Jerry Ferrara (Turtle From Entourage), Hard Knocks Finale, And Guys On Chicks

1h 34m

Hard Knocks season finale and the season was saved by Gruden. Luke Willson did us a sold even while getting cut. Zeke Watch and Jared Goff got paid. (2:35-17:33) Hot Seat/Cool Throne. (17:34-28:50) Jerry Ferrara aka Turtle from Entourage joins the show to talk about Entourage, New York sports fandom, e-gaming, and his pick up game. (31:41-1:09:04) Segments include Power Rankings of Pete Prisco's shitty power rankings, (1:14:32-1:20:21) Federer lost, Mike Wilbon name drop, (1:20:22-1:21:38) Thoughts and Prayers Chris Jericho,(1:21:39-1:23:45) and Guys on Chicks, is it ok to lock the door on your significant other while showering.(1:23:46-1:32:12) 


You can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/pardon-my-take

Press play and read along

Runtime: 1h 34m

Transcript

Speaker 1 Hey, pardon my take listeners. You can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube.
Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music.

Speaker 2 Mint is still premium unlimited wireless for a great price.

Speaker 1 So that means a half day.

Speaker 2 Yeah? Give it a try at mintmobile.com/slash switch.

Speaker 4 Up from payment of $45 for three-month plan, equivalent to $15 per month required. New customer offer for first three months only.
Speed slow under 35 gigabytes of networks busy. Taxes and fees extra.

Speaker 1 See Mintmobile.com. On today's part in my take, we have Jerry Ferrara, Turtle.
Turtle from Entourage. Entourage.

Speaker 1 Who doesn't love Entourage? So we have Turtle on from Entourage, and we also have Hard Knocks recap. We have the season finale of Hard Knocks.
We're going to give it the final score on the ball scale.

Speaker 1 Hot seat, cool throne, Zeke watch. We're going to do some power rankings and guys on chicks.
A nice, quick, tight show before football really starts on Thursday. But wait, but Gad football's back.

Speaker 1 Not yet. No, I won't start.
That'll be on Friday's show. And then on Monday's show again.

Speaker 1 Hey, it's PFT here, reminding you that Boarshead makes game day entertaining elevated and effortless.

Speaker 1 Whether you order catering platters ahead from your local Boarshead retailer, or you create your own spread at home with Boarshead premium deli meats and cheeses, you are sure to impress your guests.

Speaker 1 My favorites like oven gold turkey or blazing buffalo-style chicken, paired with their classic Vermont cheddar or creamy Munster cheese, are sure to score big and help me elevate my entertainment every time, whether it's for a tailgate or a home gating celebration.

Speaker 1 Seriously, guys, it's a game-changing flavor for every gathering. Boarshead, committed to craft since 1905.

Speaker 1 Okay, let's go!

Speaker 1 No paper, hang out or washing,

Speaker 1 and then I can't name all on the sun. Oh no, we're gonna rock it down to Elite Track Avenue

Speaker 1 and then we'll take it higher.

Speaker 1 Oh, we're gonna rock it down to Elena. It's part of my tape.
Presented by Bar. Take it higher.

Speaker 1 Welcome to Part of My Take presented by the Cash App. Go download it right now.
Use code Barstool. You get $5 for free, $5 to ASPCA.
Win-win, save some animals. Today is Wednesday, September 4th.

Speaker 1 And Luke Wilson is a hero. It was great to see him on the show.
It was tough to see him get cut. We kind of had an understanding that he was probably, the math didn't work out.

Speaker 1 He texted us after the show and was like, yeah, I'm probably going to get cut. You got to change the math.
Make sure you get those shirts here fast.

Speaker 1 Good news is he's getting a tryout with the Saints and we overnighted the shirts to him. So got a little product placement on hard knocks.
Best looking cut player of all time? I'd say so, yeah. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Out of all the ones, him and well, much better than Chad Johnson when he got cut.

Speaker 1 That was a mess on hard knocks. So we had the hard knocks season finale.
We will get to a final score.

Speaker 1 Oh, by the way, Luke Wilson also shout out to Go Out Calling Tails and and winning in the coin toss in Seattle. Tails never fails.
Never fails. Way to fucking go just.
Because it rhymes.

Speaker 1 Also, he had probably the quote of all hard knocks this year. It is what it is.
It's not what it's not. It's not what it's not.

Speaker 1 So we had basically this, the season finale of hard knocks was an encapsulation of the whole season where it was very boring, except for John Gruden. Gruden was awesome.
John Gruden giving the,

Speaker 1 like quizzing everyone where Danny Woodhead went to college, talking about dirty eyes in the backfield. Got to have clean eyes eyes back there.

Speaker 1 I don't want these Bob Costas pig guys, go east, butt cheek guys

Speaker 1 here. Olivier Vernon, he said that he's so good he eats glass and nails for breakfast.
And just basically John Gruden being John Gruden.

Speaker 1 The best part by far was when John Gruden started getting involved in the quarterback drills to make sure that they were scrambling. So he lined up as like a defensive tackle, like a three technique.

Speaker 1 And he was just running at him, screaming letters. And the way that John Gruden runs is so fucking funny.
He runs like he doesn't move his arms.

Speaker 1 He looks like a penguin in Antarctica when a scientist gets too close to his eggs. He just charges directly at him.
It was so awesome.

Speaker 1 And squealing and like making little funny grunt noises that were just so perfect. It was John Gruden at his absolute happiest.
He probably won't be that happy for a long time, but I agree.

Speaker 1 If the NFL wants to combat any upstart leagues, just have a stream of John Gruden chasing quarterbacks. It was hours upon hours.
I would watch that over most sports.

Speaker 1 Honestly, I would listen to John Gruden just calling players by their numbers for about 30 minutes non-stop. Look at 33 there.
Peterman's hurt. It's sick.
He's so mad. Look at 45.

Speaker 1 45, well, he'll put his head on your ribbon. 30 guys.
That's as close as a real football guy like John Gruden will ever get to stats or sabermetrics is just saying the numbers of a player's journey.

Speaker 1 And counting back from three. Oh, yeah, he's really good at that.

Speaker 2 And Antonio Brown got the hard knocks bump. Yes, he looks like he's all the way back and it's going to be unstoppable.

Speaker 1 Jumping out of a pool. The best way to get back for football training is to jump inside of a pool.
He had a stationary bike that was like bolted down to the bottom of his pool that he could work out.

Speaker 1 There's something about, I think it's because the regular population, 99.9% of us, use pools to relax in and hang out in and pee in.

Speaker 1 And then when athletes get in them and train, you're like, that is so badass. It's like they're training on the moon.

Speaker 1 That's actually a great point because you look at some of the all-time Instagram workout warriors. James Harrison, on a beach volleyball court, he's throwing medicine balls around.
Dude.

Speaker 1 On a massage table, he's getting 200 needles jammed into his back for acupuncture. Yeah,

Speaker 1 they take our culture of being lazy and they turn it into a gym. Right.
Lifting couches and throwing them around the yard.

Speaker 1 And Antonio Brown, like, if all he needed to do is jump out of the pool, and I would have been like, this guy's the greatest wide receiver of all time. Yeah.

Speaker 1 And, I mean, when John Gruden got really into Metallica playing in the morning, like that, he doesn't need a cup of coffee. He just needs a song from the black album to come on.

Speaker 1 and he's good to go for the entire day.

Speaker 1 And it's actually kind of funny because when they were riding into work, they were listening to the radio, and to me, it feels almost like Metallica is too modern of a band for a football coach to go to.

Speaker 1 They're usually stuck like 30 years. Whatever the coach that hired them the first time to be an assistant, whatever that guy listened to is usually what

Speaker 1 the NFL coaches.

Speaker 1 Exactly, yeah. Dan Campbell definitely watched that scene and wept quietly, wherever he is right now.
He's like, that's what I'm talking about. That is my God.

Speaker 1 We finished the season perfectly, though, with a look forward and Mark Davis standing awkwardly in his dead father's office that nothing has changed, including the whiteboard.

Speaker 1 The whiteboard, Al Davis's keys to, I think it was the drafting or putting together a football team. A fast wide receiver.
No, here we go. Ready? This is what it said.
One power. Okay.
Two big people.

Speaker 1 Okay. Three.

Speaker 1 Is this just not people he wants to fuck? No, this is how you make a winning football team. Three, pass pro,

Speaker 1 four,

Speaker 1 defense. So four, defense all the way to fourth.
Five, play calling. Six, a quarterback that can hit the uprights from 50 yards out on his knees.

Speaker 1 Seven, spending the last 10 years looking like a walking member of Tales from the Crypt and scaring everyone in every press conference. Eight, doing cocaine all night with Hunter S.

Speaker 1 Thompson and eating meatloaf all day with John Madden. Nine, birthing a a fail son who wears white sunglasses and tucks in his shirt and has an awesome haircut.
I cleaned it up at the end.

Speaker 1 Awesome haircut. Awesome haircut, yeah.
And great taste in Vance. And great taste in Vance.
So, yeah, the Las Vegas Raiders are coming. I get so excited when I see the construction of a new stadium.

Speaker 1 I don't know what it is, but those steel beams, it's just like, fuck, this is going to be sick. Dude, the time is.
And that's going to look exactly like every other stadium.

Speaker 1 Yeah, the time-lapse porn on that is incredible. Every time, who is it? Is it Andrew Zeciliano or is it Rich Eisen? One of those guys, whenever they fly into L.A., they fly right over the new L.A.

Speaker 1 stadium and they take a picture of it every single time.

Speaker 1 I never, like, I will never look at another man's picture out of his own plane window. That's just guy code.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 But when there's a stadium being built on the ground, I can't help but stop every time. Yes, it's fantastic to watch.
So finale hard knocks, balls. I'm giving it 2.8 balls on a five-ball system.

Speaker 1 I'd say two and a half.

Speaker 1 It wasn't very good. It wasn't that great.
I was screwed and saved it. I would have liked a little Mike Mayok.
Yeah. Sitting there with some of his Mayokisms.

Speaker 1 Mike Mayok refused to be on camera, basically.

Speaker 1 You notice that usually in hard knocks, we get the awkward conversation where it's like, hey, man, you did great things for us.

Speaker 1 If you need me to back you up, I will call every team and get you another job. And then the guy leaves and the general manager is like, who is that again?

Speaker 1 We didn't get that weird

Speaker 1 conversation.

Speaker 1 What I missed most about that is the standard issue general manager cargo shorts that they give to everybody in the league.

Speaker 1 I remember Tanbaum on the Jets had probably the best pair of cargo shorts that he would wear every single day. And they act so sad and they're like, you have a seat.

Speaker 1 Like, man, this was the hardest thing ever. It's like, no, dude, that was cut number, that was the 84th guy on the roster.
He didn't even sniff the team.

Speaker 1 Yeah, and then they're always like, and if any other team needs a recommendation, we'll give you a catch one. We got you.
Despite the fact that we just cut you immediately.

Speaker 1 We have no tape of you, and we actually, we didn't even know you were here. You literally didn't make the Raiders.

Speaker 1 So if the Patriots want to give you a sniff, we'll be sure to give them a high recommendation. Sure, sure.

Speaker 1 Yeah, it's tough because I don't want to talk about another man's job because there are some players that got cut that I think

Speaker 1 Brandon Marshall will play this year. I'm pretty sure Luke Wilson will play this year.
Definitely will. Definitely will play this.
Shout out the Saints. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Put a good word. That's right.
We'll give our guy down there a call about him. But yeah, it's...
It was definitely missing a little je sequa. Yeah.
Hank,

Speaker 1 I would give it like three and a half balls.

Speaker 2 The Luke Wilson montage with the music and him wearing the shirt walking out, like that was a tier 30.

Speaker 1 That was enough to get you. It was gut-wrenching, yeah.
Yeah, it was

Speaker 1 good in like a remix. They had that.

Speaker 2 I like the hip-hop remix of the old NFL songs.

Speaker 1 That was good.

Speaker 1 She just played that the whole time.

Speaker 2 And the Antonio Brown montage, I was like, oh my God, like he's going to be dominant.

Speaker 1 Don't change our opinion. I thought it was pretty good.
All right, so it lands like somewhere around three-ish balls. Yeah, around three.

Speaker 1 How many balls for the season?

Speaker 1 That's what we're saying. Oh, not just today's show, the whole season.
I gave it 2.8.

Speaker 1 Oh, I got 3.5. 3.5, 4.
Okay, so yeah, we landed somewhere around 3 because PFT went two and a half. So that's the ball system.

Speaker 1 I just needed, here's what I needed: I needed some Mike Mayock, and the fact that they gave me about 10 minutes of a Grooden son that was not Deuce Gruden really pissed me off. And more Mark Davis.

Speaker 1 Mark Davis puts asses in the seats. That's a fact.
Yeah. Yeah.
That's true. It's one way or the other.
Whether you're repulsed or enthralled,

Speaker 1 you will

Speaker 1 show up to

Speaker 1 his ass on a seat. Standing in an office.
Just Mark Davis in a pair of white pants. Yeah, and he tucks in.
He does the thing where he tucks in his

Speaker 1 quick way to figure out if a guy's a total weirdo in head case. They tuck their thumbs into their jean pockets.
Yeah. That's like, look at it.

