Baker Mayfield, NBA Trade Deadline, And The XFL

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Speaker 1 On today's part of my take, we have our good friend Baker Mayfield. We do a little PR 101 for what the Browns season was.

Speaker 1 We figure out our strategy going forward. We also have NBA trade deadline, a bunch of moves, maybe the craziest trade deadline ever.
This league. Whoa, Jinx, by May Coke.
We have Fire Fest.

Speaker 1 We have XFL preview. We have FAQs, a packed Friday show for you.

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Speaker 1 Hey,

Speaker 5 let's go.

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Speaker 1 Today is Friday, February 7th, and we have the NBA trade deadline.

Speaker 3 Huge news. Massive breaking news.
Miami heat

Speaker 3 getting stronger.

Speaker 1 Andre Gudala, the finesse king of the world, somehow sat out for half the year and is now getting paid more. You got two years, 30 million at age 36.

Speaker 5 And to live in Miami.

Speaker 1 And to live in Miami. That is...
CJ McCollum, recurring guest, actually said it perfectly. He was like,

Speaker 1 my guy got to promote his book, spend time with his family, get his mind right, and then gets to move to Miami and gets a shitload of money.

Speaker 3 Well, what's great is he was in Memphis, right? So he was getting paid under the Tennessee tax, which is no state income tax. Right.
Now he's going to Florida, also no state income tax. Correct.

Speaker 3 And my Miami Heat are improving.

Speaker 1 Global warming. Are you not worried?

Speaker 1 Are you not worried about losing Justice Winslow?

Speaker 3 Not worried about that at all.

Speaker 1 He was never one of your favorites.

Speaker 3 No, no. Listen, Justice Winslow, he's a carpetbagger, right? He was there.
He never felt like he was part of that core group like Jay Butt. So I'm feeling good about moving forward.

Speaker 3 But I actually do think that the Clippers got a lot better. Oh, yeah.
And I hope that they keep Isaiah Thomas. I'm hearing that they might just let him go, which is a very NBA thing.

Speaker 3 It's to just get somebody to be like, actually, no. No, yeah.

Speaker 1 So the Clippers got Marcus Morris, which is going to be awesome when they go up against LeBron.

Speaker 1 I feel like he's one of those guys in the league who, there's no LeBron stopper, but he's one of the guys who can make him a new one. He wants to He wants it.
He wants to welcomes a challenge.

Speaker 1 He wants to annoy LeBron to no end, and he's got that toughness to him that, oh, man.

Speaker 3 He's like what Deshaun Stevenson wishes he was.

Speaker 1 I'm excited. I'm excited.
I actually am excited to see if the Clippers and Lakers played in the Western Conference Finals. That would be actually awesome.

Speaker 3 Well, so I like Morris out there. I like keeping Isaiah because he is also a LeBron stopper in a much different way.

Speaker 3 So Morris is a guy that can bully LeBron, and Isaiah Thomas is a guy that LeBron sucks at bullying, but he still loves to bully him.

Speaker 3 So, like, LeBron's brain will be trapped in a tornado of just like, who do I go after? Who's annoying me more at this time?

Speaker 3 And I feel like that's a good asset to have on your team if you need to get inside his head in the Western Conference Finals.

Speaker 1 The other big trade was the Timberwolves traded for D'Angelo Russell. They traded away Andrew Wiggins, who, how old do you think Andrew Wiggins is?

Speaker 3 Andrew Wiggins, he's not that old, right? He's like 28, 27? He's 24.

Speaker 1 Oh, shit. Yes.
When I saw that, I was like, what? He's going to be 25 in a few weeks, but still, he's the classic guy where you could just...

Speaker 1 Andrew Wiggins, I feel like, might be a new age Jeff Green where he will get traded now. This will start like the process of him being traded a million different ways.

Speaker 1 He's better than that, but a million different teams. And everyone will keep saying, well, he's only 26.
Well, he's only 27. Yeah.

Speaker 3 He's got all the upside.

Speaker 1 But more importantly, this was a classic classic NBA trade where the Timberwolves were like, we have a franchise guy, Carl Anthony Towns, who is very, very unhappy.

Speaker 1 I think the Timberwolves have lost 13 in a row. So let's just trade for his best friend.
And that's what they did. D'Andrew Russo is his best friend.
They traded for him.

Speaker 1 They now are thinking, everyone's talking about how Devin Booker, who is like, it's this new age big three best friend group that wants to all be together. So Suns fans are freaking out.

Speaker 1 I put the Monopoly pieces together. Jalil Okofour is now the most important

Speaker 1 trade chip in the NBA because if the Pelicans trade him to the Grizzlies, the Grizzlies now have the 2015 Duke Blue Devils who won a national championship that was completely erroneous.

Speaker 3 Plus, they have Deion Waders now, too.

Speaker 1 Well, so they would have Justice Winslow, Tyus Jones, Grayson Allen, and Jalil Okofour, or...

Speaker 1 The Timberwolves could trade for Jalil Okofour, and they would then have the first three picks in the 2015 NBA draft, which I don't think has ever happened.

Speaker 1 And even if they stink, you could say, well, we had pick one, two, and three. How are we bad? Yeah.

Speaker 3 I mean, that would be a Darren Revelle perfect wet dream right there to have those three guys on the same team. I hope that he goes to Memphis.
That'd be great. That'd be even better.

Speaker 3 Because I always say, like,

Speaker 3 if you look at a lot of the great college basketball teams, like, you have that debate, could they beat the shittiest NBA team? You're like, let them get a little bit older and see.

Speaker 3 And now we would actually get to see.

Speaker 1 And add John Morant.

Speaker 3 And add John Morant, who's fucking awesome.

Speaker 3 With the Carl Anthony Towns and

Speaker 3 Wiggins thing. Sorry, I'm sick right now.
Our whole podcast is dealing with. We're fighting.

Speaker 1 I'm trying not to get sick.

Speaker 3 I think coronavirus right now.

Speaker 3 But Wiggins is a guy that I will always think that he could be good on whatever the next team that he's on. Yeah.
He's like Trent Richardson.

Speaker 1 Dude, he's 24.

Speaker 3 He's young. Think about it.
He was awesome in college. He's 24.
I just keep waiting for him to get in the right system. You can take screenshots of him.
Absolutely.

Speaker 3 He's fucking everything up on the court. Just got to get in the right system.
Right system. That's all Wiggins needs.

Speaker 1 He's 24. Just keep saying that.
He's 24. He's the Mbappe of basketball right now.
He's 24. It's so, so, so young.

Speaker 3 Can I put one in Twitter's earhole real quick? Sure. Because Woge bombs, Woge was dominating this trade deadline.
Shams got put off to the side a little bit, I feel like.

Speaker 3 I hate it when Twitter does the unchronological thing during times like this and a Woge bomb that's like five minutes old pops up. And I get mad at Twitter.

Speaker 3 I'm like, fuck you, I already read this four minutes ago. This is old news.

Speaker 1 Right, right. No, it definitely fucks you up whenever you pop on there.
You're like, what's going on here? This is.

Speaker 1 Why do they do that? Twitter just. They just get bored and they just try to figure out ways to

Speaker 1 keep themselves unbored by making things shitty and then trying to fix the shitty things.

Speaker 3 Yeah, that's inside Jack from Twitter's own brain, right?

Speaker 3 During elections, it's actually awesome because they'll like old tweets that will predict a state going one way will pop up and it'll be completely wrong like 12 hours later. Right.

Speaker 1 So what other news do we have? We have Ben Simmons and Joel MB officially do hate each other.

Speaker 1 So there was a report that off the court they do hate each other, which I think we kind of all assumed when he called. Ben Simmons said the team is soft.
I don't know what the Sixers are going to do.

Speaker 1 That seems

Speaker 5 Al Horford, locker room cancer.

Speaker 1 This now feels like the process, they got to start it all over again. Trade them both and get a bunch of picks.

Speaker 3 Get all of them out of there?

Speaker 1 Could be Al, though.

Speaker 5 I mean, he was a part of the Celtics last year. They were a locker room disaster.
True.

Speaker 1 People think it was Kyrie. They're a locker room disaster.
What's a common denominator? He would be the most, yeah,

Speaker 1 the last one you would

Speaker 1 suspect to be a locker room cancer, Al Horford.

Speaker 3 Or you could also say that it's like teams the year after Jay Butt leaves. Yeah, that's who they implode because they miss him so very deeply.

Speaker 1 Maybe, although the Timberwolves kind of imploded with Jay Butt a little bit.

Speaker 3 And but more the year after.

Speaker 1 And the Bulls are always imploding.

Speaker 3 But more the year after.

Speaker 1 Seeing red,

Speaker 1 everyone just hates being in Chicago.

Speaker 5 It's the worst.

Speaker 1 Lori wants not to be there anymore. Zach Levine doesn't want to be there.
Jim Boylan is a meat. Shout out Ricky O'Donnell, who had the great phrase, Jim Boylan is a meat shield for John Paxson.

Speaker 1 That's all he is as a coach. Because

Speaker 1 he's literally just a meat shield. He stands in front of the front office so everyone can say, look at that idiot.
And not say, look at those idiots sitting up there.

Speaker 5 At least Bulls fans can hold on to those Anthony Davis comments until the summer.

