Adnan Virk, Mt Rushmore of Average Things, and Guys on Chicks

Hey, Pardon My Take listeners, you can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music.
On today's Pardon My Take, we have Adnan Virk. You probably remember him from ESPN.
He got fired. Yeah, who could have ever imagined that somebody would get fired from ESPN? Yep, but he's a really great guy and a friend of ours, and we had an awesome talk with him about what he's doing now his firing from espn and a little baseball talk for you uh we also have hot seat cool throne the mount rushmore of the most average things i'm very excited about i'm very excited about no wait i'm i'm kind of excited about it whatever it's gonna be okay take it or leave it.
Bachelorette talk for guys that don't watch The Bachelorette, even though Hank watches The Bachelorette. And that was a yes.
And guys on check. I watch Bits and Pieces.
Bits and Pieces. We're going to get right back to the show.
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All right, back to part of my take. Okay, let's go.
Boy! Boy! Now in the street there is violence. I'm not Hey! Oh, no, we're gonna rock down to Electric Avenue.
And then we'll take it higher. Oh, we're gonna rock down to Electric Avenue.
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You get $5 for free and five dollars to aspca today is wednesday july 24th and training camps have started so the random injuries have popped up yeah who's the first one on the list this i don't know it's always such a bummer you know like this is the one time but he's fine like i'm talking acl it's always such a bummer jules is working on thumb gate right now. He's got a brace underneath his glove.
So we're going back to Tom Brady's old cut that he had, like where you've got reporters trying to like zoom in on his thumb, see exactly what's wrong with it. Michael Bennett.
Michael Bennett, but not that Michael Bennett. And not the other one.
No, there's not the other Michael Bennett either. Not the guy that's running for president.
Right. And not the guy that doesn't wear shoulder pads.
Correct. Bennett hurt his ankle it is such a bummer though when you are just scrolling Twitter and training camps have started you're getting juiced up for football and then boom like Ian Rapport says yeah this guy's out for the year with the torn ACL we're about to I'd say like in the next 36 to 48 hours for Jake Butt torn ACL I hope not don't wish that I know I'm not wishing on.
Trust me, the NFL is a much better place when there's a guy named Butt on the back of his jersey running around making plays. But yeah, this is the time of year where you get excited for your team to report to training camp.
We get all the training camp stories. We'll probably go through them next week when all the camps are reported.
But there's nothing like those first few pictures of the team out there in their jerseys and rookies are out there right now and it feels good and then boom an injury one of my favorite parts is uh when the reporters get to camp for the first time and they get really excited and tweet out the new things that are different in the uh like press areas yeah that change over the course of last year they got new chairs they're just excited to be away from their family Exactly. Finally.
And then it will take probably a month or two of tweeting empty stadium pictures before games on Sunday to be like, haven't seen my family in months. Yeah, this also means it is the official start of QB tier system.
Oh, yeah. So the QB tiers rankings are just starting to come out right now.
We've got the Pantheons. We've got the Diamonds.
The Elites. Whatever tier system you use, now's the time to really get it cranked out.
I actually did some studies on this, and I believe that the tier system should be more like an hourglass, not like a pyramid, because it seems like there are five or six that are at the top, and then there's very few that are just perfectly average, and then there are a lot of shitty ones down at the bottom. Well, I mean, I always go with my binary system where it's guys that can win you a Super Bowl and everyone else sucks.
And then just some people suck a little bit less. There's the really good sucky quarterbacks.
Matt Stafford. Is a perfect, he is an elite sucky quarterback.
But you're like, if you had to ask yourself, could Matt Stafford win a Super Bowl?

The answer is probably no.

And there are a lot of teams that they say, like, we've got our guy at quarterback, but in a heartbeat, they should trade him for some reason. No, yeah, right.

Keep this going.

Matt Stafford, by the way, still a Hall of Famer.

Definitely.

I think he could win a Super Bowl, too.

You do?

Not on the Lions.

Well, that's the problem, the Lions.

But now he's got Patricia, a good coach.

When he signed the new contract with the Lions, that was kind of it.

Where he's like, okay, I'm going to be the lions and but matt matt stafford in a vacuum yeah could win a super bowl yeah he's right on the edge of suck that's why he's an elite sucky quarterback because it's like if you put him in the right spot everything could go perfectly yeah i could see my yeah you know what ink matt's african win a super bowl i mean playoff game with him, right? They did, yeah. There you go.
So I think he's a very good example. Did they? They lost to the Saints.
No, they lost to the Saints. That's the game I was thinking of.
They lost to the Cowboys when they got screwed. Yeah, they got – they lost to the Seahawks.
Notice Kip Bayless doesn't keep harping about their loss to the Cowboys. I don't know if they have one.
No, I don't think that they have, but they should have beaten the Saints that one time. That was a great game.
Yeah. Tony Scheffler, shout out.
1991. 1991 is our last win.
Yikes. Sorry.
We took a detour on some Lions bashing, and I don't like the Lions, but I didn't mean to do this so meanly. Lions, Bills, Browns, Dolphins.
Those are the longest droughts? Yeah. 27, 23, 21, and 18.
Well, the good news is the Browns are going to win the Super Bowl this year. Yeah.
Destined. 100% going to win.
Hammer the Browns this year. Yeah.
So, everyone's got – we've got the tier system. They're ranking the top 100 players, which people get mad about every year.
Also, that list is way too long. 100 is way too many for anything.
There should be no list that lasts 100 places. When they announced 94 is Mitchell Schwartz, I'm like, yeah, Mitchell Schwartz is good, but I didn't have to know that he was the 94th best player in the NFL.
Oh, I did. I did.
Because every time... You know what? I'll take that back.
I don't really like the top 100 listing, but I do like the countdowns that they do where they show how many days until the season starts using the numbers on the shirts. Yes.
So when there was 45 days, I was like James Devlin or 46 or whatever it was. Different players.
I like that because they got to really scrape and claw for some of those low 50s. Yeah.
So we can feel it. We can taste it.
We can smell it. I can hear it.
You can hear it before you see it. I'm starting to dream in football.
I had a dream last night. I was dreaming just about a college football Saturday where I was losing everything.
But it was a great dream. I would love to.
I woke up and I was like, damn, that wasn't real, even though I lost all my money. You know how when you watch a dog dream? You woke up ready to get back after today to get back to even.
Right. I was like, oh, it's Sunday.
I'm ready to go. Let's get it.
By the way, did you guys see that every single over hit last night? I didn't bet any of them. I did not see that.
No. After the over weekend that I had because of the heat.
The salami hit? The grand salami? I bet the salami and the Nationals game got rained out. So the salami got void.
Oh, that's too bad. And every single game went over.
You got to be fucking kidding me, man. That's too bad.
Yeah. You got to be kidding.
This is what, this is what July is. It's baseball taking your will to live.
Like you, you bet baseball and you think you'll do okay. And it just sucks the soul out of your body.
It's awful that they just canceled the entire salami because there was a rain off. That's too bad.
It's worked in my favor before, but the last night, every single game went over. I don't like it.
But yeah, dreaming about betting is, is knowing that like you're ready to get back ready to go that's training camp for us fans right it's like i dreaming about changing the channel at that perfect time dreaming about sitting on my couch right back to that first snap on fox getting away from cbs that's the most that's dreaming about the slide in yeah i did a slide in on leroy on the couch the other day just for fun just to just to make sure that you were in in uh you know mid-season form he didn't know what was going on he just farted and went back to sleep sleeping on my couch that's what Al Michaels does these days anyways yeah sleeping on my couch dreaming about sleeping on my couch with football on that's what July is uh should we do hot seat cool throne and get to a very very good Mount Rushmore we think we think yeah it's Actually, I just did that again. Hank, why don't you start Hot Seat Coulteron? Okay.
My Hot Seat is Millennials. I'm sure you guys saw this.
Pat Fitzgerald did. This is like a thing that's just going to be a reoccurring thing for the next a million years.
It's just coaches being like, it's crazy that these kids are on their phone. He was a, he was at a press conference and he asked like why the attendance was down.
And his excuse was that he was at a dinner and next to him was four people and they were all looking at their phones. So that's why Northwestern isn't getting tickets.
Correct. They weren't at a football game.
They were out to eat dinner. Yeah.
We don't have years and years of data to back up that people don't go to Northwestern football games. Is dinner ruining college football attendance? Like all those people in the restaurant that could have been at a game too.
But it was funny. Yeah, he said that he wanted to go up to them and just take away their phones like he was their parents and be like, hey, talk to each other.
It's a big football game. I love that.
Yeah, that's so psycho football guy. Yeah, but now that like Pat Fitzgerald is that far into it, millennials, it's going to's gonna happen to every major sport every coach like at the college level is gonna go on one of these rants well viral people are like oh this is so true but do nothing about it i actually think it i think pat fitgerald is smart with how he's doing it because that's northwestern football like they're never gonna get the top athletes so he doesn't have to recruit to like be a player's coach in that respect you know what i mean uh dabbo couldn't do this because those guys can go anywhere and it's like are you gonna bat are you gonna say we can't be on our phones yeah the lsu locker room has outlets to plug into the app stations so that you can charge your phone so the sneaky smart move by pat fitzschild it's basically setting the like the standard is the standard and the standard is you can't use your phone yeah he just wants a bunch of kids that don't have data plans to come to Northwestern.
By the way, while you say millennials, I watched the first episode of Euphoria last night. I don't want to be a father anymore.
That's just fucked up. Can you opt out at this point? Dude, have you watched it? No.
I was watching Big Little Lies. It is.
It's intense. It's fucking intense.
I heard there's a lot of dicks. It gets a lot better, but the first episode, I was like, oh, I heard the music was great, and then it's like, the beginning is just like fetuses, and then it's just, it's extremely heavy to start, but it gets good.
I've heard that, like, when they go through the girl's phone, it's like Jen Sturger's phone, it's like, just. Everything, dude.
It's the worst. They go through the dude's phone, and it's Jen Sturger's phone.
That's where things get complicated. It's bad.
Okay. Okay.
So, yeah. So I won't be watching you for you.
Yeah. It's pretty good though.
It's very well shot. No, I liked it, but I was just the whole time I was like, I, this is, is this what is like teenagers are doing? Let's just start a commune where there's no electricity and we'll just raise our kids there.
Call it Northwestern. No electricity, no vaccines.
Perfect Perfect for you. That's good for me, yeah.
My cool throne is Grand Theft Auto. So much like the rest of the world, they have adapted to the gambling world.
And in the new Grand Theft Auto, there is a casino that you can go to and you can pay real money to gamble in this Grand Theft Auto casino. I'm in.
Wait, so it's actually real. Say no more.
Today marks the grand opening of the Diamond Casino and Resort, a sprawling entertainment and luxury living compacts, conveniently located in Vinewood and open to all citizens of southern San Andreas. I'm in.
I love it. I love it.
And I like how there are going to be people that get upset about this, despite the fact that Grand Theft Auto is just a game where you can literally walk down the street and blow people up with a bazooka. I'm in.
I'm fully in. Gambling is a bridge too far.
This game sounds awesome. There's going to be articles and shit about kids that paid too much money gambling.
Right. I don't care.
I'm in. I love this game.
I'm going to get this game. Yeah.
Cool throne. Yeah.
This should just be a casino video game. That's what's next up, right? Yeah.
I mean, most sportsbooks, I mean,

I used to play back in the day at like sportsbook.ag. They

had an animated horse racing game.

Always lost. Such a sucker.
But it was fun.

Yeah. It was fun.
My other cool throne was NASA.

I watched First Man last night, and it

was fucking awesome. I did too.
Really?

I thought it was kind of boring. Really? Yeah.

I watched it on Sunday. I loved it.

