The Last Dance Finale, Karl Malone, And Mt Rushmore Of Grit Week Moments

Speaker 1 Hey, pardon my take, listeners. You can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube.
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Speaker 1 On today's part of my take, we have the last,

Speaker 1 last dance episodes 9 and 10. Review.
We also have special guest Carl Malone on the show. Tried to ask him a lot about the last dance.

Speaker 1 He really wants to talk about what he wants to talk about, but interesting interview. He had his shirt off the entire time.
He was sitting in his hunting

Speaker 1 trophy room. I don't even know what it was, but it was kind of a wild one.
We also have Billy Football breaking down the history of the Tampa 2, the cover 2 defense.

Speaker 1 We have who's back of the week and a very special Mount Rushmore

Speaker 1 of Grit Week moments because today would be the start of Grit Week if the world was anywhere normal. But it's not, so instead we'll go down memory lane, throw in a couple clips of it.

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Speaker 1 Okay, let's go.

Speaker 1 No place to hang out on washing.

Speaker 1 And then I can't blame all of the sun.

Speaker 1 Oh no, we're gonna ride down to Elay, Trick Avenue.

Speaker 1 And then we'll take

Speaker 1 Welcome to part of my take presented by the Cash App. Go download it right now.
Use code BarStool. You get $10 for free, $10 to the ASPCA.
Today is Monday, May 18th.

Speaker 1 And the last, last dance has aired, and everything makes sense now, PFT.

Speaker 1 We obviously are going to go through episodes 9 and 10, but at the absolute last, last part of the last dance, it talks about how, you know, MJ retires, Pippin gets traded, everyone going away, you know, Phil Jackson leaves, and then it goes with, and the Bulls started their rebuild.

Speaker 1 And it dawned on me watching that last 10 minutes, I think the reason why the Bulls have been doomed ever since is because the Bulls are actually on Michael Jordan's list now, too.

Speaker 1 If you watch that last moment when he has the iPad, like finding out why Reinsdorf said they should break up the team, I think he is now, I think the Bulls are the top.

Speaker 1 It goes Bulls and then Isaiah Thomas on MJ's shit list. And anyone who ends up on MJ's shit list, as we learned through this 10-part documentary, is screwed forever.

Speaker 4 Well, yeah, I mean, look at the teams that he's associated himself with. They're all in the Eastern Conference after he left the Bulls.
You got the Wizards and then you got Charlotte.

Speaker 4 And so, yeah, I don't think that MJ

Speaker 4 like considers himself bull for life i think that he considers that team that he played on like the epitome of the bulls but yeah he he obviously does not have any love for that organization whatsoever um but damn that was it was awesome and i don't know if i'm saying that the documentary was awesome because there's absolutely nothing going on in sports and it was it was like moderately captivating but the last like you know four weeks five weeks however long it's been has been as close as i've gotten to to feeling like I'm watching a sport since they went away in March.

Speaker 1 It was a great ending. I thought actually the Steve Kerr section was one of the best parts of the entire documentary.
You know,

Speaker 1 I think a lot of people, just judging by the timeline, didn't even know the story about his dad being assassinated.

Speaker 1 But then the connection of MJ losing his dad, Steve Kerr losing his dad, them not talking about it, but then getting to that game-winning shot in game six of the 97 finals.

Speaker 1 Like, that was so, so well done.

Speaker 1 The

Speaker 1 watching, like, the biggest story of that last season and MJ talking about like his ability to control a game with his mind and his and like guile, it's incredible because it really is.

Speaker 1 Like, he wasn't the same guy, he wasn't jumping over people, he wasn't the guy before baseball that was just, you know, athletic freak and superior in everything when it comes to a basketball court.

Speaker 1 He had to use some of like the smarts and the angles. And

Speaker 1 if you remember watching him like the pump fakes and the post-game and just using every single bag in his tricks to get that team to a sixth championship. It was awesome to watch.

Speaker 1 Great documentary, some great moments.

Speaker 1 And you're right, I'm going to miss it on Sunday nights.

Speaker 4 Reggie Miller finally making appearance was something that I think we've all been waiting for.

Speaker 4 I thought that the biggest card that MJ could have played in this documentary is just never including anything about those Pacers teams.

Speaker 4 And for a little bit, I thought that they just weren't going to talk about them at all. And they did gloss over those Pacers teams a little bit.

Speaker 4 But the second that I knew that there was a difference between Reggie Miller and Michael Jordan was in this documentary when Reggie Miller said, when you get to a game seven, you just throw away your game plan entirely because it's all about who wants it more in a game seven.

Speaker 4 It's like, that's exactly what somebody who loses a game seven says. Like, yeah, the whole like they wanted it more, and we you don't have a game plan.

Speaker 4 Michael Jordan wanted you to think that they didn't have a game plan.

Speaker 4 Michael Jordan absolutely had a game plan in that game seven, and Reggie glossed over that the push-off that he had, which, I mean, that's fair. That was a little Kyle Rudolph moment where he just

Speaker 4 gave him the shove.

Speaker 1 The dance after, too. The all-time Reggie Miller is just a little twerp.
But yeah, he,

Speaker 1 I mean, MJ said that they were going to win that game seven beforehand. He guaranteed it.
And there was actually an awesome story that Zach Lowe did like a little story behind that series.

Speaker 1 And he had an anecdote from Phil Jackson saying,

Speaker 1 Phil Jackson said to the players before game seven, he said, the important thing is to not fear losing. And to embrace the idea you could lose, face that.

Speaker 1 But before he could get started, MJ just said, fuck that, Phil. We're not losing.
Put our hands in the middle, said one, two, three bowls, and went home.

Speaker 1 That was the pregame speech of like Phil Jackson being like, hey, guys, you have to have the fear of losing in your heart. And MJ's like, no, dude, we're not going to fucking lose.

Speaker 4 In an homage to the documentary itself, I'm going to jump around for one second and go fast forward to the 98 series, and then we can go back and talk about other stuff.

Speaker 4 But the alleged push-off that he had on that shot when there was 6.6 seconds left when the ball's in the air in game six,

Speaker 4 I think this documentary changed my mind. I no longer think that it was a foul that he pushed off.

Speaker 1 It definitely wasn't a foul in 90s NBA because

Speaker 1 Reggie Miller's push-off, and people were getting mad at me because I was pre-complaining about the Reggie Miller push-off, he was a full-on shove.

Speaker 1 Like, MJ had some contact, but if you see the reverse angle, so the reverse angle can show that he really didn't push him, he guided him. And in that NBA, in the 90s NBA, that's never called a foul.

Speaker 4 I think think that Jordan's been sitting on that reverse angle footage for just the right time.

Speaker 4 Like when LeBron makes his move out to the West Coast, gets in Los Angeles, looks like he's putting together a good team.

Speaker 4 He's like, okay, I'm going to drop this documentary just so I can drop this one angle that no one's ever really seen that makes it look like I did not push off Biden Russell, which now I totally believe it.

Speaker 4 He did not push him off. But with Reggie Miller, you also have to take into account that Reggie Miller, in that moment when he pushed off, he looked like he could probably bench press

Speaker 1 Kevin Durant amounts.

Speaker 4 That's true. Right.
So if he pushed off, that's like a fly landing on an elephant's ass.

Speaker 1 I'm taking my anger at the push-off more. It's more my anger at the dance when he just started twirling around.
And like that one, I just, Reggie Miller's a twerp. And so

Speaker 1 the Brian Russell push-off, alleged push-off, which wasn't a push-off. That last 40 seconds,

Speaker 1 is so incredible when you look at it.

Speaker 1 Like the fact that no bull touched the ball after MJ gets the ball in, inbounded from Scotty, goes right to the hoop within like five seconds, scores, then strips Carl Malone, then brings the ball up, then shoots the game-winning shot.

Speaker 1 No one else touched the ball. That was it.
It was like, this is it. This is my moment.
This is the absolute pinnacle of everything. Rodman even said it: like, he's fucking shooting.

Speaker 1 I'm going to get out of the basket. There's no chance he's not shooting.

Speaker 4 He started walking.

Speaker 1 Yeah. And Pippin was like, they actually did a really good job in the documentary.
Like, Pippin was not... It's actually,

Speaker 1 there were two moments that, you know, there's always these debates about today's NBA versus the NBA 20 years ago. Two moments that strike you, and you're like, okay, this is

Speaker 1 so, so different. One was when

Speaker 1 they were all doing the half-court shot, or the, not the half-court shot, the shot from like the timeout spot on the bench before one of the finals games, and they were all airballing it.

Speaker 1 It was all short misses, yeah. These are layups for Steph Curry, and MJ finally hits it, but the entire team misses it beforehand.
That was the first one.

Speaker 1 And the second one is Scotty Pippen being like an absolute shell of himself in that game, and the Jazz not figuring out a way to just like punish him.

Speaker 1 Like, that would be, they would just, they would just switch on, like, they would basically run everything at him all game long and make it so that he can't be on the court.

Speaker 1 Like, you can't just be a decoy on the court because the MJ back then was just slower, and it was like a rock fight, and the ball was being walked up, and it just wasn't the same game.

Speaker 1 So, those were the two moments where I was like, Yep, okay, totally different game.

Speaker 4 He was a decoy.

Speaker 4 If you want to talk about like getting a suspect big sausage pizza delivered to your place the night before, Pippin was playing, like, he got his back blown out in that game and was just like hobbling up and down the court.

Speaker 4 Like, he had his hand on his lower back, and like the entire time, every shot that you saw was Scotty like grimacing.

Speaker 4 I think it's a big indictment of Jerry Sloan's ability to know when your opponent is physically in pain. Like, he didn't know that Jordan had the flu or food poisoning.

Speaker 1 I didn't know he did. I knew he was doing coins.

Speaker 4 That Scotty Pippen was on death's door in that game. Like, come on, Jerry.
And this is a scene.

Speaker 4 Actually, like, if social media was around then, you better believe that Jerry Sloan would have known about it, would have known that there was stuff going on, probably changed his game plan up a little bit.

Speaker 4 But yeah,

Speaker 4 he did not really have his finger on the pulse of the health of the other team.

Speaker 1 And so, the other things we had had in this documentary, the had, let's see, I had some notes down. Oh, the shit list was obviously Carl Malone MVP 97, which we knew.

Speaker 1 And

Speaker 1 they put the huge fucking like

Speaker 1 tarp poster board outside of the Delta Center, whatever it was called.

Speaker 1 And

Speaker 1 MJ sees that and is like, what the fuck, dude? Like, you get twice in MJ's career, they gave the MVP to someone else just because there was voter fatigue.

Speaker 4 And both times he was like okay cool you just made my shit list I'm gonna be that much more motivated it was also hilarious after every defeat in those finals they made a point of showing like Carl Malone and John Stockton had like little waiting areas that they would sit in uh-huh to receive Michael Jordan.

Speaker 4 Like it was like, okay, you're going to sit in this chair until Jordan comes by and shakes your hand and says, good game.

Speaker 4 Like, if I were them, fuck no, I'm not waiting around for Michael Jordan to shake my hand after he just beat me. Like,

Speaker 4 why do I need to do that? And then Stockton's short shorts were amazing, and they're coming back.

Speaker 4 I think that's a take I squatted on starting back in 2016 is at some point short shorts are going to make their way back. I think they are.

Speaker 4 But one thing people don't talk enough about when it comes to John Stockton is his chest hair, his weirdly high chest. It's even, it's like neck hair.

Speaker 4 It's at the nape of his neck, and it looks like he's just got like some caterpillars crawling out of the top of his jersey. I don't know anybody else that grows hair right there.

Speaker 1 Maybe Brent Holmes. We do not talk about enough with John S.
We don't have to. I'd like to get a bit more.

Speaker 4 Y'all ain't ready for that conversation.

Speaker 1 You know what's crazy?

Speaker 1 That game six of the 98 finals with

Speaker 1 the shot and MJ finishing his career with the Bulls,

Speaker 1 that will forever be the most watched NBA game of all time. 35.89 million people

Speaker 1 were watching that game concurrently. I think it was something like 90 million overall throughout the whole game.
The closest it's ever been since then is

Speaker 1 31 million for the game seven, Golden State Cleveland. That's a close 4 million off, and that's a game seven of LeBron like versus a historic team in Golden State.
And think about the way TV has gone.

Speaker 1 Like it's going to keep getting more and more fractured. That will be the most watched NBA game of all time.
It's crazy to think about that, but that's how popular it was.

Speaker 1 That's like the peak of everything.

Speaker 1 It was funny because I was looking through all the TV ratings, and then I see like the Spurs versus the Cavs when the Spurs swept the Cavs and LeBron, like somehow got the Cavs team to the finals.

Speaker 1 Like 7 million people were watching that finals compared to 35 million watching this game seven.

Speaker 1 It's just crazy to think about how popular MJ was and how captivated the entire country was that he can go away. Like 20 years later, we can say that is still the most watched basketball game ever.

Speaker 3 Even crazier is it really shows how popular Leo DiCaprio was because despite all of that, when he came in the locker room, MJ was like, yo, thanks for coming, man. Like, appreciate it.

Speaker 1 Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 4 The man in the mask. Yeah, I watched the man in the mask before the game.
Yeah,

Speaker 4 Leo showing up at that point.

Speaker 4 What was Leo? Leonardo DiCaprio must be the most bored person in the world when he goes to Utah. What the fuck is he going to do out there?

Speaker 4 Yeah, that's a major fly-in, and then I'm going to Vegas to spend the night type move for him.

Speaker 1 That was a pretty funny scene. It was just so random.
Like, what the hell is Leo doing in a UCLA hat?

Speaker 4 And then afterwards, to be a fan of either team, after they win, they go to the hotel, and Jordan just gets on the piano and doesn't know how to play.

Speaker 4 That's how you know that no one can say shit to you when you sit down at an instrument that you can't play and just bang on it for about 30 minutes and everyone's leaning over listening to you play like you're Duke Ellington.

Speaker 1 Yeah, holding court. And I also loved the part in the documentary about MJ and the security guards and, you know, and Gus, who he, who he was like treated, you know, was like a second father to him.

Speaker 1 It really does speak to how

Speaker 1 insanely famous he is. And what happens to a lot of famous people is they just basically can only be friends with their immediate family and the security guards hired to protect them.

Speaker 1 And like he, he, but you could tell it was a real friendship and it was a real relationship.

Speaker 1 And those scenes of just MJ sitting in that back room with all his security guards and Ahmad Rashad, who, by the way, was working as a journalist for NBC at the time, doing all the broadcasts. And

Speaker 1 like, it's just a great scene. It was cool to kind of see those moments where he was just hanging out in his extra, extra, extra large suits that were always so swaggy.

Speaker 4 Dude, MJ's suit that he put on, I think think it was after they beat the Pacers and he went to Larry Bird and he said like, fuck you, or whatever.

Speaker 4 Larry Bird said, fuck you, bitch, because he beat him.

Speaker 4 The suit he was wearing, the giant like yellow tan suit that was from the mask.

Speaker 4 That was the suit that Jim Carrey wore in the entire movie when he was like doing swing dancing and all that bullshit.

Speaker 4 Jordan probably has the highest ratio of shitty fits to just career greatness of anybody in the modern era.

Speaker 1 Well, it's crazy too because he's made some of the most iconic shoes and been part of the most iconic brand, you know, with those shoes.