Speaker 1 True. True.
Absolutely. Blow the whole thing up.

Speaker 3 Your best hope is that every team, every good player that comes into town during All-Star weekend just gets shitty and implodes by being in Chicago.

Speaker 1 Yeah, there we go. Maybe it's just a joke.

Speaker 1 But either way, then we had Andre Drummond to the Cavs, which poor Tristan Thompson and Kevin love, they were like, we really want to be traded from the Cavs.

Speaker 1 And then the Cavs did the opposite and traded for Drummond. And we're like,

Speaker 1 we're going to go for this. Big question.
Are the Cavs? We're going to go for that 8 seed, baby.

Speaker 3 Are the Cavs all in?

Speaker 3 Is this the window for the Cleveland Cavaliers?

Speaker 1 There's nothing better than the team that's just like, we're all in for the eighth seed.

Speaker 1 I mean, the T-Wolves are probably going to be better than an eighth seed now, but because they've lost so much, they're going to be going all in for an eighth seed.

Speaker 3 I mean, it would be great if the Cavs made it to the playoffs and won a couple series, just like out of sheer dumb luck, because then you could get the...

Speaker 3 It's the theory that we came up with for when Bryce Harper left at Ashles, a team that gets better after their star player leaves and goes elsewhere that we invented.

Speaker 1 Totally invented.

Speaker 3 We could get that going in Cleveland right now.

Speaker 1 Hank, did the Celtics do anything?

Speaker 3 No. Nothing.

Speaker 6 How do you feel about that?

Speaker 1 I feel all right. Okay.
I don't.

Speaker 1 And there's the Celtics talk from Hank. He feels all right.
He doesn't hate it. They stayed put.
No, no, he didn't. No, he did not say he doesn't hate it.
I didn't want them to trade.

Speaker 1 He feels all right.

Speaker 5 I didn't want them to trade Smart or Hayward, so

Speaker 5 I'm happy that they didn't.

Speaker 1 He feels all right. Yeah, I feel all right.
What do you want?

Speaker 1 You want action.

Speaker 5 You want action on the deadline day. Like, you want to go to Woge and see that your team did something, but you run the risk of it being like, what the fuck? What did you guys do? Right.

Speaker 5 So it's all right.

Speaker 3 Yeah, it's all right. I think Woge is the worst thing to happen to NBA front offices.
Why? Because if he's not tweeting about your team, all your fans are like, what the fuck? We're not trying to win.

Speaker 3 That's like the barometer.

Speaker 5 This league, Andre Drummond.

Speaker 1 Or you're like the Bulls and you're like,

Speaker 1 Zach Levine is so important to this franchise. We can't trade him for anything.

Speaker 3 The last time Woge tweeted about the Bulls, I mean, 90% of his tweets about Chicago are like weird contract delineations that are unconscious.

Speaker 5 This league, Andre Drummond just tweeted, if there's one thing I learned about the NBA, there's no friends or loyalty.

Speaker 3 Wow.

Speaker 5 I'm giving my heart and soul to the Pistons, and to have this happen with no heads up makes me realize even more that this is just a business.

Speaker 1 He gave his heart and soul to the Pistons, and when he says that, he means he gave 20 and 10 in a losing effort.

Speaker 1 I mean, what is he? Does Andre Drummond think that he's

Speaker 1 a top 10 player in the league?

Speaker 5 The Drummond jump man song that they made for him when he was trying to get into all-star. Drummond, Drummond, Drummond.
Yeah, that was sick.

Speaker 1 Free Blake now, by the way. We're in full free Blake mode because clearly the Postman.

Speaker 5 Get him to Boston.

Speaker 1 Get him out anywhere.

Speaker 3 Get him back to LA. Is he officially out for the entire year?

Speaker 1 Yeah, he's been out. Yeah, he's been out for the entire year.

Speaker 3 But I'm saying, like, is he officially out, like, even for the entire run of the playoffs? Yeah, his recovery?

Speaker 1 Yeah, I don't think they're going to make the playoffs, but yeah.

Speaker 3 No, I know. I know Detroit's not.

Speaker 1 I'm hypothesizing. Oh, he's someone else.
Yeah, no. I think he's out there.

Speaker 3 Because sometimes when you get out of Detroit, you feel a lot better, hypothetically.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I mean, how about Drummond going from Detroit to Cleveland? Yeah. That's a nice

Speaker 1 lateral move. Big upgrade.
Lateral move.

Speaker 3 No, that's a little farther south.

Speaker 1 Lateral move.

Speaker 3 You got a casino still? Yeah. There's a really nice B-dubs there.

Speaker 1 Both Detroit and Cleveland. I could sit here and be like, I could sell myself on either.
I'd be like, you know what? They're kind of on the up and up.

Speaker 3 Is there a city in America that you would not live in for $25 million a year?

Speaker 3 New York. New York City.
Yeah, probably. The only one city.
That's honestly the only one.

Speaker 1 Oxford, Mississippi.

Speaker 3 Oh, yeah. I would absolutely live in Oxford for $25 million.

Speaker 1 Well, I'd live anywhere for $25 million.

Speaker 5 You'd be a king.

Speaker 5 The hometown of the coronavirus?

Speaker 1 What's it called? Yuhan?

Speaker 3 Yeah. That's not the United States, but.

Speaker 1 Well, yeah, but any you said city, right? I don't know if I live in Alaska.

Speaker 3 That would be tough. Ooh, Juno.

Speaker 5 Depends if it's a summer or winter.

Speaker 3 The thing about Alaska is it's filled with people that are getting away from their problems.

Speaker 3 It's filled with people who are laying low. So you never know really who to trust.

Speaker 1 Right, right.

Speaker 1 All right, so that is this league. Any other trade deadline situations that we need to discuss? I don't know.

Speaker 1 I'm in full college basketball mode, I got to admit. Like, I've been just watching non-stop college basketball, but NBA is about to start picking up.

Speaker 1 Right as the all-star game comes, it feels like, okay, now we're going. Yeah.
Football's over. We're ready to go.
We're ready to get into it.

Speaker 1 Before we do Baker Mayfield, let's do our Fire Fest on this side, and then we'll do segments on the other side of Baker Mayfield. Hank, your Fire Fest.

Speaker 5 My Fire Fest, I have a couple. First one was our actual.
We hosted a Fire Fest last Friday. Yep.
Careful. Our rough and rowdy.
No, it was a great time.

Speaker 1 It wasn't our festival. Oh, it was free.
No one had to pay. That's true.

Speaker 3 What was Ja Rule's slogan? It was like, it's not fraud. It was just

Speaker 3 like we just intentionally misled. Yeah, right.
We actually didn't do any of that. The weather was fucked up.

Speaker 1 No, the weather fucked up.

Speaker 5 It was Firefest because of the weather, but there was like a tornado, hurricane combination explosion at our venue, and so Fire Marshal came, shut it down.

Speaker 5 Everyone had to try and leave during a hurricane. So it was like, no one could stay at the venue.
It was pouring rain and like tornadoing outside. Everyone had to try and leave.

Speaker 5 So that was a fire fest in and of itself, just trying to get an Uber and get home. My other one is that I hurt my back bench pressing.
Yes. But not even actually bench pressing.

Speaker 5 That's what I've been telling people.

Speaker 1 I really hurt it playing ping pong.

Speaker 5 Yes. Which is so much worse to tell someone.

Speaker 1 What about Mookie?

Speaker 5 Mookie, that's my brother's firefest. He lives in San Diego, and so he was like.

Speaker 1 We predicted this.

Speaker 5 He's more upset.

Speaker 5 He told me that he's more upset that now he's going to have to explain to people for years and years and years that he's not a dodgers fan he named his dog mookie when he was on the right socks which is actually doubly bad because it's a puppy right so if mookie signs an extension that puppy everyone will look and be like oh your puppy's only a year like your dog's only a year old you must have named him mookie the minute they traded for him and if he signs a long extension a lot of dogs in the la area will oh yeah mookie is a great dog name

Speaker 3 great great dog what kind of dog is it's a lab right yeah it's like a lab mud so just tell him to change the name to Snoopy.

Speaker 3 It's the same consonants. The dog won't know.

Speaker 5 I sent him that suggestion. He said, I don't think he could pull off Snoopy.

Speaker 1 Oh, wow.

Speaker 3 Doesn't have a lot of faith in his own dog, huh?

Speaker 1 Why change his name to Brady? He'll never leave.

Speaker 5 Not a bad idea.

Speaker 1 Or we'll go to L.A.

Speaker 5 Honestly, don't do that.

Speaker 1 Don't do that.

Speaker 1 Did you have any thoughts on the Mookie Bets trade? I mean, it's.

Speaker 5 It makes no sense to me, honestly. Like, the Red Sox seems like what they did, what they got for it, is, at best a Mookie Bets.
It's kind of like the Raiders trade when they trade to Khalil Mack.

Speaker 5 They're trading assets that they hope will eventually turn into a player the caliber of Mookie Betts.

Speaker 1 Right, eventually

Speaker 3 if they're extremely lucky, it will be Mookie Bets. Or they'll trade guys that probably can't even bowl.

Speaker 1 Yeah, or they'll try to sign someone when it's all, when they rebuild, they'll sign someone like Mookie Betts.

