Live From New Orleans, NFL Divisional Round Recap + National Championship Preview With Stanford Steve

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Speaker 1 On today's part of my take, we are live from New Orleans for the national championship game. The big easy.
The big breezy. We are here sitting in a hotel room.

Speaker 1 We have Stanford Steve, our good friend who stopped by. He knows more college football than anyone in America.
He tells us how Monday night's game is going to go.

Speaker 1 But before we do that, we have to recap all of the weekend. Crazy.

Speaker 1 This might be one of the best playoffs we've ever had. It was insane.
Remember, last week, it was even better, you could say.

Speaker 1 But we thought that this week might suck because the first week was really good. Turns out football is just awesome.
Crazy. No matter what week it is.
Crazy, crazy games. We got some boomers for you.

Speaker 1 We got some who's back. When cool, creamy ranch meets tangy, bold buffalo.
The hole is greater than the sum of its sauce.

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Speaker 1 Okay,

Speaker 1 let's go.

Speaker 1 No place to hang out or washing.

Speaker 1 and then again

Speaker 1 all on the song. Oh no, we're gonna rock down to Elo Trick Avenue and then we take it higher.

Speaker 1 Oh, we're gonna rock down to Elo Trick Avenue.

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Speaker 1 divisional round

Speaker 1 In the big bell bottom home of the catch, Jimmy Jimmy Coco Puff, Jimmy Jimmy, yeah, led the 49ers against the NFC Norse Minnesota Vikings. Tevin, I'm a cold man,

Speaker 1 ran for 105 and two scores as Kendrick Bourne Identity sniped another score for the Niners offense.

Speaker 1 DeForest Bill Buckner had big balls between his legs and Nick Cannon Bosa was wild and out as the Vikings O-line hung their quarterback out to dry, more than a high-profile inmate at the Manhattan Correctional Facility.

Speaker 1 Cue the sex boats, Fred Smoot, because the Vikings will be home for another long, cold winter. Niners 27, Vikings 10.
Whoop, whoop, whoop, whoop, hop!

Speaker 1 Some spread. In Baltimore, it was the Derrick Henry Show yet again.
Tractor Cito. He's in his bag like Ranch Doritos.
Get under his skin like he's mosquito. Make Coach Freebook cut off his pee-hole.

Speaker 1 Tractor Cito. The Baltimore Ravens hit the lights and said, let's get Lamarted in here.
But wide receiver Sneed was more like Will I Ain't.

Speaker 1 Marlin's man Humphrey made a spectacle out of himself after the game, calling his own team chokers. I love when girls wear chokers, boom.

Speaker 1 Terrell Casey Anthony got away with murder, but still ended up looking hot as he sacked Lamar Jackson from, from, from the University of Louisville.

Speaker 1 Hey, hey, get Darn Revelle out of here before he makes someone kill themselves. Titans 28, Ravens, 12.
Some spread

Speaker 1 in Kansas City. A wild one broke out as the Texans got off to a 24-0 lead, and surely Bill O'Brien won't blow this one Tiege.

Speaker 1 Sherlock Patrick Mahomes and his assistant Deshaun Watson were trying to solve a mystery of which team was going to choke harder.

Speaker 1 Travis Scott Kelsey went dicko mode, dipping his big old balls into Bill O'Brien's teacup chin. The stadium ran out of Mrs.

Speaker 1 Doubt fireworks after Damian Robin Williams took a laughable stand-up piss on the Texans' defense.

Speaker 1 Throw the Texans' second half performance in the Astros' trash can because because this season is over. Chiefs 51.
Texans 31.

Speaker 1 We finish in the

Speaker 1 tundra. We're in a touching tribute to my good friend Neil Purt.
The Packers emphasize the need for a strong rushing performance. Devontae Adams Sandler and Aaron Sloppy Jones.

Speaker 1 Slop Sloppy Jones had Marshawn Lynch Ladyland singing a different tune. Pleat Carroll folded like a cheap pair of khakis, punting the ball away to Aaron Rodgers.

Speaker 1 And as the old saying goes, it's hard to beat the Packers and the rest in Lambeau Field. Packers 28, the Seattle Ross Seahawks 23.
All right. Divisional round in the books.

Speaker 1 Holy shit, what a wild weekend. We had upsets.
We had maybe the craziest game ever between the Chiefs and Texans just in terms of scoreboard. I mean, that was a, come on, Hank.
That was a crazy game.

Speaker 1 We're going to do it all. It was very crazy.
Hank,

Speaker 1 they were down by 24 points. Name another comeback.
That's as impressive as that.

Speaker 1 24 points is as good as it gets. PFT didn't finish where the team won by 20.

Speaker 1 Hmm. Can't think a long time.
Crazy. Big swing.
All right, so we're going to start, though, with the first game of the weekend.

Speaker 1 By the way, we are in New Orleans. Welcome to New Orleans, boys.
We're in the hotel room right now. We did not build a tent this time.
Nope.

Speaker 1 So I think that there's probably not, there wasn't enough echo to necessitate construction of a fort. Yes.
So yeah, we're just raw dogging it in the hotel. Hanging out.

Speaker 1 We have Stanford Steve coming up. He came and joined us.
He knows everything about college football. He's going to give you some winners for tonight's huge game.
We'll be at the game.

Speaker 1 Come say hello, but probably not because it's like a crazy expensive ticket, so it's really hard to get into. Yeah, not to brag.
Shout out SeatGeek, though, for SeatGeek, hooking us up.

Speaker 1 Also, I know that I said a couple weeks ago is quitting smoking, but we also said in that podcast,

Speaker 1 not counting New Orleans. So I'm allowed to smoke this.
Okay, so we're allowed to smoke. We'll see everyone out there.
Come say hello for real.

Speaker 1 Maybe we'll tweet where we're at tomorrow if any AWLs are in New Orleans. We'd love to say hi.

Speaker 1 Niners, Vikings. Let's first do something, PFT.
Let's get something out in the open here on the table. I was right about the Vikings.
Well, that, too.

Speaker 1 I was going to say, I don't think this was all Kirk Cousins' fault. I'm not going to sit here and do the lazy Kirk Cousins stinks.
He can never win a big game.

Speaker 1 He good, but his offensive line was worse. And I'm not going to put all the blame on Kirk Cousins.
That's big, right?

Speaker 1 Well, it's a good thing that there are two people on this podcast because I am going to go. Okay, so it will be a little good cop, bad cop.
Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 1 Now, you weren't going to say that Kirk Cousins can't win a big game and he can't deliver when he's the only part of that offense that needs to click.

Speaker 1 I'm not going to say, you're not going to say, excuse me,

Speaker 1 that the offense got too conservative because you don't trust Kirk Cousins to be the quarterback of your team. Well, okay.

Speaker 1 So to me, this game was way more about the Niners defense than Kirk Cousins like screwing up royally and making, you know, like he had no time. He got sacked six times.
There was no one open. And

Speaker 1 you know what? If anything, if you saw Richard Sherman after the game, he said that Kirk Cousins throws a very catchable ball. He complimented him.
He said, thank you for that, Kirk.

Speaker 1 The interception that I had, it was extremely easy, and the ball just stuck in my hands because you throw a tight spiral.

Speaker 1 That's why James Winston, it's actually a good sign that he throws so many interceptions because cornerbacks suck at catching the football. It has to be like a perfect spiral for them to catch it.

Speaker 1 This is though Kirk Cousins, like

Speaker 1 you know, we always try to not rate Kirk Cousins, but like, oh, is he good? Is he bad? He plays good sometimes. He is bad.

Speaker 1 Rate. Okay.

Speaker 1 Yeah, yeah. We try to rate Kirk Cousins.

Speaker 1 But he falls into the classic, like he's a quarterback who's good if everything else is perfect and their O-line is not perfect. Right.
And they got eaten alive. And the defense of the

Speaker 1 defensive line,

Speaker 1 if you're able to get pressure using four people on any quarterback in the NFL, that's huge. You can beat a lot of really, really good teams by doing that.

Speaker 1 Not to brag what we called that with Warren Sharp when we said that the Niners are not going to have to blitz much and they can still beat the fuck out of the Vikings, and that's exactly what happened.

Speaker 1 It's interesting because

Speaker 1 this was a chess match between, what's his name,

Speaker 1 Stefansky, the new coach of the Browns. Yes.
It was between Stefansky on offense. He was a coordinator for the Vikings.
And then Salah, the defensive coordinator for the Niners.

Speaker 1 And the loser has to coach the Browns as punishment. Yeah, that's great that the Browns are like, well, you know, I was reading reports and it was like Jimmy Haslam wanted his coach now.

Speaker 1 He didn't want to wait until after the Super Bowl. It's like, okay, that's fine.

Speaker 1 But the two coaches you were deciding between went head-to-head, their units, head-to-head on Saturday, and the Niners' defense won. in deciding fashion.

Speaker 1 Like easily kicked the fuck out of the Vikings. And again, the Vikings' offensive line is very bad, but that wasn't even close.

Speaker 1 Listen, when you're the Cleveland Browns, you can't afford to give up two more weeks

Speaker 1 to wait to hire the right coach. Go recruit.
It's a win now. The Browns franchise is built around immediate success.

Speaker 1 Well, and not only that, but like when you have the institutional foundation of the Browns, you need to make sure that you turn the page as quickly as possible because now that Stefanski is the head coach of the Browns, the clock is ticking of when should we fire him?

Speaker 1 Right.

Speaker 1 Like you need to start that right now. Yeah, after the second

Speaker 1 Steelers. Yeah, you cannot wait much longer.
Okay, so the other part of this game, I actually credit to Kyle Shanahan. Not only I think he's, I think his logo is getting smaller on his head.

Speaker 1 Oh, definitely. I think he's doing that to fuck with everyone, and it's hilarious.

Speaker 1 We're on to you because it seems like it gets smaller and smaller until if he's in the Super Bowl, it's just going to be like a small miniature logo, a dot, right?

Speaker 1 It's a QR code that you have to scan with your phone on the TV, and then it'll take you to the 49ers logo

Speaker 1 on Google Images, which you can purchase. Yes, yeah.

Speaker 1 So he basically, uh the start of the game jimmy g was first first career playoff start looks a little shaky and he's like hey you know what i'm not gonna do Let Jimmy G

Speaker 1 in his first career playoff game, which of course he's not gonna look like a season pro and he wasn't bad. He had that one bad interception.

Speaker 1 He's like, I'm just gonna pound the rock and beat the fuck out of them with the run game.

Speaker 1 And that's exactly what he did in front of Mike Shanahan, who was sitting there ear to ear in his luxury suite being like, this is awesome. My son has done it.
Yeah, Shanahan looked so, so happy.

Speaker 1 Between him and Mike Zimmer, it was like the battle of whose face looks more like leather. And Mike Shanahan looks really good for an old, tanned, leathery man.

Speaker 1 He looks better than he's looked in the last several years. I think he's very proud of Kyle not choking away a Super Bowl in the last couple years.
Yes.

Speaker 1 But Kyle's play calling was really good in this game. I agree with you 100%.