Speaker 1 And then, you know, he had a deal with Oakley where he got Oakley's, where he got to design his sunglasses. He was wearing those at the last parade.
Just the worst sunglasses you've ever seen.

Speaker 1 Like, the suits are insane. So he has this, like, specific ability to be incredible with shoes.
And then everything else is just way off when it comes to fashion and an eye for design.

Speaker 4 Right. I mean, that's what it's like.
If you're famous enough at one thing, they'll let you try whatever you want in other realms, and people will tell you that you look good at it.

Speaker 4 But that suit, yeah, it looked like the tarp that they bring out to euthanize horses at the Kentucky Derby. That thing was, actually, now that I'm thinking about it, I kind of want to get it.

Speaker 4 It was like a six-piece, button-down, double-breasted deal. And then

Speaker 1 passed his dick.

Speaker 4 If we're going to talk about Fitz, we got to talk about Steve Curtis cargo shorts.

Speaker 1 Which weren't cargo shorts. We screwed that up.

Speaker 1 You and I both tweeted that. They weren't technically cargo shorts, so everyone relax.
We get it.

Speaker 4 Anything can be cargo shorts if you can fit enough merchandise in them. And the pockets on those things, it was like a golf kilt.

Speaker 4 It looked like a skirt that he was wearing. And then he gets up on stage and he starts like roasting everybody and doing like a stand-up routine.

Speaker 4 That was one of the all-time great celebration speeches.

Speaker 1 Steve Kerr's the man. Like, there's no one who doesn't like Steve Kerr.
He is the man.

Speaker 1 And the fact that he's been part of all these iconic moments and all these iconic teams in NBA history it's crazy he's he's just the man he's such a likable dude and he's also one of those guys that when you when you hear him talk and you see an interview it's just always feels like you're learning something that's also the biggest

Speaker 1 one of the one of the biggest takeaways from this entire documentary obviously you know people who who either don't remember or didn't know you know how great MJ was throughout the years,

Speaker 1 that's a big takeaway for them. But he was so good

Speaker 1 storytelling and commanding just the camera on the one-on-one interviews. It's incredible.
He and Scotty Pippen, too.

Speaker 1 Scotty Pippen has one of the best voices ever, but like MJ's ability, his reactions, his,

Speaker 1 you know, just his storytelling, I thought was phenomenal, and it just enhanced the whole thing.

Speaker 4 I was hoping that we would get some sort of explanation of how often he shaved his head, what his method was, because I never saw a single sprout of hair coming out of mj's dome he must have done like a straight razor like he had to kobe had a guy kobe had a guy but kobe had a guy and they must i think but that's a good point i think he shaved his head twice a day because if you shave when you wake up at 8 a.m and then you play at 8 p.m you're going to have a five o'clock shadow you're going to have some sort of wreath going on on your head by that point so he has to i don't think hair hair hair doesn't on your head doesn't grow that fast on your face it grows that fast But your head's part of your face.

Speaker 1 Right, but like the hair on your head doesn't grow as fast as the hair on your face, I don't think.

Speaker 4 I don't know. I think he probably shaved twice a day.

Speaker 1 He might have. He might have.

Speaker 1 The other

Speaker 1 person who went viral was the Indiana Pacers woman screaming, who in the twists of all twists is the mom of Luke Cornett. No? Nope.
That's not true.

Speaker 3 She was just, she was, she was trolling.

Speaker 1 Snopes?

Speaker 4 What does Snopes say about this?

Speaker 1 What the hell? That would have been crazy if she was Luke Cornette's mom.

Speaker 1 So she was trolling everyone on the internet?

Speaker 3 Yeah, she replied later on and was like, that's not actually me. We just look alike.

Speaker 4 She's like a newscaster.

Speaker 1 Oh, she went viral.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 4 Well, if she didn't go viral, then

Speaker 4 the name Karen went viral when she came out because everyone was saying like this person is sending. three different entrees back and asking for the manager.

Speaker 1 Okay, so she is Luke Cornette's mom. She pretended that that was her.

Speaker 1 It wasn't her, which actually is kind of funny because that's actually a really funny thing to play on the like a trick on the internet for the internet to see a white woman screaming and then another white blonde woman be like, that was me.

Speaker 1 And everyone's like, yeah, it was. Fuck you.

Speaker 4 She's practicing self-care in.

Speaker 1 Oh, unreal.

Speaker 1 That was a great moment, though. Any other things? Well, yeah,

Speaker 4 let's talk about Dennis Rodman skipping practice after a finals game to go join

Speaker 4 NWO and skipping practice to hang out with Hulk Hogan and hit people with folding chairs. That's the very definition of some things are bigger than sports.

Speaker 4 Let that shit slide.

Speaker 4 Not a jury in the world would convict you for doing something like that.

Speaker 1 No, it's listen, the old saying,

Speaker 1 flags fly forever, banners fly forever. That's fine.

Speaker 1 NWO is for life. It's for life.
So when you're in NWO, it's for life. So I do not begrudge him at all for doing that.

Speaker 1 Not an interesting guy, though.

Speaker 3 It is crazy how the guys that allegedly...

Speaker 1 He went and fucking smacked Diamond Dallas Page with a chair in between game

Speaker 1 three and four of the finals.

Speaker 4 It was amazing. It was amazing.
What a fucking lunatic.

Speaker 4 You would think that if he was flying out of the Chicago airport.

Speaker 4 And he's getting on a plane, there were probably like at least 15 or 20 people in that airport that were like, Dennis, where are you going? You can't leave.

Speaker 4 Just random people, random fans that happened to be in that airport. Like, Dennis, why are you leaving town? You can't leave town.

Speaker 4 He's like, no, I'm going down to Florida because I got to administer some justice with the New World Order.

Speaker 1 No, well, it was in Michigan, so not too far. So he gets past there.

Speaker 4 It gave off big Florida vibes. You'll forgive me for assuming it was Tampa.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Yeah.
What were you going to say, Hank?

Speaker 3 It's crazy that if the food poisoning thing is true, and I obviously believe it is, because so many people, they shaped it that way, and the trainer that was there said it.

Speaker 3 It's crazy that none of those guys have come forward or like confirmed anything. You would think at some point someone would say something.

Speaker 4 I have a theory about that.

Speaker 4 I just started like mulling around in my head when I was watching, but Bill Walton was a commentator in that series, which is crazy that Bill Walton and Marv Albert were on the same team together. But

Speaker 1 no, no, no. On radio, it was Bob Costas.
It was Bob Costas, Isaiah Thomas, and Doug Collins. I absolutely

Speaker 4 absolutely heard Bill Walton in some of those clips.

Speaker 1 He might have been doing radio, but Bob Costa, it was Bob Costas on TV.

Speaker 4 Okay, so Bill Walton was there, and my theory is that the pizza was meant for Bill and it had psilocybin mushrooms on it, and that Jordan was just tripping balls during that game, not the flu.

Speaker 1 Oh, he was tripping balls, not actually like puking everywhere?

Speaker 4 Tripping balls, baby. He just couldn't.
Some people can handle their

Speaker 4 psychedelics. Some people can't.

Speaker 1 I kind of wish they had given us one of the

Speaker 1 classic Bob Costas intros that he would do for NBC that always got you so jacked up. He would do his little soliloquy and then it would and then it would do the round ball rock.

Speaker 1 There was nothing, nothing better.

Speaker 1 But he also Bob Costas did the thing where

Speaker 1 it was, okay, so Bill Wall was a studio analyst. I'm looking it up right now.

Speaker 1 Yeah, the call was Doug Collins, Isaiah Thomas, Bob Costas. Bob Costas, MJ was so widely popular, he just called him Michael during the game.
Like he would say, Michael for two.

Speaker 1 Who does that?

Speaker 1 That's not, I mean, you could do it with LeBron because that's LeBron, and that's a different, unique name, but he would, the name, for the name Michael to be just the first, like, Kobe gets it because it's Kobe.

Speaker 1 Again, it's if you have a unique name, it's a little different.

Speaker 1 But for a name like Michael and just to keep saying like, Michael for two, Michael for, you know, Michael for three, Michael with the rebound, it's hilarious to listen back to.

Speaker 4 Yeah, it was very funny. Bob Costason, just in general, I love, he needs to be a part of every documentary.
I don't care what it's about.

Speaker 4 He just has a personality and just a way of speaking that makes it, it feels like he's always on camera and Ken Burns is always asking him questions. Mm-hmm.

Speaker 1 All right, so any other thoughts? I mean, the ending obviously broke my heart because it's like they definitely would have won a seventh in my mind.

Speaker 1 That was the lockout year, so they would have had a lot of, they would have had a lot of rest. They wouldn't have had to start for a long time.
Like it would have been a different, you know,

Speaker 1 it just wasn't. I think they played like 50 games, so it just wasn't the same toll that it took.
And to hear MJ say, like, yeah, we, you don't think all these guys would have come back for one?

Speaker 1 Now, there were, like, Dennis Rodman was kind of shot at that point. Like, he was kind of on the tail end or past the tail end.
Pippin went and got paid a couple times, which he needed to get paid.

Speaker 1 But, like, if they had brought it back for for another year, I, it would be tough to think that anyone would have beaten them.

Speaker 4 It's also easy to say right now, like, I guarantee you, everybody would have come back. Like, who knows what would have happened?

Speaker 1 No, Pippen would have been the hard one. He probably would have been the one that's pretty much, he would have had to, MJ would have had taken a lot less, and Pippen would have had to get paid a lot.

Speaker 4 Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 4 But, yeah, I'm sad that we're not going to have that to talk about on Sundays anymore because it was a very good series, even though it did jump around a whole lot.

Speaker 4 Made me feel like I was a time traveler. That's the one qualm qualm that I had about it.

Speaker 4 Also, is Michael Jordan married? They didn't talk, yeah. I don't think he's married right now.

Speaker 1 Well, so I think the reason why they didn't talk about it was his wife, who it was his wife throughout the 90s and had, you know, the mother of the three grown children, they got divorced in the early 2000s, which is, uh, I'm pretty sure Madrashad got divorced like right around the same time, which just shows how good of friends they are.

Speaker 1 They're just like, let's get single together. And then he has a new wife who he has, I think, twins with,

Speaker 1 so who's a lot younger. So I think that, I don't know, it's kind of tough.
Like, I agree. They probably should have.

Speaker 1 I would have liked to hear more from the kids, the grown adult kids, and, you know, his wife at the time, but yeah.

Speaker 4 Well, they're probably on his shit list, too.

Speaker 4 Like, his son that he named after himself is probably, like, on Michael Jordan's shit list for trying to upstage his dad by being named the same thing as him.

Speaker 4 Like, I wouldn't be surprised if Michael Jordan, you know how every dad at some point gets beaten by their kid and horse, and that changes the dynamic?

Speaker 4 I doubt that Michael Jordan will ever get beaten by his own children anything.

Speaker 1 No, definitely not.

Speaker 4 And if he does, they're out of the will. But it is very funny to think about, like, Ahmad Rashad talking to Michael Jordan, and MJ's like, hey, I'm getting divorced.

Speaker 4 If you want to go Splitsville, yeah, let's just do it together. Yeah.
And Ahmad's like, yeah, this is going to be sick. This is going to be the best time of my life.

Speaker 4 And then they go hang out for a while, and it's just MJ slang, and Ahmad Rashad goes home to his hotel room every night alone.

Speaker 1 By the way, just one point: MJ did not name either of his sons Michael Jordan, just so we were clear, because I do make fun of LeBron for naming his son LeBron James Jr.

Speaker 1 and then being like, I don't want anyone to know that he's my son.

Speaker 1 He named him.

Speaker 1 He did the reverse of one of his sons. So he's Michael Jeffrey Jordan.
He named his son Jeffrey Michael Jordan. Got it.
Got it.

Speaker 1 Kind of a cool little twist. Totally.

Speaker 1 I bet you one of them is like, I bet you

Speaker 1 he's like, why couldn't you just name me Michael Jordan? Like, it'd be so much better if I was just Michael Jordan Jr.

Speaker 4 Yeah, you could at least market yourself a little bit.

Speaker 4 You definitely have a television career doing like sideline reporting.

Speaker 1 I think they're doing okay. I think they're all doing all.

Speaker 4 Yeah, I think the family's pretty well off right now.

Speaker 4 Michael Jordan, I could also just watch a documentary where it's Michael looking at iPads of people that he's known throughout his life saying various things about him, making various statements.

Speaker 1 Drinking out of his

Speaker 1 out of his tequila.

Speaker 1 Maybe, maybe it's just the next last dances: Michael Jordan drinking out of his tequila glass and then showing him like funny nutshot videos on the iPad and having him laugh, cackle.

Speaker 1 I've watched that forever.

Speaker 4 Yes, that's what Jimmy Kimmel should do instead of doing his Carl Malone impression: is just show it, do the mean tweets segment, but it's for Michael Jordan and give me 12 hours of Michael Jordan reading mean tweets about himself.

Speaker 1 Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.

Speaker 1 All right, so great, yeah, great documentary. I can't believe it went by so fast.

Speaker 1 I've been doing this thing in my head that if we were, if the coronavirus were the football season, we would be like, if the coronavirus were the college football season, we would be like almost at the end.

Speaker 4 What do you mean?

Speaker 1 Like we're week 10 now, week 11. Okay, got it, got it.
Yeah. So we'd have like three games, three regular season games left.
Right. It's about

Speaker 4 Thanksgiving week right now.

Speaker 1 Yes, I keep doing that in my head where I'm like, man, if the coronavirus, think about it, if the coronavirus were the NFL season, we would already be past halfway.

Speaker 4 Yeah, well, if it's college football, now we're about to get a month off before the Bulls pick up.

Speaker 3 True. I mean, when I found out that it was supposed to be like the Western Conference, Eastern Conference finals today, that blew my mind.

Speaker 1 Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 1 All right, well, let's do who's back.

Speaker 1 And then we'll get to our interview with Carl Malone. Actually, I'll just start because my who's back is sports, and I'm feeling positive, okay?

Speaker 4 I'm starting to feel positive.

Speaker 1 We had NASCAR come back. We had a little golf thing, which I didn't even understand what was going on.
And we had the Bundeslaga. So

Speaker 1 Bundesliga, Bundeslaga, I don't fucking know, but I watched every second of it. I bet every single over.

Speaker 1 This is how it happens.

Speaker 3 Is that better or worse than the Premier League?

Speaker 1 It is. It's pretty good.
I think it's...

Speaker 1 Well,

Speaker 1 the top of it is like Bayern Munich is better than probably any team in the Premier League. It's pretty much the same.

Speaker 4 Most of them. Here's everything I know about Bundesliga right now.
One,

Speaker 4 they have a bunch of American teenagers that go over there to get famous and then no longer play for, will never play for MLS clubs for the rest of their life. I know that.

Speaker 4 Claudia Reynolds' son plays, Claudia Reynolds's son, excuse me, plays on one of the teams. They had Pusilicic

Speaker 4 played on one of their teams for a while, right?

Speaker 4 Oliver Kahn, he used to be a goalkeeper in the Bundesliga. I know that.
I know that the Wolves have a jersey that's an Xbox symbol. So that's kind of cool.

Speaker 1 That's it. That's all I know about shit.
I'm just going to keep betting the over in every single game. And just, it's nice.