Speaker 5 But no one is as good as Mookie Betts except for Trout. So it's like, what are you doing?

Speaker 3 Has the core of a team ever imploded as quickly as those boss arrests yeah the marlins yeah but that was the intention that was that was more of a fire literally just went for it and just fuck it we're done

Speaker 1 and now the dodgers i mean how many all-ins can the dodgers the dodgers are gonna break the record for the most all-ins this decade this is like they're all in six all

Speaker 1 you gotta win one dodger you know what this is so pathetic

Speaker 1 you know who this sucks for they got they got cheated of course but i'm just saying they every year they're like dodgers are all in look dodgers make a big trade dodger all in you know who this sucks for right What?

Speaker 1 Clayton.

Speaker 3 This sucks for Clayton Kershaw.

Speaker 1 No, actually, it's great for him.

Speaker 3 No, because now it's like, if he chokes again,

Speaker 3 this is the cherry on top.

Speaker 1 They literally traded for a bigger choker in David Price. He's got a ring.
But he's got a ring. He got over that hill.

Speaker 1 But Clayton can, I mean, the chances are David Price will probably choke before Clayton.

Speaker 3 They're going to be choking each other. It's going to be some real kinky shit.

Speaker 1 So that was your Mookie Bets. Okay.
PFT, your Fire Fest.

Speaker 3 My Fire Fest of the week is that

Speaker 3 the MLS had a bunch of celebrities announcing their new jerseys, the New Look jerseys. And you know who they got to do? The Dallas team? Who? Dude Perfect.

Speaker 3 But wait.

Speaker 3 They were missing one of them.

Speaker 3 They were missing Cody. Oh, no.

Speaker 3 Trouble in Paris.

Speaker 3 I don't know. Trouble in Paradise.

Speaker 1 That's not a Fire Fest. That's not hidden for us.

Speaker 3 No, I don't want to see those guys break up anymore. What? What? Because we've established ourselves as the...

Speaker 1 What's wrong with you?

Speaker 1 You get verified and now you're rooting for Dude Perfect? No, trust me.

Speaker 3 Trust me, I don't like Dude Perfect, but I want them to be broken up at our doing.

Speaker 1 Well, it is our doing.

Speaker 3 We can take credit for it?

Speaker 1 Yeah, we took care of it.

Speaker 1 We were the first to talk about it.

Speaker 3 Okay, Cody wasn't there because he's pissed off at the twins and the guy with the beard for getting too much camera time.

Speaker 1 Listen, in 50 years, when one of them passes away and I'm saying, live a long life, I'm not saying anything else, not saying anything else.

Speaker 3 I'll take credit. When they die? Yeah.

Speaker 3 You will have murdered them?

Speaker 1 No. It was so funny.
In 50 years, I I said, that's a long life.

Speaker 3 It was so funny.

Speaker 1 It was a full life. Grandkids, everything.

Speaker 3 It was so funny to watch them do the little catwalk with the uniforms on because the guy with the beard is clearly their leader.

Speaker 1 Always. And they don't.

Speaker 3 He's a jerk. That's a group that doesn't really need a leader whatsoever.
No.

Speaker 3 And they get to the end of the catwalk and they do this little turn, this little cross-legged turn, and the beard guy goes, one, two, three. And like directs everybody to do that.

Speaker 3 So he even takes control on the runway. I'm so happy I didn't see that.
Yeah, you should check it out. It's also a pretty sweet video.

Speaker 3 So thoughts and prayers. I'll change that.
Thoughts and prayers to dude perfect.

Speaker 1 All right, my Firefest, I got two. One is Stephen A.
Smith is trying to get Patrick Mahomes to play in the celebrity All-Star game,

Speaker 1 NBA All-Star weekend in Chicago. So he'll probably win the MVP, and everyone will make a joke about that.

Speaker 5 I don't think so, though, because there was that video of him playing after the season last year, and then it was like they had to shut. I think the Chiefs said, you're not allowed to play.

Speaker 1 But if Patrick Mahomes plays in a celebrity all-star game in Chicago, he will win MVP, and everyone will make a joke.

Speaker 1 But

Speaker 3 if he tweaked his hamstring or something like that,

Speaker 3 then he won the draft.

Speaker 3 Did you see him chugging beers? He was having a good time.

Speaker 1 He looked awesome. I mean, he looked genuinely like he was having the best time of his life.

Speaker 1 And I know that sounds like no duh, everyone would, but you can tell like some people are there and they're like, I just want to get to the club.

Speaker 1 And then some people are there, like, I actually want to enjoy this with the fans.

Speaker 3 Oh, he was soaking it in. That's actually the reason I think that Aaron Rodgers doesn't want to win a Super Bowl is because he'd have to chug beer in front of people

Speaker 3 in front of large crowds. That's not his thing.
And smile. So you got any scotch?

Speaker 1 My other Firefest is everyone's sick and I'm yet to be sick, but I'm basically... I actually think trying to not get sick is worse than being sick because it's the inevitable doom.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 I've just been taking NyQuil and I'm not sick. But I'm like, I have to do something and I know.

Speaker 1 However the timeline works, I'll get sick at the end and everyone will be healthy.

Speaker 3 And we'll be mad at you.

Speaker 1 Yeah, you'd be like, what the hell do you want? Why are you sick? Like, we've been good for a week.

Speaker 3 So, I'm the good news is I'm already starting to feel better. Okay, good.
So, I sound awful, but I'm starting to feel a little bit better. I started to get sick yesterday, went home,

Speaker 1 just puked blood on himself.

Speaker 3 Slept for like 14 hours.

Speaker 1 I'm fine. I'm totally fine.

Speaker 3 Here's the good news about this, whatever I'm dealing with. It stayed above the equator, if you know what I'm saying.

Speaker 1 Because Bubba said that he, Bubba's not here.

Speaker 3 I've got zero butt issues.

Speaker 1 Bubba said he's got some all types of issues.

Speaker 3 In fact, I would say that my butt is in in better shape than it usually is.

Speaker 1 Like after a nice big cheese tray?

Speaker 3 Yeah, it's like after, yeah, like a cheese tray washed down with like apple juice and prunes.

Speaker 1 You're good to go. All right, we got Baker Mayfield on the show.

Speaker 1 We figure out where we're going to go with the Baker Mayfield fan club. So before we do that.

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Speaker 1 Okay, here he is, Baker Mayfield.

Speaker 1 Okay, we now welcome on a good friend of ours, three recurring guests.

Speaker 1 You have three-time recurring guests. It is Baker Mayfield, starting quarterback, Cleveland Browns.
This is a very important podcast. Really? Yes.
More important than the others?

Speaker 1 Well, we need some direction, okay?

Speaker 1 I would say this year probably didn't go great overall. Yeah.
A lot of haters have come out of the woodwork.

Speaker 1 Where do we go? Should we fight back?

Speaker 1 do we need to keep saying hey we're going to make a list colin coward you're on the list all this stuff or should we fall back for a minute wait for next year to start and then pounce um

Speaker 6 i think you continue what we talked about you fight back okay i can't you know right now yep i'm gonna let it die down a little bit I'm gonna let you guys be on the front line for me. Okay.
And then

Speaker 6 as soon as the season starts, I'll be back.

Speaker 3 So when I told Colin Coward that he can suck my dick from the back,

Speaker 3 you were okay with that for me to say it. Well,

Speaker 3 do you want me to be that aggressive? Because I can even go one step further, right?

Speaker 1 Right.

Speaker 1 But if I go one step further, like from the front, choke on my ball

Speaker 1 from the back, from underneath. Listen,

Speaker 1 you don't have to reply to that because we'll just wink. You know, we got it.

Speaker 3 Yeah, I get it. Yeah, yeah, right, right.

Speaker 1 So, in all seriousness, obviously, this year didn't go very well.

Speaker 1 Overall, we were with you training camp.

Speaker 1 The year finishes. Are you like right back in the gym, right back in the let's get this figured out? Or did you take a little time to chill out and be like, all right, that sucked?

Speaker 6 I've taken a little time away.

Speaker 6 Definitely kind of got my mind back together a little bit. Got the body feeling as good as it probably could right now.
And then now I'm about to hit it running.

Speaker 3 Okay. Okay.
Yeah, I noticed that you did take some time off because I saw a picture of you.

Speaker 3 It was you, Alec Ogletree, Saquon. I forget who else.
I actually have the picture right here

Speaker 3 because it's such a good one. It's your screensaver.
It's such a good one. Yeah.

Speaker 3 And it's you guys in the Bahamas together. Now, in this picture, everyone is in great shape, and then there's you in the Bahamas.

Speaker 1 Is that the shape I'm in right there?

Speaker 6 Look at it.

Speaker 1 You're in creation shape. Yeah, that is.

Speaker 3 That is dad-bod shape.

Speaker 1 It's just like you would think that.

Speaker 6 It's bloating from travel.

Speaker 1 When you go on an airplane, it actually is true. Yes.
Your body bloats a little bit. No, we went.