Speaker 1 If you're watching on barsnowgold.com slash PMT, sign up right now. This?

Speaker 1 Like standing like this.

Speaker 1 That's a fucking weird thing to do. That's pretty strange.

Speaker 1 Also, the guy that has,

Speaker 1 if we're going thumbs, the guy with the thumb hole cut out, that he makes himself of his own sleeve. Yeah.
That's always kind of a weird move. All right, so that was hard knocks.

Speaker 1 We have, before we get to hot seat, cool throne, little Zeke watch. Zeke watch was on full effect in Dallas today.
They had the people at the airport. They had a chopper following the car.
Zeke.

Speaker 1 It seems like they're about to sign him. It seems like Jerry Jones is about to be like, hey, Zeke, I'll give you $10 million under the table if you just sign.

Speaker 1 I feel like, is this crazy to say, but anytime a guy, like, he's going to play on Sunday. Yeah, I'm pretty sure he will.
Melvin Gordon, I don't think, is going to unless they trade him.

Speaker 1 And, like, I don't root for injuries, but I always would find it funny if Zeke signed for a shitload of money and then even faked an injury.

Speaker 1 Fuck you guys. I'm sure he wouldn't be completely heartbroken if he got a brand new contract and then broke his foot.
Yeah, he'd probably be okay for that long term.

Speaker 1 Yeah, so the Cowboys seem to to be going with a strategy where they've signed Jalen Smith. They signed Lael Collins earlier.
They signed Demarcus Lawrence this offseason to a very long contract.

Speaker 1 Zach Martin is, he had a huge extension. I think what Jerry Jones is doing by putting together all these extensions right now as the triplets are still waiting for theirs is

Speaker 1 he's doing the old, we got free donuts in the break room email. Right.
And so the last person to get in there is going to miss out on all the donuts.

Speaker 1 And so Ezekiel Elliott saw all these contracts coming in. He's like, I got to get get my ass out of Cabo and get into the break room until they eat the last bear claw.

Speaker 1 I also think Jerry Jones, one, the cap's going to go up. And I think Jerry Jones has enough power that he can actually just make the cap go up.

Speaker 1 Like he could go to the owner's meeting and be like, hey guys, cap's going up because I need to sign everyone.

Speaker 1 Two, Jerry Jones, is Jerry Jones being so smart that he sees the future of football and it's going to actually just be seven on seven? And so he's like, if I only pay nine guys, I'll be fine.

Speaker 1 It's a very fine line between Jerry Jones being too smart and being too drunk. I don't know which

Speaker 1 side of the line he's on at this given moment. They're going to pay nine guys like 90% of the cap.
I think he's just hoping that nobody has the balls to call him out on a salary cap violation.

Speaker 1 Yes, slash, he's just going to pay everyone under the table. He can just be like, you're doing some fuzzy math there.
Someone get Jerry Jones' Bitcoin account. Oh, yeah.

Speaker 1 Well, yeah, that'll take a long time to explain to Jerry Jones with the Bitcoin situation.

Speaker 1 And then the other news, speaking of money and contracts, Jared Goff, our guy, Jared Goff, got paid. So shout out Jared Goff.
We all have Cash App. Why don't you spread the wealth, dude?

Speaker 1 Yeah, was it $110 million?

Speaker 1 I'm not trying to wallet peep on Jared Goff, but. And I'm not even trying to ask for a lot.

Speaker 1 I'm just asking for us. Like one game check, $75,000 each.

Speaker 2 $1 million off the truck is nothing.

Speaker 1 It's trucking. Don't even notice it.

Speaker 1 I'm still marking that for a full delivery. You own your house, Jared.
You're fine.

Speaker 1 But you've already paid that thing off. You could make the argument that maybe he would have only gotten $107 million guaranteed if we weren't always telling Sean McVay what a good quarterback.

Speaker 2 What if he said, I'll give you guys that money and a house, but we have to move to L.A.

Speaker 1 You can't go in the water.

Speaker 1 Deal. That deal is still on the table.

Speaker 1 If you want to move to L.A. tomorrow, but you can never go into any water at all, we can do it.

Speaker 1 Hank just did the Twitter question of, fellas, which would you rather have, a million dollars in a hot tub or get run over by a truck? Yeah.

Speaker 1 Tough question. Hmm.
Would I rather get a free house in Southern California

Speaker 1 or not have a free house?

Speaker 1 Was that the question? Win the lottery, you have to fuck your mom. Go.

Speaker 1 Tough call. Life's full of important choices.
Damn, I'll go lottery. Yeah.
Yeah, I think I'm going to go lottery. But either way, Jared, your favorite podcast.
I'm not saying, but.

Speaker 1 Or, I mean, we could just give him some ideas that he could invest in, as opposed to just being like, give us money.

Speaker 1 Or here's where we should go. Follow along here, guys.
What if we did like a corporate?

Speaker 1 You know, like when you go to a Final Four or Super Bowl, the Eagles, which I already mentioned in this podcast, that's two for the Eagles, they'll do a corporate show for like Chase, and it will be 300 people in a private place, and they'll play a whole set.

Speaker 1 Jared, for $1 million, we will do a private pardon my take for you. Yeah.
Done. And we'll perform

Speaker 1 Drink Paint. Done.
Live in your backyard. How about that? How much money did you send? And an acoustic version of version of chalk.
$1 million. Cash.
An acoustic version of chalk.

Speaker 1 And you can't tell anyone that you gave us the cash because I don't want to pay the taxes. No, it's all under the table, Jerry Jones sell.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 I mean, or if you wanted to invest in our ideas, you live in LA, you could get boner dogs off the ground. How much money do you think Jared? You could invest in the Tumball franchise.
Yeah. You could,

Speaker 1 here's an app that you can invest in. I just invented Uber, but for firefighters.
So if you see a brush fire,

Speaker 1 just hit a button and somebody shows up

Speaker 1 and pisses on it. Yeah, we'll show up.
How much money do you think Jared Goff could give us before his account was like, I don't think so, man.

Speaker 1 Because that's really what it comes down to, right? It's like five to ten million. I don't know if it's that, but it's definitely

Speaker 1 $100,000 each, right? Like, I'm trying to get the bar low here.

Speaker 1 No accountant is like, hey, Jared,

Speaker 1 what's that $300,000? You're not going to preach out of the deal. Hold on, dude.
Hold on. You don't want $100,000 cash? Yeah, but you start high.

Speaker 1 We already started high. Now we're going, now we're settling.

Speaker 1 We'll just settle for that. $100,000 cash.
That's fine. That's fine.
How hilarious would it be, seriously, if we woke up tomorrow, haha, and

Speaker 3 all three of us had $100,000?

Speaker 1 That would be such a good prank, Jared. Oh, God.

Speaker 1 Oh, man.

Speaker 1 You get us so fast. You're good, dude.
You're so funny.

Speaker 1 All right, let's do hot seat cool throw and get the turtle.

Speaker 1 Hank.

Speaker 2 My hot seat is the Mets. Wait, real quick.

Speaker 1 He has to get a better Tesla than Blake, right? That's got to be his next move. Like, the one step up from what Blake has.
Yes, he does. He does.
Hot seat Mets.

Speaker 2 They are basically their season's over. They went a seven-run lead in the ninth.

Speaker 2 Seven runs, including a 3-1 walk-off home run to Nationals.

Speaker 1 To who?

Speaker 2 The Nationals.

Speaker 1 Is Natitude back? I think so. I feel like this is...

Speaker 2 This was rocking all the 20 people that were there.

Speaker 1 I've watched three Nats games in the last three and a half weeks. There you go.
And now I'm about to start watching. I think Natitude's back, guys.

Speaker 1 The Mets, it might be because of who we work with and everything.

Speaker 2 I've been rooting for the Mets because obviously the Red Sox are out of it.

Speaker 2 I hate the Yankees, and I'm in New York, and so they're always on TV, and it's like, oh, like, if the Mets are good, it'd be fun to watch, and they just cannot seem to put it together.

Speaker 1 So now it's clearly over. Yeah, but my my timeline, there's something about the Mets losing.
The meltdowns are so. I mean, Frank the Tank was

Speaker 1 something. I thought he was going to be a little bit more.

Speaker 1 Kevin always melted down like Clem, all these guys, and it's probably just because I know them so well, but their meltdowns are just, they're on a different level. Mets meltdowns.

Speaker 1 They always know it's coming, too. Yes, they always know it's coming.
You know what I think is part of it is Mr. Met, just the mascot, the big, goofy baseball.

Speaker 1 The boss is Met with the giant smile that's always on his face. Yeah.
Like, seeing that guy upset over a heartbreaking loss is classic comic. Somebody gave the finger last year.

Speaker 1 All-time mascot moment. Yeah, that was pretty great.
All right. What's your cool throne?

Speaker 2 My cool throne is eating ass.

Speaker 1 Oh. Oh, good.
Go on. We're back.

Speaker 2 Flume, one of your guys' favorite artists, I'm sure.

Speaker 2 He was doing a concert.

Speaker 1 He's kind of got a potty mouth, huh?

Speaker 2 No, he was doing a concert, and someone had a sign in the crowd, and it just said, Flume doesn't eat ass.

Speaker 2 And he brought his girlfriend on stage, and made her start eating ass.

Speaker 1 He did? Yeah. He started eating her ass.

Speaker 1 Fuck yeah, dude. Way to go, Flume.
She's ride or die. That's awesome.
Literally. Yeah, because that's like one of those things that

Speaker 1 if you have no

Speaker 1 like heads up that you're going to eat ass,

Speaker 1 you can trick the ass.

Speaker 2 Imagine getting that triggered by an ass eating sign.

Speaker 1 Imagine if she was just sitting there swamp ass on the side. No dude wipes.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Imagine she was like, oh, thank God Flume is on stage so I can sit here and fart.
Uh-huh.

Speaker 1 Yeah, that's

Speaker 1 a risk. Good for her, good for him.

Speaker 1 who says true love is dead? Yeah. How old is Flume?

Speaker 2 Who knows?

Speaker 1 You know, Levitate,

Speaker 2 Insane, Hyper Real.

Speaker 1 Yeah, of course. You know these songs? Wall Fuck.
All the classics. Wall Fuck.
Yeah. I had my first kiss to Wall Fuck.
Australian record producer, Flume. Oh,

Speaker 1 okay, that loses a little bit of the coolness because in Australia, you eat ass like you're shaking hands.

Speaker 1 That's like a classic hello.

Speaker 1 All right, what do you got, PFT? Whoa, whoa, whoa. Thanks, not Dog.
Whoa, whoa, sorry.

Speaker 1 Sorry, we're doing a tight show. No.
No. What do you mean? You got as many cool throws as you want.

Speaker 2 My other one is people looking to invest.

Speaker 1 So I'm sure we know

Speaker 2 a lot of young entrepreneurial listeners maybe have a little bit of extra cash. They want to make that money work for them.
Larry shirts and stocks are now back on sale as of today.

Speaker 1 Okay, so if you are a first-time listener around this time of the season, Larry is our goldfish.

Speaker 2 Larry Six. Larry Six.

Speaker 1 Don't ask what happened to the first five.

Speaker 2 Need Larry Six t-shirts.

Speaker 1 Oh, yo, grab them. Grab them.
So we have Larry's shirts. So Larry enters into the Las Vegas Super Contest every year.
We have entered.

Speaker 1 Yeah, what is the Las Vegas Super Contest? It's a contest of all the best gamblers in the world, and Larry is one of them.

Speaker 2 It costs a lot of money to enter.

Speaker 1 A lot of money to enter. I tweeted out the card, so he's officially entered.
He's going to pick five games every single week.

Speaker 1 And if you buy a t-shirt, a Larry t-shirt, you will get stock in owning Larry. It comes with a certificate.
Yeah, and in 2016, he finished 50th just outside the money.

Speaker 1 If he finishes in the money, we will divvy up the money with everyone who owns the stock after processing fees for us.

Speaker 2 And it's up to what? $2 million if you win the whole thing? Something like that.

Speaker 1 Remember the process. But yeah, but $2 million.
You can take whatever it is. It's like owning a racehorse, essentially.

Speaker 1 You get to frame your stock, put it on your wall, and you have made an active investment. As a matter of fact, if you are a

Speaker 1 if maybe you just came into some money and you're looking to make a great investment, then why not just buy like a million dollars worth of stock in goldfish? Yeah, Larry, yeah, pump and dump. Yeah.

Speaker 2 What other stocks come with a free t-shirt, too?

Speaker 1 I can't. Microsoft.
Really? So they send you a polo.

Speaker 1 Well, it's a t-shirt, though. Like a nice golf.
This is a polo. It's pretty nice.

Speaker 1 Probably Fire.

Speaker 1 Was that Billy McFarland's company? Fanatics.

Speaker 1 Yeah. They might.
I mean, they're a t-shirt company.

Speaker 2 You don't know this, though. We don't know.

Speaker 1 No, I don't. I made up Microsoft.
What are stonks? None. none.
What are stocks? Because I've seen the stonk meme. We should just put the stock meme with the farm.
Stonks are on the rise.

