WWE Superstar Nikki Bella, Tony Scheffler and The Mt Rushmore Of Farm Animals

Speaker 1 Hey, pardon my take, listeners.

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Speaker 14 On today's part of my take, we have Mount Rushmore Farm Animals with our good friend Tony Scheffler, old-time recurring guest, good friend of the program, and also one of the most famous videos in barstool history, Tony Scheffler.

Speaker 20 And we also have Nikki Bella, WWE superstar, former WWE superstar.

Speaker 22 Really, really fun interview.

Speaker 11 It was one of those ones we went into.

Speaker 1 We're like, we don't know a lot about Nikki Bella, but we walked out of it being being like, I think we're best friends because this was a ton of fun.

Speaker 14 We have Hot Seat Cool Throne.

Speaker 1 We have Bachelorette Talk for guys that haven't watched The Bachelorette.

Speaker 2 And if you actually have not watched it, by the way, there's spoilers.

Speaker 1 And we have guys on chicks.

Speaker 29 Before we get to all that, when cool, creamy ranch meets tangy, bold buffalo, the hole is greater than the sum of its sauce.

Speaker 29 Say howdy, partner, to new Buffalo Ranch sauce only at McDonald's for a limited time.

Speaker 4 At participating McDonald's.

Speaker 24 Okay,

Speaker 30 let's go.

Speaker 30 Look at the hannah, don't washing.

Speaker 30 And then I can't aim all on the sun. Oh no, we're gonna rock down to

Speaker 30 It's part of my tape presented by Barstool Sports.

Speaker 31 Welcome to Pardon My Tape presented by the Cash App. Go download the Cash App right now.
Put in promo code BarStool.

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Speaker 1 Today is Wednesday, July 31st,

Speaker 15 and I didn't realize there were 31 31 days in July.

Speaker 23 I thought it was 30.

Speaker 4 It's one of those months that sneaks up on you a little bit for sure. It's like 30 days have July.
It should be in there. It's in the middle of summer.
Nobody needs another 95-degree day.

Speaker 33 Wait, is it?

Speaker 30 Is it? Is tomorrow August 1st? No.

Speaker 10 It's not. Okay, all right, yeah.
So today is July 31st.

Speaker 2 I'm ready for August.

Speaker 23 Just get done with July already, but there's nothing better than a late July news story in the sports world that is completely inconsequential, totally exhausting, and yet here we are.

Speaker 1 It's LeBron James AAU watch day three.

Speaker 2 We now have enter into the Coliseum a worthy foe, and that is Jason Whitlock saying that LeBron James is addicted to being a celebrity.

Speaker 1 It's more dangerous than being addicted to cocaine.

Speaker 4 It's very true. I agree 100% with Mr.
Whitlock on this one.

Speaker 4 I would actually say that the worst thing that LeBron James is doing, the proof that he doesn't actually love his kids, is that they're playing basketball and not football.

Speaker 4 Like LeBron James should have been a football player to begin with. He's always kind of taking the coward's way out.

Speaker 4 But the fact that his son is at AAU basketball, yeah, that's a pretty big indictment right there.

Speaker 2 Yeah, this, though, is such a classic case of, you know, a few people made some jokes.

Speaker 20 We had some fun.

Speaker 23 And then, because of the time of year and the down cycle in news, sports stories, everyone's in training camp, but we haven't played any training camp games or preseason games.

Speaker 2 We get essentially everyone has to weigh in.

Speaker 25 Literally, every single person has to weigh in on LeBron James at AAU games.

Speaker 15 And you just look back, you're like, wait, we just, people were just kind of making a couple jokes.

Speaker 1 Like, we don't really have to be this serious about it. We don't have to talk about whether, you know, his merit as a father and how people are going at him for that.

Speaker 18 It's like, we just kind of thought it was a little awkward that he was dunking in a layup line, and that technically is a technical foul if we want to go by the letter of the rules.

Speaker 14 So he's hurting his son's team by assessing a technical foul before the game even starts.

Speaker 4 And he could also break the goal, which is an issue. It's a player safety issue.

Speaker 30 It's all just a good thing. Yeah,

Speaker 4 we could sit here and nitpick all day about this sort of thing.

Speaker 4 But I think if you really want to know the correct take, you can just go back and listen to Monday as part of my take because I think we said everything that needed to be said at the time.

Speaker 30 Yeah, but

Speaker 11 that doesn't mean people aren't going to milk it for a couple more days.

Speaker 24 I guess we're technically doing it right now, but it also shows where we're at because if there were football games going on, this is actually Roger Goodell's fault.

Speaker 26 If we had more football games, if we had a 20-game season, we probably already would have started at all the preseason games.

Speaker 11 We'd be able to talk about that.

Speaker 14 Instead, we're stuck talking about this stupid fucking story that we're all sick of.

Speaker 10 So let's agree to move on.

Speaker 40 Oh, Hank has one last thing.

Speaker 41 I have a quick side note kind of regarding this story.

Speaker 32 It's more about the Fox sports anchors.

Speaker 41 And people, we talked about Nick Wright's hair being real. But the fact that Coward's hair is so ridiculous and now Whitlock's hair is so ridiculous, it does not help Nick Wright's case at all.

Speaker 4 No.

Speaker 41 Like the three of them together is just

Speaker 41 a preposterous-looking cast cast of weird hair.

Speaker 4 Hank, you make a very, very good point, and that's like when you put him side to side with those other two guys, it's tough. It's a tough sell.

Speaker 4 I still stand firmly in the camp that Nick Wright has genuine hair right now. He's just never grown it out until he went on vacation.
But yeah, you're right. It's like if you're looking at

Speaker 4 a group of offensive linemen and two out of the three of them look like they've been jamming steroids up their butt for the last six years, and then one guy is just like really big, you're going to point at that guy and say like, this dude's on steroids, too.

Speaker 31 Correct. All right, enough about Tennessee Titans.

Speaker 11 Let's talk about some football news.

Speaker 20 So, we had the best news that happened in the

Speaker 24 that was a nice little double burn right there.

Speaker 4 Not only the fact of the steroids with the Titans, but also saying, okay, let's stop talking about the Tennessee Titans and instead talk about football.

Speaker 30 Yeah, let's talk about football.

Speaker 40 The biggest news that has come out from training camps so far, there's two big news stories we've got to get to, but the number one news story, John Gruden on backup quarterback battle.

Speaker 23 This Nate Peterman guy is growing on me.

Speaker 44 The greatest news

Speaker 1 I have ever seen.

Speaker 10 This gave me goosebumps in late July, and just a little

Speaker 36 nice trick that John Gruden played there.

Speaker 23 Not Nathan Peterman, Nate Peterman.

Speaker 26 That's a different guy.

Speaker 10 He knows if you change a guy's name like that, he is ready to go.

Speaker 2 We tried to do it with John Manzel.

Speaker 34 Didn't didn't really work.

Speaker 30 Nate Peterman probably still won't work, but I love it.

Speaker 4 Well, we called this a while ago because when he was coming out of college, you'll recall that John Gruden fell in love with the fact that he was able to operate a huddle efficiently.

Speaker 4 He had command presence in the huddle, which is like that's the number one thing that John Gruden looks for. Ultimate looks good in Short Sky.

Speaker 4 You'll remember back in Tampa Bay, he would just, every single offseason, he'd bring in like six over-the-hill quarterbacks that knew how to

Speaker 4 get in and out of a huddle in less than 10 seconds. And as long as you could do that, he'd be like, Yeah, Jake Delome, bring him in.
Jake Plummer, he loved Jake Plummer.

Speaker 4 And that guy could get in and out of the huddle. Now, what he did after he got out of the huddle wasn't so great, but yeah, Gruden added, he went on about Nathan.

Speaker 4 I would actually say, excuse me, Nate, I would say he went on and he gushed about Nate Peterman. He said, he's smart.
He's done a good job. He's been consistent.

Speaker 4 And I think he's starting to get his confidence back.

Speaker 30 So

Speaker 4 a confident Nate Peterman is a great world to be in.

Speaker 48 If we get to see Nate Peterman this year, I will just be the happiest boy in the world.

Speaker 30 That's like all I want.

Speaker 14 All I want is I want to see Nate Peterman get out there and just chuck the ball around, maybe even break his own record.

Speaker 25 Could you imagine how great of a moment that would be if he threw six interceptions in the first half? Was it five?

Speaker 5 Did he throw five?

Speaker 7 I think he threw five, and I think he did it twice.

Speaker 4 So, yeah, he is very consistent.

Speaker 16 It's so bad that you almost don't believe facts when it comes to Nate Peterman.

Speaker 1 Like you say five interceptions in the first half and you say, no, wait,

Speaker 27 that can't be right.

Speaker 21 Like my memory is obviously going here, but no, it is exactly right.

Speaker 23 The other news we had is Jerry Jones versus Ezekiel Elliott is fully on.

Speaker 15 Ezekiel Elliott has gone down to Cabo.

Speaker 1 He's going to hang out there and train.

Speaker 14 And Jerry Jones said you don't have to have a rushing champions to win a Super Bowl.

Speaker 1 Everyone on the internet dunked on Jerry Jones because when the Cowboys won their three Super Bowls, yes, that's right, they had the rushing champion in Emmett Smith, but I'm here to defend Jerry Jones.

Speaker 14 We make fun of him for being stuck in the 90s.

Speaker 19 He's right.

Speaker 45 You do not need a rushing champion to win a Super Bowl in today's NFL.

Speaker 14 So as much as we make fun of him for being like out of touch and holding on to the glories of the 90s, he actually is right here.

Speaker 2 And I think he's actually kind of like evolved enough to realize you should not pay Ezekiel Elliott way too much money.

Speaker 4 Yeah.

Speaker 4 No, we do make fun of Jerry Jones most notably for coming inside of shoes, masturbating into shoes, for talking about Glory Hole, We Need the Glory Hole, Get Me Some Glory Hole, for talking about all sorts of stuff, like circumcising the mosquito.

Speaker 4 Jerry Jones is a

Speaker 4 pretty big part of the NFL and a pretty big part of the NFL

Speaker 4 comedic community, and I will never let that go. But I think he probably is right about Ezekiel Elliott, even though I do think you should pay him.

Speaker 4 I think that he's right in the grand scheme of things. Like, you don't need to have the best running back in the NFL to win a Super Bowl.

Speaker 4 That's definitely true, but I think Ezekiel Elliott is really, really good, and they should pay him. I'm Team Zeke on this one.

Speaker 11 I say,

Speaker 4 go hang out in Cabo with Sammy Hagar and Guy Fieri. Drink your tequila, get a nice little suntan, hang out down there for a while.

Speaker 4 I think they're going to end up paying him, actually, because Jerry Jones is the kind of guy that needs a splash on his team. And right now, his team's pretty boring.
Even Dak.

Speaker 4 Dak is a boring quarterback. Amari Cooper is an awesome wide receiver, but he's also kind of boring.

Speaker 4 Like, I guarantee you Jerry Jones would like Amari Cooper better if he flew into training camp on a hot air balloon.

Speaker 23 But here's, okay, so here's the alternate side.

Speaker 10 Because I'll say that they're going to sign him.

Speaker 14 They will sign him, but I don't think they should.

Speaker 1 I think they should hold firm because as it stands right now, Ezekiel Elliott has one year left on his deal, and then he can obviously be franchised. What is he going to do? Sit out two years?

Speaker 30 That won't happen.

Speaker 21 Like, he can't sit out two years of football and expect to make up that money.

Speaker 2 So, I would just be like, hey, dude, come to camp, play next year, and then maybe deal with it after that.

Speaker 1 Because this is one of those situations where the teams that are successful in the NFL have a plan, and they stick to that plan.

Speaker 2 And what you just said is exactly correct, that Jerry Jones loves a splash.

Speaker 1 But you just have to think, like, could you imagine Bill Belichick being like, well, you know what?

Speaker 2 Like, let's pay him because the fans like him and we need a splash.

Speaker 11 Like, if you have a plan, you stick to the plan and you don't deviate from it and paying a running back an insane amount of money,

Speaker 11 pay him a good salary, that's fine.

Speaker 25 But if you basically pay him so much money that other parts of your team can't be paid, and the line can't be paid, both defensive and offensive, then you're just hurting yourself in the future.

Speaker 4 Just to confirm, we're talking about like whether or not Jerry Jones has a plan. I think Jerry Jones,

Speaker 4 I think he does have a plan. It's just get drunk before noon every day, and then at that point, everyone's got a plan until your liver gets punched in the face, and he will just change his mind.

Speaker 4 At some point during early August, Jerry Jones will get drunk enough that he'll say, fuck it, let's just sign him. Bring that kid up here.
Yeah. Give him the football.

Speaker 5 Yeah, his plan is to just, fuck it, let's have some fun.

Speaker 10 And so he just, really what it is, this contract holdoff out is essentially just waiting for Jerry Jones to get in a good mood.

Speaker 42 Yeah.

Speaker 23 Because as soon as he's in his next good mood, he'll be like, fuck it, let's do it.

Speaker 9 Yeah, let's do it. Let's get all the boys together.

Speaker 4 Ezekiel Elliott's got, he's getting some great advice. Wait till Jerry Jones gets blackout drunk at some point because he's going to make a decision.

Speaker 4 And that's what's going to get the gang back together.

Speaker 15 Slide a contract right under Jerry Jones' nose the minute before he comes in a shoe.

Speaker 18 Here's

Speaker 4 that's that's one great option. Another good one would be, so you're down in Cabo, right? That's Baja, California, I think, right?

Speaker 30 I don't know.

Speaker 4 I don't know anything about geography. But so you're down there, you're just south of Oxford, California.

Speaker 4 Chug half a bottle of Johnny Walker Blue. put a signed contract in there that says three years, $95 million, throw it in the ocean, wait till it gets up to Oxford, Jerry will find it eventually.

Speaker 4 Let's sign a kid. Let's bring this kid up here and go bring three more Glory Holes.

Speaker 14 I don't think that's how tides work.

Speaker 26 I think they go the other way.

Speaker 33 What do you mean, they go out?

Speaker 30 Also,

Speaker 45 no,

Speaker 1 I think if you look at the tidal currents, I think it's going the opposite way, isn't it? Also, Oxnard is inland, right?

Speaker 4 It'll get up to the LA area.

Speaker 11 Okay. And then someone.

Speaker 4 Jerry Jones will sniff out a bottle of Johnny Walker's bottle.

Speaker 30 Yes. All right.

Speaker 24 Should we do our who's back?

Speaker 1 And then we'll get to our Mount Rushmore with Tony Scheffler, which is a very fun Mount Rushmore

Speaker 13 of farm animals.

Speaker 33 Yes.

Speaker 36 And there's a new legend that will be born out of this.

Speaker 18 A certain animal that Tony owns.

Speaker 7 By the way, Hank, remind me I have pictures of that animal.

Speaker 21 We will tweet that out.

Speaker 30 Let's do who's back, though.

Speaker 48 Hank, why don't you start?

Speaker 30 Or, no, sorry, hot seat cool drone.

Speaker 41 Yes. My hot seat is people who think U.S.
soccer is sexist and doesn't pay the women enough. Oh.
Because our good friend D.R. came out with a tweet today where he showed that the women's

Speaker 41 U.S. soccer responded for the first time ever with us with what shows that they're independently audited finances that show that their women players actually earn more than the men.

Speaker 41 So they came with the receipts. They dropped it on the world.

Speaker 41 And, you know, they didn't really like, they could have done this in real time, I guess, but they waited, they got their shit together, and then they came out with, like, a very organized structure to show that, in fact, the women are getting paid more than men.

Speaker 48 And I still am confused whether that's the case because they like muddied the water with the NSWL and all these things.

Speaker 7 This is, we have now reached the peak internet argument where both sides have enough like pseudo facts to arm themselves to say that they are right.

Speaker 4 And I still feel like anyone with a brain is sitting here saying, why don't don't they just release all the fucking money like all the numbers and let us decide because it's so many so many weird things that have been released like well it's the the World Cup pool and it's bigger but the US men's didn't make it and then the US men's don't have guaranteed contract just tell us exactly how much money everyone makes and then tell us the and tell us the percentage that each side makes and let's just do that what you just described was the internet in a nutshell in 2019 which is you're going to believe what you already believed beforehand and come hell or high water you're going to go out there and you're going to find any fact that you could possibly come across to back up your argument.

Speaker 4 And you're going to ignore anything on the other side.

Speaker 4 From what I read, and I could be really way off on this because I'm not a financial expert like Mark Burnell, but what I've seen is that with the women's contract, they're paid by their major league team as well as from the national team.

