Actor Gary Busey, Baker Party Line + Guys on Chicks With Uncle Chaps

Actor Gary Busey, Baker Party Line + Guys on Chicks With Uncle Chaps

October 09, 2019 1h 48m Explicit

Monday Night Football was a mess for the Browns and we sort through handshake gate and Baker expectations going forward. (2:56-15:11) Jay Gruden gets fired at 530 am. (15:12-19:48) Baseball playoffs and who has earned their pinstripes. (19:49-26:46) Hot Seat/Cool Throne with a special guest. (26:47-36:50) Actor Gary Busey joins the show to talk about his career, Buseyisms, life lessons and a WHOLE lot more. (39:42-1:14:57) Segments include PR 101 for the NBA, (1:19:20-1:22:03) PMT Sports Biz Minute,(1:22:04-1:23:05) Take Quake for the Penn State letter,(1:23:06-1:27:17) and Guys on Chicks with Uncle Chaps (1:27:18-1:46:18)


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Full Transcript

Hey, Pardon My Take listeners.

You can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music.
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I'm already just doing Busey things. Yeah.
He has me so twisted that I don't really know how to describe the interview. You're going to feel like you did a drug after listening.
It's awesome. Not a bad one either.
A really good one. Yes.
It's an awesome interview. We have some Monday Night Football cleanup, some baseball talk, hot seat, seat cool throne and we have our uncle chaps here for guys on chicks before we get to all that part we're gonna get right back to the show the last thing you want to hear when you need your auto insurance most is a robot with countless irrelevant menu options which is why with usaa auto insurance you'll get great service that is easy and reliable all at the touch of a button.

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Alright, back to part of my take.

Okay, let's go.

Boys!

Boys!

Now in the street there is violence.

And I'm not allowed to stuff With work to be done No place to hang A low washing And then I can't name All on the sun Oh no We're gonna rock down to Electric Avenue And then we'll take it higher Oh we're gonna rock down to electric avenue welcome to part of my take presented by the cash app go download it right now use code barstool you get five dollars for free five dollars to aspca today is Wednesday, October 9th. Do we have a Baker Mayfield problem? Question mark? Yes.
The fact that he has not addressed the handshake controversy brought to light by Richard Sherman. I would say his silence speaks volumes.
Oh, boy. Was that a bad game for the Browns on Monday nights? They look like they are not ready for primetime, as they say.
And unfortunately, there's a ton of them. They're on primetime a lot.
Hope they get ready. I know Baker's probably taking a lot of heat today, and we are the preeminent Baker Mayfield podcast, the support group, the fan group.
I'll just say this. I think Baker himself would tell you he needs to play better.
There you go. That's the best way to do it.
Instead of criticizing someone, you're saying he would criticize. He'd be the first to say he played poorly on Monday night.
Baker is his own worst critic. So it doesn't matter how bad we trash him because he's going to say something worse about himself.
And we welcome that. And you know what? Even more than that, PFT, we wouldn't, as a Baker Mayfield podcast, we wouldn't point the finger at the atrocious offensive line or the fact that Freddie Kitchens looks like he's never seen a playbook in his life.
We wouldn't do that. No.
We say it starts and ends at the quarterback position, and we're going to get better. Their offensive line did look awful, and Freddie Kitchens looked worse, if we're being honest.
Yeah, no, the whole thing kitchens he looks outcoached he looks like he's underwater he looks confused he looks like he has never seen a blitz in his life russillo very not creative russillo has a phrase that he uses and i think it applies to freddy kitchens he's got coordinator face he's got coordinator bod he's got coordinator face he does not look like i don't know what maybe he needs to go. Maybe we need to bring back, remember, queer eye for the straight guy.
We need to bring that back, but it's just us making over football coaches that have coordinator face into head football coaches. Yeah.
So with Freddie, how would you start that out to get him to have a head coach face? The mustache might not be a bad idea. Maybe shave his head.
Put on a suit. Visor.
Go visor. Go visor.
Visor shaved head.

Fedora.

Yeah.

Maybe just put his face in a big bucket of ice for a while.

Get that thing a little thinner.

Is that how it works?

You know the Instagram models are pushing the face roller thing now.

Whatever it is.

It's like a, I don't even know what it is.

They just roll their faces.

They're like, look, I'm skinny now.

You know what?

Anytime a coach has a sunburn, they look like a head coach to me. Maybe we could just go hang out.
Like Mike Shanahan, he always at least appeared to be a head coach. Just get that sucker a little bit more tanned up.
It was not a good showing for the Browns offense. The defense still looked pretty good at times.
You want to say that? I think they had like 185 yards rushing on them. You know what I did there? Yeah.
I said at times. At times.
Also, that 83-yard running play took up most of that. And if the Browns had scored when they were going in, it was about to be a 14-10 game.
I was going to say the game's different if they don't drop that catch in the end zone. Baker put it where it needed to be.
But you're right. It doesn't.
It's not a great look. Here's.
Yeah. And the.
Here's the problem. For the Browns, I wanted to believe in the Browns, and I still think that they've got enough talent to be good, but this was always a question was Freddie Kitchens.
All right. So it's – well, it's a question of everything because I think the whole team hasn't really proved anything.
And Baker, you know, is – we love the outspoken guy. We love the guy who talks a lot of shit and, you know, is himself.
But when things go poorly, you have to expect the backlash. You have to expect the Nick Bosa doing the flag dance.
And you have to expect, you know, cow turd getting on his show and saying this all comes to the territory. I don't think it's I don't think it's unfair for people to pile on Baker right now.
He doesn't i yeah no you know what he deserves it he deserves it right now that doesn't mean he won't get you know back to what he was at the end of last year but at this very moment he deserves to be piled on because the browns talked a lot of shit and they were picked to win a lot of games and right now it's hard to see it now spin zone for cleveland the afc north stinks i don't i'm not a believer in the baltimore ravens i think this you know yeah we are believers in the pittsburgh steelers now because we found out that duck is an awl so that's just so everyone knows out there any any any athletes who are listening all you got to do is publicly say you're a fan of ours and we will never say a bad thing until you play poorly on Monday Night Football and you would say poor things about yourself right and then we'll just echo the things you would have said you know what we fucking have Baker's back on this yeah because we're backing up his own statements that he's probably thinking about himself at this right so so uh the the Steelers obviously one and four don't look. The Bengals are a dumpster fire.
That's going to be a division that you can win at what it feels like in week 16 or 17. I love that anything that happens in southern Ohio, nobody really knows what the fuck's going on.
Because right now all the talk about the shitty teams in the league, it's the Dolphins and it's the R-Words. And the Bengals are just coasting by.
Oh, I got my eyes no one's no one's really i said before the show i know so little about the team i don't know who the fuck is on the staff besides zach taylor even jeffrey dommer could be one of their assistants and i wouldn't know exactly which would make it even strange crazier that i wouldn't have found out about that like i don't know anything about what's going on with the Bengals. The Browns, you're right.
They still could turn it around.

It's not over.

Listen, we overreact so much, and I'm not here to overreact.

It's just what the Browns season feels like it's going to be,

it's going to just be this.

It's going to be the up and down.

When they win, they win, and it looks good.

When they beat the Ravens, they beat the Ravens.

When they lose, it's ugly.

When they lost to the Titans, that was ugly. When they lost to the Niners, that was ugly.
So I think that is just, if you're a Browns fan, and I don't have to tell you what it's going to be like because you know what it's going to be like, but it's up and down. That's mean.
At least there's hope. There's hope, and here's the thing.
There's also an element that a lot of the bad always feels worse when your team has that much hype. Also, the bad feels worse if you lay an egg in primetime.
Correct. If this was hidden in the mess of 10 games that we had on Sunday in the early slot, people would be like, yeah, they'd be questioning the Browns, but it wouldn't be this much of a focus on it.
And let me do an old broadcasting trick here. I think we need to actually give more credit to the 49ers.
Yes. Because the 49ers are a good football team.
The difference between Kyle Shanahan's offense and Freddie Kitchens was like they were playing two totally different games. It was like chess and then playing a game when you're in elementary school.
Eat the play-dough. Yeah, where you dare your friend to eat something nasty and then make fun of him behind his back.
Freddie Kitchens was finger painting and Kyle Shanahan was doing the Sistine Chapel. Right, yes.
He was composing music like Mozart. Right.
But what I'm getting at is the 49ers offense is a lot of fun to watch. Our guy, George Kittle, hit the ground.
It's fucking awesome. One cut and go.
It's fucking awesome. Back, baby.
It's back. I mean, the Shanahan offense, whether you're talking about Mike or Kyle, it's just comforting.
It's like a warm blanket. I got something for Kyle, though.
Put a little bend in your hat, man. Well, also, maybe you don't have a hat with the smallest logo ever.
It looked like it was printed. Tiny logo.
Like a JPEG was printed out right before the game started. I feel like they had a pre-season meeting with the MERS designers where they presented these, like, oh, Kyle, we know you're a cool guy.
And they presented all these cool, different alterations to the 49ers logo. This is the 49ers logo, but it's like a surfer style.
This is the 49ers logo, but it's super tiny and no one knows. It's like derelict.
It was minimalist. Yes.
Yeah, that's what it was. It was like you have to really search for the logo

and the giant flat brim looked like he

was in a posse of a BMX

bicyclist. Oh, they should do a minimalist

hat. Yeah, where it's like a

Mario coin. It's just a gold coin

the gold rush. I like that.
That's

good. That's deconstructed logos.

We should also talk about the handshake

gate. Yeah, it happened after the fact

this morning Richard Sherman publicly

accused Baker of not shaking

his hand at the pregame coin toss

Thank you. goes we should also talk about the handshake gate yeah what happened after the fact uh this morning richard sherman publicly accused baker of not shaking his hand at the pregame coin toss which is important we should add because baker famously kansas didn't shake his hand and he had to uh both fuck them on the field and off the field by grabbing his penis yes yes uh so he allegedly did not shake hands to richard sherman then we were treated to like nine different camera angles of the handshake actually happening way too much and then richard sherman was like no i was talking about after the coin toss because he didn't shake my hand a second time afterwards no the first time there were two handshakes there was one that happened before the coin toss and then afterwards one of the browns captains shook hands with somebody else on the 49ers but baker left before that second it's schrodinger's dap it was like i'm gonna i did i both dapped you and didn't dapp you at the same time this is so stupid this is the baker mayfield look what like i said when it's bad it's gonna look worse because of all the shit that was taught yes and i'm not giving up on Baker.
I don't want you to give up on Baker if you're listening to this and you're a Browns fan. People will give up on Baker, and that's fine because this is the fun narrative to have right now.
I totally understand it. Listen, if Baker Mayfield didn't come on our podcast, we admit our bias.
We'd probably be clowning him. Actually, I don't know because I always liked Baker.
Yeah. I don't think I'd be clowning him, but I would be saying all the same stuff about him,

not thinking I was just having his back by saying it. Right, right.

And he probably doesn't even listen, and he doesn't really care.

But more than anything, I'm saying this because I do think the overreaction to Baker sucking is a little severe.

