Coach O + Joe Burrow And We’re Still Drunk In New Orleans

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Speaker 1 On today's part of my take,

Speaker 1 we're live from New Orleans. You nailed that intro.

Speaker 1 You can keep my bourbon there. A little foreshadowing.

Speaker 1 I'll be honest, I might throw up during this time. The national championship game was unreal.
We're going to recap it. We got Coach O and Joe Burrow on the podcast, which is...

Speaker 1 Stupid just to even say that those two guys, as big as they are, they win a national title and and not like 10 hours later, they're sitting with us two fucking idiots. Felt like a dream, literally.

Speaker 1 Yeah, well, we were pretty drunk when we did the interview.

Speaker 1 We have all that coming up.

Speaker 3 When Cool Creamy Ranch meets tangy, bold buffalo, the hole is greater than the sum of its sauce. Say howdy, partner, to new Buffalo Ranch sauce only at McDonald's for a limited time.

Speaker 2 At participating, McDonald's.

Speaker 1 Okay, let's go. Boy!

Speaker 1 And then I can't blame all on the sun.

Speaker 1 Oh, no, we're gonna rock it down to Electric Ivenu.

Speaker 1 And then we take it higher.

Speaker 1 Oh, we're gonna rock it down to

Speaker 1 Welcome to part of my take presented by Cash App. Go download the Cash App right now.
You get $10

Speaker 1 and $10 to ASPCA. Today is Wednesday, January 15th.

Speaker 1 Holy shit, we're hungover. This is actually remarkable, though, that it has taken about three and a half years for us to do a half-drunk hungover episode like this.
It was so we're in New Orleans.

Speaker 1 If you've been living under a rock, we went, saw LSU, the dream season,

Speaker 1 and to set the stage, everyone knows like when we tape. We're taping Thursday nights, Sunday nights.
So we don't get, what, do we have ghosts again? Oh, no, yeah, turn that off.

Speaker 1 We don't get to like go out to sporting events. Like all the big sporting events we have to record after.
Last night was a big sporting event that we didn't have to record.

Speaker 1 And let's just say things got a little carried away. We vibes were at all time high.
Last night was

Speaker 1 a movie. It was a movie.

Speaker 1 Last night was such a movie slash a mood. Yeah, so it was a movie.
We didn't get home until like four in the morning. I slept in all my clothes.

Speaker 1 Then we went, woke up four hours later and interviewed Coach O and Joe Burrow. So that's coming up.
It's incredible. I want to put my hand up and say I apologize to Joe Burrow.

Speaker 1 So we were there to interview Coach O and we were in the lobby and I texted Joe and I was like, hey, we're here in the lobby if you want to come say hi. I met him outside.

Speaker 1 I was like, hey, good to see you. Shot the shit for a second.
Do you want to go say what's up to Hank and Big Cat? And he was like, sure.

Speaker 1 He walked into the room, dapped you guys up, and then immediately just sat down in the chair and picked up the microphone.

Speaker 1 I feel like I entrapped him into doing the podcast. He was ready.
Because he was just as drunk as we were. So it was so perfect.

Speaker 1 He slept through his Golik and Wingo interview, whatever that was supposed to be. Whoops.
Sorry, sorry, Trey. America's stepdad.
But he came into the room and he just like sat down.

Speaker 1 We started asking him questions on the record. So shout out to him for playing along.
Yeah. So the game.
Should we talk about the game? Should we talk about the game? Let's discuss.

Speaker 1 It was an incredible, incredible environment. Loud as hell.

Speaker 1 And guess what? I actually was nervous at a few points during the game. Now, Joe Burrow, you'll hear him say they were never nervous.
But I thought Clemson,

Speaker 1 that start of the game where they had them pinned and it was a field position battle. And then even in the second half, when Clemson, LSU, gets the ball, they're up 11.

Speaker 1 Everyone, like everyone, I don't know if you noticed this, PFT, because we were sitting in different spots, but going into half, I felt like the entire stadium was like, okay, this is going to be just a coronation in the second half because they were going to score and they're going to be up 18.

Speaker 1 When Clemson scored and got the two-point conversion,

Speaker 1 It got a little weird. Like there were kind of some weird vibes in the stadium.
People were like, wait, what's going on?

Speaker 1 I also think that when you're in New Orleans, something happens where you, like, out-drink yourself and you have those moments.

Speaker 1 Like, it was a collective moment in the stadium where everyone was like, fuck, I'm drunk. And wait, it's a three-point game because you just kind of let it get away from you.
That was just you.

Speaker 1 But doubting them was the, I mean.

Speaker 1 They are in the conversation for best college football team of all time. They beat five out of the top eight teams.
They destroyed everyone.

Speaker 1 They had the best resume of any college football team to ever exist.

Speaker 1 They just won the national championship in the college football playoff, the semifinal, by like 60 combined points. It was insane.

Speaker 1 And Joe Burrow, I looked up, and I don't know if you guys agree, but it was a little bit of a choppy, weird game at times.

Speaker 1 I look up, he's got over 400 yards passing and four plus TDs, and it's like, wait, that, what?

Speaker 1 Yeah, it was like a quiet 400 yards. It was crazy touchdown performance.
That's how crazy. I agree.
So in the first quarter, when

Speaker 1 they were losing the field position battle, they were getting pinned deep on their first three drives in a row.

Speaker 1 I was yelling. I was screaming at the field because I was like, you need to have a running back in the backfield.
At least pretend like you're going to run the ball. I was questioning the play calls.

Speaker 1 They were motioning. Oh, Brady, you were ready to open the booth.
Oh, big time. In the booth.
Big time. I was questioning all the play calls.

Speaker 1 They were like motioning Edwards Lair out of the backfield a lot. And I was like, you need to be able to at least present the illusion that you're going to run the football.

Speaker 1 That's why you're not able to advance the ball. And then my friend Hard Factor Will, who is sitting next to me, who's actually played football

Speaker 1 at a high level and went to LSU, he told me he was like, Actually, watch what they're doing. They're using him, bringing a safety up to guard him.

Speaker 1 Now they're going to exploit the side of the field that has gone safety less. And then the next drive, what do they do? Just Joe Burrow running dives to that side.

Speaker 1 And then, actually, this is funny. I forgot about this until just now.
I saw Joe Brady when I was meeting Joe Burrow today, and I was like, hey, man, I talked a lot of shit about your play calling.

Speaker 1 I thought it was bad on the first couple drives, but I guess that's why you do this for a living. And I just like burp on myself.
He was like, why is this drunk guy talking to me right now?

Speaker 1 Yeah, he was like, big fan, listen to the show. Thankfully,

Speaker 1 I don't actually take any of your advice ever.

Speaker 1 But it was one of those moments, you know what I'm saying? Where it's like,

Speaker 1 sometimes you think that you know what you're talking about, and at the end of the day, usually you're just an idiot. The whole thing is just insane, though.
Like, the coacho,

Speaker 1 it's crazy. It is a storybook of an ending, and of course, he's going to be the coach forever now at LSU.
He's the king of Louisiana.

Speaker 1 To think about how big of a joke he was after Ole Miss and the failures there, and everyone was like, this guy's not a head coach.

Speaker 1 And even I was like, you know, back in the day when I loved Interim Ed, I was like, he can't be a head coach. Like, I love Ed Ogeron, and I had my doubts.
And imagine what everyone else thinks.

Speaker 1 There was so many people tweeting about like that one where the two reporters were like, yeah, LSU hired coach Ed Ogeron. We laughed about it for about a half hour.
Like this was in 2017.

