Coach Mike Leach and Dana Holgorsen + Week 2 Picks and Preview

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On today's Pardon My Take, we have Coach Dana Holgerson, Coach Mike Leach in preparation for the big Friday night Cougar on Cougar action.

We're excited to talk to both those guys.

We have a NFL Week two preview and picks.

Our picks stink.

But Larry's picks stink.

Oh, well, our picks stink as a team.

Yes.

Don't.

You're part of that, Hank.

What'd you go?

Three and one.

He went three and one because he didn't even know the lines or anything.

He just guessed.

He's basically our goldfish.

Yeah.

So we're going to do Larry's picks as well during the ads. Don't hate on larry has uh his picks you can also buy the larry shirts still in stock we have those two coaches on we have fantasy fuck boys fire fest faq a packed friday show to get you ready for the football weekend before we do that ever had one of those days when it's just too cold to keep working nah neither has ariot a Ariat work jackets and boots are packed with all the

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whatever in Ariat work gear. Okay, we're gonna rock down to Electric Avenue.
It's Pardon My Take presented by Barstool Sports. Welcome to part of my take presented by bar stool sports welcome to pardon my take presented by the cash app go download the cash app right now put in promo code barstool you get five dollars off five dollars to aspca today is friday september 13th oh it's friday the 13th Yikes.
Cam Newton is broken. It looked tough out there.
He's broken.

He had bad body language the whole time he looked like he was pissed off i don't know what it was but when you get in a fourth and one situation and you don't just hand the ball to cam newton say hey just go fall forward forward the thing where you just jump up in the air and stick the ball out. They got cute.
They got cute.

And in a serious note, Cam Newton just doesn't look right. No.

Every receiver, he either missed the throw or put it where they shouldn't be thrown.

He would just simple passes.

They were not thrown in the right position.

And the whole night, it felt like the Panthers should have won that game.

They didn't win that game because Cam Newton is broken.

Jealous.

And jealous.

So, Hank.

Yeah, give it to us, Hank.

Thank you. And the whole night, it felt like the Panthers should have won that game.
They didn't win that game because Cam Newton is broken. And jealous.
And jealous. So, yeah, give it to us, Hank.
Cam Newton was talking to the press, and he was talking about North Turner, not Rivera. But he said, I think Coach is C-Mac up for fantasy this week.
He picked up C-Mac for fantasy. I should have went over and seen who he was drafting in this league.
That's probably why we aren't doing deep passes. He should pick me for his quarterback.
So that's like a sub like a haha yeah yeah actually what the fuck and then cam and then christian mccaffrey goes from 200 all-purpose yards to 50 all-purpose yards and cam newton tries to throw the ball deep and he can't do cam newton actually looks injured like seriously yeah i don't think soul too yeah his soul he was doing the thing where in the huddle he would take like an extra second after he broke the huddle on his knee and just take a sigh.

Maybe Cam Newton has mono too.

It's like when you wake up in the morning and you have a big day and you're just like, here we go.

That's Cam Newton.

His soul is injured.

His body's injured.

His soul is injured.

He is not right.

I am done thinking.

Like that's one of those teams where it screws with your brain

if a team goes to the Super Bowl and then for the next five years

Thank you. is not right i am done uh thinking like that's one of those teams where it screws with your brain if a team goes to the super bowl and then for the next five years when nothing drastic changes you're like well nope there's still that super bowl team but they're just not and cam newton is not like last year they looked good at the start of the season he gets injured they i think they've lost eight straight cam newton starts i think it's seven no but tonight was eight tonight was eight Tonight was eight.
Yeah, they don't look good at all. Verbal meme, you ready for this one? Yikes.
Cam Newton is one arm, and then Jameis Winston is the other, and they're slapping hands in the middle. And then in the middle it says not being good at throwing footballs and also stealing things in college at Florida.
But I will give credit to Jameis Winston. He actually played well tonight.
Not great, but he didn't turn the ball. The very best thing that Jameis Winston did tonight was get sacked a couple times.
Yeah. He's getting good at knowing when to just get hit.
He is also, Jameis Winston, is the number one in the entire NFL, the number one faller. When he falls, he looks like the guy in the infomercial who just like dumping all the stuff all over his car and has a handful of Cheerios and it just whoops that's him every single time he gets pushed even a little bit I think his his limbs just start flailing everywhere I think we're saying that he is the most slapstick quarterback yes I saw him and then Eli yes or like one and one a yeah in terms of like how hilarious they are to get hit yeah but so so i will give credit to james winston for not turning over the ball because it did feel like all night that we're just waiting for that james winston interception didn't happen cam newton just didn't have it and i don't know when he'll ever have it again like that's a he's now how old is cam newton 33 34 i don't know he's younger he's like give me a, give me an age.
Cam Newton's like 29, I think. They don't make old quarter, they don't make running quarterbacks, 30.
They don't make old running quarterbacks for a reason. Yeah, so in a situation like that, every other year, I feel like they just give the ball to Cam and say, run forward.
Run directly forward, Cam. And this time they did the fake Philly special, and the timing was all off on it.
Cam got up to the line and just kind of hung out next to the tackle for a while. It was a slow developing play and credit to Bruce Arians for making a big mistake and calling two timeouts in a row.
That actually gave them a look at what the offense was doing. Right, I think it actually was not a mistake.
I think he was in a bad set and he's like, you know what, we'll just give up a yard here and hopefully get in the right defense. Because, yeah, I mean, it was.

Oh, I knew what I wanted to say as well.

The other thing that happened tonight, because it wasn't a great aesthetic football game.

But next Thursday.

Hold on.

Titans.

Titans. Yeah.

Fuck you.

Everyone who says Thursday night football sucks.

Fuck you. It's football.
It happens every single year. They're like, this is Thursday night football.
This is atrocious. You really want to watch this? Yes, I do.
I want to watch it every Thursday. If there was not Thursday night football, I'd have nothing to look forward to on Thursday.
This is Thursday night football. I don't care if it's bad.
I really don't. I just want to watch football.
And you assholes who are just looking for retweets talking about how bad it is, fuck you. Right.
That's my rant. It's like being stranded in the desert and you're so thirsty.
You haven't had water in three days. And guess what? Someone hands you a Diet Mountain Dew.
You're like, ugh. It's going to taste awesome.
Diet? I'm going to drink the fuck out. I might beer bong it.
I might butt funnel that Diet Mountain Dew. Yeah, they're like, oh, you didn't have any Sprite?

Yeah, exactly.

Shut up.

I agree.

Thursday night football is good, will always be good,

especially next week when it's Jags-Titans color rush.

Even when it's bad, it's good.

All right, so the other big...

Also, shout out Michael Irvin's suit.

Yes, which is...

We're looking at it right now.

And Joe Thomas for not only getting skinny,

but shaving his head,

and he looks like a completely different person. Yeah, he does.
He looks like Trent Dilfer after a weekend doing CrossFit. Bucs fans that are sitting in the stands right now because we're watching the postgame, that's got to be the weirdest collection of fans, the diehard Bucs fans who travel to a road game and then stay afterwards.
I just saw a guy look like a pirate. What did you say? Cheyhov.
Cheyhov, yeah. But it is.
I mean, if you had to rank all, I mean, I guess Raiders fans, but we already know what they are. Like the 10 Bucs fans that are still in the Panthers stadium right now, I would like to pick their brains.
Well, they're just waiting like hope against hope for the Bucs to come back out of the tunnel to give them a high five for being there. Right.
That's something that the NFL could learn from pro soccer is doing the hands over the head applause to the fans when they walk off the field. That's always a nice little touch.
Oh my God, look at that suit. NFL fans are just, they're such creatures.
I love them because I mean, I am one myself and I can say that, but man, there's just something about them. Like the diehard, diehard, diehards that travel and then stay and then go to the draft football family man look at these look at these guys is terrible radio but this guy they all they're all dressed like it's halloween and they got pirate outfits on all right other big story we had sam donald has mono probably the most embarrassing thing that could happen to your starting quarterback that's about to make his big second year leap and the jets were about to win uh super bowl and they were going to be good this year.
And then mono takes you down. So Adam Gase showed up at his apartment, knocked on the door like it's love actually with a bunch of signs.
To me, you have mono. Yeah.
And let him know face to face. I guess that was like a real classic thing for him to do.
But at the end of the day, Sam Darnold is going to miss like six to eight weeks because he's tired adam gase got the news before darnold yeah is that a is that a hippo violation how does that work adam shefter knew before anybody yeah because adam shefter probably made out with him yeah he was kissing yeah gave him the mono uh spin zone for the for the jets first one trevor simeon not terrible northwestern guide greeny should be over the moon about what he's not terrible Trevor Simeon. Not terrible.
Northwestern guy. Greeny should be over the moon about this.
What? He's not terrible. Trevor Simeon.
Trevor Simeon is not good, but he's also not terrible. Right? He's not a huge, huge downgrade over Sam Darnold.
Of what Sam Darnold currently is. Yeah.
Number two spin zone. As far as we know, the Jets quarterback was kissing girls of age, which is an upgrade from former Jet quarterbacks.
Big time. Yeah.
So, boom. That's a nice spin zone.
Yeah, I love that. Good job, Sam.
You're a real man's man. I like that.
Every quarterback, if I'm drafting them, I want to know if they've had mono before. Because when you get to the NFL in the National Football League, you make out with chicks.
And I want a quarterback that's got the mono in his system already, so he's immune to it. Yeah, I just wonder, the biggest question is not the fact that, oh, how did you get mono? It's when did you get mono? Did you get it after the loss to the Bills? Because if you went out and partied and like, hey, I'm going to just go suck on some face.
We need to do some backwards math here and figure out how long does mono stay dormant before you start having symptoms of someone told me it was like lyme disease you have forever no but when you first get it yeah well it's in your system forever forever so maybe he's had it maybe no but it just pops up well that's what we need to figure out what's the incubation period like on mononucleosis bless you use me that was a big time can i can i give you another spin zone i I have a mono. You might have mono, but you don't make out with checks.
No, I don't. Okay, so here's the thing.
Jets missing their quarterback. The coach of the Jets, Adam Gase.
Yeah. You knew who else is available that used to play for Adam Gase? Jay Cutler.
Jay Cutler, who's basically played with mono his entire career. His personality.
Way to make fun of diabetes, bro. No, I'm saying his personality is mono.
He's got diabetes. He has bad insulin.
Maybe it's just mono. Blood sugar.
I don't know which one it is. Is that the diabetes of the soul? I'm just saying.
You just made fun of a diabetic. No.
Well, yes, I did, but I didn't make fun of the mono part. Yeah, I would love to see Jay Cutler.
I'm always in for J.C. Why not? Let him get out there and sling it around a little bit.
I've also heard that Sam Darnold got mono maybe from Juul, from Juuling too much. Oh, I thought you meant the singer.
No, because he passed. Well, yeah, she probably has.
She definitely has mono. Yes.
If you live in your van at any point, that's a symptom right there that you currently have mono. Yeah.
I looked up some of the symptoms. It sounds pretty sweet, honestly.
Mono?

