NFL Week 13 Recap, Fastest 2 Minutes, Nick Foles Crazy Career And Sad Harbaugh

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Speaker 1 On today's pardon my take, we have football. You just watched football for five days straight and we have a recap of all of it.

Speaker 1 You're probably sitting in your cube right now, dying after a long weekend of eating and watching football.

Speaker 1 What is that? Driving? You're driving. You're in your commute.
Wherever you may be.

Speaker 1 Be careful. That was a good little note there, Hank.
Because we have football. We also have a bigger deal than that.

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Speaker 1 Okay, let's go.

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Speaker 1 week 13.

Speaker 1 What?

Speaker 1 What?

Speaker 1 Loop that up there.

Speaker 1 We start in the meadowlands where a snowy Alan Blizzard was dumping points as he picked up a precipitation trophy from the snowflakes in the giant secondary.

Speaker 1 Dave Gettleman and Pat Shermer wish they hadn't drank the Kool-Aid from Daniel Jonestown after the rookie quarterback threw three dimes to the other team.

Speaker 1 Aaron Carter Rogers does two things: hate his family members and set gold records as he threw for four four touchdowns for the third time in his career against the New York football giants Packers 31 Giants 13

Speaker 1 the frozen medal some spread in Baltimore it was Lamar de Gras as Jackson showed flashes of brilliance in Charm City exposing the 49ers defense for a couple of TDs the game came down to the final possession where Tucker had just enough for the game winner and Robbie Golden Girl looks like he's over the hill, but can still get fucked.

Speaker 1 Let us be the last to wish you a happy turkey day as Kyle Honeyglaze Shanaham goes home hungry and Harbaugh wins a big game on Thanksgiving weekend.

Speaker 1 In Charlotte where Darius Vanilla Geist said, check out my hook while my DJ Moore revolves it.

Speaker 1 He was cooking MC Caffries like a pound of bacon as Kyle Allen was playing like do do do do do do do, do do do do do do do do. The Panthers weren't the only team with a cam

Speaker 1 as Dwayne Haskins took a knee instead of a selfie to end this one. It might be time for the tomato garden for Ron Corleone as the Panthers coach's reign could be coming to an end.

Speaker 1 Redskins 29, Panthers 21. What? What?

Speaker 1 What?

Speaker 1 Up to Pittsburgh, where there's no love loss between these two teams. Devlin Merrill Hodges was a factor quack as the Steelers' new quarterback was calling ducks instead of throwing them.

Speaker 1 In memory of their former kicker, Jeff Dwayne Reed, this was the pharmacy bull as Bud Jermaine Dupree gave Baker Mayfield indigestion saying, welcome to Atlanta.

Speaker 1 And Benny Drill Snell put the Browns to sleep late in the fourth, putting an ace bandage wrap on their season.

Speaker 1 The Browns may be Kareem hunting for a new head coach after this season as a Freddy kitchen sink looks more like a toilet. Steelers 20, the Browns 13.

Speaker 1 In Cincinnati, where the windless Bengals brought their red rifle out of the gun case for the holidays, Sam Darnold wasn't making out with any sixes tonight, going scoreless all afternoon as Sam Donald Swantenego no longer is calming and calming and calming.

Speaker 1 Tyler had a Boydian slip, accidentally telling the Jets he wanted to score on them, then doing it anyway. Zach Brown Taylor likes his chicken fries, cold spaghetti chili on a Sunday night, because

Speaker 1 no one circles the wagons like the Cincinnati Bengals. Bengals.
Bengals 22, Jets 6. Whoop, whoop, whip, whip, whip.

Speaker 1 On the 10-year anniversary of the most famous one-car accident of all time, Robert Tiger Woods ran like he was being chased by his wife carrying a five-iron and a nasty grunge.

Speaker 1 The Rams Sunday was like a nice rounded cough. Jared, that is, using every play in their bag to bludgeon the cards.

Speaker 1 Kyler Bill Murray was seeing golfers in the secondary as he looked extra judge small standing in the pocket. Dante Chris Fowler showed up on game day.

Speaker 1 Uh, don't you mean Rhys Davis Boom? Yeah, that's right. Carl Ravich and the Rams are back on track.
Rams 34, the Cardo 7.

Speaker 5 My name is Sam Monaghan. And I'm Ray Hollowell, and we're with PlanC.org out of Honolulu, Hawaii.

Speaker 6 On our last excursion together, Ray and I boarded the Kanaloch is a small fishing vessel out of Halaeva on the north shore of Oahu.

Speaker 5 About three miles out, we noticed a dolphin started swimming erratically in front of the boat, you know, criss-crossing, and I guess it was trying to get our attention.

Speaker 5 And it did, and what we did, we observed something by one of the buoys out there. Captain Mick thought it might be a monk seal.

Speaker 5 And we get closer, and then I zoom in with my camera, and I see that it's a dolphin. And the dolphin got entangled in the buoy line.

Speaker 6 As I jumped in the water and swam close,

Speaker 6 The other dolphin wasn't around that initially made us notice this dolphin. It was really weak and when I got close to it I touched its tail and it rolled over onto its back and held its breath.

Speaker 6 I dove down about four feet which was where its tail had been locked into this noose and started cutting it off with the knife I brought.

Speaker 6 Slowly cut it off safely, didn't hurt the dolphin in any way.

Speaker 6 I wasn't sure if the dolphin even was still alive.

Speaker 6 I touched its stomach and I could feel its heart still beating and I rolled it over and it rolled over and took a breath and popped its head out of the ocean, looked at me above the water and then looked at me under the water.

Speaker 6 Then I saw its eyes. It had been hazy.
The eyes had kind of been hazy and the eyes kind of focused and saw me, looked at me and then made a little squeak and swam off.

Speaker 1 Dolphins 37, Eagles 31. In Kansas City where Darwin Hunter S.
Thompson went gonzo, making the Oakland Raiders defense look like they were sniffing ether.

Speaker 1 Travis Barker Kelsey had the offense in rhythm, doing all the small things, making Derek Carr think another six months he'll be unknown.

Speaker 1 Andy Reed didn't have a John Gluten-free diet this Thanksgiving as the Chiefs feasted off the bye. We finished with Patrick Mahomes down on the field.

Speaker 1 Patrick, man, I was all filled up on turkey with all the fixes after Thanksgiving. I must have ate my dang weight and ketchup at the supper table, but I was munching down on that zone defense all day.

Speaker 1 Do you see John Gruden, man? I call this guy Tchaikovsky because he looks like a little doll that's busting a nut every time he watches me play.

Speaker 1 It was super cool to see Coach Reef with Guy Fury showing him all the hot spots in Kansas City. It's no wonder Andy was ready to feast on a cupcake after spending all that time around frosty chips.

Speaker 1 Oh, Chiefs 40, Raiders 9.

Speaker 1 Standing on the corner, Jameis Winston, Tampa, Florida. Such a fine sight to see.

Speaker 1 It's a hose, my lord, hanging down to the floor. Nick Foles, you have a big PP.

Speaker 1 Come on, Gardner. Your balls are larger.

Speaker 1 Foles, thick is so big.

Speaker 1 It can't get any harder.

Speaker 1 Bucks 28. Jags 11.

Speaker 1 And we finish in Indianapolis where Ryan Gosling-Tannehill was really, really good looking as a leading man for the Titans drive.

Speaker 1 The only way Jacoby Brian Prissette makes up for his transgressions is with a giant ring as the Colts window is closing faster than a Jim Ursa roof.

Speaker 1 Derek Cortman Henry used his fat ass to tell Indy, score you guys, I'm getting him, as the Titans use their running back to pick up an important game in the AFC South Park.

Speaker 1 Oh my god, they killed Adam. Oh, that happened in week two, boom.
Titans 31, the Colts 17.

Speaker 1 All right.

Speaker 1 Week 13 almost in the books.

Speaker 4 We do have a good one on Monday night, too.

Speaker 1 We have a good one on Monday night, but take a deep breath because you are probably coming off a long weekend of football, college, NFL, wall-to-wall. It's one of those stretches.

Speaker 1 We have that too coming up as well

Speaker 1 over

Speaker 1 Christmas break when the poll games are on where you just sort of have this like new normal where you're like, yeah, I wake up, I get my coffee, and then there's football.

Speaker 1 There are also naps involved.

Speaker 4 Yeah, if you spend a weekend taking like seven or eight naps, it it actually makes you more tired when you get back to work on Monday.

Speaker 4 Your body is used to being able to fall asleep with your belly hanging out and your top button unbuttoned at least twice a day.

Speaker 1 Yeah, your muscle has like atrophy and you feel like a weak human being, but your brain is as sharp as it has ever been because you just watch football non-stop.

Speaker 1 Like you get to the point where you just have watched so much football that you start to get a little bit of the football related injury, a little blood coming out of your ears.

Speaker 1 Like, ooh, is that my brain leaking? No, I've just watched so much football. It's an all-time water cooler day, too.

Speaker 4 Yeah. Monday morning after Thanksgiving.
A lot of hot takes being dropped. A lot of is Tom Brady done this time being spoken.
So let's just jump into it.

Speaker 1 Yeah, let's jump into the Sunday night game. Hank, you weren't here last week.
Let's do the Sunday night game first. We do.
Give me a panic button update, Hank.

Speaker 1 Yeah, go ahead. Give us a panic button update.

Speaker 7 It's the panic button has been taking out of the case.

Speaker 1 Okay, because you did say last week that the Ravens are officially scary to you,

Speaker 7 Which has been double confirmed today.

Speaker 1 And there's a lot of football left, but as of right now, if the playoffs started today, the Ravens would be the one seed, and the Super Bowl would go through Baltimore. Yep.

Speaker 1 Well, the Chiefs would be the four seed as of today. The Chiefs.
Yes. Ooh, okay.
So you're saying that. You're trying to think, okay, maybe they...
Well, what if what if.

Speaker 7 We would play the Texans in the second round instead of the Chiefs.

Speaker 1 Well, what if the three seed, what if the six seed beats the three seed? The Steelers or the Titans beats the future.

Speaker 4 This is too close to math for my liking on a Monday morning.

Speaker 1 Didn't think about that. But anyway, the Patriots did not look good tonight.
The score was a lot closer at the end. Flue game, though.
Flue game.

Speaker 1 Tom Brady also, as a guy who dyes his hair, just want to shout out Tom Brady for having a nice new

Speaker 1 paint job there up top.

Speaker 4 Well, what he used to do is he kept it real tight on the sides like Forrest Gump almost. So you couldn't tell that he was going salt and pepper.

Speaker 4 Now he's starting to grow that out, maybe for a little winter warmth, get a little shaggy around the edges.

Speaker 1 And yeah, he was looking salt and peppery now it was like it was like jet black almost tonight it was a little disconcerting yeah so the this game though to me um as much as it was everyone's going to talk about the patriots tomorrow because that's they that's what happens when the patriots lose everyone talks about it's kind of like when alabama loses it becomes a huge story to me this game was more about the texans finally getting like a big huge win on a primetime stage where it's like man you say what you want about the patriots offense that hasn't looked good all year patriots defense is an unbelievable unbelievable defense, and the Texans were pretty damn effective against them.

Speaker 4 Every time I looked up, there was a guy with dreadlocks catching a 40-yard bomb from Deshaun Watson.

Speaker 1 Deshaun Watson.

Speaker 1 And Deshaun Watson is electric and also has that beautiful thing where

Speaker 1 Michael Vick, he's passed the torch for Michael Vick where he'll have at least two or three passes a game where he'll throw it 3,000 miles per hour at a receiver that's five feet away from him.

Speaker 1 And then he'll throw a dime 60 yards down the field, like drop it into a bucket. And you're like, what's going on here? Yeah.

Speaker 4 And on the other side, Tom Brady looked, he looked kind of dead tonight. He looked like he was the one seeing ghosts.
He was very scared of the Texans' SWAT team linebackers.

Speaker 1 Yeah, which credit to them, because if you dress like a SWAT team before a game, you have to win.

Speaker 4 And they won.

Speaker 4 You have to win. J.J.
Watt must have been so excited to not be included in that because he would have gone along with it. He would have said, okay, guys, I'll get dressed up.

Speaker 4 I'll wear the bulletproof vest, which if you're going to wear a bulletproof vest, you might want to do it five years ago when Aaron Hernandez is lining up against you as a linebacker.

Speaker 4 But this time, it was very fortunate that JJ Watt was not on the field because that would have been an all-time screen grab. Oh, yeah.

Speaker 1 And he, how pissed do you think JJ is right now that he wasn't able to do the whole SWAT team and then win that big game? That's got to suck. I mean, yeah, he might come back, though.

Speaker 4 He was on the sidelines a lot. He was the camera.
He showed him a ton. They're keeping a spot for him on the IR right now.

Speaker 1 But the Texans,

Speaker 1 all the credit in the world to them. They are officially, I think the AFC is officially has like another team, even though this is just how the NFL works, because what, two weeks ago,

Speaker 1 the Texans got the shit kicked out of them by the Ravens, and we were like, oh man, they aren't ready for primetime.

Speaker 1 But the AFC has slowly kind of morphed into, it's always been the NFC talk about how competitive it is.

Speaker 1 Now the AFC has four legitimate like division winners that are coming, emerging, and then a fifth team in the Bills, which we'll get to later, that also looks like they could make some noise.

Speaker 1 It's going to be a competitive playoffs.

Speaker 4 You know what season it is right now? It's coming into focus season. The picture is coming into focus big time.

Speaker 4 And yeah, the only thing that we really know for sure is that the Ravens are really, really good based on the games that the Patriots played against the Ravens and against the Texans and based on the Texans lost to the Ravens.

Speaker 4 We don't know which team is like second best at this point. All I know is that this was a flu game for the Patriots.
So we write,

Speaker 4 two things, Hank. Two spend zones on Do Your Pod.
One, it was a flu game. They had to take two planes down there.
Two is the fact that.

Speaker 7 Thank God they had an extra one just lying around.

Speaker 4 Yeah, yeah. Where did that second plane come from?

Speaker 1 It's just sitting in the hangar. Like, oh, yep, that's our flu.
That was Kraft's game day plane. That's just for the.
Oh,

Speaker 1 do you want to talk about that? What? The game day plane? That goes from

Speaker 1 Florida to get

Speaker 1 the city on yourself.

Speaker 4 It's for stress relief. By the way, they kept showing Steve Steve Belichick on the sidelines.
He did not look healthy. No.
I'll say this about

Speaker 1 you, Belichick. He needs to be

Speaker 1 fucking personally. What does that mean, Hank?

Speaker 1 I'm just saying, like, if they cut to you, like, it's not like they cut to you on the sidelines of a game and be like, oh, there's PFD Commander looking sharp. I would look very sharp.

Speaker 4 You leave. That's the same style that you have.

Speaker 1 I'm looking very sharp. I'm looking very sharp.
He kind of got you there. He kind of got you.
I think you had your hair down and you were wearing a jumpsuit on the sideline.

Speaker 1 People would definitely scream grab and be like, who's this guy?

Speaker 4 Well, yeah, there'd be a lot of who's this guy, but there would not be like that guy's dehydrated.

Speaker 4 Steve Belichick looked like he was the plumber on the second plane that went down there, just taking care of the bathroom.

Speaker 1 By the way,

Speaker 4 if you're flying nine people who all have the flu across the country, how does the bathroom situation shake out? Because you've got, I think, like maybe two or three bathrooms on that plane.

Speaker 1 What do they pay the flight attendants, too? You got to get extra pay, like time and a half, because you're just sitting there in the flu plane. Yeah.

Speaker 4 That sucks. That's really tough.

Speaker 1 Maybe they get a com attendant who also has the flu. So

Speaker 1 Or has the flu shot.

Speaker 1 So, Hank, Panic Button is out of the closet.

Speaker 7 Panic Button's out of the closet, and

Speaker 7 as much shit as Brady and the Patriots are going to get this week, if they come out next week and silently beat the Chiefs, it will all go away.

Speaker 1 Is that Sunday night as well?

Speaker 7 It's Sunday afternoon.

Speaker 1 Oh, it's Sunday afternoon. So the funny thing to me is how the narratives work in the NFL.
And obviously, the Patriots get all ⁇

Speaker 1 you can sit here and say they look bad tonight, but

Speaker 1 you still have to worry about them in the playoffs because they're the Patriots. And it's Tom Brady and Bill Belichick and everything they've proven.
But if you sat here and said

Speaker 1 there's an AFC East team with a great defense, a suspect offense, and they beat up on really bad opponents and then have lost some of their big games, you could be talking about the Bills or the Patriots.

Speaker 1 Right.

Speaker 4 If you're a Patriots fan, you're telling yourself Tom Brady is like a great closing salesperson. He doesn't get out of bed for the small deals, like a non-divisional game away on the road.

Speaker 4 Doesn't really matter. He can still do it in the playoffs when it counts.

Speaker 1 But now you're starting to think it's the chemistry it's the wide receiver chemistry that's bigger than the wide receiver chemistry they double up edelman it's basically like brady doesn't like any of his other receivers now do you think now uh antonio brown or gronk any chance no i don't think gronk can come back i read that

Speaker 4 i read that no it would be this week is when he said he was coming back oh yeah but i don't think that he's eligible to come back for some weird nfl rule that nobody understands too many too many gronk cruises that he's already agreed to yeah he's out of the country right now he can't he has too many commitments uh super bowl week they looked at his ad deals.

Speaker 1 Okay, let's go to... So Panic Button is out, but not fully pressed.
I think that's appropriate. I mean, they're still 10 and 2.
Like, that's...

Speaker 4 They're still 10 and 2. You're looking at the Panic Button.
You're staring at it.

Speaker 1 Hank, you just need to do this.

Speaker 8 We took it out of the cupboard, pulled it out of the box.

Speaker 4 Wait, was it in the glass enclosure? Was it in the closet or was it in the cupboard?

Speaker 1 I think it was buried, like, I think you buried it in the backyard. And then you took out a map and you paste it off off a tree after the Ravens game.