Speaker 4 The USSL or whatever covers all that money out of their pocket. When it comes to the men, they get a paycheck from the U.S.
national team, and then the MLS team separately pays their paycheck.

Speaker 4 And then

Speaker 4 they both get a share of World Cup appearances, but then the men didn't make the World Cup one year, so the women get more total money from the World Cup because they have another entire year that they were in it, that the guys weren't in it.

Speaker 4 And it's just very, very confusing. I don't know what's going on.
Congratulations, Internet. You've defeated me.
My brain doesn't understand

Speaker 4 what should be a very simple equation because I can't trust any of you.

Speaker 10 Yes, I can't trust.

Speaker 2 I have no idea what the actual numbers are.

Speaker 11 I've heard so many of them, and it feels like one of those situations where no one has a straight answer.

Speaker 10 So just give us the books.

Speaker 2 That's what I'm going to say.

Speaker 23 Instead of the, what's the chant they were doing?

Speaker 3 I believe that we will

Speaker 30 not that one. The other one.
We will win. The other one.
The pay.

Speaker 30 Fair pay.

Speaker 30 No, fuck you guys.

Speaker 6 Fair pay or pay them more or something.

Speaker 2 Pay them equal. Something, whatever.

Speaker 24 I just want to USA.

Speaker 30 We just need a chance. Release the documents.

Speaker 30 Release the documents. Release all.
Release all the documents right here. I've been pulling through them.

Speaker 30 Release them.

Speaker 4 I don't even know if that would make a difference because then the documents would get out and then the first three people that would speed read through them would write about them and proving their own point.

Speaker 4 So then it would just be like an even bigger of a mess. I say just take away the United States Soccer Federation entirely and just have them both go on Patreon.

Speaker 30 Or

Speaker 12 here's an alternate one.

Speaker 36 We can have pick someone who thinks it's unfair, someone who thinks it's fair, have them read the documents, have them both just write a headline, because let's be honest, that's all we're ever going to read.

Speaker 2 We're not going to read the article, and then best headline wins, and then whatever happens from that.

Speaker 42 So, if the pay them more wins headline, or it's already equal headline, whichever wins will then just go from there.

Speaker 30 It's a headline off.

Speaker 41 Yeah, I agree to that.

Speaker 30 Yeah.

Speaker 30 Hank, what's your cool throne?

Speaker 41 My cool throne is Lil Nas X.

Speaker 7 Yeah.

Speaker 41 So he is officially has the longest running number one single ever.

Speaker 3 17 weeks in a row.

Speaker 41 No, period. Billboard charts, all time.

Speaker 15 But the country doesn't let him on him, right?

Speaker 41 That was

Speaker 41 the beginning of this whole thing. That was like the country things wouldn't let him on them.
And then he did the remix with Billy Ray.

Speaker 30 No, he did the remix with

Speaker 14 Mason Ramsey.

Speaker 30 Dolly Parton.

Speaker 41 So he passed Mariah Carey and Boys to Men with a song that was called One Sweet Day, which I don't even know.

Speaker 4 Are you serious? With a song that was called One Sweet Day? Yeah, there was a song called One Sweet Day.

Speaker 4 A lot of us. This is a song.
We lost our handjob virginity to that song, Hank. Boys to Men.

Speaker 30 Does some respect?

Speaker 14 All right, so

Speaker 1 he's got the record.

Speaker 30 Got the record.

Speaker 1 I mean, does that equal dollar figures?

Speaker 30 A lot.

Speaker 1 I mean, how much are we talking?

Speaker 30 Boatload?

Speaker 41 Seven figs. Truckload? I mean, definitely seven figs.

Speaker 30 House load?

Speaker 4 Seven figs. I mean, I would hope seven figs.
Maybe eight.

Speaker 20 Here's the thing. That's all I care about.

Speaker 4 In the streaming economy, What does Spotify pay? Like 0.005 cents a song, something like that, per stream? So he probably hasn't made like a shitload of money off of it yet.

Speaker 4 But the best thing that ever happened to him was

Speaker 4 when, well, off like merch and tour and stuff like that. But the best thing that happened was when the country charts didn't let him on at the start.
Got a lot of buzz going.

Speaker 4 So for our next single that we put out, like let's say Chunk 2 or whatever, we'll just make a big announcement at the start. Like they won't include Sonny Digital and

Speaker 4 collaboration on the country music charts, and it's fucked up. And we'll see if we can get a little extra buzz off that because some articles are written.

Speaker 1 Yeah, and we'll be like, Yeah, it's not even a country song. We're just wearing cowboy hats

Speaker 27 and drinking Jim Beam.

Speaker 33 So it should count.

Speaker 11 Is that it, Hank? That's it.

Speaker 3 Okay, PFT, what do you got?

Speaker 4 Well, first of all, I got some breaking news real quick. I'm going to speak a little bit quietly.

Speaker 36 Breaking news.

Speaker 4 Bubba's asleep.

Speaker 4 Because Bubba's asleep right now. He's in the room.

Speaker 3 I heard you snoring, Bubba.

Speaker 44 I heard Bubba snoring. Hang on, wait.
Bubba, would you like to respond?

Speaker 30 Bubba, I heard a snore.

Speaker 41 I'm looking right at PFT right now, listening to the Zoo report.

Speaker 10 Were your eyes open?

Speaker 4 He wants to know if your eyes were open the whole time.

Speaker 30 Yes.

Speaker 4 I heard a snore.

Speaker 30 I heard a snore.

Speaker 44 Bubba has been awesome.

Speaker 4 So I'm on the road right now. I'm in Detroit, Michigan for the debates.
Interviewed John Hickenlooper. We're interviewing Tim Ryan tomorrow.
Bubba's been working very hard, and he's not asleep.

Speaker 4 I want it to be known for the record that he was not asleep.

Speaker 30 What are the polls?

Speaker 47 Weird Detroit hotel room.

Speaker 30 And there's one of the things that we're doing. Oh, Bobby Gusting, take on me for Friday.
So I'm sitting on PFT's bed.

Speaker 30 Okay. He's sitting in a very comfortable place.

Speaker 4 So, yeah. My hot seat, I'll get into that, is

Speaker 4 the Los Angeles Clippers. are on my hot seat.
Okay. Because Steve Ballmer said that he would change the name.
He would consider changing the name of the team if a good one popped up.

Speaker 4 So he's looking at this time in the history of the Los Angeles Clippers as being like the big watershed moment, the big transformative season because they finally have some good players besides when they were Lob City when they had Blake Griffin.

Speaker 4 But yeah, he's saying he'd be open to changing it if he came up with some good names or somebody hit him with one.

Speaker 4 So I say, let's do it. What better time than now?

Speaker 7 Yeah, I'm in. I'm in.

Speaker 36 I mean, you should just call it the Los Angeles Ball.

Speaker 23 Do you think there will ever be a team where they just name it after the owner?

Speaker 21 That would be sick.

Speaker 48 The governor?

Speaker 52 I don't know. Probably not.

Speaker 3 The governor.

Speaker 4 I don't think so. The Los Angeles Redskins.

Speaker 10 The Los Angeles Governors.

Speaker 30 I like that.

Speaker 17 Ooh, Los Angeles owners.

Speaker 21 And then we can have a whole debate whether we're allowed to say their name or not.

Speaker 4 Yeah, the O-Words.

Speaker 4 Or they could do

Speaker 4 what the Raptors did back in 1994 or whatever, and just name your team after whatever pop culture phenomenon. The Los Angeles Lil Nas X's.
Perfect.

Speaker 40 Perfect. The Los Angeles, the Los Angeles Vapors.

Speaker 4 Los Angeles Old Town Road. The Los Angeles Thanos.

Speaker 41 The Los Angeles Clouds is not bad.

Speaker 30 The Los Angeles Clouds, the Los Angeles Dabbers.

Speaker 4 The LA Clouds would be sick.

Speaker 28 Yeah, the LA Clouds. The LA Batman.

Speaker 30 The LA Smog.

Speaker 15 What about the LA Smog?

Speaker 3 That would be a great name.

Speaker 41 And that's going to be like the defense. It's going to be all over you.

Speaker 30 Yeah.

Speaker 33 That would be good.

Speaker 42 Or the LA Earthquakes.

Speaker 4 That would be good too. That'll be one of those good names until the quake actually happens.
And it's like, wow, shit.

Speaker 4 Probably shouldn't have named our team after a video game.

Speaker 17 Yeah, that was stupid.

Speaker 11 All right, what's your cool throne?

Speaker 4 My cool throne is Ryan Fitzpatrick. So Ryan Fitzpatrick is in the catbird seat.
He has been named by Miami head coach Brian Flores as being the presumptive starter.

Speaker 4 So it's his job to lose the starting job in Miami after six weeks, which he will.

Speaker 4 But he is leapfrogged Josh Rosen on the depth chart. And I'm just, I, for one, am very excited that we are, we're definitely going to have Fitzmagic, at least in September.

Speaker 44 Yes.

Speaker 36 Yes.

Speaker 14 That's going to be not good for their tanking.

Speaker 1 They want Tua, and we've talked about it, but Ryan Fitzpatrick is always good for a few wins out of nowhere.

Speaker 17 So if you want to tank, don't have Ryan Fitzpatrick be your quarterback.

Speaker 16 But Brian Flores is going for it.

Speaker 14 All right, my hot seat is Madden codes.

Speaker 48 So

Speaker 2 Madden, the new Madden's coming out, and everyone wants their code.

Speaker 1 I guess they give it to like influencers. So everyone basically just goes around the internet for the next week saying, Yo, can I get a Madden code?

Speaker 7 Yo, can I get a Madden code?

Speaker 11 So we love our AWLs, and I have two Madden codes to give out.

Speaker 14 So the first one is 6259BG86.

Speaker 4 So plug that in.

Speaker 13 The next one is 039658GJ, G,

Speaker 23 J, as in Janine,

Speaker 19 Q,

Speaker 30 4,

Speaker 4 6, 7. Okay, Liam just got that.

Speaker 17 Those are our two Madden codes we just gave out to the pardon my take listeners.

Speaker 11 You guys can go have fun, dominate Madden on us, use that code, and give us a shout-out when you put that code in, and it works.

Speaker 7 Okay?

Speaker 40 All right, my cool throne is the Mets, because the Mets are

Speaker 1 being very Mets-like, and I love it when a team does exactly what you expect from from them, and by that I mean having no plan whatsoever.

Speaker 1 So, everyone, rightfully so, the Mets fans are saying, Why are we trading for Marcus Strowman?

Speaker 15 And then trading Noah Syndegaard, are we going for it, but not going for it?

Speaker 2 And why didn't we do this last year?

Speaker 11 And all these things, and they all are fair questions, but I love when the Mets have no plan but pretend they have a plan because that's what you can rely on. So, when you look at it from afar,

Speaker 16 their plan's working perfectly.

Speaker 13 Their no plan plan is a perfect plan for the Mets.

Speaker 6 Right.

Speaker 4 Their plan is like a hungover Jerry Jones as opposed to a drunk one. Where that moment in the morning where you're waking up, you're still kind of foggy, not making any correct decisions.

Speaker 4 Nothing that you're saying is informed or rational. You just are hoping to get from that point until bedtime later on that night, still alive.

Speaker 4 That's how the Mets run their team. So that is a plan.

Speaker 11 Yes, the no-plan plan.

Speaker 14 So I love what the Mets are doing.

Speaker 9 Okay, let's get to our Mount Rushmore.

Speaker 14 We were out in Michigan on Monday, and we had our good old friend Tony Scheffler on the show.

Speaker 13 Mount Rushmore of Farm Animals.

Speaker 2 He's actually one of the most...

Speaker 1 What was the date, Hank, that he first appeared on the show?

Speaker 41 April 22nd, 2016.

Speaker 5 So that means that Tony Scheffler was probably one of the first 15 guests ever on part of my take.

Speaker 1 So shout out, Tony. He's the best.

Speaker 14 Before we get to Tony Scheffler, if you want to watch our interview with Tony Scheffler and our interview with Nikki Bella, go download barstoolgold.com slash PMT right now.

Speaker 14 BarstoolGold.com slash PMT.

Speaker 16 You can watch all of our interviews, all of our shows.

Speaker 32 Check it out.

Speaker 1 BarstoolGold.com slash PMT. Okay, here's the Mount Rushmore.

Speaker 21 Okay, time for our Mount Rushmore, and we have a very special guest. We alluded to it.
One of the first, probably 10 part of my take guests of all time.

Speaker 21 Tony Scheffler, former Detroit Lion, former Denver Bronco, former loser of the great Dave and Big Cat versus Tony two-on-one basketball game.

Speaker 49 The original bro show.

Speaker 24 The original bro show.

Speaker 49 Fat Dave, skinny cat.

Speaker 30 Yes. Times were weird.

Speaker 21 Okay, let's before we do the Mount Rushmore, how many times in a month does that get mentioned to you?

Speaker 49 That video, that whole scene ruined my life, actually.

Speaker 49 So if you go to YouTube and put my name in, that's what you see first off.

Speaker 15 Played, what, seven years?

Speaker 49 Almost 400,000 views. Um, eight years in the NFL.

Speaker 54 Here's what we have to do: we have to get

Speaker 4 we have to have like an award-winning listener put together a Tony Schuffler actual NFL highlight tape, yes, just to try to get that SEO back to the top.

Speaker 4 Then in the middle, then in the middle, the highlight tape cut to you getting dunked on by Dave and Big Cat.

Speaker 49 There's some highlight

Speaker 49 compilations on there of me. Those have about three, four thousand views.

Speaker 49 The 2-1, high-low,

Speaker 49 death, slow death, 400,000 views.

Speaker 49 So now when these, I'm coaching youth softball, that sort of thing, these youngsters, you know, they, they find out their coach played, their old coach played in the NFL, and they go to the YouTube, and that's what they see.

Speaker 49 So it's been a problem.

Speaker 30 And I've alluded to it before that.

Speaker 49 I'm pretty sure it ended my career. When the Lions saw that video,

Speaker 49 it pretty much ended me. I hurt my thumb in that game.
Yeah. And what people don't know is Training Camp was like two days later.

Speaker 30 The start of training camp.

Speaker 32 No, no, no.

Speaker 23 No, it was the start of the season was two days later.

Speaker 55 Oh, the season.

Speaker 24 Yeah, yeah, yeah. It was like right before Labor Day.

Speaker 49 So I went into the season with a taped-up thumb, a banged-up thumb from that game. I jammed my thumb.

Speaker 49 You guys cheated me.

Speaker 49 It's so deep.

Speaker 49 There's so many things that

Speaker 49 you can peel back that onion.

Speaker 30 It's scoring was scoring. I mean,

Speaker 49 in the comments,

Speaker 49 we found out later on,

Speaker 49 weeks later, that theories, the award-winning listeners found out that I got cheated on the floor. But listen, I didn't know Dave was going to call 46 timeouts.

Speaker 30 He's going into it.

Speaker 9 He got out of breath.

Speaker 30 He had to catch his breath.

Speaker 4 It's a player safety issue.

Speaker 49 He called a timeout.

Speaker 30 I was mid-layup.

Speaker 49 And he's 10 feet off the play. His shoe had fallen off.
He called a timeout as the ball was in the air.

Speaker 30 It's a safety hazard.

Speaker 44 Yeah, exactly. It's load management.

Speaker 49 And we know I was up 10-6 in that game, and that one bucket wins me the game.

Speaker 44 That's good coaching.

Speaker 11 That's a great timeout call.

Speaker 4 Now, it would be a real shame if you were to get your ass kicked in a Mount Rushmore by us again, like that to be your second biggest video.

Speaker 49 I don't plan on

Speaker 49 getting out done today. I don't plan on this is your Mountains.
You're on my turf. We're in the backyard.
I mean, we played the hoop game right here, right across the pond here at my house.

Speaker 21 And we, you know, we obviously are good friends, and we talk pretty much daily, but every now and then, like once a month, you'll text me and be like, I was going to a sports authority or I was getting coffee and the like shithead 17-year-old behind the counter was like, hey, what happened against Big Cat and Dave?

Speaker 49 It's never about the ball anymore. It's never about ball.

Speaker 30 It's never about football. It's never about the NFL.

Speaker 49 It's always about that high-low. People, how could you get high-lowed by those boys?

Speaker 49 I mean, Dave got hot. He was hitting jumpers.

Speaker 6 He was. He was getting really hot.

Speaker 49 With that two-handed push-shot. I mean, the whole thing is just so gross.
It's not okay.

Speaker 30 It doesn't sound like that.

