SB MVP Julian Edelman + Mt Rushmore Of Ways To Procrastinate

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Speaker 1 On today's part in my take, we have Super Bowl MVP Julian Edelman in studio. Thirst Trap and Jewels is what they call call him.
They call him that after this interview.

Speaker 1 We have NBA Awards, Hot Seat, Cool Throne, Guys on Chicks, and

Speaker 1 the Mount Rushmore of Ways to Procrastinate.

Speaker 1 I think that will hit home for a lot of people who are probably listening to this right now, who may be going to their job, maybe going to their summer job, maybe having to take summer school, whatever it may be.

Speaker 1 There are things in your life that you're trying to procrastinate. And we have the Mount Rushmore of Ways to Procrastinate Before Doing Something.

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Speaker 1 Okay, let's go.

Speaker 1 No place to hang out on washing.

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Speaker 1 And then we take it higher

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Speaker 1 Welcome to part of my take presented by the Cash App. Go download it right now.
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Today is Wednesday, June 26th.

Speaker 1 Do we care about the NBA awards? I don't really, but I do care about people who care about the NBA awards. So put it this way: wasn't really interested in seeing who won the MVP.
Giannis won.

Speaker 1 I think that was probably fair.

Speaker 1 Well, no, most people, there's a lot of people who wanted James Harden. Yeah, so I didn't really care.
I think, like, Giannis, yeah, good decision, good basketball player.

Speaker 1 But I did start to care once Daryl Maury and the Rockets get involved and they start tweeting out very bitter things about James Harden and his man boobs not winning yes the NBA MVP because then at that point now it becomes a story.

Speaker 1 Daryl Maury did an interview on the red carpet. Well actually let me back up.
I don't care because this is the most NFL move by the NBA to make the awards after everything's done. Like, who cares?

Speaker 1 I was actually shocked that it was happening. I looked on Twitter.
I was like, wait, we didn't already decide the MVP.

Speaker 1 I remember the days when we gave out the MVP in the second round and then we had awkward moments when Dirk won his MVP after losing in the first round, is the one season. That's tough.

Speaker 1 Those are the moments that I remember. I want those moments back.
I don't want a fucking award show on a random Monday in June. This would be a good time for Major League Baseball to do their awards.

Speaker 1 Yes.

Speaker 1 It feels just as appropriate as when they do it. Major League Baseball does it like over Thanksgiving.
Like, hey, here's who won the Cy Young. And so they count the awards,

Speaker 1 they don't include postseason, right? So it doesn't matter what you do after the end of the regular season. But mentally, it's already been decided.

Speaker 1 But mentally, we do as fans, like they've already cast their vote before the postseason starts. But I'm thinking, of course, James Harden didn't win it because the Rockets flamed out again.

Speaker 1 Like that makes sense to me. Right.
But apparently, that's not how it works. It's so stupid that they do it this way.
They should just do it right before the playoffs.

Speaker 1 Get everyone like, hey, here are the awards for the season.

Speaker 1 So the Rockets, Daryl Maury on the red carpet, trying to like, you know, put a wet towel on these rumors that Chris Paul and James Harden hate each other.

Speaker 1 That guy, I don't know I don't know who dressed him, who got him ready, but he looked like he hasn't shaved in forever. He looks like he hasn't slept.

Speaker 1 And he basically had to get in front of everyone and be like, did you hear his speech? He said, why aren't we talking about the Rockets being the Western Conference favorites next year?

Speaker 1 Why are we talking about this? Why isn't anybody having that discussion? Everyone should be. That's such an electric point to bring up right now.
He's definitely talking about 2020 Gods in June.

Speaker 1 Darren Mori is like one of those nerds that has tried to roughen his edges a little bit.

Speaker 1 To me, he looks like if Mickey Rourke played Darren Ravel in a movie. Right.
Just like if Ravel grew out that stubble, got punched in the face a few times in Reno, and woke up after a bender.

Speaker 1 That's Darramora.

Speaker 1 The Rockets stuff is so funny to me because Chris Paul also had a quote that was essentially the I'm not owned, I'm not owned as I shrank the drill tweet. He said, I never asked for a trade.

Speaker 1 I never demanded a trade. I'll be in Houston.
I'm happy about that. I'm very happy.
happy about that. I'm good.
I'm very happy. I'm not laughing.
I'm laughing. This is so funny.

Speaker 1 You guys thinking that that me, Chris Paul, notorious, tough person to play with, is not vibing with James Harden, also notorious, tough person to play with? Huh? That's funny to me, guys.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I'm laughing here. That's a joke.
That's how funny it is. Doesn't the NBA or the NFL, they do it the night before the Super Bowl? Correct.
I like that. Does that make sense?

Speaker 1 That's actually the best. So the NFL, say what you want about their scheduling because they do the thing where they like announce when they're going to announce the schedule for next year.

Speaker 1 They're big on announcements of announcements. They basically hand out out save the dates all year round.

Speaker 1 You're getting save the dates to put on your refrigerator from the NFL from point A to point Z. With the NFL, at least they do that at like an appropriate time.
Right.

Speaker 1 Black tie affair, night before the Super Bowl. This is where I get exhausted by this league.
And I love the NBA and I love basketball, but when you have an award show in June, I get exhausted.

Speaker 1 And Giannis, I think he should have won MVP. A lot of people were mad.
I don't really even know what other awards got handed out.

Speaker 1 I think Coach Buds won the, so Milwaukee took home Coach of the Year and MVP.

Speaker 5 Doc Rivers' reaction to that was great.

Speaker 1 Oh, yeah, he was mad. Lou Williams won sixth man of the year for like the third, seventh time in a row, which is hilarious because he's just like, can we just say Lou Williams is awesome?

Speaker 1 Like, he's the sixth man because he comes off the bench, but he's a starter because he's fucking awesome. Yeah, he's fresh legs.
That's why they should bring

Speaker 1 it off the bench. We've talked about that.
Like, a great award. Sub is better than a starter sometimes.
What was Doc Rivers' reaction? Was it like the famous gif of him where he just looks puzzled?

Speaker 5 It was more like angry. It was more like, what the fuck?

Speaker 1 He thought he was about to walk up to the stage, and when they called someone else, he he was just like uh he gave like a dirty look and was just like kind of shook his head i'll say this doc rivers appeared to be a better coach when he had his son on the team because his son was such like a shithead that if you could squeeze a little bit of blood out of austin rivers then you looked like a fucking genius yes you should not got you should not have gotten rid of one of your worst players i'm looking through the awards right now lifetime achievement magic johnson and larry bird uh genie bus actually answered like for the first time to the media what happened with magic she just essentially said yeah i kind of wish she had told me but Magic will be Magic.

Speaker 1 So he gets a pass for that. House of Highlights, Moment of the Year, Derek Rose for dropping that 50 burger.
That's legit.

Speaker 1 Moment of the year. Teammate of the Year and Sportsmanship Award of the Year.
Mike Conley Jr. won both.
Okay.

Speaker 1 What does Teammate of the Year mean? I don't know. I think it just means like if you're rich and you don't act rich.
Yeah, then you get teammate of the year. If you buy everyone dinner.

Speaker 1 Yeah, you're not showing up your teammates. Yeah, the assist of the year, which Community Assist Award, Bradley Beale.
Nice. That's good.
They should just do a single Assist of the Year. Yes.

Speaker 1 They should do like Dribble of the Year, Assist of the Year, This League of the Year, Tweet of the Year. Charge of the Year.
Yeah, I emoji of the Year.

Speaker 1 Something for the referees, like Call of the Year. Yes.
Good call of the year. Joey Crawford comes up and dances and does like skips across the stage.
Yeah, and then blows his whistle. Boom.

Speaker 1 They really do need to do takes.

Speaker 1 Yeah. I guess that's why we have the takies.
Yes, that is exactly why we have the takeies. So yeah, overall, I don't really care about the NBA awards.

Speaker 1 I do care about this league coming up for the free agency. You know what we should do? We should have as an award in the Takeys

Speaker 1 the Doc Rivers of the year and then give it to not Doc Rivers and just see what his reaction would be. Get him just even more mad.
Come on.

Speaker 1 Hank, Kemba Walker is now a quiet suitor for... Stealth.
Stealth suitor for the, or the Celtics are a stealth suitor for Kemba Walker. Thoughts?

Speaker 5 It'd be awesome. Makes a lot of sense.
He's already got some New England roots. Yukon.
He's a bit of a hero already.

Speaker 3 He's a husky.

Speaker 5 He's a husky, and he's an amazing player. Yeah, he is.
He's one of those guys.

Speaker 5 that's like he's played in Charlotte, so people haven't, he might not have got the recognition that some other players have got, but he would be great.

Speaker 1 The money, though, is so the Super Max.

Speaker 5 That's the list, this league. It's like...

Speaker 1 Right, it's $221 million I think he can earn with the Hornets versus, I think, $150 or $140 with any other team.

Speaker 1 Now it's four years versus five years, so it's not exactly apples to orange, but it's always funny when we hear, like, I feel if the Hornets offer him the Super Max, which they sort of have to do, he's got to take it, right?

Speaker 1 So, what do they have to do? How do the Celtics

Speaker 1 have like a mystery suitor out of all this? Why weren't we talking about the Celtics last week?

Speaker 5 I don't know. I guess because there's interest now, and the Celtics, like Horford's gone, the Celtics realize that they're probably going to be getting rid of a lot of their money.

Speaker 1 So, they don't have to, but it's the Super Max is so fascinating because it essentially was supposed to put in place so that players stay on these teams.

Speaker 1 But then you get a classic Kemba Walker where Kemba Walker is and Anthony Davis.

Speaker 1 yeah but well anthony davis didn't want to get super max that's why he wanted to trade but but it's kemba walker is like the perfect case of he's good but he's not super max good i think they also they gave it such a cool term super max right that it's tough to turn down he should have done the hornet should have done the boogie cousins and traded him because if you trade them if you trade someone they can't get the super max that's why boogie cousins didn't want to get traded right and basically almost defend yourself from stupidity.

Speaker 1 Like, hey, Kemba Walker, we really like you, but we know we're going going to be dumb and offer you $221 million. So let's just eliminate this problem.

Speaker 1 Wait, so then the new team, can they do the Super Max? They can't. They just take the Super Max off the table.
Void hired once you get traded. Now, what's a Section 10 contract?

Speaker 1 I'm learning all sorts of these terms from Woge. I don't know what that is.
Woge is tweeting out these bombs, expecting me to understand what a section 10. I think that's Mello's going to get, maybe?

Speaker 1 There's some contract for Mellow. I don't understand any of these contracts in the NBA.
The, hey, Mellows seems pretty depressed because he's throwing up jumpers in his gym by himself contract.

Speaker 1 Yeah, that's just

Speaker 1 lay him under the table.

Speaker 3 Yeah, let him play.

Speaker 1 Have Carmelo be an intern. Right, exactly.

Speaker 1 A working internship for the Lakers. I think Kawhi is going to stay in Toronto.
We're going to do a Sunday night.

Speaker 1 We're going to do a full recap of this league because we're going to tape after the 6 p.m. All the all these things I feel like have been decided.
Like, Kyrie is already signed with the Nets.

Speaker 1 Yeah, there's been some handshake deals going on. So Kimba is, he's kind of like a sane Kyrie, right?

Speaker 1 He's like a better version of Kyrie Irving that you'd want right now, which is weird to say that because like a year and a half ago, Kyrie Irving was, you know, he was the shit. He was the guy.

Speaker 1 But then did you see those quotes where too much YouTube?

Speaker 1 I really think it's not just the flat earth thing. I think Kyrie Irving spends an

Speaker 1 inordinate amount of time on YouTube.

Speaker 1 There was this tweet that was the quotes from Kyrie Irving's basically last four or five years where essentially he said that he hated like all his teammates and all his coaches at every stop.

Speaker 1 Like he wanted to demand a trade if LeBron came back to Cleveland. Then he couldn't get along with LeBron.
Then he couldn't get along with like the Celtics and Danny Ainge and Brad Stevens.

Speaker 1 Like, Like, hey, man, eventually you are the asshole, right? He should just play in big three. Right.
Fewer teammates to alienate. Yeah, they beef now, though.
They fight. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Yeah, there was a big fight. I think it was like Royce Smith versus,

Speaker 1 who is it, Josh Harris?

Speaker 1 Josh Smith. Always shooting threes.
Josh Smith. I fucking love Josh Smith because he was just always like, hey, I'm open for three.
Always.

Speaker 1 So, yeah, we'll get to this league on Sunday when it all breaks. We need to talk about the other this league, and that is the New York Mets being an absolute dumpster fire.