Yeah. Ryan Gosling does a thing that he does every

like third movie where he just doesn't talk for most

of it. Yeah.
You do that in Drive, and it's like

Thank you. That was kind of boring.
Really? Yeah. I watched it on Sunday.
I loved it. Yeah.
Ryan Gosling does a thing that he does every third movie where he just doesn't talk for most of it. Yeah.
You do that in Drive, and it's mostly silence. He's up in space getting lost.
Also, Buzz Aldrin has to be upset about that movie. Yes.
He looked like a fucking idiot. And really, it made me realize the only reason you're cool is your name is Buzz, and you went to the moon.
Because, everything else was just Neil Armstrong's doing. Well, he also pissed himself on the moon, but it's, you got to watch.
He was the first man to pee himself on the moon. So technically he was the first dude on the moon.
That's true. But he, he was not a very intelligent character.
He was the guy. And he's kind of an asshole.
And he's like, everyone else is thinking it. Yeah.
Right. The dude just died.
Yeah, yeah. Oh, yeah, at the house thing.
Yeah. But Buzz Aldrin, spin zone, he's famous for now punching that guy in the face.
True. That said the moon landing was fake.
True. Which is a totally normal thing to do.
Yep. My hot seat is Tom Brady.
So Tom Brady is firmly on the hot seat as training camp's about to get underway for the Patriots. He went cliff diving.
Hank, you'll appreciate this. He jumped off a cliff into a body of water.
Probably was hungover. Yeah, probably.
Problem was he held his daughter's hand, and she didn't want to jump off, so he just kind of dragged her off. And so people are very mad about child endangerment.
Make up your mind, people. Do you want Tom Brady dragging his kids off cliffs or kissing him open mouth? one or the other it can never be enough for somebody you know i i was saying before the show that it would be the ultimate troll move by roger goodell to suspend tom brady for one game after tyree kill gets zero and just be like hey there's videotape yeah that's all that's all they need technically like wouldn't be right but it would be fucking funny he was just he was in a free drop it was very similar to an elevator in that way i feel like this was such an overblown story like he the today show was talking it was so stupid like child endangerment he his daughter should have jumped they said they counted to three like that's on her i actually say it's more child endangerment because tom brady raised a child that was too afraid to jump.
That's true. That's true.
Don't raise any cowards. He who hesitates is lost.
My other hot seat is the Arctic. So the Arctic is on the hot seat because there are forest fires in the Arctic Circle.
Oh, nice. What? Yes.
I love how they describe them. So there are forest fires in Alaska and in Siberia.

And the way that it's described online in the article that I read, I think it was on the Independent,

it says, the ongoing Arctic fires have been most severe in Alaska and Siberia.

Some have been large enough to cover almost 100,000 football fields.

Woo!

Or the whole of Lanzarote. In Alberta, Canada, one fire is estimated to be bigger than 300,000 football fields or the whole of lands a wrote in alberta canada one fire is estimated to be bigger than 300 000 football fields damn so i like how they just sound good the way they describe it though just using football fields as an analogy that really makes it hit home for us dumb americans okay now i get it yeah i'm starting that's big i'm starting to think we're kind of fucked we might be kind of fun when we went when we went 100 went 100 degrees in New York City on Saturday and Sunday, and then Brooklyn was literally flooded on Monday.
And I was driving home on Sunday night, and the skies were, like, bright and lightning. It wasn't, like, one flash of lightning.
It was, like, so much lightning that it was just bright out. I just love it.
Now, what does this mean for bare weather? This could really affect bear weather. I'm a hot seat for sure.

It's true.

30 years from now, wearing no sleeves at a Chicago Bears game

isn't going to be that big of an accomplishment.

Hold on.

But 30 years from now, we'll probably have a 26-week NFL schedule.

So we'll play all the way into February.

That's true.

So we'll be good.

So in a foot of snow.

Yeah, right.

Okay, just keep pushing it back.

I like that.

My cool throne is everyone on Long Island's face because it's going to get rocked off on Saturday. If you're in Long Island or onside, inside Long Island, whatever we're calling it now, Pup Punk is playing a show.
In Long Island. Pup Punk is playing a show at Mulcahy's on Saturday night.
Right by the beach. The 27th.
I don't know if it's by the beach. I think it's like underneath a subway station.
Yeah, you thought it was by the beach. I don't know.

I don't know anything about Long Island, but I do know it's at Mulcahy's, and tickets are very affordable, and there's still some available.

And we've got a new song coming out tomorrow.

Nice.

So stay tuned for that.

Today.

Yes, it's the song of the summer, and you will love it.

That's a promise from me to you, so I will see you.

Guarantee?

In Long Island on Sunday.

Guarantee.

Guarantee.

That's a PFT guarantee.

On Saturday. On Saturday.
What did I say? Sunday? You nailed it. Yeah.
See you on Saturday. you guarantee in long island on sunday guarantee that's a pft saturday on saturday what i say see on saturday and on sunday because we'll probably play past midnight oh badass checkmate uh my other cool throne is unpopular opinions they are on my cool throne because people are getting really into expressing unpopular opinions on twitter uh but the thing is they they're not very unpopular.
So I did a little unpopular opinion search on Twitter. And here's some of the unpopular opinions that people say.
Okay, ready for this? Unpopular opinion. All politicians are corrupt and meant to divide us.
That's very popular. That's an unpopular opinion.
Unpopular opinion. Pineapple doesn't go on pizza.
I think a lot of people agree with that as well. Unpopular opinion.
You shouldn't date your friend's exes. Pretty popular opinion.
People are really going on a limb here. But if you put unpopular opinion before anything you say, it gets more traction.
That's a little life hack for you. Okay.
I like that. By the way, did you see that Boris Johnson guy? He's basically Rob Ford.
I didn't realize that. Oh, yeah.
No, he is like... He's hilarious.
I don't know his politics, but he's hilarious in terms of like, just will bulldoze over a little kid while they're playing football. The photo ops he gets himself into as a politician are just like out of this world.
I can't believe that his team... He was in one...
Like a crane lifted him up and he was wearing like a Union Jack suspender outfit. I thought it was like a new Ricky Gervais show when I saw some of his gifts.
Right. I couldn't believe it.
He looks like if Ricky Gervais dressed up like Donald Trump and fell into an ocean, they didn't towel him off good enough. Yeah, he's just running around, you know, running over kids, tackling people, falling over.
The Rob Ford legacy is still alive. I would actually I want to take that back he's more like a mix between trump visually and jeff daniels from dumb dumber okay that's kind of the vibe that he puts out yeah and maybe a little touch sprinkle mark davis mark davis as well also his name is boris which is just that's always throws you off as a british guy you're just like this guy's from russia yeah okay uh my hot seat is twitter again because it fucking sucks the update is the worst i don't know why they keep doing it why do they keep doing it just to fuck with you and you know what the worst part is you talk about jack through the people under the bus did you see that big article that was like here are the three women that are behind the big twitter update and they just got roasted on You can't do that.
You can't give us names of the people who made the Twitter update. Here are the three badass women that did the Twitter update.
Do they have one person in any of these companies? I will work for any of these companies for $5 million a year. This is an open offer to just be the regular dude who you show it right before you launch it.

And I can say that's stupid.

Well, the thing is companies like this, they have so many employees that they have to come up with projects for them to do.

Right.

If they don't have a project, they're just maintaining the existing website.

And then it's like you have to fire everybody because they're not doing anything new.

Right.

Just keep it running.

Yeah.

Just keep it.

Just keep it running.

Just like change the font every now and again.

How about that?

That's fine.

Yeah.

Give us different fonts.

Go back to stars instead of hearts.

Every now and then.

Allow porn.

Have a section of Twitter just for porn. That works too.
My cool throne is police officers, NYPD police officers, because people are throwing water on them. To cool them off.
To cool them off. In the summertime.
It's so hot. Although I think they're doing it maliciously.
Yes. Like marathon runner type thing? I i don't know they're just throwing water on them it's it's malicious it's like they shouldn't be doing it but the uh effect is that they're getting cooled off so they're literally on the cool throne i like that yeah what about what's the deal with the fire hydrants what's the law in new york can you just open up a fire hydrant at any time i drove by four dudes who are sitting in lawn chairs with an open fire hydrant it looked like the most fun thing ever yeah it's like the moose that they weren't doing anything in canada they're just sitting there by the water i like i want to know what the rules for that are like is that something that just very little can do yeah or is that do you have to have like somebody from the public works department a yellow vest combine do it i think it's pretty illegal but also very cool also very cool it's cooler than it is illegal yes so go ahead all right we ready to do it let's do it uh we have our mount rushmore of the most average things in the world this is gonna be good is it i no i don't know it'll be all right who is going first i think i go first this time right me first then hank hank is a little nervous he said i don't know.
It'll be all right. Who is going first? I think I go first this time, right? Me first.
Then Hank. Hank is a little nervous.
He said, I don't really understand it. I'm never nervous because at the end of the day, it's not about competition.
It's just about fun. That's true.
We're here to lift each other up. King support King.
Are you ready? Let's do it. My first average thing.
I'm going to go with Kirk Cousins.

Kirk Cousins, probably the most average quarterback that these two eyes have ever seen.

He will beat every team that is less than 8-8, and he will lose to every team that is better than 8-8.

He's one of those quarterbacks where if you see he's going to be on primetime, you're like,

okay, I'm decently excited to watch this game, but you never expect him to do anything great. And guess what? He never does.
Can I debate it? Okay. I think his contract makes him not average anymore.
He's got so much fucking money. I think it makes him more average.
No, I think that makes him not average. Because it highlights just how average he is.
You think that Kirk Cousins is more average than Andy Dalton? Yes. Andy Dalton is exceedingly average.
I think that Andy Dalton was at Kirk Cousins' level like two, three years ago, but some of that average shine has been rubbed off on him a little bit. What do you mean? He's lost a little bit of the luster of being average.
I would say Andy Dalton might be more average than Kirk Cousins. I think Kirk Cousins' contract makes it, and the whole betting on himself and then having it work.

An average guy doesn't do that.

No, I think he's very, very average.

And also, he's still got the haircut.

The doofus haircut makes him more average.

Andy Dalton, when he got rid of the doofus haircut and got the glow-up, became less average.

That's an average guy move to try to glow up

and not really successfully do it because you're a ginger.

No.

All right, Hank, go ahead. Yeah.
Pudding. Pudding.
Okay. Okay.
I'm here for that. Any kind of pudding? Tafioca.
Vanilla pudding. Okay.
Okay. Good job.
Good job. Nice job, Hank.
All right. My first one, my first pick will be, I'm going to go with a ham sandwich.
Ham sandwich. Okay.
I feel like you don't really get a ham sandwich. If you get like an Italian, you got to spice it up with the pepperoni and all the other stuff.
Turkey usually is the go-to. Ham sandwich is like, I don't know.
You just have it. It's okay.
It's not great. No one gets excited for it.
You can kind of dress up ham a little bit sometimes when there's a honey glaze a baked ham that's different but a ham sandwich ham i had turkey sandwich on my list i would say turkey is more average than ham no people like people like you can get a turkey sandwich that's really good but you don't eat the turkey and you're like oh this is great turkey but you can have great totally average uh you got dude turkey is the fucking central point to a whole holiday.

Okay, my second pick.

It is.

Oh, I love a deep fried turkey.

All right.

My second pick is going to be owning a Toyota Camry.

Fuck.

Are you serious?

You guys had that too?

No.