Speaker 21 The best was when you went to, right when you were about to retire, you went to, I think it was like a Redskins

Speaker 46 workout.

Speaker 21 And the kid who picked you up from the airport, you told me like the 30-minute drive, that's all he talked about was that

Speaker 30 right?

Speaker 49 Yeah, like that's what I'm coming in, you know, that's what they're seeing in me. Like you guys ended my career.

Speaker 53 I want you to know that.

Speaker 30 And

Speaker 49 hey, every time you guys see yourself, every time you guys have an interview and then something goes bad, you know I'm the first one to jump on barstool curse.

Speaker 48 Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Speaker 49 I think I was one of the original barstool curses, yes, yeah, yeah.

Speaker 37 But you're doing well.

Speaker 49 And you have, you know, just trying to trying to claw my way back, you know?

Speaker 30 Yeah, you guys really dug a hole for me there on that video. You're coaching, you have a cattle ranch.

Speaker 37 Yeah.

Speaker 24 You're living a good life in Michigan.

Speaker 21 So slow, yeah. Yeah, so let's do Mount Rushmore of Farm Animals in honor of your cattle ranch and your farm.

Speaker 35 We don't know what.

Speaker 48 We literally were just googling farm animals.

Speaker 30 Yeah, that's a big city.

Speaker 30 Yeah.

Speaker 3 Well, I mean, what are we going to do?

Speaker 49 You guys do this for a living, so you're familiar with improvising,

Speaker 49 thinking on the fly. Correct.
So I've got a set list coming from my farm that I'm real comfortable with. But, you know,

Speaker 49 if you guys scoop one of those up or two, then it might get weird.

Speaker 4 But here's the thing. Like, a lot of times what Hank likes to do is not necessarily use the picks that he likes the most, but he picks picks that he knows the audience will like.

Speaker 4 He panders to the audience. So just

Speaker 4 letting you know that just because you like a certain animal, you might want to take into account like what would Hank's idea of listener?

Speaker 30 So do I pick? We're in a tough spot right now in our Mount Rushmore.

Speaker 47 We've just got a false claim.

Speaker 30 PFC has been triggered for like a week and a half.

Speaker 30 He's been triggered

Speaker 30 by picking on me. No, I'm comfortable with my Mount Rushmore.

Speaker 4 I can look myself in the eye at the end of every Mount Rushman.

Speaker 15 Maybe

Speaker 30 he's been triggered for a week now.

Speaker 44 No, I'm not triggered at all.

Speaker 4 I'm not triggered.

Speaker 30 There isn't Kirk Cousins.

Speaker 4 No, which was right. Right up in the car, right?

Speaker 30 He made a great pick.

Speaker 2 And then accused everyone else of bringing it up.

Speaker 30 Tony, let me ask you.

Speaker 4 Kirk Cousins, do you think he's like a perfectly average quarterback in the NFL?

Speaker 49 I'd say step below that.

Speaker 30 Oh, step below even. So there you go.
So long easily. He's around average.

Speaker 45 All right.

Speaker 30 He's out to average

Speaker 53 farm animals.

Speaker 30 Okay. You ready to go?

Speaker 49 I am. I mean, I feel like if I'm the first pick, I feel like I should state the obvious right away.

Speaker 30 Okay.

Speaker 30 Which is?

Speaker 30 We don't know what the obvious is. Which would be the goat.
Okay. Oh, yeah.
All right. That makes sense.
The first goat. I was like, is he going to say rabbit?

Speaker 49 No, I mean,

Speaker 49 a lot of reasons.

Speaker 49 I'm thinking logically,

Speaker 49 how much they eat,

Speaker 49 the reproduction, the price per pound coming from the farm.

Speaker 49 There's a lot of variables. But the first domesticated animal on Earth.
And it is the goat.

Speaker 55 It was the goat, one, one.

Speaker 49 I mean, you know.

Speaker 41 Who decided the goat was the goat?

Speaker 37 The goat is the goat. It's quite obvious.

Speaker 49 I'm probably going to get some burns down in the comments for picking the goat right off the bottom.

Speaker 30 No, don't worry. No, that's the only one that worries.

Speaker 30 Everyone reads the comments. I mean, come on.

Speaker 45 It is.

Speaker 21 Yeah, he's the only one who worries, so you're fine.

Speaker 30 I really don't worry. I got control.
I totally don't worry.

Speaker 4 As long as you're comfortable with it.

Speaker 30 It doesn't matter. Don't worry.

Speaker 30 I figured it was going to get picked.

Speaker 49 It's good pick. It's the most obvious.
Yeah. Right out the gate.
It's an easy, you know, easy introduction to this for you guys. Yeah.
I plan on

Speaker 49 winning this thing, but I got a goat at the farm. The thing is a great swimmer.
Did you guys know what goats are great swimmers?

Speaker 30 I have no idea.

Speaker 30 So wrap your head around this.

Speaker 49 I mean, you walk onto the farm. You know, I got the in-ground pool in the back, right?

Speaker 49 You walk around not a big deal not a big no big you know MED you walk around the corner there and there's a goat swimming in the pool what what's what are you thinking that's pretty cool please don't shit in the pool right yeah did you know goats could swim no they had no idea there you go so that's they're really smart

Speaker 47 That's good. They've got good eyes, too.

Speaker 4 I like the shape of a goat's eyes.

Speaker 49 Don't eat a whole lot.

Speaker 41 Faithy goats are fucking hilarious.

Speaker 30 Yeah, faithy goats are very funny.

Speaker 4 When they spring up, when the baby goats just jump straight up in the air, that's cool, too. Yeah, so I'm going to go.

Speaker 30 Great pick

Speaker 30 All right, Hank, you're up.

Speaker 3 All right, that's a good pick. That's a good pick.

Speaker 3 The cow.

Speaker 30 Yeah, the cow's a good pick. All right.
Is it, though? The cow's a good pick. Oh,

Speaker 3 what do you mean?

Speaker 30 Stop? No, no, no.

Speaker 41 That provides food for your family. Like, isn't that one of the most important parts of a farm? Is providing for your family?

Speaker 30 My kids are lactose intolerant. Oh, didn't think about that, Hank.
All right.

Speaker 3 I'll go with.

Speaker 30 I'll go with pigs.

Speaker 28 I'll go with pigs.

Speaker 17 You go to a farm, you hear the pigs oinking.

Speaker 53 Also, everyone loves pork. everyone loves bacon.
Whoa, what?

Speaker 41 Oh, so you love the animal or do you love the food?

Speaker 30 Well, no, some religions.

Speaker 2 The whole thing works together.

Speaker 4 It's kind of religiously intolerant.

Speaker 21 The cow doesn't do anything if it's not milk and meat.

Speaker 30 Well, yeah, but it's just milk.

Speaker 41 You can have a cow and not kill it.

Speaker 30 Yeah, but it just produces stuff.

Speaker 53 Yeah, but vegans, dude, don't even do that.

Speaker 30 All right, pig.

Speaker 52 All right, pig.

Speaker 4 I actually don't mind the pig as a choice. That's a good first choice.

Speaker 4 My first pick, I'm going to go with horses. Okay.
Got the the horses in the back. You can ride around on them.

Speaker 30 They're just cool.

Speaker 30 Yeah.

Speaker 51 Yeah,

Speaker 30 the first car is a noble horse.

Speaker 4 For my second pick, I'm going to go with

Speaker 4 chickens.

Speaker 30 Love the cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck.

Speaker 4 I like the sound of the wings rustling. Love eating chicken wings.
Love eating chicken. And a rooster crow is kind of a cool sound, too.

Speaker 30 Whoa.

Speaker 41 Chicken's different than a rooster, right?

Speaker 4 It's the same.

Speaker 49 I'm over here on pins and needles wondering the same thing.

Speaker 21 You think it's a male chicken?

Speaker 4 It's a male chicken.

Speaker 52 It's a cock?

Speaker 4 Yeah. A rooster is a male.

Speaker 41 I defer to Tony.

Speaker 4 A rooster is a male chicken.

Speaker 41 We're talking farm animals here.

Speaker 30 Yes.

Speaker 41 So that's where the roosters are. That's where the chickens are.

Speaker 4 They both exist on the farm.

Speaker 49 The rooster may have been next on my list.

Speaker 55 So

Speaker 30 we need to get an official ruling here on

Speaker 30 that situation.

Speaker 3 Let's split them up.

Speaker 46 Let's split them up so we get more picks.

Speaker 30 You have chickens.

Speaker 49 Don't.

Speaker 49 I mean, yeah, you're going to have to.

Speaker 30 Seriously, PFT.

Speaker 21 It's not a big deal.

Speaker 4 Very upset.

Speaker 42 We know.

Speaker 53 All right.

Speaker 49 Two very different things, though.

Speaker 30 I'll go with.

Speaker 6 Is the goat the same as a sheep?

Speaker 3 No, absolutely not. All right, I'll take the sheep.

Speaker 30 Is that a serious question? I don't fucking know, dude. I don't know any of these things.

Speaker 49 You guys have been in New York far too long.

Speaker 30 Wait, is it

Speaker 4 a goat is a male sheep, though, right?

Speaker 30 I think they're different. Oh, a ram is a male.
Male sheep. Yeah, a sheep.
All right, so I'll take sheep. Give you fucking wool.
I don't know what else they do.

Speaker 44 Yeah, just bat.

Speaker 30 Bat.

Speaker 35 Hurt them. You can hurt them.
Yeah.

Speaker 4 They have a lot of opinions about lions.

Speaker 30 Yeah, yeah. Okay.

Speaker 41 I had sheep, too. Fuck.

Speaker 41 I'll go with the llama.

Speaker 30 Wow, that's good fun.

Speaker 41 Very fun farm animal. Yeah.

Speaker 47 Yeah, just cool.

Speaker 30 Just cool to see.

Speaker 4 That is fun. They're spitters, though.

Speaker 15 That is fun. Okay.

Speaker 4 Spitters or quitters.

Speaker 49 I'm going to go with two.

Speaker 48 You have two picks.

Speaker 49 Okay, two picks. I'm going to go with the rooster.
Okay. That was high on my list.
Good pick.

Speaker 30 Yep.

Speaker 49 For a lot of reasons. You know, first thing moving.
Yeah.

Speaker 30 Alarm clock. Cock-doodle-doo.
Alarm clock.

Speaker 49 All the hens, you know.

Speaker 4 Flashy.

Speaker 55 Yeah. Big, bold, beautiful.

Speaker 30 Did you know? Cock of the walk.

Speaker 49 Cock of the walk. Yes.

Speaker 49 Rooster in the hen house. Yeah.

Speaker 49 Closest living relative to the T-Rex.

Speaker 32 Ooh, yes, I did know that.

Speaker 37 Did we know that? Yes.

Speaker 47 The rooster. Yes.
I did know that.

Speaker 37 Indeed.

Speaker 4 Do you think that T-Rex has had feathers?

Speaker 19 I do.

Speaker 49 There's a lot of controversy on that. My son is six and he's a hardcore dino guy.

Speaker 30 He's getting a little bit more.

Speaker 49 He is of the opinion that they did have some feathers, but scientists can't prove it.

Speaker 42 This is good fact-checking.

Speaker 30 Scientists can't prove it.

Speaker 4 I like to, I just imagine my T-Rex is just no feathers, just bald.

Speaker 4 It's concerning to me to imagine like a T-Rex with a little wattle hanging from his neck.

Speaker 21 It's crazy to think about dinosaurs, not to get too like, whoa, but how we've envisioned dinosaurs is what we see on the movies when it's like they could be totally different.

Speaker 49 We were just in Chicago. They had the biggest T-Rex

Speaker 49 ever found there. Yes.
Pretty impressive.

Speaker 48 Yeah, dinosaurs could meow like cats.

Speaker 48 That's too weird.

Speaker 5 Okay, yeah, that is too weird.

Speaker 21 All right, you have another pick.

Speaker 49 So this is number three, huh? I'm going to go with

Speaker 49 the Muscovy duck.

Speaker 30 Whoa. Yes.

Speaker 4 Good choice.

Speaker 49 Just an interesting-looking creature, large, oversized.

Speaker 30 Quackless. Quackless.
Yeah. Quackless duck.

Speaker 49 You know, living on a farm, there's noises everywhere. So any animal you can get that's quiet is a good thing.

Speaker 49 I've got cows that are bulls that are pretty loud and goats that, you know, so list goes on.

Speaker 4 And they're tasty, too.

Speaker 49 Yeah, tasty. A lot of reasons.

Speaker 49 They eat mice.

Speaker 37 They're mean.

Speaker 30 Ducks. Timothy mice?

Speaker 49 All right, big Muscovy ducks. And they have like 30, you know, if you let the hens hatch out their eggs, it's like 30 at a time.
That's a pretty cool thing. You see a hen walk up with 30 babies.

Speaker 49 That's crazy. Pretty cool thing.
That is.

Speaker 30 All the ducklings.

Speaker 49 I'm going to go Muscovy duck.

Speaker 30 Okay. Very specific.

Speaker 4 Have you ever been around for the hatching of a duck and they get imprinted on you?

Speaker 49 No, I haven't. I've heard of that type of thing.

Speaker 45 How sad is it when all the animals die?

Speaker 49 Life on the farm is pretty morbid, yeah.

Speaker 49 But it kind of prepares you for how tough life is, I guess.

Speaker 30 Okay.

Speaker 49 That's good. Things die, yeah, for sure on the farm.
Yeah.

Speaker 30 I just thought of that.

Speaker 21 Like all these animals mean all these animals have to die.

Speaker 4 At what point does a pig become a a hog and you have to slaughter it?

Speaker 49 I'm not a big pig guy.

Speaker 3 Okay.

Speaker 44 Shots fired a pig.

Speaker 49 It depends if they're breeder pigs or they're raised to go to market.

Speaker 49 Under a year.

Speaker 30 Okay.

Speaker 49 Most of that stuff is 10, somewhere out, 10 months, somewhere on there.

Speaker 53 All right, let's not think about this too much.

Speaker 30 All right, well, Hank.

Speaker 41 I will go with Charlotte from Charlotte's Web.

Speaker 53 Good one.

Speaker 41 Greatest farm animal of all time. Yeah.
Put the whole team in her back.

Speaker 30 Yeah. Spider.
Super.

Speaker 30 All right.

Speaker 30 How about, you could tell me if this is wrong, Tony, but a working dog.

Speaker 49 Working dog is

Speaker 12 needed on a farm.

Speaker 49 There's a must. I have not had one yet, but I've seen them in action.

Speaker 35 Herding dogs.

Speaker 30 Oh, my goodness. Herding dogs orphans.

Speaker 24 Well, no, just like a dog.

Speaker 30 You're not getting a choice for a farm.

Speaker 45 You're getting a good, yeah, working dog.

Speaker 48 Or like some of the labs are good dogs.

Speaker 30 Retrievers.

Speaker 4 Especially like Australian cattle dogs.

Speaker 30 Yeah, 100%.

Speaker 55 Blue healers.

Speaker 42 Retrievers, good for hunting.

Speaker 49 Cows are really dumb. Yeah.
And those dogs can whip them right around.

Speaker 30 Yeah, Border Collie.

Speaker 30 Super important.

Speaker 4 I had Border Collie as my next pick, so good pick, big cat.

Speaker 1 Hey, thanks.

Speaker 4 So go to Call and Audible on this one.

Speaker 36 I'm going to go with

Speaker 4 for my next one, a mule.

Speaker 30 A nice mule.

Speaker 4 They're good working animals.

Speaker 4 They're tremendous.

Speaker 4 Tremendous leapers.

Speaker 52 I don't know if you know that, but yeah.

Speaker 4 My aunt owns two mules and they're nice. They're very cute.
Vinny and

Speaker 4 Vinny, too. Yeah,

Speaker 4 there's mule jumping competitions in West Virginia that you can go to. Okay.
Which is basically an excuse to drink moonshine and then forget about your mule.

Speaker 4 And then my last one, this might be controversial. I'm going with bees.

Speaker 4 They're actually the most important animal that you can have. And when they're dying at an alarming rate, then all the other plants and animals in the ecosystem,

Speaker 4 they face those like a rapid decline in population once the bees are gone.

Speaker 30 Okay.

Speaker 53 My last pick, I'm going to go with an ox.

Speaker 12 Strong like an ox.

Speaker 35 Strongest animal there is.

Speaker 30 Never seen it. History of the world.

Speaker 49 Never seen one on a farm.

Speaker 30 Well, they are a farm animal.

Speaker 3 I googled it.

Speaker 21 I said, I googled farm animals, and there were somewhere on that list, an ox.

