Adnan Virk, Mt Rushmore of Average Things, and Guys on Chicks

Speaker 1 Hey, pardon my take, listeners. You can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube.
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Speaker 1 On today's part of my take, we have Adnan Virke. You probably remember him from ESPN.
He got fired. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Who could have ever imagined that somebody would get fired from ESPN? Yep, but he's a really great guy and a friend of ours.

Speaker 1 And we had an awesome talk with him about what he's doing now, his firing from ESPN, and a little baseball talk for you.

Speaker 1 We also have Hot Seat Cool Throne, the Mount Rushmore of the Most Average Things. I'm very excited about that.
I'm very excited about this

Speaker 1 one.

Speaker 1 I'm kind of excited about it. Whatever.
It's going to be okay.

Speaker 1 Take it or leave it. Bachelorette Talk for guys that don't watch the Bachelorette, even though Hank watches his Bachelorette.
And

Speaker 1 that was a yes. And got

Speaker 1 bits and pieces. Bits and pieces.

Speaker 3 Man, I'll tell you what.

Speaker 4 When you're hungry out there, you start acting like a rookie quarterback in his first game, making bad decisions, messing up the basics, being all out of sorts. That's where Snickers comes in, man.

Speaker 4 That thing is packed. Roasted peanuts, nugget, caramel, milk, chocolate.
It's like the MVP of candy bars.

Speaker 4 And when you bite into it, boom, it sorts you out, gets your head back in the game of life, satisfying your hunger. Remember this: Snickers handles your hunger so you can handle everything else.

Speaker 4 Snickers satisfies, man. That's a winning play.

Speaker 1 Okay, let's go.

Speaker 1 Now in the streets, there is violence.

Speaker 1 And then I love the song of work to be done.

Speaker 1 Low place behind a low washing.

Speaker 1 And then I can't blame all on the sun. Oh, no.
We're gonna rock down to Electric Avenue.

Speaker 1 And then we'll take it higher.

Speaker 1 Oh, we're gonna rock down to

Speaker 1 Welcome to Pardon My Tape. And then by the Cash App, go download it right now.
Put it in the code BarStool. You get $5 for free and $5 to ASPCA.
Today is Wednesday, July 24th.

Speaker 1 And training camps have started. So the random injuries have popped up.
Yeah, who's the first one on the list? I don't know. It's always such a bummer.

Speaker 1 This is the one time, but he's fine. Like, I'm talking ACL.
It's always a bummer. Jules is working on Thumbgate right now.
He's got a brace underneath his glove.

Speaker 1 So we're going back to Tom Brady's old cut that he had, like, where you've got reporters trying to, like, zoom in on his thumb, see exactly what's wrong with it. Michael Bennett.

Speaker 1 Michael Bennett, but not that Michael Bennett.

Speaker 1 Not the other one. No, there's not the other Michael Bennett either.
Not the guy that's running for president and not the guy that doesn't wear shoulder pads. Correct.
The one that

Speaker 1 hurt his ankle. It is such a bummer, though, when you are just scrolling Twitter and training camps have started.

Speaker 1 You're getting juiced up for football, and then boom, like Ian Rapport says, yeah, this guy's out for the year with the torn ACL.

Speaker 1 We're about due, I'd say, like in the next 36 to 48 hours for Jake Butt torn ACL. I hope not.
Don't wish that. No, I'm not wishing on him.

Speaker 1 Trust me, the NFL is a much better place when there's a guy named Butt on the back of his jersey running around making plays.

Speaker 1 But yeah, this is the time of year where you get excited for your team to report to training camp. We get all the training camp stories.

Speaker 1 We'll probably go through them next week when all the camps have reported.

Speaker 1 But there's nothing like those first few pictures of the team out there in their jerseys, and rookies are out there right now, and it feels good, and then boom, an injury.

Speaker 1 One of my favorite parts is when the reporters get to camp for the first time and they get really excited and tweet out the new things that are different in the press areas that change over the course of the last year.

Speaker 1 They got new chairs. They're just excited to be away from their family.
Exactly.

Speaker 1 Finally, and then it will take, you know, probably a month or two of tweeting empty stadium pictures before games on Sunday to be like, haven't seen my family in months.

Speaker 1 Yeah, this also means it is the official start of QB tier system. Oh, yeah.
So the QB tiers rankings are just starting to come out right now.

Speaker 1 We've got the Pantheons, we've got the Diamonds,

Speaker 1 whatever tier system you use, now's the time to really get it cranked out.

Speaker 1 I actually, I did some studies on this, and I believe that the tier system should be more like an hourglass, not like a pyramid.

Speaker 1 Because it seems like there are five or six that are at the top, and then there's like very few that are just perfectly average, and then there are a lot of shitty ones down at the bottom.

Speaker 1 Well, it's, I mean, I always go with my binary

Speaker 1 system where it's guys that can win you a Super Bowl, and everyone else sucks.

Speaker 1 And then just some people suck a little bit less. There's the really good, sucky quarterback.
Matt Stafford is a perfect, he is an elite sucky quarterback.

Speaker 1 But you're like, if you had to ask yourself, could Matt Stafford win a Super Bowl? Answer is probably no.

Speaker 1 And there are a lot of teams that they say, like, we've got our guy at quarterback, but in a heartbeat, they should trade him for some reason. They They should keep this going.

Speaker 1 Matt Stafford, by the way, still a Hall of Famer.

Speaker 5 Definitely. I think he could win a Super Bowl, too.

Speaker 1 Now that he's got a lot of people. Not on the Lions.
Well, that's the problem. The Lions, but now he's got Patricia, a good coach.
When he signed the new contract with the Lions, that was kind of it.

Speaker 1 Where he's like, okay, I'm going to be on the Lions.

Speaker 5 But Matt Stafford in a vacuum

Speaker 1 could win a Super Bowl. Yeah, he's right on the edge of suck.
That's why he's an elite sucky quarterback, because it's like, if you put him in the right spot,

Speaker 1 everything could go perfectly. Yeah, I could see my.
Yeah, you know what, Hank? Matt Saffrica won a Super Bowl. I mean, they won a playoff game with him, right? Yeah.
There you go.

Speaker 1 So I think he's a very good example. Did they?

Speaker 1 They lost to the Saints. No, they lost to the Saints.
That's the game I was talking about. They were Cowboys when they got screwed.
Yeah, they got screwed. They should have won that one.
Seahawks.

Speaker 1 Notice Kit Bayless doesn't keep harping about their loss to the Cowboys. I don't know if they have one.
No, they have. I don't think that they have, but they should have beaten the Saints at one time.

Speaker 1 That was a great game. Yeah.

Speaker 5 Tony Scheffler. 1991.

Speaker 1 1991 is their last one. 1991.
Yikes. Sorry.

Speaker 1 We took a detour on some Lions bashing, and I'm not, I don't like the Lions, but I didn't mean to do this so meanly.

Speaker 5 Lions, Bills, Browns, Dolphins.

Speaker 1 Those are the longest droughts. Yeah.

Speaker 5 27, 23, 21, and 18.

Speaker 1 Well, good news is the Browns are going to win the Super Bowl this year. Yeah.
Destined. 100%.

Speaker 1 Hammer the Browns this year. Yeah, so everyone's got, we got the tier system.
We have the, they're ranking the top 100 players,

Speaker 1 which people get mad about every year. Also,

Speaker 1 that list is way too long.

Speaker 1 100 is too, way too many for anything.

Speaker 1 There should be no list that lasts 100 plus.

Speaker 1 When they announced like 94 is Mitchell Schwartz, I'm like, yeah, Mitchell Schwartz is good, but

Speaker 1 I didn't have to know that he was the 94th best player in the NFL. Oh, I did.
I did. Because every time, you know what? I'll take that back.

Speaker 1 I don't really like the top 100 listing, but I do like the countdowns that they do, where they show like how many days until the season starts using the numbers on the shirts. Yes.

Speaker 1 Like when there was 45 days, I was like James Devlin or 46 or whatever. Different players.
Like I like that because they got to really scrape and claw for some of those like low 50s. Yeah.

Speaker 1 So we can feel it. We can taste it.
We can smell it. I can hear it.
You can hear it before you see it. I'm starting to dream in football.
I had a dream last night.

Speaker 1 I was dreaming just about a college football Saturday where I was losing everything.

Speaker 1 But it was a great dream. I would love to.
I woke up and I was like, damn, that wasn't real, even though I lost all my money. You know how, like, when you watch a team.

Speaker 5 You woke up ready to get back after today to get back to even?

Speaker 1 Right. I was like, oh, it's Sunday.
I'm ready to go. Let's get it.
By the way, did you guys see that every single over hit last night? I didn't bet any of them.

Speaker 1 I did not see baseball after the overweekend that I had because of the heat. The salami hit? The grand salami? I bet the salami, and the nationals game got rained out, so the salami got void.

Speaker 1 Oh, that's too bad. And every single game went over.

Speaker 1 You got to be fucking kidding me, man. That's too bad.
Yeah. You got to be kidding.

Speaker 1 This is what July is. It's baseball taking your will to live.
Like, you bet baseball and you think you'll do okay and it just sucks the soul out of your body.

Speaker 1 It's awful that they just canceled the entire salami because there was a rainbow works.

Speaker 1 It's worked in my favor before, but last night every single game went over. I don't like it.
But yeah, dreaming about betting is knowing that you're ready to get back to the catch.

Speaker 1 That's training camp for us fans. Right.
It's like dreaming about changing the channel at that perfect time. Dreaming about

Speaker 1 right back to that first snap on Fox, getting away from CBS. That's the most.

Speaker 1 Dreaming about the slide-in. I did a slide-in on Leroy on the couch the other day just for fun.
Just to just to make sure that you were in,

Speaker 1 you know, mid-season form. He didn't know what was going on.
He just farted and went back to sleep. Sleeping on my couch.
That's what Al Michaels does these days, anyways.

Speaker 1 Yeah, sleeping on my couch, dreaming about sleeping on my couch with football on. That's what July is.

Speaker 1 Should we do Hot Seat Cool Throne and get to a very,

Speaker 1 very good Mount Rushmore?

Speaker 1 We think. We think.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 It's actually, yeah, I just did that again.

Speaker 1 Hank, why don't you start Hot Seat Cool Throne? Okay.

Speaker 5 My hot seat is Millennials.

Speaker 1 Ooh.

Speaker 5 I'm sure you guys saw this. Pats Fitzgerald did.
This is like a thing that's just going to be a reoccurring thing for the next a million years.

Speaker 5 It's just coaches being like, it's crazy that these kids are on their phone.

Speaker 5 He was at a press conference and he asked why the attendance was down. And his excuse was that he was at a dinner and next to him was four people and they were all looking at their phones.

Speaker 5 So that's why. Northwestern isn't getting tickets at all.

Speaker 1 Correct. They weren't at a football game.
They were out to eat dinner.

Speaker 5 Yeah.

Speaker 1 We don't don't have years and years of data to back up that people don't go to Northwestern football games. Is dinner ruining college football attendance?

Speaker 1 Like all those people in the restaurant, they could have been at a game, too. But it was funny.
Yeah, he said that he wanted to go up to them and just take away their phones.

Speaker 1 Like he was their parents and be like, hey,

Speaker 1 talk to each other. It's a big football game.
I love that. Yeah, that's so psycho football guy.

Speaker 5 Yeah. So, but now that like Pat Fitzgerald is that far into it, millennials, it's just going to be, it's going to happen to every major sport.

Speaker 5 Every coach at the college level is going to go on one of these rants.

Speaker 1 It's going to go viral.

Speaker 5 People are going to be like, oh, this is so true.

Speaker 1 And do nothing about it. I actually think it, I think Pat Fitzgerald is smart with how he's doing it because that's Northwestern football.
Like they're never going to get the top athletes.

Speaker 1 So he doesn't have to recruit to be a player's coach in that respect. You know what I mean?

Speaker 1 Dabbo couldn't do this because those guys can go anywhere. And it's like, are you going to back, are you going to say we can't be on our phones? Yeah.

Speaker 1 The LSU locker room has outlets to plug into the app stations so that you can charge your phone. So it's a sneaky, smart move by Pat Fitzgerald.

Speaker 1 It's basically setting the like the standard is the standard and the standard is you can't use your phone. Yeah, he just wants a bunch of kids that don't have data plans to come to Northwestern.

Speaker 1 By the way, while you say millennials, I watched the first episode of Euphoria last night. I don't want to be a father anymore.

Speaker 1 That's true.

Speaker 1 Can you opt out at this point? Dude, have you watched it? No. I was watching Big Little Live.
It is. It's intense.
It's fucking intense. I heard there's a lot of intense.

Speaker 5 It gets a lot better, but the first episode, I was like, oh,

Speaker 5 I heard the music was great, and then it's like, the beginning is just like fetuses, and then it's just

Speaker 5 extremely heavy to start, but it gets good.

Speaker 1 I've heard that it's confusing. When they go through the girl's phone, it's like Jen Sturger's phone.
It's like just everything dude.

Speaker 5 They go through the dude's phone, and it's Jen Sturger's phone. That's where things get complicated.

Speaker 1 It's bad. Okay.
Okay.

Speaker 1 Yeah, so I won't be watching Euphoria. Yeah.

Speaker 1 It's pretty good, though. It's very well shot.
No, I liked it, but I was just the whole time I was like,

Speaker 1 is this what teenagers are doing? Let's just start a commune where there's no electricity. And we'll just raise our kids there.
Call it Northwestern Phone. No electricity, no vaccines.

Speaker 1 Perfect for you.

Speaker 5 And then my cool throne is Grand Theft Auto.

Speaker 5 So much like the rest of the world, they have adapted to the gambling world.

Speaker 5 And in the new Grand Theft Auto, there is a casino that you can go to and you can pay real money to gamble in this Grand Theft Auto casino.

Speaker 1 I mean, wait, so

Speaker 1 it's actually real. Say no more.

Speaker 5 Yes, today marks the grand opening of the Diamond Casino and Resort, a sprawling entertainment and luxury living complex conveniently located in Vinewood and open to all citizens of southern San Andreas.

Speaker 1 I'm in. I love it.
I love it.

Speaker 1 And I like how there are going to be people that get upset about this, despite the fact that Grand Theft Auto is just a game where you can literally walk down the street and blow people up with a bazooka.

Speaker 1 I'm in. I'm fully in.
Gambling is a bridge too far. This game is full of money.

Speaker 5 There's going to be articles and shit about kids that paid too much money gambling.

