Ryan Whitney, Randy Moss, Kentucky Derby Picks, GoT Predictions

Speaker 1 Hey, pardon my take listeners. You can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube.
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Speaker 1 On today's part in my take, we have recurring guest Friday, Ryan Whitney, to talk about the NHL playoffs and the original Randy Moss, aka

Speaker 1 the white Randy Moss, aka

Speaker 1 the Oaks Master. He calls in to tell us his picks for Kentucky Derby on Saturday and the Oaks on Friday.
I like that. The Oaks Master General.
The Oaks Master General.

Speaker 1 We also have a lot of other stuff, tons of segments, a little MP Arden My Take, FAQs, Fire Fest of the Week, and some Game of Thrones preview packed Friday show for you.

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Speaker 1 Okay, let's go.

Speaker 1 Now in the street, there is violence,

Speaker 1 and then a lot of some work to be done.

Speaker 1 No place to hang a low washing,

Speaker 1 and then I can't pay all on the sun. Oh no, we're gonna rock it down to Electric Avenue,

Speaker 1 and then we'll take it higher.

Speaker 1 Oh, we're gonna rock it down to Elaine, Trake Irving.

Speaker 1 Welcome to part of my take presented by the Cash App. Go download it right now.
Use code Barstool. You get $5 and you have $5 to the ASPCA saving animal lives.

Speaker 1 Today is Friday, May 3rd, and it is the final show in this god-awful studio in headquarters 1.0 in New York City. We are moving, folks.
We are moving. You are listening to us right now.

Speaker 1 We've already moved. If you see this, we're gone.
We didn't get the tax incentives that we wanted from the city, so they're building us a new stadium about two blocks away.

Speaker 1 Excited to get in there. This studio does have a lot of memories, though.
Well, a lot of shitty memories. Embrace the bait.

Speaker 1 Yeah, we were prepping for the show, and PFT had a great idea. It was a very good idea.
Like, hey, let's do favorite memories from the studio. And

Speaker 1 we all just kind of sat there.

Speaker 1 And honestly, the time John Cena tried to fuck my belly button. Yeah, that was a good one.
I almost burned the place down. I forget what I was even lighting on fire.
That t-shirt? Oh, yeah.

Speaker 1 Hank's t-shirt. I was lighting Hank's face.

Speaker 1 That's right. I was mad at Hank because Hank pissed me off.
Yep. And I lit his shirt on fire and almost burned the place down.

Speaker 2 Michael Jordan call.

Speaker 1 Michael Jordan call, we kind of decorated the place, but not really. Like, shit just fell down all the time.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 It looked like someone just took a big bite out of the walls.

Speaker 1 The Dungeons and Dragons gold episode. That was pretty cool.
So now we're just doing memories that happened last month. I like it.
Yeah. Because I also can't remember anything past like early March.

Speaker 1 Barcelongold.com slash PMT. Yes, Dalton.
We've got a really good interview coming next week. Yes, we're good.
Really good.

Speaker 1 Let's see. What else do we do in this studio? Von Miller, when he FaceTimed his dad and said, hey, dad, don't we kiss on the lips? Yep.
And his dad was like, you shut the fuck up now, son. Yep.

Speaker 1 So that was a great one. That was a great one.

Speaker 1 All good memories. Can't remember any of them.
And we're going to a new studio where we're going to make great memories.

Speaker 1 There's been a lot of debate about the new studio. PFT and I want to put in a bench press.
We've had a lot of really bad ideas for the new studio that we've just like tossed out there.

Speaker 1 I said at one point that I wanted like a field turf. Astro turf in the studio.
Field turf. And we were like, hold on a second.
That's funny for a week and then it's going to get disgusting.

Speaker 1 And you spill stuff and it's not coming out.

Speaker 1 It would have smelled so better of that. But I'm very excited for this new studio.
My only concern with it is... It might be too nice for us.
We might have to junk it up a little bit.

Speaker 1 That's why we got to get the bench press. Little prison yards.
Hank is still shaking his head at the bench press. Bench press, two cans.
Sorry, we want to get jacked. Sorry.

Speaker 1 Hey, Hank, we would like to do this show forever, but we can't if we're out of shape. That's true.
That's true. You never hear of an out-of-shape podcaster.
Yeah, you never hear of a.

Speaker 1 No, I need to live for. Listen, the Clintons just gotten the podcast game, dude.
Yeah. Yeah.
Now I have your attention. I thought you guys were joking.

Speaker 7 It's one of those things where it's like, oh, you guys go back and forth. Like, oh, what if we got a bench press? Like, oh, what if we got a dunk tank?

Speaker 1 That's all.

Speaker 1 The dunk tank is really like wait wait the dunk tank wasn't it was more of a soggy sorrows and the dunk tank it was a hybrid it was

Speaker 1 i would if we had a dunk tank i'll pour water on my face right now if you'd give me permission to get a dunk tank i've technically given pft credit for soggy sorrows i said that on the air i said you get credit for this that's big of you yeah so he has done soggy sorrows hank anyway i just think that we should you know get get microphones in there make sure everything can record properly and then maybe add a few things after once we're inside but you guys being like oh let's get a bench press

Speaker 7 dunk tank Listen, Hank. Let's get, I think, I think PFT at one point said, let's build an aquarium around the entire studio so Larry can, you know,

Speaker 1 swim freely. Never said that.
See, it's good because PFT always has these wild ideas. I just slide in with like a

Speaker 1 not as wild idea, but it's like in comparison when PFT is like, hey, we should get a huge aquarium. I'm like, what about a bench press?

Speaker 1 I also wanted, I want to get those tubes that they have in banks. Yeah, that way.
So then I can write a message and put it in and send it over to Hank in the middle of a show.

Speaker 1 A lot of PFT's ideas are like the sound is going to be bad and we're a podcast. Yeah, whatever.
We're also going to have a mic for Bubba. He's going to be able to talk.
It's cool.

Speaker 1 Huge. But yeah, no, the bench press is happening because being able to ask every guest, what do you bench and then have them be like, I don't know,

Speaker 1 200? Prove it. We should also get just a sound isolated room, like a plexiglass room to put Howie Mandel in whenever he comes in for another interview so we can't give him germs.

Speaker 1 Oh, we should do that. But remember that game show where the dollar bills just flew everywhere in like the tornado room? Yeah.
What was that game?

Speaker 1 I forget the game that you're talking about, but I think it's just called like the

Speaker 1 cash tunnel. Yeah.
So cash apps should create that. Do they just give, yeah, we just put cash and we let them go in there and the joke is we lock it and we don't let them out.

Speaker 1 Yeah, or we just put them in there with just a bunch of cocaine on the ground and then we turn it on and then they're forced to inhale the cocaine. And we take a picture and we take it.

Speaker 1 And you have to come on forever. Now we can blackmail you.
Yeah, you truly are a recurring guest.

Speaker 1 You're a recurring guest, and you also pay us. I like that.
Win blackmail room. Yeah.
There should be a blackmail room. Listen, this is what we have.

Speaker 1 We have a blank canvas. The new studio is going to be awesome.
The bench press is going to be sick.

Speaker 1 We have a new video idea that's coming out. I know that everyone asks, or not everyone, but some people ask about exit interviews.

Speaker 1 Well, turns out exit interviews are a little tough sometimes to get a guest we've never met before to go into a creepy bathroom.