Yeah, you just hang out.

You're just tired.

You're just tired all the time.

You're just tired and yawning.

I've had mono for 34 years.

It's basically Hank shows symptoms of mono.

Yeah, that's true.

When you yawn.

That's a mono yawn.

Uh-huh.

It is.

Sorry, I'm just so chill.

Such a chill bro.

Yeah, so I don't know where the Jets go from here,

but I do know this.

I'm going to take the Jets on Monday night. Are you really? Yeah.
Dude, this is a classic situation. Classic monogram.
Where everyone freaks out, and everyone's like, oh, Sam Darnold's out. The Jets stink now, and it's six and a half points.
And Trevor Simeons, he might not win the game, but he'll be good enough to keep him around. Okay, so six and a half is too much, but this is a Brown statement game.
It's a lose relief town we're gonna get to all the games but yeah i i will probably take the jets because i just think it's like the like you even said sam darnold like what he's playing the level he's playing at right now not talking about his ceiling is it that far off than trevor simian if trevor simian plays his best game it's not it's the same as samold. Good Trevor Simeon is better than bad Sam Darnold.
Right, it's mono Sam Darnold. Yeah, right.
Okay. Yeah, I guess you just talked me into the Jets.
Yeah. Okay, let's do some picks in the weekend preview.
We, as a team, did not do well. I was 1-3.
You were 1-3. I think you were 0-4.
I was 0-4? You were 0-4. I don't know about that.
But that's okay.

I'm not actually...

You know what?

We were 0-4 on the 7.

We were 0-4 on this side of the table.

We were 1-3 on that side.

Hank, I don't know what Hank did.

Hank didn't even know the lines.

He wasn't prepared for the segment.

He got lucky.

Are you like a fucking teacher that's like,

oh, you didn't come in prepared.

That's minus five points.

You didn't do the reading, Hank.

He didn't do the reading.

Still got an A on the test.

Okay.

So we're going to do our picks.

We're going to do a little weekend preview. Should we throw out a couple Loser Leaves Town games? We could do something.
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See AHS.com slash contracts for coverage details, limitations, and exclusions. Okay, so we're going to do our picks.
Let's do a weekend preview. I'll throw out a couple of Loser Leaf Town games for you, PFT.
You tell me if that's crazy. How about the Bears and Broncos? Oh, you're ready to hang the Dunshane pretty soon, my friend.
I have been threatening the Vic Fangio. I have been threatening all week that I will melt down if the Bears lose to the shitty Broncos and the even shittier Joe Flacco.
Uh-huh. If the Bears lose on Sunday.
Is this a mayor's bed situation? No, it's a meltdown. Do you need me to tell you how the NFL works again? I'm promising a meltdown.
So when I say that, I mean, we're going to probably be on a live stream because our lives are taped. I will stomp my feet.
I will say mean things to people around me that I will later on regret, but also there'll be a little truth in it, whatever. So why is this different from any other stuff? Right, exactly.
But it's going to be a full blown meltdown. Usually I hold back a little.
I might even cry a little. I'm going to say, I'm going to yell at people.
I'm going to tweet at people really mad. The Bears cannot lose this game.
You're going to be very triggered if they do. So triggered.
Shut up Hank. I'm already triggered.
Look at his face. Okay yeah he's got a little smug going over there.
He's got a fucking face. The difference between a meltdown and a riot is what? Like when we say if this doesn't happen, then we riot.
Is it just like a low-T riot? It's an emotional, personal riot. I feel like it's a riot where you pull your hood over your face.
Yeah, no, it's a riot with my own emotions. And bad posture.
That's what a meltdown is, just like sinking into your chair backwards. Yep, yep.
Okay. Yeah, I can get into that, but here's why you have reason to be worried.
It's tough to win on the road in Denver. Yeah, we all know the stats.
It's like 22-1 or something ridiculous, but none of those games were played by Joe Flacco, who sucks. So I'm not worried.
Do we do a mayor's bet on it? I'm not worried. You now have the Broncos team? No, just Joe Flacco.
How many teams you were for? I didn't like your disrespect to Flacco. Well, it's deserved.
The other loser leaves town game that I had thrown out there. Well, actually, we already talked about the Bucs and the Panthers.
That was a loser leaves town game. So Bucs suck, huh? They lost earlier tonight.
Jets-Browns will be the other loser leaves town game, but we'll talk about that on Sunday. But that is definitely a loser leaves town game.
That's a Dunchain game that might be yeah i think we can probably put the dunchain on the jets already but yes if the browns if the browns lose that game there are going to be some issues in the front office i i wouldn't i wouldn't put it past john dorsey to fire somebody if they lose that game i love this uh sunday slate because it's the perfect amount of like decent there's a few decent 1 o'clock games that will get you juiced up, some late finishes and then it rolls right into a really good Rams-Saints game rolling into a really good Eagles-Falcons game. So it's like the perfect setup for a Sunday.
Because you don't want to have your premier games at 1 o'clock. No, I don't want to blow my lid too early.
You want to get it going, really feel good about it, and then get into it. So let's do some picks.
Here's another one, though. Yeah.
You ready for this? San Francisco or Cincinnati? You think that's a loser leaves town? I think it's a loser leaves town game. Niners were lucky.
They're not even allowed in the town in the first place. They're not really.
In what town? You're like Mercury Morris saying, don't call me when you're in my town, call me when you're on my block yeah yeah like the the town is the playoffs like they have no chance anyway okay town's actually a great

movie starring rear admiral all right so let's do some picks let's start with favorites clip your

nuts hank go with your favorite i put this your favorite favorite just like your daddy uh taking

the patriots you have to take the patriots i do you i can't do you it's just like principle wise

i know it's a crazy line it's outrageous but it's one of those things where there's going to be no better thrill than rooting for the Patriots to cover 18 and a half. I'll give you a better thrill already off the bat.
It's going to spoil one of my picks. I like the Dolphins.
Oh, my gosh. And it's one of these things.
You're so stupid. You're clearly biased.
Let me explain something to you about football. I can unbiasedly tell you that the Patriots are going to cover 18 and a half with ease.
Hank, I'm giving you fuel for do your pod right now. Nobody believes in the Patriots.
I've got 18 and a half, the line that I'm looking at right now. But it's like one of these things where the universe is taunting me, saying you won't take the shitty Dolphins, possibly the worst team in the last five years of the NFL.
You know what? This is a group that's telling you something about football. Everyone's talking about how bad they are, how everybody wants off the team.
Oh, yeah, because they're bad. They got a guy named Ryan Fitzpatrick.
This is win one out of seven. I'm going to count wins against the spread as wins for the Dolphins.
It's rare that you have a team in the NFL openly tanking this early in the season. I can't even think of like most teams, they at least pretend that they're going to try to compete or pretend they're going to try to play.
This team has already given up. And 18's a lot.
Here's a little nugget for you, Hank, and for all the betters out there. In the Patriot games, when they are favored by 10 or more, it might be 14 or more, but whatever, both apply.
Second half unders are 10-0 in their last 10. And I think that actually applies even more with Belichick probably not trying to show up Brian Flores.
So take the second half under. Right.
I think they're going to cover in the first half and then just take the foot off the gas. Exactly.
That's what I'm hoping for. They cover in the first half and they take the foot off the gas.
Got it. Okay.
I just need an inside 18. Give me your favorite.
Like plenty of extra. Give me your favorite.
My favorite, I'm going to go with the Bills, minus one and a half on the road. Okay.
So a little road dog for you. I like the Bills.
I hate the Giants. I hate Pat Shermer.
I hate Eli Manning's stupid face in this game. Damn.
It's the end of short season. Just give us a pick, man.
It's the end of short season. So this is where Josh Allen needs to really get it in.
I like this pick. I like this pick as well.
All right. I'll give you the game that Hank can't even be paid to watch.
I like the Bengals. Minus two.
I think the 49ers, a little bit of a fraudulent win week one. Their defense played well, but Jimmy Garoppolo did not.
I don't know who their wide receiver like they don't have anyone to throw to

