NFL Week 11, Matt Nagy Is A Doofus, Lamar Is Absurd And We Rank Weird Fans

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Speaker 1 On today's part of my take, we have football. You know it.
It's Monday. We have a full recap of week 11.
I'm mad about the Bears. We have Lamar Jackson being the front runner for the MVP.

Speaker 1 We have the Patriots winning the rematch of the Super Bowl, the rubber match of the Super Bowl. A lot of football to get to.

Speaker 1 Football guy of the week, a Monday reading, who's back, a packed Monday show for you.

Speaker 1 But before we do all that, part of my take is brought to you by the when cool creamy ranch meets tangy bold buffalo, the whole is greater than the sum of its sauce.

Speaker 1 Say howdy, partner, to new Buffalo Ranch sauce only at McDonald's for a limited time at participating McDonald's. Okay, let's go.

Speaker 1 violence.

Speaker 1 And then I love the sound of work to be done.

Speaker 1 No place to hang out or washing.

Speaker 1 And then I can't blame all of the sun. Oh, no, we're gonna rock it down to Elay Trick Avenue.

Speaker 1 And then we take it higher.

Speaker 1 Oh, we're gonna rock it down to Elay Trick Avenue. Part of my cake.
Presented by Barbara.

Speaker 1 Welcome to Part of My Pink, presented by the Cash App. It is Bad Beats Monday.
Hashtag Bad Beats Monday. Tweet that at Cash App.
Tweet that at us.

Speaker 1 They will hook up some of you that got screwed this weekend. Today is Monday,

Speaker 1 November 18th,

Speaker 1 week 11.

Speaker 1 What?

Speaker 1 What? Is there an echo in here?

Speaker 1 What?

Speaker 1 We start in Baltimore as Jackson was remarkable facing off against his contemporary, Deshaun of the Dead Watson, who looked like a zombie all Sunday afternoon.

Speaker 1 Daisy Duke Johnson got cut off and showed his ass as the Texans' offense couldn't get moving.

Speaker 1 On the other side, the Ravens rode the Gus bus for 112 yards and a score, and DeAndre the Giant Hopkins came up small as the Texans scored seven points, or the amount of beers one would drink in a 20-minute cab ride.

Speaker 1 Verbal gift boom. DeAndre the Giant.
No, no, no, please stop. No, no, no, no, not another quarterback.
No, no, no. Ravens 41, Texans 7.
Whoop, whip, whip!

Speaker 1 And Charlotte, where quarterback Ryan played his first game of the season on Matt Rale Surface.

Speaker 1 Kyle Woody Allen acted inappropriately and put out a film that's only funny because it's so uncomfortable.

Speaker 1 Kenyon Barack O'Barner reached across the aisle and took it all the way to the house as the Panthers often stalled and crashed faster than healthcare.gov.

Speaker 1 As my good friend Charlie Sheen would say, Quinning. Damn, that is, as the Falcons coach earns himself talk of an extension.
Falcons 29, the Panthers 3.

Speaker 1 In Ral John, where the Redskins, who had gone 3.5 Scaramucci's without scoring a touchdown, matched up against the Red Hot Jets.

Speaker 1 Sam Donald Palmer said when Lifehand You Lemons turned it into half lemonade, half iced tea, and tell everyone we're going to run the damn table.

Speaker 1 Darius Red Beans and Geist Zattoran into the end zone, but it wasn't enough for the hapless Redskins as Sam Donald Swaltonega team kept calming and calming and calming and calming.

Speaker 1 And Dwayne Haskins Robbins was feeling 31 flavors of pressure with six sacks and 10 QB hits. Don't look now, but the Jets are on a winning streak.
34, 17.

Speaker 1 What? Some spread. In Minnesota, where Kirk Cousins completes a historic 20-point combat, you fight that.

Speaker 1 Dalvin Cookie Monster got the fourth quarter going by saying, Mister touchdown, we want comeback. And Kyle Mason Rudolph avoided getting smashed on the head as he had to go ahead score.

Speaker 1 After the Broncos' fourth loss of the season, where they lead in the fourth quarter, Vic Fangiolina Jolie said, this is the pits. Vikings 27, Broncos 24.

Speaker 3 A word of warning, some of the pictures in this story might be tough to look at.

Speaker 3 Police are offering up to $38,000 as a reward for help in finding the person responsible for stabbing a dolphin to death.

Speaker 1 No one circles the wagons like the Buffalo Bills. Bills

Speaker 1 37, 23,

Speaker 1 43. You're absolutely right, Boom.
In Detroit, where the Lions and Cowboys met in a can't lose.

Speaker 1 And as so often happens in these movies, as seen on Disney Plus, available now on smart TVs nationwide, a lion named Scarborough looked like he was going to be king for a day.

Speaker 1 Tony Pollard Greens and Randall Corn on the Cobb were quality side dishes to the main course. An extra large serving of baby Dak ribs.
Who's the best QB in the NFC?

Speaker 1 Maybe Dak, baby Dak, baby Dak, baby Dak. And much like the wildebeest who killed Mufasa too soon, boom.
Streaming now on Disney Plus, did I mention Disney Plus?

Speaker 1 The Cowboys have Michael gallop their way back into the lead in the NFC East. Cowboys 35, the Lions 27.

Speaker 1 What?

Speaker 1 What?

Speaker 1 Whoop, whoop, what?

Speaker 1 Standing on a corner, Jameis Winson, Tampa, Florida. Such a fine sight to see.

Speaker 1 It's an ugly scoreboard, 17 to 34. The Bucks have a blind QB.

Speaker 1 What are these passes?

Speaker 1 You need some glasses.

Speaker 1 The Saints go marching through breeze. Just take your of

Speaker 1 Saints 34.

Speaker 1 I didn't write down all the scores. It's San Francisco, where Christian Kirk Herbstreet and the Cardinals offense weren't flying high on their private jet Sunday.

Speaker 1 The Niners were without the Pro Bowl tight end Greg Kittle for the second straight game as they're practicing Jimmy Garapa load management.

Speaker 1 But in his absence, the Niners were able to slide a couple balls into their backup, very tight end, Ross K.Y. Dwelly.
I love the his and hers boom.

Speaker 1 Pray for anyone who had the Cardinals plus 10 as the last play. Had a whoop, and a whoop, and a

Speaker 1 and a whoop, and a fumble.

Speaker 1 But, Cardinals fans, don't worry.

Speaker 1 Be happy.

Speaker 1 Don't worry.

Speaker 1 Be happy now. Your future is in good hands with Kyler Murray, even if your fuckboy coach can't win a game.
49ers 36, Cardinals 26. Whoop! Fumble!

Speaker 1 We finish in Philadelphia, Philadelphia, where an old Wiley vet from the Bay Area throws his first touchdown pass in the regular season.

Speaker 1 That's right, Julian Edelman made the Eagles' defense look like they had popcorn lung with his third quarter touchdown pass. Benjamin Button Watson looks younger the older he gets.

Speaker 1 And speaking of old young guys, Tom Brady, still out there doing it. I remember young Swamp and even younger Tom Rat the catch.
Yeah, folks, I was there. Look at all that hair.

Speaker 1 Ultimately, the game went through Nelson Monts Aguilar's hands. Ha ha ha!

Speaker 1 And the Eagles fall in the rematch of that Super Bowl. 52, 17, 10.

Speaker 1 There it is. Week 11 in the books.

Speaker 1 Okay. What are we going to talk about? Well, today, big one.
We do always talk about the Sun Entertainment game first.

Speaker 1 I think there are a lot of people out there waiting to hear us talk about the Jets Redskins. I am.
Saggy Soros? Ooh, Sagi Soros.

Speaker 1 So fucking done with Matt Nagy as a football coach. Matt Nagy has done the impossible.
He has made Mitch Trubisky a sympathetic figure. And that happened in L.A.
on Sunday night.

Speaker 1 I would say the impossible would be winning a game with Mitch Trubisky. Well, you know what? Don't do that.
Don't be overly mean. Remember, he's a sympathetic figure.
The Bears season is over.

Speaker 1 I feel like a fool forever thinking they had it in them to win this game, even though the whole game was winnable until the last three minutes, the Bears were like, you know, one big play.

Speaker 1 There was a fumble that could have picked up. There was a pick six that was right there.
There were so many chances for the Bears to like basically,

Speaker 1 what is it, snatch victory from the jaws of defeat or whatever the fuck the saying is. But Matt Nagy, you idiot, you're a coward.

Speaker 1 He throws Mitch Trubisky under the bus with the Phantom hip injury with the last possession of the game, bringing in Chase Daniel. And it is a joke.
He's in over his head.

Speaker 1 he's a clown he's been a clown since he did the 43 yard kicking competition in the spring basically using the moment that was a horrendous moment with the double doink and making sure that the team thought about it every single day his play calling is a joke and now he has done the last thing it is the death spiral i mentioned it on twitter but Mark Tressman did the exact same thing when he was in his death spiral.

Speaker 1 He benched Jay Cutler for Matt Barkley to basically try to say, it's not me, it's the quarterback. And that is what Matt Nagy did tonight.

Speaker 1 And now he looks even worse because he did it in a game that Mitch wasn't even the biggest problem. Like, it was, he's played worse.
He was not good. And I am fully admit that Mitch is not the guy.

Speaker 1 So I'm not going to sit here and be like, oh, Mitch has it somewhere in him. He doesn't.

Speaker 1 This was not the game to bench him. It was like there were other games that he's been way worse.
This was the game where, you know what? Guess what?

Speaker 1 Mitch didn't call a fucking option play to the short yard or short side of the field with your banged up running back on third and one. You did, Matt Nagy.
You did. No, it was a bitch move.

Speaker 1 It was a bitch move by Matt Nagy to do that at the end of the game.

Speaker 1 It was a two-possession game. Yeah.
So actually, credit to Matt Nagy for learning from last Thursday night's game.

Speaker 1 He didn't want to keep his starting quarterback in in a two-score game and have him get hit over the head with a helmet. That's it.
In the fourth quarter.

Speaker 1 So he's learned from the mistakes that the Steelers made. But yeah, it was a bitch move keeping him in there.

Speaker 1 Excuse me. me, it was a bitch move taking him out there and putting Chase Daniel in to get the world's saddest spark.

Speaker 1 They were like, I want a spark, then put literally anyone except for Chase Daniel in. It's also the sparklessest quarterback in the history of the NFL.
The game is over.

Speaker 1 You are basically embarrassing Mitch Trubisky, who, again, he's not the guy. No one is saying that.

Speaker 1 Everyone is watching this, and we all know that something's going to have to change, and the Bears are going to have to bring in quarterbacks.

Speaker 1 But to embarrass him in a game that's basically loss and put in chase daniel who is not listen i know there's some people who are like chase daniel's better than mitch trubiski guess what he's not he's a fine backup he's a perfect backup i'm sure chase daniel

Speaker 1 you know marks every single box when it comes to a backup he's a great locker room guy he's a great teammate he's a great guy in the film room he can probably get you one or two wins here and there It's just,

Speaker 1 if you bench Mitch Trubisky there, it better be for the future.

Speaker 1 And that's not what happened. Chase Daniel's not the future.

Speaker 1 So you just did it so that you can push the blame off and have everyone think that it's not your fault and the whole genius visor thing is not so funny anymore and I'm just so sick of it and I think he's in way over his head and he's dealt with the media poorly all year and it's just a joke.

Speaker 1 The whole thing is a joke. The bear season's officially done.
The thing is a joke and Kleil Mack, whenever you want to show up, that's fine too. You don't bench a quarterback

Speaker 1 at that point though. You just don't do it.
Like there's no, like you said, there's no greater purpose that it's going to serve. You're not going to build on anything by bringing Chase in.

Speaker 1 It's like breaking up with somebody on a plane at that point. You should wait until the plane lands.
Yes. Because otherwise.
The channel is amazing. Yeah.
Their defense is pretty much.

Speaker 1 It does it every single night, though. They do.

Speaker 1 They keep them in the game.

Speaker 1 I know. They keep them in the game.
And then they run out of gas. And that was probably an unfair shot of Klu Mack.
I'm just frustrated because when Hakeem Hicks gets hurt, everyone looks worse.

Speaker 1 And Klu Mack doesn't have the numbers. And I got all the now the new hotness, you know, like

Speaker 1 the verbal meme, looking at

Speaker 1 the new girl.

Speaker 1 The old girl is Deshaun Watson and Patrick Mahomes were drafted after Mitch Trubisky.

Speaker 1 The new one is this kid, Max Crosby, who's from Eastern Michigan, who has more sacks for the Raiders than Khalil Mack does this year. He's getting paid like $30,000 on the year.
So that was a mistake.

Speaker 1 That's the new one. So John Green was actually smart to get rid of his best player.
That's the new hotness that I got to deal with every day.

Speaker 1 That's just people looking for like an opportunity to rub salt in the wood. No, Khalil Mack has not been the same guy as last year, but also it's one of those weird things where you never know

Speaker 1 how much he's impacting a game even without getting sex. The embrace at the end of the game was not great either, where it looked like they were both crying and hugging each other.

Speaker 1 No, he was whispering. He's like, hey, man.
And Matt Nagy was covering up his mouth and his tears using the play card. Yeah, it says BU.

Speaker 1 And Matt Nagy's whispering to Mitch and saying, hey, man, just so you know, I had to bench you to try to keep my job. We're going to say it was a hip injury.

Speaker 1 So if you could just do me a solid and walk off the field with a little bit of a limp, which he didn't

Speaker 1 awesome because I'm going to go to the press conference later and just say that you were hurt and we didn't want to get you further hurt and you're still our quarterback. Okay, sounds good.

Speaker 1 It was a huge event for comparing that embrace to other movies and TV shows, too. Like Hank compared it to Daenerys and John.

Speaker 1 That was a good one. Sick reference.
You could do it for the Godfather. I know it was you.
Yeah,

Speaker 1 you could do it for

Speaker 1 Mice and Min with Lenny and George, and he shoots him in the head at the end of it.

Speaker 1 Old Yeller. It's probably old Yeller.
More old Yeller. Just like take him out back and shoot him.

Speaker 1 It could be Entourage. Hug it out.
Hug it out, bitch. Hug it out, bitch.
That's what we do. Oh, it could be Titanic when Rose is on.

Speaker 1 So Matt Nagy is Rose, and she's on the door, and there's definitely room for Mitch to get on there. But he's like, no, just stay in the water.
Just stay in the water. Yeah.