Speaker 1 But with our new studio, we have something even better that's less creepy. A shower.
A shower. That we're going to have them.
We're going to watch them shower. And it's going to be great.

Speaker 1 Study their shower just. But yeah, there's going to be new stuff coming.
It's going to be awesome. We're excited.

Speaker 1 So long to the old studio that wasn't that great because we can't think of any memories. Yeah.
I mean, we can think of some. Oh, remember that time we went goofy-footed and we sat on different sides?

Speaker 1 Yeah, that's weird. That was fucked up.

Speaker 1 Never do that again.

Speaker 1 Just on our anniversary. Yeah, Hank.
Anything else?

Speaker 7 When we did the whatchamacallits before the show, that was fun.

Speaker 1 The spelling salts. We need to get more.
Well, we need to get the spelling salts for the bench press. That's true.
And, yeah. I mean, that's...

Speaker 1 You're being out-voted. Who's the last time we benched?

Speaker 1 Exactly, Hank. Exactly.

Speaker 1 I don't bench anybody.

Speaker 7 You have a gym in your building.

Speaker 1 There's not a bar. There's not a bench press bar.
When's the last time you benched, Hank? At the Combine a couple years ago? Yeah, and we watched. Yeah.
Not great enough. Not pretty.

Speaker 1 You more than anybody should want to bench press.

Speaker 7 You're all skin and bone. It's just not in the studio.

Speaker 1 We'll have you doing squats on it, too. That way you can get an ass.
Bro, hey.

Speaker 1 you don't have an ass.

Speaker 1 I actually wrote that down for New Year's Resolution 2020. Get an ass? Get an ass.
Okay. Get a little dunk.

Speaker 7 A little junk in the trunk. You don't got to worry about that.

Speaker 1 Oh, wow. I'm going to see Hank.
Now I'm cornered.

Speaker 1 You know what, Hank? We just upgraded to a Poflex and a Peloton. It's funny.
We saw the first

Speaker 1 desks being installed today, and Hank's desk is way bigger than ours. Yeah.
Hank is.

Speaker 1 I don't know what happened. He's got a throne in there.
Yeah, I don't know what happened. It's weird.

Speaker 1 Oh, the iron Throne? Weird. I didn't ask for that.

Speaker 1 And it massages you? Yeah, shit.

Speaker 1 Order the wrong thing. So, Sunday night,

Speaker 1 we will be in our new office. It's not going to be complete, even close to complete, but we will be there and look for some new stuff coming out of there.

Speaker 7 We got to talk about it. Also, this has never really got Tarsbill, but Bubba just sits on a radiator every day.

Speaker 1 Yeah, it's very,

Speaker 1 very bad for him. Yeah, we're going to get it all set up.
It's going to be nice. We're going to be a real podcaster once, but we have to add things to make it a terrible

Speaker 1 thing. It can't be too nice.
If it's too nice, if it's like Dan Patrick's place, which is awesome for us,

Speaker 1 also shout out Dan Patrick. You said some stuff about

Speaker 1 we're all rooting for him. But if it's really super nice like that, that doesn't fit us.
No. We need a little bit of shit to really fit in.
Even maybe literal shit. Yeah, literal shit.

Speaker 1 Like some animals nesting. Well, if we had done the astro turf, we could have had our dogs poop on it.
That's true.

Speaker 1 I think we should build in dog crates, too. Big miss.

Speaker 1 Okay, before we get to Firefest, we need to do a little cleanup on the NBA playoffs. We're going to get to talk about hockey playoffs with Ryan Whitney.

Speaker 1 So, first up on the list of things we need to talk about, we killed the Nuggets. Sorry.
Whoops. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Weren't great. They made a little comeback in the fourth quarter, but put a couple nickels on them.
Yeah, but they lost. They didn't end up so well.
They split, and the Trailblazers, I would contend.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I'm going to say it. They probably have the best home court advantage in the playoffs.
Maybe the Warriors. Wow.

Speaker 1 Saltings.

Speaker 1 Not really Sports Town. I'm talking about like...
Toronto Drake? No. Toronto.
Toronto has the classic, if things start going bad, it gets ugly.

Speaker 1 I'm concerned for everybody that was at the Billboard Awards last night, just in Drake's presence.

Speaker 1 He might have cursed Imagine Dragons,

Speaker 1 which in turn curses everybody. We're going to get to the Game of Thrones stuff, but if Arya Stark somehow dies in the next episode, an episode that was taped a year ago,

Speaker 1 then

Speaker 1 I'm no longer just joking about the Drake curse. Like,

Speaker 1 it's gone beyond. You know what I mean? Like, it's actually something that he should be locked up for.
Yeah. Agreed.
I think, yeah, just in general. Yeah.
Just locked up.

Speaker 1 But yeah, the Nuggets, going back to that,

Speaker 1 their fans kind of took the mantle from the Utah Jazz fans last night. There was one dude that was screaming at Cantor.
Did you see that? Telling him, go back to Turkey.

Speaker 1 Oh, wait, you're not allowed to go back. Yeah.

Speaker 1 A little execution humor there.

Speaker 1 It's funny.

Speaker 1 You're not allowed home because it'd kill you. But it's one of those things where it's like probably one guy that said that.
But now it's the rules. We've started a narrative now.
Yes.

Speaker 1 So Denver, your head got a little too big with all the gassing up that we did for you. C-Rad.
Sea Rad. Actually, I still, listen, I still like you guys.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I hope the series goes back to Denver at least for a couple games. Well, it definitely will.

Speaker 2 Yeah.

Speaker 1 At least for a couple of years. Oh, for a couple.
Oh, nice. Okay.
For at least a couple.

Speaker 1 I love Denver, but

Speaker 1 I've already stated that I'm rooting for our friend C.J. McCollum.
We're easy.

Speaker 1 If anyone from the Nuggets wants to come on the show, I will absolutely root for them next year. Yeah.
So we're going to hold them hostage for that. We also have D'Angelo Russell,

Speaker 1 Brooklyn Net legend, had a great year.

Speaker 1 Really, really dumb because he got caught with weed in an airport, which I actually didn't think could happen anymore. No.

Speaker 1 And it was because he hid it in an Arizona Ice-T false bottom thing that you probably bought when you were 17, being like, this is awesome. I can hide my drugs from my parents.

Speaker 1 Yeah, so a couple things about that. Number one, you're right.
It's very hard to get caught with weed when you fly anywhere. I'm pretty sure it's legal to fly with weed.
They just don't care.

Speaker 1 Yeah, right. If they catch you going through like the carry-on security and they find like a little bit of weed, they're going to look the other way because they've got bigger fish to fry.

Speaker 1 It's like a chill law that everyone knows. Like, if you don't make a big deal out of it, they won't make a big deal out of it.
Right.

Speaker 1 So, number two, putting it inside the largest container of liquid that you could possibly find is the dumbest possible idea because, okay, the rule is three ounces are below. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Anytime you, the security is so bad in airports when it comes to finding drugs, but they are really, really good at finding a 16-ounce soda.

Speaker 1 And every single time I go through there with a soda, I get caught. So I don't even think there's liquid in these false bottom things, but there might have been.

Speaker 1 And then on top of that, even if there isn't, it's just a big cylinder of metal that will show up in a metal detector. Yeah.
And they'll be like, what's going on here?

Speaker 1 That's a can with no liquid in it, but it's sealed.

Speaker 2 Yeah.

Speaker 1 Huh. Interesting.
Yeah. Is that better or worse than when Ontario Smith got caught with a fake penis, the Wizenator, that he was using to get around a drug test? The Wizonator's all the time.