Debo Samuel who's a dude

but didn't complete a pass over nine yards

George Kittle yeah I know yeah Jimmy Garoppolo

I think his average pass was 5.5 yards

I think the Bengals you saw

it they actually run

2019 offense now they ran

like significantly more plays

than they have the last couple years so

I think the Bengals are going to cover

at home okay minus two I don't mind that

at all I think Zach Taylor it are going to cover at home. Minus two.
I don't mind that at all. I think Zach Taylor, it's one of these first-year coach type things.
There's not enough tape out there on him. Yes.
So he hasn't called enough plays. There's not enough to look at and to study for the tendencies.
Also, Brian Flores, first-year coach, not enough tape on him. And Andy Dalton, the last two years, I think the Bengals were second to last.
Bill Belichick knows his entire brain. Second to last and last in pace, in terms of offensive pace and plays per game.
They had 70 plays against Seattle. Andy Dalton, key to Andy Dalton, don't let him think.
Just let him play. There you go.
Just let him play. Just be like, Andy, throw to this guy.
Yes, don't take too much time. Just play, play, play.
I like that. Hank, do you think that Bill Belichick has every single coach's DNA on file? Yes.
The ones that have coached under him. His coaching tree, yes.
Yeah, because he is dominant against everybody else. This is one of those things where our conspiracy theory, I'm starting to believe that it's true, where he just sends people out to just tank other teams for the Patriots.
Last year, he lost to Matt Patricia and Mike Vrabel. That's right.
Was that week two? Week two was Matt Patricia. Okay, there we go.
The week two bump for former Belichick coaches. Yeah.
Interesting. Interesting.
There was our Barstool Bets. Go ahead and follow all of it, Barstool Bets.
But some kid is tweeting week two trends like, this team is 10-0 in their last 10 week twos. Yeah, it makes a difference.
That's the dumbest trend of all time. Hey, Hank, your underdog.
This is tough. I'm torn.
But I'm going to go with the sucker pick and take the Colts. Ooh.
Do you know that they are retiring Steve McNair's jersey? I did know that, but I forgot it, and I already said it, so I'm sticking with it. Okay, Eddie George and Steve McNair being retired.
Eddie George, I would assume, is going to come out in Steve McNair's jersey, not a dry eye in the house. Distractions.
Too many distractions. Because they're doing a halftime ceremony? Okay, that's a good point.
Interesting. All right, so you like the Colts.
You like Jacoby Brissett on the road. Okay.
Potentially swag. Okay.
Potentially swag. The only thing I'll say.
This would be a half point built into that line just in the event swag gets in. Defense of this is the Mike Vrabel rule I made last week where if you doubt Mike Vrabel, he will embarrass you.
Now that the Titans are favorites, you can go against that rule because everyone thinks they're going to win especially the steve mcnair retirement game also i don't hate that pick now that i'm thinking about it because adam vinatieri really shat the bed last week like they should have won that game but he what do you miss like three kicks extra point two field goals do you think uh gonna show up to eddie george's retirement why probably not oh probably not. Yeah, that'd be awkward.
Okay, so you have... Did he get a plus one? You have...
He's the only one that got a plus one. You have the Dolphins as your underdog.
Yep. I have...
Well, my bonus underdog is also the R-Words. Redskins plus six at home.
Well, you can't... It's a bonus.
We're not... This doesn't count towards my picks.
It's just a bonus. Okay.
I'm putting out there for the people. Okay.
I like that pick. Our words are plus five and a half, plus six.
We'll give you plus six for the bonus. I'm back on my bullshit.
I'm taking the Falcons as my underdog. I don't give a fuck.
I don't hate that pick. Well, I mean, I just, I will bet on the Falcons.
You need to intervention. I do, but here's my problem is, and I think most gamblers can relate can relate to this when you lose on a team you then chase that team forever until you get get satisfaction right right now i have lost betting against unc and i am now like i'm gonna chase them for the rest of the college football season until i get i demand satisfaction right you could get yourself in trouble that way oh yeah if they win the national championship i'll be broke.
Yeah, you start chasing the Washington Generals. I don't care.
With the Falcons, I agree with you. I think that they're actually a good pick this week.
Their defense stinks. You know what? They're like a siren song just enticing you into bed on them every single week.
I mean, it's just Matt Ryan, Julio Jones, Calvin Ridley. I'm watching you.
You're like a bird flying into this nice open air. I can see that there's a window right in front of you.
I'm trying to tell you it's a window. You're going to fly into the building.
And literally last week, I did fly into the U.S. Bank, whatever it's called, Minnesota Vikings.
That's what that stadium, yeah. Yeah, it was that bird.
All right, Hank, you're under. My under, I will go with the 49ers and Bengals game.
Just because I'm just, that's just hopefully it doesn't show up on red zone. Got it.
You hate it so much. I like that.
You should write a letter to the city of Cincinnati, Hank, complaining about obscenity and vulgarity. Yes.
This game is disgusting. Gosh, you're really going in.
Damn. No, I know what you're saying, though.
Since you already have said that it's going to be a shitty game, that you want it to be shitty to feel right about yourself. Right.
They're going to Red Zone all the time and be like, fuck, I might be interested in this game, and I'm going to sound like an idiot. Yeah.
God knows I don't want to do that. The game that Red Zone forgets.
It's always nice. Would it kind of feel like you were a bad boy, though, if they put it on that game? You're like, oh, this is kind of exciting.
This feels naughty and wrong because I said how bad it was. That's doubtful, though, because the game will probably stick.
All right. My over? Yes.
I'm going to take. No, under.
My under. I'm going to take Titans Colts, 43 and a half.
I think the Titans aren't going to put up points like they did last week. Okay.
All right. My under, I'm going to take.
Also, sorry to interrupt, but the Titans Colts just feels like it's always a 17-10 game, no matter where it is. The Broncos-Bears.
I think they could play for 10 games in a row and they won't hit 40.5. I don't trust either offense and I trust both defenses.
You really hate Joe Flacco. I really do think he's bad.
And I don't think people are talking enough about how bad he is. You haven't seen him throw the football in that thin air

though. Until you change your mind, I

will continue to, until you say, hey

I'm starting to think Joe Flacco

might not be good anymore, I will have to keep saying

it for us. I am chasing the

Joe Flacco is good take. Like for eight

years. No, wait, the Super Bowl

was 2011?

12? 12.

Seven years.

Alright, Hank, you're

over to end the picks.

See you next time. What is 2011? 12? 12.
12. Seven years.

All right, Hank, you're over to end the picks.

See, this is why it's actually probably worse that I did actually look at this before this segment

because all my picks are sucker picks but the Saints and Rams.

It feels like an over, yeah.

Okay, here's a rule, though.

Here's a rule.

When you see a game like Saints and Rams

and you say, I'm going to bet the over and you lose, you still won because you can't take the under in that game.

Like that's a rule where if you see that, it's like it's like when Oklahoma State and Oklahoma play when they play Bedlam, you either take the over or you don't watch the game.

And if you lose on the over, guess what?

It's it's fine, because if you did that for 100 years, you'd win.

Right.

If you bet the under in this game, you're essentially rooting for America to not have fun correct and that's fucked up to do correct there are a lot of other people out there besides you don't be selfish so it's a free bet in my opinion but you will have to pay if you lose yep but it is a free bet but technically free free bet all right pft you're over my over is jags texans 43 and a half oh i like both offenses i like the texans off you like garter minchute you know You know what? The Texans offense. Baker Mayfield 2.0.
You know, I just hope they don't ruin Deshaun Watson for the rest of us. Like, they're going to ruin this kid, and I'm really broken up about that.
And so I hope they don't do that. And then, wait, but so here's a fun fact about the Gardner snake that I picked up this week.
You ready? Yep. This was tweeted out by Antonio Bryant.
So misleading blue checkmark next to AB wide receiver picture. It's actually not Antonio.
He stole from a story, but yeah. It's AB 89.
Gardner Minshew's dad. So Gardner Minshew, first of all, is named Gardner Minshew II.
Of course. His dad is named Flint.
Perfect. So there is no Gardner Minshew I.
Even better. Yes.
He's Gardner Minshew II, which I guess he was such an alpha as a kid that his dad wanted to change his name and name himself after his son. Is his grandfather Gardner? I don't know.
I don't know what his grandfather does. Maybe his grandfather is Gardner and it's skipped.
Can you skip a generation like that? Yeah, I think so. You can do whatever you want.
That's pretty cool. I like that, though.
Gardner Minshew. I hope Gardner Minshew sticks.
He seems like a fun guy. Yeah, I like him.
My over is going to be... Actually, I'm going to go with the Cowboys and the Redskins.
Over 46.5. I'm a believer in Case Keenum putting up numbers.
You know Darius Geis is out, though, right? I think he had 18 yards rushing, so I'm not worried. Because he hurt his knee.
Yeah. Okay.
Well, Adrian Peterson. Back.
Is back. Uh-huh.
Yeah. Jay Gruden.
What was that quote he had where he was like, if we had a situation where we could ride Adrian Peterson for 50 carries, we'd play him. It's like, dude, you did that last year.
Yeah, you could have done it. It was called 2018.
Yeah, you can do that. Yeah.
The thing about Jay. You're allowed to.
Jay just doesn't know what's going on jay's entire press conference they might as well just be him going oh you guys saw what happened yeah i'm i am the head coach of the washington redskins at this time uh i'll do a bonus pick as well i like the cardinals ravens over to 46 little bonus i like the bonus pick um all right so we're gonna probably win this weekend i would say 12 and 0 yeah we're Well, 11-1 because you guys are opposite sides of the Patriots-Dolphins. But 11-1 is still possible.
As we're sitting here right now, 11-1 is possible. Yeah, if we're looking at Monday and we're looking back on us winning all these games, we're up on the season.
Yeah, it could be. We made you money.
Yeah, Big Ben, when he said that half the teams lost last week. Yeah, which wasn't true.
Not true. Because there was a tie.

