Actor Gary Busey, Baker Party Line + Guys on Chicks With Uncle Chaps

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Speaker 1 On today's part of my take, we have the legend Gary Busey. We go to an alternate reality.

Speaker 1 He is something else. One of my favorite interviews we've done.
Think Bill Walton, actor Bill Walton, but maybe even crazier and saner in the same way. I'm already just doing Busey things.

Speaker 1 He has me so twisted that I don't really know how to describe the interview. You're going to feel like you did a drug after listening to the interview.

Speaker 1 And not a bad one either. A really good one.
Yes, it's an awesome interview.

Speaker 1 We have some Monday night football cleanup, some baseball talk, hot seat, cool throne, and we have our Uncle Chaps here for guys on chicks.

Speaker 3 Before we get to all that, part when cool, creamy ranch meets tangy, bold buffalo, the whole is greater than the sum of its sauce.

Speaker 3 Say howdy, partner, to new Buffalo Ranch sauce only at McDonald's for a limited time.

Speaker 1 They're participating in McDonald's. Okay, let's go.

Speaker 1 No papers, hang on, low washing.

Speaker 1 And then I can't name all of the songs. Oh no, we're gonna rock it down to Elite Strait Avenue.

Speaker 1 And then we take it higher.

Speaker 1 Oh, we gotta ride down to Elaine. Trey Kyrb and my take.
Presented by Barr.

Speaker 1 Welcome to part of my take presented by the Cash App.

Speaker 1 Go download it right now. Use code Barstool.
You get $5 for free. $5 to ASPCA.
Today is Wednesday, October 9th.

Speaker 1 Do we have a Baker Mayfield problem? Question mark. Yes, the fact that he has not addressed the handshake controversy brought to light by Richard Sherman, I would say his silence speaks volumes.

Speaker 1 Ooh, boy, was that a bad game for the Browns on Monday nights. They look like they are not ready for primetime, as they say.
Just

Speaker 1 unfortunately, there are a ton of them. They're on prime time a lot.
I hope they get ready.

Speaker 1 I am going to... I know Baker is probably taking a lot of heat today, and we are the preeminent Baker Mayfield podcast, the support group, the fan group.
I'll just say this.

Speaker 1 I think Baker himself would tell you he needs to play better. There you go.
That's the best way to do it. Okay, so you're criticizing someone you're playing with.
You're saying he would

Speaker 1 play. He would be the first to say he played poorly on Monday night.
Baker is his own worst critic. So it doesn't matter how bad we trash him because he's going to say something wrong about himself.

Speaker 1 And we welcome that. And you know what?

Speaker 1 Even more than that, PFT, we wouldn't.

Speaker 1 As a Baker Mayfield podcast, we wouldn't point the finger at the atrocious offensive line or the fact that Freddie Kitchens looks like he's never seen a playbook in his life. We wouldn't do that.
No.

Speaker 1 We say it starts and ends at the quarterback position, and we're going to get better. Their offensive line did look awful, and Freddie Kitchens looked worse, if we're being honest.

Speaker 1 Yeah, no, the whole thing was a disaster. Freddie Kitchens, he looks out-coached.
He looks like he's underwater. He looks confused.
He looks like he has never seen a blitz in his life. Rosillo's.

Speaker 1 Very not creative. Rosillo has a phrase that he uses, and I think it applies to Freddie Kitchens.
He's got coordinator face. He's got coordinator bod.
He's got coordinator face.

Speaker 1 He does not look like, I don't know what, maybe he needs to go. Maybe we need to bring back, remember, queer eye for the straight guy.

Speaker 1 We need to bring that back, but it's just us making over football coaches that have coordinator face into head football coaches.

Speaker 1 Yeah, so with Freddy, how would you start that out to get him to have a head coach face? The mustache might not be a bad idea. Maybe shave his head.
Put on a suit. Visor.
Go visor. Go visor.
Visor.

Speaker 1 Shaved head. Fedora.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 Maybe just put his face in a big bucket of ice for a while, get that thing a little thinner.

Speaker 1 Is that how it works? You know, the Instagram models are pushing the face roller thing now, whatever it is. It's like, I don't even know what it is.

Speaker 1 They just roll their faces. They're like, look, I'm skinny now.
You know what? Anytime a coach has a sunburn, they look like a head coach to me. Maybe you could just go hang out in the sun.

Speaker 1 Like Mike Shanahan, he always at least appeared to be a head coach. Just get that sucker a little bit more tanned up.

Speaker 1 It was not a good showing for the Browns' offense. The defense still looked pretty good at times.
And

Speaker 1 you want to say that? They got ran. I think they had like 185 yards rushing.
You know what I did there? Yeah. I said at times.

Speaker 1 Also, that 83-yard run running play took up most of that.

Speaker 1 And if the Browns had scored when they were going in, it was about to be a 14-10 game. I was going to say the game's different if they don't drop that catch in the end zone.

Speaker 1 Baker put it where it needed to be, but you're right. It doesn't, it's not a great look.
Here's, yeah. And the

Speaker 1 problem for the Browns,

Speaker 1 I wanted to believe in the Browns, and I still think that they've got enough talent to be good. But this was always a question, was Freddie Kitchens.
All right.

Speaker 1 So it's, well it's a question of everything because I think the whole team hasn't really proved anything and Baker you know is we love the outspoken guy we love the guy who talks a lot of shit and uh you know is himself but when things go poorly you have to expect the backlash you have to expect the nick bosa doing the flag dance and you have to expect you know cow turd getting on his show and saying this all comes with the territory i don't think it's i don't think it's unfair for people to pile on baker right now he he doesn't.

Speaker 1 Yeah, no, you know what? He deserves it. He deserves it right now.
That doesn't mean he won't get back to what he was at the end of last year.

Speaker 1 But at this very moment, he deserves to be piled on because the Browns talked a lot of shit and they were picked to win a lot of games. And right now, it's hard to see it.

Speaker 1 Now, spin zone for Cleveland. The AFC North stinks.

Speaker 1 I'm not a believer in the Baltimore Ravens. I think this, you know,

Speaker 1 we are believers in the Pittsburgh Steelers now because we found out that Duck is an AWL. So that's bigger than that.
Listen, guys, just so everyone knows out there,

Speaker 1 any athletes who are listening, all you got to do is publicly say you're a fan of ours, and we will never say a bad thing about you.

Speaker 1 Until you play poorly on Monday Night Football, and you would say poor things about yourself. Right.
And then we'll just echo the things you would have said. You know what?

Speaker 1 We fucking have Baker's back on this because we're backing up his own statements that he's probably thinking about himself at this point. Right.

Speaker 1 So

Speaker 1 the Steelers, obviously one and four, don't look great. The Bengals are a dumpster fire.
That's going to be a division that you can win what it feels like in week 16 or 17.

Speaker 1 I love that anything that happens in southern Ohio, nobody really knows what the fuck's going on because right now all the talk about the shitty teams in the league, it's the Dolphins and it's the R Words and the Bengals are just coasting by.

Speaker 1 Oh, I got it.

Speaker 1 No one's really. I said before the show, I know so little about the team.
I don't know who the fuck is on the staff besides Zach Taylor.

Speaker 1 Even Jeffrey Dahmer could be one of their assistants, and I wouldn't know. Exactly, which would make it even strange.
Crazier that you wouldn't have found out.

Speaker 1 That I wouldn't have found out about that. Like, I don't know anything about what's going on with the Bengals.
The Browns, you're right. They still could turn it around.
It's not over.

Speaker 1 Listen, we overreact so much, and I'm not here to overreact. It's just what the Browns season feels like it's going to be, it's going to just be this.
It's going to be the up and down.

Speaker 1 When they win, they win, and it looks good. When they beat the Ravens, they beat the Ravens.
When they lose, it's ugly. When they lost to the Titans, that was ugly.

Speaker 1 When they lost to the Niners, that was ugly.

Speaker 1 So I think that is just, if you're a Browns fan, and I don't have to tell you what it's going to be like because you know what it's going to be like, but it's up and down.

Speaker 1 At least there's hope. There's hope.
And here's the thing. There's also an element that a lot of the bad always feels worse when your team has that much hype.

Speaker 1 Also, the bad feels worse if you lay an egg in prime time. Correct.

Speaker 1 If this was hidden in the mess of 10 games that we had on Sunday in the early slot, people would be like, yeah, they'd be questioning the Browns, but it wouldn't be this much of a focus on it.

Speaker 1 And let me do an old broadcasting trick here. I think we need to actually give more credit to the 49ers.
Yes, because those 49ers are a good, good football team.

Speaker 1 The difference between Kyle Shanahan's offense and Freddie Kitchens was like they were playing two

Speaker 1 chess and checkers. Totally different games.
No, it was like chess and then playing a game when you're like in elementary school. Eat the play together.

Speaker 1 Yeah, where you dare your friend to eat something nasty and then make fun of a bonus freddie kitchens was finger painting and and kyle shanahan was doing the sistine chapel right yes he was or he was composing music like mozart right but what i'm getting at is the 49ers offense is a lot of fun to watch our guy george kittle hit the ground

Speaker 1 one cut and go it's

Speaker 1 baby it's bad i think the shanahan offense whether you're talking about mike or kyle is just comforting it's like a warm blanket i got something for kyle though put a little bend in your hat man Well, also, maybe we don't have a hat with the smallest logo ever.

Speaker 1 It looked like it was printed, like a JPEG was printed out right before the game started.

Speaker 4 I feel like they had a pregame, preseason meeting with like the merch designers where they presented like these, like, oh, Kyle, we know you're like a cool guy.

Speaker 4 And they presented all these like cool different alterations to the 49ers logo. Yeah, uh-huh.
This is the 49ers logo, but it's like a surfer style.

Speaker 1 This is the 49ers logo, but it's super tiny and no one knows. It's like Dereleked.
Oh, and this is. It was minimalist.
Yes. Yeah, that's what it was.

Speaker 1 It was like you have to really search for the logo, and the giant flat brim looked like he was an a posse of a BMX bicyclist. Ooh, they should do a minimalist hat with TJ Laven.

Speaker 1 Yeah, where it's like a Mario coin. It's just a gold coin for the gold rush.
I like that. That's good.
We should do deconstructed logos. We should also talk about the handshake gate.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 What happened after the fact this morning, Richard Sherman publicly accused Baker of not shaking his hand at the pregame coin toss.

Speaker 1 Which is important, we should add, because Baker famously, Kansas didn't shake his hand, and then he had to both fuck them on the field and off the field by grabbing his penis. Yes.
Yes.

Speaker 1 So he allegedly did not shake hands with Richard Sherman. Then we retreated to like nine different camera angles of the handshake actually happening.
Way too much.

Speaker 1 And then Richard Sherman was like, no, I was talking about after the coin toss because he didn't shake my hand a second time afterwards.

Speaker 1 No, the first time, there were two handshakes. There was one that happened before the coin toss.

Speaker 1 And then afterwards, one of the Browns captains shook hands with somebody else on the 49ers, but Baker left before that second. It's Schrödinger's dap.

Speaker 1 It was like, I'm going to, I did, I both dapped you and didn't dap you at the same time. This is so stupid.
This is the Baker Mayfield.

Speaker 1 Look, like I said, when it's bad, it's going to look worse because of all the shit that was talked. Yes.
And I'm not giving up on Baker.

Speaker 1 I don't want you to give up on Baker if you're listening to this and you're a Browns fan. People will give up on Baker, and that's fine because this is the fun narrative to have right now.

Speaker 1 I totally understand it. Listen, if Baker Mayfield didn't come on our podcast, we admit our bias.
We'd probably be clowning him. Actually, I would, because I always liked Baker.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 I always think I'd be clowning him, but I would be saying all the same stuff about him, not thinking I was just having his back by saying it. Right, right.

Speaker 1 And he probably doesn't even listen and he doesn't really care. But more than anything, I'm saying this because I do think the overreaction to Baker sucking is a little severe.

Speaker 1 If he had an offensive line and a competent head coach, I think it would look a little different, but he does have to play better. We'll put it this way.

Speaker 1 He stinks, but he doesn't suck. Yet.

Speaker 1 But he could still get back. There are people who are saying he sucks.
He doesn't suck. He stinks right now.
Yeah, he stinks right now. Oh, he stinks.
Suck right now. Yes.

Speaker 1 If he puts together like four more games of this, then we start to use the S-word. But until then, we'll say that he stinks.
Yeah. Okay, fair.

Speaker 4 I feel like negative two fantasy points is.

Speaker 1 You know what?

Speaker 1 No one gives a shit about fantasy football. No one cares.
Hank, name one person here that gives a shit about scoring in fantasy football. Not me.
Not me.

Speaker 1 I care about one score only, and that's what happens on the game. I settled my business on Sunday on the field.
Yeah.

Speaker 4 I'm just saying, you got to score. I mean, you got to be a zero to be like bad.
Once you get in the negatives, that's sucky territory.

Speaker 1 We don't say the S was, Mitch.

Speaker 1 No.

Speaker 1 That's what I'm saying. Mitch is really good.
Yeah, Mitch is awesome. Yeah, has not taken away from your team yet.

Speaker 1 That was a loaded question I just asked you. That could have gone very badly for me.
I know that every single week. Our friend Booger has been getting a lot of crap for his performance in the booth.

Speaker 1 I like Booger. Who? McFarland.
Who is giving him a charge? You know, more than one Booger? No, who's giving him a internet in general. I didn't see that.
Oh, yeah. Yeah.
The internet is not happy with

Speaker 1 Booger. No, if you just name search Booger McFarland, he's getting a lot of shit right now.
But

Speaker 1 I like the way that he reminds me that different lines on the field are analogous to having a 12th player. So he was saying, like, the sideline is your 12th player.