Speaker 49 Like in a different country?

Speaker 31 No, dude. They're fucking ox.

Speaker 16 They're stronger horses.

Speaker 30 They're a horse than a horse. No, they're not.

Speaker 4 They're like cows.

Speaker 48 No, but they're strong.

Speaker 30 They pull carts and shit.

Speaker 15 They do the same work as a horse.

Speaker 30 They pull the

Speaker 30 horse. No, no, yeah.

Speaker 28 They pull the sled. Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 4 It's more common, I think, over in like China. There's a lot of oxen in China.

Speaker 30 Wherever it may be, there's a farm right now.

Speaker 21 That ox is like, what's up?

Speaker 49 Not in America.

Speaker 21 Well, no, there's ox farms in America. Is there?

Speaker 30 I'm sure you could Google it.

Speaker 30 I don't fucking know.

Speaker 30 This is a hard Mount Rushmore.

Speaker 4 Ox is just a good name, I think, for an ox farm.

Speaker 30 Ox. Ox.

Speaker 47 I had a roommate in college.

Speaker 49 He was a D-lineman.

Speaker 49 Had a nickname Ox.

Speaker 4 Where do you ox? That's a cool nickname.

Speaker 52 Yeah, for sure.

Speaker 48 Where do oxes live?

Speaker 30 Google, real quick.

Speaker 4 Maybe he was an O-lineman. I don't know.

Speaker 30 He didn't play a lot.

Speaker 4 With a name like Ox, I feel like you have to.

Speaker 33 In Russia, that's pretty sick.

Speaker 49 There's no

Speaker 47 Oregon Trail.

Speaker 30 You had an Ox, right?

Speaker 3 Yeah, dude.

Speaker 4 And they all died fording the river.

Speaker 30 They pulled the wagons. They're the one that pulled the wagons.

Speaker 4 The Dales are just filled with the water. We're talking about

Speaker 30 the oxen. We've dipped through it all the time.
It really is.

Speaker 1 And the ox was a central part of it.

Speaker 3 All right, Hank.

Speaker 3 I'll go with the rabbit.

Speaker 4 You just said earlier rabbits weren't farming.

Speaker 30 You said that.

Speaker 41 And then all of my lists went away.

Speaker 30 Yeah, exactly. That's part of the thing.

Speaker 41 There's really much else to take.

Speaker 30 Yeah.

Speaker 44 I mean, rabbits are cool.

Speaker 30 Rabbits are cool.

Speaker 4 They just fuck all the time. Do rabbits.

Speaker 30 I do something really dumb.

Speaker 3 Never mind.

Speaker 4 Do rabbits lay eggs?

Speaker 30 Yeah.

Speaker 47 That was going to be my question, too.

Speaker 30 Thankfully, you must idiot. They don't, right? No one wants to.

Speaker 49 Absolutely not. Live birth.

Speaker 4 Live birth.

Speaker 4 How many bunnies do they squirt out at once? A bunch, I think.

Speaker 30 Yeah, six, seven, something like that.

Speaker 4 That's so weird to think that inside of a furry rabbit, there are like six other furry, slimy rabbits at any given time.

Speaker 47 You guys need to get out of this.

Speaker 30 You've been in a concrete jungle for far too long.

Speaker 30 Barn cat.

Speaker 3 That's a good pick.

Speaker 26 I thought of that. Just, yeah.

Speaker 30 Barn card's good.

Speaker 30 What do they do?

Speaker 49 Barn cat, Scouty, shout out to Scouty, the barn cat.

Speaker 30 Scout, Scouty, wherever we are right now.

Speaker 49 Big orange barn cat. He's probably in the barn.
He's just a panther.

Speaker 33 I mean, he's always killing.

Speaker 49 He's a killer.

Speaker 30 So we're always hunting.

Speaker 49 Look out the window. Oh, Scouty's on something.
Got a pigeon in his mouth.

Speaker 49 You know, mice, rats, you name it. He's always on the hunt.
And then, you know, the house is only 300 feet away from the barn, so the storms roll in. Scouty's at the door.
He's looking to get inside.

Speaker 49 He can lay it down for a day or so. Yeah.
Can get inside, beat the heat if he wants. He's got the best of both worlds going.

Speaker 32 Does he, now, does he respect the main house?

Speaker 18 Like, does he, when he comes in the main house, does he stay maybe like in the kitchen or does he stay?

Speaker 49 Yeah, he kind of lays low. He goes and lays it down, doesn't bother with the people.
He knows he's not a house cat.

Speaker 30 Nice.

Speaker 49 So there is a difference between a house cat and a barn cat.

Speaker 30 I kind of like house cats.

Speaker 15 Barn cats.

Speaker 4 Does Scoutie ever bring you offerings? Like if he kills a mouse or something?

Speaker 49 100%. He leaves it on the front porch.
He's real proud of his killings.

Speaker 49 Sometimes I'll send these guys.

Speaker 49 I'll walk out and it'll be just a head of a mouse. He'll just drop the head right on the front porch just to let you know he's still there.

Speaker 47 That's good.

Speaker 49 He's still killing. He's doing his job.

Speaker 51 Does anyone pet him? Oh, yeah.

Speaker 30 Does he like getting pet? Oh, yeah. Okay.

Speaker 21 But he's not one of those demanding cats that needs to be pet.

Speaker 49 We started off with two cats.

Speaker 30 They were house cats.

Speaker 49 They got pushed outside, and Scoutie drove the other one off. He's an alpha, you know, he took it off.

Speaker 30 Yeah, he drove it off.

Speaker 49 It was a really

Speaker 49 hard time at our house with my daughters.

Speaker 15 Wondering what Scoutie did with the other cat.

Speaker 41 What was the other cat's name?

Speaker 30 I don't even remember at this point.

Speaker 49 That's the concussion thing coming back to me.

Speaker 49 What was the cat's name?

Speaker 4 That's just a beta cat getting lost to the winds of history, Scotty, by the hand of the cat.

Speaker 55 Scouty drove off his sister into the nature.

Speaker 4 Scouty is a thug.

Speaker 33 Scouty.

Speaker 49 But he's always there. You'll be out there, you'll feeding stuff.
You turn around, Scoutie,

Speaker 49 on your shoulder. I like that.

Speaker 4 He's like the eyes of the barn.

Speaker 49 Yeah, he kind of runs a show out there.

Speaker 30 Yeah, for sure. I like that.
That's a good legend. Okay.

Speaker 48 We're going to put in the Mount Rushmore specifically, we'll say Barn Cat specifically, Scouty.

Speaker 53 There you go.

Speaker 21 And you'll probably win just from the Scouty pick.

Speaker 4 Scouty is a legend already. Shut up, Scouty.

Speaker 49 My kids will be really pumped, I guess.

Speaker 4 No, wait, does Scoutie have a tag or is he not?

Speaker 30 I like it.

Speaker 49 He's just free range. Yeah.

Speaker 37 We are moving soon, and

Speaker 49 it's a big discussion at the house. If will Scotty, Scouty,

Speaker 49 try and rehome? Oh, because that's a concern.

Speaker 55 Like, he'll run back?

Speaker 49 Yeah, back to his range.

Speaker 30 I had a cat that did that. So he's still back to my old house.
Damn.

Speaker 41 And when we sold our house, the people that moved into the house were like, what the fuck?

Speaker 30 How far was that?

Speaker 30 Yeah, we're concerned.

Speaker 30 How far away was it, hey?

Speaker 49 So we might lock him in the house for a little bit

Speaker 30 or something. I don't know.

Speaker 49 We're Googling that. We're concerned.

Speaker 2 Maybe release a bunch of mice so he's like, oh, all the mice are here.

Speaker 49 And when the first people came to look at our house,

Speaker 49 one of the comments they left was that they loved the giant orange cat that greeted them when they went to the barn. Fucking love Scout.
So I believe Scouty had a hand in

Speaker 11 a picture so we can put it in the show.

Speaker 30 Okay, yeah, for sure.

Speaker 21 Yeah, Scouty in his natural habitat.

Speaker 30 All right, Tony Scheffler, thank you.

Speaker 51 That's it. That's Mount Rushmore.

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Speaker 10 Okay, here she is, Nikki Bella.

Speaker 49 Okay, we now welcome on a former champion of the world.

Speaker 30 Yeah.

Speaker 48 Now retired WWE superstar.

Speaker 21 It's Nikki Bella.

Speaker 57 What's up?

Speaker 32 How does it feel to be retired? Let's start there.

Speaker 57 Oh, gosh.

Speaker 57 You know, actually, I would say like the typical, like, it doesn't feel any different, but it's not true because WWE having tag titles, my sister and I really wanted to go back and just, you know, start chaos with the girls that hold them.

Speaker 57 And I can't do that. So it's been tough.
That way of knowing, like, when you can't, like, it's not like I was able to just say, hey, I want to retire. You know, my body retired me.
Yeah.

Speaker 4 So did you have to file like official paperwork? Because I know in baseball, you have to submit things.

Speaker 57 You know, I've actually been pretty bummed because I haven't had like a huge retirement party. Yeah, you need to.
I kind of was like, Bri, you're my twin sister. Like, I get it.

Speaker 57 You are having babies, but I feel like I need it to be official. I need like a party about me.

Speaker 4 It's kind of selfish of her to have all those kids right in the middle of your day.

Speaker 57 100%.

Speaker 30 You're your gold watch or something.

Speaker 9 Yeah, yeah. So

Speaker 48 I wanted to start at the beginning, though, your path to becoming a WWE superstar.

Speaker 1 You started at soccer, right?

Speaker 21 Was your like first love?

Speaker 57 Oh, my gosh, yes.

Speaker 48 So

Speaker 48 you played in college?

Speaker 57 So, well, I did 11 years competitive. And then when it came a week before I was going to sign with Arizona State University, I snapped my leg in half.

Speaker 30 Ooh, oh, Jesus.

Speaker 57 And so it kind of just took me out of the game. I mean, well, it literally took me out of the game and then took out my mindset.

Speaker 57 I was like, I just don't want to heal and come back to soccer, but it was my whole life. And so a few years later, I ended up playing for Grossmont College.

Speaker 57 The coach knew who I was and knew my background. And so he let me walk on.
And then we went to state. And so that's over in San Diego.
And then I was going to go play in Italy.

Speaker 57 So the Women's League in the United States had already folded.

Speaker 57 And I was also going to do that while being in college. That I had like my whole future set up, right? And I just went in a different direction.
But

Speaker 57 the Women's League in Italy was like blooming, right? And I'm Italian, so they were like, We would love for you to come play over there.

Speaker 57 And then all of a sudden, WWE came to my door.

Speaker 12 Okay, wait, so one last question about soccer.

Speaker 21 Are you a messy or Ronaldo?

Speaker 30 Oh,

Speaker 57 you know, I guess I'd be a messy. Okay, okay, good answer.

Speaker 3 Yeah, we're about to kick you out.

Speaker 3 Yeah, right?

Speaker 30 I'm like, oh, you're like, thanks for stopping by.

Speaker 4 Bad opinions on soccer all around.

Speaker 47 So

Speaker 4 you kind of glossed over that a little bit. So you were done with soccer, and then you were like, I'll give WWE a shot.

Speaker 4 That's not the path that most people go through when they're like done playing soccer,

Speaker 4 I would imagine. So what was that process like?

Speaker 57 So it was my twin sister, Brie.

Speaker 57 I didn't grow up a WWE fan. Like my brother started watching it when I was in high school is when he got into it.
But no one that I was around was really like die-hard WWE fans. And

Speaker 57 I remember when I worked at Hooters,

Speaker 30 right? Never that place. Yep.
When I had my wings, I didn't. Okay.
Wait, did you work? Did you meet Tiger Woods? No.

Speaker 30 But Woodsworth Florida was great.

Speaker 57 I did. That's crazy.

Speaker 43 Double trouble.

Speaker 30 That's fishing with Diamond. That's every guy's dream.

Speaker 57 Twins. We do like, what was our Tuesday? We do something on Tuesday.
Oh, double lunch punch Tuesday. So, you know, you come in for lunch, we give you two little punches.
Nice. Yeah, it was fun.
Nice.

Speaker 57 But so I remember when i'd see the pay-per-views of wwe and i just wasn't there in that attitude era and kind of how they were with women it just it didn't attract me um but i was always um i always loved the entertainment industry since i'd been a little girl all i ever wanted to do was act i really loved the old hollywood side of it like marilyn monroe and all those type of women um

Speaker 57 and so when brie ended up bringing wwe me and she was like nicole you have to see what the women are doing i immediately went to my hooter days like wait they they were doing brawn panty matches.

Speaker 57 Like, no thanks. Right.
She's like, no, they're really like kicking butt in the ring. Like, you need to check it out.
So, I like saw it.

Speaker 57 And what really turned me on to WWE is not only were these women like showcasing athletic ability, but they got to be these characters.

Speaker 57 And, like, you were either the superhero, the villain, and you would either be in a love story. And I was like, this is actually really cool.
And we went and auditioned and tried out.

Speaker 57 And then the rest is history.

Speaker 4 So you're auditioning. How much of your own background did you have to write into a character as you were going through the auditioning process?

Speaker 57 So, you know, they just, everyone for so long would immediately look at my sister and I'd be like, okay, they're twins. Like, that's it.
So

Speaker 30 always

Speaker 30 himself.

Speaker 30 We are idiots.

Speaker 4 We literally look at you and we're like, twins.

Speaker 30 Twins. We're nice.

Speaker 57 Yep, fantasy.

Speaker 30 Yep, right.

Speaker 30 Love sisters. It's a weird fantasy.
You have to admit, right?

Speaker 57 I mean, like, guys are. Were you a Game of Thrones fan? Yeah.
You all felt weird, right, about Cersei and Jamie. Yeah.
So I felt like that my whole life when I hear about fantasy.

Speaker 21 When everyone was like, hey, you guys are twins.

Speaker 4 It is very gross when you break it down. It's like, let's, you know, what my fantasy is? Like a little bit of incest.
Yeah.

Speaker 47 Yeah.

Speaker 30 I was like watching Cooler's Light.

Speaker 59 Right.

Speaker 57 And we're not even fighting for a throne, so it's messed up.

Speaker 47 Oh, Cooper's Light.

Speaker 57 Those twins were cool. Yeah.

Speaker 57 I was like, actually, that's awesome.

Speaker 30 And I guess the turnout is like, whoa, there's two. But

Speaker 4 we're really, just guys, we're idiots at the end of the day.

Speaker 30 Two girls are better than one. Yes.

Speaker 28 No, we are dumb.

Speaker 4 We're definitely dumb. So, yeah, so you were going through the audition process, and they're like, we only see twins.

Speaker 57 Yeah, so, and they liked that. They're like, okay, twins.
And everything in that beginning stage was just identical. Like, we dressed alike.
They wanted us to talk at the same time.

Speaker 57 And really, when like Fearless Nikki took off, which is my character name, was when I finally put myself into my character fully. I was like, you know what?

Speaker 57 I am now going to like my character ended up looking like my soccer character. Like I did the jersey and the shorts and the kicks with the socks and the snapback.

Speaker 57 I mean, I want to wear a snapback on a field. But when I like finally put myself into that, is when, like, I feel like Embri was her hippie self, is when our superstars like really blossomed.

Speaker 30 Yeah.

Speaker 57 But just the twins, I mean, they still took us because they were looking for twins.

Speaker 30 Right.

Speaker 57 But goodness, for years, it was like, I'd look at her and I'm like, you're my clone.

Speaker 30 Yeah. She was nuts.

Speaker 21 So how much, I always am curious because I was a big wrestling fan in the late 90s. How much do the like the superstars have a say in the character writing?

Speaker 57 writing like what happens to your character or is it just like you have to do this you lose this match you win this one it's yeah well so when it comes like as far as characters um especially back when i started you would come up with your own ideas and you just keep pitching it and you would show them outfits you would make and they'd be like yes no now they have kind of their own character development so they may have an idea for you or you bring your own ideas um but as far as like your gear and everything what you wear like you decide that unless there's something specific specific Vince wants,

Speaker 57 your entrance,

Speaker 57 like the things you do, you come up with everything.

Speaker 56 So I could wear a t-shirt.

Speaker 57 I'd never have to take off my shirt. If you're like, I'm the t-shirt guy, that's that.

Speaker 46 I'm the guy who wears a sweatshirt, Kevin Owens.

Speaker 30 I mean, he's the t-shirt guy.

Speaker 57 He wrestles with a t-shirt.

Speaker 30 Exactly.