Speaker 1 Great name. Yeah.

Speaker 1 The other thing I want to throw out there, D'Angelo Russell, like, this is one of those arrests that clearly doesn't matter because it's a little bit of weed and no one gives a fuck. Right.

Speaker 1 But it's more the stupidity is like way worse than the crime. That's how Michael Vick got caught too, right?

Speaker 1 Like him and his buddies were going through an airport and they had a sprite bottle that had a false bottom to it. Yes.
So the other part that I can't understand,

Speaker 1 he was going from New York to Louisville, Kentucky, which you're like, okay, he's going to probably the Kentucky Derby, whatever. He's from Louisville.
Doesn't have a hookup.

Speaker 1 He can't fucking find weed. Question is, is he a nerd? Does he not have friends? I don't understand this whatsoever.
You're a millionaire athlete. It's weed.

Speaker 1 Either have a friend bring it with you on the flight, and he's your fall guy, Chris Carter, or get it when you go home, or just put it in your bag and don't put it in a false bottom metal cylinder that they're looking for.

Speaker 1 Right, just honestly, just put it in your pocket. I'd cut him.

Speaker 1 Okay, cold tape. I'd cut him.
Can't trust the decision maker. Yeah.

Speaker 7 Well, he already had that controversy where he was snitching on his teammates.

Speaker 1 This is somehow dumber because that one was like kind of funny.

Speaker 1 Prank gone too far. Guy talk gone too far.
That was actually the last we heard of Iggy Azalea. Yeah.

Speaker 1 The other thing I wanted to quickly note: we have two more stories from the NBA. Thoughts and prayers to Danny Ainge.
He suffered a heart attack in Milwaukee. Mild heart attack? Mild, mild.

Speaker 1 So he's okay. Probably cheese curds.

Speaker 1 Listen, if there's a place you're going to have a heart attack, do it in Wisconsin because they know how to deal with it. Hank was wondering if this makes the Celtics a team of Destiny.

Speaker 1 I thought that was too soon to ask the question. No, I don't think so.
Mild is mild heart attack.

Speaker 7 I didn't ask that because John Havichuk dying already makes a Celtics a team of destiny.

Speaker 1 Good. Good.
He probably got a heart transplant from Dan Gilbert and only gave up a lock of hair and a stool sample for a new heart.

Speaker 1 I actually think that Danny Ainge then trumps John Havichuk and it was mild, so

Speaker 1 that's tough.

Speaker 1 Yeah, now everyone's going to talk about Danny Ainge. Nobody's fine.

Speaker 7 He was in the hospital. It's a story.

Speaker 1 He's fine, but it was a headline, so it's like no team destroyed. So here's the thing.

Speaker 1 If you're Danny Ainge and you're not allowed to watch the Celtics games, like in Major League when the manager had that heart attack,

Speaker 1 do you sneak a TV in? Do you watch him? Obviously. How much do you blame Jason Tatum not just going to the rim with the ball on Danny Ainge's heart attack?

Speaker 7 0%.

Speaker 7 Okay.

Speaker 1 What about LeBron? Can we figure out a way to blame this on LeBron?

Speaker 7 That we can probably do because he's probably trying to get Anthony Davis. And there's probably like the only thing holding it up is LeBron, Rich Paul.

Speaker 1 There you go. Okay.

Speaker 7 There could be some ties there.

Speaker 1 There we go. All right.
So, no, seriously, thoughts and prayers of Danny Ainge. Hope he gets better.
The last thing I wanted to bring up before we do Fire Fest: there's a new debate in town, boys.

Speaker 1 Oh, it is. People are saying.
I'm not saying.

Speaker 1 People are saying,

Speaker 1 should the debate be Kevin Durant versus Michael Jordan?

Speaker 1 People are saying that. As in, skip Bayless.

Speaker 1 I didn't say, don't say names. As in, people are saying, and guess what? I kind of agree.

Speaker 1 If he wore number 23, the debate would have already happened. That was the only reason we weren't even including KD in the discussion a couple years ago.

Speaker 1 So it was harder to get there. So I say yes.
It's a legitimate question. PFT, let me ask you a question.
On top of that question, if the Warriors win this year,

Speaker 1 what is Kevin Durant's finals record? I don't know. 3-1.
Okay. Hmm.

Speaker 1 And what would LeBron James be? 3-6? 3-6. So he's got the same amount of rings.

Speaker 1 It feels like 3-1 better than 3-6. We could go all day, folks.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 We could cherry-pick all day.

Speaker 7 If they win this year and he wins one other championship somewhere else, that's a real conversation.

Speaker 1 If he wins this year with another finals MVP and then wins another one somewhere else with another finals MVP, four finals MVPs and a four-one record in the finals would be pretty damn impressive.

Speaker 1 That would be very, very impressive. And LeBron never goes back to the playoffs.
It would be tough to overlook. It would be tough to overlook.

Speaker 1 We're having the debate right now.

Speaker 1 But now what if KD goes to the Lakers and then him and LeBron team up and win two more rings?

Speaker 7 If he gets MVP.

Speaker 1 Oh, okay. Yeah.
Yeah. Whose man's?

Speaker 1 League MVP or are we talking finals MVP? Finals. Because I can see LeBron pulling in the league one and then KD coming over the top with

Speaker 1 LeBron's best years are behind him. Okay.
All right. Oh, by the way, stay woke.
Did you see that Kevin Durant's rumored to the Nets now?

Speaker 1 Maybe D'Angelo Russell did that on purpose, so people are like, You're such an idiot. It really is Kevin Durant's team.
Kind of tarnished the star on the team, the current star on the team.

Speaker 1 Being like, we need an alpha. Yeah, we need an alpha.
These guys can't even get weed through the airport. Uh-huh.

Speaker 1 KD in a New York market would be so awesome.

Speaker 7 Yeah, it would.

Speaker 1 Yeah, it would. He would probably be our best friend.
No joke. Like, I'm not even saying this

Speaker 1 because I want him on the show, which I do, but like, Kevin Durant definitely wants to be our best friend and will probably say no. Verbal meme,

Speaker 1 it's the Players' Tribune cover, and Kevin Durant is wearing a Pard of My Take t-shirt, and it says my next chapter.

Speaker 1 Yeah, Ravel and Durant are going to do like a business lunch once a week, being like, why won't the Pardon My Take Boys talk to us? Here's what we do. We just say we're developing a new app.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 And that we want KD to be an early investor in it.

Speaker 1 And the PMT app. Yeah.
What does it do? Well, guess what it does, Kevin? It's disrupting the game. Yes.
It's just disruption. BBB app.
Yep. We're not going to tell you what it means.

Speaker 1 And then it'll be the face of it. I like it.

Speaker 1 Okay, Firefest of the Week. Hank.

Speaker 7 My girlfriend got a new dresser, and I had to put it together, but they don't give you screws that you can use a normal screwdriver for. You have to use, you know, those little L things.

Speaker 1 The Allen Rich. Yeah, the little, yeah.
Would you get Ikea?

Speaker 7 Wayfair, but I couldn't, so it didn't turn, and I just had to literally turn it once, take it out, put it back in, turn it twice.

Speaker 1 So instead of like doing it-you had it in the wrong place.

Speaker 7 No, it was like there was no, there was no room to spin.

Speaker 1 Oh, okay, I got you.