If he had an offensive line and a competent head coach, I think he would look a little different, but he does have to play better. We'll put it this way.
He stinks, but he doesn't suck. Yet.
But he could still get back and not stink. There are people who are saying he sucks.
He doesn't suck. Yeah, he stinks right now.
Yeah, he stinks right now. Oh, he stinks right now.
Yes. If he puts together like four more games of this, then we start to use the S word.
But until then, we'll say that he stinks. Yeah.
Okay, fair fair i feel like negative two fantasy points is is hey you know what no one gives a shit about fantasy football no one cares hank name one person here that gives a shit about scoring a fancy football not me not me i care about one one score only and that's what happens on the game i settle my business on sunday on the field yeah i'm just, you gotta score. I mean, you gotta be a zero to be like

bad. Once you get in the negatives, that's

sucky territory. We don't say the

S word. He stinks.
No.

That's what I'm saying.

Mitch is really good. Yeah.
Mitch's also

has not taken away from your team yet.

That was a loaded question I just asked

you. That could have gone very badly for me.

Every single week. Our friend Booger has been

getting a lot of crap for his performance

in the booth. I like Booger.
Who?

McFarland. Who is giving him crap? You know more than one Booger? No, who's giving him crap? Just the internet in general.
I didn't see that. Oh, yeah.
Yeah. The internet is not happy with Booger.
Are you too deep? No, if you just name search Booger McFarland, he's getting a lot of shit right now. But I like the way that he reminds me that different lines on the field are analogous to having a 12th player.
So he was saying like the sideline is your 12th player. The back of the end zone, that's your 12th defender right there.
Freddie Kitchens not being able to run an offense, that's your 12th tackler right there. Yeah.
People are giving Booger shit? Yeah. I mean, I don't think Booger's like reinventing the wheel.
Booger's comforting. He's like a bowl of chicken soup.
He's not gonna enlighten you with anything, but he sounds like football. He's no Tony Romo.
I haven't heard Tony Romo this year. Is he playing too much golf? No, he's just...
I feel like he's not been on a late Sunday afternoon game yet. Right? The prime...
No, he was on the Chargers Broncos last week. He was.
But that was Packers Cowboys. So I'm actually good with Tony Romo right now.
Like, I'm at the right level of Tony Romo. I actually want to hear him this year because it has been so long.
It feels like they've stepped back. Because remember when he first came and it was just every single week? Thursday and Sunday.
Yeah. Oh, that's it.
Okay. Thank you, Hank.
I knew my brain had it somewhere. All right.
If you want to watch Barstool goal or Barstool or sorry, part of my take go to Barstool goal dot com slash PMT. We're doing it right now.
Live. Hi.
What's up? What's up? What's up? Before. Yeah.
Baseball. We got to talk about Jay Gruden.
Yeah. Fire at 530 a.m.
Yeah. What an insane move.
First of all, for Dan Snyder to call a meeting at 5 o'clock on a Monday morning.

Is that insane?

Because he's insane, so then everything he does is sane.

He was definitely still up.

Yeah.

He did not go to sleep, if you know what I'm talking about.

Why did Jay Gruden just say, why did he pick up his phone?

Why would anybody ever go into a 5 o'clock meeting ever for any reason?

Maybe he's just there because he's a football guy.

Whatsoever.

Yeah.

I said in my blog that I wrote yesterday, there are two things that can happen in that meeting one is you get fired which sucks two is you're in the office at 5 a.m and you're not fired which is worse i think then you have a whole rest of the day that's the worst is when you get into work early for any purpose and you get your job done and then you have to wait three more hours for somebody else to come in the office so you can continue working. But he just went home.
Well, yeah. Then he just went home afterwards and he's probably loaded somewhere just having the time of his life.
Why do you say that, man? Just because of those videos? Jay Gruden? Yeah. No, because that's what I would be doing.
Yeah, he's just hanging out. Maybe he's not drinking.
Actually, the first day I would pretend that I still had a job. I wouldn't tell my wife that I was fired yet if I was Jay.
And I'd like pack my suitcase and put on a suit like I was going into work. Because that's definitely what he wore.
And I'd just go to the library and hang out for a while. She'd be like, why are you wearing a suit? Yeah.
I'm going to work. I'm going to work, honey.
You know this. Yeah.
This is work. It's Tuesday.
But now we have the most dangerous apex predator in all of the animal kingdom out for blood. And that's Dan Snyder looking for a new head coach.
Yeah. And L reported earlier today that dan snyder's plane was in pittsburgh okay at the private airport with photo evidence um i'm 75 confident in that scoop isn't that tampering no because so he can trade he's trying to trade for mike tomlin ah and if you trade for a head coach which is i i think that's the most excitement that there can possibly be in the NFL with trades, is the very rare head coaching trade.
Why the fuck would Mike Tomlin want to go there? Oh, he wouldn't, but he traded. Yeah, yeah.
But I feel like the Steelers wouldn't do that to him. Well, a couple things.
He worked. Anytime you're putting together the pieces on a head coaching search, you always have to be like, oh, he worked with this guy back in the day and this is where he's from yeah so it checks two boxes because he worked with bruce allen when bruce allen was working in tampa bay he was an assistant coach down there and then he also went to school at william and mary which is like two hours away yep and he grew up in virginia part of virginia that now roots for the panthers but they used to root for the r-words got it.
So yeah, he's definitely going to definitely going to be there. Yeah.
It's a whole shit show. I don't know.
And this also, wouldn't you say it's a little premature for the Redskins because this is the last pop. The Redskins will get all year.
Like firing Jay Gruden was the last time. They'll be significant in the news.
I think you, you're underestimating Dan Snyder and his ability to fuck everything up to the point where it's newsworthy but that's your big that's your big huzzah like we got the monday morning story you know what i mean yeah because they weren't going to get it for any wins or anything so this i feel like if you were dan snyder just save that so you have something to look forward to i think he's going to drag this thing out and then callahan's probably going to win a couple games, by the way, fun fact of the day, he took over for John and Jay now. Took over for John in Oakland, went to the Super Bowl, lost to John when he was in Tampa Bay.
This is a serial Gruden cucker. Yes, he just goes in after the Gruden.
So, look out, if Callahan becomes the permanent head coach for the Redskins, then whoever Jay Gruden goes goes to they'll meet in the Super Bowl next year okay yeah I like that it took my brain a second to get there yes okay all right so lock it in our words are going to the Super Bowl next year yes exactly that's all I took away from that conversation but you're right if you're Mike Tomlin what would you offer the Steelers to be able to trade a head coach? Nothing, because it's the dumbest. Well, I guess the Redskins have to trade for a head coach because they will not get a real head coach.
They need somebody who's locked up under contract that they can't break. They need a hostage to be the head coach.
Right, because if they go to just the free agent market for head coaches, they will only get a head coach that is some young guy who's like you know what i'm probably never going to be head coach material so i'm just going to take this one and just cash the check and then i'll just go back to being a coordinator when i suck yep that's that's exactly where you're gonna because no no smart guy who's like i'm destined to be a head coach would take this job knowing how bad it is no smart guy would but with greg Shiano? Greg Sciano's going to take back Rutgers, man. Oh, that's right.
Yeah, leading them to prominence. Nunzio Campanelli.
He's a bridge. Yes, he's a bridge.
All right, let's talk a little baseball. So we got Nats-Dodgers game five on Wednesday.
Natitude is back. Yeah, Natitude is back.
We had the Twins need to just stop. I feel bad for them.
I really do. They have lost, was it 15 straight postseason games? All of Minnesota is like, they're borderline the most cursed sports city of all time.
I've said that. They are low-key the saddest sports city when you actually like, people always go to Cleveland or Buffalo Buffalo it's Atlanta and Minnesota have that under the radar because they have all four all four major teams and they had cursed they had Kevin Garnett in his prime they had one of the best teams of all time this sounds really mean to just say this a lot one of the best teams of all time to not win a Super Bowl with the Randy Moss Chris Carter and Dante Culpepper or no it was, it wasn't Dante yet, but it was Randy Moss, Chris Carter, Randall Cunningham.
They lost to Atlanta in the NFC Championship game. Battle of the Anderson Kickers.
15-1. They were 0-4 in the Super Bowl.
They did have Kirby Puckett in the early 90s. But yeah, and then they got their hockey team stolen stolen their state of hockey.
That's right. They lost a hockey team.
In the state of hockey. They lost a hockey team to Texas.
Yes. That's pretty bad.
In the state of hockey. That's awful.
So yes, I feel bad for all Minnesota fans. It sucks.
If you can be underratedly shitty, they are... They're Minnesota cursed.
Oh, for... Is what they are.
They're passive-aggressively doomed as a state. Oh, don't forget the fact that, and this is really piling on, that the rival who beat them all the time in Brett Favre came to the Vikings, took them to the NFC Championship game, where he got the shit kicked out of them, and Adrian Peterson fumbled because he ate the French fries beforehand.
Also, Blair Walsh. Blair Walsh.
Let's stop doing this because it's making is it's making so 15 straight postseason games and 12 of them to the Yankees this is all I'm going to say for Minnesota and I hope this happens I hope that the sports gods in some you know act of kindness at some point in history lets this reverse and you win a world series by beating the Yankees in a thrilling ALCS, or you beat the Yankees like six years in a row. Because really, when you're that down, all you have to look forward to is some ridiculous reversal of fortune on everything.
Maybe it's got to be post-Kirk Cousins, but I would like to see the Vikings win a Super Bowl at some point. With Kirk Cousins.
With Kirk Cousins as, not as a quarterback, as a holder. As a coach.
As a holder that's making $90 million guaranteed. I have given, I'm making it my duty to give out pinstripes as the Yankees go along in these playoffs.
So just an update. I gave pinstripes to DJ LeMayhew on Friday night.
I didn't watch Saturday because there was football on. And then Monday I'm giving it to Glaber Torres.
Okay. So that's who's got their pinstripes so far.
Those are the only two to earn them this postseason? Yep. How can you give pinstripes to somebody in a postseason series against the Twins, though, as Yankees.
To quote Chris Rock. Listen, don't.

What you want?

What you want, a cookie?

Don't yell at my.

Isn't that what you're supposed to do?

Good job not going all the way there.

Yeah.

Don't.

Don't debate me on my pinstripes.

It's so great because actual Yankee fans are starting to debate me

on my pinstripes giving out.

They're like, dude, Glaber had his pinstripes like months ago.

I was like, listen, man, I don't give pinstripes for regular season wins.

That's pinstripes in your book.

Yeah.

Right.

Your personal pinchstripes. To go back to Queer Eye for the straight guy, you're the Queer Eye that's handing out pinstripes.
Right. You're like, hey, the horizontal stripes look very slim.
What about Rudy Giuliani? Does he have his pinstripes yet? No, they've been taken away. What about his horizontal ones? Ooh, Chris Christie's go chris christie yeah he's definitely yankees fan i was saying because i was thinking cowboys but of course yes because he's a cowboys fan um okay so and then uh let's see yadi is whatever yadi was throwing bats he was throwing bats he's doing throw that i will say for the-Braves series, I love when playoff series get contentious and guys truly hate each other.
I guess Acuna did the throat slash after game three. And then Yachty did it back to him, throwing bats.
I mean, Yachty is just everything about the Cardinals' dark magic that they have in the playoffs. There were some takes out there about Acuna saying that he's ruining baseball because well his own fucking teammates called him out because he he hot dogged it and it's hey if there's a time to hot dog it's not in the playoffs.
So that will be fun game five. That'll be really fun.
Yeah. How about the natat is back.
You want to talk about the natat real quick because we got Strasburg on the bump tonight. I'm very, very confident.
Strasburg, the Nationals probably would have won a World Series. I'm actually retroactively handing them the 2012 World Series where they shut Strasburg down in mid-September.
So they got one under their belt. But he's an awesome postseason pitcher.
Are you not worried about Walker Bueller being equally, if not more, awesome? Walker Bueller? No, not at all.