Speaker 1 Yeah, so you'll actually get a free stock with Larry.

Speaker 1 And stonks are going through the roof right now. No, but seriously, buy it because it's fun to root along with Larry's picks.
And he was 60% in 2016.

Speaker 1 And you can say that you own a goldfish, a gambling goldfish that will do better than thousands of people in the Las Vegas Supercon, including us, probably.

Speaker 1 Well, we're not in it, but yeah. He makes five picks a week.
Yeah. So you'll follow along with Larry.
All right, so go buy a parsley sports store. PFT.
We're done, Hank. Yes, sir.

Speaker 1 Okay, my hot seat is the New England Patriots. Oh, uh-oh.
Yeah, New England Patriots on the hot seat because Mike Tomlin gave a press conference today, and Mike Tomlin is back.

Speaker 1 He's had an entire offseason to just.

Speaker 1 I assume all he's been doing is reading like Ralph Waldo Emerson and doing Dizzy Bat Races simultaneously because of how cryptic his Mike Tomlinisms have been today during his press conference.

Speaker 1 I'm going to read you all three of them.

Speaker 1 The first one was, if you have red paint, you paint your barn red.

Speaker 1 Yes.

Speaker 1 Fact. Football guy quote.
Makes sense. Facts.

Speaker 1 It's true. This is what he said.

Speaker 1 This is what he said about the Patriots' atmosphere. Cooks like to be in the kitchen.

Speaker 1 Okay. And then the last one was, a nose guard is like blockbuster video.
You better diversify. Also, fact.
Rooney rule. There's only one blockbuster left in the U.S.

Speaker 1 And you can't diversify if there's just one store.

Speaker 1 There is one, though. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Where is it? In Washington or something. I saw it.
It was kind of cool. I need to go to it.
Yeah. The bottom line is Mike Tomlin.
He talks like, what's the guy from Dirty Jobs?

Speaker 1 He talks like Mike Rowe from Dirty Jobs. If you translated his quotes into German and then took the German translation and translated them back into English.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 That's basically how you get a Mike Tomlin quote about doing something that you don't want to do. He's in peak performance.
He's in season form.

Speaker 2 And you think that means it's going to translate to the field?

Speaker 1 I think if I were the Patriots, I would be very careful around Mike Tomlin's. Or would you say that?

Speaker 1 Honestly, it sounds like he's gotten insane.

Speaker 1 Let me ask you a question, Hank. That's a bad thing.
What do you think you should

Speaker 1 use with your red paint? Is that what it was? Yeah, Hank, if you had red paint

Speaker 1 in a barn, what would you do with it? I'd paint it red. Yeah, there you go.
So it sounds like you're

Speaker 1 Tomlin's stand. Yeah, it took you a second, but you got it.

Speaker 1 Okay, your cool throne.

Speaker 1 My cool throne is Dan Snyder.

Speaker 1 So not only is an attitude back, which is great for the District of Champions, D.C.,

Speaker 1 Dan Snyder is in great form because the Washington Post just did a long article about the 20 years of glory since Snyder has bought the team, in which they have, I believe, three playoff wins and eight head coaches.

Speaker 1 And they got a quote. They tried to find some people to give good quotes, positive quotes, about Snyder's tenure, and they found one.
Do you know who they had that had positive things to say?

Speaker 1 Dan Snyder. Well, probably if he had interviewed and he wasn't such a fucking recluse, but it was Stephen Jones from the Cowboys.
Nice. So the Cowboys ownership thinks that the Redskins ownership, R.

Speaker 1 Words' ownership, is doing a great job. They said, I've got nothing but respect for Dan and what he can get done there in Washington.
He is a visionary. That's perfect.
So, yeah.

Speaker 1 Your rival, your chief rival is saying you're doing a great job. That's actually the best compliment that you've ever given the R Words to say that the Cowboys are still their rival.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 That honestly makes me feel better as a fan. I mean, they technically are, just, you know, historically and all that shit.
Talking them up is like,

Speaker 1 you'll appreciate this, Hank.

Speaker 1 Like, when Bill Belichick has to find something nice to say about an opponent, even when he knows that they're vastly superior, and he, like, I don't know, he finds something.

Speaker 1 Finds their like line, their backup linebacker. He's like, he's got good tape.
Ori says, like, Andy Dalton, you got to appreciate this guy's effort on tackling when he throws an interception. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Love it. Facts.

Speaker 2 That new, also cool thrown is just

Speaker 2 Bill Belichick football porn.

Speaker 1 Yeah, that Sabin Belichick documentary looks pretty fucking sick. It does.
All right, my hot seat is conversion therapy. I don't know if you guys saw this.
You hear about this? Do you see this?

Speaker 1 The founder of the nation's biggest conversion therapy for homosexuals came out as gay. Oh, never saw that coming.
You think? Never saw that plot twist coming.

Speaker 1 Yep, that's spent years and years trying to tell people that they shouldn't be gay. And then after years and years of pseudos, no, just fake science and trying to convert people.

Speaker 1 He's like, oh, actually. Well, he was using real science to commit fake science, which is like electrocuting people into thinking they're straight.
You're done. Conversion therapy canceled.
Okay.

Speaker 1 It already was, but now it's like really canceled.

Speaker 2 There's got to be some unreal like Facebook comment posts about people

Speaker 2 who converted and then are now upset. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Uh-huh. That's, yeah, that's that.
Facebook is popping on this. Somebody that's converted that's just been biting the inside of their cheek bloody for the last 20 years.
This fucking guy.

Speaker 1 Never saw this one coming. And then my cool throne is

Speaker 1 me and you guys. I don't know if you guys looked at the NFL week one schedule.
I did. I like every single game.
I peaked. I'm going to be on fire on Sunday.
I'm pretty confident.

Speaker 1 I'm going to bet every game and I'm going to win every game. We'll get

Speaker 1 into our picks on Friday. Knock if you're with me.
But yeah, knock on wood. Yeah.
Chad Battle State. Dude, I looked at it.
I was like, winner, winner, winner. Just went down.

Speaker 1 And I was doing everything. I was doing overs, unders, dogs, favorites.
I see the board so clearly, there is no way this is going to blow up in my face.

Speaker 1 It does look like the most easy week change of all time, doesn't it?

Speaker 1 It's like a little bit dangerous. Falcons plus four against the Vikings.
Every underdog. Oh, give it to me.
You like the Jags? Plus three and a half? I do. I love them.

Speaker 1 I had plus three and a half at home. This is going to be easy.

Speaker 1 Every jackass out there is going to be betting on the Chiefs. Not me.
I'm going to take the Jags and win because I'm smart. Yeah, so

Speaker 1 this is not going to come back and bite us. We got this.
So week one coming up, we're going to do all our picks on Friday. You talked me into a money line parlay.
Once

Speaker 1 you're worried, my big idea: once the word money line parlay comes across my desk, I have to explore. I got to sniff around a little bit.
How does this lose?

Speaker 1 The Philadelphia Eagles at home against the Arwords. Win.
Well, Seahawks at home against the Bengals, the Ravens in Miami.

Speaker 1 All the money line parlay, even money. How does that lose? FitzMagic is the only one.
No way.

Speaker 1 No way. Okay.
50 is currently. No way.
Fitzmagic.

Speaker 1 That cannot lose. It cannot lose.
And it's a bunch of guys like, oh, the team's given up. No.
We've given up on the team. Like, no.
There's still 53 guys on this roster. Cannot lose.

Speaker 1 There's backs against them. Yeah.
Yeah. I am sorry.
Brian Flores is pissing off his team so much that they want to stick it to him by winning.

Speaker 1 I'm going to put all $100,000 that Jared Goff gives us overnight as a joke on that parlay.

Speaker 1 Speak for yourself because my money line parlay is going to be the Eagles, the Seahawks, the Chargers, and and the Saints. Ooh, I can't believe it.

Speaker 1 Here's the thing. You can't go wrong.

Speaker 1 You really can never truly lose a money line parlay on all the favorites. Just never happened.

Speaker 5 Aldi is now on Uber Eats. So whether your fridge is empty and you're too tired to shop, or you just ran out of essential ingredients, don't worry, we got you.

Speaker 5 Get 40% off your first Aldi order on Uber Eats with code new Aldi25. Orders $30 or more, save up to $25, and it's 1231.
See out for details.

Speaker 1 What's up, guys? It's Big Cat here making my Irish entrance with proper number 12 Irish whiskey. How do you make an Irish entrance, you ask?

Speaker 1 It starts with a shot of proper number 12 Irish whiskey because real friends don't let friends Irish exit a party without a story to tell.

Speaker 1 Original proper number 12 is rich in a smooth blend of golden grain and single malt. Age four years in bourbon barrels.
Mix it up with some ginger ale for a classic and refreshing proper ginger.

Speaker 1 In the mood for something smooth but a little sweeter, try proper Irish apple, a delicious blend of proper's award-winning Irish whiskey with crisp, fresh notes of apple.

Speaker 1 So get out there and make your Irish entrance. Anything else just wouldn't be proper.
Okay, here he is, Jerry Ferrara, a.k.a. Turtle.

Speaker 1 Okay, we now welcome on a very special guest. It is Jerry Ferrara.
Do we introduce you as Turtle or is that past?

Speaker 3 I mean, it's a judgment call on your part.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I don't know.

Speaker 3 I'm fine with it. If you think it's appropriate, then let's go with it.

Speaker 1 Good cop, bad cop. I can call you Turtle, and he can call you Jerry.
Well, this is the way it is. You don't call him Turtle.

Speaker 1 Now you guys fight. You used to have a podcast.
I mean, you know the media world.

Speaker 1 Like, what I just did right there, it was actually genius because I introduced you as Turtle, but I made it seem like I was asking.

Speaker 3 Of course. No, I saw everything that you just did there, and this is why you are who you are.

Speaker 1 Yeah, so you actually are here promoting...

Speaker 1 power on stars. Yes.
So I was told that I need to ask what the hell get the strap means.

Speaker 3 You've never heard of that?

Speaker 1 I've heard it. I'm going to shoot you.
I don't know what it is. As a gun owner, I know it means get the strap.

Speaker 3 That was a reference to at one point 50 on his Instagram was

Speaker 3 50 Cent would post some

Speaker 3 stuff that would that would actually be like the response like oh this hat like this guy fell and got into a street fight like get the strap and it became a thing it became a popular hashtag I like it uh before we jump into all the career stuff and all that I I want to kind of thank you because you started Fat Styles, right?

Speaker 1 Yes,

Speaker 3 I was a part of that.

Speaker 1 That is the ultimate hangover sandwich.

Speaker 1 Every time I used to drive by there, you had one in Austin.

Speaker 1 Austin, Texas, that's right.

Speaker 1 And I'd be hungover as hell, and I'd drive past. I don't know what the rules are for what you're allowed to put in a sandwich.

Speaker 1 It's like if you gave Guy Fiori the Infinity Gauntlet and just said, like, load this shit up. But is there any ingredient, any appetizer ingredient you've never put on a sandwich there?

Speaker 3 I think it's covered everything pretty much. I'm sure in the beginning that was the goal.
It was supposed to be outrageous, kind of. Can you even, has anyone ever done that sort of thing?

Speaker 1 Buffalo wings and mozzarella sticks on a sandwich. Pretty much, yeah.
Best way to wash away a hangover. Exactly.
It's a little free ad there. Throw it all in there.
Appreciate it.

Speaker 1 All right, I'm going to do the hardest question, though, first. Oh, boy, okay.
Daniel Jones or Eli Manning?

Speaker 1 You are diehard Knicks, Giants, Yankees fans. I mean, Eli won two Super Bowls.

Speaker 3 You put me in the hot seat already. Okay, so I'm going to say Eli, and I'm sure there's going to be Giant fans listening.
We're going to go, really, dude?

Speaker 3 I think you roll him out there and give a shot. Two reasons.
One, I do think after the way he was benched two years ago, I think he deserves a shot.

Speaker 1 Oh, no, we're going from two years now. Yeah, no, no, he deserves a shot.

Speaker 1 Let him go out properly.

Speaker 3 And I also think that I don't know if you want to throw the rookie in right away.

Speaker 3 Maybe if they're one and five, then you say you give the rookie the nod, get him in there. But I want to see Eli at one last shot.

Speaker 1 I know we cannot continue to hang on to 2011 yes because now it was fun when it was like 2015 we were like four years ago yeah same team we're almost going on a decade okay so then follow-up question how many times have you sat in mr mara's suite never once actually have you met him uh no i have not interesting i have how did he get to you

Speaker 1 this is this is my own these are my own thoughts he did not get to me what about this what about you you send daniel jones to indy get like ty hilton back roll eli out there for the next five years now he's got a receiver too.

Speaker 3 Absolutely not. No, I don't.
You're going long-term Eli.

Speaker 1 That's a little bit more. I think you can build around Eli.
So you're at least willing to say that Eli, like, it's coming to an end.

Speaker 3 Look, I'm 39 years old, and I am not an athlete, but when I go play pickup basketball,

Speaker 3 my brain knows what to do. My body doesn't know what to do.
Right, right.