Speaker 1 We've said it, but it's nice to have a ball moving back and forth on your screen. That's really all it is.
I turned it on on Saturday morning, and it felt good to see.

Speaker 1 And then, of course, I complained about no goals. And people were like, bro, you can't complain.
Sports are back. I'm like, listen, let's get one thing clear right now.

Speaker 1 When sports come back, I'm going to revert right back to my sports fandom instantly. I will complain about everything instantly.
That's what sports fans do.

Speaker 1 That's when you know it's back, when we can complain. So don't give me this like, hey, man, just appreciate that it's back.
No, no, no, no. I'm going to complain.
That's what sports fans do.

Speaker 4 That's what we missed about sports was complaining about sports more than anything.

Speaker 1 And you're right.

Speaker 4 Like, for you, it's the ball moving back and forth. For me, it's just that color green on my screen.

Speaker 4 I don't care if it's a fairway that Dustin Johnson is walking his, carrying his own bag down that's probably filled with like an eight ball as well as like all his golf clubs.

Speaker 4 I don't care if it's the NASCAR infield. I don't care if it's the Bundas Liga.
I just want that color green on my screen. They did the thing where they don't have fans in the stands either.

Speaker 4 So they caught, there was like a live mic that picked up one of the players telling the other guy, like, hey, go fuck your mother. And you know that, you know, Roger Dell's watching that.

Speaker 4 He's like, I can't, I definitely need to pump in some crowd noise if Mason Rudolph is going to be on this field with absolutely, you know, nothing but silence around him.

Speaker 4 I need to make sure that that tape never gets out.

Speaker 1 Absolutely.

Speaker 4 I also just think Germans shouldn't be allowed to congregate in large groups in general. So I'm fine with that.

Speaker 1 Hank, do you have your who's back?

Speaker 3 Yes, I do.

Speaker 4 It's Shorts.

Speaker 1 Yeah, Hank, you stole mine. Damn.
Wow.

Speaker 1 Damn.

Speaker 4 Shorts, big time back. Huge back for Shorts.

Speaker 1 Take it away, PFD.

Speaker 4 I mean, I'm so excited. I packed up all my shit this weekend.
I put all my sweatpants on the highest shelf where I can't reach them. So it's about like five feet off the ground.

Speaker 4 They are done. I'm done with pants for the summertime.
I think from this point on, from now until Labor Day, I'm going shorts only.

Speaker 1 Oh,

Speaker 3 on the record. On the record.

Speaker 1 Shorts guy?

Speaker 4 Skies out, thighs out. We're going shorts all day every day.

Speaker 1 Come on, man. Come on.
Mix in some pants every now and like if it's 50 degrees. Shorts.
Don't be that guy. Shorts, guys are weird.

Speaker 4 What do you mean shorts guys? Or Andy Reid?

Speaker 1 What I just said, yes. Shorts guys are weird.
What did I stutter?

Speaker 4 I'm fine. I'm fine with being weird when it comes to shorts.

Speaker 1 I've missed it. People who

Speaker 1 demand to wear shorts no matter the weather are weird. I don't know.

Speaker 1 Everyone knows the fat shorts guy who wears shorts in the middle of winter. Yes, Andy Reid is that category.
That's a weird move.

Speaker 4 I don't demand to wear shorts, but I will absolutely celebrate the return of shorts like nobody else.

Speaker 1 So, you will wear shorts in spite of weather.

Speaker 4 Here's how my seasons go: it's either shorts season or it's soup season. I thought about ordering soup yesterday, and I was like, it's a little too hot out.
I'm wearing shorts.

Speaker 4 There's no overlap there.

Speaker 4 You can't eat soup while wearing shorts. You just can't.
It doesn't go together. You can eat a popsicle.
I had ice cream today in the middle of the day.

Speaker 1 What about a little clam chowder in the summertime?

Speaker 4 No, it sits too heavy. It sits too heavy heavy in shorts.
And if you spill it on your shorts, then it looks like there's some explaining to do.

Speaker 1 Gazpacho.

Speaker 4 Gazpacho? Yeah, a little chilled soup, yeah. Okay, now you're talking me into it.
But yeah,

Speaker 4 queso is not soup.

Speaker 1 Oh, yeah. Yeah, it is.

Speaker 4 Queso is not soup.

Speaker 1 It's served in a bowl. It's liquid.

Speaker 1 You use like

Speaker 1 chips, which are basically spoons. They're edible spoons.

Speaker 3 Yeah, it's bread. It's like the bread that comes with soup.

Speaker 1 I think queso is the soup.

Speaker 4 Well, okay, maybe I'm a hypocrite when it comes to soup and shorts, but the bottom line is shorts are back big time for the summer, and I'm so, so excited about it.

Speaker 1 Same.

Speaker 1 All right. Hey, we got any other who's backs?

Speaker 4 People asking, does the NFL have an arrest problem?

Speaker 1 Is back.

Speaker 4 Does the NFL have a player discipline problem? Because I think four people got arrested on Saturday. Ed Oliver got pulled over for DUI and had a gun.

Speaker 4 The cornerbacks down in Florida, their whole gun situation. I don't know if you read the police report about that, but they were talking about what was stolen from the people at that party allegedly.

Speaker 4 And one was like a $30,000 watch. The other was like a $24,000 watch.
And then the third person was a knockoff $600 Richard Milley watch. Is that how you pronounce it, Hank? Richard Milley? Yeah.

Speaker 4 And so, like, I give a lot of credit to that guy for being honest in his police report and saying, yeah, mine was a fake. It was a total fraud.

Speaker 1 They just recreated the scene from the Sopranos.

Speaker 1 They're like, you know what we're going to do?

Speaker 1 We just got to hit up the party. We got to hit up the card game, and we'll be rich.
Yeah.

Speaker 4 They got too much time. Players have too much time on their hands right now.
Ray Lewis was right. When there's no NFL, there's a problem in society called crime that will increase.

Speaker 1 Mm-hmm. It's fact.
Facts only.

Speaker 1 All right. Also,

Speaker 4 horny Kevin Durant is back.

Speaker 1 What did he do now?

Speaker 4 He's just smashing likes on pictures of women.

Speaker 1 I think

Speaker 1 he should be able to do whatever he wants.

Speaker 4 Yeah, I'm celebrating it.

Speaker 4 For me, that's the same as shorts. It's like the weather, you know, spring turns into summer.
Kevin Durant starts liking all these Instagram thoughts. It's fine.

Speaker 1 This is a moment in time in the history of the world where we need to be as a country, as a world, less judgmental.

Speaker 1 I saw this story yesterday about these Facebook moms who are basically treating baby Yoda dolls as their own children and dressing them up and talking to them.

Speaker 1 And everyone was like, this is terrifying. I was like, dude, you can't lock someone in their home for two months and then be like, wow, look how weird they are.
They're talking to their Yoda doll.

Speaker 1 That's just what they're going to do.

Speaker 1 Yeah, it's cute as hell.

Speaker 4 Tom Hanks turned a fucking volleyball into a fleshlight for five years when he was on an island. Like, let these Facebook moms just celebrate their cute little baby Yodas.

Speaker 1 Exactly. Everyone gets a pay.

Speaker 1 If you want to do something weird, if you're talking to your cat too much, if you're dressing up, you know, if you're playing little toy horses every night, whatever you do, it's cool.

Speaker 1 Just let it slide. Agreed.

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Speaker 1 Okay, here he is, Carl Malone.

Speaker 1 Okay, we now welcome on a very special guest. It is two-time MVP, 14-time All-Star, 11-time All-NBA first team, an NBA legend.
It is Carl Malone. We just were talking.

Speaker 1 You sent us, your son KJ sent us a package of El Leon Jimenez. So we appreciate that.
Get everything off on the right foot. How are you doing? You're in your...

Speaker 1 What's going on? What's the scene that's going on right now for people who are just listening to this?

Speaker 6 Well, I've been out working.

Speaker 6 Me and KJ have been working today,

Speaker 6 running heavy equipment. And I just thought maybe he told me that I could just be myself.
So that's how I was feeling today.

Speaker 6 I got a Frenchie right here named Willow.

Speaker 6 I got a dole woman slash roller right here named Athena to bite my hand. You can see her bite my hand here.

Speaker 6 And we've got all the animals in the background.

Speaker 1 I love it.

Speaker 4 That's your quarantine bunker right there.

Speaker 6 It's my quarantine bunker right now. Now, the real bunker is in the back back there with the fire on, but that's for another discussion here.
I know you guys' show is kind of

Speaker 4 we actually have a fuckload of people that have been on our show that have apocalypse bunkers. Yeah.

Speaker 1 It's kind of a theme.

Speaker 1 All right. Adam Warring

Speaker 1 has an apocalypse bunker. Good friend of ours.

Speaker 6 Okay. Okay.
All right.

Speaker 1 Yes, sir. So

Speaker 1 we want to talk about a bunch of stuff.

Speaker 1 First,

Speaker 1 let's go with. Have you watched any of the last dance at all?

Speaker 6 No, you're going to lose me real quick.

Speaker 1 Okay, that's what I thought. I thought, because

Speaker 1 I was wondering if they even asked you to be on it. Did they ask you?

Speaker 6 No, they didn't.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 1 All right. All right.

Speaker 4 Yeah, so you don't want to be in another man's documentary well uh i guess i just throw the gauntlet down him

Speaker 6 uh i i think i would have been in if they would have had like uh dick vevetta somebody in there with me i would have did it with him ah i like that not getting the call like him and like danny crawford or joy crawford one of them damn crawford i don't know which one it was anyway they would have had them on there would have but no well we're not we're not They make it care.

Speaker 1 Okay. Okay.
It's just, obviously, everyone's going to be reliving the 90s here in the next couple weeks because there's no sports.

Speaker 1 So it's a weird thing that's going on where everyone's going back in time. And we haven't gotten to the episodes where you would be in there.
But I understand.

Speaker 1 Maybe we'll do another one with Dick Bovetta. And I like that idea.

Speaker 6 Yeah, yeah. You know, if Dick Bovetta was in it, him and I think Danny Crawford and George Crawford, I would have did it with them, sitting right beside him.

Speaker 6 But BNA wasn't in it, I didn't think they wanted me in it.

Speaker 1 That's all right. Gotcha.

Speaker 4 Well, let me ask you a question about refereeing then. Did Jordan push off on that last shot?

Speaker 6 No, I done said all of that already. Let's talk about something else.
What do you want to talk about?

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 4 Keystone Pipeline.

Speaker 4 No opinion on the Keystone Pipeline. I'm gratuitously uninformed on the Keystone Pipeline.

Speaker 1 All right, here's a question that I've always wondered. You had one of the longest routines at the free throw line.
How much of your life do you think you've spent at the free throw line?

Speaker 6 Probably half my life.

Speaker 1 What? Can you walk us through the routine that you had down?

Speaker 6 But I'll tell you like this. I once had an official tell me one time, Carl, man, if we called every file out here, we wouldn't have nobody playing.
And you know what I told him? Do your damn job.

Speaker 1 You know, call the damn file. Yeah.

Speaker 4 You also have probably my favorite nickname in the history of sports, the mailman. That's pretty sweet.
Did you get that to yourself or did somebody give it to you?

Speaker 6 No, come come on, man. You can't go around giving yourself nicknames.
That's corny. That's some corny shit.
You can't do that.

Speaker 1 Somebody else got to do it.

Speaker 4 You remember who it was?

Speaker 6 Yes, Teddy Allen. He was the sports information director at Louisiana Tech University.

Speaker 6 And he gave me that name

Speaker 6 before

Speaker 6 we was the only conference, which was a Southland conference. We was the only one that hadn't played yet because we had the ice storm come through to South.
So we couldn't play.

Speaker 6 So it was delayed for almost two weeks. And I finally played and had a decent game.
We won to go to the NCAA

Speaker 6 playoff.

Speaker 6 And

Speaker 6 it stuck. He said, hey, everybody should have been like the mailman.
He delivered. And it's stuck.
When we go to Memphis, we go to Memphis, played in the first round.

Speaker 6 One of the main boosters at Tech showed up, no, student at Tech,

Speaker 6 he showed up in a mailman outfit with the bag on. I signed it.
The rest is history.

Speaker 1 I like that. So,

Speaker 6 I got a question for you now.

Speaker 6 What's the shades on inside for? It makes me think, you know, what it makes me think. I can't say what it makes me think.

Speaker 1 You think I'm blind? Yeah, he's blind.

Speaker 1 That's what that's called.

Speaker 4 I'm wearing it in honor of my dog. My dog's blind.
So I wear these. I walk for those who can't.

Speaker 6 Why are you lying to to me?

Speaker 1 I have a dog blind.

Speaker 1 I have a blind dog, yeah.

Speaker 6 Oh, okay. I thought maybe

Speaker 6 this time of day

Speaker 6 or evening

Speaker 6 inside a studio with shades on, and they like the magnum PI shades too, by the way.

Speaker 6 Normally, last time I did something like this with somebody with some shades on,

Speaker 6 it wasn't nothing about puff puff gear.

Speaker 4 That's right. Yeah, that was last week.
Last week's show, I definitely definitely need the shades for that reason.

Speaker 6 Okay, all right, all right.

Speaker 1 Yes, okay, yes.

Speaker 1 Cheers to that. Cheers to that.
So PFT just brought up the mailman nickname. Do you think it's a little bullshit that the mail actually does deliver on Sundays now?

Speaker 1 And the famous Scotty Pippen thing should be gone because it does. The mail delivers on Sundays.

Speaker 6 Well, first of all. And we're going to cover a wide range of different things because I got my opinion.
And it's just my opinion. I'm not trying to influence nobody.

Speaker 6 But let's go back to something else you said. And one would say right now, you think I'm going to talk about Scotty Pippin?

Speaker 6 We're going to delve deeper into this. And I'm going to say to you,

Speaker 6 why in the hell

Speaker 6 do the U.S. Postal Service deliver on Sunday anyway? Last time I checked, they broke his hair.
So

Speaker 6 if anybody out there wants to know, I'm saying this to the U.S. Postal Service.
Please, our dear government, let the workers spend time with their family on Sunday.

Speaker 6 Look, I don't want you showing up at my house with a damn letter on a Sunday anyway. So I don't care nothing about that.
Right? So the U.S. Postal Service should not be delivered on Sunday anyway.

Speaker 1 I love that take. Yeah, that's a good answer to that question.

Speaker 4 The mailman. From

Speaker 1 Master General.

Speaker 6 I answered the question because you asked the question. So of course it is.
Hey, you might need to relax a little bit.

Speaker 1 you guys too uptight for me okay so all right i'll i'll i'll i'll take a sip and i'll relax so what about the scotty part of the question

Speaker 1 i i feel uncomfortable with my shirt off i have huge pepperoni nipples it's very uncomfortable for me let me see take a look oh they're big nipples

Speaker 1 he might even have a thing i have a skin disease or something

Speaker 1 yeah i got four i'm gonna put my shirt back on you know what i'm gonna put my shirt back on everyone wants to see my nipples i got four nipples

Speaker 1 on this what are you doing

Speaker 4 the problem is sitting with my shirt off is so bad if i was standing we could do this all day standing i feel like carl i feel in the dictionary if you were to look up country strong there would be a picture of carl malone you you know when you came into league weightlifting wasn't as big a deal as it is now what was your workout regimen when you were growing up in louisiana really didn't work out a lot

Speaker 6 uh when i was growing up in louisiana we just worked so it wasn't really a workout i got serious about weight training probably my second year at tech, but then when I got to the league, like when you get to the NBA,

Speaker 6 do not think your shit don't stink and you're the best that ever done it because it's somebody around the corner and hand it to you.