Speaker 1 Right. Oh, Grand Theft Auto.
I don't care. I'm in.
I love this game. I'm going to get this game.
Yeah, cool throwing. Yeah.
PFT. This should just be a casino video game.
That's what's next up, right?

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 I mean, most sports books, I mean, I used to play back in the day at like sportsbook.ag.

Speaker 1 They had an animated horse racing game. Always lost.
Such a sucker. But it was fun.
Yeah. It was fun.

Speaker 5 My other cool throne was NASA. I watched First Man last night, and it was

Speaker 1 really? I thought it was kind of boring. Really? Yeah.
I watched it on Sunday.

Speaker 5 I loved it.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Ryan Gosling does a thing that he does every third movie where he just doesn't talk for most of it.
You do that in Drive, and it's like, he just, it's mostly silence.

Speaker 1 He's up in space getting lost. Also, Buzz Aldrin has to be upset about that.
Yes, absolutely. Like, he looked like a fucking idiot.

Speaker 1 And really, it made me realize: like, the only reason you're cool is your name is Buzz, and you went to the moon. Because everything else was just Neil Armstrong's doing.

Speaker 1 Well, he also pissed himself on the moon. But it's, you got to watch because he was the first man to pee himself on the moon.
So, technically, he was the first dude on the moon. That's true.

Speaker 1 But he was not a very intelligent character.

Speaker 5 He was the guy for. And he's kind of of an asshole when he's like, everyone else is thinking it.

Speaker 1 Yeah, right. The dude just died.
Yeah, yeah. Oh, yeah,

Speaker 1 at the house thing. Yeah.
But Buzz Aldrin, Spin Zone, he's famous for now punching that guy in the face. True.
That said, the moonlight landing was fake. True.

Speaker 1 Which is a totally normal thing to do. Yep.
My hot seat is Tom Brady.

Speaker 1 So Tom Brady is firmly on the hot seat as training camp's about to get underway for the Patriots. He went cliff diving.
Hank, you'll appreciate this. He jumped off a cliff into a body of water.

Speaker 1 Probably was hung over. Yep.

Speaker 1 Strawberry. Problem was he held his daughter's hand and she didn't want to jump off, so he just kind of like dragged her off.
And so people are very mad about child endangerment.

Speaker 1 So make up your mind, people. Do you want Tom Brady dragging his kids off cliffs or kissing them open mouth? Like one or the other.
It can never be enough for somebody, you know?

Speaker 1 I was saying before the show that it would be the ultimate troll move by Roger Goodell to suspend Tom Brady for one game after Tyree Kill gets zero. And just be like, hey, there's videotape.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 That's all they need. Technically, like...

Speaker 1 wouldn't be right but it would be fucking funny he was just he was in a free drop it was very similar to an elevator in that way i feel like this was such an overblown story like he the today show was talking it was so stupid like child endangerment he

Speaker 1 his daughter should have jumped they said they counted to three like that's on her i actually say it's more child endangerment because tom brady raised a child that was too afraid to jump that's true that's true don't raise any cowards he who hesitates is lost um My other hot seat is the Arctic.

Speaker 1 So the Arctic is on the hot seat because

Speaker 1 there are forest fires in the Arctic Circle. Oh, no.

Speaker 1 And this is hot. Yes, I love how they describe them.
So there are forest fires in Alaska and in Siberia.

Speaker 1 And the way that it's described online in the article that I read, I think it was on the Independent, it says the ongoing Arctic fires have been most severe in Alaska and Siberia.

Speaker 1 Some have been large enough to cover almost 100,000 football fields

Speaker 1 or the whole of Lanzarote. In Alberta, Canada, one fire is estimated to be bigger than 300,000 football fields.
Damn. So I like how they sound good.

Speaker 1 The way they describe it, though, just using football fields as an analogy, that really makes it hit home for us dumb Americans.

Speaker 1 Okay, now I get it. Yeah, I'm starting to think.

Speaker 1 I'm starting to think we're kind of fucked. We might be kind of fucked.

Speaker 1 When we went 100 degrees in New York City on Saturday and Sunday, and then Brooklyn was literally flooded on Monday.

Speaker 5 And I was driving home on Sunday night, and the skies were like bright with lightning. Like, it wasn't like one flash of lightning.
It was like so much lightning that it was just bright out.

Speaker 1 I just love it. Now, what about what does this mean for bare weather?

Speaker 1 This could be affected bare weather on the hot road for sure. That's true.
30 years from now, wearing no sleeves at a Chicago Bear game isn't going to be that big of an accomplishment.

Speaker 1 Hold on, but 30 years from now, we'll probably have like a 26-week NFL schedule. So we'll play all the way into February.
That's true. So we'll be like in a foot of snow.

Speaker 1 Okay, just keep pushing it back. I like that.
My cool throne is everyone on Long Island's face because it's going to get rocked off on Saturday.

Speaker 1 If you're in Long Island or on side, inside Long Island, whatever we're calling it now, Pup Punk is playing a show at the moment. In Long Island.

Speaker 1 Pup Punk is playing a show at Mulkay's on Saturday night the

Speaker 1 27th. I don't know if it's by the beach.
I think it's like underneath a subway station. Yeah, you thought it was by the beach.
I don't know.

Speaker 1 I don't know anything about Long Island, but I do know it's at Mulkay's and tickets are very affordable and there's still some available. And we've got a a new song coming out tomorrow.

Speaker 1 So stay tuned for that.

Speaker 1 Today, yes, it's the song of the summer and you will love it. That's a promise from me to you.
So I will see you

Speaker 1 in Long Island on Sunday.

Speaker 1 Guarantee. That's a PFT guarantee.
On Saturday. On Saturday.
What did I say, Sunday?

Speaker 1 See you on Saturday and on Sunday because we'll probably play past midnight. Oh, badass.

Speaker 1 My other cool throne is unpopular opinions. They are on my cool throne because people are getting really into expressing unpopular opinions on Twitter.
But the thing is, they're not very unpopular.

Speaker 1 So I did a little unpopular opinion search on Twitter, and here are some of the unpopular opinions that people say. Okay, ready for this?

Speaker 1 Unpopular opinion: all politicians are corrupt and meant to divide us. That's very popular.
That's an unpopular opinion. Unpopular opinion: pineapple doesn't go on pizza.
I think

Speaker 1 a lot of people agree with that as well.

Speaker 1 Unpopular opinion: you shouldn't date your friends' exes.

Speaker 1 Pretty popular. People are really going to opinion.
But if you put unpopular opinion before anything you say, it gets more traction. That's a little life hack for you.
Okay. I like that.

Speaker 1 By the way, did you see that Boris Johnson guy? He's basically Rob Ford. I didn't realize that.
Oh, yeah. No, he is like.
He's hilarious.

Speaker 1 I don't know his politics, but he's hilarious in terms of like, just we'll bulldoze over a little kid while they're playing football.

Speaker 1 The photo ops he gets himself into as a politician are just like out of this world.

Speaker 1 I can't believe that his team, like, he was in one, like, a crane lifted him up, and he was wearing, like a Union Jack suspender outfit.

Speaker 1 I thought it was like a new Ricky Gervais show when I saw some of his gifts. Right, no.
I couldn't believe it.

Speaker 1 He looks like if Ricky Gervais dressed up like Donald Trump and fell into an ocean, they didn't towel him off good enough. Yeah, he's just running around,

Speaker 1 you know, running over kids, tackling people, falling over. The Rob Ford legacy is still alive.
I would actually, I want to take that back.

Speaker 1 He's more like a mix between Trump visually and Jeff Daniels from Dumb Dumber. Okay.
That's kind of the vibe that he puts out. Yeah, and maybe a little touch sprinkle, Mark Davis.
Mark Davis as well.

Speaker 1 Also, his name is Boris, which is just, that always throws you off as a British. It always throws you off.
You're just like, this guy's from Russia. Yeah.
Okay.

Speaker 1 My hot seats is Twitter again because it fucking sucks. The update is the worst.
I don't know why they keep doing it. Why do they keep doing it? Just to fuck with you.
And you know what?

Speaker 1 The worst part is that

Speaker 1 Jack threw the people under the bus. Did you see that big article that was like, here are the three women that are behind the big Twitter update, and they just got roasted on Twitter.

Speaker 1 You can't do that. You can't give us names of the people who made the Twitter update.
Here are the three badass women that did the Twitter update.

Speaker 1 Yeah, do they have one person in any of these companies? Like,

Speaker 1 I will work for any of these companies for $5 million a year. This is an open offer.

Speaker 1 to just be the regular dude who you show it right before you launch it and i can say that's stupid well the the thing is companies like this they have so many employees that they have to come up with projects for them to do.

Speaker 1 Right. If they don't have a project, they're just maintaining the existing website, and then it's like you have to fire everybody because they're not doing anything new.
Right, just keep it running.

Speaker 1 Yeah, just keep it, just keep it running. Just like change the font every now and again.
How about that? That's fine. Yeah.
Give us different fonts. Go back to stars instead of hearts.

Speaker 1 Every now and then. Allow porn.
Have a section of Twitter just for porn. That works too.
My cool throne is police officers, NYPD police officers, because people are throwing water on them.

Speaker 1 To cool them off. To cool them in the summertime.

Speaker 5 Because it's so hot.

Speaker 1 Although, I think they're doing it maliciously. Yes.
Like marathon runner type thing? I don't know. They're just throwing water on them.
It's malicious.

Speaker 1 It's like they shouldn't be doing it, but the effect is that they're getting cooled off. So they're literally on the cool throne.

Speaker 3 I like that.

Speaker 1 Yeah. What about what's the deal with the fire hydrants? What's the law in New York? Can you just open up a fire hydrant at any time?

Speaker 1 I drove by four dudes who are sitting in lawn chairs with an open fire hydrant. It looked like the most fun thing ever.
Yeah, it's like the moose that I was in. They weren't doing it.

Speaker 1 They were in Sprinkler in Canada. They were were just sitting there by the water.

Speaker 1 I want to know what the rules for that are. Like, is that something that just

Speaker 1 can do? Yeah. Or is that, do you have to have like somebody from the public works department and a yellow vest combine to it? I think it's pretty illegal, but also very cool.
Also, very cool.

Speaker 1 It's cooler than it is illegal. Yes.
So go ahead. All right.
We ready to do it? Let's do it.

Speaker 1 We have our Mount Rushmore of the Most Average Things in the World. This is going to be good.
Is it?

Speaker 1 No. I don't know.
It'll It'll be all right. Who is going first? I think I go first this time, right? Me first, then Hank.
Hank is a little nervous. He said, I don't really understand it.

Speaker 1 I'm never nervous.

Speaker 5 Because at the end of the day, it's not about competition. It's just about fun.

Speaker 1 That's true. We're here to lift each other up.
Kings support kings. Are you ready? Let's do it.

Speaker 1 My first average thing:

Speaker 1 I'm going to go with

Speaker 1 Kirk Cousins.

Speaker 1 Kirk Cousins, probably the most average quarterback that these two eyes have ever seen. He will beat every team that is less than 8-8, and he will lose to every team that is better than 8-8.

Speaker 1 He's one of those quarterbacks where if you see he's going to be on prime time, you're like, okay,

Speaker 1 I'm decently excited to watch this game, but you never expect him to do anything great, and guess what? He never does.

Speaker 1 Can I debate it? Okay.

Speaker 1 I think his contract makes him not average anymore. He's got so much fucking money.
I think it makes him more average. No, I think that makes him not average.

Speaker 1 Because it highlights just how average he is. You think that Kirk Cousins is more average than Andy Dalton? Andy Dalton is exceedingly average.

Speaker 1 I think that Andy Dalton was at Kirk Cousins level like two, three years ago, but some of that average shine has been rubbed off on him a little bit. What do you mean?

Speaker 1 He's not, he's lost a little bit of the luster of being average.

Speaker 1 I think I would say Andy Dalton might be more average than Kirk Cousins. I think Kirk Cousins' contract makes it, and the whole like, you know, betting on himself and then having it work.

Speaker 1 That's an average guy doesn't do that. No, I think he's very, very average.
And also, he's still got the haircut. The Doofus haircut makes him more average.

Speaker 1 Andy Dalton, when he got rid of the Doofus haircut and got the glow-up, became less average. That's an average guy move to try to glow up.
No, no.

Speaker 1 And not really successfully do it because you're a ginger. Nope.
All right, Hank. Go ahead.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 Pudding. Pudding.
Pudding. Okay.
Okay. I'm here for that.
Any kind of pudding? Taffioca. Vanilla pudding.
Okay.

Speaker 1 Okay. Good job.
Good job. Good job, Hank.
All right. My first one, my first pick will be, I'm going to go with

Speaker 1 a ham sandwich. Ham sandwich.
Okay. I feel like you don't really get a ham sandwich.
You know, if you get like an Italian, you got to spice it up with the pepperoni and all the other stuff.

Speaker 1 Turkey usually is the go-to. Ham sandwich is like, I don't know.
You just have it. It's okay.
No. It's not great.

Speaker 3 No one gets excited for it.

Speaker 1 You can kind of dress up ham a little bit sometimes when there's honey glaze. Baked ham,

Speaker 1 but a ham sandwich.

Speaker 1 I had turkey sandwich on my list.

Speaker 1 I would say turkey is more average than ham. No, people like people, like, you can get a turkey sandwich that's really good.
But you don't eat the turkey and you're like, oh, this is great turkey.

Speaker 1 But you can have sandwiches.

Speaker 1 You can have great ham. Totally average.

Speaker 1 Dude, turkey is the fucking central point to a whole holiday.

Speaker 1 Okay, my second pick. It is.
Oh, I love to think. I'm sorry.
I'm sorry. I'm sorry.

Speaker 1 All right. My second pick is going to be

Speaker 1 owning a Toyota Camry. Fuck.
Are you serious? You guys had that too?

Speaker 1 No.

Speaker 1 I had Toyota Camrys, just in general. I had Toyota Corollas.
Corolla is the step down. Yeah, but it's more.
Camry's the average. No, Avalon is the elite.

Speaker 1 That's the fucking, you know, the nicest car you can own in the world.

Speaker 1 Corolla is your starter car. Camry is the, like, I'm making $65 a year.
Maybe I got one kid or a dog. I'm feeling okay.
I got my Camry.

Speaker 1 But you get that feeling sometimes when you get in the back of a Camry that you can stretch your legs out. In a Corolla,

Speaker 1 it's always like a little bit of a Camry's evening. No, the fact that it was two versus one kind of settles that you here used to sell used cars.