Speaker 3 So I can only imagine doing that at the pro level, but I do think he deserves a shot and see where he is after like five games. What's your game like in pickup basketball?

Speaker 3 Now, it's a little more Andre Miller with a good three

Speaker 3 with a really good three.

Speaker 1 So you just run like three-point line to three-point line or are you getting dirty and trying to get some rebounds?

Speaker 3 No, I don't want to get hurt anymore.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 3 I've gotten too many like seven stitches under my eye. This tooth knocked out.
I'm too small and old.

Speaker 3 I really just want to shoot threes and distribute the ball. I want to be the guy that's like, I like playing with that guy.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 Do you at least call out picks when your teammate's about to get picked?

Speaker 3 Always call out picks because when you're my size and your teammate doesn't call out a pick and you get crushed and your neck snaps back, it's unpleasant. I'd pick you to death.

Speaker 1 Yeah, if I threw a pick on you, he's a big bag. You're a fucking body bag.

Speaker 3 As long as my team's calling me out, I'm gonna go right around you.

Speaker 1 No, I don't know,

Speaker 1 man. I'm gonna go right around you.
Have you reached the point in your pickup life where you're the one that's setting unnecessary screens and just getting like waved off left and right?

Speaker 3 Yeah, I don't set screens.

Speaker 1 I know what type of screenshot.

Speaker 1 I try to set screens, but they just look at me and they're like, well, no, we don't. They wave you out.

Speaker 1 No, no, step away. I know what type of pickup guy you are.
If you're hitting your shot, I'm happy you're on my team. If you're not, I'm like, this fucking guy is not doing anything.

Speaker 3 No, that's not entirely true because I also will not shoot. If I miss my first two,

Speaker 3 I'm not shooting anymore. Okay.

Speaker 1 Then you're really doing nothing.

Speaker 3 No, I play D. I got fast feet and fast hands.
I'm in the passing lanes a lot. I'm just not looking for contact.

Speaker 1 You're a disruptor. Yeah.

Speaker 3 If there's contact involved, I am avoiding that.

Speaker 1 And I feel like I've earned that right at 39 years. You do the stuff that doesn't show up in the stat sheet, but at the end of the day,

Speaker 1 your team only loses by three or four.

Speaker 3 I love that we're breaking down my pickup.

Speaker 1 Well, I mean, it's important. It tells a lot about a person.

Speaker 3 It's important to me.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 How's Marky Mark as a pickup basketball player?

Speaker 3 Wahlberg's a really good athlete.

Speaker 1 I don't know how much he plays. Yeah, that was a very sneaky way to say he sucks at basketball.

Speaker 3 No, no, no, no. I don't know how much he plays.
I think he plays more golf than basketball nowadays, but the few times I've played with him,

Speaker 3 really, really fast lefty. So got that

Speaker 3 throwing you a different look

Speaker 3 with a lefty. So Mark's a good athlete.

Speaker 1 Okay. When you guys were doing Entourage, how hands-on was he actually actually with the creation of the show and the storylines?

Speaker 1 Was he a guy that was like inserting a little, you know, whispering in your ear, hey, maybe Vince should fuck this girl instead?

Speaker 3 In the first couple of years, Mark was very much involved.

Speaker 3 The thing with him, though, is like, obviously, he has a lot going on, a lot on his plate, so it wasn't like he could take four months off and say, hey, I'm going to come hang out on the entourage.

Speaker 3 I say he's doing like nine movies a year.

Speaker 3 But in the early years, to make sure we sort of got off to a good start, he was there a lot. And then he was kind of just always the presence.
Like, you knew

Speaker 3 if you really had an issue or something. Like, he's a very, very good producer.

Speaker 1 Did he have a turtle in his crew?

Speaker 3 Yeah, I mean, it's sort of based off of that. It's based off of that theory.
I mean, he does have a, there was an actual Johnny Drama. Okay.
His name is Johnny Drama. Really?

Speaker 3 That's a real, that comes from a real guy.

Speaker 1 He was a trainer. Entra is based on a true story.

Speaker 1 Loosely. You could say that.

Speaker 3 I mean, there's no person that it's like, oh, we're using this guy's exact life. But it was based on Wahlberg and his crew at a time where he was ascending to

Speaker 1 fame. Okay, were they in the first episode of Entourage?

Speaker 3 Yeah, so there's a scene. This is a long ass time ago.

Speaker 3 There's a scene in the pilot episode of Entourage where we're walking on the Warner Brothers lot and Wahlberg crosses us and he's with the real Johnny Dramas there, his E, his turtle.

Speaker 3 I don't know if the,

Speaker 3 because the whole who's turtle, there's been like seven guys who have claimed that their turtles based on them. Right.

Speaker 1 So I don't know actually who's such a turtle move for a bunch of people to be like, I'm turtle.

Speaker 3 But we kind of walk past each other and he talks some shit to us in the pilot. And yeah, that was his first appearance on the show.

Speaker 1 Was there ever a moment? I mean, it was one of those shows where I remember vividly watching the pilot and being like, what the hell is this? This is awesome.

Speaker 1 And was there a moment where you're like, this is a huge, huge hit? And just kind of soaking it all in? Or were you just because this also was your breakout?

Speaker 3 For sure.

Speaker 1 So it's got to be a weird feeling. Like, at what point does it become real?

Speaker 3 This is is my life now and or does it like you just kind of hop on the roller coaster and let it run so the first season was successful in the right that there was uh it got nominated for some awards but it was not a ratings blockbuster by any stretch um i think if we were actually on any other network we may have gotten canceled because the numbers were like okay right but hbo really tries to give you a chance to develop or whatever so uh it wasn't until like midway through season two because this is how long ago it's been this was like the inception of TiVo on demand.

Speaker 3 So, while people didn't watch in the moment, a year went in between seasons. They watched on that downtime.

Speaker 3 So, when we came back into season two, we had gained, I don't know how many new watchers, but all via on-demand and TiVo and stuff. So, it was weird because the numbers weren't great.

Speaker 3 But then we came into like midway through season two, I think is when we did the Vegas episode,

Speaker 3 where there's like a fight with Seth Green's character. We started having like people trying to get on the set and we're trying to watch.
It's Like, wow, there's actually people watching this thing.

Speaker 1 Yeah, when uh, when you see the HBO screen kind of fade to black after that static, do you still hear the entourage theme song?

Speaker 3 There is a little bit of it being ingrained in my brain for sure, but uh

Speaker 1 no, if anything, I'm no, I more hear other shows on the curb, yeah, exactly.

Speaker 1 Now we're talking, yeah, yeah, uh-huh. Um, so there's, was like a ton of cameos, obviously, in entourage.
Some crazy guys, some people like athletes, everywhere.

Speaker 1 What was the one guy that you were like, holy shit, this person's real starstruck, even though you are now a star yourself?

Speaker 3 I hate, this is going to really pain me to even say this.

Speaker 3 But it was really cool when Tom Brady did a good cameo.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 3 And it was just coming off 2011, so not that long.

Speaker 1 Did you talk shit to him?

Speaker 3 Well, in the episode, I do.

Speaker 1 Right, but I'm talking real life.

Speaker 3 No, because

Speaker 3 I just didn't feel like it was. Also, he was coming.
That was the year after he had just gotten hurt in game one.

Speaker 3 So he had missed that whole year, and it was the summer going into that following season. So he hadn't played football in a full, almost a full year.

Speaker 3 And he came on, and I wanted to try to find like, what's up with this guy? He can't, there's no way he's going to be like a cool guy.

Speaker 3 And not only was he a super cool guy, you can always tell like everybody, how people are, especially like the crew. He was real generous with the crew.

Speaker 3 Showed up on time, knew his lines, was good on screen. It was a golf episode.
So it was also six o'clock in the morning. Guy got up and hit like a 300-yard drive, which was super annoying.

Speaker 3 So I'm like, okay, no, he's real. This is like, it's not all,

Speaker 3 he's a good dude.

Speaker 1 So who is the worst of the crew? Name names.

Speaker 3 Honestly, I've really not seen.

Speaker 3 I know I'm not even being protective. I have not seen anyone come on.
Because when you're getting the cameos, right, like for the most part, they want to be there.

Speaker 3 There was a time early on, like season one, we couldn't get.

Speaker 3 cameos because people are like what show is this i'm playing myself no i don't people didn't want to play themselves right started to change around season three the more we became slightly more popular.

Speaker 3 And then usually, when people came on to do a cameo, they wanted to be there, so they came into it with a good attitude.

Speaker 1 What about Kanye West? Awesome.

Speaker 3 He was phenomenal. He came in, he and that episode is

Speaker 3 some people really enjoy that episode from the way he debuted the song Good Life at the end of that episode. So that was like a cool.
Not only was he playing himself, but he had a new song coming out.

Speaker 3 I think it was like one of the first times they used that as a platform to like launch a song. If memory serves me me correctly, no, that's great.

Speaker 1 That counts. What about Lamar Odom? Ooh.

Speaker 3 Lamar Odom was on.

Speaker 1 I'm just trying to.

Speaker 1 Oh, yeah, okay. CC.
Yeah, you're forgetting that this is actually smart of you to be like, I don't remember. I can't remember.
You would probably take one of those weird Viagra.

Speaker 1 Lamar Odom doesn't ring a bell.

Speaker 3 No, I'm telling you, this was 2005. Let me ask you about some stuff that happened.
No idea.

Speaker 1 No idea. No idea.

Speaker 1 I was probably watching Lamar Odom in a college apartment.

Speaker 3 The Odom stuff was cool because that was directly after us shooting at a Laker game, which we shot at a real Laker game in courtside seat.

Speaker 3 So that was just an awesome day in general as a huge basketball fan.

Speaker 1 Right, right. Tom Brady, you should have just said that you were like method acting and you were always in character and just talk shit to him the entire time.

Speaker 1 I'm like De Niro. What am I going to say?

Speaker 1 Okay, that was

Speaker 1 three years ago

Speaker 1 at that point.

Speaker 3 And all right, yes, I'm sure he's super bummed that he lost that super, but he's not like he doesn't have a shortage of rings there. Yeah.

Speaker 1 What about Gary Busey?

Speaker 1 Gary, future guest of the show.

Speaker 3 Is he coming on?

Speaker 1 No, I met him. He had a little tangle with SeaWorld on Twitter, so I intervened and said, I'll face fucking

Speaker 1 SeaWorld, and then he followed me. I was like, hey, you want to come on? He's like, yeah.

Speaker 3 You should definitely have Busey.

Speaker 1 Yeah. We're going to.

Speaker 3 He's one of the more quotable people I've ever met.

Speaker 3 I remember when he first came on, I think he said to our show creator, Doug Allen, like, I'm not going to give you your words because nobody can write Gary Busey like Gary Busey.

Speaker 3 It's going to give you me.

Speaker 1 And we were like, all right, let's go. Do it.
Let's go.

Speaker 3 And he, and that is exactly what Gary did.

Speaker 1 Full view. You nailed it.

Speaker 1 Yes.

Speaker 1 Who was the, was there anyone that was like difficult to work with at all?

Speaker 3 No, man. I got to say, like, as far as cameos, like I said, people wanted to be there.

Speaker 3 I mean, no, I mean, certainly people had bad days here or there where they were just tired, but I've never walked away saying, like, oh, that person's really difficult.

Speaker 1 Yeah. And at the end of the day, they're there to help your show.
You're there to help them. So there's probably like a lot of sense.

Speaker 3 And like, come on. Look, it should be taken seriously, but also, like, let's not, like, what are we doing here? We're trying to entertain people.

Speaker 3 Let's not take, like, we're not solving real world problems here.

Speaker 3 If you have a bad attitude, that's on you.

Speaker 1 Okay, so these entourage questions are probably annoying you. So, this is my last entourage question.

Speaker 1 What is the most annoying thing that fans say to you when they see you on the street?

Speaker 3 There was a world early on when people genuinely believed that entourage was real and thought it was real.

Speaker 1 You're saying it's not? It is.

Speaker 3 So you might have came up to me in like circa 2006 and you actually thought we all lived together. Yeah.
That was always like, you'd be like, Tro, where's Vince? And I'm like,

Speaker 3 he's at the Playboy Man. What do you want me to say? How far do you want to play that?

Speaker 3 So that was always really.

Speaker 1 I'm sure you probably also got offered a shitload of weed.

Speaker 3 There's been many a blunt that I've said no to. If for nothing else,

Speaker 1 you don't really really know what else.

Speaker 3 Also, do we really want to, do we know what's really in it?

Speaker 1 True. No.
Good point. Come on.
I hate that when drug dealers give me more points.

Speaker 3 The disappointment when I turn down a joint or a blunt or even a drink from someone. Yeah.

Speaker 1 What? I know. Yeah.
You're not going to

Speaker 1 have to do it. Yeah.
Usually I just, if somebody offers us two drinks, I just take big cats because he's not going to be a drink. I just am like, I don't do shots.

Speaker 1 I swore off shots in like 2014 because of what reason.

Speaker 3 Good happens.

Speaker 1 Nothing. Nothing good.
Nothing. Yeah, absolutely.

Speaker 1 I have one more entourage-related question.

Speaker 1 What is your medellin?

