NFL Week 12 Recap, Fastest 2 Minutes And Football Guy Of The Week

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We're right in the middle of it. I love it.
I love it. All right, so we're going to recap all week 12.
We're excited. A pretty good Sunday.
Not great, but a pretty good, some good games. We have football guy of the week.
We have who's back and we have

fastest two minutes before we do all that though. Pardon my take is brought to you by the day.
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Today is Monday, November 25th, week 12. We start in Western New York where Josh Allen Iverson was palming the ball with his giant hands, crossing up the Broncos all afternoon long.
In a touching tribute to future Hall of Famer Frank Gore, the Bills were goring the Denver defense in the running

of the balls as Frank was teabagging the opponent, dragging his nuts into the third all-time NFL rushing list. As for the other side of the ball, it's clear Brandon Walker-Allen has shoved into the starting role too soon, pushing the Broncos further up the draft board for 2020.
Verbal meme, Teej. No one.

Absolutely no one.

Not a soul. And then the Buffalo

Bills, colon, circles the wagons. Bills 20, Broncos 3.
Whap! Whap! Whap! Whap! Let's kick it to my good friend Trey Wingo, who's in the house, which is filled with rich mahogany for the Bears-Giants game. It was Mitchapalooza by the lake on Sunday as the Bears were keeping it old school, featuring a subpar quarterback and an elite defense.
Pat Shermer is in a giant glass case of emotion as Giants fans aren't even mad. They're impressed how bad he's coached this team.
Daniel Jones told his teammates, Remain calm, we've got to keep our composure as he hooked up with Stay Golden Pony Boy Tate for a late score.

The Giants couldn't sniff out a win in four quarters because I hear that Bears can smell their periods. And you're not my boy, Blue, today.
Hey, Trey, are Daniel Jones and Eli Manning brothers? No. Yes.
Bears 19, Giants 14. In diarrhea town where the Steelers met the Bengals and Mike Tomlin told Mason Ramsey Rudolph,

if you ain't got no giddy, then giddy out my way as the big-faced quarterback was benched in the third quarter. In relief came Devlin Hodges, who threw Gordon Bombay to his receivers, making the Bengals' secondary look like it was smoking quack.
Tyler the Creator Boyd was a fucking walking paradox

with 100 yards receiving on the Bengals' otherwise anemic offense

that looks poised for an odd future.

Can the Steelers catch Tomlin's sanity down the stretch?

Steelers 16, Bengals 10.

Some spread.

Down to the big breezy,

where the Saints' offense looked highly caffeinated again,

led by a tall glass of Mountain Drew.

Michael Dave Thomas put up a Junior Bacon Double 50 burger in receiving yards,

and the grill was Jared cooking up the burgers all afternoon

as the tight end added 100 and a score himself.

The Panthers offense was no pussycats either,

as they got a late John Travolta from Christian Slater McCaffrey, who caught a couple broken arrows. The game came down to kickers, though, as Carolina's Joey, why don't you sigh, looked like he was a member of the poo-poo balls, as Will Triple Lutz nailed the landing to cap off the win.
Saints go marching, 34-31. In the metal lands where the Raiders tried to town the Jets, Derek Carr drove his car into a Brian pool.
No offense to my personal friend, Keith Moon, RIP. As Oakland left their offense in a black hole, Robbie Louie Anderson got fat off the Raiders secondary, eating a large plate of gangrene eggs in Sam.
Donald, that is. John Gruden tried to wash this loss down with a long neck bottle of Mike's Hard Glenonade.
As the Raiders were truly, thanks to truly for being a sponsor, that bad. Jets 34, Raiders 3.
Bucks 35. Falcons 22.
We weren't really in tune there, team. And Raujon, Maryland, where the Lions faced off against the Redskins amidst a massive sell-the-team protest in the stands.
And Dwayne Wade Haskins brought the heat, but it got his ass chewed out in the post-game locker room for taking

picks and not throwing them.

Bo Chicks Dig Scarborough has had

another big day, and Logan Paul Thomas

hung out in the suicide forest, also

known as the Redskins end zone.

All we are is dust in the wind,

Hopkins kicked the game winner,

and Jeffrey Dahmer Driscoll asked

can a ball out as he

murdered the last of the Lions' season's corpse. Redskins 16, the lions 13.
Every winter, between the months of October through March, thousands of dolphins are confined and brutally killed in small towns across Japan. Sounding rods beneath the water's surface interfere with the Dolphin sonar.
Once disoriented and enclosed within the nets, the Dolphins panic. Mothers and babies call out in distress as they are separated, hoisted up and dragged off, soon to be mercilessly hacked to death.
Dolphins 24, Browns 41. In Philadelphia, where Carson

all I do is wince, wince, wince,

was in a lot of T-Pain

as the Eagles offensive line didn't

hold up for their franchise quarterback.

Franchise quarterback, boom.

Rashad Penny Hardaway

caught Pete Carroll's eye

as they bonded over their love of giving

improper benefits. It's not

so Doug Funny Peterson

in Philadelphia right now as the

Thank you. Hardaway caught Pete Carroll's eye as they bonded over their love of giving improper benefits.
It's not so Doug Funny Peterson in Philadelphia right now as the Eagles have the beats. Seahawks 17, Eagles 9.
Hey, good guy! Out! Hey! We finished in the Great White North, the Grey Cup, as the Hamilton Tiger Cats had a friendly meetup with the Winnipeg Blue Bombers. Three different quarterbacks led the Blue Bombers to 222 yards passing.
That's what I call a duh-duh-duh, giving the Blue Bombers an extra pop on the way to a victory. It feels like 1990 in the peg, as Mike O'Shea Can-You-See out-doled Hamilton head coach Orlando Canada Steinhauer, leading the Double Bs to their first great cup championship in three decades.
Blue Bombers 33, Tiger Cats 12, or in Canada, 33 rouges to 12 rouges. All right.
Week 12 in the books. We have Monday night, actually.
Yeah, we do. Big game Monday night.
I always say that, though. You know, it feels good.
That's just bonus football. Yeah, we watch football all day, and it feels like we accomplished something by the end of the week.
So week 12. I was going to say the worst part about the season ending isn't the fact that we don't have next Sunday to look forward to.
It's that when the Monday night games stop. Yes.
That's a tough pill to swallow. Yes, and it always coincides with the bowl games stopping, too.
What do I do on Monday nights now? Yeah, you got nothing to look for. Big Monday.
That's true. Yeah, Big Monday is there.
Always got Big Monday. And then the championship game in college football is on the 13th.
You always got Big Monday. Okay, so you can watch us, by the way, BarstoolGold.com slash PMT.
We are live right now. Let's start, as we always do, with the Sunday night game, and then we will work backwards.
I'm not going to say the F word, but I did say this on Friday that I'm going to continue to consider the Packers semi-F words because their defense is not for real, and their offense does this thing where you now have two cases of it, the Chargers game and this game. So it's basically just West coast where they looked atrocious they looked so bad right aaron rogers sucks on the west coast i was running the numbers on him i think he's something like one in five in the last 10 years well west coast here's here in california he's a cali boy he goes home he gets too comfortable here's the problem pft uh it looks like the 49ers are the best team in the NFC,

which I think everyone's been kind of flirting with for the whole season.

But it really has kind of cemented the last few weeks.

And then if you want to say maybe there's a team that could be challenging them for that, oh, it's the Seahawks.

Guess what?

Both those teams play on the West Coast.

So the Packers want to go to the Super Bowl.

You've got to go to the West Coast. It looks like that.
we can't help but flirt with the 49ers when jimmy's playing he did that smile the defense you know what cal shannon figured out that it seems pretty easy to to put your quarterback in a position to win is just run a lot of bootlegs run a shit a lot like just every single play do a fake handoff to play action into a bootleg and then you just have a brand new pocket and you're out in the middle of nowhere you can make a clean throw he's he's like the only coach that has figured out like it's not necessarily i don't want to use the word rinky dink but i think a lot of coaches think it's rinky dink to do too many bootlegs like make my guy stay in the pocket you don't have to it's a shanahan it's the shan way. Jake Plum always looked good on the bootleg.
You see Mike Shanahan up in the booth today? Tan as could ever be. So red like a lizard.
It's November, dude. The chameleon.
Yeah. His skin just adapts to whatever color shirt he's wearing at the time.
There's not enough sun to be that color right now. But, yeah, the 49ers are very, very much real.
Again, this is not like some new

thing that we've stumbled upon.

It's just when you watch them time and time again,

now they're playing a lot more games

on primetime. Their defense

is fucking ferocious.

They feel like they have all the guys who

can run like

four 440s and also

are 280 pounds and can

shed every single offensive lineman. I think that DeForest Buckner might be the scariest defensive lineman.
I mean, they have a Bosa. It was unbelievable.
Still do the shrugs. So their defense is incredible, and then oh yeah, looks like when you get your Pro Bowl tight end, maybe the best tight end in the league, Greg Kittle back, your offense looks a little bit more competent than it did with his absence.
Do you see the news about him that he was playing with a broken bone in his ankle? I'm sure he was. He's a fucking tough-ass dude.
Which, actually, that's not as bad as a sprain, though, right? A broken ankle. True.
You'd almost rather break it. You just get surgery.
So, yes. Because of the Alabama ankle.
But he's out there and he's catching passes with no one around him. And I don't know how they get this wide open in the middle of the field all the time, but they constantly do.
Yep. The 49ers look really, really good.
Are you worried about, as a Packer owner and an apologist, and a disgusting, I don't even like, fake fan of theirs? I'm not a fake fan. Are you worried that Matt LaFleur has looked like he's had his pants down a couple times this year? I was more concerned when they showed Matt LaFleur and Aaron Rodgers on the sideline in third quarter.
They were both standing by themselves. Yep.
And they were both, like, next to each other in a way, but just not looking over at the other guy. Trouble in paradise.
Packer fans are going to get triggered because guess what? It's a rare day where the Bears won and the Packers lost, but all I'm saying is the Packers will go to the playoffs, but do you feel confident if you're a Packer fan and you're looking in the mirror, you wake up on Monday morning, you look in the mirror, do you feel confident with your team in the playoff football? Probably not. No.
Probably not. The secondary doesn't look very good at all.
Sorry. You know what needs to happen? Just Aaron Rodgers needs to invent a catchphrase.
This is the time of year that he does it. And Aaron Rodgers still has that ability where i wouldn't be shocked if he puts the you know the team on on his back and wins a game in the playoffs where they probably have no business winning but i'm just the the defense that everyone talked about at the beginning of the season uh turns out they were just playing mitch brisky yeah you just want to say the word fraud you're just looking for i didn't say it though but they you you throw fraud around that's fine like you're tossing mardi gras i'm right about this one.
I don't know. I though, but they have their frauds.
You throw fraud around. That's fine.
Like you're tossing Mardi Gras beats people.

I'm right about this one.

I don't know.

I am very right about this one.

I wouldn't use the F word just yet.

A lot can happen in between.

They're going to get some guys healthy.

I actually have no idea if that's true, but you can always say we're going to get our

guys healthy.

I feel like that always works the other way for the Packers.

Like, Balaga went out today.

Yeah, that was actually tough.

Right.

That was a tough loss.

The Packers do have...

I'll say something nice about the Packers.

It does seem like they have really bad injury luck every single year every year every year it really does uh okay so let's go backwards in time we'll start with the one o'clock we'll start with the tampa bay bucks and the atlanta falcons the bucks win 35 22 i love jamis winston it has gone from a lust it went from this guy's a joke to a lust to i got jamis one of one in my life realized there's a derangement syndrome by major media members you've been red-pilled i've been red-pilled jamis winston is one of one of if not my favorite quarterback in the nfl because of the comedy and because you can just always, like, do you know he leads the league this year in 300-yard games? I did not know that. He has eight of them.
He has eight of them. He has six multiple touchdown games, interception games.
He's got to be close to being the best pass in the league right now, yards-wise, right? He started this game in Jameis Winston fashion. He went interception, touchdown, interception, punt, touchdown, touchdown.
He had three touchdowns and two interceptions just in the first half. I think I figured out what his problem is.
So he's not going to get his eyes fixed. He's not going to get laser surgery.
He's not going to wear glasses or rec specs, even though that would be amazing if he went out there with some Coke bottle, horn-rimmed-type glasses. It would work for him.
It would be perfect. He's not going to do any of that.
He just needs bigger targets that make it easier for him to see them. So he threw a touchdown pass to Vita Vea, who is the heaviest player in NFL history to ever catch a touchdown pass.
347 pounds. Also, he's named after a Coldplay song, which I guess is pretty cool.
So I guess he's a pound heavier than Jonathan Ogden was He's 7 pounds heavier Listed 340 was Jonathan Ogden And 8 pounds heavier than Kelvin Benjamin So he just needs bigger He can throw the ball to Mike Evans We know that, he's a big dude Godwin's unbelievable Godwin is really really good Godwin's Law because he loves Arians. And I think he just needs to find a set of wide receivers that can kind of size up.
The girthier the player, the easier it is for Jameis to identify them running through space. I'm being honest right now.
He's going to be 26 in January. You really wouldn't? I know we laugh, and and he does make a bunch of mistakes and he is the first or sorry the second quarterback in the last 20 years to have 20 interceptions in 11 games the other one to do it this probably speaks to why i'm in love with jamis winston with jay cutler in 2009 um but there i feel like there's something you could build something with Jameis Winston.
He's young enough. He shows enough.
The Marcus Mariota-Jameis Winston thing has been decided for a while now, but Jameis at least – Wait, it has? Yeah. I mean, Marcus Mariota was benched for Ryan Tannehill.
Yeah, but we're sure that Jameis is much, much better. Yes.
Marcus Mariota was benched for Ryan Tannehill. Okay.
Marcus Mariota also made the playoffs. Okay.
Marcus Mariota was benched for Ryan Tannehill. I'm aware.
I don't know how many times I have to say that. It's the six-year bump for Tannehill.
You had to roll the dice on that. Marcus Mariota, no.
Definitely not. But Jameis, there's enough.
You basically, maybe I'll put it this way, all right? He may never be a great quarterback, but he will be a quarterback for a long time because everyone will look at him and be like, I can just get, if I can get him to not throw three picks a game, that's a pro bowler. Yeah.
The only thing with, with him is I don't see Jameis Winston ever being a backup quarterback. He's not a good backup.
No, he's, he's the guy that you put out there and you roll the dice and you say, fuck it. Let Jameis go be Jameis out there and go 100 miles an hour into a brick wall.