Speaker 1 The back of the end zone, that's your 12th defender right there.

Speaker 1 Freddie Kitchens not being able able to run an offense. That's your 12th tackler right there.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 People are giving Booger shit. Yeah.
I mean, I don't think Booger's like reinventing the wheel. Booger is comforting.
He's like a bowl of chicken soup.

Speaker 1 He's not going to enlighten you with anything, but he just sounds like football. He's no Tony Romo.

Speaker 1 I haven't heard Tony Romo this year. Is he playing too much golf? No, he's just, I feel like he's not been on

Speaker 1 a late

Speaker 1 Sunday afternoon game yet. Right? The prime time.

Speaker 4 No, he was on the the Chargers Broncos last week.

Speaker 1 He was, but that wasn't Packers Cowboys. So I'm actually good with Tony Roma right now.
Like, I'm at the right level of Tony Romo. I actually want to hear him this year because it has been so long.

Speaker 1 It feels like they've stepped back.

Speaker 1 Because remember when he first came and it was just

Speaker 1 Thursday and Sunday. Yeah, oh, that's the okay.
Thank you, Hank. I knew my brain had it somewhere.
All right.

Speaker 1 If you want to watch Barcelona or Barcelona, or sorry, pardon my take, go to barstowgold.com slash PMT. We're doing it right now live.
Hi, what's up? What's up? What's up?

Speaker 1 Before

Speaker 1 baseball, we've got to talk about Jay Gruden. Yeah.
Fired at 5:30 a.m. Fired.
Yeah, what an insane move, first of all, for Dan Snyder to call a meeting at 5 o'clock on a Monday morning.

Speaker 1 Is that insane? Because he's insane, so then everything he does is sane. He was definitely still up.
Yeah. He did not go to sleep, if you know what I'm talking about.

Speaker 1 Why didn't he just, why did Jay Gruden just say, why did he pick up his phone? Why would anybody ever go into a 5 o'clock meeting ever for any reason? Maybe he's just there because he's a footballer.

Speaker 1 Whatsoever. Yeah.

Speaker 1 I said in my blog that I wrote yesterday, there are two things that can happen in that meeting. One is you get fired, which sucks.
Two is you're in the office at 5 a.m.

Speaker 1 and you're not fired, which is worse, I think. Then you have a whole rest of the day.

Speaker 1 That's the worst is when you get into work early for any purpose and you get your job done and then you have to wait three more hours for somebody else to come in the office so you can continue working.

Speaker 1 But he just went home. Well, yeah, then he just went home afterwards and he's probably loaded somewhere.
Just having the time on it. Did you say that, man? Just because of those videos? Jake Rudin?

Speaker 1 Yeah. No, because that's what I would be doing.
Yeah, he's just hanging out. Maybe he's not drinking.
Actually, the first day I would pretend that I still had a job.

Speaker 1 I wouldn't tell my wife that I was fired yet if I was Jay. And I'd like pack my suitcase and put on a suit like I was going into work.
Because that's what he worked.

Speaker 1 Can I just go to the library and hang out for a while? She'd be like, why are you wearing a suit? Yeah, I'm going to work. I'm going to work, honey.
You know this. That's what I work.

Speaker 1 But now we have the most dangerous apex predator in all of the animal kingdom out for blood, and that's Dan Snyder looking for a new head coach. Yeah.

Speaker 1 And Leroy reported earlier today that Dan Snyder's plane was in Pittsburgh at the private airport with photo evidence.

Speaker 1 I'm 75% confident in that scoop. Isn't that tampering? No, because so he can trade.
He's trying to trade for Mike Tomlin.

Speaker 1 And if you trade for a head coach, which is,

Speaker 1 I think that's the most excitement that there can possibly be in the NFL with trades, is the very rare head coaching trade. Why would the fuck would Mike Tomlin want to go there?

Speaker 1 Oh, he wouldn't, but he could be traded because he had a contract. But I feel like the Steelers wouldn't do that to him.
Well, a couple things. He worked.

Speaker 1 Anytime you're putting together the pieces on a head coaching search, you always have to be like, oh, he worked with this guy back in the day, and this is where he's from.

Speaker 1 So it checks two boxes because he worked with Bruce Allen when Bruce Allen was working in Tampa Bay. He was an assistant coach down there.

Speaker 1 And then he also went to school at William and Mary, which is like two hours away.

Speaker 1 And he grew up in Virginia, a part of Virginia that now roots for the Panthers, but they used to root for the Arwars. Got it.
So, yeah, he's definitely going there. So, definitely going to be there.

Speaker 1 Yeah, it's a whole shit show. I don't know.
And this also,

Speaker 1 wouldn't you say it's a little premature for the Redskins? Because this is the last pop the Redskins will get all year. Like, firing Jay Gruden was the last time they'll be significant in the news.

Speaker 1 I think you're underestimating Dan Snyder and his ability to get away from it. But that's it, fucking up to the point where it's newsworthy.
But that's your big, that's your big huzzah!

Speaker 1 Like, we got the Monday morning story. You know what I mean? Yeah.
Because they weren't going to get it for any wins or anything. So

Speaker 1 this, this, I feel like if you were Dan Slater, just save that so you have something to look forward to. I think he's going to drag this thing out.

Speaker 1 And then Callahan's probably going to win a couple games. Callahan, by the way, fun fact of the day, who he took over for John and Jay now.

Speaker 1 Took over for John in Oakland, went to the Super Bowl, lost to John when he was in Tampa Bay. This is a serial Gruden cucker.
Yes, he just goes in after the Gruden. So look out.

Speaker 1 If Callahan becomes the permanent head coach for the Redskins, then whoever Jay Gruden goes to, they'll meet in the Super Bowl next year.

Speaker 1 Okay, yeah,

Speaker 1 it took my brain a second to get there. Yes, okay, all right, so lock it in.
Our words are going to the Super Bowl next year. Yes, exactly.
That's all I took away from that conversation.

Speaker 1 But you're right. If you're Mike Tomlin, what would you offer the Steelers to be able to trade a head coach? Nothing because it's the dummy.

Speaker 1 Well, I guess the Redskins have to trade for a head coach because

Speaker 1 they will not get a real head coach. They need somebody who's locked up under contract that they can't break.

Speaker 1 They need a hostage to be a head coach. Because

Speaker 1 if they go to just the free agent market for head coaches, they will only get a head coach that is some young guy who's like, you know what?

Speaker 1 I'm probably never going to be head coach material, so I'm just going to take this one and just cash the check, and then I'll just go back to being a coordinator when I suck.

Speaker 1 Yep, that's exactly where you're going to be. Because no smart guy who's like, I'm destined to be a head coach, would take this job knowing how bad it is.
No smart guy would, but would Greg Sciano?

Speaker 1 Greg Siano's going to take back Rutgers, man. Oh, that's right.
Yeah, leading up prominent. Nunzio Campanelli.

Speaker 1 He's a bridge. Yes, he's a bridge.
All right, let's talk a little baseball.

Speaker 1 So we got Nats Dodgers game five on Wednesday. Natitude is back.
Yeah, Natsude tonight.

Speaker 1 We had the Twins need to just stop. I feel bad for them.

Speaker 1 I really do. They have lost, was it, 15 straight postseason games?

Speaker 4 All of Minnesota is like their borderline the most cursed sports city.

Speaker 1 I've said that. I've said that.
They are low-key, the saddest sports city. When you actually, like, people always go to Cleveland or Buffalo.
It's Atlanta and Minnesota have that under the radar.

Speaker 1 Because they have all

Speaker 1 four major teams.

Speaker 1 They all cursed. They had Kevin Garnett in his prime.
They had one of the best teams of all time. This sounds really mean to just say this out loud.

Speaker 1 One of the best teams of all time to not win a Super Bowl with the Randy Moss, Chris Carter, and Dante Culpepper. Or no, it was

Speaker 1 that wasn't

Speaker 1 Dante yet, but it was Randy Moss. Warren Moon, no, no.
Chris Carter. No, no,

Speaker 1 Randall Cunningham. They lost to Atlanta in the NFC Championship game.
Battled the Anderson kickers. 15-1.

Speaker 1 They were 0-4 in the Super Bowl. They did have Kirby Puckett in the early 90s.
But yeah, it's... And then they got their hockey team stolen in their state of hockey.
That's right.

Speaker 1 They lost a hockey team. In the state of hockey.
They lost a hockey team to Texas. Yes.
That's in the debate. That's hockey.
That's awful.

Speaker 1 So, yes, I feel bad for all Minnesota fans. It sucks.
If you can be underratedly shitty, they are

Speaker 1 Minnesota cursed for what they are. They're passive-aggressively doomed as a state.

Speaker 1 Oh, don't forget the fact that, and this is really piling on, that the rival who beat them all the time in Brett Favre came to the Vikings, took him to the NFC championship game where he got the shit kicked out of him, and Adrian Peterson fumbled because he ate the French fries beforehand.

Speaker 1 Also, Blair Walsh. Blair Walsh.

Speaker 1 Let's stop doing this because because it's making it. So 15 straight postseason games and 12 of them to the Yankees.

Speaker 1 This is all I'm going to say for Minnesota, and I hope this happens. I hope that the sports gods in some

Speaker 1 act of kindness at some point in history lets this reverse and you win a World Series by beating the Yankees in a thrilling ALCS.

Speaker 1 Or you beat the Yankees like six years in a row. Because really, when you're that down, all you have to look forward to is some ridiculous reversal of fortune on everything.

Speaker 1 Maybe if it's got to be post-Kirk Cousins, but I would like to see the Vikings win a Super Bowl at some point. With Kirk Cousins.
With Kirk Cousins as

Speaker 1 not as a quarterback, as a holder. As a holder.
As a coach. As a holder.
That's making $90 million guaranteed.

Speaker 1 I have given, I'm making it my duty to give out pinstripes as the Yankees go along in these playoffs. So just an update: I gave pinstripes to DJ LeMayhew on Friday night.

Speaker 1 I didn't watch Saturday because there was football on. And then Monday, I'm giving it to Glaver Torres.
Okay. So, that's who's got their pinstripes so far.

Speaker 1 Those are the only two to earn them this postseason? Yep. How can you give pinstripes to somebody in a postseason series against the Twins, though, as Yankees?

Speaker 1 To quote Chris Rock: Listen, don't what you want? What you want, a cookie? Don't yell at them. Isn't that what you're supposed to do? Good job not going all the way there.
Yeah,

Speaker 1 don't

Speaker 1 debate me on my pinstripe. It's so great because actual Yankee fans are starting to debate me on my pinstripes giving out.
They're like, dude, Claber had his pinstripes like months ago.

Speaker 1 It's like, listen, man, I don't give pinstripes for regular shit. Well, that's what you're doing.
That's pinstripes in your book. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Personal pinstripes. To go back to queer eye for the straight.
Yeah, you're the queer eye that's handing out pinstripes. Right.
You're like, hey, the horizontal stripes look very slow.

Speaker 1 What about Rudy Giuliani? Does he have his pinstripes yet? No, they've been taken away. What about his horizontal ones? Ooh, Chris Christie's.
Oh, there you go. Is Chris Christie?

Speaker 1 Yeah, he's definitely a Yankees fan.

Speaker 1 I was thinking Cowboys, but of course he's a Yankees fan because he's a Cowboys fan.

Speaker 1 Okay, so, and then let's see. Yadi is

Speaker 1 whatever. Yadi was throwing bats.
He was throwing bats. He was doing throw.

Speaker 1 That, I will say, for the Cardinals Braves series, I love when playoff series get contentious and guys truly hate each other.

Speaker 1 I guess Acunya did the throat slash after game three, and then Yadi did it back to him, throwing bats. I mean, Yadi is the, the, like, the,

Speaker 1 he is just everything about the Cardinals, like, dark magic that they have in the playoffs. There were some takes out there about Acunya saying that he's ruining baseball.

Speaker 1 Well, his own fucking teammates called him out because he hot dogged it. And it's, hey, if there's a time to hot dog it, it's not in the playoffs.
So that will be fun game five. That'll be really fun.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 How about the natural? Chop his back. You want to talk about the natitude real quick? Because we got Strasberg on the bump tonight.
And he, I'm very, very confident.

Speaker 1 Strasburg, the Nationals probably would have won a World Series. I'm actually retroactively handing them the 2012 World Series where they shut Strasburg down in mid-September.

Speaker 1 So they got one under the belt, but he is an awesome postseason pitcher. Are you not worried about Walker Bueller being equally, if not more awesome? Walker Bueller? No, not at all.

Speaker 1 Okay, that's not taking that a little lightly. He's not Strasburg.
I think you're taking

Speaker 1 that a little bit lightly there, buddy. Listen, the Nats are a better team without Bryce Harper.
Yes. That's a fact.
It is a fact.

Speaker 1 Well, no, it's not until they win a real series.

Speaker 1 Well, they did. No, a real series.
Once they had a real series.

Speaker 1 If they win this series, I will 100% buy into that take, but they have to win a real series.

Speaker 1 I just want to say with Soto, I fucking love Juan Soto when he doesn't swing his bat. When he takes a pitch and he does the shuffle, stares at the pitcher, and grabs his nuts.
Yes. It's the best take.

Speaker 1 He's got swag. It's the best take in the business.
Yes, he's got swag. So, oh, by the way, did you see that Sherzer has four adopted dogs dogs all with different color eyes? Yeah.
I love Max Sherzer.

Speaker 1 He's fucking insane. He's so good.
All right.

Speaker 1 Let me do this real quick.

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Speaker 1 Whoa.

