Kendrick Perkins, Top 10 QB's Of All Time, Mt Flushmore of Places To Be Drunk

Speaker 1 Hey, pardon my take, listeners. You can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube.
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Speaker 5 On today's part in my take, we have NBA champion Kendrick Perkins. Great interview with Perk.

Speaker 5 He will just make you laugh. Like his voice and his demeanor and his answers to things.
Very, very funny. Great guy.
A lot of fun, especially him talking about

Speaker 5 his sons racking up $16,000 on his credit cards for Fortnite bills. We have the NFL 100 list.
We're going to do QBs tonight. We're also going to give you our top 10 QBs of all time since 1980.

Speaker 5 We have Hot Seat Cool Throne, Mount Flushmore of Places to Be Drunk, and Guys on Chicks. So a packed show for everyone.

Speaker 4 Man, I'll tell you what. When you're hungry out there, you start acting like a rookie quarterback in his first game, making bad decisions, messing up the basics, being all out of sorts.

Speaker 4 That's where Snickers comes in, man. That thing is packed.
Roasted peanuts, nugget, caramel, milk, chocolate. It's like the MVP of candy bars.

Speaker 4 And when you bite into it, boom, it sorts you out, gets your head back in the game of life, satisfying your hunger. Remember this: Snickers handles your hunger so you can handle everything else.

Speaker 4 Snickers satisfies, man. That's a winning play.

Speaker 5 Okay, let's go.

Speaker 5 Now in the streets, there is violence.

Speaker 5 And then I love some work to be done.

Speaker 5 Low place behind a low-washing.

Speaker 5 And then I can't name all on the sun. Oh, no, we're gonna run down to Elite Trick Avenue.

Speaker 5 And then we'll take it higher.

Speaker 5 Oh, we're gonna run down to Elite Trick Avenue. It's part of my tape presented by a Bar Stew Sports.

Speaker 5 Welcome to Part of My Take presented by the Cash App. I just announced the Cash App Derby is coming Friday night live from my apartment.
So got to get involved.

Speaker 5 We're giving away free money corresponding with each horse to a great charity cause. And we're also giving away money to the AWLs for finishing correct exactas.
So you got to get that ready.

Speaker 5 We're giving away free money on Friday night with the Cat Cave Derby. Today is Wednesday, April 15th.
Oh,

Speaker 5 tax day. Oh, wait.
Oh, not so fast, Mike.

Speaker 5 Holy shit. It's tax day, boys.
Do we know when tax day is? I think June 15th. Oh, they only pushed it back two months.
I'm on the October plan. Yeah, I'm going to need it.

Speaker 6 It's STIM check day.

Speaker 5 Oh, are you getting the STEM?

Speaker 6 Well, I bet away my STIM check playing Call of Duty, so I already kind of lost it, but.

Speaker 5 Got it. You bet $1,500 playing Call of Duty.
$1,200.

Speaker 6 Someone was like, I'll bet you your STIM check, you won't get more than two kills. And I was like, that's easy.

Speaker 6 And then I didn't.

Speaker 5 Well, that's stimulating the economy. Yeah.
We have to get back to normalcy again, and that's Hank gambling on video games that he's not very good at. Dude, how about this?

Speaker 5 It's tax day and we don't have to do our fucking taxes. Well, hell yeah.

Speaker 5 We're living large. Are they also pushing back the October extension date? Because they should.
Let's be fair. They never have to pay taxes again.
Six months.

Speaker 5 So, therefore, December or December 15th should be our tax day.

Speaker 5 With the amount of shroot bucks that are going around the world right now, I feel like, you know, it's kind of a live and let-live society.

Speaker 5 Another good thing about today, we just got a glimpse into the future of sports. Sports Sports is being scheduled again.
Yes. The PGA Tour just announced the second January.
The Cat Cave Derby.

Speaker 5 No, there's a Cat Cave Derby. But also,

Speaker 5 the PGA Tour said that they're going to start playing their events with no fans in, what, June? June. Yeah, so starting in June, they're just going to have these tournaments going.

Speaker 5 So sports is coming back. It's not a moment too soon because I saw, did you see that the last couple days online?

Speaker 5 Various content farm websites, not to name names, but Bleacher Report, are putting together brackets. We're doing brackets in April right now.
That's like the last resort.

Speaker 5 It's brackets in the pick three. The pick three challenge is: I want my eyes to bleach.
But you can't do a bracket. You can't start new brackets in April.

Speaker 5 March is bracket season.

Speaker 5 You're burning through your content so fast. You mentioned Dwight Schruke.

Speaker 5 This is like that episode in the office where Dwight Schruke gets stuck in the elevator and within 30 seconds establishes a peak corner.

Speaker 5 We're like a month into no sports. You can't be busting out the big guns yet.
People are losing their minds, but that's good. So we have sports coming back.
We don't have to pay our taxes. Listen,

Speaker 5 this is good. This is the most positive PMTU start that we've had in a month.
Like we're feeling good. And then PFD, you had a great idea.

Speaker 5 We're going to do a like, let's imagine what the first event, if we could pick any event to come back to, what would we pick? Just to do a little thought bubble.

Speaker 5 Everyone should reply to us with what they want. This is just us being like, let's think about sports.
It's the power of positive thinking.

Speaker 5 So in this thought experiment what we're doing is we're not saying like oh um the super bowl and it has to be in february right i'm saying like if it were to be hypothetically may 1st so you'd have a couple weeks to look forward to it but it could be any event it could be like any game any league any sport what game would you want to be that first one back to pop that cherry what would you want what are we talking crowds or no crowds no just pretend let's just pretend for a second that it's all the crowds it's normal yeah it's totally normal

Speaker 5 close your eyes and like boom you get to watch this game. I mean, Tampa against New England would be pretty sick.
In the snow?

Speaker 5 In the snow or no snow?

Speaker 5 Snow in Tampa. I like that.
Snow in Tampa, Brady and Gronk, Colt Hogan,

Speaker 5 rally towel. Wait, Gronk's on the Bucs?

Speaker 5 Yeah, yeah, because by then, by May 1st, he will be on the Bucs.

Speaker 6 Interesting. I've found it interesting that that hasn't been confirmed yet.

Speaker 5 The draft's still a week and a half away. And by the way,

Speaker 5 it's confirmed. It's happening.
Oh, it's confirmed. Malcolm Butler? No, no,

Speaker 5 no. This is just me being overconfident to get back at Hank right now.
I think it's going to happen still. I'm still at like 85, 90%.

Speaker 5 So I'm in the boat of, I like missed March Madness so, so dearly that I would love... I thought at first I was like, how about like a good old-fashioned Iron Bowl?

Speaker 5 Like Alabama, Auburn, just fucking let it go crazy because that's also probably where sports will come back first is states where they're like, who cares? Just Alabama. Yeah, right.
But

Speaker 5 I'm going to pick

Speaker 5 the finalists here, and I'm probably going to piss off a lot of people, but I would love to see the conclusion to March Madness, and I'll throw it out there. A repeat of the Maui invitation.

Speaker 5 I'd like to see Kansas play Dayton. First game back national championship.

Speaker 5 Got all the storylines. Kansas is a juggernaut.
Dayton Obi Topping. Ain't no stopping.
Shout out Dayton.

Speaker 5 I'm sure the Dayton Flyer fans had a real renaissance this year where they were aggressively say something nice about Dayton, so there it is.

Speaker 5 If you close your eyes right now and just imagine a marching band, a school marching band playing inside

Speaker 5 like having the pomp and circle, like having an NFL game back would be great, but having the pomp and circumstance of a college game and hearing, even, dude, give me Oklahoma putting up 80 against like UCLA and let me hear the fucking song over and over and over in my hand.

Speaker 5 My backup was Oklahoma, Oklahoma State. Yeah,

Speaker 5 give me 90 points.

Speaker 6 I think if it was going to be one event event that's like kicking off sports being back, a star-studded WrestleMania where it's like,

Speaker 6 this is the event tonight.

Speaker 5 You're going to have all the celebrity cameos.

Speaker 6 You're going to have all the athletes,

Speaker 5 all the crowd.

Speaker 6 And then it's like, starting after tonight, sports are back on. It would be the most electric event of all time.
That'd be good. People would be going nuts.

Speaker 5 Also,

Speaker 5 Niners at Seahawks. Because

Speaker 6 you could have players from each league make cameos. It would be a constant, we're back, bitches.
Damn.

Speaker 5 Wet Pete Carroll. Ah.
Chewing his gum at night. Ah, damn, that'd be so nice.
So nice.

Speaker 5 I want to see a crushing loss for the Cowboys in Jerry World. Uh-huh.
Just a shitload of screenshots of him being disappointed in the box. Throwing stuff at his son.
Yeah. Yankees, Red Sox.

Speaker 5 Baseball. Get Fauci to throw out the first pitch.
Fauci wants baseball back. Yeah, he does.
Yeah. So we're going to get baseball back.
I think baseball is going to come back. I really do.

Speaker 5 And I'm down for the Frankenstein version of baseball for one year only. She's been like, fuck it.

Speaker 5 We're all going to play in weird leagues and we don't care because this will be a year that we all just are like, what happened?

Speaker 5 No fans. All right, no, only fans admitted are ones who could recognize Mike Trout at the mall.
Yeah, so no fans. Pick him out of a lineup.
So no fans. His family would be allowed to play.

Speaker 5 All right, so we got sports news. We got visualization of sports coming back.
We also had Defenders, Vipers.

Speaker 5 A little payback game. Nah, yeah.

Speaker 5 Yeah, nah.

Speaker 5 We also have

Speaker 5 sports news with Christian McCaffrey getting paid and people debating whether you should pay a running back or not. I still don't think you should.
Yeah, the answer is no.

Speaker 5 But Christian McCaffrey is the classic, well, look at how much receiving he does. And it's like the old, you keep looking for a unicorn when all you need is a horse.
Like,

Speaker 5 you keep trying to find a way

Speaker 5 to make Christian McCaffrey. No, it's an old saying.
I fucking love that. Yeah, keep looking for a unicorn.
All you need is a horse. All you need is that horse.

Speaker 5 And people are like saying, I think Christian McCaffrey, the stat that uh is most quoted is he's the first ever to in his first three years have 2500 yards rushing 2500 yards receiving uh-huh incredible but

Speaker 5 tell me when paying a running back is worth it it's never worth it it's a but i mean good for christian mccaffrey getting paid this is not a knock at all not a knock at all but it's like yeah if there were a running back out there i would pay be mccaffrey chamara Derrick Henry probably.

Speaker 5 But then Derrick Henry probably slowed it. The thing about paying a runner, it sounds like a good idea at the time.

Speaker 5 And if you're a new head coach, this is such a new head coach move to come in and be like, okay. Face the franchise.
I'm going to anoint the face of the franchise and be like, this is my guy.

Speaker 5 We're moving on from Cam. We're going to Christian McCaffrey.

Speaker 5 It's like ordering shots of Jaegermeisters. It sounds good.
And then later on, it's like having sex raw dog. It's good in the moment.

Speaker 5 Nine months later, you're like, fuck, I definitely shouldn't have done that. The Christian McCaffrey, like, he is the one running back who you can look at and be like, okay, maybe.

Speaker 5 But if you had to do gun to your head at the end of this deal, will you think like that was something that we definitely would have done again? I would say no. Probably not.
Right.

Speaker 5 But was he going to hold out? No, he had still two years left on his deal, so they did like an extension off. It's a just like to show you respect move.
Right, which means that.

Speaker 5 And again, again, if you want to talk about like the perfect time that you would actually pay a running back, it is right before he's not even 24 years old.

Speaker 5 He's a good receiver and running back. He does everything.
He's dynamic. But even with all of that, like,

Speaker 5 that's the part about this whole entire deal is like Christian McCaffrey should be the guy that signs the wealthiest running back contract and everyone would be like, great deal.

Speaker 5 But still in the back of your head, you're like, but running backs are not what they used to be. Yeah.
No, I agree 100%. Matt Ruhl will figure that out pretty quickly.
Yeah.

Speaker 5 He's going to never, this will be the only big contract that Matt Rule ever hands out to a running back. Yes, yes.
All right. Speaking of football, should we do our, we've been doing the top 100 list.

Speaker 5 We've been breaking down every position. We've been dissecting their list.

Speaker 5 Let's do, we're doing quarterbacks today, and I threw it out to the group a couple hours ago that looking at the quarterback list, there's not a lot of mistakes here if we do the same thing we've been doing where it's like the old guys don't touch them.

Speaker 5 So we're going to do two things. We're going to talk about the list.
So the list is as such. Joe Montana.

Speaker 5 So these are actually, let me do the old guys first. Johnny Unitis, Otto Graham, Sammy Baugh, Roger Stahlbach.
Crazy stat about Sammy Baugh that not many people realize.

Speaker 5 In one year, he led the league. I think it was in touchdowns, interceptions, and punting.
I love it. I love it.
He did it all.