Speaker 1 And then you're like, no, I'm not going to actually take this. And then you started breaking the ground tonight, and

Speaker 1 you've dug it up, but you haven't brought it in the house. Right.
That would be my guess. It's sitting on the back porch, being like, ooh, it's kind of dirty.
Let's not bring it in. Right, maybe.

Speaker 1 But next week's more or less a maker's rake situation. Yeah, next week.

Speaker 7 Because if they lose, then it's like.

Speaker 1 Next week, you wash it off and you put it next to your bed. Yeah.
You put it on your nightstand.

Speaker 7 Or you just throw it back out in the backyard. Yeah, you throw it back in the backyard.

Speaker 4 Let's forget about it entirely. All right.

Speaker 1 Let's do the rest of the slate on Sunday.

Speaker 1 And we'll start with the Cincinnati Bengals have won a football game. Congrats to

Speaker 1 them. Roof guy can come off his roof.

Speaker 4 He's so pissed off now.

Speaker 1 I saw that video.

Speaker 1 That was the biggest bullshit that he was claiming he was on his roof.

Speaker 4 Did you see it? No, I didn't see it.

Speaker 1 He was in an attic in his bar, his restaurant.

Speaker 4 Jesus, that guy had it made.

Speaker 1 He made a man cave, and he, like we guessed, he just wanted to get away from his family.

Speaker 1 So now he's got the worst Sunday scaries because the Bengals won, and he has to leave his little tree house and go back to his family thinking, like, ooh, maybe we'll go 0-16.

Speaker 1 I can spend all offseason and summer just hanging out at my bar.

Speaker 4 Yeah, he has to quit being a roof guy. That's a tough lifestyle to give up right there.
Yes, so thoughts and prayers to him.

Speaker 4 Once again, the Bengals prove that they are the best team in the NFL at tanking. Yep.
Because they win one game that they could afford to win.

Speaker 4 They still have a commanding one-game lead on the, what are we calling it? The Burrow Bowl?

Speaker 1 Yes. The Chase Young slash Burrow Burrow Bowl.

Speaker 4 Yeah, somebody from Ohio. The Young Burrow Bowl is going to stay in state.
But yeah, it's a good win for them to have because it really did nothing for their placement.

Speaker 4 And it continued the Cincinnati tradition of helping the Bills get into the playoffs. Yes.
Something that Andy Dalton is very, very good at.

Speaker 1 Yes. And the Jets.
Now, that was so Jets. That was so, so Jets.
A stereotype.

Speaker 1 We're going to get to another stereotypical game with the Browns and Steelers, but this is like in the Jets' DNA to have a quarterback who seems like the guy say, we're going to run the table, the playoffs are still there, rattle off three straight wins where they score 34 points in every single game, and then go to Cincinnati and 0-11 team and score six points and just piss down their leg.

Speaker 1 I'm sorry, Jets fans. That is so Jets.
That is so, so Jets. And not only that, but the Jets now have let two teams that were 0-7 or worse get their first win of the year.

Speaker 1 The Dolphins won their first game of the year against the Jets when they were 0-7. The Bengals are 0-11, and they beat the Jets for their first win of the year.

Speaker 4 That's pretty bad. The Jets are medicine.
They're medicine for winless teams.

Speaker 1 Unbelievable. Yeah, not great.

Speaker 4 So

Speaker 4 I don't know. I thought that the Jets did have a chance once Sam Darnold said he was going to run the table.
Once they started doing it, I was thinking maybe.

Speaker 4 Yeah, this was just. And Cincinnati is a weird place to play.
It always looks 10 degrees colder there than it really is. The helmets are cool.
The helmets are awesome. Always cool.

Speaker 4 Andy Halton's coming back. He's very well rested.

Speaker 1 Oh, he looked great. He looked happy.
It was, it was, did you just see the Bengals? I feel like it's one of those things. We root for funny things to happen.
We root for ties.

Speaker 1 We root for weird things. I don't root for 0-16 because that's just so demoralizing.
Yeah.

Speaker 4 I was upset when the Browns did it a couple years ago because to me, that's always the Lions making up a carry. That should be theirs.
Right.

Speaker 4 But Hugh Jackson was like, you know, an accelerant for the fire there.

Speaker 4 And so that should almost, they should have an asterisk by their own 16 season because you can put Hugh on any team and you will be in danger of losing every game.

Speaker 1 Speaking of which, Hugh has been reported to possibly be the new offensive coordinator for the Arizona State Sun Devils.

Speaker 4 I love it. So many life lessons.
Hugh's great life lessons, guys.

Speaker 1 How quickly do you think, how many years before Hugh undermines Herm and gets that job?

Speaker 4 Well, Herm's probably going to have to say you play to win the game to Hugh a couple times to remind him that's actually what we're trying to do.

Speaker 1 Herm is mysteriously in two years going to be like, you know what? The passion is gone for me for coaching. I'm going to be the AD and Hugh's going to be the new coach.
Like, what happened?

Speaker 1 And then Hugh's going to finish last in the Pac-12 South six years in a row and still have a job.

Speaker 4 I mean, Herm seems like he was built to be an AD of a school like Arizona State.

Speaker 1 Like, go golfing.

Speaker 4 Are you

Speaker 4 going to go to the bottom?

Speaker 1 You're doing Hugh Jackson's bidding for him. Yeah.
That's the first thing he's going to say. He'd be like, Herm, you look good for an AD.
What is that supposed to mean?

Speaker 1 Well, you know, you're a little old for a coach.

Speaker 4 Yeah, play 36 holes today, Herm.

Speaker 1 That's fine.

Speaker 4 I'm going to handle the offense and you've earned some

Speaker 1 recruit? Come on. Did you see that?

Speaker 4 Andy Dalton just today, he got into first place all-time for the touchdowns, uh, the all-time touchdown list for the Bengals.

Speaker 4 I thought that he would have had that four years ago. Congrats to Andy.

Speaker 1 Who knows who he passed for? A better year for him.

Speaker 4 Who would he have passed for that?

Speaker 1 This is Dalton is playing for a job next year. Like, these are tryouts.
Chris Collinsworth.

Speaker 7 Carson?

Speaker 4 Chris Collinsworth is wide receiver. He was a wide receiver.

Speaker 7 Carson Boomer.

Speaker 1 Carson Palmer? Carson Palmer? Yeah, Palmer. No, but then he got hurt.
Kimo von Olhofen or whatever the fuck. Yeah.
Kind of ended that whole thing.

Speaker 4 Achille Smith?

Speaker 1 Yeah. Maybe.
Okay.

Speaker 4 Yeah, that's about Boomer. Boomer size.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I said Boomer.

Speaker 1 I would imagine Boomer's number two.

Speaker 1 How pissed do you think Boomer is to be online right now and just have everyone reply, okay, Boomer? Okay, Boomer.

Speaker 4 Everything. It's very tough.

Speaker 1 He's got to be going crazy because he's also an actual boomer, so he probably doesn't fully understand what's going on. But then also people are saying, okay, boomer.

Speaker 4 It's boomer squared.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Do you remember?

Speaker 4 There was like a hot week where Chris Berman got on Twitter.

Speaker 4 He was? And yeah, he was on Twitter for a little bit and then was like, I have no idea what I'm doing.

Speaker 1 We need to do like a history smart move. Mark May's Twitter.
I wonder if he's still on Twitter.

Speaker 1 Ken Anderson.

Speaker 4 Mark May was

Speaker 4 shockingly more coherent on Twitter than he is in real life, which is saying something because his tweets sound like Peter Gammon's tweets on Astronomy.

Speaker 1 Yeah, Mark May was definitely a broken links guy. He is a boomer.

Speaker 4 Mark May is just like, if you're looking for

Speaker 4 a definition.

Speaker 1 I think he still is sitting in a studio somewhere where the cameras aren't on. Yeah.
But he and

Speaker 1 Lou Holtz are just screaming at each other.

Speaker 4 They're just yelling at each other and each other's spit is going into the other guy's mouth.

Speaker 1 Making like slight digs at each other about Pitt and Notre Dame like anyone cares about either school anymore. Yeah, they're irrelevant.
Okay, so that was Jets Bengals. Congrats to the Bengals.

Speaker 1 Bengals fans, you deserve this one. It just sucks to be 0-16.
So you won one game, and that's good. And you still have the first pick.

Speaker 1 All right, next up, the hottest team in the NFL. Possibly.
Washington Redgens. No, I was going to say the Titans.
The Tennessee Titans, 31, Colts, 17.

Speaker 1 This is now a Derrick Henry appreciation podcast.

Speaker 1 I dropped that nugget last week where in games past November 10th, since 2017, he is averaging 5.74 yards per carry.

Speaker 1 Essentially, we get to November and December, and people are like, I don't want to to tackle that guy anymore. He has

Speaker 1 149 yards today, and then in his last 16 games, 16 games consecutively, so this going back to last year, obviously, 1,700 yards, 18 rushing touchdowns.

Speaker 1 Doesn't get talked about as like one of the top backs, but he's up there now.

Speaker 4 That's pretty crazy. Yeah, I mean, imagine trying to tackle Derrick Henry when it's nice outside.
No. And then imagine, you know, that feeling that you get?

Speaker 4 Have you ever been hit in the ear on a cold day with like a football or a soccer ball or something like that?

Speaker 4 That's That's like your entire body when you're trying to tackle Derrick Henry when the temperature gets below 40 degrees.

Speaker 1 Business decisions when it comes to tackling Derrick Henry. Do you know?

Speaker 4 I would strictly try to tackle him by his ponytail.

Speaker 1 That's it. Did you know Derrick Henry's nickname?

Speaker 4 The train. No.
The D-Train.

Speaker 1 No, you're close. Different language.
I didn't know this. I was doing a little research.
I think this is one of those like deep internet and Titans fans only. Tractor Cito.

Speaker 4 Tractor Cito, like the Little Tractor.

Speaker 1 He's the Little Tractor from it It was from the Sugar Bowl in 2014. The ESPN Deportes announcers were calling him Tractor Ceto.

Speaker 4 Tractor Cito. And he chews up turf.

Speaker 1 And funny enough, I searched it, and Titans fans were talking about Tractor Ceto today.

Speaker 4 That is an awesome nickname. That's pretty sweet.

Speaker 1 It needs to be like...

Speaker 1 People need to know about Tractor Ceto more than... I'm sure there are people who know, and I'm not trying to say like it's this underground thing, but more people need to know about Tractor Cito.

Speaker 4 Yeah, that is a sweet nickname. He needs to step on that and start doing some trademarking.
Yeah. Sell some teacher, or we can sell some t-shirts.
We could sell some tractor.

Speaker 1 We're going to cut him in on it. Because we are a Derrick Henry podcast.

Speaker 4 We are. Shout out to the Titans.
Yeah, their podcast is mad at me now, too. Oh, really? Not just you.
Yeah, Will Compton. Actually, I'm going to start calling it.
It's Will Compton's podcast.

Speaker 1 Okay. Busting with the Boys.
Why are they upset?

Speaker 4 Because I said we got into a beef with their podcast.

Speaker 1 And they started the beef. Yeah, they started the beef.

Speaker 4 So I actually like Will Compton. So I'm just going to say it's Will Compton's podcast.

Speaker 1 And we believe in the Titans. And we are Mike Vrabel.
We're probably the only ones. I think I went viral in Titans Twitter a few weeks ago because we basically said the Titans stink except for Vrabel.

Speaker 1 And I guess there's some Titans fans who don't like Mike Vrabel. Well, guess what? We don't like you.
That challenge. We like everyone else.
The challenge saw us was kids. Yes.
Yes.

Speaker 1 How can you not?

Speaker 4 That was a better throw than Marcus Mariota has had all year.

Speaker 1 Now, Ryan Tannehill. Is this it? Yeah, he's taking the next step before our very eyes.

Speaker 4 We joke about the next step with Tannehill. It's been happening slowly for the last four years.
It's been like a Euro step. It's taken forever to develop, but he's actually good now.

Speaker 1 He threw that deep ball. I can't remember.
It was, I can't remember what quarter it was, but he threw like a 40-yard deep ball that I was like, wait, Ryan Tannehill? Yeah. Is this it? This is the guy?

Speaker 1 So apparently it takes seven years, six years, whatever it has been, a couple franchises, a couple benchings to fully realize your, you know, everything you have in you. Ryan Tannehill is here.

Speaker 1 He is now.

Speaker 1 This is the dangerous part, though. The Titans are going to do the like three-year,

Speaker 1 not mega contract, but like three-year, 15 million a year contract for Ryan Tannehill being like, he's the guy. And then next year he goes back to Ryan Tannehill.

Speaker 4 It's a strong possibility. But I also think that Vrabel is one of those coaches that probably doesn't love quarterbacks, no matter who they are.

Speaker 1 Yep.

Speaker 4 Since he's a, you know, he had enough flags thrown on him while he was actually playing when he hit a quarterback like a second too late, where he still has that lingering resentment towards anyone that throws a football.

Speaker 1 So,

Speaker 4 I could see him making him like a bridge deal, carry him over to the next guy. But, yeah, I mean, if they give Tannehill like $120 million this offseason, that's a recipe for disaster.

Speaker 4 I'll say this, though. But I agree with it.

Speaker 1 I watched him. I'm like, Brian Tannehill.

Speaker 4 You got a hot quarterback.

Speaker 4 He's doing it. You got to stick with him.
I think the Titans might win a playoff game. They're real motherfuckers to play against.

Speaker 1 They are.

Speaker 4 They're real motherfuckers.

Speaker 1 They are like

Speaker 1 their defense runs around and flies around. And like we said, Derrick Henry, no one wants to tackle that guy.

Speaker 1 They are officially in that six-seed spot where it's them or the Steelers at this point. And it feels like either of those teams, maybe not the Steelers as much, but their defense is awesome,

Speaker 1 could officially make some noise. Because the Titans, we talked about it, though, that game they played against the Chiefs where they won at the end, that was the turn-the-corner game.

Speaker 1 And the rest of their schedule is not easy, but they basically control their own destiny because they have the Texans twice coming down the stretch

Speaker 1 yeah so they play the texans two out of the last three weeks of the season they have at the raiders next week now that's one of those games that if they don't that's a portal game they got to beat the raiders then they're for real then they're for really real i don't know so they're what seven and five now seven and five seven and five so they have to they have to at least split it with the texans right and then they'll be and they have the raiders and saints in between those that's going to be tough to do uh but i saints at home i'll put it this way if i'm mike vrabel i'm a little bit nervous I'm going to have to cut my dick off.

Speaker 4 I really am. He is the MVP of that team because

Speaker 4 he's a pretty good coach, I think, and he gets his penalty. No, be careful.

Speaker 1 People are going to get mad at you in Titans Twitter.

Speaker 4 Okay, sorry.

Speaker 1 We love him.

Speaker 4 Let me rephrase this. Mike Vrabel is the coach to the Tennessee Titans, and I don't want to say anything to offend anyone online.

Speaker 1 And we personally love him. Yes.
Yes, someone took the video and tweeted it, and just all Titans fans, for like a whole day, I had Titans fans in my mentions being like, you're a fucking idiot.

Speaker 1 You get paid to talk about sports. I'm like, yeah, kind of, but not really.
I get paid to basically

Speaker 1 admit my bias openly.

Speaker 4 Listen, there are two types of coaches in the NFL.

Speaker 4 One is like an offensive guru, a mad scientist that's going to put points up and innovate and do crazy shit and make you like crap yourself because these are routes that I've never seen a wide receiver run before.

Speaker 4 And then the second type is just kind of a grinder coach that's able to get his players to play hard in certain situations.

Speaker 4 And Mike Vrabel is probably the best of the grinder coaches.

Speaker 1 And the third type is coaches that we are personally friendly with. We will always have their back.

Speaker 4 And so he's two out of three of those.

Speaker 1 Yeah, so he checks all the boxes for us. Adam Vindeteri,

Speaker 1 this is sad. I know that two of his kicks were blocked, and he missed one.
He had two blocked. I don't know.
This feels...

Speaker 1 One of those things. I don't know what Jim Ursa is doing.

Speaker 1 The Colts season is now over. They're not going to make the playoffs.
They're 6-6, and they've lost. They're kind of stumbling here.
I think they've lost 4 out of of five.

Speaker 1 But what are you doing, like basically giving up a portion of the game willingly because a guy is a legend and he is a legend? He's a Hall of Famer. But what are you doing?

Speaker 4 If you can make Jim Ursay cry with emotion to the point where he doesn't want to cut you because he'll weep openly, he'll just keep you around. You can have a job for as long as you like.

Speaker 1 It's crazy. It's crazy that he is still out there kicking fields.

Speaker 4 One of those kicks, though, it looked like when you're playing a video game and you turn offsides off and you just stand in front of the holder and you put like two guys. That's what it looked like.

Speaker 4 Yes. Like the kick never had a chance to get off the ground.
No.

Speaker 1 And we were saying that we were guessing that because the offensive line and the special teams is like, he's going to miss anyway, let's just not block. Yeah.
Yeah.

Speaker 4 I mean, whatever. You're just demoralized.

Speaker 1 You're like, yeah, we don't want to, we actually don't want to embarrass Adam Vinotari anymore by missing this kick.

Speaker 4 Let's just let him block. That's very, very nice of us to do that.

Speaker 1 By the way, Titans, Twitter, if you want to clip any of this, you can do it at barcelgold.com slash PMT. So go ahead.
You've got to sign up for barcelgold.com slash PMT and then clip away.

Speaker 4 Did I mention last week that it was Will Muschamp that took Derrick Henry and tried to turn him into a linebacker?

Speaker 1 No.

Speaker 4 Yeah, so Will Muskamp, when he was recruiting him, was like, yeah, you're going to play my position. You're going to be one of my guys.
And Mike Vrabel is essentially just like

Speaker 4 a much smarter version of Will Muskamp. Yes, that makes...

Speaker 1 Well, no, I was going to say less wet, but not really.

Speaker 4 No, he's exactly as wet.

Speaker 1 Yes, he's of the same moistness.