Speaker 1 What's up, Coach? Hey, Hugh. Hi, I'm Coach Hugh Jackson here on Pardon, My Take.
Let's do some hot seat, cool throne. First up, Hank.
Let's go. Thanks, Hugh.
Whoa, that was crazy. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Hugh Jackson just walked in the studio. Just walked right out.
He just walked in. Mike Silver's walking out behind him, holding his jackstrap.

Speaker 1 That wasn't a service that you can pay people to make messages on at all.

Speaker 4 Anyway, my hot seat is WWE. Why? Okay.
On Sunday, they had...

Speaker 1 Be careful what you say next.

Speaker 4 They had a pay-per-view, and I guess they built up this guy, The Fiend. They built it up.
He was something new, something different. The fans really liked him.
They were getting behind him.

Speaker 4 They were building him up to have this big match. And then in the pay-per-view on Sunday, they just had him lose very very quickly.
Fans were very upset, they started booing.

Speaker 4 When the thing ended, they were just like going nuts, throwing shit, and people are very upset. WWE fans are very upset.

Speaker 1 Isn't that good, though? Good for business to have the fans so engaged

Speaker 1 up more. Yeah, you gotta really make us earn that nut.

Speaker 4 Their fans are basically, we want something new, we want something different. And they basically just did.

Speaker 4 It looked like they were doing something new, something different, and they kind of just reverted to the same old ways.

Speaker 1 It's like doing Sting's Tantric Sex where you edge, but then like four seconds, then you're like, oh, whoops. Fiend lost.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 4 And then my cool throne is: one is Ben Simmons jumper because he can barely shoot now.

Speaker 1 He can? Yeah. No.
Yeah. Against

Speaker 1 chairs?

Speaker 4 I've seen a few. I mean, there's been a few pre-offseason videos.

Speaker 1 Off-season videos. I just saw one.

Speaker 4 He has his first preseason game tonight, so we'll see if he hits one. You got a single hit one in his first game tonight.

Speaker 1 A three-pointer? No, I don't think so. I think, yes.
I think he will just because he'll probably try to attempt like seven. Wait, is he in China? No.
Okay, this is C word. Okay, he's on Seaward?

Speaker 1 No. Okay, then no.

Speaker 1 And then three pointers.

Speaker 4 My other cool throne is the Knicks.

Speaker 1 Wait, what would be if he was in China? If he's in China, the NBA wants to really put on a show. Got it.
Give them their money, so I'll show you. I'll see your logic.
Yes. The Knicks.

Speaker 4 Kevin Durant was on a... I don't even know where he was on.

Speaker 1 He wasn't on this podcast. Yeah, come on the fucking podcast, Kevin.

Speaker 4 But he was talking shit about the Knicks, saying that's not where anyone wants to be.

Speaker 4 Marcus Morris was on the team, and he basically, like, he's bringing the old Knicks back. He was, like, swung a ball at a guy's head last night.
He says, We're going to bring the old Knicks back.

Speaker 4 And so I just feel like it's one of those things where so many people are shooting on the Knicks constantly that they're going to have to turn it around.

Speaker 4 Unless they're like the Redskins, where it's like, they're never turning it around ever.

Speaker 1 Guess what? Do they have anything? There's a little bit of a common denominator here. I'm fucking shit.
Shithead owner. I'm sick of people hating on James Dolan.
You can't be a James Dolan fan.

Speaker 1 And also a Dan Snyder anti-financed fan. There needs to be, there's a big deal.
Those don't hold BitCat. There needs to be, there's a hole in the the marketplace right now.

Speaker 1 Nobody has branded themselves as a James Dolan defender. Well, I'm going to say.
James Dolan's son, have you seen,

Speaker 1 what do they call him? I think it's disgusting how they.

Speaker 1 Everything's always James Dolan's fault. I'm here to tell you, nobody wants to win more than James Dolan.
What's James Dolan's son's name?

Speaker 1 Deuce. No, but he's a bodybuilder.

Speaker 4 James L. Dolan?

Speaker 1 Oh, his son is James L. Dolan? He's a bodybuilder, and he's like, everyone has been talking about how

Speaker 1 he can lift a million pounds over his head. I think his band's not that bad.
Don't.

Speaker 1 James Dolan's son. All I really want to do, I just want to play guitar in the straight shot.
Yeah, I know. This is a straight shot.

Speaker 1 You can't support this guy. But I'm saying there's a big gap.
Nobody in the world is supporting James Dolan right now. Like I said.
And so he would fall in love with anybody that did.

Speaker 1 There's got to be, he's got to have some family member that still likes him. His dog.
The dog. The family dog still likes James Dolan.
That's for sure. I still like him.

Speaker 4 Also, cool throwing his us. We had 100 NBA scouts at our practice the other day.

Speaker 1 Oh, yes, that's true. Not a big deal.
That's true. All right, PFT, what do you got? My hot seat is Zion.

Speaker 1 What? My hot seat is Zion. Oh, what? I'll tell you why, because they measured him, and he's actually only six foot six.

Speaker 1 But did you see the highlights of his first game? He's shrying about your sight. I don't think that he's going to be able to dunk anymore.
Yeah. He lost all of explosiveness.

Speaker 1 Yeah, it's sad, but I guess uh, the shoes are juiced now. Quentin basketball, Quentin Dolan, Q Dolan, Q Dolan, yeah, Quentin Dolan, he's a fucking big weightlifter.
All right, sorry, go ahead.

Speaker 1 Well, I was just saying, Zion's on the hot seat because I don't think he's going to be able to be an explosive dunker anymore now that he measured in at 6'6.

Speaker 4 His NBA, his first preseason highlights, though, looked somehow like it was like he's in high school. Oh, he's not gonna be able to do this against D1 competition.

Speaker 4 Oh, he's going to NBA, he's not gonna be able to do this against NBA competition. He was doing the same shit, just dunking all over the place.

Speaker 1 Yeah, it looks like he's gonna do the same. It looks like hey,

Speaker 1 I think, guys, I think he can dunk. Still? Even though he's only 6'6 ⁇ ? Yes.
I think what Hank just found out is, and I agree with you, Hank,

Speaker 1 I think Zion can dunk. But you would think with NBA

Speaker 4 playing defense like that.

Speaker 1 But I think we're going to get to that point where we'll be like, wait, I think Zion's just really good at dunking. My other hot seat is Oakland.
Okay.

Speaker 1 So the A's are saying that they are going to consider moving to Las Vegas as well.

Speaker 1 Following the Raiders. Could you imagine how hot those games are going to to be?

Speaker 1 Maybe we'll get the baseball field on the football field again. Yes.
Good. God, that would be so great.
The Raiders would be so massive.

Speaker 1 Dirt follows the Raiders wherever they go. Yes.
My Cool Throne. Well, my Cool Throne was going to be not signing with the Knicks because Kevin Durant made that whole thing.
Was that on a radio show?

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 Who listens to the radio anymore? For all our younger listeners out there, that's a podcast that's broadcast live that your dad hears. Tune in Sirius85 11 to 1 to hear PFT Show on My Show.

Speaker 1 Yeah, so that was my only cool throne. That's a satellite.

Speaker 1 That's satellite. That's true.
Oh, good point. My other cool throne is Mike Tomlin quotes.
Yeah. So I've got, I'm going to do the thing again where I have two fake Mike Tomlin quotes and one real one.

Speaker 1 You tell me which one's real. Okay.
Ready?

Speaker 1 We had red paint, and so we painted our barn red.

Speaker 1 Now maybe yellow. Oh, he added a ring.
You want me to say it again? Yeah. We had red paint, so we painted our barn red.
Now maybe yellow. Okay.

Speaker 1 We're a one and four football team, but it doesn't have to stay that way. Okay.

Speaker 1 I'm not here to respond to speculation about other football teams. If you have a question about the Chargers, we'll embrace that together.
First one is the real one. Is the fake one.

Speaker 1 First one's the real one. Oh, the real one? That's the real one.
He's already done that one. He added he went back.

Speaker 1 So now that they don't have Ben Rothesberger anymore, now that they don't have Mason Rudolph, the reindeer

Speaker 1 barned reindeer.

Speaker 1 Now Duck is the yellow one. I like that.
So he's a yellow duck. I like that.
A little callback joke by Mike Tomlin.

Speaker 1 Okay, my hot seat is this league, this league people on Twitter because Instagram's updating so that you can't see the activity the same way. Is that right?

Speaker 1 So

Speaker 1 what are all the NBA writers going to do? Half of their content is someone follows someone or someone likes someone or someone responds to someone on Instagram. That's a great point.

Speaker 1 What are they going to do?

Speaker 1 This is design. Like, if you are someone who's sitting there and you work at,

Speaker 1 I don't want to say the name of the companies, but if you work at a certain company and you see this, you better start getting your resume ready because your content has been stolen by Instagram.

Speaker 1 I think you have to just, you have to do it yourself the old-fashioned way, some shoe leather journalism, and just make a spreadsheet of who everybody follows at all times and then cross-reference that like five times a day.

Speaker 1 Got it. Okay.
That's good. Someone's going to do it.
Someone absolutely will do it because there's a hole in the marketplace. But that's a big hit on this league.

Speaker 1 And then my cool throne is Gronk because he's back and all of a sudden Gronk is a great speaker of English. So he released a statement.
He said, I'm extremely excited to be joining Fox Sports.

Speaker 1 For the past 25 years, they've offered viewers top-notch NFL programming from the field to the booth to the studio.

Speaker 1 Their deep talent roster is unmatched, which was important for me as I embark on this new chapter in my life because I'll be able to learn from the best in the business.

Speaker 1 That's Rob Gronkowski and his statement. He wrote that, he said it.
He said it, he said it, and then somebody else wrote it down. And then he wrote it after.
He rewrote it.

Speaker 1 I want to see Rob Gronkowski and Terry Bradshaw playing chess. Who the hell thought that this would be

Speaker 1 a statement they could throw out there? How about them just wrestling? Just having them go at it? What do we think? Terry Bradshaw would just get broken in half. Gronk, week.

Speaker 1 So I assume he's going to start this week because they wouldn't have made the announcement. So over under

Speaker 1 week

Speaker 1 nine, he makes a 69 joke on set. Under.
Under. Because it happened right away.

Speaker 4 He's talked about it on this show that he knows it's like run its course, but the people at Fox News will be like, oh, we got Gronk. Let's throw some hilarious 69 jokes at him.

Speaker 1 Oh, wait, he's going on Fox News. Or not Fox News, whatever.
Fox. Yeah, Fox.
That would be Gronkowski and Hannity. Yeah,

Speaker 1 okay. That would be something with the needle.
But yeah, you're right, Hank. You're right.
He's

Speaker 4 going to lay one up for him, and he's going to have no choice

Speaker 1 to make it. Right.
He's going to be like Michael Scott with that. That's what she said.
He's just going to sit there and his brain's going to freeze like 69. He also has a whole new audience.

Speaker 1 Like, I'm assuming he hasn't spent a lot of time with the Fox crew. So now he gets around them and it's just like, hey, guys, you heard this one about what's in between 68 and 70?

Speaker 1 That's going to be his icebreaker for sure.

Speaker 1 What is it? What is the old thing you did?

Speaker 1 Roger Goodell.

Speaker 4 What do you guys think about Roger Goodell?

Speaker 1 I fucking love Gronk. That's going to be awesome.
I don't know how they're going to use him. I hope they use him in the right way.

Speaker 1 I hope they don't put a suit on him and make him be like a stuffy, you know, analyst. I hope they just let Gronk be Gronk.
Do you think they're going to use him as the Rob Wriggle? The funny guy?

Speaker 1 That would be great. Not the Rob Wriggle, the Cooper Manning.
Yes, Cooper Manning. They should just have him just beating the shit out of Cooper Manning.

Speaker 1 That would be worth the money and then some.

Speaker 1 Okay, let's get to our interview. Gary Busey.
It's an all-timer. I'll throw it out there.
It's an all-time pardon-my take interview. He's something else.
We actually,

Speaker 1 so the backstory is because I don't think we talked about it in the show, but I, his

Speaker 1 family

Speaker 1 didn't get their pictures at SeaWorld,

Speaker 1 and I help out with airlines, but I decided to help out with Gary Busey here. And I told him I'd face fuck SeaWorld if we didn't get the pictures.
And then he followed me and I DM'd him.

Speaker 1 And the rest is history, and the rest is Gary Busey coming on this show and blowing our minds. So, before we do all that, quick word from our friends at Velveeta.

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Creaminess. What about how I like to just pop it? Creamy.
You know, when it gets real hot and wet? Yes.

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Speaker 1 Okay, we now welcome on a very special guest. It is Gary Busey.
He is a Hollywood star for decades upon decades. He's in studio.
He's written books. He has his Buseyisms.

Speaker 1 I'm very excited for this interview because you are,

Speaker 1 like I was saying beforehand, in two of my favorite movies, Point Break and Rookie of the Year. And we will get into all of that.
But it's just great to have you. It's great.

Speaker 1 I mean, you are exactly as advertised even walking in here.

Speaker 5 Well, I would like to thank you for giving me the honor and the privilege of coming on your show to speak about what we are going to speak about.

Speaker 1 Right, so which is what? What are.

Speaker 5 Which is what?

Speaker 1 Yeah, what are we planning on speaking about?

Speaker 5 Did you just get here?

Speaker 1 I did, yeah.

Speaker 1 I just arrived this very second.

Speaker 5 Use your imagination, but don't let it get out of control.

Speaker 1 I can't make any promises, but I am also a very big fan of yours. Predator 2 was a great film, The Buddy Holly story.
Under Siege? Under Siege. We could listen to it.
All this goes on, Black Sheep.

