hit that Julian Blackman interception of Joe Burrow. Colts 31, the Bengals 26.
To a Western PA where Mercedes Ben Roethlisberger got into a high speed chase claypool. Seven minutes in Kevin.
Stefanski tried to make out like a bandit but got the door shut in his face when the Browns stepped up a class. Some are calling the Dolphins trade last year.
The Lufthansa heist as Minka Coat Fitzpatrick has the whole squad looking a bunch like a bunch of good fellas. Take it back.
Take it back. Take it back for six.
The last time the Browns won Pittsburgh, you still had hair, boom. Too soon, Teej.
Steelers 38. Browns 7.
What? In Jacksonville, two pussies rubbing up against each other in the scissor bowl. TJ Hakkasan got into the club.
That's what the kids call the end zone teach. And Matt Cabin's Patricia looked like a chubby fat faced little doll.
James, here's to you Mrs. Robinson came up shorter than his fantasy owner Mike Florio with only 29 yards rushing on Sunday.
Many are asking if the Jaguars have toxoplasmosis as Jacksonville loses five straight and Doug Marone is clinging to his ninth life. The Lions 34, the Jaguars 16.
Some spread. Up to New England where Philip Lindsay Buckingham ripped Stevie Nicks Belichick's heart out one more time as the coach could still hear the Broncos offense forever move the chain.
Ryan Lizzo took a DNA test, and turns out he's 100% win of itch.

Can't catch and played like a bum-bum beat on bum-bum bidet.

Did I do that right, Teach?

Nailed it, boom.

Vic Onlyfangio made a business decision to exploit Cam,

and the Broncos shocked the Patriots in Foxborough 18-12.

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Thank you, Teej. Skull Komet dipped into the end zone, and these Bears were tasting grisly.
Mike Davis Love III had the short game working, but it was the Monsters of the Midway that Matt ruled the day, as Khalil McMillor and the Bears D had one of their best days ever. Now swimming at the top of the NFC.
Norris. Bears 23.
Panthers 16. What? What? And Tampa Baywatch where Levante David Hasselhoff attacked the cheeseheads like a late night shirtless hamburger.
On the offensive side of the ball, Cam Anderson-Bright seemed to be running in slow motion. But his counterpart, Rob Gronkowski, had a Carmen Electra performance.
Tom Brady traded the Bucs offense like family, giving them mouth-to-mouth in a blowout win. And in a touching tribute to former Bucs legend Jameis Winston, Aaron Rodgers threw a pick-six and did inappropriate things with his groin.
Tampa Bay 38, the Green Bay Kelly Packards 10. We finish in the city by the Bay, Santa Clara, with the Battle of the Wiz kids.
The balls seem to shrink in George Costanza Kittle's big hands, and don't call him Coco because the coronavirus can't catch him in the open field. Robert Tiger Woods brought his second and third cell phones and turned on the burners.
You a sex addict? You addicted to sex? You got a problem with sex? Speaking of Tiger Woods, Trent Reznor Williams said, I want to fuck you like an

animal, blocking for the Niners run game.

And contrary to popular belief,

Jimmy Hoffa Garoppolo

is very much alive. As he said to

Richard Sherwin Williams, I heard

you paint houses. Niners,

Rams, we're still

watching with three minutes left.

Alright, week six. We don't have a score because it's still going.
The Rams just hit a bomb to actually make it a one-score game. We said to ourselves, let's start taping because this game feels out of reach.
And just like that, we also have the Cody Bellinger and the Dodgers just hit a home run. So the Braves are the Braves.
We have those games still going on, like we said at the start. We have two innings left in the baseball game, three minutes left in the football game, but we have week six to recap PFT.
Yeah, I'm very excited about week six. It was a weird week.
Not so many great matchups. Big fuck you to the schedulers for only giving us two afternoon games, one of which was the Dolphins and the Jets.
So really just one and a half afternoon games to watch. This is a situation where they should take, like, I don't know, call it the Lions game from earlier, play it on time, but then just, like, show it to us as it's happening, as if it were happening in real time on the Red Zone channel in the afternoon game, just so I can, like, you know, I can pretend that there are three games going on in the afternoon.
Right, right. What were you going to say, Hank? I'm just confused because I asked that question on Twitter and everyone was like, I said, who chooses this? And they said, the networks decide it.
But is it the networks or the NFL? Who's in charge here? Who can we yell at? Who can we yell at? Well, who's what you're saying? Should the NFL be like, well, fuck you, networks. We want to entertain our fans.
Yeah. So is it the networks that run the NFL does the NFL run the networks and it was the the afternoon slate was horrendous yes like it was we'll get to it but those games were absolute snoozers um all right so let's start with the Sunday night game like I said we're gonna we'll update the break I mean the Braves actually let's just start with this Atlanta sports fans I'm so sorry I'm so sorry because I knew the minute that the Falcons won that the Braves would lose because you can't have both teams winning the same day.
It just wasn't going to happen. And Georgia being like, this is when we're going to get Saban and, you know, shortened season and the defense is unbelievable.
Just it's really, really sad for Atlanta. I just feel really bad.
I really do. Well, I mean, you never know because it is the seventh inning right now so they could come back and tie playoff Kershaw playoff Kershaw could come in and give us all a little treat I mean baseball's gotta be happy if it's gonna be the Dodgers and the Rays as opposed to the Braves and the Rays yes yes Florida Georgia Lions series I just want to say I'm sorry so at the taping at the time we're taping this they're down 4-3 in this bottom of the seventh I'm sorry maybe they'll come back we will update if it happens but right now say I'm sorry.
So at the time we were taping this, they're down 4-3 in the bottom of the seventh. I'm sorry.
Maybe they'll come back. We will update if it happens.
But right now, I'm sorry. I feel bad.
All right. Sunday Night Football, the Battle of the Wiz, kids.
Did you hear Al Michaels? And I actually, I'm okay with him screwing this up. He pretty much implied when he was saying, like, this is the son of shanahan and john gruden going up against each other i was like wait that actually makes sense let's just start calling sean mcveigh john gruden's son that's all he ever wanted to be in life yes i mean if you gave sean mcveigh the option right now of disowning his own parents and being adopted by john gruden he would absolutely take that in a heartbeat they also had the anecdote of of the two of them not being – they're very close, but they can't talk to each other in the season because all they can talk about is football, so they're afraid they're going to tip each other off on what they're trying to do.
So they just cut off all communication. They just can't.
It's like us doing Save It For The Show. Right, exactly.
They're like, we can't do this because i will accidentally tell you

something cool i found out in my hours and hours of film study and then you'll use it against i always just love when these two teams play each other and we get to see all the pictures of how like the entire uh washington r words coaching staff was filled with the best coaches in the nfl and let them all walk and let them all walk away right now yes this this game though to me was a classic NFL game in the case of you're never as bad as you look and you're never as good as you look. Like, the 49ers looked so bad against the Dolphins last week.
And everyone was throwing dirt on them. And everyone was saying they suck.
And the Rams have looked, for the most part, pretty good this season. but unless you're really truly one of the worst teams in the NFL,

you're really, truly one of the worst teams in the NFL, you're just always a little bit better than your last game if your last game was a horrific loss. Yeah, especially if it was in primetime.
Right. Especially if everybody paid attention to it and watched it.
That's a major. And Kyle Shannon's such a good coach.
Kyle Shannon's a very good coach. He's not going to have them suck.
There are certain coaches coaches in the nfl it's like even if they don't have even if they have injuries even if their roster isn't great they're still not going to suck and they could still they could lose a lot like remember when they when they had uh nick bones playing the whole year and and i think they won like three or four games yeah they were still competitive right and that's what good coaching is uh hand up we might have overreacted last week when saying that when saying that Jimmy Garoppolo stinks and that he's probably not the best quarterback on that roster. No, wait, we didn't say that.
We said that they brought him back too early. Yeah, so he is recovering from the high ankle sprain, or as Trey Wingo calls it.
Sometimes worse than a break. Just an ankle sprain.
But he looks a lot better tonight, and he's moving around a little bit more than he did last week. So, you know what? Maybe we overreacted a little bit, but Jimmy looks good.
But shout out to Al Michaels for saying, you're not going to see a quarterback like Jimmy Garoppolo miss an open target downfield like that ever. It's like, Al, Al, I was alive in February.
Yeah, we watched the Super Bowl. I know it feels like, hey, remember Tiger King? This was right before that.
It happened.

I watched it.

So, yeah, I think both these teams are probably good.

The NFC West is just so confusing to me.

Yeah.

Because I don't think that there's like, obviously the Seahawks are head and shoulders.

But then their defense.

But then their defense kind of stinks too.

And they play the weirdest games ever.

Right.

So any team in the NFC West could beat any other team in the NFC West.

It is the most, I would say the most exciting division in the NFC West could beat any other team in the NFC West. It is the most, I would say, the most exciting division in the NFL.
And maybe it's just payback for that year, like what, 10 years ago when the 7-9 and 9 Seahawks won the division? The Beastquake. The Beastquake year.
So this is payback. Thank you.
It took you 10 years, but this is payback. We appreciate it.
People forget that the Seahawks used to be in the AFC. Yeah.
They're just a very strange franchise. Yes, they are.
So, looks like the Niners, should we say they're back? Should we declare them back? Yeah, Niners are officially back. Also, George Kittle is 100% back because I don't know how he got that open, but he deserves a couple easy ones.
Yes. Like, he gets so many of the hard ones where he has to fight off an entire team and be a like man up like a bear and a lion and just fighting through everyone every now and then it's good to see him get one and just have no one around yeah get to run like 10 yards in the open field without somebody trying to like rip his jaw off yes but uh yeah jimmy g looks pretty good i'd say the i mean t Trent Williams looks awesome, too.
They're having him block Aaron Donald one-on-one a little bit and kind of dominate him. But yeah, the Niners are officially back, 100% back, meaning that they'll probably finish like 9-7 or whatever.
Right, exactly, because they have a gauntlet coming up, actually. All right, let's get into the Sunday games.
We'll start early. By the way, this was overarching theme for this week was every single Fox, CBS, NBC, figuring out how it started, how it's going meme.
And absolutely butchering them. They had the one.
We were laughing so hard because they had the Big Ben one where it was Big Ben in high school and then Big Ben winning the Super Bowl, which happened like 10 years ago. So I don't know how it's going.
How's it going? But it's so funny when an entire industry figures out a meme at the exact same time because we saw it in every game. In every game, they were showing us how it's going, how it started.
Next week, we're going to have the Pope meme. That's going to be on.
I hope we get planking at some point this year. Planking? Yeah.
Yeah. That would be sick.
Planking. I do feel like planking is due for a comeback, though.
Absolutely. Tua should have planked on the field after the game.
Planking and the Bernie. Yes.
Those are two things. Take a flyer on him.
Yeah, why not? When the internet was cool. Oh, one other thing about the Sunday night game, and I think it just went final.
Yeah, so 24-16, Niners. Jimmy G, he knows when the camera's on him.
He's giving that little smile. Well, he's hot.
Yeah. That's the smile of a guy that knows that he's currently looking hot while he's smiling.
Yes. He knows when the camera's on.
Like, any given moment, you could just press pause when Jimmy Garoppolo's on there, and you'd end up with like a 10 out of a 10 Bumble profile picture from him. Right.
And he's got, you know, the gold. It looks hot.
The whole thing is looking hot. Jimmy the Greek.
I love when the Niners wear those uniforms they wore tonight. They're pretty sick.
And the Rams, I'm not a fan of those ones. You don't like the blueberries? I like the blueberries better than I like the grays.
The 50 shades of gray. The Veruca salts.
Just get their asses kicked when they wear those. That's true.
All right, let's go into them. Ravens, 30.
Eagles, 28. This game was actually very much in hand.
Carson Wentz pulled a little bit of a Brett Favre where he was terrible in the first half and then brought them back in the fourth quarter. He was so bad in the beginning of the game.
They had their first six drives. They didn't get a first down.
They'd have Jalen Hurts was actually the one who got their first first down. Yeah.
It's a little quarterback controversy for you. But so I have actually two takeaways from this game and the first one is i'm still buying the eagles yeah so i think that they're they could have beaten the ravens today they could have been there's a possibility i still think they have the talent like if they ever get healthy but the eagles will never get healthy if that's like it's always a nice thing to say like it's dangling out in the future if we have a 100% healthy roster, we could beat most teams.
I think in the Eagles' case it's true, but you can't count on the Eagles to ever field a healthy roster. It's like betting on France to win a war.
No, they're not going to do it, but I'm still buying them because the NFC East is terrible, Dak Prescott got hurt. And the next four games for the Eagles

are Giants-Cowboys-Giants-Browns.

I think they're going to go at least

three and one. And we're going to be sitting here

being like, watch out for the Eagles.

They're looking pretty good.

And Carson Wentz,

I think we talked about it a couple weeks ago, but

it was the Niners game, the Sunday night Niners game.