Speaker 4 Smoother brain.

Speaker 1 Yes, definitely. Definitely smoother brain.
All right.

Speaker 4 He's like what Will Muschamp thinks he looks like when he looks in the mirror. In the mirror, yeah.

Speaker 1 He's like, damn,

Speaker 4 you are a leader of men, Will.

Speaker 1 You really can bench a lot. Yeah.
And then he gets up there and it's like everyone's just helping him. His players are just helping get the bar up.

Speaker 4 Will Muschamp would go. He's the biggest coach in 550.
He would make an entire team out of linebackers if he had a chance. Yes.

Speaker 1 All right. Next up, we have Eagles Dolphins.
No one wants to win the NFC East.

Speaker 4 It's the cursed monkeys' paws.

Speaker 1 What? What?

Speaker 4 This is like a cursed monkey's paw. It's like, you know.

Speaker 1 The whole thing, Cursed monkeys paws. How about this paw?

Speaker 4 It's like they're playing hot potato with a hand grenade.

Speaker 1 What is a cursed monkey's paw?

Speaker 4 It's like it looks like it's good. A monkey's paw has the three wishes on it, and you get the wish on it.

Speaker 1 I'm not familiar with it. But it's cursed.

Speaker 4 You need to watch more Simpsons. Okay.
So if you have the cursed monkey's paw, it looks like a great thing because you get three wishes out of it.

Speaker 4 But the trick is all the wishes come with something really bad. So they're treating it like it's something that should be nice, but they don't really want to have it.

Speaker 1 Do you think people who, and I love The Simpsons. I never was like the diehard Simpsons fan.
They're obviously diehard diehard Simpsons fans.

Speaker 1 Do you think at some point in like 30 years, there'll just be a group of people that only talk in Simpsons

Speaker 1 episodes?

Speaker 4 I think it's starting to happen.

Speaker 1 Because there are those very diehard who just reference something. You're like, huh? Oh, okay.
Yeah, I just forgot that that's a thing.

Speaker 4 I would say 20 years from now,

Speaker 4 society is mostly going to be made up of Simpsons and office references.

Speaker 1 Are the Simpsons still running?

Speaker 1 Yeah, but not really. Okay.

Speaker 4 That's crazy. They're like grinding to a slow.

Speaker 1 They're just still out there doing their thing.

Speaker 4 Because they're like the Adam Viniti

Speaker 4 of Fox Comedy. You can't fire The Simpsons.

Speaker 1 Yeah, you can't fire them.

Speaker 4 They get a few kicks blocked every month, and yeah, they'll just stick around for a while.

Speaker 1 It will basically be like a Jeep wave in 30 years, where just guys will just be saying Simpsons, obscure Simpsons reference and be like, oh, yeah. And that's why I also watched The Simpsons.

Speaker 4 And that's our analysis of the NFC East.

Speaker 1 It sucks.

Speaker 1 First monkeys paw.

Speaker 4 I want to say this. Take away a playoff game.
Take away the home playoff game from the team that wins the NFC East.

Speaker 1 Well, this is like the...

Speaker 4 They don't deserve it.

Speaker 1 This is the famous, what was it, 2009 or 10 when the NFC West had their winner finish 7-9, and it was the last night of the season when it was the Seahawks and the Rams.

Speaker 1 Seahawks won a playoff game, though. That was Marshall.
Yeah, that was Beastquake. But yeah, this division is a joke.
The Eagles go into Miami.

Speaker 1 in a must-win because everyone's looked at the Eagles schedule and like, oh, they can basically win out because they play no one and they lose. And guess what? They got Fitzmagick.

Speaker 1 We finally got our full-on Fitzmagic game.

Speaker 1 We've had close calls with Fitzmagic. He's won games where it's like the opponent maybe wasn't very good.
This was a full-on Fitzmagic game. He threw 345 yards.

Speaker 1 He also threw a touchdown against the Eagles, and he's done that with seven different franchises.

Speaker 4 That was the most impressive season.

Speaker 1 He's the Eagle killer.

Speaker 1 He is the Eagle killer.

Speaker 1 He's done it with the Rams, Bengals, Bills, Dolphins, Texans, jets and bucks he needs to go to the eagles and some and then throw a pick six yeah throw a pick six and complete the whole thing throw a touchdown against the eagles from the eagles yeah so uh credit to brian flores because i don't know how you can actively tank be as bad as the dolphins have been at some points in the season and still have guys trying but he does and he ran the coolest trick play the colts punt from like 10 five years ago that we always make fun of they ran that and they scored yeah their kicker caught a touchdown it was incredible.

Speaker 4 Which is nuts. And Devontae Parker also had two touchdowns and 159 yards.
But if you're actively trying to tank, you don't run that play, or do you?

Speaker 4 Are you like, there's no way that I'm going to complete a pass from my holder or whatever to my kicker?

Speaker 1 Well, so that trick play was so genius because it basically

Speaker 1 it went against human nature. So human nature, when you watch the play,

Speaker 1 everyone on the line just saw a guy that they could like absolutely crush and no one was blocking and they all just started rushing at him as fast as they could and left

Speaker 1 who caught it, the kicker?

Speaker 4 Yeah, it was the kicker.

Speaker 1 The kicker caught it in the end zone.

Speaker 4 Their punter Matt Hack. Matt Hack threw a touchdown pass today, and their kicker caught it.
Their kicker's name is,

Speaker 4 let's see, Jason Sanders caught it.

Speaker 1 Great.

Speaker 4 One touchdown. Oh, man, I have him on my face.
One target.

Speaker 1 Yeah, do you get credit for that?

Speaker 4 No, I don't think that you do.

Speaker 1 I don't think you do, but I know there are some people, because we're getting to, I think this is the week before the playoffs, there are people who are writing strongly worded emails.

Speaker 4 To Matthew Barrett.

Speaker 1 To Yahoo, to CBS, to ESPN.

Speaker 4 Fix this now.

Speaker 1 Fix it. Fix the scoring.
The DeAndre Hopkins touchdown. People are freaking about that.
Freaking out. This is big-time freak out about points, you know, decimal points of scoring, which that...

Speaker 1 It matters. I know we do the don't care about your fantasy team, but that I actually will support people in when at the end of the season, like kneel downs, all those weird scoring things.

Speaker 1 Right when you get to the playoffs, that matters.

Speaker 4 Dude, they didn't credit DeAndre Hopkins with a passing touchdown yet yet yet that might be adjusted after the fact yeah now do the do the player know that you can yes you can if if they they they adjust it usually like on Tuesday mornings I've had that happen in a league before where you win and then Tuesday morning comes and it's like whoops you lost so they need they need Amazon web services to come in or next-gen stats or whatever and figure out that that ball went like a quarter of a yard forward yeah and then they'll credit them yes I like that so yeah it was a it was a touchdown pass to their kicker kicker.

Speaker 4 I like your theory on it that you send the most hittable player out there running with the ball.

Speaker 1 He's like fresh meat.

Speaker 4 Yeah, they should just send

Speaker 4 the dorkiest-looking player on the team should do that.

Speaker 1 Everyone just left their assignment. It was like, I want to fucking kill this kicker.

Speaker 1 And he just left, or the holder, and he left the kicker wide open in the end zone. It was a genius play.

Speaker 4 I'm trying to think of who's the most hittable player in the NFL. It might be Morstead on the Saints just because he's got those boxy shoulder pads.

Speaker 1 Ah, Cody Parky.

Speaker 4 Cody Parky. But

Speaker 4 you want to make sure that he stays in the game, though.

Speaker 1 Yeah, that's true.

Speaker 1 That's true.

Speaker 1 Hmm. That's a good question.
Who is a pitchable face? Mike Lennon, but he's a quarterback, so it's not a trick play. Although it kind of is a trick play,

Speaker 1 Mason Rudolph.

Speaker 4 Mason Rudolph. That's true.
Yeah, he might get hit in the face with a helmet. It went one step too far.

Speaker 1 Maybe that's the trick play the Steelers have: they have Mason Rudolph running a play where he only has the old school single bar mask, so you can really see his face.

Speaker 1 Yeah, no, he would get destroyed. Oh, fuck that.

Speaker 1 The NFC East is 16 and 32 combined.

Speaker 4 Yeah. Relegate the last place team to the Big Ten.

Speaker 1 Incredible, incredible, and the Redskins are still alive.

Speaker 4 Very much still alive.

Speaker 1 Incredible, incredible, incredible that that is how.

Speaker 1 I mean, the Cowboys had a meltdown, and we're going to talk about the Thanksgiving games in a little bit here, but the Cowboys had a meltdown on Thursday, and then come Sunday, they're like, oh, you're still in first place and still have a commanding lead.

Speaker 4 I would like to apologize to Eagles fans because I've been giving them a little bit of a hard time because they are the first ones to get down on their team when anything goes wrong.

Speaker 4 Like, I'm talking about the smallest misstep. They're like, fire everybody.
This team stinks. They're garbage.
You were right. You were dead right.
You were dead right. I was wrong.

Speaker 4 But it's like having, you're probably like this with Stella, your dog. Stella barks at everything.
So you kind of tune her out for a while.

Speaker 4 And then when somebody does break into your house and she's barking, you're like, Stella, not now. I'm trying to go to sleep.
And then it turns out that there was an intruder.

Speaker 4 The Eagles fans were right barking early about this team because they do not look good in really any facet of the game.

Speaker 1 And the Eagles have the double whammy right now where

Speaker 1 you have the quarterback that you let go in Nick Foles, who

Speaker 1 I still am very much in the Carson Wentz is a lot better than Nick Foles.

Speaker 1 We'll get to Nick Foles in a bit, but you let the quarterback who won the Super Bowl go, and you also, the theory is the smart guys that helped you win that Super Bowl are now in Indianapolis and Frank Reich.

Speaker 1 So if you're an Eagles fan, you're sitting there like, wait, we got the wrong quarterback and the wrong coach.

Speaker 1 That's the worst case doomsday scenario. I'm not saying that's what it is, but that thought is going through Philadelphia right now.

Speaker 4 Yeah, because it doesn't get much worse than losing to the Dolphins. No,

Speaker 1 you have to win every game. You have to win every game.
I just hope that we get an 8-8 division winner.

Speaker 4 I mean, we might get a 7-9.

Speaker 1 That is going to be very hard to do, but god damn it, I want it. I want it.
I want it.

Speaker 1 All right. Next up, before actually we do Packers Giants, I want to talk to you guys about a leading blended Scotch whiskey.
You know the name I'm about to say.

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Speaker 1 Chivvis 13 Manchester United Special Edition is the first 13-year-old scotch to be released by Chivis Regal.

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Chivus Regal is the world's first luxury whiskey, renowned for its benchmark quality and taste, style, substance, and exclusivity.

Speaker 1 Chivus Regal believes that blended is better in life and in scotch. We actually got some bottles.
They gave it to us, and I have mine sitting at my desk. I've had a few sips, and it is delightful.

Speaker 4 I enjoyed something the other night.

Speaker 1 Yeah, Chivis Regal is delicious. Okay.

Speaker 1 Packers Giants, snow game. Big time snow game.
And the fake lines. I didn't like that.
Oh. I didn't like the fake lines.
Oh, that's stupid.

Speaker 1 No, it was stupid. Yeah.
Yeah, it was dumb.

Speaker 1 It looked fake.

Speaker 1 No, they were fake, but it looked extra fake.

Speaker 4 When I see a snow game, I want the mystery. I don't want to know where the yard lines are.
That's half the fun.

Speaker 1 And I want the shovels to come out

Speaker 1 and the guy with the snowplow to come out or

Speaker 1 the leaf blowers to walk around with the leaf blowers. But yeah, so if you didn't watch this game, there was a moment where Fox basically did like,

Speaker 1 it looked like the illuminated puck back in the late 90s that the NHL tried to do with Fox. And they had like illuminated yard markers, and it was so bad.

Speaker 1 They actually, I think it was one of those situations where enough people complained on Twitter that they changed it.

Speaker 4 Dad, not only was it the numbers, but it was also like the hash marks were all individually grayed out. It was terrible.
Let me enjoy the snow. Let me enjoy the snow.

Speaker 4 That is, you know, with global warming taking over the entire world, one of the last comforts that I have

Speaker 4 is snow football. Snow.
Don't take away my pure snow football from me. I hate it.
And I want to send a big fuck you to my cable company, too. Yeah.
Big fuck you for making me watch this game.

Speaker 1 Well, we do live in New York.

Speaker 4 Yeah, but fuck you. I should have the option.

Speaker 4 Choice is important right now. It's 2016.
I should be able to watch the 49ers Ravens game

Speaker 4 and not have to watch Pat Shermer refuse to put Eli Manning in the game, even though Daniel Jones sucks now.

Speaker 4 I couldn't believe I was watching the entirety of the Packers Giants game and the Jets-Bengals game as my only options.

Speaker 1 You know what I did this morning, which I love to do once we get to December and you have snow football in the elements, so to speak? I walked outside and gave myself a little scouting report.

Speaker 4 Oh, checked it out.

Speaker 1 Yeah, just checked it out. Just like, okay, all right, well, there's a little hail coming.
I don't know. Maybe I still got my bet wrong, but I did do the scouting report, Boots on the Ground,

Speaker 1 which I live not close to the Metal Lane.

Speaker 4 It's about 45 minutes away.

Speaker 1 I actually, it was like coming down in droves during the game and nothing outside my window. But still, Boots on the Ground.
I did my scouting report.

Speaker 4 It was a little bit weird watching that game on TV with all the snow and then looking out your window and there's nothing.

Speaker 1 Well, it's like one of the great things in life.

Speaker 1 If you live in an NFL city, city you walk out on sunday morning and you feel like uh you know like vince lombardi you just walk you maybe hand in your pockets just kind of sniff in the air maybe toss a little grass just feel what the wind's going to be like what the what the elements are going to be like so that you can feel like you have an insider knowledge even though we have weather apps that give you like to the minute accurate data I still want to get the feel of it.

Speaker 1 Right.

Speaker 4 It actually smells different. Yeah.

Speaker 4 And it smelled like an undergame.

Speaker 1 I bet the over, but it did have the under smell too. Well, I always do the snow tricks my brain because I'm like,

Speaker 1 it's one of those things where if you are gambling on sports, you can basically convince yourself anything.

Speaker 1 Like short rest, you can convince yourself, oh, well, they're tired, so there'll be points, or, oh, they're tired, so they won't be able to run their offense. Snow, I'm always like, the defense slips.

Speaker 4 You know how we always talk about different quarterbacks that aren't good in the cold weather?

Speaker 1 Like,

Speaker 4 who have we put on that list? Derek Carr?

Speaker 1 Derek Carr is big time.

Speaker 4 A couple other guys with small hands. Matt LaFleur does not look comfortable in cold weather.

Speaker 1 This is bad because he's a coach of the Green Bay Pack.

Speaker 4 He looks like a little snow bunny all wrapped up and he's ready to get off the slopes.

Speaker 1 He doesn't have enough weight. He's, he, I mean, not to go like Jewish grandmother on him, but he looks like he's starving.

Speaker 4 He's all skinny.

Speaker 1 He needs to eat. Eat, eat, eat.
Come on.

Speaker 1 So, this game, let's actually talk about the game.

Speaker 1 Daniel Jones stinks, and Pat Shermer is a dead man walking. Pat Shermer, update on where Pat Shermer is with the entire New York Giants organization.

Speaker 1 He is at the level where he's talking about how they're a historically young team.

Speaker 1 So that is the last bargaining level of a coach about to get fired where they continually tell you how young their team is and how it's a process.

Speaker 1 And he said, at some point, we'll be good enough to win.

Speaker 1 You won't be here for that. But yes, you're right.
At some point, the Giants will win again.

Speaker 4 It might not be this year. It might not be next year.
They've got to develop their guys.

Speaker 1 Historically young.

Speaker 4 They are a young team.

Speaker 4 They've drafted well, but they have to develop those players and see how they pan out at this level. So, yeah, hey, listen, let Pat Shermer stick around for a while because I enjoy watching him lose.

Speaker 4 I don't know what it is about Pat Shermer, but he's got

Speaker 4 threatening.

Speaker 1 He thinks he's smarter than everyone else. He always makes the wrong decision.
He even had the moment today where he was down three scores and could use a field goal and didn't kick a field goal.

Speaker 1 The game was over, but it was like, this is actually the time that you kick a field goal to extend the game. And he went for it in field goal range.

Speaker 4 He doesn't have a chart, he has no chart. He needs a chart guy.

Speaker 4 His chart guy, he actually thinks that astrology is what tells him whether or not to score points or not, because you're right, he makes the wrong decision consistently.

Speaker 4 Consistently, it's shocking how often he gets it wrong.

Speaker 1 He's like someone who pulls out a compass and then follows it, and then it realizes it's a Fisher-Price compass, and it's actually the North Pole is stuck in one location.

Speaker 4 Well, as an office reference, he like follows the GPS into the lake. There you go.
He's like, this is where it told me to go.

Speaker 1 Nice, nice. Dwight Trute.
No, Michael Scott.

Speaker 4 Michael Scott featuring Dwight Trot

Speaker 1 and a rental car. Yeah.

Speaker 1 So, yeah, Daniel Jones, I don't know if you're a Giants fan, I think you can do for the rest of the year, you can do the well-he's young.

Speaker 1 But if you are not concerned about the fact that he, at minimum, has like three turnovers a game, and it's always a, it could be two fumbles, it could be three picks, who knows?

Speaker 1 You got to be at least a little nervous.

Speaker 4 Yeah, there's, I mean, there hasn't really been that much to root for for Daniel Jones since that first victory that he had, right? Yes. Like, besides that, what good has he done?

Speaker 1 He walks in with his Brooks brothers shirt.

Speaker 7 That's

Speaker 7 it.

Speaker 1 Didn't get mono.

Speaker 4 He's not making out with girls in season.

Speaker 1 Because I think he definitely has his girlfriend from like

Speaker 4 seventh grade.

