Trey Wingo, Gronk Is A Buc, Leroy Retires And Mt Flushmore Of Our Dumbest Fears

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On today's part in my take, we have the man who's going to be at the center of everything on Thursday night, Trey Wingo, who's hosting the Mega Draft ESPN NFL Network together. We talk draft, we give him some tips, We talk the bear incident.
You know, the bear incident. We have Rob Gronkowski traded to the Tampa Bay Buccaneers.
We have hot seat, cool throne. And then we have a Mount flush more of dumbest fears.
No Mount flush more of fears, but it's the Mount Rushmore of dumbest fears. Mount flush more of fears that that we have meaning they were doing meaning fears that we have that sound weird sounds stupid that are irrational irrational fears that we're gonna be like death it's gonna be a very specific way to die so it's the mount flushmore of fears but also the mount rushmore of irrational fears of yeah a very stupid fears um and i'm sure hank will probably pick pizza or something like eating too much pizza something something that everyone universally loves and he's gonna decide what have i chosen that everyone universally okay let's let's just get to the ad and then we'll get to that you are the greatest heel that has ever been created in mount flush no you guys are just it's incredible i love it it's good for engagement it's great for engagement pandering paul and pandering you pandering for engagement.
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Okay, let's go. Now in the street there is violence And then a lot of work to be done No place to hang out or wash in And then I can't blame all on the sun Oh no We're gonna rock down to Electric Avenue And then we'll take it higher Oh we're gonna rock down to Electric Avenue.
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Today is Wednesday, April 22nd, and Roberto Gronkowski is officially a Tampa Bay Buccaneer. All your nightmares have come true, Hank.
But first, boop for Leroy. Boop scoop for Leroy.
Boop scoop for Leroy. Listen, this was one scoop that I was pretty confident, or Leroy was pretty confident from the start.
He did get his credit, so I guess we bullied the credit out of him. Not on the bottom scoreboard, though.
Well, here's the thing. I feel like he got enough credit.
Schefter credited him mostly just to get back at Rapsheet. Rapsheet credited him after much consternation on Rapsheet's part, after going out of his way to not credit him.
I think he finally did. I think what.
In the most petty way possible. He hated, if you read the tweet, it was through Nash Teeth.
Read it in Ian Rappaport's voice. While you pull it up, I think what put him over the edge was he tweeted something about the deal and I just tweeted a rat and cheese emojis at him.
Oh, no, yeah, but right before you did that. And then he texted me right after.
He's like, dude, what the fuck? I did the full rat quote tweet of it and then i think leroy tweeted out now i can't be held responsible what leroy tweets but he tweeted out credit me bitch well so and he called him rat cheat rapapur uh well he could have easily just played along i there's a part very small part of me that's like i kind of get it because this was one of his biggest scoops and he was like i nailed it should have got it earlier and then he just got fucking bullied online by everyone he should have put the scoop out two weeks previously it really was too it's not like we kept it a secret so here there was a moment there too when we were texting and and and you're like shefter shefter did the right thing by playing along and then it dawned on me i was like wait shefter just did that because he didn't have the scoop. And he basically was four minutes past Rappaport.

So he's like, who can I credit?

Oh, yeah, PFT's dog.

Yeah.

So here's the tweet for me in Rappaport was great scoop, Leroy, period.

On your game, comma, as usual, period.

So not a lot of emotion coming out.

Translation, I can't believe I'm tweeting at a fucking dog.

I do this for a living.

This should be a huge moment for me. I'm so goddamn mad.
And whenever he sees any leroy tweet he rolls his eyes so when he says as usual that's not that's not being serious now to know that was tongue-in-cheek directly in cheek because leroy is not as usual well no leroy's about i did the math on his account he's about 60 retiring that's twice as good that's pretty good as any baseball player. Yeah, post-deletion.
There was one deletion. Post-deletions.
Okay. There's one deletion, so we'll bump that down to 59%, which is still pretty good.
Yeah. It's better than a lot of people's tax rates.
So, Hank, I'm sorry, first and foremost, about being right about the scoop. It's not one that Leroy wanted to nail, but Leroy would like to make the announcement that he is indeed retiring from the scoop game.
I've got his bone. I brought his bone in and a poop bag.
I can raise his bone to the rafters after this is over. We'll do a retirement ceremony.
We don't know how to turn on the lights, but yeah. That's fine.
That's the rafters. Oh, yeah, these rafters.
Yeah, but then that gets in the way of my squats. What did you...
If I ever wanted to do squats, it would hypothetically get in the way of doing them. Very good point.
So Leroy's retiring. What is the man behind Leroy who has an insatiable desire to actually be an insider going to do? Oh, I don't want to be an insider.
I just want my dog to be right every now and again. Okay.
But are you going to, no, no, no. Here's the thing.
I see Leroy is popular out there. Some would say that he's more popular than me and and I would agree with him.
People love dogs. Yeah.
Boobalicious. What I'd like to do with Leroy's account, and you guys give me some feedback and let me know if you think this is appropriate, I'd like to pivot him out of the breaking news game, put him out to stud, put him out to retire, to just nap his days and snack and fall asleep and drool all the live long day, and then use the account to grade the scoops of actual insiders.
Okay. In terms of, like, if there's a moment like what happened today, let's just say Leroy had not put the news out there completely accurately two weeks prior, and Rappaport beat Schefter by about four minutes.
After they both tweet out the news, Leroy serves as the judge and say, this scoop goes to and say this scoop goes to I like that so he becomes like kind of the grand master of yes the oracle the grand wizard of scoops no we don't okay uh I like that here's another idea I'll just throw it out there it's like a player retiring going into media exactly that's exactly I'll just throw it out there what if we change Leroy's Twitter account to, or we change it to Leroy, part of my takes, guest booker, and we just use the Twitter account to harass people that we want to come on the show? I mean, we could do both. Yeah, we could do both.
Just tweet them all the time, and maybe even change the Twitter handle, go on part of my take. So literally, the first response to a blue check mark is, go on part of my take.
And everyone's like, dude, go on, pardon my take. Here's what we can do is we can use.
You can't get mad at a dog. All direct replies will be for the purposes of booking guests on part of my take.
So tell us who we should just send Leroy after. Yeah, Leroy, he can be a retriever.
Yes. Just fucking go after people.
Yeah, so he is retiring from the scoop game. I feel like he got enough credit, and this was a big enough scoop.
Yes, absolutely. I feel like this is a good one to go out on top with.
Absolutely. But, I mean, it's great redirection on Hank's part steering this conversation towards Leroy because we need to talk about Rob Gronkowski.
The actual trade. His two heroes going down to Florida.
Rob Gronkowski traded from the Patriots for a fourth-round pick, and the Patriots then send a seventh-round pick with Rob Gronkowski. It brings up a good point.
Is Leroy ever going to come out of retirement now that he's retired? Oh, if you don't think that Leroy is going to come out of retirement when PFT gets that itch for some news breaking, I'm actually going to report that right now, that he will come out of retirement. That report is being disputed.
So please credit Big Cat when Leroy comes out of retirement. The report is being disputed by sources who would know.'ve filed it to the desk it might take a year but he will come out leroy circles are telling me that that is not in fact the case that that pft could start another account for a different animal and then use that and build that one up have a whole like fucking zoo of animals breaking shitty scoops all around me um but yeah there was an actual trade and gronk is going down there now h told me that he was going to be...
It would break his heart, I think is what he said, if this ends up coming true. What'd you do for Leroy's retirement party? Stop trying to stall us.
No, I'm giving our good boy our proper due. You don't even care? You're numb to it? I never said that.
That's, once again, fake news from PFT. Isn't this good for you? Because now you can just be a Bucs fan.

You can have Edelman go down there and be like,

hey, the Patriots are my number one team, but I'll root for the Bucs.

Do you think Tom Brady and Gronk will retire as Buccaneers

when they go into Canton?

No.

I think they might.

If they win two Super Bowls, I think they go in.

If I can be real with you, with my pals here for a second.

Yeah, let's just pals. Pals talking.
Saggy Sorrowsrows? There's definitely, like on one side of me, it makes complete sense. Like, Gronk was retired.
It's not like they're in the prime of their career and they left the Patriots. It's like a one last hoorah.
It's Florida, nice weather. They're both trying to get out of the Patriot way.
I kind of understand that. There's another part of me, especially with the last dance, where as I'm watching the last dance the whole time the whole time i'm just like how can you have this team and how are they not playing for the bulls and there's a small part of it where it's like how is tom brady and rob gronkowski playing in nfl and not on the patriots it's it's tough and when i heard uh like in my house my girlfriend played the video with the we ain't going nowhere song and and my heart sank.
That's my favorite video of all time. She had to needle at you? No, she was just scrolling on Twitter.
You think that was just totally randomly popped up? Interesting. I knew right when that played, I was like, this is going to be very sad.
It's sad. Dirty water right after.
It's extremely bittersweet. It's very, very sad.
Caroline randomly came on. I will a Bucs fan, but it's also like...
I'm not going to be like... I just can't do it.
I can't be the biggest Bucs fan in the world. Okay, so here's the...
I mean, it's very different than obviously... I'm also happy that we...
I'm very happy that I knew it was coming. Otherwise, I would have been way more heartbreaking.
Yeah, that's true. Because it did go zero to like, if you don't know Leroy,

you don't listen to this show, you would have been like, what the fuck?

We all saw it and were like, oh, yeah.