Speaker 57 But as far as finishes, well, I mean, I wish I can write my finishes. But unfortunately, that's the man that does that.

Speaker 48 Did you ever think about leaking a script?

Speaker 57 Oh, never. Yeah.

Speaker 48 Because that'd be big trouble.

Speaker 57 Oh, my big trouble. And people have done that.
Yeah. But like, for me, I really fell in love with the wrestling industry.
And like, I have so much respect for it. And I was like those kids.

Speaker 57 Like, I would, my imagination would get lost in it and creativity.

Speaker 57 And I would get excited to not only be a part of the shows, but to see them because I couldn't wait to see like what my fellow co-workers or people that are as fans of, what they were going to create that night.

Speaker 57 And then when I knew something was really good, I couldn't wait to see the fans' reaction. Like, oh, they're not even, they're in for a treat.
It It was like really fun for me.

Speaker 4 Has there ever been a point where you, as a wrestler, maybe you're a little bit in character or whatever, but you see somebody else who's so far into their character and they're just being a heel that you actually find yourself getting pissed off at that person in real life?

Speaker 57 Oh my gosh, yeah.

Speaker 57 It's like, especially like when they're in with someone you love, you're like, don't do that to him.

Speaker 30 Like, just or her.

Speaker 4 So even though you're like part of the show, you're also

Speaker 4 taking in the show like we are.

Speaker 12 Yeah, it becomes real life.

Speaker 30 Yeah, so what about when you kissed your sister's uh husband before she did?

Speaker 57 Oh, that was like, I know that was real life, right? Real life, but they weren't together yet, but it was like they would flirt a lot, and I knew they liked it.

Speaker 57 It was, oh no, okay, I think because we're all weird, I don't know, maybe it's it's like when that was so quick, like it would be weird. I think maybe if it was a really big passionate kiss, right?

Speaker 57 But I remember even when I did, they weren't even together, but I was like, well, that's nothing. Like, it was like such a quick peck, right?

Speaker 37 Yeah, Yeah, but they were flirting for each other.

Speaker 57 It was so weird. I mean, I knew they had a crush on each other.

Speaker 57 It was, and I could even tell the kissing the ring, me was like real quick and like, whatever, like, if I was his mom, and then him and Brie like pecked really long, like twice.

Speaker 57 And I was like, hmm, interesting.

Speaker 30 Yeah, I always thought I was the better twin.

Speaker 53 Is it more fun to be booed or cheered?

Speaker 57 Oh, you know, it's a good question. It's a very good question.

Speaker 4 It's a good question. She said it too.

Speaker 57 I have always loved getting booed.

Speaker 30 Love it.

Speaker 57 Like, there's something to make people feel that is like so empowering. It's really awesome.

Speaker 57 But when I did turn really good, and I, because I broke my neck and I had this comeback story, and I was like, people were like the living day Wonder Woman.

Speaker 57 And because my character turned so inspiring, that when people were chanting for me, like, it was like a different cheer in a way. Like, because they were so inspired.
And that felt good.

Speaker 57 It wasn't like, oh, let's just cheer for her because she's the good guy. Like, they were so happy that I overcame something.
And you felt that love and support in the cheer.

Speaker 57 So, I mean, other than that, I'd always, I loved, I'd embraced getting booed.

Speaker 51 It was the best.

Speaker 21 When you were injured, I always do this with wrestlers.

Speaker 33 Like, they get real injuries, but I always think it's fake.

Speaker 21 Like, when you had your neck brace, I laugh when I see that picture.

Speaker 1 But you actually were injured.

Speaker 57 But it's like doctor's order.

Speaker 46 Does that suck?

Speaker 48 That like people are like, ha, she's just doing a work.

Speaker 30 Yeah, right?

Speaker 57 I mean, I guess it depends the payoff. Okay.
Like, I knew at the end of the day, like, even the doctors would tell me, no, you won't ever get back in the ring.

Speaker 57 I knew I was going to get back in the ring. So because showing my neck brace so much and people thinking real or fake, it ended up making it such a great superhero story.

Speaker 57 Like I was like, when I debuted at SummerSlam, which they called me a week before, and I was like, my neck brace has been off for a month.

Speaker 57 And I had only trained for like, I actually like a week at that point or two weeks. But when my music hit, I was like.
The adrenaline.

Speaker 44 Were you scared to get back in the ring after all that?

Speaker 57 Totally. It was like, I would try not to think about it, but I will admit, what would get me in trouble is when I'd be out there, I'd forget.

Speaker 57 Like, I thought I was untouchable, and then I'd do too much, and I'd come back, and I'm like, oh my gosh, like, Nicole, like, you're going through this, and I would just forget all the time.

Speaker 57 Yeah, you're adrenaline, you know, you could do anything, right? You could lift cars.

Speaker 16 Yeah, so would you say, is wrestling real?

Speaker 57 Yeah, I would say wrestling's real. You know what? I always say,

Speaker 57 we have predetermined finishes. Okay.
And I like to say that we won't be. So in the NBA, The Warriors always win.
100%. Yep.
Right?

Speaker 57 Or a boxing match.

Speaker 30 And I hear rumors about that.

Speaker 57 Oh, yeah.

Speaker 57 We're like a Broadway body slams.

Speaker 57 You know, we're a form of entertainment that you can't get anywhere else. It's true.
You know, we're kind of like

Speaker 30 probably like

Speaker 21 10,000 backyards in America.

Speaker 53 But other than that,

Speaker 30 exactly.

Speaker 57 But I think why people get so upset when you say it's fake, it's because of what we're really putting our bodies through

Speaker 57 and the stories we're telling. You know, a lot of people's stories have a lot of their own emotions or what they're going through in them.

Speaker 57 And so, I mean, imagine it's like someone coming up and being like, Everything about you is fake, your life.

Speaker 30 So, I mean, I've been hit hard. Right.

Speaker 57 There's nothing fake about it.

Speaker 30 Did you ever cut yourself? No. Gosh, no.
They don't make it. I would not want to do the scars.

Speaker 30 I would do the old timers. I was like,

Speaker 4 you ever get bit by a snake?

Speaker 57 Did I get, no?

Speaker 30 Yeah.

Speaker 30 I am terrified. He got bit by a snake.
Well, he actually, it was a he put on a work.

Speaker 51 He pretended to get bit by a snake so that he could get stone clothes.

Speaker 4 But Jake the snake, he actually brought a snake out and somebody on the arm.

Speaker 15 Right. Yeah.
I was scared of him.

Speaker 30 Don't do that anymore.

Speaker 57 I don't like being around when people have pet snakes. I'm like, no, thank you.
Because

Speaker 57 I'm like, you can't control this

Speaker 57 wild animal. Yes.
And if it wants to strangle us, it's just going to do it. Correct.

Speaker 4 Do you know Dwight Howard, the basketball player? Yeah. He's in town.
He's got a lot of snakes. So just steer clear him.
No. Watch out.
He keeps them on his person.

Speaker 4 I may have made that part up, but just stay away from that.

Speaker 30 I was like, he does have snakes in his skin. He does.

Speaker 30 Yeah, he does he doesn't i don't know where he can he may or may not yeah unconfirmed as of press time that's nuts uh so i have a bone to pick with you because you share a twitter account with your sister oh yeah that's kind of weird people hate it that's really weird so this is the thing yeah it's very smart but yeah because you can blame really no and be like it was my sister yeah actually that's a good point

Speaker 57 so When they were starting the whole Twitter, when Twitter was like brand new and they came to WWE and wanted us all to sign up, again, they looked at us as one person, like the twin thing, and they just did App Bella Twins.

Speaker 57 And then Twitter started to become really cool and over. And there was already such a following that we had talked to them about, like, should we get our own now?

Speaker 57 And they're like, well, I mean, you guys have your own Instagrams. You're fine.

Speaker 57 So Brie and I have always like Brie's, I do more on Twitter because Bri's like, whatever, you just do it. Like, she'sn't, she doesn't even have Twitter app on her phone.
Okay. So

Speaker 57 we've even talked about times of changing it just to my name, but we're like, you know what? It's a brand. It's branded.
And I'll see people always say it. And it does suck.

Speaker 30 Which is weird.

Speaker 4 Like, the McCordy twins, they play for the Patriots. They do the same thing.
But Big Cat's right. It's like you can always blame the other person.

Speaker 30 That's true.

Speaker 4 If they tweet something problematic and be like, hey, it wasn't me. Nobody knows who to point their finger at it, actually.
So it's smart.

Speaker 57 I agree, actually. I didn't think of it that way, but I'm definitely going to start blaming her.

Speaker 30 I emotionally think about it.

Speaker 15 All the bad kids.

Speaker 30 But I agree. Dang.
Absolutely.

Speaker 21 Have you ever sneezed around Vince Mann?

Speaker 57 Sneezed. Yeah.

Speaker 57 No, because he doesn't like germs. You guys heard about that?

Speaker 4 I would know if you had sneezed around him. Yeah.

Speaker 30 No, he doesn't like people who don't have control.

Speaker 12 It's not the germs.

Speaker 16 It's they don't have control.

Speaker 30 Of their germs? Of their body.

Speaker 42 He likes involuntary reaction.

Speaker 4 He gets so mad at himself when he sneezes. Yeah.
He just stews and raises his pop off.

Speaker 30 I didn't even. So I have to sneeze around.

Speaker 57 Thank goodness. I have not sneezed around him.
But I do remember one time we were overseas in,

Speaker 57 was it Iraq? Or no, we were in Afghanistan and we were doing a thing for the troops, uh, tribute to the troops.

Speaker 30 Thank you, yeah, you're welcome.

Speaker 57 And I was eating a corn dog in front of him,

Speaker 57 and he goes, You're eating a corn dog, and I was like, Yeah, I mean, I'm on a military base, so I mean, it was like not a brunch fries, I didn't really have choices.

Speaker 57 I mean, maybe deli meat, I don't know. Um, he was so grossed out, and he's like, Do you know what those are made of?

Speaker 30 And I mean, at the time, I didn't really care, I was like, just hungry.

Speaker 57 I mean, I'm in Afghanistan, you know what I mean?

Speaker 3 Like, did you went in Rome?

Speaker 30 Yeah, right.

Speaker 21 Did you you ever get called into his office?

Speaker 57 No, thank goodness. But I've never had a corn dog since.

Speaker 30 Okay.

Speaker 4 Never. So he's an anti-hot dog, presumably, too.

Speaker 57 I just, I don't know what it is about a corn dog, but all I know is I then felt grossed out at myself that I had a corner.

Speaker 4 He made you buy into his.

Speaker 57 I was like, maybe this stuff, I want to say, is it the corn dogs that are always the rumors about the cockroaches?

Speaker 57 What's that? Or the cockroach legs, or is that Snickers bars?

Speaker 30 Oh, my God. I hope it's not Snickers for me.

Speaker 58 It's Snickers for me.

Speaker 30 No, there's definitely a lot of stuff.

Speaker 30 God damn it.

Speaker 4 There are cockroach legs in corn dogs?

Speaker 57 There was some.

Speaker 57 We might have to go.

Speaker 15 But that's like a new thing.

Speaker 4 That's like a new hippie thing is putting cricket flour into stuff and

Speaker 30 making bread out of bugs.

Speaker 4 Oh, yeah.

Speaker 19 They eat crickets. Yeah.

Speaker 57 I literally was in yoga class the other day.

Speaker 30 I'm trying to get my Zen on

Speaker 30 hot yoga.

Speaker 57 Four power. It's amazing.
I'm sweating, getting my Zen on, and then there is a cricket in this hot weather.

Speaker 57 Well, not weather, but the hot room.

Speaker 57 I was so grossed out, and people eat them now.

Speaker 4 Yeah, yes, they grind them up into flour, too, and put them in cookies. So, you never know if you're eating good protein out on the street.

Speaker 30 I just am never gonna eat again. How about that?

Speaker 53 Yeah, that works. Um,

Speaker 9 so you have started podcasting.

Speaker 57 I love podcasting.

Speaker 12 Okay, do you need any tips?

Speaker 3 We're kind of a big deal.

Speaker 52 Yeah, ask us

Speaker 30 number one sports podcast. You interview,

Speaker 57 I know, and I see your guys's.com all the time. Your guys'

Speaker 57 interviews

Speaker 57 or articles go viral all the time in the wrestling world. Oh, yeah.
And I've seen when you guys have talked bad about me.

Speaker 3 I personally haven't. Oh, that's our.

Speaker 47 That's Robbie Fox.

Speaker 57 You can beat him. Thanks, Robbie Fox.
Robbie Foxy.

Speaker 30 He's our guy.

Speaker 4 He weighs about.

Speaker 16 We'll sell him out for much as one year a second.

Speaker 30 Good, yeah.

Speaker 3 Easily. Oh, I'll get him real quick.

Speaker 57 Oh, yeah. Ambry, Robbie.

Speaker 30 Yeah, Ambry.

Speaker 5 So what is the podcast?

Speaker 30 How often does it come out?

Speaker 57 Every Wednesday, we drop a new episode, and we're kind of like a variety show, like a happy hour. Like we didn't.

Speaker 57 There's so many amazing inspirational talks, and there's, I mean, we can't do what you guys do with sports and everything like that.

Speaker 30 Yeah,

Speaker 57 we're just, you know, no, of course, you guys are two of a kind.

Speaker 30 Um, go on,

Speaker 30 I sense a problem.

Speaker 4 You guys are too good looking to be podcasters.

Speaker 30 Yeah, you should, you gotta, you gotta, you should get

Speaker 44 you should get short, yeah, junk yourself up a little bit because nobody likes to do that.

Speaker 57 But we do drink on our podcasts, that's the good, that's we're like a drinking show,

Speaker 57 so and we talk about

Speaker 57 we usually pop open a bottle of something cody so nice no we usually do wine champagne um we actually did mock tales last week which was weird but we had a 19 year old on so we felt weird we just started to have we've only had a few guests but we usually it's just brie and i and i don't know if you guys heard of like we used we had this game show that started on youtube and it kind of went a little viral but called bella brains which is kind of the concept of are you smarter than a fifth grader okay are we smarter than players right though well let's go so it's brie's husband daniel bryan yeah He will make one of us leave the room, and then he asks, will ask me three questions and he asks Brie, and then we keep score.

Speaker 57 And it'll be like, name the planets.

Speaker 57 And for some reason, my sister and I botch a lot of stuff on that.

Speaker 44 Yeah, do you want to play Bell of Brains right now?

Speaker 52 Yeah, give me a question you've gotten.

Speaker 4 Yeah, why don't I leave the room and then you leave the room?

Speaker 30 We should.

Speaker 59 Actually, we need it.

Speaker 57 Yeah.

Speaker 9 One of the questions you've gotten: name the planets.

Speaker 36 Uranus.

Speaker 30 Neptune.

Speaker 4 My very

Speaker 4 mother just served us nine pizzas.

Speaker 15 Saturn. Who?

Speaker 4 That's the acrostic thing you can use to remember. Oh, really? Mercury, Venus, Earth, Mars, Jupiter.

Speaker 30 Not Earth. Earth's a planet.
Oh, shit.

Speaker 47 Oh, it's a star. She's right.

Speaker 30 Bella Brains yourself.

Speaker 57 I was going to say, I don't think Earth is.

Speaker 30 Oh, most definitely a planet.

Speaker 4 Mars. Shame.

Speaker 30 That one was like a few weeks ago. 100% a planet.

Speaker 57 So here you go. This is our issue.
So this is Bella Brains every week on our podcast.

Speaker 30 Okay, I like it.

Speaker 57 We also, Brie and I debate debate about something. So, like, our first debate we had, and I want to hit your guys',

Speaker 57 no.

Speaker 30 Okay. You're anti-abortion.

Speaker 30 Is that what you're saying?

Speaker 30 I don't speak at all about politics, but gun rights or religion. Okay, okay.

Speaker 57 Is one night stand

Speaker 59 sober or drunk?

Speaker 30 Which

Speaker 30 do I prefer?

Speaker 57 No, no, what do you prefer?

Speaker 9 Oh, I would say drunks because then you can last more than like 20 seconds.

Speaker 30 Really? Yeah.

Speaker 43 But if you're too drunk, then it's whiskey. Yeah.

Speaker 30 We totally debated about it.

Speaker 4 I would say I like sober.

Speaker 59 Yeah, thank you. I like sober.

Speaker 4 I like to be in control of my body. Me too.

Speaker 44 So I can operate at maximum efficiency.

Speaker 57 If you're going to add a number, you might as well know if you're going to like it or not.

Speaker 30 Yeah, I got a pleasure.