Speaker 1 That would mean Matt Nagy is the coach of the Bears for like 80 more years. Yeah.
So he'll be around and then he'll get really old and then he'll throw his play card into the bottom of the Atlantic.

Speaker 1 He'll throw his Super Bowl ring that he wins next year with Chase Daniel. Man, I'm so sick of this shit.

Speaker 1 My question is, what does Matt Nege do well? Because we've established that he doesn't call plays well. We've established that he doesn't handle the media well.
Dude, when he, well, he does the,

Speaker 1 he has the BU card. He has

Speaker 1 the visor.

Speaker 1 Very shiny head. NBC did the, which was just salt in the wound.
They're like, look at all these fun plays he ran. Dude, he had it unbelievable.
He had the best defense in the league last year. Okay.

Speaker 1 And

Speaker 1 he was hired to be an offensive guy. And it's just, we're going to get to other games where I'll blame guys who don't do well on their side of the ball.

Speaker 1 So it's only fair to me to say, Matt Nagy, it's your offense, dude. It's your offense.
You know what the funnest play call they had tonight was? Was when they ran a punt? No, well, yes,

Speaker 1 they ran a fake, like they were going to run a play on fourth down, and then they substituted the pump team out and said in the middle of the play. That was the funnest thing.

Speaker 1 When the most creative your offense gets is running a fake, fake punt, you've got some problems. You know what?

Speaker 1 I just realized the only thing that will save Matt Nagie, and actually, no, this won't save him, but this is probably what he was thinking.

Speaker 1 He probably did this at the end of the game so that no one would talk about the fact that Eddie Pinero is a joke. Because Matt Nagy cares way too much about his kicker's psyche.

Speaker 1 So much that it actually damages the kicker's psyche. But Eddie Pinero, you're a joke too.
And Matt Nagy said he's not going to bring in a new kicker because, I mean, why would you?

Speaker 1 He believes in his guy. Yeah, why would you?

Speaker 1 The guy can't fucking hit a in a game that could have been won if they fucking hit kicks I'm just trying to remember what happened exactly because he missed a 47 yard left and then right on the but no but wait on their next drive

Speaker 1 they decided to go for it on fourth and nine instead of kicking another 48 yarder and they showed and then on the next drive yeah they tried a 47 yarder yeah and they missed that so he essentially iced his own kicker for an entire drive correct okay correct he it's the same thing that he did with Mitch he's like I don't have confidence in you we're going for it on fourth and nine with the offense that I don't have confidence in.

Speaker 1 And then the next time around, oh, actually, I'm going to bring the guy who I just shattered his confidence back on the field to kick this. Yeah, and neither offense looked good tonight either.

Speaker 1 The Rams didn't look great. For the start of the game, it was just like punt, punt, fumble, punt, punt, punt, punt, missed field goal, punt.
It was like

Speaker 1 your two biggest hate followers on Instagram, quote tweeting or quote Instagram storing each other's stories that they're each tagged in.

Speaker 1 Have you ever seen that where it becomes just like a mirror inside of a mirror of the two worst people that you follow? I do. Yeah, it's bad.
Okay.

Speaker 1 Have you dealt? Did you deal with some of that? I've seen that a few times. Yeah.
I've seen that a few times. Yeah, it was a bad.
I mean, it was exactly kind of how I thought it was going to go.

Speaker 1 I thought it was going to be an under where it was just shit, just garbage. Both offensive lines kind of stink.
Both defenses are good.

Speaker 1 Let's finish here. The bear season is officially over.
The Thanksgiving game is going to be the saddest game ever in Detroit. Jeff Driscoll versus Chase Daniel, possibly.

Speaker 1 Sorry in advance to America that you have to actually like, because the Thanksgiving game is football on Thanksgiving is supposed to give you something to talk about so you don't have to talk to your family.

Speaker 1 When Chase Daniel and Jeff Driscoll face off in Detroit,

Speaker 1 you're going to just have to talk about like whether you're going to get pregnant in the next year or whether you're thinking about going back to law school. Uh-huh.
Oh, solid nose for that. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Right. Or, oh, that girl that you've been bringing around.
Why haven't you popped the question? All those things are going to be on the table when Jeff Driscoll and Chase Daniel face off.

Speaker 1 So I kind kind of disagree with you on that one because to me, when I think Thanksgiving football, I think just disaster Lions teams.

Speaker 1 That is like a nice familiar bit of nostalgia for me. It's like parking my ass on the couch and watching the Lions score six points.
That's Thanksgiving, baby. But here's the thing.

Speaker 1 When you're watching Thanksgiving football and family members come around, if they can sense it's actually a meaningful game, they kind of leave you alone or they'll try to get in on the game.

Speaker 1 When they can see that it's just garbage, that's when it's like, okay, well, there's no point for you to be watching this. That's you should talk to me.

Speaker 1 So, as an NFC North person, you probably kind of dealt with that more than I did.

Speaker 1 In my mind, the Lions game is background noise while I'm frying the turkey, while I'm like helping with the mashed potatoes or whatever. It's nice to have football on in the background.

Speaker 1 You watch the fat guy in the pilgrim suit fall asleep in Detroit. Yeah, so I know that it's about time for me to start focusing on football once they bring out the turducken.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 Once that makes its appearance, then I'm like,

Speaker 1 Yeah, now I got got to turn the volume up all right so we'll finish here the bears season is completely done they need a new quarterback and i think they need a new coach and the whole thing has become a complete disaster basically the worst possible scenario but in a weird way ultimately the most bears thing possible because if you look at the bears history it is marked by by little blips of success followed by back down to the toilet like that's what the chicago bears are so i'm not surprised even though it sucks and I can't believe this team has bought him out so fast, but I'm not surprised.

Speaker 1 Jeff Fisher.

Speaker 1 What? Why not? No, he's going to be a coach at Vanderbilt. Ooh.
Yeah. Oh, that's breaking moves.
Well, we're going to start that run. Okay, yeah.
Okay. Well, consider it started right now.

Speaker 1 Urban, would you take Urban? Urban Meyer?

Speaker 1 No, I have morals. Oh.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 But? Yeah, no, I'd be. Yeah, you can absolutely take it.
Fuck you.

Speaker 1 How mad do you think Ryan Pace was when he was up in that glass cage of emotion at the end of the game and he was just like staring down? He kind of looks like Mitch, too.

Speaker 1 I mean, every time I see him, I feel that it's like Mitch's uncle, nothing. And he drives a Camry, 1997.

Speaker 1 I mean, Ryan Pace. Do you ever wish that maybe Mitch, like, just wish he had driven a slightly better car? Yeah.
Yes. Everything would have been different.

Speaker 1 Everything could have been different if he had like

Speaker 1 an Avalon. If Mitch Trubisky drove a Toyota Avalon, then Nagy would be like, that's the upscale model.
That's pretty sweet. That's too flashy for me.

Speaker 1 Ryan Pace isn't absolved here either because people forget Ryan Pace's whole solution before he drafted Mitch Trubisky, the guy he fell in love with, was Mike Glennon and giving him a bunch of money.

Speaker 1 So let's not pretend that Ryan Pace is like completely free of guilt. No, but wouldn't Ryan Pace, so he's looking down at his coach benching Mitch Trubisky in the fourth quarter.
His love of his life.

Speaker 1 Yeah, to him, that's like Nagy is trying to be the last one alive on that life draft.

Speaker 1 He's made the call to kill. Oh, it's Survivor.
Yeah, he's Survivor. He's made the call to kill Pace in his sleep

Speaker 1 and go ahead and take that competition out of it because that is they had like the biggest ruse going.

Speaker 1 As long as Mitch was still starting, there was still hope for Mitch, then the draft pick was not a bust yet. Correct.
And Pace could save his ass.

Speaker 1 This is what dysfunctional teams do: they have people who all have to go at each other to try to save each other's jobs, save their own job.

Speaker 1 And instead of working together, they're trying to just save their own job, and it all just falls apart. But that's all right.
I'm done with that. Let's move on.
Let's have some fun.

Speaker 1 Week 11 was, it sucks that this was a Sunday night game. Well, we need to do fucking national televised disasters, is always worse.
I mean, let's just give a shout-out.

Speaker 1 As bad as this was for the Bears, this was a huge night for a guy Blake.

Speaker 1 Blake had probably the best reception of the night. No, seriously, he did.
He got up in the air. His hat was on.

Speaker 1 I don't want to say tight end, but. Yeah, you got a good camera on him.
He looks good. He looked really good.
Hands for days.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 1 Let's start. We'll go back in time.
We'll go to Detroit. We just talked about it.
I actually had it written down. This is going to be the saddest Thanksgiving game.
Cowboys, 35, Lions, 20.

Speaker 1 I'm bad with my scores today.

Speaker 1 I think the Lions. Oh, no, they had 27.

Speaker 1 The Cowboys, let's start with the Cowboys. Still don't know who they are because they're 5-1 against losing teams, and this is a team they should have won.

Speaker 1 All I know is that Dak Prescott is very, very good, and silently getting himself into the MVP conversation. He had 444 yards.

Speaker 1 And afterwards, he said he's never had more time in the pocket, which we'll talk about Matt Patricia's defense in a second, but that's not a good sign.

Speaker 1 He's made himself a shitload of money this year so far. And he kept cutting away to Jerry Jones.

Speaker 1 This was an all-time Jerry Jones cutaway game where they'd show him after every single time Dak made a good play. And Jerry, to his credit, I think Jerry wants to pay him.

Speaker 1 Jerry would be delighted to give Dak the biggest contract ever. In fact, that's probably what he hopes happens, even if Dak doesn't deserve the biggest quarterback contract of all time.

Speaker 1 Jerry wants to say, like, with the Dallas Cowboys, we have the most expensive quarterback in in the history of the NFL. He wants to pop out of a cake with a huge check.
Yes, he wants to.

Speaker 1 He'll be like, this is it. We have the number one guy.
Yeah, so he's just excited that Dak is making him less and less and less insane looking when he does decide to cut him that check

Speaker 1 to $250 million. Speaking of quarterbacks, we had on Sunday Jeff Driscoll sign himself to five more years in the NFL.
He has done enough as a backup quarterback.

Speaker 1 He has done exactly what you hope if you're a backup quarterback and your number gets called, you do just enough that forever, for the next five, six, seven years, people will say, Jeff Driscoll, he's a pretty good backup quarterback.

Speaker 1 He's got the Moxie. Yeah, he absolutely has the Moxie.
I forget what the spread was in this game. It was seven.
It was seven, seven. Seven and a half.
So it was a push. No, no, no.

Speaker 1 The Cowboys won by eight. Oh, they went by eight.
Okay, I was going to say, because when you're a backup, you're essentially playing against the spread. Yes.
That's your job, is to just cover.

Speaker 1 And if you can cover, then you are a qualified backup in this league. But he did enough, and Daryl Beville has enough going on offense that now, should we talk about Matt Patricia?

Speaker 1 Can we say things about Matt Patricia? They played scrappy today. Yeah, they were.
They were fighting. Their defense gave up so many yards.

Speaker 1 One of the best offenses. Dak Prescott, again, should I say Dak Prescott said he's never had more time.
They have a great offensive line. They do.
They've got a lot of big boys up front.

Speaker 1 Also, Bo Scarborough, the running back for the Lions, I like him. I think this is his first start.
He's bounced around the league a little bit.

Speaker 1 He's built like a phone booth, and he's just a guy that you don't want to try to tackle. He's got a great name.
Yeah, Bo Scarborough.

Speaker 1 Is he a Michigan guy? He sounds like he should be.

Speaker 1 I'm just going to declare that, no, he went to Michigan. I think he was three.
Matt Stafford. If Matt Stafford starts this game, the Lions probably win.

Speaker 1 What? If Matt Stafford starts this game, the Lions probably win. He was Alabama.
Okay, three-year starter, Michigan. Got it.
Yeah, he's from Tuscaloosa, Alabama. As Alabama as it gets.

Speaker 1 So I have a stat for you then, Hank. Last 26 games for Jim Caldwell, 15-11.
First 26 games for Matt Patricia, 9-16, and 1. So what are you doing?

Speaker 1 I I don't know. What are you doing? He's rebuilding.

Speaker 1 And I probably am too trigger happy when it comes to coaches right now in the state I'm in, and you probably shouldn't switch after two years, but it feels like the defense should be better.

Speaker 1 That's all I'm going to say. I'm not saying Matt Patricia should lose his job.

Speaker 1 I just think I'm speaking for Lions fans right now, and I know Lions fans feel that way, that their defense is not good, and you hired a guy to make the defense good, and the offense has been good enough to win games.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I would be frustrated if I were Patricia, or if I were having to deal with Patricia, but the fact is, they didn't lose this game in a heartbreaking fashion.

Speaker 1 It was just kind of a normal run-of-the-mill loss for the Lions, which is as good as a win for their fan base. It's like, okay, yeah, that sucked.
We're used to this.

Speaker 1 At least they didn't get fucked by the refs. At least they didn't get screwed by like a weird, obscure rule at the very end of some weird chapter that just got written by Mike Pereira.

Speaker 1 They didn't get fucked over by a Hail Mary. So it's like, it's a normal loss for the Lions.
Just go home. Yeah, Randall Cobb, by the way, has turned back the clock.

Speaker 1 He had four catches, 115 yards, and that pisses me off that Randall Cobb is now good again. And the Cowboys, I don't know what to make of the Cowboys.

Speaker 1 I think they have a tough schedule down the stretch.

Speaker 1 And I think even the Eagles losing today, the Eagles probably have the inside track because they have a lot easier of a schedule than the last game. The last Cowboys Eagles game is in Philly.

Speaker 1 But the Cowboys offense, like, they have so many weapons. I'm glad they're so good.

Speaker 1 Their defense can't hang as much. I'm glad that you brought up the Eagles because everything that Dak does, you have to compare to what Carson Wentz does.
Correct. They're always going to be compared.

Speaker 1 And right now, I'd say Dak probably has the leg up on Carson. I would much rather have Dak on my team than Carson Wentz right now.
It doesn't help that Carson Wentz has no

Speaker 1 wide receivers that can stay healthy. Or catch the ball.
Yeah, we'll catch the ball. We'll get there.
Okay. How about Jason Garrett?

Speaker 1 He met with the team this week with the Cowboys and basically apologized to him. So this goes back to the whole Kirk Cousins apology spreading thing.