We knew that was coming.

And also, it tells us, yet again, don't ever believe a coach or a player

when they say they're retired for good.

Or a dog.

That's why my dad still thinks.

Maybe trust dogs.

Yeah.

And that's why my dad still thinks Barry Sanders could come back like this is the door is always a little bit open yeah and so so gronk actually put out a non-denial denial of of this report what like three days ago yep i'm actually trying to get rob to be the one who breaks the news about leroy retiring so we'll see if he beats leroy to that punch tomorrow probably not okay um but but yeah it is going to be weird to see him down in Tampa Bay wearing those uniforms. It's going to look unusual.
I do think it's going to get very interesting if they make the playoffs and it looks like they might get on a collision course. What if it was New England, Tampa Bay, and the Super Bowl? In Tampa Bay.
In Tampa Bay. You know what also is going to be very fascinating to watch? Like, will Gronk, how many excessive celebration penalties will Gronk get? Like, all these, you know, how many weird interviews will he do during the year? Oh, he's already booked on Howard Stern.
Like, he's got everything. That's probably the main reason he wants to go down there.
And the most important story that I got my eye on, Rob Gronkowski is still the 24-7 champion in wwe and the wwe has released a statement saying congratulations to rob gronkowski the current wwe 24 7 champ on his return to football per the rules of the 24 7 title gronk must defend his championship at all times in any location he He could be celebrating a touchdown pass from Tom Brady anytime, anywhere.

That's come on if i know vince they're gonna fucking just they're gonna all come out of the tunnel right after a touchdown probably all get arrested but he'll have to defend they probably all live down there anyways right they'll run out of the the pirate ship yes it'll be like a giant you're a thousand yard stare now it's you you said your piece and now you're just done i feel like soggy stars would actually help you process this no definitely not because he wasn't even on the patriots it's the patriots got an asset no he didn't have earlier that's actually 100 true like that's not a spin zone robin kowski was not going to play for the patriots again you You just got a fourth-round pick out of basically thin air. Correct.
We had Jay Glazer on the other day, and he was saying that Belichick won't do this. I think Belichick is the most likely coach to do it.
He's like, oh, I get a free asset? Most other coaches would be like, no, I'm going to let my personal beef stand in between me and making the right choice. Belichick is so cold-blooded, he'll just be like, yes, I will get something for nothing.
So the biggest question now that we have remaining is... Will the NFL season happen? Probably not, so it doesn't really matter.
Julian Edelman, what does Jules do? That's got to be... He really is the SpongeBob meme come to life.
He's just standing in the window watching Gronk and Tom play in the yard. To take it back to a previous generation, he could be like the to say anything meme where he's John Cusack and he just goes down to Tampa and he holds up a speaker outside the practice being like, notice me.
Please forgive me. Take me in.
There's also a part that like Tom Brady might have just done this because he keeps getting kicked out of Tampa Bay parks. And he was like, I need someone to throw to in my backyard.
I need a buddy. Yeah.
Yeah. I'm sorry, Hank.
I'm just sorry. sorry that's all if it were me in your position i would feel just awful i think what's happening right now is you're in the denial phase which is what you should be in if the season happens which it won't and gronk does his first gronk smash that's gonna that's gonna be your heart smashing into a million pieces yeah i mean honestly and like this is going to be crazy, but the uniforms thing, I was going to save it, but the uniforms thing doesn't help.
The Patriots downgraded their uniforms to look like a high school team. That was so weird.
And it's just one of those things where you're just like, oh, wow, we're really, like, the past is the past. Can I give you one more spin zone? We're in this new era of Stidham in these shitty jerseys and hoping, I don't know, I don't don't know i don't know here's one more spin zone this is the good times can't last forever it'd be selfish to act like it's going to be you know complete dominance every year for like it

has been for the last 15 this is the last thing that you can hang on to the nfl season's not

gonna happen well there's that and then there's also the chance that this was a mega mega tampering

situation tamper bay so gronk according to some reports out there has been in touch with all

I'll be right back. was a mega mega tampering situation tamper bay so gronk according to some reports out there has been in touch with all these parties over the last couple weeks that would hypothetically make it a tampering case which in turn would actually solidify the case i was making earlier that the only reason the patriots let tom go to tampa bay was so that they could entrap them into a tampering charge.
Like, this could be Belichick's master plan to get Tampa docked all the draft picks and to have both Tom and Gronk return to New England with like three extra third rounders. That would be nice.
It's a good point. I'll hold on to that.
It's all just... The other spins on the Yav Hank is like nothing makes sense anymore.
So it's kind of perfect that. It's been like that since Brady left.
Right. But if we had said to you a year ago, Tom Brady and Robert Kowski are going to be Tampa Bay Bucs, you'd have been like, what? And I'm like, but we're also don't have sports.
We're all locked in our own homes. Huh? And the biggest sports news story of the last month has been a fake coach that Big Cat made.
Yeah. Dogs.
Air dogs, baby. And your dog breaking the biggest poop.
And my dog. This is actually, like, considering that there are no sports, this has been a pretty decent sports week for part of my team.
Yeah, we're just living in an alternate reality. I like this reality.
You've created a total different world. With the exception of the fact that I can't go out to a bar.
Or watch a sport. And Jake breaking the Buffalo Wild Wings.
That's right. We really have really have like our own bubble of just huge news fake sports i'm really mad because i had it i had a scoop that i could have broken that revel ended up having but someone emailed me that uh the jonathan taylor had was getting was buying a toppers franchise in in madison you had that one on i thought they sent me the email and i was like oh who cares yeah you got it i saw him tweeting i was like god damn it i could have could have had that i got that too i didn't even yeah we all probably got it we never even think about it damn you got to

make an account for your dog to put that this is well this is all revel has right now is fucking

great well that's all he ever has is just breaking pr emails i'm also giving leroy um it's not a

severance pay but a pension so he's going to be receiving a pension his retirement so he'll be

taking care of income nice sort of that oh you Medicare for all? Yeah, exactly. Okay.
I'm going to put a rose in Leroy's display name on Twitter. That would be funny if he became a political pundit for the election season.
He could. Leroy could just pivot to politics, like get out of sports entirely.
This shit bores me. He would dominate Chris Saliza.
Leroy could just pivot to politics like get out of sports entirely this shit bores me he would dominate Chris Saliza Leroy is actually pound for pound a smarter individual than Chris Saliza I don't know who Chris Saliza is good he is the revel of politics oh geez yeah you would hate him I already have one revel in my life yeah that's more than enough for for everybody um but so it's also gonna be interesting to see how they use Gronk down in Tampa Bay because they've got two good tight ends. OJ Mayo has been underused.
Here's what they probably will do. They have a terrible offensive line, so they'll probably just use Gronk as a tackle.
Disagree. I think they're going to do the opposite.
I think Bruce Arian sees Mike Evans and he's like, Rob Gronkowski has lost 25 pounds, 30 pounds. If we can have one big wide receiver that's awesome, let's just use Gronk as a wide receiver but he Gronk is definitely that that's got to be such an awesome feeling not only is he back in football he's like yes I'm back but he's also has to gain like 15 pounds and I know he was in here being like I feel healthier than I've ever felt I'm reading and I'm doing all this stuff dude come on you can also now eat like a million cheeseburgers and put on weight yeah that's a great feeling drew rosenhouse was on espn today saying that rob is already back up to 265 pounds bullshit yeah he's gotta say that he's like 235 but i don't think he's gonna put on that much weight i think that arians is gonna be like i like throwing the ball deep he's got i like throwing it outside they got a bad like that's the the one thing if you're saying, like, oh, my God, 10 big bucks are going to be incredible.
I don't know. They're going to have to draft some offense.
Yeah, they'll draft somebody. I don't think that they're going to use Gronk to – he's going to be Randy Mass out there.
He's just going to be, like, a big, tall receiver. That was, like, 1.75.
That's not bad, Randy Mass. It also works because Randy means horny, and Gronk loves getting it up.
True. All right, so we got draft coming up uh thursday night tune in we have a huge draft show barstool draft show will be part of it we got everyone else will be part of it steven jay will be part of it who is like steven jay no one has ever had a better quarantine than steven jay because he's the only bucks fan in america and he now has brady and gronk um we're debuting a new music video during the draft too it'll actually the song will be featured should we play the song right now yeah let's play at the end of the show okay into the show you give them something they have to keep listening for yeah and then we also have the name of it yeah uh we interviewed condoleezza there we go and then we also have make sure you tune in end of the show we also have uh a wedding tomorrow night we do i was going to get to that in my Hot Seat Cool Throne.
Alright, so then let's do our Hot Seat Cool Throne. Hot Seat Cool Throne.
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See AHS.com slash contracts for coverage details, limitations, and exclusions. Hank, hot seat, cool throw.
On my hot seat is your goat, the Joker. Yeah.
But, spin zone. It's no wonder.
Cutler and Joker, I'm kind of the anti-vax guy. Yeah.
Even though I don't believe in it and think those people are fucking psycho. You also disagree with Hank.
Actually, no. You agree with Hank's new policy of never taking shots never taking shots yeah that's true never taking shots so he still confirmed your goat yeah we'll get through this we'll get through this i mean that was just you know people are just kind of this witch hunting left and right whatever i i in full honesty i've watched uh jokovic play like three tennis matches don't know anything about him Can't even pronounce his name.
But he's still my GOAT. My other hot seat was UPFT.
Uh-oh. Speaking of tennis, table tennis.
We're playing again on Thursday. Oh, shit.
Okay. Six o'clock.
That's fine. Good.
I'm actually looking forward to this. And we're actually going to do a four out of seven this time.
Yep. The last one doesn't count.
Coming for a clean sweep. Because I was told that it was going to be best of seven.
You won in five. I'm going to really brush up on my ping pong.
That's true. There's no technicalities that you can get off on this time.
Yeah, that's true. But yeah, Big Cat, here's a little tip.
The paddle is the bat in ping pong. I just learned that one.
Don't tell me how to do my job. I'm just saying.
If you're going to be talking about the expensive paddles that we're procuring. There was a point in the last broadcast where I started just Googling it, and I kept on saying things off the screen, just using them totally incorrectly.
Because you use a weird handle. Just on my serve, yeah.
Yeah, and I couldn't figure out what to call it. All right, what's your...
So that'll be 6 o'clock on Thursday at 9 o'clock tomorrow. My cool throwing is love.
Oh, okay. I kind of stole it from PFT.
You definitely stole it. I mean, I had it written down.
I didn't steal it, but then you said you were going to do it, and I was like, I already had it written down. Whatever.
My other cool throne was uniforms, which we already kind of talked about, too. Patriots released theirs, kind of trash, disappointing, which is just my general outlook on the franchise as a whole right now and the chargers released theirs and they're amazing the chargers proved i i actually loved that the chargers did this rams well hot seat rams but the chargers we needed a uniform drop to keep the internet honest whereas like these are objectively amazing no one should bash them because i said that right was like, I love these, but I know how the internet works.
Someone's going to bash them. And then we'll just be the cynical assholes that we are.
But it feels like everyone loved them. The only thing I had against these interviews.
Don't say the numbers on the helmets. No, no, I love those.
I love those. Reminds me of college football, old school shit.
What I don't like about these uniforms is that they remind me too much of San Diego. They made me just wish that they were located an hour and a half south.