Okay.

Not at all. I think you're taking that a little lightly.

He's not Strasburg.

I think you're taking his skill a little bit lightly there, buddy.

Listen, the Nats are a better team without Bryce Harper.

Yes.

That's a fact.

It is a fact.

Well, no, it's not until they win a real series.

Well, they did.

No, a real series.

They won their first postseason series of all time.

If they win this series, I will 100% buy into that take. But they have to no a real series if they win this series i will 100 buy into that take but they have to win a real series i just want to say with soto i fucking love juan soto when he doesn't swing his bat when he takes a pitch and he does the shuffle stares at the pitcher and grabs his nuts yes it's the best got swag it's the best take in the business yes he's got swag so oh by the way did you see that Scherzer has four adopted dogs all with different color eyes? Yeah.
I love Max Scherzer. He's so awesome.
He's fucking insane. He's so good.
All right. Let me do this real quick.
Listen. We're going to get right back to the show.
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Restrictions apply. USA! All right, back to Pardon My Take.
Whoa. What's up, Coach? Hey, Hugh.
Hi, I'm Coach Hugh Jackson here on Pardon My Take. Let's do some hot seat, cool throne.
First up, Hank. Let's go.
Thanks, Hugh. Whoa, that was crazy.
Yeah. Hugh Jackson just walked in the studio.
Just walked right out. He just walked out.
Mike Silver's walking out behind him, holding his jockstrap. That wasn't a service that you can pay people to make messages on at all.
Anyway, my hot seat is WWE. Why? Okay.
On Sunday, they had- Be careful what you say next. They had a pay-per-view, and I guess they built up this guy, The Fiend.
They built it up. He was something new, something different.
The fans really liked him. They were getting behind him.
They were building him up to have this big match. And then in the pay-per-view on Sunday, they just had him lose very quickly.
Fans were very upset. They started booing.
When the thing ended, they were just going nuts, throwing shit, and people are very upset.

WWE fans are very upset.

Isn't that good, though?

Good for business to have the fans so engaged?

Yeah, but they want to build it up more.

You've got to really make us earn that nut.

Their fans are basically, we want something new,

we want something different,

and they basically just did.

It looked like they were doing something new,

something different, and they kind of just reverted to the same old ways.

It's like doing Sting's tantric sex, where you edge, but then four seconds and you're like oh whoops fiend lost okay uh and then my cool throne is one is ben simon's jumper because he can barely shoot now he can yeah no yeah against in a real chairs i've seen a few i mean there's been a few pre-offseason videos. Off-season videos.

I just saw one.

He has his first preseason game tonight, so we'll see if he hits one.

Do you guys think he'll hit one in his first game tonight?

A three-pointer?

Yeah.

I don't think so.

I think yes.

I think he will just because he'll probably try to attempt like seven.

Wait, is he in China?

No.

Okay.

We'll say C-word.

Okay.

He's on C-word?

No.

Okay.

Then no.

No three-pointers.

My other cool throne is the Knicks.

Wait, what would be if he wasn't China?

If he's in the-word? No. Okay, then no.
No three-pointers. My other cool throne is the Knicks.
Wait, what would be if he was in China? If he's in China, the NBA wants to really put on a show. Got it.
Give them their money's worth. I see your logic, yes.
The Knicks. Kevin Durant was on a, I don't even know where he was on.
He wasn't on this podcast. Yeah, come on the fucking podcast, Kevin.
But he was talking shit about the Knicks, saying that's not where anyone wants to be. Marcus Morris was on the team and he basically he's bringing the old Knicks back.
He was like swung a ball at a guy's head last night and he says we're going to bring the old Knicks back. And so I just feel like it's one of those things where so many people are shitting on the Knicks constantly that they're going to have to turn it around.
Unless they're like the Redskins where it's like they're never turning around ever. Well, guess what? There's a little bit of a common denominator denominator here.
I'm fucking shit. Shithead owner.
I'm sick of people hating on James Dolan. You can't be a James Dolan fan.
I think. And also a Dan Snyder anti-fan.
There needs to be. Those don't work.
Big Cat, there needs to be. There's a hole in the marketplace right now.
Nobody has branded themselves as a James Dolan defender. That's all I'm going to say.
James Dolan's son. Have you seen, wait, what do they call him? I think it's disgusting how they, everything's always James Dolan's fault.
I'm here to tell you, nobody wants to win more than James Dolan. What's James Dolan's son's name? Deuce.
No, but he's a bodybuilder. James L.
Dolan? Is it, oh, his son is James L. Dolan? He's a bodybuilder and he's like, everyone has been talking about

how he can lift

a million pounds over his head. I think

his band's not that bad.

Don't. James

Dolan's son. You know what? All I really want to do, I just

want to play guitar in the straight shot.

Yeah, I know. This is...

You can't be... You can't support

this guy. But I'm saying there's a big gap.

Nobody in the world is supporting James Dolan

right now. Like I said...
And so he would fall in love with anybody that did. There's got to be.
He's got to have some family member that still likes him. His dog.
The dog. The family dog still likes James Dolan.
That's for sure. I still like him.
Also, cool throwing is us. We had 100 NBA scouts at our practice the other day.
Oh, yes. That's true.
Not a big deal. That's true.
All right, PFC, what do you got? My hot seat is Zion. What? My hot seat is Zion.
Oh, what? I'll tell you why. Because they measured him, and he's actually only 6'6".
Oh, yeah. But did you see the highlights of his first game? I don't think that he's going to be able to dunk anymore.
Yeah. He lost all of explosiveness.
Yeah. It's sad, but I guess the shoes are juiced now in basketball.
Quinton Dolan. Q.
Q Dolan. Q Dolan.
Yeah, Quinton Dolan. He's a fucking big weightlifter.
All right, sorry. Go ahead.
Well, I was just saying Zion's on the hot seat because I don't think he's going to be able to be an explosive dunker anymore now that he measured in at 6'6". His NBA, his first preseason highlight show looked somehow like it was like, he's in high school, oh, he's not going to be able to do this against D1 competition, oh, he's going to the NBA, he's not going to be able to do this against NBA competition.
He was doing the same shit, just dunking all over the place. Yeah, it looks like he's going to do the same.
It looks, hey, I think, guys, I think he can dunk. Still? Even though he's only 6'6"? Yes.
I think what Hank just found out is, and I agree with you, Hank, I think Zion can dunk. But you would think with NBA players playing defense like that.
I know what you're saying, but I think we're going to get to that point where we're like, wait, I think Zion's just really good at dunking. My other hot seat is Oakland.
Okay. So the A's are saying that they are going to consider moving to Las Vegas as well.
Following the Raiders. Could you imagine how hot those games are going to be? Maybe we'll get the baseball field on the football field again.
Yes. Good.
God, that would be so great. The Raiders would be so mad.
Dirt follows the Raiders wherever they go. My cool throne.
Well, my cool throne was going to be not signing with the Knicks because Kevin Durant made that whole thing. Was that on a radio show? Yeah.
Who listens to the radio anymore? For all our younger listeners out there, that's a podcast that's broadcast live that your dad hears. Tune in Sirius 85, 11 to 1 to hear PFT show on my show.
Yeah. So that was my only cool throne.
That's satellite. That's different.
That's satellite. That's true.
Oh, good point. My other cool throne is Mike Tomlin quotes.
Yeah. So I've got, I'm going to do the thing again where I have two fake Mike Tomlin quotes and one real one.
You tell me which one's real. Okay.
Ready? We had red paint and so we painted our barn red. I've already done that one.
Now maybe yellow. Oh, he added a wrinkle? You want me to say it again? Yeah.
We had red paint, so we painted our barn red. Now, maybe yellow.
Okay. We're a one-in-four football team, but it doesn't have to stay that way.
Okay. I'm not here to respond to speculation about other football teams.
If you have a question about the Chargers, we'll embrace that together. First one.
Is the real one. Is the fake one.
First one's the real one. Oh, the real one.
That's the real one.

So he's done that one.

He added, he went back.

So now, so now that they don't have Ben Roethlisberger anymore, now that they don't have Mason Rudolph, the red barn reindeer.

Now duck is the yellow one.

I like that.

So he's a yellow duck.

I like that.

A little callback joke by Mike Tomlin.

Okay.

My hot seat is this league, this league people on Twitter because Instagram's updating so that you can't see the activity the same way is that right so what is what are all the NBA writers gonna do half of their content is someone follows someone or someone likes someone or someone responds to someone on Instagram that's a great point uh I mean what's what are they gonna to do? This is exactly like if you are someone who's sitting there and you work at. I don't want to say the name of the companies, but if you work at a certain company and you see this, you better start getting your resume ready because your content has been stolen by Instagram.
I think you have to just you have to do-fashioned way. Some shoe-leather journalism.
And just make a spreadsheet of who everybody follows at all times. And then cross-reference that like five times a day.
Got it. Okay.
Someone's going to do it. Someone absolutely will do it because there's a hole in the marketplace.
But that's a big hit on this league. And then my cool throne is Gronk because he's back.
And of a sudden gronk is a great speaker of english so he released a statement he said i'm extremely excited to be joining fox sports for the past 25 years they've offered viewers top-notch nfl programming from the field to the booth to the studio their deep talent roster is unmatched which was important for me as i embark on this new chapter in my life because I'll be able to learn from the best in the business.

That's Rob Gronkowski in his statement.

He wrote that.

He said it.

He said it.

He said it.

And then somebody else wrote it down.

And then he wrote it after.

He rewrote it.

I want to see Rob Gronkowski and Terry Bradshaw playing chess.