Speaker 1 He got beat by Kirk Cousins in primetime, and then he had a players-only meeting with Jason Garrett where he just said to all of them, hey guys, I'm sorry. I ruined a lot of stuff for you guys.

Speaker 1 I'm taking responsibility. I ran the ball with Ezekiel Elliott, even though Dak was having the best game ever.

Speaker 1 Yeah, so the key right now, if you want to win in the NFL, is find somebody to say you're sorry to. Yeah, I like that.
I like that. So Jason Garrett still probably going to get fired.

Speaker 1 I feel like unless they win the Super Bowl, and even if they win the Super Bowl, Jerry might fire them. Yep.
And just be like, you know what? It's time for a change.

Speaker 1 Yeah, he likes moving things in and out. It just feels like this is, Jerry's getting itchy.

Speaker 1 You know? Okay. Next up, Jaguars, Colts.

Speaker 1 Let's start with a Trey Wingo tweet that didn't happen, but I know he wanted to.

Speaker 1 How could you bench Uncle Rico for Napoleon Dynamite? Yeah. Trey Wingo definitely wanted to.
He thought about that.

Speaker 1 He thought about tweeting that, but that was Nick Fole's comeback game that was basically one good drive, and then it sucked.

Speaker 1 Jacoby Brissette, it was his comeback game, too. Yes.
So he looks really good. Did you know that his unofficial agent is Bill Parcells? I did.

Speaker 1 Yes, I knew they were like best friends because in like Florida, they met.

Speaker 1 Yeah, so Jacoby Brissette doesn't have an agent because, in his words, he doesn't want anybody else bullshitting on his behalf.

Speaker 1 So he negotiated his whole contract with the Colts by himself with the aid and advisement of Bill Parcells. Yes.
Which is such like a funny conversation to imagine happening.

Speaker 1 Well, especially because Jacoby Brissette probably went to his meeting with like a big cowboy hat and was like,

Speaker 1 let's do some, let's take our belts off and let's negotiate. Uh-huh.
Let's do it.

Speaker 1 Uh, the best play of this game was a play that didn't count, which is Quentin Nelson's one-yard touchdown run that got taken off the board. But the celebration stands forever.

Speaker 1 Yes, he did a keg stand, it took like five people to lift him up in the air. I think it's almost better that it didn't count because it's like it's it stands even more now, it's more memorable, right?

Speaker 1 For sure. And I was just looking at that and thinking, dear God, how many beers do you think Quentin Nelson could drink?

Speaker 1 And once, probably like, probably 70 or 80, a Wade Boggsian amount of beer would be consumed by that man.

Speaker 1 He has like a six-pack. I've never seen someone who is as big and strong as him and has to put on weight to be an offensive lineman and still be as ripped.

Speaker 1 So maybe I would see him just not drinking beer because he's just all he wants to do is pancake people. Yeah, but that's the easiest way to put on weight, though.
True.

Speaker 1 Is just making, just drinking beer and eating literal pancakes. The only downside to having him run the ball is he's not there to block for himself in front of himself.
Right.

Speaker 1 Which is why he didn't get into the end zone. And credit to the Colts for being like, hey, we're just going to run the ball and run the ball and run the ball some more.

Speaker 1 I think they had, was it 250 or 264 rushing yards? Yeah. That's insane.
It is crazy. In like today's NFL, I kind of love it.
The Colts are a throwback team where Jacoby Brissette is good.

Speaker 1 I think they did that because Jacoby Brousette's coming back from his injury and they're like, we don't want to put too much stress on him.

Speaker 1 But it does feel like the Colts can just go and like go hat on hat, man up football when they want to. Yeah, That makes me so happy just hat on hat football.
Doesn't it? Yeah.

Speaker 1 I saw you tweet this out earlier today about how when you went to St. Elmo's, you asked him what Andrew Luck ordered.
Hank was there. You remember that, Hank? And he orders the chicken?

Speaker 1 We're in the Peyton Manning room downstairs in the basement. It was five years ago.
Not a big deal. And not a big deal.
I think Burger King had paid for us to be there. And

Speaker 1 we were sitting there and the waitress was like, we asked, like, oh, so this is Peyton Manning room, so you used to always come down here. And he's like, yep.
Like, so does Andrew Luck come here now?

Speaker 1 She's like, oh, yeah, he comes. Not as much as Peyton.
He's like, what does he order? He gets the chicken. Yeah.
Nervous little bird. Nervous little bird.
That's right. Retired.

Speaker 1 Harbaugh was 100% correct. Retired.
What do you think Prissette orders? He probably just gets only shrimp, only the shrimp cocktail. I would say he gets, or he does like

Speaker 1 bone in ribeye and then eats it with his hands. Yeah.
Like he's he's a man's man. When knows he wears the helmet, he just brings his own cow in.
Yes.

Speaker 1 He's like, I'm going to kill this at my table if that's fine. Mind if I cut this cow's neck real quick and bleed it out? Yeah.
Yeah. So

Speaker 1 that's what the Colts are now. They have whatever you are in the NFL.
If you don't have the most talent, which the Colts don't,

Speaker 1 as long as you have an identity, you can win. Like, they have an identity.
They know what they want to do.

Speaker 1 Their identity is basically Quentin Nelson is going to act like he's in a bar fight against the worst frat at your school and just run around shoving five guys over.

Speaker 1 And then Baldy watches the tape on Monday and just keeps

Speaker 1 coming and coming and coming. Yeah.
Yeah. Because because he just gets so excited.

Speaker 1 Okay, so now the Colts are now first in the AFC South. And I think they're playing Thursday night against Houston, right? Ooh.
Yeah. Okay, loser leaves town.
Definitely.

Speaker 1 And the Jags, I don't know what you do. I was all in favor of starting Nick Foles because you kind of have to because what you're paying him.
But he was bad after the first touchdown.

Speaker 1 I missed my Uncle Rico, man. Me and Trey.
Damn. I really did.
I miss Gardner Minshew. Say what you want about him, but he makes Sundays a little more special around my house.

Speaker 1 It was also pretty weird that the Jags, I think they ran the ball like nine times, which is the opposite of the cults. It just felt, I don't know.
Maybe they were like, hey, we have Nick Foles back.

Speaker 1 He can do everything. Let him air it out a little bit.
Or maybe they realized that Leonard Fournette is just getting lucky recently with his long runs.

Speaker 1 By the way, did you see, was it Jamal Adams and Leonard Fournette got into this league off? Yeah, that was on Friday, I think. It was,

Speaker 1 what was Leonard saying? No, it was because of the LSU Alabama fight. It was on Monday night.
That's where it started. Oh,

Speaker 1 I thought it was Thursday because of the Miles Garrett thing. It was, yeah.
Yeah. And Leonard Fournette said that Jamal Adams faked an injury or the other way around.

Speaker 1 I think maybe Jamal Adams said that Leonard Fournette. We're doing a terrible job of retelling.
Yeah, but you get it. The bottom line is it was guys busting each other's balls.
Yeah, bottom line is...

Speaker 1 It's beautiful to watch. The NFL can do this league, too.
Leonard Fournette said Jamal Adams was hiding during a party at LSU.

Speaker 1 And then Jamal Adams said,

Speaker 1 coming from the guy that quit on our team and faked an injury, and then Leonard Fournette was like, well, I still still went fourth overall. So it was just, but like, it was all kind of

Speaker 1 dudes. Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 1 All right. Before we get to the next one, Shivas, leading blended Scotch whiskey, Chivis Regal has launched a special new blend.
Shivas 13 Manchester United Special Edition.

Speaker 1 We actually got some to our desk. Delicious.
I had a glass on Friday night before dinner. So good.

Speaker 1 And I'm not like a big drinker, and Shivis is, I might have to get back on the wagon because in honor of the team's. Not during Monday nights, I hope.
That's not true.

Speaker 1 Yeah, Yeah, definitely not during the cleanup night.

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Speaker 1 Chivus 13 Manchester United Special Edition is the first 13-year-old scotch to be released by Chivis Chivvis exclusively in the U.S. and is available on shelves this fall.

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Shivas, do it now. Okay, let's do Bill's Dolphins next.

Speaker 1 Bills,

Speaker 1 this guy's, you ready for this?

Speaker 1 This was the Josh Allen game. It was huge.
This was his best game as a pro, and I want to take this moment to pat ourselves on the back. We nailed it.
We nailed it. So, quick pat, hey, do it.

Speaker 1 Hit it, hit it. Hit that.
Hit it. Hit it.
We told the Bills to draft Josh Allen. They listened, and they're reaping the rewards right now in the form of a double-digit victory at the Dolphins.

Speaker 1 He had three touchdowns

Speaker 1 and a rushing touchdown.

Speaker 1 After that game, do you think Brian Flores pulled his kicker sign? Was like, hey, if you ever do a fucking on-side kick in a game that I'm trying to lose, I will kill you.

Speaker 1 Oh, that was my say something nice about the Dolphins. It was nice.
It was an awesome on-side kick. And it was the second one that's been recovered all season.

Speaker 1 It was a great on-sides kick, but it really accomplished. If I'm their coach or I'm the GM of the Dolphins, if they even have one, I'm mad that we're trying that hard to win a game.
I think

Speaker 1 the kicker recovering his own on-side kick is one of the most electric plays in football. Because you don't know what to do afterwards.
And it never happens, right?

Speaker 1 It happens like you get to see it once every few years where it's just perfect. And he did it perfectly.
The downside to

Speaker 1 recovering your own onside kick as a kicker is in the immediate aftermath, you usually get like a hip bump or like a shoulder bump or something from one of your own players that knocks you down onto the ground.

Speaker 1 Yeah, because then you look like a wuss. Yeah, you recover it in turtle, and then you get up and you do like a jump up and then get smoked.
And then you get smoked by your own kicker.

Speaker 1 Dramatically yourself. Yeah, exactly.
I would just, I would crawl off the field if I was a kicker in that situation.

Speaker 1 Josh Allen has five straight games with two touchdowns and zero interceptions.

Speaker 1 Now, that could be also rushing, not just passing. Sure, we'll count them on.
One of them he had zero touchdowns passing, but two rushing.

Speaker 1 But either way, I feel like this is the Josh Allen is like starting to show it,

Speaker 1 and it feels exciting for the Bills. And I have a question for you, PFT.
The Bills are now 7-3.

Speaker 1 Best record since 1993, this far into the season, or 1999, sorry, this far into the season.

Speaker 1 The teams they have beaten.

Speaker 1 I don't care.

Speaker 1 Target wins.

Speaker 1 So they're legit. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Wait, you said seven wins? Seven and three. Okay, so they beat seven NFL teams that are a combined team.
Okay,

Speaker 1 55. Agreed.
They beat seven NFL teams. 15.

Speaker 1 They're legit.

Speaker 1 The Bills are legit. I looked at their schedule, too.
We do this every week with the Bills. We look ahead.
But it doesn't matter.

Speaker 1 We're like, there's no way that they can keep playing this type of schedule. And they're not going to, but I think they're going to win three more games.

Speaker 1 If you're a Bills fan, I think you're well within your right to just say, to openly admit,

Speaker 1 we haven't beaten anyone. We don't care.

Speaker 1 7-3 is 7-3.

Speaker 1 Sometimes you're basically playing like the Big Ten West schedule. You get to beat up on Purdue and,

Speaker 1 well,

Speaker 1 Nebraska. I don't want to be mean to Nebraska.
I've been trying not to be mean to Nebraska. But you get to beat up on some people, and then you get to say, look at us, we're awesome.

Speaker 1 Listen, you can only play who they schedule you.

Speaker 1 So if you want to go back and talk, you know, 10 years in the future, we can talk about scheduling some more difficult out-of-conference opponents for the Bills.

Speaker 1 When the Bills scheduled Florida State, they were still good. Exactly.
They didn't know they were going to hire Willie Taggart. It's not their fault.
Exactly. That's a brand name.

Speaker 1 That's a marquee program. The Miami Dolphins, they are the only NFL team to go undefeated.
True. And the Bills scheduled them for two games.

Speaker 1 They've got no fear. No fear when it comes to this.
So, yeah, they can only play who they're going to play. I will say this about

Speaker 1 the Dolphins. Ryan Fitzpatrick still looks like he's got some zip on the ball.
Yeah. Yeah.
Devontae Parker's not bad.

Speaker 1 Every time they say his name, I'm like, oh, yeah, he's good. The stadium looks like a great place to take a nap.
Yeah, it's going to host the Super Bowl. Yeah.
I can't wait. That'll be good.

Speaker 1 Say something nice about the Dolphins. Do you have anything nice about the Dolphins to say, Hank?

Speaker 1 The kick was great. The kick was great.

Speaker 1 It was great. It was great to watch.
I bet the Dolphins money line, and they had a chance.

Speaker 1 No, not really. No, don't go too fast.
Josh Allen just absolutely plugged up their blow hole with his dick and said, you're not breathing. They were never even close.
But that's okay.

Speaker 1 You tried to say something nice.

Speaker 1 I have noticed about Josh Allen, he scores a lot of touchdowns on rushes where he sticks the ball out with his giant hand that everyone said, oh, he's got, it's not a big deal.

Speaker 1 He's got over 10-inch hands. Well, guess what? He's just like grazing the pylon so many times over the course of a season.

Speaker 1 He probably gets two extra touchdowns a year because his hands are slightly bigger.

Speaker 1 Yeah, when Derek Carr and Josh Allen see each other at the Pro Bowl, Derek Carr is definitely going to be like, can you just put your hands right over mine for a second, real quick?

Speaker 1 Let's just take this picture like always sunny. All right, so the Bills are seven and three,

Speaker 1 feeling good.

Speaker 1 Again,

Speaker 1 doesn't matter who they play. Who cares? Nope.

Speaker 1 Also, John Brown's awesome. Yes.
That was a great, great job by the Bills. He's awesome.
What did Warren Sharp say? They went the opposite way.

Speaker 1 They just got small, fast wide receivers instead of big wide receivers. They run underneath Josh Allen's balls.
Yeah, that's brilliant. It's very brilliant.

Speaker 1 Okay, next up, let's do the historic game. I'm talking about the Broncos and Vikings because we had the, this is the game where when you sit and tell yourself they're statistically due,

Speaker 1 this is the game we're talking about.

Speaker 1 Teams were 0 and 99, excuse me, when trailing by 20 or more at half. And Kirk Cousins as a Viking was 0-10 and 1 when trailing in the fourth quarter.
And the Vikings won.