Speaker 1 What do you want to do? That's like your big project, your passion that you have that you want to get off the ground. See the next one, a playoff game.
Let's not.

Speaker 1 This is realistic. Yeah.
We're talking about here.

Speaker 3 There is one that I just am now. I'm officially too old and out of shape.
I always wanted to make the Arturo Gaddi movie. I was a huge Arturo Gaddi movie.

Speaker 3 There's been a ton of stuff, obviously, about Mickey Ward. Arturo Gaddi died died really young and tragically.
And there was a world where I had some rights to do that, but time has gone on.

Speaker 3 And I'm just,

Speaker 3 I'm, I'm just too old and out of shape. And I don't know if I'm willing to be like six months of hard work like Michael B.
Jordan and like Creed. I don't know if I'm willing to do all that.

Speaker 1 Through right check.

Speaker 3 Yeah, I don't think that check will be there.

Speaker 1 Okay, we'll get it going. Let's get it going.

Speaker 3 Passion projects don't often generate the big checks. That's true.

Speaker 1 You got to do your Aquaman.

Speaker 1 So what's your Aquaman?

Speaker 3 It's going to fund fund your metaen i did have someone i don't know who said this to me we were talking about superhero stuff and i was like well i i'm never gonna be mistaken for a superhero and you're like you never robin maybe

Speaker 1 i guess robin

Speaker 1 i mean they go there's like b-man or ant-man or whatever the fuck it is cast paul rudds i know but it's well established they've got nerd characters what's his name jimmy olson the the photographer from the superman movies yeah you could be him but is he really a superhero maybe in maybe in the second one

Speaker 3 maybe that would defy the comic books He gets some runoff. I think they would have to really change some stuff in the Spider-Man universe.

Speaker 1 That must be so sweet, though, if you do get a gig where you're playing an athlete and you just get paid to lose a shitload of weight and get into the best shape of your life.

Speaker 1 That's like my dream, honestly.

Speaker 3 Yeah, I just, I think the only, I don't know what athlete I'm playing at this,

Speaker 3 first of all, ever,

Speaker 3 physically, but then now certainly at this point in my life, I don't know what athlete I'm ever playing.

Speaker 1 Speaking of the Knicks, going back to them, are you a Knicks fan that speaks honestly or a Knicks fan that still wants courtside tickets so that you like sit on Dolan's lap I speak honestly okay so go what what what's what what is he asking

Speaker 1 and they screw everything up

Speaker 1 and they didn't even take a meeting with Kevin Durant and James Dolan's ruining the franchise and his band sucks

Speaker 1 none of you told us to speak honestly we don't give a fuck no I was more asking what's the question like

Speaker 1 that's what he was like go ahead speak honestly like a writing like of what to expect coming into 2019 2000 expect Just what do you think about the franchise?

Speaker 1 How much of what Big Kat and I just said do you agree with 100%?

Speaker 1 I don't even remember what.

Speaker 3 I mean,

Speaker 3 he said nine things.

Speaker 1 Yeah, yeah,

Speaker 1 they all count. Will the next make an Eastern Conference finals in your lifetime? See, now you're just straight up trolling.

Speaker 3 Yes, I'm going to say yes. If you think I'm being too optimistic about that, I then hopefully, I mean, I'm planning on living a long time.

Speaker 1 Yeah, how long are you planning on living? I'm planning on living a long time. Okay, if you get the Gotti movie, then you get in great shape.
You add another 10 years on it. There you go.

Speaker 1 Maybe Maybe you'll finally get there. There you go.

Speaker 3 We were in the second round, six years.

Speaker 1 Second round, yeah, that's true.

Speaker 3 That's one round away from the Eastern Conference final.

Speaker 1 That's true. That's good.

Speaker 1 I'm surprised that he fans know how the playoffs go. Steve Novak.

Speaker 3 Discount double check.

Speaker 1 Let's go. Mellow.
Do you think the Knicks can bring back Mello for a little farewell tour?

Speaker 1 I mean, I don't.

Speaker 3 I don't even. Would he want to come back to the High Conference?

Speaker 1 I think Mello wants to play with anyone who will have him.

Speaker 3 I don't know. I don't know.
I think he probably wants to play for a team that has a legit shot at

Speaker 3 getting to a title or the Eastern or Western Conference finals.

Speaker 1 Were you all in on like, did you do the memes, like the Zion, Kyrie, Kevin Durant?

Speaker 3 Dude, I was really trying to convince my wife because we just had a baby four months ago, like, we should name this kid Zion.

Speaker 3 The conversation didn't really advance too far past that, and fortunately enough, because the lottery, the lottery ping-pong balls have not bounced our way.

Speaker 1 So you named him RJ? Exactly. Yeah.

Speaker 3 You named him Mitchell Robbins.

Speaker 1 What is the highlight of your life as a Knicks fan? And you're not allowed to say any of the Ewing years. Those don't count.

Speaker 1 Damn. The modern era.
There's nothing.

Speaker 3 The highlight of my Knicks fandom post-Ewing era.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 3 I'm going to have to go back to eliminating the Celtics, I guess, in that, I guess it was 2013.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 3 Getting out of the first round.

Speaker 1 First round, yeah.

Speaker 3 And I mean, unless we want to start talking, Lynn's sanity was fun.

Speaker 1 Like Like those two weeks. Linsanity was done.
That was a great two weeks.

Speaker 3 That was an awesome two weeks. But it really was.

Speaker 1 Yeah, during Lin Sanity, was there a moment that crept into you where you're like, this is the truth. We are contenders now.

Speaker 3 I think that always happens to Knick fans. Anytime anything positive happens, even remotely, a glimmer, we then say, oh, no, this is it.

Speaker 3 We're on the way up. We're on the come up.
It's happening.

Speaker 1 So you lost a lot of weight.

Speaker 3 I did, slowly coming back.

Speaker 1 Well, no, it's not. Come on.
You look great. I yo-yo with my weight.
And a lot of times people say that if I lost a lot of weight, which I don't think I ever will be able to,

Speaker 1 that I would be less funny. Did you deal with that?

Speaker 3 Yes.

Speaker 1 How did you overcome that? And you're like, I'm just going to be a fucking Fitzpo. No, I just wasn't.

Speaker 3 First of all, I never think I was particularly funny to begin with. So I don't think our...

Speaker 1 Self-deprecation.

Speaker 3 Yeah, that was a way to go.

Speaker 1 That was certainly

Speaker 3 a way to go.

Speaker 3 I just didn't really understand how, I guess, if I'm smaller in proportion, I'm less funny. I think you're either funny or you're not.

Speaker 1 Well, it was tough because it's obviously the character.

Speaker 1 I guess the evolution of the character changed too, like where you became, you know, you were the driver smoking weed, playing video games, and then you became a millionaire.

Speaker 3 I'll tell you what has happened, though, doing power for five years, which is a cable drama as opposed to a comedy, I have gotten in the last couple of years for other jobs, like, can you do comedy?

Speaker 1 Right.

Speaker 3 Like, you're kind of only looking at the current thing and not going back in the files. Like, I mean, I have

Speaker 3 done comedy, so I'm going to say, yeah, but they look at power. It's like, that's a gritty kind of cable drama.
Does he do comedy?

Speaker 1 It's like, yeah, I expect that like Chris Pratt probably deals with something like that nowadays, where he's like so known for being a superhero and he's in shape now. It's like, hey,

Speaker 1 are you able to be the funny guy still?

Speaker 1 But I do think that he's one case. Maybe Seth Rogan is another, where they lost weight and for whatever reason, they're less funny to me.
I don't know if that's fair. Seth Rogan's less funny to me.

Speaker 1 Yeah,

Speaker 1 it probably says more about me than I'm like, oh, I wish that guy was chubby so I could laugh at him. Like, I think that's probably more about me than I think so.
He's a chubby chaser, too.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I do love that. I mean, literally all of his stuff.
He's stuck with it. Exactly.
Understood. Understood.
Yeah, it's crazy. He has this podcast from guys in Austin.

Speaker 1 They all came up and they like, I was staring in the mirror. Yeah, more Christian.
What the hell? A bunch of views.

Speaker 1 What are you guys on around? What can I say? Yeah.

Speaker 1 That's funny.

Speaker 1 Do you, this is a technical question, acting side.

Speaker 3 Did you reach a point where you don't have to try out for roles anymore you just get them no no no is that something that happens yeah so like the big guys yes they call offer only you're offer only that's yeah i didn't know that existed that's a great phrase yeah i'm an offer only guy i'm an offer only guy exactly i only take the offers there's a point you reach in your career where whatever your level of talent or fame has gotten to where you're not auditioning unless there's a rare occasion where it's like something that you're so different and outside the box for that particular character You may have to go in, but like Chris Pratt, I'm sure, is not going into the audition room anytime.

Speaker 3 He's off room.

Speaker 1 So what is the role you auditioned for that maybe the world doesn't know about that we can break some news? You would have played

Speaker 1 Tony Stark.

Speaker 3 No, again, not

Speaker 3 spoiler. Yeah, not playing a superhero anytime.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 3 I don't know if I really have one that's like, oh, wow, you didn't get that? Or one that I was actually in consideration.

Speaker 1 Yeah, one that you auditioned for, and you're like, this would have been awesome if I got this.

Speaker 3 There's actually a show coming out that

Speaker 3 I'm not going to speak about because I'm not a part of it and I don't know where they're at with it, but I think it's going to do well.

Speaker 3 And I was up for a part in it, and I auditioned and obviously did not get it, but I think that one's actually going to do. That's so crazy.

Speaker 1 Can you just give us like a description of the character, like a little bit, so that when it comes out, we're like, that's what he was talking about.

Speaker 1 All right, so there's a couch, a black couch, and a camera.

Speaker 3 Oh, you're describing the audition room, huh? The casting couch.

Speaker 1 How bad do you want want to?

Speaker 3 Well, let me just tell you, nowadays, you barely even go into an audition room anymore. You make a self-tape at home and you send like a Vimeo link.
Really?

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 I don't like it.

Speaker 1 I don't like it either. So maybe that's the next, like someone hacks all the Vimeo links instead of the iClouds.
And then we get now all the shitty embarrassing. Yeah, I like that.

Speaker 1 Well, sure, someone's working at home feverishly trying to figure out.

Speaker 3 But yeah, I mean, I think it's now maybe only 10% of the time that if I get an audition, I'm actually going in the room and meeting the people and

Speaker 1 i feel crazy getting over here give it to me again give it to me a different way right they say that no yeah usually or they give you a no and they say try it and do that or because i think also the worst is if you don't get any notes if you do your audition they're like thank you you know it's not yeah you're saving some time that was great and you walk out like something that was the opposite of great yeah i've always heard that that on set if you uh if a director's like giving you little notes or something like that they're they never say the line the way they want to hear it.

Speaker 1 They give you kind of a roundabout instruction for motivation instead of saying something and asking you to copy it. Is that true?

Speaker 3 Right, because it's called another, if we're going to get fancy terms here.

Speaker 1 Yeah,

Speaker 3 a line reading, that's called, right? So if the line is like, do me a favor, pass that water. That's the line, right?

Speaker 1 Oh, that's so. See how it's so convincing.
It's so acting. It was so convincing.

Speaker 3 If someone comes up to you and says, say it like this, do me a favor, go get me that word. Like, you're all trying to mimic something is a little, it just gets stuck in your head.

Speaker 3 It's the only way you'll ever be able to do it. So, I think people try to not do line readings, aren't always appreciated.

Speaker 1 Yeah, you'd be insulted if a director.

Speaker 3 Not insulted, just like, ah, all right,

Speaker 3 that's fun. I'm just going to be a robot and give it to you exactly the way you want.

Speaker 1 All right, give me this line. I don't know about the afterlife, but this life is sweet.
Never heard that. That's the corniest line ever.
I just looked it up.

Speaker 1 It's also from 12 years ago.

Speaker 3 Again, I repeat.

Speaker 1 No, maybe longer. Fuck the fucking Mercedes-Vince.
What are you? A soccer mom? 14 years ago, you've gone back.

Speaker 3 Okay, so I'm going to, let's try to see what you were saying. 14 years ago.

Speaker 1 No, you're right. You're right.
I want to talk about video games real quick. So you're passionate about video games.
Hell yeah.

Speaker 1 Do you own a team? No, no, no. Oh, I do.
Sorry.

Speaker 3 I wish I did.

Speaker 1 You own a team? Yeah, some team in New Zealand. I actually don't know the name of it.

Speaker 3 I can't tell if you're being dead serious.

Speaker 3 Okay, what do they compete in? What game?

Speaker 1 Fucking vibrant game. Computer games.

Speaker 3 Are you making money off this venture? I know.

Speaker 1 we just wire someone money in New Zealand and now you own a game.

Speaker 3 I got one for you, too, if you like to invest.

Speaker 1 Okay, I'm in. All right.

Speaker 3 I'll give you my routing number.

Speaker 1 But yeah, how did you get into video games? Like, what do you actually do day to day in the video game community?

Speaker 3 So, I mean, I've just always been a gamer since I was a kid.

Speaker 3 I actually help with the Knicks gaming team, which is

Speaker 3 a team in the NBA 2K league.