I had Toyota Camrys just in general. I had Toyota Corollas.
Corolla's the step down. Yeah, but it's more average.
Camry's the average. No, Avalon is the elite.
That's the fucking, you know, the nicest car you can own in the world. Corolla's your starter car.
Camry is the, like, I'm making $65 a year. Maybe I got one kid or a dog.
I'm feeling okay. I got my Camry camera but you get that feeling sometimes when you get in the back of a of a camry that you can stretch your legs out in a corolla cam it's always like a little little cramp i agree cameras no the fact that it was two verse one yeah who here used to sell used cars i if i if i saw literally baller kink and i both had camry that's that's so i see a fucking ball onto my lot.
I'm putting you on a Camry. You're still mad about the Kirk Cousins thing.
Immediately. Camry is the right choice.
I'm talking about Corolla specifically. Wednesdays.
Oh, good pick, Hank. The most average day.
It really is. Mondays suck.
Two-man Tuesdays. And then Thursday and Friday are basically the weekend.
Wednesdays are just like, can't be too good. Can't be too bad.
Just got to get through it. Yep.
You can't go out on a Wednesday. No one's the rest of your week if you try.
You feel okay. But then you're like, eh.
You're not excited for the weekend yet because you still have two more days. And then Thursday, you're like, all right.
It's not even football. Yeah.
Wednesday is like waiver wire day. That's it.
That's all Wednesday is good for. Good pick, Hank.
Thank you. Good pick, Hank.
I like that. So I guess I can't do Toyota Corolla now.
I'm going to go. It's a starter vehicle.
I'm going to go with U2. The band, U2.
Okay. It's perfectly average.
They got some songs that I'll listen to that I won't change the channel on. Okay.
That I won't object to. And then they've got a lot of songs.
And I'm like, what the hell is this? How many more songs can I hear Bono scream about like a polar bear drowning?

Okay.

So yeah, U2 is like the perfect band.

Plus they're the ultimate.

The perfect band.

The ultimate dad band.

Are they the perfect band or the perfectly average band?

They're the perfectly average band.

They've had a lot of hits though, right?

They've got, yeah, they've got a lot of hits.

They've got a lot of clunkers and even some of their hits aren't that good.

I feel like Apple wouldn't like put music on your phone if you were average band.

Oh, yes, they would.

You're saying the things that I'm thinking, Hank.

I'm not going to say them.

Hank, yes, they would because they know that they're not going to offend anybody by preloading.

But they offended everyone.

Yeah, everyone was pissed.

Yeah, because you're like, I didn't ask for this.

All right, what's your next pick?

All right, my next one, I'm going to go with the Winter Olympics.

Okay.

The Winter Olympics are all right.

You've got a couple decent events, I guess. Or not basketball.
You've got hockey. Okay.
That's kind of nice. Okay.
The Winter Olympics are all right. You've got a couple decent events, I guess.
Or not basketball. You've got hockey.
That's kind of nice. Okay.
Ski jump can be cool to watch for a night. The problem...
Curling's awesome. Actually, I don't...
No, go ahead, Hank. You've got to finish your statement.
What are you going to say? When there's only two Olympics... Correct.
It's tough to be average when there's only two. There's either a good or a bad one.
No, just specifically like the Olympics, the Winter Olympics in general, it's like I kind of like them. Exactly.
Every four years? Exactly. It's nice.
It's a special treat. Do you like the Summer Olympics or the Winter Olympics more? Summer, obviously.
If it was every year, I would say, yeah, that's pretty average. So Summer Olympics are great.
Summer Olympics are good. Winter Olympics are average.
Now when Bob Costas shows up with a pink eye that's looking like he's been going... Dude, what about figure skating? You forgot about figure skating.
It looks like he's been going Christian Yelich on somebody's ass. Then I'm fine with that.
But no, Winter Olympics are just... They're a very average...
It's an average event. But it's only every four years.
Yeah. It averages every four years.
You're correct. All right, Hank'm i'm running out of them but uh i have a shitload i'll go with long sleeve shirts okay okay something you only want to put on like that's not bad it's not it's not something you go out of your way to put on but it's like all right i i don't want to be too hot i don't want to be too cold but it's not like it's not a deciding factor no specific long-sleeve shirt weather.
The only thing I threw on mine is hoodless sweatshirt. You think that long-sleeve, embrace the bait, more average.
Hoodless sweatshirt, long-sleeve shirt? Hoodless sweatshirt. Hoodless sweatshirts are harder to come by.
Hoodless sweatshirts, it feels like there should be a hood there. It's true.
I love hoodless sweatshirts. It's a tweener outfit.
All right. My next pick is going to be, and this I thought about, okay, who is the most average college football team of all time? And when I looked it up, I had one team that popped in my head, and I looked up at the numbers, and it confirmed it to the max.
North Carolina State football.

Okay.

I looked it up.

They are 5'10 overall for their entire history.

510 winning percentage.

They have 23 of the last 40 years they've gone to a bowl game.

All the bowl games are like the exact same, you know, not good, not great.

Like the Gator Bowl, the Sun Bowl, the Independence Bowl, the independence bowl the minor key car bowl like okay you had a good year they had one year where they won 11 games in the last 40 years they haven't won more than 10 otherwise every year is basically seven eight nine and then take out obviously phil rivers is the exception of the rule but there are two other quarterbacks in the the NFL right now, Jacoby Brissett and Mike Glennon.

Russell Wilson.

He's a Wisconsin guy.

Russell Wilson.

And I feel like every four or five years, NC State beats Clemson or Florida State on

a Thursday night.

So I was going to use the quarterback as a position to dispute the averageness of NC

State because of Russell Wilson.

Well, he's a Wisconsin guy.

Because of Phillip Rivers, Hall of Famer.

But he was great at Wisconsin.

So that was where he was.

Phillip Rivers, Hall of Famer.

Yeah, no, no.

I said he's the Wisconsin guy. Because of Phillip Rivers, Hall of Famer.
He was great at Wisconsin. Phillip Rivers, Hall of Famer.
Yeah, no, no, I said he's the exception there. And because of Chuck Amato looking like if Guy Fieri was a pit crew boss in NASCAR.
Tom O'Brien, such an average coach. I love Chuck Amato with the glasses.
My next pick is going to be... Fuck, this is hard.
All right, I'm going to go with, in the music the music genre john cougar mellencamp the most average guy you could come come across he's not as cool as bob seeger he has nowhere near as many hits as tom petty his number one song is jack and diane great doing the best they can they're literally average people he wrote a song about average people and he's from indiana And you're like, oh, he must be the most famous person, famous musician from Indiana. Michael Jackson is the most famous Indiana musician.
So John Cougar Mellencamp. But he wrote great songs about average people.
So, for example, he wrote... You're still hung up on Kirk Cousins? No, no, we're debating.
We're debating here. He wrote Pink Houses, another song about average people.
He's average. Doing great stuff.
Yeah, he's average as could be. Hurt's so good.
Small town. Everything is just average.
He wrote a banger about S&M. He's as average as possible.
John Cougar Mellencamp. About getting choked out.
He really is that guy you think like, oh, is he Tom Pate? No, he's not Tom Pate. Well, his middle name's also Cougar.
Yeah, well, he dropped it, though. I think he's just John Mellencamp now.
He's always the Coug to me.

I think he wrote great songs about average people like Bruce Springsteen.

What do you mean?

That's what Bruce did.

That's what the boss did.

Yeah, Bruce has hits.

Great songs about average people.

All right, Hank, your last pick?

I don't know.

Okay.

I'll go with that.

I have one if you want one.

No, I don't know.

Please.

I wrote this down. Law and Order SVU.
That's good. All right.
Great. That's a good pick.
It's not bad. It's a show you don't turn off, but you kind of also don't really want to watch.
You don't go out of your way to watch it, but when it's on, sometimes you watch. Good pick.
And you'll go through the commercials. It does suck you in sometimes, though.
But sometimes you just flick right out. Yeah.
All right. For my last one, this is going to be tough.

Good job, Hank.

You didn't have any more than that? No. Knees and spring, but I don't even know if that counts.
Knees. Just the joint? Yeah.
Okay. Knees.
Good. My last one, I'm going to go with...
Hmm. This is tricky.
I'm going to go with University of Pittsburgh football. Okay.
Strike that. Whoa.
ACC Coastal football. So you're just taking NC State as a conference.
Well, I had both of these on my list. Okay.
Actually, I think that Pittsburgh is more average than NC State. Dan Marino.
They had Dan Marino. I think think they won a national title or they went to a national title game they've had some good players national title game over the years tough uh acc coastal football is gonna be my last one i think it's a very very average division um anyone can win on any given year and then get their asses kicked in the conference championship game wait so isn't uh who's in the ACC Coastal i'm bringing it up right now because i think that's uconn uh miami and clemson oh no clemson miami is definitely not average and virginia tech is also pretty pretty good even when virginia tech is good they're not that good though but miami but then you're dealing with so you're dealing with uh your Georgia techs, your Dukes, your UVA's, your pits, your NC, no, not,

Oh yeah.

No,

no, not that good though but Miami but then you're dealing with so you're dealing with uh your Georgia Tech's your Dukes your UVA's your pits your NC State no not oh yeah NC State's the other one North Carolina okay so that's a but what about Miami that's a murderer's row of nobody giving a shit about you Miami Maya is the you back do you know uh Georgia Tech's not running this the uh triple option this year so fucked up so fucked up. All right, what else we got? Honorable mentions.
Hank, you got none? Wheel of Fortune, Knees, and Spring. Wheel of Fortune's good.
I had Vanilla Ice Cream. Oh, and Jeff Green, but that was from Coley.
I had Evan Turner. Evan Turner, his average points is 9.9 in his career.
He's never averaged more than 14, and he's never averaged less than 7. That's pretty solid.
He's pretty damn average. I had 24-hour fitness.
Okay. Very average, Jim.
Yes. Vodka.
Okay. Mids.
What about owning a Labrador Retriever? Yeah, but they're great dogs. They are great dogs, but it's very average.
Very good dogs. What about Snickers? I feel like Snickers is the most average candy bar because it has peanuts, but it's not the best peanuts with Reese's.
And it has caramel, but it's not the best caramel with Twix and Milky Way. So it doesn't do anything the best, but it has it all.
I had Subway, Subway sandwiches. Yeah, that's good.
Very average. You'll eat it if you're hungry.
I like that. But you would probably just walk past it if there was some other place on the block.

Bubba sent me Chipotle.

Chipotle?

I was going to say my penis size, but it's not.

It's below.

I'm going to go mids.

Okay.

What about mac and cheese?

Above ground pools.

Mac and cheese?

I disagree.

You don't think so?

I love mac and cheese.

Orange Starbursts. The best.
you like orange the best yes they're okay yeah yeah they're okay it's yellow and pink the best and then orange yeah and then red's terrible no red's pretty good all right uh indianapolis in the city you are i i kind of like indianapolis oh i it, but it's average because it's not only where all of the test ground for the chain restaurants, but it also has two of the four major sports. Not all four.
Yeah. It's just average.
I've got Bleacher Report website. Yes.
Jim Furyk. Just Jim Furyk in general.
Yep. That's good.
And what was my last one? Oh, yeah, the app Pandora. Also good.
Yeah, pretty average. Did I say brand muffins? 5'9".
Yeah, 5'9". Yeah, good point.
Perfectly average. That is perfectly average.
Perfectly average height. And, yeah, I think that's it.
All right, that was an okay Mount Rushmore. Very okay.
Very okay. I think there's some good answers.
Moderately contentious. But there are also some bad answers.
You guys really swarmed on me on that one. But you know what? That's fine.
That's the spirit of Mount Rushmore season. I didn't say anything about Kirk Cousins.
We like to debate things on this show. And you know what? We'll let the audience decide.
It's tough when two of the three of us say Toyota Camry and then you insist that it's the Corolla. I think the Corolla is more average than the Camry.
The Corolla is the starter vehicle. You can be a baller in a Camry.
The Corolla is the starter vehicle. Put some Ds on that.
The Avalon is the elite luxury. It's literally three classes.
I would say that... The middle is right at Camry.
They make it for that reason. A Hyundai would be the starter vehicle.
Then you upgrade to a Corolla. I'm happy that I picked that one I did because, man, everyone had the Toyotas on there.
All right, let's get to our interview with Adnan Virk. When did we tape this? About a week and a half ago? I said some things about Joe Maddon.
The Cubs have been okay since, so maybe I'll take some of those. We're going to get right back to the show.
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We're going to get right back to the show.