Speaker 6 So when I got there, I wanted to do something to kind of separate myself. So you're looking around and weight training wasn't huge then.
You know, it's a myth out there about weight training.

Speaker 6 Don't lift, you're going to throw your shot.

Speaker 6 Well,

Speaker 6 what I would always do was lift before practice. So when you go out there and shoot, you get your touch back.

Speaker 6 And believe it or not, when you had me, when I had weight training, my shot and everything was easier for me because I was strong. And a lot of the guys in the NBA didn't lift, and I knew that.

Speaker 6 Can you imagine if Charles Barkley and Shaquille O'Neal would have taken weight training serious?

Speaker 1 That'd be terrifying.

Speaker 6 They would have changed the rules. He was already,

Speaker 6 you know, you're talking about country stroll, him.

Speaker 6 But Charles Barkley, for what he could do, can you imagine if he would have took weight training series? I don't ever, I could be wrong.

Speaker 6 I don't think Charles lifted weight in his life.

Speaker 1 Probably

Speaker 4 he did the 12-ounce curls.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 4 A couple beers, a couple cold ones after the game.

Speaker 6 But the thing about it is

Speaker 6 weight training is so important, but a a lot of people didn't do it. And that's something that we was big on.
I started at tech and I wanted to be a little different. So I started training.

Speaker 6 And like I said, it's no doubt

Speaker 6 some of the falls I took,

Speaker 6 the back-to-back games. And I tell you, when I really, really noticed my weight training, and I'm going to take you guys back.
The year we got locked out.

Speaker 6 Now, news flash, a lot of fans don't don't know the difference between a lockout

Speaker 6 and a strike. The NBA locked us out.
We did not go on strike. Some people thought that.
And we had, I think every team had three sets, for sure, two, but I think three sets

Speaker 6 of back to back to back.

Speaker 6 Yep. And the weight trainer really helped me.
I think personally with that right there.

Speaker 4 It's interesting because you're saying that you took weight training seriously before a lot of of other players did in the 90s.

Speaker 4 And when you think back to that style of play, the narrative is always it was a more physical game back in the 90s. Do you agree with that?

Speaker 4 Or do you think that with all the physical conditioning that players have to do now with the weight training programs, that it's actually a more physical game these days?

Speaker 6 You stuck the nonsense.

Speaker 6 What do you don't compare what's happening now to back then? What are you talking about?

Speaker 1 Okay,

Speaker 6 let me explain.

Speaker 1 Yeah, go ahead. Go ahead

Speaker 6 to be a good talk, I gotta be a good listener.

Speaker 1 Go ahead, no, no, I want you to explain it.

Speaker 4 Yeah, I want to know why it's ridiculous to compare those two things.

Speaker 6 Hold on, number one:

Speaker 6 analytics right now.

Speaker 6 That's all they talk about. Analytics, sprinkle some analytics in there.
But all this,

Speaker 6 hold on,

Speaker 6 you know, my hat not getting hot. I'm just almost got a migraine just then thinking about players rest

Speaker 1 no load management yeah

Speaker 6 wait what

Speaker 6 before we get too far into the end of into this interview i want to say something else

Speaker 6 i own whatever i say on this right now so whatever i say i'm not coming back and said oh gosh I was misquoted. No.
So I just wanted to say I'm Carl Malone. I approve of this message.

Speaker 1 I like that. Okay.
Now.

Speaker 6 Okay, imagine this.

Speaker 6 And it happened. That's why I'm going to tell you this.

Speaker 6 So we live here in a little unbelievable, what we call God's country. If y'all good young men, when y'all pass on over to the other side, you'll be buried here.
It's God's country.

Speaker 6 Literally, we had a dad here. He had two sons, and they was a huge,

Speaker 6 huge, now keep in mind when I say they was,

Speaker 6 they was a huge Golden State Warrior fan.

Speaker 6 And

Speaker 6 a couple, you know, they was kind of say on the side a little bit, but they loved Steph Kerr, loved him.

Speaker 6 So he, he, he got the, he got them

Speaker 6 front row everything experience.

Speaker 6 Two Christmases ago, right?

Speaker 6 I'm talking about they had the Warriors Steph jersey on, the whole outfit. They were going to go to Dallas.

Speaker 6 So they leave on a Thursday.

Speaker 6 Visit the arena Friday, everything. The game was on a Saturday, I think.

Speaker 6 At game time, when people in the stand, right before they got ready to sing the national anthem, the PA NASA came on and said Steph Curry will not be playing for rest.

Speaker 1 Okay?

Speaker 1 Well,

Speaker 6 I don't know what happened in the game. That's irrelevant, what I'm telling you.

Speaker 6 They wore their jerseys and everything back. After the game, they drove back.
From that day forward, they have yet to even speak about the Warriors or wore anything because they were so disappointed.

Speaker 6 Well, case in point.

Speaker 6 Let's make a rule right now. Let's start this right now on part by take.
So I'm going to say pardon my damn take. I ain't part nothing.
I mean what I say.

Speaker 6 So let's go on record right now and say, if you're going to rest,

Speaker 6 if you going to rest,

Speaker 6 rest at home in front of your season ticket holder.

Speaker 1 I like that. I think at the bare minimum,

Speaker 4 they should let people know ahead of time if they're going to take a game off for rest.

Speaker 1 I think that's a fair point.

Speaker 1 You were losing me for a second? Then I like that. And you, by the way, we should just mention Carl Malone is saying this from

Speaker 1 a guy who in his 19 seasons, the only time he didn't play over 80 games, it was twice. One was an injury the last year, and the other was a lockout.
He played the maximum amount of games.

Speaker 1 So, if you look at his stats, it is literally 81, 82, 80, 81, 82, over and over and over.

Speaker 6 So, the emphasis has to be or should be

Speaker 6 back on the fans and less of the athlete because we're going to do what we do,

Speaker 6 but we don't have that. Okay, but we're going to wait to the all-star game and we're going to have the experience.
I think, I think, personally,

Speaker 1 i think

Speaker 6 a professional venue i'm talking about basketball i think it should be something to do with the fan experience every time they come walk in that arena yeah yeah absolutely

Speaker 1 i don't know but it's got to be an experience so go ahead what type of birds do you have in your room right now

Speaker 6 I have an African gray named Lisa. And if you're not careful, she's going to say something.
My son, KJ, just moved her over there because she's about to start talking.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 1 We can hear her. Yeah.
It's funny. Yeah.
So

Speaker 6 you see where you're at right now? You see the animals in the background?

Speaker 1 Yes. Yes.
Big game hunting.

Speaker 1 All about it.

Speaker 1 I want to get to that. I want to get to that.
I had a question about the famous pick and roll with you and John Stockton.

Speaker 1 What makes a perfect pick? Can there be a perfect pick? What would you do? What's the art of setting up a good screen, a good pick?

Speaker 6 Patience, patience, patience. Which, when I played, I didn't have a whole lot of it.

Speaker 6 I don't know if you ever seen it, but if you go back and if, I don't know,

Speaker 6 oh, I can't even tell you the number. So just for shits and giggles, let's say we ran the pick and roll a million times,

Speaker 6 right? In a ball, you know, over my career or whatever, right?

Speaker 6 If you see John Stockton,

Speaker 6 at least 75 to 80% of the time, he would be dribbling the ball and put his hand up and telling me to wait,

Speaker 6 which I didn't have it. I'm just high octane and I'm ready.
But if you go back and watch us, when he did that, we was not calling the play.

Speaker 6 He was watching me and he was telling me because if your point guard

Speaker 6 leave too quick, it just about always going to be an offensive foul on me. So he was protecting me as well.
So the perfect pick and role is patience, number one.

Speaker 6 Number two, as my coach Sloan would say, get some fucking meat on the guy, would you slap dicks?

Speaker 1 That's what Coach Sloan used to say.

Speaker 1 But

Speaker 6 when the perfect pick and role is, you can feel it. Like, first thing you do

Speaker 6 as the screener, you always protect the goods.

Speaker 6 All right. So you would see me come up, put my hand there, and you really and truly, it's all about the point guard.

Speaker 6 Because if the point guard is doing their job and not thinking about themselves,

Speaker 6 he will be patient. That's why

Speaker 6 it was just solid. I felt it.
I just, you know, you know it. And here's what's crazy about it.

Speaker 6 Our pick and roll,

Speaker 6 like I said, our pick and roll,

Speaker 6 we probably had

Speaker 6 30, 40 counters, 30 counters off our pick and roll, right, that we ran.

Speaker 6 I can recall maybe

Speaker 6 three times

Speaker 6 that I remember we never, I'm sorry, we never got past three times with our options.

Speaker 6 Now, think about what I just said. Yeah.

Speaker 6 You know, everybody knew they were going to be at, but we never got it because it was always set up for somebody right now.

Speaker 6 So it wasn't like, if you looked at our pick and roll, we very seldom passed more than four or five times because, number one, you had the best it ever did running the show.

Speaker 6 I was decent, so I was setting the pick, but all of our teammates knew where they were supposed to be at. And all they had to do was do it.
But it all started with John Stockton.

Speaker 4 Did you see when Chris Paul, a couple years ago, he said something after a game, he was talking about Stockton's assist record, and he was saying, I don't know who was tabulating the assists in Utah, but I don't think anybody's going to ever reach that mark.

Speaker 4 There was a there were some people that say that they would, you know, give Stockton an extra assist or two per game, keep his average up. Did you ever see any of that going on?

Speaker 6 Keep it moving.

Speaker 1 We got to throw a couple of those in there every now and then. All right.

Speaker 1 Did you see when Chris Paul said that? All right.

Speaker 1 I don't know.

Speaker 1 What? So I

Speaker 6 I like Chris Paul, but I don't give a rat's ass about that right there. We can talk about something else, can't we?

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Speaker 1 So, I know you're not watching the last dance, but there was the famous Olympics dream team that you were on, and the practice in Monte Carlo.

Speaker 1 Do you remember that practice said to be the greatest basketball game ever played?

Speaker 6 I would say it was.

Speaker 1 Sir,

Speaker 6 I'm going to say this and mean it.

Speaker 6 I'll never pay for a ticket to go into an NBA game ever.

Speaker 6 Might not even show my ID.

Speaker 1 But

Speaker 6 if I was going to buy a ticket

Speaker 6 to see what I witnessed and was a part of,

Speaker 6 I start the bidding at 10,000.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 6 I started at 10,000.

Speaker 6 So, what I'm saying to you, I would have, if I was into basketball like that, I would have put the first bid down. If witness what I witnessed and have an opportunity to see that, right?

Speaker 4 What was so special about that game?

Speaker 6 Like, that's what we realized. This was our tuna, and we realized not being arrogant or cocky

Speaker 6 was

Speaker 6 we got

Speaker 6 12 other bad and some bitches on the planet playing this game

Speaker 6 but we happen to be teammates

Speaker 6 god bless them

Speaker 6 so

Speaker 6 that was our tune-up yeah because in our mindset ain't no one out there gonna be as good as what right here and that was kind of our

Speaker 6 little

Speaker 6 when we say okay we know what we're here for okay we're gonna we're gonna do it but see what they what they don't realize,

Speaker 6 they made a big deal about what Charles did to the kid from Senegal.

Speaker 6 But they didn't see the things that they was doing to us.

Speaker 6 We're going to play like you play. If you want to keep it clean, we're going to keep it clean.

Speaker 1 Right?

Speaker 6 And,

Speaker 6 like Luke Brown would say, if you mess with one, you got to mess with us all.

Speaker 6 You know, that's how we work.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 6 But to me, to me, once we got there,

Speaker 6 we were like, okay,

Speaker 6 this is why we're here.

Speaker 6 We're here

Speaker 6 to kick ass, take names, and the asses that we kick, we wrote a name down so we can kick that same ass twice. That was our job.
Yeah.

Speaker 6 Don't try to use that one day either. But go ahead.

Speaker 1 There's a story that Magic told about how

Speaker 1 he was talking trash back and forth to MJ, and then Michael Jordan wins the game. They go on the bus, and he, you know, a few minutes awkward silence.

Speaker 1 He's like, damn, probably shouldn't have done that. And they all had a laugh.

Speaker 1 Could you feel like this is the, this is kind of the torch passing from 80s NBA to 90s with, you know, Magic Johnson and maybe Larry Bird being like, these young guys are something special?

Speaker 6 No.

Speaker 6 No, I never felt that. Maybe I wasn't aware

Speaker 6 because how I felt after our about our second practice in Chicago, getting ready for the Olympics,

Speaker 6 it's like everybody from that day, we didn't say anything or nothing. It's like everybody checked their egos at the door.

Speaker 6 They checked them at the door.

Speaker 6 After that second practice, when I started to feel like, okay. okay

Speaker 6 but the passing of the torch no we just knew that it would be in good hands. But no, I've never seen the passing of the torch.

Speaker 1 But

Speaker 6 like when you're a competitor like Magic, MJ, all of us, it don't take much to get us going.

Speaker 1 It really don't.

Speaker 6 Like

Speaker 6 if you look at

Speaker 6 any sport,

Speaker 6 the greatest athletes are what I call legends or hall of famers.

Speaker 6 If you talk to any one of them,

Speaker 6 our fuse is just right there and it never goes out. It's just simmering.
So it's going to take but a little prodding, right?

Speaker 6 So with the person that you say they okay basketball player, but maybe they don't let it level, you let them just do like a barking dog, right? You just let them yak, yap, yak, yak, yap.

Speaker 6 Because if you beat them,

Speaker 6 okay, you be the person that wasn't in your league.

Speaker 6 But when

Speaker 6 your peers

Speaker 6 start,

Speaker 6 when they go there, we're already primed. We're ready right now.
So that's what made it awesome. Like, we're just right under the surface.

Speaker 6 You know that old pimple on your ass that you can't get, but it's just right on the surface?

Speaker 6 That's our fuse bird. We're just right there.
Like, and if you talk to any of them, either now or back then,

Speaker 6 that fuse is always lit.

Speaker 6 It just take,

Speaker 6 and it happened to be that practice. It happened to be the Olympics because we was already primed.
We was already ready. But not one of us, and I don't care who,

Speaker 6 and I'm going to be the first to say this.

Speaker 6 I don't care if it was Michael Jordan,

Speaker 6 Scotty,

Speaker 6 Carl Malone, John Stockton, whoever.

Speaker 6 I don't think anybody was in awe of that person. Like that's that dude.
But let me go on record to be the first to tell you, I can't speak for them.

Speaker 6 But it wasn't a son of in the room that I thought, damn, that's that dude.

Speaker 6 No, I'm like, damn,

Speaker 6 I respect that dude.

Speaker 6 But she,

Speaker 1 I'm that dude.

Speaker 1 The hell with that.

Speaker 6 And he was going to say, she, I'm that dude. It wasn't,

Speaker 6 I didn't feel it all.

Speaker 1 Now,

Speaker 6 we did get, nobody know this, but we did, we are the only family that have

Speaker 6 the original

Speaker 6 and the only dream team,

Speaker 6 the dream team, and the one in Atlanta, the whole uniform in the sneakers. So

Speaker 6 we have those.