Speaker 1 So for him to not get the job at USC, go to LSU, be the interim there.

Speaker 1 get the job when a lot of people were like, no, this guy shouldn't have the job, have a team that is now one of the best teams of all time, 15-0.

Speaker 1 oh yeah, and win a national title in New Orleans, in Louisiana, in his home state. And he loves, Coach O loves Louisiana more than anyone loves anything.
Like you can feel it.

Speaker 1 You can see it in his eyes. You can hear it in his voice.
And the whole thing, there was a few times last night I was like, I can't believe this happened. It's why you root for sports.

Speaker 1 It's why you watch sports to have these moments that pay off everything. If you're an LSU fan, and we're Coach O fans, we're Joe Burrow fans.
Like, we're, you know, I'm not going to do Stolen Valor.

Speaker 1 We were sitting next to

Speaker 1 three generations of LSU fans when we were pre-gaming.

Speaker 1 Those guys

Speaker 1 live and die with LSU football. We were just kind of along for the ride.
They blew

Speaker 1 incredible to watch. Yeah, it was great.

Speaker 1 And it is, even if you're not a fan, if you have no dog in the fight at all, watching Coach O win the national championship is something that you have to appreciate. Incredible.
You have to cry.

Speaker 1 When Coach O cries, you cry. Yes.
Those are the rules.

Speaker 1 That's guy code. I do wish that they had the president of the NCAA present the trophy just so everyone could boo him.

Speaker 1 Those are always a good part of championships. Like when Betman comes out or Goodell comes out, everyone's booing the shit out of him.
That was the only thing that missed.

Speaker 1 The trophy presentation was fun, though. We stayed in there for it.
The only problem with this trophy presentation, according to Hank, is it was not enough Patriots trophy presentations. No, NHL.

Speaker 1 They do it in NHL too.

Speaker 1 Other things from the game. Yeah, so first quarter, Dabbo punts the ball twice inside the 40.
He was David Shawing. He was Bill O'Brien big time.

Speaker 1 He punched the ball twice on their first two drives inside the 40-yard line. Then he kicks a field goal that was longer than one of the punts.

Speaker 1 But that was the second quarter, so he had the wind at his back. Yeah, he needed it.
He's going the other way in the dome. There also, I guess, was a suspect.

Speaker 1 offensive pass interference call. I was too drunk to know whether it was right or wrong, but I saw people complaining about it.
So this is me commenting on it for a while.

Speaker 1 For Clemson, That was bullshit. Yeah, there was a right to go.
Yeah, I know. I don't remember.
There was also a targeting penalty. I just remember being like, where they

Speaker 1 ejected the guy with the neck roll for targeting. And it was, the environment inside the Superdome was such a football environment that even LSU fans were booing that ejection.
Yes.

Speaker 1 They were like, no, let the boy stay in and let him play. Let that boy put his hat on a hat.

Speaker 1 The Superdome is,

Speaker 1 that's a wild place, just in general. It's also, I don't know if this is what happens every single game in the Super Dome.
There was just standing water all over the place.

Speaker 1 Like the corridors, I watched people just slip and fall

Speaker 1 every single two minutes. I took a shit in the Superdome bathroom, which was, thank you for my service.
That was... a ballsy decision on my part.
Raw dogged it.

Speaker 1 Was too drunk to even be like, who cares? Sometimes it happens. Yeah, and it was.

Speaker 1 Jambalaya. Dude.
The jambalaya in the Superdome is amazing. And I hadn't eaten all day, and I was like, we had like way too many beers.
I was like, emergency jambalaya didn't go so well.

Speaker 1 You broke, you smashed the glass in case of emergency and ordered jambalaya in a football stadium. But it is actually good.
Like their jambalaya there is pretty good.

Speaker 1 I also took a shit in the Super Dome

Speaker 1 last night. But that was more of a thing where I went to the bathroom and I was like, well, actually, this is going to turn into a longer visit than I had planned.

Speaker 1 It was not premeditated shit.

Speaker 1 It was a great time. The whole thing was a scene.
The people of Louisiana are like the nicest people in the world. I went down on Monday morning to eat breakfast at the bar downstairs in our hotel.

Speaker 1 I was sitting there. The guy sitting next to me was probably about 55, 60 years old.
In the 25 minutes I was there, he had four beers and talked my ear off. And I was cool with, like, he was,

Speaker 1 it wasn't an annoying talk your ear off. He was just fun to be around, like talking about the game, talking about strategy.
9.30 in the morning, he's four beers deep. We're just chopping up football.

Speaker 1 What was funny was yesterday before the game, before we went out to the tailgate, we had a little drink upstairs on the roof of our hotel.

Speaker 1 Yes, and like you alluded to, there were three generations of LSU fans. What just occurred to me was that the oldest guy was probably anywhere between 60 and 90.
I can't be sure what his age was.

Speaker 1 And he had his son there, and then his son had his son there. And

Speaker 1 the middle child,

Speaker 1 the father, the father/slash son, was apologizing. You're lost again.

Speaker 1 Was apologizing for the grandfather's behavior because he was drunk. Well, you see,

Speaker 1 and then the son was apologizing for his dad's behavior. It was a human centipede of being sorry and drunk in Louisiana.
It was great. I didn't mind anything.

Speaker 1 Oh, we sat next to this Three Generations LSU fans for probably about a half hour while we were pre-gaming. And I think the grandfather had 20 different high-fives with each of us.

Speaker 1 Just every two minutes, we'd be like, High five. He hurt five, and he died.
He hurt my hand, but it kind of felt good. Also, sidebar, you weren't sitting with us.

Speaker 1 I did get slapped in my face last time. Oh, yeah, so let's talk about after the game.

Speaker 1 Yeah, after the game, I got dommed. It was an insane scene.

Speaker 1 It's crazy to be in a city where everyone, I mean, this is a pretty much it's only New Orleans and Vegas, where you're in a city and every single person is blackout drunk with you.

Speaker 1 Like the whole, the bourbon street was an absolute scene. Everyone was just so, so happy.
Greatest, greatest vibes ever. Greatest time.
We had a good crew.

Speaker 1 We had Rasillo, Chris Long, Anthony Rizzo showed up. Like we had a good crew that we were rocking around with.
I would like to apologize because playing back last night. I got addicted to dabbing.

Speaker 1 I fell back on my old ways. You were dabbing.
I think I dabbed like 400 times in the bar.

Speaker 1 At one point, at the first bar that we went to, this is all coming back to me.

Speaker 1 I started the limbo line. I think with Roan, right? Yeah.
Or Tommy. Yeah, we have Ron and Kayla with us.
Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 1 So we started the limbo line, which is always a hit if you're at a wedding or anywhere, just like get a limbo line going with your belt. People love you, think that you're really fun.

Speaker 1 So we started that, and there was like a line of four people going underneath it.

Speaker 1 I look over to the other end of the bar, and Big Cat is just solo dabbing, just dabbing my face, dabbing his face off by himself.

Speaker 1 It was so fun last night.

Speaker 1 I'd like to apologize to Steve Levy because so I've met I've met Steve Levy twice now back-to-back nights and the first night I met him I was blackout drunk and I remember while I was talking to him I was slurring my words and I was like Steve I apologize for being blackout drunk when I meet you the first time sir and then I saw him again last night and I was like sir I'd like to apologize for my behavior last night sir it was a scene even Sunday night we didn't even because we we did the show before we went out we saw Charlie Whitehurst at the casino.