Bolt Man would have loved these uniforms.

He would have.

Absolutely.

He's crying a single tear right now.

Damn.

Bolt Man.

I love Bolt Man.

Him at City Council is still one of the all-time greatest sports pictures I've ever seen in my life.

Is that mascot still up for sale?

His whole uniform?

I don't know.

I was asking what?

Like just $60,000 for it?

Yeah.

I mean, it comes with mystique. does uh my hot seat is oil oil is on the hot seat big time it's actually oil costs negative money well let me correct you here buddy no don't tell me how to do my job people kept on being like you can't get into the stock market on twitter if you don't know anything like myself so holy shit people go at you my understanding is that oil is trading for negative dollars because well and earlier today okay it was because you have to buy these futures contracts on oil and so if you purchase them and uh you have to sometimes put them in storage there's no storage space for oil people have all the storage space filled up so now there are all these people that are sucking gallons and barrels of oil out of the ground and don't have anywhere to send them so they have to pay people to take it off their hands for them correct i i would i would liken it to uh brock osweiler's contract with the houston texans when they had to pay the cleveland browns i think about 40 million dollars just to take brock osweiler off hands.
That's essentially what's happening with oil right now. Yes.
So we need to store it. Yes.
Have they considered- It's always sunny plot. ...making a pile for oil? I don't know.
We should do it. I don't know why someone's like, just doesn't take it.
If you have a shitload of land, I guess it's probably a little bit of hazard. Some lights a match.
We have two floors in this office building. No one's working in right now.
It's true. It's true.
We should just store some oil up here. Just keep it all in here.
Put it in. Everyone's got a bathtub.
Yep. You've seen Game of Thrones, P.H.
You know how that ends up now. What? Just put them in a bunch of Starbucks cups and leave them around at our feet? Mm-hmm.
Well, no, then we get blown up. Oh, yeah.
Oh, if you have too much oil? Yeah. Oh.
Was it wildfire? People don't invade places because of oil. No, but it like it just takes like one you know fire arrow from across the bow i don't know what you're talking about boom oh you're talking about dragonglass nope season two yeah what's the shit that goes in the in the boat they turn yeah wildfire got it okay wildfire is oil uh my cool throne is ben simmon shot because he's been working with his trainer i don't know if you saw the quote from his trainer earlier today.
He said, when his shot is fixed, it's not even going to be just three pointers. Oh, so Ben Simmons is going to unlock a new shot.
He's going to the big three, big three or rock and jock where our NBA GM tournament edition, he's got hit a shot from a, from a hotspot on the court. He's.
So Ben Simmons is good. How did this affect the whole NBA shutting down?

How did that affect the futures bets on him making like three and a half, three points?

I think everything gets null if they never play again.

Damn.

Yeah.

I don't think anything's going to.

I don't think they're going to play again.

Ever?

Ever.

I heard a nasty rumor today.

I'm not even going to repeat it.

I mean, I've canceled sports for 2020.

You guys got mad at me for that. I just heard a nasty rumor today.
Say it. No.
Say it. No, we were out of their playing business.
Say it, PFT. College football is not happening.
Yeah, no, I don't think it is. Until the spring, at least.
Yeah, I don't think it is. How can they? I also heard that Notre Dame is putting, like, or the city of South Bend is going to go out of their way to ban football games.
It's, it's, it doesn't make sense that they can play. Like I, I hate that I have to say this, but it's the truth.
Like how can you make kids who are not getting paid go and play if there's a pandemic going on? I agree. What about pros though? Pros is a different ball game because now everyone wants to make money and it's like they could figure out a way to do the quarantine bubble and all that shit.
I don't know. Someone make a vaccine.
You know how many times I've just thought about like, dude, just fucking make a vaccine. Have we thought about just going full send on a vaccine? Be legends about it? You're really...
You have to be able to then mass produce it for 300 million people though. That's the hold up.
Shut that up. That's the holdup.
No, we can give it to the sports people. Give it to sports players.
Give it to all the sports. I don't give a fuck.
I'll stay in my house if you play sports. What if we tested it on sports players? Great.
Great. Give the vaccine to the sports, to the athletes of the world.
Let them play, and I'll get mine in fucking 2022. I don't care.
Okay, here's the deal. Because we can't be hypocritical here.
We can't expect a player to take a vaccine that we don't also get ourselves without knowing it's safe first. Fine, we'll take one too.
Yeah, exactly. So to be able to watch the games on TV or get into them, you also have to take the experimental vaccine.
Who says no? All you nerds out there, stay in your house. All of us sports guys.
Shoot whatever you want into my heart. Oh, man.
I don't care what it is. Yeah, no, I don't think.
I just don't. I think we're all just hoping and praying that it's just going to all magically disappear.
But, yeah, how do you have college football? I don't think that you can. Good news is Doug's is at least 10 years away from his third heart attack.
So Doug's also into Yukon football. I never get tired of beating PFT and ping pong.
Well, and also I just realized, you beat me three times. One of which was lucky because I served into my own face.
PFT never happened. I just realized this.
What are we going to do now? I guess we'll have to give it to Jake Marsh because my plan was to keep playing Duggs until eventually I win a national championship as a head coach and then kill him off with a heart attack and have him be reported. So I guess Jake Marsh will have to report.
I would actually. You think there's a kill screen in NCAA where it's like 2030? Yeah, we've got a kill screen over here.
We've got a kill screen. We've got a kill screen.
kill screen. Want to come see the Donkey Kong kill screen? Like the 20th season? It just ends? Yes, that actually does happen.
I saw some guy played 60 seasons and it said, literally the menu said, like, coach, you're a legend now. Time to hang him up.
He killed your coach off? You could also get him involved in some sort of like really really bad scandal yo he's

scandal all the time i mean he's been doing scandals left and right he's been paying who's

that coach from alabama that coached there for like two months was it price that there was this

big report in sports illustrated came out the alabama football coach and he was like fucking

hookers and telling him to scream roll tide at him bro i got this yeah i'm gonna do all the dougs

people don't talk about that guy enough no that's a's a fucking legend. Doug's has a poster of him in his office.
All right, my hot seat is Ryan Pace. So we got a lot of stories about Wi-Fi and how everyone's drafting.
This one comes from Colleen Kane. She said, Bears GM Ryan P pace said today he will draft in his dining room has seven monitors and a cord running from his router down the stairs to his setup to make sure internet is running smoothly noted a hiccup the other day when his wife vacuumed and accidentally unplugged his monitors why even admit this just say i got it i say I got the fucking internet.
Don't worry about it. This is...
He's got a fucking 50-inch cord going from his dining room to his basement. I'm really enjoying all these different NFL GMs that are doing home renovation projects.
The GM of the Seahawks just tore down some walls in his house. Really? To install new cables.

I love it.

They're freaking out.

I love it.

They're going to screw up their own homes, and it's not going to work,

and it's going to be glorious to watch.

I'm actually – I haven't been this excited for a draft,

and part of that is because the R-words are picking second,

but I haven't been excited like this for a draft in years and years

because of the potential for just absolute chaos and weirdness.