Speaker 1 That was the first day, okay that was right off the airplane it is a laugh out loud picture because these guys have like nine packs that look like shit no you don't need to look good that's not how that's not you know what those are popcorn muscles that's right that's what you're from them workout heroes yeah we're about results exactly right and i think some of them have results but yeah whatever yeah yeah exactly right yeah whatever forget that i like it you're hitting the reset button taking some time off getting mentally refreshed at the end of the season i gotta imagine like it was a tough year.

Speaker 3 You know, like, you probably, you know, didn't really enjoy the last couple months of the season as much as possible.

Speaker 6 No, absolutely not. Yeah, that was the first time I'd say I really wasn't having fun playing football.
Right. And so for me, it's getting back to square one of...
I love the game of football.

Speaker 6 I'm going to make it fun, and that's how I play my best.

Speaker 6 So with an edge, but having a clear head at the same time.

Speaker 1 And when you hit the reset button, I mean, credit to you, it's not like you're out and about. Like I saw the Conor McGregor fight, like Miles Garrett was there and you didn't go.
Yeah, that was great.

Speaker 1 So I thought that showed a lot of maturity. No, they showed a lot of people there.

Speaker 6 It looked like it would have been fun. Right.

Speaker 1 It was first pick overall. Miles Garrett was there.
Yeah. And there was a guy next to him with a weird hat.
But yeah, that was all. Carter was behind.

Speaker 1 Miles, yeah.

Speaker 1 Did you get your phone get blown up when that happened? Yeah. That was,

Speaker 1 I mean, John Annix, a friend of ours. Such a nice guy.
Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 3 And then did Nick Carter ask you to take your hat off because it was blocking the view?

Speaker 6 No. Okay, yeah.

Speaker 3 He's probably intimidated. He appreciated it.
Yeah, it was a good hat. It was almost like a Charlie Whitehurst type of thing.
But it wasn't big enough. That's the problem.

Speaker 3 That's why you didn't get noticed on the camera.

Speaker 6 It wasn't big enough.

Speaker 3 No, it should have been like the Pharrell hat that he wore to the Grammys or whatever.

Speaker 6 Really, I mean, really, that's why I wore it. Just trying to get noticed, you know, just trying to make that step back into reality of what I want.

Speaker 1 Well, and you did a good move by being with Miles Garrett and being like, hey, we still got each other's back.

Speaker 1 Because I know that you got unnecessary shit for after that whole incident, you did the interview right after. I thought everything you said was completely correct.

Speaker 1 It was like, that was a crazy thing. Can't have it.
When you get back in the locker room, it was like Miles Garrett just sitting there like, whoops.

Speaker 6 Yeah, kind of. I mean, he was.

Speaker 1 My bad. I mean, he's quiet regardless.

Speaker 6 Like, he's always sticks to himself. And so to see him and, you know, he can't really express, you know, his sorrow for that, but you could tell.
Right.

Speaker 6 And so it was just about the whole locker room was kind of in a frenzy at that point.

Speaker 6 And so, I mean, regardless, regardless, I had Miles back no matter what, but in the game of football, everybody knows that can't happen.

Speaker 6 And he knows that, and that's why he addressed it, and he's moved on. And so I've talked to him since, and he's in a good place right now.
So he's ready to come back.

Speaker 1 It was crazy that you got any hate for that. I think that was just the blinded Baker Mayfield hit.
Because you basically were like, yeah, you can't hit the opponent in the head with your helmet.

Speaker 1 Like, it was like, Baker's stuff is back. I guess it isn't in the rule book that you can't do that.

Speaker 1 It might be. They might not have the foresight to do that.
Yeah, it's bylaw there.

Speaker 3 It's bylaw, don't take your helmet off, or don't take your opponent's helmet off and hit him. I think if it's your own helmet, it's better.

Speaker 3 The fact that it was his helmet was almost like it made it a little bit more disrespectful.

Speaker 1 Right. Credit to you for not going on the field.
You wouldn't have been suspended in the NBA. Uh-huh.

Speaker 3 That was smart. How close was it on the sideline? Because when all that goes down, it's like it's a full-on brawl at that point.

Speaker 3 Are there people that are trying to run on the field? Like, how close did that become to being like a family?

Speaker 6 There were people trying to run on the field because it was also like less than 10 seconds left in the game right so the clock i think was almost done and i think they let it run but the it should have been because i think it was fourth down yes it was we were supposed to go out there and take a knee right after but they were like screw that everybody off the field right and we we were about to record and the only reason we didn't start recording was that I'm a degenerate loser and I was like, I have the second half line, so we got to see how this ends.

Speaker 1 And then it happened, and we're like, well, good thing we didn't record because that changes everything.

Speaker 1 A little bit. It was a wild moment.
A wild, wild moment.

Speaker 3 Got a question about Odell for you. Has he ever handed out cash in the locker room after you guys have a big win?

Speaker 6 We had a guy named Damon Sheehi Giuseppe. In the preseason, he was kind of a hero.
Yeah. Guy that slept outside the gym.
The kick returner.

Speaker 1 Yes. Yeah.

Speaker 6 So he returned a kick, and he got a nice two grand in his pocket, right?

Speaker 1 I love it.

Speaker 3 I love that Odell does that that's such a great move what a guy that is such a great move when you saw him doing that were you like oh no oh no odell

Speaker 3 uh which one after the lsu game um

Speaker 3 it was to you know the seniors it was legal so it's fine correct all above board and we don't know if it was fake or not yet right

Speaker 1 yeah

Speaker 6 he is known to carry on monopoly money yes

Speaker 1 right

Speaker 1 we got in the headlines with odell because we interviewed joe the day after like at 7 a.m and might have muddied the water So that was our fault. That was our fault big time.

Speaker 1 All right, so

Speaker 1 this is a weird question, but I've always wondered this. So January comes along.
It's playoff football.

Speaker 1 Was there ever a moment where you contacted your PR people or your agent and like, hey, can we stop running the progressive ads? No, never. Okay, there you go.

Speaker 1 Because that was like the AFC playoffs, and it's like Baker's still living in the stadium. And then it's like, you know, it's the AFC championship game.
Oh, Baker's still living there.

Speaker 1 Still living there. Okay.

Speaker 1 Still live there. Yeah.
Yeah.

Speaker 3 No regrets about the commercials at all. I feel like there should be commercial insurance, though.
Right. You know, you should be able to say, let's delay this.

Speaker 3 If you're in the news for not so great reason or the season's going tough, you should be able to say, hey, can we only play these commercials after wins?

Speaker 1 No.

Speaker 6 We would have played more if we would have won.

Speaker 1 There's more.

Speaker 6 Yeah, absolutely. Oh, there's more.

Speaker 1 We're just keeping them in the pocket. Oh, there's deleted ones.

Speaker 6 Always keep one in the holster.

Speaker 1 I like that.

Speaker 3 So now that Swagger Jr. is the new dog, who I think is undefeated at home, you've got some more ads ready to go for riding that good luck wave.

Speaker 6 Yeah, we're coming out fully loaded. Yes.

Speaker 3 Leaded role. Do you notice a difference between Swagger Jr.
and Swagger Sr.?

Speaker 6 Just a little more pep in his step.

Speaker 1 You know, but that comes with age, younger age. Yeah.
Right. He's of the new age.

Speaker 5 Right.

Speaker 6 It's the new Browns.

Speaker 1 It's the new Browns.

Speaker 6 Swagger Jr. is the representative.

Speaker 1 I like that. And the reset button.
Have you been able to talk to Kevin Stavansky? I have.

Speaker 6 A few times. Haven't met him in person yet, but he's been pretty busy putting together the staff, so excited where it's headed.

Speaker 3 General impression of him. I think he's too attractive to be a good head coach.
But he's got that jawline.

Speaker 1 I don't know. What do you think?

Speaker 6 I don't think the jawline has anything to do with it.

Speaker 6 He's very well put together.

Speaker 6 You know, he's a guy that once you talk to him, you realize he's extremely sharp.

Speaker 6 There's a reason that he went through the interview process for the Browns last year, and then he just got the job because I think he just handles himself well.

Speaker 3 Yeah. And he's bringing in a fullback, too.
Yeah. That's kind of of cool.

Speaker 6 We didn't have a fullback, yeah. It's nice to have one of those.

Speaker 1 Both teams in the Super Bowl have fullbacks. Do the math.

Speaker 1 Brown Super Bowl, guaranteed from Baker Mayfield.

Speaker 6 Yeah, I didn't say that.

Speaker 3 Your old coach, Freddie Kitchens, he's on the Giants now. And you guys play the Giants next year.
You already knew that.

Speaker 6 Yeah, well, I mean, that game's at MadLife in New York, and there's a reason for that. It's going to be the homecoming for number 13.

Speaker 3 Oh, that's right. So we got a double revenge game going on.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 6 I wouldn't say Freddy's is a double revenge, but you know.

Speaker 3 Well, it's you against Freddy. It's your revenge game against Freddy, and then Odell's against the Giants.

Speaker 1 And also Freddy.

Speaker 3 And Freddy, too. And Jarvis Landry's is a crazy revenge game.
It's crazy amounts of revenge game.

Speaker 1 It's everyone.

Speaker 6 You guys are like an M Night Shyamalan right now.

Speaker 1 Yeah, this is going to be the greatest game of all time. Were you when Odell and Jarvis after games would go and ask for the opposing team to come get them? Was that weird?