Speaker 6 I wanted that

Speaker 6 at the Olympics. So we're the only family that have that in the world.
And I don't display in our Toyota store in Draper, Utah. We got a museum that we built up there.

Speaker 6 But I wanted those to put in, you know, to keep safe. But I never was in awe of that guy.
But the respect level was over the top. But everybody had the respect level.

Speaker 4 So you obviously established yourself as one of the best players in the game by the time you went out to Los Angeles.

Speaker 4 You're put on a in an entirely new environment with entirely new teammates for the first time in your career. You have Gary Payton that's going out there too.

Speaker 4 It strikes me that you and him are two of the all-time best shit talkers in the history of the NBA. What was that first practice like?

Speaker 4 Did you guys have to talk a little shit to each other to get each other's respect?

Speaker 6 Well, contrary to what you may think, Weed Hopper,

Speaker 6 I did never start shit talking.

Speaker 6 But now,

Speaker 6 I once told a young man,

Speaker 6 you do know that I'm going to touch the ball every time down

Speaker 6 and you're not.

Speaker 6 So I'm about to beat your ass all night long. And as I'm going back down the floor, I'm saying to Coach Slong, Coach, kind gentleman, do you mind running that play again?

Speaker 6 So I never started talking shit like Gary. Gary just looked like he woke up to talk shit and he did.
What you have to do is you have to just put it in the compartment it needs to be put in.

Speaker 6 But I didn't really talk a lot of

Speaker 1 i was too busy trying to beat your ass and score so i didn't want to be talking to you okay um i got one of those questions you're probably not gonna answer but i'll throw it out there anyway i think we're just gonna talk about something else yeah okay all right so maybe you will answer it when you won your first mvp in 97 was there a part of you that was like shit this is gonna make michael jordan really mad

Speaker 1 uh no that was a good question though right that was a good question. Because it did make him really mad.

Speaker 6 It really was.

Speaker 6 I probably felt the same way

Speaker 6 in my felt the same way in my mind that Michael felt every time he plays somebody. I respect that dude, but I'm here to beat his ass.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 So that's interesting because,

Speaker 1 and follow along, it's not one of those questions. But Charles Barkley, again, you're not watching the last dance, but Charles Barkley had a moment in the last dance where

Speaker 1 MJ outplays him in the finals game. The Bulls beat the Suns, and he said, That was the first time in my life where I was like, Shit,

Speaker 1 there's a guy better at basketball than me. And you never felt that.

Speaker 6 Hey, look here.

Speaker 6 Let me tell you something.

Speaker 6 Did I go, did I say this right here?

Speaker 6 Is that person more talented than me?

Speaker 6 Absolutely. I've said that,

Speaker 1 right?

Speaker 6 I can tell you,

Speaker 6 I'm going to tell you three guys that have more talent than Carl Malone:

Speaker 6 Chris Weber,

Speaker 6 Derek Coleman,

Speaker 1 Charles Barkley.

Speaker 6 More talent.

Speaker 6 More talent.

Speaker 6 But

Speaker 6 they did not work me.

Speaker 6 I will never use the word he was better than me. More talented is different.

Speaker 1 Right?

Speaker 6 I look and say,

Speaker 6 I can't do his position and he can't do mine.

Speaker 6 Because everything is numbers. I was a four.
You was a two, you was a one, three, right, and five.

Speaker 6 I can look at them and say,

Speaker 6 I might give your position,

Speaker 6 the big guys, I might give your position a try. I won't mess with that.
But I dare you to come give mine a try.

Speaker 6 So more

Speaker 6 talent? Yes.

Speaker 6 Worked harder? No.

Speaker 6 If I die working hard,

Speaker 6 so be it.

Speaker 1 Irregardless of position,

Speaker 1 top five NBA players of all time. Carl Malone's list, you can't put yourself on there.
Top five NBA players of all time.

Speaker 6 Nope.

Speaker 6 That's unfair. That's a lame question.

Speaker 1 Well, I asked that because you did it once.

Speaker 1 You did do your top five and you didn't put MJ on it once. No.

Speaker 6 I will never give nobody a top five.

Speaker 1 Okay, number one. Okay, Mount Rushmore.
Only five. Why five?

Speaker 6 Okay. Two times five is team.
Starting five. Only other 15 on a roster there.
So, why are you just going to stop at five?

Speaker 1 Well, it's starting five.

Speaker 4 What about your top four?

Speaker 6 No.

Speaker 1 Three.

Speaker 6 How about another?

Speaker 4 Best player of all time.

Speaker 6 Unfair question.

Speaker 1 All right.

Speaker 4 Walk me through one of my favorite moments in NBA history.

Speaker 6 The best reporter, the best newscaster of all time.

Speaker 4 Jay Mariotti.

Speaker 1 Walter Cronkite. I have your top five that you gave once.
Wilt, John Stockton, LeBron, Oscar, and Pippen.

Speaker 6 Okay.

Speaker 1 And

Speaker 1 you left MJ off.

Speaker 6 Yes.

Speaker 1 I like it.

Speaker 4 Walk me through one of my favorite moments in NBA history. It was 1998, Finals Game 6.
You and Rodman get into a wrestling match on the court. It looked like it was a WWE match.

Speaker 4 You guys went halfway down the court, knocking each other over. Walk me through what you remember about that sequence.

Speaker 6 Uh, uh, just what you said:

Speaker 6 we were getting ready for the bash of the beach, yes,

Speaker 6 in San Diego. We'll just get ready for that.

Speaker 1 Yes,

Speaker 1 how

Speaker 1 awesome was it to give Rodman a stunner at the bash of the beach?

Speaker 6 Uh, it'd be, first of all, a diamond cutter.

Speaker 1 Yeah, well, it was kind of a diamond cutter, but kind of a stunner. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, wrestle.
Whoa, yeah,

Speaker 6 I trained. No, you gotta put them together.

Speaker 1 You didn't do that. No, you didn't do the whole thing.

Speaker 6 Yeah, that's not a stunner.

Speaker 1 You did. It was a combo of a diamond cutter stunner.
I'm telling you.

Speaker 1 Oh, come on.

Speaker 6 No, sir. I trained for that.
You did. How do you know? How are you going to tell me?

Speaker 1 Because I love wrestling and I remember watching it.

Speaker 6 You didn't love it more than me. Okay, let me take you back.

Speaker 1 That might be true.

Speaker 6 How about Bill Watts? The great kabuki

Speaker 6 the nature boy witch flare okay

Speaker 6 the just rose all time yes what okay the bud erics so you're not a wrestling fan i'm the wrestling fan i wrestle i live my dreams so don't try to say you're a wrestling fan i ain't how awesome was being able to get into a ring though with hulk hogan and diamond dallas pitch

Speaker 6 It was like the most amazing experience ever for me. I absolutely loved it.
Absolutely loved it. Love that brotherhood.
Like to this day, if I go to a live event, it's a brotherhood that's amazing.

Speaker 6 And

Speaker 6 it was like a dream come true.

Speaker 6 It's a different experience to be able to draw the fans right into your. Oh, it's just, it's amazing.
It was like a highlight of my life.

Speaker 1 It really was. Yeah, it was every wrestling fan's dream.
And you looked good. You looked real good.
You looked strong.

Speaker 4 You picked Hulk Hogan up like he was a sack of potatoes.

Speaker 6 No, no. Hey, look, it's amazing because

Speaker 6 they taught me everything. Like, like when we ate lunch, we ate lunch in the ring and we rehearsed what we, what we was doing, how it was going to go, what I do.

Speaker 6 When I'm looking at Dallas, when he did, you know, we ate in the ring and that's what we did all day long for three straight weeks.

Speaker 6 Because the first thing I told them was, I want to look real when I'm doing it.

Speaker 1 I want to be real when I'm doing it. Yep.

Speaker 6 So to be able to train and get that part of it, it just truly, man, it's just awesome. It's unbelievable.

Speaker 4 So, yeah, it sounds like you love wrestling. Do you still love basketball? Like, when's the last time you played basketball?

Speaker 1 I don't know.

Speaker 1 Brilliant.

Speaker 4 It's been that long.

Speaker 6 10 years, 20 years?

Speaker 1 Damn.

Speaker 4 Is there a part of you that misses just dunking on somebody?

Speaker 6 No, what I miss the most is the camaraderie in the locker room. I miss that.
I miss that so much.

Speaker 6 When I dunk,

Speaker 6 it's a good feeling to dunk, but I never

Speaker 6 looked to dunk on nobody to embarrass them.

Speaker 1 So, no,

Speaker 1 I wasn't into that, you know.

Speaker 6 I wasn't a high flyer or nothing like that. You know, everybody talking about what's your first,

Speaker 6 I said, enough to dunk.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 4 Same.

Speaker 1 It's all relevant.

Speaker 1 You're not going to watch any of the last dance, correct? None of it.

Speaker 6 No, man. What you got a fetish with the last dance?

Speaker 1 Well, I mean, it's in the news. I was just curious.

Speaker 6 The coronavirus in the news, too.

Speaker 1 He'll talk about that. True, we can talk about that.

Speaker 1 Do you think, though, that like, will there someday, if someone comes up to you and says, we want to do a documentary about the Stockton and Malone jazz, would you be in for that?

Speaker 1 No,

Speaker 1 really?

Speaker 1 Really?

Speaker 1 Why?

Speaker 1 Why?

Speaker 6 Because

Speaker 6 I'm a blue-blooded American, and I say I don't want to do it.

Speaker 4 Damn it, I don't have to do it.

Speaker 1 Okay. I just think that

Speaker 1 your place in NBA history should be celebrated.

Speaker 6 Somebody else could talk about it.

Speaker 1 So, you know,

Speaker 6 it don't have to be celebrated, you know. It ain't about me.
It's about somebody else. I was blessed and fortunate enough.

Speaker 6 I thank my grandparents and my parents for my DNA that I could pay a long time.

Speaker 6 I turn out pretty decent, I think.

Speaker 6 And

Speaker 6 enough saying, I don't.

Speaker 1 Why?

Speaker 6 The people that need to know about Carl Malone or care know about him, good or bad, or indifferent.

Speaker 6 I don't think nobody lining up out there wants to know about Carl Malone, so why bore with that? Let's watch the Tiger King or some like that.

Speaker 1 Oh, did you like that? Do you like the Tiger King? Yeah, I do.

Speaker 1 Do you have any of the old Carl Malone uh mailman posters in your house? That was such an awesome poster.

Speaker 1 Oh, in the weight room.

Speaker 6 Okay, we got some stuff out there in the weight room. Yeah, good.

Speaker 1 Yeah, good. How much do you bench right now?

Speaker 1 I don't know.

Speaker 6 It just depends on if he's working at a particular time. You know what I'm saying?

Speaker 4 You just go in there and you see what's on the bench and then you just lift that up.

Speaker 1 Sound like you're too much of a coward to tell us a number.

Speaker 6 I don't know. Just enough.

Speaker 1 Oh, okay. So if I say, hey, Carl, I got 300 pounds on this bar.
Can you lift it?

Speaker 6 Maybe.

Speaker 1 I wouldn't. If we were in the same room, I would never would ask you that question, by the way.
Oh, yeah. I believe you could do it.

Speaker 6 What happened one day?

Speaker 6 You got to look at y'all room. Y'all kicking that shit up?

Speaker 1 No, not really. We got a bench press right here.
You wouldn't know about that.

Speaker 1 You didn't even know what this was. You've never seen a bench press in your life.

Speaker 6 Hold up. I see some beer over to the left.

Speaker 1 What the heck, y'all about that? They're actually Bud Lights elters. I love Bud Lights.

Speaker 4 Yeah, this is our berserker bunker.

Speaker 1 Is that a guitar right there? What?

Speaker 6 Is that a guitar right there?

Speaker 1 Yeah, we got a guitar.

Speaker 4 We got everything a man could need in this room.

Speaker 1 We got Bud Lights,

Speaker 1 attire. Hold on, hold on.
Is that a Chris painting?

Speaker 1 Yeah, we got painting. Oh, you want to see this? Wait, hey, guys.

Speaker 4 We got Coach O right here. You'll like this.

Speaker 6 You're Coach O, guys. Y'all got a whole lot of, y'all got a whole lot of shit going on right now.

Speaker 4 How about this? That's Coach O.

Speaker 1 How about that?

Speaker 1 Old school Coach O

Speaker 1 show kicked their ass,

Speaker 4 were you at the national championship championship game this year?

Speaker 6 Yeah, I went to the game.

Speaker 4 What was that like? What was your experience like at that game?

Speaker 6 Oh, like out of body.

Speaker 1 Like,

Speaker 1 like

Speaker 6 that's off my bucket list. Like,

Speaker 6 over the top.

Speaker 6 What's the odds?

Speaker 6 On this year, this particular, last time they won the national championship was in New Orleans.

Speaker 6 They had to play their asses off to get back to New Orleans. 45 minutes up the road.
My son was on the strict conditioning coaching there. So I got, you know, he got a ring.

Speaker 6 So it was just, I couldn't even explain it. It's just unbelievable.

Speaker 1 Like, really.

Speaker 6 It's unbelievable.

Speaker 1 Yeah, you remember the clip after the game? Odell Beckham tried to pantomime backing Carl down in the post, and then you just sent his shot like fucking 10 rows up.

Speaker 6 It'd be like me going out there and trying to get the football from,

Speaker 1 I don't know,

Speaker 1 somebody

Speaker 6 at the top of their profession.

Speaker 6 It'd be like me come out there and tell him,

Speaker 6 get out of the way, little fellow. Let me run this rock for you.
And he zoomed by past my ass, right?

Speaker 6 Well, the same.

Speaker 6 And he wasn't low enough anyway.

Speaker 1 Yeah, he wasn't. No, he wasn't.

Speaker 6 I'm a 56-year-old old man, gray beard. He wasn't low enough.
And he needed some more rocks. No,

Speaker 6 he needed some steel balls in his pocket because he didn't have enough ass back there.

Speaker 4 Right. Yes.
He had given all the money out of his back pocket.

Speaker 4 He wasn't heavy enough at the time. We're about to interview Joe Burrow in a second.

Speaker 6 Look at me.

Speaker 1 No, that wasn't no money.

Speaker 6 He wasn't giving out real money. Oh, yeah.

Speaker 4 Fake money. It was fake money.
It was fake money. It had his face on it.

Speaker 1 It was Monopoly. His Monopoly money.

Speaker 4 Yeah. We're about to interview Joe Burrow.
Do you have any questions that you would like us to ask Joe Burrow on your behalf? The Carl Malone question of the day?

Speaker 6 Yes.

Speaker 6 Ask Joe, what would he like for us to send that our cigar?

Speaker 6 Our cigar.

Speaker 6 He got a limited, he got a lifetime supplier of our cigar. That was our cigar he was smoking in the next championship game.

Speaker 6 So just tell him what he wants us to send him to.

Speaker 6 And we'll send him there. But I'm going to say this.

Speaker 6 Like

Speaker 6 the young man that do those interviews and everybody, oh God, too good. No, that's it.
That's that young man. That's him, and that's his character.
That's who he is.

Speaker 6 He's a great young man, and he got some awesome parents as well.

Speaker 1 So, uh,

Speaker 6 I'll uh be watching uh Cincinnati because of him.