Speaker 1 Yeah, and he's going to get married soon. But it's going to be weird how long he waits to get married, but he's still going to get married soon.

Speaker 4 It sounds about right.

Speaker 4 You're right. His look showing up to games.
Backhack. It's something.
It's something.

Speaker 1 He does look like he's getting off like the school bus for picture day right every so there you go that's memorable that he's done that um the only other thing i wrote down was alan lazard uh had a big day and i'm very excited for him to be uh good for maybe a little bit for the packers and then leave and uh bash aaron rodgers every chance he gets on twitter and random fox you know calling coward show and whatnot that'll be nice for you that's going to be fun because that's i feel like that he's the he is the next uh who does it Greg Jennings?

Speaker 1 No, does Greg Jennings say? No, he doesn't usually say stuff. Who's the guy who always says shit? Fuck.
The Packers receiver? Shannon Sharp. No, the Packers receiver who always bashes Aaron Rodgers.

Speaker 1 Why can't I think of his name right now? It was a tight end. It was a tight end.
Jimmy Graham. No, Martellis Bennett.
No, someone's got it.

Speaker 4 They go through a lot of tight ends. Jermichael Finley.
Yes. Yeah, Jermichael Finley.

Speaker 1 Yes. That's the new one.
Thank you.

Speaker 4 Although I'm sure Martellis Bennett would bash Aaron Rodgers if you gave him the chance. Yeah, he'd bash anyone.
The entire, yeah, he'd bash the entire program program there.

Speaker 4 So, yeah, they've got Alan Lazar, Devontae Adams at wide receiver. The question is:

Speaker 4 Are his wide receivers bad enough for Aaron Rodgers to feel good about dragging them to victory? Because if he's Devontae Adams, too good. Yeah, he's too good.

Speaker 4 If he plays with a lot of talent at wide receiver and at tight end, then Aaron Rodgers gets pissed off because it's not like he's not the one that dragged this lump of dog shit to greatness. Big time.

Speaker 4 He likes being the guy, and I think that they're too talented for Rodgers to win a Super Bowl this year.

Speaker 1 The The Packers, congrats on winning a game against a really bad team.

Speaker 1 I still think my thoughts on the Packers.

Speaker 4 You still think that they're F-words? I think

Speaker 1 if you talk to, if you look into a Packers fan's eyes and you're like, come on,

Speaker 1 you guys are good, but come on.

Speaker 4 It doesn't feel special. They say that.

Speaker 1 If you can get the truth out of them, they'll be like, you're right. No.
It's not. The team isn't fully complete for that to be the case.

Speaker 4 Shout out to Mercedes-Lewis, though, who caught a touchdown. His first touchdown catch from Aaron Rodgers.

Speaker 1 Did you believe that? He's still alive. Okay.
That's pretty cool.

Speaker 1 All right. Next up, we have the big rivalry game, Steelers-Browns.

Speaker 1 All-time this league. It was the t-shirt war that went on for everyone arriving at the stadium this morning.
It started with Freddie Kitchens over the weekend having a Pittsburgh started it shirt.

Speaker 1 And then we had Bud Dupree wearing a free pouncy shirt.

Speaker 1 And Cameron Sutton had the old, it looked like a Calvin and Hobbes, but it was like a little kid in a Pittsburgh helmet peeing on a Browns player. Yeah.
I loved it.

Speaker 4 Yeah, it was a lot of this league. And also, Jarvis Landry was wearing a revenge shirt.
Yep. Basically, this entire rivalry could be cooled down with a long talk from Mr.

Speaker 4 Rogers about how to talk to our friends and handle disagreements and control our emotions.

Speaker 1 Yes.

Speaker 4 But yeah, they're all very angry at each other. And it turns out that the Steelers defense is really good.
And it turns out... I've been saying it.
It turns out that.

Speaker 1 I love the Steelers' defense.

Speaker 4 Duck Fucks.

Speaker 1 Duck Fucks. So I'm going to say something, trigger warning.
I'm going to say something that our listeners who are Cleveland Browns fans are not going to be happy when I say it, but I have to say it.

Speaker 1 This was the ultimate, this is why the Steelers are the Steelers and the Browns are the Browns game. Because you are on the third string quarterback for the Steelers.
You don't have Juju.

Speaker 1 You don't have James Conner. The Browns are rolling a little bit.

Speaker 1 They come out and they're firing in the first half, and it looks like they're going to win this game and basically have this shot at a playoff spot and run down the stretch, and then they just disappeared.

Speaker 4 Baker hurt his hand, though.

Speaker 1 Baker hurt his hand.

Speaker 4 That's cross-grabbing hand grabbing hand.

Speaker 1 Steelers

Speaker 1 outmanned him. Like it was a physical game where the Steelers just kind of, I'll say it, wanted it more.

Speaker 1 And Freddie Kitchens did a classic Freddie Kitchens where he came out and was like, hey, we're going to run the ball. And then the second half just stopped.
Yeah. Out of nowhere.

Speaker 1 And not because they were down. It was a tie game at half.
And Devlin Hodges making that pass at the end of the half when they couldn't really move the ball. That felt like a dagger.

Speaker 1 But, man, the Browns, like, Browns fans know what I'm saying when I say that.

Speaker 1 Like, this is the Steelers winning this game with their third string quarterback and missing players all over the field is just so classic Pittsburgh versus Cleveland.

Speaker 4 Right. If the Browns were on the right track right now, they would have won this game by 20.
Correct. But they're not on the right track.

Speaker 4 They've got Freddie Kitchens fighting an eternal battle that he'll never win or lose against his own mind. Yes.
So it's not going to end up well. Sucks.

Speaker 4 Watching him defend his shirt, too, the Pittsburgh Star Dead shirt. Yeah.
After the game, it was like, do you just say that? You say that you probably shouldn't have worn that shirt. Yeah.

Speaker 1 But that's also Freddie Kitchens. He doesn't even realize what he's doing.

Speaker 4 How about Marquise Pouncy getting the game ball? Yeah. Lost a spinner.
That was pretty cool.

Speaker 4 Bad message to kids. Yep.
That if you get into a fight, you get rewarded.

Speaker 1 No, a good message, defend your quarterback.

Speaker 4 Even if he's Mason Rudolph. Even if he's Mason Rudolph.

Speaker 1 Even if you don't like his son. No matter what.

Speaker 1 Mike Tomlin's the coach of the year.

Speaker 4 So we could make arguments for a lot of different coaches, too.

Speaker 1 But I'm saying Mike Tomlin's the coach of the year.

Speaker 4 Okay. Because

Speaker 1 what the Steelers, and we have made fun of Mike Tomlin a lot on this podcast. So I think it's only fair to say when he's doing a great job, and what he's done this year has been a fantastic job.

Speaker 1 The fact that the Steelers, with the September they had, with even going back to Antonio Brown and L'Aveon Bell in the offseason and like everything falling apart last year, into this year, Ben getting hurt, Mason Rudolph being a fuckhead, going to their third string quarterback who has Moxie out of his ears.

Speaker 1 I think he's the coach of the year with what he's done with this team. I cannot believe that they are in the playoffs as of right now, and

Speaker 1 if they take care of business down the stretch, they will be the sixth seed. I cannot believe that.

Speaker 4 I would like to go back and retroactively award Coach of the Year to Mike Tomlin for the job that he did last year and the year before, keeping Le'Veon Bell and Antonio Brown somewhat coherently together on the same page on that team, like knowing what we know now about Antonio Brown, the fact that none of this stuff was public, the fact that Antonio Brown, I guess, just now discovered how to use Twitter this offseason.

Speaker 1 And it's a perfect lesson for like fans, and I include myself as obviously a fan, to when we think we know everything, we don't know anything.

Speaker 1 Because we all were making the Mike Tomlin jokes. We all were saying Mike Tomlin is running a circus and he has

Speaker 1 no control of anything, and then he puts together a year like this year, and you're like, whoa, he's got these guys believing no matter what.

Speaker 4 Yeah, he actually knew better than anybody else where that locker is going to be. It's incredible the entire time.

Speaker 4 I made one note here about Duck. Congratulations to Duck, by the way.
So much, Moxie.

Speaker 1 Our Moxie King.

Speaker 4 Our Moxie King, like 9.9 on the Daltometer, or 9.9 Daltons on the Moxie Meter. Yep.
Moxiometer. I think you got it.
Whatever it is.

Speaker 4 Saying, typing Duck Fucks is very hard to do with autocorrect. Yeah.
Very hard. That's like a level 10 challenge, getting that all right on the first time.

Speaker 1 He's also, just a little quicksaber metric for you. Duck, 2-0 in his first starts as Steelers quarterback.
You know who else went 2-0, first two starts, Steelers quarterback? Big Ben. Big Ben.

Speaker 1 So Duck's probably going to win two Super Bowls minimum. I like that.

Speaker 7 December 15th, Bills Steelers, prime time.

Speaker 4 Castle beard flex, but okay.

Speaker 1 Oh,

Speaker 1 nice. Where?

Speaker 8 In Pittsburgh.

Speaker 7 They won't let people bring in Duck calling devices.

Speaker 1 I think that's probably okay. That's fantastic.
That's a very upset. That's a Mubazela law in South Africa.

Speaker 4 Yeah, that could go south very quickly.

Speaker 1 It would be electric, though. It would be electric, but

Speaker 1 we already have one Mississippi State where those stupid cowbells, we don't need just random noises.

Speaker 1 But that's awesome that those Steelers, Bills, and the Steelers are so different than the Steelers of the past because they're now like a plucky underdog.

Speaker 1 And

Speaker 1 I love their defense. I've been in love with their defense for a while now.
It's Bud Dupree, all-time football name. TJ Watt, he's a Watt.

Speaker 4 Benny Snell is also great football name. Benny Snell, great.

Speaker 1 And

Speaker 1 Javon Hargrave, great football name. Like, they got guys that if you just say their names, like, Bud Dupree, you want to fuck with Bud Dupree? No, no, thank you.
Hell no.

Speaker 4 Hell no. No, thank you.
Also, Maka Fitzpatrick is still playing really well. Yep.
It's crazy.

Speaker 8 It's not an intimidating name.

Speaker 1 Make a Fitzpatrick is not an intimidating name. No.

Speaker 4 It implies a certain switch.

Speaker 1 No, no, no.

Speaker 4 What if it was Maka Fitzmagic?

Speaker 1 A little bit more intimidating just because you don't know what's going to happen.

Speaker 4 Also, listen to Hank saying, what isn't an intimidating Henry? Are you still mad about Mitchell? Yeah, still mad.

Speaker 4 I just want to let everyone know who's still mad about it.

Speaker 1 Okay. All right.
Yeah, so Steelers going to make a run at it. What does the Steelers?

Speaker 1 Let's see real quick what the rest of their schedule is because I think they have a couple tough games. But if they make the playoffs.

Speaker 4 While you're looking this up, I just want to say I was very disappointed that there wasn't an actual fight during the game. I know.
I was mad that there wasn't even like a brawl.

Speaker 4 There was no helmet swinging.

Speaker 1 It felt off. Yeah, it did.
It felt off. All right, so they're at the Cardinals.
I would say that's going to be a win.

Speaker 1 And then they have the Bills in prime time and then at the Jets. So they could, you know, the Bills are at home.

Speaker 1 We could be looking at a 10-5 Steelers team in a few weeks with a week 16 game or 17 game against the Ravens, which will probably lose, but that's crazy.

Speaker 4 Well, the one saving grace for the Browns is I don't think that Freddie Kitchens is getting fired after this game.

Speaker 4 He should. He's not going to, though.

Speaker 1 But he should for other games. Not this game.
Cumulative game. Well, this game, too.

Speaker 4 On aggregate, he's reached the point of firing.

Speaker 1 You can't have your team get out-manned.

Speaker 1 Yeah, yeah, I'll give you that.

Speaker 4 You can't.

Speaker 1 When it's time to put your nuts on the table, and your dragon dealers just did that to him, they manned up, and they don't have... I mean, they did it with...
They don't have any wide receivers.

Speaker 1 They don't have it. Like, Benny Snell is good.
I liked him in Kentucky, but he's not James Conner.

Speaker 4 James Washington's not bad, though.

Speaker 1 James Washington's not bad.

Speaker 4 He went hunting with Duck before the game.

Speaker 1 But in their center, and they're missing all these guys, and they're just like, you know what? Fuck it. We're still going to win this game.

Speaker 4 Let's just do and be legends.

Speaker 1 Let's just go full send on the Browns.

Speaker 1 But again, it's why the Steelers are the Steelers, the Browns are the Browns. It hurts, but it's the truth.
Until the Browns can change the narrative, maybe next year. But this is.

Speaker 1 Browns fans are sitting nodding right now. They're probably crying a little bit, but they're also nodding.
And you know what?

Speaker 1 You're Ohio State fans, you're fine. Yeah, you'll be good.

Speaker 1 The few Browns fans that are not Ohio State fans, this is messages for you.

Speaker 4 I'm sorry. It is kind of nice, though, that the Steelers fans also have to deal with being Pirates fans.
Yeah. And being University of Pittsburgh fans.
Yes, that's true. It's God's way of balancing.

Speaker 1 And not have an NBA team. Yeah, you can't.
They wouldn't go to the game. It's the most popular sport in the world.

Speaker 4 They wouldn't go to an NBA game.

Speaker 1 It is like the ratings. The only, you know,

Speaker 4 New England is really the only place that has everything. If you're a Red Sox fan, you're also a Celtics fan.
Well, I guess Washington, D.C.

Speaker 4 You get to be a Mystics fan, a Nationals fan, and a Capitals fan. So everybody's

Speaker 7 Patriots with the other five states of New England. That's true.
So there's Connecticut people that are like also Yankee, or they're like, yeah, they're Yankees and Mets or whatever.

Speaker 4 Who would you, out of the other New England states, who would you say gets like first dibs to

Speaker 4 the Red Sox, but to the Patriots after Boston and Massachusetts does?

Speaker 1 New Hampshire.

Speaker 7 I mean, everyone except for Connecticut. Connecticut, there's too many

Speaker 1 50s and 50s.

Speaker 7 Rhode Island. New Hampshire, Maine, Vermont, and Rhode Island.

Speaker 1 They're all real ones.

Speaker 1 Yeah, Rhode Island. Connecticut can kick cross.
The rough and rowdy and Rhode Island was

Speaker 1 shout out to the Brain Trust at Barstool. And I probably am included in that because I sit in some of these meetings, but we serve tall boys at a rough and rowdy in Providence, Rhode Island.

Speaker 1 And they became missiles. Missiles.

Speaker 1 All right, Redskins, Panthers.

Speaker 1 The Redskins are hot. They have a two-game winning streak.

Speaker 4 The bare minimum required for a winning streak. To be hot, but yes.

Speaker 1 Talk about manned-up football. They ran the ball all over the Panthers, and then they did the exact same thing on the other side of the ball where they sacked Kyle Allen seven times.
They manned up.

Speaker 4 And Dwayne Haskins keeps showing very small incremental signs of improving. Little bits.
By the end of the year, he's going to go like 16 for 30 and one touchdown and no interceptions.

Speaker 1 And not take a selfie after the game.

Speaker 4 Yeah, he didn't take a selfie. He didn't take any plays off this time.

Speaker 1 He got to hand the ball off to to darius geis who's an all-time i'm so happy to watch that player playing well guy yep because he's been injured his entire career so far uh this was also one of those classic games that just snuck up on everyone because the panthers came out hot and you're like okay cool don't have to think about this game panthers easy they won and then all of a sudden the redskins are just hanging around hanging around and and now the panthers are coming for that crown with the chargers chargers still on top but i feel like and someone can fact check me i feel like half of the Panthers' games this year have ended on goal-line situations, where with like five seconds left, they're on the goal line and they just need to score, and they just can't do it.

Speaker 4 I know what happened in

Speaker 4 that Thursday night game, which Christian McCaffrey went out of bounds.

Speaker 1 Yep, and the Packers. Yep, true.
And so that's at least three, at least three times they have just ended a game, like first and goal on the five-yard line, can't get in.

Speaker 4 Yeah, the Panthers, they don't look good. I'm hopeful, well, this is actually the most Redskins thing of all time.

Speaker 4 If they put together a little winning streak at the end of of the year here, and let's say they end 6-10, but they're showing signs of improvement, that Bruce Allen gets to come back next year

Speaker 4 and enjoy more winning off the field during the year. That's actually, they should fire him at the start of the year so we can continue winning in the offseason and doing all the other things.

Speaker 1 I saw a report that Dan Snyder said nothing is off the table for changes in the offseason.

Speaker 4 Including selling the team. Including selling the team.
Numerous, dozens of fans demanded from him.

Speaker 1 Hilarious when an owner says that, when they're like halfway through the season, like, you know what? No one's safe.

Speaker 1 But actually, probably everyone who sucks your dick all the time and like ball washes you is very much safe.

Speaker 4 Well, another thing is Dan Snyder said that, well, not Dan Snyder. Callahan said that they're going to look into getting an analytics department.
Wow. So they are

Speaker 4 coming into the 21st century 20 years too late. Hell no.
That's fine. Better late than never, is what I always say.
But people forget that they were the first NFL team to hire an analytics department.

Speaker 4 And then the guy quit after like a week. He's like, These guys are, and he was like, These guys are such idiots.
I'm leaving.

Speaker 4 Cannot work with Dan Snyder.

Speaker 1 All right, so the Redskins are still alive. The Panthers are very much dead.

Speaker 4 Well, here's the path to the playoffs for the Redskins. It's very simple.
You gotta win out. Very simple.
You gotta win out. You gotta hope that the Eagles lose out.

Speaker 4 You gotta hope that the Cowboys lose out. And then you gotta hope that the Cowboys and the Eagles tie when they play each other.

Speaker 1 I'm rooting for it. It could happen.

Speaker 4 Chaos. I'm not saying that it's going to happen, but I'm saying it's very likely that it will happen.

Speaker 1 You're two wins away from being two wins in the Eagles Cowboys tie away from being in the hunt graphic.

Speaker 4 Well, no, we are technically in the hunt.

