Super Bowl 54, The Chiefs Are Champs + Gardner Minshew

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Speaker 1 On today's part of my take,

Speaker 1 the end of football. Super Bowl 54.
It was a fun one. The Kansas City Chiefs are Super Bowl champions.
Patrick Mahomes has finally reached his destination as Super Bowl MVP.

Speaker 1 And we recap the entire game. We also have our good friend Gardner Minshew on the show, who might be a Blake.
We will decide.

Speaker 1 Great interview with him. And we have who's back of the week.

Speaker 3 Before we do that, when Cool creamy ranch meets tangy, bold buffalo, the whole is greater than the sum of its sauce.

Speaker 3 Say howdy, partner, to new Buffalo Ranch sauce only at McDonald's for a limited time.

Speaker 1 Participating McDonald's. Okay,

Speaker 1 let's go.

Speaker 1 Now in the street, there is violence,

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Speaker 1 Today is Monday, February 3rd,

Speaker 1 Super Bowl 54.

Speaker 1 I'm going to lose my voice. What?

Speaker 1 Even more than it is.

Speaker 1 In the 305, the big dolly. Dolly, Dolly,

Speaker 1 where Andy Reid was looking to steal Jimmy Buffett Garoppolo's cheeseburger in Paradise.

Speaker 1 Kyle Shanahan didn't want to be accused of choking away the game with a big lead, so he went into halftime with a tie.

Speaker 1 The halftime show had little boom standing at attention, if you know what I mean, Tege.

Speaker 1 And the game really kicked off in the fourth quarter when the Niners, up 20-10, ran the Kyle Shanahan up in a Super Bowl offense to full effect.

Speaker 1 The Chiefs defense stood up late with help from this land is your land, this land is Bashad Bri land, and the comeback was on.

Speaker 1 Playoff Damien, as the kids call him, stumbled and bumbled in for the go-ahead score, and then tacked on another, as even an earthquake couldn't stop this snake from slithering into the end zone.

Speaker 1 Andy Creed can finally embrace the Lombardi trophy with arms wide open, and his franchise quarterback wins his first of what should be many Super Bowl MVPs.

Speaker 1 We finished with that MVP, Patrick Mahomes, down on the sideline. Patrick.
Thanks, Boo, for kicking it down to me. Don't you worry, I'm going to Disney World with goofy Mickey Donald and Daisy Duck.

Speaker 1 This was a roller coaster of the season. I want to thank my good buddy Andy Reed.

Speaker 1 I'm going to be seeing him early at the character breakfast every day. Hey, Andy, I hope they make your gold jacket and matching Tommy Bahama apron says.

Speaker 1 Hall of Flame for your legendary cookouts, coach. I love the single-winged plague haul out there.
Got snap Philly special.

Speaker 1 I call that one the KC Masterpiece, because I don't know if you saw our dance moves, but we all had the sauce. On a real note, I'd like to thank all our fans.
I love you, Gas. Hey, Big Cat.

Speaker 1 Thanks for coming out. You can take that however you make.

Speaker 1 Nah, Chiefs 31, 49ers, 20, and that's it. Those are your Super Bowl champion, Kansas City Chiefs, hailing from Kansas, the state of Kansas.
Yep, embrace debate. Is Kansas in Kansas or Missouri?

Speaker 1 Listen, there are Kansas City Chiefs fans in Kansas and in Missouri, but that is your Super Bowl. Super Bowl 54.
Andy Reid is finally a Super Bowl champion.

Speaker 1 Patrick Mahomes wins his first Super Bowl title of what should be many Super Bowl MVP.

Speaker 1 But the story, and we'll get to the Chiefs, but the story for right now. Tom Brady will be a Raider.
Yeah, holy shit. The 49ers kind of blew that one.
So they were up 20 to 10.

Speaker 1 And

Speaker 1 Kyle Verlander? Well, the game came down. It really did come down to one play.

Speaker 1 I know that no game really comes down to one play, but the Chiefs are third and 15 on their own 35, seven minutes left and down 10.

Speaker 1 And Patrick Mahomes makes an unreal play to Tyreek Hill, where he was under pressure all night, bombed a Tyreek Hill. That basically decided the game.

Speaker 1 And the 49ers are going to sit and be like, holy shit, we had it. Up 10 with seven minutes left.
Right.

Speaker 1 You know, in that situation where if you stop them there, they're probably going to have to punt.

Speaker 1 and if you can run the ball and get a few first downs the game's all all pretty much over and kyle shanahan now i'm not gonna call him a choke artist because he's an unbelievable coach disrespectful to artists but his last two super bowls now 28 to 3 and 20 to 10 with seven minutes left that's got to be tough to live with uh yeah it is but the chiefs offense has done this all year long.

Speaker 1 Of course. And they did it in the playoffs.
This is, what, his third double-digit comeback or the Chiefs' third double-digit comeback that they've had since the playoffs started.

Speaker 1 So, like, just because they're behind 10, that's not that big of a deficit when their offense can get down the field that quickly.

Speaker 1 Pat Mahomes obviously had some struggles in this game. I think he probably played the worst three quarters of his entire season.
He was under pressure in the first three quarters.

Speaker 1 Not only was he under pressure, yeah, that's part of it, but he was also just making some ugly throws and missing guys. Like, the interception that he had, that wasn't really because of pressure.

Speaker 1 That was because he just didn't see a linebacker. That was a straight frustration throw.
Yeah. Where he's like, I'm just going to throw it to this guy as hard as I can and hope it works.

Speaker 1 And it didn't work. I mean, I think that the Niners lost it much earlier than you do.
I think that they really lost the game at the end of the second quarter when it was 10-10. Well, yeah.

Speaker 1 And Kyle Shanahan, that was the more puzzling thing for me than the end of the game. I don't think that Kyle really choked away the fourth quarter.

Speaker 1 I think that he just didn't play aggressively enough at the end of the first half. Oh, yeah.
And that does two things. So, one, it prevents you from getting points

Speaker 1 potentially at the end of of that half obviously if you're not going to try to run any plays but two i feel like it also sends a message to your team that you don't trust your guys you don't trust your quarterback to make big throws at the end of a half and he didn't at the end of the game and he didn't at the end of the game i think that like it takes a little bit of the wind out like you have to be thinking if you're in that niners locker room around that niners sideline at the time like what are we doing they even showed john lynch up in the booth trying to call time by the way i think that owners and general managers should be able to call timeouts from the booth.

Speaker 1 I think that'd be great. A nice little addition to the game.
Just get it. Yeah, getting in the game.

Speaker 1 But like, everyone knew that what he was doing didn't make any sense because the Chiefs are that good at scoring points.

Speaker 1 10-10 is not a comfortable place to be at, even though Kyle Shanahan said, I feel good at 10-10. So

Speaker 1 that I agree with that. The only thing that we should also mention then is that the George Kittle pass interference was kind of a bullshit call.

Speaker 1 And now he was deciding to to play the way that he played, you know, well before that by not calling a timeout when the Chiefs were ready to punt.

Speaker 1 And you're right, because the Chiefs come into that game in the first half, Andy Reid's going for it. He went for it twice on fourth down.

Speaker 1 The 49ers are kicking field goals, thinking they can beat the Chiefs with field goals, not. pushing it at the end of the half, being content with a 10-10 tie when you have three timeouts.

Speaker 1 And I guess if you wanted to play Devil's Advocate, you'd say, well, if we don't get a first down, the Chiefs who also have three timeouts are the more explosive offense of the two.

Speaker 1 But still, you have to, you play to win the game. Hello? You play to win the game.
And Kyle Shanahan didn't play to win the game in that moment. But, but even with that, up 20 to 10,

Speaker 1 that's, I mean, that's got to fucking kill. And I'm sure there's Niner fans who are, if you're, most Niner fans, I would hope, would just shut off all media for the next like three weeks.

Speaker 1 But if you are listening to this podcast right now, let me just say it again: 20 to 10 with seven minutes left. Fuck.

Speaker 1 Fuck.

Speaker 1 That's brutal.

Speaker 1 If you're in a Niners fans position right now, do you actually go off the grid or do you say? Because sometimes

Speaker 1 I'd say that I'm not going to watch any TV on Monday. I'm not going to watch any of the morning shows.

Speaker 1 And it's tough for me to not watch Mike Greenberg when I need to know what his opinions and takes are and like what his wife was saying to him in the fourth quarter when he was falling asleep.

Speaker 1 I can't do it.

Speaker 1 No matter what a heartbreaking loss it is, if it's a game seven where the Penguins beat the Capitals, I will still. ESPN doesn't show hockey.
They don't show hockey,

Speaker 1 but I will still watch something because there's a sadistic part of being a sports fan

Speaker 1 that has to go through the misery. I'm sure there are Niners fans right now that are listening.
I'm sure there are. But the majority, you have to just turn it off.

Speaker 1 You have to shut it all off and just pretend that this game didn't happen. You literally just go through work.

Speaker 1 You go through your week pretending that football didn't exist for the entire season because you're up 10 with seven minutes left and you don't come away Super Bowl champions.

Speaker 1 And Andy Reid was aggressive.

Speaker 1 But at the end of the day, I'm sure there's going to be like the nerd revolution, which, of course, it's good for the sport. And I lean many times on the side of analytics.

Speaker 1 We'll say, well, look at the Chiefs. They pass more than any team in the NFL this year.
Like,

Speaker 1 this is the future of the NFL. Well, guess what? It also is the future of the NFL when you have the best quarterback in the league.
That is a good way to build a franchise. I'll put it this way.