He's kind of turned a corner of

you're not terrible all the time. Right.
When he's running with the ball, we talked about it last week, I think, how he extends himself and goes completely horizontal. But when he's getting tackled, he doesn't have the internal clock that's like it's time to go down.
You'll see two different sides of the same coin, Ben Roethlisberger and Carson Wentz. They both try to extend plays longer than they should.
Yeah. But at least Big Ben has the good sense to fake an injury before he gets actually injured.
Right. And crumples to the ground and takes a couple plays to shake it off.
Carson Wentz doesn't know to fake an injury before he gets actually injured. So it looks like there's a pack of seven wildebeest trying to tear.
He's like a wildebeest and they're like a bunch of hyenas trying to tear him down and he ends up taking like that one extra step and tweaking himself yep and this is going to sound very very stupid but i actually believe it we you know patrick mahomes i have that theory that no one hits him hard because everyone likes him the remember the rumor that like no one liked carson wentz in his locker room which was debunked by our friend chris long andunked by other people, but whatever. There was smoke there, and I don't think Carson Wentz is a bad teammate, but I do think other players on other teams are like, fuck, this guy's a bad teammate.
I'm a Nick Foles guy. I'm going to fuck him up.
Right, they know that they're not going to get any payback if they hit him late. Like, I heard you're a bad teammate, dude, which could be.
It's totally not true, but I think that that actually matters, and they're like, fuck this, let's get him. The Eagles are also starting to use a lot of the pop passes, which we saw so many pop passes from Jimmy G tonight.
His passing stats are probably inflated by like three times. Yeah.
Just based on those little handoffs that happened to travel like an inch forward. Yeah, it's Drew Brees' offense.
Yes, exactly, except they're throwing an underhand, which Drew Brees should probably think about doing. But in this Ravens-Eagles game, Lamar Jackson, we've talked about Lamar Jackson.
Okay. I think you're going to say my second point before I do.
I like this. No, go, go, go.
You can bring it up. Lamar, he's not really that great playing with a small lead either.
He needs a big lead. Yeah, he needs an enormous lead.
Which he can get you. He can get you a big lead sometimes.
But he's not really, we talk about him not being able to come from behind at all. Even if you're up by like two scores, he's limited sometimes.
And the Ravens got penalized a lot in this game. But I just, if you're a Ravens fan, I know I've had my history calling them frauds and all that stuff I think even a Ravens fan who hates me for saying that will admit that the offense does not look like it did last year I mean last year they were incredible last year their run game was better than some teams past game they were just ripping off yards left and right and essentially unable to be stopped this year they still look good but it's that extra gear that's like they don't really have and I think it's actually not Lamar because Lamar you know you could maybe say the passing game hasn't clicked for those big plays but it's actually the other part of the running game outside of Lamar that hasn't been like just absolutely killer yeah where they're just running it down your throats and Mark Ingram and and they're going for you know seven yards a pop it just doesn't feel the same so I don't know if they'll figure it out I don't know what's going on but I think it's okay and Ravens fans you can tell me if I'm being unfair right now which I don't think I think deep down you know the same thing that it just feels a little bit different yeah I think the passing game doesn't look as good as it did last year at all like lamar hasn't made as many of the home run plays haven't been there either yeah exactly uh i do think that the kicking game is still on point and justin tucker was watching him kick he kicks like he's gonna hit the moon one day yeah like his field goals go so fucking high but i'd like to give a shout out i don't know who their holder is i think they have the best holder in the league no one talks about that would make sense the holding game is a very it's a very intricate part of the kicking game makes sense because you have to put it down on that one blade of grass that the kicker wants it on yep they have an underrated holder whoever that is yes good job good job to you hold wait it might be that guy we oh no we had the long morgan cox right that's morgan cox the cox The Cox.
Cialis Campbell, Calais Campbell, he said after the game, this team has championship DNA. And I thought that was interesting because he's – as a person who's been in the Cardinals and Jaguars locker room for 10 years, he knows championship DNA.
You can feel it. When he sees it.
Yes. But, by the way, he's probably got the best voice in the NFL.
Oh, yeah. Klaise Campbell.

Oh, yeah.

You can say anything.

Big time.

It's going to sound great.

But, yeah, I think the Ravens defense isn't the same Ravens defense

that we think that is.

The whole team in this, again, the Ravens are very, very good.

We're nitpicking a 5-1 team.

I'm excited.

I think they play the Steelers next week.

I'm excited for that game. We deem them worthy of examination.
Well, right. It just feels a little bit different and it's okay to...
I mean, you could make the argument for every team right now, so we're probably doing a little bit too much in nitpicking, but what else are you going to say for a 5-1 team? They're really, really good. It also feels a little bit different than last year when they were just killing people.
Raven's holder holder is their punker, Sam Cooke. Oh, there we go.
Great holder. So I saw, too, the Eagles Twitter account.
Whoever runs that account, everyone knows that I'm obsessed with the tweets after a bad loss. They tweeted, fought until the end.
And let me tell you, Eagles fans were not happy with that. Really? Yeah.
Because that is like the Eagles fan way. Maybe if the Eagles...
We're knocked out, but we're still fighting. Exactly.
We're going to keep throwing punches and throwing up on people. There was a video of a brawl in the 300 level with 5,000 people in the stands, and Philly still found a way to fight, which was awesome.
Yeah, well, the dude was wearing a Ravens jersey inside Lincoln Financial Field. He asked for it.
He field he was asking for you have to ask about the elements of provocation um and then the the last thing i had for this game we had we discussed this a little bit off air because we were just we sit and basically every sunday we sit watch every game uh make jokes and half-baked ideas and say stupid shit and the two-point conversion was terrible by the eagles to to end the game and i said that doug uh peterson seems like a guy that if you peel back his skull his skin in his skull there just be a big bowl of beef stew in where his brain should be and like that just felt i don't know why but it feels like he's a beef stew brain type of guy yeah just hearty uh maybe not the most intelligent person but like masculine but good fills you up fills you up also he feels like a guy who if he was if like you made beef stew he would get force yes he's like yeah let me have some more and then just start farting on your couch you'd be like that that actually a compliment to the chef. And his brain gets better over the course of the season as all the ingredients start to marinate and marry inside of itself.
So the later you go with him, the stronger he is as a coach. John Harbaugh's brain I feel like would be maybe just popcorn.
No. He's a bunch of popcorn.
No, John Harbaugh, he's like pasta he's he here's what he is he's like he's linguine with like butter like a very simple sauce yeah i like that i also say he's uh a bunch of perfectly sharpened pencils okay sitting like he's a pencil holder inside of his brain and he's got a pencil sharpener in there like the one it's yes it's a bunch of pencils that are of being sharpened. Right.
And the old school Boston pencil sharpener that used to be mounted to your wall. Yeah.
So we'll start. We got to start updating coaches and what's inside of their brains if you peeled it back.
I feel like Belichick has just like a hyper intelligent pissed off frog. Yeah.
Or he has. Belichick just has like a mini Ernie Adams.
Yeah. Like a doll set.
Or just Ernie Adams playing in his office. Or my theory is maybe Belichick has another Belichick inside of his head.
Yeah. That's controlling the outside Belichick.
Yes. Like the alien in Men in Black.
There was like one of those small ones that is like pulling all the levers. I like that.
I think there's just a smaller Bill Belichick that's telling big Bill Belichick what to do. And some of them are super easy.
Like Bruce Arians, I think we can both agree, is just Mai Tai. Crown Royal.
It's just a shitload of Mai Tai. Just sloshing around in his brain.
It's a purple Crown Royal velvet bag. And then inside of that, it's a Mai Tai.
He's like, yeah, he wants a little some of Bruce's special sauce. Yeah.
And it's like, wait, is this Crown Royal? No, it's my Mai Tai. Yeah.
Oh, yeah. So we'll update the...
And oh, for Sunday Night Football, I think in Shanahan's brain... A BMX bike.
Yeah, it's a BMX bike with pegs on it, but it's also a little mini Shanahan saying, don't talk to McVay and vice versa. Yeah.
Being like, whatever you do, don't talk to your friend. Or they've got each other inside their own heads.
Yes. Sean McVay has a mini cal shanahan head right underneath the surface with the bmx bike and then in shanahan's head is a little mcveigh with his shirt off yeah and maybe uh a perfectly perfectly sharpened beard with his philips norelco one blade and in free shout out inside that head of sean mcveigh inside cal shanahan's head is john gruden said yes oh p carroll that isn't there a wall in seattle with the gum wall yeah that's just his brain his brain yeah it's just thousands and thousands of pieces of chewed gum either that or his brain is just wrapped in it with a double bubble wrapper like the yellow one with the twisty ends on each side yeah it will know it's actually a gun it's it's gum but the gum makes up the twin Towers.
Oh, yeah. Inside of his brain.

For sure.

All right.

We'll update as we go along the season.

But yeah, beef stew for Doug Peterson.

Yes.

Nice, hearty, big chunks of beef.

Maybe some barley in there, too.

Yeah.

Really warms you up.

Yes.

I'm just thinking of Mike Tomlin.

He's just got a bunch of riddles in his head.

Oh, Jesus.

It's a bunch of really hard to figure out riddles.

Yeah.

I think it's like a fortune. He wrote for himself.'s like a fortune cookie, but the cookie is a brick or a cinder block.
You have to crack open the cinder block and then you pull out a riddle that makes absolutely no sense to anybody except for Mike Tomlin. His brain is just an enigma machine that's designed with a code that only he knows how to translate.
Oh, fuck.'ll do more they're they're off the cuff so we'll as we come up with them all right next game texans titans uh romeo crinnell i love this decision so the texans played really well against titans they take the lead 36 to 29 with two minutes left to play romeo crinnell to try to go up nine. Doesn't get it.
The Titans come down, score, kick the extra point, tie the game, and then go into overtime and win. I love this move by Romeo Cornell.
I know it's probably not the best math move, but you're one and four. You're the interim head coach.
You're not going to get the head coaching job. Fuck it.
You know what I mean? Like, fuck it. Like, this is one of those.
Because nine is more points than seven points is. Right.
And this is one of those decisions where the numbers might not back it up, but it's a total gut feel of how your team is. And like, hey, let's go try to fucking get a win.
And also to steal a win. You can't stop Derrick Henry.
You haven't been able to stop him the entire time so you might as well basically romeo cornell was admitting they're going to score on us hopefully we can stop them on their two-point conversion right right and and and fuck with it no no if they got the two-point conversion they would have they would have won the game because they would have been up nine that's right yeah so so they're saying like he's just going for the way he's saying if we kick a field goal they're going to come down the field and score and score, and then we have to try to stop Derrick Henry on a two-point conversion, which we probably won't be able to do either. So fuck it.
Let's just try to end it. Let's just end it.
Also, big shout-out to Mike Vrabel, the time traveler. Mike Vrabel figured out a new way to bend time.
So remember in the playoffs when it was him and Belichick having a stare down, trying to figure out who can milk the most time off the clock, who can stop the clock in these weird ways. It was in the fourth quarter, and Vrabel did an intentional too many men in the huddle on defense because it was like second and one.
The Texans were obviously going to convert either on the next play or the play after that. They would have milked another 40 seconds to a minute and a half off the clock.
Vrabel took the too many men penalty, gave them a first down, but it also stopped the clock. So he ended up saving himself like another 30 seconds of time.
This guy. He is the clock master.
He's the timekeeper. Yes, he knows every little trick.
He does. And then I think Deshaun Watson is the most sympathetic character in the NFL right now.
Yeah. Oh, poor Deshaun Watson Twitter world that just goes off.
Like, Deshaun Watson is getting wasted. Deshaun Watson, this is so sad.
Yes. It's not only that, but he's actually using his power for good now across the entire NFL because now it became, oh, Deshaun Watson's not even going to get to touch the ball in overtime.
The overtime rules are broken. They stink.
So now they need to change the overtime rules because of Deshaun Watson. We went through this with Patrick Mahomes in the playoffs a couple years ago.
Even that couldn't get it done. But Deshaun Watson is like, everyone just looks at him and is like, man, I'm sorry, you're really good.
I wish that we could help you out a little bit more. Maybe that's the new rule.
The rules stay as is, but if Deshaun Watson is involved, he definitely gets to touch the ball at least once. We want to see Deshaun Watson get – and the funny thing is if he got the ball in overtime, he probably just would have gotten drilled and broken his back.
Yes. Quick update, by the way, to your good-bad teams.
I think the Texans are number one now. Texans are number one.

Because the Vikings, which we'll get to, they've lost that power. They stink, yeah.
Because the Texans are going to be, I think their schedule gets a little bit easier. They did a good job blocking for Deshaun today.
Will Fuller has not been hurt yet. I think they're going to get frisky.
I think they're going to get frisky here. They're going to win a couple games.
The Texans are definitely top of my list of team to beat a playoff team with championship aspirations late in the season and be like, damn, that sucks for them. Yes, I'll put it this way.
Later on in the season when you're going through the upcoming schedules for the teams that are in the hunt and on the bubble, when you see the Texans, that's not a surefire W that you pencil in at that point. Nope, definitely not.
Yeah, so Texans, Titans. Titans are really, really good.
Derrick Henry. Ryan Tannehill.
Yes. Ryan Tannehill is – we made all the jokes in the world, but the step has been taken.
It has fully been taken. This is not a statistical anomaly anymore because last year at the end of the year, we're like, oh, he's doing's just playing out of his head we're now six weeks into the 2020 season he's got 13 touchdowns two interceptions he's on pace for 42 touchdowns six interceptions and 4,700 yards yes he's good has there ever been a quarterback that has gotten this much better this late in his career well because this is not the same he's aging like a not a fine wine but like a a perfectly serviceable but maybe a little bit overpriced wine we'll get to it but it's pretty clear there's really only one reason behind all of this tractor cita no he got away from adam gaze yep like this is we'll we'll talk about adam gaze later when we get to the jets dolphins uh-huh but maybe the worst indictment on Adam Gase's resume is how good Ryan Tannehill is.
Well, yeah, and when you're with Adam Gase, first you must learn all the ways not to be good at football before you can really excel. It's like Socrates used to say, the wisest man knows that he knows nothing.
After spending that much time with Adam Gase, you know that you're dumb as shit, right? You're under no illusion. Like, Ryan Tannehill didn't go to Tennessee thinking, you know, the starting job was going to be handed to him, that he was, like, hot shit.
He's like, no, I know I've spent all this time with the world's biggest dunce, so I'm a blank slate right now. Right, right.
So, yeah, Ryan Tannehill, very good. Shout out our guy, Taylor Luan.
I think he might have torn his ACL. We don't have confirmation, right? They think, they fear.
They fear. I don't think it's looking good.
All right, I hope he's okay. Not positive, not reporting.
Also, to your point of good-bad teams, there are nine teams with just one win right now. It's very ugly off top.
And the Jets, double-digit teams with zero or one wins. There's a lot of shit out there.
People want Trevor Lawrence.