Yeah, it's going to be crazy. Tune in on Thursday night.
It's it's gonna be fucking awesome we also have trey wingo coming up in a second uh my cool throne is coffee coffee drinkers i know i tweeted this earlier it just popped in my head nick van exel yes ice coffee drinkers what like drinking coffee at this point in my life with the quarantine everything's going on is easily highlight of my day. I don't know if you guys agree, but like you've turned into coffee.
Dad looking into the, like waking up being like, Ooh, when am I going to have my coffee? Grabbing the mug. Yeah.
There's nothing else. There's nothing else to look forward to.
You know, that Twitter account coffee, dad, it's just like literally every tweet is like going to have some coffee. Yeah.
That's my coffee. Yeah.
Are you guys not, do you guys not look forward to your coffee? I have coffee. I look forward to my Death Wish coffee, but.
Death Wish coffee every morning. Death Wish.
Like that's all I have. It's the 10 minutes like going up to the coffee, then drinking the coffee, and then the 10 minutes after we're like, that was good coffee.
I look forward to my first beer of the day. I look forward to dropping in on Warzone.
Really gets the blood flowing. I look forward to Game of Thrones, too.
We all have our things. And we go home and watch an episode.
I actually puke before every Doug's game, so I don't really look forward to it. I get so fucking nervous about the teenagers bullying me.
That's good, though. When you stop puking, that's when you have a problem.
That's true. The coffee, though, I don't know.
It's just all I have left. Do we make homemade iced? No French press.
Ooh la la. What's that mean? When you say it, it sounds crazy.
Kiss it with your tongue. It's just, it's all I have left.
Do you make homemade iced? No, French press. Ooh la la.
What's that mean? When you say it, it sounds crazy. Kiss it with your tongue.
It's literally the easiest thing. It's boiling water, and then you just put the grounds in the thing, and then you just push the thing down, and then you have coffee.
That's it. That's pretty sweet.
What about the way that the dude from Breaking Bad made it, where he had a whole setup? What did he have? had like a percolator or something. Yeah, see, I'm not going to become a coffee guy

because then you're just a douchebag.

Sounds like a brew. Coffee? No, he's a coffee dad.

It sounds like you're a coffee guy. No, I like to drink it.

No, I like to drink it. Not a coffee guy.
There's a difference.

Yeah, coffee guy is like, now I'm

going to start brewing. Like an IPA guy? IPAs in my

tub? No. No, I'm not doing that.

I just like to drink coffee. I had five

cups today. I'm going to have

another Death Wish right now. I had five cups today and I

feel good. That's totally normal.

I think it's just because it really is

I'm going to have another death. I had five cups today and I feel good.
That's totally normal. I think it's just because it really is the act of like getting up and being like, all right, time for another cup of coffee.
I'll tell you what it is. It's that it makes your brain feel different.
Yeah. Something.
So like, I don't care what it is. If I'm like, if I'm going to bed and I have a sip of NyQuil to knock me out, if it's late in the afternoon, maybe I have an extra curricular gummy.

Then that's something I look forward to.

If it's my first beer, I look forward to that.

If it's a stimulant like coffee, I look – just anything that makes me feel different over the course of the day.

Oh, we know.

I'm not a drug guy, Hank.

That's one misconception about this show.

Oh, speaking of which, Phil Mickelson just responded to that tweet of mine.

What is Phil doing online? He said, coffee is for wellness, physically and mentally. Who even knew some people don't drink it? That's so sad to hear.
I don't know if I'm taking my physical... This is where Leroy needs to come over the top and be like, Phil, come on the show.
Phil, come on the show. Yes, Phil, Phil.
You want me to hit him with it? Phil, come on the show? Yeah, Phil, come on the show. And now everyone listening to this needs to go and reply to Leroy's...
Yes. Phil, I don't know if I'm taking physical and mental wellness from Phil Mickelson.
Why? Absolutely. Have you seen his calves? Yeah, that's true.
Tremendous calves. And we do have similar cup size.
He is the ID of physical specimen. Both in coffee and breasts.
Well, he's lost some of the man tits, which is very disappointing. I'm on a diet, so I'm on the way.
How's that going? Meet meet you there phil uh pretty good just drinking coffee to stunt your appetite five five five cups of coffee a day that's the big cat diet i dude uh nick costas who's who's a good follow on twitter gambling twitter he said that he started adding a cigarette with his coffee during quarantine i was like i might do that if i could smoke inside could smoke inside, I would do it. I considered starting to smoke again when the quarantine started.
Dude, something about having a cigarette inside is fucking awesome. Peaky Blinders.
I've been watching Peaky Blinders, too. They just rip them 24-7.
It's like, where were we in the 1800s? Dude, Six Inside is one of my favorite things in the entire world. We were down in Nashville.
We found that random trailer bar. I think it was called Santa's.
I just went back there two nights in a row just so I could smoke more cigarettes. And I'm not even a cigarette smoker.
Yeah. All right.
Let's get to Trey Wingo. Trey Wingo.
Oh, PFT's writing. Phil, come on.
Pardon my take. Bark.
Yes. Yes.
See, we changed the avatar to guest booker for part of my take. You should make it head booker and just see what Kelly says.
Oh, yeah. See how long it takes for that text to come in.
Can you get a picture of Leroy looking at a calendar and make the avatar? I'll have it be Leroy, but with bangs and like a Bob haircut. Yes, yes.
I'm looking straight at it. Like, what do we got? Maybe put a a sharpie in his hand um all right bft you got an ad before we get to our man trey wingo yeah before we get to trey we're very excited to announce a brand new partner do we have a new partner noise hank i know we have a new segment noise no new new partner though here we go that was impressive.
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One also has other delicious flavors like birthday cake, maple glazed donut and blueberry cobbler. Find all one bars at a retailer near you or on amazon.com it's now trey wingo okay we now welcome on recurring guest and friend of the program he's going to be in every single television in america in your living room on th Thursday night because he's hosting the draft

and hosting everyone for the draft. It is Trey Wingo.
Trey, thank you for joining us. First off, I want to say a belated happy holidays on Monday.
Sorry about not having you on then. It's quite all right.
Don't worry about it. It's all good, boys.
How are we? Okay, we're doing good. Let's start with logistically.
have you had the moment where you realize

this is insane what we're doing good. Let's start with logistically.
Have you had the moment where you realize this is insane what we're about to do, and you're going to basically host a draft across two different networks, and everyone's going to be remote on Thursday night? Yeah, I mean, not really. We're going in for a huge test Wednesday, and maybe it'll sink in then.

But, like, you know, the draft is insane to begin with.

Like, right before you guys came on, and maybe it'll sink in then. But, like, you know, the draft is insane to begin with.

Like, right before you guys came on, we were just flicking through the channels.

Or you guys called.

We were flicking through the channels, and the 2017 draft from Philadelphia was on.

By the way, I have bad news for the folks.

What happened to that one?

All right.

At the top of that one.

I saw it, too.

Okay.

They just picked Mitch Trubisky and Patrick Ronald.

Again?

Still on the board.

Mm-hmm. Football told me twice.
I mean, the draft itself is insane, right? I mean, it's crazy. So, like, it's just the way I'm looking at it, like, everything going up to the draft for me is the same, and how it plays out is how it's going to play out, but I can't worry about that, right? I'm just going to have to do the thing, and we'll figure it out as we go along.
What's the sentiment from around the NFL? Because I've read some pretty crazy stories about NFL GMs, front offices, tearing up rooms in their house to put in new high-bandwidth cables, things like that. I'll put it this way.
What have you learned from conducting your show remotely that you think the NFL could learn before the draft starts? Well, I mean, it's going to be messy, right? There's no way around that. And I think that it's not going to go smooth.
I mean, they had their test run the other day, and it was a two and a half minute glitch with the Bengals trying to make the first pick. And the joke, ha ha, the Bengals, it was actually on the league's front.
So they had to figure that out. But after that, it went okay.
Diana Rossini was on with us this morning, and she was hilarious. She was talking to one GM, and apparently he couldn't get his Wi-Fi to go because all the kids were watching Disney+.
Oh, my God. It was eating up all the bandwidth at the house.
So, look, it's going to be weird. I mean, like, normally we've seen situations in the past where if a team doesn't get it on time, you know, the Vikings in 03, the Ravens in 2011, and they were jumped.
That's not going to happen this year. I think there's going to be a little more leeway.
Adam Schefter had the story that the Lions guy, the IT guy, is going to be in a Winnebago outside his house. Right.
That's the funniest part. That's hilarious, right? Number one, if you're in a Winnebago, that's a Chevy, right? You work for the Lions, you should be in a Ford.
This is why you're next level. I had not even put that together, but you were 100% right.
Or they could be in a Vanny Woodhead, which would also work. Here's a crazy thought.
Why not just let him in the house? I don't think he has to be in the driveway, right? Just like waiting like he's conducting a heist? They're basically saying one person in a house at a time. The NFL actually sent out a league-wide email saying, don't try and game the system like some GM or coaches or some owner is downstairs and is like, GM or coaches hiding in his master bathroom upstairs.
They don't want that. They're like, if you do that, we're going to find out about it.
The hammer will come down on you. Ernie Adams is definitely going to be like under Belichick's bed whispering to him.
That's crazy. That is crazy.
So logistically speaking, you're going to be the only person in studio, correct? Yeah, it'll be me and the camera operator and maybe one other person. That's it.
Oh, my God. And then what is the plan for spreading the ball around between ESPN and NFL Network talent? Because we had Daniel Jeremiah on on Monday, and we're like, are you going to get called on? Do you have a list that you're going to basically give preference to your guys and then maybe sprinkle it to the NFL Network guys? No, look, I think the idea is, look, Daniel used to work for us before he worked for the NFL Network.
Michael Irvin used to work with us. Obviously, Rich has been here.
Kurt Warner has sort of been around. We're going to get everybody in.
And the way I'm looking at it is, is it a lot more people? Sure. But it's just that many more resources at our disposal.
So, you know, you guys know this. This is such an incestuous business.
Like half the people at Fox or NFL Network or ESPN all worked at one place or one another. So it's kind of actually cool that we get a chance to do this.
Like last year, I remember we had a big thing on SportsCenter. was me, Rich, and Reese.
And we all just sort of, you know, telling stories leading up to the draft and how it went. Then we all went our separate ways.
But we're all sort of in this together this year, which is kind of cool because I think that's the message the NFL wants to get out there is like, you know, the draft is always about like, okay, we can suck forever, but the draft this year, it's going to turn around. It gives hope, a little new beginning, and obviously that's something that a lot of us are looking for right now in our daily lives.
Hopefully this will give us a little injection of some semblance of normalcy when sports has just gone off the charts. Football is family is what they're getting at.
I like that. How bummed are you from a personal standpoint that you don't get to go to Las Vegas?