Speaker 7 So I had to spend like an hour instead of just like twist, twist, twist, twist, twist. It was just like painstakingly going one, out, one.

Speaker 1 You were so frustrated.

Speaker 7 It wasn't even frustrated. It was just like it took me like an hour and a half to do something that should have taken me like 20 minutes.

Speaker 1 If your hand strength was a little bit better.

Speaker 7 No, it had nothing to do with the...

Speaker 1 The physics forbade it. Did your hands cramp at any point? No.

Speaker 1 That's a lie. It's a lie because it's an hour and a half.
You know what you need? You need a bench press and a bucket of rice. Yeah.
Strengthen up those forearms.

Speaker 1 We should actually get a bucket of rice right there, though. We were talking about that.
Yeah. Yeah, so we can get our hands right.
Hit the rice bucket, pal.

Speaker 2 Mm-hmm.

Speaker 7 That, and then obviously, I feel like everyone's going to be dealing with our pile and moving has been a personal fire for us. But not as bad as that.

Speaker 1 I don't think it was as bad. It was a time capsule.
The lower you went, the older shit you found. It was great.

Speaker 1 I also, I don't want to say that I'm reformed because there's a chance I start another pile at the new office, but this was a wake-up call that I truly am a hoarder.

Speaker 1 Like, I really, there was a lot of stuff that was like, I would never in a million years wear this. Why do I own it? Yeah, I'm very reformed.
I can tell you right now, I'm starting a new one.

Speaker 1 You wanted to bring the tire to the office.

Speaker 1 Hank, first of all, it's not a tire. It's a trophy.
It's a low man award.

Speaker 1 We can't just replace the tire with a new one. What do you think? The tire grows on the tree.
We just get the first one. From the tire store.
What do you mean? But we can't replace it.

Speaker 1 But that's the trophy. It would be illegitimate if we just tried to smuggle in a new trophy and act like it was the same one from year one.
There are multiple Stanley Cups. Are there? Yeah.

Speaker 1 Well, that's not cool.

Speaker 1 I'm pretty sure there's a show one, and then there's one that sits in Toronto or wherever the fuck it is. Definitely not Toronto, right? No, I think

Speaker 1 wherever the Hockey Hall of Fame is. Okay.
It's kind of ironic, actually. Yeah, it's very ironic.

Speaker 1 All right, what do you got, PFT? My Fire Fest of the Week is the Buffalo Bills tailgate lot.

Speaker 1 So they are now starting to charge upwards of $600 plus dollars per bus that drives in for the privilege of tailgating there in order to curb some of the behavior that's been spreading like wildfire across various social media platforms and blogs, which will remain unnamed.

Speaker 1 So they're a little upset about the image they're getting up in Buffalo. So now they're going to try charging like $600 per bus and setting up like a little tailgate village.

Speaker 1 But the problem is, inside this tailgate village, they're giving you a table to use to tailgate. So what do you think is going to happen? They're just throwing fuel on the fires.

Speaker 1 They're like, hey, we don't want people jumping through tables. Here's a table.
Right.

Speaker 1 Wait, so is there private lots, though, right? So we're okay for a little bit of it. I'm not sure how that works anymore because they're trying to crack down on like all the table jumping now.

Speaker 1 The best was when we went to Bill's Mafia two years ago, and we pulled up in the Barstool RV, and we were like, the cops came and like, you guys can't park here. You're going to incite a riot.

Speaker 1 We're like, we're not doing anything. And as they were saying that, a guy had climbed on top of the RV and jumped through a table from the top of our RV.
Yeah, it was pretty great. Fuck.

Speaker 1 But here's the thing. If you pay $600 to get into this tailgate lot, it's like an all-you-can-eat buffet.
You're going to want to make sure you get your money's worth.

Speaker 1 You're going to smash more tables. Yeah, you absolutely.
You'll start more fires. Yeah, also, they're excluding the poorer people.

Speaker 1 I guess that's probably a good thing if you think about the different STDs that you get in a Bill's tailgate, whether it's for butthole eating or Kiko Alonso jersey trading.

Speaker 1 So now they're making sure that only people that are able to pay for their Valtrex prescription can get in. Okay, that's fair.
Although we don't pay

Speaker 1 shame in 2008-19. I'm saying the Bills...

Speaker 1 Put that rose petal right up in your Twitter avatar, bro. I'm saying the Bills are being very, very careful in terms of they're protecting their poor customers.
Yes, yes.

Speaker 1 All right, my personal Fire Fest of the week, I got cable shamed. I guess having cable is shameful these days because I tweeted that I had cable.
People were really mean to me.

Speaker 1 All these millennials running around that are cord cutting made me feel really bad that I have cable. I don't get it.
Why? Because they said that, oh, you're, well, they're like, you're poor.

Speaker 1 It was a mix of you're so you're like sick brag that you're rich because I pay for cable, which I don't get. And then also a, you're such a loser because you still pay for cable.

Speaker 1 It's like basically free on the internet. Is that true? I don't know.
Is TV free on the internet? Bubba, do you have cable? No. Bubba doesn't have cable.
Do you have cable, Hank?

Speaker 1 Yeah, Hank, you have cable.

Speaker 1 Stay strong, Hank.

Speaker 7 I didn't have cable, though, when I moved here. I didn't have cable for 18 months.

Speaker 1 It was terrible. But explain it to me.

Speaker 1 Why am I being shamed?

Speaker 7 Have you heard of cord cutting?

Speaker 1 Yes, but have you heard of buffering and things being 15 seconds behind?

Speaker 7 Yes, but it's like, you know, the people, your audience that you're speaking to on Twitter, if they're all cord cutters, they're not going to identify with your cable view.

Speaker 1 But how do you watch...

Speaker 7 I would say that most of the listeners are probably cable people.

Speaker 1 Okay, exactly. Well, it was, it was, you know what?

Speaker 7 I feel like Twitter, if you're active on Twitter and cord cutting, those two things go hand in hand.

Speaker 1 Dude, it hurt my feelings. That's all I'm going to say.
I've been watching cable and paying for a cable bill for

Speaker 1 15 years now. Once you do anything for 15 years, you don't just stop doing it.
Right. You're just going to keep doing it until you die.

Speaker 1 Dude, I have so many boxes and I buy like whatever boxing UFC pay-per-view. I'm such a fucking noob that I buy that stuff still.
Yeah. And I mean, my cable bill is like.
probably 400 bucks a month.

Speaker 1 I don't even. I don't.
What? What are you supposed to do? You got to watch. Yeah, exactly.

Speaker 1 I'm going to be 90 90 years old, and the only things on cable are going to be QVC, and then just like commercials for porn channels that I don't subscribe to, and I'm still going to be paying $200 a month for it.

Speaker 1 I have a buddy who cord cut it, and I watched a bowl game with him two years ago, USC versus Ohio State, maybe last year, whenever it was. It buffered so many fucking times.

Speaker 1 I had money on the game, and I was sitting there like, what is happening right now? I could never cord cut. How do you change the channel? How do you do anything? I don't get it.

Speaker 1 Nobody knows the the answer. All you people that were mean to me saying either that I'm old or that I'm it's a sick flex.
I don't know. Just please leave me alone.
I want my cable.

Speaker 1 I want to be left alone. You know what? Some people like commercials.
Yeah. Okay.
It gives you a chance to get up and go to the bathroom. And also to look at Twitter.

Speaker 7 There you go. To material for your podcast.