Speaker 5 So those are the old guys. So we're not touching them.
Then the new guys are Joe Montana, Tom Brady, John Elway, Peyton Manning, Brett Favre, Dan Marino. Looking at this list, I have no issue with it.

Speaker 5 Nope. If you have to do the old guys, I have no issue with it.
So what I said was we should do our top 10 quarterbacks, rank them from 1980 on. And that's what we're going to do.
Let's do it.

Speaker 5 So, start debate. This could get contentious.
Hank, would you like to start with your top 10?

Speaker 5 I would love to. Okay.

Speaker 6 Just rattle them off? Yeah, in order.

Speaker 5 Top 10. And then we'll figure out where we disagree.
I think we'll agree on a few things.

Speaker 6 Well, this is my personal list.

Speaker 5 Well, it's all of our personal lists. Tom Brady.
No, actually, my list is

Speaker 5 CDC approved.

Speaker 6 My number one, Tom Brady. I mean, no debate there.

Speaker 5 You have Tom Brady. Actually, let's do it this way.

Speaker 5 Let's go around like your ones. Does everyone have Tom Brady one? I did have Tom Brady.
I have Tom Brady one as well. Mo Lewis, one A.

Speaker 6 Tom Brady is one. Joe Montana, two.

Speaker 5 I have Joe Montana, too. Also.

Speaker 6 Blake Bortles, number three.

Speaker 5 Okay, come on.

Speaker 5 Do it for real. But yeah, Blake is obviously.
I said in the beginning, it's my personal quarterback list of the last 20 years.

Speaker 5 We're going to get to this with Perk later, but is this the best or the greatest? This is the greatest. This is how I feel.

Speaker 5 I'm thinking when I was rattling my brain and I was like, what quarterbacks are the greatest? Okay, all right, all right, all right. So I disagree on three.

Speaker 5 Let's do it piece by piece. So we'll disagree.
So I have Peyton Manning as my third one. I also had Peyton Manning.
Okay, so PFT and I have the same list so far.

Speaker 6 Drew Brees.

Speaker 5 I do not have Drew Brees as my number four. I do.

Speaker 6 The thing with Dan Marino and Steve Young, I have them on here, but I just didn't see them. So it's tough.

Speaker 5 Yeah, okay.

Speaker 6 I don't want to be like, yeah, like you've got to put them on the list when it's like, I've literally never watched them play a game.

Speaker 5 Right. Most people only know them from their appearances, a part of my take.
Dan Marino would not be on this list. Blake Bortles and Jared Goff would be one and two.
Baker Mayfield. Baker Mayfield.

Speaker 5 What is your four PF? Aaron Rodgers. What? Aaron Rodgers.
Aaron Rodgers is four. Aaron Rodgers is.
Yes. Have you ever watched him play? Yes, but he's not.
No, no, four.

Speaker 5 Yes, he's four.

Speaker 5 You should know better than I do.

Speaker 5 No.

Speaker 5 No. His career's not over.
And he doesn't.

Speaker 5 No. I mean, if that's the case, I've got several players whose career.
Well, I have a couple.

Speaker 5 I have number four. I have Dan Marino.
But Aaron Rodgers is the best quarterback that I've ever seen in terms of the throws he can make, everything that he can do.

Speaker 5 Now, granted, the last couple years, not as great, but in his prime, like those four, five, six years, the Packers were never out of a game. It didn't matter who was playing wide receiver for him.

Speaker 5 They didn't have a running back, basically. How about Dan Marino? Never had a defense.

Speaker 5 Dan Marino

Speaker 5 Super Power.

Speaker 5 I'm giving Dan Marino his. I was looking at it, and I don't have Aaron Rodgers till number seven.

Speaker 5 So, I mean, I have him on my list. but Dan Marino deserves more credit than he gets.
I know we all make the jokes, but he was fucking insane. So, you and I flip-flop because I had Marino seven.

Speaker 5 Okay, so Dan Marino had five years where I'll look up Aaron Rodgers. Dan Marino had five years where he was led the league in passing.

Speaker 5 He also, Dan Marino was like Patrick Mahomes before Patrick Mahomes when you're talking about his second year in the league when he had 48 touchdowns in an NFL, 1984.

Speaker 5 He had 48 touchdowns in 5,000 yards which is fucking ridiculous and I also so who's your number uh

Speaker 5 real quick I've actually wondered this about Dan Marino maybe you can help me out because to me he doesn't have any signature moments or games where I think that year I think that's the Dan Marino game with Aaron Rodgers there but what about the fake spike Fake Spike there you go okay thank you for helping me out with that fake spike yeah so Aaron Rodgers has never led the league in passing he's never led the league in passing he I mean he has an insane TD to interception ratio.

Speaker 5 I'll give you that. And he led the league in touchdowns once.
Dam Marino led the league in passing five times and touchdowns three times.

Speaker 5 I mean, his, so Damarino's 1984 season, when they went 14 and two, he had 48 touchdowns, 5,000 yards, and this is in the NFL that obviously is not what the NFL is today, and 64% completion percentage.

Speaker 5 He was Patrick Mahomes. He was very good.
I'm not trying to take away from Damarino as a player. I just think that Aaron Rodgers, from what I've seen from him,

Speaker 5 probably like the most impressive arm talent on the player. But then he should win more.
They do win a lot. They just haven't won in the playoffs.
He should win more. I mean, wait, wait, wait.

Speaker 5 If you're saying he should win more, I'm pretty sure his record over his career, what's his win percentage compared to Dan Marino?

Speaker 5 Because you can't not Aaron Rodgers not winning enough. No, I'm just saying that he should have Dam Marino.

Speaker 5 If he's the most impressive guy, I think at some point you also have to back it up with winning a shitload, too. I I mean they have won a shitload and they won one Super Bowl.
But they've won a lot.

Speaker 5 Okay. Listen, I have Aaron Rodgers on my list.
I just think Dan Marino, especially like his numbers when you look at him throughout his entire career, is fucking insane.

Speaker 5 All right, Hank, who you got next?

Speaker 6 My number five, Brett Favre.

Speaker 5 Okay. Okay.
I got no problem with that. I have Elway at five.
I also had Elway at five.

Speaker 5 So the one thing with Elway, which is kind of more to my Dan Marino point, and like, and I guess it would be to Aaron Rodgers that, you know, if you have a better defense, but Elway, the crazy thing about Elway's career, he went to three Super Bowls before he won one.

Speaker 5 And he was basically like carrying that team. Then at the end of his career, he gets an all-time running back and a good defense, and they win two Super Bowls.

Speaker 5 And the history of Elway is written completely different. Yep.
So I looked at it. He went, his first 15 playoff performances, he had

Speaker 5 11 out of 15 he threw for over 225 yards. His last seven playoff games, which were the two Super Bowl runs, he threw over 225 yards one time.

Speaker 5 So it's like he, you know, like if Dan Marino had the ability of having a defense in Terrell Davis at the end of his career, it could be totally different.

Speaker 5 Do you think that Dan Marino, or excuse me, do you think that John Elway would have drafted John Elway? Because I don't think that he would.

Speaker 5 He was only 6'3.

Speaker 5 He said he was going to go play for the Yankees. 215.
Yeah. Yeah, so that red flag in John Elway's eyes.
I think that also, like, in those Super Bowls, John Elway,

Speaker 5 his defense was dog shit in a couple of them. I think the Redskins were up 28 points in the second quarter.
No, absolutely.

Speaker 5 And so it's not on him that they lost those Super Bowls. That's what I'm saying.
John Elway was an awesome quarterback.

Speaker 5 If you ever saw him scramble, he's like, maybe some people out there have seen more of Steve Young than of John Elway. But John Elway was a better Steve Young before Steve Young was in the NFL.

Speaker 5 That's kind of my point, though, is that John Elway

Speaker 5 and Dan Marino kind of had the same, I mean, obviously Dan Marino only went to one Super Bowl, but they had similar careers up until John Elway.

Speaker 5 Like if it's just such such a hard thing to judge quarterbacks when you throw it, like, everything in there, and you're like, oh, yeah, the defense obviously matters a lot.

Speaker 5 And, like, you know, you could play that game with anyone. You could play it with Peyton Manning if he had a better defense, or you could play it the reverse way.

Speaker 5 Like, if Rex Grossman didn't, you know, fumble the ball and

Speaker 5 the Broncos didn't have an unbelievable defense, could he have zero? So it's a what-if sliding door game. All right, number six.
Real quick, I had one more thing with John Elway. Yeah, so the drive.

Speaker 5 So he had, he engineered the drive. We've got the drive, we've got the catch, we've got the fumble.
How many more different plays have yet to be named like really, really simply like that?

Speaker 5 Has there been like the interception? The kick? The kick. We don't have the kick yet, do we? We have the kick six.
Got kick six. Alabama Auburn.
We got the double.

Speaker 5 We don't have the kick yet. No, no, no, no.
I was thinking of the kicking game. Yeah.

Speaker 5 The punt. We don't have the punt.
Do we have the punt return? Oh, yeah. Deshaun Jackson.
Yeah, that's the punt return. Yeah.
Yeah.

Speaker 5 Okay.

Speaker 5 The kick return might be Hester, actually. Yeah.
Yeah. And that's right.
You know, to start the Super Bowl, that's pretty crazy.

Speaker 5 I mean, I think you probably have to win the Super Bowl to have that be cemented. We've got the tackle against the Rams, the Titans Rams Super Bowl.
Yep. Yep.
All right, Hank, you're number six.

Speaker 6 Big Ben Rothlessberger.

Speaker 5 Oh,

Speaker 5 okay.

Speaker 5 Okay. I don't like that one.
It's a crazy one. It is.

Speaker 5 Also, his career is not done. Yeah.
The story has not been.

Speaker 5 Ben Rothsberger has the worst

Speaker 5 QBR

Speaker 5 for a Super Bowl winning quarterback.

Speaker 6 He also has twice as many Super Bowls as Aaron Rodgers.

Speaker 5 Yeah, that's true. That's also true.
I was about to do it, but I was like, but we did our prime numbers on Monday. But

Speaker 5 in that first Super Bowl that he got, he really didn't do shit. No, that's what I'm saying.

Speaker 5 I'll actually look it up. It's very funny.

Speaker 5 It's another case where it's hard to judge.

Speaker 6 People say the same thing about Brady for his first one.

Speaker 5 Well, no, this is the John Elway thing. John Elway's best best years were not his Super Bowl years.

Speaker 5 Like, he was very old at the end of the ⁇ he was still a very good quarterback, but it wasn't ⁇ those weren't.

Speaker 6 And Lightning got carried to his second one, too.

Speaker 5 But Hank, imagine if Tom Brady won that first Super Bowl, then won another Super Bowl six years later, and nothing after that. Would you put him on this list?

Speaker 5 No. Yeah.

Speaker 5 Okay, I got to find this game. Well, but Ben Rothsberger also ran into a buzzsaw.

Speaker 6 Like, you can't, if you're playing the Patriots ever since. Oh, because he played.

Speaker 5 I like that.

Speaker 5 That was smart to put him there then. Yeah.
That was good, yeah. Yeah.
You should have put him number two overall, actually. Yeah, you would be number one if it weren't for the Patriots.

Speaker 5 Notice that Hank does not have Peyton Manning on his list yet.

Speaker 5 All right, so

Speaker 5 Ben Rothsberger is your six. I have Favre.

Speaker 5 Okay, I have one, two, three, four, five. I have Favre also.
Okay, so we took the money. The only thing we have different right now is Rogers and Marino.
Yes.

Speaker 5 Okay, Hank, you're seven.

Speaker 5 Brett Favre winning three MVPs in a row is pretty crazy. It is sick.

Speaker 6 Yeah, he's just like, you think quarterback, he's

Speaker 5 quick on in the middle. Even though he did throw like 300-plus interceptions, which I'll happily point out.

Speaker 5 That's part of the reason he's on this list is because he threw all those interceptions and was still awesome and was probably the most fun quarterback to watch.

Speaker 5 Ben Rossberger in that Super Bowl win against the Seahawks. 9 for 21, 123 yards, 2 interceptions.
That's awesome. And the refs gave it to him, too.

Speaker 5 Dan Marino's got to watch that and be like, what the fuck? Yeah. I mean, honestly, the the refs should have been the offense through.

Speaker 5 Yes. All right.
You're number seven. Marino.
Okay.

Speaker 5 PFD, you have Marino. I have Marino seven.
I have Rodgers as my seven. Okay.
Eight.

Speaker 5 It's kind of crazy that the Packers have two top 10 quarterbacks all time and they only have two Super Bowls to show for it. Just saying.
That is wild.

Speaker 6 Eight, Steve Young.

Speaker 5 Okay. Interesting.
What's your eight? I've got Drew Brees. Same.
So PFD and I pretty much have the same list except for the Marino Rodgers. I think we're going to disagree with the next couple.