But that was close enough.

I still give Big Ben credit for that because that's the smartest thing he's ever said.

Yeah, and it was wrong.

And it was wrong.

But it was wrong.

But it was still the smartest.

We're getting there, Ben.

Yeah.

That actually, that should just be Big Ben's new concussion protocol.

How many teams lost last weekend?

Exactly.

Doesn't matter.

Every team could tie.

Half lost.

Big Ben gets smarter when he has a concussion.

Yes, absolutely.

All right. Should we do Fantasy Fuck Boys before we get to our interviews? What's up, boys? What's up? It's Salvador Antangelo.
Yeah. My stardom this week is the situation.
Oh, fuck. That's my stardom too.
He's out. He's better than ever.
He's out the slammer. He beat taxes.
He's my fucking hero. Absolutely.
Hell yeah. What's up, fellas? This is Pop.
Wait. What the fuck, dude? You're fucked up, dude.
Back to you. What's up, everybody? It's Salvatore and Tangelo, and this week, my sit-um is Kirk Cousins.
Fuck your cousins. Stick with your brothers and sisters.
Immediate family is greater than extended. So you're fucking your brothers and sisters? You're gonna fuck the people that are closest to you.
No, I'm saying don't. I'm saying forget them.
Forget about it. Incest is in.
My sleeper is loogies. Everyone's talking about spit but people forget once you're going down it's nice to walk down the street and give a nice Okay.
You're like spitting alright. Hell yeah.
Don't spit in Cardi B's mouth. She hates that.
If it's a pussy or a dick then that's dump. Hell yeah.
All right. What's up? This is Poppy Paparella.
I'm starting hanging out in the line at Starbucks and making a cool comment to everybody that gets a pumpkin spice latte. Oh, guess it's that time of year again.
Yeah. PSLs, bitch.
PSLs are back. I'm going to do it until they kick me out or I get a date, whichever comes first.
Fuck, boy, fall. Fuck, boy, fall.
It's going down. I'm sitting John Bolton.
Dang, Johnny boy. You piece of shit.
You look like Andy Reid got a tapeworm and stood in front of a candle for 30 years, you asshole. Your entire life's mission was to work in the White House.
And then you got fired before you could even start a cool war, you stupid fuck. Stick to sport.
I don't know who the fuck that is. My sleeper, I'm sleeping Taysom Hill this weekend.
I love him. You know Sean Payton loves him.
The more man. That's right.
He's a more man because he's more man than you are. He's more man than the rest of you chumps.
I love this guy. But more importantly, that squirrely bastard, Sean Payton, loves him.
He has him do all his household chores. Hey, Sean.
Hey, hey, more. Hey, hey, hey.
Hey, heyom Hill. Hey, hey.
Go drop my kids off. I'm walking over here.
Taysom. Hey.
I barely know him. Hey, Taysom.
Change this light bulb for me. Hey, go get a prostate exam for me, Taysom.
Hey. He'll do anything for that guy, Sean Payton.
Hey. All right.
What's up? I'm going to wrap it up with my name is Tomi Tomatuo. Tommy.
Tommy Two E's. What's up, 7 T's? All right, triple T's.
I'm going to start Kobe Bryant. He's the best coach ever.
Yeah, he coached some 6th graders and totally shamed a girl for liking ballet more than basketball. And his whole team is frowning and looks like they don't want to be there because Kobe's kind of a weirdo.
But he got them to the fourth place, quote-unquote, winners. Winners.
Kobe Bryant, what a coach. Great job, Kobe.
Kick that dancer off your team. Save her for your nightclub.
My sit-em is Jimmy Guapalo. Because the San Francisco 49ers didn't go home after the game in Tampa Bay.
They stayed in Ohio all week long. And Ohio, fun fact about Ohio, it produced the fifth most porn stars in the United States of America.
That's inspirational. That's really up to it.
I actually looked that up. It's fucking crazy.
And my sleeper is porn stars and president. That's what Ohio does.
My sleeper is Lenny Dykstra. Don't sleep on that fucking creep because he's tweeting some weird-ass shit,

and I'm a little worried.

Lenny, the 18-year-old 9-11 thing.

Oof, maroon.

Maroon.

You crossed the line.

You crossed many lines.

My daughter was born nine months after 9-11.

Okay.

Oh, man, Lenny Dykstra.

Dude, what are you doing?

Yeah, that was weird.

It was weird, but then Lenny pulled the expert trick of saying that his intern tweeted out.

And let's all take a moment to think about what the job interview process would be like to become Lenny Dykstra's intern. Can I pay you in Twizzlers? Yeah.
Okay, you're hired. By the way, you guys obviously saw the Kobe Bryant Instagram post, which was so ridiculous.
I did see it. Yeah.
At what point did being a motivational coach demanding like 100% loyalty to your team become a bad thing? Well, we talked about this on Monday, though, the mama mentality. That was the picture was the fourth.
That was their fourth place picture. He used that as motivation.
And then the team ended up winning the championship. Wait.
So this is. Oh, OK.
So the fourth place picture is because he did. Here's our fourth place quote-unquote winner's picture.
And then they ended up winning. Yes.
And talked about how there was a player who cared about ballet more. Right.
I loved it. But then he updated it and was like she only liked doing ballet when we were in fourth place.
So she was a front runner. But now that they're winning, she was like now they're winning.
She loves basketball. Oh.
So she's on the winning team now. Okay.
I missed the game when they lost for ballet. But now that they've turned the season around and now they're winning and she's back and she's on the team.
Got it. I thought Kobe was throwing her under the bus for them finishing in fourth place.
It was a little subtweet. He sub Instagrammed a seventh grader.
Yeah, that's okay. That's fine, though.
That's okay. Who amongst us hasn't? You have to get subtweeted sometimes.
Yes. You might as well learn it early.
I will say that for Kobe Bryant, if he had been like, I love these kids. They're so great.
It's great coaching for them, and they've always been great. We'd be like, okay, Kobe, what do you really feel? Oh, what you really feel is that this lazy-ass fourth grader liked ballet more than basketball.
Fucker. Yeah.
Also, why do you have to practice dancing? I don't know. I feel like I feel like I practice anything.
I feel like dancing. I feel like dancing is one of those things you either have or you don't have.
You don't respect the arts. I'm just a naturally good dancer, I guess.
I never had to practice self-taught. OK, let's get to our interviews.
We're going to do coach Dana Holgerson and then coach Mike Leach. Before we do that, another Larry's pick and Postmates.
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It is Coach Dana Holgerson, the Houston Cougars coach, our good friend. So, Coach, first of all, thank you for not being so Hollywood that you could still talk to some old friends.
There was a moment there where I thought you had forgotten where you came from, and we just were never going to hear from you again. Look, guys, this is Texas, not California, so it's all good, man.
You guys can come down here and see me anytime. You guys are the ones that are Hollywood, not me.
That's very true. We've got a little too big for our britches, yeah.
So, Coach, you're going to be going up against Mike Leach this weekend. You guys, I would assume, are familiar with each other.
Yeah, we kind of go way back. You know, when I started studying this stuff, it dawned on me that he's been there for eight years now.
He's been stuck in Pullman, Washington for eight years. It's pretty amazing to me.
He had such a good run at Texas Tech for ten years. He moved to Key West.
I mean, I've been, you know, shoot, we go way back to 1990, 91, 92, and they're back Iowa Wesleyan Valdosta days. So, yeah, we're pretty familiar with each other.
You know, when I took the Houston job, you know, I know he pops through Houston every now and then, so I was looking forward to reconnecting. And then I looked at the schedule, and Washington State was game three.
So we had a trip to the Bahamas planned that I canceled and haven't really been able to hang out with him here just because he's back on the schedule. But have hung out with him a good bit here over the last five, six, eight years.

Tomorrow night when you guys are – or sorry, Friday – or no, tonight.

This is going to air on Friday.

Can you guys, like before the game, just agree to always go for it on fourth down, no punts?

That would be fun.

Yeah, I like our punter though.

He's a lot better than I am on offense. He's got that thing rolling.
He's been there eight years. They throw it every down.
They're pretty efficient with what they do. This is year one for us, although we have a spectacular quarterback in De'Ara King.
Our punter, Dang Roy, is this 30-year-old Australian guy who's incredibly interesting to talk to. So I used to sell ice cream and got tired of doing that, so he decided to become a punter, which those Australians grew up playing catch with their feet, so they're pretty good at it.
He's fun to talk to, good to hang out with, but is a pretty good punter as well. You could get Mike to agree to that you know i was in the booth with him for eight years and one of the hardest parts of my job was convincing him to punt on fourth down even if it was fourth and 20 it was still a struggle to give him the punt i love that i love that he always wanted to go for it i can see i can see mike leach just like having a disdain for his uh for his punting crew out there.
What is the story with Australian punters, though?