Speaker 1 To look at Twitter and have people yell at you for having cable.

Speaker 1 What do you have?

Speaker 7 Five commercial podcasts.

Speaker 1 Oh, yeah.

Speaker 7 It's in development.

Speaker 1 Dude, how about that vacuum cleaner I found the other day? That was crazy. 32 pool balls.

Speaker 1 I don't know. If you're listening right now and you're like, hey, I have a vacuum cleaner, ask yourself this.

Speaker 1 If you dropped all 32 of your pool balls in your living room, because you clearly have a pool table and you have way too many racks of balls, would your vacuum cleaner be able to pick it up?

Speaker 1 I guarantee you that vacuum cleaner could clean up our field turf. Yep.
Oh, that's a good point. Hey, good point.
Field turf is looking mighty good now. Good point.
Okay, let's get to some interviews.

Speaker 1 First up, we're going to do Ryan Whitney and some hockey talk.

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Speaker 1 And now, our friend, Ryan Whitney.

Speaker 1 Okay, we now welcome on our good friend, Ryan Whitney. It is NHL Playoffs.
We're deep into it.

Speaker 1 We're taping this on Thursday afternoon, so we don't know what obviously happened Thursday night games, but we want to kind of refresh everyone on what's going on.

Speaker 1 I want to start with the Brad Marchon little rabbit punch, and I want you to first explain what you thought was the just result of that. He didn't get suspended.

Speaker 1 And second, explain to us, the people who might not watch hockey all the time, the role of a pest and what possibly could happen as retribution to Brad Marchawn.

Speaker 2 So I was going to puke if he got suspended. That is not a suspension.
Stanley Cup playoffs, a little punch in the back of the head while the guy's on his knees.

Speaker 2 While being an enormous rat move and a scumbag move, it was not a suspension. Not suspension worthy.
You can't be suspending guys for that. I was shocked he didn't get fined.

Speaker 2 I thought a fine would be maximum fine, whatever it is, 5K, give him that. And then it kind of shows that, listen, this isn't suspension, but you can't be going around doing that.

Speaker 2 By not fining him or anything, I was really surprised because it kind of shows like there's nothing wrong with what he did. Now, what a pest is, is exactly what Brad Marchand is.

Speaker 2 He's just driving everyone insane. If you're not a fan of the team he plays on, any pest, then you defy him.
You hate playing against him.

Speaker 2 Fans hate him just as much as the guys playing against him do. Everyone despises him and wants to see his face get caved in.
But he's just a really good player, too.

Speaker 2 So that's what makes him the best pest, is that he's one of the best left wings in hockey. Right now, he's not.
And I think that's one of the reasons he pulled that is because he's not scoring, right?

Speaker 2 He's usually, I think he's gone four points without four games without a point.

Speaker 2 He hadn't done that all year, so he's getting frustrated, and he's also probably thinking, all right, well, if I'm not going to score, I'm going to do what else I do best. That's piss people off.

Speaker 2 And if I punch this guy in the back of the head, maybe next game a couple Columbus players worry about getting me back. Maybe I draw a penalty.

Speaker 2 Maybe we get a little momentum in them trying to go after me. So that's the pest job is to piss everyone off.
He does the best job at it.

Speaker 2 It was a dirty play, but he's a hell of a player and he knows exactly what he's doing. But for the people calling for suspension, you got to grow a set.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I agree with that. Now, in your career, did you ever get pested? Did you ever have someone get under your skin?

Speaker 2 No, I wasn't good enough. I wasn't good enough.

Speaker 2 I mean, not necessarily good enough, but a pest might have done something to me. But usually a pest is really trying to get under the skin of the best player on the other team.

Speaker 2 You're just trying to annoy people that could really make an impact. I was more being ignored by the pests.
The pests were like, what are you doing with me, buddy? I'm not trying to to mess with you.

Speaker 2 Stay away from me. You're not worth my time.

Speaker 1 Now, at what point does a pest cross the line into becoming just like a rat bastard?

Speaker 2 I would say it's pretty similar. A pest may be a rat bastard.
I think most pests would be described as rat bastards.

Speaker 1 But not all rat bastards are pests.

Speaker 2 No, I think it goes pretty hand in hand. Call me a rat bastard and I'll take pests any day.
Pest is like a really nice way of calling a rat bastard a rat bastard.

Speaker 1 Sweet, so let me get this right. Because I love this little like game within the game stuff that happens in sports.
The pest. Now, when like if Brad Marshawn sees some guys from the Blue Jackets

Speaker 1 in Vancouver this summer, do people respect him? Are they like, you just got a job to do and we understand it's the job? Or do people take that away from the ice? They're like, fuck this guy.

Speaker 1 He's the worst.

Speaker 2 All right. So that brings up the rat bastard versus pest thing because getting towards rat bastard and worse than that, people might actually hate you off the ice.
Right.

Speaker 2 There's probably a couple people. I I mean, Ryan Callahan and Marshawn licked him in the face.
He might, he probably hates them. But I think for the most part, if you're a pest, people know

Speaker 2 if you, you know, as long as you haven't done something to injure somebody, things like that will carry over off the ice.

Speaker 2 But mostly, every hockey guy meets a guy in the summer, having beers or whatever. You're like, dude, you're a rat on the ice.
I fucking hate you on the ice. But you're still buddies off of it.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 Is there a noticeable difference in your team swagger and your team like just overall mentality and attitude if you have a good pest as opposed to just having a collection of guys that you know have pest tendencies but might not necessarily fill that role oh yeah I mean I think the the thing about having pests and a guy like Marshawn is like every arena the Bruins go into people hate them people hate him and like if you look at say I mean I know we're recording Thursday but say in this game for tonight Marshawn gets a goal couple goals dude like imagine how furious blue jackets fans are going to be they already hate his guts and then he could go out and score and then it's just like hatred on steroids and people are screaming at him and throwing things at him and the whole Bruin team's laughing like look at these fucking nuts we've got them we have them on tilt thanks to Marshie yeah it's interesting because in the NBA playoffs I think the the general well no I'm dead serious this is one of those like NBA versus NHL things in the NBA playoffs the refs have a tendency to call it a little bit more strict at times whereas in the NHL playoffs it's almost like swallow your your whistle let the boys play why do you think the nhl does it that way as as opposed to the other way?

Speaker 2 In terms of just letting guys play more? Yeah.

Speaker 2 I don't know. I think it's just like a long-storied history that playoff hockey, more stuff goes.

Speaker 2 I don't know. That's a good question.

Speaker 2 I think it goes back to just like hockey guys being tough and being able to kind of come back from injury and play through injury and knowing that the playoffs is going to be a different beast in a battle.

Speaker 2 And so you get away with some extra cross-checks and things like that that would probably get called in the regular season.

Speaker 2 But you brought up the NBA first, PFT, and I'll tell you right now, I saw that asshole from the Cavs. I think, no, I don't know what team he was on.

Speaker 2 He broke his nose and came back with a fucking mask on and got a standing ovation. Are you kidding me? Ryan Malone on Pittsburgh, I play with Ryan Malone, got a slapshot directly in the face.

Speaker 2 It was like getting hit with a baseball bat, shoved a couple tampons out there and came back, no mask, no standing ovation for him. Wait.

Speaker 2 To break your nose in the NBA playoffs to come back and the standing, oh, what happened is pathetic. Hold on.

Speaker 1 What's worse, though? Getting puck at your your face, you know, whatever, 90 miles an hour, or getting poked in the eye.