Speaker 1 I mean, the whole thing was a ridiculous weekend. That's actually, that was one of the worst surreal times of my life.
So we're at the blackjack table. You're winning.

Speaker 1 You won a lot of money. Well, our friend

Speaker 1 Rich asked Big Cat for money. Yeah, was kept on doing the, he was like, you won't, you won't put more in.
You won't put more in.

Speaker 1 So then I just had bets that I just didn't, like, I was betting everything on every hand. Right.
And winning.

Speaker 1 So I turn around at one point in the night, and I see a dude rocking a swaggy, flat-billed cowboy-style hat. And I was like, that is a sweet Charlie Whitehurst hat in my internal monologue.

Speaker 1 And then he turned around, and it was Charlie Whitehurst. Dude, Charlie Whitehurst.
I was talking to Charlie Whitehurst, and he was, then his brother introduced himself.

Speaker 1 He's like, I'm Jesse Whitehurst. Like, I was supposed to be like, oh, sweat.
Okay, dude. Like, that's cool.

Speaker 1 Can I introduce an actual sports statistic right now? Yeah, please. Joe Burrow, a new segment, actual sports statistics.

Speaker 1 Joe Burrow was 402 for 527 on the year, 76%,

Speaker 1 5,671 passing yards, 60 touchdowns,

Speaker 1 six interceptions,

Speaker 1 four rushing touchdowns. That is probably.
Don't fuck him up, Cincinnati. That is probably the best college football season of all time.

Speaker 1 And I think it's time to have the conversation whether or not Urban Meyer, if it's a stain on his legacy, that he did not start Joe Burrow. Is he a bad talent evaluator? Yes.
We should,

Speaker 1 as a nation, need to have that conversation. It's true.
Another fun fact: do your pod,

Speaker 1 Tom Brady, when he broke the record for touchdowns in the season, the touchdown, fuck, there's a ghost right now.

Speaker 1 Keep going. Just pop it.

Speaker 1 He threw the touchdown to Rainy Moss in the past last night to give Joe Burrow the college

Speaker 1 record was to Rainy Moss's son. Oh, that is a fun fact.
Joe Burrow just destroyed the all-time passing yards. It was in the record.

Speaker 1 When you see who's second place, he beat it by like a thousand yards. I also liked OBJ just like treating it like he won a ring, like a Super Bowl ring.
Passing out money. That was awesome.

Speaker 1 Just handing out money. I think it's fine if it's guys who are...
I don't know if he checked the roster and was like, all right, these guys are going pro, but I know.

Speaker 1 I know they said it was fake after. He did? They covered, LSU did.
They covered their bases. That was the same.

Speaker 1 Yeah, just if he was, I might start doing that, like printing my own money with my face on it and just handing it out to like wisconsin guys someone gave me a two-dollar bill last night dude clemson fans just walk around with two dollar bills i they just kept on handing me two dollar bills i i tipped the blackjack dealer a lot of two dollar bills and i'm sorry if it is fake but that's a they I swear to god, is it a Clemson thing?

Speaker 1 I don't know what it is. They just were handing out $2 bills.
That's the highest Clemson nomination they have in South Carolina. It looks real.

Speaker 1 I started talking shit about South Carolina on the interview with Stanford Steve, and I think I'm going to lean into it and just be an anti-South Carolina guy.

Speaker 1 But yeah, it's fucking weird to just roll around with $2 bills. Also, everybody that was wearing Clemson orange yesterday, they were all wearing just golf shirts tucked in their khakis.

Speaker 1 Yeah, that's a look. It was kind of strange.
That's a look. It's like, let your hair down.
Pull it a little bit. We had a crying kid in front of us.
That sucked. I felt bad for him.
The Clemson kid.

Speaker 1 He had like 75 autographs on his shirt. Oh, yeah.
No,

Speaker 1 he had a, so as a little kid, he had like a million autographs in his shirt. His dad was also wearing a hat with a million autographs on it.

Speaker 1 Autograph fits. Yeah.
It was also the most random thing ever with two minutes left on the game. Oh my god, holy shit.
Two rows in front of you.

Speaker 1 Two rows in front of us, maybe like five seats to the right.

Speaker 1 I just hear a big cat, you've been sitting here the whole time? And I look, it's fucking Bill Burr. He was sitting like 10 feet from us the entire game with his parents.
Shout out Bill Burr, too.

Speaker 1 He went to a Pelicans game. He completed all NBA stadiums.
Oh, check. So that's Bruce King.
Bill Burr loves just sports. I love that about him.

Speaker 1 He's just like, yeah, I'm just here for the national title game. That's what the fuck.
Who cares? But he was right next to us the whole game. We didn't figure it out until the fourth quarter.

Speaker 1 I had Joey Chestnut and Darius Leonard sitting right next to me. And Darius, we had just interviewed earlier in the day.
And when he sat down, I talked some shit to him.

Speaker 1 And at first, he did, I don't think he remembered me from earlier in the day. Yes.

Speaker 1 And then after like I talked, you'll have to listen to the interview, but after I talked the specific shit that I did, he was like, oh, okay. Yeah, I got you.

Speaker 1 It's so weird because I think it's such a big corporate thing where all these celebrities and athletes can't, they're not sitting in suites. Like, Cam Jordan was right next to us, too.

Speaker 1 It's wild to see. It's like a crazy scene.
The whole night was just.

Speaker 1 It's about to be a hard time. You might have to throw up.
You have to throw up? Is there a trash can in this hotel room? So I'll do an ad and then we'll do who's bad. Yeah, please.

Speaker 1 Take the wheel. Barstoolgold.com slash PMT, by the way, if you want to watch us just die in this hotel room.
Also, can I just say that? BarstoolGold.com slash PMT.

Speaker 1 Clemson, I think that we should revoke the nickname Tigers from them. Yes.
They're no longer the Tigers. They got out-tigered.

Speaker 1 I think that I'm going to puke at the trash can in a second.

Speaker 1 We should call them the Eldricks.

Speaker 1 The Clemson Eldricks. I like that.

Speaker 1 LSU is the official tiger. I like that.
All right.

Speaker 1 Listen, put the mic down so that we don't have to redo an ad while you throw up.

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Go in the other room. Go in the bathroom.
Go in the bathroom.

Speaker 1 Go in the bathroom while I do the ad. Please.

Speaker 1 No, you're going to, yeah, it's going to make everyone...

Speaker 1 It's leaking. The trash can's leaking.
So, yeah, that's bad. Who knows? It's just wet in the city of New Orleans.
It's just wet. All right, I'm going to wait to do the ad.

Speaker 1 I'm not going to do this to Phillips Snoralco. All right, let's do

Speaker 1 Tigerwood Sun Swing. Yeah, Charlie, sick swing.
Sick swing. All right, PFT's back.
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Speaker 1 Okay, let's do hot seat cool throne, and then we're going to get to our interviews, and then we're going to just go die. I don't know.

Speaker 1 I'm in that dangerous spot right now where I'm hungover, but it hasn't fully hit yet. I'm bracing for the full hit.
Yeah, I guess so. I have a few hot seats.
I'm talking this out right now.

Speaker 1 This is kind of a future me situation because we have a video coming out today. It will be out now if you're listening to this of PFT training to get ready for the XFL.

Speaker 1 have some very special guests, Hall of Fame guests. Can we say who it is?

Speaker 1 They're a Hall of Famer.

Speaker 1 They are a Hall of Famer, yeah.

Speaker 1 And one future Hall of Famer/slash coach, probably, Jeff Fisher.