Speaker 1 That was a perfectly phrased question, don't you think? I thought it was perfect.

Speaker 6 No, I don't know.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I mean, that was a weird situation.

Speaker 6 I did get caught up in when he handed the goat hair cleats to Tom Brady.

Speaker 1 Oh, yes, that picture was bad

Speaker 6 being in the wrong place at the wrong time.

Speaker 1 That sucks. My face looks like

Speaker 6 pure disappointment.

Speaker 3 This is one of my favorite parts about sitting down and interviewing you:

Speaker 3 you laugh, but you know better than to laugh into the microphone.

Speaker 1 So you lean back and

Speaker 1 chuckle.

Speaker 3 So if you're just listening to the show, you might think that Baker absolutely hates us.

Speaker 1 No, put it on. I yawn.
Yeah, yawn at some of that. Yeah.

Speaker 1 We'll put it in laugh track.

Speaker 1 Every time you stop talking, it's just a laugh track. There it is.
It's perfect.

Speaker 1 Are you mad at me? You probably don't even know that I said this, but I'm going to back this up. Oklahoma deserves a one-year ban from the college football playoffs.

Speaker 1 Their performances, I'm sick of it.

Speaker 1 Our performance against Georgia wasn't bad. Yeah, no, no, you were the last.
Yes, your performance against Georgia was very, very good in the run.

Speaker 6 If we have another performance like that again, then yeah, I could get on board.

Speaker 1 Okay, here's what I'm really sick of. Every year, halfway through the season, Oklahoma loses a game.
Everyone says Oklahoma stinks. And then they come back and you win at the right time.
Right.

Speaker 1 And then they start playing defense. Everyone's like, you know what? Oklahoma's defense, not that bad.

Speaker 1 Not true. They are still bad.
The offense has never been the problem.

Speaker 1 You think it's fair?

Speaker 6 We haven't shown up at the right times. Okay.

Speaker 1 All right. So you take accountability.
That Rose Bowl game was fantastic. That was an all-time game.

Speaker 6 When we played Clemson that first year in the playoffs, they were pretty good, too. Yeah.

Speaker 6 They knocked both our running backs out, and so then they knew we were passing. So they were.

Speaker 3 You guys are a victim of bad scheduling. Yeah.

Speaker 1 It seems to ask me. Bad timing.

Speaker 6 Being in the wrong place at the wrong time.

Speaker 1 Yes.

Speaker 6 I've had a few of those in my life.

Speaker 1 Yes. Yeah.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 It seems to follow me. Yeah, like just being in the Big 12.
I think blaming.

Speaker 6 Yeah, I agree.

Speaker 1 Right. Yeah, blame Oklahoma.
Wrong place, wrong time.

Speaker 3 I'm blaming the NCAA for seeding Oklahoma against the Juggernauts every time. It's almost like they have an axe to grind against Oklahoma.

Speaker 1 Exactly. Right.
Yeah. Right.

Speaker 3 That's a good spin.

Speaker 6 Are we pulling the victim card out right now? Yeah, I like that.

Speaker 3 Listen, if you are a supporter of a big-time college football team, you have to have somebody to lash out because there's a conspiracy against every team.

Speaker 3 So now it's like directly you guys against the NCAA.

Speaker 3 And it used to be Georgia. You actually took that mantle from Georgia now.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 6 We like the underdog mentality, so yeah, we'll take it now.

Speaker 3 Yeah, um, I noticed that you're going on get up tomorrow morning.

Speaker 6 So it's a good cast tomorrow morning, yeah.

Speaker 3 A lot of people that really like me, yeah, so especially Rex Ryan on Get Up tomorrow.

Speaker 6 Uh, do you think he's gonna wear orange and brown?

Speaker 3 He probably will to try to like diffuse the situation a little bit, but don't fall for that. Nope, no, don't fall for it.
Can I give you like some things that you can use? I would love to.

Speaker 3 You're a quick guy, so I'm sure that you've you're gonna be prepared going into it uh if uh he starts talking about your season say uh i'd say that you really put your foot in your mouth but you'd probably enjoy that

Speaker 1 got him boom roasted i don't think you can come back from that no if you say that it's over

Speaker 3 you just walk off you can just walk off like it's an n1 mixtape yeah show's over

Speaker 6 That's a good one.

Speaker 3 That was my best material.

Speaker 1 I think that's all I need.

Speaker 3 Yeah, you just tell him you're not even the best coach in your family. Yeah.
Like, Rob is a better coach. Or, you know, he looks, and he's a better-looking guy.
He's got better hair. Yeah.

Speaker 5 Absolutely, the better hair part.

Speaker 1 You can also do the casual, hey, Rex, it looks like you lost weight, knowing he didn't. So it's like, what the hell? Like, I'm still really fat.
Like, that's a great one.

Speaker 1 That always hurts my feelings when people say that to me, and I haven't lost weight. You look good, though.
Thank you. That hurt my feelings.

Speaker 1 I'm dealing with a bad picture right now of my right breast that has been going around the internet.

Speaker 1 Whatever. It's, you know, bad bad timing.
Shadows, everything, like, it's a whole lighting, yeah.

Speaker 3 Right. And he did get off a plane like two days ago.
So again, the audio

Speaker 1 did that. Right.
I have a real question.

Speaker 1 Do you, offseason this year, will you do maybe less media coverage, everything, knowing how, like, last offseason, everyone got so... I mean, that's obviously not kind of out of your hands.

Speaker 6 Yeah, I was about to say, I don't think it's my choice. We went six and ten, so I don't think I'm going to be asked to do nearly as much.
Yeah. Yeah.
If we're just being honest.

Speaker 1 That's the thing that sucks, though. You guys had all the hype, and it's not really your fault.
It's kind of, you know, there's excitement about the Browns.

Speaker 1 There'll always be excitement about the Browns when you guys seem to be putting it together. Yeah.
And then that's really what it comes down to.

Speaker 1 Like, if you go into the season, people aren't expecting you to be great, that's when you can surprise them. So the Browns are going to stink next year.

Speaker 3 I don't want to say that because Baker looks like he's ready to kill me.

Speaker 1 No, no, no, no. This is how we do it.
I'm going to say it's not behind your back. Standard reels.
Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 1 You guys might not win a game.

Speaker 1 That's a bold strategy. Listen,

Speaker 1 he's getting ready to go.

Speaker 3 I don't mind talking trash about the Browns to amp Baker up, but I'm not going to say a word of shit about Swagger Jr. That's fair.

Speaker 1 Yeah, that's fair. Truly fair.

Speaker 3 So you'll win every home game. You'll go 8-8 next year.

Speaker 1 8-8. It's mad.
No road games. Yeah, right.
He's mad. Not a single road game.
Not the one in MetLife? The revenge game is messed up. That's messed up.
Give him 9-7.

Speaker 6 Quadruple revenge or whatever it is.

Speaker 3 Yeah. Are you going to stare down, Freddy? Like, I remember a couple years ago when he went to the Bengals and you guys weren't happy about him.

Speaker 3 Are you going to give him any looks, or what's the handshake going to be like?

Speaker 6 No, Freddie and I are good.

Speaker 1 We're good. Okay.
Not like a Hughes situation.

Speaker 6 No, it's a little different. Yeah.

Speaker 3 I always wondered about that clip that came out a couple years ago, or I guess it was your rookie year, when Freddy was talking up on the sidelines and he walked away and you go, man, that guy's an idiot.

Speaker 3 And everyone was like, oh, that's so funny. They get along.
They can rib each other a little bit. I thought that you actually did maybe think that Freddy had idiotic tendencies.

Speaker 6 No, no, he's not.

Speaker 3 You like him? You guys still on good terms?

Speaker 6 We are on good terms. Became close with his family, so it was, you know, kind of tough for me to deal with at the same time.
Yeah. I mean, we just,

Speaker 6 some of the things we put together behind the scenes, it just didn't work out, so we didn't have a chance in the get-go.

Speaker 1 All right, but it's the greatest comeback ever next year. I can't wait for you to go crazy next year and have everyone.

Speaker 6 I thought we weren't going to win a game.

Speaker 1 No, no, no. Now that was, this is us just talking off the cameras.
I can't wait for you to go crazy next year and we're going to dunk on everyone.

Speaker 6 If I could dunk, I would do it without you.

Speaker 1 We will dunk on everyone. The haters are going to be sick, and we're going to make them sick by your play.

Speaker 1 Physically, we're not going to do anything, but you will, and then we will reap all the benefits.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 3 That's how this works, right?

Speaker 1 That's how our relationship goes pretty much. So on my street, we get all the credit.

Speaker 6 That's why you guys are going to be on the front line to where, yeah, then in the season comes around.

Speaker 1 Exactly.

Speaker 3 Exactly. Do you think that that shirt is kind of a look-at-me move?

Speaker 3 it's a swaggy shirt i like it but it's like i just ripped a couple of my bandanas apart and i like that you made it yourself yeah stitch it together it's nice how many different colors do you have on there red blue green black it's like every part of the shirt is a different

Speaker 1 shirt i like that that's a miami shirt i'll put it that way you cannot wear that shirt in cleveland uh no no second you get to florida absolutely that thing comes on absolutely i actually my last question is going to be about that necklace it's uh the seeke question put in seek geek get promo uh ten dollars off if you want to go to a a Browns game next year, $10 off.