Speaker 1 If I saw

Speaker 1 Cank and I both had Camry, that's so average. I see a fucking baller step onto my lot.
I'm putting you on a camera. You're still mad about the Kirk Cousins.
Immediately, Camry, you're a right choice.

Speaker 1 I'm talking about Corolla specifically.

Speaker 5 Wednesdays. Oh, good pick, Hank.
The most average day in the day.

Speaker 1 It really is.

Speaker 5 Mondays suck, two-man, Tuesdays, and then Thursday and Friday are basically the weekend. Wednesdays are just like, can't be too good, can't be too bad, just got to get through it.

Speaker 1 Yep, you can't go out on a Wednesday, no ruins the rest of your week if you try. You feel okay,

Speaker 1 but then you're like, yeah, you know, you're not excited for the weekend yet because you still have two more days, and then like Thursday, you're like, all right, it's not even football, yeah.

Speaker 1 Wednesday is like waiver wire day. That's it.
That's all Wednesday is good for. Good pick, Hank.
Thank you. Good pick, Hank.
I like that. So I guess I can't do Toyota Corolla now.
Nope.

Speaker 1 I'm going to go. Starter vehicle.
I'm going to go with U2. The band U2.
Okay. It's perfectly average.
They got some songs that I'll listen to that I won't change the channel on that I won't object to.

Speaker 1 And then they've got a lot of songs that I'm like, what the hell is this? How many more songs can I hear Bono scream about like a polar bear drowning? Okay. So yeah, U2 is like the perfect band.

Speaker 1 Plus, they're the ultimate. The perfect band.
The ultimate dad band.

Speaker 5 Are they the perfect band?

Speaker 1 Are they perfectly average? They're perfectly average. They've got a lot of hits, though, right?

Speaker 1 Yeah, they've got a lot of hits. They've got a lot of clunkers.
And even some of their hits aren't that good.

Speaker 1 I feel like apple wouldn't like put music on your phone if oh yes they wouldn't say the things that i'm thinking i'm not going to say them hank yes they would because they know that they're not going to offend anybody by pre-loading they offended everyone yeah everyone was pissed yeah because they're like i didn't ask for this uh all right what's your next pick all right my next one i'm going to go with uh the winter olympics okay the winter olympics are all right

Speaker 1 you've got uh you've got a couple decent events i guess basketball or not basketball you've got uh you've got hockey okay that's kind of nice okay ski jump can be cool to watch for a a night.

Speaker 1 The problem. Curling's awesome.
Actually, I don't know. No, go ahead.
Hanks, you've got to finish your statement. What are you going to say?

Speaker 5 When there's only two Olympics,

Speaker 5 it's tough to be average when there's only two.

Speaker 1 There's either a good or a bad one. No, just specifically, like the Olympics, the Winter Olympics in general, it's like...

Speaker 1 Okay, I like them.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I kind of... Exactly.
I

Speaker 1 primarily. I'm like, four years? Exactly.
It's nice. It's a special treat.

Speaker 5 Do you like the Summer Olympics or the Winter Olympics more?

Speaker 1 Summer, obviously. If it was every year, I would say, yeah, that's pretty average.

Speaker 5 So Summer Olympics are great.

Speaker 1 Summer Olympics are good. Average.
Winter Olympics are average. Now, when Bob Costas shows up with a pink guy that's looking like he's been going.
What about figure skating?

Speaker 1 You forgot about figure skating. It looks like he's been going Christian Yelich on somebody's ass.
Then I'm fine with that.

Speaker 1 But no, Winter Olympics are just, they're a very average. It's an average event.
But it's only every four years. Yeah.
Okay. It averages every four years.
You're correct. All right.
Hank.

Speaker 5 I'm running out of them.

Speaker 1 I have a shitload.

Speaker 5 I'll go with long-sleeve shirts.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 5 Okay. Something you only want to put on like...

Speaker 1 That's not bad.

Speaker 5 It's not something you go out of your way to put on, but it's like, all right, I don't want to be too hot. I don't want to be too cold, but it's not like.
It's not a deciding factor.

Speaker 5 There's no specific long-sleeve shirt weather.

Speaker 1 I actually, so the only thing I threw on mine is hoodless sweatshirt. You think that long-sleeve, embrace the bait, more average.
Hoodless sweatshirt, long-sleeve shirt. Long-sleeve shirt.

Speaker 1 Hoodless sweatshirt. Okay.

Speaker 1 Hoodless sweatshirts are harder to come by. Hoodless sweatshirt is like, it feels like there should be a hood there.
It's true. I love hoodless sweatshirts.
All right. So my

Speaker 1 tweener outfit. Yeah.
All right. My next pick is going to be, and this, I

Speaker 1 thought about: okay, who is the most average college football team of all time?

Speaker 1 And when I looked it up, I had one team that popped in my head and I looked up at the numbers and it confirmed it to the max:

Speaker 1 North Carolina state football. Okay.

Speaker 1 I looked it up. They are 5'10 overall for their entire history.
510 winning percentage.

Speaker 1 They have

Speaker 1 23 of the last 40 years, they've gone to a bowl game. All the bowl games are like the exact same,

Speaker 1 you know, not good, not great. Like the Gator Bowl, the Sun Bowl, the Independence Bowl, the Meineke Car Bowl.
Like, okay, you had a good year.

Speaker 1 They had one year where they won 11 games in the last 40 years. They haven't won more than 10 otherwise.
Every year is basically 7, 8, 9.

Speaker 1 And then takeout, obviously, Phil Rivers is the exception of the rule, but there are two other quarterbacks in the NFL right now, Jacoby Brissett and Mike Glennon.

Speaker 1 He's a Wisconsin. Russell Wilson.
And I feel like every like four or five years, NC State beats Clemson or Florida State on like a Thursday night.

Speaker 1 So I was going to use the quarterback as a position to dispute the averageness of NC State because of Russell Wilson. Well, he's a Wisconsin.
Because of Phillip Rivers Hall of Famer.

Speaker 1 He was great at Wisconsin. So that's a good thing.
Phillip Rivers.

Speaker 1 Yeah, no, no, I said he's the exception. And because of Chuck Amato, looking if Guy Fieri was a pick crew boss in NASCAR, Tom O'Brien, such an average coach.
I love Chuck Omato with the glasses.

Speaker 1 My next pick is going to be.

Speaker 1 Fuck, this is hard. All right, I'm going to go with

Speaker 1 in the music genre, John Cougar Mellencamp. The most average guy you could come across.
He's not as cool as Bob Seeger. He has nowhere near as many hits as Tom Petty.

Speaker 1 His number one song is Jack and Diane,

Speaker 1 doing the best they can. They're literally average people.

Speaker 1 He wrote a song about average people, and he's from Indiana, and you're like, oh, he must be the most famous person, famous musician from Indiana. Michael Jackson is the most famous Indiana musician.

Speaker 1 So, John Cougar Mellon King. So, but he wrote great songs about average people.
So, for example, he wrote. You're still hung up on Kirk Cousins.
No, no, we're debating. We're debating here.

Speaker 1 He wrote Pink Houses, another song about average people. He's average as a good stuff.
Yeah, he's average as could be. Hurts so good.
Small town. Everything is just average.
He wrote a banger about

Speaker 1 SM. He's as average as possible.
John Cougar Mellencamp. About getting choked out.
He really is that guy you think, like, oh, is he Tom Pay? No, he's not Tom Pay. Well, his middle name is also Cougar.

Speaker 1 Yeah, well, he dropped it, though. I think he's just John Mellencamp now.
He's always the Cougar.

Speaker 1 He's always the Cougar to me.

Speaker 1 I think

Speaker 1 he wrote great songs about average people, like Bruce Springsteen. What do you mean? That's what Bruce did.
That's what the boss did. Yeah, Bruce has hits.
Great songs about average people.

Speaker 1 All right, Hank, your last pick?

Speaker 1 I don't know. Okay.
I'll go with I have one if you want one. No, I don't know.
Please.

Speaker 5 I wrote this down. Law and order SVU.

Speaker 1 That's good. All right, great.
That's a good pick. It's not bad.
It's a show you don't turn off, but you kind of also don't really want to watch.

Speaker 5 You don't go out of your way to watch it, but when it's on, sometimes you watch. Good pick.
You'll go through the commercial.

Speaker 1 It does suck you in sometimes, though.

Speaker 5 But sometimes you just flick right out.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 All right, for my last one.

Speaker 1 This is going to be tough. Good job, Hank.
You didn't have any more than that?

Speaker 5 No. Knees and spring, but I don't even know if that counts.
Knees.

Speaker 1 Just the joint? Yeah. Okay.
Knees, good.

Speaker 1 My last one, I'm going to go with...

Speaker 1 Hmm. This is tricky.

Speaker 1 I'm going to go with

Speaker 1 University of Pittsburgh football. Okay.

Speaker 1 Strike that. Whoa.
ACC coastal football. So you're just taking NC State as a

Speaker 1 both of these on my list. Actually, I think that Pittsburgh is more average than NC State.
Dan Marino.

Speaker 1 I think they won a national title or they went to a national title game. They've had some good players.
National title game over the years.

Speaker 1 ACC Coastal Football is going to be my last one. I think it's a very, very average division.

Speaker 1 Anyone can win on any given year and then get their asses kicked in the conference championship game. Wait, so isn't

Speaker 1 who's in the ACC coastal, though? I'm bringing it up right now. Because I think that

Speaker 3 Yukon,

Speaker 1 Miami and Clemson. Oh, no, no.
Clemson.

Speaker 1 Clemson. Miami is definitely not average, and Virginia Tech is also pretty good.
Even when Virginia Tech is good, they're not that good, though. But Miami? But then you're dealing with...

Speaker 1 So you're dealing with your Georgia Techs, your Dukes, your UVAs, your Pitts, your NCC. No, not

Speaker 1 North Carolina. Okay.
So that's a... But what about Miami? That's a murderer's row of nobody giving a shit about you.
Miami.

Speaker 1 Is the U back? Do you know Georgia Tech's not running the triple option this year? So fucked up. So fucked up.
All right. What else we got? Honorable mentions.
Hank, you got none?

Speaker 5 Wheel of Fortune, Knees, and Spring.

Speaker 1 Wheel of Fortune's good. I had vanilla ice cream.

Speaker 5 Oh, and Jeff Green, but that was from Coley.

Speaker 1 I had Evan Turner. Evan Turner his average points is 9.9 in his career.
He's never averaged more than 14, and he's never averaged less than 7. That's pretty solid.
He's pretty damn average.

Speaker 1 I had 24-hour fitness. Okay.
Very average, Jim. Yes.
Vodka. Okay.

Speaker 1 Mids. What about owning a Labrador Retriever? Yeah, but they're great dogs.
They are great dogs, but it's very average. Very good dogs.
What about Snickers?

Speaker 1 I feel like Snickers is the most average candy bar because it has peanuts, but it's not the best peanuts with Reese's. And it has caramel, but it's not the best caramel with Twix and Milky Way.

Speaker 1 So it doesn't do anything the best, but it has it all. I had Subway, Subway sandwiches.
Yeah. That's good.

Speaker 1 You eat it if you're hungry. I like that.
But

Speaker 1 you would probably just walk past it if there was some other place on the block.

Speaker 1 Bubba sent me Chipotle. Chipotle?

Speaker 1 I was going to say my penis size, but it's not.

Speaker 1 I'm going to go mids.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 1 What about mac and cheese? Above ground pools. Mac and cheese? Nah, I disagree.
You don't think so? I love mac and cheese. Okay.

Speaker 1 Panel. Orange Starbursts.
The best. You like orange the best? Yes.
They're okay. Yeah.
Yeah, they're okay. It's yellow and pink, the best.
And then orange, eh. And then red's terrible.

Speaker 1 No, red's pretty good. All right.

Speaker 1 Indianapolis? Indianapolis.

Speaker 1 I kind of like Indianapolis. Oh, I like it, but it's average because it's not only where all of the test ground for the chain restaurants, but it also has two of the four major sports, not all four.

Speaker 1 Yeah. It's just average.
I've got Bleacher Report, the website. Yes.
Jim Furick.

Speaker 1 Just Jim Furik in general yep that's good and uh what was my last one oh yeah uh the app pandora also good yeah it's pretty average uh did i say brand muffins 5'9

Speaker 1 yeah 5'9 yeah perfectly average that is perfectly average perfectly average height and uh yeah i think that's it all right that was a that was an okay mount rushmore very okay very okay i think there's some good answers

Speaker 1 you guys really swarmed on me on that one well but you know what that's fine that's the spirit of mount rushmore season i didn't say anything about kirk Customer.

Speaker 1 We like to debate things on this show, and you know what? We'll let the audience decide. It's tough when two of the three of us say Toyota Camry and then you insist that it's the Corolla.

Speaker 1 I think the Corolla is more average than the Cryry. Corolla is the starter vehicle.
You can be a baller in a Camry. The Corolla is a starter vehicle.
Put some D's on that.

Speaker 1 The Avalon is the elite luxury. It's literally three classes.
I would say that. The middle is right at Camry.
I made it for that reason. A Hyundai would be the starter vehicle.

Speaker 1 Then you upgrade to a Corolla. I'm happy that I picked that when I did because, man, that was, everyone had the Toyotas on there.

Speaker 1 All right, let's get to our interview with Adnan Verk. When did we take this?

Speaker 3 About a week and a half ago?

Speaker 1 I said some things about Joe Madden. The Cubs have been okay since, so maybe I'll take some of those.
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Speaker 1 Okay, here he is, Adan Verke.

Speaker 1 Okay, we now welcome on a very special guest, someone we've actually done work with in the past. We were on a radio show with you once.

Speaker 3 No, twice.

Speaker 1 Twice? Right out of the gate, big cat. Come on, Jason.
Do you know the boy? You called Jason Kidd on your show as Matthew Kidd. Good memory.

Speaker 3 Here's the memory. So first off, I I met you guys in Miami.
I was there with Rasila for the All-Star Game. It was the first time we met.
We did the show. And then PFT is right.

Speaker 3 When you guys were on at ESPN, you called Jason Kidd on the show. And Jason Kidd was great.

Speaker 1 Let us write it. It was like, no problem.

Speaker 3 We called him a kid.

Speaker 1 I was on Parcel Van Talk. So when the show gets green lit again, he'll be our second guest.
Yes. So that's the voice, Adnan Virk.