Who the hell thought that this would be a statement they could throw out there? How about them just wrestling? Just having them go at it. What do we think Bradshaw would just get broken in half Gronk week.
So I assume he's going to start this week because they wouldn't have made the announcement. So over under week nine.
He makes a 69 joke on set under under because right away's talked about it on this show that he knows it's like run its course, but the people at Fox News will be like, oh, we got Gronk. Let's throw some hilarious 69 jokes at him.
Oh, wait, he's going on Fox News? Or Fox News, whatever. Fox.
Yeah, Fox Sports. Gronkowski and Hannity.
Yeah, okay. That would be something.
That would move the needle. But yeah, you're right, Hank.
You're right. They're going to lay one up for him, and he's going to have no choice but to make it.
Right. He's going to be like Michael Scott with that's what she said.
He's just going to sit there, and his brain's going to freeze at like 69. He also has a whole new audience.
I'm assuming he hasn't spent a lot of time with the Fox crew, so now he gets around them, and it's just like, hey, guys, you heard this one about what's in between 68 and 70 that's gonna be his icebreaker for sure what is it what is the old thing he did roger roger goodell what do you guys think about roger goodell i fucking love drunk that's gonna be awesome i don't know how they're gonna use him i hope they use him in the right way i hope they don't put a suit on him and make him be like a stuffy you know analyst i hope they just let gronk be gronk do you think they're gonna use him as the rob riggle the the funny guy that would be great not the rob riggle the cooper manning yes cooper manning they should just have him just beating the shit out of cooper manning that would be that would be worth the money and then some uh okay let's get to our interview gary bucey it's an all-timer i'll throw it out there it's an all, interview. He's something else.
We actually, so the back story is, because I don't think we talked about it in the show, but his family didn't get their pictures at SeaWorld, and I help out with airlines, but I decided to help out with Gary Busey here, and I told him I'd face fuck SeaWorld if we didn't get the pictures, and then he followed me, and I DM'd him. And the rest is history.
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for details and get your queso and get your mac and cheese for sunday okay here he is gary bucey okay we now welcome on a very special guest it is gary bucey he is a hollywood star for decades upon decades he's in studio studio. He's written books.
He has his

Busey-isms. I'm very excited for this interview because you are, like I was saying beforehand, in two of my favorite movies, Point Break and Rookie of the Year.
And we will get into all of that. But it's just great to have you.
It's great. I mean, you are exactly as advertised even walking in here.
Well, i would like to thank you for giving me the honor and the privilege of coming on your show to speak about what we are going to speak about right so which is what what are which is what yeah what are we planning on speaking about you whatever did you just get here i did yeah just i just arrived this very second use your imagination but don't let it

get out of control i can't make any promises but i am also a very big fan of yours uh predator 2 was a great film the buddy holly story under siege under siege we could list them all this goes on black sheep what under siege yeah yeah yeah what was it like to work with steven seagal Well, it was different.

It was different.

Yeah.

Just different.

I've done, I'm not bragging, I've done over 165 projects in film, television, and miniseries. And each one is a different galaxy.
Each one is a different phenomenon. Each one is a different miracle and blessing.
So I take on the work I've been given to do with that kind of attitude and if you don't have anything nice to say about anybody don't say it because it hurts you more than it does the person you think you're hurting be kind be courageous be accepting with respect out of all these movies that we list and then there you know there so many others, which one is the one that you look back on and you take the most pride in? Wow. That would be the Buddy Holly story.
Because two months after I finished the movie, I saw it, and I realized, and I know in my faith and my belief, Buddy Holly's spirit was singing through me. I was the messenger in tribute and honor, Charles Harden Holly.
Lived in Lubbock, Texas, in the panhandle of Texas. And the ground is very flat in that part of Texas.
And you know what's good about living in a town where the ground is flat around you you can watch your dog run away for two weeks I never thought of it that way he just keeps running oh yeah he doesn't stop for two weeks straight so you were you were born in that area you were born in Texas and lived in Oklahoma I was born in Goose Creek Texas 11 50 a. a.m., June 29th, 1944, in the Lillie Duke Hospital delivered by the grandson of Pawnee Bill, who was an Indian scout.
My father was in the South Pacific fighting World War II as a seabee. Seabees can do.
So you were born in the middle of World War II. Out the middle.
Or towards the end. Yeah, towards the end.
Kind of in the middle, out the middle, between the middle and the end. Yeah, somewhere between the middle and the end.
Yeah, yeah. Maybe during the third quarter of World War II.
Third quarter? Like maybe two minutes left in the third quarter. Start of the fourth.
I think once we hit Normandy, we put our fours up. Yeah, okay.
Yeah, so yeah. Yeah, you could say, yeah, like 14 minutes left in the fourth quarter.
You know, I love you guys and your imagination, because even though your imagination is out of control, it's very good. It's incredible.
Thank you. So you started in music, not acting, right? You started as a drummer, and you had a band before you decided to become an actor.
Is that correct? Well, it's partially correct, because music and acting are the same thing yeah i used to get quaker oaks uh cylinders that were empty and folgers coffee cans and 10 cups and get pencils and play like i was playing drums in the living room in the first grade and my mother would get out of bed and say stop playing those drums and kick them all you You can swear on this. Fuck.
No, no. Motherfucker.
She said... Oh, that wasn't...
Your mom bleeped it.

Your mom would beep it. Okay.
Got it. Well, I'm not beeping her.
That's what she's saying. So you said that acting and music is the same thing.
What do you mean by that? Well, music is a beautiful thing everyone carries in their heart and their soul and their spirit. Music.
Acting is the absence of acting. It's believing in the truth of the moment you're creating at that time with your heart without thinking.
Absence is the absence of acting. It's believing in the truth of the moment you're creating at that instant without thinking.
So the best actors are really not acting at all. No.
God, how can't they? I flew back from Tahiti to LAX and my seat partner was Marlon Brando. He said, Gary, you have to remember that life is just a dress rehearsal.
Just make it up as you go without thinking and you'll be fine. I said, that's good advice oh boy yeah have you ever met anybody that doesn't like music though there are a few people that i've run into that just don't like music and i don't really trust them oh you don't trust people who don't like me if you say i don't like music as a blanket statement to me that's a red flag it's it's kind of a strange thing to say right you got to look at what they're not aware of and give them a prayer of understanding the beauty of the music they carry in their heart.
Because we all do carry music in our heart. We sing to ourselves.
We sing the songs we hear on the radio. And it makes you feel good.
Singing a song on the radio, you're in the car driving, you feel like a star. But let me tell you what the definition of a star is.
A star is nothing but a self-contained mass of gas way up in the sky. And they come in at night, and when they twinkle at you, they're saying, I love you.
Lovely. Neil deGrasse, you see you right there.
Yes. I like that.
Finally, you like something I said. Oh, i like everything you say yeah can we um can we

talk about your uh your motorcycle accident the fact that you died for two hours you were dead

for two hours correct did you go to heaven did you do you know what heaven looks like

i know what it feels like because i have been in the spiritual zone in the supernatural surrounded

by angels and my essence was about 12 inches long and about a quarter of an inch wide

I'm going to go ahead. spiritual zone and the supernatural surrounded by angels.
And my essence was about 12 inches long and about a quarter of an inch wide.

And that is your soul.

And your soul is housed in the column of your spine.

So I went off.

Hardy Davidson, going 40 miles an hour without a helmet,

hit my head first into a curb, then my pelvis hit.

Split my skull on the right side, knocked a hole in as big as a 50-cent piece. They took bones out of my pelvis to fill the hole.
I got a dent there. It was like playing golf on the wrong course.
You know, boom, golf ball hit me. Anyway, it was a beautiful experience of understanding something that I wouldn't have understood without having the accident.
So I thought, hey, I'm going to do something about this. So I went to Washington.
And my wife was John McCain. God bless you, John McCain, Bill Frist, Orrin Hatch, Ted Kennedy, and talked to them about what happened to my head.
And I said, we have to create something. And so I signed a piece of paper, and that was the applicant's statement that created the Dramatic Brain Injury Act that President Clinton signed in 1996.
So the motorcycle accident gave me a gift to help save others and wear your helmet. That's fantastic.
I've heard some people, they go through an experience like that. Obviously, every day is a gift after that, after you come back from an experience where you you come so close to death or in your case you you feel heaven uh was there anything that you when you when you came back to when you started going through your rehabilitation process was there any skill or anything that you were able to do after the accident that you weren't able to do before the accident everything was different in the way i saw life and the way I felt it.
And you know what a deja vu is? A deja vu is when your mind picks up something before your brain does. Then when your brain picks it up, it's like, I've been here before.
This has happened before. I had what's called, what I call vuja days.
And that's something I saw that I'd known, I'd seen before, but it was like the first time I was seeing it.

A brand new opening to a brand new way of life.

Thank God for the accident.

And I went and we did the traumatic brain injury act.

Now I'm working on making the helmet law mandatory in every state in the union.

Because that computer that sits on our neck controls our whole corporate body being emotionally, mentally, spiritually, and physically.

Without the computer, what are you going to do?

Yeah.

Yeah.

Nothing.

Absolutely.

In talking about all your roles in all the movies you've been in, what is the one or two that you always look back and you're like, man, that was the one that I really nailed or I had the most fun doing that one?

Well, the ones I've had the most fun with are all of them.

But the ones I didn't nail, I didn't nail them.

They nailed me.

That was Buddy Holly.

There's a movie that I did in England with Nick Rogue and that went to competition in the Cannes Film Festival in France.

Lethal Weapon, Star is Born, Under Siege, Point Break, 1991. Yeah, so when you did that movie, were you like, this is going to be awesome, this is going to be a cult classic? Because it is.
Point Break is a cult classic in my mind, where people, you know, you see it and you've even seen it go to, think people are doing it on stage now which is almost the true sign of a cult classic they bring it out on stage they have a point break too people talk about it it's one of those movies if you're watching on TV and you see it on I watch the whole thing no matter what don't get off my seat well it was a magical movie and uh at the end of the movie Patrick Swaywayze, God bless you, Patrick Swayze. Yes.
We're both from Harris County in Texas. He's Houston.
I'm Goose Creek. He wouldn't let me alone.
He said, you got to go skydiving with me. You'll be perfectly safe.
You jump out of a perfectly good airplane at 13,000 feet, and you'll face fear and apprehension like you haven't faced before. But you've got to shoot, and you open up the shoot, it opens up, and you guide yourself down.

Wouldn't let me go.

Every time I turn around, okay, we're going to go to skydiving.

I said, stop.

Finally, shut him up.

I said, give him a word of honor.

I'll go.

And when you're from Texas and do that, it means you're going.

I picked him up at 4 a.m., went to six hours of ground school, jumped out school jumped out of a perfectly good airplane 13 000 feet fell at 124 miles an hour i fell 9 000 feet in 55 seconds opened my chute and floated down championship with patrick swayze yeah that's pretty cool that's pretty damn cool yeah yeah he Yeah. He's a soulmate brother of mine.
Yeah. At the end of that movie.
Hear that? What? Hear that? That's the train. Yeah.
Is that an earthquake? That might be Patrick Swayze. There's a train that goes right underneath the studio.
We built our recording studio on top of a train station. Really stupid.
That's so you can jump out of the window and hit the train, right? Right. Yeah, really, really dumb.

I'll catch that train right now.

Yeah, right.

Exactly.

Exactly.

You guys are smarter than you look. No, we're not.
We're much dumber. I appreciate that.
I appreciate that. Yeah.
No, it's such an honor to be here with you. It's such an honor to be on your show with you.
You're both beautiful souls and wonderful people. You've got the greatness of love and consideration in your heart

to talk about what we're talking

about and why I'm here to talk

is about a play I'm doing called

Only Human. Yes.

St. Clements Theater.

Only Human has four characters.

The boss, which is

God, that's me.

Mary Magdalene,

Kim. Lucifer, Aquos Scalante.
And Jay. Okay.
Who? Evan Malpey. Is that Jesus, Jay? Yeah, that's Jay.
Jesus, Jay. Okay.
It is a funny musical, but it has the spirit that will come to you softly and funny-like.

And you will go in there.

I'm not acting.

I'm believing.

There's no acting required here.

Is there any difference between acting on stage and acting in front of a camera, whether it's TV or a movie?

How do you approach those two different styles in separate ways?