Speaker 1 $10 off. They're going to be expensive tickets because you're going to win so many games.
Put in promo code take.

Speaker 1 That chain,

Speaker 1 how much is that chain worth? Can we have it?

Speaker 1 How much do you want for it?

Speaker 1 It's a combined question. VSs? VVS.
VSs.

Speaker 3 I just learned what V1 is worth. Literally just worth two hours ago.

Speaker 1 I'm just going to say that. That's just two hours ago? Yeah.
Yeah.

Speaker 6 I keep it right here in case I forget my own jersey number.

Speaker 1 No, that's a cool chain. I like that chain.
That's a cool move. I wish I had a jersey number that I could wear a chain like that.
So wait, how much is that chain worth?

Speaker 1 I didn't get it. Oh, your wife got it for you? Yeah, she did.
That's a great present. Thank you.
Okay.

Speaker 1 Okay. How much was it?

Speaker 1 Enough. Enough.
Enough. Enough.
Okay.

Speaker 3 I have one real question for you. So you've switched coordinators.

Speaker 3 You've had like different playbooks, different terminology, I would imagine. Some different stuff going on.

Speaker 3 For us, that's like we switched from WordPress to a different blogging platform over the summer, and I just refuse to change over. I'm still using it.

Speaker 1 Twitter to TikTok.

Speaker 3 Yeah, so I'm still using the old, I'm still on WordPress. Are you going to, like, do you have any resistance to that? You're like, hey, can't I just use the same play calls?

Speaker 6 No, I'm pretty much at this point just asking for at least one solid year of the same playbook. Yes.
That'd be nice. Some sort of consistency for me would be good.

Speaker 3 Does that have like a big impact in your offseason? Because you have to spend so much time not working on like the physical stuff, but just like learning new words.

Speaker 6 Yeah, there's definitely the learning curve for it. And for everybody else on the offense as well.
You know, because

Speaker 6 nobody's going to have the same things going on. So it's new for everybody, but it definitely takes time away from building on what you already have.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 1 Well, we're still on Team Baker. I think we might be

Speaker 1 just us and your family. That's okay.
That's fine. We're Team Baker through.

Speaker 6 You got to start somewhere.

Speaker 1 Yeah. The people out there who are going at you will have their day.
Also, thank you for beating the Ravens week three.

Speaker 6 It was their last loss till the most recent one.

Speaker 1 Right, because that made me think they were frauds, and then I got a lot of shit for saying they were frauds. Then they lost in the playoffs, and look who was on the right side of history.
Me.

Speaker 1 That's who. Right.
So you did that. You did that.
You made me look good.

Speaker 1 But yeah, this is going to be a great year. I'm excited.
And we're going to dunk on everyone. Oh, I can't wait.
I have a list.

Speaker 6 Checking it twice?

Speaker 3 First one, Colin Clownherd. Yep.
That's his new name now. It just came up with that.

Speaker 6 Feel free to use that. You might be the first person to ever say that.

Speaker 3 Ever say that.

Speaker 1 Cow turd.

Speaker 3 Clown turd.

Speaker 1 Got him. Got him up.

Speaker 3 Got him.

Speaker 1 All right, Baker. Thank you so much.
Appreciate it. Best of luck next year.
Hopefully, we talked to you beforehand, but you are.

Speaker 1 It's coming back. I want to look at what camera.

Speaker 3 It's coming home. You guys are fucked up.

Speaker 1 We're going to fuck you up.

Speaker 6 Did I look at this one?

Speaker 1 Yeah, say we're going to fuck you up. I'm good.
Good luck on Get Up tomorrow.

Speaker 3 He said, be looking out for that line, the foot-in-the-mouth one. That's going to be a home run.

Speaker 6 That's going to be game time.

Speaker 1 When are we putting this interview out? Probably for like two weeks.

Speaker 3 Okay. So disregard if he turtles up and just lets Greenie dominate him like the alpha male he is.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 3 That's the one you got to watch out for is Greenie. He's a sneaky alpha.

Speaker 6 I can't wait to see what Marcus Spears does.

Speaker 3 Oh, there we go.

Speaker 1 You got a big day coming tomorrow. Yeah.
All right. We got your back.
Don't worry. We'll make sure that we're always forever.
Yeah.

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Speaker 1 Okay, let's get some segments. Before we do that, though, we have the conclusion to the Baker Mayfield story of PFT telling him he should completely dunk on Rex Ryan on Get Up.

Speaker 3 I thought it was a pretty sneaky way to kind of get in there and, you know, seem like he was apologizing, but still let Baker be Baker. So he went on Get Up.

Speaker 3 Apologies to Greene that this happened under your watch. But we got to stick up for a guy, Baker.

Speaker 1 So here it is.

Speaker 9 What did you learn about the dynamics of the NFL that you couldn't translate that kind of M.O. from college?

Speaker 6 It's a humbling experience.

Speaker 1 It's a good vulgar instrument.

Speaker 6 Let's just be honest. I put my foot in my mouth a lot this past year, and I'm going to internalize that, and I think that's the way I need to handle it.

Speaker 6 I mean, rest in peace, Kobe but that's the way he did it yeah he motivated himself he didn't talk a lot he talked to his teammates drove them to be better people better men and so that's the way I need to handle it I don't need to respond to the things that don't matter the things that don't help us win let's just be honest I put my foot in my mouth a lot this past year love it what did Rex do you think he knew right away no you don't think so Baker didn't know and what was funny was after that interview

Speaker 3 Schefter and a lot of other NFL reporters were like quoting that interview including my internet dad your internet uncle Mike Florio, saying, is this a sign that Baker Mayfield has matured?

Speaker 3 Oh, I love it. And the Cleveland media was like, I love it.
Baker's sane and doing all the right things. Baker's going to be Baker.

Speaker 1 Let Baker be Baker.

Speaker 3 You don't tell a caged bird not to sing.

Speaker 1 Correct. All right, let's do some segments.
First up, we have a Way to Stay Relevant Handball. So Handball's mad at us.
I can't believe we're here. I can't believe this was when we had Jay Cutler on.

Speaker 1 I thought maybe someone in the Chicago media would get mad, or maybe Mike Martz, or like any number of things.

Speaker 1 Turns out, the only fall-up from Jay Cutler being on the show was the world of handball is very upset that he would imply he could be a gold medal handballist. I also handballist?

Speaker 3 Handballist.

Speaker 1 Yeah, right.

Speaker 3 This is the Olympics for handball is not actually the Olympics. It's responding to everybody that says that USA could dominate in the Olympics if we put our other athletes in handball reforms.

Speaker 3 That is their time to shine every four four years. And they're not mad.
They're just disappointed with Jay for saying that. But I still think it's kind of true.

Speaker 1 I mean, it's 100% true. No offense to handballists.
I'm sure you're very nice people.

Speaker 1 But you play a sport that if we decided to stop playing all the other sports, there would be a lot of guys better than what you're doing. Right.
I'm sorry.

Speaker 1 I apologize for absolutely nothing. I'll put it this way.

Speaker 3 I'll put it this way.

Speaker 3 If we were to take our best NFL players and put them in rugby uniforms, and Lamar Jackson was a fly half, and we had guys like Halodi Nada and Damak and Sue and all these big motherfuckers out there run people over, we would be much, much better at rugby if they were to grow up playing the sport.

Speaker 1 Right, and it's not like we joke about the soccer thing. I think soccer is a little different.

Speaker 1 I don't think that we could just be like, hey, our best players in basketball could go play soccer at a high level. That's clearly,

Speaker 1 that's a world-class sport, a high-level sport. Handball,

Speaker 1 handball is a fucking thing. It's not world-class.
It's recess. Playing recess.

Speaker 3 They kind of are a little bit.

Speaker 1 What are we talking about?

Speaker 1 It's an Olympic sport.

Speaker 3 There is some strategy to it.

Speaker 5 The honorable thing you can do as a human is get a gold medal in the Olympics. Is it?

Speaker 1 And if you play, maybe. And if you play handball, then you can do that.

Speaker 3 Listen,

Speaker 3 I've looked up the rules of handball.

Speaker 1 Football, not an Olympics football.

Speaker 3 It's not easy. I'm sure it would take at least three months for our guys to get acclimated to it.
But you just put them in a training camp.

Speaker 1 It actually looks really easy. It looks super easy.
Listen, okay, two and a half months of training. And again, I'm not saying that I would be a gold medal handballist.
I'd be probably

Speaker 1 a top pro.

Speaker 3 We are saying that because we'd be on the team.

Speaker 1 But Jake Hutler was like, there's only 32 NFL starting quarterbacks.

Speaker 1 His arm is better than any handballist arm. This is crazy.

Speaker 3 Let's put together, just using recurring guess from part of my take, a hypothetical starting, how many players play handball?

Speaker 3 Six and a half or something.

Speaker 3 Let's just say six, because eight seems like a lot of names.

Speaker 1 I'm watching it right now. They are playing a game that you invent to kill time at your office.
Okay.

Speaker 3 Part of it, like shelf ball.

Speaker 1 Yeah, you're like, hey, look at this. We got this little soccer ball that I picked up when I went to an MLS game for free.