Yes, they do.

They do.

I don't know.

I think the Titans are good.

I just don't know.

Every game they play is close.

I guess they beat the fuck out of the Bills.

Well, we get to see them finally play the Steelers this week.

Oh, so it's Steelers-Titans this week.

Yes.

Ravens-Titans, or Ravens-Steelers is a couple weeks from now.

But, yes, Steelers-Titans. So one of those teams, well, maybe they'll tie.
That would be great. It's just not fair that Tractor Cito was the fastest ball carrier this week.
You can't be that big and also be that fast. He's so damn good, and he's good way too early in the year, which is not fair.
All right, next up, Bengals-Colts. I just wrote down poor Burrow.
That's all I wrote. Yeah.
Literally all I wrote because he's good. And there was that moment where he was trying to drive them.
And you see it with young quarterbacks when their offensive line is so, so bad. And Joe Burrow is a tough motherfucker.
But he had three seconds. And then he kind of flinched in the pocket because he was just expecting to get smoked.

But it was the one time his offensive line actually blocked for him,

and he stood back up and completed the pass.

He was like, I have no idea.

I've never been here for this long before without getting a cleat shoved into my mouth.

But I noticed one thing about Joe Burrow today.

He gets great spots after he completes passes. This has happened over the last three or four weeks.
The A.J. Green spot? Yeah, he'll throw a guy open to just about dead level with the sticks.
They'll give him another yard. I think it's the refs being like, hey, we know your offense sucks.
Your line is not good. And the Bengals being up 21-0, I think we all thought, okay, well, how are the Bengals going to blow this? Because it was 21-0, but it was like, okay, this can't.
They've got to be up 28-0 for us to start really thinking. And of course, the Colts, I think, were down only three at half.
The Colts, I don't know what to make of the Colts. I really don't.
I think I have to stop. I'm not betting on them for the rest of the year because I just can't.
They're too weird. They're just a weird team.
And Phil Rivers has just gone to full shot put. If you watch Phil Rivers, you isolate his throwing motion at this point of his career.
You would not think he plays any sport. No.
You'd be like, that's the first time that guy. You'd think he's a CrossFitter.
delivers mail right that's what i would not across phil river's a crossfitter no i'm saying the the like athletic build but doesn't know how to hold the ball right you throw him a ball and he'll drop it yeah what's going on here to me he looks like an aging college basketball coach yeah like someone who who used to be the hot shit that's kind of let themselves go a couple seasons worth of the grind has gotten to him. He just looks like a sweaty...
He does look like a sweaty UPS driver. Yeah.
And yeah, he's going like full sidearm with a lot of his throws. He's not fully extending his elbow, but it works sometimes.
And when they got out to that 21-0 lead, when the Bengals took the lead, like you were saying, it was not safe. I said when they were up 21-0, I was like, they're going to blow this game.
It's like if you have a dream and everything in your dream is happening so perfectly, you tell yourself in your dream, like, this is a dream. This isn't real.
Yeah, this is not real. This is not working out for me.
No chance. This is going to happen.
And then sure enough, they woke up in the second half. And you remember Geno Atkins? Yeah.
Is he still a thing? I think so. I haven't heard the name Geno Atkins in at least 18 months.
I don't think so. And he's really good.
Yeah. No, I mean, he was incredible.
Those years, yes, he is still a thing. Those years when the Dalton Bengals, when everyone was like, watch out for the Dalton Bengals, it was pretty much because of Geno Atkins.
It was Geno Atkins and Dominic Dinsu and Aaron Donald. Oh, in the league.
Those were like the defensive tackles that you talked about. Maybe Gerald McCoy, too.
Yes. But, yeah, remember Geno Atkins? Yes.
He was good. I'd like to hear his name more often.
Yeah. Fat Randy.
Fat Randy's the best kicker in the league now. Oh, actually, he doinked more.
He doinked, which is perfect. Yes, that is.
That's actually very funny. But he also hit like a 58-yarder.
so Fat Randy is the best kicker in the league now. Actually, he doinked.
Which is perfect. That's actually very funny.
But he also hit like a 58-yarder. So Fat Randy, credit to us for pushing you to those heights.
When he doinks for it, it should just be like a giant tuba sound effect. Yeah, just following him around.
All right. Falcons, Vikings.
So the ghost of Dan Quinn. The Falcons, they have the death rattle.
They bounce back. Classic Vikings, Kirk Cousins, three interceptions.
Actually, let's start with Vikings because I have an idea for Vikings fans. Okay.
Stop rooting for the Vikings this year. Stop caring about the Vikings this year.
Pretend that the Vikings, that you are just, they're a fantasy football team and you just have Justin Jefferson. Buy his jersey, like track.
Don't track the wins and losses. Don't track the actual final score for the Vikings.
Just be like, Justin Jefferson had nine catches for 166 yards and two touchdowns. That's a win for us.
That's fun. Like, that's all you should do.
Just minimize it. Just hone just hone in only watch him and you'll probably have a lot better of a time yeah maybe maybe tune in occasionally to try to catch a glimpse of the fights that adam thielen and kirk cousins get in with each other on the sidelines the most hilarious like little lovers quarrels that they have i think we said a couple years ago was like watching two corgis in a dog fight when thielen and cousins little life vests on yeah they're they're just a door he's into the water they're the most adorbs when they fight they're so cute they have the funny little crinkle nose uh i it's like two canadians trying to like in an argument over who's gonna buy the other person's coffee right that's what that's what i assume paying ahead that's what i assume they're yelling at each other about but yeah justin is awesome I think he is he's taken the throne of the coolest new touchdown dance that I don't totally understand yet and I'll learn what the dance is what it's in relation to the gritty yeah he's doing the gritty oh yeah so like you give me another couple weeks to actually figure out wrap my brain around what the gritty is an LSU guys thing yeah you just look Yeah.
You just look awesome when you do it. Yes.
The Falcons do have the, the ghost of Dan Quinn on the sideline because at the end of the first half and the Falcons were, this was a no doubter. They were up and they were winning this game the whole time.
But at the end of the first half, there were seven seconds left. They were on the goal line, second and goal.
And they had a timeout and they ran the ball called the timeout, kicked a goal and i was like you know what it's good i actually think raheem morris was like this one's for coach yeah pouring it pouring out a yeah pouring out a three-pointer for dan yeah let's do everything you're supposed to do let's do the opposite here and make sure that we get three points i i think that it's going to come down to the falcons and the texans what they're playing for right now is the right to present the best case to Eric Biennemi to be their head coach next year. So get ready for the Falcons because Lions at Panthers, Broncos at Saints, home against the Raiders.
I think they can go 4-1 in that stretch. Let's go.
I'm buying back in. Because I don't know what it speaks to just how bad Dan Quinn was as a coach

because he's a defensive guy, but Raheem Morris had them playing defense today. Like that wasn't, it wasn't, Oh, Matt Ryan finally said Matt Ryan played great, but their defense was so much better than it has been.
So I think, I think you're going to get, I think Raheem Morris might fuck around and just get this job. We also got a rare glimpse of the supportive version of Arthur Blank lurking on the sidelines and encouragement.
Same as the non-supportive. Looked exactly the same.
He doesn't have any other look in his life. He just wants people to know that sometimes he can creep you out because he's happy.
Right. And again, Falcons winning today means the Braves had no chance of winning.

And I feel very bad for Braves fans.

They're now down to their final out just to update.

So, sorry.

But Braves fans knew this was going to happen.

I do like the Falcons jerseys today, too.

The white Falcons ones.

Yes, yes.

Those are much nicer than the fake throwback ones that they sometimes play.

Yes, yes.

Okay, before we do the next game, let's do a quick add. way kirk cousins league high 10 interceptions oh nature is healing new sponsor alert yes new sponsor alert pft we got a new sponsor very excited everyone i'm super excited hank what was that that was a that was a sponsor alert the click Yeah, sponsor alert.
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Okay, next up, Hank, Broncos 18, Patriots 12.