Speaker 1 What? Under Siege? Yeah. Yeah.
Yeah. What was it like to work with Stephen Seagal? Well,

Speaker 5 it was different.

Speaker 5 It was different. Yeah.
Just different. I've done,

Speaker 5 I'm not bragging, I've done over 165 projects in film, television, and many series.

Speaker 5 And each one is a different galaxy. Each one is a different phenomenon.
Each one is a different miracle and a blessing. So I take on the work I've been given to do with that kind of attitude.

Speaker 5 And if you don't have anything nice to say about anybody, don't say it because it hurts you more than it does the person you think you're hurting.

Speaker 5 Be kind. Be courageous.
Be accepting with respect.

Speaker 1 Out of all these movies that we list, and then there are so many others, which one is the one that you look back on and you take the most pride in? Wow.

Speaker 5 That would be the Buddy Holly story. Because two months after I finished the movie, I saw it and I realized, and I know in my faith and my belief, Buddy Holly's spirit was singing through me.

Speaker 5 I was the messenger in tribute and honor, Charles Harden Holly. Lived in Lubbock, Texas, in the panhandle of Texas, and the ground is very flat in that part of Texas.

Speaker 5 And you know what's good about living in a town where the ground is flat around you? You can watch your dog run away for two weeks.

Speaker 1 I never thought of it that way.

Speaker 1 He just keeps running.

Speaker 5 Oh, yeah, he didn't stop for two weeks straight.

Speaker 1 So you were born in that area. You were born in Texas and lived in Oklahoma.

Speaker 5 I was born in Goose Creek, Texas, 11.50 a.m.,

Speaker 5 June 29th, 1944, in the Lilly Duke Hospital, delivered by the grandson of Pawnee Bill, who was an Indian scout. My father was in the South Pacific fighting World War II as a CB.

Speaker 5 CBs can do.

Speaker 1 So you were born in the middle of World War II. Not the middle.
Or towards the end. Yeah, towards the end.

Speaker 1 Time in the middle, between the middle and the end. Yeah, somewhere between the middle and the end.
Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 1 Maybe during the third quarter of World War II. Third quarter? Like maybe two minutes left in the third quarter.
Start the fourth. I think once we hit Normandy, we put our fours up.
Yeah, yeah, okay.

Speaker 1 Yeah, so yeah, yeah, you could say, yeah, like 14 minutes left in the fourth quarter.

Speaker 5 You know, I love you guys and your imagination. Because even though your imagination is out of control, it's very good.

Speaker 5 It's incredible.

Speaker 1 Thank you. So you started in music, not acting, right? You started as a drummer and you were trying to, you had a band before you decided to become an actor.
Is that correct?

Speaker 5 Well, it's partially correct because music and acting are the same thing.

Speaker 5 Yeah, I used to get Quaker Oach

Speaker 5 cylinders that were empty and Folger's coffee cans and tin cups and get pencils and play like I was playing drums in the living room in the first grade.

Speaker 5 And my mother would get out of bed and say, stop playing those drums and kick them all.

Speaker 1 You could swear on this. Yeah, fuck.
Fuck. No, no.
Motherfucker. She said, oh, that wasn't your mom boot.

Speaker 1 Your mom beep it. Okay.

Speaker 5 Well, I'm not beeping her. This is what she's saying.

Speaker 1 So you said that acting and music is the same thing. What do you mean by that?

Speaker 5 Well, music is a beautiful thing everyone carries in their heart, in their soul, and their spirit. Music.

Speaker 5 Acting is the absence of acting. It's believing in the truth of the moment you're creating at that time with your heart without thinking.

Speaker 1 Absence is the

Speaker 1 absence of acting.

Speaker 5 It's believing in the truth of the moment you're creating at that instant without thinking.

Speaker 1 So the best actors are really not acting at all. No, God, how can't they?

Speaker 5 I flew back from Tahiti to LAX, and my seat partner was Marlon Brando.

Speaker 5 He said, Gary, you have to remember that life is just a dress rehearsal. Just make it up as you go without thinking, and you'll be fine.

Speaker 1 Thank you, Mark. Good advice.
Oh, boy.

Speaker 1 Have you ever met anybody that doesn't like music, though? There are a few people that I've run into that just don't like music, and I don't really trust them.

Speaker 5 Oh, you don't trust people who don't like music?

Speaker 1 If you say, I don't like music as a blanket statement, to me, that's a red flag. It's kind of a strange thing to say, right?

Speaker 5 You've got to look at what they're not aware of and give them a prayer of understanding the beauty of the music they carry in their heart. Because we all do carry music in our heart.

Speaker 5 We sing to ourselves. We sing the songs we hear on the radio.
And it makes you feel good. Singing a song on the radio, you're in the car driving, you feel like a star.

Speaker 5 But let me tell you what the definition of a star is. A star is nothing but a self-contained mass of gas way up in the sky.

Speaker 5 And they come in at night, and when they twinkle at you, they're saying, I love you.

Speaker 1 Lovely. Neil deGrasse

Speaker 1 right there. Yes, I like that.
That's great.

Speaker 5 Finally, you like something I said.

Speaker 1 Oh, I like everything you said.

Speaker 1 Can we talk about

Speaker 1 your motorcycle accident and the fact that you died for two hours? You were dead for two hours, correct? Did you go to heaven?

Speaker 1 Do you know what heaven looks like?

Speaker 5 I know what it feels like because I have been in the spiritual zone, in the supernatural, surrounded by angels. And my essence was about

Speaker 5 12 inches long long and about a quarter of an inch wide. And that is your soul.
And your soul is housed in the column of your spine.

Speaker 5 So I went off Hardy-Davidson, going 40 miles an hour without a helmet, hit me headfirst into a curb, then my pelvis hit. Split my skull on the right side, knocked a hole in as big as a 50-cent piece.

Speaker 5 They took bones out of my pelvis to fill the hole. I got a dent there.
It was like... playing golf on the wrong course.

Speaker 1 You know, poo, golf ball hit me.

Speaker 5 Anyway, it was a beautiful experience experience of understanding something that I wouldn't have understood without having the accident so I thought hey I'm going to do something about this so I went to Washington and I was John McCain God bless you John McCain Bill First Orrin Hatch Ted Kennedy and talked to them about what happened to my head and I said we have to create something And so I signed a piece of paper and that was the advocate statement that created the Traumatic Brain Injury Act that President Clinton signed in 1996.

Speaker 5 So the motorcycle accident gave me a gift to help save others and wear your helmet.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 That's fantastic.

Speaker 1 I've heard

Speaker 1 some people they go through an experience like that.

Speaker 1 Obviously every day is a gift after that after you come back from an experience where you you come so close to death or in your case you you feel heaven.

Speaker 1 Was there anything that you when you when you came back to when you started going through your rehabilitation process was there any skill or anything that you were able to do after the accident that you weren't able to do before the accident?

Speaker 5 Everything was different in the way I saw life and the way I felt it. And you know what a deja vu is? A deja vu is when your mind picks up something before your brain does.

Speaker 5 Then when your brain picks it up, it's like, I've been here before. This has happened before.
I had what's called, what I call vouge daise.

Speaker 5 And that's something I saw that I'd known I'd seen before, but it was like the first time I was seeing it. A brand new opening to a brand new way of life.
Thank God for the accident.

Speaker 5 And I went and we did the Traumatic Brain Injury Act.

Speaker 5 Now I'm working on making the helmet law mandatory in every state in the union because that computer that sits on our neck controls our whole corporate body being emotionally, mentally, spiritually, and physically.

Speaker 5 Without the computer...

Speaker 1 What are you going to do? Yeah. Yeah.
Nothing. Absolutely.
Absolutely.

Speaker 1 In talking about all your roles in all the movies you've been in, what is the one or two that you always look back and you're like, man, that was the one that I really nailed or I had the most fun doing that one?

Speaker 1 Well,

Speaker 5 the ones I've had the most fun with are all of them.

Speaker 1 But the ones I didn't nail, I didn't nail them.

Speaker 5 They nailed me. That was Buddy Holly.

Speaker 5 There's a movie that I did in England with Nick Rogue, and that went to competition in the Conn Film Festival in France.

Speaker 5 Lethal Weapon, Star is Born, Under Siege,

Speaker 5 Point Break, 1991.

Speaker 1 Yeah, so

Speaker 1 when you did that movie, where you're like, this is going to be awesome, this is going to be a cult classic, because it is.

Speaker 1 Point break is a cult classic in my mind, where people, you know, you see it, and you've even seen it go to, I think people are doing it on stage now, which is almost the true sign of a cult classic.

Speaker 1 They bring it out on stage, they have a point break, too. People talk about it.
It's one of those movies, if you're watching on TV and you see it on, I watch the the whole thing no matter what.

Speaker 1 Don't get off my seat.

Speaker 5 Well, it was a magical movie. And at the end of the movie, Patrick Swayze, God bless you, Patrick Swayze.
Yes.

Speaker 5 We're both from Harris County in Texas. He's Houston.
I'm Goose Creek. He wouldn't let me alone.
He said, you got to go skydiving with me. You'll be perfectly safe.

Speaker 5 You jump out of a perfectly good airplane at 13,000 feet. And you'll face fear and apprehension like you haven't faced before.

Speaker 5 But you've got to shoot, and you open up, shoot, it opens up, and you guide yourself down. Wouldn't let me go every time I turn around.

Speaker 5 Okay, we're going to go to skydiving.

Speaker 5 Stop!

Speaker 5 Finally, shut him up. I said, I give him my word of honor.

Speaker 1 I'll go.

Speaker 5 And when you're from Texas and do that, to me, you're going.

Speaker 5 I picked him up at 4 a.m., went to six hours of ground school, jumped out of a perfectly good airplane, 13,000 feet, fell at 124 miles an hour.

Speaker 1 I fell

Speaker 5 9,000 feet in 55 seconds, opened my chute, whoop, and floated down.

Speaker 1 Championship. Yeah, must have felt pretty good.
With Patrick Swayze. That's pretty cool.
That's pretty damn cool. Yeah.

Speaker 5 Now, he's a soul of my brother of mine.

Speaker 1 Yeah. At the end of that movie.
You hear that? What?

Speaker 1 Yeah, that's the train.

Speaker 5 Yeah. Is that an earthquake?

Speaker 1 My train. Prick Swayze.
There's a train that goes right underneath the studio. We built our recording studio on top of a train station.
Really stupid.

Speaker 5 That's so you can jump out of the window and hit the train, right?

Speaker 1 Right, yeah. Really, really dumb.
I'll catch that cherry right now. Yeah, right.
Exactly. exactly.

Speaker 5 You guys are smarter than you look.

Speaker 1 No, we're not much dumb. I appreciate that.
I appreciate that. Yeah.

Speaker 5 No, it's such an honor to be here with you. It's such an honor to be on your show with you.
You're both beautiful souls and wonderful people.

Speaker 5 You've got the greatness of love and consideration in your heart to talk about what we're talking about and why I'm here to talk. It's about a play I'm doing called Only Human.

Speaker 1 Yes. St.

Speaker 5 Clements Theater.

Speaker 5 Only Human has four characters. The boss, which is God, that's me.

Speaker 1 Mary Magdalene, Kim.

Speaker 5 Lucifer, Marco Scilante.

Speaker 5 And Jay.

Speaker 1 Okay. Who?

Speaker 1 Evan Malpey. Evan Malpe.

Speaker 1 Is that Jesus? Jay?

Speaker 5 Yeah, that's Jay. Jesus Jay, yeah.
Okay.

Speaker 1 Okay. And it is a funny...

Speaker 5 musical, but it has the spirit that will come to you softly and funny-like. funny-like, and you will go in there.
I'm not acting. I'm believing.

Speaker 1 Right.

Speaker 5 There's no acting required here.

Speaker 1 Is there any difference between acting on stage and acting in front of a camera, whether it's TV or a movie? What different, you know, how do you approach those two different styles in separate ways?

Speaker 1 Well, I had a good

Speaker 5 miracle happen to me. I studied camera technique and film awareness with Mr.
James Best. God bless James Best, the name of the Savior Jesus Christ.
He's gone, but not really for me.

Speaker 5 And he taught us how to work on the set. And this, huh?

Speaker 1 You're talking like this to reach the background so they can hear you.

Speaker 5 Well, movies you got a mic. You're going, hey, I want to talk to you about something that's important to you.

Speaker 1 They hear you.

Speaker 5 And it's soft. It's slow.
It's moving. When you're in a close-up on a screen, your face is 12 feet wide.
So

Speaker 5 the thing you don't want to do is do this.

Speaker 5 Rub your lips. Because your finger comes across.
Your finger is eight feet long and

Speaker 5 it goes across your mouth, and you're missing the point of the actor's dialogue. It's fun, it's great.
It's all the same, but yet it's not. And that's the great thing about life.

Speaker 5 Life L-I-F-E stands for living in forever eternity.

Speaker 5 It's not ever.

Speaker 1 We've got to get to the beesyisms in a minute. You have the book here, too.
But I wanted to ask you a question about

Speaker 1 James Best. No.
Okay.

Speaker 1 I actually listened to some other interviews you did before this one, and you told a story about your first job and what James Best told you to make sure you do on your first job.

Speaker 1 And I thought it was a really good life lesson for most people. Can you tell that story about how you basically walked around and said, hey, okay, don't tell it.
I won't tell you.

Speaker 1 Don't tell it, Shelby. You go.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 5 He said, the first day when you're going to set, walk around to the head of every department, camera, grips, props, electricity, sound.

Speaker 5 and tell them, I'm really excited to be here. It's my first day of working.
And if there's anything I can do for you, let me know.

Speaker 5 I had one day of work with no dialogue. I ended up with three days of work with seven lines, just because I paid attention to the other person's feelings before thinking about me and my faults.