Speaker 1 No, you're not. We are officially

Speaker 4 not mathematically illuminated.

Speaker 1 Listen, as someone who's like at the top of the in the hunt and it's thrilling every time they show it, you're not in the hunt.

Speaker 4 Listen, I don't have an analytics department. I can't tell you if we're technically in the hunt or not, but it feels like...

Speaker 1 I think I've taken a screen grab like 17 times in the last two weeks of the Bears.

Speaker 4 in the hunt. It feels like we're less out of the hunt than we were last week.

Speaker 1 Yes.

Speaker 1 You've grabbed your rifle. We packed your hunting.
You've grabbed your rifle and you're hunting dog. You're not out the door yet.

Speaker 4 We packed a cooler. We packed a Yeti up for our friends that are going out to hunt.
And we're like, you come back and we'll cook up whatever you guys catch.

Speaker 1 I've been walking in the woods with my beagle for like three weeks. You're lost.
You're going in the woods. We don't know where we are, but we think we're in the hunt.
Yeah, you're like

Speaker 1 hatchet. There's no bullets in our gun.
Yeah, you're like

Speaker 1 a hatchet.

Speaker 4 You have to be in the hunt to survive. You're peeing on logs and you're learning how to trap bugs.

Speaker 1 We're good. We're in the hunt.

Speaker 1 All right, before we do Bucks Jags, PFT, do you want to talk to us quickly about Peloton? Because usually I would do this, but you are the Peloton guy. And you do the...

Speaker 1 Are we going to get a halftime show?

Speaker 4 I don't know if we're going to halftime show because we're doing the telethon for Cyber Monday.

Speaker 1 Through Cyber Monday, shout out Cyber Monday. We have probably the greatest track suits we've ever created.
Umbros. Umbro track suits.
They look awesome and a ton of new gear.

Speaker 1 Cyber Monday, I think it's going to be 20% off. 20% off.
Cyber Monday.

Speaker 7 Lamar Jackson, some great Lamar Lamar Jackson shirts flying off the shelves.

Speaker 1 We do.

Speaker 4 They're actually almost sold out right now. So if you want to get a Lamar Jackson Elite shirt, now's the time.

Speaker 7 We have DVT shirts that are basically gone. Once they're gone, they're gone forever.

Speaker 1 Gone forever.

Speaker 1 Get those 20% off Cyber Monday, please.

Speaker 1 Anytime you buy part of my take gear, it helps us.

Speaker 1 So go and support us, please. Thank you.
It's a great Christmas gift.

Speaker 4 It's a great Christmas gift. I don't know if I'm going to be doing this.

Speaker 1 If you buy today, it'll actually come by Christmas.

Speaker 7 Yes. Okay, nice.
Anytime after today.

Speaker 1 Guaranteed by Hank. You have to tweet Hank if you don't get it.

Speaker 4 He is in charge of shipping now.

Speaker 4 So I don't know if I'm going to be doing the Peloton halftime show for Monday Night Football. If I'm not, I'll try to bring it back the following week.
Okay.

Speaker 4 But I've been on my Peloton a lot this year. It's been really, it's a great workout.
I've lost probably like 10, 12 pounds, and it's mostly because I'm doing this Peloton. It's in my living room.

Speaker 4 It's perfect. I don't have to worry about walking to the gym.
I don't have to worry about bringing an extra set of clothes. It's right there.
I can work out on it.

Speaker 4 I can hop in the shower and I can get on the subway and come to work in the morning. It's a great workout.

Speaker 4 If you're worried about finding the perfect gift this holiday, you should look into purchasing a Peloton as well. It's the gift that they're guaranteed to love.

Speaker 4 This holiday season, give your loved ones what they really want. Give them the gift of Peloton.
It's a worry-free trial too, which is nice. So they've got a 30-day home trial.

Speaker 4 They can try the bike worry-free for 30 days. And should they decide it's not for them, they can return the bike for a full refund.
Peloton will even come pick it up at no cost.

Speaker 4 It's a gift that they're going to keep on using with an endless variety of entertaining live and on-demand classes, plus motivation from world-class instructors.

Speaker 4 It's the gift that keeps them coming back well beyond the holiday season. It's great because I can get on there.
I can do a live class. If I wake up early enough, I can hop in like the 7.30 a.m.

Speaker 4 class, or if I don't make it on time, I can go and take a class from their library that they have set up of hundreds and hundreds.

Speaker 4 of courses so I can just press start boom I feel like I'm in a class it's got a sweet screen that you set up right in front of yourself as you're on the bike.

Speaker 4 It tells you what your resistance level should be. It tells you what your speed should be.
It tells you how many calories you've burned.

Speaker 4 Tells you what your resistance level is so you can keep up with exactly what the instructor is saying. It saves you time.
It's an efficient, high-intensity cardio workout. You can do right at home.

Speaker 4 You spend less time commuting to your workout or braving the winter weather and more time with people that you love and things that matter. And the gift scales for the entire family.

Speaker 4 So one subscription comes with multiple profiles. The whole home can use it.
From pop rides to metrics rides. There's a workout that every member of the family will love.

Speaker 4 This holiday, give the gift of Peloton for a limited time. Get a hundred bucks off accessories when you purchase the Peloton bike.
Go to onepeloton.com. Use promo code mytake at checkout.

Speaker 4 That's a new code: onepeloton.com. Use promo code mytake at checkout.

Speaker 1 Okay, Bucks Jaguars.

Speaker 1 I wanted to quickly talk about Nick Foles and maybe the strangest NFL career we've ever seen and we ever will see. Okay?

Speaker 1 So Nick Foles got benched today for Gardner Minshew. And rightfully so.
He had three turnovers on the first three possessions for the Jaguars.

Speaker 1 The last guy to do that, Mike Glenn, in week two for the Bears in 2017. Really bad.
Really, really bad. Nick Foles is now, he has gotten benched for Gardner Minshew.

Speaker 1 He transferred schools because of Kirk Cousins.

Speaker 1 He got hurt, but he got replaced by Mark Sanchez in 2014. He got benched for Case Keenum.

Speaker 1 He came in for Alex Smith, then lost the job back to Alex Smith in 2016. He won a Super Bowl.
He went a season where he went 27 touchdowns and two interceptions in 13 games played.

Speaker 1 He's made $62 million.

Speaker 1 $120 if he goes throughout his whole contract that he signed with the Jaguars. And I think he just thinks.

Speaker 4 He's bad. He's like,

Speaker 4 when he puts on the Eagles jersey, he's like Tony Stark, R.I.P., my dog, getting into the Iron Man costume, right?

Speaker 4 When he's got that core, when he's wearing that uniform, for some reason, he's very, very good. And all other times, he's not good.
So I went back, I thought about it.

Speaker 4 I was like, was Nick Foles ever really good? And the best I can come up with is... Even when he was good, every time he threw the ball, it felt like he was just very, very lucky.

Speaker 1 That 27 touchdown, two interception year, which was phenomenal for him, the whole time we all were like, wait,

Speaker 1 this isn't actually going to happen. And they still were looking for someone else.
Like, he's not the franchise quarterback. After 27 touchdowns and two interceptions, I forgot to add.
So he stinks.

Speaker 1 He's had a ridiculous career where he's been benched or replaced or transferred for

Speaker 1 not good quarterbacks. He's got a statue of himself in Philly, and he has an enormous penis that is like stuff of legends, but he stinks at quarterback.
He has the weirdest career in NFL history.

Speaker 4 Right. He's like if Paul Bunyan was a really shitty lumberjack, but he cut down one great tree that damned the Mississippi River.

Speaker 4 And that's it. One giant, giant, enormous

Speaker 4 log of a tree.

Speaker 1 I looked at his stats. Nick Foles, if you took out that, so the 27 touchdown, two interception years crazy when you think about it.
Chip Kelly's offense for the Eagles.

Speaker 1 I think they lost to the Saints in the playoffs. So insane year.

Speaker 1 He had that blip where he's just crazy good. He had the blip where he wins a Super Bowl and he's crazy good and an insane run that no one could take away.

Speaker 1 If you took out his 27 touchdown two interception year,

Speaker 1 he's played 44 games. He's had 44 touchdowns and 32 interceptions.
He stinks. Yeah.

Speaker 1 So he's not good.

Speaker 4 So what's going to happen? So Jacksonville, it looks like they're thinking about moving on if they haven't already made that. They have to.
And Gardner, when he got in the game,

Speaker 4 Moxie looked really exciting when he was playing.

Speaker 1 And this is not me bashing Nick Foles, because if anything, Nick Foles is like

Speaker 1 kids should put, they shouldn't put Aaron Rodgers or Tom Brady or Drew Brees posters up on their wall.

Speaker 1 They should put Nick Foles because Nick Foles is an average guy who has had momentary situations where he has reached great heights. And that is like, that's the American dream.

Speaker 4 So, Nick Foles might have, he might have found a genie's lamp. It's true.
He might have used two of his wishes already on particular seasons.

Speaker 1 Probably going to win another Super Bowl at some point. He'll probably go back to Philadelphia.
Oh, and I forgot to say he almost retired before he won the Super Bowl.

Speaker 4 And he gives probably the least inspiring press conferences of all time.

Speaker 1 He is so confusing and at the same time, such a model citizen for anyone who is just an average. I mean, obviously, he's not an average show because he's an NFL quarterback, but in terms of like

Speaker 1 in context, he is completely average to below average at his profession, but he has reached moments where he has been exceptional.

Speaker 4 It's one of those things where you just got to ride with it if it's going well.

Speaker 4 And you saw this back when they were on the Super Bowl run in Philadelphia, they had the locker room, the shrine set up for him, where even his own teammates were like, I have no idea why this is working, but it's crazy.

Speaker 4 So let's just fucking lean into it.

Speaker 1 It's crazy. So, yeah, he's, I think he's got to be done.

Speaker 1 Which, if you're a Jags fan, I feel like you have to take that shot where you bring him in for all that money. Hopefully he has one of those genie wishes.

Speaker 1 But then knowing that it's failed, you can't be that upset because you got Gardner Minshew.

Speaker 1 Like if they didn't have Gardner Minshew, then you're sitting there as a Jags fan being like, are you serious? We did this. This is crazy.
But now I don't know what his contract is.

Speaker 1 I'm sure you can maybe trade him or I don't know. I'd take him.
I'd take him. For the Bears? Yeah, just for the Genie Lamp.

Speaker 4 Hank, would you take him for the Patriots?

Speaker 1 yeah genie lamp man like you got one left he is that guy where he's gonna pop up but and this might be the gambler speaking to me but i look at nick foles and i'm like he stinks but maybe but he's also nick foles he's nick foles

Speaker 1 right like i don't know he could do it um you think doug moron's in the hot seat yeah probably i i hope he's not but i think that he is i think so i think so uh because tom coughlin i think is is just waiting tom coughlin wouldn't what they said there's a bunch of infighting going on between him and coughlin already Yeah,

Speaker 1 I liked your idea, by the way, PFT, of the Giants-Packers game and them just showing shots of cold Tom Coughlin just for nostalgia.

Speaker 4 Just superimpose him. Like, just cut away to Tom Coughlin staring into the wind.

Speaker 1 Yeah, Tupac hologram him.

Speaker 4 Yeah, exactly. He should be in any snow game involving those two teams.

Speaker 1 All right, so the other side of this game, the Bucs.

Speaker 1 The Bucs are in trouble, PFT, because the Bucs.

Speaker 4 Well, they've got a decision to make.

Speaker 1 Well, and the Bucs are just good enough to do the old, we're building something here. And they have, at times, looked really good, and at times their defense is like awesome.

Speaker 1 Devin White was awesome today.

Speaker 1 Shaq Barrett, I think, is leading the league or tied for league in sacks. Like they have pieces that Mike Evans, Godwin,

Speaker 1 and Jameson Future Hall of Famer, they have enough pieces where you can sell yourself on a not-good Bucs team growing to be a good team next year.

Speaker 1 And the rest of their schedule, they have the Colts at home. They're at the Lions.

Speaker 1 They have the Texans at home and the Falcons at home. The Bucs are going to finish 8-8.

Speaker 4 I could see them winning all four of them.

Speaker 1 They're going to finish those games. They're going to finish 8-8.

Speaker 4 I could also see them losing all four of them.

Speaker 1 No, they're going to finish 8-8.

Speaker 1 I think they're, what, 5-7 right now? They're going to go 3-1 down the stretch. They will beat the Colts, the Lions, and the Falcons.
They're going to go 8-8, and you're going to walk away.

Speaker 1 They will be one of those teams next year, as long as they keep future Hall of Famer Jameis Winston, where people will say the Bucs might make some noise.

Speaker 4 And they have Vita Vea.

Speaker 1 And they have Vita Vea, who can do it all from

Speaker 4 being a blocking fullback to being a pass-catching fullback.

Speaker 1 Right. And Bruce.
And Bruce.

Speaker 4 They got Bruce and they're going to be around for another year.

Speaker 1 So, but do you know how, you know what I'm saying? Like, this is the dangerous spot that NFL teams get in where if they can finish a season

Speaker 1 well,

Speaker 1 they can sell themselves and their fan base.

Speaker 1 Shout out to Stephen Che. I think he's the only Bucs fan alive.
They can sell them on building something.

Speaker 4 Hulk Hogan.

Speaker 1 When it's all going to fall apart.

Speaker 4 You think that there are some people that just live in that pirate ship in the offseason? Yes. I I think there have to be, right? Otherwise, just a waste of decent real estate in Tampa.

Speaker 1 I think it's the Airbnb and Chris Berman gets it for at least one weekend in February. That would be sweet.

Speaker 4 Yeah. Lord Willing.
So, yeah, I think the Bucs, I don't know if they're going to finish 8-8. I think they'll probably end up maybe 7-9.

Speaker 1 You know what I mean?

Speaker 4 They're so frustrating. They're so frustrating because they can appear like the best offensive team in the league at times.
Yep. And they can appear as the worst offensive team.
And

Speaker 1 their run defense is actually, I think statistically, it might have changed in the last few weeks for a while there their run defense was the best in the league and their past defense was terrible we also invented a stat that we'll have to bring up in the future for the Bucs which is the Jameis Winston hat-trick where he throws for three touchdowns and also has three turnovers yes but he didn't have he didn't have a single turnover today did he uh I don't think so I think he had a clean game he might have had a fumble that's a pretty big improvement

Speaker 1 that's a pretty big hold on let me mark you guys

Speaker 4 you can't turn Jameis Winston over he had to have had a fumble there's no way he held the ball for the entire game I think he did It was in Jacksonville.

Speaker 1 Oh, it was in Jacksonville. Ooh.

Speaker 1 A little home away from home. Oh, did they did? Did the Bucs so the Bucs can claim

Speaker 1 stake as the best team in Florida? I don't know. I don't know.

Speaker 4 There's some Fitzmagic going on down in Miami.

Speaker 1 Yeah, and they don't play each other. So, damn, that's too bad because

Speaker 1 I'd like to see the Florida Super Bowl. Maybe that's something I'll be doing.

Speaker 4 Also, Felipe Franks isn't coming back to the University of Florida, so they might be better. Felipe Franks, fuck that guy.

Speaker 1 He's so bad.

Speaker 4 Do you see the anti-vaxxers?

Speaker 4 There was a big line of anti-vaxxers. Jenny McCarthy.

Speaker 4 Your people outside of the Jacksonville Stadium just holding up signs saying, don't vaccinate your kids, which is, that's a very dangerous place when people are walking into that pool and in the Jaguar Stadium to tell you not to be up to date on anything.

Speaker 1 Well, isn't that itself a vaccination? By swimming in that pool, there's so many diseases that you vaccinate yourself. You get a mouthful.

Speaker 4 You get a mouthful of denim water.

Speaker 1 If you just swallow that water, that's as good as a flu shot.

Speaker 4 Yeah, well, it definitely inoculates you against one or two hepatitises.

Speaker 1 Just stat check. Jameis Winston did, in fact, lose a fumble.
Thank God. All right, all right.
Thank God. Okay, so Doug Marone, not on a high ground.

Speaker 4 That's a good litmus test, though. Where you're unable to turn Jameis Winston over a single time.

Speaker 1 At least once. He has to turn it over.

Speaker 1 By the way, Nick Foles, back to him just one last time. He looks, I don't know what it is, but in the Jags uniform, and maybe it's the heat, he just looks slow.

Speaker 1 Like, and there was a few times where he got sacked where he just couldn't move. He just got sacked and he saw it coming from a mile away and just kind of fell into it.

Speaker 4 After the game, too, I'm telling you, I don't know if you've seen these press conferences that he's been giving after losses in the middle of a week when the press is asking him about his previous loss and some bad passes that he's thrown.

Speaker 4 He just seems like he's got low teams. He might have mono.
Yeah. Nick Foles might have mono.
He might have mano.

Speaker 4 I'm going to put that out there because I've never seen a quarterback that's more sleepy than he is.

Speaker 4 The most fascinating career I think we'll ever see.

Speaker 1 Like, in terms of just all over the place, I can't remember a guy who has this type of ceiling and floor, and just at the end of the day, you're like, he sucks, but.

Speaker 4 Well, it's like Jameis Winston in a single game.

Speaker 4 If you just stretched out one Jameis Winston game for like six or seven years, that's Nick Foles' career.

Speaker 1 That is Nick Foles' career. All right.
Last, or no, sorry, next game we have: Niners-Ravens, the best game, or what was said to be the best game of the 1 o'clocks.

Speaker 1 Ravens win 20 to 17.

Speaker 1 I have a question for you, PFT. It's the SeatGeek question.
Promo code take. You put in promo code take, you get $10 off SeatGeek purchase.

Speaker 1 How much do you think Justin Tucker is worth if you were trying to trade him or trade for him?

Speaker 4 What team? Am I the Bears?

Speaker 1 Any team?

Speaker 4 Six first-round picks if I'm the Bears.