Speaker 4 God gave me a pleasure-making body, and if I'd be disrespecting him if I diluted that with the devil's liquor.

Speaker 3 I like to be drunk because then she doesn't remember that I kept my shirt on.

Speaker 57 Wine is Jesus juice to me, right?

Speaker 30 Oh, yeah. That's good.

Speaker 57 Just keep your shirt on. You're the t-shirt guy here.

Speaker 30 It's my brand. Yeah.
Are you a t-shirt guy at the pool? Actually, no, I'm not. But I actually.

Speaker 57 Isn't it funny when people wear white t-shirts at the pool.

Speaker 30 We see people.

Speaker 57 We see it. It's okay.
Yeah.

Speaker 30 All right.

Speaker 21 So I actually have to take my t-shirt off a little bit here and we have to ask one question that's maybe a little uncomfortable.

Speaker 30 Quickly move on from it.

Speaker 4 You obviously were in a relationship with John Cena.

Speaker 36 He came on our podcast.

Speaker 30 Oh, yeah.

Speaker 18 Right before you guys broke up.

Speaker 30 Oh, no.

Speaker 21 I showed him my belly button and he looked at it like he wanted to fuck it.

Speaker 53 And I think it might have had something to do.

Speaker 4 It's a deep belly button.

Speaker 37 He looked at it like,

Speaker 42 oh my God, I'm about to risk it all for this belly button.

Speaker 28 That is and then you guys broke up like a week later.

Speaker 45 Do you blame me?

Speaker 57 It was your belly button. Yeah.

Speaker 30 That's too bad. I actually'm not deep enough.

Speaker 51 Okay, I wrote a poem.

Speaker 17 You do poetry too, right?

Speaker 57 I love poetry.

Speaker 3 Okay, here we go.

Speaker 53 I wrote a poem for you.

Speaker 1 Lost in your depths.

Speaker 12 I find myself yearning for more.

Speaker 23 How, why, horny, your belly button.

Speaker 27 Can I fuck it?

Speaker 30 Wow.

Speaker 58 I wrote it in John Cena's mind.

Speaker 57 By the way, that was really good. Thank you.

Speaker 30 You're welcome. I appreciate it.
It was very creative.

Speaker 4 Did you just write a poem about how you wanted to fuck your own belly button?

Speaker 30 John Cena wanted to fuck my belly button.

Speaker 48 Yeah, but through

Speaker 57 masturbating to a whole new level.

Speaker 30 Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 57 It's like.

Speaker 31 So I apologize.

Speaker 42 I probably had something to do with it.

Speaker 21 It was obviously

Speaker 30 the real question.

Speaker 1 Did it suck having it be so public?

Speaker 30 Oh, yeah. It's,

Speaker 57 you know, I think like being a reality star, I know what comes with that. And I'm an open book and I put everything out there.
I never expected it to be that public. Like, and just how every, like,

Speaker 57 your headline almost every day, but it's stuff that's so untrue. And you just get so sick of fighting for yourself because then it makes you look defensive.

Speaker 57 Or then people take those words of you trying to protect yourself or stick up for yourself. And then that turns into another headline.

Speaker 57 And what people don't realize is like there's two people hurting really bad.

Speaker 30 Right. And then we know he was.
He was very sad. I know.
Yeah. That was sad.
Yeah.

Speaker 56 It made me sad. Yeah.

Speaker 57 He's a great guy. Yeah.
Really good man.

Speaker 4 Yeah, and he loves you.

Speaker 30 He loves my belly button. He watches on my back for that.

Speaker 52 He loved my four nipples, too.

Speaker 4 We're not going to get into how you're going to be able to do that.

Speaker 3 You have four nipples.

Speaker 30 Yeah, you guys are on the team.

Speaker 4 So he kind of wanted to titty fuck my one.

Speaker 30 You'd have to do your strap.

Speaker 44 No, no, I'd do it.

Speaker 52 Your bra strap.

Speaker 4 So I got this one right here, and he wanted to titty fuck that one.

Speaker 42 Yeah. And then this one.

Speaker 58 This is all after the belly button.

Speaker 30 This one he wasn't impressed with. He always gets so turned on with me.
He was horny. He was horny.

Speaker 4 Is my body ready for WWE?

Speaker 30 Totally. Okay.
I think you could do great work.

Speaker 52 Good to know.

Speaker 4 I have a serious question. Actually, it's not that serious.
But what hurts more? Taking a folding chair to the back or watching your twin sister get one?

Speaker 57 Oh, gosh. You know what it'd be? Watching Bri get one.
Yeah. That would hurt more.

Speaker 30 Can you feel her pain? Like twin stuff?

Speaker 57 I could feel her nerves. Like, it's really weird.
I could feel her sadness. Anything emotionally I could feel.

Speaker 28 Have you ever had that where you like woke up one day, like, uh-oh, Brie's in trouble?

Speaker 53 Like, twin.

Speaker 30 What are they talking about?

Speaker 57 There's stuff that

Speaker 57 it's

Speaker 57 ESP.

Speaker 30 Oh, my God. I'm just ESP.
I went.

Speaker 57 yeah it's like not the twin bon it's the twin like connection or whatever twinception can she feel that you're like having a great time right now and laughing probably she'll probably text me like so what were you doing who were you hanging out with we'll get weird feelings about each other

Speaker 30 yeah that's crazy kind of got jealous of some titties you saw yeah um

Speaker 57 yeah it's i don't know it's it's uh

Speaker 57 it's a weird weird thing if all the twins out there you know what i mean you have to be a twin to get it i got one more twin question

Speaker 21 i've had a lot of people come at me and say, I'm wrong for this, but at any point, I have a theory that every twin they kiss at some point because they're like, You look like me, I look like you.

Speaker 21 Like, we're all like kind of narcissistic.

Speaker 30 Like, if I saw myself, I'd be like, give myself a little smooch. Really? Did you do that?

Speaker 57 No.

Speaker 30 I think you've been watching too much.

Speaker 57 Game of Thrones. Okay.

Speaker 57 No, I've never kissed my sister ever.

Speaker 30 Not once. Not once.
No peck.

Speaker 30 No peck. No.

Speaker 30 You look cute. She coded you.

Speaker 59 no, you look the same.

Speaker 57 My sister and I, I have to admit, like

Speaker 57 I could definitely see other twins out there doing that.

Speaker 30 Yeah, for sure.

Speaker 57 Okay, male or female.

Speaker 57 But Bri and I, like, we even have a hard time hugging. Like, we're like one person, but we're very different.
But we're, we've always just been very tomboyish, too. So, like,

Speaker 57 we're not. My mom used to laugh because, like, we're such huggers in PDA with like everyone except each other.
Interesting. She's like, you guys are so weird about that.

Speaker 57 So, I know something probably happened in my childhood. I'll have to figure it out in therapy.

Speaker 30 But

Speaker 57 yeah, we've never, ever kissed.

Speaker 30 Yeah. Ever.
Okay.

Speaker 3 I don't believe you, but okay.

Speaker 30 No, I swear.

Speaker 30 I don't know what you're saying. I know you swear I'm not sure.
I don't believe you, but it's okay.

Speaker 4 You're Italian, though, right? Yeah. You kiss every time you say hello.

Speaker 30 Yeah, when you manja, it's customary to you. It's weird.

Speaker 57 It's like my sister and I don't do it.

Speaker 20 Before the seven feasts.

Speaker 57 We get weirded out.

Speaker 30 You're like, oh, you manja.

Speaker 4 Fish number six. Luffy.

Speaker 44 Yeah. You're like, Costa no stream.

Speaker 30 Not her.

Speaker 4 Omerta. You know what?

Speaker 42 It's like all the Italian stereotypes.

Speaker 30 You know what?

Speaker 4 It's Omerta. They're not allowed to talk about it.
That's it.

Speaker 30 That's all we got. And I'm Mexican.

Speaker 57 So, like, Italian-Mexican. They both do it.

Speaker 30 Okay, there you go. Yeah.
Yeah, not us.

Speaker 30 Sorry.

Speaker 57 We're the disappointing twins.

Speaker 4 No matter what you say, Big Cat's not going to believe you.

Speaker 30 No, he's had this theory baked in for the last

Speaker 30 episode.

Speaker 27 Well, it's one of those perfect theories because every twin's going to deny it.

Speaker 30 Yeah. And then you're always on the hunt for it.
I don't know.

Speaker 57 I think some twins would actually be honest.

Speaker 57 I think there's some.

Speaker 43 If I saw myself right now, I'd kiss myself.

Speaker 30 You guys would lick each other's belly buttons.

Speaker 4 69 belly buttons with each other.

Speaker 30 Yeah, exactly.

Speaker 3 I don't think it's ever been done before.

Speaker 30 Yeah, it's invented a new sex position. Yeah, you could actually have like a dildo and like actually do the other belly buttons.
Yeah, I mean,

Speaker 10 it would be like a Chinese finger trip.

Speaker 30 The opposite of the children's

Speaker 57 one at each other. Yeah, the double side or whatever they call it.

Speaker 44 Double side belly button.

Speaker 30 It's not crazy.

Speaker 26 I don't hate the idea.

Speaker 57 I'm gone for it. New invention.

Speaker 30 You can kind of make a lot of money.

Speaker 4 What's the key to cutting an awesome promo?

Speaker 57 Heart. Having, well, I don't mean, of course, heart.

Speaker 57 um having something truthful there like of course you could always tell a story but everyone that i've seen cut a really amazing promo they have truth in it so they either really don't like the other person and when they're hitting them below the belt like there's truth to it or they bring it or you know what not truth i should say personal they make it personal

Speaker 57 That has been, that is how I've done some of my best. And anyone I've seen that I've enjoyed, I know that it was personal.
And the other person never saw some of those words coming.

Speaker 57 Yeah, they weren't a part of the script.

Speaker 32 Is it like, is the WWE behind the scenes very clicky?

Speaker 57 I would assume it's yeah, I mean, we're together a lot, so you definitely like SmackDown, you know, they have their group that travels all the time.

Speaker 57 There'll be clicks within there, and then Raw as well. Because, I mean, we're together when you're on it full-time, like you're with people more than your family, your friends, your kids.

Speaker 57 I mean, five days, four days a week, and then when you go overseas, you're 14 days straight. I know, no breaks, no off-season.

Speaker 4 That's it, you You know, have you ever got a script and just been like, I don't want to do this shit?

Speaker 30 Oh my God. Yeah.
Have you ever gone to the bottom?

Speaker 4 Can you ever just not do that?

Speaker 40 You have?

Speaker 57 So I've, in the beginning of my career, the one thing that I regretted was I played by the rules so much because I just, I do have so much respect for my bosses, but I think because being a competitive soccer player for so long, like you listened to your coaches, that's what made you better.

Speaker 57 So I took that mentality into the WWE, but what I realized is that actually held me back. Like I came off so vanilla at times.

Speaker 57 Like, like, it was like not that interesting because I didn't break those rules. Or when I cut those promos, I didn't make it personal.

Speaker 57 And until I started, like, my Divis Championship reign, I just started making it personal. And the best thing I ever heard was, like, apologize later.

Speaker 57 And I really took it, like, I would never know something so bad about someone and put that out on live TV.

Speaker 57 But

Speaker 57 I would definitely start to go off script. And sometimes you get yelled at.
Like, one time I made a Cinco de Mayo joke about Trump, and I got in a lot of trouble, but I thought it was really funny.

Speaker 57 Um, so and the crowd thought it was hilarious, right? But and I don't ever get political, but I was Mexican and it was there.

Speaker 4 It was like so layup, it was a layup, and he was like getting his head shaved in the center of the ring at the time, too.

Speaker 30 So it's like, hey, we can't make fun of this guy anymore. Yeah,

Speaker 57 it was, I thought it was so funny, but and I, that's when I was like, okay, I'm never gonna do anything like that again.

Speaker 57 Like, nothing with politics, but I thought because I did it in such a playful way, because I hate, I don't ever talk about politics or religion, but because I thought I did it playfully, that was the only thing I would never touch anyway.

Speaker 57 Right, right.

Speaker 32 How scary is the Undertaker?

Speaker 4 Please say scary.

Speaker 57 I'm very. Okay, good.

Speaker 21 I didn't want to be like, oh, he's such a teddy bear.

Speaker 57 No, he's, yeah, very intimidating. Yes.

Speaker 30 I mean, he's a dead man.

Speaker 3 Right.

Speaker 57 Right. He, you know what it is, is people have so much respect for him backstage.
So he just, I mean, he's, and he's iconic and he's a legend, and he's treated like that when he's backstage.

Speaker 57 Like, you wait in line to shake the Undertaker's head. Yeah.
Good. I'm happy to hear that.

Speaker 53 Yeah. That makes me feel good.

Speaker 4 So you're not into politics, but like there have been wrestlers that have gotten into politics. Yeah.
Kane, Jesse the Body.

Speaker 4 Jesse the Body probably going to be president one day. You ever going to get into politics yourself?

Speaker 30 Oh, hell no.

Speaker 44 No, no.

Speaker 44 No.

Speaker 4 What if you could be a senator?

Speaker 57 No.

Speaker 4 If you could be president? No. You wouldn't want to be president?

Speaker 30 No way.

Speaker 57 I wouldn't want that job.

Speaker 2 What about president of WWE?

Speaker 30 Well, you know, maybe that.

Speaker 57 No, actually, I don't know if I'd want that job.

Speaker 33 You're doubting for Vince's job.

Speaker 30 No, yeah. I don't know if I'd ever want, sorry, I don't know if I want that job.
I am,

Speaker 57 it's, you know, being in that position, I would enjoy being a leader, but something where no one is ever going to agree on it's going to bring hate, I don't want to be a part of that.

Speaker 57 Like, you're in such a bad, like around bad energy all the time. And I like being around good energy.
Yeah. I just, I don't stick around people who make me feel bad or they bring bad juju in my life.

Speaker 57 I'm like, no, I'm out. Like, you're out of here.

Speaker 30 So

Speaker 57 I couldn't do it.

Speaker 42 I wouldn't want want to do it are you the most famous pair twins

Speaker 3 Olson twins

Speaker 53 yeah the Olson twins the Winklevoss twins the who the Facebook founders of Facebook oh yeah well they would have found

Speaker 4 allegedly if they found it Facebook they would have found it Facebook they're yachters right

Speaker 30 they own a yacht

Speaker 30 tea and tamara who's that uh you didn't know oh yeah

Speaker 57 come on uh tiki and ronde barber yeah who else do we have um who are the guys that want they used to be on the suns right or one's on the suns and one's on the oh the market the Morris twins.

Speaker 30 Yeah, they're identical. Yeah, that's crazy.

Speaker 31 They'll also fight you if you try to fuck their mom.

Speaker 30 Oh, we learned that. Did you try to no, I didn't, but someone else did when we tried to fight them.

Speaker 30 Yeah.

Speaker 30 Crazy, yeah. Yeah.

Speaker 30 Who, I mean, there's I think you're up there.

Speaker 57 I think you're like, I mean, I do think we're up there.

Speaker 30 Wilson and then you're cool. I think Wilson, just because of how long they've been around.

Speaker 58 Right.

Speaker 42 But if you guys keep going, you might have to do it.

Speaker 57 I've tried to ask to compete with them in the ring for WrestleMania.

Speaker 30 That would be awesome. That would be so short.

Speaker 37 It would be

Speaker 57 so sick.

Speaker 30 It would be awesome.

Speaker 57 They come in their big robes.

Speaker 4 Did WWE end up asking them?

Speaker 57 Probably not.

Speaker 57 And they probably were like, what?

Speaker 30 Who?

Speaker 57 He's like, who? Are you serious?

Speaker 12 All right.

Speaker 31 I got one last question. It's a SeeGeek question.

Speaker 18 You put in promo code take.

Speaker 21 You get $10 off. Seek Geek perched.

Speaker 4 Go to a WWE match.

Speaker 21 Seek Geek, $10 off.

Speaker 21 How hard is Dancing with the Stars?

Speaker 57 The hardest thing I've ever done in my life.

Speaker 42 Harder than wrestling?

Speaker 30 Yes. No.
Yep.

Speaker 42 But you just get out there and do the cha-cha-cha.

Speaker 57 Yeah, I wish it was that easy. That's what I thought.

Speaker 57 So being an athlete, like my whole life, I've trained. Like

Speaker 57 in soccer, you train a certain way. And what I learned in soccer helped me a lot in the ring with like my footing and stuff.
Dancing is way different.

Speaker 57 Like how we hold our bodies, like we're ready to fight and get hit. They're always out.
So they were trying to like retrain my muscles, which my muscles were like, no.