Speaker 5 okay number nine aaron rodgers okay number nine number nine

Speaker 5 russell wilson whoa okay russell number nine i have steve young okay all right

Speaker 5 and my number 10 pat mahomes same with me same with me yeah so we all had patrick mahomes number 10 was anybody else's 11 troy aikman uh 11 i had troy aikman somewhere he was somewhere around the list yeah i had him and thrown around um

Speaker 5 so wait did you not have steve young i did not have steve young okay so you don't have 11 as Steve Young. No.
Wow. Wait,

Speaker 5 which one of mine did you not have on the list? I don't have Russell Willis. You don't have Russell Willis on the list.
Okay. I don't have Russell Willis.

Speaker 5 What about if we were just as a unit together the most fun quarterbacks to watch?

Speaker 5 Mike Vick would be number one. I'd have Fav 1, Vic 2.

Speaker 5 Jameis is making a late push, but there's not enough tape of him. Jameis is pretty fun.
Jameis is pretty fun. Philip Rivers.

Speaker 5 Phil Rivers is definitely up there for fun quarterbacks. I'm trying to think of who else.
I mean, Manning was pretty fun when he was calling his own plays and just spouting a bunch of fun.

Speaker 5 Brock Osmiler. Matt Schaub.
Matt Schaub was great that one year. Matt Schaub was very fun.
I mean, Rex Grossman. Yeah, I mean, just throw deep.

Speaker 5 Just hope it works. RG3 that one year.
Yeah. Yeah.
I mean, Lamar Jackson, you could throw on the fun list. But, all right, so we didn't disagree that much.
I guess

Speaker 5 we should put these in a quote board, Liam, Bubba, and we'll, we'll put it out there because I'm sure people will discuss.

Speaker 5 It's a good way to get people to discuss, just debate quarterbacks in the middle of the quarantine. But either way, I think they did a good job.

Speaker 5 So you think that the NFL 100 list, you actually have a problem with it because Aaron Rodgers should be on there instead of Dan Marino. Yes.
Okay. That's the one change that I would make.
Okay.

Speaker 5 All right. And then

Speaker 5 where would you rank if we went to 100? Would you get Peyton Manning in there?

Speaker 6 He's probably top 20. He's squeaking at the end.
Where's Eli?

Speaker 6 Not on the list. Okay.

Speaker 5 Highest paid quarterback of all time. Yeah.

Speaker 5 He beat Tom Brady twice in Super Bowls.

Speaker 5 Giants, yeah. You should have him number one, actually, because he's so good that he beat the best quarterback twice.

Speaker 6 No, it's more of like a clock is always right. Broken clock is right twice a day type of thing.

Speaker 5 There we go. There we go.

Speaker 5 I also feel like they included Dan Marino on this list because they have to be nice to him. I just feel like Dan Marino.
You're not going to be making a list.

Speaker 5 You have to be like, yeah, Dan Marino, you were great. Remind people that he was.

Speaker 5 I'm going to find a Dan Marino highlight tape, and I'm going going to tweet it out because Dan Marino was fucking filthy. And unfortunately, his career didn't go the same way.
He also had

Speaker 5 the unfortunate ending of the worst playoff performance, I think, ever for his last game. So that's also a problem is that people remember Dan Marino.
People in their probably early 30s.

Speaker 5 Even our age probably remember their one big memory of Dan Marino is his last playoff game against the Jaguars. I'm going to pull it up.

Speaker 5 It's actually like the saddest thing to watch too because he was Damarino was one of those guys where like once his legs went, it was just kind of like it was tough to watch.

Speaker 5 He bounced back nicely though in Ace Manchura. So he won actually his second last game against the Seahawks in the playoffs.

Speaker 5 His last game against the Jacksonville Jaguars, the Miami Dolphins lost 62-7.

Speaker 5 And he went 11 for 25 with two interceptions. That's it's sad.
That's a sad way to go out.

Speaker 5 And like I said, like if he has, I don't know, if luck goes a different way for him and he has, you know, an awesome defense and a great running back at the end of his career, who knows?

Speaker 5 All right, let's do our hot seat cool throne, and then we'll get to Kendrick Perkins' great interview with Perk.

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Speaker 5 By the way, I don't want to give you more ammunition, PFT, but if you wanted to, for the Aaron Rodgers argument, you could say he also sat for four years. That's very true.

Speaker 5 I don't want to. I'm not going to.
I was about to say, but I felt like I was embarrassed. A good person would say that just to even help his nemesis in in Aaron Rodgers.

Speaker 5 I felt like I was embarrassing you with all my facts, so yeah, I rough pile on, but thanks for you saying it. All the facts about how many times he led the league in passing, which were zero.

Speaker 5 Well, he had a lot of leads. Five.
That's what happens when you have a lot of leads. You don't need to throw the ball in a fucking NFL that was very different.
All right. Hot seat, cool thrown.

Speaker 5 Hank, go.

Speaker 6 My hot seat is Coach Dougs.

Speaker 5 Ooh. And you, big cat.
What?

Speaker 5 Why? More sliders? Undefeated season.

Speaker 6 Sliders are gone.

Speaker 6 Sliders are gone, but I just feel like the tension has been building and you haven't got a loss out yet on Twitch stream, but you're playing in the championship tonight, so it's just, I feel like you're in the hot seat.

Speaker 6 ACC Championship if you don't get this victory.

Speaker 5 Yeah, ACC championship game on the Pardon My Take Twitch channel at 10 p.m. Eastern.

Speaker 5 The haters,

Speaker 5 it's very funny watching the haters leave whenever I get a lead and then watching it grow when it's like a close game.

Speaker 5 But the haters, I feel like we have the Twitch haters are like young kids and they don't understand.

Speaker 5 PFT is actually a master in this, That for to get maximum suicidal big cat, you need to let me win early and lose late. If you had lost like your second or third game, that's no fun.

Speaker 5 You're just like, okay, well, no, that kind of sucked. That was fun for a little bit.
But once you really get your hopes up, that's when it's great to pull the carpet out from under right.

Speaker 5 So they're not thinking long term. What are the haters saying in the chat? They just do F a lot, which I guess, Hank, you were wrong about what F means.
Yeah. Well, I was.

Speaker 5 I had you on my hot seat, but you can address it right now.

Speaker 6 So, yeah, I mean, I I was just saying it's funny when it happens because it is fucking hilarious, like, when Big Cat throws an interception and it's just flooded with F's.

Speaker 6 All I was saying was it was very funny, and I didn't realize it was a thing on Twitch.

Speaker 6 Apparently, it goes back to an old Call of Duty game where in the campaign mode, someone died, and on the screen, it popped up. It said, press F to pay respects.

Speaker 6 So, the whole thing is kind of like making fun of that original Call of Duty thing, which was meant to be dead serious. Like, you're pressing F to pay respects for a

Speaker 5 video game character. It was part of gameplay where where you're at the funeral of a fellow Navy SEAL or whatever, and you're at the casket and it says press F.

Speaker 5 This might be like a Berenstein-Bears thing where my mind is wrong about a memory that it thinks that it had. I always thought it was press X to pay respects.

Speaker 5 That's why I didn't think that you were wrong when you said that. No, that's F, I guess.
Someone show me the screenshot.

Speaker 5 Yeah, so ACC championship game tonight, and they're calling me Fraud State University.

Speaker 5 They make fun of me because I only run like four plays, but they made me take off the sliders so I can't. Like, I just run the ball.
Yeah, just stop it if there's nothing I can do.

Speaker 5 If you have a problem with it, I'm scared to throw it, and I just throw interceptions. I threw like four picks the other night.
So, your cool throne?

Speaker 6 My cool throne is just like sports radio hosts and mending relationships.

Speaker 6 Colin Coward wished Baker Mayfield a happy birthday on Twitter today.

Speaker 5 Oh, shit, I forgot to wish him a happy birthday. Can you do it from the PMT account real quick?

Speaker 6 Sure. Why should I just copy exactly what Colin Coward wrote?

Speaker 5 Yeah, but make one word like a lot nicer. Yeah.

Speaker 6 Well, he said, happy. Oh, wait, that's my account.
I've never done that before.

Speaker 6 Happy birthday, Baker Mayfield, party. Wait, what?

Speaker 5 There's no way that he was just nice about it.

Speaker 6 Happy birthday, Baker Mayfield, big year ahead. No, that's all he said.

Speaker 6 Huge year ahead. What should I say?

Speaker 5 Huge year ahead. Yeah, yeah.
Happy baby.

Speaker 6 Yeah. And then PFT, I didn't even ask you further.
I was just waiting for the show, but you just mentioned earlier, like, hey, did you guys see Skip and Stephen A like flirting with each other? Yeah.

Speaker 6 What is that about?

Speaker 5 So they're making eyes from across the room at each other.

Speaker 5 Somebody, well, Skip Bayless started this out by just saying,

Speaker 5 Favre, greater than sign, greater than sign, greater than, probably about 30 or 40 greater than signs, and then Rodgers debating up next at Undisputed.

Speaker 5 And, or is it Undisputed? What's the name of the stupid show? Whatever. Okay, whatever this is.

Speaker 5 Yeah, so Skip Bayless was just going out there casually in the middle of April, dropping Favre is greater than Rogers takes, takes,

Speaker 5 which you would probably agree with based on your list. Yes, I do agree with that.
And then somebody tagged Stephen A. Smith in it and said something like, is this man drunk or high or both?

Speaker 5 And Stephen A. Smith quote tweeted and said, Lord.

Speaker 5 So Stephen A. Smith is aware of Skip's takes.
And that Lord is doing a lot of work there because

Speaker 5 it's hidden behind his version of being horny, which is like, I'm sick of debating against Max Kellerman because Max Kellerman doesn't throw this type of red meat at me that gets me going.

Speaker 5 So I actually had

Speaker 5 that on my hot seat. Max was going to be on my hot seat.

Speaker 5 So I think, you know, it's been our theory on this show that Skip and Stephen A. Smith will eventually get back together.
I agree. They miss each other because Max is not the worthy foe.

Speaker 5 And if you're a kid out there that never got to see those two guys debate each other, man,

Speaker 5 it's two Titans of industry going at it. It was must-see TV.
Yes. And

Speaker 5 it's going to have to be Skip going back to ESPN. That's the problem.
Yeah, that's true. I don't think Stephen A is going anywhere.

Speaker 5 You have to throw the bag at Skip and immediately ask him to take a 15% pay cut. Skip living in New York City.
Oh, my God, I would love that. Shit.
All right, what's your cool throne?

Speaker 5 So my cool throne is the alpha males who go back through someone's tweet history the night before the draft and dig up old tweets because you guys, it's your time to shine. Very cool.

Speaker 5 I actually think there's nothing lamer than plotting ahead and trying to fuck up the biggest night of somebody's life because they they had some weird tweets.

Speaker 5 Like, I think it was a couple years ago, the Eagles drafted somebody and they had said, like, Philadelphia sucks and is filled with F-words or something like that.

Speaker 5 Back, like, seriously, nine years ago or six years ago, something like that.

Speaker 5 If you're not, if you're 13 and you're not tweeting out crazy stuff, you're not taking enough chances. And that to me is even more of a red flag than getting...
Bro, Callahan? Well, within reason.

Speaker 5 No one's going to his party? Within reason.

Speaker 5 As long as it's not like racial, homophobic, sexist type stuff. But But, like, I think it was DeAnthony Thomas had a lot of cool shit.

Speaker 5 People tried to nail him on that. I love kissing titties.
I love kissing. Exactly.

Speaker 5 They tried to get Mitch on that one, too. Exactly.
But it's going to happen, and it's going to suck when it happens. Yeah.
It's going to be awkward for everybody.

Speaker 5 So, in advance, I'm putting one in your earhole. Okay.
My hot seat is Dave Gettelman's Senses.

Speaker 5 So I don't know if you saw Dave Gettleman was bemoaning these virtual visits that he has to do, probably just because he has to get in front of a computer.

Speaker 5 But he said, obviously, when we would go to workouts, a lot of times the night before, our coach and scout that would be at the pro day would take one, two, or three of the players out to dinner and have some conversation that way.

Speaker 5 We're losing the personal touch points. We have the visual touch point, but we're really missing out on the personal touch point when you can smell or feel a guy.

Speaker 5 Smelling and feeling. So

Speaker 5 poor Dave Gettleman's senses don't have any smelling or feeling of what they're doing. But tasting a guy.
Yeah.

Speaker 5 Why not?

Speaker 6 I think we've got to embrace debate. Sorry to interrupt, but Skip just tweeted a program alert about tomorrow's Undisputed, which is the name of the show.
Interrupted, yeah.

Speaker 6 Shannon and me at 9.30 as we debate what we believe and don't believe about the size of Friday Night Gathering at Dak's home.

Speaker 5 Oh, okay. Embrace debate.
Jesus.

Speaker 6 What was the size of the gathering? Wow.

Speaker 5 There needs to be a full serial done

Speaker 5 on that party that they had. Damn.
I think it was, my over-under is 15.5. I don't believe it was 30.
I don't think it's the over. I think it was about 20, 20.
Jack said it was under 10. No way.