Speaker 1 You came with a posse. I didn't know that.
Things have changed. So you're at DeZone now.
You have two podcasts, GM Shuffle and Cinephile, and then you host shows on Dazone, and you have a posse.

Speaker 1 When did that happen?

Speaker 3 I know. It's weird, Fallas.
Like, you guys know me. I'm just a little Canadian, and I love the fact, by the way, on PFT's laptop, he has a sorry right there for me.

Speaker 3 So he's literally put that up there for me. But I just think that if you don't have a posse, like, who are you? Like, in this day and age, honestly, like, just feel like you're...

Speaker 3 I don't even really know these guys.

Speaker 1 I saw them in the street getting 10 bucks each comedy come in here.

Speaker 3 You guys barstool fans? Like, yeah, great.

Speaker 1 That's actually not a bad business model. It's just like Tinder, except just for dudes to roll with you, please.
Yes. Right.

Speaker 3 What's this guy do? I don't know.

Speaker 1 Yeah, he just stands in this room. That roll number looks very important.
Yeah. I'm glad you brought up Dazone right off the bat because we've struggled with the pronunciation.
It's Dazone. D-A-Z-N.

Speaker 1 I've got it now. Dazone? Yeah, it is Dazone.

Speaker 3 And I don't blame it, PFT. You're right.
You see it and you go, is it D-A-Z-N? Is it DAZN? I'm not really sure, but it is Dazone, which I think is different. It's a cool name.
Listen.

Speaker 3 Listen, big cat.

Speaker 1 It's four letters.

Speaker 3 It is. It's four letters.
Still entering the ring.

Speaker 1 It's one round.

Speaker 1 I wouldn't say I'm a fan of it. I mean, it's okay.

Speaker 3 But what about the first time someone said barstool? Somebody who's in a meeting goes, what do you mean? Like, like cheers? Like barstools? Yeah, like how does that relate to sports?

Speaker 3 And then it's like, no, dude, it's great. Barstool.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Yeah.
I guess it's just more the confusion. If you make, if you make something confusing for me, I'm kind of out already.
Well, here's what happened.

Speaker 1 So ESPN, I see four letters, one vowel, ends in an N. Right.
But you say all the letters. And then I see Dazone, four letters, one vowel, ends in an N.
And I'm like, wait, it's not D-A-Z-N.

Speaker 1 I'm so dumb that when it's... It's not dumb.
My brain has been conditioned to say sports networks by letters. So you actually, you got started working at TSN.
That's right. Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 1 And fun fact, people forget

Speaker 1 the T in TSN stands for the. That's perfect.
It's the sports network. Very literal.
Right. I like Canadian.
All right, so how is the zone going? So you have the baseball whip around, right?

Speaker 3 That's right. So change up, which, and I want to talk about your Cubs in a minute.
Okay. I really want to get your thoughts on Joe Madden because this is keeping me up at night.

Speaker 3 Well, this is the thing. So let me just pipe up the show first.
So it's on from 7 p.m. to 1 a.m.
Live look around all the games as they happen.

Speaker 3 And me and Scott Rogowski, who's a legitimate comedian, are on from 7 to 10. And Lauren Gardner, Tony Loffman at 10 p.m.
to 1 a.m. So whip around style, all the games as they happen, which is great.

Speaker 3 Well, what's better than one piece of cheesecake? You got 10 pieces of cheesecake, all the games as they happen, all the best moments, Trout, Machado, et cetera. Let's talk about your Cubs.
Yeah.

Speaker 3 So everyone keeps saying, all right, Joe Madden on the hot seat. And I get the fact that Cubs have underachieved.
And I understand the fact that division is poor. It's obviously a mediocre division.

Speaker 3 But whenever you fire a guy, you have to be able to say, hey, we've got the next man up. Like, who's the one lurking in the wings?

Speaker 1 I think people think it's David Ross. Ryan Sandberg.
No, I see. Ryan Sandberg is not.

Speaker 1 We already passed on. Everyone think Ryano's gonna be the next guy.

Speaker 1 He was gonna be the guy. He was groomed to be the guy.
Yeah, and then he was like, it was a big deal. That worked out.
No, I actually think people think David Ross. I swear to God.

Speaker 3 Okay, if it's Rossi, then I'm all in.

Speaker 1 Well, I think the way that

Speaker 1 the manager position in baseball has moved to now, it's less about the X's and O's because they have so many guys upstairs to do that shit for them. Right.
You know, like Aaron Boone,

Speaker 1 someone basically sets up the whole game for him. He doesn't decide.

Speaker 1 He doesn't have to make these big decisions as much as he did maybe in the past.

Speaker 1 It's a lot more about keeping a clubhouse together and having like, you know, and I think David Ross would be great at that aspect.

Speaker 3 I have to know specifically with Booney to what level it is. If you want me to call him, I'll call him.
Oh, nice flex.

Speaker 1 But honestly,

Speaker 3 I can't picture this big cat. Literally, there's like Brian Cashman.
Like, Booney's wearing like an earpiece.

Speaker 1 He's telling like, okay, Jonathan Holder here. Yeah, I know that.
I think it's a plan.

Speaker 3 It's already in place.

Speaker 1 It's like, when he gets this, do this.

Speaker 3 When this happens, do this.

Speaker 1 It's like almost like a choose your own adventure. So, you know, a book that you're reading every game.
So it's not like you're not making decisions.

Speaker 1 It's just a lot of the decisions have kind of been made for you collectively rather than one person.

Speaker 1 And back to Joe Madden, the only reason that he's quote-unquote on the hot seat is because he doesn't have a contract.

Speaker 3 They knew this was going to happen.

Speaker 1 If you don't give him an extension before this season and the Cubs don't win, aren't on pace to win 110 games,

Speaker 1 there will be spots in the summer where people will be like, are they going to fire him?

Speaker 3 Right. But my question to you as a Cubs fan, do you think Joe Madden is still a good manager?

Speaker 1 I do. I think he's a good manager.

Speaker 1 i do think he i think there's an element of it's it's very complicated but i think there's an element of 2016 even after winning the world series there were some things that happened in that clubhouse that he never fully repaired right the fact he wasn't going to be happy unless arodis chapman's arm fell off right and just not using guys in the right spot and i think there is the element of you know a lot of guys will say to the media that they don't care about how they get shifted up and down the lineup, but it matters to players.

Speaker 1 Like, guys don't like batting in different spots.

Speaker 3 There's an ego issue. I don't want to hit six.

Speaker 1 You're right.

Speaker 1 Exactly. Or it's even that.
It's just like, you know, you get comfortable in a spot. So I think a little bit of that, a little bit of switching out guys

Speaker 1 and playing musical chairs at points.

Speaker 1 I think Joe Madden is a great manager. I think he was perfect for a young team.
Once you get to a veteran team, I think it gets a little bit different.

Speaker 1 I also think that there's an element of, like, I always look at it, if you fire Joe Madden, or if Joe Madden doesn't re-sign next year, he's going to get picked up somewhere else. Correct.

Speaker 1 He's a very, the question isn't, is he a good manager? Because he is a good manager. It's, is he a good manager for this team right now? Right.

Speaker 1 And he's a guy, like, if you look in football, like Marty Schottenheimer used to be, where it's like, yes, he's an awesome coach. Right.

Speaker 1 But if you keep him around the same team for too long, it just becomes like Charlie Brown's teacher going, wah, wah, wah. You kind of tune him out.
That's Phil Jackson. What is Phil Jackson?

Speaker 1 Was it the rule of seven? Was it seven years? That the guys tune him out, and you want to basically change over the entire team. Otherwise, people will just not listen.

Speaker 3 I know some managers, too, who don't like Joe Madden who think that he makes it about himself.

Speaker 1 Yeah, that's what I thought you might do. A little bit.

Speaker 1 Yeah, sometimes that's a good thing. Right, right.

Speaker 3 He takes the pressure off the table because he's funny. He drinks wine.
He tells stories for an hour.

Speaker 1 He brings a magician in. Yeah.
He does all that weird shit. I love that.
Yeah. He wants to see a parent.
All right.

Speaker 1 You can say a million things about Joe Madden if you want to critique him, but the one thing he always does, and I respect, is he never, ever, ever lets his players get the blame.

Speaker 1 He always stands in front of his players and he always, he never, you will never see him take shots at his players through the media, which a lot of managers do. Right.
He never does that shit.

Speaker 1 So in that respect, he absolutely is great for them. He also has a hell of a spin move.
Yeah. Spin move on Joe Madden.
Joe West was not able to. Yeah.
No, you can't.

Speaker 3 Joe West was Jonathan Ogden.

Speaker 1 Yeah. So baseball is, you're covering it every night.
Yeah. We've talked about it, and I think everyone talks about it in the media.

Speaker 1 Like, where does baseball go with none of these guys being like superstars? And it's such a regional sport. You just only care about your team.
Right. What you fix baseball for us.

Speaker 3 So I think

Speaker 1 commissioner for Dave Verk, you do a girl. You've got some ideas that you don't have.
Yes. Steroids.

Speaker 3 Nothing wrong with a juice ball. Get the offensive.
Fighting is a good thing. I think this.

Speaker 3 I do agree that the sports become regionalized, but I feel like I'm still that guy who just loves watching the game.

Speaker 3 Like, I get the fact the all-star game numbers go down every year, but I'm the guy that still loves introduction. I still want to know what all these guys look like with their hats off.

Speaker 3 So I guess I'm not one who's personally reflective of the demographic, which is saying that baseball is not a national sport, because to me, it is.

Speaker 3 Because our show, listen, to your point, Dan, if you're a Cubs fan, you watch the game on WGN, and then after the game, you flip over to change.

Speaker 3 You're like, all right, I already got my Cubs, Cubs, so my regional fix is satiated. But now, you know what? I do want to watch Kershaw and Chris Paddock and Manny Machado, whomever.
So I think that

Speaker 3 I fight that notion of I just watch my team and that's it.

Speaker 3 I do think that happens in this sport more than others, but I do think that, because listen, you could argue that in the NBA, do you really care about the Hawks and the Wizards?

Speaker 1 Well, no, not really.

Speaker 1 I'm a big Wizards fan. You watch for stars.

Speaker 1 I think NBA, you watch for stars.

Speaker 1 And NFL, you watch every game because there's only 16 teams. Because there's only 16.

Speaker 3 College football, same thing.

Speaker 1 In baseball, I feel like you do watch for stars a little bit too.

Speaker 1 Yeah, so you like your regional team, but then, yeah, I would watch Manny Machado get up.

Speaker 1 I would watch Craig Kimberley get into the game and do his weird little dance that he does.

Speaker 1 You're not going to do it for the whole game, but change the scene in just five minutes. I get that.
But it's hard to watch stars.

Speaker 1 It's hard to be like, I can't wait to watch Mike Trout tonight when he could go and have four at bats and two of them could be a walk and a single. Right.

Speaker 1 Like, that's not, and it happens, you know, an hour apart from each other.

Speaker 1 That's the problem with baseball is it is not, it doesn't lend itself to watching stars night in and night out, where you're like, this guy, like in basketball, if you're a bad guy.

Speaker 1 Here's what I think for LeBron James, you know he's going to play 42 minutes. You know, he'll have the ball in his hand.
You know, he'll shoot the ball 25 times. Right.

Speaker 1 When you watch baseball, if you're watching for a star, you might get four or five bats.

Speaker 3 But here's what I think helps. Specifically, change up in the zone, which is fantasy.
Fantasy baseball is still huge, just like football.

Speaker 3 So if you agree with PFT, you still like to watch the sports and you're big into fantasy baseball, then I think it's easy. That's for sure.

Speaker 1 That's for sure. I mean, I gamble.

Speaker 1 so I watch it.

Speaker 3 If you gamble and fantasy, then I think, there you go. That's how this fixed baseball.
More gambling, more fantasy.

Speaker 1 Are they going to be open to gambling, though? Is Manfred, like, everyone talks about Adam Silver being, we always joke on this show, Adam Silver. He's got friends in the desert.

Speaker 1 He has the easiest job in the world because the other three commissioners. are so resistant to change.
Adam Silver can just be like, yeah, gambling sounds like a good idea.

Speaker 1 And everyone's like, damn, Adam Silver, what a fucking forward thinker. Oh, yeah.
He sometimes just changes too much. He goes based off whatever is the most recent Reddit thread on R slash NBA.

Speaker 1 And then he's like, yeah, we're going to implement that. He's out of progressive silver.
That's his name. Everything's going to be.
He's so progressive. Whatever you want to do.

Speaker 1 Saying gambling is good for the sport.

Speaker 1 Having that be like a hot take in comparison to the other three

Speaker 1 commissioners is insane. He's not even saying anything crazy.
He's just saying we're going to grow the pie. So is Rob Manford going to do the same thing?

Speaker 3 I will say, Desone, we're completely in cahoots with Major League Baseball because change up is done in Sekakis. So the studio is there is where we are.
So MLB has been great.

Speaker 3 Rob McLeod, Dave Patterson, the whole team. We have Harold Reynolds on.
We have Dan Plesak on. We have Eric Burns on.
That guy's a nut.

Speaker 3 So I do think that that line's been blurred a little bit. So maybe if Major League Baseball goes, you know what? We're not doing it on an MLB network.

Speaker 3 But if Dazone wants to do it on Changeup, yeah, okay, sure. We're partners, but it's a separate entity.

Speaker 1 Go ahead. You should have Kevin Millar on and have him just do dick talk based on every player that's uploaded.

Speaker 1 Oh, yeah, this guy. Let me tell you about this guy's package right now.
This guy's hung like a lightsweight.

Speaker 3 So before I came here, of course, I did let everybody know, hey, I'm going to go see a big cat PFT. And they're like, oh, great.
Ask him what happened with intentional talk.

Speaker 1 I'm like, yo, I've heard the story. Millar.
I got it.

Speaker 1 So do you work in, you don't work in the same area with the same building. So do you hit wiffle balls?

Speaker 3 I haven't had a chance yet, but I think it's. You had the record.

Speaker 3 So you guys have done it?

Speaker 1 Collectively, we had the record. Collectively.
What was the record? I think I hit it.

Speaker 3 Is it like Glad Jr., 91?

Speaker 1 I took a five.

Speaker 1 We had a total of six. Yeah, with six.
So just say that. It's like I'm like Hank Aaron, and he's my brother.
We had a total of six home runs. Seven,

Speaker 1 Billy Ripkin and Cow Rip.