Speaker 57 But not only are you trying to learn to dance and you're trying to be graceful, like I thought I had some grace to me. No, I'm so far off.

Speaker 57 But it was like, so you're learning, you think 90 seconds or a minute, like, or it was like a minute 15 is like, not a lot. It is so many steps.
Right. Then you're on live TV.

Speaker 57 Then you know you're going to be judged. And before what you guys don't hear is like when we're on set, there's three clicks that play to the whole house.
So you know your music is about to start.

Speaker 57 So you better be ready. I started to have nightmares about those three clicks.

Speaker 60 Really?

Speaker 57 It was like crazy. Even my sister, because she would come and watch me a lot, she had nightmares about the three clicks because she gets so nervous for me.
But it was the hardest thing I've ever done.

Speaker 30 Would you finish it?

Speaker 57 And it was hard on my body. I made it to the seventh week, I think.

Speaker 30 So it's a lot of fun.

Speaker 57 I feel like I got gypped. I should have kept, I should have, I had another week.

Speaker 4 Be careful. That's problematic.
We have gypsy listeners.

Speaker 3 Yeah.

Speaker 4 So we don't want another Trump

Speaker 3 episode here.

Speaker 30 Jip means gypsy. Yeah.

Speaker 57 Yeah. Oh, I thought I got a lot.

Speaker 4 So I deal with them at the fair and then you're like, ah, we stole your mask.

Speaker 43 Now they're called gypsy.

Speaker 30 You have no soul. Yeah.
Like that kind of shit. Wow.

Speaker 4 See, this is the type of stuff you don't necessarily know get in the podcast game.

Speaker 3 You can't be.

Speaker 30 You got to be careful.

Speaker 4 You can't say the G words.

Speaker 32 We know everything.

Speaker 57 Wait, seriously, you guys are being honest. Yes, it is.

Speaker 30 Because I never know if you're being honest. No, no, no.

Speaker 32 We usually are joking.

Speaker 57 Well, you know what else I got in trouble for saying what? Bums.

Speaker 30 Buns? Bums. Bums.
Bums. Yes.

Speaker 30 Yes, yes.

Speaker 57 And I didn't know that was a bad word.

Speaker 30 That was bad.

Speaker 3 That was problematic. Oh, my God.

Speaker 30 Yeah.

Speaker 59 I didn't know that B word.

Speaker 57 Oh, my gosh.

Speaker 30 Yeah, do not say it word. They said buns.

Speaker 31 I was like, why can't I say buns in there?

Speaker 30 So no

Speaker 30 chip. No chips.
No, no, no.

Speaker 4 I just said it.

Speaker 3 Yeah. Yeah.

Speaker 30 Yeah.

Speaker 33 No, you say, you say, I got Jewed.

Speaker 30 Oh, my gosh. It's worse.

Speaker 30 What do you want to say now?

Speaker 30 I got ripped off. You just left me open there for that joke.
That was good.

Speaker 57 I got ripped off.

Speaker 30 Yeah. Yeah, you got ripped off.

Speaker 30 That sucks. Yeah, don't say that's okay.

Speaker 57 Can you guys send me a list of

Speaker 30 everything?

Speaker 57 I put my foot in my mouth constantly. Yeah, that's okay.

Speaker 30 Such an interesting way. way.

Speaker 58 I think as long as you're not doing it maliciously.

Speaker 30 Yeah, right. You can't say R words.
We don't know this world, though. Can't say what?

Speaker 4 Washington R words.

Speaker 30 Washington R the R words, not the Redskins.

Speaker 44 We'll give you a whole word. So you don't

Speaker 30 get into the words.

Speaker 4 Yeah, we'll get you a sheet. We haven't seen it.

Speaker 30 No, you can't say the other R word either. What's that?

Speaker 30 We're in a bad spot. Disabled.

Speaker 4 Also, a joke that I made last night that I wrote down on Big Cat's Pad that he scratched out. You can't say that either, but we're not going to tell you what that was.
Oh, dang.

Speaker 4 I have one last question. Who would you like to body slam? Just like outside of wrestling? Name one person.

Speaker 30 Gosh,

Speaker 4 that's really good. Anyone in the world?

Speaker 57 There's a few people I've done business with that I'd love to body slam.

Speaker 50 Spill it.

Speaker 57 I can't do to lawyer stuff, but.

Speaker 4 Let's get that tea.

Speaker 57 The day the paperwork's official, they probably have a few body slams in their future. I like it.

Speaker 31 I would not cross you.

Speaker 30 No.

Speaker 57 I have a side that I get.

Speaker 30 Yeah.

Speaker 57 It's the Italian. I'm a fireball.
Like, when you cross that, and it takes a little bit, which is kind of surprising, but when you cross that.

Speaker 1 The Italian temperatures go bang on a drum.

Speaker 57 And I'm Latin, and I'm Scorpio.

Speaker 30 Like, I got a lot of things. I'm all fire.

Speaker 57 November 21st.

Speaker 44 But we're fired. What are you supposed to do?

Speaker 30 I'm Aquarius. Who's that? Lover?

Speaker 57 Probably.

Speaker 30 No, Scorpio's lovers.

Speaker 57 Who else?

Speaker 57 I mean,

Speaker 57 I technically actually, right now, a lot of people who are speaking in Alabama, I like to body slam.

Speaker 30 There we go. There we go.
We don't get anything. We don't know, but I agree.
Yeah.

Speaker 4 Smash their ass through the table.

Speaker 4 Could you kick our ass? Totally.

Speaker 57 If me and Big Cat attacked you, I mean, this is the one thing I will say:

Speaker 30 I'm fat.

Speaker 57 No. Men do.
You guys do have a strength that, like, when I go to wrestle, guy, all of a sudden, you guys,

Speaker 57 you just, there's something that you're like, okay, wow. It's a different conversation.

Speaker 46 spirit. It's all that spur.
But I know,

Speaker 57 I don't know, but some might not have it.

Speaker 30 Yeah, some might not make me feel really strong.

Speaker 37 Right?

Speaker 57 Strong as a musician. But then there's, but I have ways where I could kick ass.
Yeah, stamina. I would be, I would be out of stamina.

Speaker 30 Yeah, and I could kick really hard.

Speaker 57 Yes, I bet.

Speaker 3 I bet you.

Speaker 57 And then I would kick someone in the nut so hard, and then I'd hit him with wrestling moves.

Speaker 30 Yep, okay.

Speaker 57 And I'd probably shove my foot up there better.

Speaker 30 Okay, that's nice.

Speaker 4 Some people are into that, though.

Speaker 30 Yeah, but I would make it so not enjoyable.

Speaker 57 And as I was doing it, I'd probably rip their hair and, like, yeah, yeah.

Speaker 30 Oh, yes.

Speaker 47 Pull my hair. Pull my hair.

Speaker 37 Yeah, way to you.

Speaker 30 Choke me, daddy.

Speaker 57 You want to hear a funny thing? So I was at a party. This was years ago.
I'm at a party, and this guy wouldn't stop saying, you can't take me down, whatever. And I'm like, oh, this dude won't shut up.

Speaker 57 I literally walked up to him and I grabbed his head and flipped him over. I did a headlock takeover.

Speaker 57 His face, and everyone was like, oh, shit. He's like, oh, my gosh.
And I was like, so what? Hell yeah. Like, yeah.

Speaker 30 I know how to do that. Yes.

Speaker 57 I almost broke a guy's wrist in a club, too, one time. He grabbed my friend's thigh, and literally, my first reaction, I grabbed it.
And you know, when you do, like, with the

Speaker 30 snap, someone had stopped me from breaking it.

Speaker 57 Damn it. I didn't want to stop.
You should have.

Speaker 4 Wow. Just like bent down.

Speaker 30 All right. Well, we won't fuck with you.

Speaker 4 I was going to. The last question was going to be: defend yourself, and then we were going to attack you.

Speaker 30 Like Spider-Man. I think you've proven that you would cancel that shit out of us.

Speaker 1 Let everyone go listen to the Bella Twins podcast.

Speaker 7 Every Wednesday.

Speaker 4 Yep. They never say the word gip.

Speaker 57 Yep. no, we don't say bad words, but we drink a lot.

Speaker 30 Yes, so try to get a lot of fun. And see if you're smarter than us.

Speaker 2 Yes, thank you, Nikki. This was awesome.

Speaker 57 This was fun. Thank you.
Appreciate it.

Speaker 30 Thanks, Nikki.

Speaker 24 What's up, guys?

Speaker 36 It's Big Cat here making my Irish entrance with proper number 12 Irish whiskey.

Speaker 32 How do you make an Irish entrance?

Speaker 58 You ask?

Speaker 21 It starts with a shot of proper number 12 Irish whiskey because real friends don't let friends Irish exit a party without a story to tell.

Speaker 26 Original proper number 12 is rich rich in a smooth blend of golden grain and single malt.

Speaker 32 Age four years in bourbon barrels.

Speaker 21 Mix it up with some ginger ale for a classic and refreshing proper ginger.

Speaker 21 In the mood for something smooth but a little sweeter, try proper Irish Apple, a delicious blend of proper's award-winning Irish whiskey with crisp, fresh notes of apple.

Speaker 48 So get out there and make your Irish entrance.

Speaker 26 Anything else just wouldn't be proper.

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Speaker 9 Okay, let's get to some segments.

Speaker 2 First up, we have Bachelorette Talk for guys that don't watch the Bachelorette.

Speaker 19 But PFT, I have some news for you.

Speaker 14 You're not going to like this.

Speaker 36 Hank spoiled the Bachelorette for me.

Speaker 4 How dare you, Hank?

Speaker 45 He told me the winner on our plane, and I said, what the fuck, dude?

Speaker 24 I love this show.

Speaker 32 I watch it religiously. I don't watch it religiously.

Speaker 34 And now my whole night's ruined.

Speaker 10 I actually, other thing I got to tell you, I don't remember who he told me one.

Speaker 11 So he spoiled me, but my brain unspoiled itself because I don't know any of the names.

Speaker 4 I can't keep them straight. That's just your brain operating at a very high level.
It's self-preservation.

Speaker 4 You deflected the spoiling. Hank, when you spoiled it, did you whisper it or did you say it out loud? Because you might have spoiled it for other people on the plane.

Speaker 41 I said it out loud, and Big Cat reacted very loudly. So that's definitely true.

Speaker 4 So

Speaker 30 that's what Mount Rushmore

Speaker 4 of annoying travelers, people that spoil endings to the Bachelorette.

Speaker 36 While eating Chick-fil-A on the flight, that's what he did.

Speaker 14 At least he didn't masturbate like that guy who put a cloth over him and just went fucking hammer time on his penis. TFT, you should.

Speaker 41 So I got Chick-fil-A. The line was wicked long, and then by the time I got it, like our plane was boarding.
And Big Cat and his pride, he was like, Give me some chicken nuggets, and I gave it to him.

Speaker 41 And we could have boarded. And he was like, I'm not getting on there with this.
And fucking shuffed, shoved eight chicken nuggets into his face in like a minute. Yep.

Speaker 30 Yeah.

Speaker 4 In order to decrease the amount of time that he was eating hot food on a plane. Eat it all at once.
Correct.

Speaker 37 And

Speaker 32 he ate zero hot food on the plane.

Speaker 4 Hank, are we confirmed that you didn't pound off while you were eating the Chick-fil-A?

Speaker 30 Yes. Can't confirm.

Speaker 9 You did have a blanket up by your mouth for a long portion of the fire.

Speaker 4 If you're a Chick-fil-A customer,

Speaker 4 you shouldn't be touching guy parts. So it's part of the contract.

Speaker 18 Hank and I were doing the Rain City Jacks on the plane from Detroit to New York City.

Speaker 41 All right, well, so it's a two-part Bachelorette episode.

Speaker 41 Yesterday was the season's finale. This is a recording beforehand.
I'll give you the recap from last night, and then I'll tell you what I know.

Speaker 2 Oh, it was Tennessee Jed. That's who won.

Speaker 30 Yeah.

Speaker 30 That's who he spoiled me with.

Speaker 4 Yeah. What the fuck, big guy?

Speaker 41 At the Rose ceremony.

Speaker 24 We can put that out.

Speaker 3 No, it's fine. No, no, we'll put that out.
It's out today.

Speaker 15 Yeah, but some people don't watch right away.

Speaker 30 Wait. We're going to talk about this.

Speaker 4 We're not doing spoilers in case people have their DVR set.

Speaker 41 Yeah, what?

Speaker 30 What are you talking about?

Speaker 41 That's the fucking point of this show.

Speaker 41 At the Rose ceremony, Hannah sends Pete the Pilot home, leaving Tyler and Jed as the final two. She also mentioned that Pete the Pilot and her had sex four times, not two.

Speaker 30 Whoa.

Speaker 41 So aggressive.

Speaker 4 Well, that just means that he nutted real quick.

Speaker 41 Yeah, so actually that's what I thought too. He must have just been holding it in for like the whole time until that point.

Speaker 4 Is that when we determine that sex has occurred, by the way? Like once the guy nuts, that's one time. If so, that's very sexist.

Speaker 47 Yeah, that's true.

Speaker 1 The woman has to orgasm for it to be sex.

Speaker 30 Yeah.

Speaker 4 Come on. Or lactate.

Speaker 15 I've never had sex.

Speaker 41 Jed meets Hannah's parents, and they're skeptical of his career as a singer-songwriter. They're worried he won't be able to provide for her financially.

Speaker 41 Jed tells them he will be able to support her because he recently made a jingle for a dog food commercial.

Speaker 30 Okay. There you go.

Speaker 13 So the winner made a dog food commercial?

Speaker 7 Mm-hmm.

Speaker 41 So it's tonight, or last night, Tuesday night, it's Tyler vs. Jed.

Speaker 26 Jed wins.

Speaker 41 Jed wins. We don't know what happens, though, because I guess if you're listening to the show and you watched last night, you do.

Speaker 41 But after the show ends, they reveal that Jed wins, but then they show what happens in the months following and whether or not they're still together.

Speaker 41 So you guys can choose what you think if Hannah and Jed are still going strong.

Speaker 14 Are you 100% sure that they will show who wins tonight? Yes.

Speaker 30 Is there a chance that we spoil the world? No. Okay.
No. All right.

Speaker 18 That would have been thrilling. Yeah.

Speaker 30 Fuck.

Speaker 41 Damn it. So what do you guys think? Do you think they stayed together? Keep in mind that Jed was one of the people that had a girlfriend the whole time, and Hannah didn't know that while they were.

Speaker 4 Yeah, what the hell? These couples always stay together for life, right? I mean, Jed sounds like a catch. She'll have all the puppy chow that she'll need for life.

Speaker 4 Yeah, I think these two are going to make it.

Speaker 20 I think they stay together until it's always they do like a people magazine

Speaker 30 story about the couple.

Speaker 7 About nine months later, they're usually living in some really nice Nashville house and they're like, we love our new life and everything's been so great and we just like to slow down a little.

Speaker 16 Our partying days are over.

Speaker 11 It's right when that comes out, they'll break up within a month.

Speaker 4 Agreed. Yeah.
That's when you find out that she's like fucking the safety on the Titans.

Speaker 30 Mm-hmm. All right.

Speaker 41 That's the last one for a while.

Speaker 30 Okay.

Speaker 30 That's too bad.

Speaker 48 Yeah. That is too bad.

Speaker 4 I'm going to miss not watching that show.

Speaker 30 Yeah.

Speaker 16 All right.

Speaker 25 Let's do Respect the Biz for Stephen A.

Speaker 1 Smith.

Speaker 42 Let's play this clip real quick.

Speaker 12 Stephen A. Smith.
What's up, you bona fide scrub?

Speaker 30 How are you?

Speaker 54 I think you're wrong because LeBron is the best player.

Speaker 30 Stop right there.

Speaker 62 Stop right there. Stop right there.

Speaker 62 Don't you ever call up to my show again and open up disrespect to me.

Speaker 62 You don't have a right to do that.

Speaker 62 You don't have a right to do that. Mind your damn manners.
Regardless of what you think about me, you still called up to my show.

Speaker 62 So you will address me as Stephen A. or Mr.
Smith. You won't call me a bona fide scrub and then continue to talk on my damn show.
Do we understand one another?

Speaker 22 Yeah, I got you, Stephen.

Speaker 62 All right, now speak respectfully before you throw the insults. And then you might have a chance to get your point across.

Speaker 30 Now, go ahead. All-time clip, Stephen A.

Speaker 23 Smith, you can say whatever you want on his radio show, but you better address him as Stephen A.