Speaker 1 That's why you started. Not really.

Speaker 3 I mean,

Speaker 1 so they started. Do you know the game 2K? Yeah.

Speaker 3 There's a professional NBA 2K league team with 21 real NBA franchises that have a team in it. And I've been the scout and consultant for the Knicks gaming team.
You're a scout.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Is there like a rift in the e-gaming scouting community between analytics and manalytics where you're like, I just like that guy's grit? No, there's no rift.

Speaker 3 Analytics are a huge part.

Speaker 1 How do you look at a guy playing video games and be like, I like his thumbs?

Speaker 3 See, again,

Speaker 3 if you want to go down this road, that is just not not the way to think about it. I hear what you're saying.
Yes, you're analyzing his like hand-eye clarity.

Speaker 3 It's really just more, you got to just look at it like traditional basketball. What are his numbers?

Speaker 3 You look at stuff like how he operates in the pick and roll, his true, you know, true shooting efficiency, stuff like that. Those are real analytics that you look at.

Speaker 1 So you're monitoring the actual gameplay, not so much the person.

Speaker 3 No, but then you do a whole interview process with the actual person to see a little bit more about what type of guy or girl they are.

Speaker 1 Got it. So what is your favorite game of all time? Like, what was your go-to game? Have you always been a single-communist?

Speaker 3 Well, as a kid, it was Mike Tyson's Punch Addition 007-373-5963. Code to get up to Mike Tyson.

Speaker 3 As I got a little bit older and gaming got better, I mean, obviously, Madden was a huge game, Halo, and then I really kind of settled in on Call of Duty was

Speaker 3 Modern Warfare 1.

Speaker 1 Okay, what about the most recent one? That one was awesome. Black Alpha.
Oh, okay.

Speaker 3 Yeah, yeah. I mean, the new one coming, which the beta is out for now, or maybe the alpha, it's coming at the end of October.
That's Modern Warfare 4.

Speaker 1 Do you

Speaker 1 game online with everyone? Sure. I stream on Twitter.

Speaker 3 You want to squat up? Let's go.

Speaker 1 I'll squat up with you.

Speaker 3 Anytime, dude.

Speaker 1 Dude, I love squatting up.

Speaker 3 We're going to get dubs or what? We're going to win?

Speaker 1 I'm more of a grab a shotgun and just run up on people and shoot them as fast as I can and then die. But I'm in for whatever.

Speaker 3 Listen, man, I will support you.

Speaker 1 Yeah, you need one wild card,

Speaker 1 right?

Speaker 3 I will support you. Yes, you do.
They often can win you games.

Speaker 1 I usually, if you look at my stats, I'm usually like,

Speaker 1 I get killed 25 times and I get 10 kills.

Speaker 3 So you're killed death, you're like a minus one plan.

Speaker 1 Pretty much. I'm just running around getting smoked.

Speaker 3 We'll have to get some other players to help us.

Speaker 3 They're called the carry. We might need a couple of carries.

Speaker 1 That's really a term?

Speaker 3 Yeah, like guys who are really good that carry you to victory because we.

Speaker 1 So that's what they've been saying to me when they mute me on the. They're like, oh, we got to carry him.
This guy, we got to carry him again.

Speaker 1 Okay, yeah, because I always get in the lobby and then everyone leaves.

Speaker 1 Hey, guys, we're really good.

Speaker 1 Hello? Gotta go. Hello? Get the fuck out of here.
I'm all alone. How close are you to becoming a professional gamer, or do you just want to stay on the scouting side?

Speaker 3 I'm not. First of all, I don't have enough time to commit to actually become good enough to ever be a pro because it is a huge time commitment.

Speaker 3 And I really do think something happens to hand-eye coordination at a certain age. So

Speaker 3 I'm out. Interesting.

Speaker 1 Is there an add-er-all problem in e-gaming? Not that I've seen, though. Shit, I'm always trying to uncover some kind of scalable.
Also, here you go. I'll give you a hot tip.
Hot tip. Esports.
Esports.

Speaker 1 Esports, sorry. Already on a team.
Yeah. That's what I say.
E-gaming, you're going to be like, this guy does not know the first thing about.

Speaker 1 I very clearly don't. What about bottled oxygen? I've seen some guys like putting up to their nose in the middle of games.

Speaker 3 I've, again, never seen it.

Speaker 3 If it works. I've never seen that before.

Speaker 1 You're like a pre-Mitchell report scout.

Speaker 1 Where you're like, I don't know why these guys are hitting home runs.

Speaker 3 But also, like,

Speaker 3 I don't know if you, like, proudly announce. Is that something you'd be broadcasting?

Speaker 1 no no no probably not coming up right they'll they'll they'll leave a bottle of andro in their locker afterwards and then reporters will find that and be like that's what it is the Senate 1997

Speaker 1 the Senate's committee is gonna like you know do a FOIA on your emails and it's gonna you're gonna be like I don't know why Eric Gagne is saving all these things

Speaker 3 by the way you guys have some dope dated references you made

Speaker 1 Eric Gagne yeah we probably we're just kind of finished at like 2008 so if you learn anything past the age of 30 you're a sucker yeah big time. Yeah.
That's kind of, yeah.

Speaker 1 What have you learned that's useful past the age of 30?

Speaker 3 Only stuff that's really pertaining to like marriage and family and that stuff because I was never married or had a kid before. So

Speaker 3 the last five years, I've learned a lot on that level. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Okay. I guess that's one flaw in my art.
I'm a dad, too. So I'm just not a kid.
I've had some hard time.

Speaker 1 He's 10 weeks. Really? Yeah,

Speaker 3 and you're awake?

Speaker 1 Yeah. Barely.
I'm sure.

Speaker 1 He's actually already sleeping through the night. Nobody's lying.

Speaker 3 He's a fucking chill-ass baby. So he's a big kid.

Speaker 1 No, he's just a chill-ass baby.

Speaker 3 I don't know. He's just chills.
And he's sleeping through the night already.

Speaker 1 Yep. How do you like me now?

Speaker 3 I'm just, I am, that is like.

Speaker 1 We give him drugs every night to make sure he falls asleep. But yeah, that whole thing.
You have to. Plus, he takes bottled oxygen before the show.

Speaker 1 Why did you choose not to vaccinate your kids?

Speaker 1 Good question. He's actually started a rumor that I didn't vaccinate.
Well, you call it a rumor, but if it gets good enough, it becomes truth. But no, you're in the middle of the morning.

Speaker 3 Why did you start that that rumor?

Speaker 1 Because you just wanted to fuck with British. I was bored and wanted to fuck with big cats.
Did that catch on? 90% of the stuff that we do goes to the city of the world.

Speaker 1 Yeah, a few people were like, what the hell, dude? But you're in the Hollywood circle, so I'm sure you've had some people be like, hey, Jerry, what are you doing? Vaccinating your kid. I'm not real.

Speaker 1 I mean, you also live in Williamsburg, so that's like ground zero for unvaccinated children at this point.

Speaker 3 I have not caught all of what you're talking about. Is it?

Speaker 1 Yeah. Yeah.
People go door to door with flyers. They do very religious

Speaker 3 Jews, which I can say as well, because they go door to to door with flyers.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Saying, like, do not vaccinate your children.
Yeah.

Speaker 3 Dead serious. And that's effective.

Speaker 1 We've gotten into a wolf. In Williamsburg, it is.
We're in a swamp right now. I don't know how to get out of this part of the world.
Here, I'll get out of it.

Speaker 1 Vaccinate your kids and spay and neuter your pets. Power.
Let's talk about power. Power on stars.
Power on stars. That's a great segment.
Yeah,

Speaker 1 that was like the Grateful Dead drums section where everyone took a piss. They're like, what's going on? We want to take a break from this interview.

Speaker 1 I went to one of their shows one time, and they had a wolf sound effect howling in the middle of the drum solo, which is really trippy. But so that's what we're doing right now.

Speaker 1 But we're talking about power. So power put in the wolf sound effect.

Speaker 1 Tell me why you decided to start with the show. What's been good about it? What you like and what we have to expect from it.

Speaker 3 What was the first part of that? Why I started it?

Speaker 1 Yeah, what drew you to this project?

Speaker 3 What drew me to the project was I was a fan of the show in season one. I almost was working on it in season one.
It didn't schedule-wise work out.

Speaker 3 The woman who created the show, Courtney Kemp, told me,

Speaker 3 I'm going to write something for you next year, and I hope you want to do it. It's going to be good.
And I've heard that quite a few times in my career, and that never really ever becomes anything.

Speaker 3 And she actually did it. Called me a year later.
I was like, I wrote this character. He's the criminal defense attorney, and it's going somewhere.

Speaker 3 She pitched me a whole bunch of stuff that's happening in future seasons, and she did not only everything that she said she was going to do, but more. I've been on the show for five years.

Speaker 3 It started off as a smaller character, and it kept growing year over year.

Speaker 1 Is that rare in Hollywood or in TV production or film production where somebody will actually follow through on something that they promise you?

Speaker 3 I mean,

Speaker 3 I think everybody means well. I think when they say it, but it's almost like overextending or maybe they don't even have the authority to do what they said they wanted to do.
In this case, she did.

Speaker 3 She was the boss. So,

Speaker 3 I mean, yeah, I've definitely had people say, we should work together. I'm going to write something for you.
And it's like, all right.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Do you ever have anybody come up to you and they're like, I know you from somewhere?

Speaker 1 Sully. You were in Sully?

Speaker 1 Not that long. Yeah.
That's like a blink.

Speaker 3 If you blink, you miss me kind of thing.

Speaker 3 I love those interactions where it's it's like, I know you from somewhere. Have we met before? I'm like, I don't think so.
And they're like, wait, you're an actor.

Speaker 3 Yes, that's true. Where do I know you from? I'm like,

Speaker 3 let's do the IMDb thing. All right.

Speaker 1 Entourage.

Speaker 3 No, no.

Speaker 3 Okay.

Speaker 1 Power.

Speaker 3 What's power? No. All right.

Speaker 1 I'm running out of projects.

Speaker 3 Think like a man.

Speaker 3 And then they do pull out something random like King of Queens, 2001. I'm like, yes, I did three episodes of King of Queens.

Speaker 3 What's a residual on that? Oddly enough, I just got one like a week ago for like $67.

Speaker 1 That's pretty cool. I'm hanging strong.
I'm obsessed with residuals. I need to get a residual.

Speaker 1 Bad. Should we get one from ESPN? I mean, we should get something that just shows up every month.

Speaker 3 What is it? Mailbox month? Yeah. Yeah, every month.
There's a residual cycle.

Speaker 1 That's nice. We got to get on it.
All right, my last question. So check out Power.
It just actually, season six just debuted.

Speaker 3 It just debuted last Sunday.

Speaker 1 Yeah, so check it out on stars. My last question, SeatGeek question, promo code take, use it.
You get $10 off SeatGeek purchase. We made fun of you for the Knicks.
We made fun of you for the Giants.

Speaker 1 So are the Yankees going to win the World Series?

Speaker 3 I really think they are.

Speaker 1 If they are in this field, no pitching, though.

Speaker 3 Yes, but also have bounced back from situations where you, like, obviously

Speaker 3 the Boston massacre, everybody thought that happened in July. We bounced back strong from that.

Speaker 3 I think it's real. I feel like in a couple of years past, last two, three years, we've been optimistic.
We weren't quite there. I feel like we're Aaron Judge.

Speaker 1 Do you trust Aaron Boone?

Speaker 3 Yeah.

Speaker 3 I do. And not that we have a choice, but yeah,

Speaker 1 we do.

Speaker 3 And, okay, last, last question.

Speaker 1 Aaron Judge, does he have his pinstripes?

Speaker 3 We mean, does he have, like, he's earned?

Speaker 1 You know what I mean?

Speaker 3 I mean, I think so. I think he's still, I mean, he's young.
I think this is going to be a perfect moment.

Speaker 1 Yeah, that sounds like a no.

Speaker 3 What I mean is playoff basketball is where you're in pinstrip.

Speaker 1 Baseball is where you're in pinstripes.

Speaker 3 And I think this is going to be a huge stage for him.

Speaker 1 So not. He has not earned his pinstripes yet to earn his pinstripes.

Speaker 1 Well on his way.

Speaker 3 Well on his way.

Speaker 1 He's on his way to earning pinstripes. Does Stanton have pinstripes?

Speaker 1 No. No.
Okay. No, no.
Does anybody on the team have pinstripes?

Speaker 3 Gardner.

Speaker 1 Cece. Cecilia.
Cecilia.

Speaker 1 They're slimming on him.

Speaker 3 I think DD could be well on his way. Yeah.
Okay. Yeah.
I mean, it's a young team. It's hard to give out pinstripes for young guys.
That's true.

Speaker 3 Do you have like a.

Speaker 1 How does it work? Is there like a committee of Yankee fans that decide the pinstripes?