Speaker 3 Is there a spot here like you got, like where we are right now? If I may say it's nice, but it's a little sterile. Like I was expecting like hoops and stuff.

Speaker 3 And like, do you guys have a bunch of people?

Speaker 1 They're going to have a bunch of pinball machine. Yeah, we're going to press machine.

Speaker 3 And Rasillo comes by this advantage press machine.

Speaker 1 Speaking of Rasillo, specifically for Rasillo. What's it like hosting a show with someone who's actually funny now? Is that nice? Good one.
That's going to hurt Rascillo's feelings. Listen,

Speaker 3 Rosillo is a great dude.

Speaker 1 He is. We like him.

Speaker 3 He's definitely a friend. He was such an advocate for you guys.
Seriously. Before, like, I had met you guys, he was like, no, you guys are going to love these guys.
Yeah. And, right?

Speaker 3 And you know, your image can be for some like, oh, I'm not sure. It's controversial.
It's edgy. What are these guys doing? Ron's like, oh, those guys are great.
Right.

Speaker 1 So he is as big a a fan of yours as you guys are of him um so let's let's talk about some espn sure all right uh you got fired are you addicted to leaking stuff do you have a leaking problem you have a leak problem you have leaked to leak like are you going to just tell everyone what are you going to release this podcast before we even release it no i think in this case that's why these guys are here right they want to make it and it's going to run on awful announcing tomorrow morning they want to make sure that we follow the right protocol like burke cannot be trusted on his own that's when we have my my army here i mean you're addicted to leaking I feel like that type of thing happens a lot, though, like in sports media.

Speaker 1 These websites, they get their skills from somewhere, right? Right. Explain it.
Explain the whole situation. Yeah, why was it different when you're doing it?

Speaker 1 I know you've done it, but give it to us for real. Don't give us the

Speaker 1 Jim Miller,

Speaker 1 Richard Deich, like, let's clean it up. Those guys had your back, man.
That was crazy.

Speaker 3 That's what I honestly have to tell you guys. Whenever this thing happens, and I pray,

Speaker 3 have you ever been fired before?

Speaker 1 Oh, yeah, one time from ESPN. Yeah, that's true.
That's right. We did a good point.
Relatable. Right.
I had a slightly longer story than you guys.

Speaker 1 You guys can't relate to this.

Speaker 3 But like when you're watching everything unfolding, it's like watching your own funeral. Like you're listening to podcasts.
People are talking about Adan was regarded as a good guy. He was willing.

Speaker 3 But I'm still here. I'm making eggs right now for my kids.
I'm still here. I got plenty of hot takes.
I'm ready to go. Yeah.

Speaker 3 And then you hear some people being, of course, if you go online, you go, okay, at best, you're going to go, if it's 50-50, you feel pretty good.

Speaker 3 But I was looking, I'm like, oh, people are more on my side.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 3 He's going to be like, hey, this guy's a good guy. This shouldn't have happened.
And as you mentioned, Jim Miller indices, those guys are running.

Speaker 1 I was like, take it easy, guys.

Speaker 1 I know he shouldn't have been fired, but like, he probably did leak something.

Speaker 1 He's not deep throat here. He's not the Pentagon papers.

Speaker 1 All right, so walk us through it. So you, so tell us the whole story.
Because so people who don't know, like, what, what exactly happened? You've been at ESPN forever. Right.

Speaker 1 The story comes out that it was, what was it, a baseball tonight news that you had maybe talked to someone on background.

Speaker 1 That's the part that sucks that you got fired for fucking leaking baseball news. No one cares.

Speaker 1 It was like the start time, it was like the start time of baseball tonight, right?

Speaker 1 Sore of the worst news ever. I wouldn't have even known that news.

Speaker 3 Well, that's like PFT said, it wasn't exactly the Pentagon paper.

Speaker 3 If you're going to go with the bag, you should probably go up with something a little more incendiary, which made the decision a little more crazy.

Speaker 3 But honestly, like you guys said, I've been there for nine years. I thought I put up a good resume.
I'd done a lot of work on a lot of different shows and had a good time.

Speaker 3 And sometimes, listen, you develop relationships with guys in the media and you just, you know, it isn't thought to be anything nefarious or anything sinister.

Speaker 3 But in this case, USPM was really upset about it, and they just said we're going to part ways. And it's kind of like a marriage in many ways or a relationship, right?

Speaker 3 You're with somebody, something happens, you go, hang on a second, is this that big a deal? And they go, yeah, it is. And you go, I don't understand.
Like, I didn't, you know, I'm sorry.

Speaker 1 No, you're out.

Speaker 3 That was that? Can I, can I get the flat screen TV? No. Can I get a couch? No, we're done.
The marriage is over. See you later.
And you go, okay.

Speaker 1 Was it about the leak itself? Because I feel like leaks happen in this business all the time.

Speaker 1 There are like numerous websites out there that have sources inside, whether it's FS1, whether it's ESPN, wherever.

Speaker 1 Was it the leak, or did you, like, right after you got caught, were you like, no, it wasn't me, and they're like, let's see your phone. You're like, oh, yeah, it kind of wasn't me.

Speaker 3 Yeah, I mean, I think it was the whole situation probably just became unfortunate, and they just didn't like, I don't know, I guess the way that the sequence of events unfolded.

Speaker 3 But honestly, I'm lucky the way things worked out because as you guys know it, this industry is very tricky, man. Like something happens, and all of a sudden you go, all right, that's it.

Speaker 3 This guy's done. He's got a black mark on him.
He's got a scarlet letter. But thankfully, that wasn't the case.
You know what I mean?

Speaker 3 For me, I was just really lucky that John Skipper gave me this opportunity, that Jimmy Horwitz came in and did this. So, honestly, East Penn's a great, a great place to work.

Speaker 3 The last 72 hours were not great.

Speaker 3 You guys know what that's like? Yeah. Getting pulled to plug is not fun.
But,

Speaker 3 you know, it's worked out well.

Speaker 1 So it sounds like it was shocking, though, when it happened. When you were like, wait, this is really happening? Oh, yeah.
Really going down? Traumatic.

Speaker 3 That's crazy. If you look at like Google right now, top five stressors in life, and it's like, you know, death of a loved one, I think number two is like,

Speaker 3 you know, a divorce. But like, getting fired is right there, moving, relocating.
You know, you've got four boys, and you know, we're living in central Connecticut.

Speaker 3 Life is bliss, and all of a sudden, boom, you're out.

Speaker 3 Bam, at Super Bowl Sunday, you're getting boomed.

Speaker 1 Yeah, which is a top trending topic. That was good because it got buried real quick.
Although the Super Bowl sucked.

Speaker 1 Yeah, so everyone's like, let's get back to talking about that.

Speaker 3 PFT, to your point, I thought it would get buried because it was on before the Super Bowl, but my understanding is actually the opposite because everybody was online on their phones tweeting.

Speaker 1 Oh, it's a big day.

Speaker 1 It's a big internet day.

Speaker 3 Oh, wait, what happened to Verick? And the Super Bowl sucked, to Dan's point. Which I think the Eagles should still be champions.
Super Bowl was so loudly.

Speaker 1 The Eagles should still be the champions.

Speaker 1 Was there any element of relief? Because, like, for us, when we got fired, I was like, sweet, I don't have to do that show for

Speaker 1 16 more weeks. Sweatpants on Monday.
Yeah, exactly.

Speaker 3 I mean, there's certain elements that you're like, listen, with ESPN, it's a great place to work, but it does consume your life. Like, work-life balance is not a strength.

Speaker 3 And maybe that's my own fault, just that I was dedicated to the job so much. So, hey, you want me to fill in with Rosillo? No problem.
You want me to do Mike and Mike or Golak and Wingo? Sure.

Speaker 3 In addition to doing baseball tonight, college football, college basketball, et cetera.

Speaker 3 So I think when you're there, because it's so competitive, because the people are so talented, you naturally have it overwhelm your life, which is not a good thing.

Speaker 3 Now that I'm at DeZone, I'm living in Hohokas, New Jersey, 15 miles from Manhattan. I feel like there's a lot more balance in my life, which was not ESPN's fault.
I think it's my fault.

Speaker 3 I just kind of let the job overwhelm me.

Speaker 1 Yeah, yeah. And it doesn't reward you in the end.
If they want to get rid of you, I'm like, all right.

Speaker 3 This guy didn't college sick for nine years. Good luck to you.

Speaker 1 Right. That's true.
You should take your sick days. That's actually the biggest thing.
And your vacations.

Speaker 1 Mank is living proof of that. Do not pass on those because they could fire you at any moment.
Right.

Speaker 3 No one's going to go, hey, he did cut short his paternity time. By the way, did you take your full paternity time?

Speaker 1 No, no, I'm not really. You took an afternoon? Yeah.

Speaker 3 I'm telling you right now, Big Cat, take your time.

Speaker 1 We took a Sunday off.

Speaker 3 What's the paternity time you got here at Barstool?

Speaker 1 I don't think there is a... I think you could.

Speaker 1 I actually, I don't even know. Like, we could, at Barstool, I think I could probably not show up for two months and send a few emails.

Speaker 1 And people, if I kept on doing pardon my take, people wouldn't say anything. Right.

Speaker 1 But then there's a chance that I could show up for one, not one afternoon, and and everyone would be like, where the fuck are you?

Speaker 3 But think about this. You guys worked for ESPN.
Right. I literally was on your first program at ESPN.

Speaker 1 Correct.

Speaker 3 And it was a short stint. But if you were to compare the environments of barstool and ESPN.

Speaker 1 Yeah, that actually is one of the lessons we learned was don't be in a situation where other people can kind of control your destiny.

Speaker 1 Here, we control our own destiny and we make our own content and we don't really have to answer to anyone. Like people always ask, what is the beauty of this place? Like we get to do whatever we want.

Speaker 1 Right. And talk to whoever we want, go anywhere we want.
And I don't think there's many places in the media in 2019 where the creators have that freedom.

Speaker 3 All kidding aside, if I say to you guys, listen, you could have a huge hit show on a USPN, which would be awesome.

Speaker 1 Fuck no.

Speaker 1 No, I've done it. Or do this where literally, PFT, you do whatever you like.

Speaker 3 You do whatever you like. We're giving you zero restrictions.
If you ask an actor, if you asked a singer, musician, whoever, you have zero restrictions. Money's decent.

Speaker 1 Everything's good.

Speaker 3 Or you're in a corporate machine. You're a big dude.
Billboards, but you better follow the company line.

Speaker 1 Oh, equal amounts of money. No chance at all.
Right. I would go anywhere near ESPN for that.
Right now, the job that we have, we set our own schedule.

Speaker 1 Like, the most control that anybody has over our schedule is when we all agree, okay, we're meeting at this time to talk about this weird, shitty idea that we've got that we're going to somehow make work despite itself.

Speaker 1 Like that is the most, that's the most rigid that we get in our day. We don't have production meetings that are set.
We don't have bosses that we really report to. Right.

Speaker 1 With the exception of like if we fuck up at some point, somebody asks us, hey, why'd you fuck up? And And then we tell them. But the sellout money, if you really want to get it.

Speaker 1 That's where it was 10 million bucks. No, no, no.

Speaker 3 I'm going to say, yeah, PFT is the same amount. So let's go the other way.
So that's less money to work here rather than the big corporation.

Speaker 1 If you're talking sellout money, I'd take sellout money. Sell out money.
Yeah, I'll be open about that. Rick Riley, that's where I draw the line.
You start throwing millies around, and it's like

Speaker 1 you have to work.

Speaker 3 I double your salary to major corporations, but they will tell you exactly what to do.

Speaker 1 You guys can dress a different way.

Speaker 3 I want suits and ties.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I don't know about money. I don't know about the suit and tie thing.
I did that for three weeks. Worst three weeks of my life.

Speaker 1 That was right before the Super Bowl. That's why I didn't pay that much attention to you getting fired because I was too concerned wearing a fucking necktie.

Speaker 3 I did get a shout out on your podcast, though. I do appreciate that.
Who's that? After I was fired, you guys said Friend of the Show.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Oh, yeah.
Yeah, well, yeah, we do consider you a friend of the show. Yeah, I appreciate it.
Even though you leak everything. Yeah.
Have you been tested yet at the zone? Have they been like...

Speaker 1 I didn't get out of the room.

Speaker 3 Yeah, no, thankfully they have not. They're put in a strong anti-drug, dude.

Speaker 1 I would make so many of those jokes if you were here. It would be

Speaker 1 dick about it.

Speaker 1 But that's part of friendship, isn't it?

Speaker 3 You can be able to bust a guy's guy's chop.

Speaker 1 You know what? Right now we're not actually recording this. We're going to let you go and we're going to see what you put out there, what turns up online tomorrow.

Speaker 1 And then if there's nothing, then we'll have you back and we'll do the show. It's like an addiction.

Speaker 1 He can't help himself.

Speaker 1 So after the Uber driver told me he'd be here at 11. Really? Did I tell anybody that? Or is that confidential between us?

Speaker 1 After you leave ESPN, I imagine it takes some time to get your thoughts together, figure out what you want to do. I read that you pulled an ultimate fired guy move and you grew a beard.

Speaker 1 Oh, that's nice. That's a great move.
I wish I could do that.

Speaker 1 That's the one drawback to not having good facial hair.

Speaker 3 Let's see if I can find the picture, but I was inspired by lettering because I said, you know what? After 30 plus years of having to shave every day, his first thought was, I'm not shaving.

Speaker 3 That's all I care about. So I went a good three weeks without shaving, and it was embarrassing because it was way too many white hairs.
So I had this crux here.

Speaker 3 Do I dye it like Keith Hernandez did for men?

Speaker 1 I dye my hair. Okay, there's nothing wrong with that, right?

Speaker 3 No, otherwise, I look like I was 57 years old.

Speaker 1 As long as you admit it, as long as you say that you dye your hair.

Speaker 3 You don't tell somebody preemptively. Oh, by the way, hey guys, sorry i just dyed my beard no i think you have to say that you did you

Speaker 3 start the conversation by saying i've done it yeah

Speaker 1 no you have to be like hey just so you know i'm dying my i tell people like hey preemptively before i make a judgment about you they go i dyed my hair okay oh yeah you don't want to be a coach k or like one of these guys who's weirdly got jet black hair late in life it's like just be open about it but at growing a beard to me it was like liberating and then i had to go for interviews and stuff and i was like do i shave the beard do i keep the beard it's kind of like a power journal move having a nice beard like bob lee

Speaker 1 his career. He had the general beard.