Speaker 1 They came back from 20 points at halftime. They won this game.
Kirk Cousins has his feel-good game. Holy shit.
Are the Vikings

Speaker 1 good?

Speaker 1 I'm starting to believe in the Vikings. And I know it's crazy.

Speaker 1 But I apologize.

Speaker 1 It's true, you did. And then I asked if

Speaker 1 the Vikings fans should apologize to me for asking me to apologize to them. Well, this is my other apology that I'm making right now.

Speaker 1 I am a believer in the Minnesota Vikings.

Speaker 1 I still have a lot of questions about Kirk Cousins, but I'm kind of believing in them now because this game right here, this is the exact game that Minnesota Vikings would be on the other side of.

Speaker 1 Well, this is the exact type of heartbreak that the Vikings franchise has dealt with consistently.

Speaker 1 And the fact that maybe they've just seen it happen so many times to them that they finally learned how to win that exact game.

Speaker 1 But a win like this, that's something that you can actually build on. That's a good point.

Speaker 1 And it also, if not a comeback loss like the Broncos suffered, the Vikings, at least the old Vikings, would have just rolled over and died.

Speaker 1 Like, they would have come out in the second half, and it would have been more of the same. I think of that game they lost last year to the Bills when they were 17-point favorites at home.

Speaker 1 They're 10.5-point favorites today.

Speaker 1 And whatever it is, I don't know what it is, but this Vikings team does feel a little bit different. And Kirk Cousins, we're going to say some nice things about Kirk.
He has been awesome this year.

Speaker 1 He's been really good. He has 18 touchdowns and three interceptions.

Speaker 1 He's won a big game, prime time game. He won today.

Speaker 1 So I'm very excited to bet against him in the playoffs. But

Speaker 1 everything else is nice. That's actually a really nice thing to say about Kirk Cousins.

Speaker 1 You're implying that he's going to make the playoffs. Well, my favorite thing is

Speaker 1 when teams win that I've maybe not been nice to, because either they're my rival or whatever, fans will always say, like, put a gun to my head and be like, say something nice about Kirk Cousins.

Speaker 1 Say something nice about the Vikings. So I said that.
I said, Kirk Cousins has been phenomenal this year, and I'm so excited to bet against him in the playoffs.

Speaker 1 So excited. Kirk Cousins has played exceptionally well after sneaking up on Adam Thielen in his sleep and slicing his hamstring just a little bit with the scalpel after the brouhaha they had together.

Speaker 1 Yeah, Kirk's been good.

Speaker 1 I still don't think he's a great quarterback, but the Vikings are playing well. Mike Zimmer laughed.
in the press conference afterwards.

Speaker 1 Now, there are certain things that a head coach like Mike Zimmer will laugh about in a press conference. One is

Speaker 1 coaches will laugh about their wives being mad at them a lot. You're allowed to laugh about that.

Speaker 1 You're allowed to laugh at a reporter asking a question where they don't know what they're talking about from a football stance.

Speaker 1 And then you're allowed to laugh at the fact that that game just took years off your life, and you're probably going to die sooner because of it. And that's what he went with this time.

Speaker 1 Don't forget the one dark horse.

Speaker 1 If a fire alarm goes off or someone walks in, like opens a door that they shouldn't open.

Speaker 1 They can laugh at that too. Yeah, yeah.
That's like blooper. That's a classic.
That's like a slapstick when it comes for head coaches.

Speaker 1 They can recognize that moment and be like, oh, I should laugh. This is unusual.

Speaker 1 This is crazy. Should we talk about the Broncos? I've got a quote here.
Okay, because I have a quote, too. I have one question.

Speaker 1 Where is Drew Locke?

Speaker 1 Good question. Because

Speaker 1 there was an interview. I think it was Vaughn Miller said this after practice.
He said, Drew Locke is going to kill it. He's going to kill it.
He's got everything you need.

Speaker 1 The other day, he ran out and did a little bootleg and kind of threw it.

Speaker 1 It was an incomplete pass, but I've seen a lot of good ones play, and that was probably the best incomplete pass that I've ever seen thrown.

Speaker 1 So, Drew Locke sounds like he might be the answer in Denver.

Speaker 1 Okay, so that's I love that quote, and I was going to say, John Elway, this is the worst case scenario for the Broncos because the Broncos have now had four losses of four points or less and four losses where they've been leading in the fourth quarter.

Speaker 1 So, John Elway can reasonably tell tell himself they're right there.

Speaker 1 They're just so close. Like, the pieces are there.

Speaker 1 They're going to be fine, except for Vic Fangio, who I don't know if you saw, there was an article this week that Vic Fangio is maybe losing the locker room.

Speaker 1 And the quote was, he doesn't have great people skills. And that is the biggest, oh, you think of all time that Vic Fanji.
Vic Fangio was never hired for his people skills.

Speaker 1 He's been a defensive coordinator for like basically 85 years and he's only 60. And so he was hired to be grumpy and to not get along with anyone and hopefully coach the hell out of the defense.
So

Speaker 1 it's just interesting that they hired Vic Fangio and then in a matter of a half a season, they're like, hey,

Speaker 1 this guy's not really like, he doesn't really say like, hey, hey, what's up? Or how's your wife? Or hey, you know, got any plans for the weekend? He's kind of grumpy about it. Yeah, no shit.

Speaker 1 It's Vic Fangio. Yeah, you hired Bill Belichick's personality without all the winning that goes along with that.
Right.

Speaker 1 Like, yeah, if you hire a grumpy guy and you're winning football games, you're adorable.

Speaker 1 You're so grumpy, you're adorable. You're like, look how mad he is, even though you should be happy right now.
But if you're just grumpy and the team's bad, then it becomes a shitstorm.

Speaker 1 But John Elway did give him a vote of confidence after the game. Oh, nice.
So Elway's got his back. Which Elway might not have a vote of confidence.

Speaker 1 But that's good. You just pass it around.
He doesn't have a vote of confidence to give? This is... Well, no,

Speaker 1 he might be...

Speaker 1 I'm pretty sure once the ownership situation gets figured out and Bill Gates buys. Which is Elway giving his confidence to because that person doesn't have confidence in Elway.

Speaker 1 The fans don't have confidence in Elway, but Elway has used his confidence of just being John Elway to then give it to Vic Fangia. That's the only vote that he has.
Right. His vote of confidence.

Speaker 1 Of his own confidence. He's a very confident man.
But no one has confidence in Elway.

Speaker 1 So he's basically just passing around confidence that he doesn't have. So he's printing fiat confidence.
Correct. And there's nothing in the Federal Reserve of confidence.
Yes.

Speaker 1 There's no actual gold confidence backing that up. It's the picture of like Germany right right before the recession when it's just like the little kids sitting with bundles of cash.

Speaker 1 Well, that ended well, so

Speaker 1 that's John Elway right now. He's sitting in his office with bundles of fake confidence that he keeps printing.
It's pre-World War II Germany right now. I actually in Denver, Colorado.

Speaker 1 I wouldn't be shocked if John Elway was like said to his secretary, who absolutely calls Hun, and he was like, Hun, can you go to the printer real quick and print me some more of that confidence that I got?

Speaker 1 And she's just printing off sheets that literally say John Elway's confidence. And he's handing them out left and right as people come into the facility.

Speaker 1 Yeah, he's got the real expensive ones, the real pricey confidence he frames and then gives them people to be like, hang this one on your wall.

Speaker 1 That one's worth its weight in gold. So he's got Brandon Allen, who he doesn't have a vote of confidence in.
Nope. Because Brandon Allen is but six foot two.
And too many Allens.

Speaker 1 And too many Allens going on. Hardly.
Let's talk about Kyle Allen in a minute, but the Allens are... Josh, we have Josh is good.
Josh is Allen one. And the other ones,

Speaker 1 I think it's enough is enough. Yes.

Speaker 1 And then they've got Flacco, who you want to talk about, a guy that's getting old yellow and taken out back right now. Yeah.
Flacco is at the end of his leash. Maybe the Chicago Bears will take him.

Speaker 1 That would fit in perfectly. It would be great.
Just another bridge quarterback for the next year. Just knock off a couple more years on my health.

Speaker 1 Yeah, and then you can laugh about that too because you're a football guy like Mike Sarah.

Speaker 1 So then they've got...

Speaker 1 Then they've got Drew Locke. And Drew Locke, I think, is healthy now.

Speaker 1 But he's not playing. And throwing great incompletions.
Throwing insanely good incompletions. Okay, so the Broncos are a mess.

Speaker 1 So, what we've figured out from all this is that the Vikings are good and the Broncos are a complete disaster. Yes, okay.
Next up,

Speaker 1 let's go Saints, Bucks, Saints, $34,17.

Speaker 1 PFT, I have the SeatGeek question for you. By the way, we're on Barstow Gold, barstillgold.com slash PMT.
You can watch us break down all of week 11 on barstowgold.com slash PMT.

Speaker 1 Okay, PFT, the SeatGeek question. Promo code take, $10 off.
You can go watch an NFL game. Go to the Thanksgiving game, promo code take, $10 off your SeatGeek purchase.
I bet you

Speaker 1 the Bears line is going to be a $9 ticket. Yes.
So they'll pay you to go if you put in promo code take.

Speaker 1 How many interceptions does Jameis Winson have this season?

Speaker 1 17. 18.
18. All right.
18 and 10 games.

Speaker 1 Congrats. He had another four today.

Speaker 1 Now, the back interception,

Speaker 1 that wasn't Jameis' fault, but I think Jameis has gotten to the point where he's like your unlucky friend who nothing's really his fault, but he keeps

Speaker 1 getting fired from his job and

Speaker 1 has girl problems and his car breaks down all the time.

Speaker 1 And then when his car breaks down, he takes an Uber and he finds the one Uber driver that doesn't want to be hit on by him. Right, exactly.
That kind of thing. Exactly.

Speaker 1 So he is that friend who's like, yeah, you know, if things were different, maybe it would work out. But right now, you're just unlucky.
There's a lot of stuff that adds up, and

Speaker 1 it can't all be bad luck. Right.
There's got to be something else behind that.

Speaker 1 The back interception where the guy.

Speaker 1 Explain it so that people didn't watch the game. So he threw a pass.
Who was it? Was it OJ that caught it? I think it might have been O.J. Howard.
And then O.J.

Speaker 1 like puts it behind his back as he's bobbling it. And then it bounces off his back and he gets tackled.
And the Saints recover it. They're the Harlem Globetrotters of turning the ball over.

Speaker 1 They have the most spectacular fumbles and interceptions of any team I've seen in a long time. It's very entertaining.

Speaker 1 Jameis was squinting again. He was big time squinting.
He was squinting big time. Doesn't help that he plays in Florida.
People say, like, oh, it's so cool.

Speaker 1 Patrick Mahomes throws another no-look pass. Jameis Winston throws every pass, no-look, because he can't see the field.
He cannot see.

Speaker 1 So I was looking it up because I was hoping that Jameis Winston could get the record for interceptions in a season. What do you think the record is for interceptions in a season?

Speaker 1 He's got to be five, right? Nope. Well, so there's a pre-Super Bowl era and then a post-Super Bowl era.

Speaker 1 How could you The pre-Super Bowl era has got to be like four because they passed the ball six times a year. No, no, no, no.
I found some shit. George Blanda, who's a Hall of Famer, mind you,

Speaker 1 in the year 1962, in a 14-game season, how many interceptions did he have? 14-game six. I don't know.
It's got to be a lot then. 30? 42? What the fuck, Blanda? Dude, I was in backup.

Speaker 1 I was shocked when I saw this. And ready for the craziest part? The team went 11-3.
And he threw threw 42 interceptions. How many touchdowns did he throw? He had

Speaker 1 like 20? I don't know. He finished his George Blanda.
All right, so here was my favorite game.

Speaker 1 Here's my favorite game. Week seven, he went eight for 18, 104 yards, zero touchdowns, six interceptions.

Speaker 1 He had 42 interceptions. George Blanda, by the way, is our new guy for any Hall of Fame case we want to make.

Speaker 1 Like James Winston is a Hall of Famer because George Bland is a Hall of Famer because he went 53 and 50 as a quarterback, 236 touchdowns, 277 interceptions. That isn't true.

Speaker 1 George Blind had 42 interceptions in a 14-game schedule. He had six interceptions in two games.
So I'm looking on Pro Football Reference right now.

Speaker 1 They actually have it graded out by fantasy points for him, too, kind of like how we were talking about with Jerry Rice. So he had a number of games that were like negative one,

Speaker 1 four points, two points, and they were a fucking good team. That's crazy.
Yeah, 11-3.

Speaker 1 Unbelievable. So, yeah, Jameis.
It must have been punts. as well.
Maybe that's what punts were back in the day. You just punted instead of interceptions? Yeah.

Speaker 1 We always say you learn more from a turnover than you do from a touchdown. So Blanda learned a shitload and then he got good and became a Hall of Famer.

Speaker 1 Jameis is just storing up all this knowledge that he's gaining from throwing in these interceptions. Yeah, so the post-Super Bowl or the Super Bowl era is Vinny Teseverdi in 1988.

Speaker 1 He had 35 interceptions. Shout out to Vinny.
35. So we're probably not going to get there with Jameis.

Speaker 1 I was hoping when I saw it, I was like, man, this would be great if Jameis could just get us a record. Like, because imagine week 16 and 17 watching Jameis try to get the record.

Speaker 1 That would be thrilling. But I don't think he's getting.
So we have hope maybe

Speaker 1 if he goes crazy here in the end, he could maybe break Vinny Teseverdi's Super Bowl-era 35 interceptions, but I don't know. Wait, is he on pace to break that? No, to 18 interceptions in 10 games.

Speaker 1 Okay. So we're going to need you to crank it up a little bit here, Jameis.
He's going to need to. He's start taking some chances, Jameis.
And

Speaker 1 actually, like, the only reason it could happen is I think Bruce Arians loves Jameis Winston. He loves throwing the ball deep.
Yeah. And he's never going to stop throwing the ball deep.

Speaker 1 Bruce Arians probably just looks at Jameis Winston like assisted suicide. Yeah.
Where he's like, I got a C on my last physical that I took. I thought that was really good.

Speaker 1 If Jameis can just keep throwing interceptions, then I'll achieve my lifelong goal of just passing away on the sidelines with a smile on my face. Yeah, he's going to do it for me.
Thank you, Jameis.