Yeah, you know, I was just watching that draft in Philly, and that was the first one. Legal marijuana out there.
Yes. The first two years in Chicago, the day three was outdoors.
But that year in Philly, the whole thing was outdoors, and it was nuts. I mean, Friday night in round three, we had 125,000 people screaming, fly, Eagles, fly, at the top of their lungs when the Eagles made their third round pick.
And it was awesome. We just shut up for like four minutes and let them finish the song.
And then Drew Pearson got up there and yelled at the crowd. They yelled back.
There's no way to replicate that, right? I think we were planning on having close to three-quarters of a million people in Las Vegas. We had 650,000 in Nashville last year.
That's just not going to be there. There's no way to replicate that.
So that's going to be, I think, the biggest challenge is to keep that energy going because you fed off the crowd. You guys have been there.
You know absolutely has have you had the moment yet where you're like this is actually an opportunity of a lifetime for you personally given the captive audience here and there's no you know usually the drafts running against the nba playoffs or the stanley cup playoffs you are basically like america's dad i'm not gonna say stepdad america's dad I was about to say stepdad would be in conjunction with this show. That would be more inappropriate.
That's just for me because Mike Greenberg I always looked at as my morning show dad. So then you came and you're like, hey, I'm cool too.
And you turned your chair around and you're like, let me rap at you kids for a little bit. But no, in this situation, you are definitely you're American.
Yes. You're going to be all we've got, Trey.
You're going to be trending. You're going to trend on Twitter.
Everyone's going to be like, Trey Wingo, great job, unless you screw it up, obviously. But as we're sitting here right now on Tuesday night, everyone's going to be like, Trey Wingo, holy shit, man, way to knock it out of the park.
Well, look, the way I look at it and the way I've always sort of done it, no matter what I was doing, like when I was doing the women's NCAA tournament, if I'm doing it, it's the most important thing, right? That's sort of the way I've gone about it. So that hasn't changed at all for me.
I mean, it really hasn't. And maybe at some point over the next 24 to 48 hours, it'll hit me, but I don't think so because it's just doing the thing.
And then we're just putting it out there. That honestly, I know know that may sound stupid, but that thought hasn't really even crossed my mind.
It's just about preparation and getting ready and then executing. So just think about it for a second.
I don't want you to get the yips or anything. Yeah, I don't want you to get the yips, but like literally everyone's going to be watching you.
Yeah, it'll be fun. I mean, listen, seriously, like, what's the worst thing that could happen? I mean, honestly, what's the worst thing that could happen? Like Roger Goodell's face freezes or you're having an interview with Ryan Pace and the feed cuts out.
I mean, it's going to be messy. The draft on its best night is never fully smooth.
I mean, my God, speaking of the national holiday on Monday, you know, Laramie

Tumple showed up smoking weed in a gas mask.

True.

True.

One of Jerry Jones's friends might walk by in the background without clothes.

It's a good point.

It's a good point.

It is.

It's chaotic.

And now it might even be better.

It might even be less chaotic now with a little more structure.

Well, the only thing that's weird, as you guys know this, is when you're sitting

next to someone and doing this, like nonverbal communication is the thing. Okay, they wave, you want to get in, I got that.
And then there's the pauses because there's going to be Lewis and there's going to be Booger, there's going to be Mel, there's going to be Todd, there's going to be Michael, there's going to be Daniel, there's going to be Kurt, there's going to be Rich. I mean, that part of it.
I mean, we also have 60 guys. We have 60 players set up with remote, I don't want to say camera crews because they're not there,

but remote setups to be able to deal with them and Susie with the interviews.

So the pauses are going to be a little weird.

That's the thing that I would think of because everybody's not always on the same, it's not always in sync.

You know what I mean?

You can tell when there's a little pause sometimes and there's a half second or second delay and it feels like forever.

So that'll be the thing to make sure we don't step on each other's toes. But it's going to happen.
There's no way around it. There's no way around it and you just have to sort of deal with it.
What's your professional trick for dealing with that pause? Because I always do notice on TV and I always get like secondhand embarrassment for the anchors that are having to deal with it when you say, okay, we're going to kick it over to so-and-so and then there's, you know, they're nodding, they're looking at the camera, they're nodding. At what point do you jump in and say, well, it looks like we're having some technical difficulties? How long do you give them? Well, it's funny.
When you start early on and you hear that, you think a second is like a day, and you want to jump in right away. So I'm going to count in my head, like, okay, three, four.
And if nobody's saying anything and I'm not hearing anything from anybody in the control room or the truck, then I'm going to say, well, clearly that's not happening. So we're going to try and go to somewhere else.
It's like flying over the Rockies, right? You know there's going to be some turbulence, so you just want to wear your seatbelt. Yes.
So let's talk a little actual draft. What's going on with the Tua slide? Do you buy it, or do you think this is maybe someone trying to sneak into those top three or four picks and pick up a franchise quarterback? Well, I kind of buy it because of the way the draft is this year, right? I mean, you can't bring him into your building.
You can't check him out. And, you know, he put up that 10-second video, what, about a month ago, and people were freaking out about it.
And my thought process, yeah, he looked great, but how do we know, like, as soon as the camera stopped rolling, he was like, son of a bitch, that hurt. You know? You just have no idea.
And then he went through the 9-minute, 22-second thing, and I think that calmed a lot of people's fears. But the really weird part about this, guys, is it's Miami, right? Because in 06, Miami refused to clear Drew Brees because they didn't think his shoulder was strong enough.
So they passed, and they settled on signing Dante Culpepper in free agency. Clearly that was not the way to go.
And if they do pass on Tua, if he is healthy, they might be going down that road again. Right.
And guess who Tua's college coach was, the former coach of the Dolphins, who passed on Drew Brees. So is Saban weighing in on this? Is Saban like, hey, don't fuck this up again? Yes.
Saban has been like, look, Tua's everything. He's going to be fine.
But no one knows. I mean, like, the weird thing about Tua is it's not just the hip injury, right? It's the two ankle sprains, which, by the way, a lot of doctors say that he's actually going to be much more stable by having that wire surgery in both ankles.
But he also had the lingering knee injury. So, like, the hip injury, whatever, it happened, it's a freak thing.
But in three years, he's had the two surgeries on both ankles, a lingering knee issue and the hip. And then you're thinking, all right, okay, so he was really good in college, but there were two things about Tula in college.
He was really good, and he really didn't get through a season healthy. So when you get to the next level, when it's bigger, faster, stronger, is that going to be a problem?

And I think that's part of the process that Miami is weighing here.

Nobody knows, like Thursday night, nobody's going to be right.

But that's the beauty of the draft.

Nobody's wrong and nobody's right.

Now you go back to the 2015 draft, the top ten picks in the draft in 2015,

only one of those guys is still with the team that signed him.