Well, I had a good miracle happen to me. I studied camera technique and foam awareness with James Best.
God bless James Best in the name of the Savior, Jesus Christ. He's gone, but not really for me.
And he taught us how to work on the set. And this, huh? You're talking like this to reach the back row so they can hear you.
Well, the movie's got a mic. You're going, hey, I want to talk to you about something that's important to you.
They hear you. And it's soft.
It's slow. It's moving.
When you're in a close-up on a screen, your face is 12 feet wide. So the thing you don't want to do is do this.
Rub your lips. Because your finger comes across.
your finger's eight feet long, and it goes across your mouth, and you're missing the point of the actor's dialogue. It's fun.
It's great. It's all the same, but yet it's not.
And that's the great thing about life. Life, L-I-F-E, stands for living in forever eternity.
It's not ever over. We've got to get to the Busey-isms in a minute.
You have the book here, too. But I wanted to ask you a question about James Best.
No. Okay.
I actually listened to some other interviews you did before this one. And you told a story about your first job and what James Best told you to make sure you do on your first job.
And I thought it was a really good life lesson for most people. Can you tell that story about how you basically walked around and said, Hey, okay.
Okay. Don't tell it.
I won't tell it. Shut up.
You go. Yeah.
He said the first day when you go on the set, walk around to the head of every department, camera, grips, props, electricity, sound, and tell them, I'm really excited to be here. It's my first day of working, and if there's anything I can do for you, let me know.
I had one day of work with no dialogue. I ended up with three days of work with seven lines just because I paid attention to the other person's feelings before thinking about me and my faults.
Don't think about your faults when you're doing art or the art won't come true in you art is only the search it's not the final form it is unlimited and it's beautiful and jimmy put me in a great place to step into the career climbing a ladder i already knew how to climb i i love that story just because it's a great lesson to everyone like hey when you, when you have your first break, when you get your first chance, don't just take the chance. Go beyond that.
You know what you do? You're not taking the chance. You're giving your chance to others to let them know you are so proud of them being with you.
Because without you, I wouldn't be able to do what I'm going to do. It's almost like a karma thing.
The more positive energy, the more... Karma the more the more you're willing to help somebody else karma the more they're gonna look for you to be the first person to give help to yeah that's right when you tell them I'll do anything to help you hey let's help this dude you know yeah they've never had that said to them mm-hmm that's what they told me nobody's ever up and told us, whatever I can do for you, let me know.
And that's giving love. Because they're behind-the-scenes people, and they don't usually get that from the actor.
Well, behind-the-scenes people doesn't mean they're behind the scenes. That means what they do behind the scenes is in the scene, on the scene, and you can see it, feel it, hear it, and love it.
That's like Hank. That's true.
That's our producers right there. Hank, we'll do whatever you need.
Hank is right there. Except for being on your fantasy football podcast because we didn't get first place.
We didn't get team of the week one week. What kind of hat is that? Friend bar.
It's a bar in Louisiana. Baton Rouge.
Hey, good luck. In Tiger Lake.
Yeah. It's one of the best bars of all time.
Do you know what bar stands for? B-A-R? No. Buy another round.
All right, let's talk about Buseyisms.

So your book, Praise for Buseyisms.

Yeah, okay.

I love Buseyisms.

Explain how Buseyisms started.

Well, I was writing a journal.

I've been betrayed to my heart.

And I was writing about what happened to me.

And I was...

I realized, hey, this is the past.

Where am I now?

Now, okay, now.

It's a great idea. what happened to me? And I was, I realized, hey, this is the past.
Where am I now? Now, okay, now, in O.W. That stands for no other way.
The first music I wrote, I was recovering from a traumatic brain injury, and the hospital, the doctors put me in a smock, gave me a clipboard, to take me on rounds, so I'd feel like, they told me I was going to be playing the doctor in the next movie. So I did okay.
And I would scribble things that you couldn't read. And I went to a drawer.
The patient opened it up, underwear and socks, all messed up. So I rearranged it.
And I said, that is neat. My first music is it was neat, nice, exciting, and tight.
And then came the others, and they kept coming, they kept coming. Faith, F-I-I-T-H.
Fantastic adventures in trusting him. Hope, H-O-P-E.
Heavenly offerings prevail eternally. Relationship, R-E-L-A-T-I-O-N-S-H-I-P.
Really exciting love affair turns into overwhelming nightmare. Sobriety hangs in peril.
Romance. R-O-M-A-N-C-E stands for relying on magnificent and necessary compatible energy.
That's a really good one. I really like that one.
Simple. Can we? Yeah, go ahead.
Simple. No, no, simple.
Go. S-I-M-P-L-E stands for See It Manifesting Precious Loving Energy.
So just be simple. You get sweet.
The eyes connect. There's a laser on the eyes.
The hands touch. The hands start sweating.
And the rest is up to you. Fun.
Fun. F-U-N.
Finally understanding nothing. That's great.
Yeah. Yeah.
It's really fun. That's why, because once you realize you don't understand anything, you're just having a great time.
You're just like, fuck it. There it is.
You laugh. This is great, yeah.
You laugh. What about, how about meat? What is one? Sober.
Sober. Sober.
Sober. S-O-B-E-R.
Son of a bitch. Everything's real.
That's perfect. Do you have one for Gary? Oh, gosh.
I don't do proper names. What about football? But I do B-U-S-E-Y.
B-U-S-E-Y. Being under spiritual energy yearly.
Can you do football? Football. I play football.
Football. If you were to make that a Buseyism.
Finding other offers. Trusting.
Believing. And living.
Ooh. You could just rattle them off.
It's like going to the jukebox and throwing in a dollar and just being like, let's get a piece of it. Don't forget to bring your jukebox money.
I did see that you played Bear Bryant back in the 70s. Yeah.
What was that like playing Bear? I like to welcome y'all to the Alabama football program. There's 120 of you here.
And down on the goal line, you'll see six footballs. Now when Biebs, Gene Starling here at the coach, blows a whistle, I want you to go down there and give me a football.
Bam! It looked like the Battle of Algiers for 15 minutes.

Leroy Jordan, freshman, he came back with four footballs.

And Bear looked at him and said,

I don't even think this boy has to practice.

Leroy Jordan and Billy Nabors, All-American guard,

were not allowed in contact drills because every time they hit somebody,

that person had to go to medical relief.

I love you. Leroy Jordan and Billy Neighbors, All-American guard, were not allowed in contact drills because every time they hit somebody, that person had to go to medical relief.

So they saved it for the game.

Bear is fishing with Duffy Doherty, coach at Michigan.

Duffy, you know people around here in Alabama think I can walk on water.

And Duffy said, well, here we are.

Try it.

Okay.

Stepped on the water, sunk, got up.

If you ever tell anybody you see this, I'll take away your whiskey.

And then Bear said, why don't we get this over with quick?

Here, I got some dynamite. Boom.
About 18 fish floated up. They took them in.
Don't tell anybody we use dynamite. Okay, let's go home and eat them.
So you played football. You played football in college, right? You had a scholarship? I played football in grade school, junior high, high school, junior college, college, scholarship shot.
Then I hurt my knee, lost my football scholarship and transferred to Oklahoma State University and majored in theatrical arts. Did you love football? Did you love playing football when you did play? Still do.
My dad was an All-American in high school. So, boy, I followed dad's shoes, you know.
I never made that, but doggone it, I was good. Yeah.
Because I believed in myself and doing it. And that's what you must do.
Whatever you're doing, however you feel about it, believe in yourself first. And your belief will come true in you to accomplish achievement you know you can do.
Have you ever run into a situation where you start that belief in yourself and uh and you have to find out a way how to get it back no i always have the way to get it back just believe in yourself and be truthful with your heart hang on a minute bless you i coughed it in sneeze oh i retract my bless you no don't do that i'll give you a you. Bless you.
Bless you. You corrected my bless you, though, so I felt like I needed to.
Yeah. It's confusing.
You're blessed. As a minister.
I'm a minister. Oh, you are.
You're blessed, sir. What is your ordinance? Universal Church of Life.
What is that? It's online. It's a registered ministry that I'm a minister of.
Is that as your house? It could be anywhere. It's everywhere.
The beautiful thing about it is it's universal, so it could be anywhere. How would you rate our spiritual energy as a duo and maybe just in the podcast room? I think it's great.
I think it's all great because you own it, you have it, and you don't have to stand on the box and pontificate. I see the light.
You don't have to do that because I feel your spirit. I feel it's rich.
I feel it's full. I feel it's loving.
And yeah, that's my truth. And my truth is the truth because I'm playing God in the play called Only Human.
Only Human. You got to come.
When does it start? We're going to come. When? October 8th.
October 8th. St.
Clement Theater. Clemens.
what? St. Clement's Theatre St.
Clement's Theatre October the 8th we're going to go to it no you have to go and bring your friends and put it if we come can we be considered one of your friends like when we show up we'd be like oh those are our guys let me tell. Let me tell you this, buddy.
You are forever my friend. Hell yes.
In the past 423 West 46th Street. That's where it is.
Yeah. Yeah.
Forever in the crew. We're going.
Now, what I'd like to ask you to do from my heart of truth, advertise the play. Yes.
For your show. Yes.
We're going to go and review it, and we're going to give you five stars. That's five.
What about six? It's actually balls system. Five balls.
Five balls. We rake everything on the ball system.
Balls? Yeah. What happened to you when you were young? A lot of stuff.
Balls, yeah. A lot of stuff.
Were you walking on a trailer to slip and fell and duck and boom? Something is wrong with all of our brains. I agree.
With your brain, something's wrong? Yeah. I think so.
I'd say to do what we do, there's something got to be a little off right no something's great about your brain something's full about your brain something's wonderfully loving about your brain i think the stuff that makes our brains different makes them good like i think we have very unusual brains but if you learn to love that your brain is unusual, it becomes an asset you know that's true because every one of us individually in our own personal being are different and that's what makes it interesting loving and happy because everybody's different from you that doesn't mean they're better that doesn't mean the worst that means there's something of their own galaxy that gives you love and gives you something to understand and see that you can't just understand and see by dealing with yours. Let everybody come into your heart.
Let all the galaxies come into your heart and give them love and understanding for who they are, what they are, how they are, and when they are. This might be a dumb question for somebody who's as an accomplished actor as yourself,

but I've always just wondered

how professional actors

memorize their lines.

Is it in front of a mirror?

Do you read them through?

Do you say them out loud?

Ha!

You just reminded me.

James Best told me

the power of cold reading

is you take this,

you know,

you're given,

okay,

go out and look at those three pages and come back in in six minutes. You'll leave the pages.
So I'd go out and take this six pages and read my lines to myself without emotions. Don't read the lines being said to you.
Just look at them. 25 times.
You go back in and put the script on the table and walk to the room and point something on the wall and say, this is beautiful.

The director says, my daughter made me that.

And the install master of the casting director said, Gary, you ready?

I circled behind the director, giving him the first line.

All the way through it.

Because I had it in my heart.

Doesn't mean I remembered it perfectly, but my feelings of the line I was saying were there forever.

Cold reading.