Speaker 5 Don't think about your faults when you're doing art, or the art won't come true in you. Art is only the search.
It's not the final form. It is unlimited.
And it's beautiful.

Speaker 5 And Jimmy put me in a great place to step into the career climbing a ladder I already knew how to climb.

Speaker 1 I love that story just because it's a great lesson to everyone. Like, hey, when you have your first break, when you get your first chance, don't just take the chance.
Go beyond that.

Speaker 1 You know what you should get more out of it.

Speaker 5 You're not taking the chance. You're giving your chance to others to let them know you are so proud of them being with you because without you, I wouldn't be able to do what I'm going to do.

Speaker 1 It's almost like a karma thing.

Speaker 1 The more positive energy, the more

Speaker 1 karma.

Speaker 1 The more you're willing to help somebody else,

Speaker 1 the more they're going to look for you to be the first person to give help to.

Speaker 5 Yeah, that's right. When you tell them, I'll do anything to help you, hey, let's help this dude.

Speaker 1 God,

Speaker 5 they've never had that said to them.

Speaker 5 That's what they told me. Nobody's ever come up and told us, whatever I can do for you, let me know.
Right. And that's giving love.

Speaker 1 Because they're behind the scenes people, and they don't usually get that from the actors.

Speaker 5 Well, behind-the-scenes people doesn't mean they're behind the scenes. That means what they do behind the scenes is in the scene, on the scene, and you can see it, feel it, hear it, and love it.

Speaker 5 Exactly, Hank.

Speaker 1 That's true. That's our producer.
Our producer said, Hank will do whatever you need. Hank, except for being on your fantasy football podcast, because we didn't get Friends.

Speaker 1 We didn't get Team of the Week one week. What kind of hat is that?

Speaker 1 Friends Bar. It's a bar in Louisiana.
Baton Rouge.

Speaker 1 Hey, good luck. Tiger Louise.
Yeah. It's one of the best bars of all time.

Speaker 5 Do you know what bar stands for, B-A-R?

Speaker 1 No.

Speaker 1 Buy another round.

Speaker 1 All right, let's talk about Beaucyism.

Speaker 1 So, your book, Praise for Buseisms.

Speaker 1 Yeah, okay. I love Buseisms.
Explain how Buseism started. Well, I was writing a journal.

Speaker 5 I've been betrayed to my heart.

Speaker 5 And I was writing about what happened to me. And I was,

Speaker 5 and I realized, hey, this is in the past. Where am I now? Now, okay, now, NOW.
That stands for no other way.

Speaker 5 The first BUCISM I wrote, I was recovering from a traumatic brain injury, and the hospital, the doctors put me in a smock, gave me a clipboard to take me on rounds so I'd feel like they told me I was going to be playing the doctor in the next movie.

Speaker 5 So I did, okay. And I would scribble things that you couldn't read, and I went to a drawer, the patient opened it up, underwear and socks, all messed up.
So I rearranged it, and I said, that is neat.

Speaker 5 My first musism was neat, nice, exciting, and tight.

Speaker 5 And then came the others, and they kept kept coming, they kept coming. Faith, F-I-I-T-H, fantastic adventures and trusting him.

Speaker 5 Hope, H-O-P-E.

Speaker 5 Heavenly offerings prevail eternally. Relationship, R-E-L-A-T-I-O-N-S-H-I-P.

Speaker 5 Really exciting love affair turns into overwhelming nightmare.

Speaker 1 Sobriety hangs in peril.

Speaker 5 Romance, R-O-M-A-N-C-E, stands for Relying on Magnificent magnificent and necessary compatible energy.

Speaker 1 That's a really good one.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 Simple. Can we?

Speaker 1 Yeah, go ahead. Simple.
No, no, simple. Go.
Simple.

Speaker 5 S-I-M-P-L-E stands for See It Manifesting Precious, Loving Energy.

Speaker 5 So just be simple. You get sweet.
The eyes connect. There's a laser on the eyes.
The hands touch. The hands start sweating.
And the rest is up to you.

Speaker 1 Fun.

Speaker 1 Fun.

Speaker 5 F-U-N. Finally understanding nothing.

Speaker 1 That's great. Yeah.

Speaker 1 That's really fun.

Speaker 1 Because

Speaker 1 once you realize you don't understand anything, you're just having a great time. You're just like, there it is.
You laugh. This is great.
Yeah. You laugh.
What about

Speaker 1 sober? Sober. Sober.

Speaker 5 Sober. S-O-B-E-R.

Speaker 1 Son of a bitch. Everything's real.

Speaker 1 That's perfect. Do you have one for Gary?

Speaker 5 Oh, gosh. I don't do proper names.

Speaker 1 What about football?

Speaker 5 But I do BUCY. Can't you do B-U-S-E-Y.

Speaker 5 Being under spiritual energy yearly.

Speaker 1 I like that. Can you do football?

Speaker 5 Football. I play football.

Speaker 1 Football. If you were to make that a BUCism.
Finding other offers, trusting,

Speaker 5 believing,

Speaker 5 and

Speaker 1 living

Speaker 1 love.

Speaker 1 you can just rattle them off. It's like going, you know, to the jukebox and throwing in a dollar and just being like, let's get a billion dollars.

Speaker 5 Don't forget to bring your junk box money.

Speaker 1 I did see that you played Bear Bryant back in the Zooms.

Speaker 1 What was that like playing Bear?

Speaker 5 I'd like to welcome you all to the Alabama football program.

Speaker 5 There's 120 of you here.

Speaker 5 And down on the go-line, you'll see six footballs. Now, when babes

Speaker 1 change Starling here, the coach blows a whistle.

Speaker 5 I want you to go down there and give me a football. But BAM! It looked like the Battle of Algiers for 15 minutes.
Leroy Jordan, freshman, he came back with four footballs.

Speaker 5 And Bear looked at him and said, I don't even think this boy has to practice.

Speaker 5 Leroy Jordan and Billy Neighbors, All-American Guard, were not allowed in contact drills because every time they hit somebody, that person had to go to medical relief. So they saved it for the game.

Speaker 5 Bear is fishing with Duffy Doherty, Cochin, Michigan. Duffy, you know, people around here in Alabama think I can walk on water.
And Duffy said, well, here we are.

Speaker 5 Try it.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 5 Stepped on the water,

Speaker 5 sunk. got up and said, if you ever tell anybody you see this, I'll take away your whiskey.

Speaker 5 And then Barry said, why don't we get this over with quick?

Speaker 5 Here, I got some dynamite.

Speaker 5 Boom. About 18 fish loaded up.
They took them in. Don't tell anybody we use dynamite.

Speaker 1 Okay, let's go home and eat them.

Speaker 1 So you played football. You played football

Speaker 1 in college, right? You had a scholarship?

Speaker 5 I played football grade school, junior high, high school, junior college, college, scholarship shower. Then I hurt my knee,

Speaker 5 lost my football scholarship in Transfer to Oklahoma State University, and majored in theatrical art.

Speaker 1 Did you love football? Did you love playing football when you were doing it? I still do.

Speaker 5 My dad was an all-American in high school. So, boy, I followed dad's shoes, you know.

Speaker 5 I never made that, but dog gone and I was good. Yeah.
Because I believed in myself and doing it. And that's what you must do.

Speaker 5 Whatever you're doing, however you feel about it, believe in yourself first. And your belief will come true in you to accomplish achievement you know you can do.

Speaker 1 Have you ever run into a situation where

Speaker 1 you start to lose that belief in yourself and you have to find out a way how to get it back? No, I always have the way to get it back.

Speaker 5 Just believe in yourself and be truthful with your heart. Hang on a minute.

Speaker 1 Bless you.

Speaker 5 I coughed at this.

Speaker 1 I retract my bless you. No, don't do that.
Okay, then bless you again. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Bless you. Bless you.
Bless you. You corrected my bless you, though, so I felt like I I needed to.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 It's confusing. You're blessed.

Speaker 1 As a minister, I'm a minister. Oh, you are.
You're blessed, sir.

Speaker 5 What is your ordinance?

Speaker 1 Universal Church of the Life.

Speaker 5 What is that?

Speaker 1 It's a registered ministry that I'm a minister of.

Speaker 5 Is that as your house?

Speaker 1 It could be anywhere. It's everywhere.

Speaker 1 The beautiful thing about it is it's universal, so it could be anywhere. How would you rate our spiritual energy as a duo and maybe just in the podcast room?

Speaker 1 I think it's great.

Speaker 5 I think it's all great because you own it, you have it, and you don't have to stand on the box and pontificate.

Speaker 1 I see the light.

Speaker 5 You don't have to do that because I feel your spirit. I feel it's rich.
I feel it's full. I feel it's loving.

Speaker 5 And

Speaker 5 yeah, that's my truth. And my truth is the truth because I'm playing God in the play called Only Human.

Speaker 1 Only Human. You got to be human.

Speaker 1 When is it? When does it start? We're going to come.

Speaker 1 When? October 8th. October 8th.
October 8th. St.
Clement Theater.

Speaker 1 Clements.

Speaker 1 What? St. Clements Theater.

Speaker 5 St. Clement's Theater, October the 8th.

Speaker 1 We're going to go to it.

Speaker 5 No, you have to go and bring your friends and put it in.

Speaker 1 If we come,

Speaker 1 can we be considered one of your friends? Like when we show up, will you be like, oh, those are our guys? That's what I'm doing.

Speaker 5 Let me tell you this, buddy.

Speaker 5 You are forever my friend.

Speaker 1 Hell yes. In the past, 423 West 46th Street.
That's where it is. Yeah.
Yep. Forever in the crew.
We're going.

Speaker 5 What I'd like to ask you to do from my heart of truth, advertise the play.

Speaker 1 Yes.

Speaker 1 We're going to go and review it, and we're going to give you five stars. That's five.
What about it's actually balls system. Five balls.

Speaker 1 We rake everything on the ball system. Balls? Yeah.

Speaker 5 What happened to you when you were young?

Speaker 1 A lot of stuff. Balls, yeah.
A lot of stuff.

Speaker 5 Were you walking on a trailer and slipped and fell and

Speaker 1 boom?

Speaker 1 Something is wrong with all of our brains. I agree.
With your brain, something's wrong? Yeah, I mean, I'd say to do what we do, there's something got to be a little off, right?

Speaker 5 No, something's great about your brain. Something's full about your brain.
Something's wonderfully loving about your brain.

Speaker 1 I think the stuff that makes our brains different makes them good. Like, I think we have very unusual brains, but if you learn to love that your brain is unusual, it actually becomes an asset.

Speaker 5 You know, that's true because every one of us individually in our own personal being, are different.

Speaker 5 And that's what makes it interesting, loving, and happy. Because everybody's different from you.
That doesn't mean they're better. That doesn't mean they're worse.

Speaker 5 That means there's something of their own galaxy that gives you love and gives you something to understand and see that you can't just understand and see by dealing with yours.

Speaker 5 Let everybody come into your heart. Let all the galaxies come into your heart and give them love and understanding for who they are, what they are, how they are, and when they are.

Speaker 1 I have a, this might be a dumb question for somebody who's as an accomplished actor as yourself, but I've always just wondered how how professional actors memorize their lines.

Speaker 1 Is it in front of a mirror? Do you read them through? Do you say them out loud?

Speaker 5 You just remind me.

Speaker 5 James Best told me the power of cold reading is you take this, you know, you're given, okay, go out and look at those three pages and come back in in six minutes, you'll do the pages.

Speaker 5 So I go out and take the six pages and read my lines to myself without emotions. Don't read the lines being said to you.
Just look at them. 25 times.

Speaker 5 You go back in and put the script on the table and walk to the room and point something on the wall and say, this is beautiful. The director says, my daughter made me that.

Speaker 5 And the installmaster, the cashing yard say, Gary, you ready? I circled behind the director, giving him the first line,

Speaker 5 all the way through it.

Speaker 5 Because I had it in my heart. Doesn't mean I remembered it perfectly, but my feelings of the line I was saying were there forever.

Speaker 1 Cull reading.

Speaker 5 Acting. I told you what it is.
It's the absence of acting.

Speaker 5 It is when you're, but that's okay. It's okay.
I'm not judging anything. If you judge, you will be judged.

Speaker 1 What was it like doing entourage?

Speaker 5 A TV show was wonderful. Larry Charles, who ran it, organized it, created it, I went there and said,

Speaker 5 where's my script? He said, you're the script.

Speaker 1 What?

Speaker 5 Just make it up you go.

Speaker 5 Hey, that's my forte. Yeah.
So I did the three shows we did, and it was wonderful. Then four years later, they made a movie.
And I did the movie. And that's what it was.
It was wonderful.

Speaker 5 And that's that with Entourage.

Speaker 1 Yeah, you get to play yourself.

Speaker 5 Yeah, that's what I do all the time. Even though I'm in a costume, makeup, and different hairdo or whatever, myself is beginning the artisticness of the character I am playing.

Speaker 5 Therefore, the character becomes me.

Speaker 1 No acting required.

Speaker 1 That's like a beautiful life hack for acting. A life hack? Yeah.
What's a life hack? It's like what you're saying. Like instead of acting, you just be yourself.
Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 1 Just what millennials call a trick.

Speaker 5 Think of yourself with the innocence of yourself when you were nine years old. You're not acting, you're just being you.

Speaker 5 And that's the grand slam home run and the target hitting in Zen and the art of archery.

Speaker 1 I like that. I think I actually peaked when I was nine years old.
You peaked? That was my, well, yeah, as an athlete especially, because then everybody grew and I didn't grow.

Speaker 5 What were you peaking at?