Speaker 1 Well, it's like it's a competition between the Mets and the Knicks to see who can be more embarrassing, which I love. Same colors.
It's just like. Oh, wait.
Hold on. Shout out to the Knicks.

Speaker 1 The Knicks need credit for, because the Knicks are at a point where they should get credit for not doing dumb things.

Speaker 1 Not taking Chris Paul's contract was the most anti-Knicks, Knicks thing that has ever been done. But I don't know if it was like their decision not to take the

Speaker 1 contract. But they

Speaker 1 walked into it. That's a classic Knicks move saying, oh, Chris Paul, he used to be awesome.
Let's take on three years, $40 million a year. We'll sell some tickets at the garden.
Right.

Speaker 1 James Dolan just couldn't hear his phone ring because he was jamming with the business. But they need credit.
I'm going to give the credit.

Speaker 1 I'm going to give the Knicks credit when they don't fuck up because I think it's only right.

Speaker 1 So now what they've been doing an excellent job at is just keeping their mouths shut while the Mets are the ones that have the entire distraction because not only, I guess, the general manager of the Mets is texting in-game roster moves to the manager while he's at home, not even at the stadium.

Speaker 1 Correct. I love that.
Like you're calling in a rules violation at the USGA. It's wonderful.

Speaker 1 So this, and now I'm sure Mets fans will tell me I'm way off on here, but I'm going to throw something out there that I feel like this story, it happens, it's a self-fulfilling prophecy.

Speaker 1 When you go down this spiral of every move is, you know, you have a guy try to fight a reporter on Sunday night. You have Mickey Calloway being an absolute idiot.

Speaker 1 So when things start to spiral, every move gets scrutinized and becomes the dumbest move ever.

Speaker 1 I would guess that most teams, not maybe most teams, but a lot of teams in Major League Baseball actually have this in place where the analytics guys hand the manager a sheet and they're like, This is what you, this is the plan today.

Speaker 1 Because a lot of teams do that now, where they essentially say, Here's the plan for what we're going to do, and basically takes the decision making out of the manager's hands.

Speaker 1 The fact that it was the GM who used to be an agent who's texting from his house makes it ridiculous and very Mets. And that's where it becomes, haha, look at the Mets.

Speaker 1 Like, if he was in the stadium, I feel like it's not even a story. But because he's sitting at home watching on TV and texting these moves, it's crazy.
It is insane that he's doing that.

Speaker 1 Like, yeah, I'm sure a lot of teams have an arrangement where they have a direct line from the club suite or whatever. A lot of the analytics guys basically tell the manager what to do at this point.

Speaker 1 Exactly. I just say take away their pinstripes.

Speaker 1 The Mets just haven't earned their pinstripes in the last, what, 35 years? Yeah, so they had that, and then they had the

Speaker 1 aforementioned Jason Vargas, Mickey Calloway trying to fight a, was it Newsday? I didn't even know Newsday was still around, Newsweek, Newsmax, journalist.

Speaker 1 Essentially, now, here's the story, and I actually kind of side with Mickey Calloway here. Hear me out.
They lose a heartbreaker to the Cubs.

Speaker 1 The Cubs win, you know, I think Javi Baias hit a home run like the eighth inning to win that game. And essentially, Mickey Calloway got dressed and was walking out of his office.

Speaker 1 And the Newsday reporter, Newsweek, whatever, said, see you tomorrow, which is the classic, like, oh, half day move that the asshole in the office pulls. Like, oh, taking it off early

Speaker 1 at 5.15. You literally say that every time somebody's.
Well, yeah, as a joke to do that. Right.
You're being an ironic asshole. Correct.
Gotcha. It's like the open bar.
Totally different. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Like, hey, let me buy you a beer at an open bar. Classic.
Right. So he does that, and I think that I have Mickey Calloway's back there.
I think that would piss me off.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I kind of agree with that too.

Speaker 1 And if you look at what's going on in our country as a whole, you're allowed to body slam journalists true you get one a year and you can still get elected to the senate now jason vargas is a different story because essentially the way i read it he just stared at the the reporter and then when the reporter noticed that they were locking eyes he just said i will knock you the out i like that that's a that is a that's a ryan leaf classic junior say out having to rake up ryan leaf trying to fight a reporter in the san diego chargers locker here's the problem though if you're going to threaten a reporter you can't let the reporter leave without getting into the physical altercation because what do you think they're going going to do?

Speaker 1 They're a reporter. They're going to report it.
They're going to report it. Right.
So you need to make hay while the sun shines, so to speak.

Speaker 1 You have those basically five to ten minutes to kick his ass. To kick a reporter's ass.
Yes. Yep.
And then he apologized, but didn't apologize. Do I have that right?

Speaker 1 And then had to go back and apologize? Yeah, he did a fake apology, and then I guess somebody else told him, wait, stick around. Your real apology is coming.

Speaker 5 Well, he did like a sorry, not sorry, and then people on Twitter freaked the fuck out, and then they basically made him come back out. We're like, you actually have to say sorry.

Speaker 1 Oh, that's so good so the mets i mean this is it it really does spiral fast one word speaking to spiral fast yeah tow that's you need it you need it how much how much more clear can the opportunity get for the new york mets your entire team is falling apart your your fucking manager's threatening to fight reporters you've got a general manager that's cucking your manager everything's going to hell in a handbasket there's one clear pathway out of this and that's tim tebow why don't they make tow the manager Because he can't hit a baseball.

Speaker 1 Right. And so he won't ever threaten to fight a reporter.
Right. He'll just threaten to circumcise him, worst-case scenario.

Speaker 1 That would be good to have Tebow be the manager and just have him take all the heat. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Listen, bring

Speaker 1 a path. In whatever case, but not as a baseball player.
Yeah. He's terrible.
Manager/slash leadoff hitter.

Speaker 1 Maybe, no, kind of like when they, you know, when a team gets like, oh, the Angels got the rally monkey or the cricket that the Royals had a few years ago.

Speaker 1 Just have Tebow, you know, maybe carry around a dog bone and be like, hey, it's Timmy or Stray Dog. Or just put Tim Tebow in a cage in center field.
Yes.

Speaker 1 And then just take like a curtain off the cage whenever you're down by two runs late in a ball game. Build a Devil Ray tank and have him just swim laps in the center field.

Speaker 1 Be like, Tim, you're actually just training for the Olympics next year in Japan. Yeah, no, it'll just be like an astro turf area with a tire that he can flip over.
Yes, yes.

Speaker 1 And box jumps that he can do. These are good ideas.
That's our rally, Tebow. These are good ideas.
Okay, let's get to our hot seat cool throne.

Speaker 1 Before we do that, if you want to watch Julian Edelman, who's very attractive, want to watch his interview, barsoolgold.com slash PMT, go watch it.

Speaker 1 You can watch all of our interviews, including the Monday episode with Ryan Rosillo and Mark Titus. And thank you to everyone who listened and enjoyed it.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I got a lot of really, really nice notes from people about that. Probably more so than any other episode that we've ever done.
I'm glad that people liked it.

Speaker 1 It's nice to do something a little bit different every now and again. So hopefully you enjoyed it.
It was entertaining for you. If you got something more from it, that's awesome too.

Speaker 1 Don't quit your job just because of that. Don't quit your job just because we said that at one point we quit our jobs.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 But if that's the path that you were going down anyways, I'm not going to stop you.

Speaker 1 Although, if you do quit your job and become super successful, make sure you mention that podcast when you do hit it big time. Oh, yeah, absolutely.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I was just a regular guy, and then I listened to these fucking idiots, and now

Speaker 1 at the acceptance speech, I want it to be us first, then God, then your parents. Yeah, then Marlin's man.

Speaker 1 Okay, so go watch barsoolgold.com slash PMT and thank you everyone for listening and reaching out. We appreciate you guys appreciating it.
Appreciate the appreciation. Appreciate you.
Yeah. Tebow.

Speaker 1 Hot seat, cool thrown. Hank, start.

Speaker 5 My hot seat is the Warriors training staff. So obviously, since the Durant injury, there's been rumors about how Durant was like rip shit over the Warriors.

Speaker 5 Training staff for kind of lying to him and telling him that the injury wasn't as bad and he wouldn't have to worry about getting it re-injured if he came back, which he obviously did.

Speaker 5 Then

Speaker 5 Iguadala went on the breakfast club today, saw that, and he basically revealed himself that he had a fractured leg in the 2018 playoffs. Pretty much.

Speaker 5 But that was kept under wraps and downplayed to the media. Yikes.
And he also said, like, they priced, the Warriors priced their real fans out. So he took some shots.
Damn.

Speaker 5 And he really fueled the fire that the Warriors training staff is a little sketchy and just looks after themselves.

Speaker 1 Well, I think that's true. They definitely did price a lot of the local fans out.
But I don't think that San Francisco moved to.

Speaker 1 Yeah, there you go, right there. there.
Yeah, they only sold seats to partial owners that were going to abuse players at the court side. The training staff thing is real though.

Speaker 1 If you get a bad training staff, if you get the mark of a bad training staff, bad medical team, I feel like that has a lot, like the Suns essentially got free agents and guys for a while there because everyone said, wow, their training staff was amazing, right?

Speaker 1 And so it's the reverse with a training staff that takes advantage of guys. And then you have the whole Kawhi load management.

Speaker 1 Oh, man, the Raptors did a a great job with his load management this year. And then the reverse of the team that lost to him saying they basically run the guys into the ground.

Speaker 5 And like a rumor is a rumor, but when Igu Dallas says, I myself, I was injured, I knew what I had, and they basically, I'm telling you that they tried to keep it under wraps and downplayed it to the media, like that, that basically confirms what they did to Durant.

Speaker 1 Doesn't that happen in every other sport where somebody has an injury? Like in hockey, it happens all the time. You don't want to let your opponent know exactly where you're weak at, right?

Speaker 1 They want your opponent to be thinking that Iggy could come back any given day. Like, it's just a bonus.

Speaker 1 True, but the problem is, obviously, Kevin Durant, if they did actually tell him there's no chance that he could re-injure it more,

Speaker 1 then it becomes a big deal. That is a very big deal right there.
I'm speaking for Iggy

Speaker 1 as that one specific example. Also, Steph Curry gets injured every single year.
Maybe it was actually

Speaker 1 maybe he's never injured and they just keep misdiagnosing him. Did he just say that you're injured when he feels totally healthy and then he's like, oh, I got to sit out today? Right.

Speaker 1 He just has small ankles. They're just Dr.
Nick for the Simpsons.

Speaker 1 Everything they get wrong, both good and bad. They went to Oakland Upstairs Medical College.
What's your cool throne, Hank? Europe. Ooh, I'm up? Europe.
Oh, Europe. Europe.

Speaker 5 They swept the NBA major awards. Greek MVP, French defensive player of the year, Slovenian rookie of the year.

Speaker 1 And Toronto won the NBA title. Yeah.
It's the most European country in North America. Europe.

Speaker 5 So, yeah, Europe's on the cool throne. I guess you could have put America on the hot seat, but I needed a cool throne, so I put Europe there.

Speaker 1 Okay, that's tough. Tough look for us stateside.
Fuck. We got to take basketball back.
But that means we finished second. Yes.

Speaker 1 And we across the board. So we finished second.
So we finished first on aggregate. Mm-hmm.
Okay, what do you got? Love.

Speaker 1 My hot seat is big ballers. Yeah.

Speaker 1 All big ballers are on the hot seat because LeVar Ball is no longer allowed to be featured on ESPN anymore after he made the mistake of hitting on Molly Kieram on the air as opposed to everybody else there that hits on her off the air.

Speaker 1 Right. So tough break for

Speaker 1 married to her. Yeah.
Yeah. That's true.
I'm aware. I'm fully aware.
But yeah, this is a tough look for big ballers.

Speaker 1 There were no warning signs that something like this was going to happen where maybe he was going to be a loose canon and say something inappropriate on the air.

Speaker 1 It's fine when you do it to a Cuomo brother, but when you start doing to Molly Kiram, it's an issue.

Speaker 1 When Stephen A. Smith gives you the stink eye.
Yeah, when Stephen A. Smith is like, this man is too horny for me to be sitting next to,

Speaker 1 you have a problem that you need to address. That's too far.
Too horny. What's your

Speaker 1 other hot seat is the new Sunday Night Football song.

Speaker 1 So the Oh

Speaker 1 Sunday Night. You know the one that we finally got around to acknowledging? Yep.
They're being sued for using that song because it's too much of a rip-off of another song. Which is...

Speaker 1 I forget the name. Under pressure song.
Yes.

Speaker 1 No, it is Vanilla Ice Ice Baby. Got it.
Because it has the

Speaker 1 Yeah, so I'm thinking they're going to bring back Waiting All Day for Sunday Night. I think they have to go back to the hits, right? Hell yes.