Speaker 1 Get the best quarterback and let him be the best quarterback. And that's what Patrick Mahomes is.
Right.

Speaker 1 If you had taken this exact same game plan and aggressiveness, except with, I don't know, Mitchell Trubisky at quarterback instead of Pat Mahomes,

Speaker 1 it probably wouldn't work out. You're the lowest common denominator troll on Twitter.
I'll put it this way. I'll put it this way, Big Cat.

Speaker 1 What if you just switched quarterbacks and you ran the exact same offenses?

Speaker 1 I actually think that the Niners would win with Pat Mahomes

Speaker 1 at quarterback. What do you mean, they would kill him? But what I'm saying is, even if you only let Pat Mahomes throw the ball like eight times a game and still run that rushing offense.

Speaker 1 But I do love the take that this game was the battle for the future of the NFL because the offensive structure of both teams are so different and how they go about things.

Speaker 1 Like one's the running game, the other's the passing game. But the four Niners passed.
But they passed today. They passed today.

Speaker 1 But I just like the fact that some people are framing it like this is...

Speaker 1 pound you in the face football for the Niners and on the other side we've got the sudden offense the Chiefs no see I don't I disagree with that because

Speaker 1 there's a good chance that both teams get back to the Super Bowl night. Well, yeah, I don't see it as that way.

Speaker 1 The AFC championship game was that because it was more of an old school run style with the Titans. The 49ers are not like, that's not old school.

Speaker 1 That's not Kyle Shanahan being like, we're going to run the ball because passing is too risky. He's running the ball because he schemes up great run plays.
So I don't see that as an old school

Speaker 1 smash mouth football. They're just exceptional at running the football.
Jimmy G, though,

Speaker 1 he had the chance. That pass to Emmanuel Sanders.
Emmanuel Sanders was open with like a minute and 50 left. They're down four, and they throw the deep bomb.
He was there. He hits that pass.

Speaker 1 We're talking about a completely different game. We're talking about Jimmy Garoppolo probably being Super Bowl MVP.

Speaker 1 Instead, we're sitting here, Patrick Mahomes, rightfully so, best quarterback in the NFL, MVP. And we forgot to mention, playoff Damien.
Playoff Damien. As everyone calls him.

Speaker 1 Everyone calls him playoff Damien. Playoff Damien, he ended up with 104 yards, a touchdown, and he had 29 additional yards and touchdown in the passing game.

Speaker 1 You cannot discount playoff Damien. I was shocked that he didn't get the MVP just on reputation alone.
I love the Joe Bucks.

Speaker 1 As they call him, Playoff Damien. Who the hell calls him playoff Damien? It's a terrible nickname.
It should be either Playoff D or big game Dame. Right.
But now I'm

Speaker 1 now all in on playoffs. So bad, it's good.

Speaker 1 We should make a shirt that says just playoff off Damien, period, dash Joe Buff. Playoff Damien.

Speaker 1 That's his legendary. That's his sign-off call for this game.
I'm so happy for Andy Reid. I mean, he was already a Hall of Famer, but this really cements it.
He's going in as a chief, I would imagine.

Speaker 1 Probably going in as a chief. And all the losses, all the jokes, which, again,

Speaker 1 that one play in the fourth quarter, Patrick Mahomes making that pass. Before that play, there were definitely some shades of the Donovan McNabb drive where it was a little earlier in this game.

Speaker 1 You know, there were seven minutes left, but they had no pace. They had no urgency.

Speaker 1 And then that play changes everything. And Andy Reid is now considered, rightfully so, one of the best coaches in NFL history and has the championship to show for it.

Speaker 1 And they'll probably be back in the discussion next year. I mean, this is a team that's built for a long time.
Both these teams.

Speaker 1 Well, we don't know because Sammy Watkins might just chill out for a second. It's true.
And Patrick Mahomes has to get paid so much money. He has to get so much money.

Speaker 1 Patrick Mahomes should get paid what Dak's agent was fakely putting out there as his offer. So I think that's what I think.
They can actually pay him this year.

Speaker 1 I think it's like March this year is when they can officially pay him, and it's going to be insane. Was it $45? $40 million a year? I don't know.
I have no idea.

Speaker 1 I mean, Russ is number one right now at 32.

Speaker 1 So it's got to be at least 35. I'd say probably around 40.

Speaker 1 I don't know how much more you can pay, but. Shitload of catch-up.
Yeah,

Speaker 1 he deserves everything.

Speaker 1 absolutely he's unbelievable watches max kellerman said he's the greatest quarterback to ever live no he's the greatest football player to ever live period that's what max kellerman said what is ron jaworski saying about it i know that because our boss dave portnoy was had that clip ready to go when he thought the niners were going to win this is why this is why espn has fallen off so far in the last like two and a quarter years just coincidentally in that time frame yeah uh no particular event happened two and a quarter years ago but it used to be that if ron jaworski said something like that, they'd get a week's worth of content out of discussing it and then having people invite him on their other shows to debate him and all that.

Speaker 1 Max Kellerman said it, and it was like: if a tree falls in the forest and makes a shithead take and no one's around to discuss it, did it ever even happen? Right, exactly.

Speaker 1 So, Patrick Mahomes, I mean, who knows? He could end up with six, seven rings by the end of his career if he stays as healthy as that. Ten rings?

Speaker 1 I think what we're seeing is

Speaker 1 we're going to get someone who says something like

Speaker 1 that. No, over under eight rings for Patrick Mahomes.
Put this on a quote board right now because I truly believe this.

Speaker 1 I truly believe that Patrick Mahomes is going to end up being the first quarterback to have double-digit Super Bowl titles and MVPs. Whoa.
Ten.

Speaker 1 Now I want to get invited on every single other barstool platform for the rest of the week to discuss this. He's 24.
Hey, you know, he's a young 24, too.

Speaker 1 He's as many Super Bowl rings as Aaron Rodgers. Yeah.
Interesting.

Speaker 1 And he's better friends with his brother than Aaron Rodgers is with his. Right now, We know that the ties that bind are closer.
He's a more loyal guy.

Speaker 1 Fire TikToks are coming out. What happens with Jimmy G? So Jimmy G is going to definitely get a lot of criticism after this game.
This playoff run, he wasn't asked to pass a lot in their wins.

Speaker 1 He was asked to pass a lot tonight. He threw a couple interceptions.
He misses Emmanuel Sanders.

Speaker 1 He misses George Kittle on an easy first down that kind of stalled that drive that would have put them up even more. I still think he is, especially with the structure of this team.

Speaker 1 I mean, you just got to a Super Bowl with him.

Speaker 1 The haters will come out and say that when the game is on the line and you need the quarterback to make those big throws, he's not going to be there for you.

Speaker 1 So, do you, if you're John Lynch, I think they can actually walk away from almost all his money after this year. Do you.
This offseason? Yes, this offseason. The way his deal is structured.

Speaker 1 Do you bring Tom Brady home for two years,

Speaker 1 Hank?

Speaker 1 I mean, if you could, that would probably be.

Speaker 1 You thought I was going to go the Hulu ad. You thought I was going to talk about the Hulu ad and Tom Brady's picture.
Or like

Speaker 1 Tua or something. Yeah, I did a Hezzy Hey on you.
Let's bring it up that way. I mean, if he could, that'd be great.
Good grid for the 49ers. I don't think it's going to happen, though.

Speaker 1 Yeah, so yeah, it probably won't.

Speaker 1 Do they try to make a swap with Kirk Cousins and just say, like, hey, that is who Kyle Shinhan wants? It's who he wanted originally. Make a swap.
Be like, hey, both these guys make a lot of money.

Speaker 1 It's not working out as well as we had hoped, maybe.

Speaker 1 I just want to say for the record, I do like Nick Mullin or Nick Mullins. Which one's the guy on Come Town and which one's the guy that plays quarterback? Nick Mullins as the quarterback.

Speaker 1 But we saw him last year. I thought he was pretty good.
He was okay. He was okay.
Jimmy G's okay. Yeah, yeah.
Jimmy G was a little better than okay for most of the year.

Speaker 1 So you're already going to the backup. No, I'm just saying, like,

Speaker 1 I like Nick Mullins. You're just going to

Speaker 1 throw him out, go to the backup. Here's my evaluation of Nick Mullins.

Speaker 1 I went into a Thursday night football game being like, oh, this game might suck because it was Nick Mullins against another backup. And then Nick Mullins looked cool.

Speaker 1 And then Brett Favre called him on the phone after the game. True.
And I was like, okay, I like this guy's game. I like him too.

Speaker 1 I just don't know if it would be like, hey, here's the keys to the whole thing. Blow it all up.
Yeah. Blow the entire thing.

Speaker 1 Take this thing and go.

Speaker 1 I honestly think that both these teams could very well be back in the Super Bowl next year. Yeah, but Kyle Shannon, like you said,

Speaker 1 he's an unbelievable coach, and

Speaker 1 he's, you know, what he does with this team is fantastic, but this is how sports work. You lose the Super Bowl, you lose two Super Bowls in a row, and he wasn't the head coach, but the Falcons' 28-3

Speaker 1 panic was partially due to him. He starts to get that.
This is just how it works. Andy Reid has had this for 20 years.
Now, it's the passing of the torch for the big-time choker. Kyle Adams.