Acting. I told you what it is.
It's the absence of acting. It is.
But that's okay. It's okay.
I'm not judging anything. If you judge, you will be judged.
What was it like doing entourage? A TV show was wonderful. Larry Charles, who ran it, organized it, created it.
I went there and said, where's my script? He said, you're the script. What? Just make it up you go.
Hey, that's my forte. Yeah.
So I did the three shows we did, and it was wonderful. Then four years later, they made a movie.
And I did the movie. And that's what it was.
It was wonderful. And that's that with Entourage.
Yeah, you got to play yourself. Yeah, that's what I do all the time.
Even though I'm in the costume, makeup, and different hairdo or whatever, myself is beginning the artisticness of the character I am playing. Therefore, the character becomes me.
No acting required. That's like a beautiful life hack for acting.
A life hack? Yeah. What's a life hack? It's like what you're saying.
Instead of acting, you just be yourself. Yeah.
Yeah. Just what millennials call a trick.
Think of yourself with the innocence of yourself when you were nine years old. You're not acting.
You're just being you. And that's the grand slam home run and the target hitting and zen in the art of archery.
I like that. I think I actually peaked when I was nine years old.
You peaked? That was my, well, yeah, as an athlete especially because then everybody grew and I didn't grow. What were you peaking at? Basketball, baseball, football, soccer.
What was this you were playing football? Golf, fullback, wide receiver, kicker. Were you a good runner? No.
Did you snap anybody's sternum? Never. My own.
Did you snap anybody's sternum? Yeah. It's a hobby.
What position did you play? I played center, guard, and linebacker. Okay.
So, yeah, you definitely snapped some sternum. I could snap a football 30 yards into a bushel basket.
Damn. That's pretty good.
That's pretty good. That's really good.
What is your favorite thing you did in your life watching movies? What inspired you to do what you did after you saw a great movie? Which one was it? With the exception of mine. When I saw The Hangover, I decided to go out and get drunk.
I would say Best of the Best 2. I wanted to be like an underground martial artist.

And I saw that when I was like probably 26.

So it was probably a little late.

But yeah.

What was the name of the movie?

Best of the Best 2.

Oh, okay.

Wayne Newton was in it.

The Coliseum.

He has people come in there and they fight for rich people.

Wayne Newton?

Yeah.

Donkey Shane.

Yes, yes. Oh, Donkey Shane.
Yes, yes.

Oh, Donkey Shane. Point Break made me want to rob banks.

For sure did. Best way to rob

banks in the daylight

is wear a tie like Nicole

Miller would make. A tie that's so

garish. And they go to the teller

and say, what did he look like?

I don't remember that, but his tie

was such a fat.

This was told to me by a guy who really did that and he just got out of prison. He was on the set.
I was doing a movie with Dustin Hoffman and my son Jake when he was five. Straight time.
I feel like I'm talking too much about me. No, no, no.
I'm about a play called Only Human. We're all going to advertise that every day.
And we're all going to go see it. We're going to see.
You have to bring everybody you don't know, too. Okay.
But how would I bring somebody that I don't know? God, look at New York streets. Just walk around the streets and tell people.
But then I know them. We've got to give them cards.
Well, no, we're doing that right now. This podcast is telling all the people we don't know to come and see the play.
Don't tell them you don't know them. No, I love them.
No, we know them. They know us.
We don't know them maybe specifically. No, you know them.
You know their hearts. That's true.
So they're hearing you and they love it. Take the cards.
We'll give you some cards. You give them out to people.
It says, only human. It's where it's playing.
It's when it's playing. And it's lovely.
You'll come in there happy and you'll leave happier. I like that.
You'll come in there, I don't know what I'm going to see here, and you'll leave. God, that was great.
I want to tell everybody about this play, Only Human. You hear that out there, guys? Guys and girls? Only Human.
Okay, I have one last question about Only Human. So every single week, how long does a play run for? For three years.
Jesus Christ. So how many times a week do you do it? We do five performances a day.
No, I do it every night except Wednesday. Okay.
Saturday. Yeah.
So each night that you're doing it, right? So you're doing it five, six times a week, let's say. Do you try to do something a little bit different each performance oh no you stay with what that's written you stay with what the director desires you to do don't go against the grain of their soul or you're missing the point of the message of the play and i learned that when i did minsternary night's dream shakespearerhymed, I am a pentameter with no punctuation.
That guy is funny. Yeah, Billy.
He's funny. Billy Shakespeare.
Yeah. He knew how to write.
Well, he was born on April 23rd, and 53 years later, he died on April 23rd. So two and three is five, two and three is five, five and five is ten.
Ten is the number of accomplishment, achievement, and accomplishment achievement and a new challenge interesting it's so interesting you need to write it down put it on your refrigerator that's like the mind blow yeah we need to have that transcribed put on a quote card because i don't think i'm gonna be able to absorb it right now say that again five and two and three is five five and five is ten ten is the number of challenge, new changes, and accomplishments. That's Billy Shakespeare.
You know, when you accomplish an achievement, you get a new mark on your heavenly belt of goodness, grace, loving. That's what life's about.
With goodness, grace, loving, acceptance, and respect. All you guys out there listening to me, I'm glad you're listening to me.

And I'm going to meet you one day.

So every one of you are required to come to see the play.

Only human.

All right.

Go ahead.

Do you believe in hell?

Hell?

Yeah.

Hell?

Yeah.

Hell is what you make it within yourself. Okay.
So hell is a self-imposed condition. Well, it's something that's created by men who wrote the Bible.
It's created by... Hell is really something you create yourself.
I've been... The difference between organized religion and spirituality is organized religion is built for people to be afraid of hell.
Spirituality is for people who have been there. I'm in the second group.
I cause my own hell. Everyone can cause their own hell.
Just know how to get out of it, come to the light, and say, thank you, God. That's very insightful.
Thank you. All right.
Only human. Gary Busey, thank you for coming by.
We'd love to have you back on. Maybe we'll go see the play and then have you back on at the end of the run in three years.
Dismiss the word maybe. No, we are going to see it.
So you'll be back on. How long are you going to be in this play? Three years? Maybe four.
What is it? Through December 15th. Through December 15th so october 8th through december 15th we're going to see it during that time and then we're going to have you back on before you leave new york and we'll talk about the place some more and even more i mean people are going to love this interview you know this play is being worked on has been being worked on for eight and a half years geez and this is coming to a beautiful mountain of spiritual miracles and blessings i love it we're going to take a field trip the whole crew we seriously are it's been too long since the whole mountain of spiritual we're going to take a field trip you need to hold them up to this partner yep hank why don't you oh we're going for mountains of spiritual blessings and then we're going to have you back on and we're going to talk about how great you were.
No, don't talk about how great I am

because we already know that.

Let's talk about how great the play was.

That too.

That too.

All right.

Gary, do you see?

You guys are so funny.

Oh, wait, wait.

Yes.

Here.

And the book.

Yes.

This book is for you, Dan.

Thank you.

Read what I wrote.

Oh, wow.

Look at this. Thank you for your blessing in every way.
This book is for you, Dan. Thank you.
Read what I wrote. Oh, wow.
Look at this.

Thank you for your blessing in every way.

This book is for you, Eric.

Thank you.

There we go.

Thank you.

I'll give that to my brother.

You wrote the same thing.

Read what he wrote.

Yep.

Read yours.

Thank you for the blessing in every way.

God blessed you.

Oh, you got God blessed you?

God blessed you when you were born.

Hey.

Oh.

Damn.

I don't know who's got the better one.

That's very sweet.

I mean, I don't know how much more of a so we could put on this play other than, like,

go watch Gary Busey play.

No, I know.

I mean, this is incredible.

Yeah.

I know.

No, that's great.

No, we're going.

We're going.

We need to cancel the next guest.

I'm not leaving.

Okay.

Perfect.

You want to watch football all day?

We're going to watch football all day.

Football?

Yeah, we're going to watch it all day.

I don't blame you.

All right.

Gary Busey, thank you so much. Thank you.
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USA! All right, back to part of my take. Okay, let's wrap up with a couple segments.
We have Guys on Chicks with Uncle Chaps coming up. We'll start with some PR 101 for the NBA.
Boy, have they stepped in it. Yeah, they're in an interesting spot.
Steve Kerr came out. Yeah, unlike us, because we've already had our task force working on this for two days now.
Steve Kerr came out and had a statement and basically was like, I don't know enough about it. Which is cool if you're a podcaster, because we do that all the time.
It's honestly probably true. Yes.
Because it's complicated situation so much so i'm putting i'm putting this topic on our exempt list well commissioner's exempt list where we will get around to addressing it but we don't have to for the next six months and it's actually not complicated until i find out who won it's not complicated at all because steve kerr all he had to say is hey guys it's not complicated at all my boss told me that we make a shitload of money in China. So I will now say I don't understand it.
And please stop asking me. Right.
So there is one thing that I think people should understand about the NBA players and the coaches being over in China, as well as like I know ESPN is over there. Rachel Nichols is doing a whole thing over there.
The fact that they're not speaking out in favor of the Hong Kong protesters and against the NBA cracking down on Daryl Morey, I think they should get a little bit of a pass on it because they are in China right now. And would you want to be the person over there right now talking shit about the Chinese government when you're walking the streets of China and you have to be out in public.

Well, but they won't say anything when they come back. Well, if they do, that's one thing.
No, they're not going to say anything when they come back because they did the checks and that's what we talked about on Sunday. I'm saying I say anything when they come back.
I'm saying while you're over there, I understand not like wanting to speak out against the Chinese. They will not say anything when they come back.
Okay. They're going to do the same thing and that's fine fine i would prefer if they just said our money is paid in large part by china and all these people buying league pass and it's a big fucking country and we're trying to sell a shitload of kobe jerseys so therefore we are going to remove ourselves from this discussion and guess what at least i'll be honest you know i mean you could say it's hypocritical because the nba is pushing human rights everywhere except for when it hurts their bottom dollar and i wouldn't disagree with you at this point though if they just admitted hey we don't want to hurt our bottom dollar anymore but guess what that's how the world works we'll let the shanghai sharks weigh in on dc statehood that'll be our little tit for tat them.
Yes. There we go.
Perfect. You get to talk whatever shit you want about taxation without representation, and we get to mention Hong Kong once a year.
Right. Perfect.
Done. Done.
Done. Or they could just start playing games over in Saudi Arabia.
Yeah, we got this. WWE does.
We're good. All right.
So we have PMT Sports Biz Minute. Good morning.
This is Jake Marsh with the PMT Sports Biz Minute. Week 5 in the NFL included some all-time fantasy performances across the league.
In PPR formats, Will Fuller put up 54 points, Aaron Jones with 49, and Christian McCaffrey posted 48. The birth of fantasy football dates back to 1962.
A man by the name of Bill Wink Winkenbach invented and played fantasy golf and baseball in the 1950s, and the football version eventually followed. As for when people started to care for your fantasy team, well, the answer to that is, of course, never.
The MLB postseason is in full swing, and with each and every pitch having a great amount of importance, pace of play slows down heading into tuesday the total playoff game time has been 51 hours and 22 minutes or 184 860 seconds or an average of three hours 40 minutes per game that's your pmt sports biz minute mr cat and mr commenter back to you thanks jake very cool awesome very cool jake thank you very much um and then finally before we get to guys on chicks we got a take quake from a penn state alum who wrote a letter angry letter writers are back uh this is from david peter dave peterson he wrote to one of the players on penn state hey jonathan my wife and i are proud older graduates of penn state he lists all the things that he like you know like oh i love penn state blah first of all right off the bat i don't really trust anybody that gets married to somebody that they went to college with he's well they're penn state through and through yeah they're penn state through and through uh though the athletes of today are certainly superior to those in my days we miss the clean cut young men and women from those days watching the Idaho game on TV we couldn't help but notice your well awful hair surely there must be mirrors in the locker room don't you have parents or a girlfriend who who who've told you those shoulder length dreadlocks look disgusting and certainly not attractive we congratulate on your game against Pitt, but you need to remember you represent all Penn Staters, both current and those alumni from years past. We would welcome the reappearance of dress codes for athletes.
You will certainly be playing on Sunday in the future, but we have stopped watching the NFL due to the disgusting tattoos, awful hair, and immature antics in the end zone. Players should act as though they've been there before.
I don't like the antics. I've got to back them up on the antics.
Surprise, this guy quit the NFL. Big problem with the antics.
So they're saying they don't like excessive hair. This is actually perfect for Penn State football fans.
We don't want anybody representing our program that has tattoos, body hair anywhere. We want just smooth, pristine.
Stop. That's what Penn State football should be about.
So this guy is, I looked into it a little more because at first I was like, this guy's not real. He is.
And he is. Oh, he writes a is he writes a lot of habitual letter writer so he has written letters to local newspapers about his hatred of disgusting tattoos he's written about why babies should be banned from restaurants and airplanes and why a page about muslim holidays in a newspaper was offensive to 9-11 survivors so i don't respect anything this guy believes in.
I'm kind of with him on the babies and rest. You should not be allowed to feed your child.
Feed your child. So I'm with him.
I don't agree with anything he says, but I do kind of respect a guy who just sits at home and writes letters. This guy needs a hobby more than anything.
He has it. His wife says he's be like, don't you want to go play golf? No, he does.
I read more. He basically travels.
He has no kids. Surprise.
He and his wife travel and write letters. So he's the Marlins man of of the mail.
Yes. Of central Pennsylvania.
OK, got it. Yes.
Hell of a thing to live up. Listen, if you have if you if you are a letter writer, then write just write them, write them, write them, and just get your voice out there.
I did notice that this letter was not handwritten, though. He signed his name at the bottom, so he typed it.
This guy, I actually think it's a little bit of a cop-out on his part to not write them by hand. Maybe I'm just an old-school guy, but I liked it when our crackpots used to write letters to the editor in cursive.