Speaker 1 They're waiting all day for Waiting All Day for Sunday Night. Same, yeah.
Same. That'll be nice.
So we got our fingers crossed for that. My cool throne is Earth

Speaker 1 because Jim Ursay, famous philanthropist, he just donated, I want to say,

Speaker 1 $5 million plus to a charity called Earth.

Speaker 1 Hang on, what is it called? Klein Earth. So

Speaker 1 it's a group of lawyers that sue for environmental causes. And Jim Ursay did this by buying two guitars at auction.

Speaker 1 One, he bought a six-string acoustic from Wish You Were Here by Pink Floyd, the one that they used to record that song, for $900,000. And he bought the Black Strat for over $4 million.
Nice.

Speaker 1 So I think we've addressed this before, but it's worth mentioning again that Jim Ursay actually believes that every guitar that's ever been played contains the music that has been played on it in the past.

Speaker 1 So he actually thinks that one day scientists will be able to extract the original sound of Wish You Were Here out of that instrument now that he has it. I don't see where he's wrong.

Speaker 1 No, I don't either. Yeah.
But yeah, so he spent $5 million. He's addicted to guitars.
He is. I think he's got like 300 guitars.
Jesus Christ.

Speaker 1 All right, my hot seat is Cam Newton. So you saw it, the video.
Cam Newton offering $1,500 cash to someone sitting in first class on a flight to France. Was it even first class? I think it was just.

Speaker 1 Extra legroom? Extra leg room, yeah. Okay.
He's a coach killer. So this is the hot seat is because Cam Newton, like,

Speaker 1 no one ever would do that deal. You have to offer $20,000, $30,000.
I don't even know if I would still do that because when you mentally get ready for a flight that far, you

Speaker 1 can't give up any kind of extra perks or anything. You can't go backwards.
You cannot.

Speaker 1 I would say a little bit less than that, depending on how big the individual in question was. Now, if it were me, I'd probably consider it if he came at me with like $5,000 as a starting price.

Speaker 1 But I will say that if you are like a Falcons fan or if you're a Saints fan and Cam Newton comes up to you to ask you this favor, this is like the moment of your life.

Speaker 1 This is the best possible scenario where you get, you're essentially tackling Cam Newton. Yeah.
You're punking Cam Newton and it's a story.

Speaker 1 He could offer you $50,000, $100,000, and you would be like, no, just so you could say, like, I inconvenienced him on this trip across the Atlantic. I'm the guy who said no to Cam Newton.

Speaker 1 Cam Newton has made or is going to make $140 million currently or he's made $104 million currently. He has to offer $50,000.

Speaker 1 Or at least like throw in that coat that looks like it's made out of Dalmatians. Yeah, or maybe the little lucky rabbit thing that he's got.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 If you have the Pharrell hat, give me the Pharrell hat. The real problem is Cam Newton should have just not gone on that flight.
Just said, wait,

Speaker 1 I have 16 C. Okay, I'll just wait till tomorrow.
My people just go and book me a real seat on this flight. So this was the problem because it was a replacement flight.

Speaker 1 So this was the one that he got moved on to, which is why he didn't have the extra. I still wouldn't go.
Listen, Vince Young had it all figured out. Vince Young, to his credit,

Speaker 1 he would just charter an entire commercial Southwest. Does Southwest fly to France?

Speaker 1 Sure. Sous.

Speaker 1 Sure.

Speaker 1 Le Sous.

Speaker 1 There's no first class on Southwest, but sure. That's right.
It's just a category. Well, everybody's first class

Speaker 1 on Southwest. And no one is.
Everyone. Everyone is.
No one is. Everyone is.
All All right. My other hot seat is the Willendas.
I fucking hate those people. That's all I wanted to say.
Me too.

Speaker 1 I'm so sick of them. I agreed.
And the

Speaker 1 thing that somebody's going to fall, and then you get strapped on.

Speaker 1 They're on straps, and those sisters singing about glory to God the whole time because, you know, really, God cares about you being an idiot and walking on a high wire over Times Square. Shut up.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 Do you think if God had an option of whose life to save, the rich lady that was walking 50 stories above Times Square, hooked onto a harness, putting her life in danger, or like an orphan in Syria that was trying to hide from cluster bombs.

Speaker 1 Which one do you think God would choose? Fuck the Walendas. So sick of them.
And it is bullshit that you watch it and you're just hoping.

Speaker 1 And it's probably on a tape today, so even if they did fall, we wouldn't get to see it. The whole thing sucks.

Speaker 1 The next time they do it, they're going to do a fake cut to commercial to make you think that somebody died. That's smart.

Speaker 1 All right, my cool throne is integrated ads because this league has now gone, has sold out. And we have our good friend, Blake Griffin, who's up for Blake of the Year.

Speaker 1 Is this Breaking Moose that you're doing right now? Oh, yeah. Is it Breaking Moose? No, no, it's not Breaking Moose.

Speaker 1 Blake Griffin, who is up for Blake of the Year, tweeted, hey, Boogie Cousins, unlike Paul Pierce, I score number twos in the basket and not on the court.

Speaker 1 Hashtag softlike Charmin, hashtag Charmin partner. And then Boogie Cousins went back with the beef and said, Paul Pierce, asked my two gold medals who the real amateurs are.
Damn, two gold medals.

Speaker 1 Fuck. And

Speaker 1 Blake Griffin, a soft like Charmin award might look good in your empty trophy case. Damn.
Damn. Really went after Blake.

Speaker 1 So, and then the best part about the whole thing was they went, you know, it was very clearly a toilet paper ad, and everyone was tweeting back, and Kendrick Perkins replied and said, hold up, did I miss something?

Speaker 1 So he just didn't realize that it was an ad. But he got involved in it.
He got involved.

Speaker 1 He was ready to beef. Kendrick Perkins could actually get involved in these ads because him and Nick Wright's bets are just ridiculous where they eat a shitload of food.
Yes.

Speaker 1 So that would be a perfect opportunity for a sponsorship from a toilet paper company. I just love that everyone knows it's an ad, and then Kendrick Perkins over the top is like, wait, we beefing?

Speaker 1 Yeah, Perk doesn't know what hashtag ad means. He just thinks it's like hashtag AD.
Yeah. Also, RJ Parrett pulled the classic on his Instagram stories, post with hashtag NBA Awards, Indochino, an ad.

Speaker 1 Which, by the way, is way better. Way better to do that.
Way better.

Speaker 1 If you're ever going to do an integrated ad like that, just straight up pull the Deshaun Jackson and just copy and paste the entire thing. Oh, you'll get so much more engagement.
Always.

Speaker 1 Okay, let's get to our interview with Julian Edelman. Hey, it's PFT here, reminding you that Boarshead makes game day entertaining elevated and effortless.

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Speaker 1 And here he is, Julian Edelman.

Speaker 1 Okay, we now welcome on recurring guest,

Speaker 1 Super Bowl MVP. T-shirt? Do I get a t-shirt? Oh, yeah, recurring guest t-shirt.
I'll be waiting for it. Okay, so Super Bowl MVP, since the last time you were on, you've won a Super Bowl MVP.

Speaker 1 It is Julian Edelman of the New England Patriots. Also a new contract, and he's got a Showtime special.
What is this thing? 100%? It's a documentary. Okay, so it's a documentary one night.

Speaker 3 One night. One night.
One night. They want to do a mini show.

Speaker 3 70 minutes.

Speaker 1 Are we going to be in it? Because I remember there was a camera crew that was tracking your recovery when we went to interview you that one time. What was that, like a year and a half ago?

Speaker 3 Yeah, you guys could be in it.

Speaker 1 Oh, wow. You're just saying that.

Speaker 1 You're just trying to get it. If you were smart, you'd put us in it so that we'd tweet about it because we're narcissistic.
Very much. You guys are in it.
Okay. No way.
There's no way we're in it.

Speaker 3 I'm just letting you know you're in it.

Speaker 1 All right. So, Julian's here.
100%. Watch it showtime on Thursday night.

Speaker 3 Thursday night. Thursday night.

Speaker 1 Friday. Friday.
Friday. Friday.
28th. People are like, 28th.

Speaker 1 9 o'clock. 9 o'clock, Friday night.
It's going to be off.

Speaker 3 Pregame. It's a pre-game type

Speaker 1 movie. While you're watching 100%.
Yes.

Speaker 3 Pregame while you're watching 100%.

Speaker 1 So

Speaker 1 it's good to see you, man. It's been a while.
Craig see you. We had you on a couple, it was about a year and a half ago when you were rehabbing your injury.

Speaker 1 Let's start with the Super Bowl and the MVP.

Speaker 1 Have you noticed a big difference in winning a Super Bowl, the first two that you won, and then winning a Super Bowl MVP? Because I feel like you've been out there a lot more.

Speaker 3 Not really, honestly. I mean, I think I've probably been out the same.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 3 You know, I've done a documentary about you this time.

Speaker 3 Yeah, but that was going on before we started filming that, like right after the injury in 2017.

Speaker 3 But, I mean, I guess there's a little more to it.

Speaker 3 You're a little busier, but I don't know.

Speaker 3 I just black out after each offseason. Yeah, me too.
You know what I mean? You get so focused about the season. You just forget about all that other stuff.

Speaker 1 So how soon after the injury were you like, I'm going to milk this. I'm going to make some money off of it and make a documentary out of it.

Speaker 3 So I'll tell you the real story.

Speaker 3 The year before, we were going to have cameras around all playoffs, the year that we won the Super Bowl against

Speaker 3 Atlanta.

Speaker 3 And

Speaker 3 I chickened out. I was like, I don't want this.
I don't want to mess with my routine.

Speaker 3 You know, I'm kind of superstitious with all that. I want

Speaker 3 everything focused on football. And so after we won the Super Bowl, my boy Soph comes to me and goes, that would have been a real good documentary to have.

Speaker 1 Yeah, you think? Yeah.

Speaker 3 You think?

Speaker 3 And so I was like, fuck, you know, you can't do that, whatever.

Speaker 3 And then I got hurt, and he came up to me and said, you know, all these people want to do a documentary on your recovery, this, that.

Speaker 3 And we decided to take the opportunity to do it ourselves, make our own one. So that's what we did.

Speaker 1 That's awesome. So, and we will be in it because we did go up and see you while you were rehabbing and interviewed you then.

Speaker 1 So the actual Super Bowl itself, were you shocked at any point where you're like, did they not know that Tom's going to throw it to me all these times? Because you were open on every play.

Speaker 1 And that's your own doing a lot of the times. But it felt like they were like, hey, we're just going to not cover Julian Edelman.

Speaker 3 I don't even know how to answer that. I just tried to do my job, get open and catch the ball.

Speaker 3 Sometimes, you know, our offensive. you know, our offensive coordinator, Josh McDaniels, did a good job of moving me around to get matchups.
And,

Speaker 3 you know, we just kind of went with it.

Speaker 1 You're doing Belichick's speech. Yeah, that's fine.
I just did my job. That's fine.

Speaker 1 Did you expect to be that open during the game?

Speaker 3 I mean, you always expect to be open when you have your number called.

Speaker 1 See, this is Belichick speech. I mean, it goes back to the KC game, too.
I wanted to talk about that.

Speaker 3 We almost lost that because of me.

Speaker 1 Right, but the Patriots also had that thing where when you do Madden and you find that one pass over the middle that your buddy can't guard and you just keep running it, that was to you over the middle over and over and over and the the chiefs just couldn't guard it

Speaker 1 hey you know we had a couple different coverages we had a couple different plays and you can't do this the whole interview no i won't do it the whole interview but when it has anything to do with football i'll probably end up doing this so i don't get mother effed by my coach okay how about how about this what was the one play from the super bowl that you made that maybe uh us fat sowers at home watching the game on the couch didn't pick up on as being like the key play of the game for you that you went back and saw on film.

Speaker 1 Like that one that you showed, I forget what game. It was probably in the Super Bowl against the Falcons where you hit that little chip block on the guy

Speaker 1 and woke you up a little bit. What was that play this year that you remember from the game that maybe we didn't notice?

Speaker 3 There was a play where I went in on the force again, and I tried to lay a little wood, and I forgot who it was, but he came and brought it too, and it woke me up, too.

Speaker 3 I think it was early in the series, early in the game, we were trying to run the ball, and

Speaker 3 they were stuffed in the box. I mean, that was a good defense.

Speaker 3 We can't just sit there and say, you know, we won that game full outright.

Speaker 3 I mean, they had a defensive line that was insane, so, like, it kind of affected everything, and then they were bringing guys in the box, and we were trying to do the other things, and we ended up putting in a play that we hadn't ran for so long, and it just so happened to be a play where I'd go and drop in for the force, and you know, that was kind of those types of plays that helped.