Speaker 1 The Vikings, they just got really conservative with it. It's like

Speaker 1 they coached scared from an offensive standpoint, and it allowed the 49ers' defensive line to pin their ears back, which is probably my favorite piece of analysis.

Speaker 1 It's saying these guys are going to pin their ears back, right? They can go after them and get after the quarterback.

Speaker 1 And there was nothing that the line could do once they fall behind and they're in obvious passing situations. They were shit out of luck.
Yeah, and that's going to be a theme for the whole weekend.

Speaker 1 I feel like we can point to pretty much every coach in the losing side and be like, you kind of turtled a little bit. You turtled a little bit.
You took chances where it's like

Speaker 1 you should have tried to step on their throat. Oh, the Vikings didn't have a chance to step on their throat.
But

Speaker 1 to win a playoff game on the road, especially as a pretty big underdog, which a lot of these teams were, you have to play flawless and you have to take those one or two chances where it's like, yeah, you know what?

Speaker 1 We're going to try to fuck them up right now and not worry about the repercussions. And the Vikings, that situation never got there, but I agree with you.
It was a conservative game plan.

Speaker 1 And Mike Zimmer, I don't know. The Vikings are so weird.
They're just going to do this again next year.

Speaker 1 And there'll be a moment during the season where everyone will be like, watch out for the Vikings.

Speaker 1 They might win a playoff game and eventually eventually they're going to get exactly where they are every single time with Kirk Cousins. Right.
This is their ceiling. Yeah.

Speaker 1 And it's a pretty good ceiling. I mean, you made the divisional round of the playoffs.
You won a road playoff game in New Orleans, which is difficult to do in the dome.

Speaker 1 Like, that's a pretty good season, all in all, for Vikings fans. Yes.
Right. You should be happy with this kind of.

Speaker 1 A special shout-out before we go to the next game. I love the Niners' colors.

Speaker 1 And all the throwback clips they can use for the Niners. Yes.
A big history guy. Love whenever they bring that up.

Speaker 1 I mean, it kind of sucks that Candlestick is just an empty lot now. Because he's like, come on, why can't that be? They have to go all the way to Santa Clara.

Speaker 1 But even the end zones, like next week, when it's Packers 49ers, it's going to be like, damn, is it the 90s? Like, it's great to see those colors in prime time in big games. The end zones are awesome.

Speaker 1 The old saloon letterings. Yeah, the saloon.
I fucking love it. I like it when they use a lot of the gold from the 49ers color scheme.

Speaker 1 Those old starter jackets that were just like mostly gold, shiny, reflective. Yeah.
These are sick as hell. Get Bob Weir out there to do the new national anthem.
Let's do the whole fucking.

Speaker 1 Get John Candy to stand in the front row. Love it.
Or wherever John Candy's body in the front row. He's a hero of mine.

Speaker 1 At the 50-yard line. Have Jimmy G be like, oh, is that John Candy? Yes.
And Jimmy G looking hot as ever. Yeah, that's true.
Are we going to have

Speaker 1 a pretty hot lineup of coaches in

Speaker 1 the NFC Championship game? Matt LaFour and Andrew. Cooler and Kyle Shanahan.
Hmm. Yeah.
Pretty hot. Although some would say Andy Reid, Mike Vrabel,

Speaker 1 way hotter.

Speaker 1 Way, way hotter. Those guys just, instead of a handshake, they're just going to bump each other's bellies.

Speaker 1 Those are men with a capital E.

Speaker 1 All right. Next game.

Speaker 1 The shocker. The shocker.
Two in the pink.

Speaker 1 One in the stick. What, Hank? What were you going to say?

Speaker 1 Were you going to say something?

Speaker 1 The Ravens are fill in the blank. The Ravens are.
They're not the F word. They're not the F word.

Speaker 1 But what we're seeing here, and I believe I called this about a month and a half ago, Lamar Jackson is a very good quarterback, right?

Speaker 1 He played really well. He's the MVP of the league this year.

Speaker 1 But I said what we're going to see, if they lose their first playoff game this year, we're going to start to see the narrative unfold, which is he can't win it.

Speaker 1 He's Justin Verd.

Speaker 1 He's LaMustin Jacklander. Wait, is what many people are calling him? Is it a narrative when your own team, when your own player says it? Marlon Humphrey said, We are chokers right now.

Speaker 1 Like that, the Ravens. Listen, I'm not going to sit here and be like, wow, I should have trusted my gut when I said they were frauds because they won 14 games.

Speaker 1 They were the best team in the regular season. They have the MVP, all that.
But holy shit, was that a fucking inexcusable loss at home where they just looked terrible?

Speaker 1 And I know Lamar Jackson had a million yards, but I actually don't blame it all on him because it felt like the Ravens panicked when they went down. And, like, how many times are they going to run

Speaker 1 empty backfield when, like, all season long they were fucking everyone up? That's the stupidest thing you could ever do. Lamar Jackson ran the ball 20 times.
He threw it 59 times.

Speaker 1 That's the stupidest thing you could ever do. That's crazy.

Speaker 1 To take your quarterback who's uniquely talented at being a dual threat and then eliminate the entire possibility that he's going to carry the ball and run with it. And now,

Speaker 1 we shouldn't, like, I'm not, we're bearing the lead because the Titans played a perfect game. Correct.
Their defensive plan was so perfect.

Speaker 1 They were basically like the one thing Lamar Jackson struggles with is throwing it out outside the hash marks, and they made him do it all night.

Speaker 1 And they made him, like, when he ran, it wasn't going to be for huge, huge yards. They made him stand in the pocket a lot of the time and throw the ball.
They were, that was a perfect game plan.

Speaker 1 And they did the fucking Bill Cower, which I love. Whenever you get the ball past the 50-yard line, throw that fucking deep pass.
Usually Bill Cower would have like Heinz Ward throw it or

Speaker 1 throw it to Heinz Ward. But when they get when the Ravens had that fourth and one, they get stopped on the fourth and one, and then they immediately turn around.

Speaker 1 The Titans throw it deep with Air Tannehill, who now has, I think those were all his yards yesterday. Yeah, he has a total of what, 166? 160 yards total in two playoff wins.
But guess what?

Speaker 1 It doesn't matter because the greatest thing we ever did was three months ago becoming a Tractor Cedo podcast.

Speaker 1 And that guy, I'm running out of things to say about him because he is so so fucking good. He's so goddamn good, and he's so hard to tackle.

Speaker 1 And it's like it he also doesn't seem to get tired when they were given the ball like 40, like in his high school career, there were several games where they gave him the ball 50 times in a game.

Speaker 1 They could give him the ball, how many rushing attempts did he have? Like 30? Yeah, he never seems to get tired. He just like looks at everyone else.

Speaker 1 He's like, I know, however tired I am, the other guys are going to be twice as tired because they have to try to tackle me.

Speaker 1 He has 64 carries for 377 yards in the two playoff games. It's a lot.
It's insane. He's the first player ever to average over 180 yards in their first two playoff games.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 The knock against him is sometimes he makes the difficult throw, though, and he doesn't take the open receiver. So he had the jump-pass touchdown.
Marcus Mariota was wide open. In the pity package.

Speaker 1 Yeah, if you're going to use him in the pity package, you could at least throw him the ball if there's nobody covering him.

Speaker 1 It'd be a nice thing to do because that way he feels like he's part of this. And then after the game, did you see Vrabel dapping everybody up? Yes.
And the very sad dap that he gave to Mariota.

Speaker 1 It's like, hey, I know this this isn't ideal for anyone. Yeah, it's kind of awkward.
Tannehill isn't really doing, like, Tannehill has been phenomenal in the regular season.

Speaker 1 He hasn't, he's doing just enough. He's doing, yeah, he's, he's doing the Terry Bradshaw.
He's just throwing it just enough yards to win Super Bowls.

Speaker 1 I love the Titans because it gives hope for everyone out there who doesn't have a franchise quarterback and can do the dumb brain old school meatball.

Speaker 1 All we need to do is run the ball and play defense.

Speaker 1 Because all we've heard about the last five years is it's a quarterbacks league sean mcvay all these guys like the young guys everyone had a beer with sean mcve as a head coach they're airing it out everyone's gonna throw for fucking 60 touchdowns and then the titans come in and win two road playoff games throwing for 160 yards and just running it right down your fucking dick hole yeah no they it's awesome it's like i'm pumped up just saying it right now running backs are back that's gonna be the next take that we have is like are we seeing the pendulum swing because there's one really outstanding running back, Derrick Henry.

Speaker 1 We're going to see some general manager like draft a running back in the top five. I said that during the game.

Speaker 1 I was like, have the Titans revolutionized offensive football by having a 240-pound guy run a 4-5-40?

Speaker 1 You're going to see like the Bengals seriously consider drafting a huge fat, like an actual overweight running back. Brandon Jacobs is coming back in the league.

Speaker 1 Yeah, is this almost like a Derrick Henry type guy that you might see out there? No, Tractor Sito is one of a kind. He's one of a kind.
He's not an assembly line tractor.

Speaker 1 He was handcrafted by someone's sweaty dad in their garage. This is a one-of-a-kind dude.

Speaker 1 Isn't it great to like, it's one of those things, I'm trying to think about, like, it doesn't happen in basketball anymore because basketball, the three-pointers, like, it used to be, you know, if you just get in the post,

Speaker 1 you can man up a team and like take them down.

Speaker 1 In hockey, you know, if you get that hot goalie in baseball, starting pitching, if you have that ace starting pitcher, they can just shut down the other team.

Speaker 1 It's nice that in football, you can still be like, hey, if you have like a run game, and again, there's no run game like Derrick Henry's run game, but if you have a run game like this,

Speaker 1 you can still beat anyone. I saw a stat, PFD, by the way, which is crazy.
You ready for this?

Speaker 1 Yeah, this is a stat that basically says scoring points is bad and you should actually be bad on offense, which means Mitch Trubisky actually, Sneaky is a franchise quarterback.

Speaker 1 The 12 highest scoring teams in NFL history have zero championships. There you go.
Zero. That's good enough for me.
Zero championships. Scoring points is bad.
You do not want to score points.

Speaker 1 A couple reasons why.

Speaker 3 Saints, 2009?

Speaker 1 The Saints 2009 are...

Speaker 1 No, they weren't one of the top 12. So here are the top 12 teams all time.
2013, Broncos. They lost to the Seahawks in the Super Bowl.
2007 Patriots. That's a 16-0 team.
Kansas City last year.

Speaker 1 Green Bay in 2011 when they went 15-1. Patriots in 2012, Minnesota, the famous Randy Moss and Chris Carter year when they went 15-1 and lost Morton Anderson.

Speaker 1 The Saints in 2011, the Skins in 1983, the Falcons when they lost to the Patriots, the Rams' greatest show on turf when the Patriots beat them. This year's Baltimore Ravens, last year's LA Rams.

Speaker 1 So if you score points, you actually are putting your team in a bad spot.

Speaker 1 You want to actually be inept on offense and just play good defense, punt the ball as often as you can, and you can maybe luck into a Super Bowl.

Speaker 1 Well, here's Frank Fraber was a part of like seven of those games. Yeah, he was.
That's true. Yes, he was.
It is true. Really, anyone that was on the Patriots in that time span.
Yeah, but it's crazy.