Speaker 5 Well, I think what he means by that is under 10 Cowboys. Yeah.
And then probably two stripes. Or under 10 chicks.
Yeah.

Speaker 5 Well, no, under 10 dudes, and then probably two chicks for every dude that was there. Yeah.
Yeah. All right.
My cool throne is

Speaker 5 the Niners. Because they saved lives by not winning the Super Bowl.
That was a report that came out.

Speaker 5 I used, obviously, the spin zone that the Bears saved all the lives by not drafting Mahomes because it was funny. They were like, the Niners desert or save lives by not winning a Super Bowl.

Speaker 5 Alternate headline is Patrick Mahomes is so fucking good that he can save lives in other cities.

Speaker 5 But you're saying that the Bears... Not drafting Patrick Mahomes did the ultimate sacrifice.
Because Chicago is so much better than that. Never celebrate.
Never celebrate anything. Never.

Speaker 5 Tear down the Jordan statue because he probably endangered more lives in the flu game. It's Mitch.
Tear that down. It's Mitch.
Put up a statue of Mitch and Cody. Yeah, and then my other cool throne is

Speaker 5 we have

Speaker 5 is us because we're not gonna, I think we're not gonna do the bike ride on this Friday. We're gonna do it all Friday.
We've got to do it a Friday when it's not raining in 40 degrees.

Speaker 5 There's a weather alert. Yeah, we can't be unsafe.
I don't mind football weather going out there in 40 degrees, but when you add in the rain to that 30 miles on a tandem.

Speaker 5 There's a pandemic. I don't know if you looked around, there's a pandemic.
We don't need to go out there and compromise our immune system when we're under attack. That's true.

Speaker 5 So we're doing what the CDC, Dr. Fauci, our personal friend, has said.
So off Friday, we're going to be doing it. Probably next Friday.
If the weather's nicer. If the weather's nicer.

Speaker 5 So, yeah, 40 degrees and the rain. That's a little bit too.
Except.

Speaker 5 You'd probably be wanting me to be in the front if it was raining

Speaker 5 to absorb some of the rain.

Speaker 5 Yeah, but then you would like flip your hair and then whip me with it. I would do that.
I would whip my hair back and forth. Yeah.
Right. So we're going to do it, though.
We're going to do it.

Speaker 5 Guarantee.

Speaker 5 Let's get to Kendrick Perkins. Real quick, with your Dave Gettelman thing.
Yeah. Did you see the picture of him that came out of him pretending that he was at a computer? No.

Speaker 5 It was like him at a desk where a computer definitely usually isn't, and he's just staring at us that he can take a picture of a company. He's calling out the A-rod.
Yeah,

Speaker 5 being like, look at him. He's working.
He's adapting to these times. He's absolutely not adapting.
And I saw that the NFL draft was going to be conducted.

Speaker 5 We already knew that it was going to be a virtual draft.

Speaker 5 Then they added in the wrinkle that because there are so many GMs that are technically, technologically illiterate, there would also be a conference call that would be open at the time that you could just yell out what your pick was if you couldn't get it in in the correct methods.

Speaker 5 I will pay $5,000 to get access to that conference call on draft night. Okay.
Out of my own pocket. Wow.
If I can get access, and I'm not talking about like just the open line that I can listen to.

Speaker 5 We want to be able to talk. I want to be able to make fake draft picks for the New York football job.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. All right, I'll split that with you.
Okay, you don't have to do it all. $2,500.

Speaker 5 I'm going to do $2,500. $2,500.
I'm going to do $2,500, and Big Cat's going to match it. Yes, there we go.
We've got matching. And Hank, you're going to match.

Speaker 5 Oh, no, you already gave away your trump bucks. All right, let's go to Kendrick Perkins.
PFT, you got an ad.

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Speaker 5 And now, Kendrick Perkins.

Speaker 5 Okay, we now welcome on a very special guest. It is NBA Champion.

Speaker 5 You can see him on ESPN all the time. You can see him on Twitter every single day.
One of my favorite reply guys

Speaker 5 out there at Kendrick Perkins. It is Kendrick Perkins, Perk.
Thank you for joining us. We appreciate it.
I got to start before we talk basketball. I got to ask the most important question.
Quarantine.

Speaker 5 How much was the final bill that your son racked up on your credit card for Fortnite? Because I saw that story that

Speaker 5 he put $16,000 on your credit card bill.

Speaker 5 Is it still climbing? Or what's going on in the perk house?

Speaker 12 Man, BK. Hey, listen, first of all, I appreciate y'all having me on.
You know, we way past due

Speaker 12 for having me on y'all show. And I want to thank y'all for having me on.
I love what y'all are doing with the show. It's a fantastic show, and I just want to thank y'all.

Speaker 12 Listen, these kids are driving me crazy. Not only, I mean, you know, they ran up my credit card bill.

Speaker 12 So what i did now is i took my credit card number off their cell phone so i made their own iclouds on iTunes account so what they have now is they have they have prepaid credit cards so now they have to come ask me to put money on their cards but they can't get on see the thing is they can't get on now they made it worse for themselves because they can't get on video games during the week they're only allowed allowed to get on video games during the weekend.

Speaker 12 And the max that they could spend on the video games now is $10.

Speaker 5 And that's the week for the weekend. That's nothing.

Speaker 5 But I mean, it's smart for you to put them on an expense account, but what you should have done is you should have just gone out there and made like $18,000 worth of purchases on a Fortnite for yourself and then kicked their asses in it.

Speaker 12 Right.

Speaker 5 Hey, listen, I thought about it.

Speaker 12 I swear I thought about it. But you know what? I got my money back, though.
Oh, I did get my money back.

Speaker 12 Yeah, because it's a rule that if you're not over 16 years old, that it's some type of rule that you can get your money back. So I got every dollar back.
I disputed those charges.

Speaker 5 Okay, nice. All right, so that's good resolution.

Speaker 5 I had to ask that first because I feel like that is the most pressing issue is the Fortnite purchases in the Perkins household while everyone's shelter in place.

Speaker 12 Yes, God bless man.

Speaker 5 It was crazy.

Speaker 5 I want to get this right off the jump real quick. You did say that you're overdue for coming on the show.
We've been trying to get you on here for like six, eight months, something like that.

Speaker 5 You are probably our producer, Hank's, like, probably top four favorite basketball player of all time. And he says that he's been hounding you, but you've been ghosting him.

Speaker 5 Would you like to address those allegations that Hank has made towards you?

Speaker 12 Yes, I do got to address Hank. Now, look, Hank, I appreciate you, you know, being being a fan of mine, man, and I really appreciate you finally getting me on the show.

Speaker 12 But I only heard from Hank at least once or twice. He haven't been hounding me for six,

Speaker 12 eight weeks. I'm not hard to find.

Speaker 5 Yeah, I think PFT exaggerated that.

Speaker 6 He exaggerated that a little bit.

Speaker 5 Well, you mentioned it on the show.

Speaker 5 Hank usually has a lot of.

Speaker 12 I love Hank because I'm one of his favorite players. So he gets a pass.

Speaker 12 I take the fault at this, but I've been anxious to get on the show, though.

Speaker 5 Okay. All right.
So you squashed the beef there. Hank, do you have your one question? Because we know Hank had a question.
Didn't you want to ask a question about

Speaker 5 the finals? Go ahead.

Speaker 5 I got a million questions.

Speaker 6 I guess, I mean, the one I told them to ask, but is how many fouls do you think you actually have committed in your career?

Speaker 5 Good question.

Speaker 12 Fouls, fouls, Hank, or technical fouls.

Speaker 5 Because you know, fouls. You know what?

Speaker 12 If the game ended and I had less than four fouls, I felt like I didn't do my job.

Speaker 5 I like that. I like that.
I think what Hank's getting to, though, is you, I don't think I've ever seen you put your hand up and say, that one's on me. Like when you get called for a foul,

Speaker 5 it's like, no, that wasn't really a foul. But then at the end of the game, you accept it.

Speaker 12 But you know what? You got to debate it.

Speaker 12 See, you got to play the mind games with the referees because sometimes they'll let you get away with fouls. You know what I'm saying?

Speaker 12 So if you debate a few, then they'll let you get away with the ones that they were supposed to call.

Speaker 12 Because it was a few times that I was supposed to foul out the game, but since I argued so many calls they were like oh you know I'm gonna let this one ride you know they get tired of hearing your mouth yeah you got to play that mind game with them hey that's brilliant yeah I didn't think about it that way so all right so going off of that because you you were a physical player I'm always curious about you know

Speaker 5 players in different eras and like we had like Joe Harris from the Nets in a couple months ago and it was right after he signed his deal and we're like hey like you realize if this was 20 years ago, you probably wouldn't have had a spot in the NBA because the three-point shot wasn't the way it is now.

Speaker 5 You were probably in the correct era that, like, if you came along today, do you think that there would be a spot for you on an NBA roster in terms of like an old school center?

Speaker 12 No, not at all. I would probably be playing overseas.

Speaker 12 I'm glad I came along when I did because, you know, the game changed tremendously.

Speaker 12 Not only as a big, but hold on, but let me tell y'all something now i got a lot of i got a lot of i got a complete package in my game doc rivers just made me into a role player at an early age because we needed to win the championship right see doc rivers stopped me from doc rivers kind of stopped i love dr death but he'll tell you see he stopped me from really being a full-time all-star because i had to buy into being a role player to win the championship.

Speaker 12 But now, in all seriousness, nah, I wouldn't have made it. Because, you you know, the highest my vertical ever been was like 28 inches.

Speaker 12 And nowadays, if you're a center, you got to have a 40-inch vert, you got to be able to run the floor like a gazelle. And that's that's definitely me.

Speaker 12 I, you know, I'm at my best speed, I may be a 5-240. So, no way, no way I would have been able to keep up with the pace that these guys play with today.

Speaker 12 And, you know, but back in the day, yeah, that was my style.

Speaker 12 Physical, playing through elbow playing through the elbows and low block area you know games the score of 90 to 88 final no running up and down here you take a three nine's my turn here you go score a layup my turn score 178 to 180 when the game in

Speaker 5 that wouldn't be i wouldn't have fit it in too good i appreciate that and and like thinking about it even more i actually think that you timed your career perfectly because thinking about it, even like if you were in the 90s, you wouldn't have been paid what you were paid.

Speaker 5 Like, you were actually the perfect time for your skill set to maximize the value that you got in the NBA.

Speaker 12 I agree 100%.

Speaker 12 You know what? And

Speaker 12 that's what every, you know, every agent tells their player the same thing, unless you're a megastar, a superstar. Timing is everything.

Speaker 12 Timing is everything,

Speaker 12 especially when it comes down to sports contracts and things like that. Timing is everything.
That's how some summers

Speaker 12 you see a guy get $100 million. You're like, hold on, how did he get $100 million? Because he came up at the right time.

Speaker 5 Do you think that there's a chance that the league is going to kind of swing back at some point?

Speaker 5 The pendulum is going to go back more to a game where a big center can just body people up and thrive, or is it just going to keep being spread out like this for the foreseeable future?

Speaker 12 Well,

Speaker 12 you know what's going to have to happen. One,

Speaker 12 a team is going to have to win one or two championships doing it the traditional way with a big center. Two,

Speaker 12 there's going to have to be an upcoming young player, and I think I have him, and my son, Kingston Perkins, that's going to have to change the game, and he's going to be probably the next shack where he's going to have to force the game to go back to where it wants to be.

Speaker 12 Because just think about it. The game really changed when Steph Curry came along.
Steph Curry, Golden State Warriors, they kind of changed the whole dynamic of

Speaker 12 centers and power forwards. Because, you know, they were the first team really to go extra small with a 6'6 Draymond Green as center.

Speaker 12 And, you know, Stephen them shooting threes right as soon as they cross half court. So, you know, at the end of the day, I think it's going to take a team to win a championship the traditional way.

Speaker 12 And I see Greg Popovich, he tried to stick with it, but it's not working right now. So I think it might take another, let me see, Kingston 8.
Yeah, it'll take another 10 years.

Speaker 12 So once Thone Perkins is there, it'll get back to the norm.

Speaker 5 I'm watching him right now. He's a beast.

Speaker 5 Is this the kid who spent $16,000 on Fortnite?

Speaker 12 No, it was both of them.

Speaker 5 I have to swear y'all also. Okay, okay.

Speaker 12 But both of them, yeah so they was what happened was was that they wasn't just spending it on themselves it's a group of them and they was buying their cousins their friends i mean they were just i mean they was having it their way and i did not even know because you know i i use a certain credit card you know and i because that's the way i'm able to keep up on my budget but this particular day i was rushing out the house and it was nighttime and i actually was going getting a pipe pint of cookies and cream ice cream.

Speaker 12 And I said, Well, this is this card right here. Let me grab this.
I get to the store, and she's like, It's the client. I'm like, Well, I haven't touched this credit card in like two weeks.