But you don't actually, I can't imagine him being an effective backup.

You know what I'm saying, though, because every coach, every NFL coach treats themselves like they are a cowboy ready to, you know, wrestle down a wild horse and be like, I'm

the guy who's going to make this horse a Kentucky Derby winner.

What's the bad boy?

It's the bad boy effect.

It's like, I can change him. I'm the one who can get him to stop throwing three picks a game.
And he has, Jameis Winston does enough of the other stuff where you can say, if I can just limit the turnovers, he can be a guy. The other big news about this game was Dan Quinn might not have completely found the locker room.
No, he's back. He might still be a little bit lost.
No, he's back. He's all the way back.
Dan Quinn is? Yeah. Even after today? Oh, yeah.
Oh, yeah. He's back to doing Dan Quinn stuff because he kicked a field goal with eight minutes left in the game to make it a two-score game from a two-score game.
From a two-score game. They were down 28-13, and it was fourth down with eight minutes left in the game, and he kicked a field goal to make it 28-16.
But that's what Dan Quinn knows. Whenever he gets confused with numbers, he just goes back to the old theory of, I would rather have more points than fewer points.
I actually think that Dan Quinn at this point, he has the columns that say what you should do and what you shouldn't do. He just accidentally reversed it when he made it in Excel think yeah so he's following the rules but he's so consistently awful at these in-game situations that that's the only explanation that he actually has it written down and he's just been reading the wrong sheet the whole time well let's say i just got this new computer right now and the scrolling on it is reverse what i'm used to so i'm still getting used to like scrolling down when i need to scroll up i don't need i don't know how to fix this but that's what dan quinn's brain is yes when he's looking at an excel table he just scrolls up from the bottom right he's like if it's lower on the list that actually means it's lower probability so i'm going to go ahead and just kick it by the way he also punted with five minutes six minutes in the game.
You can't take him with you. You can't take those punts with you.
He punted with six minutes left in the game. I know he was on his own 15, but he punted with six minutes left in the game.
But who's the coordinator there? I don't know. I'm going to assume it's Sarkeesian still.
It was a nice try. Nice try to save your job, Dan Quinn.
You get Thursday Night Football. You get the game that everyone is half asleep and very drunk on Thanksgiving Day to have the Saints come in and just kick the shit out of you with revenge.
But, yeah, it was a good try. You did.
You rallied the troops for two weeks, and then you went right back to being Dan Quinn and doing stupid things like kicking a field goal when you're down 15 to go down 12 in the fourth quarter. So if you're Arthur Blank and you're looking at your next coach are you going to do the thing where you try to go real young and try to get an offensive mind in there or do you just stick with what you've done for the last 20 years and just have a defensive guy come in there because if so this could be the Greg Sh landing spot.
That's probably why he walked away from Rutgers. Yeah, he's definitely getting a head coaching job in the NFL.
Shiano looks like he knows the NFC South. He knows the NFC South really well.
He's a guy that has coached, I think, his entire career in uniforms that are red and black and some sort of gray, if I'm recalling correct. Yeah, yeah.
He's a red, black, and gray guy through and through. He's on the Patriots staff.
For a month. Okay, well, that counts.
Yeah, did he get team-issued uniforms? I feel like Belichick doesn't give those to you until you get into a game. Burnt orange for a day.
For the throwbacks, the creams. Until the lice head guy sent everyone after him.
That's true. We won't comment on who that is.
I think that, I don't know, I do like how Greg Sciano issued a Trent Dilfer type contract demand upon Rutgers. Yeah.
And wanted the world in exchange for them to allow himself to grace Rutgers campus with his presence. If you throw in blue too, you have everything.
Because I think he was was at Penn State I know he was at the Bears for like a year or two and I think he was yeah I think it was Penn State because you know yeah all right well yeah okay all right so anyway um Greg Shiano is not going to get this job but it was a nice try uh we we talked about it people are talking about it uh but yeah this game Jameis I think they're going do a bridge year with jamis and i think they're gonna i think they're going to keep jamis and try to corral him bruce arians is just the type of guy he mean he openly said he's getting fucked up tonight uh-huh so why not just get fucked up and and probably call jamis and be like hey man i just want to say i love you yeah like what you did today was awesome bruce arians games. One, he's getting fucked up because he's pumped.
Two, he's getting fucked up because he's pissed off. Well, and he loves to go deep.
He loves to take shots. Yeah, Jameis is a fun quarterback.
He's a very fun quarterback. If you're coaching him.
He's at least going to throw the ball around. Bruce Arians spent so much time in Arizona with Ryan Lindley and Stanton.
Yeah. Various iterations of Drew Stanton that would come in for Carson Palmer whenever he'd get his elbow injured again.
Yep. And so he is sick of that type of quarterback that can't even throw the ball.
Now he's got one that can throw it. So he might as well just take it out on the highway, see how fast it goes.
Also shout out, speaking of quarterback, shout out Matt Schaub for getting us the over. Yeah.
That was cool. Yeah.
I feel like Schaub's gotten in a lot this year. He's just in there doing things.
I love it. I love it.
We need that. We need more of that.
All right. Broncos-Bills.
Bills are now 8-3. Yep.
We looked at their schedule coming up. It is very difficult.
They have at Cowboys on Thanksgiving. They have first the Ravens, at the Steelers, at the Patriots.
So it's going to be tough, but they're eight and three. We should say again, they're eight and three and they absolutely shit can the the Broncos and didn't let them do anything on offense.
The Broncos did not get into the red zone once. That's tough.
That is ridiculous. And, you know, John always looking at Josh Allen being like, God damn, look at that boy.
He's so tall. That is exactly.
He's so good. He's looking at Josh Allen like your neighbor looks at your new truck when you pull it in the driveway.
It's like, damn, that thing got a Hemi? I wish I could get one of those. Brandon Allen, by the way, had a Josh Rosen stat line.
I saw that. 10 for 25, 82 yards and interception.
How you throw the ball 25 times and only get 82 yards, I do not know. It's tough.
They need to get Drew Locke out there, show off some of his quality and completions. They need to get him out there.
And then the other big story from this game is Frank Gore, third all-time rushing. So he's now just behind Emmitt Smith and Walter Payton.
He passed Barry Sanders. So I have some Frank Gore stuff for you.
Well, first of all, anytime someone jumps on or goes up on the rushing board, it just is more of a reminder how ridiculous Barry Sanders was. Yes.
Because he only played 10 seasons. And I looked it up, and Barry Sanders averaged five yards a carry.
That's insane. Average.
That's insane. What year is this for Gore right now? This is year 15.
So he had 500 more carries than Barry Sanders, and he just passed him. Emmitt Smith had 1,400 more carries than Barry Sanders.
So Barry Sanders, again, I don't want to steal from Frank Gore's moment, but if you didn't see Barry Sanders play, go just YouTube it because he was that ridiculous. All-time shoulder pads guy, too.
All-time shoulder pads. He had the boxiest shoulder pads.
Yeah, this is Barry Sanders' record. I always think of him as being the all-time leading rusher, even though he's not.
Right. It's one of those things when— He could have had it if he wanted.
He just didn't want it. And Emmitt Smith has it, and it's like, okay.
Yeah, you know what? Emmitt Smith did it for a really long time. Good job.
Yeah, you know what? But if you're saying who you want, Walter Payton or Barry Sanders is the answer. Everybody ahead of Barry Sanders on the list should have an asterisk next to their name.
And then underneath where it identifies what that means, it just says, did not play for the Lions. Yeah, or asterisk, remember, Barry Sanders just quit all of a sudden.
Yeah, not playing for the Lions is basically a performance-enhancing drug. All right, so here is the Frank Gore stat, though, that is incredible that he needs all the credit in the world for.
So this is his 15th season. He has led every single team he's been on in rushing in that season.
That is insane. Insane.
Is it happening again this year? It is happening again this year. He is about 100 yards ahead of Singletary, I believe, right now.
And then here's the other part. In his career, there have been 240 regular season games.
He played in 220 of them. So he's basically just never been injured.
Never gets hurt. I think it was 13 of the 14 seasons, he played in 14 or more games.
I think Frank Gore is really good at falling down. There's an art to getting tackled.
I think we were talking with Arian Foster about that like a year and a half ago. There's an art to being tackled and not getting injured on your way down, which Arian Foster probably not the best example of that, but Gore is a perfect example of it.
Maybe he doesn't move fast enough to ever hit the ground violently. Right, and this isn't like one of those things where he's in his 15th season and it's a pity party.
He's still producing. I mean, he's not their feature back, really, even though he's leading the team in rushing right now, but he still is going out there and getting positive yards and doing well.
He kills the clock. What is his average yards per carry, if you had to guess over the course of the career? Oh, I have it.
It might be like 3.9. No, it's 4.3, so it's impressive.
Yeah, better than I thought it would be. Better than Emmitt Smith.
yeah he just he melts the clock he's like a salvador dolly painting in the back field you can just it's like hit playing madden and then uh going to the main menu and selecting the accelerated clock whenever you put frank right to play like you ever do you ever say like fuck it let's just play two minute quarters or three minute quarters i don't know what the minimum is yeah you basically just it's just one possession one possession Is it, is it time right now to start asking about Sean McDermott, possible coach of the year? That's like the sweet spot for a coach of the year, coaching a smaller market team and elevating them beyond what their expectations were. Yeah.
Cause they're not going to give it to Belichick. We know that.
So my list. If they can't give it to a Falcons coach, they have to give it to like an also ran from an AFC North or an AFC East.
Yeah, so if Brian Flores had gotten to four or five wins, I would have given him my Coach of the Year vote, which I don't have. I still think it's going to probably be Kyle Shanahan just picking like, oh, best team, hasn't won it yet.
But I also would give it to Mike Tomlin. He's done a pretty good job.
He's done a very good job. We'll get to the Steelers, but if the playoffs started today, the Pittsburgh Steelers would be their sixth seed.
I think McDermott doesn't get enough shine because he doesn't have a thing. He doesn't have a thing that makes him stand out.
But I'm talking visually. Visually, the best you can say about him is he looks like Ron Howard.
If Ron Howard's dad, instead of being a director, was a strength coach. Like a beefier version of Ron Howard.
Okay, that counts. Yeah.
Yeah, I like that. So, by the way, I know we're going to do Who's Back later, but a big time Who's Back related to the Bills is the crazy Bills fans screaming about how they're going to beat the Cowboys in the early 90s when they just got killed by them, and everyone in Buffalo cries about that still.
Not trying to... Don't bring that up.
I mean, I really feel bad about that. But that guy is awesome.
My fan of the week this week was the Bills fan with the giant belly that had Ard Allen is better than your Allen paint across it. Yes.
You could probably fit a medium-sized Peter King column onto his stomach. It's that much surface area.
And I like that he does the full face paint, too, where it's like, I don't really understand that. The stomach should be enough, but then he's like, you know what, let me add a little something here.
It won't surprise you to know that he was also wearing shorts. Yes, he was.
Of course he was. That's an ultimate shorts guy.
By the way, shout out to our guy. What's his name? Chris Matthew? Chris Matthew.
No longer has to wear shorts. That's cool.
Did you see him after the Blue Bombers won the Grey Cup? He put on, they brought him onto the field and he put on pants for the first time in 19 years. They did? It was glorious.
Yeah. So he put on the pants.
They were camo pants. They were like Ravens style white and black camo pants.
And he put them on over a real stylish pair of Nike Air Monarchs. Ooh.
That's the new Canadian tuxedo. It's no longer the denim on denim.
It's just snow camo on top of dad shoes. All right, so I have the Bills fan.
This is a famous Bills fan because the Bills are playing the Cowboys on Thanksgiving Day. So we're going to get all the memories.
This guy. And that's when we met up with this enthusiastic fella.
Well, you hear what this guy says, pal. Goes for the Dallas Cowboys and we're the Bills.
And I can't wait to rub this in his face. He's been telling us this for over 10 years about Dallas.
No, it's the Bills. Buffalo all the way this time.
Three times. The third time is the charm.
Dallas is going down, Gary. I mean, Buffalo is going to win it.
Dallas is going down. I love it.
The third time's a charm. And then they went on to, if you don't know history, they went on to lose that time and then another time.
They could actually kill Jason Garrett. I think that if the Bills beat the cowboys on thanksgiving yeah that is going to be a high profile enough loss well we'll get to that yeah he definitely but that guy is going to be back uh i might tweet it every single day before thanksgiving the dallas is going down third time's a charm uh shout out that guy all next up we have Giants Bears Mitch is back Mitch is back Two really bad interceptions but he has a hip Battled through a terrible hip injury That knocked him out of the last game You have to only imagine the type of pain he was playing through He did throw one of the worst interceptions In the non-jameis division It was obviously a hip injury He under underthrew by about 20 yards.
He had a hip. This is a classic game, though, that actually makes me more mad about the Bears, which shouldn't make sense, but it does because Mitch played average, and the Bears won.
Yeah. And all he has to do is play average, and the Bears can win.
And Khalil Mack came back and had a big play, and it's just so frustrating because you watch. when he can just play average, the Bears can win.
And, like, Khalil Mack came back and had a big play, and it's just so frustrating because you watch.