Speaker 1 It's like the stat, like, no, you know, like, number one, like, best wide receiver in the league has a Super Bowl

Speaker 1 in the last 20 years. You don't learn how to win ugly.
That's the thing. You score a shitload of points.
You have the MVP stat. There's been no MVP that's won a Super Bowl in the last 20 years.

Speaker 1 Here's a crazy stat.

Speaker 1 Here's another crazy stat. It was the fourth time that the team with the most rushing yards in the entire league went up against the league's leading rusher in the postseason.

Speaker 1 All four times the league's leading rusher won the game. See, this is what you need a bell cow.
These games.

Speaker 1 This is the return of the bell cow back.

Speaker 1 These games are what the rest of the NFL, all the fans out there who don't have a team in the tournament, these are the type of games that you can sit back and be like, oh, we're not that far away.

Speaker 1 You actually don't need a really good quarterback to score points.

Speaker 1 Like, it's just, it's, and of course, all of what I'm saying is stupid and makes no sense because, in reality, it's obviously better to have Lamar Jackson than not have him.

Speaker 1 But you can go to sleep tonight being like, hey, you know what's good? Not scoring points.

Speaker 1 But also, yeah, Ryan Tannehill probably playing with a little extra edge because he was a wide receiver in college. Nobody asked him to try out at wide receiver for the NFL.
Like, what is he?

Speaker 1 Chopped liver as an athlete. True.
He probably had a little bit of that extra motivation going on. How happy is Bill Polly in after this game? How happy are the Lamar haters?

Speaker 1 Bill Polly took off his khakis real early in this game. Of course, he wears a second pair of khakis underneath, but he took his pens

Speaker 1 and then diapers and then another pair of khakis. And then

Speaker 1 he took his first pair of khakis off real early on in this game.

Speaker 1 It's crazy that people can't like I, and I, you know,

Speaker 1 it's actually not crazy because it's Twitter and everything has to be black and white here, and no pun intended, but it's like Lamar Jackson is a great quarterback.

Speaker 1 He's an MVP, but he also is not a complete, like, he's not a finished product when it comes to passing. It's not crazy to say, like, the Titans had a great game plan.

Speaker 1 They're like, we're going to make him throw outside and not be able to run it all over us. And guess what? It worked.

Speaker 1 And, of course, the Ravens' defense, you know, had mistakes as well, but the Titans just need all the credit in the world because they're playing great football and Mike Frabel might not have a penis after this.

Speaker 1 Well, so that's another hot topic of debate is whether or not Mike Vrabel said he would cut off his penis after they won a Super Bowl or he would cut his penis off in order to win a Super Bowl.

Speaker 1 So like we don't know.

Speaker 1 He might be like a Kindle below the belt because it looks like they're going, well, they're certainly going to have a chance to get to the Super Bowl. But yeah, I don't know.
Maybe he already cut.

Speaker 1 We need to study some tape on the sidelines and see if there's a bulge. in his crotch where his dick should be.
No, we need someone to just go dick tap him.

Speaker 1 Yeah, just well, no, because you can hit him in the, we know he's got nuts. Yeah.
He coaches like he's got balls. Yes.
But we need to find out if he has a PP. Yeah.

Speaker 1 In conclusive.

Speaker 1 So in conclusion of this game, Ravens,

Speaker 1 listen, I want a little bit of credit for not trying to run up the score here. They're not frauds.
They're not frauds. But they played fraud.

Speaker 1 But they got exposed.

Speaker 1 They got exposed. That's a good way to put it.

Speaker 1 I think if you're a Ravens fan, you're sitting there like, well, that fucking sucks. I mean, you...

Speaker 1 It was an incredible season, but now the doubts start creeping in because you realize, like, all this is so fleeting. And next year, who knows?

Speaker 1 I want to know what Hank's thinking right now because he gave me this look when you said, right now, the doubts are creeping. I want to know how this relates to the Patriots.

Speaker 1 I think you've got to take.

Speaker 3 Well, it's not, if you're a Ravens fan, it's not fleeting. It's like your quarterback's 23.
He had an MVP season.

Speaker 3 It's more, it's, again, like I said before, you guys laughed at me when I was like, Lamar hasn't proved it in the playoffs.

Speaker 3 Peyton Manning, another MVP caliber quarterback, couldn't get it done in the playoffs. It might not just be like that he has weaknesses in his game.
He's clear the MVP.

Speaker 3 He just might not be able to get it done in the playoffs.

Speaker 1 Exactly like LaMustin Jacklander. He's no, when I say he's not weaknesses in his game, again, he's the MVP.
I'm just saying the Titans game planned very well for him and he still put up crazy yards.

Speaker 1 And of course, they drove the ball. They just weren't able to finish drives, which obviously that matters a lot.
I'm just saying the fleeting part to me is

Speaker 1 there are certain years where it feels like that is your year for your team.

Speaker 1 To not win in those years like you just never know yeah i mean the capitals had several of those years last year i think the bears i was like this is the and look at they might be like literally back to square one rebuild every blow everything up but i do think there's something to be said there saying it during the broadcast where it's like lamar spent the entire offseason like he was super rattled by how bad he was in the playoffs that's all he was thinking about like he probably overthought the playoff game too much those fourth and ones man they were so easy for them all year and then they get in there and it doesn't happen and it's like what the fuck I actually think having Ingram being hurt, it took a big toll because

Speaker 1 he didn't have the confidence to hand the ball off to his running back on a lot of those read option plays he was making. He was trying to do it all on his own.
It wasn't working out.

Speaker 1 I was actually thinking about these fourth and ones. Do you think that it affects the lifespan of your fan base as a coach if you go for it on fourth down more often?

Speaker 1 Like, are you giving people heart attacks?

Speaker 1 I'll bet you some people have died because of this reckless attention that he's paid to statistics. Yes, I'd agree with that.

Speaker 1 Another crazy stat about this game: the Titans have only kicked one field goal since week nine.

Speaker 1 What? Yeah.

Speaker 1 One field goal since week nine.

Speaker 1 Yeah, yeah, yeah. They've had like 40 touchdowns, like 43 touchdowns, or something crazy like that since then.
So

Speaker 1 they were 44% on field goals for the year, for the entire year, and now they just don't have a kicker. Which is like Vrabel just being like, you know how, what's his name?

Speaker 1 The old explorer, was it Cortez? Confucius.

Speaker 1 Yeah, Confucius said, we're going to burn our boats so that we don't have anything to go back on. Vrabel is like, we're going to always go for it on fourth downs.

Speaker 1 We're going to score touchdowns. And to ensure that there's no other options, I'm not even going to have a kicker.
Damn.

Speaker 1 My dad had an original Mike Greenberg's dumb rule like 20 years ago where after every playoff game, any sport, you get to pick one player from the team you beat and bring them on the roster.

Speaker 1 Absorb them? Yes. Justin Tucker.
You don't think they... The Titans would take him in a second.
You think they go Justin Tucker over Lamar Jackson? I think they probably.

Speaker 1 And Tan Tanhill fits in their office. Yeah, why would they do that? He fits in their office, which doesn't require the quarterback.
Yeah, right, exactly. Lamar Jackson would be a waste.

Speaker 1 Yeah, he would try to throw the ball.

Speaker 1 And that would be crazy. You don't want to do that.
It would also make Mark Ingram very, very jealous. Oh, man.
That is a crazy stat. So

Speaker 1 insane game. Big rust.
The Titans are big rust. Huge rust.
And I think we technically own big trust now

Speaker 1 because it didn't work.

Speaker 1 they need a new saying. You can't bring that saying right now.

Speaker 1 So we have it.

Speaker 1 We're the Big Trust. Big Trust podcast.
Yeah, Big Trust podcast. Hank said Big Sus last time.

Speaker 1 That was good. That was really good.
All right, before we get to the next game, the craziest game.

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Okay, the crazy game. The nuts game.
Holy shit. Chiefs, Texans.

Speaker 1 I still don't really understand how this happened. The

Speaker 1 Houston Texans were up 24-0. They were up 24-0 in the first quarter.
Actually,

Speaker 1 no, yeah, it was the end of the first quarter. They were up 24-0.

Speaker 1 They got given 14 of those points, too. Everything was going well for them.
The Chiefs were dropping passes. The Texans were blocking punts.
Everything was going well. Tyreek Hill muffed a punt.

Speaker 1 Travis Kelsey was screwing up left and right, and there was no hope whatsoever he was going to turn it around.

Speaker 1 The

Speaker 1 Kansas City Chiefs went into half 28-24. They were down 24-0 in the first quarter.
They went into the half with a lead. They won the game by 20 points.
That's the first time that's ever happened.

Speaker 1 A team that was down by 20-plus, won by 20-plus.

Speaker 1 The game had everything, and I think we need to start.

Speaker 1 Okay,

Speaker 1 let's talk narratives real quick.

Speaker 1 Is the narrative, holy shit, Patrick Mahomes, we forgot how unbelievable he is, and yeah, the Texans' defense sucks, or is it Bill O'Brien, you cuck, you went, you turtled in the biggest moment?

Speaker 1 I think it's Bill O'Brien, the cucking of Bill O'Brien by his own brain. So, this happens with Bill occasionally.
He's not the, I don't think Bill's the brightest guy in the entire world.

Speaker 1 He's a perfectly fine coach, you can say, considering what happened to the Texans before he was there and what he's done with that team. Yep.

Speaker 1 It's a pretty good improvement over previous regimes, but he chases himself.

Speaker 1 chased he chases his own brain during games yes so he he kicked that field goal he gets so it's fourth and one they could have stopped they could have stomped on their throats they could have put the game away they score a touchdown great they get a first down there they continue that drive they could have broken their backs immediately and he didn't not only that but you are going to kansas city when you know that your defense cannot guard the chiefs for four quarters like you know that and and maybe the first quarter got in his head where he's like hey we can hang with these guys but you watched it the chiefs dropped the ball, easy drops on two consecutive third downs to start the game.

Speaker 1 So that's how that happens. You're not going to beat the Chiefs by kicking field goals.
You're not. So I don't understand why he doesn't go for a touchdown.

Speaker 1 There was like a feeling after those first couple drives when they had the drops. It was like, oh, this is just one of those days where nothing's going Kansas City's way.

Speaker 1 So I was like, maybe this will continue, which that's how I have to imagine Bill O'Brien was thinking when he decided to do that. But then he just fucked himself.

Speaker 1 And then when they faked the punt later, that was clearly Bill O'Brien chasing his own brain from earlier, being like, I should have been more aggressive earlier.

Speaker 1 So now I'm going to be aggressive and screw everything up.

Speaker 1 Andy Reid, to his credit, called a really good second quarter, perhaps the best offensive second quarter. Four touchdowns in the second quarter.

Speaker 1 That's the second time Patrick Mahomes has done that this season. He did it against the Raiders in like week six or whatever when he just went insane.

Speaker 1 Remember, we read those stats and it was crazy because it was like he scored four touchdowns in like six plays or some ridiculous run. They scored seven touchdowns in a row, possession-wise.