Speaker 12 So I call the people and they're like, It's maxed out. First of all, my limit on my credit card is $15,000.
So they let them go over an extra thousand dollars, which I didn't even tell anybody.

Speaker 12 So I'm like, How did I get $16,000? So I go back and look at the credit card statement, and it was just Fortnite. It was video games, this $269, $300 here, $300 there.
I'm like, what?

Speaker 5 Because he had an excuse when you were like, Kingston, why is my credit card bill being charged $16,000 for Fortnite? What was his reason for that?

Speaker 12 Well, you know what? I never had the conversation with him. So look, let me tell you, my wife, she is the enforcer around the house, right? My wife is.
She, I mean,

Speaker 12 she runs a tight ship around here. She keeps all four of my kids in line so she they went to school this is right before they uh

Speaker 12 right before school was let out so what we did was we went to the porn shop and we went and bought a play station they had a play station and uh an old one for like 30 bucks so we went and bought one that looked exactly like this

Speaker 12 and we threw it in the pool

Speaker 12 and when they got home from school what when they got home from school we hid they we hid the one that they had because they was punished but we when they got home from school we made them go out there and look at it and we left it in there for like a week and every time they would go they would literally break down in tears like i'm like no exaggeration i'm talking about falling out in tears and i i was loving every second of it that's so so good um all right so let's talk a little basketball uh what do you have any idea when it's coming back i know you've probably been asked this a million times but do you have any idea when it's coming back?

Speaker 5 And if you were Kendrick Perkins still playing, would you be willing to go live in a biodome or a bubble to get the NBA season back?

Speaker 12 I'm depressed, right? I mean, you know,

Speaker 12 I need basketball. Like, well, I want basketball back on.
Like, I want... my grandma sweet potato pies.
I can't have it. I'm on a diet.
That's how bad I want basketball.

Speaker 12 But at the end of the day, I thought I was like, for a while, every day I was waking up, I was optimistic, like, you know, man, we got the best commissioner in sports and Adam Silver.

Speaker 12 The NBA is going to find a way. This coronavirus is not going in.
But every day I kept waking up, I'm thinking tomorrow is going to be better and it's not.

Speaker 12 So now I've come to the conclusion, since we're, what, about five weeks in, I've come to the conclusion, I'm like, hold on, the coronavirus is getting worse. People are dying.
And now

Speaker 12 I honestly don't see the NBA coming back this season. It's going to be hard

Speaker 12 because guys are not able to work out right now. The only how you could get in basketball shape is playing basketball.

Speaker 12 And you would have to have like two weeks of training camp, a couple preseason games. Like, you would have to do so much to prep guys up.
to be able to go out there and compete at a high level.

Speaker 12 Because just think, we were heading into the playoffs.

Speaker 12 So guys were already peaking and you know they were in in in in round form and playoff mode their bodies were feeling great they were ready but you know if me personally

Speaker 12 after what happened last yesterday to call Anthony Town

Speaker 12 mother guard rest her soul I couldn't see myself leaving my family right now

Speaker 12 to go and play an isolated area or in the bubble if the NBA call. I would just, you know, know because right now we got to look at what's more important.

Speaker 12 What's more important right now is your health, safety, and your family.

Speaker 12 And as a man of the house, the provider, the protector, there's no way I don't care, you know, my father-in-law here, as a man of my house, I can't leave my family during this time.

Speaker 5 Yeah, that makes sense in an honest answer. It does, because as fans, you know, we want basketball back just as much.
Like, it's the one thing that we need. You know, we need sports.

Speaker 5 We miss sports just like you do. um, and we want sports to come back pretty much at any cost.

Speaker 5 But you have to take into account the fact that they're, you know, they're human beings that have families.

Speaker 5 And while it might be fun to picture them play on a cruise ship, and we like to talk about these weird ways that maybe we could get sports back, at the end of the day, you have to remember that they are putting things in jeopardy by trying to do that for our entertainment.

Speaker 5 So I agree with you on that.

Speaker 5 I had a question here about Rudy Gobert.

Speaker 5 So this whole thing, really, the the spark that set everything off was when Rudy tested positive for coronavirus at that jazz game after he had touched all the microphones and joked around about it and stuff.

Speaker 5 Do you see Rudy being welcomed back to any locker room? Like, hypothetically, if if J.R.

Speaker 5 Smith had done something like this, I just drew that name out of the hat randomly, but if if you had a teammate that had kind of put you in a similar position, uh, would that person be welcomed back into the locker room the next season?

Speaker 12 Oh, yeah, for sure. You got to.
I mean, at the end of the day, you know, he didn't know no better.

Speaker 12 And the thing about Rudy that I applaud him because I was pissed off at him because the thing that I applaud Rudy so much for is that

Speaker 12 he apologized several times, you know, maybe a hundred times. You know, he felt really bad.

Speaker 12 He donated a lot of money to the cause. But also, on the flip side of it, Rudy,

Speaker 12 he, I mean,

Speaker 12 he did an immature act, but it also, you know, set the tone for the world. Like, hey, this is serious.

Speaker 12 Let's take note to this because after the incident, then the NBA led the charge and shut down sports. And from there, it was a spiral effect.

Speaker 12 And everyone else was like, hold on, it's time to shut down the world.

Speaker 12 So at the end of the day, Rudy was kind of like a bad guy, but he was almost like a savior. And I wouldn't say it to that nature of Jesus Christ, but

Speaker 12 he possibly saved some lives by, you know, doing an immature act.

Speaker 12 So, I mean, it is some good that came out of it, but at the end of the day, it's not his fault because the NBA, we all been knowing about this coronavirus.

Speaker 12 you know it's been brought to our attention months beforehand and to me i think us as not just the nba but the whole world dropped the ball on this, and we didn't get ahead of this like we should have.

Speaker 5 Yeah. Rudy Guberra's Jesus is an interesting analogy.
Because Rudy's a good defensive player. He doesn't get crossed up.

Speaker 5 But I do like the spin zone that he might be responsible for saving as many lives as anybody. during this crisis.
He had 49ers. That did, yeah.

Speaker 5 Him and the 49ers and the Bears for not drafting the homes.

Speaker 5 Yeah, that is an interesting spin zone. I kind of like that.
But Perk, I I also think that the Perk that we knew three years ago would have come at Rudy a little bit harder.

Speaker 5 You seem like you're like a little kinder and gentler. Now you got some perspective on it.
No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.

Speaker 12 I didn't say I wouldn't have told him anything about it. I definitely would have had to speak my mind and tell him, like, man, man, what the hell would you think?

Speaker 12 You know, I would have had to read him as right.

Speaker 5 I'm still perk.

Speaker 12 Now, I'm not soft, but I'm saying eventually I would have got over it and we would have just had to rock it out.

Speaker 12 You know, he would have still been welcome, but he would have had to hit my mouth for damn sure.

Speaker 5 Okay. All right.
So going off of that, you're still perk. Who are you beefing with right now on Twitter? Because I feel like every time you look up,

Speaker 5 you got a new person that you're beefing with.

Speaker 12 Well, look, you know, here's the thing.

Speaker 12 I have time now since I'm retired. When I'm not working, I have time.
So if I tweet something, I check my mentions.

Speaker 12 And if I see somebody say something to me that I don't like, then hey, I'm going to say something back to them. So it's whoever wants to smoke because I got time.

Speaker 5 Okay.

Speaker 12 If they want to smoke, I'm bringing the five.

Speaker 5 Okay. All right.
I like that perspective. Now, do you ever look back on your old Twitter beefs and you're like, what was I thinking? Like, that was maybe not.

Speaker 5 Like when you said Mark Jackson deserved more credit than Steve Kerr for the Warriors? Like, that was a bad take.

Speaker 12 No, that was a great take.

Speaker 5 That was a great take.

Speaker 12 And that was what it was, it was facts. And

Speaker 12 sometimes people just don't like to hear the truth. Mark Jackson built that coach over there.
Mark Jackson is on record calling the Splash Brothers the Splash Brothers.

Speaker 12 He's on record talking noise saying, hey, I got the best two shooters in the world. Try me.

Speaker 5 Try me. Right.

Speaker 12 Please just have an easy struck goal.

Speaker 5 Right. But then they went from the sixth seed to the NBA champions in the year after that winning 73 games.
So that feels like that might have had something to do with Steve Kerr.

Speaker 12 They was destined to do that.

Speaker 5 Steph Curry was on the rise.

Speaker 12 Clay Thompson was on the rise. They had to get David Lee out the way so that they could

Speaker 12 get Draymond into the starting lineup.

Speaker 12 That wasn't on Mark Jackson. Mark Jackson didn't pay David Lee $50 plus million dollars.

Speaker 5 Okay.

Speaker 12 That's why Draymond wasn't playing.

Speaker 5 All right.

Speaker 5 So

Speaker 5 I can't move your mind off that one. What about when you called Kevin Durant a coward? A coward's move.

Speaker 5 Are you still on that one? Yeah.

Speaker 12 Do y'all disagree with that?

Speaker 5 Not necessarily.

Speaker 5 Yeah, probably not. So that's my thing.
Probably not.

Speaker 12 But that's my thing. That's my thing.
You know what? I shouldn't have said that, but it wasn't like I told a lie. I just said every, I just...
I just spoke.

Speaker 12 I just said what everyone else had been thinking anyway.

Speaker 5 Okay. So, yeah.

Speaker 12 I mean,

Speaker 12 because think about it. If

Speaker 12 when you're considered a great, just, okay, what if LeBron James would have went and joined the 73 and 9 team?

Speaker 5 Yeah, no, I agree with you.

Speaker 5 So, like, what you said, I think a lot of people were thinking and had said, what about, like, Kevin Durant, his response?

Speaker 5 He basically put you in a body bag. He toe-clipped you.

Speaker 5 He put who in a body bag.

Speaker 5 No, that's not true. You said Big Hat is misremembering.
I'm reading right here. You said, all right, Kendrick Perkins, you said, KD lost in the second round without Russ when I was there.

Speaker 5 So what that means? And KD responded, yeah. And our starting center, Kendrick Perkins averaged a whopping two and three during that series.
You played hard, though, Champ.

Speaker 6 And what did Perkins respond?

Speaker 5 He said, you got the champ thing right. Facts on the averages and facts on the champ part, too.
Okay, so you owned up to it.

Speaker 6 And Doc Rivers, as he said earlier, didn't give him the chance to be a true story.

Speaker 5 True star. True.

Speaker 5 Also true. Listen, also Perk does a lot of stuff that doesn't show up in the stat sheet.

Speaker 5 I love all these because you give Perk, you're giving us, like the people who are sitting at home, you know, blogs to write and things to laugh at.

Speaker 5 It was just, I thought Kevin Durant probably got the best of you when he had that response.

Speaker 12 No, really, he got the best of himself because what ended up happening was that he shouldn't have even commented that day because it was Russell Westbrook Day. But now, since we're bringing it up,

Speaker 12 I don't know if y'all had time, but I know y'all been seeing the videos of the old Celtic days, you know, 08 Celtics and stuff like that, right?

Speaker 12 Did you see the game that they showed last Thursday, game five, Eastern Conference against Detroit, where me and KG dominated the Wallace Brothers?

Speaker 5 Hang on, shaking his head, yes.

Speaker 5 He watched that.

Speaker 12 Okay, but yeah, because before I got to Oklahoma City, I was a pretty good player.

Speaker 12 But then when you go to a team where two players are taking 75 out of the 95 shots, it's kind of hard to average more than five points.

Speaker 5 True.

Speaker 12 But you know what? That's not easy to hear it up.

Speaker 5 I like, listen, Perk, if anything, I'm learning that I love the way your brain works because you're almost like

Speaker 5 you got wins all over the place.

Speaker 12 Yeah, I try to be.

Speaker 5 I try to be. But you know, see,

Speaker 12 you know what's crazy? It was actually a reporter from Boston who I was commenting to because I said,

Speaker 12 let's go back to that day. I said that Russell Westbrook was the greatest player,

Speaker 12 the greatest Thunder ever. I didn't say he was the best player to ever play for the Thunder, but he's the greatest Thunder player.

Speaker 5 So, okay. You did say he was the best player to ever put on an Oklahoma City Thunder jersey.
I want to agree with this take, Perk.

Speaker 5 Can you just really quick explain to me the difference between being the greatest Thunder player and then the best Thunder player?

Speaker 12 To me, the greatest is like

Speaker 12 a person who like went with the franchise held it down you know uh put up some great numbers when you hear the name thunder you think of this person yeah you think of you think of russell westbrook okay because kd left he left the door open it's just the same it's no different than the toronto raptors like i think kyle larry is the greatest raptor of all time, but is he the best player that ever put on a Raptors jersey?

Speaker 12 No.

Speaker 5 Okay.

Speaker 12 But you could say that he's Mr. Raptor.
So

Speaker 12 the so the reporter from Boston says, I can't believe you, Perk. Russ never got out of the first round.
So I said, what does that mean?

Speaker 12 KD, when he was here, he never got out of the second round without Russ.