Speaker 1 Yes, absolutely, absolutely. Um, well, this has been awesome.
Thank you so much, Carl. We really appreciate it.

Speaker 6 So, what we out of time?

Speaker 1 No, we keep going.

Speaker 1 I have a list of MJ questions I don't think you're going to answer.

Speaker 6 Okay, well, you don't need to be talking then.

Speaker 1 Carl, thank you so much. This has been awesome.
We got to jump to the Joe Burrow interview, but this has been a ton of fun. We'd love to have you back on anytime.

Speaker 1 Thank you to your son, too, for sending all this rum. It's delicious rum.
We appreciate it.

Speaker 4 And we'll get the, we'll ask Joe where he wants those cigars to be sent.

Speaker 1 Hey,

Speaker 6 tell Joe I'll be wearing this jersey this year.

Speaker 1 We will be. Here we go.
All right.

Speaker 1 Thanks so much, Carl. Thanks, buddy.

Speaker 6 All righty. Hey, Luke.

Speaker 1 Appreciate it. Take care.

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Speaker 1 Okay, let's get some segments and a great Mount Rushmore coming up. That's going to get a little nostalgic for everyone, but before we do that, PFT, you have a drunk idea.

Speaker 4 I do. I think it's actually a very, very helpful drunk idea to help us bring sports back and get a sense of normalcy going right now.
And the solution's been in front of our eyes for a long time.

Speaker 4 I didn't put two and two together until last night.

Speaker 4 I was having a little Zoom happy hour with a friend, and they were talking about getting Vegas up and running and what they're going to have to do for that, and essentially, like, dip every chip into bleach, essentially, to clean it off before every time somebody touches it.

Speaker 4 It made me think about just like the most powerful disinfectant thing known to man, the water cup in beer pong.

Speaker 4 So, we've had the solution in front of us our whole lives.

Speaker 1 Do you say most or least?

Speaker 4 Most. So,

Speaker 4 it's scientifically proven that if you fill a red solo cup up two-thirds of the way with room-temperature water and then get everybody in the party to dip their fingers in it over the course of the night, no one's getting sick.

Speaker 4 If that ball hits the ground, you dip it in the water cup, you're good to go. Pro sports should adapt, they should have a water cup.

Speaker 4 Like in basketball, it goes into the stand, some random touches it, boom, just dunk the basketball into like a garbage can filled with room temperature hose water. Boom.

Speaker 4 I don't know why we haven't thought of this already, but I feel like maybe just everybody needs to carry around their own water cup.

Speaker 4 So you hand your debit card to the cashier or the waitress, you get it back, boom, dip it in your water cup, put it back in your wallet, you're good to go.

Speaker 1 Okay, can I ask a real question? Because obviously that would never work, but I like the idea. I like the thought process.
Why wouldn't it work?

Speaker 1 I mean, it's

Speaker 1 the grossest thing in the world. Yeah, it's everyone.
Everyone gets sick from it.

Speaker 4 Yeah,

Speaker 4 really sickly drunk.

Speaker 1 Has a sick time. Why don't you, you know, those

Speaker 1 ultra, like, what are they? Infrared lights that basically can clean your iPhone? You know those things? Have you seen those?

Speaker 4 The tanning bed things?

Speaker 1 Yeah, they're like mini tanning beds for your iPhone. You're supposed to put them in and then like you zap your iPhone.
Why don't we do that for the whole world?

Speaker 4 Just build a giant ozone layer out of the UV rays.

Speaker 1 Yeah, or like, I don't know.

Speaker 1 I mean, just something to like cook it off. I don't know.
How about this? Yeah.

Speaker 4 We keep talking about the hole in the ozone layer. Why don't we just get rid of the entire ozone?

Speaker 4 Like, if everyone goes outside and we just light styrofoam on fire 24 hours a day and just burn aerosol into the sky, I'm pretty sure we'll just nuke the ozone layer within a matter of weeks, and then all the extra infrared is going to take care of the virus.

Speaker 1 When I was like eight years old, and um, like the ozone layer depletion started to become like kind of a hot in the streets topic around the world, I remember I was like, dude, just put ozone in an aerosol can and spray it up into the sky.

Speaker 1 I'm pretty sure I solved that and

Speaker 1 no one's done it. Like, why not?

Speaker 4 Let's just get a lab going and instead of developing chemicals and stuff, we just work on developing more ozone.

Speaker 1 Just spray ozone. It's like a spray-on.
You basically, like, okay, well, there's a huge hole right over China right now because of all their factories. All right.
We'll put someone up in a fucking

Speaker 1 spaceship with a huge aerosol can and they just spray it on like flex seal for the ozone.

Speaker 1 I love love that. Why not? Yeah.

Speaker 1 That was eight-year-old Nate. Think about how much smarter I've gotten since then.

Speaker 4 I mean, if there's a lack of something in the air, just put more of it up there.

Speaker 1 Exactly. It will just catch itself up there.

Speaker 1 The existing ozone will stop the spray on ozone to create a double ozone.

Speaker 4 I did used to love that, though, like at a party in college.

Speaker 4 You'd be over at your friend's house, and they own like six dogs that all live in the living room, and you miss a shot in beer pong, and it goes on the ground, and it picks up just like clumps clumps and clumps of weird shit and like old pizza crust.

Speaker 4 You just dump it, you dunk it in the solo cup for about a half second, shake it off, maybe rub it on your shirt, which is also dirty, and you're good to go.

Speaker 1 And not only that, but play on the same cups all night that everyone in the party's been playing on.

Speaker 1 So then when you get on the table, you're just drinking out of the same cups that everyone else has been drinking out of. But you're like, oh, but let's make sure we practice hygiene with the balls.

Speaker 4 Yeah, it's chat immunity.

Speaker 4 It's the best type of immunity that you can have.

Speaker 1 It actually probably,

Speaker 1 I mean, in college, you probably have the highest level of immunity.

Speaker 1 It's similar to taking the New York City subways. Like, I'm convinced that if you take the subways every day,

Speaker 1 you are immune to almost every disease in the world.

Speaker 1 Yes,

Speaker 1 and then it all proved to be untrue when coronavirus was like way more in New York than anywhere else. But you got

Speaker 4 absolutely backflip. For a while, it seemed like we were smart, all living on top of each other and spitting on everyone.
But it turns out it wasn't great.

Speaker 4 But can you get herpes from a Red Solo Cup that you share?

Speaker 1 Yeah, why not?

Speaker 4 So that's why, like, everyone in the world has it. If you've played one game of beer pong against one person, then you've played beer pong against every person they've played against.

Speaker 1 Yes, and we all have herpes from it.

Speaker 3 Are you guys not in Dana's beer pong tournament?

Speaker 1 Yeah, we are. We're at it.
Oh,

Speaker 3 those are some

Speaker 3 suspect rankings.

Speaker 1 It's well, it's also, I mean,

Speaker 1 I like that we're we're just a parody of ourselves. Like, everyone's like, barstool sports, frat boy sports.
Well, you know how we prove that wrong?

Speaker 1 We have a beer pong tournament for our entire staff. Oh, hell yeah.
Men,

Speaker 1 I'm pumped. Like, I don't even give a fuck.
I know that there's people who will think that and make fun of us. I don't give a fuck.
Because, guess what? Beer pong's fun. Sue me.

Speaker 4 Yeah, I'm ready to do it. I'm ready to do it, absolutely.
And I'll be pissed if you're stuck going after the fact.

Speaker 1 I'll be pissed if I lose. Like, I will be very upset if I lose.

Speaker 4 I'm going to be calling elbows on people.

Speaker 1 Yeah, it's going to be interesting, though. I don't really know how I'm going to play or where I'm going to play, but yeah.

Speaker 3 Right, I don't know what the regulations are because I don't even have a table for this, but

Speaker 4 what's your seed, Hank?

Speaker 3 I'm a six-seed, and Dana's a one-seed, even though the last beer pong tournament he played and he lost in the first round.

Speaker 1 I'm a nine-seed, and Marty Mush is like an eight-seed, and Marty says he's like the best ping pong player ever or beer pong player ever.

Speaker 3 No, if it's ping-pong, we know it'd be good.

Speaker 4 Hank got absolutely smoked in soup pong, so that probably affected your ranking.

Speaker 3 That's true.

Speaker 1 I forgot about that. That's very true.

Speaker 1 And gave me that look, like, why is the cup not going in? Like, is there beer in that cup, bro? Is there beer in that cup?

Speaker 3 I mean, there was questions that needed to be asked.

Speaker 1 We should actually do that, put a put a tickler on this tickler file. We should do a Mount Rushmore of dudes, of beer pong dudes.

Speaker 4 Okay, there's.

Speaker 1 No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, not right now.

Speaker 4 Save bounce.

Speaker 1 Bro, we have nothing to talk about.

Speaker 1 Do not ruin it right now.

Speaker 4 I've been on this table all night.

Speaker 1 Okay, stop. All right, let's do our real Mount Rushmore.
Today would have been the start of Grit Week. It's very sad.

Speaker 4 We were actually

Speaker 1 an unbelievable grit week ready for the people we're going to do. SEC West.
We're going to see Coach O again. We're going to see Mike Leach.
We were going to see maybe the Kiffin train.

Speaker 3 The craziest part is that we hadn't even really planned it. We just said that was kind of our plan, but we didn't even get close enough to actually have to make those plans concrete.

Speaker 1 Right, right. So we have to say

Speaker 3 we can say it's true. Yeah.

Speaker 1 No, we would have.

Speaker 4 We definitely would have done it. But it's also disappointing that we didn't get to cancel any plans because we never got far enough with our making plans to actually have the plan.

Speaker 1 Yeah, so it sucks. Um, it sucks, sucks, sucks.
But I thought uh a good Mount Rushmore for today's show would be for us to do a Mount Rushmore of our favorite grit week moments.

Speaker 1 Uh, a little nostalgia, a little memory lane. This would have been grit week five, so we have four grit weeks we can go off of.
Hank, you have the first pick. Why don't you uh kick it?

Speaker 1 And by the way, it's grit week moments. It can be

Speaker 1 podcasts. It can be just traveling.
It can be stories that people might not all know. Whatever it is, favorite grit week moments.

Speaker 3 So, my number one, it's an easy one because it's actually, I was doing this last night before I even knew we were doing this, but

Speaker 3 I'd ingested a little hot leaf, and I was like, it's crazy that we did a song with Sony Digital. We did a rap song, Drink Print.

Speaker 3 I just listened to it and was just laughing at how funny that whole experience was.

Speaker 3 It's something that we knew we were going to Atlanta and we had a day off, and I was talking to this guy from Sony. He was like, Oh, you want to do an interview with a Boogie with the hoodie?

Speaker 3 We were like, Sure, thinking we were just going to do an interview in the van. And then a couple days before, he switched it to like, Do you guys want to do a song with Sonny Digital?

Speaker 3 And it was just so random, and it came out so good, and it's still like a banger to this day. So, that's my number one, easy number one, drink paint.

Speaker 1 Yep, that's a great one. Good choice.

Speaker 4 That's a great one. Good choice.

Speaker 4 My number one, I had that on there too, Hank, because that was an amazing moment. Great afternoon.

Speaker 4 My number one is going to be when we were at LSU and we were sitting down in the room with all the tiger stripes and shit in it, waiting for Coach O.

Speaker 4 And then we heard Coach O walk around the corner, and he just goes,

Speaker 4 Oh, seamless here, Hank, dinner's here.

Speaker 1 Yeah, dinner's here, chicken parm.

Speaker 1 Oh, damn, it's could have guessed that,

Speaker 4 but then Coach O walks around the corner and

Speaker 1 steak and cheese or chicken parm, and he, yeah, can't go wrong. Pizza,

Speaker 1 he goes, Hey, boys, how are you doing?

Speaker 4 And just hearing that, it like made me stand up. My instant reaction was like, Hey, I have to stand up now.
I'm at attention. Coach O's here.
Let's let's do this.

Speaker 4 So, that for me, I think, was my easy number one. Just hearing Coach O's voice in person for the first time and catching his contagious enthusiasm.

Speaker 1 Okay, my number one. I'm surprised that my number one's still on there.
I think it's one of the most memorable moments we've ever had. It's the

Speaker 1 milk mile, nut tap milk mile in Indianapolis. One of the funniest, just spontaneous, dumb, like the mix of dumb ideas turning into even dumber ideas, turning into

Speaker 1 just a terrible idea of hitting each other in the nuts. We had to actually ban nut tapping after PFT full, full, like closed fist punched me in the balls like about six months after that.

Speaker 1 So we had to ban it for life. But that was the peak of it, and it was just guys being dudes.
It's like kind of a mini jackass just broke out, just puking and doing random shit.

Speaker 1 So that was my easy number one. Very funny.

Speaker 4 It was awesome. And it was right after, I think we had Skyline Chili for the meal right before that.

Speaker 4 So we were throwing up milk and Skyline Chili and running a mile and hitting each other in the nuts.

Speaker 1 Yes, I actually had, I put in some of my honorable mentions, I put worst grit week moments and

Speaker 1 one of the worst grit weeks moments to me was Grit Week one when you tried Skyline Chili for the first time and then you convinced yourself you liked it, but fake that you didn't.

Speaker 1 Big fan.

Speaker 1 Okay, my number two is going to be Grit Week 2

Speaker 1 when we interviewed Jim Harbaugh. Not only was it one of our biggest names at that time, that we were going after, it was also just like we were trying really, really hard.

Speaker 1 I remember I had texts out to like six different

Speaker 1 people in the Michigan facility, bothering all of them. We finally get in there.
Harbaugh comes out. He cut himself shaving right before the interview.

Speaker 1 So we got super lucky that we had about 10-15 minutes where we just got to shoot the shit with him, warm up to him. And then we sat down.
We had the human body craves contact.

Speaker 1 We had the time when PFT asked him, so you've, you've like loved football since you were, like, I think you said a year, and his brain just stopped. And he's like, no, no, no, no, no.

Speaker 1 Like, I've been in love with football since I was six years. years old, talking about milk, drinking milk with him.
Just an awesome moment, wearing khakis, the whole thing. Yep.

Speaker 4 Him talking about the last time he got into a fight was at a Binnegan's like five years ago.

Speaker 4 Yeah, that was in that interview, too.

Speaker 1 Yes, that was a huge, huge deal. So I feel like

Speaker 1 that was a big breakthrough moment for us as well. So that would be my number two.

Speaker 4 Okay. Those are two good ones.
I'm going to go for my second one. I'm going to go with last year on Grit Week out in the Boo, out in Malibu, California,

Speaker 4 hanging with Zach Efron in the back of the van and doing Dunkirk with him. Doing like a minute and a half long rendition of the plot of Dunkirk.

Speaker 4 Because at that point, I think that's when Zach really started to understand what we were doing. And he got into it.

Speaker 4 And you could see him like flip a switch, like go from interview mode into, okay, I'm in Zach Efron creative mode. And just like doing the sounds of the voices.

Speaker 4 He's like, I'm the kid from one direction.

Speaker 1 Oh, I'm a little cunt.

Speaker 4 Like that whole thing. It was amazing.
And it was even funnier on video, too. Yep, that's a great pick.
I had that on my list as well.

Speaker 1 Hank, you have two.

Speaker 1 I will go Grit Week one.