Speaker 1 Basketball, baseball, football, soccer. What position you play in? Golf, fullback, wide receiver, kicker.

Speaker 5 Were you a good runner?

Speaker 1 No.

Speaker 5 Did you snap anybody's sternum? Never.

Speaker 1 My own. Did you snap anybody's sternum? Yeah.

Speaker 5 It's a hobby.

Speaker 1 What position did you play?

Speaker 5 I played center, guard, and linebacker.

Speaker 1 Okay. So, yeah, you definitely snapped some sternum.

Speaker 5 I could snap a football 30 yards into a bushel basket.

Speaker 1 Damn.

Speaker 1 That's pretty good. That's pretty good.
That's pretty good.

Speaker 5 What is your favorite thing you did in your life watching movies? What inspired you to do what you did after you saw a great movie?

Speaker 5 Which one was it?

Speaker 5 The exception of mine?

Speaker 1 When I saw the hangover, I decided to go out and get drunk. I would say best of the best two.

Speaker 1 I wanted to be

Speaker 1 like an underground martial artist. And I saw that when I was probably 26.
So it was probably a little late. But yeah.
What was the name of the movie? Best of the best two.

Speaker 1 Oh, okay.

Speaker 1 Wayne Newton was in it. The Coliseum.
He has people come in there and they fight for rich people. Wayne Newton? Yeah.

Speaker 1 Donkey Shank. Yes, yes.
Oh,

Speaker 4 Donkey Shank.

Speaker 1 Point break made me want to rob Banks.

Speaker 1 For sure did.

Speaker 5 Best way to rob Banks in the daylight is wear a tie, like Nicole Miller would make, a tie that's so garish. And they go to the teller, detectives, and say, what do you look like?

Speaker 1 I don't remember that, but his tie was just such a fat.

Speaker 5 This was told of me by a guy who really did that, and and he just got out of prison he was on the set i was doing a movie with dustin hoffman my son jake when he was five straight time

Speaker 1 i feel like i'm talking too much about me no this is not no no no this is a play called only human yes we're almost advertised that every day and we're all gonna go see it we're gonna see you have to bring everybody you don't know too okay but how do i how would i bring somebody that i don't know god look at new york streets just walk around the streets and tell people but then i know them we got to give them cards

Speaker 1 well no we're doing that right now This podcast is telling all the people we don't know to come and see the play.

Speaker 5 Don't tell them you don't know them.

Speaker 1 No, I love them. No, we know them.
They know us. We don't know them maybe specifically.

Speaker 5 No, you know them. You know their hearts.
That's true. So they're hearing you and they love it.
Take the cards. We gave you some cards.
You give them out to people.

Speaker 5 It says, only human. It's worse plans.
Winners plan.

Speaker 5 And it's lovely. You'll come in there happy and you'll leave happier.
I like that. You'll come in there.
I don't know what I'm going to see here and you'll leave.

Speaker 1 God, that was great.

Speaker 1 Tell everybody about this play, only human.

Speaker 5 You hear that out there, guys?

Speaker 5 Guys and girls, only human.

Speaker 1 Okay, I have one last question about only human.

Speaker 1 So every single week, how long does the play run for? For three years.

Speaker 1 Jesus Christ.

Speaker 1 So how many times a week do you do it?

Speaker 5 We do five performances a day. No, I do it every night except Wednesday.

Speaker 1 Okay. Saturday? Yeah.
So each night that you're doing it, right? So you're doing it five, six times a week, let's say. Do you try to do something a little bit different in each performance?

Speaker 5 Oh, no. You stay with what's written.
You stay with what the director desires you to do. Don't go against a grain of their soul or you're missing the point of the message of the play.

Speaker 5 And I learned that when I did Midsummer Night's Dream, Shakespeare.

Speaker 5 Oh, unrhymed ammic pintamater with no punctuation. That guy is funny.
Yeah, Billy.

Speaker 1 He's funny. Billy Shakespeare.
Yeah, he knew how to write.

Speaker 5 Well, he was born on April 23rd, and 53 years later, he died on April 23rd. So 2 and 3 is 5, 2 and 3 is 5, 5 and 5 is 10.
10 is the number of accomplishment, achievement, and a new challenge.

Speaker 1 Interesting.

Speaker 5 It's so interesting. You need to write it down, put it on your refrigerator.

Speaker 1 That's like the mind-blowing. Yeah, we need to have that transcribed, put on a quote card, because I don't think I'm going to be able to absorb it right now.
Say that again.

Speaker 5 five and two and three is five five and five is ten ten is the number of challenge new changes and accomplishments and that's Billy you know when you accomplish an achievement

Speaker 5 you get a new mark on your heavenly belt of goodness grace loving

Speaker 5 that's all that's what life's about with goodness grace loving acceptance and respect all you guys out there listening to me I'm glad you're listening to me and I'm going to meet you one day, so every one of you are required to come to see the play, only human.

Speaker 1 All right.

Speaker 1 Go ahead. Do you believe in hell?

Speaker 1 Hell. Yeah.
Hell? Yeah.

Speaker 5 Hell is what you make it within yourself.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 1 So

Speaker 1 hell is a self-imposed condition.

Speaker 5 Well, it's something that's created by men who wrote the Bible. It's created by...

Speaker 5 Hell is really something you create yourself.

Speaker 5 The difference between organized religion and spirituality is organized religion is a built for people to be afraid of hell. Spirituality is for people who have been there.
I'm in the second group.

Speaker 1 I cause my own hell.

Speaker 5 Everyone can cause their own hell, just know how to get out of it, come to the light, and say, thank you, God.

Speaker 1 That's very insightful. Thank you.

Speaker 1 All right. Only human.
Yeah. Gary Busey, thank you for coming by.
We'd love to to have you back on. Maybe we'll go see the play and then have you back on at the end of the run

Speaker 5 in three years. Dismiss the word maybe.

Speaker 1 No, we are going to see it.

Speaker 1 Yeah, so you'll be back on. How long are you going to be in this play? Three years?

Speaker 5 Maybe four.

Speaker 1 What is it? Through December 15th. Through December 15th.
So October 8th through December 15th.

Speaker 1 We're going to see it during that time, and then we're going to have you back on before you leave New York, and we'll talk about the play some more and even more.

Speaker 1 I mean, people are going to love this interview.

Speaker 5 You know, this play is being worked on, has been being worked on for eight and a half years. Jeez.
And this is coming to a beautiful mountain of spiritual miracles and blessings.

Speaker 1 I love it. We're going to take a field trip, the whole crew.
We seriously are. It's been too long since we're going to

Speaker 1 have a mountain of spiritual miracles. We're going to take a field trip.

Speaker 5 You need to hold them up to this partner. Yep.

Speaker 1 Hank, why don't you have a trip? We're going for mountains of spiritual blessings. And then we're going to have you back on, and we're going to talk about how great you were.

Speaker 5 No, don't talk about how great I am because we already know that. Let's talk about how great the play was.

Speaker 1 That too. That too.

Speaker 1 All right.

Speaker 1 Gary PC.

Speaker 1 Oh, you guys are so funny.

Speaker 1 Oh, wait, wait. Yes.
Here. And the book.

Speaker 1 Yes.

Speaker 5 This book is for you, Dan.

Speaker 1 Thank you. Read what I wrote.
Oh, wow. Look at this.

Speaker 1 Thank you for your blessing in every way.

Speaker 5 This book is for you, Eric.

Speaker 1 Thank you. There we go.
Read what he wrote. Thank you.
I'll give that to my brother. You wrote the same thing.
Read what he wrote. Yep.

Speaker 5 Read yours.

Speaker 1 Thank you for the blessing in every way. God blessed you.
Oh, you got God blessed. God bless you when you were born.
Hey, oh, Gary, Heart, Gary Busce. I don't know who's got the better one.

Speaker 1 That's very sweet.

Speaker 1 I mean, I don't know how much more of a soul we could put on this play other than like, go watch Gary Busey. No, I know.
I mean, this is incredible. Yeah.
I know. No, that's great.
No, we're going.

Speaker 1 We're going.

Speaker 5 We need to cancel the next guest. I'm not leaving.

Speaker 1 Okay. Okay.
Perfect. You want to watch football all day? We're going to watch football all day.
Football? Yeah, we're going to watch it all day.

Speaker 5 I don't blame you. All right.

Speaker 1 Gary Busey, thank you so much. Thank you.

Speaker 5 And come see the play on the Hubot.

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Speaker 1 It starts with a shot of proper number 12 Irish whiskey because real friends don't let friends Irish exit a party without a story to tell.

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Mix it up with some ginger ale for a classic and refreshing proper ginger.

Speaker 1 In the mood for something smooth but a little sweeter, try proper Irish apple, a delicious blend of proper's award-winning Irish whiskey with crisp, fresh notes of apple.

Speaker 1 So get out there and make your Irish entrance. Anything else just wouldn't be proper.

Speaker 1 Okay, let's wrap up with a couple segments. We have Guys on Chicks with Uncle Chaps coming up.
We'll start with some PR 101 for the NBA. Boy, have they stepped in it.

Speaker 1 Yeah, they're in an interesting spot. Steve Kerr.
Unlike us. Yeah, unlike us, because we've already had our task force working on this for two days now.

Speaker 1 Steve Kerr came out and had a statement and basically was like, I don't know enough about it, which is cool if you're a podcaster because we do that all the time. Honestly, probably true.

Speaker 1 Yeah, because it's a very complicated situation, so much so.

Speaker 1 I'm putting this topic on our exempt list, our commissioner's exempt list, where we will get around to addressing it, but we don't have to for the next six months.

Speaker 1 And it's actually not complicated until I find out who won. It's not complicated at all because Steve Kerr, all he had to say is, hey guys, it's not complicated at all.

Speaker 1 My boss told me that we make a shitload of money in China, so I will now say I don't understand it, and please stop asking me. Right.

Speaker 1 So there is one thing that I think people should understand about the NBA players and the coaches being over in China, as well as, like, I know ESPN's over there, Rachel Nichols is doing a whole thing over there.

Speaker 1 The fact that they're not speaking out in favor of the Hong Kong protesters and against the NBA cracking down on Daryl Maury.

Speaker 1 I think they should get a little bit of a pass on it because they are in China right now.

Speaker 1 And would you want to be the person over there right now talking shit about the Chinese government when you're walking the streets of China? And you have to be out in public there.

Speaker 1 Well, but they won't say anything when they come back. Well, if they do, that's one thing.
No, they're not going to say anything when they come back because this is the checks.

Speaker 1 And that's what we talked about on Sunday.

Speaker 1 They're not going to say anything when they come back. I'm saying while you're over there, I understand not wanting to speak out against the Chinese government.

Speaker 1 They will not say anything when they come back. They're going to just do the same thing, and that's fine.

Speaker 1 I would prefer if they just said our money is paid in large part by China and all these people buying league pass, and it's a big fucking country, and we're trying to sell a shitload of Kobe jerseys.

Speaker 1 So, therefore, we are going to remove ourselves from this discussion. And guess what? At least I would be honest.

Speaker 1 You know, I mean, you could say it's hypocritical because the NBA is pushing human rights everywhere except for when it hurts their bottom dollar. And I wouldn't disagree with you.

Speaker 1 At this point, though, if they just admitted, hey, we don't want to hurt our bottom dollar anymore, like, guess what? That's how the world works.

Speaker 1 We'll let the Shanghai Sharks weigh in on DC statehood. That'll be our little tit-for-tat with them.
Yes, there we go. Perfect.

Speaker 1 You get to talk whatever shit you want about taxation without representation, and we get to mention Hong Kong once a year. Right.
Perfect. Done.
Done. Done.
Handshake.

Speaker 1 Or they can just be a little bit more than a hundred. So we just PR one of them over in Saudi Arabia.
Yeah, we got it. WWE does.
We're good. All right, so we have PMT Sports Biz Minute.

Speaker 6 Good morning, this is Jake Marsh with a PMT Sports Biz Minute. Week five in the NFL included some all-time fantasy performances across the league.

Speaker 6 In PPR formats, Will Fuller put up 54 points, Aaron Jones with 49, and Christian McCaffrey posted 48. The birth of fantasy football dates back to 1962.

Speaker 6 A man by the name of Bill Wink Winkenback invented and played fantasy golf and baseball in the 1950s, and the football version eventually followed.

Speaker 6 As for when people started to care for your fantasy team, well the answer to that is of course never.

Speaker 6 The MLV postseason is in full swing and with each and every pitch having a great amount of importance the pace of play slows down.

Speaker 6 Heading into Tuesday the total playoff game time has been 51 hours and 22 minutes or 184,860 seconds or an average of three hours 40 minutes per game. That's your PMT Sports Biz Minute, Mr.

Speaker 6 Cat and Mr. Commenter.

Speaker 1 Back to you. Thanks, Jake.
Very cool. Awesome.
Very cool. Jake.
Thank you very much.

Speaker 1 And then finally, before we get to guys on chicks, we got a take quake from a Penn State alum who wrote a letter. Angry letter writers are back.
This is from David Peter. Dave Peterson.

Speaker 1 He wrote to one of the players on Penn State, hey, Jonathan, my wife and I are proud older graduates of Penn State. He lists all the things that he likes, you know, like, oh, I love Penn State.

Speaker 1 First of all, right off the bat, I don't really trust anybody that gets married to somebody that they went to college with. He's, well, they're Penn State through and through.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 They're Penn State through and through.

Speaker 1 Though the athletes of today are certainly superior to those in my days, we miss the clean-cut young men and women from those days.

Speaker 1 Watching the Idaho game on TV, we couldn't help but notice your well, awful hair. Surely there must be mirrors in the locker room.
Don't you have parents or a girlfriend

Speaker 1 who've told you those shoulder-length dreadlocks look disgusting and certainly not attractive.