Speaker 1 Do you like running the ball?

Speaker 1 I do sometimes. You guys kind of changed it.
The Patriots kind of changed what, I mean, that's what what Belichick does better than anyone is changes even mid-season.

Speaker 1 You guys became a power-running team for a while there.

Speaker 3 Yeah, I think, you know,

Speaker 3 each week you're trying to learn yourself. You know, I've said this before.
You don't know what kind of team you are in September.

Speaker 3 You could be a completely different team going into December, depending on the strengths of your team, the weaknesses of your team, what's going on in the league, what people are playing against you.

Speaker 3 So, you know,

Speaker 3 it's definitely, you know, I definitely like running the ball because we got guys that are good with the ball in their hand. You know, you got Rex, Sony, Sweet Feet.

Speaker 3 You know, it's a little bit.

Speaker 1 James White.

Speaker 3 James White. Wisconsin baby.

Speaker 1 That's a cool nickname.

Speaker 3 He's got some sweet feet.

Speaker 1 Every Wisconsin running back who does anything good in the NFL, I have to talk about all the time to try to change the narrative from the guys that didn't do anything in the NFL.

Speaker 3 Well, he's done a lot. He's done a lot.

Speaker 1 Melvin Gordon. 15 catches.
Yeah. Ron Dane.

Speaker 1 That's what we're trying to change. Thunderbolt.
Exactly.

Speaker 1 That's why why I got to talk about the

Speaker 1 brain. I like Ron Dane.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 Ron Dane still lives in Madison. Still, I think gets drunk all the time.

Speaker 1 Hangs out in his varsity jacket. It's a pretty sweet gig, right?

Speaker 1 If you're a legend in your college town, that's a good college town too.

Speaker 1 You just graduated college. Congrats on that.
Thank you. Thank you.
You didn't go to any classes in the last year. Did you?

Speaker 3 Yeah, what we had to do online classes and we.

Speaker 1 So, so, so talk me through the online classes. Talk me through the we doing online classes.

Speaker 3 You guys are clowns.

Speaker 3 You know, I had to do online classes.

Speaker 3 I had to do online classes, right?

Speaker 3 And then I, you know, we did this.

Speaker 1 Well, I have a huge team. Yeah, right, right.

Speaker 3 So then I had to put together, you know, a paper and all these

Speaker 3 organizations that I worked with. And, you know, we got it done.
Yeah, we got it done.

Speaker 1 So you had to write a paper, you had to do like a bibliography, all that stuff.

Speaker 3 MLA format, no space.

Speaker 1 space. I mean,

Speaker 3 it was tough.

Speaker 1 Yeah, so what did you major in?

Speaker 3 General Studies with the Concentration in Marketing and Management. Nice.

Speaker 1 Okay, so who's a more famous Kent State alumni? You or a gun girl?

Speaker 3 I would say Michael Keaton.

Speaker 1 Ooh,

Speaker 1 I didn't know that.

Speaker 1 Drew Carey?

Speaker 1 I did not know that either. Price is right.
Joe Walsh from the Eagles. Damn.

Speaker 3 Fucking hate the ball.

Speaker 3 James Harrison, Josh Cribs.

Speaker 1 Yeah, okay. Antonio Gates.
So are you up there?

Speaker 3 I don't know.

Speaker 1 Joe Walsh is pretty cool.

Speaker 1 Hotel California. I mean, the Eagles.
Pretty better than Patriots, some would say.

Speaker 1 It's a real lifetime. Walks right into that one.

Speaker 1 Do you have an addiction to hype videos?

Speaker 3 Love a mean hype video.

Speaker 1 You love a hype video. So what people don't know is Julian makes his own hype videos, and they're very well done, and they're before every big game.

Speaker 1 I think you're addicted to hype videos because correct me if I'm wrong, you watch your own hype videos, what, 50 times, 100 times before each game?

Speaker 3 I like to watch a good hype video.

Speaker 3 I mean, I grew up watching Rocky IV montage and like literally right before I would go out to a football practice or a night before a game and get me fired up and, you know, music, working out, and

Speaker 3 storyline in such a short amount of time.

Speaker 1 You can't go wrong. I'd like to imagine that you sit down on a Thursday night and you're the one that's editing together so far.

Speaker 1 Like using Final Cut.

Speaker 3 C ⁇

Speaker 3 and all these other things. You know, we actually use the real deal out there.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Do you, the one hype video that I noticed that was the

Speaker 1 shit, what was, oh, it was before the Super Bowl when it was the flashbacks to the Rams, Patriots, the first one. And what was that? What was the theme of that one?

Speaker 1 It was like something about time or something. Whatever you do, you're doing a good job.

Speaker 3 We appreciate it. It was tough getting in the cartoon business.
You know, we started doing cartoon hype videos.

Speaker 3 What's up?

Speaker 1 I know, I know, but I was just telling him yeah how many how many times do you watch each hype video for real probably three times three four times before the game right before no not before the game I have I have a playlist that I go through what's on that go ahead let's see yeah read us this playlist you save them you have mixtapes it's called game playlist okay

Speaker 1 you should make that public so that people can find it on I think you can do we have it

Speaker 1 don't make it public yet let the interview run so everyone will be like oh my god you won't believe five five songs you won't believe are on Julian Edelman's playlist. All for my F plus L,

Speaker 1 uh, point point.

Speaker 3 Okay, a lot of Han Zimmer. I like

Speaker 3 the soundtrack of Interstellar, so I have stay by that.

Speaker 1 That movie sucked. I loved that movie.
Okay,

Speaker 1 have you watched it a second time?

Speaker 3 I've watched it like 10 times. Yeah, it sucked the second time.

Speaker 1 Nah, it was pretty good. Well, because there's a lot of like fake deep stuff in it, I think.
Right. When that dude's sitting on the fucking

Speaker 1 big ship for like 85 years, that's hilarious. And they come back gets back, and it's been like 10 seconds, he's like, yo, I've been waiting for it.
Time is relevant. Not relevant, bro.

Speaker 3 It's third dimensional. That shit is so stupid.

Speaker 1 Okay. I got a little bookshelf scene.
Yeah. Oh, my God.
She's sitting in the dust in the bookshelf. Oh, my God.
Morse code. Morse code.

Speaker 1 Okay. All right.
What else you got?

Speaker 3 I got a Tennessee stud by Johnny Cash. Okay.
Little Three Peep by Lil Wayne.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 3 Real Friends.

Speaker 1 What's that like when Lil Wayne is out there like potentially making songs about you, though? Because the whole black and yellow thing, like he's a big sports fan.

Speaker 1 So there's a chance that Lil Wayne's sitting down actually like writing songs about Julian Edelman. That's got to be weird.

Speaker 1 I haven't heard one. Yeah.
Not yet. He hasn't done a Patriot song yet? Yeah.

Speaker 1 You know how it is.

Speaker 3 People don't like us.

Speaker 1 People don't like my son.

Speaker 3 I mean Tom Brady will get Tom will get his name in there, Gronk. Everyone else, we're just kind of...

Speaker 1 Do you like the hate? Do you like that people don't like you?

Speaker 1 I kind of do, yeah.

Speaker 3 I guess. I mean, it's when you're doing something good and people hate you and you're getting hated on, I mean, it means you're doing something right.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Is there ever like a little bit of you that's like, come on, I work really hard.
We're a very successful team. We do things the right way.
Show us a little bit of love.

Speaker 1 Like, it's nice to be liked.

Speaker 1 I can imagine in your position, it's nice to prove haters wrong. That's a good feeling.
But there's got to be like a little part of you that's like, come on, if we're doing everything the right way,

Speaker 1 a little bit of love would be all right.

Speaker 3 I mean, we get enough love from our fan base. And I mean,

Speaker 3 a lot of people respect us. They may hate us, but they respect us.
And,

Speaker 3 you know, I'm not here to change feelings. I'm here to go out and try to win football games.

Speaker 1 Is there a part of you that, like, being around Tom Brady, that you start to feel ageless?

Speaker 1 No.

Speaker 3 Because, I mean,

Speaker 3 sometimes I look at him and I say, he looks pretty young. Right.
You know,

Speaker 1 it's remarkable.

Speaker 3 I don't feel ageless.

Speaker 1 But when he's basically getting out there every year, and what is he going to be? 42 this year? 41? 42?

Speaker 3 42, maybe 43?

Speaker 1 Yeah, 43, maybe.

Speaker 1 Has there ever been a moment? Does he complain ever about being like, man, I feel old today?

Speaker 1 It's crazy. At this point, it's crazy, and it's crazy that it hasn't been talked about even more that we are now getting to the point where he's like almost mid-40s and still doing this.

Speaker 3 You know what? He's like the exact opposite. He's Mr.
positive all the time.

Speaker 3 Feel great, babe. Man, I feel good.
My arm feels great, babe. You just got to work out.
You know what I mean? Like, he's, he's all about his lifestyle, that TB12 thing.

Speaker 3 And, you know, it works for him, and

Speaker 3 that's why he's the GOAT.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 Has he gotten you on his weird diets yet?

Speaker 3 I tried it. And I mean, I was so hungry all the time because he eats like a deer.
Yeah. Nuts and berries.

Speaker 1 So weird.

Speaker 3 I need some beef, some protein.

Speaker 1 It sucks how good he is at social media, too, because he's a guy that stayed off Twitter for the longest time.

Speaker 1 and he got on and all of a sudden he like gets all the jokes immediately which makes me think that he had a burner that he was lurking for a while. Can you confirm?

Speaker 3 I cannot confirm, but it is so funny to see the 180 with him on this because I was you know 10 years ago, 11 years ago in 2009, I was like the first kid in the room with like Twitter and Instagram and stuff and I'd be on my phone and he'd be me, he'd yell at me, yo, get out of your phone, bro, and get in your playbook.

Speaker 3 And like now he gets back, I'll literally, I'll be on the internet, and he'll be liking photos that were posted 10 minutes ago.

Speaker 1 I'm like, how did that even get liked? Yeah.

Speaker 3 He's always scanning the Graham.

Speaker 1 Yeah. He's peeping the Graham.

Speaker 1 What's up with Gronk? Is he really retired?

Speaker 3 I mean,

Speaker 3 I think so. I think so.
I don't know.

Speaker 1 Yeah, that didn't sound super convincing to me.

Speaker 3 Honestly, I don't know, man. My guy's having some fun right now.
He's enjoying it. And,

Speaker 3 you know,

Speaker 3 he's taking a lot of hits.

Speaker 3 He takes a beat, and he's 6'7. Anytime he falls, that's 3.5 feet.

Speaker 1 Did you have that conversation with him before he announced his retirement at any point in the last year or two?

Speaker 1 Like, hey, man, this is starting to add up a little bit or my body doesn't feel the same way it did five years ago?

Speaker 3 You know,

Speaker 3 we never had that conversation.

Speaker 3 But,

Speaker 3 you know, you could just tell that my guy was, you know, he was feeling it a little bit here and there. And,

Speaker 3 you know,

Speaker 1 he's got banged up see he's he's he's a genius because what he did was he basically retired so that he doesn't have to listen to coach Belichick for like six months and then he can come back in November and play the stretch run in the playoffs well I'm a fan for it so I hope so you want him to come back I mean he he's a he's a he's a valuable player yeah yeah

Speaker 1 did you notice over the last like couple years that that maybe in the middle of the season football was getting less fun for him was there less of that like Gronk I'm a yellow lab puppy, and I'm friends with everybody, and I'm bouncing around all the time.

Speaker 1 Like, was he feeling it over the course of the last couple of seasons?

Speaker 3 Sometimes, I mean, when you're banged up, football is not always fun, and I could speak for myself on that.

Speaker 3 You know, and when you're dealing with things,

Speaker 3 you know, ankle, foot, this, back,

Speaker 3 you know, it's it's football is amazing when you feel great, but when you have to go out, people don't realize our practices are like mini games. Like,

Speaker 3 just the constant cutting, the revving up, and we practice outdoors, so it's in the freezing cold. Like that's not easy, especially when you get older and you've accumulated a lot of injury.

Speaker 3 So

Speaker 3 you started seeing that

Speaker 3 he didn't necessarily, you know, it was, you know, it was tougher. I mean, it gets tougher for everyone.
I mean, it's tougher for me.

Speaker 3 You know, just get out every day and rev up. And,

Speaker 3 you know.

Speaker 1 That's when the hype video comes in play.

Speaker 3 So that's when I throw out the hype video and then I get, I just get fucking fired up like a bat out of hell.

Speaker 1 What Big Cat's getting at is that you need to give us a percentage. We're in the percentage business.
So Rob Gronkowski comes back this year at some point. What are we talking about? Like 60%?