When he can just play average, the Bears can win games.

And when they just run two-minute offense, they can win games.

I don't understand what Matt Nagy's doing.

Every time they're in a two-minute offense, they look good.

And then they start the second half and they're like,

let's just do the same thing we've been doing that doesn't work.

And every game starts the same way. Let's just do the thing it doesn't work.
We'll go three and out five different times in a row. Everyone will boo, and then we'll run the two-minute offense and it'll look great.
You have to relearn the same lesson every single week. It's like waking up as that guy from Memento.
Matt Nagy, he's crazy enough to do all this weird shit like the egg toss and replaying the double doink over and over again yeah he should just tattoo his mistakes onto himself instead of writing bu on his on his uh play card he's just tattoo it across his forehead there was actually a classic bears moment though when they were going for two got called for pass interference offensive pass interference got pushed back then another penalty push back then missed the extra point yeah i was going to say, Eddie pinero didn't miss any field goals today he missed an extra point but it was a 48 yarder yeah it was a long so many penalties is a very long extra point i i want to say something about saquon real quick yeah because he's starting to make me sad because he's getting sad no well he's getting sad you see his quote he said he keeps reminding the guys that we going to laugh about this. Okay.
We're going to look back. This is the calm before the surface.
This is the bad part. Yeah, we might laugh about it, but that's just to hide all the hurt.
Right. He's got eyes.
I think I called them mugshot eyes at one point, not because he looks like he committed a crime, but they're the eyes of somebody that knows that their life is going to get worse before it gets better right in that instant and on the sidelines he's just thinking about all the shit that he's going to have to go all all the uh losing games that he's going to have to play in where he's going to get 25 carries 72 yards well pat shirmer just keeps running him on like halfback dives a guy who's dynamic in space and he's like let's just run him straight up the middle pat shirmer you should be fired if you make mitch look competent that should be the rule that's remember i made the rule that you uh you you should uh you don't get to be called you don't get to be in the running for coach of the year if you lose the dolphins i think i had that earlier because who did they beat who else did they beat the dolphins beat the redskins so jay gruden not coach oh no no so it wasn't maybe it was I can't remember what it was but something if Brian Flores beat you then like something should happen bad you should lose your job but Pat Shermer should lose his job for making Mitch look average well he looked yeah he looked competent today for Pat Shermer no no no I'm saying Mitch yeah in fact I would argue that that 30 interception that he threw, that was about 15 yards under thrown, that's a plus play for Mitch. Because it's like a slightly below average punt.
No, he was averaging. Which is better than what you'll get mostly.
Yeah, he had two touchdowns. He had a running touchdown, a passing touchdown.
Two interceptions. Whatever.
278 yards. Is it time to ask if maybe Saquon's legs are too big? They give you a nice big target to wrap up if you're trying to tackle them.
I just don't know. If I were a Giants fan, I would be yelling.
I would start a fire Pat Shermer Twitter account and have like four followers and just tweet really mean things to the Giants until they blocked me. That's what I would do if I were a Giants fan.
Is PatShermerFiredYet.net? Right. Make that, yeah.
All the time. Just right at him.
Because you're also in that weird spot where, yeah, the Giants' defense is really bad, but they have some young guys on offense, and how long do you want to have him be the coach and kind of ruin things? And Daniel Jones, you just love fumbling, dude. You love to fumble.
Yeah, he looked pretty bad today. Are we ready to say that Daniel Jones was definitively a better pick than Dwayne Haskins yet? Dwayne Haskins did not look good.
But he didn't look bad at times. I think Daniel Jones has more than Dwayne Haskins thus far than I've seen.
So, the Bears play the Lions on Thanksgiving against Jeff Driscoll. Daniel Jones never missed a snap when the team was in the victory formation because he was taking selfies it's true because i don't think that they've ever run victory formation with daniel jones as a quarterback they won against the box yeah but that was a missed field yeah that was so maybe not they might not have um so the the bears play the lions on thanksgiving then they have uh the cowboys and then if they win those two that's three in a row and I'll be back in.
Okay. What? No, go ahead.
You're saying that you're going to be back in. If they win those two.
So you're already kind of back in. No, no, no.
You're making plans to be back in. No, this is bad.
Yeah. They're really bad.
You're in an escape room right now of your own brain. The problem is.
And you figured out the next two steps to getting yourself out of it. The problem is they're a really, really bad team, but they have the same roster of a really good team last year.
So that's what keeps fucking with my brain. Now, what if the wheels totally come off in Green Bay? Would be a shame, man.
Would be a real shame. I can see a path to you being back in on the Bears.
Would be a real shame. Okay.
Steelers, Bengals, Duck. Duck fucks.
Duck fucks. Duck fucks big time.
I want to just say, to our credit, we don't get a lot of things right on this show. Mason Rudolph being shitty because his face is too big was maybe the best take we've ever had.
That guy stinks. That was obvious.
He is... I've said this before, but at least the Steelers, and they're in the playoffs right now so i think they could actually you know if they they put down put together this you know home stretch they could somehow get in the playoffs which would be incredible considering all that's gone on uh but they at least learned that mason rudolph isn't the guy because you have a guy now mason Rudolph, who in two weeks, what's worse, getting smashed in the head by Miles Garrett or getting benched while playing an 0-10 team? Yeah, getting benched against the Bengals is definitely worse.
If we're going to say, like, what are the worst things that an Ohio team could do to you? I think going up against getting outdueled by Ryan Finley is worse than getting hit in the head with your own helmet. Brutal.
I don't know how. I mean, I hope Mike Tomlin does the right thing.
He did the, you know, I'm not talking about it, Mike Tomlin thing that he does. But I hope he does the right thing and keeps Duck as their quarterback because simply because they're playing the Browns next week and you don't want to give the Browns any extra motivation

with putting that fucking big-ass face behind center

and having everyone be like, that's the guy.

Permission to go there?

Yeah.

I think you might hate Mason Rudolph a little bit

because he doesn't not look like you.

No, he doesn't look like you.

He doesn't not look like you.

No, I don't think he looks like you at all.

He looks like if Matt Moore ate a shitload of sodium. Matt Moore looks like me.
Yeah, if Matt Moore ate a ton of sodium and his face swelled up and his beard fell off. He's a lot prettier than I am.
Macy Rudolph is? Yes, he's got a pretty... He's a good-looking guy.
His face is just too big. If he spent three months in the wild in Alaska, in the Alaskan wilderness, he would come back looking like a JV Matt Moore.
I'm just saying he's – No. There's guys who look like me.
He doesn't look like me. If you put Mason Rudolph in the wind for a couple years, then he's going to start to approach you.
No, he doesn't look like me, and that's why would I hate him. I would love him.
I love Matt Moore. I love Matt Castle and Matt Liner.
I love all the Matt. The thing about Duck is, and I love Duck, and I want to see him play, I think it's almost better if they just keep sending Mason Rudolph out there to start and he keeps getting yanked for Duck.
Because Duck lights a spark in your team. You've got the world junior Duck calling champion coming into the game.
That's always going to make the boys play with a little pep in their stuff. It also helps that you had like a 90 yard touchdown pass where, where the Bengals just, that was the play where you, you watch it.
You said, yeah, the Bengals are actively tanking. Well, it's because the velocity of ducks pass made the receiver go faster when he caught it.
Yeah. Like a little rocket fuel.
I think, do you take chase young? If you're the Bengals or you take Joe Burrow, that's his. That's a tough choice.
They have it. They've got a commanding two-game lead.
Commanding. They play the Dolphins later in the season.
Please flex at the prime time. Oh, my gosh.
I think I would take Chase Young. I think so, too.
I think so, too. So, yeah, the Bengals keep – I don't understand how they can be as competitive as they are and be in like not have stumbled into a win yet right this is what i'm saying like there's no real talk about uh about firing taylor after this season as a head coach because they're competitive right they're just losing every game he's actually doing the world's most perfect job of tanking yeah so the steelers like i said before they if the playoffs started today they'd be your sixth seed, which is incredible to say.
That speaks all the credit in the world to their defense, which has been awesome because their offense has not been good whatsoever. And Mike Tomlin somehow has them like this game against the Browns where it is a loser leaves town because both those teams, if they get hot down the stretch, could get that sixth seed and they play on Sunday.
Yeah, the Browns need to be very careful about asking for duck. They need to back off that for a little bit.
Shout out to the Bengals superfan. I don't know.
We're just calling everyone a superfan nowadays, but shout out to the Bengals fan who is still living on his roof. Yeah.
Who's not allowed to come down until they lose like a scarecrecrow for Santa Claus is up there just hanging out on their shingles. Who definitely just loves the Bengals, and that's why he did it, and it's not because he is not getting along with his wife and wanted to just live on his roof all winter long.
Well, also, as we said earlier, just living on your roof is boss's fault. That's a cool movie.
You've got a treehouse up there. Yeah.
Okay, so speaking of the Browns and next week, let's do Browns Dolphins. i have a sabermetric stat for you i think you probably saw this as well but the browns are three and oh since the introduction of swagger jr sj that's awesome dude swagger is a lucky dog they've lost their best player because he went crazy and hit a guy in the face doesn't help it but that doesn't matter there's three and oh you're three you know a little A little nepotism in the doghouse coming down from his pot.
Was his dad a loser? Are we ready to say that? Yeah. Yeah, Swagger was a loser.
I mean, I think we could have said that a long time ago. Yeah, Swagger Jr., that dog's got a winning set of eyes on him.
Swagger Jr., I mean, you should just send – or Swagger Sr., you should just send him to wherever Hugh Jackson is living.

And just be like, here you go.

Losers love losers.

I can see Hugh Jackson ending up as the dog whisperer, just like with a lot of cast-off mascots.

Yeah.

A good way to get canceled online is to call a dog a loser.

But if we're being honest here, Swagger Sr. was a fucking loser.

Well, it's our job as members of the Fourth Estate and the press to actually speak truth to power.

In this case, Swagger, you're loser fucking loser man loser gave a bad name to mastiffs everywhere leroy actually leroy would be like yo don't lump me in with it he's a bull master yeah i'm a master he's a loser i'm not swagger swagger jr looks like he's got a little uh less round head so probably a little bit more english master Everything about Swagger Jr. is better than Swagger Sr.
That's a fact. He's got a great coat.
All right, so the Jarvis Landry revenge game. Yes.
The game we didn't know we needed for Jarvis Landry to get his revenge. He was awesome.
And this actually started kind of like a college game, like when Oklahoma plays Kansas, because the Dolphins were down 28-0 in a blink of an eye. It was like three and out, three and out.
They did a fake punt that didn't work, and then I think a pick. And you just look down for one second.
You're like, oh, it's 28-0, and they've played the Oklahoma fight song 50 million times. Yep, and Ryan Fitzpatrick had a couple great Ryan Fitzpatrick plays in it too, where he was pump faking while he was five yards downfield past the line of scrimmage.
Yep. And he did the thing where he finds the smallest player in the secondary and runs over him.
Yes. He's very good at that.
So my say something nice about the Dolphins was it was Ryan Fitzpatrick's birthday. That is very nice.
Very nice. And for a moment in time on Saturday, Harvard-Yale was the most talked about college football game.
That's true. He went to Harvard.
Ryan Fitzpatrick went to Harvard. Yeah.
The protest game. That's very nice.
Also, his chin strap, I don't know where it sits in such a comically ridiculous place now because his beard is so long. Yeah, you don't know where it's landing.
You don't know where his chin is. It usually goes somewhere in there.
I think he's a guy that normally wears the chin strap high anyways. Like right underneath his lower lip is usually where it kind of nests in.
It looks like an egg in a bird's nest is his chin strap. Right.
There should be like an egret that comes by and just sits on his chin thinking that it's keeping its little baby warm. Yeah, there's a mother bird that's going to come down and just peck a defender being like, get away from my baby.
It's actually just Ryan Fitzpatrick's chin strap. I thought it was nice before the game that Browns fans were smashing a Mason Rudolph pinata with a helmet.
Yeah, it was blindfolding and just running around and hitting it. That was so muni lot awesome.
That's why I love Browns fans. What do you think is inside the Mason Rudolph pinata? Turnovers.
Turnovers. Cherry turnovers.
A bunch of turnovers. Yeah, a lot of turnovers.
I like that. Maybe just like big head, big bobble heads.
Yeah. Just the bobble.
I'm just glad the Browns, they moved on from dealing with all this violence from their players, and now they're focusing on kareem hunt in the run game yes it's nice to get him back in the mix the uh mason rudolph how many times you think mason rudolph like being like it was actually mason rudolph's fault was said in in the browns tailgating lot today a lot i mean every a billion that that same screenshot with the blue arrow is getting passed around and probably I'd say no fewer than 2,000 group texts inside that parking lot. Every time there was an awkward silence, it was just filled with, you know what, fuck Mason Rudolph.
He kicked him in the nuts. Yeah, what the fuck? He tried to grab his helmet.
He's a fucking guy. I marked this down last week, but I didn't get to address it.
But do you remember that clip from last year when it was Baker Mayfield and Freddie Kitchens on the sidelines? And Freddie said something to Baker. Then Freddie walked away, and Baker's like, that guy's such an idiot, man.
And everyone was like, look at this great chemistry between the player and the coach. They're getting along really – I'm beginning to think that Baker actually wasn't joking when he said that.
Baker's been playing very well, though. Yes.
And they're – now it's the Dolphins, but I think they scored four out of five times going into the red zone.