Speaker 1 We congratulate you on your game against Pitt, but you need to remember you represent all Penn Staters, both current and those alumni from years past.

Speaker 1 We would welcome the reappearance of dress codes for athletes.

Speaker 1 You will certainly be playing on Sunday in the future, but we have stopped watching the NFL due to the disgusting tattoos, awful hair, and immature antics in the end zone.

Speaker 1 Players should act as though they've been there before. I don't like the antics.
I got to back them up on the antics. Surprised they got quit the NFL.
Big problem with the antics.

Speaker 1 So they're saying

Speaker 1 they don't like excessive hair. This is actually perfect

Speaker 1 for

Speaker 1 Penn State football fans.

Speaker 1 We don't want anybody representing our program that has tattoos, body hair anywhere. We want just smooth, pristine.

Speaker 1 Stop. That's what Penn State football should be about.

Speaker 1 So this guy is...

Speaker 1 I looked into it a little more because at first I was like, this guy's not real. He is.
And he is

Speaker 1 a habitual letter writer. So he has written letters to local newspapers about his hatred of disgusting tattoos.

Speaker 1 He's written about why babies should be banned from restaurants and airplanes and why a page about Muslim holidays in a newspaper was offensive to 9-11 survivors.

Speaker 1 So I don't respect anything this guy believes in. I'm kind of with him on the babies and restaurants.
You should not be allowed to feed your child. Feed your child.
So I'm with him.

Speaker 1 I don't agree with anything he says, but I do kind of respect a guy who just sits at home and writes letters. This guy needs a hobby more than anything.
Yeah, he has it.

Speaker 1 Writing letters. His wife just needs to be like, don't you want to go play golf? No, he does.
I read more. He basically travels.
He has no kids. Surprise.
He and his wife travel and write letters.

Speaker 1 So he's the Marlins man of... of the mail.
Yes, of central Pennsylvania. Okay, got it.
That's a hell of a thing to live up to. Listen,

Speaker 1 if you are a letter writer, then write your letters and just write them, write them, write them, and just get your voice out there. I did notice that this letter was not handwritten, though.

Speaker 1 He signed his name at the bottom, so he typed it. This guy, I actually think it's a little bit of a cop-out on his part to not write them by hand.
Well,

Speaker 1 maybe I'm just an old school guy, but I liked it when our crackpots used to write letters to the editor in cursive. Imagine if this guy figures out Twitter.

Speaker 1 We need it. We need Dave Peterson on Twitter.
Someone get Dave Peterson a Twitter Twitter account. Get him on Twitter.

Speaker 1 At least just have someone go sit and just take his thoughts and put them on Twitter

Speaker 1 because he'd be electric.

Speaker 1 Too spicy for the internet. Once again, no long hair, tattoos.
What else was it? And antics. Antics.
This guy doesn't even like football. Yeah.
No.

Speaker 1 He likes football from like 1925. He likes staring at a picture of...

Speaker 1 A verbal meme. What's his name? Dave Peterson.
Dave Peterson is Wolverine laying in bed, and he's looking at a picture, and the picture frame is just Johnny Unitis yes clean cut yeah he's good man

Speaker 1 Dave Peterson what are you gonna do man just write some more letters he's it's he's basically creed even for the internet it's shocking his thoughts okay let's wrap up the show with little guys on chicks and our uncle chaps who

Speaker 1 Uncle Chaps with the good eyes uncle chaps with the good

Speaker 1 he's got two good eyes I have chocolate chocolate voice right now okay chocolate voice and banana eye. What did they do to your eye? Because you tried to play me the video of it today.

Speaker 1 No, I'm not interested in the eye. No, no, let's watch it.
But can you just explain what happened? Well,

Speaker 1 it's easier if I can

Speaker 1 show you. Just put it on one of the cameras.
Just show the camera. Gross eyes.
Just show you guys.

Speaker 1 The worst.

Speaker 7 So what happened is.

Speaker 1 He was following me around, holding it in front of my face earlier today.

Speaker 7 It's a medical procedure.

Speaker 1 Like back when we first found two girls, one cup. Now I wish I had a fucked up.
I didn't have to watch that. See.
Oh, God.

Speaker 1 All right. Let's do guys on shit.

Speaker 4 It's It's like a pimple popping video.

Speaker 1 No, it's worse. They took a razor and they just scraped the shit out of his eyes.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Stop.
You look healthy is what I'm trying to say.

Speaker 7 I look fucking good now.

Speaker 7 Whenever I look in the mirror, I don't discuss myself.

Speaker 1 Mostly. Mostly.
Mostly. You're thin?

Speaker 7 Thinner, yeah.

Speaker 1 Let's do guys on chicks. Okay.
And now that you have two good eyes, you can... You have no excuse for being a terrible reader.
You're chocolate voice, though.

Speaker 7 I do have a pretty bad chocolate voice. You You want to get into it right now?

Speaker 1 Yeah, I can hear it. It's like a frog.
It's gross. No, chaps, we want to drag this segment on even longer.
Take a sip. There you go.
Sip it. Okay.
Way to come prepared. Here we go.

Speaker 7 Sup, boys, especially handsome Hank. I started talking to this guy, and we made it out at halftime at the Jets opener.
Ever since then,

Speaker 7 the Jets have tanked. Now that Sam Darnold is back, we are going to go to the game, and I need to know, do we need to kiss again to break the curse?

Speaker 7 Or do I have to ghost him to avoid further damage to the Jets?

Speaker 1 That's how you get mono. So I would avoid kissing anybody at Jets games for the foreseeable future.
Unless it's Fireman Ed.

Speaker 1 This is also one of those things where I don't, you could fuck at the stadium and the Jets are going to suck. So you might as well just live your best life.

Speaker 7 I love public kissing, though.

Speaker 1 I know you do. I think that if you're in that stage and you're in a wonderful little fiery relationship.
You can hold hands.

Speaker 7 You just got to do it.

Speaker 1 You strike me as a guy that does the hand in your partner's back pocket.

Speaker 1 You finger a butt in public. I would if I'm was allowed.
Absolutely.

Speaker 1 I mean,

Speaker 1 just the like, you guys each are sharing a handful of ass.

Speaker 1 Well, no, you'd be wrong.

Speaker 7 I've always been pretty self-conscious about my butt cheeks. I'll go for the ladies' butt cheek, but I don't really like my butt cheeks touched just because.

Speaker 1 Because of the gas?

Speaker 7 Well, not because of the gas. No, Dan.

Speaker 1 Because it's too much. On account of the gas.

Speaker 7 Because I have kind of chicken legs, and I've always been self-conscious.

Speaker 1 That is squats over, bro. Yeah.

Speaker 7 Yeah, even those don't work for me.

Speaker 1 I did squat every day for a while. It didn't work.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 Ooh. Oh, okay.

Speaker 1 Hank learned the word foreshadowing. For

Speaker 1 domination. Oh,

Speaker 1 keep going. Chaps doesn't even know.
Oh, I have no idea. The narrator, the omniscient narrator doesn't even know.
Okay.

Speaker 7 I'm not a chick, but what happened to the Jake Award? It was an award for the most interceptions week to week found on a mysterious card for the summer.

Speaker 1 Yes. Good question.
Yeah. We looked into it.
We looked into it, and I think that it was created on a Bill Simmons podcast, and we didn't want to take anything from

Speaker 1 their show.

Speaker 1 But we are going to guess a lot of them. We're just too guess a lot.

Speaker 1 So

Speaker 1 we don't think that it came from a Bill Simmons show, but we think it was Simmons column.

Speaker 1 It was a column, I think.

Speaker 1 It had some

Speaker 1 that had some Simmons stink on it. I wish it was ours.
It wasn't ours. And as big J's ourselves, it's a genius thing.
So if Simmons came up with it, all credit to him.

Speaker 1 But we will not be taking anyone else's. Correct.
I wish you guys would.

Speaker 1 What would we do? LeBron Blames. Just take it.
it. Yeah, that's good.

Speaker 1 I don't know anything from your show.

Speaker 1 He could do like a Medal of Honor. Medal of Honor.
Medal of Honor is what I was going to say. Zero Block 30.
Everyone, listen. It's the best show out there.

Speaker 1 You could say that we're more of a pro-military podcast than he is. Don't you guys

Speaker 1 have the Aguilar guy, don't you?

Speaker 7 I feel like you know that was a little over.

Speaker 1 No, it wasn't. It's the best military podcast I've ever listened to.
Well, thank you. Except for the ones where we have Marlin's man on.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 Grunt of the week.

Speaker 7 That's good. Do you do that?

Speaker 1 No. Oh.

Speaker 1 Hey, PMT boys.

Speaker 7 Earlier this year, my boyfriend suggested we be Dog and Beth Chapman for Halloween. Yes.
I reluctantly said, sure.

Speaker 7 Literally five seconds later, after he found out Beth had passed, he said, oh, man, do you think it'll be frowned upon to still be them for Halloween?

Speaker 1 No, Halloween.

Speaker 7 I told him yes, but he insisted we wait and see until October. Here we are, and he is insisting enough time has passed where it could now be, quote, beautiful tribute to a beautiful couple.

Speaker 7 I say, absolutely not. Who's right? Would we be canceled if we were them? If so, any other costume ideas?

Speaker 1 No, just do angel wings.

Speaker 1 Death is the perfect time to bring us right. And also, put Beth Chapman with angel winks and maybe a little halo.
And then now it's not, ooh, we're making fun of a dead person.

Speaker 1 It's this dead person's in heaven. I can think of no better honor than to have somebody dress as me right after I died.
Yeah. Also, actually, very touching.

Speaker 1 As one of the biggest dog the bounty hunter fans out there, I have officially, I'm done grieving. So you can do it.
Yeah, which, so there are steps to grieving, right?

Speaker 1 It's denial, then it's bargaining, then it's dressing up as that person for Halloween. And letting Big Cat let you do it.

Speaker 7 If you don't do it this year, you can't ever do it.

Speaker 1 Correct. This is the.
Yeah, you have to do it because otherwise it just becomes, oh, that's lame. Like when Steve Irwin died.
Also, if you.

Speaker 1 It was in great taste to dress up as Steve Irwin in a khaki vest with a stingray hanging out of of your chest. That was funny the first year.
Now it's just weird.

Speaker 1 Yeah, and if you don't find one of your single friends to be like a tweaker that you can chase around all Halloween, then you're not doing it correctly. You need a Leland.
Yeah. You do need a Leland.

Speaker 1 And yeah, you need a Leland, and Leland's gained a lot of weight. Uh-uh.

Speaker 1 We do not weight shame. Well, it's just years.
Now that you've lost weight, you've changed. No, I'm just saying.
I watched it. I was like, that's Leland? Holy shit.

Speaker 1 So Leland is prominent is what we're saying. He's a prominent boy.

Speaker 7 What's up, boys? Especially Jawline Cat. My boyfriend has a picture of Carson Wentz as his background since the start of the 2017-18 season.

Speaker 7 When I asked him if he would switch his background to a photo of us, he said, quote, I'll make you my background when you help the Eagles win a Super Bowl. How should I address this? Thanks.

Speaker 1 Carson Wentz didn't even help him. He didn't even win it.

Speaker 7 It was Nick Foles.

Speaker 1 He didn't say shit. It was actually the Patriots choking away.
Speaking of which. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Trade Nick Foles?

Speaker 1 Absolutely. Ooh, you're all in on Gardner.

Speaker 7 I would trade him for a six-round conditional pick.

Speaker 1 Okay. Now, we might be able to make something happen here because, Big Cat, I think your team might be interested in Nick Foles.
No, we got Mitch.

Speaker 7 So I think we should trade Nick Foles to like the Steelers.

Speaker 1 Ooh. They got Duck, though, who's in AWL.
Mm-hmm.

Speaker 1 Oh. Yeah.
He'll be

Speaker 1 Duck's backup. Devlin, yeah.

Speaker 1 Devlin Hodges is a true alpha.

Speaker 1 They can't trade Carson. Solely because he listens to

Speaker 1 Duck. Right.

Speaker 1 And shingle him. That would be

Speaker 1 like the the wizard's locker room all over again. So you're all in on Gardner Minshew.
Why would I not be? He's amazing. Okay.

Speaker 1 I think Chaps is right because as a six-round pick, he's not getting paid. Right.
So boom, just load up. Yeah, because next year.
Wait, that's the point I made on Monday.

Speaker 1 You can hit free agency like a fucking Connor Bricks. Well, he's not allowed to pay for it.
That's literally made the point I made on Monday.

Speaker 7 He's not allowed to get paid until at least three more seasons.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I made this whole point.

Speaker 1 Go all in. Yeah.
I agree with Chaps.

Speaker 1 Thank you, 50. They had a whole thing about this on Monday.
Oh. 50 wasn't listening.
Good point, chaps.

Speaker 7 I wasn't either.

Speaker 1 I'm too shea.

Speaker 7 Sup, drunk guy, big cat and Hank. What gum flavor do you think Pete Carroll chews on game day?

Speaker 7 His gum chewing has gotten outrageous.

Speaker 1 No, it cannot be outrageous.

Speaker 7 How do you even, I don't even know how you think when you chew gum that way.

Speaker 1 Well,

Speaker 1 that's kind of the point.

Speaker 1 So you're not overthinking things if you got a jaw working. Do you think he's just got? John's like, let me spit out my gum real quick.
I got to tie my shoes. I mean, that's true.

Speaker 1 If you're like that, no one even wants to have a conversation with you.

Speaker 7 Why would the refs speak to you? I don't take you seriously. You're too...