Speaker 3 And there was a real stick. When I started ESPN in 2010, that you know, it was like, I don't think it was quite like the Yankees, no facial hair rule, but you had to be somebody special to do it.

Speaker 3 Now everybody has a beard. If you don't have a beard, then people think, What's wrong with you? Did you not get the memo? Do you think Jesse Palmer, by the way, started the trend?

Speaker 3 He was the first guy at ESPN. Went, cool beard.
You know what?

Speaker 1 Because Jesse now engages. He's so damn good looking.

Speaker 1 No matter what he does, you're like, okay, yeah, we'll have that on the air, no problem. Best looking Canadian.
Do you think ESPN is like trying to be more friendly to their talent in that respect?

Speaker 1 That, like, I'm always always fascinated with how the media works and how espn because let's be honest when they when they hired us to do barcel van talk they wanted like the coolness of what we bring right and kind of a relatability that they might not have anymore do you think that they're gonna switch back because there's been a a weird trend where i think espn got lost a little bit and you felt like you didn't you know the big sets and all this technology it's like what we care about is connecting with human beings right i do remember an anchor, I can't remember what it was off hand, but he said something about when they unveiled that set, $100 million set,

Speaker 3 gorgeous set, and the anchors are this big.

Speaker 3 And he goes, yeah, that's ESPN. He goes, nothing's bigger than the brand.
Right. Giant sports are giant ESPN.
The anchors are this big.

Speaker 1 So that was intentional, obviously, is to just be like, hey, we can just change out people left and right, and the brand keeps going on, which I guess is smart.

Speaker 3 Yeah, I was about to say, in that respect, it's like, you don't want to put too much power in the form of labor. Nothing's bigger than the brand, which I think is accurate.

Speaker 3 I don't think anyone gives a damn that I'm not there.

Speaker 1 Hey, no, ESPN's awesome. Yeah, and it's the history of ESPN.
You know, I think the talent did get bigger than the brand at points. Right.
Kilborne. Like Dan Patrick and Kilbourne and Oberman.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 And they were able to squash that. Right.
But it's always interesting to me because I feel like ESPN, for the longest time, it was just they are the worldwide leader. They dominate everything.

Speaker 1 And now in the last few years, it's been like, well, maybe not.

Speaker 3 Yeah. And I think, listen, you guys have proven that.
Other shows have proven that. That listen, personality does count.

Speaker 3 There's going to be people who say, well, nothing's more important than the content. Of course.

Speaker 3 I mean, you're not going to watch a lousy movie if the story's bad, even if it has actors you like, directors, like, et cetera.

Speaker 3 But if you have personalities that like it, would they not enhance the story? Right. Like in late night shows, right? That's a perfect example.
You say, I don't really care about the late night.

Speaker 3 I just want to watch Fallon or Colbert, et cetera. It used to be the tonight show in capital letters, right?

Speaker 3 When Conan was doing it and the fact that Jay wanted to take it back and him and Letterman fighting over it. Now it's like, no, no, I watch Colbert.
I watch Fallon. I watch whomever it is, right?

Speaker 3 So similarly, to your point, I think, Big Cat, you're right, that ESPN is always going to have a leg up. They've been around for 40 years.

Speaker 3 A 40-year-head start, dude. You've done some great things over the ways.
There are obviously a lot of smart people there, a strong infrastructure, et cetera.

Speaker 3 But if you have more personality-enhanced mediums, I think you have a chance, which we do with Dazone, certainly with Changeup with our boxing coverage, your enhancing personalities, that's what you guys do as well.

Speaker 1 Yeah, Dazone, I've noticed that they've done a very good job recently of sponsoring fights that have a lot of blood and crazy knockouts. Like, they're big.

Speaker 1 Like, they get the tweets up on Twitter within seconds of a knockout. So, like, it's

Speaker 1 started to work its way into the subconscious already that, like, okay, DeSona's out here, and they're going to be a player.

Speaker 1 I heard that they are thinking about doing NFL right stuff, too, which would be like going after DirecTV a little bit. Now, that would be huge.

Speaker 3 Well, listen, and to go back to, again, with ESPN, look at how football changed that place in the 80s, right?

Speaker 3 We all grew up with Countdown and et cetera. I remember talking to Chris Berman.
You know, it's so cool. It's funny.

Speaker 3 You think about ESPN, I can't believe I literally met these people, that I was friendly with these people.

Speaker 3 I rode in a car with Chris Berman to the World Series in 2013, and I'm like just geeking out the whole time. Like, boomer, tell me stories.

Speaker 3 And, you know, Chris Berm, when he talks, sometimes like he removes like words, meaning he says, like, he'll just go, people look at me, football, eh, baseball.

Speaker 3 And what he's saying is, people look at me and think I'm just a football guy, but I love baseball. And he's telling me the San Francisco Giants are my favorite team.
Like, I'm a die-hard baseball fan.

Speaker 3 I'm like, really? Yeah, baseball is the reason I got in this business. I'm like, this is Chris Berman.
This is like Mr. Football prime time.

Speaker 3 But he said, listen, at that nexus of time, he realized football was skyrocketing and just jumped on the wagon and go. And that changed the USPN.
Fox Sports was fledgling. 1994, they got football.

Speaker 1 Boom.

Speaker 3 So there's no question. Look, I love baseball as much as anybody.
It's my favorite sport always will be. But I love the NFL.
And if you get the NFL, that changes things.

Speaker 3 So if Dazone gets football, listen, I'd be ecstatic. I'd be over the moon.
I'd be raising my hand. Can I be a part of it? We've got NFL in Canada.
You guys know I'm Canadian.

Speaker 3 I'd love to be a part of that coverage. So, yeah, dude, if we get NFL rights, I'm not privy to the negotiations.

Speaker 1 Anything you'd like to tell us about the ongoing negotiations? Yeah, please cut this part out. Let us know.
Everything. Right.

Speaker 3 I am not privy to those negotiations.

Speaker 1 They've lied. Why not? I'm hardly sure why.

Speaker 3 I think God named it to the table.

Speaker 1 It puts you in a skiff, one of the security groups when they're doing those negotiations.

Speaker 1 All right, kind of a random question. How much did cereal suck for you?

Speaker 3 Well, it was hard because then everyone, and at first nobody knows your name, and all of a sudden they go, wait, you're the guy who murdered yourself.

Speaker 1 And I go, no, no, that's not me. I'm the guy who talks about movies on C-File.

Speaker 3 This podcast I do. So I think it helped in terms of brand awareness.
Yeah. But it sucks when you're not.

Speaker 1 It sucks. Like you have a unique name, and it's like, boom, the next most famous guy with your name

Speaker 1 is the hit podcast murderer.

Speaker 3 Well, here's the other part of it, too. So my name is correctly pronounced Adnan, which is the serial guy's pronunciation.

Speaker 3 But I was literally five years old in kindergarten, and they're doing all the names, and they said my name is Adnan. I go, all right, I'm just going to go with Adnan.
It sounds cleaner. Don't fight.

Speaker 1 Yeah, very Canadian of you.

Speaker 3 Right, very Canadian. And Canadians go with the short A's.
Mike Medano, not Mike Madano. So I'm like, all right, short A's.
So I just always went with Adnan.

Speaker 3 Then serial comes up and they go, it's Adnan. They go, wait, which one are you in the imposter? Is it the killer or the sportscaster?

Speaker 1 We should have fucking done when he got fired. We should have done a free Adnan hashtag brought it back.
Damn it, crossfream. On the cereal music,

Speaker 1 everyone crossing streams.

Speaker 3 The other problem, too, is if you say, My name is Adnan, they go, Adnon, which sounds like a robot.

Speaker 1 You're like, this is my buddy Adnon. Right, right.
Yeah, I mean, that would suck. That's like a nightmare to have some, you know, if there was a big cat who was a murderer.

Speaker 1 Yeah, it's like, well, that sucks. By the way, like when Florio fucks up, I get a little crossfire sometimes.

Speaker 1 By the way, I do like seeing you on NBC. Yeah, there's a notification that comes across your phone.
It's like PFT arrested for hit and run. It's like, don't tear his mic again.

Speaker 3 After listening to Cereal, though, do you guys think he did it?

Speaker 1 I'm so dumb that my brain has been polluted to not know the answers to any questions in modern media now. So, like, the point of that podcast is to just inundate you with both sides of everything.

Speaker 1 Like, the show would not be interesting if it was just very clear that he was railroaded and sent to prison for a crime he didn't commit. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Likewise, the show would not be as interesting if it was very obvious that he did it. So, their job is to make it very even-sided.
So, I think he probably did it. Yeah.

Speaker 1 All things being equal, but I also, I think I'm smart enough to know that I have no fucking idea. He either didn't do it or he's an unbelievable sociopath.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 Because like that part where you get trick yourself, you're like, wait, this guy's really likable. Well, of course, if he's a murderer, you know, sociopaths can be likable.
He's like Patrick Bateman.

Speaker 1 Yeah, right. You can just trick yourself into thinking about it.
But yeah,

Speaker 1 I guess I'd say

Speaker 1 yes. No.
Final answer.

Speaker 1 Your big no?

Speaker 3 No, but I just because we have the same name. Are you kidding?

Speaker 1 Okay, what about you?

Speaker 3 He could go to murdering Spree, I'd still defend him. Like, he's fine.

Speaker 1 Hank, what's your favorite? I can't remember any of the details of the case. Yeah, I'll never say yes.

Speaker 3 I'll say this too. For a lot of hype for that, it was a little long.
Yeah, like I did eight episodes of this.

Speaker 1 And they have the Netflix series.

Speaker 3 I don't need to see this series. And there's a book as well.
I don't need the book as well.

Speaker 1 I got it.

Speaker 1 I don't think he did it. I started to watch the Netflix series and I was like, I can't do this.
I need to go to the bathroom. I'm watching Chernobyl.

Speaker 3 What if they want something more upbeat?

Speaker 1 Like Trinobo. I don't listen.
You didn't listen? Just give me a second.

Speaker 1 You don't have to.

Speaker 5 He's free.

Speaker 1 Innocent. Oh, he's innocent.

Speaker 1 Hank is on the Adnon Innocent Pro.

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Speaker 1 Sopranos, what was the ending? Who died?

Speaker 3 You know, there's this very artistic theory, which I'm going to go with, which is that because the camera, you know, it's all from Tony's POV, right?

Speaker 3 Like, his point of view is he's watching what's happening. And then the last shot, he looks up and it goes to black.
So I believe that David Chase actually whacked us.

Speaker 3 He whacked the audience because we're watching him and we go to black. We can't see any more of the stories.
I think that we get killed.

Speaker 1 I like that. I remember watching that real time and thinking my cable went out.
I think 97.

Speaker 3 You know, I'm one of the few who did not big cat. I was enraged, though.
I said, what a cop-out. I was screaming at David Chase, going, what? Does he die or not?

Speaker 1 Like, that's brutal.

Speaker 3 And my buddy with me was going, no, the cable's like, it's not the cable. It's such an artsy move to not end the movie.
It's unambiguous. It's so for the critics.

Speaker 1 Like, this is exactly what he would do.

Speaker 3 This is what French films did do in the 60s. We're not going to end the movie.

Speaker 1 This is garbage. The last season of Sopranos,

Speaker 1 I felt like deja vu, though, with the last season of Game of Thrones, where if you remember in real time, I remember having this conversation where everyone was so mad because it's like, we need to kill everyone.

Speaker 1 Why the hell are these people still alive? Like, this is, it's so hard to end these shows that you become invested in everyone and you're like, well, everyone's got to die. What the fuck?

Speaker 3 So I bought Jesse Paul with the Sopranos because last year he was like, no, I heard it's brutal. I go, what? He goes, the ending is the worst ending ever.

Speaker 3 He goes, it's one of the greatest shows of all time. He goes, I heard the ending sucked.
I go, I'll buy it for you. Make your own decision.
So he texted me last week, a couple weeks ago.

Speaker 3 He was like, oh, dude, it's the greatest show ever. I'm like, yeah, I told you that.
And he goes, I was just expecting a lot of murder and blood.

Speaker 3 I thought there'd be more of that because of Game of Thrones. I go, well, that's not the way you should evaluate a show.
Which beloved character gets murdered next?

Speaker 1 Right.

Speaker 3 Agatha Christie. This show's awesome.

Speaker 3 But I watched the last two Game of Thrones because I'd never seen the show. I saw the first episode wasn't for me.
I'm just not a big Dungeons and Dragons.

Speaker 1 Yeah. I'm not trying to hate, whatever, not in fantasy.

Speaker 3 But I watched the last two with my wife, and thankfully, she was giving me spoilers because I didn't know what the hell was going on. And all I cared about was Dinklich.
I go, he's awesome.

Speaker 3 I love the station.

Speaker 1 And he was terrible at the end.

Speaker 3 Right. And I go, is Dinklage okay? And he lived.
That's all I cared about. Yeah.
Okay. I lived, and so did Dinklich.
Yes.

Speaker 1 It was a second act for both of us. I would say the, I mean, if we're looking at the best TV show of all time that landed the plane at the end, that actually had

Speaker 1 breaking bad would be like the best with i don't think it can get any better than that with a bullet

Speaker 1 everything felt clear his kids still get the money jesse gets away he's the moral conscience hank does die which i think at that point he doesn't want to die he needed to die yeah he killed the white supremacists yeah right the wire too the wire just because the you know the system rolls on yeah the wire is relentlessly right

Speaker 1 right like relentlessly bleak like i don't want i i don't i can just go to baltimore and see what's happening right i don't know if i need to sit through this show and be a little depressed about my life it is before we let you go do you have any questions for us yeah i brought a gift for you guys whoa i knew what to bring I said, listen, you had Julian Edelman and the big stars here.

Speaker 3 So I brought straight from Canada maple cream.

Speaker 1 Oh, those are really good. Look at those.

Speaker 3 Originally, I was just going to give them to Big Cat because he had the baby, but I said, that's not fair.

Speaker 1 No, we got to share.

Speaker 3 Yeah, well, I should have to have a kid.

Speaker 1 So, we'll share.

Speaker 3 So, maple cream cookies.

Speaker 1 Those are a sex haver. I'm going to have one right now.

Speaker 3 You know, I just think you got to bring a gift. You guys have always been good.

Speaker 1 I'm on a diet, but they look delicious. I'll have one for water.
I started one yesterday. No, I started it.