Speaker 1 You're the perfect quarterback for it. He also threw a pass left-handed.
Completed. Yes.

Speaker 1 That was

Speaker 1 a a real shocker. Yeah.
So good job. And then, as for the Saints,

Speaker 1 I feel like the Saints, this was a big game just answering the bell because everyone's like, what's going on with the Saints? Why did they lose the Falcons?

Speaker 1 They absolutely pasted the Bucs here, and that's what they should have done.

Speaker 1 There was a little handshake deal from Bruce Arians to Sean Payton saying, hey, thanks for letting the Falcons beat you and ensuring an extension for Dan Quinn.

Speaker 1 So we'll let you run rough shot on us today. Yeah.
The Bucs jerseys were too red today. Yeah, and also

Speaker 1 I don't like the

Speaker 1 numbers. Yeah, the clock.
Where it looks like it's, yeah, like a digital clock. Yep, there are two things that I will stand on the table and defend to my death hating.

Speaker 1 And that is the alarm clock numbers that remind me too much of waking up in the morning on the Bucs jerseys. And then the Apple commercial where it has the sound of your alarm going off.

Speaker 1 And I hear it, and it just makes my blood pressure rise. I fucking hate that.

Speaker 1 You should not be allowed to do a fake alarm in a commercial. It's genius.
It always gets your attention. I hate it.
It always gets your attention. That and Orange Vanilla Coke.
Remember that?

Speaker 1 Oh, yeah. That was the worst.

Speaker 1 I wish that Michael Thomas would stand out a little bit for something that he does because he's so good. Yeah.
But he doesn't.

Speaker 1 If you ask me, what is one thing that Michael Thomas does really well, my answer to you is going to be route running. And that's my answer when I don't know what he does really well.

Speaker 1 He's got good hands. Hands and receptions.
He's a great ball skills. Great route runner.
But I can't. He finds the ball.

Speaker 1 I couldn't tell you off the top of my head what he is the best in the league at, but he's

Speaker 1 got some

Speaker 1 90 catches through 10 games. He's the best catcher.
He's a ball hog. He's easy.
Yeah,

Speaker 1 he's just a great catcher. He's always open and always catches the ball.
Yeah, so the Saints are back on track.

Speaker 1 Back in the conversation for best team in the NFC. I don't know.
I feel like all the NFC teams, we talk about it at the end, but they're all a little bit flawed.

Speaker 1 Saints, Vikings, Seahawks, 49ers, Packers, Packers.

Speaker 1 I don't know. They're all like, I could look at them and be like, eh, maybe.
I guess every team, though. The only team right now that feels almost untouchable is the Ravens.
We'll get to in a second.

Speaker 1 Agreed. Only team.
Just.

Speaker 1 I mean, the Patriots have some offensive line issues. That's all I'll say.
Yeah. Yeah.
Okay. All right.
Jets, Redskins.

Speaker 1 Sam Darnold.

Speaker 1 Back. Back.
Run the table. Needed to play a bad team.
They did it. Run the table.

Speaker 1 Yo.

Speaker 1 If they beat the Raiders, this is similar to my, if the Bears beat the Rams, it opens the portal. If they beat the Raiders next week, Raiders have to go to New York, always tough.
Time, clock.

Speaker 1 They got the Bengals and the Dolphins. They could quickly become six and seven.
They could. And then you don't know.
Then the table might get ran. I have a question for you, big cat.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 And I don't know the answer to this, so maybe you will. Has an interim head coach ever been fired?

Speaker 1 Bill Bryan should. Callahan.
Callahan. Italian.
Bill Bryan also should. You really hate the mix, huh? Yeah.
I'm not a fan of the Irish. Well, Bill Bryan should have been fired a long time ago.

Speaker 1 Yeah, so I don't. I'm in a firing frenzy right now.
I'm like, I'm ready to fire everyone. Yeah, you're lashing.
I really am. It feels good to just be like, fire that guy, fire that guy.

Speaker 1 It's really the only outlet a fan has.

Speaker 1 It's just be like, fire him. Shit can him.
Fire that guy.

Speaker 1 Callahan is not going to get fired because it really wouldn't accomplish anything, except maybe you elevate Rob Ryan or Jim Tom Sula to head coach. Yeah, fun.
To interim, interim head coach. Yeah.

Speaker 1 That would be a perfect job title for Jim Tom Sula to have, considering the other jobs that he's had.

Speaker 1 Where was one like cat salesman? He was the

Speaker 1 auto mechanic. Yeah.
I think he was like a cat vomit cleaner up.

Speaker 1 Wrangler.

Speaker 1 With cats? An interim, interim head coach position for Jim Tom would be pretty solid. I like that.
The Redskins are just trash.

Speaker 1 Here's how bleak things are for this franchise. You ready?

Speaker 1 They tried to get a sell-the-team chant going in the stadium, but there weren't enough people in the stands to make it happen. So funny.
Which is a great job by Dan Snyder.

Speaker 1 He's made himself immune to receiving criticism from his own fan base

Speaker 1 because it's three quarters filled with opposing teams' fans every weekend. Genius.

Speaker 1 So,

Speaker 1 I addressed this last week, but I'm obsessed with teams that are losing or teams that are bad having to hop on Twitter and tweet something good that happened.

Speaker 1 Today's teams that are bad that tweeted something good that happened came from the Redskins when they scored down 34-3 in the the fourth quarter and they just used a bunch of exclamation points and then got roasted online.

Speaker 1 Well, I mean, it's so awesome. To be fair, I think we had gone 15 quarters without a touchdown at that point.
Since October 13th. Yeah,

Speaker 1 it had been 35 calendar days since the Redskins' last touchdown. Yes.
And you could take that and add 14 more onto it

Speaker 1 if you don't count the Miami Dolphins touchdowns. Yeah.
Because those are really asterisks as well. Right.
But yeah, it's been a tough season, tough offensive season.

Speaker 1 So I have the fix for the Washington Redskins. That doesn't include Dan Snyder selling the team because he never is.
The Redskins should draft Tua.

Speaker 1 That would fix it all. Here's what

Speaker 1 you're out here. Keeping their lower legs.
Hear me out. Very healthy.
Tua is probably not going to. I would imagine he's not going to be 100% healthy for next year.

Speaker 1 If you draft Tua, you have now two shots at the franchise quarterback situation here because Dwayne Haskins is bad, but I also am like, he's pretty much in the worst possible situation.

Speaker 1 It's kind of Josh Rosen last year, where can we accurately figure this out when he doesn't have a coach? And it's like, it's a whole shit show.

Speaker 1 If he doesn't get broken through this year, I will be shocked. I don't know if you saw him trying to give a pump-up speech to the offensive line today.

Speaker 1 He's like, come on, guys, we're football players. We play for you, that sort of thing.
And the offensive line just looked at him like, dude, this is Washington. He He had an awesome throw.

Speaker 1 His best throw is a pro, and then it was immediately called back for holding.

Speaker 1 But if they draft Tua, and then Tua, you can sit Tua next year, let him get 100% healthy, see if Dwayne Haskins is the guy when you bring in a new coach.

Speaker 1 And then if he's not, you now have, you didn't just say, oh, well, Dwayne Haskins is going to be fine.

Speaker 1 We'll just walk, you know, we'll just let this high pick go when we have a guy who could be awesome, but is hurt. Like, it's a perfect storm.
They could put Tua on ice for that training staff.

Speaker 1 I know, I know, I know, I know, I know. But I'm just saying, this is a smart team would do something like this.
We're like, hey, we just drafted a guy, but we can now get a guy maybe at a discount.

Speaker 1 I don't think you understand just how bad of a situation would be. So in addition to the training staff,

Speaker 1 which is misdiagnosing cancer in their players for five years in a row, and the field that he would have to play on. Correct.
That would be like the Amsterdam Admirals drafting Josh Gordon. It's fine.

Speaker 1 It would be a bad situation.

Speaker 1 I'm telling you, though, I would rather, if you're a Redskins fan, I'd rather take to let him sit for a year and then draft a guy who's like, you know what, he's probably in three years going to be really good and then demand a trade.

Speaker 1 I don't know.

Speaker 1 I don't want to see that happen. Can we? Okay, so I had a question for you, PFT, as well for this game.
Oh, one other thing. Jamal Adams is...

Speaker 1 like why you don't trade your awesome players, even if they're pissed off because he's fucking awesome. He had three sacks.
Say he had three sacks today.

Speaker 1 but he's awesome, and that's why, like, if your best player says, Oh, I don't want to be here, just do whatever you can to make sure that they're happy. That's what you do.
Yes, um, I saw, I took a

Speaker 1 picture when Robbie Anderson scored a touchdown. He like basically went in the crowd, and next to him was a guy wearing a Jets helmet, yep, fully strapped up.
So, my question is: rank these fans

Speaker 1 helmet, strapped-up helmet fan, yeah, face paint fan, fan.

Speaker 1 Receiver gloves fan. Okay,

Speaker 1 I'm going to go face paint fan number one. Okay.
On there, because you can always take a helmet off. It takes you at least like 30 minutes to get your face cleaned off entirely.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 Commit after. Yeah.
And when you have the face paint on, you probably have to stop in a store or like run some errands at some point in your day while you're still wearing the face paint.

Speaker 1 And that's just like a laugh out loud, funny situation for me. It's like a guy running into his bank to like drop off his paycheck while he's all he's got like the Zubaz coloring on the face.

Speaker 1 Yeah, he's got like a little in his sideburns. He's got a little bit of paint still there on Tuesday.

Speaker 1 Yeah, Justin Trudeau has given numerous State of the Union speeches with some shoe polish on his sideburns.

Speaker 1 So then I'm going number two, helmet fan. Okay.
I like helmet fan especially because you can put the beers on the side and make it a foam dome. Oh, that's not real though.

Speaker 1 I'm talking with the real helmet. You got to wear the real helmet.
The team-issued authentic one? Yeah. By the way, American Ninja Warriors on.
That's the sign that we're about to get loopy.

Speaker 1 That's the sign. Yeah, that is.
It's literally the Sunday sign. That's like waking up and was it Charmed is still on your TV after the NCAA tournament?

Speaker 1 Wait, I just saw one of the producers for American Ninja Warrior is named Kyle Weed. Yeah, Kyle Weed, pretty sick.
What a fucking name. Yeah.
Kyle Weed. And he works on American Ninja.

Speaker 1 He's definitely in CBD business. So number three, you have receiver gloves.
Receiver gloves. And I'm not.
Pooh-pooing the receiver gloves guy. I like the receiver gloves guy.

Speaker 1 I love receiver gloves guy because receiver gloves guy, first of all, they do the thing where they

Speaker 1 connect it in the end zone.

Speaker 1 And then receiver gloves guy, you can always see the receiver gloves guy because he's the type of guy who wears, like he doesn't go to the gym, but he wears like Under Armor Pro gear and like Gore-Tex and like the, like, hey man, I'm, you know, I got the fucking leggings on, even though I have no leggings and then shorts, like the Kobe leggings.

Speaker 1 And he just thinks that he's forever in this like, uh athletic environment, even though he doesn't play sports.

Speaker 1 And he stands in the end zone and he's like, I'm ready to go I got my receiver gloves you're like dude you're 45 years old and your kids are next to you and they're not even wearing receiver gloves I think receiver gloves guy is the most illusional like the face paint guy

Speaker 1 you have to have that moment with yourself where you're face painting in the mirror and you have like that realization like okay this is who I am receiver gloves guy can live his life in this fantasy world without ever having to like come to Jesus about it.

Speaker 1 So he still thinks that he's normal. Right.
Face paint guy has accepted the fact that he's a little bit out there.

Speaker 1 And same with helmet guy, because helmet guy, everyone kind of hits him on the head, and he's a constant reminder, like, you're a weirdo.

Speaker 1 Receiver gloves guy thinks everything he does is totally normal and that's why I like him. How much does a pair of receiver gloves cost? Like the real authentic ones? Are they like $100?

Speaker 1 Really that much? Yeah, I think so. $100?

Speaker 1 Yeah. And they're only used to be worn to games?

Speaker 1 Standing in the end zone. Yeah, staying in the end zone and then making the sign.
That is pretty delusional. And I think you hit the nail on the head.
A receiver gloves guy is absolutely Kobe Stan.

Speaker 1 Yes. He's a big Mariana Rivera fan

Speaker 1 and he's he he just doesn't he doesn't think anything he's doing is weird and I almost I love those people who live in this fantasy world whereas face paint guy and helmet guy they know at the heart of hearts like they're like there's something off with them they understand the reality of how fucked up their fantasy world is their friends are all other super fans yeah whereas whereas receiver gloves guy is at a regular you know he's got his his forward pickup truck and he's doing the whole tailgate and being like i'm fine has a cooler cooler that he spent way too much money on that he busts out.

Speaker 1 Shows everyone. Yeah.
No, you want to come check this out.

Speaker 1 All right. That was Jets Redskins.
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Speaker 1 Falcons Panthers. Dan Quinn's getting in extension.
Big time. He's earned it the last couple weeks.

Speaker 1 He's won two divisional games. Tough to do.
He didn't lose a locker room.

Speaker 1 That's what the danger was. When he didn't get fired in the bye week, he was very much in danger of being like, well, our owner's given up on our team.
Right. So what are we going to play for it?

Speaker 1 They're playing for Dan Quinn. I think that Dan Quinn can actually walk into Arthur Blank's office and be like, hey, Art or Mr.
Blank or whatever you call him, weirdo with the wispy mustache.

Speaker 1 We just had the bye week at the wrong time. Like, if we had a bye week at week five, we would be in the playoffs.
Yeah, like it just came at the wrong time. We needed a rest, we got healthy.

Speaker 1 We're peaking, we're still playing our best football right now. The Falcons haven't played their best game of 2019.
Fuck them, man.

Speaker 1 I have a fun stat. You ready for this? Yeah.
So, this was a game, as so often happens around the NFL between a bird team and a cat team. There are several of each.
Okay. Right?

Speaker 1 I don't know if you're a big astrology guy. Huge.
I am. Then you know that Mercury's been in retrograde.
Always. So while Mercury has been in retrograde,

Speaker 1 the bird teams are 90% against the spread. Whoa.
So they've won nine out of 10 games against the spread. The cats.
Who's crunching these numbers? I did.

Speaker 1 I did it myself.

Speaker 1 I did it myself.