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US USA! All right, back to part of my take. Okay, here he is, Adnan Virk.
Okay, we now welcome on a very special guest, someone we've actually done work with in the past. We were on a radio show with you once.
No, twice. Twice.
Right out of the gate, big cat. Come on.
You know the voice. We called Jason Kidd on your show.
Good memory for PFT. Here's the memory.
So first off, I met you guys in Miami. I was there with Rasilla for the All-Star game.
It was the first time we met. We did the show.
And then PFT's right. When you guys were on at ESPN, you called Jason Kidd on the show.
And Jason Kidd was great. He was.
He was like, no problem. He agreed to come on Barstool Hand Talk.
So when the show gets green lit again, he'll be our second guest. So that's the voice, Adnan Virk.
You came with a posse. I didn't know that.
Things have changed, so you're at DAZN now. You have two podcasts, GM Shuffle and Cinephile, and then you host shows on DAZN, and you have a posse.
When did that happen? I know. It's weird, fellas.
You guys know me. I'm just a little Canadian.
And I love the fact, by the way, on PFT's laptop, he has a sorry right there for me. So he literally put that up there for me.
But I just think that if you don't have a posse, like, who are you? Like, in this day and age, honestly, like, just feel like you're... I don't even really know these guys.
I saw him on the street, gave him 10 bucks each day. He'd come in here.
You guys barstool fans? Like, yeah, great. That's actually not a bad business model.
It's just, like, Tinder, except just for dudes to roll with you, please. Right.
What's this guy do? I don't know. Yeah, he just stands next to me.
He makes me look very important. I'm glad you brought up DAZN right off the bat because we've struggled with the pronunciation.
It's DAZN. D-A-Z-N.
I've got it now. DAZN.
Yeah, it is DAZN. And I don't blame you, PFT.
You're right. You see it and you go, is it D-A-Z-N? Is it Dazn? I'm not really sure.
But it is DAZN, which I think is different. It's a cool name.
It's four letters. It's four letters.
I wouldn't say I'm a fan of it. I mean, it's okay.
But what about the first time someone said barstool? Somebody was in a meeting and goes, what do you mean, like cheers, like barstools? Yeah. How does that relate to sports? And then I'll say, dude, it's great.
Barstool, yeah. Yeah, I guess it's just more the confusion.
If you make something confusing for me, I'm kind of out already. Well, here's what happened.
So ESPN, I see four letters, one vowel, N's and an N. Right.
But you say all the letters. And then I see DAZN, four letters, one vowel, N's and an N.
So I'm like, wait, it's not DAZN? I'm so dumb that when it's... It's not dumb.
My brain has been conditioned to say sports networks by letter. So you actually...
You got started working at TSN. That's right.
Right? Yeah, yeah. And fun fact, people forget.
I remember this. The T in TSN stands for the.
That's perfect. It's the sports network.
That's very literal. Right.
I like that. It's so Canadian.
All right. So how is the zone going? So you have the baseball whip around, right? That's right.
So change up, which... And I want to talk about your Cubs in a minute here.
I really want to get your thoughts on Joe Maddon, because this is keeping me up at night. Well, this is the thing.
So let me just pipe up the show first. So it's on from 7 p.m.
to 1 a.m., live look around all the games as they happen, and me and Scott Rogowski, who is a legitimate comedian, are on from 7 to 10, and Lauren Gardner and Tony Luffner at 10 p.m. to 1 a.m.
So whip around style, all the games as they happen, which is great. Well, what's better than one piece of cheesecake? You've got 10 pieces of cheesecake, all the games as they happen, all the best moments, Trout, Machado, et cetera.
Let's talk about your Cubs. Yeah.
So everyone keeps saying, all right, Joe Maddon on the hot seat, and I get the fact that Cubs have underachieved, and I understand the fact that division is poor. It's obviously a mediocre division.
But whenever you fire a guy, you have to be able to say, hey, we've got the next man up. Who's the one lurking in the wings? I think people think it's David Ross.

Ryan Sandberg.

No, I see.

Ryan Sandberg.

It's not Ryan.

We already passed on Ryan.

Remember, everyone's like,

Ryan was going to be the next big one.

He was going to be the guy.

He was groomed to be the guy, and then he passed.

It was a big deal.

Not working out.

No, I actually think people think David Ross.

I swear to God.

Okay, if it's Rossi, then I'm all in.

I think the way that the manager position in baseball has moved to now,

it's less about the X's and O's,

because they have so many guys upstairs that do that shit for him. Right.
You know, like Aaron Boone, someone basically sets up the whole game for him. He doesn't decide.
He doesn't have to make these big decisions as much as he did maybe in the past. It's a lot more about keeping a clubhouse together and having like, you know, and I think David Ross would be great at that aspect.
I have to know specifically with Booney what to what level it is. If you want me to call him, I'll call him.
But oh, nice flex. But honestly, I can't picture this big cat.
Literally, there's like Brian Cashman, like Booney's wearing an earpiece. He's telling him like, OK, Jonathan Holder.
Yeah, I know. I think it's a plan.
It's already in place. It's like, when he gets to this, do this.
If this happens, do this. It's almost like a choose-your-own-adventure book that you're reading every game.
So it's not like you're not making decisions. It's just a lot of the decisions have kind of been made for you collectively rather than one person.
And back to Joe Maddon, the only reason that he's, like, quote-unquote on the hot seat is because he doesn't have a contract. They knew this was going to happen.
If you don't give him an extension before this season and the Cubs aren't on pace to win 110 games, there will be spots in the summer where people will be like, are they going to fire him? Right. But my question here as a Cubs fan, do you think Joe Maddon is still a good manager? I do.
I think he's a good manager. I do think he – I think there's an element of – it's very complicated, but I think there's an element of 2016 even after winning the world series there were some things that happened in that clubhouse that he never fully repaired right the fact he wasn't going to be happy unless he rolled his chapman's arm fell off right and just not using guys in the right spot and i think there is the element of you know a lot of guys will say to the media that they don't care about how they get shifted up and down the lineup right but it matters to players like guys don't like batting in different spots day there's an ego issue i don't want to hit six you're right exactly or it's even that it's just like i you know you get comfortable in a spot so i think a little bit of that a little bit of switching out guys and and and playing musical chairs at points he i think joe madden is a great manager i think he was perfect for a young Once you get to a veteran team, I think it gets a little bit different.
I also think that there's an element of, like, I always look at it, if you fire Joe Maddon or if Joe Maddon doesn't resign next year, he's going to get picked up somewhere else. Correct.
The question isn't, is he a good manager? Because he is a good manager. It's, is he a good manager for this team right now? And he's a guy, like, if you look in football, like Marty Schottenheimer used to be where it's like, yes, he's an awesome coach but if you keep him around the same team for

too long, it just becomes like Charlie Brown's

teacher going, wah, wah, wah. And you kind of tune

him out after a while. It's Phil Jackson.

Was it the rule of seven? Was it seven

years that guys tune him out and you

want to basically change over the entire team?

Otherwise, people will just not listen. I know some

managers too who don't like Joe Madden who think that he makes

it about himself. That's what I thought you might do.
But sometimes it's a bad thing. Sometimes it's a good thing.
He takes the pressure off the glass because he's funny and he drinks wine and he tells stories for an hour. He brings a magician in.
I love that stuff. Who wants to see a parent? You can say a million things about Joe Maddon if you want to critique him but the one thing he always does and I respect is he never ever ever lets his players get the blame.
He always stands in front of his players, and you will never see him take shots at his players through the media, which a lot of managers do. Right.
He never does that shit. So in that respect, he absolutely is great for them.
He also has a hell of a spin move. Yeah.
Spin move on Joe Les. Joe Les was not able to go.
No, you can't. Joe Les was Jonathan Ogden.
Yeah, so baseball is, you're covering it every night. We've talked about it, and I think everyone talks about it in the media.
Like, where does baseball go with none of these guys being like superstars? And it's such a regional sport. You just only care about your team.
Right. You fix baseball for us.
So I think, I love it. Go ahead.
Commissioner for a day, Virk. You figure it out.
We've got some ideas if you don't have it. Steroids.
Back. Nothing wrong with a juice ball.
Fighting. Fighting is a good thing.
I think this. I do agree that the sports become regionalized, but I feel like I'm still that guy who just loves watching the game.
I get the fact the All-Star game numbers go down every year, but I'm the guy that still loves introduction. I still want to know what all these guys look like with their hats off.
So I guess I'm not one who's personally reflective of the demographic, which is saying that baseball is not a national sport, because to me it is. Because our show, listen, to your point, Dan, if you're a Cubs fan, you watch the game on WGN, and then after the game you flip over to change, and be like, all right, I already got my Cubs, so my regional fix is satiated.
But now, you know what, I do want to watch Kershaw and Chris Paddock and Manny Machado, whomever. So I think that I fight that notion of I just watch my team and that's it.
I do think that happens in this sport more than others. But I do think that, because listen, you could argue that in the NBA, do you really care about the Hawks and the Wizards? No, not really.
I'm a big Wizards fan. You watch for stars.
I think NBA you watch for stars stars. Right.
In NFL, you watch every game because there's only 16 games. There's only 16.
Right. College football, same thing.
There's only so many games. In baseball, I feel like you do watch for stars a little bit, too.
That's my thing. I agree.
So you like your regional team, but then, yeah, I would watch Manny Machado get up. See, PFT is with me.
I would watch Craig Kimbrell get into the game and do his weird little dance that he does before. You're not going to do it for a whole game, but change between just five minutes.
I get that, but it's hard to watch.

It's hard to be like, I can't wait to watch Mike Trout tonight

when he could go and have four at-bats,

and two of them could be a walk and a single.

And it happens an hour apart from each other.

That's the problem with baseball.

It doesn't lend itself to watching stars night in and night out,

where you're like, this guy, like in basketball, if you're watching for LeBron James, you know he's going to play 42 minutes. You know he'll have the ball in his hand.
You know he'll shoot the ball 25 times. When you watch baseball, if you're watching for a star, you might get four or five at-bats.
But here's where I think it helps, specifically change up in the zone, which is fantasy. Fantasy baseball is still huge, just like football.
So if you agree with PFT, you still like to watch the sports

and you're big into fantasy baseball,

then I think it's a huge win. That's for sure.

Here's a reason. If you gamble

and fantasy, then I think, there you go. That's what

is fixed baseball. More gambling, more fantasy.

Are they going to be open to gambling, though? Is Manfred

like, everyone talks about Adam Silver

being, we always joke on this show, Adam

Silver. He's got friends in the desert.
He has

the easiest job in the world because the other three commissioners are so resistant to change Adam Silver can just be like yeah gambling sounds like a good idea and it was like damn Adam Silver what a fucking forward thinker oh yeah he sometimes just changes too much he goes based off whatever like is the most recent reddit thread on r slash NBA and then he's like yeah we're gonna implement that yeah he's. That's his name.
Everything is so progressive. Whatever you want to do.
Saying gambling is good for the sport. Right.
Having that be like a hot take in comparison to the other three commissioners is insane. He's not even saying anything crazy.
He's just saying we're going to grow the pie. So is Rob Manford going to do the same thing? We'll say we're completely in cahoots with Major League Baseball because changeup is done in Secaucus.
So the studio is there is where we are. So MLB has been great.
Rob McClary, Dave Patterson, the whole team. We have Harold Reynolds on.
We have Dan Plesak on. We have Eric Burns on.
That guy's a nut. So I do think that line's been blurred a little bit.
So maybe if Major League Baseball is, you know what? We're not doing an MLB network, but if DAZN wants to do it on Changeup, yeah, okay, sure, we're partners, but it's a separate entity. Go ahead.
You should have Kevin Millar on and have him just do dick talk based on every player that's up. He loves to do it.
Okay, let me tell you about this guy's package right now. This guy's hung like a light switch.
So before I came here, of course, I did let everybody know, hey, I'm going to go see Big Cat PFT. And they're like, oh, great.
Ask him what happened with intentional talk. I've heard the story.
I got it. Chris Rose.
So do you work in, you don't work in the same area. Same building.
So do you hit wiffle balls? I haven't had a chance yet, but I could. I think I had the record.
So you guys have done it? Collectively, we had the record. Collectively.
What was the record? Is it like Vlad Jr., 91? Yeah, I hit five. We had a total of six.
Yeah, it's six. So just say that.
It's like I'm like Hank Aaron and he's my brother. We had a total of six home runs.
Seven, 65, 1. Billy Ripken and Cal Ripken over here.
Is there a spot here? Where we are right now, if I may say it's nice, but it's a little sterile. I was expecting hoops and stuff.
We're going to have a pinball machine. When Russillo comes by, there's a bench press machine.
Speaking specifically for Russillo. What's it like hosting a show with someone who's actually funny now? Is that nice? Good one.
That's going to hurt Russillo's feelings. Listen, Rosillo's a great dude.