Speaker 1 Do you think it's a little unfair that he was just a coordinator for the first game? A little unfair. People are being like, this is combined.

Speaker 1 He would lost both of them, but only one of them, he was the head coach.

Speaker 1 He was being too aggressive with the play calls in that Falcons one, and you knew that it wasn't Dan Quinn that was overriding because Dan Quinn would have kicked that field goal on first down instead of trying to get any more yards.

Speaker 1 So I think he kind of gets that because he was very clearly the offensive guy there where Dan Quinn was in charge of the defense, and now he's obviously still calling offensive plays here.

Speaker 1 So they do have a, so his 20, Jimmy Garoppolo's 2020 contract becomes fully guaranteed on April 1st, but they have an hour out before that.

Speaker 1 That almost seems like it could be a psych date, too, since it's April Fool's Day. Yeah.

Speaker 1 No, this is crazy, though, because it's his, if you look at his contract, the 2020 salary was guaranteed for injury. He's healthy right now.

Speaker 1 So they have essentially can, if they want to, which would be a wild, wild move, a guy who you just went to the Super Bowl with, but they can theoretically walk away from him before April 1st.

Speaker 1 I wouldn't say they should. I don't think they should.
No, I don't think they should. But that is going to be a discussion for the next two months, so get ready for it.
Let's continue to have it.

Speaker 1 I'm not taking anything off the table, Jimmy.

Speaker 1 Maybe a trade straight up, Jimmy G for playoff Damien. I don't know about that.

Speaker 1 You got to keep playoff Damien for those four games in January. Playoff Damien.
What a beast. Mr.
January, right there.

Speaker 1 What a beast. I'm big big Aquarius.
So,

Speaker 1 real quick, it's time I think we should have a discussion about Kyle Shanahan. Just the name Kyle.
Is that too chill of a name? Not a great name.

Speaker 1 Too chill of a name to have that real cutthroat mentality. Maybe he needs to reach his natural destination of being a Kyle who just bangs monsters all the time.
Yeah. Or a Kyler.
Kyler.

Speaker 1 Yeah, he could be a Kyler. A Kyler would be the better.
Yeah, if he just, if he got into riding BMX bikes and banging monsters,

Speaker 1 rail grinds. Yeah, exactly.

Speaker 1 Kyle is way too chill out of a name.

Speaker 1 And Andy, on the other side of the name coin, is just like your best friend. Yeah.
I've never met a shithead. There's Andy.
Yeah, it's true. It's very true.

Speaker 1 So other parts of the game, other things we can discuss. Fox deciding to just go with an entirely new graphics package, which I didn't mind it.
And the Super Bowl. I didn't mind it.

Speaker 1 The cartoons were foolish and silly. That is a Super Bowl.
This is a man's game. It is.
No,

Speaker 1 you know that that you'll look back. Like, if they replay that game in five years and they show those cartoons after each touchdown, you'll be like, what were they thinking? Right.

Speaker 1 It did look almost like a little bit of the who's the guy that draws the boondocks. That guy.
They might have used that guy. Yes.

Speaker 1 But I didn't mind the graphics package overall besides the animation stuff.

Speaker 1 The only thing I didn't like, it was tough to find the timeouts. The Super Bowl.
You timeouts. You do that.
Transports were hard to find. I don't like change.

Speaker 1 That's probably why Andy Reid only burned two of them throughout the entire game is because he couldn't find them either. And then on the field, the yellow line.
We need to talk about that.

Speaker 1 Oh, my God.

Speaker 1 The nightmare. It was an absolute disaster in the second half.
There were like five plays in a row where the yellow line was off by a yard. And it really threw me off.
Comically off.

Speaker 1 I didn't know what was going on. Was I watching a football game? There was no green zone to tell me where it should be.
Yeah. So otherwise, it was a good broadcast.

Speaker 1 The halftime show was erotic.

Speaker 1 I would say there was a lot of like seven and eight and nine-year-old kids who realized some things watching the Tookases bounce around. That was quite a halftime show.

Speaker 1 Very Miami, but quite a halftime show. I think Butts are officially back.
No Pitbull. No Pitbull.

Speaker 1 No Pitbull. Pit Bull right now is putting together a hit list.

Speaker 1 Not like a playlist of all his great songs, but actually like a list of people that need to be killed for not inviting him to that halftime show. In his own city,

Speaker 1 he did the weird concert outside the stadium where a bunch of people who can't go to the game stand there and be like, why am I watching a pit bull concert at 3 o'clock in the afternoon? He did that.

Speaker 1 So who is the new Mr. 305? I don't know.
Who is the king of Miami? Except the Imagine Dragon show, basically. Yeah,

Speaker 1 is it DJ Khaled? Because at least he was in a commercial. Jay Butt?

Speaker 1 Jay Butt might be the new Mr. 30.
He's the new 305, because that's

Speaker 1 number player in terms of rankings in the NBA that he is right now. Okay.
Marlinsman? No, Marlinsman didn't even go to the game. Well, that's his city.
Yeah, they they weren't going to show him on TV.

Speaker 1 He had to feed his cats. They don't.
He loves Kansas City. He'll be at the parade.

Speaker 1 We also had for halftime show horniest guy, Michael Wilbon. Disagree.
What did Michael Wilbon say? He said, best halftime show ever by far, and I'm a Prince fanatic, but this is unequaled lordy.

Speaker 1 The lordy is, I got my pants out.

Speaker 1 I got my pants off, and I'm cranking it right now. That lordy, that lordy means shit.
Like, Michael Wilbon was undressed when J-Lo started bouncing her booty around. That is great.
I can't wait.

Speaker 1 I can't wait for Michael Wilbon to describe the halftime show to Tony Kornheiser tomorrow, who definitely didn't stay up to see it.

Speaker 1 But he's going to be like, Tony, their butts were all out there. It was incredible.
First, one of them did a shake, then the other one did a shake. It was awesome.
Okay, so fair enough.

Speaker 1 Actually, Saquon, what you just heard, that was part of the interruption. So

Speaker 1 you're listening to the right show.

Speaker 1 Jeb Bush is,

Speaker 1 I guess he had a very horny halftime take, too. He said, best Super Bowl halftime show ever, period.
And sometimes less is more when it comes to describing that because, like, you know,

Speaker 1 he can't be like... That was a left-handed type thing.
Left-handed type. He can't be like, look at, you know what I said to the booty cheeks? Please clap.

Speaker 1 He has to play it cool. He's got a family that's watching this stuff.
He can't say, Lordy. It's funny watching the older guys because I'm not going to say they don't know what porn is.

Speaker 1 I'm going to say they probably don't watch porn anymore because they like ruined too many computers and phones. Yeah.
Like the James Brown. Yeah.
James Brown watched that.

Speaker 1 I was going to say like Dean Norris just accidentally tweeting sex gifts

Speaker 1 instead of doing a tweet search for it. Yeah, James Brown watched that and was like, holy shit, I might have to get back on my bullshit.
What was the James? Okay, I got it.

Speaker 1 Sexy little brunette bitch sucking and fucking her personal trainer's big cock. That was James Brown's tweet.

Speaker 1 James Brown's tweet Hall of Fame in 2017. But that's, Mike Woban was watching that and just being like, lordy, he probably rewound it, told everyone to leave the room.
Lordy. The lordy is excessive.

Speaker 1 That's an excessive lordy. The lordy means things.
Can he name drop anything about that halftime show, though? He can't.

Speaker 1 Booty. It'd be great for him if he has at some point met J-Lo.
Yeah. So he'd be like, when I met J-Lo, she was good looking, but I didn't know she had all that.
Right. Lordy.

Speaker 1 He'd probably be like, I haven't seen a booty like that since Charles Barkley grabbed 25 rebounds in 1995. Some bullshit like that.
Lordy.

Speaker 1 I haven't seen a booty like that since Janet Jackson came to my birthday party. Lordy.
Lordy. Lordy.

Speaker 1 But no, you're right, because what we are seeing is older guys getting slightly better at being horny online

Speaker 1 and not knowing when to say when. Right.
So this new generation,

Speaker 1 you're making it harder on us content creators to harvest your mistakes, your horny mistakes, for jokes. So I appreciate that.

Speaker 1 All right, Super Bowl commercials. We had Google try to make us feel better about the fact that they've remembered everything we've said for years and years and years.

Speaker 1 Was that at Alzheimer's? The woman had Alzheimer's.

Speaker 1 They were basically doing the notebook, but instead of her husband writing to her every day, it was just like Google remembers all the shit that you said for your entire life. And everyone was...

Speaker 1 Isn't that romantic? Right, everyone was like, oh my God, that's so sad and crying.

Speaker 1 But then, probably because our brains have been ruined by the internet, we just sat there making jokes like, yeah, so they clearly have like all of her nudes, too. Oh, but yeah, what was her name?

Speaker 1 Loretta? Yeah, I guess it's a real story. So they really went over the top.
Now I feel like

Speaker 1 they've stolen everything from us. They've stolen our faces.
Like, I get the thought process here, and it actually is nice for anyone who might have Alzheimer's or dementia to have that.

Speaker 1 But that doesn't really, like helping out some senior citizens remember, have some memories in your machines doesn't erase the fact that you also have everything we've ever purchased and everything, every conversation we've ever had and our identities, and you've sold it all to like tracking websites in China.

Speaker 1 Right. You know what else like memorizes every single thing about someone would be a pencil and a paper.
Ooh, just writing it down.