Speaker 3 If there is, I am not a part of said committee so you can't talk

Speaker 1 exactly yes it's like some underground yeah yeah i got you what are you winking at me right now what about brian cashman how come he always finds himself in these like weird situations every month where he's like getting arrested that was weird yes it was right yes it was i don't

Speaker 1 because his car got stolen and he was going to retrieve his own car without the police involved i don't even know how that that that happened you're doing good you're doing good as an inside member of the council not damn it not letting anything out of house the diversion works yeah the cashman diversion works.

Speaker 1 All right. Well, Jerry, thank you so much.
Appreciate you stopping by. Check out Power on Stars.
Debuted last week, season six.

Speaker 1 Watch it because you're a great actor.

Speaker 3 I look forward to seeing you on the pickup basketball court one day for a while.

Speaker 1 Dude, I actually have a run if you want to come.

Speaker 3 I would love to come. No, seriously.
I'm dead serious. I play three, four times a week less than.

Speaker 1 Saturday mornings. Okay.
Can you do Saturday mornings? Yeah. Manhattan.
Yeah. Okay, perfect.
You're in.

Speaker 3 Don't set no hard picks. Nope.

Speaker 1 No, you're good. You're perfect.
It's a really shitty player, so you'll fit in well.

Speaker 3 All right, sweet. Can anyone shoot?

Speaker 1 Yeah, there's a couple. All right.

Speaker 1 I'm more of a carrier. You're a carrier.

Speaker 6 All protein bars generally taste the same, but not one bars. One-made protein bars are actually delicious with Reese's and Hershey's.

Speaker 6 Only one Reese's Peanut Butter Lover's protein bar is made with Reese's peanut butter, and only one Hershey's cookies and cream protein bars is made with Hershey's cookie bits while delivering 18 grams of protein and 3 grams of sugar.

Speaker 6 One bars are the perfect protein bar to get you through your busy day whether you need a quick pick-me-up between meetings or you need some fuel to power you through your next workout.

Speaker 6 One also has other delicious flavors like birthday cake, maple glazed donut, and blueberry cobbler. Find all one bars at a retailer near you or on Amazon.com.

Speaker 1 The interview is also brought to you by Roman Swipes. Most guys have tried different ways to last longer.
I like to think about Mr. and Mrs.
Met just getting it on.

Speaker 1 That usually helps me, but it doesn't always work. The folks at Roman, an online men's health company, they're changing the game with Roman swipes, the secret to longer-lasting sex.

Speaker 1 Roman swipes are a clinically proven way to last longer in bed. They're effective, they're easy to use, fast-acting, but they don't require a prescription.
Roman can

Speaker 1 ship swipes to you in discrete, unmarked packaging, and each swipes packet is small enough to hide in your wallet for whenever you need it. Swipes are great.

Speaker 1 They're not going to transfer to your partner, so you can last longer without worrying about that. They're super easy to use.

Speaker 1 Just take the swipes out of the packet, swipe it on, let it dry, and you're good to go. That's it.
When you go to getroman.com/slash take, you can get your first month of swipes for just $5

Speaker 1 when you choose a monthly plan. That's using the link getroman, G-E-T-R-O-M-A-N

Speaker 1 dot com

Speaker 1 slash take.

Speaker 1 All right, let's get to some segments.

Speaker 1 Oh, oh, whoa. Is the cow okay? What happened? Sorry to do like a sound.
Is that the cow that fell down and now Big Cat has to kill it? Breaking moves.

Speaker 1 Federer lost. Oh, the goat.
My goat. No, I'm going to troll tweet this right now.

Speaker 1 Live turn. Okay, hold on.
You don't want to do this. What do you want to do?

Speaker 1 Should I add hubs or not at hubs?

Speaker 1 The big question.

Speaker 1 Subbing is more of a troll move. It is more of a troll move, yeah.

Speaker 1 He must have used Roman swipes. I think he lasted longer than Jokovich, at least.
As a minus 1,000

Speaker 2 favorite. He wasn't minus 1,000, but the dude that won was plus 1,000.

Speaker 1 Hank. Is this true? Hank, did he retire or did he lose? He just lost.
Interesting. So he didn't quit.
That's not true. No, no, no.
No, he didn't battle an injury like Jokovich did. He didn't quote.

Speaker 1 The Joko quit, and he probably was playing with sub-par balls because Doug Gottlieb stole all of them last night. Okay, I just heard Federer lost as a minus 1,000 favorite.
Is this true? There we go.

Speaker 1 We'll let that one out there. I'll just, that's one of those tweets you tweet, and then like two hours later, I'll go to my mentions and be like, why the fuck are people talking tennis?

Speaker 1 And I forgot that I tweeted it. You just can't admit that Jokovich is the goat is a bad take and strong on it.

Speaker 1 Ask me, let me ask you this. What is Nadal and Federer's record against Jokovich the last nine times they fissed? One and eight is the answer.

Speaker 1 One and eight. Federer is one and eight.
Federer is also like one and eight.

Speaker 1 He's 20 years older. One and eight.
Federer is bad. He's above.
Federer is the best. Jokovich is the best.
I can't believe you

Speaker 1 trolled me into caring about tennis, but here we are in power. Roger Federer is.

Speaker 2 I hate to say this, but Novox got two and two slams in 2019.

Speaker 1 Federer has none. Of course he does.
So he's better right now. He's the goat.
He's better right now. He's the goat.
All right. Andy beat him in Wimbledon.
No big deal. Okay, so power rankings.

Speaker 1 Power rankings. AKA Pete Prisco is a fucking idiot.
Yep, that's our sex segment. Prisco loves to troll with his preseason power rankings.

Speaker 1 No bigger troll than putting the Packers as number one. Except, here's the thing about Prisco.
He genuinely believes all of his shitty opinions are good. Right.

Speaker 1 Which is why we kind of respect him on this show. But so are you saying he's trolling? Or that's the question.
No, he genuinely believes that he's smarter than everyone else and that he's seen things

Speaker 1 that nobody else can see. So he thinks like he has an advanced set of eyes that can pick up on things on tape that nobody else sees.

Speaker 2 So he just went into this blind. These were his power rankings.
He wasn't like, this is going to get a rise out of you folks.

Speaker 1 So we're going to power rank.

Speaker 1 We're going to do a shitty power rankings of Pete Prisco's power rankings. We'll go back and forth.
We'll do five. I'll start with number one.
The Green Bay Packers being number one.

Speaker 1 They didn't make the playoffs last year. That's fine.
They didn't make the playoffs last year. This is like putting them.
No, I'm not. You know what?

Speaker 1 I'm not going to say what. I've been getting a lot of people saying, hey, big cat, why do you hate Nebraska? Why do you always always go after Nebraska?

Speaker 1 I wasn't going to say that Nebraska went four and eight last year and then somehow was in the top 25 this year. I wasn't going to say it.
They won four out of the last five.

Speaker 1 I wasn't going to dominate it. I wasn't going to say it.

Speaker 1 According to Pete, the Matt LaFleur-Aaron Rodgers relationship will be fine. So first reported by Pete Prisco.

Speaker 1 Audible Gate is my latest news scandal. Who's calling him? I like that pick as Packers number one, actually.
There you go. Because they have the boat, Aaron Rodgers playing quarterback.

Speaker 1 Shout out Max Kellerman. Good name.

Speaker 1 So So my first qualm with Pete Prisco is going to be having the Chargers at number four. I'm low on the Chargers.
You guys know I'm a Super Chargers fan. Yeah, and I'm low on them.

Speaker 1 I do like the Chargers too, but they're missing Derwin James. They're missing Melvin Gordon right now.
Derwin James is probably my favorite young player in the NFL.

Speaker 1 And if you know anything about the Chargers, with the exception of just last year, they're going to lose four out of their first five and then rally and knock off like 10 in a row.

Speaker 1 I also have a take I'm squatting on, which hurts me to say, but everyone keeps pointing around like Tom Brady, don't

Speaker 1 Ben Roethlisberger. One of these guys is going to age overnight.
Don't. Don't.
Maybe Phil Rivers. Don't.
No. We need Phil Privers.

Speaker 1 I know, I know, but I'm saying one of these guys will, and it feels like everyone just forgetting Phil Rivers out on the West Coast.

Speaker 1 I actually think that if you put Phil Rivers on the Pittsburgh Steelers instead of Ben Roethelsberger, they probably would have won like six Super Bowls. Phil?

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 That's the dumbest thing I've ever heard. No, it's not the dumbest thing you've ever heard.

Speaker 1 They would have won six. I think Philip Rivers has gotten a raw deal.

Speaker 1 Yes, at least. At least.
Because Phil Rivers, noted guy who beats the Patriots. I was about to say there's one common denominator there.

Speaker 1 Listen, no, no, there are so many other players on the field at any given time besides Philip Rivers.

Speaker 1 Phillip Rivers was the best quarterback in that draft. All right, good pick.
Good pick.

Speaker 1 How about, I mean,

Speaker 1 the Bears at 11 is insane. I'm sorry.

Speaker 1 I don't think the Bears are going to. I'm worried about the Bears season, but 11 is crazy.

Speaker 1 That's like bad. Yeah, it's pretty good.
I mean, the fact that he has so many teams that didn't make the playoffs in front of him is ridiculous.

Speaker 1 The Falcons, who I am high on, ahead of the Bears right now, is crazy. That's crazy.
It's a this year league. That's crazy.
It is a this year league. That's crazy.

Speaker 1 The Bears defense is going to be number one Hank.

Speaker 1 You didn't listen to Hank. You said it's a this year league.
All right, go ahead. You have a kicker? Yeah, Eddie Pinero.
Okay. Ever heard of him?

Speaker 1 Probably the most pressure ever on a kicker week one. Yeah, that's great.

Speaker 1 You love to hear. That guy is going to melt

Speaker 1 pressure. My next shitty pick.
It's going to be bad.

Speaker 1 He's got the Vikings at 14. Vikings are going to finish 25.

Speaker 2 You're saying Kirk Cousins is on a perfectly average.

Speaker 1 15. 16 would be perfectly average.

Speaker 1 So he has them at least two slots too high. I think they might finish even lower because of the Sloater curse, which, by the way, I am officially putting the dungeon on him.

Speaker 1 So I need to figure out what I'm doing.

Speaker 1 It's got to be the hair bet, right?

Speaker 2 You did. There was a lot of.

Speaker 1 Wait, what? No. If the Vikings win the Super Bowl.
Oh, you're going to cut your hair? Yeah, then I'll make it into a wig and give it to Kirk Cussy. It doesn't really matter, yeah.

Speaker 1 Because he's bald and nobody talks about that. All right, my.

Speaker 2 How do you feel, people? There's a lot of Minnesota fans being like, How could you put on a curse on a team that's already cursed?

Speaker 1 That was kind of the joke. That was the entire point of saying

Speaker 1 the historically awesome and clutch Minnesota Vikings. The fifth pick, so the last pick, I'm going to go deep on Pete Prisco's power rankings.

Speaker 1 I actually think, I think the NFC North is going to be the toughest division this year, and I think the Lions are going to be better than 29th. Okay.

Speaker 1 Like, I don't think the Lions, I think the Lions are better than the Bengals. They're better than the Redskins.
They're better than the Bucs.

Speaker 1 I don't think their defense is going to be good. I just, I think the Lions are going to be friskier than people realize.

Speaker 1 I would like to see Matt Patricia doing those QB drills like John Gruden was doing. Just him having

Speaker 1 a bad one. But just him on a segue.
Yeah. Just like trying to chase people down.
Is it an ACL?

Speaker 1 Whatever he had. Whatever he had.
Is that an exclusive report? Yeah.

Speaker 1 I think the 40, or not the 49ers, the Broncos are too low at 24. Dude, Joe Flacco stinks.
I think the Broncos are too low at 24.

Speaker 1 That altitude, the new pass interference rules, you guys aren't talking about anything. Joe Flacco.

Speaker 1 The defense is really, really good. Joe Flacco doesn't need to be elite.

Speaker 1 He just needs to have people asking the question, could he get back to being elite? And if that's the discussion, then the Broncos are going to finish in the top 16. Okay.
Okay. All right.

Speaker 1 So, yeah, go check out Crisco's stupid fucking power. Dick Fangio.
Yeah, Vic Flacco. You know, that guy brings a little mentality.
He is.

Speaker 1 Until they get away from Joe Flacco, they're going to stink, though. They are not going to score points.
I disagree.

Speaker 1 That defense is going to be good, and they're going to be like, fuck, we're screwed again.

Speaker 1 Joe Flacco is going to draw a minimum of six pass interference penalties.

Speaker 1 All right. Next up, we have Mike Wilbon's name drop.
So this was Skip. Yes.
Skip. Skip Bayless.

Speaker 1 He did an ultimate name drop today. He was talking with Shannon on, was it Undisputed? Is that the name of the show?

Speaker 1 Love the new show on FS1.

Speaker 1 He said, I got a text from Lil Wayne this morning saying that there's more than meets the eye in the LaFleur-Rogers situation, meaning that they're getting ready to uncork a bunch of new secret plays that we haven't seen yet in the preseason, that their relationship is great, actually.

Speaker 1 So Lil Wayne was like looking through his third eye. He was doing the Pete Prisco of sitting at home stoned on your couch and watching their preseason games and saying,

Speaker 1 These two guys, I like their relationship. Everyone says it sucks.
Lil Wayne says it's good. Lil Wayne.
So Skip Bayless texts with Lil Wayne. All the time.
All the time.