Speaker 1 The big cat teams are one and eight against the spread while Mercury is in retrograde. Doesn't Mercury go in retrograde all the time? Yeah, so it's really valuable to know this information.

Speaker 1 Okay, okay.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I mean, I'm in.

Speaker 1 The Falcons, I am now losing money on the Falcons because I think that they're not good and they are good all of a sudden, and they're going to probably win their next three games.

Speaker 1 Like, they're going to win on Thanksgiving night against the Saints at home. And everyone's going to be like,

Speaker 1 I don't know. Why not?

Speaker 1 Why the fuck not? Dan Quinn somehow has them. Like, now their defense just started playing.
They have like 11 sacks in the last two weeks out of nowhere.

Speaker 1 I wouldn't be surprised if I looked up in week 17 and Matt Ryan had the most passing yards of any quarterback in the NFL. Yeah.
It's just like one of those weird seasons. He's going to do it.
Right.

Speaker 1 It's just a weird thing where the Falcons will end up like 8-8 somehow, and everyone will be like, oh,

Speaker 1 next year they're going to make the leap. So now we need to ask if Ron Rivera is in danger of losing his locker room.

Speaker 1 Well, Ron Rivera and Kyle Allen, more importantly, Kyle Allen, he is in dangerous, dangerous level here where he can lose his status of guy who can do something.

Speaker 1 Yeah, well, the problem is, if you throw four interceptions in a game, you better already have the reputation of a gunslinger. Right.

Speaker 1 And we haven't put the name gunslinger, the term gunslinger on Kyle Allen yet. So you're not allowed to get away with that.

Speaker 1 I feel like he's gotten worse, too, since Warren Sharp told us about his small hands. Yeah.
I might just

Speaker 1 say that. Yeah, right, exactly.
But he, since the Kyle Allen hype reached its absolute peak, he's thrown three touchdowns and nine interceptions. And since, did you know Damian Woody?

Speaker 1 I don't know if we ever talked about this. He said defenses are more afraid of Kyle Allen than Cam Newton.
Is that a fact? He said that. He said that.

Speaker 1 Right now? Yeah, maybe. Maybe.
Yeah, I guess because Cam Newton is physically unable to play. He can't play.
How crazy is it that people actually said we should trade Cam Newton?

Speaker 1 Like, every time someone asked me, do you want Cam Newton on the Bears? I'm like, why would the Panthers trade Cam Newton?

Speaker 1 Just because Kyle Allen? Just because Kyle Allen looks serviceable for a few weeks. Okay.
Kyle Allen had Moxie. When he's playing well, he's got Moxie.
He does. But

Speaker 1 he is dangerously close to being not even a backup.

Speaker 1 We talked about it with Jeff Driscoll. When you get called upon, you want to do just enough that people can say, ooh,

Speaker 1 he was okay. We want him in the room.

Speaker 1 Kyle Allen had done that. He almost got starter.
Now he's going all the way backwards where it's like, yo, you stink. Yeah, what about Will Greer? We haven't seen anything about Will Greer.

Speaker 1 No one's talked about him. I don't know where he is.
I figure you might as well just kick the tires on him. He might be throwing incomplete.

Speaker 1 Von Miller's like, holy shit. Yeah, you never know until you get him out there.
Yeah, you're right. Kyle Allen, he's got a great name, great quarterback name.
Sounds like a Texas kid.

Speaker 1 Seems like a guy you could throw out there and have some fun throwing around the yard with. But I think, yeah, it's time to bring him back to his rightful home.
And that's as a backup player.

Speaker 1 Yeah, just chilling out.

Speaker 1 Be the backup. Good visor name.

Speaker 1 Okay, Texans-Ravens, the much-anticipated game of the weekend that really just sucked because the Ravens steamrolled the Texans.

Speaker 1 Lamar Jackson does something ridiculous every single week, and their defense is awesome now, which wasn't to start.

Speaker 1 If that pass interference call got called, the Texans gave you a completely different game. Thank you.

Speaker 1 I am so sick of the NFL's pass interference calls because that was blatant pass interference, and then they challenged it, and they didn't change it, and the Texans would have had first and goal.

Speaker 1 The Ravens still would have won, but they would have had first and and goal, would have went up 7-0.

Speaker 1 And here's the test. Here's what they should start doing.
Instead of challenging the pass interference, they should just look. And if the cornerback looks for a flag more than twice, that's a flag.

Speaker 1 Yeah, if the cornerback pops up and does the immediate incomplete sign, then that's not pass interference. Marlon Humphrey literally just, his eyes just darted around.

Speaker 1 He's like, okay, where's that flag? Where's that flag? I literally mugged DeAndre Hopkins on the goal line.

Speaker 1 The odds for overturning a pass interference call as a coach when you challenge it are roughly the same as when we would do the MJ versus LeBron simulator and getting Kobe as the answer. Yes.

Speaker 1 That's about it. It's like one out of every 20 times.
They'll just decide to turn it over, and there's no rhyme or reason to when it happens. And then they turned it over

Speaker 1 in San Francisco when it wasn't as egregious as this one. That's because they don't like Richard Sherman.
It was fucking maddening.

Speaker 1 It's so, so frustrating how inconsistent it is and how stupid the rule is. Like, they just don't use it correctly.
And I'm so mad that it's like, I shouldn't waste my energy being mad about it.

Speaker 1 Being mad about it, but we are. And look at us, it's just kind of fun to be mad about it.
Paul Rudd Gift. I don't know yet.
Imagine us. Look at us.
Look at us. Look at us.
Here we are.

Speaker 1 Who would have thought? Not me.

Speaker 1 Not me. Yeah, we are.

Speaker 1 Yeah,

Speaker 1 I don't know how they decide to have it overturned. Like, what sort of evidence they need if they need two eyewitnesses?

Speaker 1 They need like you need to fill in one of those CAPTCHA things, like you're entering a password online.

Speaker 1 I don't know what sets it off and makes it past interference and makes it overturnable, but it's very frustrating. Very frustrating.
I agree with you.

Speaker 1 And I also agree that the fact that it happens so early in the game does make a difference. Yeah.

Speaker 1 You know, about like that old saying, if you're launching a rocket and you're two degrees off on takeoff, then you miss the moon entirely. But if you're two

Speaker 1 inches off on landing, you're still on the moon. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Some basketball coaches. I think you're thinking of

Speaker 1 Mighty Ducks.

Speaker 1 Two inches, two inches to the right, and he makes it. And then the guy's like two inches left, you missed the whole thing.
Yeah. you wouldn't have joinked it at all.

Speaker 1 Yeah, but no, you know, like when you're launching a rocket two inches off in the other direction,

Speaker 1 there was like some coach that said that. I think it was a basketball coach that said it over the weekend or something like that.
Trying to be a football coach.

Speaker 1 But if you fuck up at the start of the game,

Speaker 1 seven points makes a big difference. Yes, it's, I mean, well, it made a difference for the over.
It did. Let's just say that.
You can say that.

Speaker 1 I also want to say that I respect the hell out of the people that are dying on the Lamar Jackson stinks hill. Oh, it's

Speaker 1 a little bit.

Speaker 1 There's not many people left. There's not many people left on it, but the ones that have chosen to stay and just ride out this storm of being really wrong, but going down with a ship, God bless you.

Speaker 1 I think I need to, like, every single week because I still have the stray Ravens fans who are like, still think they're frauds. Dude, I haven't thought they're frauds for like a month now.

Speaker 1 They're really, really good. Yeah.
And Lamar Jackson is electric, and their defense is their defense feels like it's completely different than it was to start the year.

Speaker 1 Because that was my biggest thing, was their defense I didn't think could stop people. And now they made Deshaun Watson look stupid.
Look real bad.

Speaker 1 The front seven look very good. Now the offensive line of the Houston Texans is another story altogether.
I want to throw another fan into your hypothetical ranking list. Yeah.

Speaker 1 And this one is more specific to the Baltimore area.

Speaker 1 The team color camo cargo pants. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Baltimore has, I would say, like 15,000 fans that go to every game on Sunday wearing those black, white, silver, and gray, and a little bit of purple

Speaker 1 camo pants. Yeah, I like those.
Those are really nice. Yeah, Baltimore has an underrated dress-up fan base.
Uh-huh. They definitely are up there.

Speaker 1 I did a, when the PI happened, there was a Ravens fan who had like a Raven. It was like half Orioles, half Ravens avatar.
And he just replied, that wasn't PI.

Speaker 1 And it's so mean, but I just retweet those people because then he had like 100 responses. Just people.

Speaker 1 Interesting him. Yeah, right.
don't, it's such a passive way to do it, but it's so funny to me. I learned something about the Raven's logo today, yeah.

Speaker 1 You know how we learned the Louisville bird doesn't have teeth, or birds don't have teeth, but the Louisville Cardinal does.

Speaker 1 The Raven has a red eye, the Raven's stoned all the time, or has pink-eyed Bob Costas. Yeah, or it's been eating some assholes, yeah, been sleeping on a farted pillow.

Speaker 1 Yeah, we're not sure which one, but yeah, the Raven definitely has conjunctivitis or has been smoking some loud.

Speaker 1 Uh, so the Deshaun Watson stack going around that everyone's like, oh, this is his first loss loss by more than one score since high school.

Speaker 1 Are we not counting that he lost 21-7 to the Colts last year in the playoffs? And looked, that was a really bad game? Regular season. Yeah, I know, but I hate that shit.

Speaker 1 That's on Scott Hanson. And I'm.

Speaker 1 Don't, don't. I know what you're going to say, and don't do it.

Speaker 1 You're going to hate on the red zone because

Speaker 1 you think it's schizophrenic, and it's not like sitting down watching an actual movie football. But let me tell you, as a Redskins fan, that is the perfect distraction.
I can't sit down and watch.

Speaker 1 It's always been like that.

Speaker 1 I know, but here's the difference, Hank.

Speaker 1 I was starting to get annoyed with Red Zone, but with the fact that we have DirecTV here and you can come in and watch all the games and they're like telecast, Red Zone fucks your brain up.

Speaker 1 We all have like, there's going to be a

Speaker 1 study in 50 years how really the Mike Greenberg death of football. No, it wasn't concussions.

Speaker 1 It was the fact that whenever they switch to another game, you automatically expect a touchdown and whoops, it's only like a five-yard run.

Speaker 1 Well, for my brain, it is tougher to follow along all the games.

Speaker 1 Like when I go to, when it cuts to like the Patriots game, or that's probably a bad example because it was the afternoon, but when it cuts to like the Panthers-Falcons game and it shows a touchdown there, I immediately forget what was just happening in the Ravens-Texans game.

Speaker 1 So it's harder to follow along the game. But these are, here's why your take is bad, Vig.
It's called red zone. It's called red zone.
I know, but

Speaker 1 Scott Hanson will do a fucking middle-of-the-field zone where it's like a five-yard pass. You're like, wait, this guy didn't break a touchdown?

Speaker 1 And then he'll be like, we don't show punts, and he'll get off the punts.

Speaker 1 But the thing is, the setup you're describing is better, but not everyone can be so lucky to have six big-screen televisions where they can watch everybody. Oh, I have three TVs at home.

Speaker 1 Hank does too. You can do that.
Anyone could do that.

Speaker 1 Actually, one of my TVs went out. It's been tough.
What happened? I don't know. Just

Speaker 1 dark. I don't know.
It's just not turned on. Are you going to

Speaker 1 turn on? I pressed the button. Have you tried unplugging it, plugging it back in? Oh, fuck, man.
Yeah. That's horrible.
I know. I'm sorry.
That should have been your fire fest.

Speaker 1 I would have been a lot nicer to you today. That's all.
That should have been your Fire Fest. Fuck.
It's my future Fire Fest. It happened this weekend.
Stay tuned. When did it happen?

Speaker 1 Yeah, Friday. I got home Friday.
Oh, my God. Got ready for three TVs.
Only had two. That's nightmare.
That's sucks. That's a nightmare.
Awful. That is a nightmare.

Speaker 1 He had to use only two TVs all weekend. Thoughts and prayers.
Like, I can't.

Speaker 1 I shudder thinking about it. What I would do if I only was down to two TVs.
That's fucking horrible. But yeah, Red Zone is just too much.

Speaker 1 Your brain is melting out of your ears when you watch Red Zone, and you expect things to happen on every single play, and it doesn't because that's not how football works. Well,

Speaker 1 I understand.

Speaker 1 I'm not.

Speaker 1 I treasure my Sundays with the Red Zone channel, Big Catch. I'm not bashing it.

Speaker 1 My TV says, do you want to bashing Monday next?

Speaker 1 No, I'm not. No, I'm not.
Are you on the

Speaker 1 same football easy? I like to watch actual games. Two weeks ago, you're like, this is a good thing.

Speaker 1 I like to watch the actual games. I'm a football purist, if anything.
I like to feel the flow of the game. I like to

Speaker 1 fucking get in bed with it and lay down with it. Even if you're going to be like, I'm ready for a football season.
I want to see the two-yard runs in their raw state.

Speaker 1 I don't want to get a two-yard run and feel like it's going to be a touchdown. The red zone is football porn, and then watching five games at the same time, that's like football

Speaker 1 tantric sex

Speaker 1 with five different people. Thank you.
So that's a

Speaker 1 red zone will make you nut in 10 seconds. Yes.
And that's bad. And that's bad.
When you get addicted to porn, you're like, oh, fuck.

Speaker 1 There's a stiff wind will make me fucking cough. There's a time and a place for all.

Speaker 1 That is what I'm saying. And then tuning in and randomly coming across the Iron Eagle Dan Faust game in its entirety, that's like putting Roman swipes on, and you're not going to nut.

Speaker 1 I just wish I could have it all in one box every game in that feat. And just feel it.
Whatever. All right.
I digress. All right.
Cardinals, 49ers.

Speaker 1 Hank, you think the 49ers are frauds. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Why?

Speaker 1 I think they're overrated. I don't think they're frauds.
I think they're overrated. I think they're going to have some troubles in the playoffs.
Jimmy G has yet to prove himself to me.

Speaker 1 Ooh, I think he proved himself today. Against the Cardinals? Yeah, because the Cardinals were like, hey, you have to.

Speaker 1 Well, it was a short week, and the Cardinals basically said you have to beat us with the pass, and he did. He didn't have his best player either.

Speaker 1 Here's what I'll say about Emmanuel Sanders got hurt, too. 49ers.
I will determine whether or not they are frauds.