Speaker 1 It was insane what they did to the Texans' defense, which we all knew was suspect. But to have a 24-0 lead and have it turn, I don't even know if it's a choke because

Speaker 1 it happened so fast. Three minutes.

Speaker 1 It was so fast.

Speaker 1 But it wasn't like they were

Speaker 1 like,

Speaker 1 dang, it would be one thing if they held on to that lead all the way to the fourth quarter and it's like, oh, it's slowly bleeding away. Yeah.

Speaker 1 It was, if you had just missed, like, if you were just in traffic and you had missed the first quarter, you would have sat down and been like, the Texans never had a chance in this game.

Speaker 1 It was that crazy. They're like the Golden State Warriors.

Speaker 1 The Kansas City Chiefs are like the former third-quarter Warriors that would come out and they'd be down by like two points and then you blink your eyes and now you're down by 40. The Chiefs ran.

Speaker 1 That's what these Chiefs are like. They can score points quicker than any other offense in the entire league right now.
And so, like, they ran out of fireworks. They did.
They ran out of fire.

Speaker 1 Well, Andy Reid was blowing his nose. They ran out of fireworks.
That was better than fireworks.

Speaker 1 They ran out of fireworks. And Andy Reid's snot rocket into a Gatorade towel is 10 times better than any fireworks.

Speaker 3 This is poor preparation by their people. 50 points isn't that much.

Speaker 1 50 burger. I agree.
You've got to always be prepped for the 50 burger.

Speaker 1 The Texans are very much like the Vikings. Like, okay, so the Ravens lose, and if you're a Ravens fan, you're walking away saying, we have the MVP.
He's 23 or 24. Everything's looking up.

Speaker 1 We can build on this. Yeah, it sucks, but

Speaker 1 it will be okay in the long run. The Vikings and the Texans, you kind of are what you are.

Speaker 1 And I guess Deshaun Watson is obviously significantly better than Kirk Cousins, but until he has the offensive line,

Speaker 1 until there's any semblance of defense, you kind of are what you are that you are this type of team that can lose by 20 when you're being up 24-0. Can we just,

Speaker 1 I'd like to address something. It's been a real trend on the internet recently.
When a game gets good,

Speaker 1 everyone tweets out, this game is drunk. Yes.
This game is drunk. And let me clarify, the game's not drunk.
You're drunk. No, you're drunk.
You're just drunk. You're just drunk.

Speaker 1 And also, it's disrespectful to drunks to be saying that the game is drunk because it's like crazy.

Speaker 1 It should be a compliment to be like, this game is drunk. Whenever something good happens, it should be like, this is a nice drunk game.

Speaker 1 Also,

Speaker 1 like, maybe this is just the age talking here, but I would prefer a buzzed game. I don't want to be drunk.
I'd rather have like this game is, this game has a five-beer buzz.

Speaker 1 I'd like a nice day-drunk game. Yeah, this game.

Speaker 1 Not bomb.

Speaker 1 This game is five beer buzzed. Maybe you hit the vape pen and your boys are all kind of hanging out at the bar and everyone, the vibe is great.
Drunk. This game is chill.

Speaker 1 This game has caught a nice tasty. This game is golden hour.
Like the good,

Speaker 1 everything's going well. The right songs on in the jukebox.
It's that level. This is the God moment game.
Yeah, I don't want to puke on myself. Yeah, I'm guaranteeing you within the next week.

Speaker 1 Probably for the championship game, Ravel is going to hit a This Game is Drunk tweet. Yeah.
He's going to try to monetize. Oh, he for sure.

Speaker 1 Yeah, he probably trademarked it. Yeah, yeah, absolutely.
All right. So.
Also, is the Kansas City Wolf okay?

Speaker 1 Yeah. So he's banged it.
Yeah. Casey Wolf.
He was upset. I love the Wolf.
First of all, he's so good.

Speaker 1 Anytime you can get a mascot on a Segway, that's a winning combination right there.

Speaker 1 The way that he reacts to field goals that are made against the Chiefs, amazing.

Speaker 1 Also, the Casey Wolf, anytime you get a mascot that has like a pear-shaped body and he can move his hips like a hula hoop, yeah. Like Philly Fanatic and the Casey Wolf.
Love that.

Speaker 1 The googly eyes are a nice touch, too. Love that.
Love the Casey Wolf. So, Andy Reid now hosting an AFC championship game, back-to-back years.

Speaker 1 Can Andy Reid get back to the Super Bowl? I need it. I need it so bad.
Andy Reid in shorts all week in Miami, maybe a little suntan lotion on his nose.

Speaker 1 I don't know, like the Chiefs, if you're

Speaker 1 socks and stuff like that. It's crazy how bad this game started for the Chiefs and how it felt like it was going to be such a choke.

Speaker 1 And to have it turn like that, that's got to be an all-time feeling. Like, there was a fan who went viral because he left after the first quarter, which

Speaker 1 that guy fucking did it for attention.

Speaker 1 Shut up, that's not like a Miami Heat fan thing where he actually, like, if you leave in the first quarter of a divisional round game with that offense, you're just a tryhard who's trying to get attention.

Speaker 1 Right.

Speaker 1 Yeah, Andy Reid is going to be. Yeah, what's that, Hank? Oh, Greed.
Yeah. Yeah.
That's a loser.

Speaker 1 Andy Reid, Super Bowl. I'm just, I'm getting a whole vibe from it.
I'm getting a whole mood. You get a buzz vibe? I'm getting a buzz vibe.
Hank's shaking his head. No, he's going to tighten up.

Speaker 1 I don't know who to root for in that game.

Speaker 1 I will say that Roger Goodell is absolutely smashing the nut button on the prospect of a Kansas City Chiefs Packers Super Bowl rematch of Super Bowl I in the 100th year of the NFL.

Speaker 1 Doing a major stay woke on that one. If Roger Goodell would be the kind of guy to pull any strings behind the scenes, and I don't know if he is or not.
He already did tonight with the Packers.

Speaker 1 He already did with the Packers.

Speaker 1 Roger Goodell is absolutely going to try to engineer that. Yes, yes.

Speaker 1 Also, I did tweet, thanks for coming out, Chiefs. That was wrong.

Speaker 1 No, you weren't. You were saying, thanks for coming out.
Thanks for coming out. It was awesome and liked it, which I like that the Petty Wars.
If

Speaker 1 you come back in a game and you almost go and just scroll for the old text exposed, that has to be such a great feeling. Absolutely.
So look at all these people.

Speaker 1 But you were actually being sincere when you said it. You said, thank you for playing football.
Yes. It was good to see you play.
Yeah, I also did that to the Titans early in that game.

Speaker 1 There's times where I'm like, do I control how a football game goes with my idiotic tweets where I actually decide who's going to win a game after four minutes of football? Maybe.

Speaker 1 Well, if that were true, then the Seahawks definitely would have won. Yeah, fuck.
I tried my best. I tried my best.
All right, we're going to do that game. Before we do that, what's up, guys?

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Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 1 Let's talk about my Green Bay Packers. Fuck.

Speaker 1 From an ownership standpoint, this game delivered on

Speaker 1 probably 90% of what I wanted out of it. It's hard to beat the Packers and the refs.
Yeah, it is. It's hard to beat the Packers and the refs.

Speaker 1 And again, I'm not going to complain about the refs, but if I were to complain about the refs, that bullshit spot was bullshit.

Speaker 1 and that should have been reviewed, and they should have used common sense. Jimmy Graham didn't get a first down.

Speaker 1 The only big disappointment I had with this game is Aaron Rodgers' body language overall.

Speaker 1 If you don't look happy to throw for a completion and get a game-clinching first down, you don't deserve to have it.

Speaker 1 Did you see Coward bet on the uh Packers because Aaron Rodgers wore a hat to his press conference? He doesn't care about how his hair looks.

Speaker 1 Okay, yeah, I'll buy that. Colin Coward did.

Speaker 1 I thought Colin Coward was like, don't wear a hat. No, he he don't wear

Speaker 1 a hat that's not straighting going exactly.

Speaker 1 Yeah, but he had that take, but he also had the like Matthew Stafford wears a baseball cap. Backwards hat.
That's a

Speaker 1 big difference. Backwards hat.
I think just a ball cap in general. Okay, I got to straighten out my Colin Coward takes.
Listen, the Patterns deserve to win this game, whatever.

Speaker 1 But you know what I'm saying? Like Aaron Rodgers, he throws for that first down to Jimmy Graham at the end of the game. He's not even happy.

Speaker 1 He's depressed. He is depressed.
He's very depressed. He's doing so many commercials.

Speaker 1 You know what? That's why he probably keeps winning these playoff games. He wants to keep getting those free meals from the team.
Doesn't have to worry about a seamless account. Another

Speaker 1 takeout of health insurance. Exactly.
We're on to you, Aaron.

Speaker 1 Yeah, the Packers, I mean, the Seahawks can't put themselves in that type of hole. And of course, they come back because that's what, like, that was such a classic Seahawks.

Speaker 1 They're coming all the way back. I just don't understand

Speaker 1 Pete Carroll punting. And I know it's fourth and 11, but why,

Speaker 1 like, there's nothing worse, if you're a sports fan, to have your team punt the ball and never get it back. Yeah, we're going to give the ball to Aaron Rodgers.
Surely he won't put together a drive.

Speaker 1 Like, just go for it on fourth and 11. If you don't get it, you're still in the same exact spot.
I know field position, blah, blah, blah. It's a five-point game.

Speaker 1 If they kick a field goal, it doesn't matter. You still need a touchdown regardless.
So I ran the stats on it. You can do that when you have Russell Wilson.

Speaker 1 I ran the stats and the percentages on that play call. It turns out that you can't score the ball if you don't have the ball.
Correct.

Speaker 1 So when you're down by points, in order to get those points back, you have to possess it. So ipso facto, Pete Carroll probably should not have punched that ball.
Go Niners. Go Niners.

Speaker 1 And Aaron Rodgers is doing that thing now where he's back. Like he has not looked like old school Aaron Rodgers at times this year,

Speaker 1 but

Speaker 1 he has that thing where he third-down throws. He third-down throws where he's running around.
He's hitting Devontae Adams. He's hitting those broken plays.
They're winning ugly.

Speaker 1 Everything is staying alive for him. Hey, you know what? We don't talk about the fact that the Titans are in the AFC Championship game when

Speaker 1 they lost Matt LaFleur as the offensive coordinator. And their offense looks great.
That's true.

Speaker 1 We should start talking about that more.

Speaker 1 We can also talk about that. I'm not talking about the fact that I told people that if they subscribe, I won't be salt.
Can I just tell you,

Speaker 1 like, a way to soothe your own soul about this? You can just say, like, this isn't Aaron Rodgers' team. This is Aaron Jones' team.
Yes. He's got a running back that's giving him on his back.

Speaker 1 Yes, that's a good point. Marshawn Lynch, by the way, had it.
I hope this isn't it. It probably is because he doesn't really look like...
Maybe if he has a whole offseason,

Speaker 1 he'll be better. Two touchdowns.
He had two touchdowns. That's true.
He had 12 carries for 26 yards and two touchdowns.