Speaker 1 Yeah, they are actually like that. Did you know Matthew Berry texts with Jay-Z? I did know that.
Yeah, it's crazy. Who you got on a collab if they were to each put down like a mixtape together?

Speaker 1 Matthew Berry and Jay-Z and Skip Bayless and Lil Wayne. Uh-huh.
I'll go Skip Bayless and Lil Wayne. I think I got it.
I think I go Weezy Taylor. That would be fire.

Speaker 2 Skip Bayless is a wordsmith.

Speaker 2 They're the same. They're both goats just in their respective professions.
Yes.

Speaker 1 Agrees. All right.
Last up before we get to guys on chicks. Thoughts and prayers.
I don't even remember what this was for. Chris Jericho.
Oh, yeah. So Chris Jericho,

Speaker 1 recurring guest, podcaster, extraordinaire. Loved us.
And wrestler. He had his AEW title belt.
He's not dead, Hank.

Speaker 1 This is one of those, like, I'm excited about Hank.

Speaker 1 Ear thing that your dog does when the garage door goes up. He's like, huh? Yeah, he did the head tilt to the side.

Speaker 1 Chris Jericho had his title belt stolen from him when he was at a Tallahassee Longhorn Steakhouse. Damn.

Speaker 1 We don't victim shame on this podcast, but

Speaker 1 if you leave your title belt in a Tallahassee steakhouse, a wrestling belt in a Tallahassee steakhouse, that is a gold mine. The Montreal steak seasoning screw job.
That is

Speaker 1 1.7 boobs. The Montreal

Speaker 1 Wagyoobops job.

Speaker 1 1.7 boobs. Apparently, it wasn't in the steakhouse.
He was in the steakhouse.

Speaker 1 He left it outside in his limo, and somebody stole it from him.

Speaker 1 But that, again, like, if you pull up to a Tallahassee steakhouse,

Speaker 1 everyone's just looking at it like,

Speaker 1 what does that fancy person have in there? Yeah, maybe a wrestling belt. Even all the servers come outside.

Speaker 1 They assume you're a professional wrestler if you go to a steakhouse in a limousine down there.

Speaker 1 Yeah, it sucks. I'm sorry, Chris Jericho, but first of all, you're a podcaster.
And second of all, you're not dead. You're not dead.
That's a good spin zone.

Speaker 1 But as a podcaster, you should not even be wearing belts. You should just be strictly sweatpants.
True. Should be pants or bird dogs.
Should be

Speaker 1 a title waistband. Yeah.
Not a title belt. All right.
Let's wrap it up. Guys on checks.
Then Friday we have,

Speaker 1 oh,

Speaker 1 we have our favorite. I said O, but it's O.
We have our favorite coach, Coach O, on Friday. Not a big deal.

Speaker 1 Not a big deal.

Speaker 1 Literally, he called in and his voice made us all so happy.

Speaker 1 I don't know if we're going to include this part in the podcast, but when he first picked up before we really started the interview, he just goes, what's up, boss? Yeah. And I was ready to go.

Speaker 1 Holy shit.

Speaker 2 Hi, gang. I got married in March, and my husband and I recently had the biggest argument yet.
It all started when he locked the door to take a dump. Oh.

Speaker 2 Now, I've never tried to come in the bathroom while he's busy in there unless I can hear him actively showering, in which case I go in there to put makeup on or something.

Speaker 2 I stay out of the way and I've never even tried the bathroom door. So a couple weeks ago, when I could hear him in the shower, I tried to come in for my hairbrush, and the door was locked.

Speaker 2 Apparently, he's been locking the door every time he poops, then unlocking it before he showers. So, I've never even known he locks it since I don't try the door unless I hear the shower.

Speaker 2 I think it's really weird that he locks the door in our own house, especially since no one else is ever around.

Speaker 2 And it almost hurts my feelings that he doesn't trust me not to interrupt, but he says he's just being polite.

Speaker 6 Who is right?

Speaker 2 Should he lock the door?

Speaker 1 He's right, he's right, you're wrong. He's jerking off, too.
Yeah, there's that, and there's also

Speaker 1 he's making sure that you don't make any unwanted mistakes yeah he's saving you from yourself he's actually very like no he is like you don't want to see what goes on there when he jerks off onto his shit yeah he's probably cranking it from the back right like underneath his walling him himself yeah so you don't trust me you don't want to see i don't know if you've seen the intro to uh this year's episode of mindhunter um but locking a bathroom door can actually save a lot when it comes to he's probably wearing a clown mask yeah and tying his neck up to the door with a tie.

Speaker 1 Yeah, so yeah, don't go in. That's just, listen, a guy doesn't have a lot of safe spaces.

Speaker 1 Podcast is one of them.

Speaker 1 Bars on Sundays. Our man caves.
Our man caveases

Speaker 1 with a big wrestling belt that we stole hanging up in it. Yeah, and locking the door when you have to shit, jerk off, and shower.
That's it. We don't ask for much.

Speaker 1 I had a roommate in college that used to lock his bedroom door every time he would shower because he didn't trust one of my roommates. That was my friend, because my roommate just got out of jail.

Speaker 1 No big deal. Long story.
Oh, wow.

Speaker 1 But

Speaker 1 when he would come out of the bathroom, he'd have to bring his key with him and unlock his door and his towel to get back in his room.

Speaker 1 And one time he forgot his key, and so he was just locked out of his own bedroom in his own house wearing a towel. And then he had to ask my friend, the criminal, to come break the door down for him,

Speaker 1 which he knew how to do. It's really emasculating all around.

Speaker 2 Hey, Hunky Hank, and the boys. boys.

Speaker 2 My boyfriend switched to Keto, and now he sucks to eat with. How do I make him eat like a normal person again?

Speaker 1 Don't you want him to be hot?

Speaker 1 Don't you want him to be hot? That's a good question. I think you just start in with the like,

Speaker 1 I love you the way you are. Or just honestly, as someone who right now is going no carb life, just put enough pizza in the fridge.

Speaker 1 He'll like, if I come home tonight and there's pizza in the fridge, I'm eating it. Like, I am.
So just do that. Just really submarine his efforts to better himself.
That's true love.

Speaker 1 Also, if you just say that whatever, like, kind of dough that you're serving on the pizza or any sort of, like, carb-like substance is made from cauliflower, he'll just eat it and he won't know. Yeah.

Speaker 1 So just be like, hey, it's cauliflower. I'll be like, oh, this isn't that bad.
Frozen yogurt. Just get a lot of frozen yogurt.
If I see frozen yogurt, I eat it.

Speaker 1 I had three ice cream cones on Saturday. I just wanted to get that out there.
That's pretty sick. Yeah.
Wait, wait, did you have to walk to the ice cream stand three separate times?

Speaker 1 I got one at like noon. I got one at like, no, no, true ice cream.
Like there's ice cream trucks. And

Speaker 1 so you were in your apartment and every time you heard the ding ding.

Speaker 1 No, they don't ding ding. They fucking sit down the street.
I was just like, I got to walk Stella. Got to walk Stella.
And I just crush ice cream coats. I like that.
I've been getting into just

Speaker 1 like popsicles in the freezer, but then you eat. eight or nine of them.
I can't say. I can't stand popsicles.
You have to get the right one. That's like, I mean, just go all the way.

Speaker 2 Sup, PMT boys, especially Big Cat and PFT. I was listening to the show today and was amazed with how smart Hank's ideas were to stop the hurricane.

Speaker 2 Did you guys talk to him about how impressive that was off-air?

Speaker 1 Did we? Did I say something? I don't think so. I'm always impressed with hurricane.

Speaker 1 I actually had that on my to-do list today. Tell Hank he's smart.
What were your ideas, Hank? Just like get everybody to fart at it? Yeah.

Speaker 2 When you yell really loudly. Oh,

Speaker 1 naming the hurricane bad things.

Speaker 1 Good things. No, no.
Sponsoring it. Sponsoring it.
Yes, sponsoring. I want to name it Bad Things so everyone would be afraid of it.

Speaker 1 You wanted to bring in like a donation element where you could text the hurricane. Yeah.
And then it would automatically donate. Hurricane Walmart.

Speaker 2 This is actually on the Barcelona Gold episode, but you said today that they should figure out a way to send the hurricane to the Amazon, and that was, I think, the most diverted.

Speaker 1 Why not?

Speaker 1 Build a wall. Yeah, build a wind wall.
Probably shouldn't say that. No, you can't do that.
And

Speaker 1 the Cape Verde Islands are going to pay for it.

Speaker 2 Sup, PMT boys, especially our sweet Prince Liam.

Speaker 1 Ooh. I don't know if you're doing guys on chicks tonight,

Speaker 2 but this is an urgent inquiry. A co-worker of mine just revealed to us that she requires her husband to pee sitting down.

Speaker 1 Every time.

Speaker 1 Not just late night sitting pee.

Speaker 2 Every pee is a sit pee. She even checks the trash can next to the toilet to make sure there are no splatters because she can always tell.

Speaker 1 Yep. That's a fact.
Bad aim.

Speaker 2 Some of the fellows in the office are absolutely appalled and asked for my advice on whether or not it would be over the line to have an intervention for this woman's husband, despite having never spoken to him in their lives.

Speaker 2 As a woman, would that

Speaker 2 never subject her husband to such restrictions? I need to know if taking their side and telling them to intervene would break the girl code.

Speaker 1 First of all,

Speaker 1 I just love the idea that there's just like a group of fellas in the office that are all riled up about some girl that's making your husband pee sitting down, and they're getting like really mad about it as a collective unit.

Speaker 1 Here's the thing: in life,

Speaker 1 there are some people you will come across that just like to be be told what to do.

Speaker 1 And so, to interrupt that, like I guarantee you, this guy probably is like, you know, what I kind of like it when my wife tells me I have to sit down and take a piss.

Speaker 2 Yeah, like when he takes a piece standing up, like he's getting a drilling rush, right?

Speaker 1 Exactly. So, right, right.
So, he, you just got to leave him alone. Like, he probably likes to have, he probably has his sweaters laid out for him by his wife.

Speaker 1 He probably has his dinner plans set for months in advance. He likes order.
He likes someone else telling him what to do. You got to let those people live.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I honestly, like, I wouldn't have a problem being told to. Sometimes it's nice to do.

Speaker 1 If I'm tired in the middle of the night, sometimes I'll sit down to pee, but that's because I choose to do it, so I feel fine about it.

Speaker 1 Being told to sit down and pee all the time feels like something that you would agree to only if there were just a lot of other bigger fish to fry out there for you.

Speaker 1 And he's got shitty aim. I mean, dude,

Speaker 1 if he's hitting the trash can, come on, dude. What are you, like, seven? Also, maybe figure that out.
Maybe she beat him in fantasy football last year and this was a bet that they had.

Speaker 1 That'd be great.

Speaker 2 Great transition. Hey, boys, now that football season is back, it's time to start focusing on my fantasy team.

Speaker 2 I usually use the pickup line to guys, can you help me set my lineup to just start conversation? But I have been getting terrible recommendations in the past seasons.

Speaker 2 How do I tell a football guy from an amateur and what do you think is a fair trade for a guy who gets my team all the way to the playoffs?

Speaker 1 Ooh, I'll tell you what, if you really want your team to succeed, you have to have the the advantage of knowledge, of superior knowledge, and you have to be willing to educate yourself, which is why I listen to the fantasy footballers, and I downloaded.

Speaker 1 That was what this was? I downloaded the

Speaker 1 fantasy life app for Matthew Berry. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Oh, wait, shit, that's not the name of Hank's podcast. I know, I was trolling Hank.
I totally forgot the name of his podcast. The Fantasy Football.

Speaker 1 So Meaningless in My Life. Yeah.

Speaker 2 PFT actually named it, so

Speaker 1 he remembers it. Fantasy Football Fantasy.
I remember us having some different names for it, Hank. We came up with a bunch of them, and Hank.
No, everyone, we have a live draft tomorrow night.

Speaker 1 It's true. Live draft.

Speaker 1 It was just a good question. No, but it was a great segue for us to plug your podcast.

Speaker 2 I appreciate that, but that truly was not why.

Speaker 1 Your success is our success. That is the truth.
It's yours. It's your guys' podcast more than mine.
No, it's not. I don't even get followed by the account.

Speaker 2 That's fucked up. True.
That's true.

Speaker 1 It's fucked up. And the bigger Hank gets at this, the less time he spends with us.
Yeah, right. Everyone download Hank's app.
The more mistakes he makes on this show.

Speaker 1 Perfect. Hank, what time is your draft tomorrow?

Speaker 1 Nobody cares about your fantasy team. Fair enough.
All right. We'll see everyone Friday.
Love you guys.

Speaker 1 to find you shining away.

Speaker 1 I'll be coming for your love, okay.

Speaker 1 I'll be coming for your love, okay.

Speaker 1 Take on me, take

Speaker 1 me

Speaker 1 Stay up to me.

Speaker 1 I'll least the better to be safe and sorry.

Speaker 1 Take my

Speaker 1 for me,

Speaker 1 take on me.