Speaker 1 His value as a kicker is so off the charts. That game, like, it was a sloppy game.
Both quarterbacks, Lamar, it was clear

Speaker 1 the 49ers were like, we're going to stop the pass and the running backs and let Lamar kind of beat us with his feet, which he did.

Speaker 1 But with six minutes left, the Ravens got the ball and they didn't give it back. And they got into field goal range with like 230 left.
They're like, you know what? Justin Tucker's got this.

Speaker 1 No problem. He has now hit 38 straight fourth quarter field goals.
And he's worth, like, his value is that of a position player, in my mind.

Speaker 4 And he can sing opera, and he sings it in six different languages.

Speaker 1 He's insane, though.

Speaker 4 It is a very good luxury having a kicker like that.

Speaker 1 It's a game changer.

Speaker 4 I think he's actually worth a first-round pick. Yeah.
If you're a team that's on the cusp, you might not have a good kicker.

Speaker 1 They're always in field goal range. They always know that, like, this game is a perfect example where

Speaker 1 if you have any other kicker in the NFL, besides Justin Tucker, the end of the game looks completely different. But with Justin Tucker, they get the ball back.

Speaker 1 They get like with 234 left, I think they got on the 49er side of the field.

Speaker 1 They ran so conservative from that point on, being like, we're already kind of in field goal range, and he's definitely going to make it.

Speaker 4 And he, for some reason, he never seems like he's wound up on the sidelines. He never seems, like, after the game, when he makes a kick, he does seem very amped up, and he'll celebrate.

Speaker 1 He'll run around screwing himself.

Speaker 4 But before a kick, he's just, he kind of seems stoned.

Speaker 1 And they all go exactly the same spot. Right down the middle.
They go the exact same spot. I've never seen anything like it.
And they're incredible.

Speaker 4 And every single Justin Tucker kick would have been good from 15 yards farther out than where he actually kicked. It doesn't matter if it's a 40-yarder or if it's a 57-yarder.

Speaker 4 It's always 15 extra yards on the end of the day.

Speaker 1 And now that we said all this, I'm sure he'll miss a huge kick in the playoffs. But the Ravens, like,

Speaker 1 we talked about it last week, but they're a cheat code at this point because they did finally punt. But for a while there, they just weren't punting.

Speaker 1 And they had Justin Tucker to supplant, you know, supplement, sorry, Lamar Jackson and that running offense. That's insane.

Speaker 4 Did you hear the new stat that Florio is coming up with? No. The double triple.
Yeah, Lamar had another double triple today. He had 100 yards rushing and 100 yards passing.
The double triple.

Speaker 4 Even though it was like 105 and then 101 or something like that. That's a stupid stat.
The double triple.

Speaker 1 Well, Florio's. Okay, that's a cool stat.

Speaker 1 Yeah, you're getting a little stir crazy.

Speaker 1 So,

Speaker 1 the big thing, though, outside of Justin Tucker that I took away from this game, people were talking about how this was a Super Bowl preview.

Speaker 1 Earl Thomas, you know, got asked that question before the game or during the week. If this is a Super Bowl preview, I feel like both of their weaknesses came out more than their strengths.

Speaker 4 Well, yeah, this is how you beat the 49ers is you make Jimmy Garoppolo throw the ball.

Speaker 4 You make Jimmy Garoppolo throw from the pocket. You make him come from behind.

Speaker 4 And then you should be good because he telegraphs his passes a little bit. He's very easy to read as a defense.
So I think that's probably how you're going to beat him.

Speaker 1 It was such a classic, like, if Jimmy Garoppolo plays a little bit above average, they could probably win this game. And that's kind of what you need.

Speaker 1 Like the 49ers have everything else in place that if Jimmy Garoppolo can elevate his game 10%,

Speaker 1 they become almost unbeatable. And then on the other side, the Ravens run defense is what I've always kind of thrown out there is like, hey, if you want to pick one thing,

Speaker 1 they got gashed.

Speaker 1 Raheem,

Speaker 1 how do you say his last name?

Speaker 4 Mostert.

Speaker 1 Raheem Mostert. I fucking love Kyle Shanahan.

Speaker 1 Pick your poison. Just throw a bunch of guys out there.
He had 7.7 yards average per carry, 146 yards on 19 carries. Like,

Speaker 1 there are teams that can run on the Ravens. And if you're a Ravens fan,

Speaker 1 you're probably going to get mad at me, but you also probably know the truth here that their offense is lights out. Lamar Jackson is incredible.
Justin Tucker is incredible.

Speaker 1 Their defense at times can get run on.

Speaker 4 Also, we were talking about Justin Tucker and singing earlier. I don't know if you've noticed this, but Lamar Jackson has such a smooth, unusual voice.

Speaker 4 Yeah, I want to hear how he sounds when he tries to sing. Yeah, I think he could have like a nice sleepy brown type, gravelly sound to his voice.

Speaker 4 I was listening to it and trying to figure out what it was a mix between. Usually for me, it's always a mix between Pat Mahomes and Mike Greenberg.
Yep.

Speaker 1 Maybe a little Jerry Jones.

Speaker 4 But I actually think that it was a mix between Patrick Mahomes and Mike Greenberg. In this case, I actually think that it does play.

Speaker 4 But yeah, you're right. So the 49ers on offense, when they don't have Brita, they can just have Mostert run the ball.
It's crazy.

Speaker 4 You just put your foot in the ground and then you get downfield and the holes are always there. Right.
And Kittle is a really good blocking. Oh, yeah.

Speaker 4 He's probably like top three blocking tight ends and top three pass-catching tight ends. He's an absolute beast.

Speaker 1 Greg Kittle, Pro Bowl vote. Tweet it, hashtag Greg Kittle.
You have to say Greg underscore Kittle. Kittle, Pro Bowl, Pro Bowl Vote.

Speaker 1 But yeah, I mean, the Ravens deserve the credit for winning this game and doing it.

Speaker 1 It was ugly in the second half because it was raining and no one could pass it downfield and they seemed to just find a way it's it's funny because when as stupid as this sounds when a team goes on a roll like the ravens are on and they just kick the shit out of teams you almost feel like something's off because that just doesn't happen every week in the nfl so you want to see them win a game like today to be like okay they can do it both ways yeah it makes no sense like of course you'd just rather beat teams by four touchdowns every week but you watch the ravens beat teams by four touchdowns every week.

Speaker 1 Like, can they win a close game? Yeah, they can because they have a fucking unreal kicker and an unstoppable run game.

Speaker 4 I've got a formula to beat the Ravens.

Speaker 1 Are you ready for this? One, tackle Lamar Jackson.

Speaker 4 Play them in the exact same conditions that today's game was in. Yep.
Two, don't crash down on Ingram at all.

Speaker 4 And just let Mark Ingram run the ball for 150 yards in the first half and hope that he gets tired. Yeah.
And then just like

Speaker 4 your defensive ends out on Lamar Jackson when he's doing his little zone reads. Play the exact exact same defense you are in the back end, whatever that is.
I don't know.

Speaker 4 I'm not a scientist, but don't crash down on Ingram. Let him get tired, and then just hope to God that in the second half he doesn't gash you as bad as he did in the first.

Speaker 1 I have another way. Just scream at the TV for four straight hours.
Why aren't we QB spying them? Yep.

Speaker 1 Because that's the best when you can just pretend that you know how to run a defense against Lamar Jackson because you play Madden and do QB spy.

Speaker 4 Just have your slow-ass middle line play.

Speaker 1 Where the hell is our QB spy?

Speaker 4 Try to run laterally with Lamar Jackson he he actually is breaking ankles he breaks ankles full-on breaks them also want to give a shout out to RG3 in the postgame today

Speaker 4 he saw Kyle Shanahan he was like I'm gonna shake this guy's fucking hand yeah come hell or high water yes and he put him with him with a stiff arm the Heisman stiff arm and then just put his hand in Shanahan's hand and it was like that over-the-top handshake it was the it was the meme yes the new meme is now Kyle Shanahan and Robert Griffin shaking hands and they're both saying, fuck the Redskins.

Speaker 4 Yes.

Speaker 1 So if this was a preview for the Super Bowl, I'm down for it because it was awesome, and I'd like to see it be played in maybe not rainy conditions like this, but it wouldn't be in Miami, so maybe it will be rainy conditions.

Speaker 1 All right.

Speaker 1 We have three more games, the afternoon games. Chiefs Raiders, Andy Reid off a bye.
Andy Reid off a bye, Andy Reid off a bye.

Speaker 4 This is easy.

Speaker 1 It's the easiest thing in the world.

Speaker 4 I bet on this last Sunday, I think, last Sunday night, when we were talking about Andy Reid coming off a bye.

Speaker 1 Andy Reid off a bye.

Speaker 4 Andy Reid coming off a diners, drive-ins, and dives, too. That was nice, showing Guy Fieri some nice, nice, juicy bites of the Kansas City burgers.

Speaker 1 That is like the peak of American culture right there.

Speaker 1 You know, when they look back and they're like, oh, yeah, like Michelangelo and Monet, and I'm just saying names that I don't even know what the peak of

Speaker 1 culture they are.

Speaker 1 But that. Monet? Monet.
Monet. You know Monet.

Speaker 4 Dude, Lily Pads? Impressionists. Come on, Frank Caliendo.

Speaker 1 Get some culture. Fun fact, I went to the Monet Museum.
Line was too long, so I got an ice cream and left.

Speaker 4 You basically saw it all.

Speaker 1 If you're standing from far away, it actually looks better.

Speaker 4 So you got the true essence.

Speaker 1 I was a big time when I went to France just to see the line being really long. Like Notre Dame, when everyone was tweeting, like, oh my gosh, the Notre Dame Cathedral is burning.

Speaker 1 This is my picture with it. I didn't have one because the line was too long, so I just looked at it and left.

Speaker 4 Yeah, well, I did that kind of with the Mona Lisa.

Speaker 1 The Mona Lisa. We're cultured.

Speaker 4 We're cultured. Fuck the Mona Lisa.
I would rather watch a snow football game 10 times out of 10 than look at that stupid fucking 8x10 painting.

Speaker 1 Yeah, we got culture on this podcast. So anyway, that Andy Reed and Guy Fieri was the peak.
That was when you can note, like right on a map, that's when American culture peaked.

Speaker 1 Everything after that is going down.

Speaker 4 It'll be very sad. Yes, yes.
It's a watershed moment in the history textbook.

Speaker 1 It is. All right, so yeah, John Gruden.
We got like angry, cold John Gruden today. And did you see the reversal where

Speaker 1 he claimed it changed the game when he was already down 24-0? But he claims that the pass interference call that turned over an interception in the end zone that the Raiders had was a call made by

Speaker 1 Wizard of Oz or something.

Speaker 4 So the sky judge.

Speaker 1 He's mad at somebody. The man behind the curtain.
He's mad at someone. The exact quote is, we had an interception.
We thought we did intercept that. It was turned over by the Wizard of Oz or somebody.

Speaker 4 Okay. All right.
I'm trying to put that together. So has John Gruden seen The Wizard of Oz?

Speaker 1 Yeah, definitely got high. I linked it up with Dark Side of the Moon.

Speaker 4 You think so? Yeah. I think John Gruden.

Speaker 1 Jay probably got him to be high. Jay probably slipped him like a brownie.

Speaker 4 He probably thinks that Deuce is an oompa loompa.

Speaker 1 Yeah. He's flipped out.
He tried to put...

Speaker 1 Wait, no,

Speaker 1 that's Charlie in the Chocolate Factory. Oh, yeah, good call.
I was like, wait, did he try to put Deuce in the Chocolate River? Wait, that's a different.

Speaker 4 Yeah, also different. But that's okay.
So John Gruden has got his quarterback library where he's got all the VHS tapes because he's the last person on earth with a cassette player in his house.

Speaker 4 And they're all like game film of Baylor games from 1999 or whatever. We wanted to highlight one little like route option that was put into the system.
And then he's got Dark Side of the Moon on

Speaker 4 CD. And right next to it, he's got a cassette of The Wizard of Oz.
And that's the only movie that he's ever seen.

Speaker 1 And it's just a picture of Al Riveron's face slowly morphing.

Speaker 4 The son of a bitch.

Speaker 1 He's like, that motherfucker fucked us.

Speaker 4 I did notice that his face was frozen more often today than it was moving.

Speaker 1 He was not happy. Derek Carr, the relationship, it is awkward that those two have a house next to each other in Las Vegas because I feel like that's gonna

Speaker 1 it's it's tre it was trending up for a while there it looked great and the last few weeks has not looked so great Derek Carr has definitely come over and asked to borrow some inappropriate shit just no he's he's definitely come over to ask for something that you can blatantly see in his garage.

Speaker 1 So you realize he's just asking for conversation.

Speaker 1 He's like, hey, can I borrow, you know, like your

Speaker 1 shovel real quick? And he's got like six shovels on a rack in his garage. You're like, dude, he's like, well, I just wanted to see if you're going to watch the game later.

Speaker 4 I think he might be one of those guys that's like a roommate that you've had that's too comfortable borrowing like your personal effects. Hey, you got any nose spray? Yeah.
That I can also use in my

Speaker 1 nostril? Yeah, I wore your underwear by accident.

Speaker 4 Yeah, sorry.

Speaker 1 We have the same kind of meundies. Yeah, sorry.

Speaker 4 Our undies got mixed up in the laundry. And well, Derek, we got two different machines.
Yeah, it's weird.

Speaker 4 Wizard of Oz

Speaker 1 did it. My bad.
All right, so that game, the Raiders are done.

Speaker 1 They're done. Dunn chained them.

Speaker 1 The Broncos and the Chargers.

Speaker 1 I don't really know at this point what's happening, the fact that we make this joke, but it really is crazy that the Chargers play the exact same game every single Sunday afternoon. It is.
It's crazy.

Speaker 4 It's crazy. It's nice to know that some things in this life are constant.

Speaker 1 They got screwed by a P.I.

Speaker 4 Andy Reid after a bye-week. Yep.
Thanksgiving. You're always going to have one racist uncle that you have to tweet about to get content.

Speaker 4 And then Philip Rivers is going to be down by a score late in the fourth quarter.

Speaker 1 And you're going to be sitting there watching and be like, wait, didn't we do this last week and the week before and the week before?

Speaker 1 I thought this was going to be the week that Phil Rivers got benched. Because did you see that report that they might do it?

Speaker 4 And they kind of benched him. They stuck their toe in the benching Philip Riverswater because they put Tarad in at quarterback and they put Rivers out at wide receiver.

Speaker 4 But then they ran a play where Rivers got to throw a forward pass as a wide receiver. Yes, yes.

Speaker 4 They're like sending the slowest message possible to Philip Rivers. Like, eventually, if you keep fucking up, we might not, we might only have you run the ball as a quarterback.

Speaker 1 They did the like, what if we, have you ever thought about like an open relationship? Like, we'll still stay together.

Speaker 4 Just throw it out there.

Speaker 1 Yeah, just like you see people, we not date, but you know.

Speaker 4 Strictly physical.

Speaker 1 That kind of stuff.

Speaker 1 Yeah, so Brandon, or sorry, Drew Locke, maybe?

Speaker 4 Yeah, I like Drew Locke. You know why I like, he's lucky at all the right times.
Yeah. You have to be able to be really lucky at the perfect instances in the NFL.

Speaker 4 Like Nick Foles was really good at being lucky for a long, extended season. Yep.
Drew Locke looks like he's got the mojo.

Speaker 4 You remember at the Senior Bowl, he gave the scout the double finger guns when he answered the questions at the podium, so he's got some Moxie to him. Yep.

Speaker 4 I think that they probably should have overturned that first Cortland Sutton touchdown catch, but that was one of those instances where it was like, that was a cool enough play where it would be a criminal to turn it over.

Speaker 1 Got to let it go.

Speaker 1 Do the Broncos have

Speaker 1 the parent seats that they show during the game for the new quarterback?

Speaker 1 Because I'm pretty sure Drew Locke's parents were sitting in the exact same seats that Brandon Allen's parents were sitting in and doing the exact same thing where they would just show him after he made one good play and be like, this is it.

Speaker 1 This is the moment. Yeah.
So are those designated seats?

Speaker 4 I think so. It's like where Michael Phelps' mom used to always sit during the swim game.
Yeah. Yeah.
So that's, I think that they do have starting quarterback's mom's seats.

Speaker 1 Does Brandon Allen's parents, did they show up today and they're like, oh, this is awkward.

Speaker 4 Yeah, they were in the seats. And then Drew Locke's parents came down.
They was like, well, no, look at ours. Yeah,

Speaker 1 look at the starting quarterback.

Speaker 4 Yeah, your seats are actually

Speaker 4 directly behind John Elwey's ass. Yeah, you have to.
I'm just going to fart on you.

Speaker 1 You have to sit with Joe Flacco and his seven kids. Yeah.
So, sorry.

Speaker 1 All right, last up, before we do a little who's back and Thanksgiving recap,

Speaker 1 we have, what was the last game? Oh, Jared Goff's back.

Speaker 4 Big time. That's pretty much it.
And Blake Bortles got in, played well.

Speaker 1 Blake Bortles got in and played great. So, yeah, this was finally the Rams.
This was the... Oh, that's the Rams again.

Speaker 4 Are we going to say anything nice about Kyler Murray today? Because I feel like he's been very tough to judge.

Speaker 4 I turn on these Sunday shows, and then there's always somebody that's saying that Kyler Murray is a superstar or that he's going to be great.

Speaker 4 And then there are games like this where he doesn't play well.

Speaker 1 Well, what they need to do is they need to make a rule where if you have a new coach and new quarterback and you're not going to make the playoffs, you can end the season at any point that you want.

Speaker 1 So after Kyler Murray's last good game, they can be like, we're done. We're done with this season.
We're not going to play any more games. Let's end on a high note.

Speaker 1 Because this always seems to happen where, like, you'll have the rookie quarterback who has moments, and then as the season goes along and December hits, they're like, oh,

Speaker 1 sometimes he kind of sucks, and this is kind of a bummer sometimes. They just need to be able to end on a high note.
If you can just forfeit the rest of the season and say, we end on a high note,

Speaker 1 we're excited for next year, guys.