Speaker 2 Poked in the eye sucks. I'd probably

Speaker 2 rather get hit in the face. Yes.

Speaker 1 So James Harden's actually tougher than your friend because he got poked in the eye and he came back in the game. He didn't play well, but he came back in the game.

Speaker 2 I don't know. I'm not going to agree with you because James Harden came back and tried to draw a fucking foul every time he threw up the ball.

Speaker 2 So my buddy came back and kept going to the net looking for more pucks to hit him in the face. So I don't think he's more tough.

Speaker 1 But also, if you get hit in the the face with a puck, your whole face hurts. If you get poked in the eye just in one spot, that's almost worse, I would say.

Speaker 2 Oh, getting poked in the eye blow.

Speaker 1 Yeah, see, we're getting to the truth.

Speaker 1 Hey, wait, hold on. Let me ask you a question because we're talking about injuries here.
Little Birdie told me that you had the flu recently. Oh, no.

Speaker 2 Oh, real bad. In the garden during game two, I was throwing up in the bathroom.
People thought I was like shit-faced. I'm like, dude, I'm sick.
All right, Chick, look, you guys can't drink.

Speaker 2 I'm like, shut up.

Speaker 1 So, did you miss a podcast?

Speaker 2 I did miss a podcast. Iron Man.

Speaker 1 Because you were sick.

Speaker 1 I don't think we've ever missed a podcast.

Speaker 1 Here's the difference between hockey guys and football guys like us: we've never missed a podcast when I threw sick. Yeah, when I threw out my back, I couldn't.

Speaker 1 I literally, Whitney, I could not walk for three straight days. I was pissing in Gatorade bottles.
PFT and Hank and Liam showed up to my apartment and we podcasted there. I broke my foot.

Speaker 1 I was coming out of surgery. I had the IV fluid still coursing through my veins.
Yeah. All the anesthesia.
We still did it. And Whitney had a little sniffles and he skipped a podcast.

Speaker 2 You guys are talking about injuries that you can battle through if people come to you. I was in the bathroom on the toilet, throwing shitting.
Everything was going on. I wasn't able to podcast.

Speaker 2 Trust me. I lost about 10 pounds.
I've been on the IV since. I don't need to hear about you guys grinding it out with a little foot injury.
Try just puking all day long and giving a podcast effort.

Speaker 2 I didn't have it.

Speaker 1 Did you have it? So you're podcast with your butthole, you podcast with your mouth. So I thought you were rich.
Your bathroom doesn't have cell phone reception?

Speaker 2 No, I actually have a bathroom that has just an enormous toilet that costs about $5,000 that cleans my hoop after I'm done using it.

Speaker 1 So it worked out fine. It's just a hole in the ground.
That's all. Did you get bideted in the face while you were puking?

Speaker 2 I wish, actually, at that point, I would have taken some cold water in the face.

Speaker 1 All right,

Speaker 1 let's talk about these playoffs. Let's talk about the series that are going on.
We'll start with the one that I assume you agree is over.

Speaker 1 The Islanders, Frankie Borrelli's Islanders, who we hear way too much Islanders talk in this office. They're done, right?

Speaker 2 They're done. They might win a game.
I really hope they win a game because I'm going to have to make this video. I talked about it on Chicklets.

Speaker 2 You can listen to Spit and Chicklets about the video I'm going to have to make if they get swept. So I hope for their sake they get a win.
I hope, Frankie, you guys get one.

Speaker 2 But Carolina, what a story. It's been crazy.

Speaker 2 It's an awesome story because not a lot of people expected much from them this year. And they had like a two-boalie tandem.
Peter Morazic just got hurt. So Curtis McAlini's now in, and

Speaker 2 all year both guys did a great job. So it's just a, it's a really surprising story, but they have great fans down there.
When the team struggles, nobody goes.

Speaker 2 I guess it's the type of city, like hockey city, where, you know, they got to be really good to get involved. I don't really blame them, whatever.

Speaker 2 It's not the number one sport down there in Tobacco Road. But when they're in the playoffs, that place is wild.
They tailgate before the games.

Speaker 2 And I think that Rod Brindamo, their coach, won a Stanley Cup there. He was the captain.
So there's a lot of good things going on in Carolina.

Speaker 2 And I'm not surprised to see the Islanders lose, but I am surprised to see it be this ugly.

Speaker 1 Yeah, it's pretty bad.

Speaker 1 So Richard Jefferson said a couple of days ago when he was talking about the NBA playoffs that sometimes when you play an inferior team in the first round, a lot of times you come out flat in the second because you haven't been battle-tested.

Speaker 1 So going off that, would you say that the Islanders are playing so poorly because they played such a shitty team in the Pittsburgh Penguins, whereas the Hurricanes played a really great team in the Capitals, and that's why they're doing so well.

Speaker 2 That could be a PFT. I'll run with that if you want to.
We can go with Richard Jefferson, whoever that is.

Speaker 1 That's a good narrative. Okay, yeah.

Speaker 1 So I want you to power rank the following cities in terms of hockey towns. Okay? So Raleigh, Columbus, San Jose, and Dallas.

Speaker 2 San Jose is number one. They've had great fans for a long time now.
I'd actually like to see them.

Speaker 2 I wouldn't mind seeing them win the cup. They're one team I'm kind of for a little bit.
San Jose is number one there. Right now I'm going Columbus number two.

Speaker 2 It's really getting bigger and bigger there. This first time they ever won a playoff series was round one against one of the best regular season teams of all time.
So that place is wild right now.

Speaker 2 I'm talking to people. I guess the Blue Jackets are like the Beatles walking around Columbus.
So they're number two.

Speaker 2 San Jose won because of the longevity. Then I'm going Carolina three because they've been wild, too.
They're showing a lot. And Dallas four.
Dallas, I mean, Dallas and Carolina are kind of the same.

Speaker 2 When the teams suck, nobody goes. Nobody cares.
There's other sports bigger there in those cities.

Speaker 2 But when the teams are good, it's awesome places to play, and that's kind of how it's going right now.

Speaker 1 So please tell me that the Blues aren't going to win a Stanley Cup.

Speaker 2 When I was saying I'd like to see San Jose win, the only team I want to see more is the Blues. They got a chance, man.

Speaker 2 They are a really good team. And it'd be one of the coolest stories ever.
Last place, January 3rd, their odds at that time were 300 to 1. Imagine getting a ticket then.
I think now they're like 5-1.

Speaker 2 So, yeah, they're good, big cat. I mean, they got a lot of good weapons there.
Guys play as a team. They're hard to to play against.
So there's a chance 100% that they could get the cup.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 1 Yeah, fuck.

Speaker 1 I'm just going to pretend. I'm just going to pretend that it's not.
You didn't say any of that.

Speaker 2 I still feel like, I mean, I wouldn't. I mean, I know you got the rivalry with St.
Louis, Cardinals, Cubs. Fuck, Blackhawks lose, but

Speaker 2 you have your Cups. You have your World Teams.

Speaker 1 Yeah, here's the thing.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I'll explain it to you real quick. So Cardinals fans forever obviously were like, the Cubs will never win one.
The Cubs will never win one.

Speaker 1 And now that both the Cubs and obviously the Blackhawks won three cups cups in the last 10 years, it's fun to then reverse it on Cardinals fans and be like, you guys will never win a cup.