Speaker 1 40%? 70%?

Speaker 1 A percentage? Yeah. Yeah, that he will come back.

Speaker 1 You had to guess. This isn't Rob.
This is you. Yeah, just guess.
This is actually just three guys.

Speaker 1 I'll give you my guess first. I'm going to say 35% chance.
All right.

Speaker 3 What's yours?

Speaker 1 I mean, I'm going to say 69 just because it's Rob. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 3 I'd say maybe

Speaker 1 an 11% chance. Whoa.
You're doing your own number. Your own number.

Speaker 1 Oh, yeah.

Speaker 1 100%.

Speaker 1 By the way, here's a question I had. Someone wrote all my papers for me at Kenned State.
I wrote this the second you got the MVP. Are you a bad teammate for not giving Tom Brady your MVP trophy?

Speaker 1 No. He's the leader of the team.
You always talk about, you're always so effusive with your praise, saying that you wouldn't be Julian if it wasn't for Tom Brady.

Speaker 3 I mean, if he asked for it, I would give it to him. I mean, I didn't get the trophy right after.

Speaker 1 Did you get a car? No. Really?

Speaker 3 Terrible. I think this is the first year they didn't give a car.
That's shit. Yeah.
I wanted to give it to my pop.

Speaker 1 You went to Disney World?

Speaker 3 Went to Disney World. Nice.

Speaker 1 Oh, speaking of your dad,

Speaker 1 I saw your Father's Day post. Yeah.

Speaker 1 You probably were the first person in the history of Instagram who thirst trapped his father's date post.

Speaker 1 Did you do that?

Speaker 1 I mean, it was absurd.

Speaker 1 You're like, happy Father's Day to my dad wouldn't be here without him. And it's just you shirtless, flexing, catching balls, and then one brief second of your dad, like in the frame.

Speaker 1 You thirst-trapped your Father's Day post. Just trying to be a daddy.

Speaker 1 Did you know? I mean, I have a theory too, because, you know, we're friends, and I follow you on all your social media.

Speaker 1 When you start growing your beard during the season, you don't think you look as hot. So then, when you get in the offseason and you got that movie star stubble,

Speaker 1 it's selfie city for you all offseason.

Speaker 3 That's not too far from the truth.

Speaker 1 I mean, you do have like the greatest movie star stubble of all time.

Speaker 3 That beard gets lonely in that thing.

Speaker 1 The beard is a good look for football season because it's like a nice gritty look. It's like I'm here to catch up with you.
It's here for business. Exactly.

Speaker 1 And then the offseason comes by, and and you're like, oh, I'm hanging out with Mark Wahlberg. I got to trim it up a little bit.
By the way, I heard that Mark was pissed at you. Is that true?

Speaker 3 I guess he's a little mad.

Speaker 1 What happened?

Speaker 3 He wanted to be, you know, he wanted to produce my dog.

Speaker 1 And, you know, he didn't. Got some beef going.
Damn.

Speaker 3 No beef with him.

Speaker 1 He's the older bro. Okay.
We've interviewed him.

Speaker 3 No, I've seen it. Yeah.
I listen, guys.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I know you do. You do actually listen all the time because, yeah, you do.
So

Speaker 1 I have a real question for you. Deep down.

Speaker 3 So these are all been fake.

Speaker 1 They're all fake.

Speaker 1 Here's the real one. Deep down in places you don't want to talk about, because I'm always fascinated with this with professional athletes.
Win a Super Bowl. Tear your ACL.

Speaker 1 Patriots lose the Super Bowl. Come back.
Win a Super Bowl. Is there a little deep down part of you that's like, yep, that's me.
I'm the guy.

Speaker 3 I mean.

Speaker 1 You're not rooting against the Patriots. I know you'd never do that.

Speaker 1 But it's like a very, it's something that I think every inner competitor has to at least like acknowledge that there's something there where when you can't be out there helping your team, it feels different.

Speaker 3 I mean, you just

Speaker 3 feel lonely, you know, when you're not playing.

Speaker 3 You don't feel like you're a part of the team, especially when you're hurt because you're not contributing physically.

Speaker 3 You know, so

Speaker 3 it was definitely tough to watch.

Speaker 3 But I don't think by any means did I have in the back of my mind they lost this one. So let's go out and win this one, show everyone it's because I wasn't playing it, you know.
So I don't think so.

Speaker 1 But it's okay if other people say that. What do you mean? If we're to be like

Speaker 1 the legacy of this Patriots team is they're not a complete team without Julian Edelman. Julian Edelman is a straw that stirs the drink.
You're okay with us saying that.

Speaker 3 No, you know, there's a whole lot of good guys on that team.

Speaker 1 Honestly, you obviously can't fully go into this question because you are a Patriot and there's always a red dot right in the middle of your head with a sniper, right, at all times.

Speaker 1 But I do find it fascinating that you win a Super Bowl, you go out for a year, the Patriots fall short, and then you come back and you win a Super Bowl.

Speaker 1 That's got to feel at least, and you can't say it, but I'll say it for you, at least a little good being like, yeah, I'm very, very important to what's going on here.

Speaker 3 You can say that.

Speaker 1 We're all important to the team. We all need to do our jobs.

Speaker 1 Could you imagine

Speaker 1 if I took like a month paternity leave and the podcast just tanked, and then I came back, and it was like, boom, back to one, I'd be like, this is awesome.

Speaker 1 It would. It would.
It's a natural reaction. I think it's a natural human reaction.
It's a natural human reaction. Yeah, natural.
To just be like, I want to be important.

Speaker 1 I want to help the team so much that they need me. Like, I missed an interview with Alex Smith last year, and then he broke his leg.

Speaker 1 And then I was like, if I had been on that interview, he definitely would be fine. And people were like, that was the best interview that's ever been done on this show.
No one said that.

Speaker 1 But he did break his leg. That's a fact.
And I don't even remember it because you weren't on that.

Speaker 1 There you go. Boom.

Speaker 3 The ratings must have been down.

Speaker 1 They tank. They absolutely tank.

Speaker 1 A serious question about the new pass interference rules that are coming in. I don't even know them.
They're going to review everything, basically. So everything is up for review.

Speaker 1 What happened was New Orleans fans complained a lot about that one call at the end of the game against the Rams, which, by the way, I think if I'm Sean McVay, I would have much rather have lost that game, a close game, against the Saints, like put up 30 points or whatever, and then not even had to go to the Super Bowl and get my ass whooped by the Patriots.

Speaker 1 I think he would have been better off in that situation. But

Speaker 1 yeah, I think that the new pass interference rules, Belichick's going to have some weird insight into them.

Speaker 1 He's going to coach you up in a special way to take advantage because he's so good at finding out these new rule changes and slightly modifying them to get an edge.

Speaker 3 We'll do business as business is being done.

Speaker 1 This sounds like a job for Ernie. Yeah.

Speaker 3 Ernmaster. Yeah.
I mean, it could be.

Speaker 1 Anything you could tell us that Ernie gave you this year? Like one little tip that he pulled you aside and was like, hey, Jules, make sure you do this against this team.

Speaker 3 He doesn't necessarily give you tips. I ask him questions, you know, on defenses because he knows all the numbers.
Like, he legitimately has photogenic memory.

Speaker 3 So I'll be like, you know, Ernie on third down in the red area when they're down four points. Like, what do we expect this team to do? You know, and he'll rattle off this, this, this, this.

Speaker 3 And then, if you throw a player at him, be like, yo, what's this guy like? He goes,

Speaker 3 you know, he doesn't use his arms.

Speaker 3 He's just information. That's that's what he is.
And I think that's what I honestly think that's what he does for coach.

Speaker 1 So he will get the pass interface. Yeah, he's Ernie has definitely locked himself in

Speaker 1 a panic room.

Speaker 3 My guy knows he knows every rule, regulation.

Speaker 3 I mean, it's, it's pretty.

Speaker 1 He's rule guy. Yeah.

Speaker 3 Rule guy, history guy,

Speaker 3 statistic guy.

Speaker 3 He's pretty smart.

Speaker 1 Does he have any other hobbies? Does he like any other sports?

Speaker 3 I don't think so. I honestly, I don't know.

Speaker 3 I sit next to him sometimes when he brings a big-ass tomato and he just eats that for his whole meal.

Speaker 1 It's like the Kawhi Apple Band story that was made up.

Speaker 1 He just eats a full tomato.

Speaker 1 It's like the opposite of Tom Brady, too, right? Doesn't Tom Brady not eat tomatoes?

Speaker 3 I think that's on the no-no list. Yeah.

Speaker 1 So does Ernie go to every single practice, or does he only come down like once a week when he's got some?

Speaker 3 Ernie's there for everything.

Speaker 3 Ernman is, he's

Speaker 3 like a set of eyes on everything.

Speaker 3 He's Bill's right-hand man.

Speaker 1 I'm always fascinated by Patriots receivers, too, because it seems like you get, there have been a lot of receivers that have thought that they would go to the Patriots later on in their careers, maybe get that chip.

Speaker 1 You've got like Reggie Wayne was there for like a day.

Speaker 1 Ocho Sinko, obviously, was there for a full season.

Speaker 1 But you get a lot of guys that on paper should be awesome wide receivers that, for whatever reason, they just never get it when it comes to the Patriots.

Speaker 1 And obviously, like, you guys drafted who's the dude from Arizona State? Yeah,

Speaker 1 Harry. Nikhil.
Yeah. So when you get a new receiver like that, and how long does it take for you guys on the field to be like, all right, this guy's going to work or this guy's not going to work?

Speaker 3 You know, it depends on the player. You got to find your niche.

Speaker 3 You know, if

Speaker 3 you're a guy that can play a lot of positions, that can adjust on the fly,

Speaker 3 you know, that can read coverage and do all those types of things because we do so much,

Speaker 3 you know, you're going to have a better chance of succeeding in our system.

Speaker 3 If you're a guy that can only do one thing, you know, run a go ball, like, you know, it's going to be tough

Speaker 3 just because we have so many things that adjust every single play um you know and coach looks for smart

Speaker 3 tough football players that's what he says every day he wants a smart tough football player um so i'm not saying any of the other guys that you said were not or any implying any of that it's just you know sometimes it's it's hard to play here it's hard to play here um it's not like you have you know Wednesday, Thursday to kind of get warm.

Speaker 3 Like, we're practicing hard every day.

Speaker 3 And,

Speaker 3 you know, it's mentally, physically, and emotionally draining to play for the Patriots.

Speaker 1 What about Josh Gordon? Do you think he's going to come back?

Speaker 1 He's been videotaped playing with Tom Brady. Were you there? I was not there.
You were not there. So, do you think he might

Speaker 1 have a little return here?

Speaker 3 You know, I hope.

Speaker 3 I'm wishing for the best.

Speaker 3 You know, with his situation,

Speaker 3 it's different than

Speaker 3 it's a life situation, and you're

Speaker 1 pulling for that

Speaker 3 to get better.

Speaker 3 And then selfishly, I want him because he's a really good football player and he can help us.

Speaker 3 You know, I don't know anything going into it. Like,

Speaker 3 legit, like, I've asked 30 people in the organization outside of, like, do you know what's going to happen? And no one knows not one thing. So,

Speaker 3 you know, we're just kind of sitting and waiting to see

Speaker 3 what the circumstances are going to be with him because,

Speaker 3 he'd be a really good tool to have.

Speaker 1 Yeah,

Speaker 1 I did a bad job as an interviewer there because you said something interesting that I wanted to ask a follow-up for.

Speaker 1 You were talking about how it's mentally, physically draining to play for the Patriots. Do you, we've seen it with Lane Johnson, who actually that all happened on our show.

Speaker 1 Lane Johnson saying, you know, he'd rather have fun. Do you think playing for the Patriots is fun at any time, or is it just that winning is fun?

Speaker 3 I think, you know, celebrating at parades and,

Speaker 3 you know, going out and going to Disneyland and coming here to talk about, you know, championships is very fun.

Speaker 1 Right. But if you didn't have that, I guess a better way to do that.

Speaker 3 Is it always fun trying to, like, research guys

Speaker 3 and come up with questions and grind here at four in the morning

Speaker 3 for your housecoming? It's a process. I mean, of course there's shit that you don't like doing.
Okay.

Speaker 1 So to continue with that analogy, I think it would be apt to say if we did all that stuff, which we do do, and we didn't have success, we'd probably be the worst thing ever.

Speaker 1 Because you always see it when guys go to different teams, when coaches go to different teams, they try to do the patriot way, and they don't have the success. People are like, fuck this.

Speaker 1 I don't want to practice outdoors. I don't want to practice hard all the time.
You think that when people make that comment, there's something to be said for it?