Speaker 12 Basically, they needed each other. I wasn't shooting a slug at KD.
KD was just looking so deep into it.

Speaker 12 And he was so butthurt that Oklahoma City was giving this bigger, rolling the red cups out out for Russell Westbrook that he couldn't stand it now the bigger man than KD should have been hey man congratulations to Russell Westbrook hope he get everything and more he deserves that great welcome welcoming and okay see blah blah and people would have been like hey KD man that's you all right with me but instead he didn't take the high road he took the low road but that's neither here or there I mean the way you talk these things out I have to say you make a lot of sense that's what it was I wasn't actually, KD was so far off my mind, I wasn't shooting a shot at him.

Speaker 12 I happened to go on the jump that day, and I was praising Russell Westbrook for his accomplishments. He was going back to OKC.
I knew how the Thunder felt about him.

Speaker 12 He lead the organization in every statistical category. By the way, points, rebounds, assists, steals, games played, minutes played.
He lead them in every category. So how can he not be be Mr.

Speaker 12 Thunder?

Speaker 5 Okay, yeah, I agree with that now. Yeah, like that makes a lot of sense.
Greatest versus best. I think we can probably take that argument and put some legs through and adapt it to any team out there.

Speaker 5 Now, what do you think about KD now that he's able to sleep at night because he left the Warriors and now he's on the Nets?

Speaker 5 Do you think that's his team, or do you think that's another weak move teaming up with

Speaker 5 Kyrie?

Speaker 12 No, I think it was a great move for him.

Speaker 12 Not a great move. I think it was a good good move to me.

Speaker 12 Now, because to me, even when KD won his championships, he still, when you see in his body, like when you win a championship, that's like one of the best feelings in the world for us in sports.

Speaker 12 Like, I still visualize that Boston parade and everything about OA, right?

Speaker 12 And when you look at KD's face, it was just like, this is this is like he wasn't,

Speaker 12 he almost wasn't fulfilled. Like,

Speaker 12 it didn't like

Speaker 12 it was like this all it is right here and to me with him going to

Speaker 12 the next i think it's going to be his team it is his team um i actually think he's going to win the mvp next year on top of that um

Speaker 12 no matter what kd was the best player on the warriors that's no debate the warriors recruited the hell out of kd we all know this but at the end of the day

Speaker 12 when you think of the Warriors, still and all, who are you going to say first?

Speaker 5 Yeah, it's Steph. Yeah.
Yeah, no, you're right.

Speaker 12 So, you know, whether I would have went to the Knicks or the Knicks, I mean, that's not my decision. KD made his decision.
I'm okay with it. But I would have probably went to the Knicks.

Speaker 12 That's still the most valuable franchise, and I would have went there and turned everything around. I mean, but either way, I'm happy for him.
Me and Kev, we all right.

Speaker 12 We good people, so we don't have no beef. So, you know, I just hope that

Speaker 12 he gets healthy, which I think he is. And I got him picked to win the MVP because one thing I know about him,

Speaker 12 him being away from the game of basketball this long, is killing him.

Speaker 5 Yeah, absolutely. Absolutely.
All right, so

Speaker 5 we got to the bottom of those two beefs. Now, last one I had that I wanted to ask you about: when was the last time you spoke to Ray Allen?

Speaker 12 It's been about maybe a year. So, so the beef, you know, with Ray and

Speaker 12 the Celtics and us, I don't have a beef with Ray. The beef was

Speaker 12 when I was gone. I was already in Oklahoma City, but I haven't spoken to Ray.
KG is my big brother. That's who I rock with.

Speaker 12 I don't have no hard feelings against Ray, but my loyalty is to Kevin Garnett.

Speaker 12 And so if, you know, if him and Ray decide to talk, then, hey, me and Ray could be cool. Other than that, if I got him, if you're forcing me to pick sides, I'm rolling with KG all day long.

Speaker 5 What is it about KG that made you have such a strong bond with him?

Speaker 12 Because that's my big brother. He's been loyal to me since day one,

Speaker 12 since he first came to the Celtics, and he's still loyal to me to this day. I could call him for anything, advice.

Speaker 12 go to his house, just you know, hang out with him. We go to dinners.
We talk every other day.

Speaker 12 He's always dropping knowledge on me. We talk about our personal problems.

Speaker 12 That is the big brother that I never had.

Speaker 12 So, you know, my loyalty is towards KG, and I'm rocking with him to the casket close.

Speaker 5 What did you think about his performance in the Uncut Gyms?

Speaker 5 Good question.

Speaker 12 I thought he did great. That's KG, though.
He was just himself. I thought he did great, in my opinion.
I thought he did a pretty good job of doing what he do. He was KG.
He was able to be

Speaker 12 And, you know, I thought he did an excellent job.

Speaker 12 I really did.

Speaker 5 Who do you think would have won the title this year if they had actually finished the season? Let's hope they still do, but who would have been your pick?

Speaker 12 The Lakers.

Speaker 12 The Lakers were peaking at the right time. Braun was on his way of challenging Giannis to, in my eyes, to win in the MVP.

Speaker 12 They have the best duo in the league since Kobe and Shaq and Anthony Davis and LeBron James. And most importantly, the role players on that team were starting to be stars in their role.

Speaker 12 Guys like Avery Bradley, JaVille McGee, Caldwell Pope started playing better. Danny Green,

Speaker 12 Kyle Kuzler was finding his niche. And then let's not even talk of the resurrection of the White House, a straight monster.

Speaker 12 And, you know, a lot of people don't give Frank Vogel credit, but Frank Vogel used to have those Indiana Pacers really battling out with the miami heat um and jay kidd over there on the bench phil handy who's one of the who not who is who is the best uh

Speaker 12 player development guy in the nba hands down there's no question about it but i thought lebron james and anthony davis were on the mission they were peaking at the right time they were playing beautiful basketball and adding the morris twin from detroit was huge for them and deion Waiters was huge for them.

Speaker 12 Because one thing about it, you always want to have a deep team. And here's why.
Everyone is not going to have minutes, but

Speaker 12 you want to keep pressure on your role, guys, to perform.

Speaker 12 Like when I was with the Celtics, I knew if I didn't go out there and do what I needed to do and do my job, I always had to look over my shoulder at PJ Brown, Leon Poe, a big baby.

Speaker 12 And you want to keep that pressure because

Speaker 12 it holds guys accountable.

Speaker 5 Yeah, one name you didn't bring up there was your guy, Rayjean Rondo, Trouble in Paradise between you guys?

Speaker 12 No, it's not, no, no, no. We all good.
Rondo is Rondo. You know how playoff Rondo is.
Things that's known don't have to be said.

Speaker 12 See, the thing about the Lakers is, out of everybody that's in the NBA, they have the most experience, playoff experience, championship pedigree.

Speaker 12 When you look at their roster, JaVille McGee, champion, Braun James, champion,

Speaker 12 Quinn Cook, champion, Rondo, champion, champion, Danny Green, champion,

Speaker 12 the White Howard, took a team to the finals. You know, they are really, really experienced, battle-tested, and, you know, that's why I had the Lakers to win the championship this year.

Speaker 5 I saw your comments today. I'm a Bulls fan, and you said that Boylan's got to be next, and I couldn't agree more because I don't think he's...

Speaker 5 you know, was qualified to be a head coach to begin with.

Speaker 5 My question, though, is more about the front office and the perception around the league that players have about the bulls how long will it take for free agents to be like hey this isn't just a completely dysfunctional franchise uh and how long will that like that take hold with guys i know everyone talks in the nba and that's been something that's talked about where guys are like hey the bulls don't know what they're doing why would anyone go there Well, the thing is, is that they could change it.

Speaker 12 It could be overnight if they have the right coach.

Speaker 12 If they have have the right coach, it could be overnight. It could be an instant change.
All of a sudden, you're like, oh,

Speaker 12 they got this coach over here. I want to go play for him.
I like this talent. I like the way that they're running things.
You know, it could be changed overnight.

Speaker 12 Or it could stay the way it is with the wrong hire. So you could keep Jim Balling, or you could hire the wrong coach, and you could still be right here treading water.

Speaker 12 You could, you know,

Speaker 12 get you the right coach in there, change the coach, culture, and you could be

Speaker 12 in the Bahamas snorkeling, looking at colorful fish.

Speaker 5 You know who's available? Mark Jackson. Who is that?

Speaker 5 No, I don't want Mark Jackson. You know, in my mind,

Speaker 12 you know, in my mind, I was thinking Mark Jackson.

Speaker 12 I was thinking Mark Jackson, Sam Cassell.

Speaker 12 I would love to see Sam Cassell get his first shot.

Speaker 12 I was even thinking of Damon Stelemeyer.

Speaker 5 He did a great job in Pacific. Yep.

Speaker 12 Even Tylou.

Speaker 12 And here's the thing. You got to bring.

Speaker 12 It's a different type. It's not like old school no more.
Like, these old school coaches are coming extinct. Like, guys,

Speaker 5 it's a players league.

Speaker 12 You got Adam Silver. He's a players commissioner.
You know, like, think about it. Like, guys, we have a fashion week in the NBA.
Guys are able to wear different fashion.

Speaker 12 God rest his soul. When David Stern was in office we had a rule we had to start wearing suit and ties.
Adam Siller changed all that up. So now as coaches, you have to change also.

Speaker 12 You got to get young blood in there that can relate to guys that, you know, you got to understand that you might walk in at halftime and a guy might be on Twitter,

Speaker 12 Instagram looking at a highlight that they just done. That's just the nature of it.
And you got to be able to understand that.

Speaker 12 So you got to get guys in there that's going to understand the players, that's going to have the players ready to run through a wall for them and buy into their system. So, to me, you got to go young.

Speaker 12 I almost think that Greg Pop time is almost up. You know, he is great of a job as he done.
But, you know, at some point, we all run our course.

Speaker 12 And, you know, maybe it's time for new change over there with the Spurs.

Speaker 5 Yeah. What about Coach Perk? He's interested in getting on that side of the system?

Speaker 12 No, no, no.

Speaker 12 I'm loving this media too much. You know why? Because I could just sit back.
I could watch the games from home or in my hotel room. I'm already a huge fan of basketball.

Speaker 12 And I could just go on television and talk my shit about hoops. I don't have to spend all those long hours, a guy calling me at 11.30, midnight.

Speaker 12 11.30 at night or midnight telling me they want to go to the gym and get extra shots and I got to go. No, no, I ain't doing no.
Right now, I'm really, really cool right where I'm at.

Speaker 5 All right, I want to flash back real quick to 2008 to Wheelchair Gate. Paul Pierce gets injured.

Speaker 5 He gets taken off the court in a wheelchair. Later on, what, 13, 14, 15 years later, he says that the real reason he got wheeled off in that game, I think it was game one, right, of the NBA Finals.

Speaker 5 He says the real reason he got wheeled off was because he shit himself. You were there.
Was there any inclination? Did you know that Paul Pierce had just just doo-dooed in his pants?

Speaker 5 Or did you think he was injured? I knew after the game.

Speaker 12 I didn't know during the time of the injury, but I knew after the game. And by the way, that was a clever-ass trick he pulled.
Like, whoever would have thought of that, right?

Speaker 12 Like, he couldn't just call a timeout and go run off the court. So, like,

Speaker 12 that was a clever idea with Paul. Paul was, but that's just like his game.
Paul, the way he goes about life and the way he thinks is just how he plays.

Speaker 12 He got a lot of deceptive in his game and in life. So you never know what Paul is thinking.
But that was really, really clever. Because I don't know if it would have happened to me.

Speaker 12 I don't know how it would have handled this situation. And I think that was during the time.
And I think that was during the time when we was wearing white tights, too.

Speaker 5 James Harden and white tight. Yeah.
Yeah.

Speaker 5 Yeah.

Speaker 5 You know what we're saying? Yeah.

Speaker 5 All right. I got one last,

Speaker 5 not even a question, but a statement. Perkin.
Perkin, this has been awesome. You are now, by the way, a recurring guest.

Speaker 5 So whenever we want you on the Talk NBA, you're legally obligated to call in, just so you know. So

Speaker 5 no problem. Okay, perfect.
Perfect.

Speaker 5 All right, so I want to clear the air here.

Speaker 5 I have some old tweets about you. I'm going to just read one of them.
On May 7th, 2014, I don't know what, I think that was Clipper's Thunder.

Speaker 5 I tweeted, I'd be as mad as Kendrick Perkins, too, if my hands flat out refused to work. So I don't even know what that was in a relation to.

Speaker 5 I don't know what you did, but it sounds like your hands weren't working that night. So I just want to, I want, now that our relationship has started here, I want to be open with you.

Speaker 5 Wow, that was you. I was number,

Speaker 12 you know what? You know, in my mind, I was like, I wonder if I cost somebody some money for the game. I wonder if somebody

Speaker 12 was betting on the game.

Speaker 5 Yes.

Speaker 5 My apologies. Yes.