Speaker 1 That would also do it. Oh,

Speaker 1 yes. For life.
For life. It is funny that we're thinking of.
I actually have the voice right now, Florida. We're thinking.
Old school OS for life. How sweet is it?

Speaker 1 We look at a computer being nice, and it makes us feel nice and romantic inside. We're like, oh, my God, the machines.
That artificial intelligence, that is a real panty dropper.

Speaker 1 Machines really did it.

Speaker 1 University of Wisconsin saved dogs, no big deal. Yeah, so we did make it to the big time.
And then the only other ones I remember is the Bill Murray.

Speaker 1 That came out earlier in the day. I don't hate Bill Murray.
No, you hate him. I actually thought you were.
You hate him. You hate Drake.
On it.

Speaker 1 No, I don't hate Bill Murray at all.

Speaker 1 I hate the Bill Murray Industrial Complex, where every time Bill Murray does something, it's like, this is funny. Click on this article about Bill Murray stealing an old.
He really hated this ad.

Speaker 1 Bill Murray stole an old lady's purse on the streets of Charleston, South Carolina. Classic gag.
Yep. So you hated this ad? No, I didn't mind this one because the Groundhog was pretty cute.
Right.

Speaker 1 That fat bitch.

Speaker 1 We got early speaker baby. Yeah, early spring little baby.
You think that was rude of me to call him a fat little bitch? Yeah.

Speaker 1 But he looked like a fat little bitch. I would not call anyone a fat bitch.
Well, he looked like a fat little bitch. He did.
But we got spring, baby. Yeah, spring's baby.
There you go, Phil.

Speaker 1 Andy Reid gets to put on his shorts six weeks early. Dude, how much food is he going to eat?

Speaker 1 Like, this is.

Speaker 1 I'm so excited to watch Andy Reid enjoy this. Does he even drink? I don't think he's going to be.
He doesn't drink.

Speaker 1 He converted to Mormonism for the Putantang. He did say after the game, he said he's going to celebrate by having a double cheeseburger.
Oh, yes, so that's Andy.

Speaker 1 It's great because this is a classic fat guy move where it's like, well, I'm not drinking, so I can eat double.

Speaker 1 Like, I didn't have a beer. He's been like that his whole life.
Right, but this is double, double. You know what? He's going to do a shitload of shots of milk.

Speaker 1 Did you see that story about how much he loves milk? Oh, yeah. So, Andy Reid.
Throwback story. Yeah, throwback story back in the day.

Speaker 1 Packer coach likes his milk. It was the headline.

Speaker 1 This is classic Wisconsin news.

Speaker 1 Showing his strength in farming contests, Green Bay Packer assistant coach Andy Reid won the milk drinking competition Saturday at June Dairy Day after downing 29 double shots of milk.

Speaker 1 Second place was a Wisconsin Rapids radio announcer who had 27.

Speaker 1 So yeah, shout out to Andy Reid, legendary milk drinker. He also, they used to do...

Speaker 1 They used to do some sort of fundraiser for, I think it was BYU back in the day, where they would send their coaches out to sell hot dogs.

Speaker 1 And whoever was the best hot dog salesman ended up getting like a little prize, a little bonus. It was a fundraiser for the university, for the football team.

Speaker 1 And Andy Reid would always dominate in the sales, of course. But nobody ever thought, like, hey, maybe Andy's just like buying eating them all, buying hot dogs, yeah, just saving them all.

Speaker 1 Oh, shit, time to pay the fiddler. Shout out to Aaron Boone, by the way.
He predicted the exact score before the game. That's kind of impressive.
He said it's six o'clock.

Speaker 1 For what it's worth, I'm going with Chiefs 31-20.

Speaker 1 So that's a win for the Yankees. Definitely.
So pinstripe. He gets one pinstripe.
One pinstripe for correctly pinstructing. Actually,

Speaker 1 should Andy Reid get pinstripes for that for coming through for his management?

Speaker 1 They be very, very slimming. I like that.
So who won the Super Bowl ads? I'm just going to Google that and I'll tell you who won it.

Speaker 1 It doesn't even feel

Speaker 1 Super Bowl ads aren't real anymore. Like, they're not, the commercials don't matter as much because you watch them all.

Speaker 1 You watch them all beforehand. The Tom Brady one, do you want to mention that one? You called that, Hank?

Speaker 1 That was going to be my Who's Back of the Week, but Tom Brady is back.

Speaker 1 Not only, as we said on the show, was that picture an advertisement for Hulu, he said he's not going anywhere in the advertisement, and then a report came out today that the Patriots are willing to pay him $30 million a year.

Speaker 1 Which would make him the second, well, besides Patrick Mahomes and Patrick McConnell, the third highest quarterback.

Speaker 1 And he basically just told me he told them that he just wanted them to go get more receivers, which I don't see why they won't do that. He'd rather they spend the money on weapons.

Speaker 1 I feel good about, yeah, he would. I feel good about Brady coming back.

Speaker 1 So instead of buying shady apartments for your players who already have weapons, he just wants them to go out and buy the weapons. Bottom?

Speaker 1 Cut out the middle. That was like 2.75 breasts.
That wasn't even a pun. Well, it was, but it was a word punch.
It was just an indictment

Speaker 1 of the front office.

Speaker 1 Riley would tweet something along those lines. How dumb would Antonio Brown feel after getting himself cut from the Raiders and then Tom Brady goes and plays on the Raiders? Ooh.

Speaker 1 Yeah, that would be pretty stupid. Actually, I don't think he ever feels dumb.
I think he's

Speaker 1 pretty highly of himself. He's the best.

Speaker 1 He tweeted, did you see the Instagram post where it was just a, I think it was the holiday party for the Miami-Dade police department and just said, I'm sorry for offending any of you.

Speaker 1 Look, so he's on the back.

Speaker 1 He's back. I actually do hope that he's getting better because, like, as we've said for the last year now,

Speaker 1 he's been pretty fucking. He's Cray Cray.
He's Cray Cray. He's Cray Cray.

Speaker 1 We saw Jeff Darlington last week, by the way. Yeah.
At the Super Bowl. Sitting close to him.

Speaker 1 I wanted to sit at a table right next to him. I was like, hey, you want to have a seat? You want to have a seat and touch knees? I thought that was funny.

Speaker 1 All right, before we get to our who's back, anything else on the Super Bowl?

Speaker 1 Let's see. Orange, Orange Gatorade.
Orange Gatorade.

Speaker 1 That was a big, big surprise. Plot twist at the end.
That might have just been sun-kissed, though.

Speaker 1 Yeah, for sure. He probably had his own.
For Andy, or just straight-up orange juice. I could see him doing that.
Or just liquefied Cheetos dust. Yeah, so

Speaker 1 the purple smoke was, well, it was supposed to be the 49ers, but then there was the rumor that it was for Kobe as well. Didn't happen.

Speaker 1 Any other... Oh, the Patrick Mahomes rushing bet.
So that was the biggest loss.

Speaker 1 If you had the over 35 and a half yards, at the end, he was taking knees, but he was going further than just one yard back. Yeah, he was trying to milk the clock a little bit.

Speaker 1 Right, so he ended up with, I think, 30 rushing yards. He lost 15 rushing yards.
Oh, my God. 3 on niels, and the over-under was 35.5.
He finished with 29. Oh, my God.

Speaker 1 So we we could have just taken normal knees, and he would have been fine.

Speaker 1 And normally, I would say that doesn't really count as a bad beat because it's such a random prop, but the Super Bowl is just random props. Everyone bets random props.
So that is a bad beat.

Speaker 1 Other big news: Tails never fails. Ever told you that last year? Ever, five years in a row.
Dynasty.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Should we start talking about a dynasty for Tails? I think we do.
I mean, that's significant.

Speaker 1 They should put Tails in the Hall of Fame. Heads has no defense for Tails.
Huge night for Tails, including Shakira and Jayla. Ooh, Lordy.

Speaker 1 lordy lordy lordy shaking it hips don't lie lordy uh that is lordy is the horniest way to say i'm so so erect right now as a 50 60 year old man when you say lordy you're definitely wiping sweat off your brow with the handkerchief with a handkerchief out of your suit that like a nice one yeah and it might matches your tie that's your cum rag that you're also wiping your handkerchief with

Speaker 1 lordy's pretty bad i'd say the number one way of just showing horniness is still like doing the howling like a wolf and scratching your foot on the ground thing.

Speaker 1 Grunting. Yeah, that's going to be tough.

Speaker 1 Okay,

Speaker 1 no, there was something else I was going to talk about in this game. There was

Speaker 1 Terry Bradshaw forgot how to talk for a second. Well,

Speaker 1 that's normal. Yeah, that's pretty normal.
Should we have the debate whether or not Patrick Mahomes is the face of the NFL?

Speaker 1 He already said it's Lamar Jackson. Yeah, but I mean, it's Mahomes.
It is 100% Mahomes. He's the voice of the NFL.
He's everything of the NFL. He is the guy.

Speaker 1 I mean, Max Kellerman already said, the greatest football player to ever live.

Speaker 1 Honestly, if he ends his career with only one Super Bowl MVP, he'd be Aaron Rodgers. Fraud.

Speaker 1 Fraud.

Speaker 1 I'm putting him on a fraud watch right now. You mean Aaron Rodgers is a fraud? Right now,

Speaker 1 right now, Patrick Mahomes is still a fraud. He needs to get to at least seven until I take him off my F-word list.
Yeah, so he's going to, he'll be back there many, many, many times. 24.