Is there like a pipeline? Do they have specialized camps, or how does that work? No, you just order them online. Just one click? Yeah, that's true.
You can just order them. They did.
They grew up playing catch with their feet. So they're good at kicking the ball.
So, you know, it started to become popular probably, I don't know, 10 years ago or so. I remember Brad Wing for LSU, he pinned us inside the five when, you know, back in 2011 or something like that.
He pinned us inside the five like five times. I'm like, geez.
And, you know, Texas had a really good one a couple years ago. He was all pro first year.
I can't remember his name. They're becoming much more popular.
Really, quite frankly, they just grow up hunting. You can call a certain service over there and order you one.
We've got one coming here next year after this kid graduates. Love it.
I think it was Dixon, the guy that's up in Seattle right now. He's a beast.
Really good. Really, really good.
Coach, what's up with the hair these days? You looked awesome against Oklahoma. You were letting it fly.
What are we thinking? Are we getting a haircut anytime soon, or are we just going to keep going crazy look? You know, Big Cat, I got my haircut before the bowl game. my players last year at WVU wouldn't let me cut it.
And after we lost to Oklahoma and we're out of the Big 12 championship, I cut it. So that would have been around December 1st.
I didn't get it cut until approximately August 1st. So it was really flowing towards the end of summer.
You know, so this is actually what you're looking at is a pretty freshly cut. You know, so it's going to probably go for a while, you know, unless I have some bad luck, then we'll go ahead and shave it off.
Do you ever go back and watch the tape of how awesome you look when you pop the visor off? Because you did it in the Oklahoma game. I'm going to say this, don't be upset about it, but your nips were very erect and um your hair was wild and I was like holy shit this is the coolest coach in America now I don't go back and reflect on that stuff it was it was one of two things I was really excited because we scored her I was really pissed because we turned it over or something like that.

So it's hard to tell.

I'm glad you get a thrill out of it, Big Cat, but I don't go.

Oh, yeah.

I'm going to send you all the pics.

I take, like, if you ever saw my phone roll, it would be actually – I'd probably get arrested by the Holgersons because it would be like,

what's going on here?

You're taking a lot of pictures of Coach.

There's something to be said.

When you guys come into Houston.

Yeah, we'll get down there. Oh, we'll get down there.
I'm excited to be down in Houston. Get down that humidity a little bit.
Big Cat just gave a big thumbs down. I gave a thumbs up because I'm so excited to go to Houston and get on one of those service roads.
And don't forget about the concrete. How do you like the concrete overpasses down there? There's a lot of concrete here.
six million people and it it continues to grow um i've got a place on the 19th floor penthouse deal that's like 10 minutes from university of houston so i'm right in the middle of all that concrete but it saves me on a lot of the i don't i don't have to travel on the concrete very much i look at it but i don't have to travel on on it. Do you miss having a backyard? Because you had a sweet one in West Virginia.
Yeah, I do. I do.
I do. I missed it.
I'm proud of what we did there at West Virginia. And, you know, met all kinds of good people and had a lot of good times in that backyard.
You guys were a part of it a few times. And, you know, we had some killer parties back there.
You know we'd every time we'd win we'd enjoy it you know and we'd have all the the donors and coaches and families come over and we'd build that big fire and we'd reflect on a good victory so you know that's always something that's going to stick with me and I'm going to remember that forever and yeah I do I do miss those days but we're you know we're trying to build something uh something special here down here at the University of Houston it's going to take some time you forget I was there eight years as well so built it into something pretty good and trying to do the same thing here at the University of Houston. Well we're Coug fans now.
Last question for me do you have anything you want to say to your best friend Hank? He misses you. Yeah, Hank, man.
I know. You fighting anybody here lately? No, not anytime soon.
Maybe for Miami, though. Super Bowl.
You're not retired then, huh? No. Well, no, Hank, you should retire, and then it'll sell more tickets if you say you're coming out of retirement.
True, I'm retired. There's nothing that could get me to fight again.
Okay. Unless you're needing me to.
Are you going to take steroids this time? Why, you know, guys? We'll cross that bridge when we get there. Depends who your opponent is, right? Yeah.
Yeah, exactly. Exactly.
I just realized that it's going to be Cougars against Cougars on Friday. Who's your favorite Cougar, coach? It's the battle of the Cougars, man.
Yeah. Yeah, who is your favorite Cougar? John Cougar Mellencamp? Jennifer Aniston.
Yeah. She's a hot one too.
Yeah. There's a lot of Cougars out there.
All right. We're going to be rooting for you just so you know.
We will have Coach Leach on as well, but we are rooting for you. We're Dana guys through and through, and hopefully we see you soon.
So are you going to tell Leach that you're cheering for me?

Oh, yeah.

Yeah, he probably – I mean, he'll probably just go into, like,

a long-winded answer about pirates or some kind of weird history thing.

We don't care.

Guarantee it.

Guarantee it will.

Yes, yes.

Yeah, yeah.

All right, Coach.

Good luck on Friday.

We'll be watching.

I'll be taking pictures.

Sounds good, guys. Always enjoy talking to you all.
All right. right, Coach.
Good luck on Friday. We'll be watching.
I'll be taking pictures. Sounds good, guys.
Always enjoy talking to y'all. All right.
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Okay, here he is, Coach Leach. And now for something completely different.
Okay, we now welcome on Coach Mike Leach. He is a recurring guest of our show.
He's been on the show. Washington State head coach.
We are prepping for the Washington State versus Houston game on Friday night. Two of our friends battling.
So, Coach, we've got to start there. We had Dana on.
We're good friends with Coach Holgerson. We have told Coach Holgerson that we will be rooting for him, but if he had to lose to anyone, it's you.
So are you okay with that? I guess I don't care who you root for. Obviously, you ought to root for us, but to each his own, you know, because there's good decisions and bad decisions in life, so hopefully you make a good one.
But nevertheless, it's a free country, or at it used to be and so um the uh for old times sake you know maybe you can go ahead and root for us okay but but here's the other part when we had coach holgerson on we he has agreed to no punts for the entire game are you in agreement will you do no punts for the entire game if they do no punts we'll do no punts i I love it. We've got to do that.
That would be such a great game. You and him obviously go way, way back.
How would you describe Coach Holgerson and your experiences with him? You know, he used to be kind of a bouncy guy. It was funny because you know, he was kind of perky.
He would try to run with the cool crowd,

or at least he thought was cool,

which obviously that was hard for me to take seriously at all.

And then, you know, but he was kind of a,

he liked football the best. He liked football the best.
I always thought he was a little better at basketball. Really? Because he'd play football, go to football practice.
Then he'd go, you know, pick up in the gym there at Iowa Wesleyan with the basketball team, and he was better than most of them. Interesting.
Interesting. Now, what about his hair? He was a high vertical jump guy that was slow.
Ooh, that's a killer combo. He's a big rebounder.
That's a killer combo. Yeah, he was a good rebounder.
Mainly he was elusive when he dribbled the ball and he could shoot it real well. What about his hair? Do you bust his balls at all about his hair? Because we do that from time to time.
His hair has its life of its own. I don't know if he realizes he doesn't have much of it left but he still rocks that visor and he looks great doing it.
I don't mess with his hair. I don't mess with his hair.
That's a sensitive subject to some. He's an easy target, although I get my share from time to time.
And I don't mess with his hair. I messed it up from time to time, but I haven't – no, I don't really comment on his hair.
Okay, okay. When you were working together, was he getting into the Red Bull habit that he has to this very day? Oh, but he did wear the visor.
That was like kind of a rebellion issue. So Coach Mummy wore a visor.
He wears a visor. I've never really reconciled wearing half a hat, so I've never worn a visor.
I like that. That's like a football coach going goth as they decide to put on a visor to rebel against uh against the head guy i saw i saw a quote earlier today i want to talk real quick about uh your guy gardner minshu had a pretty good game for the jaguars um over the weekend and he looked pretty accurate doing it i saw i read a story that yeah he broke a record yeah he i think he's gonna be a pretty good player and i saw the story that said that he used to do band workouts in the locker room naked or just wearing a jock strap did you ever walk in on that uh yeah he would uh well not really band workouts uh there's a combination of dancing and running in place so he would um like after a game because he's a he's a very he's like one of the most passionate players i've ever coached so uh he's one of the most passionate players uh that i've uh that i've ever coached uh after games so he'd get undressed he put on his avi headband on, you know, just for the, the, the sweat and to keep his hair out of his eyes.
You know, everybody thinks a lot of that's for show, but it's pretty functional under a helmet. And then, um, then, uh, he'd have the aviators on the headband on the jock on and, uh, music would be loud, you know be running in place I mean just running in place celebrating the win okay one time I got a funny story for you so um uh Steve Spurrier senior you know came to watch our game and we kind of let him patrol the sidelines and we had a thriller against Utah so we played Utah here and um and um and you know it's a back and forth game and it's a war and they're like the most physical team in our conference but we've had their number over the years um and they've always they've been close games but um you know we've come out on top on a lot of them uh well, several in a row.
But anyway, so then it's pretty much the last drive. Okay, there's not much time left, and they're good at eating up the clock anyway.
So we're on the minus 10-yard line or so. Let's see, it was an 89.

So anyway, Gardner goes back, throws it to Aesop Winston, and Winston catches it, goes upfield, makes one guy miss, makes another guy miss twice, 89 yards for a touchdown to kind of seal this thing up. so after the game

and Coach Spurrier is like

I consider it for a touchdown to kind of seal this thing up.

So after the game, and Coach Spurrier is like, I consider a total mentor. He's one of those guys that made you want to coach, made you want to be a part of the game.
And so he comes up to me, he says, great game, great game. He says, had it in the bag the whole time, didn't you? Then he goes out.

Then he goes out then he goes uh comes to the locker room he says where's the receiver where's i want to see you receive the receiver so esoph's taking his gloves off and he says uh goes over to esoph all right my He says, good catch, great play, way to play.