And it's actually comforting that Baker's playing well and it's been under the radar.

Do you know what I mean?

It feels like he's found his equilibrium where Baker can play well and the Browns can win a couple games and not have everyone freak out.

Maybe it's just because the air was taken out of the tire so early on their season.

But this is where they should be because they're now in a spot

where no one really believes in them.

Yep.

And they're kind of the back to the plucky underdog Browns.

The Browns just never can be, you know, Sports Illustrated cover, GQ cover.

It feels weird.

The Dark Horse team.

That can't happen.

They have to be right where they are right now

where every game's a must win to get in the playoffs. I i have a thought about the browns that i've been entertaining okay i think that they might run the table i think i think that the browns might make the playoffs you might nick right yourself here i think they might no i'm saying the brown they lose to the stealers i think my brain is telling me that they're going to run the table so if i'm wrong it, it's not me.
It's my brain. Okay.
So the Browns, the rest of their schedule, they have. Yeah.
No, they actually definitely can run the table because they have at basically if they beat the Steelers on Sunday, they have the Bengals at home at the Cardinals, the Ravens at home. They've already beaten them and the Ravens might not have that much to play for at the time.
And then, well, they probably will because they can play for the one seed. Well, they could.
It depends if the Patriots lose. And then the Bengals at Cincinnati, week 17.
Yeah. So what will happen is here, they're going to beat the Steelers, beat the Bengals, and then somehow lose to the Cardinals.
I don't know. In just classic Browns fashion.
They'll get above 500, and then everyone will break. And then they'll beat the Ravens and the Bengals.
I hate how much sense that's making. It finished 9-7.
I hate how much sense that's making. All they have to do is beat the Cardinals on that weird 4 o'clock game in the middle of December in the desert.
But Cleveland, I believe in Cleveland right now. That's a bad, close your eyes.

Browns at Cardinals, that's a weird game.

That's a weird game.

Color-wise, they don't match up.

That's a weird game.

Weird shit's going to happen there.

Okay, let's go next to Panther Saints.

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It should be three or five people. It's like boxing judges kind of.
So get more people involved. But that led me to have a different idea, which is they should take all the coaches that are on bye weeks and have them all vote.
They should be like a council. But there'll be grudges.
But all the votes should be public. Okay.
So what happens when there's no bi-weeks? Then that's another issue that we're going to have to delve into. That happens every year.
Yeah, I'm going to have to regroup and get back to you on that one. That happens like many weeks every year.
I would just like to see coaches be involved in the process. Okay.
Because they're the ones that complain about it the most. Well, I don't hate that idea because you could also have – there would be – you'd have to talk about the strategy going into the bye week.
Be like, hey, Andy Reid has a bye week. Maybe we shouldn't challenge anything because there's no way he's going to get it right.
Yeah. That's true.
You have to think about the brains that you're going to be dealing with. Who is it this week? Okay, you know, we probably don't want to risk this one.

Jason Garrett clap once for overturn, twice

for keep it as it stands. Jason Garrett would just

stare at it and just watch it loop

endlessly and not say a word. I do

applaud the NFL for sticking

to their general application

of any rule, which is always fuck over the

Saints. Yeah.
So, I mean, it is

consistent. It was hilarious, and everyone got their

jokes off, and it was hilarious to see.

Shout out to Sean Payne for getting

Thank you. of any rule, which is always fuck over the Saints.
Yeah. So, I mean, it is consistent.
It was hilarious, and everyone got their jokes off, and it was hilarious to see. Shout out to Sean Payne for getting engaged, too.
He did? Yeah, he got engaged. Oh.
And in the picture, big nipple picture. Of course.
Dude, ever since he did CrossFit, he's been a nip guy. He cut the ring himself with those diamond cutters and those raisins that he's smuggling.
He's a big-time nip guy. He should wear a bra.
As someone who's thought about wearing a bra before, he should wear a bra. The Saints can win the division on Thursday night, mostly thanks to the Panthers kicker, Joey Sly, who does not look like a kicker.
He's the swole kicker. I don't like that.
I don't like the swole kicker. I don't like a kicker that looks like he drives a pickup truck or is trying to escape from his true nature of being a kicker.
He is so swole that when he got, I don't think he got drafted, but when he joined the Panthers, a bunch of guys were confused when he started nailing kicks. They're like, I thought you were a linebacker.
Yeah. I don't like that.
It doesn't work. He's not going to make the big kick.
I'm sorry. i like my kickers to be vaguely european maybe go as far as to do the one barefoot thing like be quirky be weird be small look like no one talks to you on the team yes you can't have it have it be a kicker where everyone's like oh maybe that guy's actually friends with someone other than the long snapper yeah if you're a jacked up kicker you're just you're trying to get away from being a kicker instead of embracing it.
That tells me that you've got mental issues. Okay, so for this game, I wrote down, and I actually saw Sean Payton mention it, I think, on Friday, but I'm ready to hop on board that Michael Thomas should be the MVP.
So there has never been a wide receiver that's won MVP, which is crazy. Crazy, crazy, crazy.
And we're talking about the, I think it's the coach's poll. There's been other, like, there's other polls and stuff.
There has never been the last wide receiver to get an MVP vote. 1998 Randy Moss.
You know what the problem with giving him an MVP is, though? You give him an MVP, and then his name becomes part of, like, an unbelievable stat, which which is can you believe that Randy Moss and Jerry Rice never won an MVP that's fine though I'm willing to do it because it should and here's what's pushing me over the edge with Michael Thomas this year one he is most likely going to break Marvin Harrison's record for receptions in a season he had I think 143, 143 in 2002. Michael Thomas has 94 right now through 11 games.
So I think if he, he's pretty much averaging like 10, 10 a game. So he'll get right close to it.
And I think they'll probably force the ball to him if, if he's close to getting that. Sean Payton would absolutely do something like that.
Two, he's done it with two different quarterbacks. And I think that that speaks more.
Like, you know how they always make the argument, well, it's the most valuable player to your team, so it would be hard for a wide receiver to win MVP because you're saying, well, it's the quarterback throwing him the ball. He's kept the Saints afloat by being so steady through Drew Brees' injury, Teddy Bridgewater, and then Drew Brees coming back.
Taysom Hill, too. So really three different quarterbacks.
And then three, I always forget, but it needs to be mentioned, he has the greatest Twitter handle for a player. It's at can't guard Mike.
I mean, come on. That's awesome.
I can't believe the Twitter handle was still available right now. At can't guard Mike, he is just telling you in his Twitter handle that you will not be able to guard him yeah so you don't think that it's going to be in your mind if you had a vote i had four he's better at uh the position that the leading the leading guy right now lamar jackson is also a wide receiver he's a lot better at wide receiver than him that's true so there's four okay got it um man patrick mah is going to hit us up after this one.
Let us know he's upset with us. Damn, Michael Wilbon.
But yeah, I think that he's a really good wide receiver. I think that obviously he makes that Saints offense go.
He's not going to win MVP. I'm just saying.
Yeah, he's not going to win. He should be considered.
It's fun to throw him in the mix. He should be considered.
It's crazy to not at least say. I know it's going to come down to probably Lamar Jackson and and i don't know i mean russell wilson wasn't great today but he should be considered for mvp vote i will consider michael thomas for my mvp there we go that's all i'm asking all i'm changing minds one step at a time i want him to get one mvp vote that's all we need to get the list of the mvp voters and just you know what that fucking that fucking little shithead Prisco probably has a vote.
I'm sure he does. So Prisco, listen up.
You love being contrarian. You love blocking people and saying C on Twitter.
How about you vote for Michael Thomas and be the contrarian that everyone gets mad at? Well, he hates running backs enough to the point where he would think about voting for a wide receiver. I actually love you, Prisco.
You're, I mean, I do. I read all his stuff.
He's awesome. I also made a note at halftime.
Sean Payton likes to flex sometimes. And a lot of coaches, they try to do the copy Belichick thing where they don't say anything about how they're going to adjust what they saw that went wrong in the first half.
Sean Payton was like, watch out for Kamara. We're going to get Kamara the ball.
We need to feed Kamara. And then they come out and they hit him like three times in a row right after that.
Damn. I think he was just trying to flex with Tracy Wolfson.
I do like that. Being like, look, I'm going to put my balls on the table.
Then I'm going to follow through. And he probably walked in the locker room.
He's like, you ever have that thing where like you get engaged and then every chick wants to fuck you? Yeah. That's definitely what he said afterwards.
He's absolutely feeling himself a little bit. He's like, Tracy, he was giving me those eyes.
She's giving me the eyes. It's like sucks.
her, I was like, you know what? When I said that I was going to give Kamara the ball, she was like undressing me with eyes. I'm a taken man.
Sorry, Tracy. Yeah, so do you feel confident in the Saints? Yeah, well, I do.
I do. But they don't have shit to play for.
It sucks that their division is so bad. I agree.
Because they could kind of take the foot off the gas for the next four weeks

and they'd be fine.

I'll say this.

I feel confident in everyone in the Saints except Drew Brees.

Okay.

Let's get that take going.

Drew Brees is still very good,

but he's going to have to make a few big-time deep throws.

I don't know if he still has it.

I have noticed.

For those throws.

Listen, I think.

He's for all the other ones.

I don't know if he still has it. I have no those throws.
Listen, I think for all the other ones, I think that he still has most of it. But I have noticed over the last couple of weeks when he does his little squat down in the huddle, you know how he like usually takes that big lunge and he usually doesn't put the knee down.
He's usually supporting himself in a lunge. He's been putting the knee down, taking a little bit of weight off, taking little breaks between plays.
That's the first thing that goes. The Saints might be good enough and talented enough to not need him to do that, but that's my biggest concern is in a playoff game, in a big-time moment, Drew Brees has to hit an open guy 30 yards down the field.
Can he do it? I don't know. They're probably going to have have to go up against some refs decisions as well.
Yep. They're going to have to battle through the Zebras to get there.
Okay, next up we got Raiders and Jets. The Raiders.
I guess if you throw out a stinker, you might as well really stink. So much so that we had Mike Glennon get in the game,

and he did first three snaps, fumbled twice.

So that's Mike Glennon.

I actually believed in him at one point in my life.

And then Gruden, after the game, said,

ever been on a boat that's sinking?

Which is the most relatable.

Who hasn't been on a boat that's sinking?

I hope not.

Yeah, but that's a harsh thing to say real quick after you guys were riding high a minute ago yeah it's tough it was very tough and so he also gave a shout out to all the raiders fans that came out in new jersey i guess there's a shitload of raiders fans that were there today really being very loud in the stadium he was sorry i think john gruden has just developed a love with the black hole so much he has he always kind of feels like he has to represent for him which is a good quality to have in a coach i think well and i actually would say that it's partly in part because he was an underdog when he came back we made the jokes everyone made the jokes that it wouldn't work and it's starting to work and i think he probably says hey these black hole guys they're the only ones who thought that i would actually be able to do this yeah i mean gruden did a great job of making himself the underdog as he was getting 10 years 10 million dollars a year 100 million dollars guaranteed to go move to las vegas right it's tough for that guy to become an underdog but somehow he has um so yeah so that's bad for the raiders playoff hopes they were riding high they now have to go to kansas city next week after and Andy Reid and a bye. Just alert that.
Can't do that. Put that on an alert.
Yep. Andy Reid and a bye.
But yeah, Gruden afterwards was like, I'm emotional about this loss. I don't want to talk about it.
It's also Andy Reid after Thanksgiving, though. So he's going to be a little lethargic.
A little bit sleepy. You have to imagine a few plates of mac and cheese.
Those eyes going to do the slow nod off where you're just like, okay. He's probably spent the last – since this was a bye week, he's probably had his turkey brining and marinating and working up some crazy new recipes for it that he saw on the barefoot Contessa.
Yeah. All right.
So we have also in this game Sam Darnold is like, I think this is coming out three weeks.