Speaker 4 Yeah, the only note I made here, and I guess the Cardinals have had their, they've had a couple games where they could have ended the season where Kyler Murray looked really, really good. Right.

Speaker 4 Today was not that day. They might get another one in the next couple.
I mean, what's their schedule?

Speaker 1 Were they off by?

Speaker 1 They were off of bye, which is pretty inexcusable for being that bad.

Speaker 4 Well, yeah, with the Arizona Cardinals, it's like I don't remember when they last played because they're kind of inconsequential just in general.

Speaker 1 But they had a Thursday game, but I don't know.

Speaker 1 I don't know, Jim.

Speaker 4 Their stadium looks like it'd be very comfortable to get tackled in. Yes.
Their grass looks extremely soft. It actually is because they wheel it in and out.

Speaker 4 If I had to pick one place to get ran over by Derrick Henry, one stadium, it would probably be in Scottsdale or whatever it is.

Speaker 1 Yeah, no, it's true. It's actually a great point.
It always looks a little moist and very lush.

Speaker 1 And yeah,

Speaker 1 that's a good way to end that game. Yep.
Yeah, there you go. All right, do you got a quick ad before we do Thanksgiving recap and then we can end with some who's back and college football recap?

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Speaker 1 Deshaun Watson said that he and AJ McCarron pulled the TD play from the Bears.

Speaker 4 Oh, okay. So, Matt Nagy, maybe some coach of the yearbooks.

Speaker 1 No big deal. No big deal.
But if you sat there and said, hey, could you imagine if Mitch Trubisky could do this play? Well, he did. He did it on a two-point conversion.
I was going to say,

Speaker 1 I thought the Cat stat was still alive, but it's not because the Bengals won.

Speaker 4 The Bengals won. But also, the team that they beat was on the field when the Black Cat came out.

Speaker 1 So there was a stat after the Black Cat ran on the field. The Cat teams were 0-12

Speaker 1 from that point on. They're now 1-14.

Speaker 4 Still not great. Still not great.
I think we had this exact same stat, but it was about Mercury being in retrograde.

Speaker 4 All the cat teams were losing, but we were too dumb to put it together the fact that it was also the black cats' appearance coinciding with Mercury going into retrograde.

Speaker 1 Also, while we're on just weird animal things, Swagger Jr., probably in AWL, because he got a little ahead of himself after we called his dad a loser and him a winner. He's a loser.

Speaker 1 Dad's a loser, but so is he. Yeah, well, he's not a loser.
You got to beat the Steelers. You've got to beat the Steelers if you you want to be a winner.
He's still winning. Nope.

Speaker 1 So is your junior loser?

Speaker 4 Two and one. You're only as good as your last game.
Yeah. So step it up, or it's off the glue factory, buddy.

Speaker 1 Quick Thanksgiving recap because

Speaker 1 that happened. Those games happened, but it happened forever ago.
I just wrote down three quick things. I'm all the way back in on Mitch,

Speaker 1 as you probably guessed.

Speaker 4 I did guess that. Let me say,

Speaker 4 it is great to watch.

Speaker 1 It was good.

Speaker 4 On Sunday, when you see the fantasy update at the bottom of the screen for the first half hour, it was like Mitch Trubisky.

Speaker 1 Number one.

Speaker 1 He was good. That last drive, he was good.
And people say it's the Lions. I don't give a fuck.

Speaker 1 I'm also, like Matt Nagy and Mitch Trubisky, I'm in the camp now. And this is very reactive of me, but just keep the same thing next year because I've convinced myself, whatever.

Speaker 1 They've shown a couple times where it's like, oh, maybe that was what last year was like was, that just do it again next year. And then if next year sucks, tear the whole fucking thing down.

Speaker 1 Future you, this is the ultimate future big cat problem that you're putting on right now.

Speaker 4 You're saying I'll deal with another 16 games

Speaker 4 of this duo that has made my life a living hell.

Speaker 1 If they lose to the Cowboys on Thursday, I will be singing a very different tune.

Speaker 4 Okay, so it's all based on how you're feeling right now.

Speaker 1 Very much in the moment, day-to-day, week-to-week feeling here where I'm back in,

Speaker 1 dare I say, portal game on Thursday?

Speaker 4 It is, yeah, you can say that. You're still on the hunt of the game.

Speaker 1 Maybe above 500.

Speaker 4 I can just picture you on Thursday morning. You're getting ready for Thanksgiving.
You're probably sipping a little champagne, watching the Bears beat the Lions, feeling like you're on Cloud 9.

Speaker 4 This is it. This is it.
This is the team. They're putting it all together.

Speaker 1 I also threw out a stat that I don't think anyone got what I was getting at, but I was like, teams that are above 500 this late in the season, like the majority of teams above 500 this late in the season go to the playoffs.

Speaker 1 That's a fact.

Speaker 4 Over 50%? Yeah.

Speaker 1 So there you go.

Speaker 4 Just ride with him, man.

Speaker 1 Hey, we're going to ride with it. The Cowboys, on the other hand, they stink.

Speaker 4 Was this a case of the Cowboys stinking or the Buffalo Bills being a juggernaut?

Speaker 1 No, the Bills are very good.

Speaker 4 I think the Bills, I think Josh Allen is creeping into that.

Speaker 4 I don't know. We haven't labeled our tiers yet.
I keep saying we have to label the quarterback tiers. Josh Allen could win you a Super Bowl.

Speaker 1 It is crazy that people don't talk about Josh Allen the way that we, like, Baker got the same thing that Sam Darnold has gotten at times. Josh Allen is good.
He is good.

Speaker 1 And the Bills, something's changed with their offense where they have just clicked in the last, I think they sent their offensive coordinator up to the booth, which is always a great football guy move.

Speaker 1 Got to see a bet, got to get a better angle.

Speaker 4 Yeah, when you send your guy up to the booth, he has to go with usually three things go alongside with him. One, a water bottle.

Speaker 4 Two, a mystery cup that's just filled with dip spit. And then three, like four pencils that he never picks up.

Speaker 1 Yeah, and like 16 Diet Coke.

Speaker 4 Yeah, yeah, Diet Coke. You're right.
Diet Coke.

Speaker 4 Water and then Mystery Cup that's just filled to the brim with school.

Speaker 1 Yeah, yeah. But yeah, Josh Allen, like, he's accurate.

Speaker 1 Their defense is rolling. Their offense is looking great.
The Bills, I'm so happy for Buffalo. Like, I have a couple friends from Buffalo, and they're like, this is the biggest win of my lifetime.

Speaker 1 It's like, it's Thanksgiving. Cowboys, they're 9-3.

Speaker 1 Awesome.

Speaker 7 It's like the highest-rated CBS game in a long, long, in years.

Speaker 1 The vibes are awesome. And you're going down, Gary.
That guy, confirmed, alive. There was rumors that he was dead.

Speaker 7 Confirmed that he was dead.

Speaker 1 Confirmed that he's alive. Right.

Speaker 7 Right. So he's back from the dead, literally.

Speaker 1 Literally back from the dead. I did an interview on NPR last week.

Speaker 7 He was dead sober during that rant, which is crazy.

Speaker 1 That's the type of thing.

Speaker 4 He's just a die-hard fan. That's the type of person that you get in Western New York.

Speaker 1 Love it.

Speaker 4 So he popped up on sodium and table.

Speaker 7 And he said he was doing it to save there was a little kid that was doing the interview. Yeah.
He was struggling, so he stepped in.

Speaker 4 He's the Mo Cheeks of Buffalo. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Beautiful. I like that.
Beautiful.

Speaker 1 As for the Cowboys, so I floated this theory before we started taping, but is there a chance that we are getting absolutely bamboozled by Kirk Cousins and his quote-unquote big wins this year?

Speaker 1 Because now his big wins were against the Eagles and primetime against the Cowboys. And I think both those teams might end up under 500.

Speaker 1 So then we just go back to the old Kirk Cousins stat where he never beats teams that end above 500.

Speaker 4 So what wins does he have this year over 500 teams?

Speaker 1 It's

Speaker 1 so the Bears are 500. I don't know if that's it's it's it's how they finish though.
That's right.

Speaker 4 That's what I'm saying. Like at the time they might have been good.
Right.

Speaker 1 So he it's just so funny how it's all like the NFL season is working out where these wins were like, this is the Kirk Cousins win that finally did it.

Speaker 1 And then you realize the Cowboys are complete cluster fuck and they suck and the Eagles suck.

Speaker 4 And what they still haven't beaten a team that's going to be over 500.

Speaker 1 They still haven't. And Kirk Cousins had his breakout year.

Speaker 4 All right, so they've got, but they've got Seattle. So they'll play one team.

Speaker 1 They're going to lose tomorrow night.

Speaker 4 They're going to play against Seattle. They'll get killed.
They're going to play Green Bay later on this season.

Speaker 1 That will be the test. But it's so funny how he did this.
It was genius. Just have the teams that you play be decent when you play them and have them suck the rest of the year.

Speaker 4 He's like a very shitty version of King Midas where everything that he touches, everything that he beats turns to exactly average.

Speaker 1 Yes, the Vikings are going to go to the playoffs this year, and

Speaker 1 we're going to look back and be like, wait, Kirk Cousins, do we feel good about him? And then realize they just didn't beat anyone. Yeah.

Speaker 4 All right, so I was right to put the dungeon on him.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I guess so. All right.
So apology, taken back.

Speaker 4 Taken back. Sorry, Kirk.
And then they'll just apologize again.

Speaker 1 The last thing is the Saints. clinched it, but we had the most electric moment in basically the season with the on-site kicks.

Speaker 4 Yeah, Young Weiku is an on-site kick specialist. Incredible.
He's a fucking wizard.

Speaker 1 Incredible. Incredible.
Three in a row.

Speaker 4 Three in a row, and none of them were particularly close either. No.

Speaker 1 He, I don't know how. Can you use a roster spot on just you'd have to do it like once a game because you couldn't just use it for the end of the games.

Speaker 1 But if he's that good, why not just have him on the team? Just do that?

Speaker 4 I think this week, Sean Payton's probably going to have Taysom Hill just like strapped to a chair like Clockwork Orange, staring at film, teaching himself how to do the on-side kick.

Speaker 1 That was such a Taysom Hill game. Yes.
I mean, he did everything. He blocked the punt, caught the pass, threw it.
Did he throw a touchdown?

Speaker 4 I think he threw a pass.

Speaker 1 I don't know if he threw a passdown or not. Ran for one.
Yeah. Ridiculous.

Speaker 1 All right. Let's do who's back of the week, and then we'll wrap up with some college football rivalry week.
Hank, you want to do, you start with your who's back of the week?

Speaker 7 Sure, I got a couple. My first one is Curb.

Speaker 1 Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Speaker 7 Curb's got your enthusiasm.

Speaker 1 No way.

Speaker 7 Tweeted out a teaser today. Larry Davids struggling with the toaster for two years.
Did some research is coming back in January.

Speaker 1 So

Speaker 7 that was a nice little, like, in the middle of a Sunday scaries after a long weekend. That was a nice little pick me up.

Speaker 1 Yep.

Speaker 7 And my other who's back is Christmas music.

Speaker 1 Yep.

Speaker 7 Okay.

Speaker 7 And just Christmas music debates because, like, apparently Britton voted that Mariah's Carey, All I Want for Christmas Is You, is the worst Christmas song.

Speaker 1 Oh, so guess what, Britton? You have the worst Christmas song that Paul McCartney fucking song.

Speaker 4 Which one is that? That's

Speaker 1 do they know it's Christmas? Ding Dong.

Speaker 1 Simply having a wonderful Christmas.

Speaker 1 That song sucks. So

Speaker 8 throwing it right back at you. You got one, PFT?

Speaker 7 Let's give us a hot take.

Speaker 4 My Who's Back or my favorite Christmas song of all?

Speaker 4 No.

Speaker 7 What's a popular Christmas song that sucks?

Speaker 4 Ooh, I mean, that is probably the worst right there.

Speaker 1 Simply having a wonderful Christmas time.

Speaker 4 I don't think it gets any worse than that across the board.

Speaker 1 And it just plays so much, and it's all in your head over and over. Simply having a wonderful Christmas time.

Speaker 4 I'm not a big silent night guy.

Speaker 1 Will Mrs. Lockwood be sending you an Advent calendar this year?

Speaker 7 Well, when I went home last weekend from my vacation, she sent me home with two Advent calendars.

Speaker 1 One for me? No. Oh, sick.

Speaker 1 Because I ate all of Hank's chocolates on day one. That's right.

Speaker 4 You just popped them all open.

Speaker 1 I mean,

Speaker 1 you can't do that to me.

Speaker 1 I know the chocolate's in there.

Speaker 4 He's like a dog.

Speaker 1 I see it. Like, come on, I want the chocolate.
He just gets rooting around.

Speaker 1 And it was one of those classic situations where if you eat like five days, you might as well just eat them all and just say someone came and ate all the chocolates.

Speaker 1 You can't leave 20 days, you know, with chocolates and five empty. So, where is that?

Speaker 7 It's at my house. Will you be bringing it in? Probably not.
Please do.

Speaker 1 I'll think about it. Please bring it in by no later than the third day.
I would like 22 chocolates. Okay.

Speaker 4 That sucks that it stops at Christmas, too, huh?

Speaker 1 What? Like the Advent calendar. We should have an Advent calendar.

Speaker 4 Actually, the whole year.

Speaker 1 An Advent calendar for the entire year.

Speaker 4 Instead of a word of the day, you just get a treat.

Speaker 1 One piece of chocolate every single day.

Speaker 7 We should get calendars that are just every other day, like when our shows are. So we get chocolates every time we do a show.

Speaker 4 Oh, that's good. Ooh, okay.

Speaker 1 I like that. We should get.

Speaker 4 Instead, we just get sugar-free Red Bulls and a $75,000 check.

Speaker 1 Yeah, that's true.

Speaker 4 We can buy a lot of chocolate.

Speaker 1 We should sell part of my take-advent calendars, but we just put like random things, like a half-eaten jolly rancher. Just things that we'll Wednesday and lined around here? Yeah.

Speaker 1 Lint from my belly button.

Speaker 4 So just trash. We just sell trash.

Speaker 1 No, but some days, like the first day back from the first football Monday is

Speaker 1 a big buffalo wing. Okay.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 Inside your ass who's got a couple of them.

Speaker 7 That was my third who's back. It's Cyber Monday.

Speaker 4 Oh, yeah. Cyber Monday tonight.
Check it out. Check it out.
Tonight, tonight. My first Who's Back of the Week is Coach K's health problems.

Speaker 1 Oh, yeah.

Speaker 4 Thoughts and prayers.

Speaker 4 I hope he's okay.

Speaker 1 I hope he's all right. No, no, but Hank, we want to.

Speaker 1 Come on. We want to send our best to Coach K

Speaker 4 on Wednesday or Tuesday night.

Speaker 1 You're making this podcast look bad by talking about it. No, it was Tuesday night.
That was so long ago. Yeah, that was.

Speaker 4 We need to raise awareness because maybe somebody out there in our listening audience is experiencing the same symptoms as Coach K. He's an older person.

Speaker 1 In which case, you should go to the doctor

Speaker 4 immediately. So they lost to Stephen F.

Speaker 1 Austin. Fucks.

Speaker 4 He's lost Stephen F. Austinitis.
Yep. And first time a number one team has lost to that low-ranked of a team.
Ken Pom, yeah. On Kin Pom in what, like 20 years? Forever.

Speaker 1 Forever. Ever.

Speaker 4 Since Kin Pom was born. Since he came out of his mom's business, they kept making a bet on Duke.

Speaker 1 So much much so, yeah, it was a bad bet. Hey, what do you want me to say? It was a bad fucking bet.

Speaker 1 So much so that he got Ken Pom disease.

Speaker 1 Literally an upset stomach.

Speaker 4 What did he say?

Speaker 1 He said he wasn't feeling right that day?

Speaker 4 Yeah, in retrospect, he was like, just so you guys know, I was sick that day.

Speaker 1 I love when stereotypes just like, hey, that stereotype and joke you've been making, it's actually true.

Speaker 1 Love it. Speaking of reinforcing stereotypes,

Speaker 1 Stephen F. Austin made Coach Case tummy hood.

Speaker 4 Speaking of reinforcing stereotypes, he's...

Speaker 1 70 plus.

Speaker 1 I just replied, come on for that.

Speaker 1 He can't be serious.

Speaker 4 Oh, he's very serious.

Speaker 1 He's very serious. He counted it as a loss.

Speaker 1 He was sick.

Speaker 4 As far as I'm concerned, it's not a loss.

Speaker 4 My other who's back in the week is Greg Ciano. Yep.
That's right. Coach Ciano, as first reported by Leroy the Dog, like a month ago, he is accepting the offer.

Speaker 1 Wait, but I thought he retracted.

Speaker 4 No, he never retracted.

Speaker 1 Oh, you retracted on behalf?

Speaker 4 No, I did not. I don't speak for my dog.

Speaker 1 But you said it wasn't going to happen.

Speaker 4 The Twitter account has not deleted the tweet. Okay.
He tweeted out. He was just like, he was earlier than Ari Abraham on any of his reports.
That kid is fucking back. I hate it.
I know.

Speaker 4 So Leroy tweeted out that Chiana was accepting the job. He did accept it after word got out that he was demanding use of a private jet to be named like the Air Shiana or whatever.

Speaker 4 Basically, that private jet is just as much of a biohazard as any Patriots fan crisscrossing the country. So he's back at Rutgers.

Speaker 4 He's going to return them to their glory years of going five and five. So shout out to Coach Ciano.
We knew that you had it in you.

Speaker 1 All right, my who's back is

Speaker 1 it's officially

Speaker 1 you can be socially acceptable to be drunk at all times season. That's it.
That's the who's back.

Speaker 1 You can just be drunk at this point in December. What? Tonight? Monday Night Football? Yeah, yes.
Even tonight? Yes. I can have a beer tonight?