Speaker 1 And they're like, that's so fucked up that you'd say that. Like, bro, I had one guy chirp me, and he's like, oh, you're talking about total cups.
That's such a lame thing to do.

Speaker 1 I went to his Twitter avatar, and he had, like, all the St. Louis Cardinals rings in his header.
And I was like, okay, this makes sense.

Speaker 1 Like, you tell me that guy didn't make Cubs jokes before they won it. So it's a little bit of that, you know?

Speaker 2 I know what you're saying now. And listen, like,

Speaker 2 I'm not huge into Twitter. I I mean, I'm on there, but I try not to pay attention too much because during the playoffs, NBA, NHL, like, this and that's losing his mind.
People,

Speaker 2 I don't know, like, people lose their minds on that website now.

Speaker 1 Ruthless.

Speaker 2 What is going on with fans now? It's bizarre. Dude, it is.

Speaker 1 It's crazy. It's crazy.
And here's my favorite thing. Playoff hockey Twitter, when we do the debates of big hits and whether they need suspensions or not,

Speaker 1 that might be like two sides that are more at odds than the Middle East or

Speaker 1 the Hatfield and McCoy's. People cannot get along whatsoever on Twitter when it comes to the playoffs.

Speaker 2 No, they can't at all. And it seems to me like it could be civil.
Like, hey, man, I

Speaker 2 thought that hit was a little high. Elbow kind of hit the guy's head.
I think it should be a game suspension. Next guy.
I disagree. I don't think he hit him that high.

Speaker 2 Okay, well, your fucking mother should die. He gets your fucking hate.
Like, ah, man.

Speaker 1 It all comes down to.

Speaker 1 It just comes down to if it's a player from your team that did it. Right.
Then you always, even if he's guilty, then you just, it's a flowchart. You say, no, he's not guilty.

Speaker 1 And then maybe if somebody makes a good point, yeah, he's definitely guilty. Then you say, well, your guy did the same thing two years ago.
Right.

Speaker 1 Yeah, exactly.

Speaker 2 It always comes back to what your guy did in 1986.

Speaker 1 Yeah, they'll never forget that.

Speaker 1 Actually, along those lines, Gary Bettman said, I think it was earlier today, that he doesn't think that the NHL will ever be able to make all hits to the head illegal just because of the nature of the sport.

Speaker 1 Do you think that's possible at all?

Speaker 2 Yeah, I mean, I don't know if it's ever going to be possible.

Speaker 2 I certainly think that

Speaker 2 the way they're going now, where anytime you get a guy in the head, you're probably getting suspended is the way to go.

Speaker 2 I mean, like, for a long time, you got a penalty if you high-stick the guy with your stick, but you didn't if you hit him with your shoulder in the temple. So

Speaker 2 they're going towards the right direction.

Speaker 1 So one last question before we do a little NBA talk. When you're watching, well, I guess this kind of segues into NBA talk.

Speaker 1 When you're watching an NBA playoff series, it's always interesting because game-to-game, it's the zigzag theory.

Speaker 1 Whatever happened in the last game, it's going to be completely opposite the next game because teams make adjustments, they get used to opponents, whatever it may be.

Speaker 1 In hockey, I feel like the coaches, you know, other than shifting up some lines, especially towards the end of the series when they want to maybe put their best players out there on one line together, is there a lot of like X's and O's, game-to-game stuff that coaches are doing?

Speaker 2 Yeah, there is.

Speaker 2 There's a lot of changing things up. I mean, the best coaches in hockey are ones that are kind of able to adapt on the fly and figure out, all right, they got our breakout figured out.

Speaker 2 We've got to go to something else. Or our four check needs to change.
They're getting out of their zone so easily against us. So it definitely does change, but it's a lot of just execution.

Speaker 2 Like, you can't change your power play that much in terms of

Speaker 2 your setup, what kind of system you're going to run, how you're going to enter the zone. But you've got to work on scoring goals on your PP if

Speaker 2 you can't get anything going. Like, that's how you you have to win playoff series a lot, is on the man advantage.
So there definitely needs to be adjustments game to game.

Speaker 2 I don't think it's as much as the NBA does. I think NBA can change their starting lineup,

Speaker 2 things like that, where hockey, you got your four lines playing.

Speaker 2 Maybe a guy hops in the third or fourth line that was a healthy scratch, but not much changes besides just trying to execute better from game to game.

Speaker 2 This year, I've seen a lot less in the NHL playoffs than years before of momentum in series, where game by game things are switching and it really hasn't been growing.

Speaker 2 So, yeah, that sounds like the NBA a little bit, but I hope that's the only thing it sounds like. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Out west, Logan Couture and Jumbo. What a player.
Those two guys,

Speaker 1 I don't like watching that much hockey outside of, you know, obviously the Washington Capitals and all their rivalries. But it's hard to pay attention sometimes to the late games.

Speaker 1 But I feel like I've been watching those two guys tear shit up out there for a long time. What is it about those two guys in particular that during the playoffs they always show up?

Speaker 2 Well, Thornton's just, you know, he's a Hall of Famer. He's one of the best of all time.
He's been doing this forever. He loves the game.
He's a true hockey guy, in and out.

Speaker 2 And it's no surprise that he always shows up even as he gets older and older. Couture is just,

Speaker 2 I wish I knew basketball better to give you guys an example of who's somebody that's just not the best at anything, but just so good at everything. You know what I'm saying?

Speaker 2 Like, he's not the fastest skater. Austin Rivers.

Speaker 2 Okay, Austin Rivers, whoever.

Speaker 2 He's not the fast skater. Doesn't have the hardest shot.
Doesn't have the

Speaker 2 best hands, but everything together is just this incredible player. I actually read something, Biz read something.
In the last 10 years or nine years, Ovech can leave the NHL in playoff goals with 50.

Speaker 2 Logan Gouteur is number two with 43. That's cool.

Speaker 2 Just the other night. Yeah, exactly, because nobody knows about him.
Just the other night, he said he had to be better before game three in Colorado, San Jose, Colorado series.

Speaker 2 He said before to the reporters in the morning, Shade, I got to be be better. I'm not happy with how I played the first two games.
Goes out, gets a hat-trick that night. So it's like this guy just is

Speaker 2 perfect for the playoffs because of how he plays. He's a honey badger, hunts down the puck great defensively.
He just does it all.

Speaker 2 And somebody that doesn't get enough credit, probably because he is out west, like you're saying, playing late at night, but he's a sick player. Yeah, that's right.

Speaker 1 And

Speaker 1 I'm glad that BizNasty was able to read that article to you. Yeah.

Speaker 2 Yeah, well, it took him a couple hours, but we got it out.

Speaker 1 Two meetings of the minds there. You two.
All right. Last question.
Seek SeekGeek question. Promo code take.
You get $10 off. Go to a hockey playoff game.
There's nothing, nothing like it in sports.

Speaker 1 Promo code take. Seek geek.
Have you been watching the NBA playoffs?

Speaker 2 I see the highlights. I put on that game the other night, an intermission of the Sharks Colorado.
I put on that Houston Warriors game. Yeah.

Speaker 2 It was okay. I mean, I don't, I don't, whatever.
It's all right. It's all right.
I mean, the Warriors are just going to win again. I fuck.
It's so.

Speaker 2 They're going to win again. What is the point of all this?

Speaker 1 What's the equivalent in the NHL to a landing zone foul?

Speaker 1 First explain a landing zone foul.