If I told you before this game that Drew Locke would be 10 for 24

with two interceptions and the Broncos wouldn't score a touchdown, what would you have said the final score would be? 24-6. Yeah.
So the Broncos instead decided to field goal the Patriots to death with six field goals. I love when a team wins with just field goals.
18-12. The Patriots do have a banged-up offensive line.
And they're dealing with a global pandemic. And they're dealing with a global pandemic.
They weren't allowed to practice, right? They had limited practice reps. Bill Belichick shut the facility down out of caution, safety.
He cares about the players and the safety of his people more so than winning. In a regular year, it'd be down in the dumps, doom and gloom.
But I think we all can agree that we're just worried about the players' safety and everyone getting back to no panic. You want to get through this season healthy.
Right. What do you think that the chances are that the Patriots miss the playoffs entirely this year? Zero.
Zero percent chance. Zero percent chance.
Zero percent. I think this is the first time they're under 500 in like 2002 jesus christ that's crazy that is crazy welcome to the club hank it's just it's comforting just seeing you go through what we've all gone through as fans of normal football teams but this isn't a normal year if it was a normal year it'd be a completely different story but it's like we i mean they couldn't play cam couldn't play two weeks ago they haven't been able to practice they didn't practice every team does a run-through on saturday they didn't because of covid somehow the game probably should have gotten postponed i'm not you know i'm not gonna be that guy yeah but you did but it seems like you know they postponed last week and then the same thing happened this week but since there was like a schedule problem nfl was just like yeah let's just play how feeling about camp? He led, he had like double everyone else combined rushing on the Patriots.
And also Julian Edelman had two passes. So yeah, I mean, that was kind of, I mean, that's no, that's one of those things where it's like, you can tell when the Patriots are down and they're really pulling out all the stops.
They pulled out the Edelman pass twice. Yes.
So they're just trying to get it going. I'm not, I'm not two weeks.
Give us a week of a normal practice, normal schedule, and I have no doubt that we'll be back to where we need to be. Also, the Broncos are cursed.
And the Broncos are cursed. Low-key, it's like they're just a weird team for the Patriots.
Within like two minutes of each other, Big Cat and I independently put curses on the Broncos for curse for uh for cutting our friend blake bortles over the weekend now you might say wait they can't possibly be cursed they just beat the patriots no fact check they have not scored a touchdown right since they cut blake bortles right their offense yeah andrew lock through two interceptions anemic offense yes i would say you know what this is the first time i can ever remember even thinking about using the A word, the anemic word for the Patriots offense. It does look kind of anemic, Hank.
The Miami Dolphins are ahead of you in the standings. That's fine.
I mean, it's Patriots, former Patriots coach. Brian Flores.
So you root for that? No, but it's not surprising. Hank has a flow chart.
If it's not the Patriots, then second would be Tampa Bay. And then after that, it's any coach who's ever had a cup of coffee.
Yes. Yeah.
What's wrong with that? So, Philip Lindsay was back. He looked good.
Melvin Gordon, double the DUI and then the strep throat. Those have to be related.
Yeah. Maybe he just blew into a dirty breathalyzer.
And now he can sue the Denver police officer? Yeah. This game sucked, though.
This was one of those red zone games we didn't really see much of. Just flew by.
So instead, I would like to talk about Tim Tebow's tweet. We got to talk about Tim Tebow's tweet.
So Tim Tebow on Friday, I'm actually shocked that we didn't just stop everything and do an emergency show for this tweet. Sometimes parody, like when we parody something and then someone does it for real and you're like, whoa, this is too freaky.
He tweeted, would you rather be respected or liked? Imagine if we didn't have like buttons, but instead we had respect buttons. Would you rather have 110 likes or 34 respects? Definitely 110 likes.
Why 34 respects, by the way? Why is it? That's the conversion ratio. That's how many people like your tweets but don't respect you? Uh-huh.
The remaining, like, 70 plus? Yeah. Damn.
Well, he's probably taking into account, like, ironyastic likes. Right.
So he actually understands Twitter more than you think that he does. Unbelievable.
How high was Tim Tebow when he came up with this? On life? On God? Yeah. Just huffing.
Fucking through the roof. Yeah.
Just huffing church air. Yeah.
As high as high could be. Yeah.
As high as I was when I thought that the Alabama Georgia over didn't hit and I tweeted, fuck this kicker for not hitting the field goal he fucked our over and then everyone was like dude we hit the over an hour shout out three chi that high uh so tim tebow coming up with a whole like this is a michael scott riff essentially and also it's the f button in call of duty yes f yes gives respects right is that true oh so i was just getting respects all that respects all that time? I would love it. Yeah.
I would love it. T-Ball has to pay respects of a dead guy.
Oh. Okay.
You left that point. If T-Ball came out with his own version of Twitter.com, but it was all based around mutual respect.
Respecting each other. I would smash that button on every girl on my timeline.
Yeah. Respect.
This might actually fix social media. Everyone's mad at instagram mad at twitter just have respect yeah respect book i respect when hunter biden does cocaine with his friends respect yeah done respect um all right so that was broncos patriots washington football team giants yep joe judge off the schneid he said afterwards when the players lose bad for the players.
When the players win, I'm happy for the players. So that's Joe Judge has like a singular stick figure in his brain.
Ooh, I know. Just like waving.
I would say Joe Judge has like an autographed portrait of a shirtless John Taffer in his brain with accountability tattooed across the chest yes yes so joe judge uh quite a quote but yeah the the giants have have a win this was the unofficial there's been there's going to be a lot of tank for trevor lawrence games but this was definitely one of them that we can look back at also the giants say something nice about the giants the giants defense actually is frisky they're they're decent like they're i think they're top 10 in in uh yards allowed they're they're not terrible here you can if you're a giants fan you're looking at that like maybe we can because that's really what it's all about when your team sucks is find one unit one player anything to be like well if we just build this up we'll be good think that the Giants are the best conditioned team in the NFL. They don't get very tired at the end of the game.
That's what I would focus on if I was a Giants fan. They run fast in the fourth quarter.
Yes. And now what is the football team's plan at quarterback? Because it doesn't seem like there is one anymore.
A plan. Well, Hoskins was sick.
You're giving us a lot. He still still has diarrhea.
Yeah, he's sick. So, Hoskins still has diarrhea.
He was not at the office this week at all because he's just been on the toilet shitting his brains out. They should stick with that.
They should say he was not benched for performance. He's just had the runs for the last, like, three weeks.
And that's really the only way that you can maximize trade value because they realized after the fact that, like, openly announcing that Dwayne Hoskins hasn't made a single bit of improvement since Ron Rivera's been coaching him not a great way to try to get a high draft pick for no it's when you move on from him you gotta put him back in just say yeah you have to put him back in against a shitty team hope that well I mean it doesn't get much this would have been the week probably back in for practice put him back in practice have oh have like a come out of uh of of uh practice one day where he just throws a sick pass down the sidelines to terry mclaurin for like 55 yards puts it on time yep just use that and be like his butt's better he's no longer squirting out fudge uh he's back to slaying guns so i i think that's really the only way that you can maximize the trade value because otherwise every team's just like we we know that you hate him right so and there's something up here there's something going on there's something up here it's not gonna it's not gonna work out just say it's the water in dc he's allergic to the water in dc it makes him shit all the time if he just had a new change of scenery maybe like i don't send him out to uh detroit he'd love the detroit water he'd love the san francisco water he'd love the problem is you know what There are too many quarterbacks in the NFL right now. Yes.
There aren't enough teams that have a dire, dire situation. No, there's more coming in, like Justin Fields, Trevor Lawrence, Trey Lance.
There's going to be... I do think that we're in a great spot for quarterbacks in the NFL right now.
We've got kind of a log, Jim. We've come through...
Remember a few years ago when it was like, man, the quarterback position sucks. We're on the other side of that one.
There's like a log jam of good quarterbacks that might improve to being great one day, so teams won't move on from them right now. Right.
If you look around the league, there's maybe four or five teams that you know for a fact are going to be looking to get a quarterback in the draft, and that's it. I'm thinking through the NFC East right now.
Andy Dalton's a great quarterback. Our words and the Giants are probably going to use one.
Philly, we would say that you might want to take a little bit. Jalen Hurts is pretty good.
Yeah, he's pretty good. Yeah, if you go through the divisions, there's like, I don't know, maybe five teams where it's like, you know for a fact're going to be looking.
They want a quarterback. Too many quarterbacks in the NFL right now.
All right. So next game we got Browns-Steelers.
The Browns are still the Browns. That sucks for Cleveland because you went and played Big Brother and it's been now 17 seasons.
And that was an kick like i know baker's hurt and whatever you want to throw whatever out there like you don't have chubb but that was a out and out ass kicking like the steelers defense fucked your shit up and i actually think ben he wasn't that good he did the thing where he looked at his hand after a bad throw at the beginning of the game almost giving himself like hey remember this in case i'm bad today i'm hurt um but he you know he did enough he had a nice deep bomb and chase claypool's a beast but yeah the browns that just there's there's nothing worse than thinking you have a good team and then stepping up in class and just getting the shit kicked it was a little reminder we didn't get fooled't get fooled, though. I think we knew that.
I think that was 2003. 2003 was the last time they won Pittsburgh.
I wasn't fooled. Even though the Browns are, I think, 4-2 since they had the open casket wake for Swagger.
For the original one. They've been on a good roll, but they've been playing very well for the Browns, but're still the browns get yeah get healthy um i don't like i see a lot of people out there saying the the new the new line is that baker mayfield might be short he's gotten shorter he's gotten shorter he got a rib removed well it's when he has to stay in the pocket he can't see the lanes uh well so we got to get we got to fix that height issue get some air max 720s yeah but the um yeah the steelers are good.
The Steelers are really good. I think the Steelers are one of the best teams in the AFC.
This is probably not the best week to bring it up, but I keep forgetting to when the Browns win, and who knows when the next time the Browns. You never want to take for granted that the Browns will ever win another game, so I'll just say it now.
Bill Callahan is the best offensive line coach in the NFL. Yeah.
So if you're looking – Well, because, yeah, what's his name in New England retired? Dante Skarniecki. He was probably the best.
He was, but Bill Callahan is a very, very good offensive line coach. But what's going to happen is eventually he's going to have enough success.
Like when he was in Dallas, he was a great O-line coach. When he was in Washington, a great O-line coach.
He's done a very good job in Cleveland. He's going to get promoted.
There's going to be some old-school GM, probably a Gettleman type, that will try to resurrect his career as a head coach again. And then Bill Callahan will go 5-11 three years in a row and then go back to being off as a line coach.
I'm looking at it right now. The Browns are going to be okay.
The Browns are going to be okay. They play the Bengals next.
So the Browns have the Bengals. This is just I'm picking off wins that I think they can have on the rest of their season.
Bengals, Texans, Jaguars, Giants, Jets. I just named five teams.
And so the rest of their schedule, if they can pick off one or two more wins, like they can be a 10-win team somehow here. Because there are some games that are winnable yeah yeah i'm i'm the browns don't don't jump yet don't write them off yet the steelers what's the steelers biggest weakness um well devin bush getting hurt is bad um i would actually say big ben maybe but not like there's been times where he hasn't looked fully right you know he's never going to be.
He's not prime. Big Ben.
Big Ben was never fully in his entire life. Maybe they're secondary if their pass rush isn't getting there.
By the way, TJ Watt, I think like a pitcher when a pitcher gets he has a tell TJ Watt definitely knew the snap count with Baker Mayfield. There was a few times where you can't be closer to being off sides.
but he was doing the, when you're Madden, when you just go up at the right time, he did that like four or five times. Every single time? Just perfectly.
I think the Steelers' biggest weakness is that they don't have a biggest, they don't have a glaring biggest weakness. They don't know how other teams are going to game plan for them.
Yeah. They still have to play.
If they had one thing that they really sucked at, then they would sit down every week and be like, well, we know that they're going to do this against us because we stink at kick coverage or whatever. So they don't know how to put themselves in the brain of a smart football coach that's evaluating them.
At Titans, at Ravens next to the Steelers. So we'll find out.
We will find out. We will know a lot about the Steelers in two weeks.
If I were to ask you right now, Big Cat, how old do you think Kevin Stefanski is? What would you say? Pull up a picture of Kevin Stefans would say early 40s he's he's two years older than us whoa and he's got like a full gray beard i'm looking at this guy on the sideline and i i mean that's not early 40s isn't he's 38 yeah but remember mentally we both think that or i think i'm a father so yeah i do think i'm 35 i'm 27 inside my own head but i look at kevin's i'm like how is

this this guy's at least 50 years old but yeah this is back to this is the same conversation because you see anyone in a position of power and you're like old person yes exactly like that guy is somebody's boss yeah i don't know he just he was probably with a facial 38 beard like that That's early 40s.

He's buying Everclear when he was three years old.

Yeah, you're like, oh, man, that's, hey, Kevin, that's the cops. Yeah.
I'm like, okay, boomer. He's got a job.
He's got a big job, big important job. Actually, even like some athletes that are 10 years younger than me.
I'm like, oh, that guy's old as shit. Right.
Yeah. No, this is more about you than it is Kevin Stefanski.
It's a million percent about me. But don't look at Kevin Stefanski and be like, this guy's 38 years old.
That guy looks like he's 50. No, he's just got a gray beard.
If he shaved his beard, he would definitely look 38. Probably.
It's just a gray beard. Gray, that's why I die.
It sucks that Devin Bush is hurt because he's really good. Yes.
And he's fun to watch. And you knew it.
Like, the second he got injured, he did the pound the turf. The pound the turf and then the hands on the head immediately are the two signs where a guy gets hurt.
And you're like, okay, this is actually something. And then the thumbs up as you leave being like, okay, well, that's not thumbs up.
A guy has never given a thumbs up in a scenario where he really wants to tell everybody I'm doing great.

It's our old friend Trel Withers tweet when he's like,

just once I want to see a player give the thumbs down.

Yeah.

As they tear the ACL and get carted off.

My leg is in five.

Like, I'm having a bad time.

My leg's in five different pieces.

This stinks.

All right.

We're good with Steelers-Browns?

You got anything else?

Just shout out to Mike Tomlin for waiting to put Mason Rudolph in the game until Miles Garrett was on the sideline. You don't want to be giving him flashbacks on that.
I'm going to change my mind on what Mike Tomlin's brain looks like. I think it's just a very sharp rock.
Yeah. Like an extremely sharp rock.
A lot of pointy edges. Maybe one of those fake diamonds in there.
Yeah. It's not worth anything.
Uh-huh. But it looks like it might be.
And it can do damage to you, and you're intimidated by it. It'd be a good bookend.
Yes. One other thing about the Steelers, certain franchises should not be allowed to pick up good free agents.
Like Minka Fitzpatrick going to the Steelers. Well, that wasn't a pickup.
That was a trade. Yeah.
Yeah, yeah. Or they should be allowed to acquire good players that weren't drafted.
They gave a first pick. I know, but the Steelers, they draft good enough already.
They're so good at doing that, like finding and developing talent on their own. You can't just give them another good player, like a bonus player.
Yeah. Fuck that.
Bonus players. Okay, let's do, before we do next game, let's do a quick add.
Are you wearing your whoop? I'm wearing my whoop right now. So am I.
So am I. Nothing I like more than looking at my strain after a day of losing a bunch of bets on football and realizing that I pretty much got a workout in, just sitting on the couch being terrible at gambling.
You guys have heard us talk about whoop for a while, and you know how much we love them. I love whoop.
I like checking my stats in the morning, see how recuperative my sleep was. I like using it when I'm on the Peloton.
I can tell how hard I'm pushing myself. It was actually like a godsend for me over the pandemic break when we weren't really in the office.
I would check my stats, make sure I was getting good exercise in on a day-to-day basis. Now it's bulking season, so I'm going to try to get up to 200 pounds before my next XFL tryout, so I can be a thicker kicker.
And Whoop is the perfect tool to help you train for whatever you have going on in your life. They're proud to partner with Barstool to host a virtual charity 5K on October 26th.
I'm going to run on this. I'm saying it right now.
I'm going to run in the 5K. I don't know what a virtual 5K is.
I assume that we're just going to be doing it independently. No cheating.
I'm definitely not going to cheat and make it look like I ran really, really fast. Not going to happen.
But I will be participating in that. It's during Breast Cancer Awareness Month.
You guys should do it on a bike that two of you can ride. That would be a good idea.
Yeah, tandem bike. If it doesn't rain on Fridays.
Yeah. What's up with Friday is just always being raining.
This sucks, man. This Friday, we were going to do it again.
It was raining. And it was pouring rain outside.
Yep. Our donation page is live now, so go to barstoolsports.com slash whoop5k.
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When I was playing ping pong last Thursday, I was logging this under my whoop.

I saw that my heart rate was getting up to like 148 beats per minute while playing ping pong.

That's probably not super normal or healthy to be exercising that hard

whilst playing ping pong.

Be you, King.

But I'm just doing me, and I end up winning.

Hank almost won too.

Good job, Hank.

Yeah, almost.

Almost.

Almost a good job, Hank.

Yeah.

So you can sleep better, recover faster, train smarter,

and join our fight to help raise money for MD Anderson this October with Whoop. What do you think? How fast do you think I can run that 5K? 22 minutes.
23 minutes. Yep.
That's my goal. Eight minute miles.
You got it. It's not going to happen.
Okay. The NFC North leading Bears.
Will you apologize for the Bears? The 5-1 Chicago Bears. The would you rather lose pretty or win ugly, that's a quote from Nick Foles, Chicago Bears.
The defense is back. The Bears are 5-1.
I don't give a fuck how they're winning. They're going to be underdogs every single game.
I'm going to keep betting on them. I don't care.
Chicago Bears. And fuck it.