Speaker 1 Two wins away from being top 10 all time.

Speaker 1 But

Speaker 1 I was working on it on Monday, but I kind of put it off. I was like, oh,

Speaker 1 he's ready to go.

Speaker 1 I was like, oh, well,

Speaker 1 you know, we get into Houston at like 8 o'clock. I was like, I'll just bang it out all night.
And now I'm on like zero sleep. And all I want to do is just go to Houston and sleep.

Speaker 1 So I'm on the hot seat. You're on the hot seat for just disrespecting and not appreciating all things that are holy with Jumpsuit January.
Oh, that's fine. Yeah.

Speaker 1 I've been through this enough. I wasn't going to lose my phone last night.
I just wasn't going to have it happen. That's why you talked about the jumpsuit with the sippers on.

Speaker 1 The sweatpant situation when I'm drunk, like I would have lost everything. It's just like.
We did a periscope last night. I don't know.
And I deleted it.

Speaker 1 I don't know.

Speaker 1 You and I did a walking periscope,

Speaker 1 because I woke up and everyone was like, where'd the periscope go? I'm like, what? What periscope? Yeah, so, Hank, we're getting up at, what, like, 7 o'clock tomorrow? Yep. You got this.

Speaker 1 We did the tryout for the.

Speaker 1 I'm realistically probably not even going to... I might not even sleep again.
Hell yeah. All right.
You're a scout.

Speaker 1 We'll sleep.

Speaker 1 You are a beast. Sleep when you're dead.

Speaker 1 No sleep till Brooklyn.

Speaker 1 But you don't live in Brooklyn anymore. What's your cool throne?

Speaker 1 I don't have one. Okay.
Okay. Cool.
Cool throne is the segment.

Speaker 1 Cool throne is

Speaker 1 a video out PFT training for the XFL. Go watch it.
There you go.

Speaker 1 My hot seat is me because Ocho Senko is trying out for my position, I guess. I found out earlier today that Chad Ocho Senko is also trying out to be a kicker in the XFL.

Speaker 1 I guess great minds think alike.

Speaker 1 But I saw some of his videos. He hit a 60-yarder.
It's very impressive, Chad.

Speaker 1 But, I mean, 60-yarder, no pads outdoors there was probably some wind at your back i'm not scared of you chad i'm coming for you chad i'm a better kicker than you i'm more accurate they call me mr 35 yards that's what they call me because i go i go 99 from 35 yards

Speaker 1 so i don't care if i can't kick a 60 yarder but i can hit a 35 yarder twice all right yes uh my other hot seat is uh Actually, I don't have another hot seat. My cool throne

Speaker 1 is

Speaker 1 Coach Hare. No, your hot seat was Vince Vaughn.
Oh, yeah, that's right. Well, no, no, you're wrong.
My Cool Throne was going to be

Speaker 1 defending Vince Vaughn online against an army of attackers. Yes.
So Vince Vaughn was pictured talking to Donald Trump last night in, I guess, the only suite that exists in the Superdome.

Speaker 1 They were hanging out. He was making jokes.
Trump liked him.

Speaker 1 Like two people went after Vince Vaughn. And then two million people went after the two people

Speaker 1 that went after Vince Vaughn.

Speaker 1 He was only so he was trending because people were tweeting, Vince Vaughn is trending because he's being friends with the president. But he actually wasn't.

Speaker 1 He was trending because people were tweeting Vince Vaughn is being attacked because he's tweeting the reaction president. Yes.
And then, what? That statement's giving me a headache.

Speaker 1 It's just an overreaction. But you know what I'm saying, though, right? Yeah.
Yeah. They're like, can't believe people are complaining about this.
Like, there's two people complaining about it.

Speaker 1 And then there's 7 billion people complaining about the complainers. I mean, I'll be honest, that's kind of what we do about Doug Gottlieb and Danny Connell.
No, Doug Gottlieb doesn't get interaction.

Speaker 1 That's true. So he doesn't even have the two.
He tweets

Speaker 1 into the void. He tweets and might as well throw his phone into outer space.

Speaker 1 Danny Cannell is just a professional provocateur. He's a professional turtleneck.
He is. He gets the people going.
My other cool throne is Coach Hare. So Coach Hare is on the cool throne.

Speaker 1 I don't know if you guys have noticed this, but during football games, whatever camera angles and camera filters or whatever they use to focus on coaches on the sidelines, they can take a coach that is probably not losing their hair and make it look like that coach is balding.

Speaker 1 Every coach looks balding on college football broadcasts. Coach O, his hair overpowered that.
Oh, he's not great. He was the only person that I've ever seen not look like they're going bald.

Speaker 1 Great heading.

Speaker 1 Using that camera angle. He's a great looking man.

Speaker 1 Yeah, also Cool Throne is giant state troopers escorting coaches out to midfield yes to shake hands that's also cool throne is seek eeek for hooking us up last night and used promo code take for ten dollars off see geek purchase i should say the

Speaker 1 see geek hooked it up big time for the best yesterday if you buy your tickets from anywhere else don't i don't want to fucking know you yeah just delete my number yeah if you if i see you using the other guys

Speaker 1 it's on site I mean, to quote Derek Rhodes, kill yourself.

Speaker 1 But that's just slang from Chicago. That's just Derrick Rose.
That wasn't me. That was Derrick Rose that's quoting him.
All right, my hot seat is

Speaker 1 Nick Saban. You see, Nick Saban got roasted.
Oh,

Speaker 1 nope.

Speaker 1 Nick Saban got roasted. They were like right in front of us, too.
Saban and why did Saban do that? Why did he do the telecast?

Speaker 1 I think he did it just so that he could talk shit to members of the media, just to get closer to the TV personalities that don't like him. It's like,

Speaker 1 no, I don't, I mean, to have your rival win and you're doing the, I don't know. I don't think I would, as soon as LSU's there, I think I'd be like, you know what, I'm going to sit this one out.

Speaker 1 Let Jimbo do it because Jimbo does it every single year. Right.
But it was a weird move. So Sabin became a meme, I think, for a minute.
I don't know. We weren't really following on Twitter.

Speaker 1 And then my Cool Throne is.

Speaker 1 Imagine explaining to Nick Sabin what a meme is and how he is one right now. Oh, he has no idea what's going on.
He could get roasted forever. He would log off from that conversation.
No question.

Speaker 1 Immediately. My cool throne is Magic Johnson.
He's back. So he sent out a very great personal

Speaker 1 hot seat AIDS and Donald Sterling. Cool throne, Magic Johnson.

Speaker 1 Great personal anecdote after the game. He said, I want to personally congratulate Coach Ogeron for winning the national championship.
I met him when he was coach at USC.

Speaker 1 Okay, that was pretty nice. That's good.
So really touching. Really put a personal, like, at first I was like, why is Magic talking about college football?

Speaker 1 And then I met him at USC, and it's like, oh, now it all makes sense. I get why you're tweeting this.
I love that the end of a Magic Johnson anecdote is the beginning of a normal person's anecdote.

Speaker 1 Yes.

Speaker 1 I met him at USC.

Speaker 1 That's the final part of his story that he's telling.

Speaker 1 I did see a shitload of people tweeting their encounters with Ed O'Geron last night, and every single one of them was just like, Ed O'Geron is God.

Speaker 1 I love him. I'm in love with Coach O'Connor.
He really should be like a picture in every single house in the state of Louisiana. I'm a little bit worried because my brain has been broken.