Speaker 1 No, I'm just trying to.

Speaker 1 Listen,

Speaker 1 it's gotten gotten away from me. It's gotten away from me.
That's the thing, too. Like, in your hypothetical, that if we had to work at ESPN, it'd probably make me lose weight.

Speaker 3 Okay, how about this? Because anything is possible. Yeah.
Right? The famous quote was:

Speaker 3 happiness to seeing Bristol in your rearview mirror.

Speaker 1 Okay, they've had. Who said that?

Speaker 3 Patrick? I can't remember, but it was a former anchor. Okay.
But listen, Keith Oberman did not go on the best of terms, is now back to ESPN. He's been back several times.

Speaker 3 What are the odds? You two are back to ESPN. I go back to ESPN one day? Zero.

Speaker 1 I'm not saying 0%. I'm going to say 1%.
Because if they make us

Speaker 1 president of the entire company, if we end up owning ESPN one day,

Speaker 1 then I will go back and

Speaker 1 I will just program myself onto every show. I would love for them to make me a godfather offer and then I can make it public.

Speaker 1 I can go Adenan on them and just fucking leak it and be like, turned it down. Right.

Speaker 3 And then you don't have proof of that. I'm like, yeah, I do.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 Add-in.

Speaker 1 Yeah, here we go. And so that would be my move.

Speaker 3 How often were you guys actually in Central Connecticut?

Speaker 1 I saw you the one time three times. Yeah, thrice.

Speaker 3 You didn't gain enough of an impression of it.

Speaker 1 I did not fall in love with Bristol. No.

Speaker 1 Now, I've also heard that some people have run into trouble there for accidentally stealing over the course of the years, and that's something that we could find ourselves in some hot water.

Speaker 1 What, like, like office applies? Yeah, well, no, it was either like Mac Brown or Bill Pollyan. Yeah, I've heard both stories.
Snacks from the cat. Snacks, where they mini cats.

Speaker 3 So, listen, those guys are used to programs where literally everything's on the house. Like, I'm going to take that couch on them to like, okay, that's fine.

Speaker 1 Right. You are running the program, right? Yeah, Mac Brown could walk into any store in Texas and just take whatever he wanted off the shelf.
Right.

Speaker 3 So, bag of chips here. Like, is that that really going to be an issue? Exactly.
Like, Tomorrowland didn't do well. Is that on us now?

Speaker 1 Right, right, right.

Speaker 3 Clooney bomb, they'll also be kicking snacks.

Speaker 1 That's not good. I'm going to say 1% just in the event that they would make me like an executive there, and I would just get to debate Stephen A.
Smith. I would go back for that.

Speaker 1 It's behind-the-scenes debate, just for the love of the sport. Yeah, just have him in my realm.
Don't be yelling at him.

Speaker 3 But I'm sure people still ask. They asked me: oh, you worked at ESPN.
What's Stephen A. Smith like? I think that's like when you're removed from it now, you realize that everything is Stephen A.

Speaker 1 Yeah. He's a star.

Speaker 3 Like, you could ask me any question. You know, all the ESPN people I know and was like, oh, just Stephen A.
stories.

Speaker 1 I just want him. So give us your best Stephen A story.

Speaker 3 I think it's, listen,

Speaker 3 I think he's a nice guy, but obviously he plays with the role of trolling and having fun.

Speaker 3 So I'm filling in a mic and mic, and I was smashing Concussion, the Will Smith movie, because I just said it was a terrible film. And he told the truth.

Speaker 1 Yeah, right, yeah. Tell the truth.
Tell the truth.

Speaker 3 Yeah, and he tweeted and he goes,

Speaker 3 he tweets at me.

Speaker 3 I think he follows zero people. He probably like Jay Billis.
He follows one guy, maybe. And Stephen A just goes, yo, Adanian, you're doing a great job filling in.

Speaker 3 But don't you ever come up to my man Will Smith like that with that kind of disrespect. And I'm like, wait, I just got called out by Stephen A.
Smith on

Speaker 3 retweet, like. Can I read this more?

Speaker 3 I want to retweet it once a week.

Speaker 1 Just be like, hey, Stephen A.

Speaker 3 Smith called me out.

Speaker 1 Clown me. Yes.

Speaker 3 Take that verse.

Speaker 1 He's going to get $10 million. Oh, yeah.
And he's going to be worth every penny because he. He works his ass off.

Speaker 1 I talked to somebody that works over there, and they said a very interesting point, which is like Stephen A.

Speaker 1 and Max. Max thinks it's a debate show.
Stephen A. knows it's an entertainment show.
And Stephen A gets it, and he can pretty much name his price right now.

Speaker 3 Especially now, if I said to you guys, what are you watching? You're spending what you listen to, Lebatar's show is hysterical, right?

Speaker 3 Because those guys get it, they know that it's fun, it's loose, and it's great. And as far as live events, like, obviously, I watched Federal Djokovic, I was living in time with Roger.

Speaker 3 Oh, yeah, dude, yeah, dude, I can't believe you're Jokovich is the goat. No, you're brutal.

Speaker 1 I said to you,

Speaker 1 how much does it suck to root for a guy who keeps losing to Djokovic?

Speaker 3 I couldn't believe you said to me, Djokovic is your goat. He is.
Roger's the greatest of all time.

Speaker 1 Okay, but then what happens when he plays Jokovich?

Speaker 3 Listen, weird.

Speaker 1 The guy was 38 years old. How do we end that conversation?

Speaker 3 He's almost 38 years old, and he took him to a tie break, the first ever in the history of Wimbledon five sets, and you're going to call him a loser?

Speaker 1 Like, that was a victory for man.

Speaker 1 See, that's bullshit. Absolutely.

Speaker 3 That was inspiring.

Speaker 1 He's a dope, but he's out there doing it. Yeah, he's two.
Two champions. And he almost won.
Two match points.

Speaker 3 Right a forehand, two championship points. And then the approach shot did not go deep enough, and Jokovich returned.
That's a goat.

Speaker 1 Yikes. He's not even going to have the numbers.

Speaker 3 20 majors. That's the number one all time.

Speaker 1 Okay. How many is Jokovich going to have? Sampers is 14.
Yeah, Sampras, but but his were more impressive. You can make the quality over quantity the better.
No, no.

Speaker 1 Yeah, so everyone says, oh, Federer and Djokovic, they have to deal with higher levels of competition. Nidal disagrees.

Speaker 1 Sampras was just that much better than everybody else that he was playing at the time.

Speaker 3 What is tricky, in all seriousness, is Federer came up when those guys were fading, like Sampras Aggs existed.

Speaker 1 Correct. Yeah, he never had to face Sampras.

Speaker 3 He was early in his career, and now he's late in his career facing these guys at the prime. So it is tricky.
You can't line up Federer's career. It's not like Bird and Jordan.

Speaker 3 They're not at the same time.

Speaker 1 Yeah, Bird and Madison. Yeah, Bird was better.

Speaker 1 That's easy. That's an easy comparison.
Bad comparison, Madden. Djokovic is going to end up with the most Grand Slams and will have a better record against Federer all time.

Speaker 3 Even then, he will be.

Speaker 1 Yeah, he will.

Speaker 3 Here's why. Rod Labor does not have the most majors all time.
But if you ask tennis aficionados, they say Rod Labor's the greatest of all time.

Speaker 1 Well, I don't give a fuck about tennis aficionados. Man, like, I don't even, I've been a tennis fan for one day and I'm already quit the sport.

Speaker 1 I'm not going to U.S. Open.

Speaker 1 It's over.

Speaker 3 But it's like saying Derek Jeter is better than Kyle Ripkin because he has this many World Series championships. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Fair.

Speaker 1 It doesn't go out.

Speaker 1 You can't just go ahead and get it. Good point.

Speaker 1 If you want to go talk live, the Federal is still the best. Yeah, but Joe Vitch will have more.
Kyle Ripkin never earns pennies.

Speaker 3 As if he doesn't. Okay,

Speaker 1 back on the show. Yeah, of course.
And I'll be like, I do not want to talk about tennis.

Speaker 1 You can come back. And I'll be back.

Speaker 1 You can talk cereal. Yeah.
Drink those cookies again.

Speaker 1 All right. Adnan, thank you so much.
Find him on Dazone. Co-host of the GM shuffle and Cinephile.
You can get them both on Apple.

Speaker 3 Apple, Stitcher, all those places where podcasts are found. Perfect.

Speaker 1 Thank you for having me. Yeah, yeah.
Thank you.

Speaker 3 I feel like Briscilla putting a word for me to have me here.

Speaker 1 No, no, no. We like you.
We said, yeah. I don't care what everyone else says about you.
We like you on this show. I got two.
Yeah, exactly. A lot of people say that you're kind of a fucked-up guy.

Speaker 1 Right, right, yeah. Leave everything.

Speaker 1 We're like, no,

Speaker 1 you guys knew my reputation at USDM before I even met you.

Speaker 1 All right. Thanks, man.

Speaker 3 Thanks, guys.

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Speaker 1 Enjoy up to 50% off your favorite Barskill Sports products. All PMT shirts, flags, and hats will be on sale at the lowest prices you will see all year.

Speaker 1 Stock up for the football season with our Football Guys Guy assortment. Go to

Speaker 1 store.barstoolsports.com. Shop these ridiculous deals.
Hurry, the sale is one day only. Tomorrow, that's Thursday, is the one-day-only Christmas in July sale.

Speaker 1 Get your PMT merch while supplies last at store.barstoolsports.com. Okay, let's get to some segments.
Hank, first up, Bachelor Talk for guys that don't watch The Bachelor, but you watch The Bachelor.

Speaker 5 Well, I was watching First Man, so I was kind of in and out of watching.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 1 Fair enough.

Speaker 5 The men tell all episode. So I missed the beginning, but this is what happened.
Luke P showed up to the Rose ceremony with an engagement ring, despite being sent home by Hannah last episode.

Speaker 5 Psycho move. Things almost get...

Speaker 1 That'll work, right?

Speaker 1 When you get broken up with, the best thing that you can do is just be like, hey, we're getting married, right? Yeah.

Speaker 5 Things almost get almost between Luke P and the other guys before Hannah sends him home again.

Speaker 5 That is what Trent sent me. It says things almost get almost between Luke P and the other guys before Hannah sends him home again.

Speaker 5 So I'm guessing this was hot because the second part that I saw, which was like the tell-all episode where it's all the cast come back together,

Speaker 5 it was Luke P and then whatever, the other 20 guys. And the other 20 guys just went down in a line, just roasting the absolute shit out of Luke P.
Like he just stood there. Mike took it.

Speaker 5 Mike called him a narcissistic, cantankerous misogynist.

Speaker 5 And then it was just like the next guy, roast, next guy.

Speaker 1 That sounded like a chocolate milk ad right there. I like that.

Speaker 1 That's nice.

Speaker 1 So, yeah, it's like the, in his brain, that's like when a woman, if she gets broken up with, then she like fakes a pregnancy or she like shows an ultrasound, take me back, that sort of thing.

Speaker 1 In the dumb guy's brain, it's like, oh, you broke up with me. Well, we're actually engaged.
I'm sorry. Let's just get married.
I love it so much.

Speaker 5 And then finally, Hannah had to come out during the telehol episode and address Bachelor Nation like she was like a president.

Speaker 5 And she was like, she had to apologize for not realizing how much of an asshole Luke P was and for keeping him around as long as she did.

Speaker 5 She had to be like, Bachelor Nation, like, I need to tell you this. Like, I'm sorry.

Speaker 1 Bachelor Nation, listen up.

Speaker 1 She's sorry for giving him a platform. Yeah.
Okay. So Hannah P.

Speaker 1 Are we Luke P. Oh, no, Luke P is a kid? Hannah B.
Hannah B, Luke P. Damn.
I get those confused. So what are we down to?

Speaker 5 Last three.

Speaker 1 And who are they?

Speaker 5 Pilot Pete. Okay.

Speaker 1 Jed. Tennessee Jed.
Uh-huh. I forgot the third.
The guy with the sister. The hot guy.
Yeah. Tyler C.
The hot guy. Okay, Tyler.
Tyler C. Which one of these was a quarterback at Wake Forest?

Speaker 1 I don't know. Colton?

Speaker 1 Okay. That sounds right.
I mean, I don't know. I don't know anything about one of the contestants that was a quarterback at Wake Forest.

Speaker 5 That sounds right.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Yeah.
Okay, so we're...

Speaker 5 I think there's two more episodes.

Speaker 1 All right, and then we're done? Yeah. Maybe one.
Interesting. Okay.
Stay informed. I feel like they will draw that out as long as possible.
Yeah, there's probably going to be two more.

Speaker 1 It's always funny on Mondays when you just see all the tweets firing off.

Speaker 1 Oh, yeah, this show's on again. Yeah, it's very puzzling.
It's so lame that people watch that show.

Speaker 1 Like, be a real man and watch three hours of Monday Night Raw just so that Stone Cold can come out for the last five seconds. That's for what I'm talking about.
But yeah, I did that last night.

Speaker 1 Watched literally every second just for Stone Cold. Was it worth it?

Speaker 1 Yeah, I mean, when the glass shatters, it's always worth it. I could see John Cena pulling that move and just

Speaker 1 bringing a ring out. Be like, hey, we're engaged again.
Yes, hey, Nikki Bella, we're back.

Speaker 1 All right. King State Kings, Andy Reid.
So, Andy Reid, when asked what he did in the offseason, what was his answer? He just...

Speaker 1 He goes, well, they asked him if he did anything fun or exotic this offseason. And his answer was, well, I attacked a couple chili rellenos.
So that's classic Andy Reed, that little gourmand.

Speaker 1 That also is great because it's Andy Reid, a fat guy move. Like, he definitely started eating them.
I was like, these are delicious, and then ate them for every meal.

Speaker 1 He's like, I'm just going to keep hammering. Hey, what do you think? What do you want for dinner tonight, honey? What about chili rellanos? I really liked it last night.
And for lunch.

Speaker 1 It's such a perfect Andy Reed food, too, just the way that I can imagine him saying it. It's like kind of festive and a little bit kind of like wild.

Speaker 1 He does a little dance, a little cha-cha-cha, when he says it to his wife. Like, how about a little chili rellanos? It's chili rellano Thursday tonight.
Let's go, honey.

Speaker 1 Yeah, plugging up, plugging, just eating all the cheese to stop the running. Explain it to Hank.