Speaker 1 He is very, very good at getting the ball one yard out and just falling forward no matter what. Yeah, can they just leave? He's the best ever.
Yeah, so you get, yeah, exactly.

Speaker 1 Why wouldn't you always use him in that situation? They used the old saying for fullbacks that they used to do, like, do you want, do you need half a yard? He'll get you a yard.

Speaker 1 Do you need three yards? He'll get you a yard.

Speaker 1 They should make a rule that there's a 54th roster spot, and it's just the fun spot. So, like, Terrell Owens can come back.
Chad Otrocenco can come back.

Speaker 1 Marshawn Lynch can be on the Seahawks for the next 20 years and just run goal line. So just have like one extra spot on every NFL team.
Brett Favre. And it's just a fun spot.

Speaker 1 It has to pack. We are the commissioners of the fun spot.
You have to,

Speaker 1 each team has to send in notice of who they're going to use for that spot. Okay, let's run.
You will agree with it.

Speaker 1 Let's run a quick simulation of the remaining teams that you have in the playoffs right now. Yeah.
49ers, fun spot. Who's that guy?

Speaker 1 49ers, fun spot. Kaepernick, just for the takes.
Kaepernick, just for the takes. I love it.
Packers, fun spot. Favre.

Speaker 1 Favre, just so that he can get Aaron Rodgers' head, and then Aaron Rodgers can fall apart.

Speaker 1 Vince Young for the Titans. Yes, absolutely.
Vince Young would be awesome to just hang out.

Speaker 1 And then for the Chiefs, maybe have Tony Gonzalez get a ring. Yeah, it's not bad.
Why not? I'll take that one. Yeah, why not? Are any of the 49ers old quarterbacks? Yes.
Or throw away Alex Smith.

Speaker 1 Larry Johnson. Lamar Charles.

Speaker 1 Yeah. What? Jamal Charles.
Jamal Charles. Lamar Charles.
Lamar Charles. I don't know why I said Jamal Charles.
You just invented an awesome football. Lamar Charles.
Yeah, he's fun.

Speaker 1 Damn, that was a bad brain moment. All right, fun spot makes a good idea, though.
That's a good

Speaker 1 new Mike Greenberg's dumb rules. We should have one spot.
You have to send it into us, and we will let you know if it's allowed or not. Honestly, Herm Edwards on the Chiefs.

Speaker 1 Herm Edwards on the Chiefs would be fantastic. If the Ravens were still in it, have, well, no, Terrell Suggs is on the Chiefs.
Ray Lewis. Ray Lewis.
Flacco. That's why the Ravens lost this time.

Speaker 1 Flacco would have Flacco to put in in the second half. It would be great.
That would be fucking awesome. If it was the Vikings, put Randy Moss on there.

Speaker 1 You don't think Randy Moss could get a catch downfield? Without a doubt. And everyone would tune in, being like, when are they going to deploy Randy Moss? Yeah.

Speaker 1 Also, can we give a shout out to Fox and CBS for showing behind the scenes the Pro Football Hall of Fame giving spots to Bill Cower and Jimmy Johnson? Well, that was one of my who's backs.

Speaker 1 David Baker, the biggest man, the largest human being that's ever been created. He's 400 pounds.

Speaker 1 He weighs 400 pounds. He would be a king 400 years ago.
He would have been the king of all of Europe. Well, just by size.
He also just looks like Chris Berman.

Speaker 1 got into some DNA splicing factory with Emerald Lugasi. Yes,

Speaker 1 someone tweeted that he looks like a Dick Tracy villain, and it couldn't be more spot on. He would be 400 years ago, David Baker is the king of Europe

Speaker 1 and he dies at a very old age of 19. He's 6'9.

Speaker 1 He's 400 pounds. I think Florio tweeted something out about like he got arrested a while back because he was running for Congress and he wrote an illegal check to himself.

Speaker 1 He sweats through suits and also the Bill Coward.

Speaker 1 Yeah, we do.

Speaker 1 We absolutely do. The Bill Cower and Jimmy Johnson,

Speaker 1 the premise is he's sneaking up on them.

Speaker 1 The largest man that's ever been created is sneaking up on them like a tiny little mouse to tell them that they're going to the Pro Football Hall of Fame and then having them do alligator tears in front of everyone.

Speaker 1 He's one of those guys you can definitely smell before you see.

Speaker 1 He just smells like a leather and whiskey coming down the hallway. The craziest part about him is you see him and you're like, oh,

Speaker 1 he's president of the Pro Football Hall of Fame because he was probably like a Steelers offensive lineman in the 70s. No, he didn't play in the NFL.
He's just the largest man ever.

Speaker 1 Yeah, dude, I love him. And it's like the whole concept is like punked, but reversed, like a good version of punked.
You know what they should do?

Speaker 1 They should actually have him punk like Matt Hasselbeck. Go out and say, Matt, I've got some great news.
I'm here on set with you today. And then turn around and walk away.

Speaker 1 Yeah, or like go up to Dan Marino's Super Bowl week and be like, Dan, We've got you a Super Bowl ring. Just kidding.

Speaker 3 And then pull a fucking middle finger out of his pocket right in Dan's face he's such a jerk um all right let's do who's back and then we'll do a couple more ads and get to stanford steve uh hank who's back my who's back is anthony davis in chicago yeah he opted out uh so he's not like he that was a while ago he chose i know but today i feel like he chose he was going to go into free agency the summer chicago people got really excited and then he showed up to lambo today in a full packers dress

Speaker 1 and was like dapping up how is that possible i don't know he's a big packers he likes excellence he appreciates a man with good eyebrows, and Aaron Rodgers has pretty good eyebrows.

Speaker 1 It's one of those things where, like, if you're a Chicago fan,

Speaker 3 you could attest this big cap, but you see that he's opting out. You're like, oh, shit, opting out.
He's going to come home. And then you see him at Lambeau, full pack.

Speaker 1 I can look past it. Dapping up.

Speaker 1 Dapping up to Aaron Rodgers. It's got to be tough, though.
It's got to be like

Speaker 1 I can look past it.

Speaker 1 You know what really sucks? The Lakers are really fucking good. Right now.
Peeking together. But they didn't even have Anthony Davis and LeBron the other night, and they fucking smoked the thunder.

Speaker 1 And

Speaker 3 Kuzma was fighting for his job.

Speaker 1 But he's still out. He's gone.

Speaker 1 It's bad, though, because I saw that quote.

Speaker 1 Boyd Howard's fighting for his legacy. Kuzma's fighting for his job.
Rondo put up insane numbers. Hank, I'm putting in the tickler file.
Panic Button is in the backyard. It's sitting.

Speaker 1 It's actually right by the Citronella candles. We just finished a

Speaker 1 grill out. We forgot to bring it in, but it's sitting out there.

Speaker 3 Peeking too early. Okay.
My other who's back is Josh McDaniels, which is we talked about it earlier.

Speaker 1 That's right, yeah. Yes.
It's back in New England. Yes.
Yes. By the way, peaking too early is also back because of the Ravens.
They peaked way too early. Yep.
Rick Bettino. It's bad to peak too.

Speaker 1 You never come back. And you never want to be good.

Speaker 1 You want to go. That one good before everyone else is good.
Yeah.

Speaker 3 You need one slip up

Speaker 3 at the end of the season to refresh you.

Speaker 1 It's bad to score points. Ravens are not bad.

Speaker 1 It's week four. It's like they didn't know.
Yeah, they didn't know. You get shocked back to reality at some point.
This actually makes me think that, like, if,

Speaker 1 I don't know, the Cincinnati Bengals had snuck their way into the playoffs, they might have won it all. Like,

Speaker 1 they definitely didn't play good before the playoffs. Right.
They could have done it.

Speaker 1 So, yeah, McDaniels is back in New England. He brought his wife with him to his interview.
Kind of a beta move. Well,

Speaker 1 he's the coach of the team. She's the coach of the family.
Of the house. Yeah.
Apparently, they went out for lunch. Like, he went out for lunch at some country club with Haslam.

Speaker 1 He went out to lunch with him, but it was a guy's only place.

Speaker 1 So his wife had to go out to lunch. Stand and sit in the car with someone else.
Did he crack the windows for her? Probably. 1955? What is this restaurant? That's how Jimmy Haslam was.

Speaker 1 Jimmy Haslam was absolutely the answer to his coaching search. Yeah, so

Speaker 3 was it just like his house? Did they go to his house? And he was like, oh, like, no women.

Speaker 1 Josh McDaniels left a little

Speaker 1 left a note in the windshield, be like, don't worry, I left the air conditioning off for my wife.

Speaker 1 Don't break the window with a rock break glass

Speaker 1 all right who's your who's back my who's back of the week is the Espaniola Island tortoises they're back big time

Speaker 1 because they were down to extinction pretty much there were like three of them left yeah and then this one tortoise named Diego fucked the entire species back

Speaker 1 off the endangered species list Diego like two turtles no Die yeah he probably fucked two turtles but he fucked them a lot and now they're like 1200 tortoises back in the wild deep so far.

Speaker 1 So shout out to Diego, the capital D. Love Die Diego slanging that thing.
Love Diego. Turtles fuck.
I don't know how turtles fuck. They got that shell.

Speaker 1 That's probably why they always go extinct.

Speaker 3 You never seen turtles fucking?

Speaker 1 No. Hilarious.
Tortoises?

Speaker 3 There's some funny things.

Speaker 1 Yeah, these are some funny birds. I feel like they went viral recently.

Speaker 3 Yeah, they do like the hit.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Yeah.
Tortoises fucking like that. It must be really.

Speaker 1 It must be tough, though, because they got the shell, so you have to be like deedly accurate with that thing. Slide it in.
Heat-seeking missile. Do some research.
Okay,

Speaker 1 I'm going to do a lot of tortoise fucking research tonight. Yeah, Google that.

Speaker 1 All right, my who's back was David Baker, but it's also minor confrontations at the airport, which I love to get the juices flowing.

Speaker 1 I think, PFT, you were taking a piss, but I was telling Hank, I was sitting on the plane. We got middle seats, which that was an experience.

Speaker 1 I'm not, I'm too big for a middle seat. No, I'm too big for a middle seat.

Speaker 1 The guy next to me was not happy, but the other guy on my other side, middle of the flight, takes out his phone, starts watching YouTube videos without headphones in. Can't do that.

Speaker 1 I just turned to him and I was like, hey, you got headphones, buddy? And he's like, no.

Speaker 1 And then he kept on watching. I was like, well, you're going to turn that off? And he gave me this huff-puff.
And I was like, listen, if we want to fight in a phone booth here in this corner, we will.

Speaker 1 You can't watch.

Speaker 1 You cannot watch movies

Speaker 1 on your phone with no headphones. It would have been a great power move if you had flagged the stewardess or the steward down and been like, Excuse me, can I get some headphones?

Speaker 1 And then paid for them like five bucks or something.

Speaker 1 Here you go, dude. Because

Speaker 1 you can't afford them, even though I'm sitting in a middle seat. Exactly.

Speaker 1 Totally alpha the guy in the aisle seat. I actually saved my money by getting this middle seat so I could buy your stupid headphones.