Speaker 1 My brain has been broken by the internet. I'm a little bit afraid that the tide will eventually turn on Coach Obama.

Speaker 1 I know it's not. Enjoy the moment.
I'm trying to. I love him.

Speaker 1 Enjoy the moment. I'm getting pre-mad.
No, don't, don't. That aren't even mad yet.
Do not. Do not.
Do not. He won a title less than 24 hours ago.
Okay, if anyone's talking shit on Coach.

Speaker 1 You're bad vibing. Point them to the vibe.
You're bad vibing. Vibe vampire.
Don't do it. You're an energy vampire.

Speaker 1 Yes, we don't need energy vampires here.

Speaker 1 All right, let's do our interviews. What we do need, guys,

Speaker 1 what we should have, and we do need, is CBD, CB,

Speaker 1 C,

Speaker 1 C D, C B D

Speaker 1 M D. I wish I had some CBD MD right about now.
Because

Speaker 1 CBD MD is the

Speaker 1 best. You messed it up again.
We're already two weeks in the new year. For those of you taking Big Cat's 2020 challenge, which I will do my push-ups during PFT's next ad read.

Speaker 1 I have not done them today, but don't give up. What's up, guys? It's Big Cat here making my Irish entrance with proper number 12 Irish whiskey.
How do you make an Irish entrance, you ask?

Speaker 1 It starts with a shot of proper number 12 Irish whiskey because real friends don't let friends Irish exit a party without a story to tell.

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Speaker 1 So get out there and make your Irish entrance. Anything else just wouldn't be proper.
We're gonna do Joe Burrow and then we're gonna do Cocho.

Speaker 1 We were very drunk for both these interviews, but I think they were funny.

Speaker 1 All right.

Speaker 1 We're

Speaker 1 in New Orleans in the Marriott. We have the Heisman Trophy winner, the national champion winner, Joe Burrow, Big Dick Joe.

Speaker 1 That hat was awesome, by the way.

Speaker 1 You said you just woke up 10 minutes ago. We're in the same clothes that we were last night.
He slept through the

Speaker 1 Golic and Wingo interview or whatever it was. Whoops.
Kind of on purpose.

Speaker 1 They were banging on my door at 8.30 in the morning, so I didn't really want to get up. It is funny that they make you do interviews now.

Speaker 1 You have no obligations. Like, I would be on camera, and I would look like crap because I would have literally zero sleep.
Yeah. And I would be going on camera with these people

Speaker 1 and look like a fool. Well, now you're with us, and we're just

Speaker 1 with the podcast. Right.
I mean, we're the exact same as you.

Speaker 1 Trust me, we are drunker than you are.

Speaker 1 You can't see my beady little eyes right now. Yeah.

Speaker 1 So, dude, you won the national title. Yes.
Yes, we did. That was crazy.
Pretty cool. Were you ever at any point in the game worried? Because you guys did go down.
Yeah, honestly, never. Not even...

Speaker 1 No rah-rah speech? No rah-rah speech. Like, when we were down 17-7, we didn't even say anything on the sideline.
Really? We knew what... We had to.

Speaker 1 I mean, that seems like you probably should talk about the plays. I mean, we really didn't.
We didn't say anything to each other. We just went out there and started playing football.
Like,

Speaker 1 we agreed. We knew what we had to do.
It was like the second or third play of the game where you rolled out. First play of the game.
First play of the game.

Speaker 1 You were flushed out of the pocket and you rolled out to your right, hit a receiver downfield. They called it back.
At that point, I was so mad because it was an awesome play. Yes, it was.

Speaker 1 I don't care if there's a penalty on it. The play was so awesome that they should have let it stand.

Speaker 1 Let us remember that play. That was a tough one.
The first play of the game, and it minus three instead of plus 45. Yeah.
So that was a tough one.

Speaker 1 Well, you also have like a thing going right now, and I'm sure you've recognized it. Maybe you haven't, but like you just can do whatever you want, and it ends up being a good play.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 Like that thing that you did against Oklahoma when you were just running and you just threw the ball

Speaker 1 just up. You probably won't be able to do that in the NFL as much, but right now you might as well just fucking milk it for all it's worth.
Like I can just throw it up and let my guys get it.

Speaker 1 We'll be talking in meetings about like

Speaker 1 protections and getting the blitzes picked up and I'm really good at that but

Speaker 1 I also say if I don't get it picked up they still have to tackle me back there. Yes.
And they can't do that. Yes.
Hell yes.

Speaker 1 Was there a rah-rah speech that Coach O gave at halftime? No, not really.

Speaker 1 I mean we just went and sat in there went about our business drank our water said these guys can't mess with us and went back out and played football. These guys can't mess with us.

Speaker 1 I actually was more nervous for you guys at the second half when the second half starts. And I was like, if they score, if LSU scores seven here, it's game over.

Speaker 1 But Clemson scores, so it's a three-point game. They get the two-point conversion.
No nerves then? No, like, hey, they just, if they mess with us, if they on the same field, they just can't touch us.

Speaker 1 I mean, yeah.

Speaker 1 I mean,

Speaker 1 we were playing with so much confidence right there. I really don't think...
anybody ever could have could have stopped us. I mean, we were

Speaker 1 I mean, we were just rolling. We had

Speaker 1 I mean I could just throw up a I could throw the ball with my eyes closed my receivers were going to go catch it. That's how we felt and

Speaker 1 I mean we were just playing with so much confidence.

Speaker 1 You guys are the definition of a goddamn machine. LSU's offense

Speaker 1 has been a machine this entire year just steamrolling everybody.

Speaker 1 So it makes sense that you would be confident even after like a slow start the first couple drives that you're able to put together if you just do what you did all year leading up to this point.

Speaker 1 So

Speaker 1 right now. Is this question?

Speaker 1 What?

Speaker 1 I'm so fucked up.

Speaker 1 I think we all are.

Speaker 1 No, I was just talking.

Speaker 1 I don't think I was talking. It wasn't a question.
I was just

Speaker 1 speaking.

Speaker 1 I got lost in it. Oh, here's a good question.

Speaker 1 If everyone could see all of our faces right now,

Speaker 1 we're so swollen. You look like a bunch of whales that have just been

Speaker 1 salt on. I've died inside of your question.
Everyone's like, where are we?

Speaker 1 Everyone's eyes are so beady.

Speaker 1 Here's a good question. Could LSU beat the Bengals? Ooh, there it is.
We should talk about it. Oh, no comment.

Speaker 1 When do we get our check? What do we say? What do we decide? 10%, right? 10%. Oh, you guys opted to...
Oh, is it last? Oh, no, it's less. You guys opted by 10,000 fold, huh?

Speaker 1 Not math, guys. Wait, so how long do you have to have to start doing combine shit? That's kind of sad.
I'm going to probably

Speaker 1 celebrate for about a week. Nice.
And then go home and celebrate a little more. Nice.

Speaker 1 And then go to California and start throwing the football around. Perfect.
Yeah. Eat a lot of ice cream.
Because it's not like I really have to do a lot of things

Speaker 1 at the combine. Just get yourself ready.
Oh, don't bench press.

Speaker 1 No. No.

Speaker 1 Like Brady Quinn. Brady Quinn.
Brady Quinn, 24. Yeah, he benched and he got draft press.
You know, coming out of high school,

Speaker 1 I honestly said going into the combine, I was going to break that. Yeah, you should.
That'd be good, Joe. But I haven't known the last time I benched.

Speaker 1 Well, yeah, don't do it. You're going to hurt yourself if you do.