Speaker 1 Could you imagine being a Chiefs fan right now now this is me just hurting myself thinking about what the bears could have had could you imagine being a chiefs fan right now and saying we get this yeah for the next 15 years i don't know if you've noticed this but anytime a quarterback is good as a rookie you automatically hear the fan base and the media jump to the assumption that that player is going to be there for 10 to 15 years he will be that's like that's like the minimum that we're giving right now and if you can show me like three quarterbacks in the nfl that have been great for between 10 and 15 years over the last like 20 years.

Speaker 1 I mean, Tom Brady, Tom Brady, Peyton Manning. Aaron Rodgers, Peyton Manning.
How long was Peyton Manning on the Colts for? Was it like 12? Yeah. Okay.
Russell will get there.

Speaker 1 Russell Wilson will probably make year eight right now. So it'll be, I mean, that's still seven

Speaker 1 to seven years. No, of course, it's not everyone, but this, I would feel confident.
I mean, you already said double digits. Double digits.
Minimum, yeah.

Speaker 1 Maybe triple digits. Minimum.
Minimum.

Speaker 1 So the real question then becomes: how quickly does it take us to start hating Chiefs fans? It's got to be soon. I don't know.
I don't know. It happens in all sports, every single sport.

Speaker 1 If you win a championship

Speaker 1 and your guy's awesome, Andy Reed

Speaker 1 is like protecting them

Speaker 1 from being hatable. I think that what's first going to happen,

Speaker 1 if I'm understanding the avenues of hatred correctly, is the first person you'll start to dislike is probably Travis Kelsey. Well, Tyreek Hill seems like a

Speaker 1 good call. Like a normal spot

Speaker 1 to be a little bit more than a half. Good call.

Speaker 1 Travis Kelsey will also say something hilarious that will rub some people the wrong way.

Speaker 1 Besides that, they're a very likable team. Oh, of course, but come on.
That doesn't matter. People like the Warriors.
They did. This happens in all sports.

Speaker 1 If you're good for a long period of time, everyone will hate you at the end. I think if they win three consecutive Super Bowls.
Everyone will hate them.

Speaker 1 A lot of people will start to be sick of them. Although,

Speaker 1 if they win three consecutive Super Bowls, that would mean that they would beat the Patriots most likely in the playoffs for the next two years.

Speaker 1 And I think that so many people are so sick of the Patriots that that would actually diffuse some of the hate towards the battlefield. I'm just saying, get ready.

Speaker 1 I don't know when it's going to happen, but it will eventually happen. And again, Hank, that's not, I'm not attacking the Patriots.
No, that's not the thing.

Speaker 1 I'm saying that's how great the Patriots have been. Yeah.
Okay, before we get to who's back of the week.

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Speaker 1 Okay, who's back of the week, Hank?

Speaker 1 I had Tom Tom Brady, but my other who's back is win probability charts. Ooh, yes.

Speaker 1 Oh, laid on me. The Kyle Shanahan now, he has the two worst ones, but they're putting them side by side.
Yeah, the old man World Comp stock.

Speaker 1 I think the 49ers were 93%, and then just dropped, and the Falcons were like 97%. Damn.
I'm shocked that the Falcons were only 97%. Well, it was in the third quarter.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 Damn, that sucks. Kyle Shanahan.
Damn. I want to be the first to say that I'm going to resist the Kyle Shanahan isn't clutch movement.
I'm going to be the first to say that I will

Speaker 1 raise

Speaker 1 the Kyle Shanahan is a choker movement. Is what? A choker.
Is it choker? Is it okay? Well, we will have

Speaker 1 chokers. He might just not have the clutch gene.
Chokers are bad. Choker's different from.

Speaker 1 It's tough to choke as a head coach.

Speaker 1 But he did it twice. 96 points.

Speaker 1 One and a half times. One and a half times.
One and a half times.

Speaker 1 He's still a great head coach, but you can't say if he gets the Super Bowl next year, you don't think that will be the number one storyline? Because it will be. Will he choke again? Yes, absolutely.

Speaker 1 That's how sports works. It's tough to choke twice, but it is.
Epstein did it.

Speaker 1 He did. Yeah, I know.
Remember? Yes.

Speaker 1 Kyle said he felt good that it was tied at 10.10.

Speaker 1 I think Epstein did too. I think he died at 10.20.

Speaker 1 So there you go. All right, PFT, your who's back.
My who's back is USA Rugby. Okay.

Speaker 1 USA Rugby is back. We finished in third place this weekend in the sevenths tournament in Sydney.

Speaker 1 Almost made to the finals. We had the ball at the final horn.
It was tough, unfortunate knock-on call.

Speaker 1 But yeah, it was good to see the boys get back onto the podium. We came in third place because

Speaker 1 we beat the fuck out of England in the bronze medal game. Okay, nice.
So yeah, we're back big time. I think this is going to actually be the start of something great.

Speaker 1 You think this is the moment that it all... I think this is when we go on our run.
Great. I think so.
We've been day one fans. Day one USA Rugby.
Day one fans.

Speaker 1 My other who's back of the week is the NFL rigging things. Okay.
Did you notice what happened on the coin flip today? Yes. Obviously, tails happened.
Yep. And then there was a defer call.

Speaker 1 And then was it the Niners that said, okay, we'll kick the ball?

Speaker 1 The Chiefs. Chiefs said, okay, we'll kick the ball.
And then the ref had to explain, wait, that means that you're going to kick off for both halves. And he was like, no, no, we don't want to do that.

Speaker 1 We want to go ahead and we'll receive the ball then. So the NFL stepped in.

Speaker 1 I don't know if Sky Judge got in the ear or Mike Pereira got in the ear of the official on the field and told them what to do. But

Speaker 1 if you were a Niners fan, you could say that maybe the game changed on this. You got absolutely screwed.
Maybe it's under protest. Absolutely screwed.
I agree with that.

Speaker 1 Okay, my who's back of the week. I got two as well.
The first is animals making picks. I should have fucking followed Fiona the hippo, who puked on on the Chiefs logo.

Speaker 1 I didn't know what it meant at the time. Clearly it was take the Chiefs because of Kyle Shannon's a choker.
Right, so I think the same person texted you that has texted me,

Speaker 1 and they said, hey, it was tweeted.

Speaker 1 It was public.

Speaker 1 But the first I saw was when I got as a text. My initial reaction was, I think that means that a hippo picked the Chiefs.
No, he did. Yeah, I think

Speaker 1 she did.

Speaker 1 She threw up on the Chiefs logo, and I saw a bunch of people saying, this obviously means the Niners. I I was like, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
So,

Speaker 1 yeah, I think that's a good idea. A lot of animals throw up on things before they eat them again.
I fucked that up. God damn it.
And then my other who's back is Danny Boycain.

Speaker 1 So during the halftime show, Danny Boycain, who, if you don't know who he is, he has one of the most legendary press conferences, videos on the internet. Obviously, a huge Miami Hurricanes fan.

Speaker 1 Now, I heard that he might have the coronavirus. Nope, not true.
Not true. That's actually probably why he went private, but not true.

Speaker 1 He does not have the coronavirus, never had the swine flu, never attacked by a bear. At halftime,

Speaker 1 everyone else is looking at the booties going, Lordy, he says this halftime show is a perfect thing to show recruits what Miami is all about.

Speaker 1 So he's thinking about class of 2021 recruits while everyone else is enjoying the booties.

Speaker 1 And that, my friends, is why Danny Boycain is the king and why every time there's a coaching search at Miami, his name gets rumored to possibly be a candidate.

Speaker 1 Well, this is also a big win for the U because

Speaker 1 technically this game was played at their stadium. Right.
Miami football tweeted out like it's great to see the Super Bowl happening in our house that they run out from the Dolphins.

Speaker 1 That's recruits, though. Yeah.
That equals recruits. Recruits see that night game at Hard Rock Cafe Stadium in Miami Gardens, and they think the U might be back.

Speaker 1 And wait, didn't the U get who did they get recently?

Speaker 1 No idea.

Speaker 1 Deion Sanders.

Speaker 1 FSU. Who was it? Who was it? Hank, who was it? The U got something that made him back.

Speaker 1 And this really makes him back. Ed Reed, sorry.
Ed Reed. Ed Reid, yes, he's their chief of staff.
Yes. He'll go into the living room and show his Super Bowl ring.
Yes.

Speaker 1 He went to.

Speaker 1 He went to. No.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 Flacco? Was he on the 2000. Wait, was he?

Speaker 1 No, I don't think think so. That might have been too early for him.

Speaker 4 Let's see.

Speaker 1 Damn.

Speaker 1 No, he definitely won both. Is he a rookie? This is the part of, part of my take.
Well, I mean, it's the end of the season. The football season ends.
It's the end of the season.

Speaker 1 His brain stopped working. Yes.
He did. He got both.
He was a rookie?

Speaker 1 Super Bowl champion. No, one Super Bowl.
Damn. One Super Bowl.
I was right. That sucks for Ed Reed.
So he can go in with one Super Bowl. I think.
And a Miami National Championship ring. Yep.

Speaker 1 So there you go. That's what he does.
Either way, the U's back. Danny Boycain's got them covered.
PFT, you want to do the ads real quick, and then we're going to finish the show with Gardner Minshew.

Speaker 1 By the way, we did a bunch of interviews in Miami. We got some great ones coming up.
We got some ones that are non-football as well. So get excited.