Speaker 1 No one wants that. That's a good point with the refs.
No, I think the refs are okay with it because they get kind of a baseline of Pete Carroll.

Speaker 1 I think his jaw moves at the same rate as his heartbeats. So it's like, that's his

Speaker 1 constant EKG man.

Speaker 7 He's like one ten a minute.

Speaker 1 He's real pissed. Exactly.
Yeah. To answer.
He gets excited. He just.

Speaker 1 To answer this person's question, it can't be one of the delicious gums that only has flavor for 15 seconds, like juicy fruit

Speaker 1 or zebra gum.

Speaker 1 No,

Speaker 1 it's probably like your regular trident or something that you can chew forever.

Speaker 7 He's got to be popping new gummies all the time.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 7 So it's probably like fruit stripes.

Speaker 1 Yeah, but fruit stripes. Literally, it's like 10 seconds and it's gone.

Speaker 7 That 10 seconds is the best thing.

Speaker 1 I think it's hard, though. I think he's got bubble tape.
So he's got like a shitload of it. Either that or Big League Chew, man.
Bubblicious wouldn't be a bad one.

Speaker 1 That has some very good lasting.

Speaker 1 Great Big League Chew will get you going. Now, Bazooka Joe, you can chip a tooth on that.
Yes. But you get the hilarious cartoon in there, which is great.

Speaker 7 Hello, gentlemen, and itty bitty PFT. Love you guys.

Speaker 7 I've been texting and sexting back and forth with this guy for a while, and he finally came over the other night. But that's all he did.
He just came over and wanted to sleep.

Speaker 7 I kicked him out because why would I share with my bed with someone for no reason? I'm just curious if I should take this personally, or do you think this guy's just choked?

Speaker 1 Ooh, he choked. Yeah, you catfished him.
Yeah. The C-word's tough.
I don't know. Maybe he just knew his limitations and he was like, you know what? I'm not up for a performance tonight.

Speaker 1 You asked me to come over and sleep with you. I'm going to go by the letter of the law.
Also, isn't that true love?

Speaker 1 Just sleeping together and never having sex?

Speaker 1 Kind of. Yeah.

Speaker 1 You're just fast-forwarding to the true love part of your relationship.

Speaker 1 It's not physical. You might be a sapiosexual.
Have you guys heard about sapiosexuals? Nope. Where you just are attracted to somebody's brain.
Oh, you just love their brain.

Speaker 1 You love to watch them think.

Speaker 1 That's how I am. Yeah.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 You like getting brain? Fuck yeah. Yeah.

Speaker 1 So, boys, I'm a single mom. Might just be homeless, too.
That too. That would be a great grift to be just a devastatingly attractive homeless guy.
I feel like

Speaker 1 it would have gone viral by now if there was a hot viral.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Well, he doesn't tell them that he's homeless.

Speaker 1 No, but I'm saying if there was a devastatingly attractive homeless person, there already would have been a picture being like, check out this homeless guy. He's so hot and buzzy.

Speaker 1 He'd be like, 17 times you thirst-trapped at a homeless person. And then that homeless person gets like a shitload of money donated to him, and then it turns out that they're racist.

Speaker 1 Yeah, they were a Nazi. That's why they're homeless.
They got fired because they were like wildly racist at their old job.

Speaker 7 I saw my first train shitter today.

Speaker 1 Oh,

Speaker 7 when I was on my way from Newark here to the office.

Speaker 1 She's wearing a pink shirt and a white hat. She.

Speaker 1 She.

Speaker 1 Wow. She was hot.

Speaker 7 Sweatpants. And who's the character that kind of has some mental issues on or is a new black?

Speaker 1 I don't know. I don't watch that that, you know.
Jason Biggs.

Speaker 7 Yeah, Jason Biggs. She looked like Jason Biggs.
She sat there, and there was like four other people around, like, watching her eye contact.

Speaker 7 When you watch your dog, yeah, she shut her eyes and like put her butt cheeks up against one of the chairs and was like trying to get her.

Speaker 1 Next one. I know what shitting looks like.
Next one. You ever seen a trained masturbator? You're not a real New Yorker.

Speaker 7 Sup, boys. I'm a single mom.
I own my own house, have a great job, and a good relationship with my son's father.

Speaker 7 I recently been on Hinge and Bubble, and I'm always upfront about the fact that I'm a mom. For the most part, the conversation ends right there.

Speaker 7 Is this because they think I need them to take care of us and my son? Or does he need a new daddy? Is that what it is? Thanks.

Speaker 1 Love you guys. I actually think a lot of guys are afraid to sleep with a single mom because to them, that means that they've reached maturity.
Right?

Speaker 1 If you're just, it doesn't matter if the girl's younger than you. It tells a guy you're a grown-up once you start sleeping with somebody that's already had a kid.

Speaker 1 Also, maybe make like a highlight reel of your kid being cool and then put that in your hinge. No, that would be even more intimidating.

Speaker 1 No, but it's like, hey, he's not one of those kids that's going to

Speaker 1 ask

Speaker 1 for you to be a dad. He's just going to grab you a beer and maybe have a catch every now and then.
Yeah, he's not going to interrupt us when we're making love. Right.

Speaker 1 Here's his cage that we can take a picture of your kid in a high cage. It's a mixtape.

Speaker 1 You need a...

Speaker 7 video of how the kid goes to sleep at night if the kid's like three years old like if you tell them all right it's time to go to bed and and it's 45 seconds yeah it's like four and it's like 45 seconds long because i think then you'll get in relationship like you'll be comfortable but if it's like a two-hour process nobody wants that right right

Speaker 1 also i mean if you're a mom then you so that actually should be a big green light for the guy oh no this next one is heavy hey guys my boyfriend has aids but he hasn't told me

Speaker 7 but he hasn't told me yet yeah how did you the only reason i know is because he also when he was drunk but doesn't remember that he told me do i bring it up or wait for him to tell me?

Speaker 7 It's fucking AIDS.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Yeah.
Isn't that, is that like a crime

Speaker 1 to have sex with somebody if you know that you have AIDS? I also feel like maybe he was joking. Is that a joke, though? Just goofy.

Speaker 1 Depending on your level of dark humor. It's a little casual AIDS.
Yeah, did you tell you actually AIDS? Did you hear about the guy?

Speaker 1 He went to his doctor and the doctor was like, I got bad news and worse news. Which one do you want first? He goes, give me the worst news.
And the doctor goes, you have AIDS.

Speaker 1 He's like, well, shit, that that sucks. What's the bad news? Doctor says, you have Alzheimer's.
And the guy goes, well, at least I don't have AIDS.

Speaker 1 Nice. Nice.

Speaker 1 Nice.

Speaker 1 That's a little like. The gallows humor.
No,

Speaker 1 that was like the fifth hole of a golf outing. Yeah, once you had a couple beers, the first guy in your group's pissed out to the bottom of the body.
Throw it out of there.

Speaker 1 Yeah, Bob from accounting loves that joke.

Speaker 7 Sup, boys. My boyfriend made me three.

Speaker 1 Oh, no.

Speaker 7 Sup, boys, my boyfriend made three separate comments to me about how my ass has gotten smaller this weekend. So I'm back hitting the weights for Squatober.
There we go.

Speaker 7 But my boyfriend never compliments me anyway. So it's even worse getting my ass back.

Speaker 1 No, I think Squatsober is a personal challenge. Yeah, what you got to do is get your ass back and then dump them and then get a hotter boyfriend.

Speaker 7 Who doesn't compliment a nice ass, though?

Speaker 1 Well, she's...

Speaker 1 Well, she lost it. Yeah.

Speaker 7 But still, you still, even if you don't mean it, you still throw, like, you see a naked butt cheek out there.

Speaker 1 You're like, I listen to your podcast. Yeah.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 Well, the nice thing, here's what you need to do. So it's like when you lose weight, you have to get a new ensemble.
You got to get a new wardrobe to match your body. Just get new jeans.

Speaker 1 They make jeans that will highlight your new ass jeans, yeah. Also, it's been a week since Squattober started, so maybe the gains aren't as noticeable as you might think they are.
Squat in his face.

Speaker 1 On his face. Sit on his face.
Yeah, there we go. You have no choice but

Speaker 1 Fuck yeah.

Speaker 7 I recently found out I might have chlamydia from a guy hooked up with a while back.

Speaker 7 I'm currently in a relationship with my boyfriend.

Speaker 1 Do I tell him and risk losing him or just keep it to myself?

Speaker 7 I don't think chlamydia is something that you keep for yourself.

Speaker 1 Yeah, this is the AIDS. Similar to the AIDS conversation.

Speaker 1 I think you gotta say it. If it keeps on giving, I think that chlamydia is really easy to treat, too.

Speaker 7 Isn't that one that's curable, right?

Speaker 1 Yeah, that's something you'll have to laugh about. Well, they're all curable at this point.
Yeah, I don't think you have to.

Speaker 1 I think if you have chlamydia and you go get treated for it and it's cured, you could deny it deny yeah yeah yeah yeah if it's in because it's a hip violation if somebody says that's not true true good point adam shefter yeah also is he gonna be pissed off that you had sex with somebody before you were dating

Speaker 1 i don't think so i don't think so so you can just be like hey i got it from somebody else yeah unless you're like who's holding his life from well it could be any one of these 78 guys yeah or like it's his main rival

Speaker 1 yeah then he has to kill him

Speaker 1 yeah why does my boyfriend always spit in the toilet before he pees he says every guy does it, but he can't possibly be sure about it. It's testing the water.

Speaker 1 I don't piss before, or spit before I piss. You spit on your piss? No, I don't like to pitch on your dick.

Speaker 7 I don't like to spit. I probably haven't legitimately spit

Speaker 7 since I stopped smoking.

Speaker 1 So like nine years. Whoa.
Wow. Not even a little spit?

Speaker 7 Unless I got like an allergy infection. Like if I got like just a little touch of bronchitis.

Speaker 1 Give me a little spit. Spit.
Let me go spit. Let's pop that cherry.

Speaker 1 I don't spit.

Speaker 1 Come on. Spit, dude.
I don't want to spit. What's wrong with you? You guys are going to front.
I'll do it first. Okay.

Speaker 1 Spit. I don't have enough spit.
Spit on my spit. Spit.
Spit on my spit. Give that chocolate to it.
Oh, that sounds disgusting. You almost got it on your floor.

Speaker 1 You don't know how to spit. I don't.
No. I told you.
It's been a long time. He's not a good looking.

Speaker 7 It's not like riding a bike.

Speaker 1 Yeah, you got to be in spitting shape.

Speaker 1 I love watching baseball when it's late at night in the late innings of a game when they just cut from shot to a player until he spits to a shot of another player until that guy spits.

Speaker 1 At some point, baseball just becomes guys spitting on a field. Right, and there's good spitters that you just know, like he's going to have a bunch of sunflower spits.

Speaker 7 He's the best spitter you've ever seen.

Speaker 1 Terry Francona.

Speaker 4 Bodhi from the wire.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 John Smalton.

Speaker 7 John Smallton's pretty good.

Speaker 1 Lupino is a pretty good spitter. Sean Taylor.

Speaker 1 He spat with

Speaker 1 purpose. Chipper Jones is a really good spitter.
Yeah, Chipper Jones was a good spitter. Diego Maradona spat on the camera one time, then they tested it, and it came back positive for cocaine.

Speaker 1 That's how they caught him. Really?

Speaker 1 Who told us that story? I forget. I'm just to the point where it's all my life is a blur.
Was that a fake story? Someone told us what? Frank?

Speaker 1 French Fontana told us on the podcast. That's right.
I got secondhand shot. Frank told the story of French Fontana.

Speaker 1 I was like, wait, I've heard that story. Wait, we heard that together.
Is that it? That's it. Chat.
That's it. All right.
It's been wonderful. Don't rub any more bananas,

Speaker 1 okay? Bad spit. Look great.
Eyes look great. Podcast is doing great.
Zero Blog30. Download it.
Where are you going to be this weekend?

Speaker 7 I'm going to be in Dallas for the natty tour. We're going to go to the Texas State Fair, hang out with Big Tex.

Speaker 1 Who are you going with?

Speaker 7 Kate and Pat.

Speaker 1 Fuck yeah.

Speaker 1 Eat the deep-fried butter while you're there. Don't eat the Kool-Aid pickle.

Speaker 7 One thing that I'm looking forward to is the deep-fried peanut butter and jelly.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Okay.
Do it. It's cheat day, Saturday.
Yeah. So you got it.
I got it. Eat whatever you want.
All right. Okay.
Thanks, chaps. Dude, you should do the hands-free banana cream pie eating contest.

Speaker 1 And okay. But make sure you don't get it on your head.
Wear goggles. Face.

Speaker 1 Yeah, the BOS.

Speaker 1 Yeah, okay. Got it.

Speaker 5 Love you guys.

Speaker 5 Talking away.

Speaker 5 I know what I can see and say the egg

Speaker 5 Today's a marketing funny shy it away

Speaker 5 Oh, I'll be coming for your love of king

Speaker 5 Shy it away

Speaker 5 Oh, I'll be coming for your love of you

Speaker 5 I

Speaker 5 will

Speaker 5 say

Speaker 5 let's just say

Speaker 5 I'm all set in spouse

Speaker 5 a little bit

Speaker 5 Tell the love of what is up

Speaker 5 Say after me

Speaker 1 It's no better to be safe and sorry

Speaker 1 Say after me

Speaker 1 It's no better to be safe and sorry.

Speaker 1 Come on

Speaker 1 me.

Speaker 1 Take

Speaker 1 me

Speaker 1 up.

Speaker 1 I'll keep

Speaker 1 going.

Speaker 1 You're a tremendous.