Speaker 1 You.

Speaker 1 So, wait, that was such a gross burp.

Speaker 1 Walk me through

Speaker 1 what happened last night after the game's over, and then you have to do like interviews and shit. Like,

Speaker 1 what has your last 12 hours been like?

Speaker 1 Well, first of all, there was about 45 minutes of sleep.

Speaker 1 We got in at like 7.30 last night.

Speaker 1 I don't know where we went. Don't ask me where we went because I...
Did you went out to bars? We went somewhere. Did you not just get mobbed? I i don't know

Speaker 1 to be honest did you have a police escort into a bar i think we had a little section oh man that's awesome we went out with like all the former players

Speaker 1 so that was a lot of fun did odell give you money um

Speaker 1 yeah i i'm not i'm not a student athlete anymore so i can say yeah yeah that's sick so much money because you just hand out cash yeah i was thinking that it would have been awesome if odell just like printed fake cash and started handing out just the fluff

Speaker 1 yeah yeah like all of that you look at it and you try to pay for a drink. You're like, wait, this is, sir.
This is monopoly money. Sir, this isn't really.
That's worth more in Louisiana.

Speaker 1 That's sick that he was just handing out cash. How much cash did he bring? I don't know.

Speaker 1 So you guys had your own private section at bars last night, I'm assuming. You weren't just out walking down the road.
No, we weren't just

Speaker 1 in the mosh pit.

Speaker 1 All right, so then you, so you barely slept. I don't sleep.
There's no reason to sleep. So you're going to Baton Rouge tonight.
That's going going to be fun.

Speaker 1 You know, I'll probably have to.

Speaker 1 So they said we have a parade this weekend. So I might have to save up so I can gronk that parade.
Oh, yes.

Speaker 1 It's nice because when I feel like the college championships, they don't get to really booze the same because there's so many guys. But I'm graduating.

Speaker 1 And I'm 23 years old, so I can do

Speaker 1 whatever the hell I want.

Speaker 1 Do you think you're too old?

Speaker 1 I mean,

Speaker 1 it's really not fair how old I am that I'm playing against these. But also, like, for the draft, you, like, I'm as a draft Nick guy, I look for potential.
You're 23, dude. I'm 23.
That's way too old.

Speaker 1 That is going to be a question going into it. Like, oh, you're definitely.
Why is he a senior? Why is a senior entering the draft?

Speaker 1 I think I'll still make plenty of money. Yeah.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 I think you're going to be all right.

Speaker 1 Have you thought about that yet? Yeah. That's fucking.

Speaker 1 It's about to be on. I'm about to make like.
It's about to be on in the bank account. That's the one.
Checking account. It's about to be on.

Speaker 1 What's it going to be like going to class on Wednesday?

Speaker 1 You got to ask someone else about that one. I'm done.
I got my two degrees. That's going to be.
Yeah, you're on. Yeah.
Well, no, you told the online class. Online class.
Online class, baby.

Speaker 1 Hook that up. NFL quarterback at college.
Is Odell still here? Can we get him to give us some money? Is he here? I'll call him up. Yeah.
See if he can get

Speaker 1 a lot of stuff. Yeah, we just got a couple of residuals like, yo, what's up, man? Give you guys a nickel each or something? Yeah, he was just like, here's 20.

Speaker 1 I said, what's up to him at the Alabama game last year? And I was like, this is actually Big Cat's technique that he taught me. Yes.
It is to be like, yo, Odell, good to see you again.

Speaker 1 Yeah, that's all you got to say. And when you say that,

Speaker 1 he assumes that he's met you before.

Speaker 1 And he was like, yeah, yeah, yeah, good to see you, man. It's great seeing you, man.
That's what I say to every single famous person that I've never met before.

Speaker 1 People have used that technique on me plenty of times, and it works. I tell you, it works.
And it sucks right now, too, because we're saying it out loud.

Speaker 1 I think we said it out loud before, but now people use it on us. And I get very confused.
People are like, great seeing you. I'm like,

Speaker 1 shit, do you you work on our third?

Speaker 1 It's gotten to the point where I just say that every time I meet somebody in case I met them before. Yes.
I just say good seeing you, man. Great seeing you.
Pal, chief.

Speaker 1 In terms of your body right now,

Speaker 1 I know you're banged up. It's a wonderland.
I know it's amazing. You have an amazing body, Joe.
I know it's banged up,

Speaker 1 but is just the high of winning the national championship like totally overwhelming your physical like aches and pains that are going on? yeah it's it's overcoming my violent hangover right now

Speaker 1 so i'm feeling you're 22 you don't get 20overs i'm getting pretty old just just wait till you're 30. did you break your ribs

Speaker 1 um no good question i tore some cartilage in my ribs okay because everyone was freaking out and then i freaked out and i wasn't in a state to freak out and i was just like he's broken ribs it's very weird feeling to have like injuries happen while you're at a game and have no idea what's going on yeah everyone's like look at him.

Speaker 1 He's not comfortable in the pocket. I was like, okay.

Speaker 1 I'm in one drive. How many yards did I have? Dude, that was the most casual.
That's probably him. That was Coacho knocking on the door.
Yeah, that was the most casual. Let me go get him.

Speaker 1 That was the most casual 400-yard plus performance. Like, I looked up.
I was like, wait, Joe's got 400-plus yards? What the fuck?

Speaker 1 That was casual. Especially after those first, especially after those first, like, three

Speaker 1 drives.

Speaker 1 Oh, here he's coming.

Speaker 1 Coach O's coming. We're coming.
How many times did you say that?

Speaker 1 We're just going to keep this in. No, a lot.
How bad was that, burp?

Speaker 1 That was bad. Hank was going to keep rolling.
Oh, yeah, that was gross. Yeah, that was disgusting.

Speaker 1 Coach!

Speaker 1 Excuse me, I have not changed since last interview.

Speaker 1 I got him. I gotta roll, man.
I wanna get it. I don't want to go outside.
Here we go.

Speaker 1 All right, here we go. Ready, Hank? All right.
We now welcome on the man, the myth, the legend. It is our good friend, Coach Ed Oseron, national champion.
Are you the king of Louisiana now?

Speaker 1 I think Joe Burrow is. I think you just talked to the king of Louisiana.

Speaker 1 Okay, so, no, he's the prince. You're the king.
Like, do you get, I'm pretty sure you are the king of the state of Louisiana. Well, it's been great.
It's been great to be in Louisiana.

Speaker 1 I just love this state. Yeah, I think it's state law that you cannot legally purchase a beer for the rest of your life.
I think you're going to be paid for and taken care of from now on.

Speaker 1 Actually, you know what's going to be interesting is like 18 years from now, you're going to see a lot of college recruits coming into football, coming into NCAA football that are named Ed.

Speaker 1 Ed has been a name that has kind of dropped off.

Speaker 1 But I think you're going to see some LSU babies 18 years from now. It's big.
Ed is back. Are you? I mean, this is insane.
Have you had a second to be like, this is...

Speaker 1 If they they wrote this script about you, they wouldn't make the movie because it would be like, no, he can't actually go to LSU and win. Like, that's too not believable.

Speaker 1 Have you had a moment to be like, holy shit, this actually happened? Very thankful. Very thankful.
They couldn't have written a better script. But you know what?

Speaker 1 You have to be in a place like LSU to do what we're doing, to attract the great athletes, to attract the great coaches. It's the expectation of the school.
Yeah. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Have you had a chance to sleep yet? You know what? I slept about three hours last night. Really? Yeah, it wasn't wasn't bad.