He is.

We like him.

He's definitely a friend.

He was such an advocate for you guys.

Seriously.

Before, like, I had met you guys.

He was like, no, you guys are going to love these guys.

Yeah.

Right?

And you know, your image can be for some, like, oh, I'm not sure.

It's controversial.

It's edgy.

What are these guys doing?

Ryan's like, oh, those guys are great.

Right.

So he is as big a fan of yours as you guys are of him.

So let's talk about some ESPN.

Sure.

All right. You got fired.
Are you addicted to leaking stuff do you have a leak problem you have a leak problem you're like you left to like are you going to just tell everyone what are you going to release this podcast before we even release it no i i think in this case that why these guys are here right they're recording it yeah it's going to run on awful announcing tomorrow morning they want to make sure that we follow the right protocol protocol. Like, Burke cannot be trusted on his own.
That's what we have by Army here. So, yeah, you're addicted to leaking.
I feel like that type of thing happens a lot, though, like in sports media. These websites, they get their scoops from somewhere, right? Right.
Explain it. Explain the whole situation.
Yeah, why was it different when you did that? I know you've done it, but give it to us for real. Don't give us the Jim Miller and Richard Deish, like, let's clean it up.
Those guys had your back, man. That was crazy.
That's what I honestly have to tell you guys. Whenever this thing happens, and I pray...
Have either of you ever been fired before? Oh, yeah. One time from ESPN.
Yeah, that's true. That's right.
We did have a good point. Relatable.
Right. I had a slightly longer stick than you guys.
You guys can't relate to this. But when you're watching everything unfolding, it's like watching your own funeral.
You're listening to podcasts people are talking about adnan was regarded as a good guy he was well i'm still here i'm making eggs right now for my kids i'm still here i got plenty of hot takes i'm ready to go yeah and and then you hear some people being of course if you go online you go okay at best you're gonna go if it's 50 50 you feel pretty good but i was looking i'm on my side. People are going to be like, hey, this guy's a good guy.

This shouldn't have happened.

And as you mentioned, Jim Miller and Dykes, those guys are unbelievable.

I was like, take it easy, guys.

I know he shouldn't have been fired, but he probably did leak something.

He's not deep throat here.

He's not the Pentagon Papers.

All right, so walk us through it.

So tell us the whole story.

So people who don't know, what exactly happened?

You've been at ESPN forever. Right.
The story comes out that it was, what was it, a Baseball Tonight news that you had maybe talked to someone on background? That's the part that sucks, that you got fired for fucking leaking baseball news. No one cares.
It was like the start time of Baseball Tonight, right? The story of the worst news ever. I wouldn't have even known that news.
Well, that's like PFT said. It wasn't exactly the Pentagon paper.
If you're going to go with a bag, you should probably go up with something a little more incendiary, which made the decision a little more crazy. But honestly, like you guys said, I've been there for nine years.
I thought I'd put up a good resume. I'd done a lot of work on a lot of different shows and had a good time.
And sometimes, listen, you develop relationships with guys in the media, and it isn't thought to be anything nefarious or anything sinister. But in this case, USPM was really upset about it, and they just said we're going to part ways.
It's kind of like a marriage in many ways, a relationship. You're with somebody.
Something happens. You go, hang on a second.
Is this that big a deal? And they go, yeah, it is. And you go, I don't understand.
I'm sorry. No, you're out.
That was that? Can I get the flat screen TV? No. Can I get a couch? No, we're done.
The marriage is over. See you later.
And you go, okay. Was it about the leak itself? Because I feel like leaks happen in this business all the time.
There are like numerous websites out there that have sources inside, whether it's FS1, whether it's ESPN, wherever. Was it the leak? Or did you like right after you got caught, were you like, no, it wasn't me? And they're like, let's see your phone.
You're your phone and you're like oh yeah it kind of was me. Yeah I mean I think it was the whole situation probably just became unfortunate and they just didn't like I don't know I guess the way that the sequence of events unfolded but honestly I'm lucky the way things worked out because as you guys know this industry is very tricky man like something happens and all of a sudden you go alright that's it this guy's done he's got a black mark on him he's got a scarlet letter but thankfully that wasn't the case you know what i mean for me i was just really lucky that john skipper gave me this opportunity that jamie horowitz came in and did this so honestly espn's a great a great place to work the last 72 hours were not great you guys know what that's like yeah getting pulled the plug is not fun but um you know it's worked out well so it sounds like it was shocking though when it happened when you're like wait're like, wait, this is really happening? Oh, yeah.
This is really going down? Traumatic. That's crazy.
If you look at, like, Google right now, top five stressors in life, and it's like, you know, death of a loved one. I think number two is, like, you know, a divorce.
But, like, getting fired is right there, moving, relocating. You know, we've got four boys, and, you know, we're living in central Connecticut.
Life is bliss. And all of a sudden, boom, you're out.
At Super Bowl Sunday, you're getting boom. Yeah, which is a top trending topic.
That's not bad, though, because it got buried real quick. Although the Super Bowl sucked.
Everyone's like, let's get back to talking about that. PFT, to your point, I thought it would get buried because it was on before the Super Bowl.
But my understanding is it actually was the opposite because everybody was online on their phones tweeting. Oh, it's a big day.
It's a big internet day. Oh, wait.
What happened to Virk? And the Super Bowl sucked to Dan's point, which I think the Eagles should still be champions. The Super Bowl was so lousy.
Retroactively. The Eagles should still be the champions.
Was there any element of relief? Because for us, when we got fired, I was like, sweet. I don't have to do that show for 16 more weeks.
Sweatpants on Monday. Yeah, exactly.
I mean, there's certain elements that you're like, listen, with ESPN, it's a great place to work, but it does consume your life. Work-life balance is not a strength.
And maybe that's my own fault, just that I was dedicated to the job so much. So, hey, you want me to fill in with Rosilla? No problem.
You want me to do Mike and Mike or go look and we go, sure, in addition to doing baseball tonight, college football, college basketball, etc. So I think when you're there, because it's so competitive, because the people are so talented, you naturally have it overwhelm your life, which is not a good thing.
Now that I'm at DAZN, I'm living in Hohokas, New Jersey, 15 miles from Manhattan. I feel like there's a lot more balance in my life, which was not ESPN's fault.
I think it's my fault. I just kind of let the job overwhelm me.
Yeah, yeah. And it doesn't reward you in the end.
If they want to get rid of you, I'm like, all right. Right.
This guy didn't call it sick for nine years. Good luck to you.
Right's that's sorry you should take your sick days that's actually the biggest thing and your vacations Hank is living proof of that do not pass on those because they could fire you at any moment right no one's gonna go hey he he did cut show this paternity time by the way did you take your full paternity no I'm not really he took a afternoon yeah I'm telling you right now big cat take your time what are you how long we took a Sunday off what's the paternity time you got here at barstool? I don't think there is a... I think you could...
I actually... I don't even know.
Like, we could... At Barstool, I think I could probably not show up for two months and send a few emails and people...
If I kept on doing part of my take, people wouldn't say anything. Right.
But then there's a chance that I could show up for not one afternoon and everyone would be like, where the fuck are you? But think about this. You guys worked for ESPN.
literally was on your first program at espn correct and it was a short stint but if you were to compare the environments of barstool and espn yeah that actually is a one of the lessons we learned was don't be in a situation where other people can kind of control your destiny here we control our own destiny and we make our own content and we don't really have to answer to anyone like people always ask what is the beauty of this place like we get to do whatever we want right and talk to whoever we want go anywhere we want and i don't think there's many places in the media in 2019 where the creators have that freedom all kidding aside if i see you guys listen you could have a huge hit show on uspn which would be awesome. Fuck no.
Or do this where literally, you do whatever you like. We're giving you zero restrictions.
If you ask an actor, if you ask a singer, musician, whomever, you have zero restrictions, money's decent, everything's good. Or you're in a corporate machine, you're big to do billboards, but you better follow the company line.
Oh, equal amounts of money, no chance at all. I would go anywhere near ESPN for that.
Right now, the job that we have, we set our own schedule. The most control that anybody has over our schedule is when we all agree, okay, we're meeting at this time to talk about this weird, shitty idea that we've got that we're going to somehow make work despite itself.
That's the most rigid that we get in our day. We don't have production meetings that are set.
We don't have bosses that we really report to. With the exception of if we fuck up at some point, somebody asks us, hey, why'd you fuck up? And then we tell them.
But the sellout money, if you were like, hey, dude, it was $10 million. Yeah, PFT is the same amount.
So let's go the other way. So less money to work here rather than the big corporation.
If you're talking sellout money, I'd take sellout money. I'll be open about that.
Rick Riley money. That's where I draw the line.
You start throwing millies around and it's like, dude, you don't have to work for the rest of your life. I double your salary to major corporations, but they will tell you exactly what to do.
You guys can dress a different way. I want suits and ties.
Yeah, I don't know about the suit and tie thing. I did that for three weeks.
Worst three weeks of my life. That was right before the Super Bowl.
That's why I didn't pay that much attention to you getting fired because I was too concerned with wearing a fucking necktie. I did get a shout out on your podcast, so I do appreciate that.
What was that? After I was fired, you guys said friend of the show. Yeah, we do consider you a friend of the show.
I appreciate that. Even though you leak everything.
Have you been tested yet at the Zone? Have they been like, I didn't get out of the room. Thankfully, they have not.
They're putting a strong anti-drug gun. Dude, I would make so many of those jokes if you were here.
I would be troubled a dick about it. But that's part of friendship.
You can be able to bust a guy's job. You know what? Right now, we're not actually recording this.
We're going to let you go, and we're going to see what you put out, what turns up online tomorrow. And then if there's nothing, then we'll have you back, and we'll do the show for real.
It's like an addiction. Yeah.
He can't help himself. The Uber driver told me he'd be here at 11.
Really? Did I tell anybody that? Or is that confidential between us? After you leave ESPN, I imagine it takes some time to get your thoughts together, figure out what you want to do. I read that you pulled an ultimate fire guy move and you grew a beard.
Oh, that is nice. That's a great move.
I wish I could do that. That's one drawback to not having good facial hair.
I'll see if I can find the picture. But I was inspired by lettering because I said, you know what? After 30 plus years of having to shave every day, his first thought was, I'm not shaving.
That's all I care about. So I went a good three weeks without shaving.
And it was embarrassing because it was way too many white hairs. So I had this crux here.
Do I dye it like Keith Hernandez? Do it. Just for men.
I dye my hair. Okay.
There's nothing wrong with that, right? Otherwise, I look like I was 57 years old. As long as you as you admit it as long as you say that you dye your hair we don't have to tell somebody preemptively oh by the way hey guys don't worry I just dyed my beard no I think you have to say that you just start the conversation by saying hey guys I've done it yeah no you have to be like hey just so you know I'm dyeing my hair I tell people like hey preemptively before they make a judgment about you they go I dyed my hair oh yeah do you want to be a Coach K or like one of these guys who's weirdly got jet black hair late in life? It's like, just be open about it.
But growing a beard, to me, it was like liberating. And then I had to go for interviews and stuff.
And I was like, do I shave the beard? Do I keep the beard? It's kind of like a Power Journal move having a nice beard like Bob Lee. Bob Lee.
In his career, the general had the beard. And there was a real statement.
When I started at ESPN in 2010, it was like, I don't think it was quite like the Yankees, no facial hair rule, but you had to be somebody special to do it. Now everybody has a beard.
If you don't have a beard, then people think, what's wrong with you? Did you not get the memo? Do you think... Jesse Palmer, by the way, started the trend.
He was the first guy at ESPN, went, cool beard. You know what? Jesse now engaged.
He's so damn good looking that if he... No matter what he does, you're like, okay, yeah, we'll have that on the air.
No problem. Best looking Canadian.
you think uh espn is like trying to be more friendly to their talent in that respect that like i'm always fascinated with how the media works and how espn because let's be honest when they when they hired us to do barcel vantalk they wanted like the coolness of what we bring right and kind of a relatability that they might not have anymore do you think that they they're going to switch back? Because there's been a weird trend where I think ESPN got lost a little bit. And you felt like you didn't, you know, the big sets and all this technology.
It's like what we care about is connecting with human beings. Right.
I do remember an anchor. I can't remember what it was offhand.
But he said something about when they unveiled that set. $100 million set.
gorgeous set, and the anchors are this big. And he goes, yeah, that's ESPN.
He goes, nothing's bigger than the brand. Giant sports are giant ESPN, and the anchors are this big.
So that was intentional, obviously, is to just be like, hey, we can just change out people left and right, and the brand keeps going on, which I guess is smart. Yeah, I was about to say, in that respect, you don't want to put too much power in the form of labor.
Nothing's bigger than the brand, which I think is accurate. I don't think anyone gives a damn that I'm not there.
ESPN's awesome. Yeah, and it's the history of ESPN.
I think the talent did get bigger than the brand at points with Dan Patrick and Kilborn and Olbermann, and they were able to squash that. But it's always interesting to me because I feel like ESPN, for the longest time it was just they are the worldwide leader they dominate everything and now in the last few years it's been like well maybe not yeah and i think listen you guys have proven that other other shows have proven that that listen personality does count there's going to be people who say well nothing's more important than the content of course i mean you're not going to watch a lousy movie if the story is bad, even if it has actors you like, directors, et cetera.
But if you have personalities that like it, would they not enhance the story? Right. Like in late night shows, right? That's a perfect example.
You say, I don't really care about the late night. I just want to watch Fallon or Colbert, et cetera.
It used to be the Tonight Show in capital letters, right, when Conan was doing it and the fact that Jay wanted to take it back and him and Letterman fighting over it. Now it's like, no, no, I watch Colbert.
I watch Fallon. I watch whomever it is, right? So similar to your point, I think, Big Cat, you're right, that ESPN's always going to have a leg up.
They've been around for 40 years. A 40-year head start, dude.
You've done some great things over the ways. There are obviously a lot of smart people there, a strong infrastructure, et cetera.
But if you have more personality-enhanced mediums, I think you have a chance, which we do with DAZN, certainly with ChangeUp, with our boxing coverage, our enhancing personalities, what you guys do as well. Yeah, DAZN, I've noticed that they've done a very good job recently of sponsoring fights that have a lot of blood and crazy knockouts.
They're big. They get the tweets up on Twitter within seconds of a knockout.
So it's started to work its way into the subconscious already. Okay, DAZN is out here, and they're going to be a player.
I heard that they are thinking about doing NFL rights stuff too, which would be like going after DirecTV a little bit. Now that would be a game changer.
Well, listen, and to go back to, again, with ESPN, look at how football changed that place in the 80s, right? We all grew up with Countdown and et cetera. I remember talking to Chris Berman.
You know, it's so cool. It's funny.
You think about ESPN. I can't believe like I literally met these people, that I was friendly with these people.
I rode in a car with Chris Berman to the World Series in 2013 and I'm like just geeking out the whole time like boomer tell me stories and you know Chris Berman when he talks sometimes like he removes like words meaning he says like he'll just go people look at me football baseball and what he's saying is people look at me and think I'm just a football guy but I love baseball yeah and he's telling me the San Francisco Giants are my favorite team. Like I'm a diehard baseball fan.
I'm like, really? He's like, yeah, baseball is the reason I got this business. I'm like, this is Chris Bervin.
This is like Mr. Football primetime.
But he said, listen, at that nexus of time, he realized football was skyrocketing and just jump on the wagon and go. And that changed USPN.
Fox Sports was fledgling. 1994, they got football.
Boom. So there's no question.
Look, I love baseball as much as anybody. It favorite sport.
It always will be. But I love the NFL.
And if you get the NFL, that changes things. So if DeZone gets football, listen, I'd be ecstatic.
I'd be over the moon. I'd be raising my hand.
Can I be a part of it? We've got NFL in Canada. You guys know I'm Canadian.
I'd love to be a part of that coverage. So, yeah, dude, if we get NFL rights, I'm not privy to the negotiation.
Anything you'd like to tell us about the ongoing negotiations? Yeah, please. We'll cut this part out.
Let us know everything.