Speaker 1 Some big-name guests coming up to a show new you soon. I'm surprised you didn't say who's back XFL.
You seemed really into the XFL. Well, we have all week to do that.
That's true.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I will give you my honest assessment of the the XFL once I watch the games. I will like the AAF.
Tell you what, here's what we'll do on part of my take.

Speaker 1 We'll do a little good cop, bad cop for the XFL. You're not biased.
You're going to be honest. Yes.
I'm going to be biased. Okay.

Speaker 1 Because I feel like the more I talk it up, the better likelihood I have to get that phone call from Oliver Luck. Okay, got it.
So they're doing exactly what they wanted to do because

Speaker 1 you freely promote it. Because you're not going to do that.
No, but if I'm honestly like it, I'll tell you I like it. Yeah, there you go.
But if you think I'm not sure, I can be the one.

Speaker 1 I think AAF was the same thing. AAF last year.
First week, I was excited. And then after that, it fucking sucked.
And I didn't watch any of it because college basketball was on.

Speaker 1 One great way to make you like the XFL is if Mark Tressman just gets the shit kicked out of him every week. Perfect.
Absolutely. I like that.
What's up, guys?

Speaker 1 It's Big Cat here making my Irish entrance with proper number 12 Irish whiskey. How do you make an Irish entrance, you ask?

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Speaker 1 So get out there and make your Irish entrance. Anything else just wouldn't be proper.
Hey, what's going on there, pal? We saw you at the hockey game on. Do I know you guys? I'm Ryan Whitney.

Speaker 1 I got a drink named after you. Not a big deal.
Pink Whitney?

Speaker 1 That's what I thought. See you, fellas.
I invented the thing, you pigeon. Pink Whitney for legendary moments.

Speaker 1 Before we get to Gardner Minshew, Breaking Moose.

Speaker 1 Breaking Moose.

Speaker 1 Patrick Mahomes liked the tweet.

Speaker 1 All right, there it is.

Speaker 1 The run is complete. Thanks for coming out.
Thanks for coming out, Chiefs.

Speaker 1 I tweeted every single time they were down in this playoff run, and every single time Patrick Mahomes shoved it down my face and then won the game and liked it in the locker room after.

Speaker 1 So congrats to Patrick Mahomes. Recurring guest.
Hopefully we'll get him back on.

Speaker 1 But yeah, unbelievable run for them. Thanks for coming out, Chiefs.
$50 million man. I should make that a shirt.
Thanks for coming out, Chiefs. Yeah.
This ain't it, Chiefs.

Speaker 1 Thanks for coming out, Chiefs. Then all the scores, and they were down by double digits.
Three times, double digits. That's crazy.
That's crazy.

Speaker 1 Do you think anyone would buy a shirt if it was just your three tweets with the Patrick Mahomes two liked above it? Right. And the score, though, of when I tweeted it would be good.
Yeah. Yeah.

Speaker 1 This one I think I did like right after their punt. Right after the opening drive.
Yeah. Yeah.

Speaker 1 All right. Okay.

Speaker 1 Love you guys. I love you guys.
Love you guys. Love you guys.
I love you guys. Here's Gardner Minshew.

Speaker 1 All right. We now welcome on recurring guests, already been on.
That's right.

Speaker 1 Gardner Minshew, starting quarterback for the Jacksonville Jaguars, and the hungriest man in the NFL, Snickers award winner. They have a new

Speaker 1 commercial coming out, Super Bowl. Also, you can find it on YouTube.
So my question is, what's the bigger award? Fifth in the Heisman or Snickers' Hungriest Man of the Year?

Speaker 4 Well, for Fifth and the Heisman, I didn't get a $75,000 chain, which I did get for this.

Speaker 4 So I guess just by the prize alone, you'd have to say the hungriest player is number one.

Speaker 1 Do they give you a replica that you can then put? Because I think it's going to charity, right?

Speaker 4 Yeah, so this is going to get auctioned off from November, which is a cause that I chose.

Speaker 4 It's just bringing awareness to men's health issues, mental health, something that I don't think gets talked about enough.

Speaker 4 So, yeah, it's for a good cause.

Speaker 1 So,

Speaker 1 we need to get a replica chain that you can like have, you can hang in your house. Yeah.
And it's like, here's Fifth and Heisman, here's Snickers.

Speaker 4 Yeah, I think this only like it's only like $75,000. So it's like, not a big deal.

Speaker 1 Not a big deal at all. Not a big deal.
What's the most expensive piece of jewelry you have?

Speaker 4 I got like a rubber band on right now.

Speaker 4 I got this from

Speaker 4 a ski boot that I was renting in Telluride.

Speaker 1 Right. Okay.
Wait, so you famously, though, are good with your money. You drive an old Acura, a beat-up Acura.
Not that on, I mean, not that beat up. Okay, well, it's a beat-up Acura.

Speaker 1 Which car are we talking about? 11. Okay.
11. You got a CD changer in there? Yeah.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 That's pretty boss. Did Ryan Pace ever see that car?

Speaker 4 I don't think so.

Speaker 1 Okay, because you probably would have been a Chicago Bear if you had eyes on that car. Probably so.
Because he likes guys with bad cars. That's kind of how his draft processes.

Speaker 1 Are you not going to buy a new car now that you've, you know, getting a little...

Speaker 4 Like, I don't think I need to. Like, I mean, it works.

Speaker 1 True. So I got it on.
Does it?

Speaker 1 Oh, it works. Okay.

Speaker 4 We get point A to point B. I had an RV for a month.
That was, you know.

Speaker 1 I rent that anytime I need it. You got the RV.
You drove it at what? You drove it like across I-10, across the country, basically?

Speaker 4 No, so we kind of took a crooked route.

Speaker 4 We went from Mississippi, went duck hunting in East Texas to Austin, Texas, worked out at Permian High School in Odessa, which was awesome where Friday Night Lights was.

Speaker 1 Those miles.

Speaker 4 Yeah, Telluride, Colorado, Las Vegas, Newport Beach, Scottsdale, Grand Canyon, home.

Speaker 1 That's pretty sweet. So did you, did you actually, were you in charge of emptying out the gray water tank on your RV? So that's what we had a rule.

Speaker 4 The first person to use the bathroom has to clean out the bathroom. So we just ended up not using it the whole time.

Speaker 1 That's actually the best rule. So we had an RV.
Right?

Speaker 4 And so we had a ton of like just trucker bombs. And yeah.

Speaker 1 Wait, so how many people did you go with?

Speaker 4 So it was two of my buddies, one from Washington State, and then one was my roommate in junior college. Okay.
So they were along for the ride.

Speaker 1 That's pretty sick. That's we've we've done some RV trips like long distance.
There's no better way to like travel around America. Oh, it is.

Speaker 4 It's so nice. We got to see so much in like two weeks.

Speaker 1 It was incredible. That's smart though, because when you do have to empty out that great water tank, that's a life-changing experience.

Speaker 1 I don't want to do that. You don't want to

Speaker 1 do it.

Speaker 1 You'll be seeing things for a while afterwards.

Speaker 1 Absolutely.

Speaker 1 All right. So you also found your first mustache.

Speaker 4 Yeah. Talk about that.
So that was,

Speaker 4 I grew that at East Carolina. Had to shave it just because it wasn't.
It didn't live up to the standard I wanted a mustache to be. So I had to shave it, but it was still sad.

Speaker 1 It was two weeks of a mustache. It was three weeks.
I thought you were going to say, like, oh, I thought I was going to get drafted by the Yankees.

Speaker 4 No, no, it was two weeks I had to shave it, but I loved it. And there was obviously a connection there.
Like, I knew,

Speaker 4 even then, I knew I was supposed to wear a mustache. So I shaved it off into a little Ziploc baggie and it's been on my bulletin board ever since.

Speaker 4 And then I found the bulletin board the other day and I was like, wow, this could really help somebody out.

Speaker 1 Yeah, so what are you going to do with that? Because I was thinking, I can't grow facial hair. It's a problem.
I'm facebald.

Speaker 1 But like one of my heroes in life is Joe Buck, and he spent a lot of time getting hair plugs. I don't know if they can do like mustache plugs.

Speaker 1 I don't know if I can use your hair and just like embed it. And maybe it'll seed my hair.

Speaker 4 If they can do that, you can have it.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 4 If you get approval for that, like if you can get that surgery done, then yes.

Speaker 1 That means you have to hold on to it until we have final.

Speaker 4 It's at home in a safe. I have one key.
There's two other people with keys. Looks like a nuclear submarine.

Speaker 1 It's just like a nuclear code.

Speaker 4 It's protected.

Speaker 1 Okay, I know what we can do. We'll find

Speaker 1 a doctor. Stall him out.
Yeah. Never get an answer.
Eventually, he's going to be like, we'll be 60 years old and be like, hey, can we just have it? And he'd be like, sure.

Speaker 1 Wait, what are y'all talking about over there? Nothing. No, nothing.
It's that far. Don't worry about it.
You can't hear it through that hair.

Speaker 1 Did Coach Marone ever say, like, hey, man, maybe get a haircut? Because Coach Marone, he is a Yankee fan. We've had him on many times.
Good friend of ours.

Speaker 1 He's kind of a straight, you know, buzz-cut type of guy. Has he ever taken a look at you and been like, come on, Gardner?

Speaker 4 Yeah, he usually has something to say.