Speaker 12 In my defense, you do have to realize, like,

Speaker 12 when I was playing with that young Oklahoma City Thunder team,

Speaker 12 they wasn't passing the ball that often. So

Speaker 12 you didn't never know when you was going to get a pass. It probably wasn't that my hands wasn't working, but I probably was just shocked that the ball actually got passed.

Speaker 5 That's a good point because it, like, I mean,

Speaker 5 obviously, I'm not comparing playing stupid pickup games on Saturday morning in the NBA, but I get passes sometimes and they go right off my hands because I'm like, I never expected anyone to want me to shoot the ball here.

Speaker 5 Oh, right. Whoa, you actually, hold on, you had eight points that game.
So I was, you know what? I was wrong. You had eight points that game.
I'm looking it up right now.

Speaker 5 You had eight points in 25 minutes played and nine rebounds. So hand up, I was wrong.

Speaker 5 It must have been, I must have been on the thunder and at some moment you were like, you pissed me off and I was like, what the fuck's going on?

Speaker 12 It's okay. It's okay.
I mean, it's cool. You know, I understand.

Speaker 12 Especially if you had money on the game, man, you know, and you, and I probably did some dumb shit.

Speaker 12 Look, I'm not, listen, I'm not shying away that I had a couple of bloopers in my career that probably would have pissed a lot of people off. But hopefully, I made you more money than

Speaker 12 I lost,

Speaker 12 you know,

Speaker 12 than you lost, probably.

Speaker 5 Well, no, because I'm a terrible gambler, but you tried. So that's not on you.
Okay, that's on me. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
I'm not putting that one on you at all.

Speaker 12 I appreciate it.

Speaker 5 Yeah.

Speaker 5 All right. Well, Perk, thank you so much.
It's been a lot of fun. We really appreciate it.
And hopefully basketball comes back so that we can have you back on.

Speaker 5 And tweet out some more highlights of Stone when he gets back on the court because I watched that clip and he is an absolute beast.

Speaker 12 Okay, we'll do. We'll do.
He in training right now, but I got you. I'm going to tweet some more.
But I appreciate it, fellas.

Speaker 12 Y'all keep doing y'all thing, man. Really, real talk.
Much respect, much love. I love what y'all doing.
I really appreciate y'all having me on.

Speaker 5 All right. Thanks so much, Perk.
Appreciate it, man.

Speaker 5 Have a good one. You too.
See you, man.

Speaker 5 That interview with Perk was brought to you by our great friends at Meundies. I love my Me Undies.
I'm wearing a pair as we speak. It's the only underwear I wear.
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Speaker 5 Okay, let's get some segments, and we got our Mount Flushmore.

Speaker 5 First segment we have is Bad Sports Town. Wait, what is it? Taiwan? Yeah,

Speaker 5 the island nation of Taiwan. Bad Sports Town.
They got baseball started again in Taiwan. Good Sports Town.
But they've got fans that are all cardboard cutouts. Bad Sports Town.
Bad Sports Town.

Speaker 5 That's actually. They can't leave early.
Yeah, they can. And also don't have to worry about foul balls hitting them.
So you've actually talked me into Taiwan being a good sports town. Yeah.

Speaker 5 I actually think that if we go,

Speaker 5 by all accounts, we're going to go to a system where there won't be fans, I'd be cool with filling the seats with anything and then piping in fake noise. Dogs.
Dogs.

Speaker 5 No, because you need owners for dogs. What if it's just free play dogs, though? Free play dogs would be good.
Maybe you're just stuffed animals. What about this idea?

Speaker 5 You just, you put a tarp down over all the seats, and it's a green screen.

Speaker 5 And so then you can overlay all the best fans from seasons past doing things like catching foul balls, drinking their beer out of the foul ball cup. Yes.
Just an all-star reel of fans.

Speaker 5 They do need to rethink it because it can't just be no fans.

Speaker 5 Only Marlin's Man is allowed to attend games. Did you see Marlin's Man is

Speaker 5 he

Speaker 5 is finally what he had a tweet the other day? He's like, we need to, he's still pushing that 9-11 should be first responders day everywhere.

Speaker 5 Like in the middle of the pandemic, he's not getting off of his... And I actually agree with him.
I don't know if right now is the right time, but I agree with that. There should be a day.

Speaker 5 Yeah, absolutely. I agree with that.
It should be 9-11. No, No, I haven't seen him in a while.
They're telling you to stay away from your parents in times like this.

Speaker 5 All right, let's do our Mount Flushmore.

Speaker 5 PFT, you have the first pick. So it's

Speaker 5 places to be drunk. Okay, Bubba, you okay? You're coughing again.

Speaker 5 Places to be drunk. Mount Flushmore.
Hank, you got a lot of heat. And it's best places to be drunk.

Speaker 5 The Mount Flushmore, best places to be drunk. No, wait, no, no.
No, no, no. We're picking the worst places to be drunk.

Speaker 5 You were mistaken on the last show. You thought that it was the best places.
I was dead on. Shout out to everyone that Flushmore supported me.
It's the Mount Flushmore places to be drunk. Oh, okay.

Speaker 5 The Mount Rushmore places to be drunk would be the best places. Mount Flushmore would be the worst.
Yep. Okay.
My number one,

Speaker 5 work.

Speaker 5 Ooh, work. Okay.
When you accidentally get called in, you don't know that you're going to have to work. You don't, maybe you've had too much to drink the night before and you show up still drunk.

Speaker 5 It can seem fun, maybe at the moment, but the second you have to do real work and you know that you're getting caught, it's just anxiety city. What about a bartender? That

Speaker 5 would be fun. Only time.
Only time. It's okay, but I agree with you there.
All right, my first pick will be behind the wheel of a car. That is definitely the worst place to be drunk.
Okay. Yeah.

Speaker 5 Agreed? You don't want to be behind the wheel of a car when you're drunk. Okay.
We can all agree. Are you guys going to speak out against drunk driving? I've never experienced that.

Speaker 5 I hear that it's funny.

Speaker 5 Are you going to speak out against drunk driving? I too have never experienced it. Okay, all right.
Good. We'll speak out against it.

Speaker 6 My number one, I'll go with, I had in your car on the way to work. I feel like that's too close to what you said.

Speaker 5 I won't say that. I will go with.
Did you prepare for this Mountain Flushmore?

Speaker 6 Church?

Speaker 5 Okay.

Speaker 5 What if you just taken sacrament too many times? Blood of Jesus, it's wine.

Speaker 6 Then you're the biggest lightweight of all time, and you're an embarrassment and therefore. You're a total verge.
You should not be.

Speaker 5 I've never taken sacrament.

Speaker 6 And then my second one, I will go in a long line for the bathroom.

Speaker 5 Oh, good one. Hey,

Speaker 5 you're back, baby. You are back.
I had never left. Okay, well, he had kind of left.

Speaker 5 All right. Have you ever just given up in a line and just said fuck it and pissed yourself?

Speaker 6 No, but I've definitely made some decisions where it's like you wouldn't pee in public in other situations, but you're like, this is coming out.

Speaker 6 I'm just going to do what I can and hope I don't get a public arrest or some shit.

Speaker 5 All right.

Speaker 6 Like, you accept the charge before you pee. You're like, I'm probably, I'm acknowledging the fact that I might get like a public display of drunkenness, but I don't keep it.

Speaker 5 It's worth it. Yeah.
Yeah.

Speaker 5 All right. Mine will be.

Speaker 6 Or just go in the women's bathroom.

Speaker 5 My next one. Oh, I mean, that's a no-brainer.

Speaker 5 Mine will be with your, we'll use it for guys and girls, your significant other's family for the first time. Had that one.
The worst.

Speaker 5 You do not want to be that guy to be drunk with your significant other's parents for the first time.

Speaker 5 You still don't want to be that guy or girl because you will 100%.

Speaker 5 Or it's a bombing experience.

Speaker 6 It's got to happen sometimes.

Speaker 5 Further down the line, I think it's okay. It's actually great further down the line as you come closer.

Speaker 6 Once it's established, there's nowhere to go but up if you fuck up.

Speaker 5 I think you then become the drunk guy forever. Yep.
And you like, it's like

Speaker 5 Ryan Howard starting the fire. Fire guy.
You don't want to be fire guy.

Speaker 5 Okay, my second pick is going to be

Speaker 5 jail.

Speaker 5 Jail would be bad. It's going to be in jail.
Although, Hank, were you... No, you weren't drunk in jail.
No. I've been drunk in jail.
Would you wish you were drunk?

Speaker 6 I have been in drunken jail, though, a different time. Okay.

Speaker 5 I got arrested for time. Which one was better?

Speaker 6 The non-drunk time.

Speaker 5 Okay, so there we go. Being drunk in jail.
Proof sucks.

Speaker 6 I got arrested for internal possession of alcohol. No big deal.

Speaker 5 Nice. Internal possession.
Yeah.

Speaker 6 I was under 21, and I was basically arrested for drinking beer.

Speaker 5 Yeah. There's like one toilet in the middle of the room.
Fuck, so yeah, and if you're drunk, you have to hit that several times. You get confused.

Speaker 5 You wake up a couple times during the night and you forget that you're in jail. That's a bad feeling.
Yeah. Waking up still drunk in prison.
Yes. My next one is going to be

Speaker 5 in class.

Speaker 5 So I think a lot of people out there have done it.

Speaker 5 I know I have, where you show up to class, whether it's like senior year of high school, in college, you've had some day drinking going on, you're in full fucking mode, seems like it'd be fine at the time, might be funny, and then class starts, and you just think everybody here knows that I'm drunk.

Speaker 5 Yes. And then also you have to pee again.
You have to get up several times to go pee, and then everybody does know.

Speaker 5 They always know. Yes.
They always know. Always, always know.
They always, always know.

Speaker 5 All right.

Speaker 5 about uh, in the back seat of a long cab ride?

Speaker 5 Fucking worst when you're just hammered and you're just getting that, like, okay, now I'm starting to get the spins, and I feel like shit, and I just want to get home.

Speaker 5 That sucks, cab ride at the end of the night, oh, and there's probably no trees.

Speaker 5 It always feels longer, but if you're in a yellow cab or an actual taxi cab, it always feels worse than if you're in a Lyft or an Uber, especially like a summer when you're like in a hot back of the hot cab with no AC.

Speaker 6 everything's everything's hard in there sweating drunk is the worst feeling yeah you're bouncing off towers oh all right your last two hank uh in your parents car when you're underage yep so like if you were like drinking and then you're like all right i'm gonna i'm gonna get picked up but like you have to try and pretend like you're not drunk and you're sitting there like the whole time just hoping they don't ask you questions or you're like that's the worst feeling you're like i just got to get home yeah and then maybe i can like get away with this and you never do uh and then my last one i had jail i will go with the gym Ooh.

Speaker 5 Drunk in the gym. Drunk in the gym.

Speaker 6 That's how injuries happen.

Speaker 5 We're having protein, though. That's true.

Speaker 6 Well, that could be one of the side effects that I don't think we've really done.

Speaker 5 There's nothing worse than when you're really drunk and you're like, I'm going to play this sport. I'm going to shoot some hoops.

Speaker 5 And then you're just sweaty, exhausted, and feel like you want to puke after four seconds. And you're terrible at it.
Yeah, you're terrible on the golf course. Golf course is not really a sport.
True.

Speaker 5 Although sports are back. All right, my last one will be an AA meeting.
You don't want to be drunk there. True.
That's a really bad place to be drunk. True.
So, all right, your last one?

Speaker 5 My last one is going to be right before you have sex.

Speaker 5 Is this going to work?

Speaker 5 No, I think so. Sometimes it's like, dude, I'm about to be a stallion.

Speaker 5 Is it going to work? Yeah, I think it's stallion time.

Speaker 6 I mean, you guys are going to mad at me for fried pickles. That's the worst pick I've ever heard.

Speaker 5 What, right before? While you're having sex, great. No, I think right before that moment, you don't have the anxiety.
Yeah, you don't know if it's not going to work yet.

Speaker 5 In that moment, if you're thinking, I'm just going to, like,

Speaker 6 I'm just going to go for it. I think it would be, yeah, you don't have those reservations.

Speaker 5 Yeah, it's true. Sometimes you think.
Good point.

Speaker 6 Bad pick, PFT.

Speaker 5 It's not mine. This is just like what people would say.
Bad pick. Oh, so you're pandering.
No, I'm just saying in general, when you think of bad choices.

Speaker 6 So is it your pick or what you think people would pick?

Speaker 5 I pandered with the last pick.

Speaker 5 All the other ones are my idea.

Speaker 5 I had the only other ones I had were, I mean, with your boss, but that's kind of at work. Can I substitute my last pick? No.
No. Fuck.
It's like chess. Once you take your hand off the move.

Speaker 5 With your boss is bad, but that's kind of at work. And then

Speaker 5 being in a subway system sucks. That's bad.
Drunk. Because you also feels like it takes forever and you can get confused very easily.
You get seasick. Yeah.
Oh, a boat wouldn't be bad. A boat's not.