Speaker 1 They remind me very much of like the Texans, Deshaun Watson last year, where they have all the hype. First round of the playoffs, have an ugly loss.
I see that happening with the 49ers.

Speaker 1 The defense is pretty good on the 49ers, though. You have to admit, they're front four.
They can get after basically any quarterback. I thought

Speaker 1 that was the situation that happened at the end of the Seahawks game. I see that happening in a playoff game.

Speaker 1 See, I thought today's game was actually pretty impressive, even though it was a close game. Shout out that last play where that should be illegal.
It was bad.

Speaker 1 That was bad. Everyone went to a push.
Their fucking offensive lineman fell on the ball and threw it backwards. Threw it backwards.
Thoughts and prayers, by the way, to Caesar Sportsbook.

Speaker 1 They took a bath on that because that last second touchdown. They recovered.
They lost millions of dollars on that. So everyone think about the bookmakers in Las Vegas at this trying time.

Speaker 1 That was tough.

Speaker 1 But I thought this win for the 49ers was very impressive because it's a short week off of very, you know, like emotional loss.

Speaker 1 They got a bunch of guys injured, and they had to come back, and they, you know, like they won the game in impressive fashion. I don't know.

Speaker 1 I think this is one of those weeks where a bad team or a fraud team stumbles in this game, and they kind of like

Speaker 1 got up off the mat and the bell rang, and they were ready to go. Richard Sherman did say that that pass interference went against him because the NFL doesn't like him.
Really?

Speaker 1 Because he's active on the NFL Players Association board. So they're saying that's why that one was was a return.

Speaker 1 Richard Sherman is undefeated at finding a reason for a chip to be on his shoulder. That's what I kind of like him.

Speaker 1 I kind of like, I mean, the whole, like, I'm going to make up a phantom handshake that didn't happen with Baker Mayfield. It's crazy.
It's insane.

Speaker 1 It's the behavior of an insane person, but you need players like that. Yes.
The other thing I wrote down was Debo Samuel, who was graded at South Carolina,

Speaker 1 best name in the NFL in terms of wide receivers. Yeah, Debo's pretty good.
Debo Samuel. Like, every time he gets them.
Hollywood Brown. Hollywood Brown, but Debo's actually his main.

Speaker 1 Debo would be a good, like, fullback or wine. I don't know.
Debo at wide receivers. He plays like aggressive.

Speaker 1 I don't know. Debo Samuel, whenever he catches the ball, I'm like, oh, there's that guy.
Yeah. He's a dude.

Speaker 1 I had something else in this game. Oh, yeah.
They keep cutting up to George Kittle in the booth.

Speaker 1 They just show his. He's the Jerry Jones of the San Francisco 49ers.

Speaker 1 Whenever the offense does something good, they just show him, and he's up there just totally zooted out of his brain on bang energy and grizzly and just like banging on the wall be like fuck yeah fuck yeah

Speaker 1 it's great i mean he's just ready to go do you think his dad writes his letter to him when he doesn't play no definitely not okay definitely not great stuff you don't play you don't get a letter yeah um okay let's do uh we have two games left pft you want to do a quick ad yeah i do i want to talk to you about peloton i love my peloton bike i use it several times a week and if you're worried about finding the perfect gift this holiday peloton is the gift that they're guaranteed to love give your loved ones what they really want.

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Okay, we have two games left. Um, first up, we have Bengals Raiders.

Speaker 1 Uh, I mentioned earlier when I was getting very upset about the Bears, Max Crosby spelled with two X's, had four sacks.

Speaker 1 Eastern Michigan. He's our new guy.

Speaker 1 I like this guy. Okay.
I don't, I mean, Max Crosby, no, Max Crosby. Yeah.
I mean, well, why not?

Speaker 1 And this game stunk, but the good news is, if you're the Raiders, you're saying is literally just win, baby, so you can win bad and just be like, yeah, just win baby. Yeah, we won.

Speaker 1 You play to win the game. Yeah, just win baby.
I do like that. I think we should definitely call Max Dosakis.
Yes. Right? Dosakise, always a good draft pick.
There you go.

Speaker 1 No free ads, but that's a free ad for him. That is a good one, yeah.

Speaker 1 Ryan Finley, quarterback of the Bengals.

Speaker 1 Not the guy. Not the guy.
But he is a guy who loves getting on the phone on the sidelines.

Speaker 1 So, like, he loves doing something so egregious, just fucking up as bad as you can fuck up and sitting on the bench and then getting on the phone.

Speaker 1 They're like, yeah, we're looking at the satellite image of the last play right now. You fucked up again.
And Ryan's like, yeah, I fucked that one up.

Speaker 1 I actually think the Bengals could have won this game with Andy Dalton.

Speaker 1 You're probably not wrong. I mean, the Bengals have admitted that Andy Dalton is a better quarterback, but they're like, We're just not going to play him right now.

Speaker 1 I'm so sick of the Bengals, though, because

Speaker 1 they just won't figure out whether they want to be truly awful or not. Like, there's some games where they get blown out, and then there's games like today where they keep it close.

Speaker 1 And I need you to be consistent so I can consistently bet on it. You won't do it for me.

Speaker 1 You want to have a fun stat here? Yeah. Joe Mixon had the first Bengals rushing TD by someone not named Andy Dalton this year.
Yeah, it's crazy, isn't it? That's nuts.

Speaker 1 They didn't have a running back score touchdown. That's nuts.
That is insane. And I thought that Joe Mixon hadn't been that bad this year.
Maybe I was wrong. Maybe he has been that bad.

Speaker 1 My other fun stat is there's a guy that's been living on his roof until the Bengals win a game since, what, like September? Yeah. So he's just a roof guy.
I think that that was...

Speaker 1 He made that bet because he secretly wanted to live on his roof because it's pretty cool to live on your roof. Yes.
That's where all the action happens. Yeah.

Speaker 1 So he's like, yeah, I'm going to stay up here until we win a game. Like a little clubhouse.
Until my own, yeah. And there was like a local news story about him.
It says, man still on roof.

Speaker 1 There you go, buddy. Yeah.
He, the Bengals fans, it was nice. It felt like Raiders fans embraced Bengals fans that showed up and put on their paper bags and just felt shitty.

Speaker 1 And it was like, there was, I just love Raiders games in Oakland. The shots of the crowd and the people like dressed up.

Speaker 1 And then you just had, you threw in, like, there was some Bengals fan drinking with a paper bag. He was drinking through the paper bag.
It was just so sad, but so good at the same time.

Speaker 1 Like, it felt like Raiders fans probably showed him a good time. Yeah, no, that's definitely stealing valor from every homeless person that's ever lived.
It's just chugging one through the paper.

Speaker 1 Yeah. I like Bengals fans for the most part.
They're very colorful.

Speaker 1 Maybe it's just the uniforms and the stripes and the bright orange. That's literally it.
It looks pretty cool. That's all it is.
Bengals fans are non-threatening.

Speaker 1 I've never been intimidated by a Bengals fan or their team. The least threatening apex predator is a Bengal.
Yes. Like a drugged, you're like a drugged tiger.

Speaker 1 You're like a tiger on Quelludes that's speeding away from his wife after she's busted out the back door of his Buick. Yeah, exactly.
Declawed. Yes.
Declawed. Okay, last game.
Patriots Eagles.

Speaker 1 Hank,

Speaker 1 give us... Well, first of all, good win for the Patriots.
Their defense was awesome in the second half.

Speaker 1 Give us your worry level, though, of the Patriots' offensive line and Tom Brady basically having to run for his life constantly.

Speaker 1 There was actually a quote after he said that he was like tired, legit tired, because he basically has no time. Yeah, it's not great.
I mean, they were running like the Mitch Trubisky

Speaker 1 because they have no time, they couldn't throw the ball more than like five yards. It was just all screens, quick, quick routes.
It wasn't great. Looked ugly.
Disgusting game.

Speaker 1 Based off of the loss to the Ravens and obviously how the Ravens have been playing since that game, they look clearly like the superior team.

Speaker 1 But it was a good win, and they're still in the lead for home field advantage for the playoffs. That's all you can do.
Edelman might be your quarterback of the future. Yeah.

Speaker 1 You got Edelman and Sunu, probably the two best non-quarterback quarterbacks in the history of the NFL. Yes, yeah, that's true.
What about your defense? You still happy with the D? Mm-hmm.

Speaker 1 Turnover luck? How are you feeling about that? On your side? I've never really understood turnover luck.

Speaker 1 We had some good bounces, some bad bounces. I actually said that to PFT.
We were laughing when you were.

Speaker 1 It's Big Hat's favorite joke on the 3TAX. It's like a turnover luck.
Yeah, I think, Hank, that means that's turnover luck. Well, the ball was

Speaker 1 kickers.

Speaker 1 Well, no, because I still. But it wasn't a turnover.

Speaker 1 There was no turnover that happened. Right, but that's what turnover luck is, like, that's a ball that you can.
But Hank, you have turnover luck if a turnover doesn't happen.

Speaker 1 Again, because it would have been a turnover had the ball pounced your way, but it didn't because you're unlucky.

Speaker 1 It doesn't have to be a turnover to have like be like, that's turnover luck when the ball doesn't bounce your way, when it could.

Speaker 1 So, like, Hank, when your team is. You still don't understand.
You still think I'm saying that the Patriots are lucky. No.
Yeah, you do. You're just pointing out turnovers.
Definitely.

Speaker 1 Right, but you can't predict which way the ball is going to bounce. And sometimes just because it doesn't bounce your way doesn't mean you weren't lucky.
It's hard to predict.

Speaker 1 You can't say this game, we're always going to get this many turnovers.

Speaker 1 I never said you could. Okay.

Speaker 1 Hank starts talking turnover. Hank starts talking more and more like Bill Belichick

Speaker 1 as we kind of like dig in on him. But he does reach a breaking point every time we start to dig in where he snaps out of his, it was a good game.
We were lucky to escape with it.

Speaker 1 Where he's like, just shut the fuck up, guys. Shut up.
Shut up. Shut up.

Speaker 1 Here's a quote. Oh, can you give us the Bill Belichick quote again?

Speaker 1 Oh, he said they were having fun. Yeah, we're having fun.
Oh, they asked him about the Eagles, and he was like,

Speaker 1 you know, they look like they're having fun out there. Which is a shout out to Lane Johnson quote on our show saying that it's more fun to play for the Eagles than it is to play.

Speaker 1 That's so funny because that was, was, what, two years ago? Yeah. And he doesn't forget.

Speaker 1 But he also misquoted him. Oh, yeah.
Because the quote wasn't necessarily that bad. Yes.
So

Speaker 1 he wasn't quoting him. He was just noting that the Eagles look like they were having a fun time on the other side.
Oh, they were losing, yeah. Fun time.

Speaker 1 I've noticed that the weirder the combination of clothes that Bill Belichick wears, the more likely they are to win that game. So today.
90% coming off a buy. Yeah.

Speaker 1 90%. Yeah.
Yeah. I think we ran through that on

Speaker 1 Friday. So yeah, so we took the number.

Speaker 1 Belichick was wearing the sweatshirt that was cut off, but also had a cut, just a small cut down the middle, like he was going to tear it off at any given time during the game, like Hulk Hogan. Yeah.

Speaker 1 I don't know what the meaning of that little cut at the front of the collar was on him today. Just give yourself a little air.
Yeah, just let the neck breathe for a little bit. Let's get a little air.

Speaker 1 Stephon Gilmore, after the game, said that he knew he could get Ertz rattled because he had seen the Eagle tight end crying on Phil. That's tough.
Yeah. Yikes.
That's tough.

Speaker 1 Tough for Julie Ertz's

Speaker 1 husband. Yeah, Julie's husband.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 But yeah, so, and then the only other thing from this game is, do you think, how many times do you think, fuck Nelson Aguilar is going to be said tomorrow in the city of Philadelphia?

Speaker 1 That was a tough catch. It was a very tough catch, but he's also the guy who everyone blames, and it went viral when the other guy said it.
And I feel like

Speaker 1 you always need someone to blame, and he's the guy.

Speaker 1 There's going to be somebody, like a die-hard Eagles fan, that starts his own house fire just so that he can get interviewed by somebody on the news to say something about

Speaker 1 Nelson Aguilar. Yeah, run it back real quick.

Speaker 1 I did notice Gronk says that he's got a big announcement to make this week. Oh, yeah.
Hank, did you see that? Oh, yeah. What do you think that news is going to be? Probably some type of sponsorship.

Speaker 1 Probably like CBD, maybe a gambling company.

Speaker 1 I can see Gronk being the first person to actually take Cam Soda up on an offer. Yeah.
To be like, hey, Gronk, we've made you a PR stunt offer to jack off in front of a camera for 24 hours non-stop.

Speaker 1 End of the day. Don't on the pregame Sean Fox is also electric.
Oh, it's so electric. An absolute train wreck electricity.

Speaker 1 So end of the day, Patriots are still

Speaker 1 probably the team you're most confident in the AFC besides the Ravens. And then I would say just knowing who they are, they're the team you're most confident in, period.

Speaker 1 Their defense is awesome, but their offensive line's got problems. Yeah.
Big time problems. I think they'll figure it out.
We'll see. They'll figure it out.

Speaker 1 It's also tough when they don't have, it feels like they're missing. Oh, my boy, Marshall Newhouse.

Speaker 1 There you go. He's going to get it together.

Speaker 1 I know he is. It's tough when we were watching the game and Julian Edelman's running all the way down the field.

Speaker 1 Julian Edelman's fantastic, but if he's your deep threat, it feels like it's not balanced. Yeah, Nikhil's out, though.
Nikhil was playing today. Yep.
Such a great name. Nikhil O'Neal.
Nikhil O'Neal.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 Would he have like three catches? Nikhil Harry. Something like that.
Nikhil Harry. Yeah, I know.
He's a great last name, too. What did you think? No, I don't know.

Speaker 1 I don't know why you're saying Nikhil O'Neill. Because it's like Shaquille O'Neill.

Speaker 1 Got it. So

Speaker 1 nickname. That's what we do on the show.
We come up with nicknames.

Speaker 1 All right, let's do who's back and then we will finish up with a Monday reading. PFT, do you have a couple ads real quick?

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ZipRecruiter, the smartest way to hire. Okay, we're going to do something a little different this week.