He goes, where's the quarterback?

I want to see the quarterback.

Gardner's in his jock, aviators, and headband,

running in place to the music, arms high, the whole thing.

And he looks over, he sees him, just sort of points at him and says, all right, my man, all right, my man, good game. Not going to go over and have an extended conversation.
What's something he wanted to touch at the time? Yeah, yeah, I'd imagine. So this game on Friday night, Cougars versus Cougars, you are famous for breaking down mascot battles.
One, how are we going to break down a Cougar versus Cougar? Whose Cougar is tougher? And two, can I throw a couple mascot battles for you and you can give me some thoughts on them? All right, the live mascots are automatically quite tough. Yep.
I can't remember what their mascot looks like.

I imagine it's a guy with a Cougar costume.

Definitely Butch.

Butch is iconic.

So Butch wins that battle for sure.

Yep.

Their Cougar, I'm looking at it, their Cougar looks a little meaner than your Cougar.

I'm going to say it right now.

Yeah, but ours is a friendly, happy cerebral, but he can get down and dirty when he needs to. Plus, he's got an actual name, Butch T.
Cougar. That's pretty good.
So he's distinguished, and he has a name and is internationally recognized. Okay, so Washington State, you've done unbelievable things with that program but we want to see washington state get to the top get to the college football playoffs so i'm going to give you the the top five teams right now you tell me who wins cougar versus tiger the clemson tigers well they don't have a live tiger uh and his head's more top heavy than Butch's it appears butch is all is often a tall guy and and they try not to reveal their identity i have caught them a couple times because you'll leave a fundraiser and a fundraiser is usually an older crowd you know where butch will be at and some cheeraders will be there.
And then as you're waiting for the ride from the facility, all of a sudden, you know, there'll be a guy that looks like a student. He'll be like 6'3 or 6'4 sometimes, and just sweaty as can be.
I mean, just still sweaty, you know. And so I'm thinking, now, who would this guy be? I mean, just some guy came by, took a jog.
I mean, just still sweaty, you know. And so I'm thinking, who would this guy be?

I mean, just some guy came by, took a jog. I mean, what is this? And then it occurs to me, this has to be Butch.
Because, you know, sweating underneath all that carpet and everything in the midst of this event, you've got to sweat under there, I assume. And son of a gun, it's's butch and uh so our butches tend to be uh reasonably good size of dudes too so i gotta go with i've gotta go with butch okay and then what about uh the cougar verse the elephant alabama crimson Well, if they get a real elephant, we're in trouble.
Yep. If it's a real genuine elephant, we're in trouble.
Can't say I've seen the elephant mascot, or at least I don't recall. But if it's a guy in a costume, I'm going to go with the elusiveness of Butch.
Okay. The elephant's trunk, it leaves something to be desired.
Yeah. Alabama.
It's kind of like this floppy thing. All right.
Okay. He's got to carry that around.
Some people have that problem. Yeah.
I would assume Butch takes down the Georgia Bulldog. We'll give Butch that.
It is a live Bulldog, though. We do have to say that.
We do have to say that. I'll say LSU will kill Butch because Mike the Tiger is live.
How about this one? I'm with you on Mike the Tiger. How about this one? Notre Dame.
The Leprechaun versus Butch T. Cougar.
That Leprechaun better actually be magic because otherwise I'm going with Butch. Okay, good answer.
All right, so that was the breakdown of the top ten. I mean, we jumped around there of Butch versus other mascots.
Do we know what Butch T. Cougar's middle name is? Touchdown, I assume.
I like that. That's a good answer.
That's nice. That's nice.
Also, I just looked it up. I don't know if this changes your mind at all.

Shasta is the name of the University of Houston's Cougar,

and I think they actually have a live Cougar.

Shasta 4 is live on campus,

but they also have a guy in a suit that comes out for the games, obviously.

I suggest we try to avoid the live Cougar.

There's one up here allegedly running around my neighborhood here in Pullman,

which hopefully they get that guy with the dogs on Mountain Man and chase him around a little bit.

Tie him up?

Yeah, run him up to the high country.

But from what I understand, they used to have a live cougar here uh when i was at byu they had a live cougar like a year or two before i got there but yeah a live cougar that you'd have your hands full with that uh and and that tiger's i've been past that tiger before coming out the tunnel at LSU. And that, shoot, that Tiger's huge.
All right, my last question, SeatGeek question. If you want to go to the game on Friday night, put in promo code TAKE.
You get $10 off your SeatGeek purchase. I figured you would be the perfect guy to ask.
We have a long-running thing with our producer, Hank. He is convinced that he can catch a fish with his hands like a bear.
Have you ever seen that, and do you think he can? Yeah, I've seen people do that. And I don't know if he can or not because I don't know his experience level.
He's probably a really quick guy. Nope.
you get but you try to

there's guys that kind of have the patience and technique you know because there's a point where i'm going to try to hit the fish with a rock or a stick you know i mean i'll try once i'm like the the the old commercial that they had on how many licks does it get to the the center of a tootsie pop right so you know they everybody's trying to lick and they bite and they take the tootsie pop to the wise old owl yeah and the owl says he licks on it once says one looks on it twice says two licks on it the third time says three then he bites into it he says three it takes three and um so so my patience level is about like that owl's and um but those guys with the hands what they'll do is they just kind of back them into the corner of the kind of what's essentially a puddle there in the stream or whatever. And some of these guys can do it, you know.
I still don't believe Hank can do it. It's going to be tough for Hank.
Yeah. I don't know if Hank can or not.
Hank's a lefty. Well, that probably helps because I'm lefty, too.
Lefties are crafty people. Is that true? The fish are used to going against the righty probably.
Yeah. Yeah, you can get him crossed up.
You can get you one. All right, Coach, I got one.
I don't know if fish can fight against the southpaw. Probably not.
Probably not. I got one last question for you, then we'll let you go.
I know that you taught that football and insurgent warfare class last semester up there. Are you going to use any of the plays from that class that you put out as an assignment for your students to draw up? You know, we've got them in a file, which we look at and observe.
And not always exact, but some of them have some kind of clever concepts, you know, because

the other guy always sees something you don't. You get caught in the middle of it, and you're worrying about where somebody's foot is, and somebody's hand is, and is their ass too high, or something like that.
And, you know, sometimes there's some obvious things that people can see, but there were some good ideas, and they weren't all just double reverse flea flicker, triple passes, and that type of thing. You know what I mean? Some were pretty sound, well-thought-out plays.
I love, by the way, just as an aside, the last thing, I love that when someone asked you, I don't know when they asked you, what your favorite football plays were, the number one is four verticals at any time. Oh, yeah, everybody runs it.
Everybody runs it. And on four verticals, you're always open at some point.
You're either open underneath the coverage, or you're open when the coverage transitions, or you're open behind the coverage. Or if you're cutting across seams, you're open in the windows.
You're always open somewhere. The difficult thing is executing that execution where the quarterback's ready to throw when the receiver's ready to catch.
Yeah, yeah. All right, Coach.
Well, good luck on Friday night. Say hello to our good friend Dana for us.
We're rooting for Coach Holgerson, but if you win, you're our second place in our heart. If Coach Holgerson doesn't win, we want you to win.
All right, if he doesn't win, we probably will. Oh, well, tie.
Tie would be great. No, you can't tie in college.
Okay, maybe go so many overtimes that everyone

falls asleep. Well,

as long as we're going to be

up all night, we might as well have some overtime.

Yeah, exactly. And remember, no

punting. Yeah, no punting.
You just got to go up

to him and say, hey, part of my take said we're

doing no punts. He'll know.

All right.

Thanks so much, Coach. All right.
Great talking

to you guys. All right.
Take care. We're going to get right back to the show.
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Apply today and make your tomorrow amazing. All right, back to part of my take.
Okay, let's get to some segment. What do you got, Hank? I'm just going to give the last.

So it's the Vikings, Redskins, Rams, Browns, and the fifth pick will be on Barstool Sports

Advisors.

Barstool Sports Advisors.

And when can we watch that?

And where can we watch it?

You can watch it.

It comes out Friday on YouTube, Barstool Bets, or you can watch it Sunday morning on the

Barstool Sports website at 1130.

I thought we moved the time.

What time?

I don't know. I think it's earlier in the day.
I think it's Sunday mid-morning. I think it's 10.
Barstool Bets YouTube on Friday night. Watch it anytime you want this weekend.
10 a.m. I think it is.
Do a little Hot Leaf. Watch it.
No, we don't advocate that. That show is made for the Hot Leafs.
Don't do that. No, it's not.
Don't do that. You're telling people to use drugs and watch our show, then don't forget all the picks.
Hey, have you ever watched Barstool Sports Advisors on weed? Don't don't forget all the pics yeah that's actually a good thing so do do that take a mind eraser before you watch bar get really high smelling salts and bang your head against the wall yeah okay let's get some segments first up we have our fire fest of the week pft what do you got for fire fest of the week my fire fest My Fyre Fest of the Week is literally a Fyre Fest.

They canceled the Area 51 festival.

So the Storm Area 51 thing is officially shut down.

I think you have to say they got to the guy that was planning it.

The government did.

And they told him to shut it down.

Although I do respect this quote from him.

He was saying, it's a fantastic relief.

I've had a lot of concerns leading up to it.