The Jets have scored 34 points three weeks in a row. He's officially over the mono.
Exactly 34 points. And he looks awesome.
So if you're a Jets fan, are you one mad because all you had to do was beat the Bills week one in a game that you were up at half? or beat the Dolphins, who were still actively trying to tank,

to be realistically in this playoff race or two, you're just happy that Sam Donald looks like the quarterback. I think you're just happy.
Okay. It looks like the quarterback because they're dangerously close.
If the jets keep winning, they're dangerous. It's almost better to say that we would have been able to make the playoffs if he was healthy then to have Donald go out in some of those games and stink stink it up yeah i just i know that if i were a jets fan i'd be i'd be like two wins away from just staring at the box scores of those dolphins and bills games and being like why but that's a much better feeling to have than to actually have donald go out there and ruin one of those games true like the burden of expectation that goes along with being a successful team and being the New York Jets,

that's going to be worse to deal with than being almost good,

but not quite getting there because your quarterback made out with a 21-year-old

in Hoboken.

True.

If they win out, you'll go – Jets fans will be mad that they lost those games.

If they win out.

Yeah.

Can you imagine –

Because they'd be in that 9-7, we don't have a draft pick, or we don't have a good draft pick, and all we had to do was beat the Dolphins or the Bills. Imagine how many head coaching jobs Greg Williams is going to turn down this offseason.
He's going to have to hire a guy. He's going to have to hire a guy to just say, nope, you can't do it.
Like a reverse Kevin Hart. Sorry, he's not taking on any more projects.
The other story from this game is the NFL's rules on how and when you can hit a quarterback is still a joke. And Cleet Blakeman, who it's such a joke that he is a rat.
Well, a name like Cleet Blakeman should never be in charge of anything. He sounds like a parody Twitter account.
If your name's, yeah, it does. Jeff Foxworthy trope.
Yeah. If your name's Cleet Blakeakeman you should maybe be in charge of like a uh petting zoo yeah that's about as high as you should advance muffler shop uh mufflers those i don't know carburetors that same thing i don't think you have i don't think you have the business acumen if your name's cleat blake maybe maybe a uh uh what do you call them the spoilers that you put on the back of your yeah yeah yeah some aftermarket some spoilers that go on he can specialize in in putting spoilers on civic si's yeah motorcycle accessory shop so not actually knows how to fix a motorcycle but if you want like the sweet fire stripes down your hog cleat blakeman shop shop got him yeah he's or at least he can be the customer service guy there and process returns yeah but he sucks yeah he sucks did you see how funny that call was he's been a terrible referee for years and years and that one was so so i don't even know what he was what was he calling he he was standing right there and it was the most like football play i've ever seen and he just threw it in disgust yeah that's a roughing the past.
I'm just going to say this right now. He's out of the running for Blake of the year.
Yep. Sorry, Cleet Blakeman.
Get out of here, dude. Um, all right, before we do the next one, quick word from our friends at, we're going to get right back to the show.
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Alright, back

to part of my take.

Seahawks-Eagles. Real quick, I want to jump back

to the Raiders just for one second because I had

a thought during the game. What do you think

Mark Davis does when he goes out

in New York? I don't know

if he comes to New York. You don't think he makes that trip?

I feel like he has to. That's a long time to be on a Southwest flight.
I don't think that they run from Oakland. I think he's probably a ghost tour guy.
Whatever city he goes to, he goes on the ghost tour. He stays in New Jersey.
He kind of looks like a ghost. He goes to the mall.
Yeah, gets some good exercise. Yeah, just walks around.
Yeah, you're probably right. And he probably fits in pretty well.
actually probably went to sopranos con yeah that's right rocking the jumpsuits yeah what do you bubble what do you think oh bubba's here by the way hank's not here today hank's on vacation mall sounds whoa mall sounds pretty good for mark davis you think he goes to lids i think i think he goes to lids and tries on every hat and doesn't buy anything no i don't think he goes to Lids he goes to the kiosk that makes you custom hats like the embroidery where they'll write something on it and it just says Mark he probably buys the Raiders hats that he doesn't know he can get for free yeah that's true there's a whole box for him in his office and he doesn't know and he's like oh that's oh, that's cool. Well, or he thinks like, oh, well, actually, I'm paying myself because we get the revenue split.
Uh-huh. So it's a little scheme he's got in his brain where he's like, if I buy all the Raiders gear.
It's his pyramid scheme. I then get the kickback.
Uh-huh. I could see him going, spending a lot of time in the big dog store, but not buying anything, looking at all the shirts and just having a good laugh.
Yeah. Just like laughing out loud.
And one shirt. Hun, look at oh there's no hun takes a picture what are you talking about security guard no i'm talking about the employee of the oh yeah yeah i was like oh there's no there's definitely not a mrs david no looking around with him if you spend most of your time at hooters and pf chance everyone's a hun yeah he's definitely there's no real hun yeah he yeah he goes to the Walmart $5 shirts and laughs at all of them.
And actually, he definitely uses – This one's called Big Johnson. Yeah, he uses those jokes later on in the night at P.F.
Chang's. He's like, hey, he's a big guy, gives you facts from a Snapple bottle kind of guy.
All right, Seahawks-Eagles. We got to have a conversation about Carson Wentz.

Yeah, we do.

There's actually both Carsons in this game.

Bad Carson game today.

Yeah, but Carson Wentz.

So I think this actually was the game.

Wait, please frame it in relation to whether or not he's better than Dak Prescott.

Yeah, so I think this was the game that has finally shifted Eagles fans from being blind Carson Wentz apologists there's not ditching him but I could feel the tide shifting on Twitter where it's like people are starting to say hey when you yeah your receivers suck and your offensive line sucks but when you miss a a guy wide open on a three-yard out, that's not on your receiver, that's on you. And he's now had two games in a row that have looked really bad, four turnovers.
Is Carson Wentz, here's what it comes down to, PFT, and I want you to answer it. Is Carson Wentz a bad quarterback or is Carson Wentz a good quarterback going through a bad run? I think he's a bad quarterback that has gone through good runs.
Because it's weird. Until he got good.
And I think he's been who he is his entire career. He's lost a little bit of his mobility, I think, over the last two years.
I think overall he's like a perfectly average quarterback that every now and again shows you glimpses of exactly how excited you were two years ago he's not a franchise quarterback then I think he's an average franchise quarterback that's not a franchise quarterback I don't know what a franchise quarterback I mean it's a guy who you can basically say demon no franchise quarterback to me is a guy who you can say for the next 10 years we will have this quarterback and we will make the playoffs as long as he's healthy I think I'm gonna I'm gonna mark this in uh the he's injured but he doesn't want to say how injured he is well he did have an x-ray for his hand so that's a good thing for Carson Wentz that he can kind of lean on that not that he's trying to but I I actually think I've always kind of thought Carson Wentz was a franchise quarterback and and I still see it, but man, he was bad today. I'll put it this way.
Right now they're what, 5-6? 5-6. Okay.
They can still win the division. They absolutely can win the division.
They actually have a far easier schedule than the Cowboys. They have the at the Dolphins.
That's a win. Giants.
That's a win. At the Redskins.
That's a win. So they're going to win the next three games, and then they have a home game against dallas week 16 and if they win that they have the giants at the giants week 17 so they the we could be sitting here in six weeks and be like remember when cars once had that bad game and then they won five in a row without a doubt because they'll get all alshon back they'll get lane johnson back i'm just saying this is the first time I've felt in my own assessment of Carson Wentz that maybe he's not the guy that I thought he was.
It's like if you have a bad cough. You can shake off a cough for a while, but the second that a little bit of blood comes up in your cough, you're like, now I need to go see.
Now something's an issue. Right.
The three yard out that you're talking about, that was the blood cough. It was like a good quarterback doesn't miss this throw unless there's a problem.
So there's a problem. There is a problem.
I don't know what the problem is. I'm not a mechanic.
I could feel Philly fans kind of being like, oh, this is weird because this is not what we've been defending. And they have a right to defend because his wide receivers have been trashed and his offensive line is banged up this year but man there are some things you're like that's fucking weird man he's not the guy that you thought he was um all right rest of the game didn't help the kj right said after the game they knew exactly what the eagles were doing calling out their plays before they ran them that probably doesn't help not great that is always a bad thing to have a defender say after the game yeah it's not great uh russell wilson continues to be even his bad games are good games yeah he had some misses today where it was like what's going on with him that was an ugly win for the seahawks where they probably could have won by like three scores um but yeah wins a win i don't know what this says about me when i'm watching football but i can identify when a flea flicker is coming before the defense can.
I don't know if that's the camera angle or whatever. And I get so excited when I pick it out, when I know that it's going to be thrown back to the quarterback before the announcers know, before the defenders know on the field.
Well, you have to test this now. Oh, I have to call them out? Yeah.
Okay. Because this could also be...
I think I would bat like 95% on flea flick Because this could also be dad territory where you know how everyone's dad just calls out every play. And then the three he gets right, he's like, called it.
Yeah. That would suck if I was a dad without the whole sex part.
Right. You just have.
I got all the worst parts of being dad. Because how many have you been calling? We got to see it.
I nail them. No, I'm telling you.
I feel like I'm nailing him at like 95, 96% clips right now. And you're saying you call it out before the running back turns his body? Before I see the defense react to it.
I diagnose a flea flicker better than any NFL defense. Now, is that defenses are slow? Defensive.
They haven't caught up to my head yet. To your head are you calling it when they're like when the running back's actually throwing it backwards i call it the second the running back takes like that one slower step that tells me he's not attacking all right so yeah we gotta see it it's very tricky with levy on bell i should say that because he could be doing it on any given play which is why defenses that's probably why he averages so many yards per carry because the safeties kind of have to stay back and respect the flea flicker.
So we watch a lot of football together, so you start doing that, and I will report honestly back. But I believe you.
I just want to see it in action. I wouldn't make this up.
No, of course not, but I want to see it in action because I don't think I've ever heard you do it, so now you've got to start saying it out loud. Okay, I do say it out loud to myself.
Now you also get get negative points for flea flicker that you didn't say anything oh of course yeah if it happens and you're like if i'm caught off guard if i bite on the on the play fake yeah i'll be the first two minutes that might even be minus two if you call flea flicker that doesn't happen i know because if you call yeah if you call yeah if you call flea flicker that isn't a flea flicker that's an issue that's a minus two i thought you were saying that if you I know because if you call, yeah, if you call, yeah, if you call, yeah, if you call a flea flicker that isn't a flea flicker, that's an issue.

That's a minus two.

I thought you were saying that if you fail to recognize a flea flicker.

If you, if it happens and you don't say anything, that's minus one.

Okay.

And then you get plus one for every time you get it right.

Okay.

Yeah.

All right.

So we'll just tell you're score on that one.

Yeah.

And you should be, you should be significantly in the plus.

I should be.

I know that it will be.

Okay.

Very good.

All right.

I believe in you.

I believe in you. Thank you.
So yeah, the, the Eagles are probably still going to in the plus. I should be.
I know that I will be. Okay.
All right. I believe in you.
I believe in you. Thank you.
So, yeah, the Eagles are probably still going to make the playoffs somehow, even though they've lost two games in a row where their offenses look terrible. But their schedule lines up perfectly for them.
Yeah, and I don't think the Cowboys are any good right now. So, I would actually bet on the Eagles making it out of the NFC.
Do it. NFC East.
Do it. All right.
Lions, Redskins, Jeff Driscoll. Nope.
Nope. Nope.
He had about 1.5 Daltons on the moxie meter. Two interceptions in the final minute of the game.
That's hard to do. Two in the final minute? And it's not like it was garbage time.
It's not like they were. Yeah.
You needed those. This was serious time here.
The big story, though, obviously, is Dwayne Haskins' selfie. Yeah.
Or was it a or was it just a picture? No, he took the phone. It was a selfie, so he thought the game was over at that point.
He ran to the sidelines, was taking selfies with the fans. Meanwhile, Case Keenum was getting pulled out onto the field to take a knee at the very end of the game.
And if you thought that Joe Theismann was going to watch this and let this slide, buddy, you don't know Joe Theismann. Because he saw and he was like, this is Bush League stuff.
And his prostate was swelling up just out of sheer anger at Dwayne. He's not going to pee for a week.
Okay. I saw it.
I really don't want to think it's a big deal. But I don't think Dwayne Haskins played well enough to take a selfie while the game is still going on.
I think my biggest issue was I started to think about other quarterbacks and imagining other quarterbacks doing this and finding themselves in that position. And I was having a tough time pulling out names that weren't bad quarterbacks to be compared to.
Right. Like, I could see Jameis doing this.
Yeah, Jameis is a Hall of Famer. I could see Johnny Manziel doing this.

Yeah.

I could see Swag would absolutely do this.

Swag would definitely do this.

But we don't know about Swag yet.

Jury's still out on him.

Swag would 100% do that.

Literally.

I think, let's see, who else that's currently in the league?

Paxton Lynch.

Paxton Lynch would do it, for sure, if you ever won a game.

I want to take a picture.