Right. I am not privy to those negotiations.

They've wised up. Why not?

I'm not really sure why. I think I'd be able to bring

a lot to the table. They put you in a skiff, one of the

security rooms.

All right. Kind of a random question.

How much did cereal suck for you?

Well, that was hard because

at first nobody knows your name and all

of a sudden they go, wait, you're the guy who murdered your girlfriend. I go, no, no, that that's not me i'm the guy who talks about movies on cinephile this podcast i do so i think it helped in terms of brand awareness yeah but it sucks when you're it sucks you have a unique name and it's like boom the next most famous guy with your name right is the hit podcast murderer well here's the other part of it too so my name correctly pronounced Adnan, which is the serial guy's pronunciation.
But I was literally five years old in kindergarten, and they're doing all the names. And they said my name is Adnan.
I go, all right, I'm just going to go with Adnan. It sounds cleaner and needed.
Don't fight. Yeah, very Canadian of you.
Right. And Canadians go with the short A's.
Mike Medano, not Mike Medano. Right.
So I'm like, all right, short A's. So I just always went with Adnan.
Then serial comes up, and they go, it's Adnan. They go, wait, which one of one of you is the imposter is it the killer or the sportscaster we should have fucking done when he got fired we should have a free adnan hashtag brought it back yeah yeah cross the serial music yeah everyone crossing streams the other problem too is if you say my name is adnan they go adnan which sounds like a robot you're like oh this is my buddy adnan right right yeah i mean i that would suck that's like a nightmare to have some you know if was a big cat, it was a murderer.
Yeah, it's like, well, that sucks. By the way, when Florio fucks up, I get a little of that crossfire sometimes.
It's true. By the way, I do like seeing you on NBC.
The notification comes across your phone. It's like PFT arrested for hit and run.
It's like, no, there was Mike again. After listening to Serial, though, do you guys think he did it? I'm so dumb that my brain has been polluted to not know the answers to any questions in modern media now.
So the point of that podcast is to just inundate you with both sides of everything. The show would not be interesting if it was just very clear that he was railroaded and sent to prison for a crime he didn't commit.
Likewise, the show would not be as interesting if it was very obvious that he did it. So their job is to make it very even-sided.
So I think he probably did it, all things being equal, but I also I think I'm smart enough to know that I have no fucking idea. He either didn't do it or he's an unbelievable sociopath.
Because that part where you trick yourself, you're like, wait, this guy's really likable. Well, of course, if he's a murderer, sociopaths can be likable can be like he's like patrick bateman yeah right you can just trick yourself into thinking about it but uh yeah i guess i guess i'd say yes no final answer no your big no no but i just because we have the same name are you kidding okay what about you he could go to murdering spree i'd still defend him like he's fine hank what's your take i can't remember any of the details of the case yeah i'll say going to say yes.
I'll say this, too. For a lot of hype for that, it was a little long.
After a while, I'm like, all right, eight episodes of this. Didn't they have the Netflix series? I don't need to see the series.
And there's a book as well. I don't need the book as well.
I got it. Either he did or didn't do it.
I don't think he did it. I started to watch the Netflix series, and I was like, I can't do this.
I need Hank's take. I need Hank's take.
I need Hank's take. I need Hank's take.
I need Hank's take. I need Hank's take.
I need Hank's take. I need Hank's take.
I need Hank's take. I need Hank's take.
I need Hank's take. I need Hank's take.
I need Hank's take. You need Hank's take.
You need Hank's take. You need Hank's take.
Just give me Hank's take. Good move by Hank's take.
You don't have to. He's free.
Innocent. He's innocent.

Okay.

Hank is on the Ad Non Innocent project.

We're going to get right back to the show.

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All right.

Back to part of my take. Sopranos, what was the ending? Who died? You know, there's this very artistic theory, which I'm going to go with, which is that because the camera, you know, it's all from Tony's POV, right? Like his point of view is he's watching what's happening.
And then the last shot, he looks up and it goes to black. So I believe that David Chase actually whacked us.
He whacked the audience because we're watching him and we go to black. We can't see any more of the stories.
I think that we get killed. I like that.
I remember watching that real time and thinking my cable went out. I think I'm so mad.
You know, I'm one of the few who did not Big Cat. I was enraged though.
I said, what a cop out. I was screaming at David Chase going, what? Does he die or not? Like, that's brutal.
And my buddy with me was going, no, the cable's like, it's not the cable. It's such an artsy move to not in the movie.
It's unamb it's so for the critics I'm like this is exactly what he would do this is what French films would do in the 60s we're not going to end the movie this is garbage the last season of Sopranos I felt like deja vu though with the last season of Game of Thrones where if you remember in real time I remember having this conversation where everyone was so mad because like we need to to kill everyone. Why the hell are these people still alive? Like, this is, it's so hard to end these shows that you become invested in everyone and you're like, well, everyone's got to die.
What the fuck? So I bought Jesse Paul with The Sopranos because last year he was like, no, I heard it's brutal. I go, what? He goes, the ending's the worst ending ever.
He goes, it's one of the greatest shows of all time. He goes, I heard the ending sucked.
I go, I'll buy it for you. Make your own decision.
So he, whatever, he texted me last week, a couple weeks ago. He was like, oh dude couple weeks ago god dude it's the greatest show ever i'm like i told you that he goes i was just expecting a lot of murder and blood i thought there'd be more of that because of game of thrones i go well that's not the way you should evaluate a show which beloved character gets murdered next right agatha christie this show is awesome right but i watched the last two game of thrones because i'd never seen the show i saw the first episode wasn't for me i'm just not a big dungeons and dragons yeah right i'm not trying to hate whatever i'm in fantasy but i watched the last two with my wife and thankfully she was giving me spoilers because I didn never seen the show.
I saw the first episode. It wasn't for me.
I'm just not a big Dungeons and Dragons guy. I'm not trying to hate.
Whatever. I'm in fantasy.
But I watched the last two with my wife, and thankfully she was giving me spoilers because I didn't know what the hell was going on. And all I cared about was Dinklage.
I go, he's awesome. I love the station.
And he was terrible at the end. Right.
And I go, is Dinklage okay? And he lived. That's all I cared about.
Yeah. Okay.
I lived, and so did Dinklage. Yes.
It was the second act for both of us. I would say, I mean, if we're looking at the best TV show of all time that landed the plane at the end that actually had Breaking Bad.
Breaking Bad would be like the best. I don't think it can get any better than that.
With a bullet. Yeah.
Everything felt clear. His kids still get the money.
Jesse gets away. He's the moral conscious.
Hank does die, which I think at that point he does want to die. He needed to die.
Yeah. He killed the white supremacist.
Yeah. Right.
The Wire too. The Wire just because the system rolls on.
Yeah Yeah, the wire just relentlessly bleak. Right, right.
Like, relentlessly bleak. I can just go to Baltimore and see what's happening.
Right. I don't know if I need to sit through this show and be a lot depressed about my life.
It is. Before we let you go, do you have any questions for us? Yeah, I brought a gift for you guys.
Whoa, okay. I didn't know what to bring.
I said, listen, you had Julian Edelman. You had big stars here.
So I brought straight from Canada. Uh-huh.
Makeful cream. Whoa, those are really good.
Look at these. Originally, I was just going to give them to Big Cat because he had the baby, but I said, that's not fair.
No, we got to share these. Actually, you have to have a kid.
So you know what? We'll share them. So Maple Cream cookies straight from Canada.
He's already tasted nature's cookies as a sex haver. I'm going to have them right now.
I just think you got to bring a gift. You guys have always been good to me.
I'm on a diet, but they look delicious. I'll have one for you.
I started one yesterday no i started no i'm just trying to i'm listen it's gotten it's gotten away from me it's gotten away from that's the thing too like if you in your hypothetical that if we had to work at espn yeah it'd probably make me lose weight okay how about this because anything is possible yeah right the famous quote was um happiness to see a bristol in your rearview mirror. Who said that?