Just to see those all come to a head 11 days before the event and then cancel it's kind of a relief that's got to be a pretty sweet plan like canceling a giant festival that you helped promote dude a week out he was telling everyone in his family like can't do it that week gotta gotta go storm area 51 like gotta get a flight gotta figure out food and all that stuff to to cancel that? Yeah. It would feel amazing.
Unbelievable. He was going to be in charge of tens of thousands of people.
I think there were, like, over a million people that said that they were going to attend on Facebook. So this guy actually probably just worked for the government all along and got a list of people that we can then arrest.
Yes, a list of people that should not be allowed in Nevada. But there's nobody out there.
Like, you can go go ahead and still storm area 51 if you want to there's not one guy that's going to be leading the charge right that's true it's the people's festival i say it's like a if you build it they will come thing for randy quaid they will get if enough rvs show up in the desert at once randy quaid and tom from blink 182 will show up and play a concert there's definitely going to be a couple random people who show up who like start you know like said they were going and then hopped in a car a week ago like we're going to just head out there and then going across yeah they're like fuck it's over yeah well those people might not have the internet yeah right would be my my hope at least um it reminded me a lot of gathering of the juggalos the way that it was set up that that event where it's like 90 percent journalists now free fago 10 percent actual attendees that's what this was probably going to be every uh protest slash riot in portland exactly it's mostly people trying to get retweets based off videos of the protest it's like 100 journalists and then five people in antifa and five nazis and then they just push them together yeah they're like look at how. Okay, Hank, Fyre Fest.
My Fyre Fest of the week is that the USA Celtics lost to Serbia today and guaranteed that there was the worst basketball finish ever. Tough week for Serbians.
First, you got Djokovic retiring. Good week for Serbians.
They beat the USA Celtics. But now they've awoken a sleeping giant in our basketball team and you know what carmelo's on the fly there no i'm serious oh shout out carmelo there have you seen the the gym that we need to go to this gym it's ridiculous this gym that has like runs every day so i think it was bleach report posted a james harden has found new ways to dominate and it was the first two things were highlights of James Harden in this gym.
And then all of a sudden it was just Mello going to the hole. He's sneaking his way into other people's highlights to be like, who's that guy? He looks good.
I love that. I fucking love that.
Carmelo's hacking into other people's highlight tapes. He's doing everything he can.
But yeah, so basically the internet, NBA, Twitter, everyone's been roasting the Celtics because there was four of the major teams.

I'm so sorry.

And it's tough to defend because it's like, you know.

Save it for do your pod.

It's the worst finish ever.

Yeah, no, that is tough.

So are we of the mindset that Kawhi.

But championship DVD season.

For.

The Celtics.

Oh.

Starting with USA losing to Serbia.

Okay, the season starts today.

Got it.

So it's not Brad Stevens coaching, which might be an issue. It's pop.
But is Kawhi going to play for pop? No. No.
It was all like nobody's. But I'm saying when it counts.
It was nobody's. When it gets down to nut-cutting time and it's not the JV roster for Brad Stevens.
In the Olympics? I don't think Kawhi's ever participated. participated.
So I don't know if he. Yeah, I saw that.
I think I think Tom Thibodeau did a he was like the color guy on one of the games because he was trending and it sounded I didn't listen to it, but it sounded like he just snored into a microphone for for two hours. That's pretty good.
Yeah. When Tom Thibodeau was trending, I like very nervous because he's not getting another coaching job.

He was a finalist for the 2016 U.S. Men's Olympic team.

Oh, okay.

Who I was.

So there you go.

Was that Pop or Coach K?

That was, I believe it was Pop.

It might have been Coach K.

Coach K does this thing where he just coaches everyone in the U.S.

and then has LeBron call all these recruits.

And then LeBron tells him that he's going to get paid by Coach K.

And no one seems to care.

So, yeah, it's the conglomeration of two people that are really good at paying people under the table.

Right.

Thank you. recruits and then LeBron tells him that he's going to get paid by Coach K and no one seems to care.
So yeah, it's the conglomeration of two people that are really good at paying people under the table. Right.
Exactly. That's a lot of money being funneled.
My fire fest is the Chicago Cubs. They're the most maddening team, frustrating team I've ever watched.
Not really ever, but they're getting pretty close. They just want to toy with everyone's hearts and they win one game, lose one game two games don't score for a week then they look awesome you darvish is somehow their best pitcher i uh am at the point where i'm just i don't even know what i want anymore because they're fighting for that second wild card spot which is pretty much just a way to lose in the first or second round yeah uh but yeah and on top of that i was like having a bad week because the cubs were pissing me off and then i watched the new dog the bounty hunter on wednesday night and it wasn't that good oh i'm sorry to hear that well the first episode was good the second one he was gonna fight this dude and the dude just went into his house to try to get a gun and dog left well yeah you don't think he's like go get your gun bitch and then they just hightailed it out of there and i was like like, I want to see this.
Yeah, that's really tough. But back to the Cubs real quick.
Do you think that all the speculation about Theo leaving and going to the Red Sox is having an effect? No, the speculation that Joe Maddon's going to get fired is probably true. And yeah, he's probably going to get fired.
Okay. And a lot of things are going to probably change.
And Jorge Soler has 44 home runs. Whatever.
Okay, so that was my fire fest. Also, I'm addicted to saying I'm going to meltdown.
When did it start? From the Falcons? The Falcons got you into it? That was a start. And then I threatened to meltdown if the Bears lose.
And then I also threatened. I threw out a meltdown.
I was watching the Chicago Sky in the playoffs. And Brittany Griner got hurt in the first half.
And I said, if the Sky can't beat the Brittany Griner-less Mercury, I'm going to melt melt down that's and at that point i was like i've saturated the meltdown market you've been watching chernobyl too much yes so it's pretty much worked its way into your brain i pressed what was it kind of ironic that you said that for about yeah yeah the alpha z4 the carbon tipped i pressed i pressed the button shoved into your brain yes so i'm gonna melt down all right uh put one. Justify is a cheater.
The horse. I hope you're sitting down.
If you have kids in your car, tell them to shut up and plug their ears. Horse racing is not on the up and up.
Yeah. I guess horses can't be role models anymore.
But Justify tested positive for using a banned substance. Yep.
Probably knowingly. And then.
Yeah. Oh, yeah.
He definitely was like, give me all the steroids. And then he hasn't come out and given an excuse, like whether he had fake cancer or that he was trying to recover from an injury.
Or pretended that he doesn't speak English in front of Congress. Yeah, or that he ate tainted horse meat in Mexico.
Yeah. None of these things have happened.
So as far as we know, justifies guilty as sin. And his triple crown win should be, what, vacated? Are we doing that?

Yeah, I mean, I can't remember who I bet on,

but I didn't bet on Justify, so I would like my

money back. Absolutely.
My bookie, if you're out there

listening to me, they should just, you know what they should do?

They should fucking brand him with an asterisk.

Yes. Like a cattle brand.
He's going to have

to wear that on his hindquarters

for the rest of his days.

We should have known when his baseball cap didn't fit anymore because his skull was so fucking sick. Yeah, he was huge.
Yeah, his fucking horse head. I just don't know how I'm going to watch horse racing anymore now that I know that there's people cheating.
Yeah, it's fucked up. All-time worst horses.
Number one, Nyquist still in agreement. Number two, Justify.
Number three. John Elway.
Yep. Number four.
Never like Mr. Ed.
Trojan Horse. The Trojan Horse is bad.
Mr. Ed.
No, Trojan Horse was cool because it got his condoms. Oh, that's true.
Yeah. So that's the whole thing.
Okay. Good point.
Right there. Good point.
Number four. I don't know.
There's got to be a horse out there that's just kind of annoying. I wasn't a fan of Mr.
Ed. Yeah.
It was. I mean.
Because he was way past our time. past our time.
I thought horses could talk before our time, actually. Yeah, that's true.
And then when I realized I didn't, I was like, fuck horses. All right.
Could you imagine just going back in time? Like your only option for entertainment on TV is to watch a show about a fucking talking horse. That was it.
Holy shit. You had a talking horse.
What about going back in time to the only way to get around was a horse? Yes, but I actually think it'd be worse. Riding a horse would be fun.
Being like, hey, what's on TV tonight? Oh, it's the fucking talking horse again? Yeah, and that's it. That's your only channel.
That was as good as special effects got was a horse with peanut butter in its mouth. Yeah.
That was moving its jar around so it looked like it was talking. No, thank you.
Yeah, and there's one NFL game on a week. One college game you can watch usc play and then they cut away from the nfl game to switch to fucking hide sometimes damn i don't know how people did it they didn't have a green zone no they did not how could you ever survive without a green zone pr 101 miami heat so bang bros yep offered 10 million dollars to get the naming rights for the miami heat arena they did um you gotta take it yeah i mean why not you gotta take it i don't see why not it's it's great marketing for your city great marketing for your city you are kind of a porn city it's like la maybe fans will actually come early yeah oh there you go first time bad sports time um so i love this move by Bang Bros.
I would like to see one place. This seems like a minor league stadium should do this.
Like someone who has nothing to lose. Have Bang Bros night.
Or Bang Bros lounge. Yeah.
Because you know how many horny dudes would be like, oh, I'm going to go there and there's definitely going to be porn stars I can fuck. All the fellas just take a break from their families in the seventh inning stretch and just go hang out and it's literally just a bar yeah it's just a bar you're like what it's a bar

with like a bartender wearing a bra yeah fellas this is this is heaven am i right you could

probably actually make the bang bros lounge also one of those places where you know like when the

iron bowl comes around and they say well free tickets for the iron bowl and then they just

arrest everyone who hasn't done child support the bang bros lounge if you go if you pay for a ticket

at the bang bros lounge you should just be arrested because you're too much of a porn guy

It's pre-crime, absolutely, if you walk in the door. They should sponsor the black hole.
That would be a natural fit. What about it? Check this out.
Bang Bros presents the black hole, and then one section is called incognito mode. What about the Bang Bros we make instead of the dog pound, because Cleveland hasn't done well with that, the brown hole.
Ooh, that's good. And then Cleveland and then Ohio porn stars.
Dog pound town. Yeah.
Just call it pound town instead of dog pound. Dog pound town.
Yeah, that would be a little. Doggy, pound your dog.
We gave you enough to work with. Last up, before we get to FAQ, just chill out, man.
Dwight Howard bought a car because of Thanos?