Actually, no, someone would ask Paxton Lynch if he would take the picture yeah of us of yeah don't put yourself in it right and your mustache so yeah i really don't because it is one of those weird things where if you are too mad about it and i'm not mad about it at all but if you're too mad about it you're telling on yourself that's like come on that's ridiculous but he did not play well enough to do that if he had four touchdowns and 400 yards i'd be like fuck it do whatever you want he's in that spot where he's been so bad and redskins fans want him to be good that just winning a game where he's not even good and they're like look at it he coming along. And he was, I think he completed less than half of his passes and he had an interception and no touchdowns.
They won. They won.
I think it was his first career win, actually. Right.
Maybe that's how I'll explain this away in my own day. He was excited to get that first win in front of that huge home field advantage.
But you know, I mean, I can tell you, I obviously do the the same thing i spent the fucking first five minutes of the show saying mitch was was good or i think he said he was average he probably wasn't but when you're so bad that you have to convince yourself even uh halfway decent or not even a halfway decent like a not bad performance is somehow good that's when you know you're in a bad spot well also duane's young yeah he's really really young yeah so I mean I can't I can't blame him too much for that I'm not mad at him for doing that at all no but it's just like a class it was a weird move I can't imagine it happening to a competent organization confetti quarterback no we'll see yeah I don't even know it means you can close your eyes and picture them getting confetti on their face oh I'm in the Super Bowl. I'm so delusional.
I can close my eyes and imagine any quarterback getting confetti. Shout out Steven Che.
No, but I just think I'm putting it not mad, weird move. Weird move.
And doesn't really make sense with how he played. Okay.
I can agree to that. Yeah.
I also made a note here at the end of the game. Dustin Hopkins, before he kicked that field goal,

he was standing on the sidelines next to the space heater that they have,

just holding his leg out, holding his shoe, his right foot,

directly in front of the space heater, heating it up.

And I love – I'm a sucker. You've got to get hot.

I am a sucker for any sort of story about a kicker doing weird shit to their shoe.

You've got to get hot.

Like, I think the Redskins had a kicker a few years ago

who would bake his shoe in an oven for a couple hours before the game to shrink it so it would be like three sizes smaller than the no i just like i like a good kicker shoe store i agree i agree you have to get hot any way you can so uh the lions season was already over but it's really over don't bring matt saffert back is really what the lions should be focused on and uh matt patricia i would like to see better posture out of Matt Patricia. It's not going well.
It's not going well for the Lions. Thanksgiving Day is going to be very interesting when the Bears play the Lions.
It's an affront to football and the sport we love. To have those two teams playing? Yeah.
It's going to be terrible. To me, that is the epitome of Thanksgiving football.
It's going to be really bad. Take the under.
The Lions should have to play and lose to the worst team in the NFL every Thanksgiving. Ugh.
And I mean, I don't. Actually, no.
I want the Bears to win because remember, I think they're back. But my big thing is the Bears tanking for strength of schedule.
Oh, for next year, they get to play the division losers. They don't have their first-round pick.
The other division losers. Yeah, it's only two games that matter to change schedule-wise.
But that's kind of cool. But, yeah, no, you'd rather play those teams.
Yeah, I'd rather play those two teams. Okay, Tennessee-Jacksonville.
I don't know what to make of Tennessee. They're so confusing.
I wrote down some of their wins and losses this year. They beat the Browns 43-13.
They beat the Chiefs last week or two weeks ago. They beat the Jaguars today 42-20.
They lost to the Broncos 16-0, and they lost to the Jaguars 20-7. They're schizophrenic, but I think they are our biggest case of did something, did they light the spark, did they turn the corner when they beat the Chiefs I think that can we say that I think maybe I mean Derek Henry is a problem like impossible to solve I got a stat for you ready uh-huh uh Derek Henry after November 10 from November 10th or later since 2017 so late in the season the last three years he's averaging 5.74 yards per carry.
Guys just don't want to tackle him at the end of the season. Are you fucking kidding me? I don't want to tackle him either.
I want to give a shout-out to whoever it was that somehow kept Derrick Henry from being switched positions when he was in high school. Yes.
Because you know that there was a coach at some point that was like, this is going to be a tight end. This guy's awesome.
This guy's going to be a defensive end or like an offensive tackle or something like that. He was so big, and he's always been big his entire life.
But for some reason, Derrick Henry was able to be like, fuck you, I'm going to be a running back. Right.
And not get pushed to a different position. Right.
Which is crazy for someone that's 6'3", like 245 pounds. Yes.
So whoever that person was in Derrick Henry's life, I want to thank you for not allowing him to be bullied. I'd agree with that.
I like that take. He really is a guy you just don't want to tackle, and he scored two touchdowns today in 16 seconds.
That game was crazy because it was 7-3 at half, and then you blinked, and it was all of a sudden a game being played in the 30s and 40s.

Yeah, I think just from a physical standpoint

of having to run into the end zone twice in the span of 16 seconds,

that's just impressive on its own.

Yes.

Right there, and one of them was like a 70-yard touchdown.

Yeah.

Right?

Yeah, yeah.

And then they fumbled the kickoff, the Jaguars did,

and then he scored again.

Yeah, that's very, very impressive.

Are the Titans going to convince themselves that Ryan Tannehill is the guy? He is the guy. Change of scenery is all it took for Ryan Tannehill.
This is going to be tragic because they're going to give him a three-year deal and then next year he's going to be just Ryan Tannehill again. Well, that's fine.
It's so tragic when that happens. He's going to take the next step.
He is in the process. What we're seeing right now is him taking the next step in front

of our very eyes. And that's the

difference between good Nashville and bad

Nashville. Yeah.
Is Ryan Tannehill's now

playing. So the Titans are officially one

of those teams because now the AFC

as bad as the AFC is

it's made for a really

fun last month

and a half of football because

you have like three or four teams that are all in there like could make the playoffs and the titans are one of them the titans are six and five they get hot they play the colts next week that's another loser leaves town game so the titans and colts are both six and five raiders six and five steelers six and five and browns five and six all those teams could be the team that gets hot and gets that sixth seed and gets in the playoffs I think that it was just today right that the Dolphins were eliminated from playoff contention oh they might have been yeah there are a lot of teams that are still in the hunt is what I'm getting at yes there are a lot of teams still in the hunt did you see that there was a big bust of illegal baloney that was coming across the border in El Paso?

Really?

It was like a record-setting bust of frozen baloney.

Yeah, I was going to say Marone was probably pretty broken.

He might have something to do with it.

It might be the El Chapo of lunch meats.

What do the Jaguars do now?

I think you just go back to Jacksonville, play some golf.

That's tough.

Here's what they do.

Verbal meme, Doug Marone is Wolverine, and he's looking at a picture. And the picture is Blake Bortles.
Yep. That's a fact.
That's a fact. You don't know what you got until it's gone.
And that's what the Jags are dealing with right now. You know it, Jags fans.
At least Blake was fun. Nick Foles is just depressing when he's playing and not playing well.
Maybe put Gardner in. Spark.
Do you put Gardner in if you're out of, yeah, if you're out of playoff contention. Another spark.
All right, before we do the last game, PFT, why don't you do a quick ad? Yeah, I want to talk to you guys about our good, good friends at, we're going to get right back to the show. Lowe's knows that your deadlines don't change, when your job does.
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Alright, back to part of my take.

I love this tweet by

Kevin Slane that

we just retweeted. A tale of the

completely broken online sports model

in three acts. Okay.
Part of my take

posts an obviously photoshopped image of a Redskins fan protest as a joke what do you mean obviously that's not obvious triggs did an excellent job of making them not look like characters close to obvious they looked like uh you did at least you had at least open the picture that's true no it wasn't to know it was obvious that's true without zooming in at all it didn't completely fake. It's true.
A single, likely overworked blogger gets fooled. I don't know why you have to just go with that.
Likely overworked? How do we know that? A single, like what? Dude, it's tired to just be like, oh yeah, all bloggers don't, you know, they fuck their hands. Oh, got it.
Yeah. Overworked.
Oh, you mean all bloggers are overworked. Ahger not a single like marital status all right content sharing means false story ends up on four plus out outlets and by four plus outlets he means i think he just means yard barker well it's sports not it's all from yard barker and it's like facebook distinct at yard barkere.com no I have that bookmarked so yeah that's the broken model sorry by us we shouldn't have done this clearly obvious again I don't think it was clearly obvious Patriots Cowboys to end the recap Hank's not here Liam's here's here.
Do you want to call him? Yeah. He actually just texted me like as we were recording, like, yo, everything Gucci.
Okay. And then was like being real nice.
Like, how'd your move go? He's definitely going to fall for it. He's feeling bad.
All right. So Hank's not here.
So before we do that, let's read. Also, we had a backup plan.
Our good friend, from nelly who has a rivalry with hank we're gonna call him turns out uh tom's not a real football guy because he's gonna go sweep at like midnight classic single overworked blogger dude it's midnight on a sunday you go sweep um it's actually 1 a.m all right he's he wrote i had uh these ready to go if we had called them. Tom Brady wants to play until he's 50 but can't complete 50% of his passes.
Oh, so he was going to say that as Hank? He was going to say this as Hank when we called him. It's okay that the Cowboys got called for a bullshit penalty because it makes up for the times the NFL wouldn't let the Patriots get away with cheating.
That's true. No, that's true.
And then follow me on Twitter at Henny's, which is totally not a nickname. I gave myself 15.
That burns. That is tough.
And that's our good friend Tom Fornelli continuing the rivalry. Okay, let's go.
So Hank is taking a vacation, just a one day vacation. He's not here.
And we thought we'd him and have liam just be like the recording got fucked up and pft and and big cat already left and what should i do so just just don't even just say just just run with it we're not even gonna ask him about the patriots game because i don't want to hear him get mad about turnover luck and everything no he's he's moved on now he's on penalty luck penalty luck so just fuck with him be really serious and at the end we're just like you're just kidding

dude this we're at the patriots segment of the uh of the show he's probably drunk

he's definitely drunk

yo um i just closed audition and like i just the the files seem like it's

just yo um i just closed audition and like i just the the files seem like it's just not the right size for like what it is they're still i'm still uploading them right now um can i just like facetime you and then like you'll just see all right all right so then i'll just have you face on him. Yeah.
All right. Give it to me.
He's going to be so sad. He's drunk right now and he's pissed.
Are you asleep? Why are you going to bed so early, Hank still doing the show the files aren't corrupt at all the files are fine were you mad were you upset were you scared I was very scared I wasn't mad alright okay we'll see you tomorrow congrats on the Patriots Hank we're actually at the Patriots portion of the show right now. You have anything to say about a turnover luck? No.
Oh, shit. Sorry.
My bad. That sucks.
That got cut off. Yeah.
All right. Patriots, Cowboys, Jason Garrett's a fucking idiot.
Yeah. To be fair to Jason Garrett, he had his mind played with all week by Master Puppet Master Bill Belichick.
So Belichick was talking about a story. There was a story out in the news this week that Belichick wanted to be the Cowboys head coach back in the day when he got fired from the Browns.
Okay. Slash Ravens.
That he wanted to coach for the Cowboys. Okay.
And then Garrett had to deal with all the media fallout that came from that and just imagining that Jerry Jones would much rather have Belichick than him.

Yes.

So, like, knowing that his boss knows that he made a mistake going down this path.

Okay, fair.

But he's dumb.

And exactly what we thought would happen would happen.

He got outcoached, which isn't really – I mean, Bill Belichick's the best coach in nfl history but jason garrett really truly is stupid uh zekia elliott was running and running well and the patriots if you had one thing that you could say about them it's probably that they you can run on them a little bit because their past defense is fantastic stefan gilmore is the defensive player of the year but he touched the ball. I think he had six rushes in the second half.
And then he did the Dan Quinn special. Down seven with six minutes left to go.
Fourth and seven on the Patriots 11. You're in New England.
You're trying to beat the New England Patriots. You kicked a field goal.
It's more points. You kicked a field goal, you fucking idiot.
Why? I don't know. Because the camera kept cutting back from Jason Garrett to Belichick and they both were wet and the wind was blowing on the sidelines and it looked like it had an ad for the lighthouse and Garrett got all panicky and was like, I better take the points while I can on the road.
And then it turns out that the math didn't quite work out in his favor on that one. You can expect him to be perfect i'm actually at the point too because jerry jones did a all-time jerry jones in the hallway press conference after where he said with the makeup of this team i shouldn't be this frustrated we have the talent so the talent isn't the problem um what else could it be okay right so jerry this is you're we're at a point now where guess what? I don't feel bad for you, dude.
You should have fired him a while ago. It's on you.
The fact that he's still the coach, you can't be mad. That is your fault.
And he gave him a vote of confidence, too. And he gave him a vote of confidence.
He said he's going to be our coach for the rest of the season. Has there ever been a coach that's been fired in the same year? Let's say that the Cowboys were in first place in week 15 or whatever, and they go on to win that division.
Has there ever been a coach fired right before their team won the division? Right before the playoffs. Right before the playoffs.
I could see him doing it. It's just crazy to me that Jerry Jones keeps complaining about Jason Garrett when you are the one person who can change this problem it's i mean it is it really is your it's it's it's the uh drill tweet like someone help me with my budget yeah he's spending too much on candles every month yeah and you're spending too much money on j on a bad coach it would be helpful if jason garrett ever said a word and i know we mentioned it earlier but he he really doesn't talk ever and it's bizarre yeah for as much time as he gets on the camera his beady little mouth never it never opens up so I don't know what he does in terms of coaching right what decisions is he making um I think he just yeah I don't know he just kind of hangs out and uh beats up on really bad teams which I want to have a little discussion about Dak Prescott for a second here.
Dak Prescott, who has been very good this year, Dak Prescott, whenever he plays like a big-time opponent, it feels like he doesn't step up to it. And, you know, the Patriots defenses will make anyone not look great, but he is 5-13 against winning teams since 2016.