Speaker 5 What is a chili rellanos?

Speaker 1 It is a deep-fried poblano pepper that's filled with meats and cheeses. and sometimes you get wacky with it.
It was like some pumpkin seeds and some sauce around it. Sauce on the outside.

Speaker 1 You put a little creme fraiche on the outside. Just a real treat of a pepper.
But you're eating vegetables. Yep.
Deep-fried. Deep-fried stuffed with meat.
Yeah, but it's still vegetables.

Speaker 1 It's like Mexican haggis. Yeah.
It's like when you get,

Speaker 1 what is it, the tempura, like string beans? It's just deep-fried vegetables. Yep.
Love it. Best way to do it.
All right. Thoughts and prayers to USA basketball.

Speaker 1 So no one wants to play for USA basketball. Yeah, everyone keeps bowing out.
So they're accepting all the good players. Their roster is down to like, who's on it, Hank? Kevin Love?

Speaker 5 Marcus Smart, Jalen Brown,

Speaker 1 Jason Tatum. It's all Celtics.
They just made their fancy Celtics. Julius Randall.

Speaker 1 So now Bill Simmons is going to be the U.S. number one basketball fan.
I have a question.

Speaker 1 Why isn't Mellow? Is U.S. basketball having a moment right now?

Speaker 1 Yeah, Mello should be on it.

Speaker 1 Why not Mellow? You need an old head, right? He should be the guy.

Speaker 1 I want Mello to keep playing for usa basketball forever maybe all these players are leaving because they're afraid that they might miss a call from one of us after what happened to blake last year yes like they don't want to make the same mistake yeah i guess that's probably true uh-huh if they get if they get caught up in some weird award that we made up did blake griffin kill usa basketball People are asking.

Speaker 1 Wow. They're starting to ask.
It's a question. It's a question.
Maybe they just don't want to be invited to the White House if they win. It's a question.

Speaker 1 All right. Last up, before we get to guys on chicks, PMT Sports Biz with Jake Marsh, who's been killing it for us this summer.
Let's kick it to that.

Speaker 9 Good morning, this is Jake Marsh with the PMT Sports Biz Minute. The 2020 Olympic Games in Tokyo are exactly one year away.
And the official emblem is a harmonized checkered pattern.

Speaker 9 It features the traditional Japanese color of indigo blue, which expresses a refined elegance and sophistication that exemplifies Japan.

Speaker 9 If you were to dissect what the PMT logo represents, you've got a mix of loyalty, blue, simplicity is beige, perfection for white, green is is harmony, red equals love, and black, the color of mystery.

Speaker 9 Couldn't have said it better myself. Aaron Boone's rant last week got me thinking: why the heck do baseball managers wear full uniforms?

Speaker 9 Well, in the 19th century, there was something called a captain who determined the batting order, made pitching changes, and more.

Speaker 1 Basically, what we call a player coach today.

Speaker 9 Imagine if other sports did this. Give me Coach O in a helmet and full pads,

Speaker 9 parlayed with Greg Popovich, and a tank. And that's your PMT Sports Biz Minute, Mr.
Kat, Mr.

Speaker 1 Commenter, back to you.

Speaker 1 Wow, that was informative. Great job.
Very cool, Jake. PMT Sports Biz Minute with Jake Marsh.
Jake's been doing a great job this summer for real. Mr.
Cat, Mr. Commenter.

Speaker 1 That's not your content.

Speaker 1 I've been.

Speaker 1 I don't want to talk about Derek McCarthy. No, bleep out that name as a matter of fact.
But okay, can I say it real quick? Don't say his name.

Speaker 1 The Cubs have a player named Robelle Garcia, and every time I go to type Robelle, I think of Rovelle and it it fucking bothers me. Does it auto-correct on your phone? Yeah, and it bothers me.

Speaker 1 That sucks. It bothers me.
Once AI services have figured out that I type in that name,

Speaker 1 at that point, that's when I'm opting out. I am on Fitzgerald's side on this.
It fucking sucks. No phones.
Sucks. All right, guys, on Chicks, Hank.

Speaker 5 All right, Jake sent me these.

Speaker 5 This is a raw run-through.

Speaker 1 Oh, okay. Raw doggies.
Raw dog this bad.

Speaker 5 We'll see how good he's been doing.

Speaker 1 Let's see, Jake's getting skinny.

Speaker 5 Hey, boys, especially Hank.

Speaker 1 I got a spray tan. Oh, yeah, Jake sent you these.

Speaker 5 I got a spray tan this week where you stand naked in a rando tanning salon worker sprays your body with tanning magic. My boyfriend weirded out that I was naked in front of a stranger.

Speaker 5 My response was, it's less weird than being naked in front of my friends. So, can you help my boyfriend settle this argument once and for all?

Speaker 5 Is it weirder to get a spray tan from a stranger or to shower with your friends, i.e., post-sports practice?

Speaker 1 I think it's weird.

Speaker 5 What does I.e. mean?

Speaker 1 Yeah, that's like an example. Like for example.
In example?

Speaker 5 It would be an example.

Speaker 1 That's what it stands for. In exemplar.

Speaker 1 Such as, is what it means.

Speaker 1 Women

Speaker 1 in general, I feel like

Speaker 1 are a lot more comfortable being naked. Well, here's the deal.
There's not as much of a variance on women's bodies as there is on guys. So

Speaker 1 here's what I'm getting at.

Speaker 1 It's easier

Speaker 1 for a woman to look at another woman with her clothes on and be able to tell within a reasonable like distance what she might look like naked in terms of all the size of the different body parts.

Speaker 1 With a guy, if you look at a guy, you can't really imagine, like, sure, some guys like me have big dick energy.

Speaker 1 And so they could be like, oh, yeah, I bet that guy's walking around with a tuna can between his legs. But when it comes to women, you can get a pretty good example.

Speaker 1 Like, I'm looking at you right now, big cat. Yeah.
I have a pretty good example of what those tits look like when you pop that top off. Yeah, right? No, actually, that's not true.

Speaker 1 If you didn't know, you wouldn't know that I have huge nipples. That's true.
Well, nipples are a little bit different. Okay, well, yeah, that's

Speaker 1 nipples are the balls of the chest. They're very different.
Every single nipple is made differently.

Speaker 1 I think it's very healthy for a woman to get a spray tan from a stranger. They're just a lot more.

Speaker 1 Is it weirder for

Speaker 5 naked in front of a stranger and naked in front of your friend?

Speaker 1 I think it's weirder for... I think women, just in general, are more comfortable being naked.
Like, they do it in front of their friends more often. At sleepovers,

Speaker 1 dudes are a little bit more shy.

Speaker 1 The only time guys are really comfortable being naked around other guys is when they're

Speaker 1 making jokes about themselves, busting balls. It's the straightest thing in the world to look at another naked dude and then make fun of him.

Speaker 1 Yeah, or doing the old like when you're like, I got gum on my jeans and it's actually your ball.

Speaker 1 That joke is not appropriate anymore.

Speaker 5 Hey boys, especially functional drug addict PFT.

Speaker 1 I'm just going to ride with it. You got her, dude.
You made me ride with anti-vaccine.

Speaker 1 You can't be upset about it. We both, I put a lot more needles in my arms than your son gets.
Yeah. See?

Speaker 5 My boyfriend and I have been together for two years, and he's a huge Steelers fan. I love him, but there's a huge problem.

Speaker 5 He refuses to have sex with me unless I wear a Troy Palomal jersey and a giant Afro wig. This is not a bad thing.
He only wants to do doggy style.

Speaker 1 Come on, Jake. Come on, Jake.
That's fake. Come on, Jake.
Jake, Jake's fakes. I mean, no, that was a real check because she said, what's up to PFT?

Speaker 3 Yeah, that's Jake's fakes.

Speaker 5 Hey, Big Cat PFT, and Jake. I bet you're all wondering why I didn't acknowledge Hank.
That's where my relationship issues start.

Speaker 5 My boyfriend and I are avid fans of PMT. We listen to every episode, but for some reason, he is intimidated by sweet young Hank.
Crazy, right?

Speaker 5 If I laugh at something Hank says during an episode, it's treated like I just cheated on him in front of his face.

Speaker 1 I believe this.

Speaker 5 I can never agree with Hank's Mount Rushmores, so it's basically a debate between PFT and Big Hat, which is the equivalent to comparing shit to throw up because they're both equally awful.

Speaker 5 How do I get my boyfriend to get over his jealousy for Hank? It's made our relationship very stressful and has almost ruined the podcast for me, which is awful because I consider myself an AWL.

Speaker 5 Thanks very much. I believe that.
Advice would be greatly appreciated from our relationship and more importantly from my love for PMT.

Speaker 1 So how do you get over being jealous of young Hank Lockwood? I think Hank has to shave.

Speaker 1 I think that's really the only way

Speaker 1 the only way. Or we can help your relationship by reminding everyone that Hank can't get hurt.
That's not true. That's true.
He's not. Well, look, hey, I'm not an anti-vaxxer.

Speaker 1 If PFT is not a drug guy,

Speaker 1 You can get hurt. We all get to tell you.
We have to deal with it. We have to tell one lie about everybody else on the podcast that you just.
See how it goes around?

Speaker 5 I guess. Whatever.

Speaker 1 Hank, here's the solution. Hank, just stop being so charming all the time on the show.

Speaker 1 You're a very charming person. And honestly, I get a little bit jealous of you sometimes, too.
I 100% believe this. Because PFT and I are a little older and...

Speaker 1 funnier than Hank. And so when Hank says something, and she's probably right around Hank's age, so he's the attainable one, where we're like

Speaker 1 away out of the world.

Speaker 1 We're fucking stars. Yeah, she might as well wish to go fly to the moon to get with one of us.
But when it's Hank, it's like, oh, yeah, that's just my harmless.

Speaker 1 It'd be like saying you don't care about Vinny Chase because he's unattainable. You're like, oh, I really have the Hotspur turtle.
Yeah. Hank,

Speaker 1 R-E.

Speaker 1 Jill laughed at that one. You watch Entourage, too?

Speaker 1 Yes, she does. Okay.
Hank, say something

Speaker 1 non-threatening. Say something to kind of bring yourself down a peg real quick.
Just help this person. Read a chocolate milk ad.
Yeah, I mean, that's the thing.

Speaker 5 I don't think I'm very impressive on this show.

Speaker 1 It's nice to know that someone thinks so. I want you to tell this listener that you're not going to sleep with this girlfriend.

Speaker 5 I'm not going to sleep with your girlfriend.

Speaker 1 There you go. That should be enough.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 Because you can't.

Speaker 5 Sup, David Busters, guys. My friend and I were debating the other day.
What's the difference between a side bitch and a side piece?

Speaker 1 Whoa.

Speaker 5 Is there one, Jake?

Speaker 1 That's offensive language. That's very offensive.

Speaker 1 Side piece. We don't say that.

Speaker 5 Set me up, Jake.

Speaker 1 Set him up. Bad questions.
Go to the last one.

Speaker 1 Self-development.

Speaker 1 I honestly think.

Speaker 1 That's a terrible question, Jake. I'll tell you what it is.
I think a side bitch. It's the same thing.
What about my side hoe?

Speaker 1 A side bitch is something. What about my slam piece? That you make up if you don't actually have a side piece.
What about my fucking buddy? You're like, oh, I got a side bitch.

Speaker 1 No, that person doesn't exist if you're calling her a side bitch. Yo, I don't even like this chick.
Yeah, fuck her. I just fuck her every weekend and go to the brunch with her.
But I don't like her.

Speaker 1 No. Yeah, her mom's cool.
Oh, man. Her dad is like my best friend.
This totally real Slamho

Speaker 1 Slamho keeps texting you. She's never going to be my girlfriend.

Speaker 1 Sup. Oh, what's up, Dad, Cat, PFT, and Fisherman of the Year?

Speaker 5 Hang on.

Speaker 5 I'm a waitress. See, that's how you know, because I usually try and filter them out because I know when I say myself, you guys are like this on troop.

Speaker 5 I'm a waitress at a well-known restaurant and have recently slept with a guy who is a regular. Turns out he has slept with a lot of waitresses.
Should we confront him,

Speaker 5 refuse him service, or just decline his advances? P.S. It's not David Buster's.

Speaker 1 Okay. Yeah, no, it's Perkins and Tiger Woods.
Yeah, it's a very specific type of game that you have to have to be able to pick up a waitress, too.

Speaker 1 And it's I've never had that because it's like a very narrow timeframe that you have to

Speaker 1 initiate the pickup line, then follow up on it. Well, it's also all that stuff.
Like, there's a specific thing.

Speaker 1 It's a weird sleaze factor because if you are routinely picking up people at restaurants, that means you've probably fucked in your Toyota de Camry multiple times. An awesome car.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 I'll go one step

Speaker 1 because you can afford to eat out at restaurants all the time, so you have a great car. But go to Applebee's with your Toyota de Camry.

Speaker 1 And you watch Andy Dalton. I'm going to take it one step further.
Anybody that routinely picks up on anyone's worst dying.

Speaker 1 If you're picking up women at their place of business on a consistent basis, that's just kind of a weird move, too.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Yeah.

Speaker 5 I mean, it's the whole thing is kind of a legend, though.

Speaker 1 Kind of a legend.

Speaker 1 I mean, insulin. Absolute ledge.
To your friends who call women slam pieces and slam bitches, you are definitely a ledge.

Speaker 1 Big time ledge. My slam piece over at

Speaker 1 Outback. Yeah, she hit me up.
I probably won't fuck her tonight.

Speaker 1 Okay, we'll see everyone Friday. Love you guys.

Speaker 1 Don't kick away.

Speaker 1 I don't know what

Speaker 1 to say. I'd say it anyway.

Speaker 1 Today's a model day to find you shy away.

Speaker 1 Oh, I'll be coming for your love, okay.

Speaker 1 Take

Speaker 1 on me.

Speaker 1 Take on me.

Speaker 1 Take on me. I'll be

Speaker 1 gone.

Speaker 1 Did I create a

Speaker 1 love?

Speaker 1 so needless to say?

Speaker 1 I won't say yes. But be somewhere a little way.

Speaker 1 Slowly learning that life is okay.

Speaker 1 Say after me.

Speaker 1 There's no better to be safe than sorry.

Speaker 1 Drink me.

Speaker 1 Drink on me.

Speaker 1 drink on the aisle. You can't

Speaker 1 to master your dream.

Speaker 1 It's part and my take presented by Barstool Sports.