Yeah, he got a purple car because he wants to be like Thanos.

He's inspired by Thanos.

He wants to destroy everything? He wants to destroy everything.

So he went from being Superman to being, yeah, especially his dog, R.I.P.

Tony Stark.

Tony Stark.

So, yeah.

Dwight Howard, I don't know.

He's doing the thing that LeBron did when he went to Miami.

It was like, I'm going to turn myself into a villain. villain yeah but what's wrong with liking a heel you liked heels wwe it's the same thing i mean too soon boogie cousins just that's fucked up hank dwight howard literally took boogie cousins roster spot the other just the other just chill out man was peyton manning uh joe thomas told the story that peyton manning called him up when they wanted to trade for Joe Thomas to the Broncos, and he told Joe Thomas to go poop on the GM's desk to demand a trade.
Just chill out, Peyton Manning. Chill out, Peyton Manning.
I mean, that is Peyton Manning. Yeah.
I'm surprised he didn't say go put your balls on a trainer's face. Yeah, all of his good ideas start with take off your pants inside a team facility.
Yeah. He's a one-trick pony.
All right, let's finish up the week with FAQs. We got No Guest Monday and then Big Guest Wednesday.
Should we just start calling it Big Guest Wednesday? Physically. Should we say who we have? He's physically huge.
He's taller than Gronkka. Keep it out.
Okay. Yeah, that out, but keep it in.
Okay. Speaking of the Browns, Big Cat, does Big Cat secretly hate the Browns? It seems like he's very quietly rooting for them to fail this year.
No. I actually really like the Browns, and I've long said that I like Browns fans, not Cavs fans, which makes no sense.
My problem with Browns fans right now, and we have one in the office, Jeff D. Lowe, who's very talented.
You can't spend all offseason saying you're going to win the Super Bowl and then after week one be like, I didn't have my hopes up. I expected this.
This is classic. But they're already saying Jeff told me this earlier today.
If they win this week, it's a reset on the season. Right.
So he's resetting. Right.
But he's going back to zero. He's not despairing.
you do like needling browns fans well here but you understand what i'm saying like the browns fans if you if you get super super excited which you have every right to do you can't backtrack it that quickly and be like well we never expected anything to happen because we're the browns just to own it just be like you know what that was a dumpster fire of a week one we thought we were super bowl chance we're not it's reset time that's all it is i'm just saying just be some be consistent i'm cool with getting way overhyped for your team i do it very often why is the vagina area a triangle we call it a box i don't know who what kind of like geometry shaped people you're sleeping with i don't think a vagina is a triangle it. It's more of a diamond.
It's a diamond. Yeah, it's a rhombus.
Yeah. It's definitely a sideways box.
It's definitely a quadrilateral of some sort. That's like an oval.
It's like a kayak. There you go.
Do you think anyone has like a box, like a box, like a box shaped vagina? Just a square, just a rectangle. Perfect square.
Probably a porn star from Ohio. Oh, jeez, man.
Don't shame. That is a good question, though.
The box? I think anything that a guy can put his dick into qualifies as a box. It's a box.
Yeah, that's our rule of thumb. Hey, guys.
As someone with big nipples, I've always had a problem wearing the right shirts. If I wear one that fits with the rest of my body well, my nipples will still poke out,

which is obvious to my friends and in pictures.

My girlfriend recently suggested getting this product called nipple tape.

That's apparently a fashion trend used by male models and celebrities to hide their nips.

Do I give in and try my girlfriend's suggestion,

or do I own it and let them fly?

Well, I have big nipples myself.

Big old pepperoni nipples.

Dark nipples. You need to add that.
They are. myself.
Big old pepperoni nipples. Dark nipples.

You need to add that.

They are.

They're like spoiled pepperonis. The burnt pepperonis.

We should...

Someone should send me those.

I'll try them out and I'll let you know.

I do like how they've rebranded from being pasties to being just like cool fashionable nipple tape.

No, it's just a pasty.

Have you ever thought about getting the pasties with the tassels on them? Yeah, I'll do that. I'll do whatever.
Send me some nipple stuff. Send me four.
Sup Hank, question for you boys. Is a dog's tail always wagging and they make it stop, or is it always still and they make it wag? Whoa.
There's nothing better than your dog's tail wagging just by the sight of you or your voice.

That's the best feeling ever.

That's when people freak out, oh, dogs are everything.

Dogs are everything when you just say your dog's name and the tail wag.

So Leroy, as we've discussed, has gone blind recently.

So if he just hears me walking by him, if he can hear my feet on the ground,

he doesn't get up because he's too lazy, but he just stays laying perfectly flat on the ground.

He just hears the... The best.
It is pretty cool. The best.
It's like get up because he's too lazy, but he just stays laying perfectly flat on the ground. You just hear the...

The best.

It is pretty cool.

The best.

It's like I did that.

Yeah.

Hank, your dog?

Oh, yeah, you hate pets.

Nope.

So what's the answer?

What about it?

What was it?

Is a dog's tail always wagging and they make it stop,

or is it always still and they make it wagging?

They make it wagging.

They make it wagging.

That's them asking for a boop.

Yep.

And Morse code.

After this week's shirtless embarrassment... What? Will PFT be getting a spray tan anytime soon? Well, first of all, I think if there's an opposite of a spray tan, that's probably what I should be looking at.
I was very red. It was a terrible visual.
I'll be the first to admit it. I think you might have tried to get that visual bad.
What do you mean? You look like you were taking a shit. You're right.
It had a lot lot to do with my body position if you think i was trying to look like that absolutely not i i had a bad neck position i did this i did this yeah that's that you can not do that don't screen grab you try to do that whatever you do no but i didn't do it on purpose but i feel like you know when you're doing that no i no i did not realize that i was gonna look bad and then i had the the big red body looked like i had all. What are they called? The thetans from Scientology looked like I was just swimming in thetans like I was fucking Alex Jones or whatever STD he has.
It makes his whole body red when he gets mad. So, yeah, it was a it was a tough.
It was a tough experience for me. I'm not getting a spray tan.
I'm not getting spray tan, but I am on a diet. I'm on I'm on hour 18 and it sucks.
Nice. Probably a Jimbo.
I recently relocated for work and don't know anyone in this dirt bag city, Louisville. Louisville.
I met this chick in my apartment complex when I moved in and one thing led to another and we hooked up. Now she will not leave me alone and pretty much spies on what I'm doing or who is coming and going into my room.
No clue on how to get this crazy lady away from me. What would you do in this situation? It's going to be a long-year lease SMH.
Marry her. Yeah, you either got to tie the knot, scare her away.
Marry her. You got to start stalking her.
Marry her. Either that or you could just let her watch you bringing a lot of really weird shit into your apartment that nobody likes.
Like bring a big tuba. Or just get one of those sex swings and drag it in.
Yeah. So she's like, what the fuck? Or just carry in a whole bunch of rolled up rugs so it looks like you're bringing human bodies into your apartment.
That's not a bad idea either. Yeah.
I like that. Or just like a bunch of corn CDs and Limp Bizkit albums.
Yeah, never shower again.

Ever.

All right, last one.

In honor of Sam Darnold, have any of you guys ever had mono?

And if so, how did you get it?

No.

No, never had mono.

Me neither.

I was not cool enough to kiss enough girls at all.

I was always jealous of people that did because I got to miss school for like two weeks and

just chill.

It does sound pretty sweet.

I'll be honest with you.

Of all the diseases that you can have, mono's got to be top five for me.

Thank you. Of all the diseases that you can have, mono's got to be top five for me.
Yeah. Yeah.
What's the disease? What's the disease? No, lupus is bad. Yeah, exactly.
What's the disease that Robbie Fox has where he's like his circulation when he's in cold? That just seems like a pretty sick disease because you can basically just say, I can't be cold. Yeah.
No, he can't be cold and he can't be hot either. Right.
He's like,

he's warm. Temperature control.
Yeah, he's

cold-blooded. He adapts

to his environment. Worst disease to have

betting on the Atlanta Falcons every single

week and expecting a different result. That's pretty bad.

Also, having big nipples is a terrible one.

And also faking how

you're looking in a picture and then saying, wow, it was so bad

even though you did it on purpose

I would be the first person in history to fake half of a double chin

Yes you should admit it

Alright we'll see you every Monday

Love you guys We'll be right back. Days of my face are falling Shuck my own love I've got a full level of pain Take me Take me Take me Take me Take me Take me Thank you.
We'll be right back. I'm so happy.
It's the same. I'm all the same.

I'm so happy.

I'm so happy. I'm so happy.

I'm so happy.

I'm so happy.

I'm so happy.

I'm so happy.

I'm so happy.

I'm so happy.

I'm so happy.

I'm so happy. I'm so happy.
I'm here.

I'm here.

I'm here. I'm here.

I'm out. We'll be right back.
Take on me. It's Pardon My Take presented by Barstool Sports.
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