So really not great.

So really not great.

And when you think about the games this year, like, okay,

they lost to the Saints in New Orleans.

They lost to the Packers at home.

They lost to the Vikings at home.

They lost to the Patriots in New England.

They have beaten up on some really shitty teams,

and the rest of the schedule has been not so great. Well for him he plays in the NFC East yeah he gets to play six games against really shitty teams I'm just saying don't you don't you have that feeling where Dak Prescott he's got to win one of these big games for me to be like okay now I really feel because he is a good quarterback and you can't he's not like he is uh i don't know wherever you want of the floating tiers or whatever he's probably somewhere in the top seven whatever you want to look at troy aikman's analysis he's uh he's in command of the second best offense in the nfl like dak prescott is definitely if you say yes or no should we pay this guy it's a yes right yeah that's it so so i'm not even saying that oh they should have hesitation or second thoughts i'm just saying i'd like to see him go into a hostile environment or even have a good team come to dallas and have a really really great performance and i guess he kind of had it against the vikings and their play calling fell apart there but i don't know it just felt like there were some plays that that could have been had and it just never happened i at the very minimum i would like to see my quarterback not get his ass kicked by random people in panama city yes that to me is one of those things where it's like uh you can't defend yourself in the bro capital of spring break after a couple jello shots how are you going to be able to go out there at foxborough in the wind in the rain with the smudgy cameras that we somehow still can't figure out how to get water off of camera lenses in the year 2019 gopros we should make that go reviral again which ones yeah the dak press remember when we did that oh yeah last year just every yeah every spring break we should just do it and then he gets comments about it um no dak is one of those quarterbacks, though, because we do this with a lot of – there's guys who win Super Bowls, and then there's everyone else.
And for everyone else, it's a pretty black and white, either you're a Dak Prescott guy or you're not. And you don't really – there's no nuance in there.
I like Dak Prescott a lot. I think he's a very good quarterback.
I think he's a guy you've got to give money to. I just don't – I can't remember the last time he won a big, big game.
We have to come up with levels, our own names of the different levels for quarterbacks because I think where he's at right now is the best good quarterback. He is – you know what he is? He is right now taking over the seat that Matthew Stafford is leaving vacant.
Like a guy who is a good quarterback, sometimes very good quarterback, tons of talent, can win you games by himself, but you still haven't seen him have that big, big moment. The thing about Dak, though, is I don't think that Dak loses too many games for you.
Yeah, that's true. Because he always can blame Jason Garrett.
Well, he also has a lot better talent than the Lions. But yes.
Yeah, I just, I don't know. It's just an interesting thing I've been thinking about a lot with Dak because I think he has been phenomenal this year.
But then I went back and looked. And I was like, damn, remember when they started 3-0? We're like, the Cowboys are the best team in the NFC.
He's the best's the best beat no one he's the best good quarterback it's occasionally peaking at like the worst great quarterback right right he is in my I always had the tears of suck it's just you have quarterbacks can win you a Super Bowl and everyone else sucks he's the best sucky right now but that doesn't feel right no because he's better than that yeah he's better than my point he's better than suck right that's actually that's the level that he's at right now. Right.
Okay, so he's the suckiest quarterback that doesn't suck. Right.
Got it. I think so.
Uh-huh. Yeah.
And also, he's better than Carson Wentz. Yes.
Right now? At this point, yeah. At this point.
I would rather have Dak Prescott. Okay.
So that is, those are, I guess the Patriots. Here's what Dak Prescott does.
He has the ability to make Skip Bayless look sane at times and skips blind allegiance to Dak. Right.
Occasionally, one out of every three games, I'm like, Skip Bayless knew something I don't know. He'll do something.
You're like, man, this guy, when he gets, he'll be running well or play action, hitting guys on the run, and you're like, damn, this guy's awesome. And then he'll play a game like today where he wasn't the reason the Cowboys lost, but I think he could have been the reason the Cowboys won.
There it is. I finally got to it.
He could have won that game for the Cowboys if he had elevated his game an extra spot. Skip Bayless isn't going to be throwing his jersey into the trash this week.
Right. But he might put it in the penis height microwave for just like a couple seconds.
There it is. Just to let it know.
Yes. You're not above this.
The Cowboys defense played well enough to have Dak Prescott win that game for him. And then the Patriots are just going to keep winning games ugly.
And I don't think anyone, I mean, I know no one on the Patriots cares, this is just their M.O. They just kind of beat up teams with their defense, which is all time, and their offense, I don't think their offense is ever going to click.
I don't think, because they just don't have Antonio Brown's coming back. Nikhil Harry looks good, but they don't have those difference makers like a Gronk or an Antonio Brown or a Josh Gordon when he's healthy kind of guy.
I'm going to play Hank's role real quick and do your pod. Well, they don't need to, Big Cat.
They like winning ugly right now, and they're winning in a way that is utterly demoralizing for anyone that's trying to play them. And if you look at their offense, yeah, they don't have a big play wide receiver, but they've got Julian Edelman, future Hall of Famer, that's proven that he's the best wide receiver in the history of the NFL in the playoffs.
Well, and you forgot one thing. There's still a 50% chance that Antonio Brown and Rob Gronkowski come back.
Together. Together.
Also, Nikhil Harry might be a better wide receiver than Josh Gordon or Antonio Brown ever was. True.
If you saw that catch today. Did you see Gottlieb? Oh, my God.
I got to pull up this Gottlieb. I can tell you that I did not.
What would you? Oh, it was a good guy. We need to start treating Gottlieb like we do Rick Riley because he does drop Gottlieb sometimes.
They're like, that's a Gottlieb. Like that was a good.
Which steals tweets. That's a true guy.
That's a that's a true. OK.
He wrote when Nikhil Harry dropped a ball, he wrote, can't drop that. Okay.
That's gotley. Yeah, that's good.
That's how he spells his name. Holy shit.
And it had zero retweets. Yikes.
Still? Still. To this day.
Eight hours ago. How many likes? 24 likes.
He has 264,000 followers. Jesus.
How hard that is to do a tweet with that many followers? You would have to try. I don't think I could.
I don't think either of us could. What was the one that he had the other week? It was like he took out some letters because there was no D.
Oh, yeah. That was, fuck.
It was really good. Yeah, there was no D.
I can't remember. I have.
I don't know. There was no D.
It was so good. And I was like, uh, that's, this is a really good tweet.
Doug. Oh, it's Portland.
Oh yeah. Yeah.
Portland trailblazers. He's so bad at Twitter.
Oh fuck. Um, yeah.
Someone replied. And then it's just, it's kind of sucked to be him because like every time you tweet, someone just replied, can't, steal, credit, cards.
That's for, yeah, that's for good. Never forget, never forget.
No, no. Never forgive, never forget.
Okay, so let's go. Let's move on to who's back.
Pitha, you got one more ad? Yeah, I do. All right, do it.
It's an ad for a very good forensic. We're going to get right back to the show.
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Who's back of the week? Liam, would you like to start?

Kick us off.

Yes, I would.

My who's back of the week are random people from your high school

that you don't want to see.

Big time.

There you go.

Wednesday night, Thanksgiving Eve, or Blackout Wednesday, people call it.

Blackout Wednesday.

Blackout Wednesday.

Will you be partaking in Black Wednesday?

No, I'm going to be here. Oh.
I mean, I'll probably do something, but not with Blackout Wednesday. Blackout Wednesday.
Will you be partaking in Black Wednesday? No, I'm going to be here. Oh.
I mean, I'll probably do something, but not with blackout. You can still blackout even if you're not with high school friends.
Yeah. Just blackout.
Yeah. I've never understood why that's the big drinking night instead of Friday.
I always feel like Friday is the better night to go out because you don't have to worry about being hungover at Thanksgiving. I think you can be hung over on thanksgiving the only like two things you don't need to do or get a dui or end up on the barstool instagram page probably yeah yeah yeah it also if you avoid that then you're good it's an age thing i don't think you can be hung over like in your 30s now then it's like okay everyone's sitting watching you at thanksgiving like what's going on yeah is there an issue here get your act together right whereas like when it's like it's like almost cute and funny when you're in your 20s yeah it's like oh that's so funny when i was 29 the night before thanksgiving i broke a toilet there you go that was pretty cool and you weren't even drunk but no it was like that's great like classic pft breaking a toilet going out with a bang he's so young and crazy and now that i'm in my 30s if if I break a toilet, it's like we have a problem.
Yeah, we have to talk about this. Well, mostly because it would be your second toilet break.
Yeah, then at that point, it's a pattern. Yeah, right.
All right, PFT, what do you got? Oh, you got another one? Oh, well, you have two. Did you see the pants video? I was going to say pants.
Incredible. Yeah, incredible.
He puts on one leg and then a shoe and then the other leg and then the shoe yeah clearly somebody who does not put pants he has not i mean he hasn't put pants on in in 18 years you're out of practice for 18 years or anything you're not gonna remember how to do it he's gotta feel so weird tonight like he's having pants on you think he goes to sleep in the pants i don't know but no i bet you he rips him off he has a chance. He probably does.
There's probably a small part of him that's kind of upset that they won. Yeah.
That's what I was saying to him. It's like when you live the life of luxury wearing shorts all the time for 19 years, then you have to go back.
And everyone knows you as the shorts guy. Yeah.
You're like a little bit. That like little level of fame, just kind of like very small community-based fame is kind of a cool thing to have yeah but he feels like you know when they make twice fruit wear like a long sleeve shirts yes that's that's exactly right what if his legs develop an allergy to pants like that hockey goalie had a couple years ago yeah pads or just breaks out hosa yeah breaks out in a rash on his shins.
Not good. All right, who's your who's back, PFT?

My who's back of the week is the NCAA. Why? The NCAA is back big time.
So Wiseman, they're going to let him play. Yep.
They're allowing him back at Memphis. But he has to pay $1,400 in fines to the NCAA.
Okay is just, I applaud the NCAA for figuring out a way to fine your players who aren't allowed to be making money

and expect them to pay you to come back and play.

It's next-level supervillainry, so congratulations for innovation.

The NCAA is terrible, and we agree on that,

but it is funny when everyone's like, you finding a guy who who gets paid nothing i'm pretty sure james weisman's got paid they figured they figured that out he's making money but it's also he should be making money above board and he should be making a lot more money he should be making market value but james weisman's making money it should um it actually might be a trap if i'm advising Wiseman like if you if you're able to pay a $1,400 fine back to the NCAA they might just suspend you and be like how are you able to afford to pay this right well and then Jay Williams in classic fucking Duke fashion he's doing like a GoFundMe so then he's gonna donate it to James Wiseman and get Memphis like you going to get the death penalty. Oh, so he's trying to eliminate because he thinks that Memphis could potentially beat Duke later on.
Trying to get rid of their best player. Right.
Right. Okay.
Right. Is this a recruiting violation in some way? Hopefully.
For Duke? Hopefully. Yeah.
Well, it won't matter. Coach K will just pay off the fucking NCAA.
We should just start fighting. He always does.
Is the NCAA even allowed to fine people? I never remember this being part of their MO before just now. Yeah, I don't know.
I feel like if you issue a fine to somebody with enough confidence and just hope that they pay you, you probably get it right once every two or three times. Well, basically, through this entire process of paying players and all this discussion about what the NCAA does, it's essentially come down to the fact that the NCAA just is that guy in your friend group who organizes shit.
Uh-huh. And no one wants to be the guy who organizes shit.
So they're like, what does the NCAA do? Well, they kind of organize, you know, like the schedules and all that stuff. They made reservations after different places.
And places and you know like everyone has to play each other and then they like they get the gym time they get the ice time it's like well yeah actually you know what i don't really want to do that you know what memphis should do memphis should just pay the head of the ncaa by allowing him to attend a freshman philosophy course yeah that's probably worth probably worth about $1,500. Yes, right there.
Right? Yeah, you get to take the intro to Earth Sciences. Yeah.
And sit in a classroom with 500 people. Sneaky hard class.
Earth Sciences? Yeah, I remember that was hard. I think dinosaurs is another class I took.
It was very hard. Human anthropology was a tricky one for me.
Actually, you know what? I was in this one class that i got a d minus in but it was the class that i probably uh am the most proud of i learned how to read ekg results and i i was allowed into the class by mistake and so it was like a 400 level biology class where i was basically taking this course alongside doctors yeah and i had to teach myself like teach myself what the human heart was made out of. And I ended up passing it by the skin of my teeth, but somehow I got out of it.
That's a sick flex. Yeah, it's a sick flex.
You're a doctor. Right now, if I- You just basically told a totally inconsequential story to say you're a doctor.
Yeah, if I read your EKG results right now, I could tell you how big the different chambers of your heart were. Yeah, you'd be like,.
That is, you do eat too much chili. That's the way the prognosis would be.
Do you have any other who's back? Yeah, my other who's back of the week is weed. Yeah.
So Arizona State versus Oregon on Saturday night. Was awesome.
Was an awesome game. The ref got on the mic and he said, please reset the game clock to four minutes and 20 seconds.