Speaker 1 It was awesome, though, because it happened like halfway through the flight. So we had an hour and a half left of just sitting next to each other with tension.
A lot of tension. And that is thrilling.

Speaker 1 Can't fall asleep. No.
Wanted to fall asleep. Couldn't fall asleep.
What if he rabbit punches me while I'm falling asleep?

Speaker 1 It would have been worse than a rabbit punch if he had started listening to like simply having a wonderful Christmas time. Oh my god.

Speaker 1 I would have got that. I would have played it.
Actually, the whole plan would have jumped him. He was a weirdo, though.
He was a big, he also ate a full like tuna fish sandwich. So it was already bad.

Speaker 1 That's true. It was already in a bad spot.

Speaker 1 One last who's back of the week. Our guy Jules.
We're thinking about Jules. Yeah.
There was an alleged incident. Three Jules.
An alleged incident in Southern California

Speaker 1 where he it was probably like a very

Speaker 1 low-mileage car. I misunderstand it.

Speaker 1 And Julian wanted to emphasize that he's trying to save the earth and jumped on the car to try to disable the engine that was contributing so many carbon emissions to the environment. And

Speaker 1 I guess it got lost in translation somehow, and the cops came. He was with Paul Pierce beforehand.
When you're with Paul Pierce, that's just, that's bound to happen. Oh, he's with Danny Amendola, too.

Speaker 1 Bad influence, Danny.

Speaker 3 Paul Pierce put up a picture, and someone commented was like, was this before Jules got arrested? And Pierce replied, It was like, Minutes before, my street cred has never been higher.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 3 The guy that got stabbed like 11 times and then played an entire season. Now his street credit is looking good.

Speaker 1 Well, then he also said that he shit his pants during the game. Remember that? I think his street cred probably went up, actually, when he had to shit his pants.

Speaker 1 Is that why he brought the wheelchair out? No, he was very hurt. Oh, I thought he was just battled through.

Speaker 1 Extreme injury against all

Speaker 3 the back and win that that game, yeah.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 1 But yeah, Julian,

Speaker 1 we got your back. We got you.
They always say you literally run like a deer. That's about as close.
Getting hit by a car. It was a frame jump.

Speaker 1 Yeah, it was a setup. It was actually Danny Amendola, and the person who filed the report was Al Michaels.
Yes. Because he always mixes those two guys up.
So, Danny, we know your tricks.

Speaker 1 We do dirtbag. Dirtbag.
Dirtbag. Okay.
Jules. We got Stanford Steve.

Speaker 1 You want to do a couple last ads and we're going to do a big-time college football championship preview with our man Stanford Steve. Absolutely.

Speaker 1 This interview with Stanford Steve is brought to you by Peloton.

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Now, Stanford Steve.

Speaker 1 okay we now welcome on recurring guest stanford steve because you were on before when we did the mount rush more of mount rushmores with scott van pelt you are scott van pelt's right hand man you're actually more famous than that though now you have behind the bets podcast we're in new orleans it's not behind the bets stanford steve and the bear stanford steve and the bear formerly behind the bets got it uh let's start here so we're in the national we're here for the national championship in new orleans You showed up with a full LSU track suit, which to me just validates everyone's

Speaker 1 stay woke that ESPN is all SEC bias. You guys paid for this game to happen for LSU to get here, and you are showing everyone your allegiance to the SEC with your LSU jumpsuit.
Okay,

Speaker 1 a couple things. You set yourself up for that.
A couple things. All right.
We are in my favorite state in the country, Louisiana.

Speaker 1 You will see later on. There are no rules.
If you've been here, you know that, right, PFD. Louisiana.

Speaker 1 It's awesome. I do have in my bag.

Speaker 1 He's pulling it out. It'd be 100%.
He has an alternate LSU. Oh, no, it's a Bama jumpsuit.
So it's a Bama jumpsuit.

Speaker 1 So he made sure that no matter what, he was covered when people said, hey, aren't you supposed to be a little bit of a signal? Oh, there he is. The Clemson jumpsuit.
That actually

Speaker 1 is that the bag that you use to drop off the cash to the NCAA

Speaker 1 to make sure that LSU has Mark Lime to Oklahoma. Yeah,

Speaker 1 to the attention of Mark Edward here. They got to avoid OS year.

Speaker 1 Let me know when we are halfway through, and I will go change into the clubs. All right, Hank, you got me? I'm on the clock.

Speaker 1 Okay, so we have you, Steve, here because you are a college football expert. I actually don't think I know anyone who loves college football as much as you do.
Would you think that's fair to say?

Speaker 1 I would like to be in the conversation for sure. You love the sport, you breathe the sport, you eat the sport.

Speaker 1 You are here. This is the game.
So let's start with the game. We'll talk about all the other stuff, but let's start with the game.
Give us

Speaker 1 why LSU is going to win by 100.

Speaker 1 Well, going back, you know, obviously the last time we saw them was the Peach Bowl, and I was really curious to see how Burrow came off the banquet tour.

Speaker 1 You know, going to the Heisman Trophy, going to the awards in Atlanta,

Speaker 1 going on part of my take studio, you know, in New York City. And I was really, I just, I thought, like, you know, obviously maybe a little rust.
You know, that was a long layoff.

Speaker 1 And he came out as sharp as possible. Yep.

Speaker 1 So

Speaker 1 the layoff thing is not,

Speaker 1 I don't think it's going to be a factor here.

Speaker 1 And the one thing I will say is as good as he is, his receivers are incredible. They're all NFL guys.
And I mean, they could just do whatever they want.

Speaker 1 And then you mentioned Edwards Alaire, the running back. I mean, they've just done whatever they've wanted every single game, running the ball, throwing the ball.

Speaker 1 His over for passing yards in the national title game is 365. That's insane.
That's incredible. That's insane.

Speaker 1 So, I mean, if they just come out and play their game, I mean, obviously, I just think Clemson has a couple tricks.

Speaker 1 Not a couple tricks, but I think a couple things they could do defensively to make them

Speaker 1 one-dimensional, or at least try to. But, I mean, as long as Burrows on the field, you got to be confident.
So what is Dabo going to do?

Speaker 1 What gadgets is he going to pull out to try to limit Louisiana State's offense?

Speaker 1 Well, going back to the fiesta bowl, and it feels like a couple days after, the talk was, oh, this game's going to, this isn't the game we wanted because we thought Ohio State matched up better with LSU.

Speaker 1 I totally disagreed. I thought Clemson matches up better with LSU because in order to beat LSU, you have to outscore him.

Speaker 1 You got to keep pace. You're not going to shut him down.

Speaker 1 You got to pencil LSU in for 28 points. I like that.
I like that. To beat LSU, you got to outscore him.
Score more points. Score points.

Speaker 1 You do have like a little Trent Dilfer vibe going on, too.

Speaker 1 No, I know what you're saying, though.

Speaker 1 But they're built better.

Speaker 1 They can put up big points.

Speaker 1 I mean, Trevor Lawrence, and I'm getting killed also, too, because I would take Trevor Lawrence over Burrow. Really? Yeah,

Speaker 1 what he showed in that Fiesta Ball, how he, the amount of times he got hit, and everybody's saying Chase Young didn't have a sack, but he hit him 95 times right after he threw the ball. Right.

Speaker 1 And he helped him up get up off the field

Speaker 1 or helped him get off after he knocked him down every single time uh so there the clemson has the goods i thought the receivers were were kind of spotty there i think they're they're pretty elite okay you know if you're going to say that i mean yeah the e-word well you need to

Speaker 1 you need to show respect yeah you can say elite but more than anything you need to show respect to dabo's program excuse me program because he is saying that he is a big nobody respect flea flicker flea flicker sorry there's a flea flicker in the game called

Speaker 1 But do you respect Clemson? Because he as Abba always says the national media doesn't respect us. Absolutely.
Real talk for a second here. Yeah.
It's amazing how

Speaker 1 they've stayed motivated 29 in a row.

Speaker 1 But in order to stay motivated, you see how annoying he is. And I mean, just imagine if you're annoyed with how he goes about things and claiming an underdog.

Speaker 1 Like, he came out with Vampell after the fiesta. He's like, well, people still, I mean, we're number three.
They're number one. Like,

Speaker 1 he's just still mad.

Speaker 1 It's so, I mean,

Speaker 1 it's maniacal the way he goes about things. And I can't imagine being a player and hearing it if we're already kind of tired, you know, being on the outside and we hear that stuff.

Speaker 1 Well, it also speaks to like the fact that they haven't lost in two years. You know, the way I've always understood it, and you, you obviously played at Stanford.

Speaker 1 You can tell me if this is totally wrong, but the way Saban does it, the way like Urban did it, you have basically two shots a year to get your guys at peak, peak, ready for a game.

Speaker 1 There's going to be lulls otherwise. There's going to be games that are going to be tougher because you maybe not have 100%.

Speaker 1 So to keep them ready and keep that

Speaker 1 bullet in the gun for those peak games when you're playing NC State in the middle of, you know, October or whatever it may be.

Speaker 1 And they only had one real game that they almost tripped up against North Carolina. Otherwise, they have been incredible for two years straight now.

Speaker 1 It's an unbelievable. I mean, you go back and look at it's 150 years of college football.
This run is up there.

Speaker 1 It's

Speaker 1 what they've done, the amount of times they had to play Alabama, who is on their own incredible run with Sabin.

Speaker 1 Do you feel like he gets enough credit, though?

Speaker 1 It feels like we want to take shots at him because of the way he goes about things. You know what? I don't think he gets enough credit.
I think he has in the past.

Speaker 1 This year, he's been overshadowed for sure because there have been more exciting storylines.

Speaker 1 And, like, you can't get out of Coach O's, you can't escape his shadow when you're being compared to when you're matched up against him in the title game.

Speaker 1 It's like everyone's going to be talking about Coach O. Sorry, Dabo.

Speaker 1 Hearing you say, like, go Tigers at the end of your interview isn't going to move the needle, like Coach O rambling on about gumbo and sounding like he's a tiger that got struck by a bolt of lightning.

Speaker 1 Like, everyone loves Coach O. It's also a very weird thing with college football because we always like complain about coaches and then you look back and what is it?

Speaker 1 There's three coaches right now that have a national title that are coaching. It's Les, Miles, Dabbo, and Sabin.
Am I forgetting someone? I mean, Urban just retired. Yeah, Urban just retired.

Speaker 1 Les came back. Right.

Speaker 1 Jimbo Fisher. Jimbo Fisher.
So there's four. So there's four guys.
You say, like, oh, I want to coach a national champion caliber coach. There's four of them.

Speaker 1 Four of them in 150 programs, wherever it may be.

Speaker 1 So it's a weird dynamic where everyone complains about coaching, then you have to take a step back and be like, oh, yeah, there's really only three guys. You know what I mean?

Speaker 1 There's three guys

Speaker 1 and I put Jimbo in there, probably not less at Kansas anymore.

Speaker 1 And Urban is retired. So all these guys, you know, Dabbo and Sabin are at just a completely different level.