Speaker 3 We could almost do it just using guests from birthday week.

Speaker 1 This is ridiculous.

Speaker 3 Stu Feiner, Danny Woodhead.

Speaker 1 Dude, this is handball. I'm sorry.
It looks like a really, really fun sport. I will say that.

Speaker 1 Like, if we had the ability to play handball, if there was a handball court, it looks like a very, very fun sport to play. But other than that, nah.
Nah. Like, could a handballist play in the NFL?

Speaker 1 Could a handballist play in Major League Baseball? Come on. This is crazy.

Speaker 3 Okay, let's compile that team, though.

Speaker 3 Just based.

Speaker 1 Who? Kyle Lutz.

Speaker 3 Cutter? Yeah, yeah, Jay Cutler.

Speaker 1 Kyle Long.

Speaker 3 Kyle Long, Phil Hughes, probably.

Speaker 1 Phil Hughes. The Gass in there.
Yeah, we were saying Sam Decker and goal. I mean, he would stop everything.

Speaker 3 Both Blakes. Yeah, both Blakes.
Maybe even Kelly.

Speaker 5 Gary Busey as the coach.

Speaker 1 Perfect.

Speaker 1 We'll just be on the bench. We'll be team morale.

Speaker 3 Samuel Jackson as the coach would be pretty good, too.

Speaker 1 I'm trying to think who else we could have on that would be. I don't know if he'd be believable as a coach.

Speaker 3 No, probably not. You're right.

Speaker 1 In Delhi. Anyone who can jump a little bit.
Deli's like not. I feel like

Speaker 1 Deli might not be.

Speaker 3 No, the only reason I said Delhi is because he probably grew up playing some handball in Australia.

Speaker 1 Right, he probably played basketball because handball didn't work out.

Speaker 5 If it was just all QBs, it was just Jared, Blake, Mahomes, Cuddy.

Speaker 1 Not only that, but they're all bigger than everyone I'm watching play handball.

Speaker 3 All right. We'll put Danny Woodhead on their channel.

Speaker 1 That's enough handball. Let's go to another spot.
Billy football.

Speaker 3 Billy Football could actually be an Olympian handball player.

Speaker 1 Of course. Let's talk some XFL.
We'll do some

Speaker 1 preview. XFL preview.

Speaker 1 Okay, so I don't know what the teams are. I'm looking right now.
Okay. How do you want to do the preview?

Speaker 1 Well, so I got the dragons.

Speaker 3 Here's what I'll tell you. I've got the team over-unders.
So you want to do team over-unders for the year? Sure. Or do you want to do a weekend preview of XFL? How many teams are there?

Speaker 1 Yeah. How many teams are there?

Speaker 3 There are one, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight teams. Too many.

Speaker 3 That's already too many teams.

Speaker 1 Too many teams. Give me four teams.

Speaker 1 All right, so we're going to do half. Four random teams that I can give an over-under.

Speaker 3 Tampa Bay Vipers.

Speaker 3 You're going to take the over.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I like Seven and a half. I like them.
I like their logo. I'm looking at it right now.

Speaker 3 You know who their coach is?

Speaker 1 Their logo looks like a vagina.

Speaker 3 You know what their coach is. Who? Trustman.
Mark Tressman.

Speaker 1 All right, I'll take the under.

Speaker 3 Yeah, exactly.

Speaker 1 Yeah, not the vagina thing.

Speaker 3 I don't know where they're coming up with these 7.5

Speaker 3 over-under. Dallas Renegades.

Speaker 1 How many games are there?

Speaker 3 There are 10 games. So they're anticipating that Mark Tressman is going to be a team

Speaker 3 to an 800 record. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Mark Tressman, you know what? I'm going to take the over on the Vipers. I want Mark Tressman to do well.

Speaker 1 I'm rooting for this.

Speaker 3 Mark Tressman is good in leagues that don't

Speaker 3 really matter yet.

Speaker 1 Right. Oh, you put a yet in there.

Speaker 3 Yeah, because the XFL is going to take over. Got it.

Speaker 1 Got it. Yeah, I'll take the over for Mark Tressman.
I'm rooting for him. I want him to do it.
Are you really? Yes, no. I am.

Speaker 3 Wouldn't that be like a dagger twist in your heart if he was the best XFL coach of all time?

Speaker 1 No, because Mark Tressman is like one of those blips in the radar where you just have to have enough time go by where you're like, you know what? It wasn't you. It was us.

Speaker 1 Like, the Bears suck no matter what. It doesn't matter who's the coach.

Speaker 3 Their quarterback's Aaron Murray. So I think that's where the 7.5, they're like, oh, he was good

Speaker 3 at one point.

Speaker 3 Next team we'll go to is Dallas Renegades. Their over-under is six.

Speaker 1 Who's their quarterback?

Speaker 3 Their quarterback is Landry Jones, if healthy, but he had some sort of knee issue, I think. Six? So it might not be Landry Jones.

Speaker 1 I'll take the over.

Speaker 3 Their coach is Bob Stoops, which is good.

Speaker 3 I'm taking the over for the Renegades as well.

Speaker 3 If it's not Landry Jones, it would be either PJ Nelson or Eric Dungy at quarterback. So I don't know.

Speaker 1 Are those real people?

Speaker 3 Philip Nelson. I think I might have just invented the fact that his name is PJ.
PJ is a better quarterback than Phil Nelson.

Speaker 1 Okay, so we got the over there.

Speaker 3 We'll take the over there. Houston Roughnecks,

Speaker 3 six.

Speaker 3 Their coach is Jim Jones,

Speaker 1 ball.

Speaker 3 June Jones, excuse me. June Jones obviously likes Hawaii.

Speaker 5 They should get Joe Jones in there.

Speaker 1 If he wears a lei, then I'm taking the over.

Speaker 3 Yes, I'm going to take the over regardless because

Speaker 1 Phil Nelson went from Minnesota to Rutgers to East Carolina.

Speaker 3 Collect them all. What a journey.

Speaker 1 What a journey.

Speaker 3 What a journey. Minnesota, Rutgers, ECU.
Yes.

Speaker 1 What a journey.

Speaker 3 Pretty diverse set. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Okay, what's the last one?

Speaker 3 I was going to give the last team total as DC defenders instead of them. We'll go with the Seattle Dragons.

Speaker 1 I like them. Over.
Cole Tracy. Yeah, over.
Cole Tracy. Cole Tracy.
Say no more.

Speaker 3 Okay, so they're over-under with

Speaker 1 they're here.

Speaker 3 It's only three and a half. Oh, so we're taking this over on that disrespecting.
Jim Zorn, right? Jim Zorn. So this weekend is actually a revenge game for Jim Zorn coming back to D.C.
How are they?

Speaker 1 Like, I would imagine the XFL, like, they're flying on, like, Southwest.

Speaker 3 Don't know. Well, yeah, obviously if it's Seattle, that's everyone.

Speaker 1 But that's

Speaker 1 far. No, I'm saying, like, that's a far trip.
These teams are far, far, you know, this is going to be a lot of mileage up here.

Speaker 3 You know what else is cool?

Speaker 1 They definitely don't have their own planes, right?

Speaker 3 When it's the Dragons, it's the Seattle Dragons, but they're abbreviated as the Sea Dragons, SEA Dragons. Nice.
Which is a nice little touch there. I'll take that.
I'm taking the over on them as well.

Speaker 1 Okay, so that's our XFL preview. We have a thoughts and prayers to the NFL because they're getting sued for having too erotic of a halftime show during the Super Bowl.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 So what's exactly going on?

Speaker 3 There's a guy that's suing the NFL because he got too horny during the halftime show. And as a Christian.
Lordy. Yeah, well, literally, Lordy, because it's great it made him

Speaker 3 it made him violate his Christian beliefs so he's suing the NFL for like hundreds of millions of dollars Mike Wilbon's mad that everyone's making fun of Lordy yeah fuck it I'm gonna sue him he should be honestly he should just be suing his own penis because obviously he's doing this just to get attention right

Speaker 3 I actually think he might have a case a class action lawsuit maybe we could join that was a very erotic halftime show listen XFL you need to just say you need to plant stories that people are suing you because your halftime shows are too erotic.

Speaker 3 Yes.

Speaker 1 If you want viewers, I listen, this guy, I would like to see it go through court because I think he might have a case.

Speaker 3 Your Honor,

Speaker 3 the butts, there were two butts at the same time on stage.

Speaker 1 She was doing something with her tongue,

Speaker 1 and then I ejected.

Speaker 3 And my wife

Speaker 3 got angry, and I got an erection, Your Honor. It was awful.

Speaker 1 All right. Last thought before we get to FAQ Saber Metrics.
So you have this PFT. There's big Guinness Book of World Records.

Speaker 3 There's some drama. Big Big time drama.
There's drama out in the streets right now.

Speaker 3 Finley, the golden retriever, set a Guinness Book of World Records record for fitting six tennis balls in his mouth at once.

Speaker 1 That's it? For some reason, I thought Finley did like 15.

Speaker 3 Six is a lot of balls. I know it is.
How many balls have you ever had in your mouth at once?

Speaker 3 I've had four. Yeah.

Speaker 1 You have? Yeah, I've had four balls in my mouth.