Dan Patrick?

I can't remember, but it was a former anchor.

But listen, Keith Olbermann did not go on the best of terms.

He's now back at ESPN.

He's been back several times.

What are the odds?

You two go back to ESPN.

I go back to ESPN one day?

Zero.

I'm not saying 0%.

I'm going to say 1% because if they make us president of the entire company,

if we end up owning ESPN one day,

then I will go back and I will just program myself onto every show.

I would love for them to make me a godfather offer and then I can make it public. I can go Adnan on them and just fucking leak it and be like, turn it down.
Right. And then you don't have any proof of that.
I'm like, yeah, I do. Yeah, Adnan.
Yeah, here we go. And so that would be my move.
How often were you guys actually in Central Connecticut? I saw you the one time. Three times.
Thrice. You didn't gain enough of an impression of it.
I did not fall in love with Bristol. No.
No. Now, I've also heard that some people have run into trouble there for accidentally stealing over the course of the years.
And that's something that we could find ourselves in some hot water. What? Like office supplies? Yeah.
Well, no. It was either like Mack Brown or Bill Pulliam.
Yeah. I've heard both stories yeah i've heard both stories snacks mini caps yeah so listen those guys are used to programs where literally everything's on the house like i'm gonna take that couch room to like go ahead it's fine right you are running the program right yeah mac brown could walk into any store in texas and just take whatever he wanted off the shelf right so bag of chips you're like is that really going to be an issue exactly like tomorrowland didn't do well is that is that on us right right right cloney bomb now so we can't get snacks that's not good i'm gonna say one percent just in the event that they they would make me like an executive there and i would just get to debate steven a smith i would go back for that it's behind the scenes debate just for the love of the sport just have him in my office all day yelling at him but i'm sure people still ask they ask me oh you worked at espn what's steven a smith like i think that's like when you're removed from it now you realize that everything is steven a yeah he's a star like you could ask me any question you know, all the Eastman people I know, everyone's like, oh, you worked at ESPN, what's Stephen A.
Smith like? I think that's, like, when you're removed from it now, you realize that everything is Stephen A. Yeah, he's a star.
Like, you could ask me any question. You know, all the ESPN people I know, everyone's like, oh, just Stephen A.
stories. I just want him.
So give us your best Stephen A. story.
I think it's, listen, I think he's a nice guy, but obviously he plays into the role of trolling and having fun. So I'm filling in on Mike and Mike, and I was smashing Concussion, the Will Smith movie, because I just said it was a terrible film.
Total truth.

Total truth.

Yeah, right, right.

Yeah, thank you.

Total truth.

And he tweeted and he goes,

and he tweets at me.

I think he follows zero people.

He's probably like Jay Billis.

He follows one guy maybe.

And Stephen A. just goes,

yo, Adnan, you're doing a great job,

but don't you ever come at my man Will Smith

like that with that kind of disrespect.

And I'm like, wait,

I just got called out by Stephen A. Smith on Twitter.

Retweet, like, can I retweet this more? I want to retweet it once a week. Just like, hey, Stephen A.
Smith called me out. Clown me.
Take that, Burke. I like that.
He's going to get $10 million. And he's going to be worth every penny because he works his ass off.
I talked to somebody that works over there and they said a very interesting point, which is like Stephen A. and Max.
Max thinks it's a debate show. Stephen A.
knows it's an entertainment show. Stephen A.
gets it, and he can pretty much name his price right now. Especially now, if I said to you guys, what are you watching and you're just going to listen to? Levitard's show is hysterical, right? Because those guys get it.
They know that it's fun, it's loose, and it's great. And as far as live events, like obviously, I watched Federer Djokovic.
I was living and dying with Roger. Oh, yeah.
Dude, I can't believe you're damn it. Djokovic is the GOAT.
No, you're brutal. I said big head of message.
How much does it suck to root for a guy who keeps losing to Djokovic? I couldn't believe you said to me Djokovic is your GOAT. He is.
But Roger's the greatest of all time. Okay, but then what happens when he plays Djokovic? Listen.
Weird. The guy who was 38 years old.
How do we end that conversation so fast? He's almost 38 years old, and he took him to a tie-break, the first ever in the history of Wimbledon, five sets, and you're going to call him a loser? Yeah. That was a victory for mankind.
See, that's bullshit. Absolutely.
He's the GOAT. He's the GOAT, but he's out there doing it.
Yeah. He's 38, and he almost won.
Two match points. Sprayed a forehand, two championship points, and then the approach shot did not go deep enough, and Djokovic ripped across the winner.
Yikes. He's not even going to have the numbers.
20 majors.

That's the number one all time.

Okay.

How many is Sampras have?

Sampras is 14.

Yeah, Sampras, but his were more impressive.

You can make the quality over quantity debate.

No, no.

No one's saying that.

Yeah, so everyone says, oh, Federer and Djokovic, they have to deal with higher levels of competition.

Correct.

Disagree.

Sampras was just that much better than everybody else that he was playing at the time.

What is tricky in all seriousness is Federer came up when those guys were fading, like Sampras, Agassi. Correct.
Yeah, he never had to face Sampras in his prime. And now he's late in his career facing these guys in the prime.
So it is tricky. You can't line up Federer's career.
It's not like Bird and Jordan. They're not at the same time.
Yeah, Bird and Magic. Yeah, Bird was better.
Yeah, Djokovic. That's easy.
That's an easy bad comparison. Djokovic is going to end up with the most Grand Slams and will have a better record against Federer all time.
Even then he will be the GOAT. Yeah, he will.
Here's why. Rod Laver does not have the most majors all time.
But if you ask tennis aficionados, they say Rod Laver's the greatest of all time. Well, I don't give a fuck about tennis aficionados.
I've been a tennis fan for one day, and I've already quit the sport. I'm not going to US Open.

It's over. But it's like saying Derek Jeter

is better than Cal Ripken because he has this many World Series

championships. Yeah.
Fair.

It doesn't go that way.

Good point. If you want to go that one

better, Federer is still the best. Yeah, but Joe

will have more. Cal Ripken never earned pinstripes.

What happens if he doesn't? Can I come back on the show?

Yeah, of course. And I'll be like, I do not want to talk

about tennis.

You can come back and I'll be like, no thanks. We'll talk cereal.
Can I make those cookies again? All right, Adnan, thank you so much. Find him on DAZN.
Co-host of the GM Shuffle and Cinephile. Yeah.
You can get them both on Apple? Apple, Stitcher, all those places where podcasts are found. Perfect.
Thank you for having me. Yeah.
Thank you for coming. I feel like we're still putting a word for me to have me here.
No, no. No.
We like you.'t care what everyone else says about you we like you on this show yeah i got two yeah exactly a lot of people say that you're kind of fucked up guy right right yeah leak everything we're like no it's okay you guys knew my reputation before i even met you all right thanks man thanks guys the barstool golf time app makes it easy for golfers to find the best tee times at the best prices. Stop searching all over Google for your next tee time.
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It is the one day only Christmas in July sale. Get your PMT merch while supplies last at store.barstoolsports.com okay let's get to some segments hank first up bachelor talk for guys that don't watch the bachelor but you watch the bachelor well i was watching first man so i was kind of in and out of watching uh it was fair enough the men tell all episode so i missed the beginning but this is what happened luke.
showed up to the rose ceremony with an engagement ring. Despite being sent home by Hannah last episode.
Psycho move. Things almost get...
That'll work, right? When you get broken up with, the best thing that you can do is just be like, hey, we're getting married, right? Yeah. Things almost get almost between Luke P.
and the other guys before Hannah sends him home again. That is what Trent sent me.
It says things almost get almost between Luke P and the other guys before Hannah sends him home again. Wait, things almost get almost? That is what Trent sent me.
Okay. It says things almost get almost between Luke P and the other guys before Hannah sends him home again.
So I'm guessing this was hot because the second part that I saw, which was like the tell-all episode where it's all the cast come back together. Mm-hmm.
It was Luke P and then whatever, the other 20 guys. And the other 20 guys just went down in a line, just roasting the absolute shit out of Luke P.
Like, he just stood there. Mike called him a narcissistic, cantankerous misogynist.
And then it was just like, the next guy, roast. Next guy, roast.
It sounded like a chocolate milk ad right there. I like this.
He said that. Yeah.
That's nice. So, yeah, it's like in his brain, that's like when a woman, if she gets broken up with, then she like fakes a pregnancy or she like shows an ultrasound.
Take me back. That sort of thing.
In the dumb guy's brain, it's like, oh, you broke up with me. Well, we're actually engaged.
Yeah. Sorry.
Let's just get married. I love you so much.
And then finally, Hannah had to come out during the tell-all episode and address Bachelor Nation like she was like a president. And she was like she had to apologize for not realizing how much of an asshole Luke P was and for keeping him around as long as she did.
She had to be like, Bachelor Nation, I need to tell you this. I'm sorry.
Bachelor Nation, listen up. She's sorry for giving him a platform.
Yeah. Okay.
So Hannah P, are we... Luke P.
Oh, no. Luke P is canceled.
Hannah B. Hannah B, Luke P.
Damn, I get those confused. So what are we down to?

Last three.

And who are they?

Pilot Pete.

Jed.

Tennessee Jed.

Uh-huh.

I forgot the third guy. The guy with the sister.

The hot guy.

Yeah.

Tyler C.

The hot guy.

Okay, Tyler C.

Which one of these was a quarterback at Wake Forest?

I don't know.

Colton?

Okay.

That sounds right.

I mean, I don't know.

I don't know anything about one of the contestants that was a quarterback at Wake Forest. that sounds right i mean i don't know i don't know anything about

one of the contestants that was a quarterback at wake forest that sounds right yeah yeah okay so we're i think there's two more episodes all right and then we're done yeah maybe one interesting okay stay informed i feel like they will draw that out as possible as long as possible yeah there's probably gonna be two more there's it's always funny on mondays when you just see all the tweets firing off.

Oh yeah, this show's on again.

Yeah, it's very puzzling.