Speaker 1 And then when they get to that completely different level, we try to pick them apart because that's the nature, right? To pick someone apart to try to find something wrong with everyone. Absolutely.

Speaker 1 And that's the trickle-down effect. Like, look at, you know, you've had Jim Harbaugh on the show.
Like, what's Michigan going to do? Who are they going to get that is better than him?

Speaker 1 Yeah, it's like, and all these fan bases, you know, the websites and all this, like, what do you think you're getting? You just said it. There's four guys.

Speaker 1 Four guys in the sport have one national title.

Speaker 1 The Harbaugh thing's so weird, too, because you can, depending on which angle you want to look at it at, you can make the case convincingly one way or the other because you could say he hasn't beaten Ohio State.

Speaker 1 They haven't been in the college football playoff. They're not, you know, relevant on a national scale like Clemson in Alabama.

Speaker 1 Or you could do, you could look at it like a Rich Eisman and be like, hey, they were two games away from a national college football playoff, two times.

Speaker 1 The spot, and then what was the other year? They were like that close. They've never been to Indy, but they've been that close.

Speaker 1 And they're significantly better than they were the 10 years before he got there.

Speaker 1 He's lost games that no one thought they were going to win. Yeah, I think it's just the way he's

Speaker 1 lost to Ohio State. Yeah, no, the way he's lost to Ohio State is the way that that's where it hurts.
I think the fact that there hasn't been one game where he's kind of broken that trend.

Speaker 1 It was the game of the spot. It was the game.
It was the game of spot. So if he had one win against Ohio State, then that would turn the entire thing around.
And I think you're right.

Speaker 1 People do need to, it's actually a good life lesson to

Speaker 1 be very happy having...

Speaker 1 moderate success at something and not ever thinking that you can like be the top or that you deserve the top of everything.

Speaker 1 Like with Michigan, yeah, you could say, we're not competing for a national title right now. We're going to get rid of Harbaugh.
They'll probably get somebody in there who's worse.

Speaker 1 They'll end up getting worse by trying to get better. Yeah, Steve, let me ask you this then, because it's also expectations.

Speaker 1 And college football fan bases in general, I think, are the fan bases that are most irrational with their expectations.

Speaker 1 Which fan bases are the craziest when it comes to where they think they should be and where reality is? Because that's really what it comes down to.

Speaker 1 Michigan thinks they should be Alabama, Ohio State, and Clemson. They're not.
Craziest.

Speaker 1 Craziest or worse. Craziest.
Oh, Michigan's up there. Michigan's up there.

Speaker 1 Look at Bo Shembeckler. I mean, R.I.P.
I'm sorry. Go back and look at his record in bowl games.
I think he coached in 10 Rose Bowls. You know how many won? What, one, two? Two? Yeah.
Two and eight.

Speaker 1 But he's a God.

Speaker 1 I mean,

Speaker 1 the image, you know, everything that was created before us, you know, all that stuff is kind of nuts when you go back and look at it.

Speaker 1 And, you know, we're doing the all these celebrations of top coaches you know all this stuff shem neckler in the top 20 is is not right by the way

Speaker 1 i like it i like it are you a little bit offended that espn didn't ask you to take part in like one of their 19 different alternate channel broadcasts for the game tomorrow yeah You should just do a periscope of yourself on the toilet in the Superdome and be like, this is the 10th broadcast.

Speaker 1 We got responsibilities. We got posting responsibilities.
Do a periscope of yourself with the coaches corner room on in the background.

Speaker 1 like you're having a conversation with them, like you're part of the crew. Yes, insert yourself.
All right, so Michigan, what's another one?

Speaker 1 Give me another one so people don't think we're just picking on Michigan. Texas.
I know, this has turned into a Michigan. Miami.
Texas. Miami.
That's a great one. Nebraska.

Speaker 1 I mean, Miami is. Nebraska, yeah.
Those are girls. You guys are nailing this.
Why are you even asking me? Miami is a really easy problem to solve. It's like, just let them cheat.

Speaker 1 Just hire the biggest possible cheater. Pay more.
Pay more. All the time.
Yeah. Find another guy that's got a Ponzi scheme going there and let him run the program again.
Okay.

Speaker 1 Those are really good.

Speaker 1 All right. So then do this as well because we're doing like a state-of-the-llege football.
So it has been dominated. The college football playoff has been dominated by the same grouping of teams.

Speaker 1 Give me one or two teams that hasn't been there that you could see realistically being there in the next five years. Oh,

Speaker 1 thank you. Really good question.
And you don't have to say Wisconsin because they aren't going to be. It's okay.

Speaker 1 Texas? Okay. You believe in them? I do.
What about your guy in Utah?

Speaker 1 Man, if they couldn't get there this year, like, what the heck, man? Yeah. You know,

Speaker 1 Oregon. Yeah.
Yeah. Minnesota.
PJ Fleck. I know you're a big PJ Fleck guy.
I am. I mean, roll the boat.
But I think. All ski-ba.
Whatever the hell. Yeah.
Go Gophers.

Speaker 1 It's an easier way to put it. We need to just keep adding things for PJ Fleck so every sign-off is like 15 minutes long.
It's incredible how

Speaker 1 Co-Big Ten West champions. It's true.
Just didn't go to Indy. That's true.

Speaker 1 He signs off every single address like the most annoying person in the world that emails you and has 19 different abbreviations for project manager professional. It's crazy.
He gets results.

Speaker 1 Those are the type of coaches that make an impact where it's like, that was the best season Minnesota has had in 50 years.

Speaker 1 Now they still didn't win the axe, and you could say that that's disappointing, but I won't say that. Now, what about Rutgers? So my man Greg Shiana is making his trial.

Speaker 1 He's got a helicopter going around recruiting.

Speaker 1 Does he have missiles on it?

Speaker 1 You need to give him a military helicopter. He's just shooting recruits with nets and just dragging them back to the fucking Piscataway.
Yeah, you're coming to New Jersey, buddy. Got the big R on it.

Speaker 1 The Rose Bowl goes through Piscataway. I believe I said that I would cut my penis off if they were ever ranked number one in top football.
It's cutting his penis.

Speaker 1 Yeah, it's pretty nice.

Speaker 1 So are they ever going to be able to compete in the Big Ten?

Speaker 1 I mean, they're competing now, aren't they?

Speaker 1 They're out there. They do play.
Doing their thing. They do field a team.
All right, I'll phrase it this way. Over-under wins for Greg Sciano in his first two years.

Speaker 1 Seven.

Speaker 1 Ooh.

Speaker 1 Over. Okay.
Ooh.

Speaker 1 Because. Spicy.

Speaker 1 I would imagine he took that job and can finagle that maybe that second year schedule. They're playing FC Midwest.

Speaker 1 Yeah, right. California State.
Right, right. So that's

Speaker 1 not a bad number, though. I've always wondered how come the Northeast never has any good college football teams.
When was the last time they had a competitive team? Matt Ryan, B.C.

Speaker 1 It's really Syracuse

Speaker 1 in Connecticut, obviously.

Speaker 1 They went to Fiesta Bowl. Huh?

Speaker 1 Yukon, Fiesta Bowl. Yeah, absolutely.

Speaker 1 You know who the offense coordinator was?

Speaker 1 Who's the oncoming? Just got fired at Mississippi State. Oh,

Speaker 1 Tomorhead, yeah. But yeah, no, that's

Speaker 1 B.C., Matt Ryan. I mean, we can't really, you can't claim Penn State.
You know, Pennsylvania is its own thing. It's not the same thing.
The Temples had Matt Ryan. Syracuse.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 Syracuse, Dino Babers. They had some.
Philly, I don't count. Yeah, I don't count.
Syracuse back in the day. Yeah.

Speaker 1 You know, but yeah, it's pretty pathetic how bad college football is. Sad, sad state of affairs.
About the NESCAC and the Ivy League. That's all.

Speaker 1 All right. So then one more big college football question.
You go everywhere. Yep.
You travel everywhere. Give me your Mount Rushmore of college football towns that you like to go to for a game day.

Speaker 1 For a game day. What? Oh, what do you go? Oh, we're watching the game.
Hank just put his hand up. I thought there was something wrong.

Speaker 1 By the way, can I just say that I love, Sneaky Love,

Speaker 1 your podcast with the Bear, Behind the Bats, with Stanford, Steve, and the Bear.

Speaker 1 I love when you, every single show, they start it with Steve asking Bear how he's going to get to and from game day.

Speaker 1 And it's the funny, like, it's one of those things you think it wouldn't be interesting, but when they break down, like, the options to get to, like, Corvallis, and you're like, what?

Speaker 1 Oh, Jesus Christ, it really is this time. You're like, Pullman Washington.
It's incredible. It's, it's my favorite thing that they do.

Speaker 1 That's just like, you would think, like, two guys talking about plane trips is boring, but it's fascinating every time.

Speaker 1 It's him. Yeah.
His delivery. He knows what he's in for and all that stuff.

Speaker 1 So that's my man, and I always try and make sure he's good. The bear has to be rested and capable to do his duty.
So he has to be comforted.

Speaker 1 The best thing about it is I always try and make sure there's always a private jet involved because of Herb Street. So

Speaker 1 that's the main. That's how it starts.

Speaker 1 Yeah, because Herb Street gets a private jet everywhere, right?

Speaker 1 Okay, so top four.

Speaker 1 Four college football towns that you

Speaker 1 love going to. Baton Rouge, that's an easy one.
One. I have a little recency bias because I went to Ole Miss this year.
Okay. And the Grove is absolutely incredible.
The stadium,

Speaker 1 it wasn't really that full, but it was a lull week. LSU had just beaten Alabama.
Ole Miss was Ole Miss.

Speaker 1 Camp Randall's up there. Okay.

Speaker 1 Wandos. Appreciate that.
Shout out to Gaza Wandos. For a game-day atmosphere, Wisconsin is definitely up there.
Just a little weird

Speaker 1 with the tailgating scene there. Yeah, there isn't much because there's too much city.
Like, there's not enough. It's not like going to Iowa where Iowa tailgates are awesome.

Speaker 1 There's fields everywhere, Penn State, where, or even Michigan with the golf course across the road. Like, you don't have the wide open spaces.
Yeah. Like, I'd agree.

Speaker 1 Go there. Outson Stadium, Oregon is pretty incredible.
So that's a good four. I like that.
Seattle, U-W is. I like Utah.

Speaker 1 U-Wub is the loudest stadium I ever was in, played in, and I love when that upper deck shakes.

Speaker 1 Weirdest camera. They all do it.
What is that? Physics?

Speaker 1 Weirdest camera angles.

Speaker 1 Sure.

Speaker 1 Washington for basketball and football, weirdest camera angles.

Speaker 1 Do you ever, whenever you watch a Pac-12 game late with Bill Walton on the mic, and you're like,

Speaker 1 why can't he? Right, it's like he's on his head. They can't see the whole port.
They have to slowly pan. It's like, if a fast break happens too fast, you're not going to hit see it.

Speaker 1 You ever do the sailgating and then have the U-Wub rowing team row you into the game? I did not do that.

Speaker 1 Apparently, you pay them like five bucks and they just take you from your boat right up to the gate. Nice.
Yeah. That's pretty good ROI.
Boys in the Boat, great book.