Speaker 5 Yeah. Although a boat's not being drunk on a boat's floor.

Speaker 5 I had

Speaker 5 my other one here was a big grocery store. Just like wandering around the aisles and not really knowing where you're going.
Yeah. Grocery store.

Speaker 5 Although that can be fun too when you get on this cart and you go a little crazy. Roller coaster.

Speaker 5 Roller coaster sucks to be drunk on.

Speaker 5 On a median in Indianapolis with a bag full of drugs and cash.

Speaker 5 Yeah, who exactly? Oh, those, Jim Merce.

Speaker 5 How about... What do you guys think about

Speaker 5 laying down in bed at night when you're like really drunk and you're like, fuck.

Speaker 5 This is like nothing that I can't do anything. Like it's almost, it's almost like the next moment you're going to have is either going to be puking or waking up violently hungover.
Yeah.

Speaker 5 That's a, that's a, that's a feeling that kind of sucks. Although I think it comes after a lot of shitty things, so it's probably a relief.
What about when the cops come?

Speaker 5 Yeah, although that's a rush of adrenaline, so you kind of get undrunk for a second. You're like, I got this.
Yeah.

Speaker 5 It would actually be when you successfully evade the cops and your adrenaline dies down. That's a shitty drunk.
Because you're like, damn it. Now I'm out of breath and want to puke.
Yep.

Speaker 5 right after a tequila shot it's a bad bad feeling

Speaker 6 when you're really drunk and you take a tequila shot oh yeah yeah that's a bad feeling i used to have a problem for like a few years it doesn't happen anymore although i don't take shots that much anymore but i would when i was really drunk and i would drink tequila it would if i it was like a sign like you're too drunk it would literally come straight out my nose

Speaker 5 but that's a that's a bad place to be drunk when the when when someone orders a round of tequila that's a bad place to be drunk like already really drunk getting off a plane Yeah.

Speaker 5 Being on a plane drunk is sweet. I think there's that element, though, like, you can't get too drunk on a plane because then it really starts to suck.
Like, if you get... Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Speaker 5 I agree with that. Yeah, I agree with that.
Yeah, like a nice light buzz is a great thing to have on a plane. Oh, like really getting drunk.

Speaker 5 Like, if you've had a few in the airport and you have a few on the plane and you have that moment, like, fuck, I'm actually really drunk.

Speaker 5 There's something about being on a plane that makes people more violent and...

Speaker 5 like more uh you caged animal yeah yeah exactly that must be what it is because you always hear these stories of people like just trying to fight stewardesses and flight attendants and stuff.

Speaker 5 And I don't think that those same people would fight a random bouncer in a bar, but for some reason they're on a plane. They want to fight everybody.
You know what's crazy to think about?

Speaker 5 I thought about this earlier today. We are in the midst of the longest stretch we will ever have, probably in our adult lives, that we won't be on a plane.

Speaker 5 Might be true.

Speaker 5 Whoa. Whoa.
Whoa. Whoa.
Yeah, Hank, remember when you couldn't fly? Yeah.

Speaker 5 You florioed it. Yeah.
Florio is loving this time. Total Florio.
That's what they call it for people who are scared of flying. It's a florio.
He pulled a florio, dude. John Madden, too.

Speaker 5 People don't remember this, but John Madden used to have to take an RV across the country to every game he was calling.

Speaker 6 Little Giants taught me that.

Speaker 5 All right. Let's do guys on chicks.
Before we do that, remember, watch the scheme on HBO. We're going to do a review, and we also have Christian Dawkins on the show on Friday.
So watch that.

Speaker 5 We're going to do a review of it. It's an interesting story about the NCAA investigation and basically the 2017 Rick Petino, all that stuff, Arizona.

Speaker 5 So watch that. Hank, guys on chicks, we'll finish off our Wednesday tax day, no tax day show.

Speaker 6 Sup, Mr.351D Duggerton, and Honk. My ex-boyfriend one and a half years and I are both still in our college town during this quarantine.

Speaker 6 We broke up two weeks ago, but are still hanging together as friends with benefits.

Speaker 5 Last night,

Speaker 6 one of his friends found my Tinder and sent it to him. He confronted me and said he doesn't want me to be on Tinder while we're still hooking up.

Speaker 6 I think it shouldn't matter to him, especially since it's not like I can just leave and hook up with any of them. But he wants me to delete it.

Speaker 5 Who's right? I mean, you can just say it's just during the quarantine. Say it's catfish.
Yeah, you can't go try to hook up with somebody right now.

Speaker 5 The thing about quarantine is if you've made contact with somebody at any point in that quarantine, you almost have to hang out only with that person.

Speaker 5 It's like Caleb, our friend Caleb, who's basically being bullied by a bunch of teenagers right now. Yeah, so this guy just kind of entrapped you into a relationship.

Speaker 5 I feel like, yeah, go ahead and set up dates for the second this thing is over.

Speaker 6 All right, well, that leads into our next question. This girl I've always had a thing for recently messaged me, but she currently lives over 300 miles away.

Speaker 6 With quarantine season in full effect, there's no possible way to go and visit her or hang out in person.

Speaker 6 Is it worth texting and FaceTiming constantly, knowing that nothing will come from it for several months, or am I blue balling myself? Thanks, guys.

Speaker 5 Cyber is a long game. Ever heard of cyber sex?

Speaker 5 That too. Yeah.
Cyber.

Speaker 5 What would you do if I I were there right now?

Speaker 5 Especially that winter time. How wet are you? These kind of things.
Girls love that. I'm getting there.
I bet. I picture myself

Speaker 5 switching back and forth between my tongue and my penis in your clip. Just say,

Speaker 5 promise not to share this picture with anybody, and then just wait for her response.

Speaker 6 And this guy's acting like he has something better to do.

Speaker 5 Right. That's true.
Like, what are you going to do, dude? Like, just might as well

Speaker 6 do nothing when this is over.

Speaker 5 This is the perfect time to just put in a shitload of game. And then when you, yeah, when you come out, you're going to be the guy who was simping her all along the way.

Speaker 6 But then you can come out and be like, oh, well, you know, that was quarantine me. Like, this is, I decided to change myself once quarantine was over.
Like, sorry, that was the old me.

Speaker 5 Yeah, quarantine me. There's so many excuses built into this quarantine activity.
I like that. I was just going insane because I hadn't had

Speaker 5 anybody yet.

Speaker 6 I know some guys that allow their ladies to use vibrators.

Speaker 6 That don't allow their ladies to use vibrators. Are they insecure because they don't think they can compete with the vibrator and may not get her off?

Speaker 5 Yes. Yeah, extremely insecure.
Yeah, no, that's listen, you should be happy that there's less work that you have to do. Right.
Have the vibe. The vibrator is like a great closer.

Speaker 5 Call that fucking righty in. Yeah, throwing 102.
You should gassing people. You should carry one with you in your backpack at all times, just in case.

Speaker 5 All you need to worry about is getting a quality start. Six innings, three earned runs.

Speaker 5 Then you go to the bullpen. You sound like somebody who is afraid of a machine taking your job, and you need to learn to embrace the machines.
Yes.

Speaker 6 Sup, Leroy, Coach Dougs, and Private Honk. My boyfriend and I have been distanced for quite some time during quarantine.

Speaker 6 We spent a lot of time together on FaceTime, but most of the calls consist of me watching the screen frustrated while he plays Call of Duty with the boys.

Speaker 6 I finally got fed up with how he ignores me, so while I thought he was listening to the game, I ranted at him and told him how big of a dick he was being and how I was even questioning our relationship.

Speaker 6 Turns out he had one side of his headset off, so he could listen to me and heard every bit of it. What can I do to make up for it? Sounds like you were just saying.

Speaker 5 Yeah, it sounds like you just said what you felt.

Speaker 5 Yeah, you were just sharing your experiences with him and that you're let down by him because he's making you watch a live stream if you him playing Call of Duty.

Speaker 5 I think you accidentally just fell into like a good relationship with open communication. Yeah.

Speaker 5 I accidentally told my boyfriend how I really feel. What should I do? I accidentally expressed what I felt in terms of anger about my boyfriend being.
What's more I need from him in this relationship?

Speaker 5 I really beefed that one up. Why are you even just joining his Twitch stream? Yeah.
Just time to do F in the stream.

Speaker 5 I have been trying to get my girlfriend to be like, hey, Call of Duty, like it's fun.

Speaker 6 Like watch, like, how? And there's just not even the slightest bit of hint of interest, like anything. Like, it's just, if I'm playing Call of Duty, like, I might as well be like in another planet.

Speaker 5 You should just, like, write F on a piece of paper and hold it up to your camera as he's playing Call of Duty. Yes.
Be like, way to fuck that up, dude. Or get really good at it.

Speaker 5 No, that means that you're... Yeah, get really good and beat him at it.
Beat his ass. Guys, you love it.
If Beat him, then it'll stop.

Speaker 6 They love it. All right, last one.

Speaker 6 It's hard for me to imagine that this is true. My fiancé and I had to postpone our wedding because of the Rona.
We moved it to Halloween this year. Have any of you ever been to a Halloween wedding?

Speaker 6 People want to dress up. We're for it, but we got to make sure we have the best costumes at our own wedding.

Speaker 5 Oh, my God. What should we be? Dumb and dumber.

Speaker 5 Always plays. If you're getting married at your own wedding.
I don't. Have you ever been to a Halloween wedding? I have not.
It's a wild.

Speaker 5 It sounds like it might be fun, though.

Speaker 6 It can't be like, is that, there's no way.

Speaker 5 What day of the week is Halloween? Let's figure this out. It's got to be a Saturday this year, right? Or Friday?

Speaker 6 That's, I guess, how we can figure out.

Speaker 5 You should go as

Speaker 5 Joffrey. That's Saturday night.

Speaker 6 Wow.

Speaker 5 It's true. Go as Joffrey and Sansa.
No, go as Killer Dad. No, go as Cersei and what's his name? Jamie.
Jamie, yeah. Brother, sister.
Yeah, just send out some really creepy vibes.

Speaker 5 Is this an Alabama wedding?

Speaker 5 No, you should go as, like, do something really funny. Like, he should go, you should go as, like, the horse, and he goes as the ass.
That's pretty good. Just like gallop in.
Uh-huh.

Speaker 5 Oh, you're fucked, though. Like, this is weird.

Speaker 6 I can't imagine a Halloween like I think.

Speaker 5 Okay, here's what you do.

Speaker 5 I would jokingly suggest that I go as the bride and you go as the groom, and then, haha, won't that be funny? I'm gonna dress again. Um, all right.

Speaker 5 Here's what you actually do: this is actually a practical solution for you.

Speaker 5 You do, like, uh, you tell everyone you're gonna dress up classy, so suits, maybe even black tie, and then do the the masks from eyes wide shut fidelio it's just a big orgy fuck time yeah but that you know like those masks that like you can have everyone do like really cool masks but at least they look

Speaker 5 yeah they look they look normal yeah or you can go you can just have like the tux and the wedding dress you tell everybody in attendance we're not dressed nobody's dressing up for this and then you just have tear away pants and tear away shirts just and boom underneath just dress like a basketball just think about this right now before you let everyone dress up at at your wedding just ask yourself this simple question how many Joe exotics do I want at my wedding because right now you probably got five you probably got five Joe exotics you probably got three Carol Baskins and maybe even throw a Jeff Lowe like you're fucked so that's gonna be the the thing everyone's wearing that's what they should do the Carol Baskin with the guy on the leash oh the simp leash yeah that's pretty good

Speaker 5 and then you have somebody that like built a sea-do around their body and they go as James if you got live tigers this actually would be a pretty sick maybe just do the whole wedding at doc Antle's place.

Speaker 5 And then you can just marry Doc Antle and be one of his like 16 wives. Well, I was going to say, just marry all of his wives.
Yeah. Okay.
Well, we gave you enough solutions. Tell us how it goes.

Speaker 5 Actually, invite us. We won't go.
No, we'll send Bubba. That would be funny.
Go as Bubba. That'd be funny.
Go as Hyman Roth and Donna Grun. Yeah.
Yeah, do that. Do that.
All right.

Speaker 5 We'll see everyone on Friday. Love you guys.
We're talking away.

Speaker 5 anyway

Speaker 5 Today's a model day to find you shy

Speaker 5 Oh I've been coming for your love, okay

Speaker 5 Needless to say

Speaker 5 I've said it was about me somewhere

Speaker 5 Stella

Speaker 5 might be

Speaker 5 Say after me

Speaker 5 to be safe and sorry Say after me

Speaker 5 it's the better to be safe and sorry.

Speaker 5 Clues that you say

Speaker 5 gazing on,

Speaker 5 just a flame that worries away.

Speaker 5 You are things I've got to remember.

Speaker 5 And you're shy and away.

Speaker 5 Well, I'll be coming for you anyway.

Speaker 5 You shine away.

Speaker 5 I'll be coming for you anyway.

Speaker 5 If you pardon my kids, position Box and Ball School Sports.