Speaker 3 I think it's just

Speaker 3 with that whole, I think it's hard because, you know, a lot of coaches try to leave and be Belichick yeah I mean I don't think there's only one guy that's Bill I mean he's been in the league for 40 years he started at the Baltimore Colts like this guy has you can't just go and and try to like harp like you're Bill Belichick

Speaker 3 because he's got a respect level that everyone

Speaker 3 everyone knows about

Speaker 3 you know so I don't know I have fun we went paintballing

Speaker 3 yeah what was that like it was amazing so I mean we do fun fun activities. We had a couple field trips.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 I saw Bill shot somebody in the face, right? He shot Calvin Orange. Yeah, he did.

Speaker 3 It was pretty fun walking by and seeing Bill like crawl.

Speaker 1 Like, I swear to God,

Speaker 3 and he, I think he got hit like four times and didn't get up, and like, people are just hitting him. And, like, it was hilarious.

Speaker 1 Has he has he like lightened up even just a little bit, or is he the same guy?

Speaker 3 I think he, um,

Speaker 3 I think he's the same guy when it comes to preparation, discipline, and all that. But I mean,

Speaker 3 he's probably one of the best evolvers in the league. And

Speaker 3 yes, honestly, it has gotten softer from when I first got there. Right.

Speaker 1 You know what I mean?

Speaker 3 So, I mean, a lot of guys think it's tough, but I mean, it we used to have double days and we'd have seven, eight days of double days in a row.

Speaker 3 And, you know, with with with the type of guys that you have coming in now, I mean, it's just a different mindset and and he's adjusting to it.

Speaker 1 That's fascinating because I think everyone thinks Belichick and they think like he is set in his ways no matter what, but you're saying he's evolved even on the

Speaker 1 personal aspect of coaching and the day-to-day like interactions with people.

Speaker 3 A little bit here and there.

Speaker 3 You know,

Speaker 3 I definitely think

Speaker 3 it's evolved a little, but I also think it has to do with the type of player you're coaching. And now it's

Speaker 3 with social media. I mean, you've got a kid who's famous since high school for doing a backflip and then, you know, sense of entitlement coming here.

Speaker 3 I mean, he's still going to be a stickler when it comes to that, but like, you know, the way he approaches things, the way we learn things now, it's very compatible to the type of guys that we have coming in now.

Speaker 1 Have you guys talked about a possible work stoppage at all? Has that even come across your desk? Because I saw that they sent out a memo to some of the players.

Speaker 3 I haven't. I haven't checked my email in like four days.

Speaker 1 Yeah, it must be nice.

Speaker 1 We haven't checked our email. We, actually,

Speaker 1 we have to check. There's no way you have an email that you look at.
I do. Oh, come on.
Right here. It's at Kent State EDU.

Speaker 1 No, I don't have that. You don't have the password for that one.

Speaker 3 I've had this one since I was like 16. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Jesus. There's something in it from D.
Smith right now being like, don't spend another cent for the next year and a half. Yeah.

Speaker 1 I mean, I don't know.

Speaker 3 We'll see how that goes. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Does Belichick do the social media breaks during like film study like Cliff Kingsbury's going to do?

Speaker 3 What do you mean, social media breaks?

Speaker 1 Everyone flipped out because Cliff Kingsbury, I think they call him phone breaks, but he basically is like every 20 minutes we're taking a break so that you become more focused because you can look at your phone.

Speaker 3 No, he's still super anti Snapface and MySpace. He's got a burner on him.

Speaker 1 He knows what all that stuff is. Everything.
The fact that he intends to use it.

Speaker 3 He doesn't know how to use it, but I think it's a good idea.

Speaker 1 He's got eyes. He knows it.
He's got a cool. That'd be great if it was Ernie who was running all the burner accounts.
Yeah. That'd be amazing.

Speaker 1 Did you talk to Danny Amendola after that post that he put up? Ooh.

Speaker 1 Yeah. You're like, hey, Danny,

Speaker 1 maybe put the phone down for a little bit. He should come on our show.

Speaker 3 He should, yeah. Yeah, my guy, he's good.

Speaker 1 Yeah. He's good.
We all get caught up in our feelings sometimes, you know?

Speaker 3 Yeah.

Speaker 3 Yeah.

Speaker 3 We had a little talk.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 He's good, though. I mean, the dude's, he's a cool dude.
Yeah. Yeah.
He should do some PR 101 with us. We could fix this in two seconds.

Speaker 3 Oh, my God. When you guys were breaking that down, I was crazy.

Speaker 1 We did it it as a Monday reading.

Speaker 1 I mean, there was a lot to work through on that. He spent, I would have to imagine, like 30 minutes crafting that message.
Yeah. Yeah.

Speaker 1 He spent more time on that message than you did on your paper to graduate from Kenned State. He probably had

Speaker 1 MLA citations at his

Speaker 1 whole nine yards.

Speaker 3 MLA, double space.

Speaker 1 Yeah. All right.
I got one last question. See Geek question.
Put in promo code take. You get 10% off SeatGeek.

Speaker 1 100% showtime Friday night. So give us one thing that we should be watching for.
Like a reason we should be watching.

Speaker 1 Not just because you're Julian Edelman and you're thirst trapping with your dad and all that stuff. Thirst trapping.
I mean, you were. It was a ridiculous post.

Speaker 3 I mean...

Speaker 1 But give us one thing, like, hey, you're going to be surprised to see this. Or we get an inside look at this.

Speaker 3 I mean, you get an inside look of...

Speaker 3 a player that's going through not just an injury, you know, I was suspended for the first four games, adversity and how I had to deal with that.

Speaker 1 Do you get into that in the documentary?

Speaker 3 Yeah, we get into that. We get into that.
And

Speaker 3 me and my father didn't talk for a while because of that.

Speaker 1 Really?

Speaker 3 Oh, yeah. So

Speaker 3 there was some tough times in there. And

Speaker 3 it's just going to kind of give you that outline of what an athlete goes through just like anyone else when there's an adverse situation and how they deal with it with their family, how they deal with it with their profession, their friends, and all those types of things.

Speaker 1 I mean, it's a life story it's not just you know a sports story um about trying to improve yourself yeah it's interesting that you that you brought up like how you go through a situation like that with your friends and and your family around you because i have to imagine that if you get suspended for something and it's public and everyone's talking about it you feel the need you have to like defend yourself a little bit to a lot of people and a lot of people probably don't want to hear that sort of defense like i don't know how i would go about doing something like that.

Speaker 1 I hear some people say sometimes, why don't athletes just say, you know what, I was coming back from an injury and I was taking whatever edge I could get to get back on the field with my guys.

Speaker 1 But then again, you have to deal with blowback from people that will take that admission and be like, okay, so you're admitting it.

Speaker 1 So now this is a whole new set of circumstances that you have to deal with. It just seems like a lot of weight that would come down on you at that point.

Speaker 3 Yeah, I mean, it's tough, bro. It was a tough,

Speaker 3 it was probably the hardest time of my life

Speaker 3 just dealing with that and dealing with the,

Speaker 3 I mean, mentally, and

Speaker 3 you're thinking, am I going to be back to what I was before I got hurt?

Speaker 3 You know, and then you don't even get to have a test try, you know, the first four games. You have to come out on a Thursday night game and play against the Colts.
And,

Speaker 3 you know, it just,

Speaker 3 it's a tough situation that it was a learning experience for me.

Speaker 3 And, you know, you guys will see, you know, how I dealt with it.

Speaker 1 Did you feel added pressure when you're coming back from an injury knowing that this isn't like a situation where, oh, well, Belichick loves me. I'm good.
It's like, no,

Speaker 1 he has cut a lot of guys that he loves. You know what I mean?

Speaker 1 It has nothing to do with the feelings of the relationship. It's the field and what you can do.
100%.

Speaker 3 You know, you definitely have that naturally in your head, but how you get out of that is just through constant reps of

Speaker 3 working your craft and working harder. And that's kind of how I dealt with it.
I mean, there were some lonely, lonely days and nights. I mean, you feel very isolated and you're sitting watching

Speaker 3 your team on the TV and can't communicate with anyone. You're sitting there, you're going crazy, pulling your hair out at the same time.
Can I do it? Is it going to be all right? Is it still good?

Speaker 3 I haven't been hit like this.

Speaker 3 There's a lot of things that go through your head. And

Speaker 3 this captures it and kind of shows you the viewer on how to deal with it.

Speaker 1 When we were at your house, when you were rehabbing, you basically were just living like our lives. You were playing video games and watching Mac football.

Speaker 1 And I was like, damn, this is what it looks like. Yeah.
This kind kind of sucks.

Speaker 3 That was.

Speaker 1 It was like a Tuesday night in, I don't know, November.

Speaker 1 Yeah, November. That was like two months out.
Yeah, it was literally,

Speaker 1 we came in, you were in the middle of a Call of Duty game. And then after we did the interview, you're like, what's on TV? Oh, Toledo's playing Miami of Ohio.
Cool. I mean, pretty good life, right?

Speaker 3 We do have some good things that go on in our life when you're not playing.

Speaker 3 But yeah, I mean, you try to put a bunch of these little things in your life, like sitting on the couch, watching TV and playing video games or something like that, or listening to music to kind of like block out, you know, what your mind's really thinking about.

Speaker 3 Because, I mean,

Speaker 3 I'm, you know, I'm thinking about every situation every five seconds. You know, I mean, you're just always turning on, always, always going.
So, I mean, yeah, it's cool.

Speaker 1 Right.

Speaker 1 You don't have to make any comment about this, but I just want to say that the day that the Robert Kraft story broke, that must have been an all-time text thread day for you, just for players on the Patriots.

Speaker 1 It's probably just like a shitload of text. Emojis, and yeah, you got all sorts of stuff.
You don't have to comment on it.

Speaker 1 I just want to how many text messages did you actually get that day?

Speaker 1 Uh, we don't have to comment on it, but I think it was out of town.

Speaker 3 I was in, I was, I was in Columbia when that happened.

Speaker 1 The country,

Speaker 3 like South Carolina, no, the country.

Speaker 1 Oh, what are you doing in Columbia?

Speaker 3 Just celebrating.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Yeah.

Speaker 3 Having fun.

Speaker 1 It's a good place to celebrate. That is a good place to celebrate.
It's a good time. Yeah, no, it's a great goal.
We've always said that, yeah.

Speaker 1 Julian Edelman, thank you very much. Appreciate it.
100% Showtime Friday night.

Speaker 1 We love having you on. We're going to have to take a picture, and you're going to take off your shirt.
We're going to thirst strap a picture.

Speaker 1 Is that cool? Also, did you see? Yeah, you. Oh, all right.
If I have to, I will.

Speaker 1 We invented a new thing where you eat celebrity, where me and Big Cat ate burgers on camera and talked about burgers with a really good-looking guy with Zach Efron. We invented that.

Speaker 1 I saw that.

Speaker 3 I did get a little butthurt about that.

Speaker 1 Yeah, Jacque Efron. I mean, that's

Speaker 1 Burgerton Zach. He's pretty good looking.

Speaker 1 He's good.

Speaker 1 Sometimes you just got to chalk up an L. Yeah.
Sometimes you know what?

Speaker 3 You chalk up an L and you go back to the fucking drawing board.

Speaker 1 Knowing you, though, you probably have like a Showtime

Speaker 1 preview thing or something coming out with Zach Efron like tomorrow night. Just fuck with us.
You mean Zachie? Yeah, exactly. Exactly.

Speaker 1 Have you also been saying 100% a bunch in this interview? You said it at the end there.

Speaker 3 Well, the thing is, I say it all the time.

Speaker 1 I always, yeah, but you

Speaker 1 fuck with people.

Speaker 1 What are you talking about? You've got the under, like, I wouldn't be shocked if I went back and listened and you said 100% like 15 times.

Speaker 3 100%.

Speaker 1 All right, thanks, Jules.

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Speaker 1 Code audio at checkout. Okay, let's get to some segments.
But before we do that, Mount Rushmore season is often raring. I feel like we've been killing it with Mount Rushmore season.
Lot of debate.

Speaker 1 Yeah. This one should be.
Healthy debate. I'll say healthy debate.
Healthy debate. This one should also have healthy debate.
It is the Mount Rushmore of ways to procrastinate.

Speaker 1 So I think you're up, PFT. I think it's PFT, Hank, me.
Yeah, I think is the snake this time. I think I go first.
Okay, Mount Rushmore of Ways to Procrastinate. Okay, this was an easy one for me.

Speaker 1 This is a layup.

Speaker 1 Checking Instagram. Wait, you can't do multiple social media stuff.
No, no,

Speaker 1 I'm telling you what you do. Checking Instagram and then checking email, then checking Instagram.
Wait, that's not fair. No, wait, this isn't fair.
You got to pick one or the other. Okay, Instagram.