I don't care. I do not care.
Yes.

Matt Nagy.

Matt Nagy is...

I actually think I've finally come to terms with Matt Nagy.

I actually like him

as a head coach.

I don't like him as a play caller.

So if he could just find someone else...

That's weird because that's the opposite of what he was brought in.

He was brought in because he was a hotshot play caller.

If Nick Foles could call the players,

that'd be cool. I think Matt Nagy's actually a good head coach.
I think he actually pushes the right buttons, gets some guys, you know, the club dub thing. I think it's lame, but whatever it works.
I don't like his play calling because he's always trying. like he's trying to check boxes and he has like a collection of of shiny little plays that he wants to show off that don't work and it's like just let nick foals do his thing and i i let me let me put a little tag on this the offensive line is not good it hasn't been playing well so you could be the best play caller in the world if your offensive line can't block it's going to look like shit so there's a little part of that but that for the second week in a row in a situation where he could run the ball burn more time he passes and they don't complete the pass and thank god the defense bailed them out because that would have been an all-time stupid decision there was a series series of two plays where I actually really, I think I liked what Matt Nagy was doing because I think he ran a play to set up the very next play.
He almost ran a play, ironically, where he put four tight ends in. Remember that play? Yeah, on the goal line.
It was like on the goal line. They ran just a straight up, like the most unimaginative dive of all time.
They were lined up with four tight ends, and they just gave the ball to the tailback and said, okay, plunge straight forward. Everyone knew that play was coming.
And then the very next play, they spread it out. I don't know, Warren Sharp, you can look at whatever the formation was.
I want to say the personnel was probably like... Light box.
It was like 11. It was like 11 personnel out there.
So you had one running back, one tight end, and then receivers spread out to the side. And then they ran the same type of play, the dive up the middle, which scored a touchdown that was overturned.
But he ran that first unimaginative play to set up running the exact same play out of a different formation the next time. He's got good ideas.
And so if you're coaching against him, you're like, okay, well this asshole just obviously ran in a jumbo package. And then when he spreads it all out, he's probably going to pass it this time psych left turn we're going to run it again but he does that also to the detriment of the team when you know I've talked about it before but he will oftentimes only run it out of under center and not pass it which just becomes predictable the situation that I'm talking about at the end of the game he actually said afterwards we knew we were going run run pass which is exactly what he

did against the bucks run run pass so teams might be able to figure that out matt like they might be able to figure that out that you're going run run pass there there's something about these bears wins because they're a very good team right they their record says that they're a very good team yes but there's something very unsettling i don't know very good there's some things there's super chatter around the bears right now okay so the in all honesty the defense and and i don't want to make this about mitch but comp i'm a big big believer in complementary football and the psyche of a football team and i do think the defense has their edge back knowing that they can play and maybe make a couple mistakes here and there, but fly around and also go after the ball and almost like a little bit of a freedom where if they give up a couple touchdowns, it's not game over. Right.
They can take chances. I agree with that 100%.
With Mitch, it was like, all right, we have to play a perfect game to have a chance to win. And with Nick Foles, a quarterback, it's like the margin for error is not as slim.

So we can be a little bit more free. And they have been playing a more freestyle, and it feels like they have their edge back.
So that matters. That shit does matter to me.
You can put it on a fucking spreadsheet. That shit is like human emotion, locker room, football guy shit that absolutely matters when it comes to offense and defense right but what i was saying was like after every bears win there's something deeply unsettling that prevents you from like fully enjoying it because it's a flawed team no there's a lot of different ways so yeah so this is how it's always even though you win always be you're thinking back and it's like raising a lot of questions you're like yeah it was i guess we won but i'm very very troubled it's like watching a Werner Herzog movie.
You're like, you, win, you're thinking back, and it's like raising a lot of questions. You're like, yeah, it was, I guess we won, but I'm very, very troubled.
It's like watching a Werner Herzog movie. You sit, and you think about it later, and you're like, that's really fucked up.
It was really good. The Bears will never be perfect.
They're just not. The Chiefs have been perfect.
Last year, there were times when they were like, oh, that's a perfect team. The Patriots have done that.
Even the Ravens, when they won the Super Bowl, you can list all these teams. They're like, oh, yeah, they have no real weakness.
If they're playing their best game, they'll beat you 10 times out of 10. If the Bears are playing their best game, we'll still lose a couple times because it's just, I mean, you just point to things.
Like, Nick Foles, I like him, but he's still Nick Foles. Like, he's still not – like, there's a reason why he's been on seven teams or whatever it is.
It is, but I'm okay with it. And he went to, like, several colleges because everyone wants him.
Yeah, I'm not going to apologize. I'm not going to apologize.
I'm going to enjoy it. I'm going to have everyone doubt us.
I know that deep down the Bears are destined for a 10-6, 11-5 record and then to lose in a heartbreaking way in the first round and then everyone to shit down my throat. I know that, but I don't care because I'm going to enjoy it until I have everyone's anus hovering over my mouth as I swallow America's shit.
It would be just a real shame if you guys finished 10-6, made the playoffs, and then Aaron Rodgers beat you. No, dude, they might not.
The Packers might not make the playoffs. Well, the Bears are in first place.
First place. Number one, first place.
Our loss was against the AFC. The Packers lost against the NFC.
The Bears are in first place. I will not apologize.
I fucking love this defense. I don't care if it's ugly.
We'll keep winning ugly.

Monday night football next week.

No way that will go bad.

Monday night against who?

The Rams who just lost.

No way that will go bad.

Nope.

No way.

Remember we did the most important player, best player thing to sound smart.

The Bears have a definitive best player on their defense, Cleo Mack,

most important player, Akeem Hicks.

He's a fucking beast.

So if you want to sound smart about the Bears, you say, yeah,

you know who really makes it cook?

Akeem Hicks.

You know what you can also say to sound smart?

Just because Alan Robinson doesn't light up the stat sheet every week.

He's incredible. You can say he's a really underrated blocker at wide receiver.

He's a great wide receiver.

He doesn't get enough credit.

And David Montgomery is not the problem, the offensive line is. But hopefully that gets fixed uh all right next up lions jaguars um are the jacks are just tanking the lions didn't blow a big lead the lines they maintained a big lead yes for the first time which which is more about the jaguars being just terrible um i think they're tanking now i don't know i don't know so uh doug marone after the game he had a really nice quote he said it's uh being oh and five is a big challenge but with big challenges come big rewards so he's already he's done a spin zone that's like it's always darkest before the dawn uh i think maybe he was just talking about getting paid like it's it's nice like the big reward is i get i cash a paycheck we every two weeks yeah even though we're oh and five and it's for a lot of money yes yeah that's that makes sense the um deandre swift looked good uh our friend world of isaac who's now becoming a regular on mentioning lions games did have a tweet that i very much liked because matt stafford does make throws like patrick mahomes and no one loses their mind about him because he's Matt Stafford, but he had a throw, like a sidearm underneath, like a submarine throw that was incredible, and it was like, this is an incredible throw.
If Mahomes did this, and I'm not blaming Mahomes. It's more the media.
They would all be losing their mind. But Matt Stafford, I'll forever say that he's a good quarterback stuck in a bad situation.
Hall of Fam hall of fame by the way one in five what's that they're one in five yeah they beat the call that's right yeah they've had five straight losses yes he's saying that that's when it it's uh it's darkest right now it's about to be dawn when i go to my mailbox and put that deposit into my bank it'll be nice it might be time for another cry fest for marone yeah i Yeah. I think he might need to start weeping again.
Yeah. I think he said that he's keeping all of his friends employed, which is nice.
He's not going to fire his defensive coordinator. That's huge.
He's like, as long as I'm the coach, he's going to be on the staff also collecting a check. Yep.
So say what you want about Doug and Marone. Keep the game together.
They're probably just going out for some spaghetti and meatballs on Tuesday nights. For the fellas.
Hey, we're getting paid. This is a classic kind of test case franchise when it comes to my theory of just like the kicking situation on any team is always going to tell you if it's a functional franchise.
Yeah, you talked about this a couple weeks ago. The new kicker that has never kicked before in an NFL game.
That had a kicker that had never kicked a field goal in a game. Preseason he did a couple years ago.
And then I looked him up. His name is John Brown.
And I got confused because it said, like, the little nugget that they put on Google when you search his name says that he's a U.K. soccer star.
So I was like, wait a second. Is this guy like a British soccer player? No, he played football at the University of Kentucky.
Same amount of World Cup titles in the last 50 years, but, like, very, very different ecosystems. Kentucky as opposed to Great Britain.
Yes. But he made a field goal.
He made a field goal. That was nice.
You always know that your franchise is in dire straits when the best thing that you can take out of the weekend is this guy that had never done his job before in an NFL game didn't completely screw everything up. It's a nice story.
It's a nice story. So Lions get their second win.
They're going to be one of those teams. They might be a good, bad team.
Yeah. They have the bones to look good on a given weekend, but be bad.
I think that they're a bad average team. Yeah.
They might be below average. I think they're a good below average team.
It depends if we're talking first or second half. So first half Lions are a great bad team.
But their resting heart rate is bad, but I think they have abilities to be good. That's just because teams take on the personality and physical parameters of their head coach.
Right. But the Vikings, the Vikings are, I think their wrestling heart rate should be good,

but they're bad.

You know what I mean?

Yeah.

They're underachieving, where the Lions, when they win, it's like,

oh, that's nice.

It's kind of overachieving a little bit.

I'd say the first half Lions are one of the best teams in the NFL.

If the Lions and Eagles could, like, figure out a way to just combine

their halves together, they'd play an entire game of good football.

The human centipede them. All right.
Jets, Dolphins. Dolphins 24, Jets 0.
I mean, there's only one story here. It's Adam Gase.
Adam Gase, there was this graphic that was shown on the TV that's shocking. Adam Gase, 2015 Bears OC oc 21st ranked offense 2016 miami head coach 24th ranked offense 2017 miami head coach 25th ranked offense 2018 miami head coach 31st ranked offense last year jets head coach lat 32nd ranked offense this year jets head coach 32nd ranked offense they've scored 75 points in six games six offensive touchdowns no one else has less than 100 it's inc i actually am going to zag on everyone and say like i i applaud adam gaze for getting this far in life yeah it's incredible what he has done.
And we've said it before. I will say it again.
It is a great lesson for everyone out there. Get yourself next to someone great and have everyone else think that you had something to do with it and you're set for life.
Adam Gase was the OC for the number one ranked offense and the number two ranked offense when Peyton Manning

was with the Broncos. And Peyton Manning was

essentially the offensive coordinator for the most teams too.

And he then... Adam Gase's job was to make

sure that Peyton Manning's hot tub was turned

on when he was like soaking his foot in it watching

practice. Yes, and then he has parlayed those

two years where he was just basically

around Peyton Manning

to five years

for and some change, because he'll probably

get fired this year, of being a head coach

in the NFL. It is, in your wildest dreams, you can't fail upwards like Adam Gase has failed.
And say what you want about him, but I was listening to you list off all those stats. He's very consistent.
Yeah, consistently awful. Yes, yes.
You know what you're going to get out of Adam Gase. There are no surprises.
12.5 points per game, and he's an offensive genius. I think it's possible that the Jets don't know whose job it is to fire Adam Gase, and that's the whole reason that he still has a job.
We also have the theory that at this point, I think Joe Douglas hates Adam Gase so much, the best way to stick it to him is make him keep coaching the Jets. Yeah.
And then, I mean, Woody Johnson is the owner of the team,

but how involved is he?

Like Douglas might be waiting for Woody to put a stamp of approval on it.

Yeah.

And he's not checking his email over in England.

Right.

And so like,

I think that,

I think there's a very real possibility that like everyone is thinking that

it's the other guy's job to make that decision to fire him.

And so that's why there's been no movement on it.

It's,

it's remarkable.

The Joe Flacco took a 28 yard sack.

I was about to say the play of the day was Joe Flacco took a sack

Thank you. make that decision to fire him.
And so that's why there's been no movement on it. It's remarkable.
Joe Flacco took a 28-yard sack. I was about to say the play of the day was Joe Flacco took a sack for minus 28 yards.
One shy of the record. I didn't think that Joe Flacco could cover that type of ground on one play.
That's amazing. Flacco, say what you want about him.
He's still got the wheels if he's able to retreat 28 yards before getting tackled. Joe Flacco is the king of taking the snap, running 10 yards backwards, and then throwing it 10 yards over the sideline.
Yes. That's his play.
Uh-huh. And no one's even close.
That and drawing a pass interference penalty. Which he can't really do anymore.
Because there's literally nobody at wide receiver. Right.
It's impossible. And he can't also get the ball close enough.
Well, his receivers are so bad that you can't – every ball is technically uncatchable yeah you're trotting out those guys did you see greg williams has tried to uh to take over so he oh yeah the question was asked like about your defense you're giving up all this and he said it's not all on the defense uh basically saying the offense is so bad which is true but you have to be a fucking moron to say that and then adam gaze apparently uh replied shut up and play yeah i need i absolutely need like a mid-season hard knocks on the jets do we know who's doing the amazon all or nothing right now no i hope it's the jayton gaze should fire greg williams right now that would be great well no i think adam gaze is hoping that he gets fired so that greg williams will have to coach the Yeah. He's like trying to pass that along.
He hates him. Yeah, right.
That makes sense. But yeah, Adam Gase, I'm sure he's probably going to get fired by the time this show comes out.
I don't know. I don't think Greg Williams is the kind of guy that would throw anybody that he works with under the bus.
Yeah. So I don't know if that was taken out of context where he said you'll have to figure that out when it comes to the offense.
But I'd like to see Greg Williams just roll out the bounty incentive program one more time. He should probably put a bounty on Adam Gase.
Yes, yes. Like run into him on the sidelines.
But the Jets defense is so poorly coached they wouldn't be able to do it. Right, they'd be offside.
Because they're coached by Greg Williams. I think the Jets are, at this point, they just got to be like, fuck it, Trevor Lawrence.
Yeah. Like, fuck it.
We're not going to win. You can look around the bad teams in the NFL.
Like, even the Washington football team, they win week one, and they've been in games. They're in the game this week.
The Vikings, the Falcons both have only one win, but they're in game. The Jaguars have every now and then sniffed around it.
The Jets aren't even close. This wasn't even close.
The Dolphins should have beaten them by more. The Dolphins didn't even play that well, but they're not even playing football anymore.
Right. It's a different sport.
They need to just get COVID and just go away. I was looking at the upcoming schedule because I have, in moments of honesty with myself, I've thought, hey, there's a possibility that the Washington football team could get Trevor Lawrence.