That's Brandon Scherf, the offensive lineman for Washington. Everybody else, including the two quarterbacks, have moved on.
That's crazy. That's crazy.
Who do you think is going to be the first wide receiver taken? You know, I think that a lot of people are locked in on Jerry Judy, but boy, I love Henry Ruggs. I mean, he has 98 catches at Alabama, 24 of them went for touchdowns.
Put another way, like one of every four catches he took to the house. Now, obviously you're not going to do that in the pros, but he's not just a one-trick pony.
Normally straight-line speedy guys like John Ross in Cincinnati, that's what they do. Yeah, but he runs the routes.
He only had one drop. I mean, it's really interesting because it just rugs CeeDee Lamb and Jerry Judy.
Those three guys, if you talk to five different player personnel guys, they'll give you five different answers on the order of those three guys. Have you gotten a sense from around the league of a team that might be a little more aggressive given the circumstances, a team that you can hear, you know, from more than a few people like, Hey, they're going to move up.
They're going to be trading, wheeling, and dealing in this draft. Well, because of what we're dealing with here, I'm wondering if it's going to be less aggressive.
John Elway came out and said it yesterday. We had six trades in the first round last year.
I don't know if we're going to have that many, unless they're prepackaged trades. You've figured it out ahead of time, because if you are concerned about the technology and your Winnebago or your Vanny Woodhead guy isn't out in your driveway, are you going to be able to figure that out? So usually teams that have multiple picks are very aggressive, right? The Dolphins have three, the Raiders have two, the Niners have two, but they're already looking to trade back.
The Vikings have two, and I think the the Jaguars have two so normally those teams that are most aggressive are teams with multiple picks and normally in most situations those teams with multiple picks usually trade up for a quarterback although the Saints did it a few years ago and traded a first rounder for Marcus Davenport the defensive end out of UTSA San Antonio and he's been okay but he hasn't been exactly what they thought if you're spending that kind of draft capital you're probably looking at a quarterback it just dawned on me how awesome is it to have covered all these drafts and be able to just say where guys went to college because that's like the baseline of having someone think you're a super smart sports guy to be like yeah Marcus Davenport UTSA and everyone's like, you know your shit. Well, it's funny, Big Cat, because the draft is like, I know all this stuff about guys, but over the next three months, it'll fall out of my head.
You're forgetful. And then I'll go into the season, and I'll see that guy, and I'm like, oh yeah, wasn't he the guy that was the juggler or whatever? Right.
And then it sort of comes back, you know? But I mean, it's like cramming for an exam, you exam. I don't have to know everything all semester long, but if I can nail it over three days before the test, then I'm getting the grade I need.
That's a perfect analogy. Speaking of that juggler guy, what is the one fun fact that you just can't wait to unleash on America in the first round about somebody coming off the board? Well, I don't know if a lot of these guys are going to be first-rounders.
A lot of those great stories are like in the second round, but there is a potential first-round running back who would have been a philosophy major at Harvard, and his favorite philosopher is Immanuel Kant, the German philosopher. Be careful how you pronounce that.
That's a really good one. You might get trending if you fumble over that name there.
Very careful. You've got to pronounce to pronounce it very slowly.
Yes. Cut.
Yes. A-A-N-T.
Yes. And then you'll cut.
That would be trending for the wrong reason. Yes.
We also have an offensive lineman who also played snare drum in the high school band. That's when we realized he had to do something else.
There's a guy who swims with sharks and cliff jumps. That's also good.
Ooh, red flag. There's just a bunch of fun stuff.
That's the kind of stuff I enjoy because everybody looks at the draft and they think, we're just getting a product. No, you're getting a person.
Some of these people are 21, 22 years old, and they have some really cool stuff in their background. I like telling that part of it.
I think Big Cat wants to get to this eventually. I'll just jump in and say it.
Chicago doesn't have any picks on the first day. They're picking in the second round.
43 is their first pick here. Do you expect the Bears to show up unexpectedly, kind of a backdoor move, and get a surprise Bears appearance on Thursday? In the first round? Yeah, surprise Bears.
It's on your back porch. Oh, you mean like the kind that would be on my back porch that would be leaning over? Oh, I didn't think about that.
But yeah, that too. Like peeking in to see what we're doing? Yes.
But it's night out and it's day out in the picture. I mean, like for example, the Bears came back last week.
Did they? Yeah, they're here every night, bro. Every night? You need to do a live stream, like a nature a nature live stream in your backyard yeah set up a camera gopro it's it's no it's nuts i mean they're they're here like all the time and we we actually have like over the last three months we we've noticed that there's a a couple of bobcats out there as well it's like it's crazy up here rural connecticut is a great place to ride out a pandemic, but you are in bleeping nature out here.
That's crazy. I do want to discuss the bear picture real quick, then we'll get back to the draft stuff.
So last I heard the party line on the bear picture was you had the same bear that showed up a couple years ago, but then you didn't get a picture of it this time. No, this bear has been, I mean, like he's been here and I'm assuming it's the same bear because we've been in the same house for five years and he shows up all the time.
But he came through, it was like a Friday night at like 11 o'clock, and he was on the deck eating the bird feeder. And then we turned on the light because we heard the thump of the bird feeder falling down.
And so he got scared and ran away, so I couldn't get a picture. So this was at 11 o'clock at night, so I just looked for a picture of a bear on the deck.
And I said, so a bear was on my deck. And I didn't think anything about it because I figured it was a daytime photo.
People wouldn't think I was saying that was the bear. I was just using that as an analogy.
And I went to bed, and the next morning I woke up, and it was kind of hilarious. Friday bears.
It was interesting, Trey, because me, like a lot of other people in America, I think we thought you were pulling a fast one on us and saying that this is the bear. And that bear had gone previously viral.
Yeah, big cat. How many bear videos have I sent you? He actually has sent me like three or four bear videos of just a bear just hanging out in his backyard.
I believe there are bears. Well, you need to start putting those videos online so that everyone else can understand that this is an active bear situation that you have.
I mean, they're all over Connecticut, right? I actually thought it was kind of funny somebody put a Photoshop of like sharks in my bathtub, which I thought was very funny.

I thought I thought that was pretty good.

So, you know, it's like when I ate the chip, you know, that hot chip.

I did it twice in one day and people didn't believe I ate the chip.

So, you know, people are going to believe what they believe.

It's true.

It's true.

All right.

The other big thing I wanted to discuss with you, draft prep.

I wrote down some quotes that you could possibly use. If you want to take out a pen and paper, I'll just fire them off.
So Chase Young from Maryland. I'm thinking crab cakes and football.
That's what Maryland does. Yeah.
That's pretty good. That one would be good.
And this will be the second straight year that the Redskins did that, right? Yeah. Because Dwayne Haskins

went to high school in Maryland with Dan Snyder's

kid, I believe. Yes.

What about just doing the lock it up?

Lock it up. No, you lock it up when you want

someone to stop talking on the Zoom.

Lock it up? Alright.

For you, I will work that in. Okay.

Now, here's my question for you.

Here's my question for you. How concerned are you about the tread on Jonathan Taylor's tires? Well, running back is always – You went to 926 carries in college.
I know. He is special, though, and he's got the size and the speed.
You don't see that combo very often, but, yeah, I mean, he's an awesome, awesome player. I feel like his career, not getting invited to new york was a travesty because he was that good for for that many years but yeah i would i'd be a little worried about the the tread on his tire now don't don't get me off my old school uh anchorman wedding crasher quotes okay i see what you did sorry i interrupted you um then now this one you take it or leave it but i was thinking given the the the time with the pandemic and everything you could just open up the broadcast with death you are my bitch lover that's from wedding crashers maybe not probably gonna think that wouldn't set the tone off okay what about if we get a big trade and you just give the old classic will that escalated quickly Okay, and then my last...
You can also use that if a bunch of players from the same position get taken right after each other. Yes, yes.
In succession, yes. And with the receivers, there could be a run of those from 10 to 20.
That's what I'm thinking. That's your prime territory.
If the Ravens do anything crazy, you can give them an old Great Odin's Raven from Anchorman. Yes, absolutely.
We are ready, although Mel will probably be upset if I take that and he doesn't. Okay, and then the last one I had was from old school.
Maybe when the Vegas Raiders pick their first player, you can do a little America, can you earmuff for me? Earmuff, earmuff, earmuff. Yeah, this guy's going to get so much ass here, it's going to be sick.
I'm talking crazy boy band ass. Say that.
Potentially. Okay.
That's not a no. That one is a thought bubble.
We're working on that one. Just think about it.
Have this one ready too just in case of emergency. If there's like a GM or somebody that you're talking to and they have like a little kid that runs behind them in the background naked, just say, we're going streaking.
Yes, yes. Yes.
By the way, who's the owner you think that is going to leave the camera on when he goes to the John, right? Which owner is going to actually keep the video zoom on when he has to retire? Virginia McCaskill. I was going to say, I think Mark Davis might conduct it from the toilet.
Yeah, yeah, that's true. Just knock it up.
Listen, these are weird times. These are end of days we're sort of dealing with right here.
Well, we're rooting for you. We appreciate you coming on.
This has been fun. I know that you do.
Let's give Trey a lot of credit because we do make jokes at your expense, and you always take them very well. So you roll with the punches.
The old school, the wedding crashers, the anchorman quote jokes. So we appreciate this, though.
And good luck. Don't think about the fact that everyone in America is going to be watching you on Thursday night.
Don't think about that. You know, listen, if we come close to the days, the numbers for the last dance, we'll all be very happy.
And I promise you the one thing I'm not going to do too much in this entire process is think. Yes.
And I'm going to say this. I'm going to give you a guarantee on behalf of PFT.
If you nail this draft, I think PFT has to tweet out, great job, America's dad. I'll do that.
Yeah, listen. No, no, no.
Here's what I'll do. Trey, if you nail it, which I fully expect you to, I'll tweet out, did we just become

best friends?

I think so.

Yeah.

Want to do karate in the garage?

We'll do some Catalina wine mixing.

It'll be great.

All right.

Well, Trey, thank you so much, man.

We appreciate it.

Best of luck on Thursday night.

Everyone, I don't have to, I'll say it, ESPN is going to be broadcasting it.

Everyone's going to be watching because we have nothing to like it.

Did you want to get one last Disney Plus plug-in?

I noticed that you slid that in elegantly earlier.

Yeah, do it.

Listen, I was just reporting what Diana Rossini, your friend,

Yep, confirmed.

what your friend told me on the radio this morning.

Okay.

All right.

Fine, fine.

That works.

All right, well, Trey, thanks so much.

Appreciate it, man.