Speaker 1 Okay. Instagram

Speaker 1 and Instagram stories. Instagram stories are great procrastination.
Yes. You're about to just take everything.
You're going to just

Speaker 1 take Instagram, even though you're going to be able to get the whole act of taking shit forth, jerking off, doing Twitter. Well, obviously.

Speaker 1 Obviously, if you're checking Instagram stories with one hand, you're cranking it with the other. Yes, okay.
So checking Instagram stories or Instagram in general, that's a good pick.

Speaker 5 Jerk off. Okay.

Speaker 1 Okay, good job, Hank. Also pick hand.
Yeah, that's pick. Doesn't really put things off that long.
Yes. No.
Well.

Speaker 5 I mean, ways to procrastinate. Yeah.

Speaker 1 It's a way to procrastinate. Put off.

Speaker 1 You convince yourself that you need a clear mind to do the task. Exactly.
You got to get off to put off. You're like, oh, I got to walk my dog.
Need a clear mind for that.

Speaker 1 I haven't done that yet. You crank it before you.
Are you going to? I'm going to, probably. Well, I haven't yet.
All right.

Speaker 1 Walk your dog. Okay.
That's pretty good, right? You have two. Yeah, I have two.
All right, this one's another one that I think is easy.

Speaker 1 But sometimes do you ever procrastinate before you walk your dog? Yeah, of course. You just put off your dog.
It's a whole process of the whole

Speaker 1 before, during, after is all procrastination to whatever you actually have to do.

Speaker 1 The walking the dog, like, all right, well, I got to put on my shoes and I got to, you know, maybe give him a little treat and then we get the leash on. All that.

Speaker 1 You definitely put off walking the dog for a while. Yes.
All right.

Speaker 1 Checking gambling lines.

Speaker 1 Love to procrastinate by checking gambling lines because I've convinced myself, and I'm sure this is relatable to everyone who's sitting in an office right now, that the only reason you lose at gambling is that you haven't done enough research.

Speaker 1 So some of my dumbest ideas, best ideas have come when I'm procrastinating by checking gambling lines, looking for stupid trends that really don't matter, creating spreadsheets that will never work, figuring out a system, looking at message boards, whatever it may be.

Speaker 1 You can basically waste hours and hours and hours checking gambling lines, and then eventually you're just going to take the over anyway.

Speaker 1 By creating a spreadsheet, do you mean looking at a spreadsheet that somebody else has created? Oh, no, no, no.

Speaker 1 I have created spreadsheets before where I try to find like really stupid trends, but the the sample data is only like six days. I'm like, wow, this is crazy.

Speaker 1 As someone who's proficient in Excel myself, my spreadsheets just all consist of two columns, just the first one being the name of a team. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Second column just being how much they won by in a given week. But it's endless.

Speaker 1 When you're getting ready for gambling, you can procrastinate.

Speaker 1 You can go maybe look at the pitchers, look at their last five starts, look at their stuff, the scouting report, the wind report, the weather, everything that goes into

Speaker 1 night games, everything that goes into it. Maybe reading a local paper to see how the team's feeling.

Speaker 1 You can basically go down a wormhole of checking gambling lines and trying to get yourself smarter before you bet. And then eventually you're still going to lose, but you've wasted a lot of time.

Speaker 1 All right, Hank.

Speaker 5 Send an email. Usually this is procrastinating if you're doing something that involves other people, but sending an email, asking a question, hoping that they will respond later or the next day.

Speaker 1 That's a good one. That's a good one.
It's a really good one. Starting a conversation like that.

Speaker 5 Yeah, like, oh, I've been waiting for you to answer. Now I can finish.

Speaker 1 Right, right. Okay.

Speaker 5 And if it's like after hours, instead of texting them where they probably respond quickly, you email them, hoping that they're going to be.

Speaker 1 You're like, well, I can't do this.

Speaker 1 Step one hasn't been completed.

Speaker 3 I like that.

Speaker 1 Yeah, judging how quickly you're going to get a response based on various levels of communication. That's like expert skill level.
I like that, Hank. All right.
My next one is going to be cleaning up.

Speaker 1 Tidying up. So cleaning up things that maybe don't necessarily need to be cleaned up.

Speaker 5 Yes. I always think of that scene in Limitless.
The first time he takes the pill and he walks in his apartment, he's like, this can't be my apartment. And he cleans it all in like 10 seconds.
Yeah.

Speaker 5 That's what I think of when I'm.

Speaker 1 And sometimes when I have other things to clean up, things that I don't really feel like cleaning up, like that, like wipe, scrubbing the toilet, something like that.

Speaker 1 That's at the bottom tier of your chores that you want to do. I'll just find something else to clean up that's easier to clean up than the toilet.

Speaker 1 So sometimes you can even use cleaning up as a method of procrastinating for cleaning up. Yes, Yes, just a little quick tidy.
Yes, yeah. My next one is eating.

Speaker 1 So if you have like a big project or something that you need to get done that night, sometimes you just make a way too complicated recipe.

Speaker 1 Like you look in your fridge and you're like, oh, I've got ground turkey. What can I do with that? And then you just Google a recipe.

Speaker 1 Like, well, now I need to go to the store and buy scallions, indives. sardines.
I need extra virgin olive oil

Speaker 1 and feta cheese. And then I can make my meal.
Then you come back two hours later, you eat a big dinner, then you're too tired and your stomach's full and then you got to clean up.

Speaker 1 Then you got to clean up. You got to clean up.
All right. Nice callback joke, Titus.

Speaker 5 Thanks.

Speaker 5 Scrolling through all the pictures in your camera roll.

Speaker 1 Oh, okay.

Speaker 5 Like just sitting there being bored, and you'll just go through one, and then you just end up scrolling all the way back. And then once you hit the end, you're like, fuck.

Speaker 1 Yep.

Speaker 5 It's been two hours. Yep.

Speaker 1 That's a big one. That's a very good one.
That's a big one. All right.
I have my last two.

Speaker 1 Texting any of your group chats and essentially just starting a conversation that will go on forever.

Speaker 5 Yes, like just like busting someone's balls, knowing that that's just going to get everyone else.

Speaker 1 Or like throwing out a question, you know, like even like a debate question. Who's getting drunk this weekend? Yeah, something like that.
It's essentially

Speaker 1 when you actually physically were with your roommates in college being the, anyone want to go out tonight? That's essentially what it is, except it's on text version and you're procrastinating.

Speaker 1 Is there a worse feeling in the world than throwing out one of those to the group chat and getting no response back?

Speaker 1 No, it's bad, but you have to have multiple group chats so you can throw it out to a a bunch of different people and be like, oh, yeah, any plans for the weekend? Mix it up a little bit.

Speaker 1 On a Monday morning, you text that out just to burn a couple hours. That's pretty good.
All right. And then my

Speaker 1 fourth, I'm going to go with looking at apartments or houses that you'll never be able to afford.

Speaker 1 Just searching for random cities or being like, I always wondered what it would be like to own like a $10 million house in San Francisco and just looking at pictures of sick places that you never in a million years will be able to afford.

Speaker 1 That's a pretty good one. Yeah.

Speaker 1 You can also do do that with Airbnb, too, like vacation places you'll never be able to afford.

Speaker 5 My last one, I will go with just watch a bar rescue marathon.

Speaker 1 Oh,

Speaker 5 it's always on. You watch one, you got to watch like 10, and it's just, who doesn't love bar rescue? It's a timeless.

Speaker 5 There's no good time to watch it. Anytime you watch it is a good time.

Speaker 1 Mini Inception, mini Mount Rushmore of marathons to watch. Lawn Order.
Collective. Lawn Order.
Football Life. Cops.

Speaker 1 Office. SVU SVU is such a stinker because right when one episode ends, it starts and you immediately hear the dun-dun.

Speaker 1 You're like, I guess I'm sitting here for another hour.

Speaker 1 Spike ball. They keep playing that Georgia.

Speaker 1 Texas A ⁇ M. No, it's Spike Ball.
Oh, on the other hand. They keep playing the Texas A ⁇ M,

Speaker 1 Georgia. Cornhole.
Yeah, actually, like channel surfing through all the sports. The Olympic channel? Yeah.

Speaker 1 Yeah. I watched Rowing the other day.
Breakdancing? That's going to be on there now? Yep. All right.
PFT, you got your last two? I only have one left. last one? Yeah.
Shit. This was a fast one.

Speaker 1 Yeah, this was good. My last procrastination, Mount Rushmore, is waiting for the next president to take office because it wouldn't be fair to have a confirmation vote in an election year.

Speaker 1 Okay. It's just a great way of procrastinating.
Just putting something off. Just got to wait.
Old Cocaine Mitch knows it well. Okay, there we go.
So that's your last procrastination.

Speaker 1 You've been doing that for three years now? For many years. Oh, putting stuff off.
But re-upping every four years. Putting stuff off.
To then re-upping. Yeah.
Okay, that's good. What did we miss?

Speaker 1 Scrolling Twitter. I don't know why no one even said it.
Well, because you told me that I told you. Well, yeah, you can't.
Yeah, you can't buy them all. You told me not to do my tomatoes.

Speaker 1 I thought someone would take scrolling Twitter on its own. All right.
So initially, I had Instagram stories, then moving to Twitter, then going to email. Yeah, but that's not for us.

Speaker 1 Like scrolling Twitter is kind of like more,

Speaker 5 it's not something we do when we're not working. It's something we kind of do when we are working anyway.

Speaker 1 Instagram stories is not working. No.
Scrolling Twitter is definitely working.

Speaker 5 I wrote, say, make an outline and say we'll finish the rest tomorrow.

Speaker 5 So it's like you just kind of not really get into it, but you're like, okay, I've thought about how I'm going to attack it tomorrow. Or say I'll wake up really early tomorrow and finish it.

Speaker 1 How about just taking a nap? Nap is always an old-fashioned nap. Just taking a shit? Yep.
Taking a shit, taking a nap, getting a coffee. Smoke a joint.
I do a lot of times for this show.

Speaker 1 I talked about researching gambling lines. I always do for this show, putting in my bets.
So right before we record, I'm like, hold on, give me a minute. I got to put in my bets.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 And that usually takes about, that usually gives me just just 30 minutes. I'd say it all the time.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 I mean, I can't believe no one's ever called me out on it because it's like, it takes me four seconds, and then the rest is just procrastinating.

Speaker 1 You know what sucks is when you're trying to procrastinate and take a shit, but you don't actually have to shit anymore? Yeah. You feel real bad about yourself then.

Speaker 1 You're like, what am I doing with myself? Yeah, that does.

Speaker 5 You don't even shit, but you scroll Twitter and Instagram for like half an hour. Yeah, yes.
I do that at work sometimes. Like, oh, it's shit time.
That's like, maybe not, but I'm in here.

Speaker 1 Addicting games. Addicting games.com.

Speaker 5 Yeah, I wrote that Max dirt bike. Yep.
That's my game.

Speaker 1 Shout out to the guy who makes barstoolarcade.com. I've played that basketball game.
What's your highest score in the basketball game? Have you played it? 20. Oh, I've hit 25.
Wow. Yeah.

Speaker 1 I screenshotted it just in case.

Speaker 1 It was like, I did it, and I basically had that moment where I was like, all right, now what? Yeah. You've been playing this game for eight hours to me.

Speaker 1 That thing was really hard, but once you got the hang of it, you started clicking fast.

Speaker 1 I don't think I got up to 25. I got like 21, I believe.

Speaker 1 Google Earth. Going on Google Earth and just searching random countries or maybe searching like the old houses you've lived in, that's always fun.

Speaker 1 Just doing random, like, oh,

Speaker 1 I wonder what the beach looks like in Miami on Google Earth.

Speaker 1 Just Wikipediaing conspiracy theories. Yep.

Speaker 1 YouTube rabbit hole. Just go down, like,

Speaker 1 just pick a random subject and watch everything on it. I wrote down also

Speaker 1 Netflix, The Office, or Always Sunny. Because that's one of those classic shows.
You just never stop.

Speaker 1 And you can pick any moment and just press play, and then, boom, like 10 hours have gone. Parks and Rec as well on that.
And you don't have, and

Speaker 1 it's very re-watchable, so you don't have to worry about like, oh, man, I just watched this last week. Making plans for something, too.

Speaker 1 Like, planning something in advance so that you don't have to do the thing you have to do today. I got you.
Planning something else that you'll have to procrastinate.

Speaker 1 Like, hey, you guys, like, I'll sometimes text my friends and be like, hey, you want to go to a Rode Cubs game sometime this summer.