Speaker 3 Yeah, something like that. Yeah.

Speaker 3 But, yeah, so he had six tennis balls in his mouth. Okay.
That's a lot for a golden retriever.

Speaker 3 But the big wigs at Guinness won't recognize it because they said that its owners didn't submit the right paperwork, which is ridiculous.

Speaker 1 Wait, but can't Finley just do it again?

Speaker 3 I don't know. I don't know the whole process for it.
I think you have to get somebody from Guinness to fly. You probably have to pay them to fly somebody into your town.

Speaker 3 This is where it gets all convoluted, and it's really, frankly, quite out of date that Guinness, a beer company, is in charge of record keeping.

Speaker 1 I used to love that book, though. It was a great book.
Like the late 90s, that was basically the internet. I was going through it and being like, look at all these weird records.

Speaker 3 The more I think about it, the more of a racket it becomes. You clearly have to just pay Guinness to send a representative to hang out with you for a day.
Then they're like, yeah, whatever.

Speaker 3 Okay, I'll sign off on your dumb record. Yes.
Finley, the golden retriever, is getting screwed by the red tape of all of it. So hashtag justice for Finley.

Speaker 1 Yeah, let's get Finley the record.

Speaker 3 This is bullshit. Six balls.

Speaker 1 Six balls.

Speaker 1 For some reason, I was like, I expect you, yeah, say a dozen balls. Six is a lot.

Speaker 3 A dozen

Speaker 1 would kill a trick.

Speaker 1 Yeah, yeah, but I don't know. That should be the bigger go home.

Speaker 3 Hey, listen, dude, perfect. If you want your next trick shot, just jam 12 balls into Cody's mouth.

Speaker 1 Yeah, if he's still alive. We haven't seen him.

Speaker 3 Well, that's what I'm saying. It'd be a good way to hypothetically

Speaker 3 off Cody.

Speaker 1 Bark if Cody. I bet you one of them listens.

Speaker 3 Probably.

Speaker 1 Because we bashed the ginger beard. Yeah.
And they're like, this is awesome. The twins.

Speaker 3 The twins definitely text each other and they're like, hey, they did it again.

Speaker 1 They did it again. They got him.

Speaker 1 FAQs.

Speaker 5 Sup pandemic FT and big corona. If the coronavirus pandemic somehow turned into a zombie apocalypse, what location would you try to reach for the best possibility of survival?

Speaker 3 I would go to

Speaker 3 Adam Morrison's bunker.

Speaker 1 The Adam Morrison's bunker. East River.

Speaker 1 I feel like zombies don't go in water. No, that's.
I've never been a really big zombie guy.

Speaker 3 Zombies don't go in water? Is that true? It's gremlins.

Speaker 1 No, I think zombies can't swim.

Speaker 1 I don't know.

Speaker 1 Again, Again, I've never been a zombie.

Speaker 3 I haven't either. It's weird that zombies became like a thing that everybody talked about, right? Right.
Like, even fun and cod,

Speaker 5 but the movies and stuff.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I remember Sean of the Dead. Like, that's...
Maybe we'll do that for Barstow Gold.

Speaker 3 Zombiland.

Speaker 1 Oh, yeah, by the way, BarstowGold.com/slash PMT. We should do that.
We should interview someone who's just really into zombies.

Speaker 5 We're also working on a handball expert.

Speaker 3 Ooh, that's huge. I feel like zombie guys are the same, like, uh, internet people as epic bacon guys.
Yeah. You know, like, ooh, I love zombies and bacon

Speaker 3 sriracha.

Speaker 1 Yeah, they definitely brew their own beer, too.

Speaker 3 It's my identity.

Speaker 1 They got their, yeah, they brew their own beer

Speaker 1 in their basement.

Speaker 3 My zombie IPA. Mm-hmm.

Speaker 5 Hey, Dad, Cat, and PFT Caucusator.

Speaker 3 Okay. Was that a thing?

Speaker 3 No idea. Can I spell that? I think it's Caucasus.
C-A-U-C Caucusator.

Speaker 3 Okay, Caucus, yeah. Caucusator.
Caucus guy.

Speaker 5 I have been listening to the show for a while and have recently gotten both my mom and dad to listen to the show. They love it and are full AWLs.

Speaker 5 We were watching Super Bowl Media Day video, and my mom had an idea for next year.

Speaker 5 Ask all AWLs to dress up as Big Cat and PFT so you guys can get through security and PFT doesn't get arrested in podcast form again.

Speaker 1 This is like the Where's Waldo where everyone's Waldo. Ooh, that is a very

Speaker 1 good idea. We should absolutely

Speaker 1 just do a PMT con. A birthday party.
No, a PMT con an hour before Media Day right outside Media Day.

Speaker 3 And we'll all get dressed up. Yeah.
And we'll have a buttload of fake credentials ready to go.

Speaker 1 And then we won't even go in.

Speaker 3 We'll just hang it. Yeah, we totally won't go in.
You're right. Right.
We're not going to go in.

Speaker 1 We won't. But other people will.

Speaker 5 Hey, Slim Commentary and Short Cat was wondering if it's okay to skip a quiz in a class I've already failed twice to go to a concert on a Tuesday night. Mr.
Cat, Mr. Commentary, back to you.

Speaker 1 Twice?

Speaker 5 Also shout out Hey, Slim.

Speaker 1 Our quizzes are supposed to be easy.

Speaker 3 This is a class.

Speaker 5 Unless it's like a five-question quiz or something. One of those.

Speaker 1 Tests are hard. Quizzes are easy.

Speaker 3 No, this is a class that he's failed twice.

Speaker 1 No, but he said the quiz, he's failed twice.

Speaker 5 If it's okay to skip a quiz in a class, I've already failed.

Speaker 1 Probably shouldn't.

Speaker 3 I'm beginning to see a pattern of maybe why you failed this class twice.

Speaker 1 Yeah, go for it. Go for it.

Speaker 3 No, just be you. What did we learn earlier today from Baker Mayfield? Yeah.
Just be you.

Speaker 1 Guinness Book of World Records have most times failed the same class. Go for it.

Speaker 3 Just cheat.

Speaker 3 Why haven't you cheated yet? The second time you went through that class, you should have cheated. Yeah.

Speaker 5 Will this finally be the year we can get a Mount Rushmore of airports?

Speaker 1 Ooh.

Speaker 1 Probably not. No,

Speaker 1 yeah, we'll definitely do that.

Speaker 1 Sure.

Speaker 1 We do talk about doing airport reviews, more of them,

Speaker 1 on the reg.

Speaker 1 We were going to do it. We're going to New Orleans.
We talked about it.

Speaker 3 Flash Mob Airport Review. New Orleans Airport was excellent.
I can't even remember. It's a lot better than it used to be.
Boom. Reviewed.

Speaker 5 All right, last one. What's up, guys? I've been battling with a case of a sore throat and stuffy nose all week.

Speaker 5 All coronavirus jokes aside, I'm trying to decide whether I should play in my intermural three-on-three basketball game. If I play and do well, I'm a legend like Jordan's flu game.

Speaker 5 If I play and do poorly, my friends will hate me. Give me some guidance, please.

Speaker 1 Don't be the asshole to get everyone else sick.

Speaker 5 But don't be the asshole to lose your team at intermural championship.

Speaker 1 He's their best player? He doesn't say.

Speaker 3 Is he the Mike Dean? Do they have subs? He's not their best player. Do they have subs on this team? That's a big question.
Three on three.

Speaker 5 If you're one. He might be the only sub.

Speaker 1 Okay, so if you're

Speaker 1 it's three on three basketball? What the fuck?

Speaker 5 Intramural three on three basketball. Big three.

Speaker 3 I say do it. Yeah, go ahead and do it.

Speaker 1 I say do it.

Speaker 3 Drink a lot of Gatorade beforehand. Bring that ice thing that Jordan put on the back of his neck.
Yeah, do it. Do it.
The team on your back.

Speaker 1 Yeah. And then if you don't win, just say you're not sick.
So wait till the end. If you win, be like, hey, guess what, guys? I'm really, really sick.
If you don't win, just be like, I'm fine.

Speaker 1 And then watch them all get sick.

Speaker 3 Also, good news is you're going to get your opponent sick. So if they beat you,

Speaker 3 you get the last laugh.

Speaker 1 Cough on them. Maybe wear a mask while you're playing.

Speaker 3 That would be actually very

Speaker 1 mind games. Mind games.
All right. We'll see everyone on Monday.
Enjoy your weekend.

Speaker 1 Football's back.

Speaker 3 Football is back. And Ovie just scored his 700th goal.

Speaker 1 There you go.

Speaker 1 Big weekend.

Speaker 1 You're predicting.

Speaker 3 I'm predicting. I'm going to be at the Caps game on Saturday night.
I'm going to see him score two more goals. And

Speaker 3 now he's officially better than Wayne Gretzky.

Speaker 1 Perfect.

Speaker 3 Love you guys.

Speaker 3 All the time for you, I'm okay.

Speaker 3 Take on me out

Speaker 3 Somebody else to say

Speaker 3 Somebody swear.

Speaker 3 Say after me.

Speaker 3 It's Pardon My Take presented by Bar Stool Sports.