Speaker 1 You can just be like a level of drunk slash full for the next 30 days. You're 25.

Speaker 4 You know what? You're just merry at this point.

Speaker 1 Yeah, you're jolly. If you guys are

Speaker 1 red cheeks, it looks like you just came in from the cold.

Speaker 4 It's the spirit of the holidays.

Speaker 1 Drink a little whiskey with your coffee in the morning. Talking to 2020 season.
Right.

Speaker 4 We're on to 2020. That's right.
You can't.

Speaker 1 Let yourself go.

Speaker 4 It's impossible to be inappropriately drunk off eggnog.

Speaker 1 Actually, a little life hack, if you are going to plan on getting in shape in 2020, eat a. Oh, they just showed.
Oh, my God.

Speaker 4 The Duke, Stephen F. Austin.
Did that just happen?

Speaker 1 Or was that last Tuesday? Oh, that's sports finals. That's the final of the week.

Speaker 1 You can see Coach K in the background.

Speaker 4 He's having some stomach cramps. Oh, man.
At the time, it was

Speaker 4 in his pain. Yeah, we should have spotted it then.

Speaker 1 Yeah, you get even fatter in December because then the pounds come off easier in January. So beat yourself up to a certain level.
Like, this is where you let yourself go.

Speaker 1 So then basically the first week of your diet, you will lose so much weight by just

Speaker 1 not eating horribly and being drunk all the time that you'll feel great.

Speaker 4 By just not being a shithead any longer. Now, the danger is that you just become a shithead over these next two weeks.
And so that's where you get yourself in the quicksand.

Speaker 1 Also, it's

Speaker 1 holiday party time who's back. And try not to embarrass yourself.
Yeah. Don't be afraid.
As karaoke, don't do any billy idol.

Speaker 4 Don't be the drunkest person there.

Speaker 8 Yeah.

Speaker 4 Be the second drunkest. That's probably the most.

Speaker 1 I'd say, depending on your, like, we should actually make a chart for the AWLs. I think you can't be the second drunkest if you're in a company of, like, 15.

Speaker 1 You need to, you need to be, you need to be in, like, the 10 to 20 percentile of drunkest.

Speaker 4 That's the specialist. But if everybody's in the 10 to 20th percentile of drunkest.

Speaker 1 So if you have 10 people in your office, you can be the second drunkest. Wait, no, you can't be the second.
Yeah, you can. Yes, you can.
Okay.

Speaker 1 If you were in a bigger office, if you're the second drunkest, then you might as well be the drunkest because everyone would be like, that guy was really drunk. Right.

Speaker 4 So if if it's smaller, then there's more degree of separation between you and the drunkest person, right?

Speaker 1 And everything's memorable, so it's like it's okay. He was the drunk, he was clearly the drunkest.

Speaker 1 But if you're in a party of a hundred, the drunkest guy might not get seen by everyone, so you might be seen as the drunkest.

Speaker 4 So, don't be the Steve Sarkeesian, be the Steve Spurrier.

Speaker 1 Yes, that's perfect. Write that down and put it on a card and read it right before you start your holiday party.
Yep. All right, let's.

Speaker 4 Also, Kyle Sloater's back.

Speaker 1 Kyle Sloater is back.

Speaker 1 I mean, I hate that when I saw that name, I was like, oh, PFT.

Speaker 4 Sloater City Madman.

Speaker 1 He made it happen.

Speaker 1 He's good. I'm telling you.

Speaker 4 Kyle Sloater is good. There was a lot of interest from the XFL if he wasn't going to get a starting job or at least a full-time job at the NFL.
Yeah.

Speaker 4 Sloater's back, and he's here to stay, baby.

Speaker 1 All right, let's do...

Speaker 1 So, Football Guy of the Week, we're going to put it on the blog again. So, go check it out.
We'll tweet it out. We have some good nominees this week.
We'll also do a vote on Twitter.

Speaker 1 I'm not going back to college to be your friend. I'm going so I can get Uber One for students.
It saves you on Uber and Uber Eats.

Speaker 1 I'm there for $0 delivery fee on cheeseburgers, up to 10% off smoothies, and 6% Uber credits back on rides. Just to be clear, I'm there for savings, not whatever you think college is for.

Speaker 9 Get Uber One for students, a membership to save on Uber and Uber Eats. With deals this good, everyone wants to be a student.
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Speaker 9 Eligibility and member terms apply.

Speaker 1 Okay, college football.

Speaker 1 What a weekend.

Speaker 1 Where should we start? Should we start with our guy, Harbaugh?

Speaker 4 Yeah, let's start with Harbaugh because I think you and I will probably differ on what to make of Jim Harbaugh.

Speaker 1 What do you mean?

Speaker 4 I say, who cares? Well, I say if you're a Michigan fan, keep Harbaugh around. He's going to be good.
He's always going to be good. If he doesn't beat Ohio State, who cares?

Speaker 1 No, I mean, I'm actually kind of agree just because the Michigan myth is one of the greatest myths going in all of college sports. They have won a half a national title in the last 60 years.
Right.

Speaker 1 And they make you think that they matter and that they're on the level of Alabama and USC and Ohio State and Clemson even now. Like that's that's what the Michigan myth is.

Speaker 1 So I think realistic Michigan fans probably are like, you know what? We aren't going to get better. It would be nice if he could beat the rival every now and then.

Speaker 1 But I was just sad to see him so sad.

Speaker 4 He's lost.

Speaker 1 Like he they lost in a very similar way that they did last year. And to lose like that two years in a row, it's fucking tough.

Speaker 1 And I think it's one of those weird things where if you talk about expectations of a fan base, Jim Harbaugh is an abject failure in that realm. Like, Michigan fans,

Speaker 1 as crazy as it is, they expect to win, be in the national title, even though everything in their history doesn't show that.

Speaker 1 Like, in terms of who they are now, they're probably exactly this, a 10-win team and not on Ohio State's level.

Speaker 1 And this is coming from a guy who roots for a team that's about to play Ohio State in Indianapolis and knows Wisconsin will never be on Ohio State's level. And that's just reality.

Speaker 4 I think there's one other person that we should put the blame on here, and that's Adam Schefter. Yeah.
Adam Schefter has been dealing with a kidney stone for the last several months.

Speaker 1 They've been on a stone. Several months?

Speaker 4 Well, I assume that a kidney stone just doesn't show up. And it's like, hey, what's up? I'm a kidney stone.
I'm just here now. I assume it has to develop.

Speaker 1 I might have one, so I don't know.

Speaker 4 Yeah, so he has spent, he's known that he's had to pass this kidney stone for an entire week, but it's been growing. And he said that

Speaker 4 he passed it 90 minutes before kickoff. Classic P-Boy just pissed something out right before the most important game of the season.

Speaker 4 As that kidney stone was growing, Michigan was good, and

Speaker 4 they were beating good teams.

Speaker 4 Schefter got rid of their good luck charm, that shard

Speaker 4 of calcified stone that was growing inside his bladder and cost him his team by shooting it out his urethra.

Speaker 1 I like that.

Speaker 7 Another pointless Adam Schefter news, he just tweeted this out as we were recording. And now, after that Sunday night loss in Houston, the Patriots won't land back in Foxborough until about 5:30 a.m.

Speaker 7 when it will be time to get to work on Sunday's game plan against the Kansas City Chiefs. Wow.

Speaker 7 As if the loss has anything to do with.

Speaker 1 Bill Belichick has never had to deal with playing Sunday night football on the road. Right.

Speaker 7 Also, like if they won, they would still land at 5:30 a.m. Correct.
And they would still be game planning against the Chiefs.

Speaker 4 Well, it it would be

Speaker 4 personally a bad flight for Adam Schefter because he would have to piss the entire time, and the bathrooms would be filled with people shitting their brains out with the flu. Yeah.

Speaker 4 That's what he thinks is. Yeah, he's like, they're not going to have to go five hours without urinating.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 Certainly. So

Speaker 1 the Michigan, back to Michigan. I mean, Harbaugh, I feel bad for him because he's lost.
And Ohio State is that good. I just think it's a weird.

Speaker 1 Whenever you deal with Michigan people, it's like weird because there's normal Michigan people who kind of get it.

Speaker 1 And then there are, I won't name names, but people in the media who are Michigan men who think that Michigan is on that level of like the cream of the crop college football programs, and they're not.

Speaker 4 What you should be worried about if you're a Michigan fan is not that you can't beat Ohio State because, as we've said, like they're a juggernaut and it's tough to compete against that.

Speaker 4 What you should be worried about is that your good coach is going to get so emotionally beaten down by losing to Ohio State that he's going to leave.

Speaker 1 Yeah, yeah. And yeah, I mean,

Speaker 1 I don't know what you do if Harbaugh was your golden guy. So what are you going to do now? And he's not.

Speaker 4 And Ohio State lost Urban Meyer and the train keeps going.

Speaker 1 Nine day. Like, it's crazy.
It's crazy. I mean, we were talking about Greg Shana, but somehow they've

Speaker 1 Irvin Meyer and Greg Shana walk out the door, and Greg Shano, a little bit different circumstance.

Speaker 4 Yeah, I would say so.

Speaker 1 But they got like significantly better on defense, and their offense looks better than ever. It's crazy.
It's crazy.

Speaker 1 All right.

Speaker 1 Sabin crying about unfair play. Holy shit, dude.
Yeah.

Speaker 4 Speaking of harbaughs, that's a John Harbaugh move right there. That is a John Harbaugh move.
You said it was unfair.

Speaker 1 This is also

Speaker 1 the Sabin thing. It's going to become a, is Alabama's dynasty over?

Speaker 1 Because they're like uncharacteristically,

Speaker 1 like, they're not Alabama Sabin-like team. They have, I was looking it up, they're 121 in penalties this year, yardage.

Speaker 1 They never have a good kicker, and and their defense was abysmal and they just lost i love auburn i love auburn because auburn is like that team that every few years just fucks shit up and but then you look at it the box score and you're like how did they do that they scored 48 points and bonix was like 15 for 30 yeah for like 140 yards yeah it was it was a great game to watch and uh the ending the misfield goal missed field goal was and for some reason alabama can't find a kicker they can pay anybody else to go to school there but kickers, maybe it's good kickers, they usually come from well-to-do families that can send them to expensive camps over the summertime.

Speaker 4 So it's not as easy to pay them off to come to your school. But for whatever reason, you can't kick for Nick Saban.

Speaker 1 I think it's the pressure. I think Nick Sabin puts so much pressure on kickers, they just can't do it.

Speaker 1 I see that. He's so crazy.

Speaker 4 I want to say there have got to be all sorts of crazy correlations that we can draw with the decline of Alabama football. And by decline, I mean, like, you know,

Speaker 4 they're still very, they're like, they were on the bubble to make make the playoffs until this game.

Speaker 1 This is the first time they won't, since the college football playoff was invented, that they won't be a part of it.

Speaker 4 Yeah, so by decline, I just mean Clemson winning occasionally, and now this.

Speaker 1 Right.

Speaker 4 What in our society increased at the exact same time that Alabama started to debate? Bitcoin. Bitcoin.
Exactly. Boom.

Speaker 4 Now everyone can pay their players more easily.

Speaker 4 What else has increased? TikTok. TikTok.
Billy, what's her name? Billy Haisley or whatever with the hair.

Speaker 1 Ellish.

Speaker 1 Billy Ellish. Everyone's going to recruit.

Speaker 4 Travis Scott.

Speaker 1 I actually think that,

Speaker 1 by the way, they're showing now, we're at the portion of the night. We haven't gotten all the way to American Ninja Warrior, but they're showing old school Shiano highlights.

Speaker 4 Just pointing up at God that he doesn't believe in.

Speaker 1 That he will.

Speaker 4 I mean, if you're Greg Shana, would you believe in God?

Speaker 1 He tells you he believes in God.

Speaker 4 You see God every day in the mirror when you're looking at yourself.

Speaker 1 He'll tell you when he's sitting in that living room that he goes to church every Sunday.

Speaker 1 I actually think that Dabbo has just stolen Nick Saban's powers because if you look at Dabo and the shit he's saying, he is Nick Saban now.

Speaker 1 He was flipping out of people on the sideline when they were just like kicking the shit out of South Carolina.

Speaker 1 He said that not a lot of or a lot of people predicted them to be competitive in the ACC, but not win it.

Speaker 4 They were there, Tom. ACC, we're talking about the ACCC.
ACC.

Speaker 1 Our good friend Tom Fernelli tweeted out that the over-under for wins for Clemson in Vegas this year was 11.5. Not a lot of people expected Clemson to do this.

Speaker 4 Where did that that half game go?

Speaker 1 Where did that go?

Speaker 1 He is saving, though, now. He's like finding any way to be like, yeah, the doubters and haters are out there.
No one has doubted or hated Clemson.

Speaker 4 Also, the ACC, I forget which division it is, but whatever one UVA is in. The Coastal, Coastal, they've had, what, seven different winners

Speaker 4 in the last seven years? Yep.

Speaker 1 Yep, they finally reached it. With Virginia winning on Saturday, they finally reached it.
Yes, Friday. The ACC has just been trash.
Incredible.

Speaker 4 And everyone expected Clemson to win.

Speaker 1 Yeah, and then lastly, LSU is awesome so LSU's great it's gonna be an awesome playoff I'm excited I'm very excited so LSU is gonna make it no matter what LSU Ohio State are definitely in Clemson's got to win and be in

Speaker 1 and

Speaker 1 I Georgia if they win they would be in if not it's gonna be Oklahoma I actually think Baylor if they won and Utah so one of those three could you imagine or if you want a two-lost Wisconsin team that beats Ohio State and oh yeah maybe they slipped up against Illinois but Illinois was kind of good and then they lost by like three touchdowns to Northwest.

Speaker 4 Or if you're a real conference, you'd have a 16-team playoff like FCS does.

Speaker 1 I've already conceded defeat, by the way, to Ohio State, so when you Buckeye fans start saying like 59-0 and like, you know, shitting on me on Saturday night, just know that what you're doing is wrong because I've already said you guys can win for the betterment of the Big Ten.

Speaker 1 I wouldn't want to embarrass Ohio State and make them be the four seed.

Speaker 4 Elevate the conference.

Speaker 1 I do not want to do that. I want the big

Speaker 1 conference over everything. No, I'm with you.

Speaker 4 I don't want to see Ohio State be the four seed because then I want to have a final that's a Joe Burrow revenge game.

Speaker 4 You know how rare it is in college football to get a revenge game with your quarterback against their old team?

Speaker 1 Well, now it's getting a lot more. We could have a double revenge game because Justin Field in Georgia.
That's true. Yeah.
So if Georgia gets in, there we go. All these portals.

Speaker 1 The portal making it all the way to the end of the year. All these kids are everywhere.

Speaker 4 Cam Newton probably had a chance for a couple revenge games, right? Yes. Florida, Blenn College.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Dell.

Speaker 1 Apple.

Speaker 4 Whatever other schools didn't pay him.

Speaker 1 Microsoft. A lot of them.
Yeah. All right.

Speaker 1 We're excited, though. College football playoff coming up.
We have some good guests. We have,

Speaker 1 should we say that we have one of the biggest interviews of our lives coming up this week? Just maybe give us

Speaker 4 good thoughts and prayers.

Speaker 1 Yeah, all I'm saying is

Speaker 4 be very supportive of us.

Speaker 1 Our lives, too.

Speaker 4 Over the next 24 hours. We can't tell you what it is.

Speaker 1 48 hours. Yeah, 44 hours.

Speaker 4 But just be supportive of us. Even if, like, I don't know, if you feel like talking shit to us or feel like

Speaker 4 trashing the Bears, just don't do it for the next couple of minutes. Why did you say that? I was giving you an example.
If you want to call Hank, why'd you go right to the

Speaker 4 Hank ugly and say that he was acting ugly on the show to me? Don't do that to me.

Speaker 1 Sean Watchen is literally running Mitch Chabiski's plays now. Yeah, that's true.
He's copying.

Speaker 4 So just be real nice to us. Yeah, we got a big week.

Speaker 1 We got a big week, and then on Friday, you get the Bears play on Thursday Night Football, Yippee. So you get that, whatever happens from that, too.
I love you.

Speaker 4 Big week coming up. Love you guys.
Love you guys.

Speaker 1 Boomerang.

Speaker 4 Well, it's 9 a.m. on a Sunday.

Speaker 6 The athletic director shuffles in.

Speaker 4 There's a loud man

Speaker 4 interviewing.

Speaker 4 Just wants to be head coach again.

Speaker 1 Bang, bang!

Speaker 4 Coach opened up a big binder that was filled to the brim with his plays.

Speaker 4 It had dives, whams, and sweeps, and blitzes and sneaks, and the one way you dive at their legs.

Speaker 1 Loss, lost, lost, lost, lost, lost, lost.

Speaker 1 Los, lost, win, win, loss.

Speaker 1 Los, lost, lost.

Speaker 4 His name is Gregory Scieno.

Speaker 4 And he's just what the balls need to break through.

Speaker 4 He's big and he's scruffy, and he drove over Kids Huffy when he coached at the OSU.

Speaker 4 Sing us a song of the Shadowman.

Speaker 1 Sing us a song tonight.

Speaker 1 Well you never were charged with a felony, but you could have been a bit more contrite.

Speaker 1 Oh lost, lost, lost, lost, lost, lost.

Speaker 1 Lost, lost, win, win, loss.

Speaker 1 Lost, lost, lost.

Speaker 4 Now Greg never won the Biggies Conference.

Speaker 4 He almost came close once or twice.

Speaker 4 But he cried like a baby and kept losing to Navy and then he blamed it all on Ray Rice.

Speaker 1 But he's paid his dues as a coordinator. He leads the Ohio State's team.

Speaker 1 His ego's humongous and he lives in Columbus and he thinks he can coach SEC.

Speaker 1 Sing us a song, young shadowman.

Speaker 1 Sing us a song tonight.

Speaker 1 Well, you never were charged with a felony. But we could have been a bit more contrite.