Speaker 1 Got a little shut eyes. There you go.
Did you put a worm in your mouth before that? No worm, man. No worm.
I don't have to do that with this team. They're motivated.
It's crazy.

Speaker 1 I mean, it's like a well-ordered machine. That was what Joe was saying when he was just talking to me.
He said

Speaker 1 there was no rah-rah speech at halftime. There was no talking about it.
It was like, we're better than them. We just got to go play our game.
Execute.

Speaker 1 And, you know, we got to believe in our players, our coaches, and our fundamentals. Unbelievable.
Did you

Speaker 1 set your jaw last night? I set my jaw several times. Oh, yeah.
I said it at a half-time also. And that's probably the biggest one that I did.
And I sent a message.

Speaker 1 For people who don't understand what we're talking about, Coach O punches himself. Well, it's kind of just a little.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 Yeah,

Speaker 1 that was literally just punching yourself. Just to get things going just a little bit.
Like I said to remind you. I could knock myself out.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Do you ever get worried that you're going to knock yourself out? No.
Because you're so strong that you can beat yourself up? I kind of pull away at the end right there.

Speaker 1 Here's the deal.

Speaker 1 You know how you get in a fight, you got a big plan and everything, and all of a sudden the first bunch,

Speaker 1 all bets off, man.

Speaker 1 Then you kick in another gear. Yes.
And that's what I want our guys to kick in another gear mentally. Yeah, because the way the game started, you know, down early,

Speaker 1 the field position was a struggle. It was,

Speaker 1 you guys just didn't, unflappable. It was crazy.
No panic. Nothing.
You know, when you got a quarterback like Joe, you believe. You believe.

Speaker 1 And you got players like we got, the coaches, when you offer some scores and points, we just have to figure them out can we get joe to get like a master's degree or something yeah i'm all for it yeah i'm all for it my man

Speaker 1 get a doctorate yeah did you cry after uh what's that did you cry after the game no i didn't know i was good

Speaker 1 no not not not at all it hadn't hit yet uh that is going to be emotional uh i do believe when we get back to town and baton roof see tiger stadium yes no we always want to come back there 15 and all it just means a lot when i see that stadium people are saying like maybe one of the best if not the the best, champions ever.

Speaker 1 You guys beat five of the top eight teams at the end of the polls. I think we're in the conversation.
Incredible. For sure.

Speaker 1 Can I be honest, you look very put together right now, considering what time it is the day after winning a national title.

Speaker 1 You obviously got up early, took care of yourself.

Speaker 1 We literally rolled out of bed. Sorry, Coach.
We partied harder than you did.

Speaker 1 I feel bad.

Speaker 1 I don't do this. No, I feel bad.

Speaker 1 I feel bad, Coach. Oh,

Speaker 1 when we had Joe on, he told us, this was right after the Heisman, Ray Baker. We got to talk about Ray Baker.
Ray Baker, man. Ray Baker.

Speaker 1 Great friend of yours. Ray Baker.
He's got to be our friend. You got to spend time with him.

Speaker 1 If you don't spend time with him, he'll bake your ass.

Speaker 1 So Joe actually told us, I think this was off the air after we're done recording our podcast, but he said that one of the first times he met with you, you asked him, what do you think about Ray Baker?

Speaker 1 And Joe was like, he's a good player. Uh, he was kind of bullshitting his way through it, and then you walked out of the room.
And then he looked to his buddy, he was like, Who, who's Ray Baker?

Speaker 1 And he's like, Oh, that's what Coach O calls the sun. That big yellow ball in the sky, man.

Speaker 1 Those rays in the sky will bake your ass. Yes, they will.
Oh, man. All right.
Well, I know you got to get going. We appreciate it anytime.
Can we just do go tigers like 20 times in a row?

Speaker 1 I mean, every time I love it, do you get mad?

Speaker 1 I get mad when they don't ask, let you say go tigers. That's right.

Speaker 1 do you say it when you're walking in the like when okay so if they're interviewing you at halftime and they don't let you have that go tigers do you still say it yes I still say it yeah every time okay good that's good to know because I always get so upset when it's like wait you didn't let him say it put the mic back in front of him he needs to be able to say go tigers

Speaker 1 go tigers there you go one last last question have you figured out what you're gonna buy with your millions and millions of dollars that they're gonna pay you now because you are gonna be a restaurant

Speaker 1 contract contract. Contract for life.
We'll do it.

Speaker 1 Hey, y'all need to go talk to me, but I'm sure LSU will take care of me. And it's not about that, to be honest with you.
I'm going to put it away for my children. Good.
Good answer. We'll get it.

Speaker 1 We'll get you. Contract for life.
You want contract for life? You guys are going to get it. You want it? You want it? Coach for life.
We'll get it.

Speaker 1 Coach for life. You got it.
Coach forever. That will be the name.
That will be the head coach forever. We'll be on in front of your door.

Speaker 1 All right, Coach O. Congrats again.
Unbelievable. So happy for you.
Thank you for your friendship. You guys are phenomenal.
Go Tigers.

Speaker 1 Go Tigers.

Speaker 1 Those interviews are brought to you by Miundies.

Speaker 1 Love is in the air. Someone grabbed the Lysol.
Just kidding. Even though this is a made-up holiday, it's still really cute.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, your butt is cute, rhyming is dumb.

Speaker 1 Happy Valentine's Day, everyone.

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Not short season. Yet, unfortunately.
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Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 1 I catch my breath. Segments.
We just have two.

Speaker 1 One, we should new segment called Marshawn Lynch. That was awesome.
Take care of your monies, your bread, your chickens. Look after your chickens.
Mentals.

Speaker 1 That's it. That's the segment.
That's good. Money.
That's fucking awesome. Money, bread, chickens.
Chickens. Mentals.
I love it. Money, bread, chickens.
You gotta take care of your mentals. Okay.

Speaker 1 Have to. That's how I'm living my 2020 this year.
I love that. I love that.
He's the best. Marshawn Lynch is the king of speaking

Speaker 1 as effectively as possible using as few words as possible. Correct.
He's like Confucius. He can say...
I don't know if that's what Confucius' deal was, but it seems like

Speaker 1 Marshawn Lynch. Yeah, wait, he invaded...
What did Confucius do? Plato. He's an explorer.
Plato and Socrates. That's right.
He burned his boats. Confucius burned his boats.

Speaker 1 Imagine being like Plato or Socrates and just sitting around and just thinking deeper than everyone in the entire world and then having like a really sketchy little boys party in your fucking vomitorium.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I wasn't thinking about that. No, those are the things that I was just thinking like it would be a big flex back in the day to be known for just being super smart and just whoa bomb everything.

Speaker 1 Yeah, just walking around the streets and everything that you say blows somebody's mind. It's like Rick Riley right now.
It's crazy. Damn, I miss Rick.
I do miss him too.

Speaker 1 Okay, we gotta talk about the Astros. Wait, new segment.
Yeah. Bachelor talk for guys that don't watch The Bachelor.

Speaker 1 There was a bachelor last night at at the same time as the national championship game somebody decided to do that watch it no one no one watched it but i did i did find out that uh maddie got in trouble because

Speaker 1 she used a burner account to reply to a video of her date that she went on she used a burner account and she said uh skipping well she thought she thought she was using a burner account she said uh beautiful date maddie you are genuine and real and then she deleted it immediately because it was from her actual account come on on, Maddie.