Speaker 1 or Mr.

Speaker 24 Smith before doing that.

Speaker 4 Well, and also, credit to him. He left the door open.
He's like, now, if we get into an argument and you beat me in the argument, then you can call me a Trump.

Speaker 4 I'll take my lumps if you defeat me in an argument, knowing full well that nobody on earth is physically capable of defeating Stephen A. Smith in an argument.

Speaker 4 But I'd like to make the same request of our listeners. And when you call in, please refer to me as either Stephen A.
or Stephen A. Smith.

Speaker 15 No, yeah, refer to PFT as Stephen A.

Speaker 1 and me as Mr.

Speaker 3 Smith, please, whenever you call in.

Speaker 36 Why is he in a sling?

Speaker 4 We don't know.

Speaker 3 I think,

Speaker 4 I don't know if he knows. I think he's like a dog.
Somebody took him to a doctor one day because he was limping around. They put a sling on him.
He's just ignoring it.

Speaker 23 He's just seeing him in an arm sling.

Speaker 18 I don't know what, I mean, I assume it's probably like an ass-eating experience gone wrong knowing Stephen A.

Speaker 1 Smith.

Speaker 18 But it's very funny just like popping open Twitter and seeing a clip of him in an arm sling.

Speaker 31 I love those type of injuries.

Speaker 26 We got to start doing that, by the way.

Speaker 1 We need to just randomly just pick times where it's like, boom, I just have a, I have a cast on my arm.

Speaker 11 Or like, boom, PFT's got a neck brace.

Speaker 24 Just spice up the visual of our show and never give an explanation for what went wrong.

Speaker 4 We did that at the at the Super Bowl. I did a show on a neck brace when I was down there, but I agree, like just an unexplained injury adds a little bit of spice to it.

Speaker 4 It's also possible that Stephen A. Smith injured his arm in a tragic cranking off accident because he's so horny all the time at all hours of the day.

Speaker 30 True, true. Maybe he was a guy.

Speaker 39 Look out for that.

Speaker 18 We're going to big bet ourselves and just slide on a walking boot or a sling or a neck brace at any point in the next six months.

Speaker 21 We're going to do one of those shows where everyone will be like, damn, what happened?

Speaker 2 We should do it together, too, because then they'll be like, wow, did they get in a car accident or something?

Speaker 30 Yeah, you should see the other guy.

Speaker 4 I bet you actually that Stephen A. Smith is just wearing the sling to

Speaker 4 lull Max Kellerman into a false sense of security. Like let Max smell a little bit of blood, and then he'll just take the sling off and be like, I'm fine, you dummy.

Speaker 14 Yeah, he's like Antonio Banderas with his guitar case full of shotguns. He just whips the sling out, and he's got all these facts about LeBron that no one ever thought of.

Speaker 4 He's got an even bigger pair of pants hidden inside of his sling that he takes out and puts on, then dominates him in a conversation.

Speaker 23 All right, let's uh, we got our PMT Sports Biz update from Jake, who's been killing it all summer.

Speaker 15 Let's do that real quick.

Speaker 28 Good morning.

Speaker 63 This is Jake Marsh with the PMT Sports Biz Minute. Tomorrow night, you'll be getting a live slide-in from a certain football color commentator on MBC.

Speaker 63 That's right, we are just one sleep away from the beginning of the NFL preseason. It's the Broncos and the Falcons in the 2019 Hall of Fame game from Kenton with Alan Chris on the call.

Speaker 63 The chief sculptor for the Hall of Fame bust is a man by the name of Blair Buswell. Since 1983, he's made around 100 busts ranging from players, coaches, owners, and even broadcasters.

Speaker 63 We do know that Buswell was not the man responsible for that wacky Ronaldo bust a few years back. I mean, who knows what the heck that guy is up to right now.
The MLB trade deadline is at 4 p.m.

Speaker 63 today. Something that's always fascinated me with some of these deadlines is the player to be named later.

Speaker 63 I'd love to see what goes on behind the scenes with with these GMs, like who has the final say on what players get involved. Big Poppy, Moises, Alou, Coco, that's your PMT Sports Biz Minute, Mr.

Speaker 63 Cat, Mr. Commenter, back to you.

Speaker 1 Last up, we have guys on chicks. Let's finish off the show.

Speaker 23 By the way, just a reminder, Friday, we have Joe Harris on the show, and then Monday, look out for it.

Speaker 36 Training camp week.

Speaker 2 We've already done half of our interviews.

Speaker 17 We're going to get back out on the road next week.

Speaker 2 So look out for where we might be next week for a couple days.

Speaker 41 But we got some we got a good video that's going to be dropping a couple good videos to get you hyped for football finally being back and we've already done a few really really good interviews so get excited for training camp week next week okay i'm a relatively new listener as of the last few months and in that time i've noticed my boyfriend of six years doing something strange He brings up topics that are simply PMT takes regurgitated as if they're his own thoughts.

Speaker 41 The thing is, he doesn't know I listened to the podcast. He never mentioned PMT by name.

Speaker 41 and

Speaker 41 I started listening on my own accord, which is why I found it so odd when his conversations were matching up with each new PMT episode.

Speaker 41 For example, over the last two weeks, he's talked about how prolific NASA's t-shirts are, how he haven't been to Dave and Buster's in over a year, and how Blake Griffin is the GOAT.

Speaker 41 My boyfriend has also been pointing out Tori to Camry's and commenting on how many he sees. He even started a slug bug, Punch War, but with Camrys and called it the Camry Crush.

Speaker 41 I think he's probably doing this because he finds your content relatable and doesn't think I'd understand the PMT references.

Speaker 41 But I have no idea how long it's been going on since I only recently started listening.

Speaker 41 What if the last six years I thought I was talking to my funny, relatable boyfriend when I'm actually just an intellectual in an intellectual relationship with Big Cat PFT and Hank all at once?

Speaker 41 Anyways, my question is this: Should I tell him I've been listening to PMT and I know where he's getting all these takes? Do I keep pretending they're his own thoughts just to give him the ego boost?

Speaker 41 Or should I start bringing up PMT topics before he does just to fuck with them? Okay, thanks for the advice, guys.

Speaker 30 Okay, I've got

Speaker 4 a theory here. This is a tough situation that you're in.

Speaker 4 And what's even more tough is right now, there are probably like a couple of hundred thousand guys that are listening thinking that their girlfriend's talking about them.

Speaker 4 And so, I think what you have to do, you have to tell them.

Speaker 4 If you're the girlfriend that wrote this in, you have to tell your boyfriend.

Speaker 4 That way, all the other listeners can keep regurgitating and stealing our takes and being in a happy relationship and being being very, very secure in that.

Speaker 4 Because right now, there are a lot of people sweating it out.

Speaker 9 Yes, there are a lot of egos on the line here.

Speaker 1 So you specifically need to tell him that it was you.

Speaker 30 Everyone else, just be cool. Play it cool.

Speaker 23 Don't do anything crazy because this has

Speaker 27 the possibility of breaking up many, many relationships.

Speaker 47 So, yeah,

Speaker 20 just be cool.

Speaker 1 Like, don't say anything. Just let him think that he's smart.

Speaker 34 And we'll, you know what?

Speaker 11 We should give you something to maybe bring up to him.

Speaker 1 That's how you can tell him.

Speaker 45 So tell him, we think,

Speaker 2 tell him, hey, honey, I've been thinking, and I think Nate Peterman's going to have a breakout season for the Raiders this year.

Speaker 2 So say that exact line to him, and he'll know when he gets to this point.

Speaker 4 Boom, busted. That's exactly who you got.
Yeah. This is actually, in a weird way, the 2019 plot of If You Like Pini Coladas.

Speaker 4 Just two people don't know that the other person is doing the exact same thing.

Speaker 4 You meet like ships in the night crashing into each other, things will be great. That song ends well.

Speaker 3 Caught in the rain.

Speaker 30 Yep. All right.

Speaker 30 Hank, next one.

Speaker 18 All right.

Speaker 41 There's a lot of dog questions. I'm going to rifle through a few of these.
Sup Dilf Cat, rockin' PFT, and Hank. My new boyfriend doesn't like dogs.
When should I end it with him?

Speaker 4 Yesterday. Well, he might be really into Scouty.
He just might be a huge Scouty fan. And if that's the case, it's cool.

Speaker 11 But yeah, if Scouty, though,

Speaker 5 Scouty's not a cat.

Speaker 20 Scouty's a dog-cat hybrid.

Speaker 1 It's cat dog.

Speaker 15 Wasn't that a show on Nickelodeon?

Speaker 5 Like, that's, you can't consider Scouty to be a full cat because he's just too cool for it.

Speaker 4 Scouty's like a lion that got shrank by Rick Moranis in some weird movie. Yeah, I agree.
Like,

Speaker 4 Scouty is not a house cat, but I agree with Big Cat. If you just hate dogs, that is the biggest red flag there is.
I would rather date a serial killer than somebody that didn't like my dog.

Speaker 30 Mm-hmm.

Speaker 41 Sup boys, my friend met a guy on Tinder and the group chat thinks she shouldn't do a second date. The conversation started with him sending dog memes, totally normal and chill.

Speaker 41 On their first date, they went to a place you can bring dogs and he would drift out of the conversation to point out dogs around them.

Speaker 41 He continued to only text about dogs since then and uses a puppy talk voice in his messages. At one point, he sent her listings for her puppies up for adoption.

Speaker 41 Then he asked her for a second date if she wanted to go to a dog park. This man does not have a dog.
This is too weird, right?

Speaker 23 I think he is a dog.

Speaker 15 I think it's one of those freaky Friday things because if he just keeps looking at every other dog that comes in the dog bar and being like, we need to go to a dog park.

Speaker 50 I got a lot of energy.

Speaker 27 I got to get out.

Speaker 2 This guy is a dog.

Speaker 41 Just throw a tennis ball and see what's going on. Somewhere.

Speaker 1 Yes, somewhere is a dog walking around with this guy's brain in it because they got electrocuted while holding hands.

Speaker 4 Use a dog whistle and see if he reacts. See if he covers up his ears.

Speaker 30 Mm-hmm. Yeah.

Speaker 40 Or just get a dog and become goals on Instagram.

Speaker 4 This also sounds like one of the things that the listeners try to fool us on from time to time, where they send us something that's just a plot of a movie or a TV show that we haven't seen yet, and they frame it as their own question.

Speaker 4 So I'm a little bit woke on this one. I'm not sure if Dog Boy, the dogless dog boy, is real.

Speaker 9 Here's an idea.

Speaker 25 If you are a female listener and you think you're going to break up with your boyfriend soon, get him to get a puppy so that you get at least a few good Graham pictures from it.

Speaker 1 Don't get attached to the puppy, then break up with both of them.

Speaker 4 Yeah, but if you're the guy, then you can do you. This is your only opportunity you'll ever have to do a fake pregnancy scare.

Speaker 4 Just tell your girlfriend that your dog's pregnant, and there will be more puppies coming.

Speaker 50 But that's better for the Graham.

Speaker 4 Yeah, better for the Graham, so she'll stick around.

Speaker 14 Okay, but puppies can't get pregnant, can they?

Speaker 4 I don't know the age.

Speaker 43 Or deep.

Speaker 30 Let's go and ask questions.

Speaker 4 I don't want to think about that.

Speaker 1 Alan Dershowitz probably thinks I can't.

Speaker 4 No, he's written several op-eds. Well, I mean, in dog years, yeah, Alan Dershowitz thinks that you should be able to have sex with a dog once it's two years and one month old.
Constitutional right.

Speaker 4 Yeah, constitutionally. When our forefathers, when Thomas Jefferson sat down, quill in hand, he was like,

Speaker 4 Congress shall make no law abridging the right of a man to copulate with a canine prior to the age of two years.

Speaker 1 Alan Dershowitz asked the very important question.

Speaker 9 Are bestiality laws a little outdated in today's society?

Speaker 4 Well, he wasn't asking the question. He was saying that many people have asked the question, and not that he's advocating for it.

Speaker 23 Including his friend

Speaker 30 who's currently arrested for a pedophile rape.

Speaker 2 Many people have been asking.

Speaker 4 It was so funny the way he framed it because he was like,

Speaker 4 I'm not necessarily advocating for this, but I couldn't help but notice the Constitution allows you to have sex with a 15-year-old.

Speaker 4 He literally couldn't help notice that if one wanted to, that channel should be in there?

Speaker 10 Alan Dershowitz literally did the asking for a friend thing, except it was a whole article seeing if you should be able to have sex with minors.

Speaker 20 Just asking for a friend.

Speaker 36 Named Jeffrey Epstein.

Speaker 45 Fucking scumbag piece of shit.

Speaker 23 All right, go ahead, Hank.

Speaker 2 Hey, guys, especially Dad Cat.

Speaker 41 Last weekend, my boyfriend and I came back to my apartment after a night out. We were both pretty drunk and started doing what drunk couples do.

Speaker 41 I started Sing his D, but while doing so, my drunkenness fucking hot right now. While doing so, my drunk.
That was hot.

Speaker 48 That was hot.

Speaker 30 All right, keep, keep, okay. Uh-oh.
Oh, no. Oh, no.

Speaker 22 Wait, read the first part again so I can remember that.

Speaker 2 Hey, guys, especially Dad Cat.

Speaker 41 Yeah. Last weekend, my boyfriend and I came back to my apartment after a night out.
We were both pretty drunk and started doing what drunk couples do.

Speaker 4 Watch Netflix.

Speaker 41 I started sucking his dick.

Speaker 33 Yes. Ooh.

Speaker 41 But while doing so, my drunkenness got the best of me and I threw up all over my boyfriend's dick and stomach. No!

Speaker 41 I laughed hysterically while he freaked out. Days later, he is still upset about it.

Speaker 41 I don't think it's that serious.

Speaker 4 How do I make it up to it? That's kind of the deal with the devil that you make when you're getting your, when you're the S and of the D is going on.

Speaker 4 Anything can happen at that point because that's like you're at the top of the line right now. So, you know, if you get stabbed, if you get thrown up on, at that point, it's just like, you know what?

Speaker 4 I was getting my DS at the time, so it's not that bad.

Speaker 18 I think he just has to puke in your vagina and then call an eye for an eye kind of thing.

Speaker 42 Like, eye for an eye doesn't really work, but it does in this situation.

Speaker 41 Talk about how your boyfriend should react to your past sex life when they ask. What do you think matters or doesn't?

Speaker 2 The real answer is: don't ever fucking ask, you idiots.

Speaker 31 Both sides.

Speaker 26 That is the quickest way to get into a fight that no one will ever win and that will just give like a heavy feel of resentment in the relationship.

Speaker 10 If you say,

Speaker 15 what's your number?

Speaker 5 Or, hey, that guy, did you used to fuck him? Or, hey, that girl was, oh, I bet you fucked her.

Speaker 36 You're an idiot.

Speaker 30 Don't ever do that.

Speaker 4 Yeah, I would say the correct response when you're hearing about your partner's sexual past is just putting your fingers inside of your ears and just saying, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, over and over.

Speaker 30 Either that. We are sex positive.

Speaker 4 We are very sex positive. Either that or just like write an opinion piece in the Wall Wall Street Journal about how you feel.

Speaker 11 Yeah, we're sex positive, so no sex shaming, but

Speaker 9 it's one of those things where

Speaker 40 every conversation that has started along that path, like, no, no, no, go ahead and tell me, I won't be upset.

Speaker 33 And it's always upset.

Speaker 9 So just know you're not different than anyone else.

Speaker 1 Don't fucking ask and just pretend it didn't exist and move on with your life.

Speaker 4 Or just say something like...

Speaker 4 like give them a number that's astronomically high and then back it down to what the real number well for i think women usually go like 50% of what it is.

Speaker 4 So, like, start out at 5,000 and then say, okay, gotcha. You're not that worried now.
So, because it's, it's much less. It's like 50.

Speaker 30 Yeah.

Speaker 11 All right. That's our show.

Speaker 34 We'll see everyone on Friday.

Speaker 14 Joe Harris, very good interview with him coming up.

Speaker 27 And then Training Camp Week. Football is back.

Speaker 4 Love you guys.

Speaker 4 Don't keep me

Speaker 4 on the

Speaker 4 single

Speaker 4 thing

Speaker 4 to dance around

Speaker 4 with a dream

Speaker 4 I've

Speaker 4 I shake the bone.

Speaker 4 I'll say the pressure.

Speaker 4 I lay the skin on you.

Speaker 4 I make it all true for you.

Speaker 4 It's and my take presented by Bar Stool Sports.