Guys, you're the best. Always fun to talk to you guys.
We'll talk to you soon. Thank you, Trey.
Good luck. Hockey is on.
And no matter the city, no matter the team, no matter the game, whether it's face-off or penalty shots. Regular season or playoffs.
Win or lose. No matter what happens.
No matter where it happens. New Amsterdam Vodka is there.
Okay, let's get some segments and also clean up Hank's cool throne that he just said love and then just left us high and dry stole it from pft well i think it's because we all agree that love is always on the cool throne love is always on the cool throne love you guys uh i do love you guys i say it all the time i do um all right what i like your shirt by the way thank you hey what's going on there pal we saw you the hockey game on do i know you guys i'm ryan whitney i got a drink named after me. Not a big deal.
Pink Whitney? That's what I thought. See you, fellas.
I invented the thing, you pigeon. Pink Whitney for legendary moments.
Anytime you put a pocket on a shirt, you just, there's something about it. It's just like, dude, I got an extra pocket.
What are you going to do? Little tip. If you put a hair tie thing in there, especially if it's one that's been loose for a while, it kind of looks like you got a magnum.
Yes, there it is. So, a little pro-tepi for looking to communicate.
But it is. It's such a flex to be like, hey, ask me if I have three pockets.
Oh, yeah, I do. But love is on the cool throne because the very first part of my take wedding is happening tonight.
That's right, Wednesday tonight. Where? It's going to be on the Twitch stream, on the part of my Take Twitch account.

Two listeners of the show, Drake, a good Drake, and Abby are getting hitched.

So it's funny.

I think their first date they ever went on, or one of their first dates,

they were at Wrigley Field back in 2016, and Big Cat saw them.

And you said to them, you guys are perfect for each other.

I don't even remember, but I wish I could have bet on bet on that yeah and so that was like the start of the relationship they hit me up about a week and a half ago to see if i would marry them um and then i tweeted out like a few days ago hey if anyone wants to get married i'm bored i'll marry you on a zoom meeting and they reached out and the guy was like hey i already hit you up about this what gives good point great? Good point. Great point, dude.
So tonight we're going to have a wedding. It's going to be at 9 p.m.
Eastern time, 8 central. And it's going to feature Big Cat.
It's going to feature Joey. It's going to feature Hank.
It's going to feature Love. Love.
It's going to feature Matt Caesar. Yep.
And so we're going to do the whole wedding. I think it might be the first wedding ever conducted on Twitch, too.
So history. Yeah.
It's history. No F's in the stream.
While we're doing the vows. No, yes.
Do not do that. Their family will be watching.
Let's all be positive. And then Coach Duggs is going to be coaching right after.
Yep. So it's a nice...
You got your entire entertainment ready on Wednesday night. Yes, absolutely.
All right, next segment we have, oh, this league. This actually is crazy.
Yannick Ngakwe wants to get traded, so he took it to Twitter. Tony Kahn, co-owner of the Jaguars, Shad Khan's son? Yeah, Shad Khan's son.
I don't think he's co-owner. He's GM? Vice President.
Vice President. He's someone big.
So they basically just had it out on Twitter. I'll read it.
Actually, you know what? You read Yannick, and I'll read Tony Khan. Do you have it? He's owner slash football analytics at the Jaguars.
Do you have it? Hold on, I'll send it to you. I'll send you it.
Okay. Hank, stall for us, please.
Stall. Stall.
Stall. Stall.
I'm also going to be going after dub number four after Coach Doug. I got it.
I got it pulled up. Alright, you be Yannick.
Stop hiding, Mo. This is Tony Khan.
I'm not in hiding, sir. Quick with the sir.
I'm in isolation getting ready for the draft. I've been pretty active on social media in isolation, but you wouldn't know that since you unfollowed me again.
This league. That is big time this league.
Since you're feeling might today, let's both let the world in on the truth. We've been had a discussion that the Chargers game was my last game, yet you try to backdoor the situation without answering any of my camp's calls.
SMH, you spoiled bra, holding up people for no reason. Clown emoji.
Just to reiterate, this is star defensive player for the Jaguars tweeting at the vice president, co-owner of the Jaguars, you're a clown, and basically like. Use the clown emoji, which I think is worse.
Airing everything out. Okay out okay uh he wrote back tony connor back it's a new regime here sir heavy on the sir i kind of like that style i thank you from the bottom of my heart for all the contributions you made here that said tweeting insults at me won't get you traded any faster only good trade compensation will do that please redirect your efforts into a more productive outlet.
That's a little, like, that's a, you know, like, go stop being triggered, dude. Go do something with your life.
Yeah, get a life. Yeah, get a life, nerd.
Just trade me. I don't need the speech.
Checkered flag emoji. Wow.
Tony Khan responded. It's actually, it's honestly tough to come back from the checkered flag emoji.
It's over. Because he just said that he won end of race yes uh he said show me the compensation i'm sure you're really driving up the price today by the way and you know what kind of a good point by uh tony con like hey man you want to be traded we want to trade you you know what you shouldn't do is get super aggro on twitter in front of the whole world so that everyone now is going to call me and be like, hey, man, no chance you can bring this guy back.
We'll give you a six rounder. Also, I mean, if you just didn't respond to that tweet, that's probably going to help the value to all around.
This is a mess. Yes.
I feel like there's been a lot of that in Jacksonville recently. Poor Doug Marone.
He's doing everything he can. He's the only adult in the building he is and leonard for net he's also like out outwardly campaigning for cam newton to come and also maybe getting traded now they're trying to trade nothing to the chiefs yeah that's what i saw that's not gonna happen florio to the chiefs they already got playoff damien there yeah playoff d baby regular nard for net um all right let's finish up with uh our mount flushmore i'm excited about this one i think it's gonna be funny it's very open-ended and it ended and uh hank can't ruin it the heel of mount flushmore season the greatest i'm giving you credit but you're you're making up titles like i have not i've not told a lie you're a heel yeah I mean's great.
You said jalapenos are a bad pizza top. They are.
Here's the thing. First of all, Big Cat, no, he didn't say bad pizza top.
He just said bad topping. It is.
Your brain was just focused on pizza the whole time. I did gummy bears.
Here's the thing. What Hank has done is with his appetizer draft, he's reset the conversation.
So now all his other drafts will be viewed in light of that. Like that was such a bad, like a monument to bad draft.
I would just like to say to everyone out there that's hitting me up in private and on DMs that were like, hey man, I've always felt the same way as you, but I never wanted to publicly say it. Thank you for being the voice of the voiceless.
You're welcome. And don't let these bullies like Big Cat and PFT and all these people online tell you that your taste is trash.
In a weird way, Hank, you are winning Mount Flushmore season because you are so bad at it. That is the true essence of Mount Flushmore.
You are on the Mount Flushmore of Mount Rushmore. Right.
You're doing, like, in a meta way, the idea of Mount Flushmore has come up with the worst answers, and you're doing that. I just don't pander.
Sorry. Okay, but you kind of are because you're pandering to, like, be the heel.
No, to be the heel. I speak truth to power.
You don't even pander to your own brain. No, that's exactly.
That's the only person I'd pander to. All right, go ahead.
You go first. It's me.
So, Mount Flushmore of fears. Yeah, so it's the stupidest fears we have that everyone knows it shouldn't be a fear, but you have it and you think about it and it's just dumb.
Okay. This was an easy one for me first overall.
Taking a shower in a thunderstorm. Hate doing it.
Somewhere along the lines, I was told that you'll get electrocuted if you do it. I don't think that's true at all.
I think that there's probably no safer place to be during a thunderstorm or a tornado than your bathroom. Okay.
So don't take my word for that, by the way. So I can't be held legally responsible if you get electrocuted.
But, yeah, that's easy number one for me overall. Okay, that's a good one.
Mine is similar in the bathroom sense. I am always afraid that I will get robbed or there will be some type of emergency while taking a shit.
And just like having a robber come into my house with just shit everywhere. What do you do? Die.
There's no good option. Do you just pull up your pants? Imagine like mid shit and someone comes in and is like, give me all your money.
What do you do? It's just, I don't even want to think about it. All right, Hank, Hank your first two my first one is being in a viral video of musicians on the subway where they're like we took a classically trained musician and we had him play on the subway and then it's all just the videos of people walking by so every time I see a musician on the subway I'll just stand there for at least 30 seconds just so I'm not one of the people in the video where it's like look at you dude, this guy wrote Beethoven and you just walked right by.
You just walked by Paul McCartney playing on his piano. Yeah, he's wearing like some sort of weird mask and he's playing like That's a good one.
So I'll just stand there for like 30 seconds and be like. That's good.
Don't stop it. Don't patronize me.
That's a really good pick. All my picks are good picks.
All my picks are good picks.

I've thought about that, too.

You don't want to be the guy that's in the meme where it's like, look at our generation,

and then it's you walking past like an artist, and look at their generation, and it's everyone

storming the beach of Normandy.

Yes.

My second one is getting pantsed.

Oh, good one.

Good one.

That's just an old school.