Speaker 1 We were going to read that for Andrew Luck's book club, but then we decided to read Wikipedia instead. That was his first month.

Speaker 1 Do you think that Andrew Luck Luck has made it seem like Stanford's a little soft by retiring? No. Okay.
I just wanted to throw that in. Sure.

Speaker 1 Yes. Okay.
They were already soft before he retired. Incorrect.
Our mutual friend Sam Schwartzeen has a nice spin zone going. Well, it was nice when the Texans were up 24-0.

Speaker 1 He said, is Andrew Luck the MVP of the NFL this year because he let the AFC South thrive by retiring?

Speaker 1 Okay. That's it.
What about

Speaker 1 famous professor adjunct Condoleezza Rice? Are you disappointed that she didn't get any interviews this year?

Speaker 1 Am I disappointed? To be a head coach, yeah. No.
Okay. What about when

Speaker 1 Stanford played Kansas on a primetime Saturday afternoon game and they scored two points in 15 minutes? Yeah. What about it? I'm just comment.
Did you see what they've done since? What's up?

Speaker 1 Honestly, Pac-12. Yeah,

Speaker 1 there's only one team with no losses in the Pac-12.

Speaker 1 Arizona State? No. Oh.

Speaker 1 Stanford. Stanford.
So you were here. Were you here for the

Speaker 1 last two national championships in New Orleans? I was not here in 07. I was here in 11.
Okay, so you're here in 2011 in New Orleans.

Speaker 1 How big of a home field advantage is it going to be inside the Superdome tomorrow? It's funny. We were talking about it yesterday.
Just the idea of that game.

Speaker 1 It's still

Speaker 1 mind-boggling to know.

Speaker 1 I thought it was more Alabama actually in the stadium, in the dome, than LSU in 11. And then my buddy, who's an LSU alum, shout out Brandon Landry, was like, we didn't have a thing to cheer for.

Speaker 1 So of course it was LSU. That's like when we went to Baton Rouge last year against Alabama and it was awesome and then there was no cheering.
It was,

Speaker 1 I would say it was 50-50.

Speaker 1 This is going to be interesting though because I call it the Sabin disease of fans is Alabama fans got fatigued of going to SEC title games, playoff games, and national championships.

Speaker 1 Only so much money you can spend going back on. So does Clemson have that already? Yeah.
Are they that spoiled? Interesting.

Speaker 1 Spoiled fan base. I like that take.
Santa Clara was a pricey ticket or a pricey.

Speaker 1 They showed. They showed.
I mean, I was impressed with the

Speaker 1 Clemson turnout there. But also, you factor in, I mean, it's a long drive, but it's doable.
So they can also fly.

Speaker 1 Actually, a lot of South Carolinians are on probation, so they probably can't leave their state without checking in first. It's an issue there.
Why? For various things. Usually just fraud.
Oh. Yeah.

Speaker 1 A lot of fraud. It's a hot fraud town.
It's a hot fraud town.

Speaker 1 A lot of fraud. Okay, so I have.

Speaker 1 It'll be a considerable advantage. All right, I have one last question.
SeatGeek question. PFT's got his seats through SeatGeek.

Speaker 1 They're really nice seats, yeah. You can go to the national title game.
You can knock off $10 off the price with promo code TAKE. By the way, I'll wave to you guys from the field, all right?

Speaker 1 Or you got sideline passes? Yeah, that's because you got LSU into the national title game. Sorry, we like to watch.

Speaker 1 I think we're going to get a lot of you guys' sideline passes? We don't want to bother him because he's a busy guy and we don't want to be.

Speaker 1 That friend that hits him up is like, hey, oh, we need passes, coach. No, no, I actually didn't because to me, it was more important to

Speaker 1 keep that

Speaker 1 possibility of a post-game interview than be on the sideline. Well, also, we don't accept gifts from programs because we're Capital J journalists.
Right. So it would compliment.

Speaker 1 We don't want to show up to an interview at the number one sports podcast in an LSU jumpsuit showing up. I've never worn a jump up in a jumpsuit.

Speaker 1 Yeah, no, that's all right. Yeah, you held it it up.
You didn't want to change it.

Speaker 1 This is also a podcast, which is an audio format.

Speaker 1 Look at the shirt. Oh, what's the shirt say? It says it says.

Speaker 1 Wow. Oh, South Carolina Dabo.

Speaker 1 Great. Look at that.
Dabo. Great.
Well, that's awesome. All right.
So, sneaky question.

Speaker 1 Give me the final prediction. You hate South Carolina.
No, I don't. I actually don't.
I think it's a fun time. It's in Inferior Carolina.
No, I went to

Speaker 1 North Carolina is better than South Carolina. The colors at UNC.
You got the Outer Banks, first in flight,

Speaker 1 better license plate, better barbecue, better research drawings. Better rap songs.
Best barbecue I've had is a great rap.

Speaker 1 So I like Clemson. We went there for the Texas A ⁇ M game earlier in the year.
Oh, we forgot about that. Very fun time.

Speaker 1 Yeah, it was a very, very fun time. Very good time.

Speaker 1 I mean, I'm just, I'm very much biased towards Coach O. So

Speaker 1 we're in a 60-minute war. I'm not about to be nice and hold hands with Clemson before the national title game.
So give us

Speaker 1 a final prediction and also your best bet because I know you went through all the props, too. Yeah,

Speaker 1 so

Speaker 1 we talked about earlier, obviously, I think Clemson is going to hang around. I think they have the offensive capability to do that.
I'm still, LSU's defense has been great since they got back healthy.

Speaker 1 I mean, they had like five or six legit injuries after that Texas game, which was

Speaker 1 week two, and it took them, you know, eight, nine weeks to get back.

Speaker 1 But Lawrence, the receivers, ETN is incredible. I think Clemson hangs around, maybe goes up early, but I see LSU winning 36, 33.

Speaker 1 Clemson covers. So is that the what's the over-under at, right? 69.5? Yeah, that's the under.
That's a jerk. Yeah.

Speaker 1 That's a jerk move. Because when it finishes right around the total that Vegas already set, you can be like, told you it'd be right around that.
Yeah, you have it right around the number.

Speaker 1 It's combined for both in the 40s. I'll be

Speaker 1 close. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Do you see in any possibility in any world this game being played in the 20s? No. Okay.
No. That's all I'm doing.
It actually is the 20s. It just turned.
That's true.

Speaker 1 Good point.

Speaker 1 Also, I want to get slapped in the face somewhere on Bourbon Street after I take a shot. You know, those bars where they hit you? Yeah.
I want to get dommed on Bourbon Street.

Speaker 1 Do you have a suggestion? Razoos.

Speaker 1 Razoos? Yes. Get slapped in.
So you've got

Speaker 1 to go. No, I have not.
You've slapped it

Speaker 1 way too fast. Do you want to do that again?

Speaker 1 I'm going to do that again and think a little bit more about it. Bourbon streets.
I haven't been slapped.

Speaker 1 Sorry. I like how it opens up in the back.
The coolers are right there. All right.
Easy access. The biggest problem with bourbon is

Speaker 1 bathrooms.

Speaker 1 Yeah, that's true.

Speaker 1 What about, can't you just go to it in the street?

Speaker 1 What about diaper? I might dipe up. What about wings? Where we're eating wings tomorrow.
Shout out Mark Titus, who's a huge beta.

Speaker 1 I did not do my homework for that. Still, PFT was actually in Hong Kong when that happened.
And for

Speaker 1 Titus, I think, talked about it on his podcast. We never talked about it here.
Nerd. When we were at the Final Four in Minneapolis, are you guys talking since the Ohio State game? Uh, well, no,

Speaker 1 which Ohio State game? Ohio State has not won a basketball game this century or this decade.

Speaker 1 It's pretty tough for him, but anyway, Steve and I and Mark, we were all at the bar in Minneapolis, and we were talking. We're like, where are we going to get wings tomorrow?

Speaker 1 And Titus thought that that was like an outrageous thing to discuss, being like, hey, you want to go get wings tomorrow? He said it was like too alpha for him. So, I don't know.

Speaker 1 He's been giving us shit ever since. He was intimidated by the fact that it was

Speaker 1 not getting wings. Yeah, a guy date for wings.

Speaker 1 Yeah, we were like, hey, let's get some wings. It's a very beta move right to get intimidated by.

Speaker 1 It's like, dude, that's how guys say hi to each other. He's like, hey, hey, what's up? Where are we getting some flats tomorrow? Yeah, like, let's go get some wings.

Speaker 1 You do the drumsticks. I'll do the flats.
Yeah, I just need a place that's got spicy wings and room temperature cores light. So are we getting wings tomorrow? Sure.
Is there a place that you love?

Speaker 1 Not wings, not really. Okay, so maybe we'll

Speaker 1 get wings together. Let's go Willie Mays or we're going going to menchu's okay or some gumbo maybe and also can people please

Speaker 1 to slap in my face you have to be so you're moving to dc soon yes it's a big move congratulations to you and scott that's great um

Speaker 1 are you gonna miss the pizza though i would imagine that's the hardest part about moving absolutely hello somebody's knocking on the door come on in oh for sure i think it's i think it's our friend chris law it's hey what's up our friend chris lawyer jean jacket what's up buddy how are you hey dude sorry chris we're not smoking any doubties right now.

Speaker 1 Come on in. Recording a podcast.
We're literally finishing up the big interview with

Speaker 1 Stanford Steve. Good to see you.

Speaker 1 Here, sit down and have a mic.

Speaker 1 Have a mic. Unexpected guest, Chris Long.
Go ahead, you sit down.

Speaker 3 Sit down. You sit down, Allie.
Share a mic.

Speaker 1 Okay, we got 20

Speaker 1 more yards for Carlos. So you're moving.

Speaker 1 I don't think they're going to have another rushing attack. How mad is Hank right now? Very mad.

Speaker 1 We're the douchebags. Everyone's got a podcast.
All right, we're going to end this.

Speaker 1 Steve, thank you very much.

Speaker 1 Justin Ross over receiving yards. Amari Rogers over receiving yards.
Alaire under rush yards. There it is.
Okay. There it is.
And maybe we'll have Chris Long on maybe tomorrow for Wednesday.

Speaker 1 We'll see.

Speaker 1 You didn't thank me for my appearance on this pod. Oh, yeah.
Thank you, Chris, for being on. Baron Speed.
Baron Speed. Yeah, we'll put you in the podcast.

Speaker 1 All right. Thank you, Steve.
Love you guys.

Speaker 1 hold that target,

Speaker 1 down in the bayou,

Speaker 1 hold that taro,

Speaker 1 down in the bayou,

Speaker 1 hold that target,

Speaker 1 hold that

Speaker 1 hold that target

Speaker 1 Hold that

Speaker 1 hold that target

Speaker 1 the value

Speaker 1 hold that target

Speaker 1 down in the value

Speaker 1 hold that target,

Speaker 1 down in the volume,

Speaker 1 hold that target,

Speaker 1 down in the fire,

Speaker 1 hold that target.

Speaker 1 Hold that target

Speaker 1 Hold that target