And it's just not going to happen.

The Jets are not going to win a game.

The Jets should be prevented from getting Trevor Lawrence.

Yeah.

The league should step in.

And Roger Goodell should say, for the good of this young man, we're not going to let you screw him up.

Although that would be Dan Snyder's final quest to conquer. I've ruined the development of so many quarterbacks.
Maybe I can screw up Trevor Lawrence. Maybe that might even be a bridge too far for me.
Yes. He loves a good challenge.
The Jets will probably finish with two or fewer wins if they get two. If they get two, it'll be a miracle.
It will be a miracle. They have that one game.

So when I saw they only have six touchdowns in six games, I was like, but didn't they play that shootout with the Broncos?

And they scored 28 points, but they only had one offensive touchdown.

Right.

They just kicked a shitload of field goals and had to pick six.

Yeah, they just abused Brett Rippon.

And the one offensive touchdown was Sam Darnold just happened to, like,

break free and kept on running.

He accidentally ran for, like, 54 yards.

Yeah, that wasn't a designed play by Adam Gase.

No, Adam Gase is doing, like, the producers on the sidelines,

and he's just livid that Sam Darnold figured out a way to scramble for a touchdown on a play that was designed for him to take a 12-yard sack. The only positive I would say is, well, this isn't really a positive if you're a Jets fan, but you'd have to assume that both Sam Donald and Joe Flacco will be good next year if they get away from Adam Gase.
That's true. Like the Ryan Tano.
That's the part that's crazy is that we just talked about all that with Adam Gase and we're not even mentioning because we kind of alluded to it earlier, but probably the fourth in voting for MVP this year year is because adam gaze was his coach and he sucked forever and then he got like he he went to the titans and became good like that guy was coached by adam gaze and he looked like he never played the position i'm actually starting to turn the corner on sam donald i i earlier this year i just thought okay he's he's not going to ever be the guy that they want him to be when when he was drafted now i'm starting to realize like just how bad adam gaze is that everything that he touches yeah i'm the same way i'm like maybe you know what i i'm starting to feel like uh a lot of people feel towards deshaun watson towards sam donald where it's like this guy has gotten absolutely boned by his coaching i'd like to see him i. I'm the same way.
I've been hard on Sam Darnold. It's more because like, you know, people loved him more than Josh Allen.
But I, I agree with you. I would like to see Sam Darnold in just whatever a step above the most fucked up situation is.
Just show me that with Sam Darnold. Like he doesn't even have to be in a functional organization right just a like semi-dysfunctional organization and he might be good he's like if you have a if you have a neighbor that just leaves their dog outside all the time and never goes out to like feed it or take care of that's what that's how i'm observing sam donald right now right and the jets just if he just had a doghouse so not even a doghouse.
Just give him a bowl. Or just like a plank of wood.
Yeah. Just like some particle board so when it rains, he doesn't have to stand out in the rain the entire time.
That's it. Just like catching fungus.
That's it. Just give him a two by four from Home Depot.
Yep. Let him make his own little nest underneath that occasionally.
I'll feel much better for him. Yes.
All right right last game before we get to dion uh the green bay packers 10 tampa bay 38 aaron rogers inappropriately disgustingly disgusting act disgusting act humped thrust in america's face for a touchdown that was called back is a simulated sex act was a simulated sex act. So two things happened at the same time.
Aaron Rodgers simulated sex in our eyes on a non-touchdown. On the Lord's Day.
On the Lord's Day. Simulated that sex.
And Colin Coward tweeted, if anyone sees a weakness with the Packers, just give me a heads up. I can't spot one.
And those two things happened at the same time. And then the Packers gave up 38 points, unanswered points and lost 38 to 10.
Yeah. Well, the kiss of death from Colin Coward.
I would like to think that Colin Coward hasn't lost his fastball that much where he will be able to like fire off some good takes about Aaron Rodgers doing the sex act, the old discount double dick. But I think that he's just – I think Colin Coward is in love with Aaron Rodgers.
Yeah. I think he's just – he loves everything that he does.
So I'm doubting Coward's ability to move forward because Aaron Rodgers, he typically wears his hats in the correct direction. So he's a little bit blinded when it comes to evaluating him on that one.
But it was – It was an ass-kicking. It was an ass-kicking.
And I think it's because Aaron Rodgers has been too happy recently. Too happy.
And all right, so I'm sure I'll get some blowback for this, but I'm going to say it. This is the same issue the Packers had last year.
They step up in class. They step up against a physical team.
And they don't look like the same team that started the season 5-0 or whatever they were. They have beaten the Vikings, the Lions, the Falcons, and the Saints.
The Saints was a good win on the road, Sunday Night Football, but the Bucs played physical. They blitzed.
They fucking played great defense. Aaron Rodgers looked lost.
I'm going to say the f-word just yet because i don't want to piss off aaron rogers more than already you know the world already has this year but if you're looking at last year and this year when they play a physical team it looks a little different i think we should just actually want to compliment aaron rogers more we want to keep him happy right yeah so keep him happy Aaron I thought that was I thought I thought it was hilarious how you did that little uh double pump from the sketch comedy show that came out 10 years ago I thought yeah and also uh it was originally done by Lance Moore back in 2013 in a game and you almost very funny and timely how you did that and you almost you you got like halfway to the uh cervical or whatever. Yeah.
Yeah, you were almost there. Almost, yeah.
Nice little thrust. You totally had a lot of sex, dude, if that's the way you thrust.
You totally touched the G spot on that one. Yeah, you for sure got there.
She squirted. She definitely wouldn't say, is it in yet? She squirted, Aaron.
Yeah. You did a great, wonderful job.
Also, I thought it was cool how the Packers didn't put Jordan Love in the game when they went to their quarterback.

Very nice.

That was super nice of them.

I didn't because I had an all-time gambling meltdown when I needed a half a point.

But credit to me, I bounced back.

Yeah.

I bounced back.

If Skip Bayless doesn't believe in God, he should now because he hates Aaron Rodgers.

Yep.

And the guy that is threatening to take Aaron Rodgers' job is literally named Jordan Love. This is a wet dream concocted inside his little weird brain.
I saw at the end of the game he tweeted out, Brady greater than, greater than, greater than, greater than, greater than, greater than Aaron Rodgers at the end of it. Put his little stamp on it.
The Packers are going to, by the way, this is why it sucks to even throw out the thought, the hint, the whiff of the F word with the Packers.

Because they're playing the Texans and the Vikings next.

Aaron Rodgers is going to have, like, 15 touchdowns against those two teams.

This is going to be, he's going to fucking torch those teams.

We got a nice little treat to cap off our Sunday.

Something that nobody expected.

But at the end of this game, we got Blaine Gabbert.

We got Blaine Gabbert.

Blaine train.

He made his triumphant return.

The Blaine train.

Thank you. to cap off for Sunday, something that nobody expected.
But at the end of this game, we got Blaine Gabbert. We got Blaine Gabbert.
Blaine train. He made his triumphant return.
The Blaine train. The human victory cigar, or the human victory spliff.
Blaine Gabbert came in, and I think he just handed the ball off a couple times. Also, shout out Gronk.
He's back. Yeah.
He looked good. He looked young.
We also had the Troy Aikman talking about Ryan Jensen's butt sweat for like 10 minutes. There's a 10-minute diatribe on buttholes.
Because they just ran out of shit to talk about. Different type of towels that get shoved up there.
Yeah. Gronk's spike needs a little work.
He hasn't done it in like two years. It's been since his last touchdown.
You know who's spike was really surprisingly good today was Joe Burrows. Yes.
Joe Burrows is a very good spiker of the ball. Yes.
So do you think the Packers are cursed by the Aaron Rodgers pump? By the sex act? The little baby pump? I don't want to say cursed just yet. I'd say that they're having a haunting.
There's an apparition. Apparition.
What's the word? Apparition. There's a ghost that appears.
He also said that Rodgers said afterwards the loss may be good for the Packers. Fuck that.
Of course it is. Of course they're going to fucking rip off a bunch of wins.
Their schedule stinks. Their schedule.
They play no one except the Bears. They play no one.
They have to play the Bears twice, though. They play no one.
The Packers are going to be like 13-3 again, and everyone's going to be like, you call them frauds, and then we'll just wait. We'll wait.
Play a physical team? We'll wait. We'll wait.
Play some man football, and then you're fucking tossing it around and smiling and discount double-checking? We'll wait. Tom Brady looked like he had all his mental abilities today.
Yep. He recovered from dementia from last week.
He had a long. He drank a lot of water.
Got a nice massage. Just because it's earlier in the day.
He wasn't sundowning yet. If you play him after dark, he gets confused and forgets where he is.
And credit to the Bucs defense for losing Vito Vey and being awesome. Levante David was sick.
You know what I really enjoyed about today's game? It was the rare appearance of Aaron rogers trying to make tackles yeah you never get that yeah he's only thrown three pick sixes in his career which is crazy and so he got he actually kind of stopped to pick six he almost had two pick sixes today yep uh but he he got just absolutely ran over by somebody but in the process of getting run over kind of like clogged up the lane a little bit and the guy got tackled but seeing a Rodgers get blocked or try to make a tackle it's uh it's completely unnatural act but it's fun to watch good times okay let's get to uh Dion before we do that a quick word from our friends at ever had one of those days when it's just too cold to keep working nah neither has Ariat Ariat work jackets and boots are packed with all the cold stopping waterproof protection you need to get the job done under any conditions so you can take any job out there and always deliver. Check out Ariat in your local workwear retailer or visit Ariat.com slash work to get 10% off your first order when you sign up for email and weather whatever in Ariat work gear.
Okay, here he is Deion Sanders all right our good friend co-worker coach prime he is on with us 10 15 minutes every Sunday talking about the biggest news from the NFL let's start with the game we just watched the Green Bay Packers got absolutely smoked by Tom Brady and the Bucs uh what's your biggest takeaway other than after Aaron Rodgers did that disgusting act of humping in everyone's face, the Packers scored zero points and it was a 38-0 run from that point forward. It was so funny because when he was doing that, all I could see is Dave right next to me saying, yeah, when he's playing somebody that he could beat down, he has this arrogance about him.
I just heard him just blasting in my ear saying that. And then after the two picks, he never recovered.
Yeah, it was bad. Never recovered.
It was bad. And the Bucs, credit to the Bucs because they're missing Vita Vey, who's out for, I think, the rest of the season, and their defense looked awesome even without him.
Where was this Bucs defense a week ago? Yeah. Like, where were they? And Gronk has finally risen.
Right. He looks like old Gronk.
I'm happy that Gronk is alive. I didn't know if he was alive.
I didn't know if he was – I don't know what he was doing these last several weeks, but Gronk is alive. Yeah, I think he looks like he's back up to what his old playing weight was.
Maybe it was the uniforms they were wearing today because they had those powder pewter pants or whatever they are. Gronk looked like big old Gronk.
He looked happy. His spikes sucked, though.
Did you see his spike? Yeah, he hadn't been in the end zone what in what two years yeah he took a toll on he's out of practice with that for sure yes um so is aaron rogers washed up oh of course not aaron rogers is still the man that was a good question man that was a really good question can you just say that he's washed up so we can put out a quote saying that you said that aaron rogers washed up and we get a shit load of Aaron Rodgers is the man still oh brutal what about uh the Cleveland Browns not being able so it's 17 years now 17 years they haven't won in Pittsburgh uh in terms of like the psyche of a team that's rolling they're four and one they're feeling good they go into Pittsburgh they get absolutely demolished Baker was hurt he was playing hurt what happened oh no don't do that Don't do it. No-1.
They're feeling good. They go into Pittsburgh.
They get absolutely demolished. Baker was hurt.
He was

playing hurt. What happens...

No, don't do that. Don't do that.
No, I'm gonna do

that. His ribs.
Don't do that.

His ribs. Don't do that.
His ribs.

Don't do that. What happens to the

psyche of a team, though, after having

a loss like that,

a promising start, and then a loss like that

where they step up in class to the

big boy division and they get absolutely killed. They're JV.
You know that. We know that.
Everyone knows that. They know that.
They're JV. They're not varsity yet.
And you know, don't give Baker that out. Don't do that.
I don't think Baker would respect you if you give him that out. And I want him to him to respect you.
Well, so what does he have to do to get up to varsity?