Speaker 3 This is kind of similar to Big Cat. This was like, you know, I mean, this was like our first trip together, really.
Grit week one was.

Speaker 3 And we didn't really know if Rob Ryan was going to come on, so we just parked the bus in the Bills' parking lot. We did the video where we jumped through tables.

Speaker 3 That was funny. And then Rob Ryan ended up coming through with beer.
Mm-hmm.

Speaker 1 And basically was like, I want to hang out with you guys.

Speaker 3 Oh, and to go off of that, this will be a combined number two, but when we were on the way back from Buffalo, when the car, remember the car was driving by and threw us a drive-by beer throw? Yes.

Speaker 1 Yes.

Speaker 3 That was great. Those are great.
I don't know.

Speaker 3 The Great Week One just feels different just because it was just so, we were still so new.

Speaker 1 We were so young. We were the only people

Speaker 3 driving. We were driving the bus.
Like, I had to drive the bus, empty the bus.

Speaker 3 Like, we didn't really have the infrastructure at Barcelona that we do now where it's like people are, you know, we have different people doing different jobs.

Speaker 3 It was like we were dealing with the ads. We were dealing with everything.
So it was just a whole, it was a shit show, but it was fun.

Speaker 4 It was so fun. And also, that's just the entire story.

Speaker 3 And we actually went to the Indy Derby. Like, that was a real life thing.

Speaker 4 Indy 500, yeah. It's just being in Buffalo in general.
Like, the wings, the people that were handing us beers, diving through the table, hanging out with Rex or with Rob Bryan. And you're right.

Speaker 4 When he stepped foot on that bus, he was like, I am considering quitting my job as a football coach and just going where the RV goes.

Speaker 1 All right, good pick, Hank.

Speaker 3 And then I think this was, I don't know if this was two or three. I think it was two if it was was the Jim Harbor year, but tornado chasing with Buda Ben.

Speaker 1 Yep, that's two.

Speaker 1 Yeah. That was on the way to Cincinnati for Andy Dalton.
So funny. Buda Ben wanted to cry.

Speaker 3 Literally wanted to cry. One of the hardest.
That was just like an out-of-body experience. That was just so, so, so, so, so funny.

Speaker 1 He threatened to call his mom on me. Yeah, no, he was like calling his mom, like giving her his last wishes, like, you know, please remember me.

Speaker 3 Like, we're about to die.

Speaker 1 If you keep going towards this tornado, I'm going to call my mom. And I was like, what is your mom going to do? Arrest me?

Speaker 4 What he didn't realize was we had the weather app pulled up on our phone. We saw that we were driving right between the two tornadoes.
If we had stopped, then it was going to be more dangerous.

Speaker 4 I think I reported a tornado on Twitter to the weather service, and they said,

Speaker 4 where was it located? And I said, the sky.

Speaker 4 And then they got mad at me.

Speaker 4 I think they blocked me.

Speaker 1 Yeah, that was great. Great pick.

Speaker 4 Had that as well. My next one, I'm going to go with

Speaker 4 Grit Week one,

Speaker 4 talking punch for about an hour with Jim Tressel.

Speaker 4 That was another one of those moments where it was like we didn't even know what we were doing that day. We just knew that we were going to Youngstown, maybe seeing Coach Polini.

Speaker 4 Didn't know if he was going to like us or not.

Speaker 1 He didn't.

Speaker 1 He didn't. Didn't like PFT.

Speaker 3 That was one of the, like, I'll never forget it. Like, he was staring through your soul during that interview.
Yeah. Oh, yeah.

Speaker 1 I felt awkward recording it. Yeah.

Speaker 1 He liked you by the end of it.

Speaker 4 He liked me by the end of it. But my look going into it, he was like, who's this hippie that's here to talk to me?

Speaker 4 But yeah, the Trestle interview when he was wearing the sweater vest, and we're sitting at the table, he's just literally talking about punts for an hour.

Speaker 1 That's a good one. I had that one on that list, too.
All right, my last two, I will go with

Speaker 1 becoming best friends with Tom Creen on Grit Week two: the Vampire Bats, the Vampire Bats,

Speaker 1 having him just willingly meet us in a, what was it, a party favor,

Speaker 1 party city, party city parking lot.

Speaker 1 And then obviously, obviously we had him. We visited with him again in Grit Week 4.
We're Grit Week 3. So he's been back-to-back.
But yeah, that was awesome. Really cool to

Speaker 1 meet someone that you kind of made fun of on the internet and then become friends with them. And then the Vampire Bats thing is great.

Speaker 1 And then my last one, I'll go with the Titus and Rasillo life episode, Grit Week 4.

Speaker 1 So that was one episode. Oh, what's that face, Hank?

Speaker 4 Hank's wincing.

Speaker 3 It happened during

Speaker 1 Grit Week? Okay, you want me me to do a different pick?

Speaker 1 Okay, I'll do a different pick. That's fine.
That's fine. I can do a different peak.
I'll do a different pick. You're right.
That's technicality.

Speaker 1 I'll go with then my last pick.

Speaker 1 I'll go Marone and

Speaker 1 Jeans Underwater Jeans contest in the Jaguars pool.

Speaker 3 That was fun. Yeah.

Speaker 4 It was so hot out there, too. I don't know how people survive in Jacksonville.
It was so hot. 99 degrees, 99% humidity, just baking in the sun.

Speaker 1 So hot.

Speaker 4 That's a good pick. My last one is going to be the Dan

Speaker 4 interview where we went to Dan's house and signed an NDA with Dan saying that we weren't allowed to talk about what a piece of shit misogynist he was because he was a piece of shit during the interview.

Speaker 4 And then later on, his people hit us up. They're like, hey, you can't air this.
And you signed an NDA and he's going to sue you. And he's a piece of shit.

Speaker 4 So feel free to bleep out as much of that as you need to to keep us legally covered. But that's going to be my fourth part.

Speaker 1 Yeah, way to get us all sued for a lot of money there. I disavow PFT's.

Speaker 3 We'll just bleep his last name so people won't be able to tell. Oh, yeah.

Speaker 1 Appreciate that. It could just be any Dan.
Yeah, okay.

Speaker 1 All right, your last pick, Hank.

Speaker 3 I mean, PFT,

Speaker 3 I'm in shock. Oh, wait, do you still have one more?

Speaker 1 No, PFT doesn't have to be.

Speaker 4 Why are you in shock, Hank?

Speaker 3 You didn't pick the Capitals and Lightning?

Speaker 1 Oh,

Speaker 4 it was a great one. But I feel like that was, it's not for everybody, you know? Like, as a Capitals fan, it was amazing.

Speaker 3 Oh, so you're panting. Yeah, what the fuck?

Speaker 4 The great way of doing it.

Speaker 1 Well, I try not to be self-sufficient. Also,

Speaker 4 if I'm being serious here, I was coming down off of not a great day previously.

Speaker 4 Dealing with my brother. And so, you know, it was great, and it was awesome to advance to the Stanley Cup.
But at the same time, my eyes were on the big prize out there, and that's the cup.

Speaker 4 I'm not going to pop champagne after winning a game that doesn't get us to the Stanley Cup final.

Speaker 3 All right, well, I'm not going to say that one because I was just surprised that you didn't.

Speaker 3 But the Nate shrug that came out of that when you guys got in the fight with the the guy after it was all time, still makes me laugh.

Speaker 1 And me, I said to PFT as I left, I was like, hey, Nate's going to get slapped because I left with like three minutes left because I didn't want to, like, it was their moment.

Speaker 1 And then PFD texted me like 20 minutes later, he's like, yeah, Nate got slapped.

Speaker 4 And then right after the game was over, the people that were in front of us were, I guess, seasoned ticket holders, and they were pissed off at me because I was like cheering for the Capitals after they won.

Speaker 4 And the guy turns around and he's like, you know, if I were you, I'd get the fuck out of here. And I was like, why? I paid for this.
He's like, no, you didn't.

Speaker 4 You snuck down because we're in good seats. And I was like, no, no.

Speaker 4 This is where I'm sitting this whole game. And he, yeah, shout out to Seat Geek.
And the guy goes, what do you do for a job? How can you afford those seats?

Speaker 4 And I was like, I own a professional basketball team. And then he turns to his wife and they turn back at me.
I was like, why? What do you do? He goes, I own a professional basketball team too.

Speaker 4 And like, was just like totally lying and tried to cover for himself in front of his wife. It was a great punking.
It was wonderful.

Speaker 1 The

Speaker 1 sneaky, like, Tampa Bay Lightning have very hardo fans because we had the similar situation when the Blackhawks were in the Stanley Cup final

Speaker 1 in 2015. Yes, some dude followed me in the bathroom and like tried to tried to beat me up.
I was in full pads.

Speaker 1 So, I don't know what it is about Tampa Bay. They just, they get really upset.

Speaker 3 But my last one, though, I'll go with when we went to, I think we went to Blake Boral's house. He wasn't even there when we showed up.
He was like, just walk on inside.

Speaker 3 And then he had told the story about the bush light.

Speaker 3 And I don't even think, this is what was funny funny to me is that people don't even know we are at his house like we didn't make it known that we were staying at his house but someone just dropped happened to drop off beer at his house organically like they had heard the story and so like we just happened to be there when other people were dropping off bush lights at his house which was just a common occurrence i guess yeah blake was like we we hit up blake and we're like hey man we're about to be there and he's like oh dude i had to go out to dinner with my agent uh i left the door open for you guys and he came back like three hours later we just hung out in his house and wasn't that also like two months after his car got broken into, and he had all his shit stolen out of it, and now he's just like leaving his front door open?

Speaker 4 Yes.

Speaker 1 All right. Any other ones that I had, some of the honorable mentions I had is singing with Pacquiao in front of like 70 people in his entourage.

Speaker 3 Yeah, that was

Speaker 1 an all-time moment. That was very awkward.

Speaker 1 I thought we were going to get fucking killed.

Speaker 4 Hank emptying the tank of the gray water out of the RV for the first time.

Speaker 1 Yep. Hank

Speaker 1 staying at Dana Hogerson's house and partying there.

Speaker 3 Oh my god.

Speaker 1 Oh my god, that was brute until like five in the morning with Dana. Just the two of them were the last two up.
Like everyone had gone to sleep.

Speaker 3 I fucked up.

Speaker 3 Yeah, that was when we became best friends.

Speaker 1 Yeah, that's when you guys became best friends. That was a good time.

Speaker 4 Showed up at Bruce Arian's house at like 9 p.m. after he'd been out drinking beers and playing golf all day.
And then when we started interviewing,

Speaker 4 he did that GIF reaction where he turns around.

Speaker 1 Yes, yes.

Speaker 4 The one that he's famous for on the satellines, and he did it live, and it was amazing.

Speaker 1 Yes.

Speaker 1 Bro Sweet with Bo Polini.

Speaker 1 We got to bring back Bro Sweet, especially now that we're going to do the Dude Perfect. Remember, we're watching Dude Perfect documentary for Friday's documentary review.
Yes, you are, Hank.

Speaker 1 Hank, we're going to give you a quiz. I was going through old videos.
One of the low lights, I forgot about this, but we went to a, I don't know if PFT, you were there.

Speaker 1 I think you might have been doing, you weren't on the video.

Speaker 1 Maybe it was just you weren't on the video.

Speaker 1 So it was Grit Week one, i think a cleveland calves watch party at the quick and loans arena so they weren't playing yeah no no he lost his title he lost his wallet the year after

Speaker 1 no no you lost your wallet there the year after we went to a game we went to a game against the celtics no i left my wallet there i'm right i'm right no we did both yeah we did one i think both are true right

Speaker 1 he lost the wallet I thought no oh grit week one he lost a wallet grit week two we went to an actual game there a playoffs Yes. Yeah.

Speaker 3 And some dude gave me a sick, I forget who it was. He damned me.
He's like, yo, you want to Isaiah Thomas jersey? He gave me this sick, like, stitched jersey, and I lost it.

Speaker 3 That's on the list of, like, things I think about, like, what happened to that jersey because it was fresh.

Speaker 4 Well, grit week one,

Speaker 4 I was trying not to be on video as much as possible. So when we were doing the dude perfect stuff, I was just like right behind the camera.
And I was like, I don't want to be on camera at all.

Speaker 4 And then I shortly realized that literally everything that we do is on camera.

Speaker 1 Yeah, because we went to a fucking calves watch party and did it on camera and it was the worst experience like having to go see watch another watch another team that you don't like watch a play playoff game without them like on a tv at a stadium great week one is is when we spent this this is when dude perfect was funny but we spent a solid it was probably a full drive like maybe three to six hours just conspiring on how we were going to create burner accounts to take down dude perfect from within and it was like a whole thought-out plan it was so funny.

Speaker 3 And it was like too much work to follow through on, but the actual plotting of it was some of the funniest shit we've ever done.

Speaker 1 And we'd never do it. We'd never do that.

Speaker 3 Yeah, nothing ever came out of it.

Speaker 1 Yeah, right. No.

Speaker 4 Those plans definitely fell all the way off. Yeah.

Speaker 1 They could totally be comfortable.

Speaker 4 Didn't we go to the Minnesota State Fair at one point on Grit Week?

Speaker 1 No. No, that's

Speaker 1 the Training Camp Tour.

Speaker 1 Yeah, those do blend together. There are definitely moments where I'm like, wait, which one was that?

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 Everyone should go back and watch all the Grit Week videos because they're really well done, and there's full recaps for each one.

Speaker 4 That's just something later on this summer. It's unfortunate we can't do Grit Week right now.
If we can, if things are open, we'll make something happen.

Speaker 1 Sucks. It sucks.
It sucks. But Grit Week will be back someday.

Speaker 1 But yeah, it sucks. Okay, let's finish up.
We have Billy Football teaching us about the history of the Cover 2 defense. What's up, Billy?

Speaker 1 What's going on

Speaker 1 in the cave, the in the dungeon in the berserker bunker what do i call it bunker berserker berserker bunker so um

Speaker 7 the war with the trash pandas has been won uh there was it the the war ended at the massacre at the trash cans what we're just gonna leave it at that

Speaker 7 there's been a lot of you know emotional scars from it but we're just waiting on what wait did you kill the rackets questions just don't ask questions we're moving on turns out you cannot relocate trash pandas in certain states.

Speaker 1 Anyway, yeah,

Speaker 4 I've heard about that. Like in certain states, if you capture a rascal animal, you're not allowed to then keep it alive.
Like once you capture it, you've made your bed. There are no half measures.

Speaker 7 And it's illegal to keep them as pets too. So once you catch them, it's illegal to release them.
So it's like, what the fuck?

Speaker 1 And then you can't relocate them. Why don't you just drive them somewhere?

Speaker 1 It's illegal. It's illegal.
How would anyone find out? Well, I'm oh you document everything you you do as well so if i'm like releasing this raccoon

Speaker 1 like

Speaker 1 good luck

Speaker 7 these things i did not me personally did not i did not personally do it it was failed

Speaker 1 no we're just pete the tweak what happened happened what happened at the massacre at the trash cans dude not leave what happened at the massacre

Speaker 1 that's probably why pete is tweaking he got high and was like i can't believe i killed six raccoons today no it was a weed it was just bad weed we're not talking it was k2 we're not talking about what happened the battle was won the war was won enough about trash pandas let's talk about what your uh subject for the week is the cover two the tampa two the history of defense in the nfl

Speaker 7 you the floor is yours We're going to break down the Tampa 2. I was inspired to talk about the Tampa 2 after Big Cat threw a pick against Texas while he was playing with Texas Tech

Speaker 7 in a Tampa 2.