Imagine if this guy figures out Twitter.

We need it.

We need Dave Peterson on Twitter.

Someone get Dave Peterson a Twitter account.

Get him on Twitter.

At least just have someone go sit and just take his thoughts and put them on Twitter.

Because he'd be electric.

Too spicy for the internet.

Once again, no long hair, tattoos. What else was there? And was and antics antics this guy doesn't even like football yeah no he's he likes football from like 1925 he likes staring at a picture of he a verbal meme what's his name dave peterson dave peterson is wolverine laying in bed and he's looking at a picture and the picture frame is just john unitus yes clean cut

yeah he's good man dave peterson what what are you gonna do man just write some more letters he's it's he's basically creed even for the internet it's shocking his thoughts okay let's wrap up the show with little guys on chicks and our uncle chaps who uncle chaps with the good eyes Uncle Chaps with a good eye.

He's got two good eyes.

I have chocolate.

Chocolate. Uncle Chaps.
Who? Uncle Chaps with the good eyes. Uncle Chaps with the good eyes.
There you go. He's got two good eyes.
I have chocolate voice right now. Okay, chocolate voice and banana eye.
What did it do to your eye because you tried to play me the video of it today? No, no, no. Don't do that.
But can you just explain what happened? Well, it's easier if I can just show you. I don't want to see your stupid gross eyes Just show you guys

So what happened

He was following me around

Holding it in front of my face earlier today

It's a medical procedure

It's like back when we first found two girls one cup

Now I wish I had fucked up eyes

I didn't have to watch that

Oh god

It's like a pimple popping video

No it's worse

They took a razor and they just scraped the shit out of his eyes

Stop

You look healthy is what I'm trying to say

Thank you. All right, let's do guys on chicks.
It's like a pimple popping video. No, it's worse.
They took a razor and they just scraped the shit out of his eyes.

Yeah.

Stop.

You look healthy is what I'm trying to say.

I look fucking good now.

Whenever I look in the mirror, I don't disgust myself.

Mostly.

Mostly.

Mostly.

You're thin.

Thinner, yeah.

Let's do guys on chicks.

Okay.

And now that you have two good eyes, you have no excuse for being a terrible reader. Your chocolate voice, though.
I do have a pretty bad chocolate voice. You want to get into it right now? Yeah, I can hear it.
It's like a frog. It's gross.
No, chaps, you want to drag the segment on even longer. Take a sip.
There you go. Sip it.
Okay. Way to come prepared.
Here we go. Sup, boys, especially handsome Hank.
I started talking to this guy, and we made it out at halftime at the Jets opener. Ever since then, the Jets have tanked.
Now that Sam Darnold is back, we are going to go to the game, and I need to know. Do we need to kiss again to break the curse, or do I have to ghost him to avoid further damage to the Jets? That's how you get mono.
So I would avoid kissing anybody at Jets games for the foreseeable future

unless it's Fireman Ed. This is also one of those

things where you could fuck

at the stadium and the Jets are going to suck.

So you might as well just live your best life.

I love public kissing though.

I know you do. I think that if you're

in that stage and you're in a wonderful

little fiery relationship

you just gotta do it.

You strike me as a guy that does the hand

in your partner's back pocket.

Oh, I was allowed. Absolutely.
I mean just the like you guys each are sharing a handful of ass. Well no you'd be wrong.
I've always been pretty self-conscious about my butt cheeks. I'll go for the ladies butt cheek but I don't really like my butt cheeks.
Because of the gas? Well, not because of the gas. No, Dan.
Because I have kind of chicken legs. And I've always been self-conscious about it.
And it squats over, bro. Even those don't work for me.
I did squat every day for a while. It didn't work.
Hank learned the word foreshadowing. That's ominous.
Oh! Keep going. Chaps doesn't even know.
I have no idea. The narrator, the omniscient narrator doesn't even know.
Okay. I'm not a chick, but what happened to the Jake Award? It was an award for the most interceptions week to week found on a mysterious card for the summer.
Yes. Good question.
Yes. We looked into it.
We looked into it, and I think that it was created on a Bill Simmons podcast, and we didn't want to take anything from their show, but we are going to guess the lines on Friday. To guess the lines.
Yeah. So we don't think that it came from a Bill Simmons show, but we think it was Simmons adjacent.
Column. It was a column, I think.

It wasn't ours.

It had some Simmons stink on it. I wish it was ours.

It wasn't ours,

and as big J's ourselves,

it's a genius thing,

so if Simmons came up with it,

all credit to him,

but we will not be taking anyone else's.

Correct.

I wish you guys would.

What would we do?

LeBron blames.

Just take it.

Yeah.

That's good.

Mm-hmm.

I don't know anything from your show. You could do like Medal of Honor.
Medal of Honor. Medal of Honor.
That's what I was going to say. Zero Block 30.
Everyone listen. It's the best show out there.
You could say that we're more of a pro-military podcast than he is. You guys have the Aguilar guy, don't you? I feel like you know that was a little over the top.
No, it wasn't. It's the best military podcast I've ever listened to.
Well, thank you. Except for the ones where we have Marlon's man on.
Yeah. Grunt of the week.
That's good. Do you do that? No.
Oh. Hey, PMT boys.
Earlier this year, my boyfriend suggested we be Dog and Beth chapman for halloween yes i reluctantly said sure literally five seconds later after he found out beth had passed he said oh man do you think it'll be frowned upon to still be them for no i told him yes but he insisted we wait and see till october here we are and he is insisting enough time has passed where we could now be quote beautiful tribute to a beautiful couple I say absolutely not who's right would we be cancelled if we were them if so any other costume ideas no just do it angel wings death is the perfect time to bring it right and also put put Beth Chapman with angel wings and maybe a little halo and then now it's not ooh we're making fun of a dead person it's this dead person in heaven. I can think of no better honor than to have somebody dress as me right after I died.
Yeah. Also, very touching.
As one of the biggest dog, the bounty hunter fans out there, I have officially, I'm done grieving. So you can do it.
Yeah. Which, so there are steps to grieving, right? It's denial.
Then it's bargaining. Then it's dressing up as that person for Halloween.
And letting Big Cat let you do it. If you don't do it this year, you can't ever do it.
Correct. This is the year.
Yeah, you have to do it because otherwise it just becomes, oh, that's lame. Like when Steve Irwin died.
Also, if you don't- It was in great taste to dress up as Steve Irwin in a khaki vest with a stingray hanging out of your chest. That was funny the first year.
Now it's just weird. Yeah, and if you don't find one of your single friends to be like a tweaker that you can chase around all Halloween, then you're not doing it correctly.
You need a Leland. Yeah.
You do need a Leland. Yeah, you need a Leland, and Leland's gained a lot of weight.
Uh-uh. We do not weight, Shane.
Well, it's just years. Now that you've lost weight, you've changed.
No, I'm just saying. I watched it.
I was like, that's Leland? Holy shit. So Leland is prominent is what we're saying.
He's a prominent boy. Sup, boys, especially Jawline Cat.
My boyfriend has a picture of Carson Wentz as his background since the start of the 2017-18 season. When I asked him if he would switch his background to a photo of us, he said, quote, I'll make you my background when you help the Eagles win a Super Bowl.
How should I address this? He didn't even win it. It was Nick Foles.
It was actually the Patriots. Speaking of which, trade Nick Foles? Absolutely.
You're all in on Gardner. I would trade him for a six-round conditional pick.
Now we might be able to make something happen here because, Big Cat, I think your team might be interested in Nick Foles. Nope.
We got Mitch. So I think we should trade Nick Foles to, like, the Steelers.
Ooh. They got Duck, though, who's an AWL.
Mm-hmm. Oh.
Yeah. Devlin Hodges.
To be Duck's backup. Devlin, yeah.
Devlin Hodges is a true alpha. They can't trade Carson Wentz because he listens to his podcast.
He just shoot Duck. Right.
And shingle him. That would be like the Wizards locker room all over again.
So you're all in on Gardner Minshew. Why would I not be? He's amazing.
Okay. I think Chaps is right because as a six-round pick, he's not getting paid.
Right. So, boom, just load up.
Yeah, because next year. That's the point I made on Monday.
You can hit free agency like a fucking ton of bricks. He's not allowed to get paid until at least three more seasons.
Yeah, I made this whole point. Go all in.
I agree with Chaps. Thank you, BFT.
I had a whole thing about this on Monday. BFT wasn't listening.
Good point, Chaps. I wasn't either.
Touche. What's up What's up drug guy Big Cat and Hank What gum flavor do you think Pete Carroll chews on game day That His Gum chewing has gotten Outrageous No I hate it Cannot be outrageous I like it How do you even I don't even know how you think When you chew gum that way Well it's tough for you That's kind of the point Is it So you're not overthinking things If you've got a jaw working.
Do you think he's just got one? Chad's like, let me spit out my gum real quick. I've got to tie my shoes.
I mean, that's true. If you're like that, no one even wants to have a conversation with you.
Why would the ref speak to you? I don't take you seriously. No one wants that.
That's a good point with the refs. No, I think the refs are okay with it because they get kind of a baseline of Pete Carroll.
I think his jaw moves at the same rate as his heart beats. So it's like, that's his constant EKG monitor.
He's like 110 a minute. He's real pissed.
Exactly, yeah. When he gets excited, he just To answer this person's question, it can't be one of the delicious gums that only has flavor for 15 seconds, like Juicy Fruit or Zebra there.
No, it's probably like your regular Trident or something that you can chew forever. He's got to be popping new gummies all the time.
Yeah. So it's probably like Fruit Stripes.
Yeah. Oh, no, but Fruit Stripes, literally, it's like 10 seconds and it's gone.
But that 10 seconds is the best 10 seconds. I think it's hard, though.
I think he's got bubble tape. So he's got like a shitload of it.
Either that or Big League Chew, maybe. Bubblicious wouldn't be a bad one.
That has some very good lasting thick gum. Great Big League Chew will get you going.
Now, Bazooka Joe, you can chip a tooth on that. Yes.
But you get the hilarious cartoon in there, which is great. Hello, gentlemen and itty-bitty PFT.
Love you guys. What's up? I've been texting and texting back and forth with this guy for a while, and he finally came over the other night, but that's all he did.