Yeah.

What do the Browns have to do?

No, no, not Baker, the whole team.

That's not just on Baker.

The whole team, they're not on that level yet, man.

They got a ways to go.

They're not on that level.

I just think about how happy the Browns fans were,

and it is demoralizing to have that big test and fail it.

Like, even if you lose close, you can say, well, we're right there. But that game was never even close.
No, from the corn toss. Yeah.
They probably lost that. I didn't even watch that.
They probably lost the corn toss too. Yeah, that's true.
That is true. What about what's going on in New England? Are you concerned at all? If you're Hank Lockwood, our producer, and you are a diehard, unbiased New England Patriots fan, are you pushing

the panic button? No,

because that's just time away from the

game. That's just

COVID-type stuff.

What we saw today

was a tribute to COVID.

Those

guys are regimented guys.

New England is like an

army-type team. They got to be here, do this, do that, do that.
And when it messes up their schedule and their routine, they don't respond well. Don't do that.
Don't do that. Bill Belichick would not appreciate that.
He wouldn't respect you as a man if you did that. And I want him to respect you.
Don't do that. See how that sounded? Because I know Belichick's not using an excuse for that game.
Absolutely not. He's not, but that's what it is.
Sometimes you just have those games. Denver? Like, Denver? Are you serious? That's why I'm saying this is that type of game, because Denver, this was Denver that went in there and did that.
And they didn't even score a touchdown. That's the craziest part.
They didn't have a very good game. I don't think – just pull Cam out of that MVP conversation that you guys had.
That's a wrap. It's actually interesting because we had two of those happen today.
I mean, Cam was more of a fringe MVP guy. But Rodgers, like that, that's going to be tough to win the MVP with a game like that that where he doesn't throw a touchdown he has two picks and like 150 yards or whatever it was like that definitely feels like with russell wilson mahomes maybe josh allen he's throwing there lamar the defending uh mvp having a game like that hurts yeah i'm so proud of you yes i'm so proud of you by Lamar, I'm so proud of you.
I really am. It's going to be tough for Rodgers to come back in the MVP race for that.
Now, are you ready to respect the Chicago Bears that are now first place in the NFC North, 5-1? No respect. They're underdogs every single week.
I saw their underdogs next week, Monday Night Football against the Rams. What do they have to do to get respect? Consistency offensively.
Defensively, we know what they bring to the table. But everybody's just waiting on Foles, his slipper, to come off.
You know I'm a Foles guy. I love me some Nick Foles.
That's why I can't stand Philly because they wouldn't have won anything without Foles and it's showing they're not gonna win anything without foes but I love Nick Foles I just want him to prove to the world that he could be a consistent starter that's what their way known consistency now if he can prove that would you put the Bears are they are they in your uh pretender pile or contender pile because I I'm fully on board with the Bears. No, and I'm going to tell you why you're wrong.
Because the Bears, they win the weird games that everyone expects them to lose, but they do it enough where that's just their pattern. You are what your pattern is.
The Bears are a weird, kind of bad football team that's actually really, really good. I wouldn't say bad.
How are you going to ask for my opinion? Then tell me no. I'm letting you know.
Because the Bears are going to be 15-1, and they're going to win every game by one point, and you're still going to be sitting there being like, they stink. And at some point, you have to say, you are who your record says you are.
Stop that. Five-1.
You are who your record says you are. You got to let him fly this kite.
You can't ask me something that didn't jump me when I give you an answer. That's what I do.
Well, your answer sucks. You can't ambush me.
Your answer sucks. I wanted to help you find a new way of saying that.
You know what I'm going to get? I'm going to get me a junk talker and a cusser just for y'all when I come on the air. And I'm going to point to him and he's going to do all my dirty work.
You know what? I think KFC is the guy. Okay.
Okay. All right.
He can do that for you. Yes, he can do that for you.
He's my guy. I had one last question.
This is you went against your own advice. The Falcons, they have the Dan Quinn firing, and then you get the bump that you talked about, which I thought was an unbelievable point after a team loot you know fires their head coach guys in the locker room are looking around and saying how like what do we do here we're we're playing for our job we're probably not gonna be here next year because we're not the guy's guy and then you went against it does the bump last because they've hurt me yeah does a bump last though for more than one game? Can the Falcons kind of get a little run

going? It's like making love.

Once you get it, you're sleepy

now. Now they're sleepy.
But you need that

second nut, though, like if you have

the refractory period. You know what I'm

talking about. Yeah.
I knew

you were going to take that bait. I knew you were

going to jump down. It happens.

It's not like, and afterwards you feel like you're

pretty much dead and you have nothing to give the world, but

no, I understand what you're saying.

They had like a little bit of a bounce back,

Thank you. It happens.
It's not like afterwards you feel like you're pretty much dead and you have nothing to give the world. But, no, I understand what you're saying.
They had, like, a little bit of a bounce back. But if you're like the Dolphins right now, or excuse me, if you're the Jets right now, Adam Gase is pretty much like a dead man, right? Like, there's no way that the locker room is following him.
No, no, no. It's not just him.
The quarterbacks, too. Like, the quarterbacks,

plural, and the head coach,

they're connected. They're the only two that's going to have a record.
You might as well get

ready for the

Clemson sweepstakes.

You know, that's where they're going.

First pick, Trevor, I'm sorry.

Trevor Lawrence, thank you for recanting that.

Trevor Lawrence sweepstakes. That's what they're on

right now. This is pathetic.

But I've always thought

now it's hard

I'm not going, now it's hard to tank in the NFL because it's hard to get up. It's a physical sport.
But you think that they can – They're not trying to tank. They just suck.
They don't have to try to tank. They just got to do what they've been doing.
That's why they're not firing Adam Gase. Because he's found the magic where he's not trying to tank, but he's doing a really good job of tanking anyways.
So if they fire him, they might get better and then miss out on Trevor Lawrence. But let me tell you something that's going to happen.
I feel like Trevor Lawrence is going to pull an Elway and an Eli and say, I'm not doing that. Where do you think Trevor Lawrence wants to play? That's what I'm saying.
It's not New York. I can't see that.
I can't. Washington? I just can't see it.
It's something wrong with the organization. You can't have – it's not too many – that's too many consecutive quarterbacks in the in a system that's bad that's just bad they hadn't really won what since rex right yeah and that was based on the defense that was based on all defense rex wasn't even uh his his final tally as head coach of the jets was even below 500 it's been like i think 25 30 years since they've had a coach that finished above 500 right and you think that kid want to go there with all he's accustomed to winning winning and more winning ain't no way in the world he's gonna pull it eli i like this i like deon from a perspective of like a player inside a locker room what does it look like what's the difference between you always hear about like good organizations with good culture and then you know trash organizations that that can't get their culture together.
What is the actual difference as a player on a day-to-day basis between playing for a good organization that has their shit together and one that doesn't? The commitment. The commitment and the expectation.
It's sort of like when I was in Atlanta, I loved the Smiths, the Rankin Smith, Taylor Smith, all those guys those guys they were good guys but then when I go to San Francisco paying for Eddie DeBarno and Carmen Policy it's a total different expectation in the locker room a total different feeling amongst the team in the front office there's a whole different expectation there's a different commitment to excellence, just totally and you wouldn't want unless you're in it like the the front office from Atlanta had no idea who they are or who they were unless you go and really spend time with somewhere like the San Francisco 49ers of that era in that decade is unbelievable it's total difference I mean mean, I definitely agree with what you're saying

because I've heard, and you look around the NFL,

a lot of people will say, like, the NFL is a bunch of franchises

that there are a handful of franchises that are consistently trying

to win the Super Bowl and everyone else.

Like, that's it.

Everyone else is just trying to make a little money.

Right, exactly.

Make a little money and maybe sneak in the playoffs every now and then.

And then you have like five or six franchises.

Like this is our commitment to try to win the Super Bowl every single year.

You are accurate, my brother.

That's why I love you sometimes.

There we go.

Sometimes, sometimes.

You just got to start respecting the Bears a little bit more

because they're five and one and we're not apologizing.

I love me some Nick Foles.

Not the other Nick that y'all talk about, but I love Nick Foles. Yeah, you love him.
Yeah, there's a lot to love. There's a lot to love.
A lot to love. Alright, Dion.
Coach Prime. I got the guy's name wrong today.
Give me the name again. Trevor Lawrence? No, no.
Dion called Glenny Balls Lenny Balls. Not Glenny Balls, the other guy that I was introduced to.
Oh, Tongestown Bob. Yeah, you're dipping into the bar.
I thought it was Tongestown. It's Tongestown.
Well, Tongestown works too. Youngstown, Ohio.
Yeah, Tongestown. Deion's quickly finding out we're not the NFL Network.
Yeah, yeah. Tongestown Bob is a totally different guy with a different guy.
Yeah, that's a different guy altogether. All right, Dion.
You guys are unbelievable, man. All right.
See you, man. Thank you.
All right, buddy. See you.
Okay, let's wrap up the show with our Football Guy of the Week and who's back of the week. So Football Guy of the Week presented by Philips Norelco.
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Find all one bars at a retailer near you or on amazon.com all right philip sarelko one blade football guy of the week jake cub so we have thanks for dressing up jake is that a diss yeah no it's just i don't know i don't know why you're sitting in billy's seat so like it's reflexive. Reflexive? I'm just going to have to roast you.

Yeah.

Yeah, reflexive. It just feels natural to make fun of you.

If you were sitting one over, I wouldn't have said a word,

but because you're in Billy's seat, it's like I just want to bust you.

You need a punching bag.

Talk to him.

Right, Billy's our guy.

Right.

Yeah.

So you're just going to have to be it right now.

Thanks for dressing up, Jake.

I like those pants, actually.

Yeah, they're actually really nice.

Do they come in your size?

Roasted.

Got them. Roasted.
Have some. Suck it, Billy.
Billy football. What did I do to deserve it? You're sitting in Billy's seat.
It's very simple. You sat there.
Yeah. Okay, Jake.
We only have four spots, but we have five nominees. You guys are going to have to help me.
Oh, we're going to whittle it down. Yeah.
Okay. All right, let's do it.
First up, Dolphins quarterback Tua Tungabailoa. He went back to the field and sat around the 15-yard line in full uniform to FaceTime his parents and soak in the moment after making his NFL debut.
I love it. Two for two, 10 yards.
Very nice, but still, his hip did not fall off during the game, which is what we're all hoping. Yes.
I like that, though. I like just becoming one with the field.
It's very Les Miles-ish. Just soak in that moment.
Just soaking with it. He should have gone dick down onto the field.
This is actually the other side of the football player retiring that refuses to take off their pads for an hour in the locker room. This is the beginning of the career, which we hope is a long, illustrious career in the NFL.
Friend of the program, Titans head coach Mike Vrabel. This is from Tuesday, so he locked in a spot earlier in the week.
Gave everybody in the organization ball after tennessee's win over buffalo following the team's covet outbreak i like that yep just spreading all the germs everywhere love it rams running back running backs coach thomas brown after rupturing his achilles during practice thursday he according to sean mcveigh walked right off didn't flinch and won't miss a beat okay I like that too. I would like to see him get a scooter on the sidelines though.

A scooter or like some sort of homemade booger mobile that he can use

to just like teleport back and forth.

You don't have the Northwestern coach on there, do you?

I do not.

Okay, because this also happened to Northwestern coach.

I think it was maybe a wide receivers coach.

It looked like he tore his groin in practice, and they had the clip,

and he was just doing all the drills.

And everyone kept on saying like, Coach, are you okay? He's like okay he's like yep fine fine as he's hop skipping around the field uh trying to play through the pain i also like the idea of the coach now using the training facility like getting the same treatment done at the same time as the players yeah like he's doing his rehab and you know he's pissed because he's like can't make the club in the tub yeah next up we have a random west virginia fan who customized jersey named FU COVID with a number 19 and more to Saturday's game versus Kansas. I love it.
This is what we need. We need to shame the virus itself more.
Go at it. Yeah.
You know what? It's like being in training camp for a while. We're sick of hitting each other, getting into arguments about spreading the disease.
We need to actually just go at the common enemy, which is just roast the virus. We should fight COVID.
Imagine if COVID, we should just get, yeah, like be a man COVID, fight us. I want to hang out next to somebody that has COVID and just punch the droplets coming out of their mouth.
And then finally, we have Kentucky head coach Mark Stoops. Water boredom with hydrochloroxicin.
Bleach. Bleach, yeah, bleach.
Bleach their ass. Mark Stoops after his team.
Not bleach their ass. That's porn.
Right. But bleach their ass.
After his team's win at Tennessee, showed his excitement. Do you watch porn, Jake? No.
Okay. Of course not.
Wait. Jake, say two his last name again.
Tunga Bailoa. You've practiced that.
Very much so. You've practiced it.
Many times. I looked it up right before to confirm the pronunciation.
We're not going to have another Hilaire incident. Clyde Edwards-E-Lair.
There we go. Okay, perfect.
Finally, we have Kentucky head coach Mark Stoops. After his team's win at Tennessee, he showed his excitement by saying, quote, we haven't won here and I am tired of that in the locker room.
So he didn't swear. Oh, he did.
Oh, he did. Yeah.