And the crowd went nuts.

The Arizona State students went nuts.

And probably Arizona State and Oregon, I would guess, smoked the most weed.

No, Arizona State's ecstasy.

As a combined.

They're a big old big molly.

But when you come down.

It's true.

Yeah.

How would you know?

I don't know.

I don't know.

That is awesome.

That's an awesome moment. Pac-12 after's right that game was was very fun to watch um all right my who's back of the week i got two uh feast week just feast week in general and all the sports this is when your eyes bleed because you just watch college basketball all day and then football that when thursday starts and you have football day thanksgiving and then that fr Friday is one of the sneaky favorite days because it has the start of rivalry week and you have random games at like noon on a Friday is that the Egg Bowl the Egg Bowl is played Thursday night okay like Nebraska Iowa is always Friday which is awesome to watch I think Virginia Virginia Tech like random games I love watching on that Friday and then you have a full then you still have a full college football weekend in front of you.
So there's nothing better. And then – Oh, it's also – rivalry week means the reintroduction of prank wars between two schools that have played each other every year.
Yes. Yes.
And then the other who's back is people getting really mad about regional foods on Twitter. This is a big week for that.
For Thanksgiving? Yeah, just like food takes in general get very annoying around Thanksgiving time. Someone's going to do the cranberry sauce debate.
Someone's going to do the stuffing is actually overrated debate. It's actually called dressing.
I've heard the pumpkin pie stuff. I've heard the like, oh, do you have ham? Or people do that.
It just sucks. The whole thing sucks.
It turns out you probably eat something different than someone else in a different part of the country or has a different ethnic background than you. Crazy.
But you know what? We can all come together and agree that eating a shitload of food is good. It's really good.
That's the thing. So just whatever food you like growing up in whatever region you grow up in just make sure to eat three times the normal amount of it and then you know what you get a stomach ache no matter what part of the country you're from if you get too full and that's the greatest part of the year point out the guy who's gonna be like oh yeah actually the like my the green bean casserole is my favorite or like oh i put marshmallows in this like you know how everyone just does this for the entire week just stop we've done this debate a billion times i will say don't go around putting raisins and shit that raisins don't need to be no don't do that don't do that no no you don't do that do you put raisins and shit i don't care you put raisins in your food i don't give a fuck yeah all right you did do that i don't do that i triggered you i'm so that uh that viral tweet that's like going around like controversial food take.
Oh! Look at the replies to that. Some of them are like absolutely hilarious where it's like people being dead serious.
Like a guy said St. Louis has the best Chinese food in the world.
Fact. Like shit like that.
A guy was like I like ranch on my steak instead of barbecue sauce. So Twitter – Buy Hank doing that.
Yo, definitely. Twitter by nature, like there will always be an underlying food debate that's like simmering on Twitter.
But there are certain times where food debates take over your entire timeline. You're like, this sucks.
That happens right now. It's like when Die Hard for Christmas.
I was going to say, shut up. That's next on the list.
Goleix, don't do it. Gullix and Troy Wingo, we like you, Gullix.
We're a Gullix family. Don't do it.
But yeah, when these stupid, annoying debates take over the entire timeline, you're like, stop, shut up. You know what another big one is? Eggnog, good or bad.
Yep, yep. Why do we do this every year? You like it or you don't.
So I like the simmering food debates where it's like you can actively ignore the food debates going on Twitter. When it gets to a point like this week where we are forced to read them all, that's when it sucks.
Okay. Oh, turduckens are back too.
Yes. Turduckens are back big time.
We should do a big turducken. And just have the center of it be a Devlin Hodges jersey.
We should have Hank fry a turkey when it's frozen and blow himself up. Indoors.
Just do all the steps. He's not going to listen to this, so he won't even know.
Uh-huh. We should do that.
You know who the real turkey is? Obama. Obama.
Bummer. All right.
SeatGeek question. PFT.
Promo code TAKE. $10 to SeatGeek.
My SeatGeek question is. I can get six Redskins tickets for that.
Six Redskins tickets. Damn.
You can buy enough to do a whole protest. Yeah.
Can you kidnap enough people against their will to take them to a Redskins game for free? This is why the media is broken. SeatGeek question.
Promo code TAKE. $10 off.
Do you want to do Football Guy of the Week? Yeah, let's do Football to do football guy of the week yeah let's do football football guy of the week that was a good question uh we're at the we're at american ninja warrior time by the way american ninja warrior is on it's 140 at night what's the name of the guy it's like andy weed yeah like kelly weed or something yeah it's the crossfit Wolf. These guys, and it's also, the weird part is it's like old American Ninja Warrior.
This clearly was filmed like four or five years ago. Yeah.
Who cares? Once one person. You know what these guys are? These guys are the Bengals fan that is living on his roof to get away from his wife.
They're that exact guy,

except they construct an obstacle course

in their backyard that they spend nine hours

on from sunup to sundown

to get away from their family. And the best part about

American Ninja Warrior, these guys are

great athletes, but

they should, you know how there's this

wall I think they have to climb, the big wall to finish?

Yeah. It shouldn't be a wall, it should just

be someone standing there with a baseball

and throws it to them and see if they can catch it.

I guarantee you they can't.

None of those guys can triple the basketball.

No.

No, that should be the final challenge.

Like, here, catch this football.

That's it.

And then they all drop it.

Wouldn't that be hilarious?

If they all, like, climb these huge walls, do this obstacle course,

swim through this thing, go through this net,

and then you just throw him a full five-yard out and he can't catch it?

Yeah, their bodies are idiot savants.

Like Einstein couldn't tie his shoes.

No, Einstein.

They could build a nuclear bomb.

He married his cousin.

Which is way cooler.

Two, smartest guy in the world, married his cousin.

People don't talk about that enough.

Did you know that?

Mm-hmm.

Yeah.

That's fucked up.

So did FDR.

Marrying your cousins.

Wow.

When you see a hot piece of ass like Eleanor.

Like Eleanor.

Yeah.

The late 30s.

Very handsome woman.

I think we, as a society, had a moment for marrying cousins.

Yeah.

Is marrying cousins having a moment?

I don't know.

It is.

It's my pantheon.

We're officially high at the end of the show.

Is that in your pantheon of incest? Okay. Raiders football guy of the week.
Let's get this back together on track. Raiders head coach John Gruden for calling ref a fucking cock sucking motherfucker.
He did that. And he did it in the Meadowlands inspired by Tony Soprano.
Yes. That's when you kind of wish you put the play calling sheet in front

of your face. No, I like it better this way.

No, I'm saying John Gruden. Actually, he doesn't give a shit.

He's on a sinking ship. Literally said

I'm on a sinking ship.

Michael Irvin for getting

very spiritual when breaking down Cowboys

Patriots. So what did he say?

I think he said something along the lines of

Goliath wasn't sent to

defeat David. He was sent to make David believe that he could beat Goliath.
I don't know. It was one of the more coherent things that Michael Irvin has said on the air.
He didn't howl like a dog in the middle of his explanation. Is he sweating? I feel like, oh, of course.
I think we've talked about this, but Michael Irvin, Super Bowl week. Miami, Florida.
I mean, he is like the mayor of Miami. It's going to be – shout out Miami, by the way.
Danny Boykane, that's the worst loss ever to FIU. FIU.
His 20-point favorites. Ned's revenge.
Butch Davis' revenge game. Crazy.
All right. Injured Youngstown State quarterback Nathan Mays for taking one last nap of his career despite being out for the season.
I watched this video. Did you watch this video? I did not see this one.
What did he injure? Because he, like, couldn't even put weight on it. It looked like he just had gotten injured.
Did they not? Oh, yeah. So they're carrying him out into the field.
His left leg is dangling. Right.
I think his leg died. Uh-huh.
Either that or they don't have... Is he waiting in line for surgery? It seems somewhat concerning that he's not able to put any weight on him.
But he also doesn't have any sort of medical device on his leg, like a brace or a cast or anything. Right.
He's just kind of hanging out, dealing with an injury like a deer in the wild might if they tore their ACL. So you thought that was weird, right? Yeah, it is kind of strange.
It looks a little weird. It looks like if you dropped Nathan Mays, and I'm sure he's a nice guy, and shout out Coach Bowe, but if you dropped Nathan Mays on the ground, he'd still be laying on the field.
And he would never be able to get up or home or anything. And he took a knee.
That was the play. They let him take a knee as they were beating Illinois State.
It would be sick if he threw it. I was actually.
The Redskins should draft him and just have him be their victory formation guy. Can I say something? Yeah.
Because it is American Ninja Warrior hour. I was like, there was a 1% part of me that was hoping that they would Shiano this guy and just fucking do a full rush.

It might actually improve his leg.

It would have been so funny.

Like, if you're just a pissed off kid, who are they playing?

They're playing Illinois State.

Yeah, if you're just a, you know, roll birds and you're just like,

fuck this, man, I don't want to lose my last game

because it's everyone else's last game too.

That's true. I'm just going to blow up the line here.
have fumble you have your one chance to get on sports center and be the discussion of the week yeah damn just one time um all right uh last texas head coach tom herman for pumping his players up by headbutting them without a helmet and then they lost by like a billion that's fine he. He was getting the boys going.
That sucks. That clip has gone all around.
Listen, Texas is back to being not back officially, I think we can say, right? Tom Herman, I guess good. Is he still kissing players? I think so.
I don't know. I think he channeled all his weird sexual energy into designing that uterus-shaped thing that's going to be in the Texas stadium.
Oh, yeah. That's very weird.
Yeah. Very, very weird.
So, yeah, Texas is not back and might be looking for a new coach. Probably not.
Ish. Maybe.
It depends. It depends on how drunk the boosters that matter are.
True. Yeah.
True. It's like at any given time, if there's like one poker game that goes bad in Texas, you can just end up with a pissed-off booster ready to make a buyout.

Well, good news is the Cowboys covered today.

So, Tom Herman, you have a job for another week.

That's true, yeah.

All right, last thing.

Actually, no, it's probably worse that the boosters made money betting on the Cowboys.

Oh, yeah, you're right.

So now they're feeling frisky with the buyout checks.

Yeah.

You need to hope and pray that other Texas teams don't cover the spread. Yes, that's true.
Okay, last up, I just wanted to mention one thing, not to brag what we called it, but Elon Musk is just a front for Jeff Bezos because his Cybertruck was one of the funniest things I've ever seen. Yeah, the black wheels.
That doesn't have...

The angular thing.

They threw that rock at it, and it went through.

I don't...

Yeah.

But he was just like, pretty good.

Yeah, he's like, well...

Oh, no, actually, it didn't go through.

It just shattered the...

He's like, yeah, we have this state-of-the-art,

you know, bulletproof glass,

and they threw a little rock at it,

and it just shattered it.

Is that truck meant for Mars,

or is that supposed to be used here on planet Earth?

I think it's here.

I think it's the... Elon Musk just sells shit we don't need remember he sold all those fucking blow torches he's got a a interesting business model with this thing though which is if you sell something for a high enough ticket price you only have to sell like two of them right so the world's dumbest rich people and then you end up making a profit and now jeff bezos is getting a pass again i don't know if that's true but he when people talk about elon musk doing stupid shit they forget about jeff bezos that's true that's true he's a brilliant describe what is the cyber part of this truck i does the truck i think it has wi-fi the truck has wi-fi it's just like it's just like if you put blockchain in front of anything then it becomes bitcoin related bro.
Bro, you can... The Cybertruck.
You can hook that shit up to your Spotify. It shows you on your navigation system where all the horny local singles are.
Yeah. It's so sick.
Cybertruck. Who doesn't need a Cybertruck? I hope that goes like...
I hope we go backwards in... Well, we kind of are, but get back to the Hummer days.
Remember when the H2s just no the the og hummers yeah the og hummers then but then the h2 was like well this one isn't that bad for the environment he should put flame throwers on the side of his cyber truck yeah and just cyber truck it up like tacks fall out of the cyber truck i bet that thing doesn't even have a bitchin sound system i bet you just got some just normal quality subwoofers in there. Oh, knowing Elon Musk, he probably built the whole Cybertruck and then, like, didn't put any cup holders in.
And then you sit down and you're like, wait, where the fuck do I put my coffee? It comes with, like, the iTunes or the iPhone that had U2 on it. Yeah.
It comes preloaded with all of Grimes' albums. It's just like a big scam to make his girlfriend more money.
Oh, man.

All right.

That's our show.

We'll see everyone Wednesday.

Reminder, we're not going to have a show on Friday, but we're going to do an extra long Wednesday.

Probably do two interviews and throw in a preview for the whole weekend so that anyone who has to work on Friday morning has something extra to listen to.

But, yeah, we'll see everyone on Wednesday.

Love you guys. Thank you.