He just came over and wanted to sleep.

I kicked him out because why would I share my bed with someone for no reason?

I'm just curious if I should take this personally,

or do you think this guy's just choked?

Ooh, he choked.

Or you catfished him.

Yeah.

The C word's tough.

I don't know.

Maybe he just knew his limitations, and he was like,

you know what, I'm not up for a performance tonight. You ask me to come over and sleep with you, I'm going to go by the letter of the law.
Also, isn't that true love? Just sleeping together and never having sex? Kind of. Yeah.
You're just fast-forwarding to the true love part of your relationship. It's not physical.
You might be a sapiosexual. Have you guys heard about sapiosexuals? Nope.
you are attracted to somebody's brain You just love their brain You love to watch them think That's how I am You like getting brain? Fuck yeah What's up boys? I'm a single mom You might just be homeless too That would be a great grift To be just a devastatingly attractive homeless guy I feel feel like he would have gone viral by now if there was a very hot. Yeah.
Well, he doesn't tell them that he's homeless. No, but I'm saying if there was a devastatingly attractive homeless person, there already would have been a picture being like, check out this homeless guy.
He's so hot. And Buzz, he'd be like 17 times.
You thirst trapped at a homeless person. And then that homeless person gets like a shitload of money donated to him.
And then it turns out that they're racist. Yeah, they were a Nazi.
That's why they're homeless. They got fired because they were like wildly racist at their old job.
I saw my first train shitter today. Oh, yeah.
When I was on my way from Newark here to the office. Was he wearing a pink shirt and white hat? She.
Wow. That's hot.
Sweatpants. uh who's the character that kind of has some mental issues on or is the new black i don't know i don't watch you know jason biggs yeah jason biggs she looked like jason biggs she sat there and there was like four other people around like watching her eye contact because she like when you watch your dog yeah she shut her eyes and like put her butt cheeks up against one of the chairs and was like okay all right next next one i know what shitting looks like next one you ever seen a trained masturbator you're not a real new yorker sup boys i'm a single mom i own my own house have a great job and a good relationship with my son's father i recently been on hinge and bubble and i'm always up front about the fact that I'm single mom because to them, that means that they've reached maturity.
Right? If you're just... It doesn't matter if the girl is younger than you.
It tells a guy you're a grown-up once you start sleeping with somebody that's already had a kid. Also, maybe make a highlight reel of your kid being cool and then put that in your hinge.
No, that would be even more intimidating. No, but it's like, hey, he's not one of those kids that's going to ask for you to be a dad.
He's just going to grab you a beer and maybe have a catch every now and then. Yeah.
He's not going to interrupt us when we're making love. Right.
Here's his cage. Right.
A picture of your kid in a cage. It's a mixtape.
You need a video of how the kid goes to sleep at night. If the kid's like three years old, like if you tell him, all right, it's time to go to bed.
And it's like 6 p.m. And it's like 45 seconds long.
Because I think then you'll get in a relationship. You'll be comfortable.
But if it's like a two-hour process, nobody wants that. Right.
Also, I mean, if you're a mom, then you fuck. So that actually should be a big green light for the guy.
Oh, no. This next one is heavy.
Hey, guys, my boyfriend has AIDS, but he hasn't told me. But he hasn't told me yet? Yeah.

The only reason I know

is because he told me when he was drunk

but doesn't remember that he told me. Do I

bring it up or wait for him to tell me? It's

fucking AIDS. Yeah.

Is that like a crime?

That is a crime. To have sex with somebody if you know

that you have AIDS? I also feel like maybe he

was joking? Is that a

joke though? Just goofing?

Depending on your level of dark

humor. It's a joke, though?

Just goofing?

Depending on your level of dark humor.

It's a little casual.

I didn't tell you I have AIDS. Did you hear about the guy?

He went to his doctor, and the doctor was like,

I got bad news and worse news.

Which one do you want first?

He goes, give me the worse news.

And the doctor goes, you have AIDS.

He's like, well, shit, that sucks.

What's the bad news?

The doctor says, you have Alzheimer's. And the guy goes, well, at least I don't have AIDS.
He's like well shit that sucks. What's the bad news? Doctor says you have Alzheimer's and the guy goes well at least they don't have AIDS.
Nice. Nice.
Nice. That's a little like gallows humor.
That was like the fifth hole of a golf outing. Once you had a couple beers the first guy in the group is pissed out.
Bob from accounting loves that joke. Sup, boys? My boyfriend made me three...
Oh, no. Sup, boys? My boyfriend made three separate comments to me about how my ass has gotten smaller this weekend.
So I'm back hitting the weights for Squat-tober. There we go.
But my boyfriend never compliments me anyway. So it's even worse getting my ass back.
No, I think squats over, it's a personal challenge. Yeah, what you got to do is get your ass back and then dump them and then get a hotter boyfriend.
Who doesn't compliment a nice ass, though? Well, she's... Well, she lost it.
Yeah. But still, you still, even if you don't mean it, you still throw, like, you see a naked butt cheek out there.
You're like, I listen to your podcast. Yeah.
Well, the nice thing, here's what you need to do. So it's like when you lose weight, you have to get a new ensemble.
You got to get a new wardrobe to match your body. Just get new jeans.
They make jeans that will highlight your new ass jeans. Yeah.
Also, it's been a week since Squattober started. So maybe the gains aren't as noticeable as you might think they are.
Squat in his face. On his face.
Sit on his face. Yeah, there we go.
No choice, baby. Fuck, yeah.
I recently found out I might have chlamydia from a guy I hooked up with a while back. I'm currently in a relationship with my boyfriend.
Do I tell him and risk losing him or just keep it to myself? I don't think chlamydia is something that you keep for yourself yeah this is a similar to the aids conversation the whole thing you gotta say it keeps on giving i think that chlamydia is really easy to treat too isn't that one that's curable right yeah that's something you'll have a laugh about well they're all curable at this point yeah i don't think you have to i think if you have chlamydia and you go get treated for it and it's cured you could deny it deny yeah yeah yeah if it's in because it's a hipaa violation if somebody says that's not true true good point adam schefter yeah also is he gonna be pissed off that you had sex with somebody before you were dating i don't think so i don't think so so you could just be like hey i got it from somebody else yeah unless you're like who and he's like well it could be any one of these 78 guys. Yeah, or like it's his main rival.

Yeah.

Then he has to kill him.

Mm-hmm.

Yeah.

Why does my boyfriend always spit in the toilet before he pees?

He says every guy does it, but he can't possibly be true, right?

It's testing the water.

I don't piss before, or spit before I piss.

You spit on your piss?

No, I don't do that.

Spit on your dick.

I don't like to spit.

I probably haven't legitimately spit.

God. Since I stopped smoking, so like nine like to spit.
I probably haven't legitimately spit since I stopped smoking,

so like nine years.

Whoa.

Not even a little spit?

Unless I got like an allergy infection,

like if I got just a little touch of bronchitis.

Give me a little spit.

Let's pop that cherry.

I don't spit.

Come on.

Spit, dude.

I don't want to spit.

What's wrong with you?

You guys are going to...

I'll do it first. Okay.
Spit. I don't have enough spit.
Do it. Spit.
Spit on my spit. Give that chocolate.
Oh. That sounds disgusting.
You almost got it on your cell. What's wrong with you? You don't know how to spit.
I don't. No.
I told you. It's been a long time.
Spit is not a good look on your chest. Spit is not like riding a bike.
Yeah, you got to be in spitting shape. I love watching baseball when it's late at night in the late innings of a game when they just cut from shot to a player until he spits to a shot of another player until that guy spits.
At some point, baseball just becomes guys spitting on a field. Right, and there's good spitters that you just know.
He's going to have a bunch of sunflowers. Who's the best spitter you've ever seen? Terry Francona.
Bodie from The Wire. Yeah.
John Smoltz was really good. Lou Piniello was a pretty good spitter.
Sean Taylor. He spat with purpose.
Chipper Jones was a really good spitter. Yeah, Chipper Jones was a good spitter.
Diego Maradona spat on the camera one time, then they tested it, and it came back positive for cocaine. That's how they caught him.
Really? Chief Hernandez. Who told us that story? I forget.
I'm just to the

point where it's all my life is a blur.

Was that a fake story? Someone told

us what Frank French

on the podcast.

I got second hand

shot in the head.

I was like,

wait, I've heard that story. Wait, we heard that together.

Is that it?

That's it. All right.
It's been wonderful. Don't rub any more bananas on your eyes, okay? Bad spit.
Look great. Eyes look great.
Podcast is doing great. ZeroBlog30, download it.
Where are you going to be this weekend? I'm going to be in Dallas for the Natty Tour. We're going to go to the Texas State Fair, hanging out with Big Tex.
Who are you going with? Kate and Pat. Fuck yeah.
Eat the deep-fried butter while you're there. Don't eat the Kool-Aid pickle.
One thing that I'm looking forward to is the deep-fried peanut butter and jelly. Yeah.
Okay. Do it.
It's cheat day. Saturday.
Yeah. So you got it.
I got it. Eat whatever you want.
All right. Okay.
Thanks, chaps. Dude, you should do the hands-free banana cream pie eating contest.

In.

Okay.

But make sure you don't get it on your head.

Wear goggles.

Face.

Yeah.

The bananas.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Okay.

Got it.

Love you guys.

Bye.

Bye.

Bye.

Bye.

Bye.

Bye.

Bye.

Bye.

Bye.

Bye.

Bye.

Bye.

Bye.

Bye.

Bye.

Bye.

Bye.

Bye.

Bye.

Bye.

Bye.

Bye.

Bye.

Bye.

Bye.

Bye.

Bye.

Bye.

Bye.

Bye.

Bye.

Bye.

Bye.

Bye.

Bye.

Bye.

Bye.

Bye.

Bye.

Bye.

Bye.

Bye.

Bye.

Bye.

Bye.

Bye.

Bye.

Bye.

Bye.

Bye.

Bye.

Bye.

Bye. Thank you.
I'll be coming for your lover. Shying away.
I'll be coming for it's okay. Stay young to me Life's no better to be safe than sorry Thank you.
Take me young

I'll be gone

You're empty

You're empty