There's nothing funny. I also have no ass.
Yeah, I have no ass, so it's like I feel like I'm a prime target if you're a pantser. The wind could pull down your pants.
Getting pants and having your pants and your me undies go down, all-time funniest things. When someone's dick is flopping out there.
A lot of dicks in Game of Thrones, though. No one told me about that.
Yeah, oh, yeah. I just i just watched the shame episode big time big time um oh you because you texted us a while ago like when

did cersei cut her hair yeah i knew it was coming all right my next one is very irrational but i

spit a lot i spit on the street i dip i'd spit i'm always afraid or not always afraid but i am

have it in the back of my head that someone will be able to use my spit and frame me for a murder

I'm sorry. spit i'm always afraid or not always afraid but i am have it in the back of my head that someone will be able to use my spit and frame me for a murder i'm just spitting my dna everywhere someone's going to like basically catch it and be like we got him now boom also hair follicles blood semen semen all that semen's a big one for me dude someone's gonna frame you at some point gotta be careful gotta be careful you gotta stop spitting stop shaking hands yep and stop nutting i'm just i know that that's stupid but it's i'm always afraid like that's gonna happen i i actually used to think that the government collected all of our shit every time we flushed it so they always had that yep all the info probably do probably actually you know what i'm gonna get back on that now that i said it out loud again, I'm convinced.
All right, what's your next? My next one... You have two.
Two. I'm afraid of tripping over an open dishwasher like in Garden State.
Yeah. Yep.
That's how the mom died. Yeah, she dies.
The whole movie is based around a mom falling over a dishwasher and hitting her head. I've never seen that movie, so that's a dumb one.
Great great movie. I had a great soundtrack.
You don't like the shins? I like the shins. Is that like an ironic thing? No, I like the shins.
No, like they had the band called The Shins in a movie where she trips and dies. I think she tripped backwards.
I don't know actually. It's good coffee drinking music.
I'll put it that way. I'm always afraid of that.
Alright, that's a good one and then it's it's a it's a one it is a fear yes oh man okay uh my next one when was the last time you washed dishes hank every night actually i usually do in the morning i pile them up in at night i'm like i'm gonna do this tomorrow and then in the morning it's's like, all right, let's dive in these dishes. You strike me as a Chinette guy.

I don't even know what that means.

It's the thick paper plates that you can use. They're real good shit.

They're actually really classy.

No, I actually have an amazing dishwasher, which is like the most dad thing ever, but

it's my favorite appliance in my house.

There you go, Hank.

Loading up my dishwasher gets me pumped.

Coffee and dishwasher.

Yeah.

No, you're the coffee guy.

No, I know, but together, we're just a team.

My next one is going to be biting down on aluminum foil. Ooh I have a Nestle Crunch Bar or something like that, something that comes wrapped in aluminum foil, I'm convinced that when I'm eating, I can't even look at aluminum foil while I'm chewing something.
Yeah, that's a good one. That is a good one.
All right, my next one, I don't – this one is going to be bad to even say out loud, but if we doing it we might as well say it you know how when you see a police officer in line at like a starbucks or something and you're like what would happen if I just grabbed the gun I'm always afraid that someday I'm just gonna grab the gun not do anything with it but I'm just gonna grab the gun and be like got my got your gun it's because it's the impulse effect in your body at some point is like what's gonna happen am i gonna just do it yeah since we're kids we've been told like never touch a gun that gets my adrenaline going just never touch a police officer right and it's a combination you see it there you've been told all your life not to do something it almost makes you want to do it more right and at some point you're just gonna be like fuck it let's just do it and i again i would literally just drop it right away but just to do it and just be like i did it that is a fear of mine there's an old saying that people aren't afraid of heights they're just afraid that we're gonna jump right like when you see something like it's the last thing that you should go yeah but you are afraid of like these weird impulse yeah the impulse like oh i'm jumping all right that's a one. Thanks, Hank.
My next one will be getting crushed by an elevator door. Yep.
I don't trust those things at all. Elevators in general.
My great grandfather died in an elevator. Really? Oh, yeah.
It fell on his head. Oh, wow.
Was he an elevator operator? RIP. I don't know how he got in there.
It's one of those things, though. I hope so.
People go into elevator door holdings with no fear. Yeah.
Like'll be closing, and they'll just stick their arm right in there. It's true.
Assuming that it's going to open. And if it doesn't, like, your arm is off.
Your arm crunches. I never...
That actually... Like, Hank is 100% this guy, because you do do the, like, really quick.
Like, you get really scared. I've seen you do it.
Yeah. Where you get super scared about an elevator door.
i just man it up yeah like i treat it as an alpha situation like it's mano-a-mano here door you ever live in an apartment building where you know you've got a heavy elevator door yeah that's tough i'm in one of those right now and uh humans put a lot of faith into those weird little sensors that's what i elevator has. Yes.
When did those begin?

When was the first time that they installed those,

and then how long after that did it take humans to be like,

oh, I can open any door just by putting my pinky in there?

Yeah, it is.

We've gotten a little bit cavalier with it.

All right, your last pick, Hank.

This has been a good Mount Flushmore, everyone.

All my Flushmores are good.

I mean, that's not a fear. A fear of losing.
It should be. Getting kicked by a subway dancer.
That's a good one, too. That viral video of the kid? Well, and I don't...
I used to live in Brooklyn, and I lived in between the stop from Manhattan and in between Brooklyn, where subway dancers will basically ride because because it's a long Manhattan to Brooklyn. There's a long 10-minute ride where they'll get on and then get off and go the other way.
So it was like, I was always, every single day, I would see the dancers. And every day, I'd be like, these guys are really like, I'm sitting here, and I'm not going to move.
And then they get so close where it's like, why wouldn't I get kicked? Of course, I'm going to be the guy in the viral video. I'm just going to be minding my business to get smoked.
For people who don't know the New York City subway dancers, they basically are a combo of a gymnast and a stripper. They do the whole thing, and then they do the fucking high beam.
And they're just going back and forth, whipping around, going upside down, all kinds of shit. It doesn't matter if it's crowded either.

There's no space.

It's those guys in the hat guys. You can get really good at dancing with a hat.
They're one and the same. Yes.
All right. My last pick is a little confusing, but it's something that I do think about fairly often.
I'm afraid that like this entire world,

like us sitting here right now is an entire,

it's just an imagination of like one huge species that's just like sitting on a spaceship the matrix floating away yeah pretty much i'm pretty much every now and then i'm like we're definitely in the matrix and none of this is real none of it i mean that's pretty i'd say the last year has been very strong evidence right but that's a scare that's a scary thing to think about like we just wake up and we're like oh we're not real that would suck suck so bad don't have to pay your bookie i don't know maybe i do maybe the matrix maybe in the matrix realm it's all bookies maybe the creator is just a bookie yeah and he's he just made the world so that everybody would be in debt for him yeah that would suck when jj watt knocked on your door all right your uh last one my last one is i'm this is gonna sound really stupid too but getting my fingernail caught on a piece of foam what do you mean like if you if you drag your fingernail like a chalkboard no like a piece of foam. Like do you mean? Like if you, if you drag your fingernail, like a chalkboard, no, like a piece of foam.
Like if it's a foam ball or if it's like the fuzzy part of Velcro, do you know what I'm saying? Yeah. Yeah.
And you drag like your finger across it. Maybe you have an uneven nail and you get your fingernail caught on that for just a sec.
Just thinking about that. I don't know.
It makes me like, shrivels me up. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
That sound. That feeling.
Hank, you want to grade it? F. Why is it an F? It's a stupid fear.
It is a stupid fear. There you go.
Very stupid fear. Hank's fears have been too good to be stupid.
Do we have any others? Driving with a car light on? Yeah. I have...
Planes. Planes.
I have the jetway collapsing as soon as you step off. Like it just fucking falling.
I always think that's going to happen. Do you guys ever hear the urban legend that there's black widow spiders and grapes? No, I didn't have that on my list.
Those spiders crawling in my mouth when I sleep. Yep.
That one's a big one. I don't have a basement, but if I did have a basement, I 100% would be...
This is more like a real fear than an irrational fear of ghosts catching you as you go up the stairs and the lights are off. Like just ghosts in basements.
You know? Yeah. I mean, spiders are real big in basements too.
Yeah. But ghosts more than anything.
Quicksand. Quicksand has been glorified, and I'm just afraid of it.

Who's to say the sand I'm stepping on isn't quicksand?

That's another thing where people have cartoon brain.

Right.

They're taught to hate quicksand and anchovies.

Yep.

Let's see.

What else did I have?

That was it.

Did you guys have any others?

Overtime playoff hockey.

That one's good.

Even when I love it, I hate it.

Yep.

Yep.

That one's good.

That one's good.

Anything else, Hank? You had a great list. I always do.
It was almost too good, though, because these were supposed to be really bad fears. I think Hank did a great job.
I actually, I would say that Hank won this Mount Clashmore. Oh, thanks, guys.
There you go. You're welcome.
Let's see. We'll see everyone Friday night, Friday morning, Thursday night, Friday morning.
We've got draft recap coming on Friday. Also, maybe a special something different interview coming for you on Friday.
We'll see right back. It's melancholy, time to fire everybody Have an open casket, wait for a dog We don't really know Disgust like this We're always drafting bust like this Big pins, 11 and 2 at my home You don't wanna grab your crotch like this Getting fined for my watch like this You't want to hang out with pretty kitchens all alone.
Darling, all are known. I'm fourth and lost.
Lumber drop. Darling All night My foot and lawns I miss the lawn I'm just a drinker Hanging out in the mutie lot Was a fan of Miles Garrett Had.
Had his jersey out. Would wear it.
Burned it after he committed assault. At least we got bigger.
Teamed up with my man Odell. He makes one hand and catches.
Just lines the size of Texas. Eatin' pussy in best western hotels.
You don't really know. Disgust like this.
You're always strapped to bus like this.

Big beans,

eleven and two

at my home.

You don't want to

grab your crotch like this.

Get fined from a watch

like this.

You don't want to

hang out with

pretty kitchens

all alone

Darling I

I

I

I

I

I

I

I

I

I

I

I

I

I

I

I

I

I

I

I

I

I

I Darling, I don't know.

The fucking ones.

I miss your life.

It's Pardon My Take presented by Barstool Sports.