Speaker 4 Like, you know, usually I'll wear my shades inside. He's like, oh, you know, what are your cool guys? Like, yeah, we're actually meeting today, all the cool guys.

Speaker 1 Right, right.

Speaker 1 You disgust him. I can tell.
He's like, oh, here we go again. 1969 in the software.

Speaker 4 As a Yankee guy, he has to respect the mustache. Yeah.
You know, know, because that's, I think, that's the only facial way that can grow. Yeah,

Speaker 4 I think he has a soft spot for the mustache.

Speaker 1 Okay. Yeah, you kind of got like Johnny Damon and a jam band vibes going on.
Yeah. I can see him like letting you pass.
What about Coughlin?

Speaker 1 Did Coughlin ever, did he look at you, walk past, and be like, get a job?

Speaker 4 See, I thought Coughlin was going to hate me, but he just likes a guy that'll kind of like... rib back and forth with him.
So we just kind of give each other crap and it was fun.

Speaker 1 Was that a whole weird situation?

Speaker 4 Not to get serious, but like, you know, Coughlin obviously getting fired with a couple weeks left in the the season was it was it weird in the locker room or were you guys like all right let's just finish this season out no it was definitely it was definitely different like he's the type of guy like you feel like when he's around like yeah he's such a presence um you know yeah like finding you and everything yeah you're kind of on your toes a little bit right right and then the clocks that was the first thing anybody said that's all the first day we're just like wow The clocks are back.

Speaker 1 Really?

Speaker 4 Seriously, that was like the biggest thing. It was a huge deal in the building.

Speaker 1 So you moved the clocks forward 15 minutes after he was gone, right?

Speaker 4 Just to normal time.

Speaker 1 To normal task phone time. You just be real people again.
Yeah, so that was... It's interesting.

Speaker 1 That probably fucked your head, though, because then you start showing, like, I would definitely show up early. Wait, no, you don't.
No, I would start showing up late. Like, did you get late?

Speaker 1 Did you notice that you'd walk into a meeting like a minute late after the clocks were into real time?

Speaker 4 Oh, no. I think, I mean, we're pretty much trained like, you know, Pavlovian dogs.
Like, we were there early.

Speaker 1 Even earlier than early. It worked.
It worked. I like that.

Speaker 1 I don't know if Big Cat shared this with you already, but the first time we had you on the show, you talked about how much you love football and how you took a hammer to your hand to try to get a little medical red shirt going on.

Speaker 1 Didn't work. You weren't able to execute.
That's close. That close.

Speaker 1 I actually thought that you were a fake. I thought that you were not the real Gardner Minshew after you told that story.
I was like, we're being duped by somebody because this story is too perfect.

Speaker 1 It embodies...

Speaker 1 the essence of what I think Gardner Minshew is, like to a T. So I thought someone was setting us up.
And then it was like, no, that's just really who he is.

Speaker 4 You know, I come on to your show, give you, I save this story for y'all.

Speaker 1 I knew one day.

Speaker 4 I appreciate it. I knew one day

Speaker 4 this is going to PMT.

Speaker 4 There's no better forum. And then you spit on my story, called me an imposter.

Speaker 1 No, no, no,

Speaker 1 Jackie, the highest compliment.

Speaker 1 And I was just like, after it was over, I was just like, this is too perfect. I don't know if we can run this.
Okay, and in PFT's defense, the party's leaving out.

Speaker 1 So this did for real happen to us one time, which is a great connection to you. We had Mike Leach on the show, and for some reason, it was back when we were in our old office.

Speaker 1 The radio lines got mixed up. So someone calling into radio just was put through to our show, and we interviewed a fake Mike Leach for like 15 minutes until we're like, wait, this isn't Mike Leach.

Speaker 1 So we're always like, since that moment, we've had like the like five minutes into an interview, we're like, wait, is this really who we think it is? So it's Mike Leach's fault.

Speaker 4 Yeah, no, it's a lot of things are his fault.

Speaker 1 What's the craziest Coach Leach story you have? Actually, do you have any stories that you've saved just for PMT this time around?

Speaker 4 Dude, I have one, but it involves a buddy, and he's not ready to come out with a story. Okay, I can wait.

Speaker 1 So one day.

Speaker 4 A code date? One day.

Speaker 1 Just say I did it.

Speaker 4 Yeah, no.

Speaker 1 So we can't do it.

Speaker 1 But no,

Speaker 4 I'm telling you, it's a great story.

Speaker 1 Yeah, it sounds awesome, dude. Yeah, no, I'm telling you.

Speaker 4 I cannot oversell. It's an incredible story.

Speaker 1 Awesome.

Speaker 1 I want to see USA Today write a report about this interview. Gardner Minshew tells part of my take.
He has great story. but not ready to share that

Speaker 1 i got a sick story but it's not ready it's not but just promise you save it for us yeah okay i got you so the coach leech story what's your best coach leech see the best one's like i can't tell like you know usually turn off the cameras yeah okay we're off

Speaker 4 um my thing like the best thing is just like day to day with leech like if he like locks you in like one-on-one he'll he'll start talking and he won't stop so like in our quarterback room we have a rule like he's sitting at the head of the table the screen's up there like if he starts telling a story everybody has to just turn and face the screen because if he locks in on somebody we're about to be 30 minutes late to practice you know so you just can't give him an audience just have to tune him out and then eventually he'll realize oh wait i'm not talking to anybody and we'll get back with them and we'll be good yeah so that's typically you know kind of pro leech handling is it weird he's going now to mississippi state your home your home state and do you think he's gonna you know be successful there no i think he'll do well i always thought like at mississippi state old mess you have to do something different right Because like you're not just going to line up and beat Alabama or LSU.

Speaker 4 Like you're just not going to have the talent there.

Speaker 4 So I think it's a good fit. I was actually just up there like last weekend hanging out with everybody.

Speaker 4 So it is it's weird for me. You know, both my sisters go there, which is right, which is awesome.

Speaker 1 Volleyball, right? That's right.

Speaker 4 You know, so I'll get to see them a good bit, which I'm, you know, pretty excited about. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Did he hit you up when he was taking the job to get advice about where to recruit down there or just like any of the local flavor?

Speaker 4 Yeah, no, we had a good talk. You know, he's all about, you know, what are the guys like? Are they tough?

Speaker 4 Are they, you know, because he thinks, you know, he's from Wyoming and he's a badass, so he wants other guys that are badasses like him.

Speaker 1 Right.

Speaker 4 So, yeah, no, I told you he loves the guys down there, a little more, you know, blue-collar type people.

Speaker 1 You got to teach him how to ring a cowbell. It's not going to be good.
It's bad. It's not going to be good.
It's bad. I haven't seen him.
Did he try to?

Speaker 1 Oh, when he did it off the plane, it was just like

Speaker 1 halftime in one of their basketball games. That's not going to be his thing.

Speaker 4 That's not going to be his thing. That's the thing, like, with him and Lane Kiffen, like, all the people are so crazy about that rivalry, but both of those dudes are just living in their own world.

Speaker 4 Oh, they're not invested in it.

Speaker 1 They're just gonna have

Speaker 4 a blast.

Speaker 1 The state of Mississippi is back. It's gonna be the best of opera in best football next year.

Speaker 1 You got Jay Gruden now. Yeah.
Jay Gruden, friend of the program.

Speaker 1 Have you asked him if you can pinch his nipples yet?

Speaker 4 No, that's actually like one of the first things. You know, like, can I get a playbook? Can I pinch your nipples?

Speaker 1 Right. Yeah, right.
That's what he lets his favorite players do. I don't know if you saw the clip of Deshaun Jackson in practice, just reaching over.
I'll demonstrate it.

Speaker 1 Oh, just like getting one of those, and he starts giggling. He's like, hee hee hee hee hee.
So just do a little tip. Just do it.
First day of practice.

Speaker 1 Don't make it weird. No.

Speaker 4 Just like that.

Speaker 4 It's casual.

Speaker 1 Yeah. I read somewhere that you're a fantasy football guru.

Speaker 4 I ended up losing in the league. How many drugs on your team?

Speaker 4 I had Kyler Murray. I know that.

Speaker 1 That's Kamara.

Speaker 4 See, I don't even remember, really. Had a Patriots defense.
That was always. Nice.

Speaker 1 They were pretty good this year. Yeah, I never got me.

Speaker 4 I had to play against me one time. That was just like it was too much.

Speaker 1 Oh, no. It's too much.

Speaker 1 So you lost, you were in the final?

Speaker 4 Huh? No, that was the semifinals. I had to play against me.

Speaker 1 You guys got PPR or just recording? Yeah, yeah, PPR. PPR.

Speaker 1 What was it? Like 0.10 per catch or a half a point catch? I got no clue.

Speaker 1 I mean, we love fancy football.

Speaker 1 We try to rank which of our guests have the best.

Speaker 4 I got mine inside of trading.

Speaker 1 Right. We're trying to get more, like, we're trying to get better because we always have to do that.

Speaker 4 So we have like a dynasty league. Yeah.

Speaker 1 It carries over.

Speaker 4 And so I had to pick all like leftover, like people that hadn't been drafted. So, it's kind of an interesting sweet.

Speaker 1 Who do you have dynasty-wise?

Speaker 4 So, now I'll probably, I'll probably keep Kamara, Kyler Murray. I got a bunch of rookies and stuff, so I'm building for the future.

Speaker 1 You don't want to pet yourself? Yeah, you didn't. Why not? Just too much pressure.
Why?