It's so funny on Mondays when you just see all the tweets firing off. Oh, yeah, this show's on again.
Yeah, it's very puzzling. It's so lame that people watch that show.
Like, be a real man and watch three hours of Monday Night Raw just so that Stone Cold can come out for the last five seconds. I don't know who I'm talking about, but, yeah, I did that last night.
Watched literally every second just for Stone Cold. Was it worth it? Yeah, I mean, when the glass shatters glass shatters it's always worth i could see john cena pulling that move and just bringing a ring out be like hey we're engaged again yes hey nicky bella we're back uh all right king state kings andy reed so andy reed when asked uh what he did in the off season what was his answer he just he go well they asked him if he did anything fun or exotic this off season.
And his answer was, well, I attacked a couple, a couple of chili rellenos. So that's classic Andy Reed, that little gourmand.
That also is great because it's Andy Reed, a fat guy move. Like he definitely started eating them.
He was like, these are delicious. And then ate them for every meal.
He's like, I got going to keep him. Hey, what do you think? What do you want for dinner tonight, honey? What about chili reannos? I really liked it last night and for lunch.
It's such a perfect Andy Reid food, too, just the way that I can imagine him saying it. It's like kind of festive and a little bit kind of like wild.
He does a little dance, a little cha-cha-cha when he says it to his wife. Like, how about a little chili reannos? It's chili reanno Thursday tonight.
Let's go, honey. Yeah, plug it up, plug it up.
Just eating all the cheese to stop the run explain it to hank what is a chili relleno it is a deep fried poblano pepper that's filled with meats and cheeses and sometimes you get wacky with it it was like some pumpkin seeds and some sauce around sauce on the outside put a little creme fraiche on the outside just a real treat of a pepper but you're. Yep.
Deep fried. Deep fried stuffed with meat.
Yeah, but it's still vegetables. It's like Mexican haggis.
Yeah. It's like when you get, what is it, the tempura, like string beans.
It's just deep fried vegetables. Yep.
Love it. Best way to do it.
All right. Thoughts and prayers to USA basketball.
So no one wants to play for USA basketball. Yeah, everyone keeps bowing out.

Except all the good players.

Their roster is down to like, who's on it, Hank?

Kevin Love.

Marcus Smart.

Jalen Brown.

Harrison Barnes.

It's all Celtics.

They just made it all Celtics.

Julius Randle.

So now Bill Simmons is going to be the U.S. number one basketball fan.

I have a question.

Why isn't Mellow?

Is U.S. basketball having a moment right now? Yeah, Mellow should be on it for sure.
Why not Mellow? You need an old head, right? He should be the guy. I want Mellow to keep playing for USA basketball forever.
Maybe all these players are leaving because they're afraid that they might miss a call from one of us after what happened to Blake last year. Yes.
It's like they don't want to make the same mistake. Yeah, I guess that's probably true.
Uh-huh. If they get caught up in some weird award that we made up.
Did Blake Griffin kill USA basketball? Wow. People are asking.
Wow. They're starting to ask.
It's a question. It's a question.
Maybe they just don't want to be invited to the White House if they win. It's a question.
All right. Last up, before we get to guys on chicks, PMT Sports Biz with Jake Marsh, who's been killing it for us this summer.
Let's kick it to that. Good morning.
This is Jake Marsh with the PMT Sports Biz Minute. The 2020 Olympic Games in Tokyo are exactly one year away.
And the official emblem is a harmonized checkered pattern. It features the traditional Japanese color of indigo blue, which expresses a refined elegance and sophistication that exemplifies Japan.
If you were to dissect what the PMT logo represents, you've got a mix of loyalty blue, simplicity is beige, perfection for white, green is harmony, red equals love, and black is the color of mystery. Couldn't have said it better myself.
Aaron Boone's rant last week got me thinking. Why the heck do baseball managers wear full uniforms? Well, in the 19th century, there was something called a captain who determined the batting order, made pitching changes, and more.
Basically what we call a player coach today. Imagine if other sports did this.
Give me Coach O and a helmet and full pads, parlayed with Greg Popovich, and that's your PMT Sports Biz Minute. Mr.
Cat, Mr. Commenter, back to you.

Wow, that was informative.

Great job.

Very cool, Jake.

PMT Sports Biz Minute with Jake Marsh.

Jake's been doing a great job this summer for real.

Mr. Cat, Mr.
Commenter.

That's not your content.

I've been – I don't want to talk about Darren.

Nope, nope.

Bleep out that name, as a matter of fact.

Okay, can I talk about it real quick?

We don't say his name.

The Cubs have a player named Robel Garcia,

and every time I go to type Robel,

I think of Rovell, and it fucking bothers me.

Does it autocorrect on your phone?

Yeah, and it bothers me.

That sucks.

It bothers me.

Once AI services have figured out that I type in that name,

at that point, that's when I'm opting out. I am on Fitzgerald's side on this.
It fucking sucks. No phones.
It sucks. Alright, guys on chicks, Hank.
Alright, Jake sent me these, so this is a raw run-through. Oh! Okay, raw dog.
You go raw dog, this bad boy? Let's see how good he's been doing. Let's see Jake.
Skin to skin. Hey, boys, especially Hank.
I got a spray tan this past week. Oh yeah, Jake sent you these.
That's already gone. I got a spray tan this week where you stand naked and a rando tanning salon worker sprays your body with tanning magic.
My boyfriend's weirded out that I was naked in front of a stranger. My response was it's less weird than being naked in front of my friends.
So can you help my boyfriend settle this argument once and for all? Is it weirder to get a spray tan from a stranger or to shower with your friends, i.e. post-sports practice? I think it's weirder.
What does i.e. mean? That's like an example.
Oh, okay. For example.
An example? Mm-hmm. Wouldn't it be an example? I don't know what it stands for.
An exemplar. Such as.
Yeah. Is what it means.
Women, in general, I feel like, are a lot more comfortable being naked. Well, here's the deal.
There's not as much of a variance on women's bodies as there is on guys. So here's what I'm getting at.
It's, it's easier to, to look at a woman to look at another woman with her clothes on and be able to tell within a reasonable like distance what she might look like naked in terms of all the size of the different body parts with a guy if you look at a guy you can't really imagine like sure some guys like me have big dick energy and so they could be like oh yeah i bet that guy's walking around with a tuna can between his legs but when it comes to like women you can get a pretty good example like i'm looking at you right now big cat yeah i have a pretty good example what those tits look like when you pop that top off yeah right no actually that's not true if you didn't know you wouldn't know that i have huge nipples that's true well nipples are a little bit different okay well yeah that's nipples that's kind of the point nipples are the balls of the chest they're very different every single nipples made differently i think it's i think it's very healthy for uh for a woman to get a spray tan from a stranger.

They're just a lot more...

The question is, is it weirder for naked in front of a stranger

or naked in front of your friends?

I think it's weirder for...

I think women, just in general, are more comfortable being naked.

Like, they do it in front of their friends more often.

At sleepovers, dudes are a little bit more shy.

The only time guys are really comfortable being naked around other guys is when they're

making jokes about themselves.

Yeah.

Busting balls.

It's the straightest thing in the world to look at another naked dude and then make fun

of them.

Yeah.

Or doing the old like when you're like, I got gum on my jeans and it's actually your

ball.

That joke is not appropriate anymore.

Hey, boys, especially you functional drug addict PFT.

I'm just going to ride with it. You got to, dude.
You made me ride with anti-vaxxing. You can't be upset about it.
We both, I put a lot more needles in my arms than your son gets. Yeah, see? My boyfriend and I have been together for two years, and he's a huge Steelers fan.
I love him, but there's a huge problem. He refuses to have sex with me unless I wear a Troy Paul Mall jersey and a giant afro wig.
This is not real not he only wants to do doggy style and go to the next one jake come on jake that's fake come on jake jake jake's fakes i mean no that was a real chick because she said what's up to pft yeah that's jake's fakes hey big cat pft and jake i bet you're all wondering why i didn't acknowledge hank that's where my relationship issues start my boyfriend and I are avid fans of PMT. We listen to every episode, but for some reason he is intimidated by sweet young Hank.
Crazy, right? If I laugh at something Hank says during an episode, it's treated like I just cheated on him in front of his face. I believe this.
I can never agree with Hank's Mount Rushmore's, so it's basically a debate between PFT and Big Cat, which is the equivalent to comparing shit to throw up because they're both equally awful. how do you get over being jealous of young Hank Lockwood? I think Hank has to shave.
I think that's really the only way. Or we can help your relationship by reminding everyone that Hank can't get hard.
That's not true. That's true.
Well, look, hey, I'm not an anti-vaxxer. PFT is not a drug guy.
You can't. You can get hard.
We all get to have to deal with. We have to tell one lie about everybody else on the podcast that you just see how it goes around.
I guess I whatever. That's Hank.
Here's the solution. Hank, just stop being so charming all the time on the show.
I actually you're a very charming person. And honestly, like I get a little bit jealous of you sometimes, too.
I 100% believe this. Because, you know, Pia Thea and I are a little older and funnier than Hank.
And so when Hank says something, and she's probably right around Hank's age, so he's the attainable one. We're like way out of her league.
We're fucking stars. Yeah, she might as well wish to go fly to the moon to get with one of us.
But when it's Hank, it's like, oh, yeah, that's just my harmless mix of behavior. It'd be like saying you don't care about Vinny Chase because he's unattainable.
You're like, oh, I really have the hots for turtle. Yeah.
Hank. Or E.
Or E. She laughed at that one.
You watch Entourage, too? Yes, she does. Okay.
Hank, say something non-threatening. Say something to kind of bring yourself down a peg real quick.
Just help this person. Read a chocolate milk ad.
That's the thing. I don't think I'm very impressive on this show.
It's nice to know that someone thinks so. I want you to tell this listener that you're not going to sleep with his girlfriend.
I'm not going to sleep with your girlfriend. There you go.
That should be enough. Yeah.
Because he can't. Sup, Dave and Busters guys.
My friend and I were debating the other day. What's the difference between a side bitch and a side piece? Whoa.
Is there one, Jake? That's offensive language. That's very offensive.
Side piece. We don't say that.
Set me up, Jake. Set him up.
Bad questions. Go to the last one.
Sup, fellas. I honestly think.
That's a terrible question, Jake. I'll tell you what it is.
I think a side bitch is... It's the same thing.
What about my side hoe? A side bitch is something... What about my slam piece? ...that you make up if you don't actually have a side piece.
What about my fuck buddy? You're like, oh, I got a side bitch. No, that person doesn't exist if you're calling her a side bitch.
Yo, I don't even like yeah i just fuck her every weekend and go to the brunch with her but i don't i don't like her no yeah her mom's cool oh man her dad is like my best friend this totally real slam never slam hoe keeps texting she's never gonna be my girlfriend sup oh what's up dad cat pft and fisherman of the year hang oh i'm a waitress see that's how you know because I usually try and filter them out because I know when I say myself, you guys are like, that's not true. I'm a waitress at a well-known restaurant and have recently slept with a guy who is a regular.
Turns out he has slept with a lot of waitresses. Should we confront him, refuse him service, or just decline his advances? P.S.
It's not Dave & Buster's. Okay.
Yeah, no, it's Perkinson's Tiger Woods. Yeah, it's a very specific type of game that you have to have to be able to pick up a waitress, too.s it's not dave and busters okay yeah no it's perkinson tiger woods yeah it's a very specific type of game that you have to have to be able to pick up a wet a waitress too and it's i've never had that because it's it's like a very narrow time frame that you have to like initiate the pickup line then follow up on it well it's also that stuff like there's a certain sleaze factor because if you are routinely picking up people at restaurants that means you probably fucked in your Toyota Camry.
Yeah. Multiple times.
An awesome car. Yeah.
I'll go one step. A very average car.
Because you can afford to eat out at restaurants all the time, so you have a great car. Go to Applebee's with your Toyota Camry, and you watch Andy Dalton.
I'm going to take it one step further. Anybody that routinely picks up on anyone at work.
She's dying're if you're picking up women at their place of business on a consistent basis that's just kind of a weird move too yeah yeah i mean it's the whole thing is kind of a legend though i mean in some absolute ledge to to your friends who call uh women slam pieces and slam bitches you a ledge. Big time ledge.
My slam piece over at Outback. Yeah, she hit me up.
I probably won't fuck her tonight. Okay, we'll see everyone Friday.
Love you guys. Talking away.
No, I don't know what to'm about to say I'll say it anyway Today is another day To find you shying away I'll be coming for your lover Okay Take on me Take on me Take me. Some little wait.
Slowly learn if that life is okay.

Say after me.

It's better to be safe and sorry.

Take on me.

Take on me.

Take on me.

Take on me. I'll be there.
It's Pardon My Take presented by Barstool Sports.