Speaker 1 We're going to have football guys be a poll on Twitter, and we're going to have you can read about who we have nominated on Twitter, and I think Jake will blog it. So check that out at Pardon My Take.

Speaker 1 Let's do who's back in our Monday reading. By the way, we should just quickly say

Speaker 1 I also want to run a poll of anti-football guys this week, and that includes Peter King for saying everyone write in and tell me how Miles Garrett

Speaker 1 is going to affect whether you'll let your son play football. Yep.
And Adam Schefter, who... Assault.
Assault! That's how I figured he said that. Assault.
And Peter King, by the way, just saying,

Speaker 1 he said

Speaker 1 an act not seen in decades requires discipline not seen in decades, particularly in these times.

Speaker 1 Shut up. Peter, have you seen The Last Boy Scout? There was a guy bleeding from his ear.
Shut up, Peter King.

Speaker 1 Stupid. It's not as bad as going into a hotel shower and realizing that the drain is still plugged plugged and you have to lean over and flip it up, but it's pretty bad.

Speaker 1 The people who've like unimaginable. Yeah, unimaginable.
Incomprehensible. Unthinkable.
Unthinkable and unimaginable. That's what Shefty said.
These people are just losers.

Speaker 1 I've also seen like five guys get a helmet swung at them this year. Yes.
It happens a lot. You've seen way worse things happen on football.
It wasn't in prime time, and it wasn't...

Speaker 1 to someone with such a giant gravitational target as Mason Ramsey had.

Speaker 1 I mean, Mason Rudolph had. Okay.
Yeah, don't hit Mason Ramsey. No.

Speaker 1 Happy birthday. Yeah, happy birthday, Mason.
But yeah, it was ridiculous to see all the takes that were coming. It was crazy.
All right, who's back? Hank, you start.

Speaker 1 My who's back is the Motorola Razor. Yeah.

Speaker 1 So I saw a commercial for this this weekend. I personally had it, it was like the first phone I had.
Even when my friends were starting to get iPhones, I had a Motorola Razor.

Speaker 1 It was like by the time I had it, it was old.

Speaker 1 But I had it for like three years, bunch of nostalgia. They're bringing it back but it's like apparently gonna be a smartphone so it's gonna be like the new like hipster

Speaker 1 I don't even know I don't know if it's gonna work out or not but the motor Motorola razor is back wait so it it's gonna have everything like iPhone has it's gonna be a flip phone but yeah but you can flip it up and it basically turns into like a one-screen iPhone that sounds to me like it's gonna get broken immediately so it can be a flip phone or a touchscreen like the iPhone should make a flip phone Mm-hmm because the only I would buy one but then you'd be the green dot and you can't do that well the cool thing about a flip phone is you can rock it on your belt and let everyone know that you work in IT.

Speaker 1 That's true. It is pretty sweet.
It's like, hey, what's up?

Speaker 1 If the new Motorola Razor has Snake on it, then I'm... That's what I'm saying.
No, that was Snokey. It was Tetris.
No, Snake and

Speaker 1 Snoki. That was a little brick.
Blackberry. That's what I had.
Yeah. Snake.
Snoki. No, BlackBerry had

Speaker 1 Brickbreaker. Brickbreaker was awesome.
I wasted so much time at a job that I was getting paid for to play Brickbreaker.

Speaker 1 If you bring back a phone that has Snake, Brickbreaker, and Drug Wars on it, then I am so far in. Snake is so good.
Just Tetris. Tetris on the Razor was the best.

Speaker 1 Someone make Game Boys again.

Speaker 1 My Who's Back of the Week is Shorts. Ooh.

Speaker 1 Yeah, because

Speaker 1 the Winnipeg Blue Bombers family. Oh, yeah.

Speaker 1 They won. They're going to the CFL Gray Cup final.

Speaker 1 And if they win, that dude gets to put on his first pair of pants in 19 years. That's crazy.

Speaker 1 He promised his buddies he's not wearing pants until they win the big one, the Gray Cup, and they are one week away from potentially doing that. We're going to try to get them on.

Speaker 1 Yeah, if you know the shorts guy, possibly the biggest shorts guy in the world, I had a drunk idea this weekend. Yeah.
Shorts that are warm. Like shorts you can wear during cold weather.

Speaker 1 Do they have like warmers in them? No, I haven't figured it all out yet, but just I want to be able to wear shorts when it's cold outside and not be cold if there's a way to do that.

Speaker 1 There is. Get fat.
Get short. And also, you just get the shorts, but make them a little bit longer.
Okay. To your ankle.
At what point do they become

Speaker 1 no? If you just pull it, it's a state of mind. Yeah.
Just sell your shorts. If there's no cuff at the bottom,

Speaker 1 giant shorts. Shorts.
They're shorts for giants. Yeah, huge shorts.
But you get to wear them. Yeah.
Yeah. Okay, that works.
Or just like if you could make, I don't know, NASA, figure it out.

Speaker 1 Like, use some sort of heat retention fabric and keep my legs warm from the kneecap up. Yeah.
I don't know. Figure Figure it out.
It's not that hard.

Speaker 1 All right, my who's back is Christmas lights or holiday lights in bars. I love that.
There's something about going into a bar and having the holiday lights in there. It just feels better.

Speaker 1 Feels more like nicer to drink. Even better when it's in like August.
Yeah. But this is like the time where you go into a bar, you want to buy everyone else a drink.

Speaker 1 It's the spirit. It feels warmer.
Yeah, it does. It reminds me of that scene in Goodfellas where they walk in after the Tonza heist and everyone's

Speaker 1 in there. It feels warm in there.
You come in from the cold, and they come in, and there's lights all over the place, and everyone's happy to see each other.

Speaker 1 And I mean, December is like the ultimate drinking month where you can just socially drink all the time.

Speaker 1 And so we're about to get there with Thanksgiving. And then my other who's back is Jim Harbaugh.
Jim Harbaugh's all the way back. He is big time.
He fucking stepped on Michigan State's throat.

Speaker 1 And did you see the game ball off? No. Oh, my God.

Speaker 1 So Harbaugh, after

Speaker 1 the last play, before Shea Patterson, because Shea

Speaker 1 Patterson was his best game as a Michigan quarterback, before he kneeled the ball to end the game, Harbaugh told him, make sure you don't give that ball back to the refs because I want to give it to you as a game ball.

Speaker 1 And then when they went into the locker room, Shea Patterson gave it to Harbaugh as a game ball. And then Harbaugh put it in Shea Patterson's backpack before he left without him realizing.

Speaker 1 So it was a game ball off. He snuck it off.
They just kept on giving it back and forth to each other.

Speaker 1 That's going to end up being one of those lifelong friendship things that you hear hear about where two friends prank each other over the course of their lives by sneaking one little trinket bag. Yep.

Speaker 1 Harbaugh is going to be 80 years old and like roll out of bed, go to his computer to type in his shopping list in Excel, and like underneath his desk is going to be that damn football.

Speaker 1 He's like, shit, shit. You got me.
You got me. I'm going to say something that's probably going to elicit some people being mad at me.

Speaker 1 I think Michigan beat Ohio State.

Speaker 1 Really? I do. I think.
You're going to get a lot of people mad at at you. I think Michigan can beat Ohio State.
I'm not going to say they are going to beat Ohio State. I'm not going to guarantee it.

Speaker 1 I think it's going to be a more competitive game than people thought

Speaker 1 a month ago. That's going to be the northern equivalent of Cocho beating Alabama.
I mean, it would be.

Speaker 1 Do you think Harbaugh cries if he wins that game? Probably yes. Yeah.
Harbaugh would. I mean, it would be.
And then he would immediately parade himself. Because then

Speaker 1 he would have gone 3-0 against his rivals, Michigan State, Notre Dame, and Ohio State.

Speaker 1 Again, I don't, I'm not going to, I'll have to wait to see the line, and I'm not saying like, oh, I'm guaranteeing.

Speaker 1 I just think it's going to be a lot tougher of a game for Ohio State than people thought, like after Wisconsin

Speaker 1 or anytime before Michigan played Penn State, they turned a corner in that second half when Harbaugh told them this will be your finest hour, even though second halves are like two and a half hours.

Speaker 1 But ever since that moment, they've been a different football team. Yeah.

Speaker 1 I mean, I would love to see that. I would love to see the look on Harbaugh's face.
It would be incredible. It would be incredible.
All right, let's finish up. We have

Speaker 1 a Monday reading. We haven't done one in a while.
This one comes

Speaker 1 from Reddit, and it says, My boyfriend of two years will not stop speaking in a fake Italian-American accent and keeps making up foreign words. All right, here we go.

Speaker 1 Okay, to preface this, I love my boyfriend, and he is super sweet, nice, smart guy that I feel lucky to have, but his behavior lately is freaking me out and makes me worried for the future I love how they always start with this

Speaker 1 I love him

Speaker 1 I love him but there's something so wrong with our relationship that I'm asking millions of anonymous strangers on Reddit yeah I love my boyfriend but he keeps insisting I have to go to Davin Buster's so what do I do all right so my boyfriend loves movies especially mob movies he has all the Soprano DVDs at his place and I'm pretty sure he still watches them that way that's fine obviously you can watch and enjoy whatever you want.

Speaker 1 But last week, he saw the Irishman with some friends, and since then, he will not stop talking in like a fake, stereotypical mobster accent.

Speaker 1 We were in an Uber the night after going out to dinner, and admittedly, the driver was going a little fast, but my boyfriend kept muttering things like, Who's this fucking guy, huh?

Speaker 1 Dale Earnhardt Jr. over here, and shouting, Ho,

Speaker 1 as we took corners. He would not shut up and even gave the driver a one-star review saying it was about respect.

Speaker 1 I fucking love that.

Speaker 1 This guy sounds like he's a smart guy. Dominic DiCoco.
Yeah, I'm riding here. Hey, hey, Nick DiCococo.
He didn't respect you, honey. Not in front of you.
Not in front of my guma.

Speaker 1 Everyone has their quirks. I get it.
And they can be what makes someone special. At first, it was even kind of cute, funny, but I just can't really understand this shift all of a sudden.

Speaker 1 It's been a week, and he continues to make asides in his voice. And when he gets drunk, he speaks in made-up Italian.

Speaker 1 Like we were having dessert at my sister's, and he came up to me and said, Hey, ma, I gotta get home and hit the drapini.

Speaker 1 Okay, I'm the DD, I don't drink, so I asked him why he wants to leave and what a drapini is. His response was, you know, like a shower.

Speaker 1 That's a great term for a drapini.

Speaker 1 I'm gonna start calling the shower the Drapini for the first time. Let me get a quick

Speaker 1 Drapini. I got to get in the Drapini.
You got to take a Soppini, you know? Drappini is a fucking... This guy is funny.
I like this guy. Drapini is not a word.
Well, it is now.

Speaker 1 In any language. He also never called me Ma before, ever.
And now he does it almost all the time. I feel crazy like this is going to be a permanent feature of his personality now.

Speaker 1 I know this sounds incredibly stupid compared to some of the other issues on here, but I'm just really nervous about what this means about his personality slash mental health he really is a sweet loving guy with a wonderful family and have a lot in common but just like i don't even know how to begin to approach this i want to tell him off and be like why did why do you keep doing this voice can you please stop we don't live together so thankfully it's not constant thing but like what if we did and it was

Speaker 1 come on i need to know first hey come on hey we're just having a laugh i i need to know what this guy's actual heritage is well okay so here we go uh is this the the kind of thing you just deal with when it's someone you love?

Speaker 1 Edit, I just want to add that he's not Italian at all either. So I'm also worried people will get offended when we're out or something.
Hey, the drappini. Hey, come on.
Hey, oh.

Speaker 1 Hey, it's just good, clean fun. Let's just having a laugh.
Listen, if you haven't done this at some point in your life, I don't, like, you're not a human being.

Speaker 1 Like, you watch Sopranos, you watch Goodfellas, you talk with your hands a little bit, you kind of think your life's a movie. It happens for a couple weeks, and then it passes.

Speaker 1 hank started wearing track suits when he watched sopranos i've been watching a lot of peaky blinders lately too you yeah you're a scalli cap not a scalli it's more the accent you don't yeah with peaky blinders for me i watch and whiskey i want to drink yeah i want to drink whiskey and i want to smoke cigarettes non-stop yeah it's so hard not to yeah and do and do some like uh chopped up heroin from asia or no uh

Speaker 1 no arthur has uh cocaine to dish off of shelby yeah yeah not yet don't even fucking start it's the devil's woman

Speaker 1 but it's uh then he gets he gets married to that like Christian girl that won't let him go anywhere and do anything, and he's like,

Speaker 1 I want it on the record. I'm not doing it.
Okay, I won't do it.

Speaker 1 I'm not doing it, I'm not gonna go any further. But yes, you do get into modes when you watch shows, when you watch TV, when you watch movies, you want to emulate your heroes.

Speaker 1 The good thing is, Hank, can I tell you something real quick? No,

Speaker 1 peaky blinders too late in the morning for this for these jokes. No, it's not a joke.
Peaky Blinders, the seasons come out so infrequently. Like, I haven't watched the most recent season yet.

Speaker 1 I can't remember a thing that's happened in the past. Yeah.
Like, not even one thing. I need to refresh, of course.
So you're good.

Speaker 1 But yeah, you get in these modes and you emulate, you know, hey, Drapini. And it's also fun.
Yeah. If you don't have an accent, if you grow up speaking without any noticeable.

Speaker 1 Yeah, if you have like a newscaster voice, it's fun to put, it's like putting on a Halloween costume for your voice. Right.
It's cool. Right.
So let him let the drapini.

Speaker 1 It sounds like he's trying to bring a little class to the relationship. Hey, Ma, why don't you go in the drapini when he's eating the drapini? A little this, a little bada boom.

Speaker 1 We go in the drapini, we have some fun. I don't know.
Maybe nine months later, we got a little, we got a little grease ball running around.

Speaker 1 All right, we'll see everyone Wednesday. Uh, enjoy Monday Night Football and fire every coach in America.
Love you guys. Hey, I fucking love you guys, all right?

Speaker 1 No bullshit.

Speaker 1 Here we go.

Speaker 1 And

Speaker 1 he's down

Speaker 1 right foot, left foot goal.

Speaker 1 Let's see kick both feet in right here at the end, Jim.

Speaker 1 Oh

Speaker 1 wow,

Speaker 1 not the catch, catch you'll see.

Speaker 1 It's been eggin' not now.

Speaker 1 Wow.