Speaker 4 I can't let myself down.

Speaker 1 You got to bet on yourself, though, right?

Speaker 4 Yeah. No, no, I can't let myself down.
That's

Speaker 4 like, because that's the thing. If I go out and suck, and then I lose in fantasy two, like, that's just too much to handle.

Speaker 1 It keeps life simple, though, because wouldn't it suck if you were awesome and then you lost in fantasy? It's like your day kind of stays. It's okay.

Speaker 1 Oh, I think fantasy is more important than real life.

Speaker 4 Yeah, that's one way to look at it.

Speaker 1 Yeah, absolutely. Do you ever tweet at players that you have on your fantasy team and you're like, hey, man, you just cost me my game this weekend?

Speaker 4 No, I'd usually talk crap to Chark because I had to play against him a couple times. So he was always, you know, he kind of sucked to play against.
I try to kind of look other places.

Speaker 1 Can you still feel Blake Bortle's presence in the locker room?

Speaker 4 Yeah, absolutely. Yeah.
I would imagine. Especially in the quarterback room.
Our quarterback coach is like super tight with him. So you still hear all the stories.

Speaker 4 Everybody loves him.

Speaker 1 I mean, Blake's literally the greatest human being. That's what everybody says.

Speaker 4 Everybody knows. No, like he actually is.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Like, literally.
He's like our best friend in the world. Like the best human being that's ever been created.
Yeah. By God.

Speaker 1 What's the best Blake Bordle story that still lingers in the locker room?

Speaker 4 You know, the big ones is with the kid coming up and giving him a beer at his house.

Speaker 1 The butcher's a good job.

Speaker 1 That's such a good story. That was our fault.

Speaker 1 If you were to request a token, an offering from a fan that would just come up to your doorbell and ring it and just hand you one of anything, what would it be? Great question.

Speaker 1 That is a great question.

Speaker 4 Thanks.

Speaker 1 Thanks, both of you guys. Thank you.

Speaker 4 Man, that'd probably be...

Speaker 4 You know, I don't know if a kid could carry this, but like a handle of... probably a Tito's.

Speaker 1 Okay. That'd be pretty cool.
Okay.

Speaker 4 I'm not saying any children in Jacksonville should do that.

Speaker 1 No, no, like a 21-year-old Tito.

Speaker 4 You definitely shouldn't do that.

Speaker 1 Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 1 Get your parents to bring the hand. Yeah, Titos.
You'll get an audio. Like a reverse trick-or-treating.
Right. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Exactly.

Speaker 1 I'd hate for that dad. Yeah, yeah.
Heaven forbid. Is it true the story that your grandfather wanted to name you Beowulf?

Speaker 1 What was that?

Speaker 4 Yeah, he's a pretty eccentric dude.

Speaker 1 Is your whole family just crazy people? Yeah. Okay.
I love this back to you. Yeah, Flint.
And then he went, and Flint's your dad.

Speaker 1 And then your grandfather was like, hey, Beowulf's a great name on the market.

Speaker 4 He's a big Beowulf. And then my dad wanted Tarzan for a little while

Speaker 4 because like when I was a little kid like he like he wouldn't read me like kids books he read me Tarzan Lord of the Apes like the 1800s classic like over and over because he didn't want to read freaking kids books right right so I think that has a lot to do with where I am today yes I would say so gee wait so if you were to go back and rename yourself you like gardener or are there times where you're like man I wish I was Tarzan that'd be sweet dude if I was Tarzan

Speaker 4 That'd been pretty cool. Like, like, it'd have been, you know, maybe been tough in like elementary school.

Speaker 4 But by then, like, I'm an expert at, like, climbing trees and just beating the crap out of people.

Speaker 1 It'd be,

Speaker 4 like, I'm leaning to it.

Speaker 1 Yeah, you have to adapt to the, to the, for sure. Honestly, like, I think being in elementary school, New Tarzan would kick ass.
Yeah. That would probably be the best part about it.
For sure.

Speaker 4 That says.

Speaker 1 Beowulf, though. Beowulf's awesome.
Great story. Just

Speaker 1 epic. I'm Team Grindel.
But that's just me.

Speaker 1 Oh, what is that? It's in Beowulf. Okay, I didn't read that book.
Nerd.

Speaker 1 What? Your dad, speaking of your dad, he said recently that he knew you were going going to be a QB the whole time, your whole life, NFL QB.

Speaker 4 Yeah,

Speaker 4 that seems like he's so yeah, like he's kind of lying there because he was a defensive tackle.

Speaker 4 And like we showed up to our first practice at flag football, and the coach was like, hey, your kid's going to play quarterback. He's like, what?

Speaker 4 But then

Speaker 4 he got on the bandwagon after that.

Speaker 4 So he's kind of a bandwagon since about

Speaker 1 fifth grade.

Speaker 4 He's been on the bandwagon.

Speaker 1 He's a pink hat Garbage Minster fan.

Speaker 1 That's perfect.

Speaker 1 When you got

Speaker 1 the opportunity to start in this league,

Speaker 1 were you nervous going to your first game or did you just have that confidence? Like, I got this, I can do it.

Speaker 4 I was probably more nervous. I used to get more nervous in high school more than anything.
And then it's just gotten less and less. I guess

Speaker 4 you feel like you're prepared more maybe.

Speaker 4 And then it's just like, man, this is just it's just fun, you know? It doesn't really feel like you're anything to be nervous about.

Speaker 1 George Kittle tells us that he pukes before every single game because he's got like, you know, just nervous butterflies or whatever stuff.

Speaker 4 You don't have have to deal with any of that no i used to puke like every every game like my first couple years of high school i did uh and then i got over it like someday i don't know i don't know

Speaker 1 um all right so my last question seeki question put in promo code take you get ten dollars off we're here with gardner minshew he won 2019 snickers hungriest player of the year that it actually is kind of it's like heisman

Speaker 1 Maybe the Masters green jacket, Snickers hungriest player of the year. That's just me.
I'm a sports fan. That's just me.
That's my ranking. So you won it.

Speaker 1 Has there been a moment since the whole Minshew mania and everything's been going crazy where you're like, like the guy who put a mural of you wrestling a tiger on the hood of his car?

Speaker 1 Like all these things. Have you had a moment where you're like, holy shit, what's going on here?

Speaker 4 I don't know, man.

Speaker 4 It's all pretty cool. It's all something I like, I've said I've wanted to do my whole life.
So now it's just kind of living it out. And like, it's just, it's been surreal.

Speaker 1 You're dangerously close to being a Blake. like we might put you in blake of the year nominee ah like honestly

Speaker 4 i wasn't gonna bring it up but that's what i was kind of hoping yeah right

Speaker 1 well then now you're not yeah yeah you give off blake energy but you also give off like uh you've got like a fire that blakes sometimes don't have it's like if we yeah yeah

Speaker 1 western here's the thing if you were a true blake you wouldn't be upset that we're not making you a blake you'd be like yeah whatever well if you're a true blake you we would have been like blake of the year and we would have been you you would have said what are you talking about?

Speaker 1 What is that? And we would have explained it. You'd be like, oh, that's kind of cool.
All right, let's go back to the top.

Speaker 1 I'll let you know.

Speaker 1 For my last question, I'm just going to give you an opportunity to sell us on you being a Blake. Mm-hmm.

Speaker 4 I mean, I really, like, I could care less.

Speaker 1 Like, it's not a big deal to me.

Speaker 4 Points. Good.
You know, so if y'all want to get it.

Speaker 4 I don't really understand the award.

Speaker 1 Right.

Speaker 4 But if y'all want to, if y'all want to do that, fine. Okay.

Speaker 1 Call you. We'll think.
Yeah. Yeah.
I'll tell you what, we'll think about it. Yeah.
Right now I'm... whatever.
You're close.

Speaker 1 No, but your answer about the Minshew Mania was the first time I was like, wait, like, a guy made a mural of him wrestling a tiger and put it on his car. Yeah.

Speaker 1 And you're like, yeah, I guess that's cool.

Speaker 4 Yeah. Your Blake dog was going off.

Speaker 1 Yeah, it was going beep, beep, beep, beep, beep. This guy, I know this guy.
He's a Blake. All right.
Well, Gardner, thank you. Appreciate it.
You're always welcome.

Speaker 1 Recurring guests for life. You literally have to come on every time we congrats on the chain.
Congrats on the chain. Congrats to Snickers for having such a great spokesperson.

Speaker 4 Good for Snickers.

Speaker 1 good for snickers snickers is the real winner

Speaker 1 i agree with that yeah what's your favorite snickers snickers okay nice that's perfect

Speaker 1 are there different kinds of snickers i don't know

Speaker 1 what

Speaker 1 to say i'm saying anyway.

Speaker 1 Today's a happy day to find you, to show me.

Speaker 1 I'm coming for you, I'm unfortunate.

Speaker 1 Come on,

Speaker 1 take

Speaker 1 me

Speaker 1 on

Speaker 1 to

Speaker 1 Observance

Speaker 1 but we stand a little way.

Speaker 1 Tell the earth that life is okay.

Speaker 1 Say I'm free.

Speaker 1 It's prepared to be sent for some

Speaker 1 take

Speaker 1 on

Speaker 1 me.

Speaker 1 Take

Speaker 1 me

Speaker 1 along

Speaker 1 I

Speaker 1 live

Speaker 1 down

Speaker 1 forever.