What did he say?

What words did he say?

I can spell it out,

but I feel like it's a different... I think as a journalist,

you need to...

It's like a mad lib.

I have no idea what he said.

You need to accurately portray

what was said.

Jake, you know what you're doing?

Jake, you're making the story

about yourself now

by not saying the words.

If it was written,

print journalists,

they put it in quotes,

and that's okay. So put it in quotes.
Air quotes. No, speaking is different.
Speaking quotes. What if you just say quote? Was it a slur? Yeah, it sounds like it was a slur.
How would we know? Funny stuff. F-U-C-K-I-N-G-S-H-I-T.
Got it. And I think it was leaked because one of his players was on IG Live, so I don't know if this is supposed to get out there, but Matt Jones tweeted it.
Okay. So who do you want to kick out? Well, Mark Soup should be in there anyway because I think I saw a tweet that they stopped on the way to Tennessee to hold a practice.
So he's in there. I think he's got a natural clock like most football guys do.
If they spend longer than four hours without a whistle around their neck being blown, it just feels unnatural. They have to reset that clock.
I feel like tonguey. I'd vote tonguey.
No, I think we should vote the guy who got hurt because he doesn't want us to draw attention to it. The Rams.
We're drawing attention to his injury. Either that or Vrabel because Vrabel was last week.
Also, if they're not going to take the virus seriously, then we should not take them seriously. True.
As Doug Farrar pointed out. So thanks for coming out, Vrabes.
No, we can't do that to Vrabes. Let's do the Rams.
The Rams. The Rams.
The Rams. Yeah, because I think that he would be upset that we even talked about him being hurt.
Yeah. Because he's not.
Well, no, he's hurt. He's not injured.
Yes. Right.
So we'll kick him out. Thomas Brown.
Sorry. Everyone vote for it.

Football.

Hey, what's going on there, pal?

We saw you at the hockey game on.

Do I know you guys?

I'm Ryan Whitney.

I got a drink named after me.

Not a big deal.

Pink Whitney?

That's what I thought.

See you, fellas.

I invented the thing, you pigeon.

Pink Whitney for legendary moments.

Let's finish up.

We got who's back of the week.

Henry. Daniel.
Go ahead. Scalboy.
moments let's finish up we got who's back of the week henry daniel go ahead scale boy uh i have a

few who's back to the week my first one is will smith oh which one exactly both of them yep but

not the one that we think no yes there's two will smiths back neither of them are the ones that's

what i said yeah right well i i know which ones to think because i was watching that game

Thank you. No.
Yes. There's two Will Smiths back.
Neither of them are the ones that you think. That's what I said.
Yeah, right. Well, I know which ones to think because I was watching that game.
So in the – what was it? The Braves-Dodgers. Yeah.
Will Smith, the pitcher on the Dodgers, versus Will Smith, the batter on the Braves. Will Smith versus Will Smith.
Took him Yabo. Took him Yabo.
Took him Yabo. Yeah, and Tim Kirchner, I tweeted at the time, but I'm pretty sure Tim Kirchner just ejaculated everywhere because that is such a fun, quirky baseball moment.
Yes, that's the ultimate baseball moment. My other who's back of the week is the Pope.
The Pope. Okay, good.
The Pope. The P guy.
Big P. Big P.
Although I think this might have been like a- What's the Pope's name? Big Cat. The Pope.
John. No, but what what is...
Is it John? They're all John. They're all named John.
Yeah, they're all John. Oh, yeah, that's right.
But what was his name before that? Jesus. Pre-Pope.
Yeah. His name...
Franz. Can you imagine if you grew up with the Pope as your buddy when you were teenagers and the Pope was running around smoking cigarettes with you? The Pope.
Benedict. No.
Francesa. Yeah, Mike Francesa.
Pope Francis is actually his name. No.
Yeah, Pope Francis. It's Pope Francis.
Alright, there we go. His name's not John.
We just learned a lot about religion that we didn't know. Pope Francis.
Why is the Pope back? Pope memes are hot in the street. This might be a Stay Woke, Big Cath, just trying to get...
Oh, Big Cath trying to get into the youth of America. Barstool Big Cath.
They should put out... They should invent a Twitter handle.
We should do that. And just Pope memes? TikToks? Yeah, all his gambling losses.
TikToks of praying? Uh-huh. Yeah.
But yeah, it was one of those classic internet things. He tweets out a six pack of of communion wafers every Saturday morning.
Saturdays are for the wafers. It was funny, you know, the first few and then every single...
Saturdays is for the boys would also probably work in the council. Don't.
Every single account that's ever existed had to make their own Pope jokes and Pope memes and it killed it within like 24 hours. Yes.
It was very quick. Confession, I thoughtuliani when i first saw it yeah nice um no rudy giuliani actually looks like a dead person yes walking like if you if you were like what would a dead person who's still alive look like that would be rudy giuliani um all right pft i wonder what the god save the uh the makeup artist who has to sit down and help out rudy every time he goes on tv i thought saying.
Well, I think it's just Rudy that does it to himself. Yeah, probably.
He just headbutts a patch of foundation. Powdered donut.
Yeah. Like, yeah, we're good to go.
My Who's Back of the Week is Nick Saban. Nick Saban's back, battled bravely back from COVID in less than a week, I think.
So there's some speculation whether or not it was a false positive test.

But the rule was like you have to have three negative tests come back within a 24-hour time span or something like that if you want to be allowed to coach again. And then I'm pretty sure they just gave him a test every five minutes.
Yes. They were just like testing him nonstop.
He was just spitting constantly in a bottle. Yes.
They just had like a beaker that was in front of him at all times my favorite uh moment from nick saban getting back on the field was all the journalists being like this sends a bad message that nick saban is bigger than college football it's like we're just finding that out yeah it wasn't the like 10 million dollar a year contract nick saban is big okay yeah you're right i god like we can't have that we can't have people think nick saban is bigger than college football even though he's literally been bigger than college football for the last decade nick saban is bigger than the pope in the south he is the most powerful man he's probably like the third most powerful man in america i'd say the most powerful in the sec states yes all of them yes so yeah damn it. We finally found out that Nick Saban is more powerful than the college football.
We're definitely going to get some Paul Feinbaum callers talking shit about Corona, too. Yeah.
I would love to see the conversation, like Mark Emmert trying to have Nick Saban not coach. Just being like, can you please? And Nick Saban just shut...
Probably just hangs up on him. He'd just be like, fuck you you and this is yeah so saban talk to my talk to my assistant saban probably like figured out the process for how he was going to defeat this virus very early on he had the game plan for it and this is like the ultimate boss for nick saban yeah he's gonna he's gonna weep because there are no stronger enemies left to vanquish after he's already crushed a uh a contagious disease like uh clemson clemson yeah abo's got his number that was such a coach oh there's very very few times in like the Saban Alabama run where you can get Alabama like under a touchdown and everyone being like I don't know about Bama this year and you're like okay I kind of do because they're always fucking good.
And they're not like peak Bama.

But Mac Jones is good.

Really good.

And Jalen Waddell is electric.

Yeah.

We were talking about it last week.

They had Henry Ruggs and Jerry Judy and Jalen Waddell is better than both of them.

Yes.

They've got awesome receivers.

I still think Mechie is going to be as good, if not better, than Waddell.

They're fucking sick.

They're sick.

All right.

My who's back of the week is JFK Jr. He's back, or was supposed to be back.
Didn't show up. He was going to show up and arrest some people, right? He was trending on Saturday, and I clicked it, and I was like, what's going on here? Apparently, there was a theory online that JFK Jr.
has never died and was coming back to announce that he was President Trump's running mate. Oh, shit.
Yeah. I mean, that would be...
I love that, like, these theories, in all these theories, it has Mike Pence being a cuck. Right.
It's like, what happens to Pence? Right. So JFK Jr., he was going to, like, where has he been? Has he been to, like, slow-pongers? Probably, like, I don't know, what's the...
Just flying around the world? Chappaquita? Yeah, Chappaquita. Just like practicing water landings? Yes.
He's just been hanging out there. Him and Harrison Ford have been going on like a coast to coast, just one constant like flight back and forth, getting their pilot license.
Yeah. Getting instrument rated finally.
He's been hanging with Amelia Earhart. Yeah.
Wherever she is. Okay, but he didn't show up.
No, he didn't. But he was back for a minute.
He was trending, which is kind of cool to trend from the grave yeah i mean and not be canceled i think it's one of all of our goals to like at some point go viral on a platform that did not exist at the time of her death and but like especially not can't because like people trend from the grave but they're usually being canceled right from the grave this one was like hey dude he like it's saturday october 17th i mean jfk jr's about to show up how incredible would it be if that was true though just once i want one person to be dead forever and show up what happened like jfk jr originally he well he died he flew his plane into uh the long island sound he died i didn't know that yeah he died right um all right well maybe not so it so he might be alive. But I just once like tupac like just what elvis once just one of these guys just show up and be like guess what amelia erhart like hey steve jobs still here yeah steve jobs just give me one give me not hitler no no any of the others give me him i mean there is like a whole underground conspiracy theory that he is alive in south amer.
Right. Exactly.
Recently. Steve Jobs.
Yeah, both. Yeah.
I was saying H man. No, no.
Definitely not the H everyone else. Give me one of these cool stories where a guy just shows up and is like, hey, I'm here.
You know what they need to do? Tim Apple needs to add his next like press conference exhibition thing where he unveils the exact same iPhone again. He needs to just in a turtleneck.
Yeah. He just needs to come out most important part with something so extremely shitty that Steve Jobs can't bite his tongue anymore.
It was like, this guy's ruining my company. Yeah, I'm back.
I'm back, baby. All right, Jake, you're up.
Uh, Dickie V. Yes.
Yeah. College basketball may be in the off season, but his raise celebrations in front of his TV and his personalized raised Jersey or electric.
Yeah. It's great to see.
I need to see him jumping back into his hot tub wearing the polo shirt again. Yeah.
It's just the voice. That's the best celebration.
I really wanted the Astros just to crash the party and just. No.
No. What? Jake's a purist.
I hate them. The Rays are like anti-purist baseball.
They play that whole thing on a spreadsheet. Yeah.

They're fucking nerds.

Wait, Jake.

You just said the A word.

A?

Yeah, the Houston asterisk. Oh, asterisk.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Ass.

He said ass.

Ass and titties.

Which one are you?

Knew we could get you to cuss.

Got me.

Ass and titties.

Also, there's all these clips that are coming up.

Of course, I've cursed before, but after the Brenneman thing, I've... Oh, that was the line in the sand, like, I will never curse again? No, it's just, it makes it like...
You'll never say the hard F-bomb again? You've got to really limit myself. It was funny because Jake was actually concerned about that.
He's like, that really opened my eyes. Like, it can all be gone in a second if you say something like that.
Like, Jake spends his free time, like, dropping hard Fs,

just, like, strutting around the office,

using homophobic slurs.

I really need to cut that out of my vocabulary.

And the best part about all of this is that, like,

if Jake swore on camera,

this is the only job you can't get fired for,

but it would be the worst thing for Jake

because he'd be like,

I'd be stuck with these guys for the rest of my life. Yes.
Muscle yes it's very easy muscle memory it's a lot easier to not start a habit than it is to quit it jake yeah jake is not afraid of getting fired from the job he has he's afraid of only having this job yes yes pre-fired from the job that he wants he's like could you imagine anything worse yeah so i apologize I apologize retroactively for those clips. Apology not accepted.
Until you swear now. There's a drive to deep left.
Do you have a fact for us, Jake? Animal fact? This is the part where you wrote that was a great Billy impression. Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh.
There's a lizard in South America that lives on Hitler's property. How about this one? Duck-billed platypuses are the only mammals that lay eggs.
That is good. That's really good.
That's crazy. That is crazy.
You should have seen me after some chili. All right.
Let's do numbers. 29.
And then, by the way, Wednesday, the best interview we've done this year. Yeah.
With the coolest guy we've ever had on. I saw some people that accurately predicted it.
Yep, a couple people. A couple people had it correct.
But you'll be very happy because it was an awesome, awesome interview. We don't hype interviews ever since J.J jj watt hype it's um but this one's hype worthy it's as awesome as it could be like via zoom correct but it was still very very good yes uh all right numbers who's who wants to guess give me eight ocho ocho ocho i'm gonna go with 81 what would billy pick it's something 69 yeah 81 is my number 81

88888 What would Billy pick? Something stupid. Oh, 69.
Yeah. 81 is my number.
81. 8, 8, 8, 8, 8.
8, 8, 8. Lucky 8.
8, 8, 8. 79? Damn it.
I feel like we need to shuffle it, like, hand shuffle it next time. Because the numbers at the bottom have no shot.
Yeah, you're right. The single digits are all down at the bottom.
All right, well, we'll hand shuffle next time

for Wednesday's show, for our great interview.

Good luck.

Godspeed, everybody.

Try to get through our first Tuesday night

with no football and what seems like forever.

I don't know what I'm going to do on Tuesday.

Well, double Monday.

It's true.

Yeah.

See ya.

Love you guys. I don't know what to say.

I'd say it anyway.

Today is my day to follow you.

I'm coming for your love.

I'm coming for your love.

I'm coming for your love.

Come on. Take on me.
I'm coming for your love. Thank you.
We'll be right back. Thank you.
I'll be behind you

I'll be right back. It's Pardon My Take presented by Barstool Sports.