Speaker 7 He was a classic reason why they developed the Tampa 2, which is to bait

Speaker 7 ignorance people who don't know certain defenses into throwing into the middle and throw picks. Now, the Tampa 2 was

Speaker 7 developed, was

Speaker 6 used

Speaker 7 primarily, the first time it was really used was in 1975 by the Steel Curtain defense, which was developed by Bud Carson, Chuck Noll, but it was then taken by Tony Dungy and Monte Kiffen

Speaker 7 and popularized.

Speaker 4 I just, I love how you pronounce Monty Kiffin's name. Like, we're talking about Lane Kiffin's dad, but

Speaker 1 I think it's the, I think

Speaker 1 Monte Kiffen. Screwed up by Monte Ball.
Yeah. But that's even Monty.

Speaker 1 That's Monty Ball, too. What am I saying? I read the name.

Speaker 4 Keep going with Monte.

Speaker 1 I think it's Montezu.

Speaker 7 Well, the thing is, I read the name Monte, and the only Monte, the only time I've read that name, because I've never heard his name said on TV,

Speaker 7 right? Because I'm young and he's old. So I read it, I'm like, oh, Monte, like Montavious Bryant or something.

Speaker 4 Yeah, Monte Kiffin. I love it.

Speaker 1 Right.

Speaker 1 So

Speaker 7 Tony Dungy saw.

Speaker 7 So Tony Dungy was when this defense was being used, basically the concept that was first used in 1975 was an athletic linebacker drops back farther into coverage because they needed, it was at a time when football was moving away from ground and pound defense and ground and power running offenses, seen today in armies,

Speaker 7 you know,

Speaker 7 running offense, which is like they're so conservative that they won't even evolve their play style, which is crazy. So that sort of defense.

Speaker 6 You're talking shit about the troops?

Speaker 7 I'm not talking shit about the troops, but like, can you update your offense once in a while?

Speaker 1 Why? Like, it works.

Speaker 4 Like, are you serious?

Speaker 7 I mean, they have, I mean,

Speaker 6 bigger problems to deal with.

Speaker 4 Billy, did you just see the Madden Bowl this weekend? The dude won not using a single pass play the entire tournament what

Speaker 1 yes what a dink oh my god that's that's going back

Speaker 4 miserable way to play a video game he also had a quarterback that was a punter he had tres way playing quarterback so that he would just hand the ball off and he could use his salary cap on other positions kind of a genius move did we just did we just solve the cover two via madden right now well yeah i mean you just described jimmy garoppolo's job boom there we go damn that was that was mean that was mean i didn't mean that, Jimmy.

Speaker 1 If you're listening, I think you're actually a good quarterback.

Speaker 1 So

Speaker 1 yeah. What the hell was I talking about?

Speaker 4 We're talking about the cover too. So

Speaker 1 football's evolving.

Speaker 4 And Lane Kiffin and Monte were together.

Speaker 1 Yeah, Monte.

Speaker 1 Ruby Smith.

Speaker 7 Yeah, so we're.

Speaker 7 Football was evolving, so defense had to evolve. Offense was evolving.
Bill Walsh's West Coast offense was going nuts. Joe Montana, they were attacking between the linebackers and the safeties.

Speaker 7 And the linebackers were old guys like Dick Buttkiss, older guys who were just run stoppers, couldn't evolve fast enough to defeat the West Coast offense, which was picking apart linebackers and under the safeties.

Speaker 7 The defense's responses to this and Tony Dungess, Tony Dungy, saw how effective it was getting linebackers back into coverage.

Speaker 7 So what he did was, is the Tampa 2 was perfected under him and they got very athletic linebackers such as Jack Lambert to be able to cover between

Speaker 7 the line of scrimmage and where the safeties were playing. So

Speaker 7 it gets its namesake from the Tampa Bay Buccaneers who ran the systems from the mid-90s to the early 2000s. So how it works.

Speaker 3 Tampa Bay now.

Speaker 1 Tampa.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 7 So it's usually run out of a 4-3, which most cover twos are ran out of.

Speaker 7 They want to disguise it to make it look like a regular cover two to trick people like Big Cat into thinking that the middle is open.

Speaker 1 Got it.

Speaker 4 So, so with the middle linebacker, they want people to think that the middle linebacker's job is just come downhill and tackle as opposed to drop back and drop.

Speaker 7 Maybe just be a quarterback spy or track the running back one-on-one. So he's like, get the running back out of the backfield.
It's man.

Speaker 7 So they're trying to trick everyone into thinking it's a man coverage in cover two.

Speaker 7 Thus, then what happens is you need four down linemen, three linebackers, two safeties, two corners. So it's more of a shell.
So everything's played in front of you. So the safeties keep the

Speaker 7 all, like basically

Speaker 7 the ball's caught in front of the safety. So you need hard-hitting safeties.

Speaker 7 Guys that would be good in this position are like you need gang tackling safeties, such as Earl Thomas, and corners to keep the plays in front of them, like Ronnie Lott.

Speaker 4 Earl Thomas is really good at gang tackling. Tackling.
Gang wrestling and all that stuff.

Speaker 7 He's a team player.

Speaker 1 He's a team player.

Speaker 4 Band of Brothers.

Speaker 7 So the run game requires traffic to be spilled to the weak side linebacker. So you need a guy like Sean Lee, who's a very consistent tackler.

Speaker 7 James Harrison, I think, played on the weak side a couple of times. Just guys who can just make a tackle one-on-one, meet guys in the hole.
And then you need extremely athletic

Speaker 7 middle linebackers such as Brian Erlacher or Luke Keekly is an amazing Tampa 2 linebacker. just because he's so versatile and he's so long so that he can play big space and also you know,

Speaker 7 play the run game.

Speaker 7 Now, the reason why, you know, Bill Walsh, you can see the West Coast offense evolution throughout football in basically coming to like the epitome of what Bill Walsh started is Andy Reed, Andy Reid's in his coaching tree and what Kansas City did this year with Patrick Mahomes.

Speaker 7 That is like high-powered offensive air attack football. And basically the tamport two needs to evolve to get to a point to like keep up with this anyway

Speaker 7 i have a question yes billy do you think the tampa two sometimes can be described as a bend don't break like that you probably just break you probably just like slice him up down the field right well it's it's now the the response to the tampa two was sort of the dink and dunk underneath stuff that happens you run a mesh a lot of mesh plays where they sit instead of

Speaker 7 a lot of sitting in the zones, which has been breaking it up. And if I were you, Big Cat, that's how I would attack these zone cover twos that you keep throwing picks into.
You got to start

Speaker 7 running plays such as stick routes, ones where they're sitting in the gaps in the zones, as opposed to running these man-breaker plays that are getting a lot of picks and throwing, you're throwing late into the flat.

Speaker 1 Did you ever face Tampa 2 in high school?

Speaker 7 Yeah, I threw.

Speaker 7 The first time I saw Tampa 2 was my senior year, and I threw a pick into it, and I got super pissed, and I almost knocked myself out trying to tackle the guy because it was a linebacker yeah and he pissed me so then what did you do the next drive i looked out for the linebacker and we hit him underneath with a cushion we hit him underneath in the cushion but yeah

Speaker 6 anyway

Speaker 7 that's the tampa 2 okay would you like me to describe has a tampa 2 been updated since tampa because i feel like we don't hear as much about defenses running a tampa 2 right now We don't because they're more running cover sixes and disguising their coverages nowadays because the offensives have gotten so advanced that, you know, now people are playing cover four to one side of the field and cover two to the other side of the field.

Speaker 4 Why don't more defense scorners just get pissed off and run a punt block and just like get to the quarterback? That's why that's what I do sometimes. Yeah.

Speaker 7 Because then, because then you just, everyone's running go routes and you got one-on-one coverage and you got a guy who's got speed to the outside and is just like getting touchdowns because there's no safety over the top.

Speaker 4 Yeah, but it's punt block. You can get there.

Speaker 1 Billy, if you, if you had a, if you were the coach of a football team, what offense and defense would you run?

Speaker 7 I would definitely run an insane, you know, air attack offense. You know, more of like Mike Leach air raid than a West Coast.
Okay.

Speaker 7 Just where, you know, you got, you get a guy with a strong arm and just really make it basic for him to go through his reads and maybe even feed him his read before the play is even called so he doesn't have to think.

Speaker 7 He just goes one, two, three.

Speaker 7 You know, it looks at the first guy, looks at the second guy, and then works at the third guy, and he doesn't even have to think at all so that he's not, you know, going crazy and goes cavalier.

Speaker 4 I think that the NFL should actually do what the XFL did, which is allow the coaches to talk to their quarterbacks up until like when the ball snapped. That'd be awesome.

Speaker 4 Like, can you imagine Peyton Manning being an offensive coordinator up in the booth and telling like

Speaker 4 essentially playing Madden with live, with like a live quarterback down on the field being like, hey, you're going to throw the ball here?

Speaker 7 It would make it way more effective for good athletes who don't have the mental

Speaker 7 capability to grasp an offense and just have someone tell them what to do, because that's the hardest thing once you get on that field.

Speaker 1 Especially guys like that. Who are guys like that who just can't grasp it mentally?

Speaker 7 Let's take a guy with a super strong arm, very athletic, but might not, all the intangibles, but might not, you can't really measure what's in the brain as of yet. Josh Allen.

Speaker 1 Whoa.

Speaker 1 Oh, careful.

Speaker 1 Billy. Billy.
Careful.

Speaker 4 He has very high IQ.

Speaker 1 Careful, my friend.

Speaker 7 You can have a rocket arm, but you can't, you might have a rocket arm, but you might not have rocket science.

Speaker 1 If you want to fly a rocket, you have to know what you realize.

Speaker 7 I realize that I may have rocket science, but I may not have a rocket arm.

Speaker 1 You have the mind for it, you're saying? Well, I mean,

Speaker 1 maybe.

Speaker 7 I mean, my football career hasn't really panned out how I thought it would.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I'd say that's probably true.

Speaker 4 What you're talking about is Swag Kelly, essentially.

Speaker 7 Like, if you put Peyton Manning's brain into Swag Kelly's brain, we should have Swag Kelly to have someone talking in his brain 24-7 because he would probably have three Super Bowls right now.

Speaker 7 Just be like, oh,

Speaker 1 after the two years that he's been in the league?

Speaker 7 Well, just like have

Speaker 1 a guy talking to him.

Speaker 7 Like, don't go into that house, swag Kelly.

Speaker 1 Don't go into that house.

Speaker 7 Don't go back to the bar with an AK-47. Just don't.

Speaker 4 It's small mental errors that he needs to stay away from.

Speaker 1 Once he cleans those up.

Speaker 7 Yeah, once if you have a guy in it, like he needs to wear a headset at all times and just have someone telling him what to do and not to do.

Speaker 1 Yeah, yes.

Speaker 7 He's winning a Super Bowl.

Speaker 4 And ankle monitor.

Speaker 1 Ankle monitor as well. Yes.

Speaker 1 Okay, anything else, Billy? This has been very informative.

Speaker 7 Yeah.

Speaker 1 How much blood have you been giving, by the way? I've been giving, I gave, so I gave platelets the other day, but I've been giving too much blood and I've been passing out.

Speaker 7 Right. And I've been lying to the nurses of when I last gave because it turns out the only like I keep passing out because I'm giving too much blood.
Berserker Blood Cults going pretty strong.

Speaker 7 A lot of people are giving blood. It's actually really awesome.

Speaker 1 But you keep passing out.

Speaker 7 But I'm still giving blood. The only reason I'm passing out is because I'm giving too much blood.
Okay, maybe

Speaker 4 cut back on the blood donation by 10%.

Speaker 1 But give a week off. Give a week off.

Speaker 7 But then I'm a fraud. I got to just give all I got.

Speaker 1 No, dude. Actually, like, to be honest with you, a cult, being the leader of a cult, you actually shouldn't be doing what everyone else is doing.

Speaker 1 You should be telling them to, like, not have sex and then you fuck all their wives. That kind of thing.

Speaker 1 So you tell them to give, you say, we got to give blood, and then you start sucking. Yeah, and you start drinking like baby blood.
Oh, shit. No, whoa.

Speaker 1 No, I'm saying this is like

Speaker 1 101. Yeah.
Yeah. Learn cult.

Speaker 7 Leadership studies.

Speaker 1 Yes.

Speaker 1 Okay. Well, thank you, Billy.

Speaker 1 Maybe see you this week. I don't know.
Everyone, tell everyone where they should watch you play Twitch.

Speaker 7 I'm actually, I can't Twitch this week, but oh, my Twitch is Berserker Billy on Twitch.

Speaker 1 Please follow and subscribe.

Speaker 4 Do you have C fights have been great?

Speaker 7 You're not going to see any dubs on Call of Duty on Warzone, but it's more just coming to hang out.

Speaker 6 What attitude is that?

Speaker 7 I mean, Hank, no one's coming to watch us win. If they want to watch people win, they're going to watch it.

Speaker 6 Speak for yourself.

Speaker 7 Speak for yourself. Hank, you're not going to become a pro streamer.
You're more, you're trade on your personality.

Speaker 3 It's not an attitude that you're having.

Speaker 7 Trade on your personality.

Speaker 3 Billy, you can have a good personality and win.

Speaker 1 Yeah, but I mean,

Speaker 1 I don't know.

Speaker 7 I'm just terrible at the game. Once I get better, maybe I'll be more competitive.
You got to focus.

Speaker 1 Like, I mean, mean, okay.

Speaker 4 Anyway.

Speaker 7 Well, thank you guys for having me on again. Also, message the haters.
Stop going my DMs. You can just tweet it on the timeline, but it's just stay on my DMs.

Speaker 4 Yeah, stay out. Out of the DMs.

Speaker 7 You're not getting in my head. You're just in my DMs.

Speaker 1 Right. Right.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 You're so not in his head, he has a specific message for you.

Speaker 7 Yes.

Speaker 1 Mm-hmm.

Speaker 7 Just you can tweet whatever you want on the timeline. Just stay out of my DMs.
You can be in my mentions, just not my DMs. There you go.
Got it.

Speaker 1 Okay. Emails on lock.
You can make your DMs.

Speaker 1 Only people who follow you.

Speaker 1 I mean, only people you follow.

Speaker 7 But there's a lot of nice people who come into the DMs.

Speaker 1 Oh, okay. So then keep it open.
No girls allowed in my DMs. Okay.

Speaker 1 Thank you, Billy, as always. Thanks, guys.

Speaker 4 Love you guys.

Speaker 4 I'll become a bigger lover.

Speaker 4 Come on,

Speaker 4 me

Speaker 4 take

Speaker 4 me

Speaker 4 on.

Speaker 4 I

Speaker 4 beg you,

Speaker 4 it's the same.

Speaker 4 I'm all shit.

Speaker 4 somebody's turned in a burden.

Speaker 4 So I'm

Speaker 4 just

Speaker 4 saying after me

Speaker 4 to preserve the song.

Speaker 4 Save

Speaker 4 on

Speaker 4 me.

Speaker 4 Save

Speaker 4 me.

Speaker 4 I

Speaker 4 do.