Speaker 1 So there's nothing more genuine and real than tweeting from what you thought was a burner account that you're genuine and real. Yeah.
So real. She keeps it so 100.

Speaker 1 All right, the Astros cheated. And I was reading about it this morning.

Speaker 1 I don't really understand it because, again, it was a rough morning, but it seems like they kind of got off the hook in a weird way.

Speaker 1 So they fired their manager and general manager, but no players get anything. No players.
And it was... And they put the blame on the guy that's not even in the organization.
Right. And then they just

Speaker 1 definitely get fired.

Speaker 1 He's probably going to get fired. But it's crazy that they...

Speaker 1 Should we make

Speaker 1 clown t-shirts for whoever the commissioner of baseball is?

Speaker 1 Yes. Rob Manfred.

Speaker 1 We should.

Speaker 1 The craziest thing is that they basically admitted that they cheated, or the findings were they very much cheated during the postseason.

Speaker 1 It was kind of a player-run situation. And then

Speaker 1 the Astros' owner was essentially like, just suspend AJ Hinch and the GM, and I'll fire him, and then we'll move on. And that was it.
And now it's over. Yeah.

Speaker 1 So I don't really care, but if I were to care, I'd have a solid base to care on. My favorite part of the story is that AJ Hinch,

Speaker 1 not once, but twice, smashed the TVs that Coro was using to help cheat. Like he found that they put the TV back and he smashed it again.
Yeah. Yeah.

Speaker 1 I don't know what your job duties are as a manager, but I'm pretty sure that smashing televisions should be pretty high up on that list of day-to-day responsibilities. These are cheat lists.

Speaker 1 If today I'm going to smash at least one television. It's pretty great, though.
Like thinking that he saw it, he's like, not again. He just walks in there and just ruins it.
These fuckers.

Speaker 1 Instead of actually disciplining anybody. So Alex Cora, I'm not in favor of a lifetime ban, but I am in favor of hearing the term lifetime ban.
Oh, yeah, death penalty.

Speaker 1 It's awesome hearing Alex Cora has been issued a lifetime ban from baseball. Like, I don't think that he deserves it, but I deserve to hear that.
Yeah, and it gets

Speaker 1 old Petey back in the news, too. We talk about lifetime bans.
Yeah. I kind of like that.
That's true.

Speaker 1 Lifetime ban, there's nothing more satisfying than just like, when you read the words lifetime ban,

Speaker 1 it like gets you popping. It's very juicy.
It's an immediate endorphin hit. All right, anything else? I mean, this city is unreal.

Speaker 1 I don't know how anyone stays here for more than like, we came for two nights, and it feels like we've been here for a month. Feels like we've lived in New Orleans for a month.

Speaker 1 And that's just what this city does. I mean, it's unbelievable.

Speaker 1 I don't even know. It's unbelievable.
I had an awesome time here. It was incredible.
I can't wait. I was in the shower this morning.
Oh, yeah. That's right.
Yeah. Hank, you want to discuss?

Speaker 1 You want to tell us that story? Hank, Hank started telling the story. We got guys on shit.

Speaker 1 Before the podcast, we told him, don't say say this yeah save it for the show you shit yourself in the shower yeah i think it was like uh i think i talked i the first time i did i did break i did shit my like broke my virginity of shitting my pants last year yep but we remember we should actually make sure when was virginity i should say we should make sure you popped your own cherry we should uh celebrate that

Speaker 1 Year anniversary. And I was taking a shower this morning and I think I probably knew it was a shit, but I was just so lazy and I just thought it was a fart and then it just

Speaker 1 not a log but like it was it was assault it wasn't like it wasn't

Speaker 1 it was solid when it landed did it did it make a plop

Speaker 1 oh god when my alarm went off this morning I was I was very very drunk and I was just like what is going on hat fully clothed didn't didn't take off my shoes

Speaker 1 What a fucking night. Would have been much more comfortable in a jumpsuit.
What a weekend. It was one of those nights.

Speaker 1 I got back to the hotel, thought I opened up my laptop and I was like, maybe I'll peruse some pornography. Yeah.
And maybe I'll look up with myself. And I was like, you know what? It's 4.30.

Speaker 1 And you know what, BFT? You were too drunk to do this. I closed my laptop.
Extreme self-restraint.

Speaker 1 Pete was probably watching you. Yeah, because that's another thing.
Pete was watching this. Oh, and also, shout out.
You don't use your phone? Sometimes, but it's nice to have a bigger screen.

Speaker 1 Special shout out, the nap god, Bubba. Slept his way through multiple things this weekend.

Speaker 1 He was the nap god. We got back at Hank and I got back at 3.30 in the morning and all the equipment was in his room.
So I had to like beg the front desk.

Speaker 1 I was like, please let me have a key to this room because we have Coach O and Joe Burrow in the morning. As you were dabbing.

Speaker 1 As I was dabbing and they gave me a key and then we turn around to walk in and there's a guy, the other person at the front desk is on the phone and he's just like, yeah, he's not picking up.

Speaker 1 There's a fucking delivery guy with two huge bags of food. And they're like, this is going to Liam Crowley.
And we're like, oh, okay, we'll just take it. But we was just passed out.

Speaker 1 We just left the food.

Speaker 1 How did you even order? You seamless. I don't even know how you ordered.
It was crazy. It was so much food.
And you were so passed out.

Speaker 1 That's impressive.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Can I just say, like, we very rarely weaponize social media at this company. But I want to jump back real quick.

Speaker 1 I am doing the tryout for the XFL Defenders tomorrow, Wednesday. I'm going to be kicking in Houston, actually trying out for the team.
Chad Johnson is trying to dominate the social media XFL game.

Speaker 1 Just everybody tweet at Chad Johnson.

Speaker 1 Just let him know at Ojo Cinco that he cannot outkick Mr. 35 yards.
Get his ass.

Speaker 1 Tell him. Tell him.
Tell him. Because it's a mental warfare game right now, and I'm not going to lose that.
Tell on him. All right.
We'll see everyone on

Speaker 1 Friday. We'll see you on Friday.
We'll see you on Friday.

Speaker 1 We will still be doing Friday. We will be hungover on Friday still.
Fuck, man. I love you guys.
I'm still not looking forward to this hangover. I love you guys.
This was actually a fun show.

Speaker 1 I love you guys, too. It's only, we should do one of these every three years.

Speaker 1 Every time LSU wins every national title in New Orleans, we will do this. Yep.
If this was an every-episode thing, you would probably hate us.

Speaker 1 But this was fun. I love you guys.
Hank, don't poop yourself again. I should just give him Freddy.

Speaker 1 I don't know what

Speaker 1 to say, I'll take anyway.

Speaker 1 Today isn't my day to find you shy.

Speaker 1 So I'll be coming for your love of king.

Speaker 1 Take on me.

Speaker 1 Needless to say,

Speaker 1 I'll send it.

Speaker 1 But please don't let away.

Speaker 1 So I learned that life is okay.

Speaker 1 Say after me.

Speaker 1 It's no better to be safe than sorry.

Speaker 1 Say after me

Speaker 1 It's no better to be safe than sorry Say

Speaker 1 die

Speaker 1 on the day

Speaker 1 I

Speaker 1 know

Speaker 1 that I could

Speaker 1 true

Speaker 1 All the things that you say

Speaker 1 oh Just to play my worries away.

Speaker 1 You all think I've got to remember. Did you shine away?

Speaker 1 I'll be coming for you in your life.

Speaker 1 Did you shine away?

Speaker 1 I'll be coming for you in your life.