Speaker 1 And that will, like, be like three hours of looking at the schedule, throwing out dates. Oh, that doesn't work.
Eventually, we don't do it, but the act has basically burnt three hours of my day.

Speaker 1 You know what I mean?

Speaker 5 You're texting your mom back because you forgot to, and then you scroll back in your text, and you're like, oh, yeah, oh, this is a great time.

Speaker 1 Yeah, here we go. Sock mom.
A real good one is creating a video game character, like for Madden or for any other sports game. That is franchise mode.
I want to do a full season.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I used to do that all the time when I had so much other stuff that I needed to do, is making a very lifelike representation of my face on my Madden character. Dude, my best

Speaker 1 player ever, Goose Ravenscroft, relief pitcher. Fucking spent so many hours on that guy.
He was sick, too. Real sick.
He had a mullet, mustache, the goggles. Sounds awesome.

Speaker 3 Yeah, it was awesome.

Speaker 1 It burned like basically all of 2013. That was a shitty year.
Yeah, it was. I just burned that whole year.
All right, I think that's, I mean, I'm sure there'll be more that we missed.

Speaker 1 Oh, old school, old, old school, practicing your signature. Like when you were like maybe 12 and you learned cursive and just are doodling.
Oh, okay. Bonus on that.
Drawing that S. That Superman S.

Speaker 1 That cool S. Or the 3D box.
3D box was good. Or I know a lot of girls that did this one practice writing their name, but with boys' last names instead of theirs.
Yep. Yep, that's good.

Speaker 1 Jilly's giving us a nod. Jillie's nod once or twice.
Jillie knows. Jilly Manning.

Speaker 1 Pick any of them. Okay, let's go to our, let's do some segments.
So we will tweet out ways to procrastinate. Tell us the ones we've missed.

Speaker 1 Let's do some segments. Bachelor talk, bachelorette talk for guys that don't watch the Bachelorette.

Speaker 5 Garrett and Hannah went naked bungee jumping in Latvia. I've been there, no big deal.
Luke P was furious that Hannah showed her naked body to a guy who isn't her husband.

Speaker 5 Luke P is basically the only reason people watch this show now. Like, he's the only straw that stirs the drink.
So they're keeping him around, even though all the guys in the house hate him.

Speaker 5 That was my own note. Luke P told Garrett and Mike to stay in their lanes and not talk to him.
Garrett and Mike then told Luke P he needs to stay in his lane.

Speaker 5 And Hannah confronted Luke P about him trying to control her, but he still got a rose despite being the most hated guy in the house.

Speaker 1 So, yeah.

Speaker 1 You don't get into a lane off with another guy. No.
Like,

Speaker 1 if you drop a stay in your lane, you're either fighting or you better expect a lane right back from him. When is this over?

Speaker 5 I don't know. It's like

Speaker 5 six or seven guys.

Speaker 1 You saw that news story? It was like one of the guys has a girlfriend. Yep.

Speaker 1 That was such a classic news story to try to get buzz about a shitty bachelorette season. Over it.
Yeah. Over it.
Wait, they went naked bungee jumping.

Speaker 1 Why? In Lapia. Do you really need to add the nudity to that?

Speaker 1 Is bungee jumping

Speaker 5 like on the bounce back?

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 Also, just the idea of your dick just flapping in the wind.

Speaker 1 That's what I'm saying. I feel like

Speaker 5 you got to the bottom and then bounce back up, like your balls would just...

Speaker 1 I don't know. My dick would just go into my stomach because it would be scared of the bungee jump, not because it's small.

Speaker 3 Yeah.

Speaker 1 All right, that's it. I don't know.
I don't know. I feel like dick flapping in the wind, that might be the best dick moment of my life.
It's like wiping your ass. Good wipe.

Speaker 1 With the wind just going right through your butt crack. Also, I have a feeling that if you're hanging upside down, people are so not used to seeing the male body from that perspective.
True.

Speaker 1 That any dick, they don't know if a dick's big or small. That's true.
There's nothing to compare. There's no reference.
It's like, I don't know. It just looks like

Speaker 1 a gigantic fly with a big pubiscus. Luke P, though.

Speaker 1 He hangs hog. Does he? Yeah.
Big time. Oh, big time.
All right. Talking soccer.
We'll do guys and chicks after this. Talking soccer, USA won.
That was talking soccer. Fuck Spain.

Speaker 1 Women's World Cup's okay. I like it.

Speaker 1 We know. I know.
You're obsessed with it. Our girl, Rose, is like the fastest

Speaker 1 field. I like watching USA.
Yes. The other games, I can't really get into it.
So there are some teams that are tough to watch. Argentina was tough to watch.
I bet on them a lot.

Speaker 1 That was hard to deal with.

Speaker 1 France is good. That's going to be a good matchup on Friday.
You should just let the USA play every game.

Speaker 1 And I'd be into it. Just have them against the world? Yeah.
U.S. against the world? Yes.
I've I've been to that like every three days they play a new team.

Speaker 1 It's like a Mortal Kombat tournament, except it's just the U.S. Right.
And we just have to beat everyone and then we win the World Cup. Comment to that.

Speaker 1 But this is, I'm going to call it, this is the World Cup on Friday.

Speaker 1 France versus U.S. whoever wins this.
I'm not worried about that. This match.
I'm not worried about them. Not worried about the French, huh? Nope, not at all.
It's probably smart.

Speaker 1 All right, before we do, guys on chicks, PMT Sports Biz Minute. Our intern, Jake, has been crushing it.
You got to be following him. PMT Sports Biz.
Here is his minute.

Speaker 9 Good morning. this is Jake Marsh with the PMT Sports Biz Minute.
Edinburgh University released an NFL fandom report ranking all 32 teams.

Speaker 9 Up top, the Cowboys, Patriots, Eagles, Giants right behind, and dead last, the Chiefs and the Rams.

Speaker 9 So you're telling me the teams that have former PMT guests Patrick Mahomes and the duo of Jared Goff and Blake Bortles are dead last? I call baloney.

Speaker 9 Meanwhile, Wimbledon starts in just a few days and one of the biggest renovations, an $88 million roof on the number one court.

Speaker 9 So when John Isner is playing in his inevitable five set 10 hour thriller let's just hope it's on that court out west James Holzhauer is taking his talents to the felt the Jeopardy icon who made more than two million dollars on the show participated in a few World Series of poker events out in Vegas this week but don't worry his tournament finishes will not be spoiled to the public at least by me I mean who would do that finally in food news there's a brand new big-time dessert out there and oh that's all the time we have on this PMT sports biz minute mr.

Speaker 9 Kat Mr. Commenter, back to you.

Speaker 1 Okay, thanks, Jake, our reporter there. It's not your content.
It's not your content. This is not my hamstring.
It's not your content. It's not your content.

Speaker 1 Guys on chicks, Hank. Let's end it out.

Speaker 5 There's a little fun fact someone sent in. If you look at the back of your right hand, your fingers spell out Jill.

Speaker 1 Oh, my God. Is this one of those ones where you then punch someone in the face? Oh, yeah, and if it smells like strawberries, you have cancer.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 Jill. Jill.
Back of your right hand.

Speaker 5 You gotta curl it.

Speaker 1 Yeah, no, I get it. It's like, check it out.
Jill.

Speaker 1 Now you have to suspend disbelief because it's like an uppercase I, but lowercase O. So

Speaker 1 this is your sign. Woo.
We have everyone, Jill. Yeah, this is the jilli beans.
Everyone just throws that out there. Actually,

Speaker 1 that should be the emoji. Yeah.
Oh. It's just the hand.
The hand. The right hand.
Fuck yes. Okay.
Jill. Jilli beans.
Beautiful.

Speaker 5 Sup, Swamp Cat and boys. I don't know what that means.
Swamp cat. So I'm about to switch to a new birth control.
My boyfriend wants me to get the implant in my arm instead of pills.

Speaker 5 I didn't know that was a thing. He said it's way more effective and wants what's best for me and for us, not just so he can come inside me more.
Should I believe him?

Speaker 1 No, you probably shouldn't believe him overall. But if you wanted to stick to birth control, all you have to do is just tell the guy, like, it makes my boobs bigger.

Speaker 1 I don't know if that's true or not, but if you just say that, then he'll be like, oh, yeah, okay, yeah, do, yeah, do that. Yeah, do it.
Do that one. Your boobs will get huge.

Speaker 5 So I was hooking up with this guy, and he just refused to take his windbreaker off. I reached out to him months later and asked, find out why, and he said it was just because of the draft.

Speaker 5 Please tell me what he was hiding. P.S.
He turned out to be my TA the next semester just to add to the humiliation.

Speaker 1 Was it like an NFL issue thing in Nashville? No. Like it was one of the cool

Speaker 1 draft. Oh, you think that? You think it was his sweet new...

Speaker 1 I think he just had an awesome

Speaker 1 jacket that was limited edition for draft night and didn't want to take it off.

Speaker 1 Listen, ladies, I'm sure you have the same thing in your life, but if a guy finds something that works in terms of clothes he's going to hammer it forever i have one skinny sweatshirt that you probably everyone knows the black sweatshirt that i wear like every other day in the winter if you find one thing and you're like man that's good you're just gonna wear it until you get called out way too much about it and then you'll have to switch so he hadn't been called out yet he might have had poison ivy too yeah that too it's always a wonder hey hank big cat and pmt sup pmt

Speaker 1 does she mean pft a lot of people call you pmt i always enjoy that

Speaker 1 What counts as cheating?

Speaker 5 My boyfriend of three years admitted to flirting and getting other girls' contact info when he was out partying with his single friends.

Speaker 5 We broke up after a random girl was snapping him and he tried to lie about it.

Speaker 1 Was he cheating on me?

Speaker 1 I don't know. Emotionally, yes.
Yeah. I think the chase is not cheating, but if a guy is like, yeah, all I did was go out and get her number.

Speaker 1 He probably cheated. Yeah, why would he want

Speaker 1 that?

Speaker 1 It's one of those things that if it was just confined, if you could just basically have your brain think it was just confined to talking to a girl at a bar and getting their number, then it's like, okay, that's probably not cheating.

Speaker 1 But if that person does that, they've done everything else.

Speaker 1 So I had a friend back in college that was in a relationship, but he would try to make a game of it where it was like, I'm going to see how many girls I can get to want to hook up with me and then tell them that, no, I can't.

Speaker 1 Oh, no.

Speaker 1 That's like an egg. He was edging.
Yeah, he was edging the entire time. Yes.
But that's like a very dangerous ego game to play. I would say at that point, yeah,

Speaker 1 you're emotionally cheating, yeah, emotionally cheating. I don't know what that means.
Also, we just found out Reddit online. PFT went to college with Sting.

Speaker 5 Hey, this is the last one. So I need your help.

Speaker 5 My boyfriend, well, now ex-boyfriend religiously listens to your podcast, and basically, I want to get back with him.

Speaker 5 So, can you stop what you're doing right now and ask him if he wants to get back together? His name's Joe.

Speaker 1 Joe, Joe, thank you. Listen, Joe, your girl, she misses you a lot.

Speaker 1 She's got great taste taste in podcasts. Joe,

Speaker 1 this is essentially the guy doing the marriage, like the proposal.

Speaker 1 Yeah, or the marriage proposal on the Jumbotron at the game. This is the most romantic thing that could ever be done.
What's her name?

Speaker 1 Joe's girlfriend. Joe's girlfriend.
Listen, Joe. Joe's girlfriend.
Well, now they're back together. Joe, we're talking to you right now.

Speaker 1 This is going to suck for all the Joes that we're not talking to. That have a girlfriend that they miss? Oh, fuck.
Or that just got. Or think about the NFL.

Speaker 1 No, yeah the Joe that broke up with the girl the Joe that's girlfriend broke up with him and he's been heartbroken and now he's like oh shit she wants to get back

Speaker 1 Joe listen she wants you back not you Joe Joe not that Joe just text her loved your message on PMT and see and then tweet us and then all you Joes out there text your text your ex-girlfriend being like thank you for getting the shout out on PMT let's get back together and just tweet us how that goes that will definitely work also female listeners, don't have sex with any guy named Joe because he's getting back together with his ex-girlfriend.

Speaker 1 So, until you do get back with your ex-Joe, none of the other Joes are getting laid. This is a dumpster fire.
I'm excited. Yeah.
It's like that movie Chirac, except for Joe's. Yeah,

Speaker 1 we need a hashtag for Joe so he can reach out to us tomorrow.

Speaker 5 Joe knows.

Speaker 1 Joe knows. Hashtag J-O-E knows,

Speaker 1 and then put the text message that you texted to your ex-girlfriend being like, you know what? I do miss you. Let's get back together.

Speaker 1 Love you guys.