Speaker 1 Okay, a landing zone foul is when you go up to shoot a jump shot, a three-point shot, something like that, and then the other player walks underneath you as you're in mid-air, so you land on their foot and you could sprain your ankle.

Speaker 1 And that would be devastating, obviously.

Speaker 1 Now the Rockets are just jumping five feet forward into Golden State Warriors players trying to draw that landing zone foul, claiming like five feet in front of me is also my landing zone.

Speaker 2 Okay, so I guess my comparison would be the goalie maybe trying to like sell a little goalie interference.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 2 You could draw on a penalty.

Speaker 2 Like, you know, maybe taking a step outside the crease, bumping into a player, and then throwing your head back, like he bumped into you, and all of a sudden the guy gets two minutes goalie interference.

Speaker 2 That sounds kind of like what that is. But, I mean, if you've already shot the ball, he's not affecting your ability to.

Speaker 1 Well, Well, you have to be able to land.

Speaker 2 Yeah, I guess so. I mean, I saw SVP do that thing on Harden, and every fucking shot he's trying to score looks a little different jump than the ones he's trying to draw a foul.

Speaker 2 And as a coach, I'd be like, buddy, are you trying to score or draw a foul? What is it? Because you jump different every time. Yeah.

Speaker 1 No, it's true. It was James Harden.
Yeah, pretty much.

Speaker 2 Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 1 Although he's a warrior. He got poked in the eye.
Yeah, that's true. Well, he is a rocket warrior.
Yeah, he's a rocket warrior.

Speaker 1 About that, who was it that got hit in the back? Was that the goalie from the stars the other night that got hit in the back?

Speaker 2 That was a little tough. That was tough luck.
That was tough look. That was Ben Bishop.

Speaker 1 Yeah, so he did a little bit of embellishment right there. He's got a little NBA in him.

Speaker 2 Yeah, that should have been a penalty, 100%.

Speaker 2 You can't slash the goalie in the back, but I mean, if he were to get slashed in the back like that in practice, I don't think he would have thrown his arms up in the air and

Speaker 2 fallen over. So, yeah, a little embellishment right there.

Speaker 1 Ben Bishop, famous for having the shits against the Blackhawks in

Speaker 1 Stanley Cup final. Remember that?

Speaker 2 No. Oh, yeah.

Speaker 1 He had the shits. And I think that was game two.
I think it was the game that Hank and I read.

Speaker 2 The shit. I think it's a shit.
No, the shits. I'm like, he's a gold.
The shits.

Speaker 1 No, the shits. Remember?

Speaker 2 Yeah, and I battled through that and missed the podcast the other night. I know what he's going through.

Speaker 1 Tough, tough, tough.

Speaker 1 All right. Well, Ryan, thank you, as always.
Have fun at your event.

Speaker 1 Obviously, this is going to be airing after your event, but if you somehow got a leaked audio footage of this, go out to the bar tonight and see Ryan Whitney. He would love to take a picture with you.

Speaker 1 And listen to Spin Chicklets.

Speaker 1 I really would.

Speaker 2 Any Chicklets fan. I can't wait to see you guys.
And Hank,

Speaker 2 you didn't ask this episode, but I kept forgetting when you say famous situate people or my favorite situate people.

Speaker 2 Do you know who Mike Conroy is?

Speaker 7 Rings a bell.

Speaker 2 Okay, Mike Conroy, everyone should know, one of the best athletes I've ever seen. Sick quarterback.
Then he was a first-round pick in the Major League Baseball Draft.

Speaker 2 Then he went and played baseball for a while never made it in the majors then he came back played football at uconn when he was like 25 years old we grew up the same age he was a good-looking stallion amazing athlete so mike conroy if you don't know if you know citruate you know who mike conroy put it in the wikipedia entry there we go all right i feel like there are probably 20 guys named mike conroy that came out of citruit yeah but none of them

Speaker 7 just real mike conroy yeah yeah right right you've been keeping up with any of the uh the local politics going on whitney

Speaker 2 uh no i've kind of of been staying away from that hank you motherfucker you're at me

Speaker 1 all right see you

Speaker 2 all right

Speaker 1 hey it's pft here reminding you that boars head makes game day entertaining elevated and effortless whether you order catering platters ahead from your local boars head retailer or you create your own spread at home with boars head premium deli meats and cheeses you are sure to impress your guests My favorites like oven gold turkey or blazing buffalo style chicken paired with their classic Vermont cheddar or creamy Munster cheese are sure to score big and help me elevate my entertainment every time, whether it's for a tailgate or a home gating celebration.

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And now,

Speaker 1 Randy Moss. And now for something completely different.

Speaker 1 Okay, we welcome on. Probably

Speaker 1 the guy that I get the most tweets about every single year right around this time. It is one of our very first guests, the original Randy Moss.
He will be on your TV on Friday.

Speaker 1 He'll be on your TV all Saturday for the Kentucky Derby. Randy, it's great to talk to you.
We're ready to go. Please start with explaining what the hell happened to Omaha Beach.

Speaker 2 Okay, I'll try. I'm walking through the grandstand, by the way.
So if it sounds a little chaotic, there have been some people that already on Thursday have been overserved.

Speaker 2 So I don't know what that 4KN is coming up for the next couple of days, but anyway.

Speaker 2 Okay, he suffered an entrapped epiglottis.

Speaker 2 So what the epiglottis is, if you guys really care,

Speaker 2 it's the little thing in the throat that keeps the food from going down the wrong pipe.

Speaker 2 And

Speaker 2 if it gets inflamed or if there's some tissue around it that gets

Speaker 2 infected, it can prevent the epiglottis from doing what it's supposed to do, and it can actually cause a breathing obstruction. And it's actually kind of endemic to thoroughbred racehorses.

Speaker 2 You see it all the time. You can be standing by the rail in the morning, watching, you know, when it's quiet, and watching horses work and gallop in the morning, and sometimes you can hear them.

Speaker 2 It sounds like a freight train coming down the track.

Speaker 2 And it's horses that are having trouble getting their air. They have a bit of a breathing problem.
You can surgically correct it. It's a very minor surgery.
Horses can be sent back into training in

Speaker 2 a week or two, and they can race again in a matter of weeks.

Speaker 2 But they're going to be pretty conservative with Omaha Beach because he's such a good horse, and they're probably going to wait till the summer before they run him again.

Speaker 1 Okay, so he's a choker, in other words. Yes.

Speaker 2 He would have been a choker if he had run in the Kentucky Derby with this condition.

Speaker 1 Yes, definitely. Okay, so

Speaker 1 this is like a high draft prospect in the NCAA skipping the second half of the season to prepare for the draft.

Speaker 2 This is like a high-draft prospect going through the medical examination at the Combine and flunking it.

Speaker 1 But he's still going to get paid. They're going to stud him out after all this, right?

Speaker 2 Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah.
And as a matter of fact, days before it was announced that when he retires to stud, he's going to go to Spendthrift Farm in Lexington, Kentucky.

Speaker 2 So that's already been arranged even before this.

Speaker 1 There we go. He's ready to go.
So the other story I want to get to before we get some winners from you, the weather. It's supposed to be terrible tomorrow.

Speaker 1 It's supposed to be terrible Saturday in terms of rain. Can you explain to us what happens when the track gets muddy and what, you know, how do the horses respond?

Speaker 1 And what should we be looking for when we're betting?

Speaker 2 The smart horses don't run very well in the mud. It's the ones that aren't so smart.
I like that.

Speaker 2 That seemed to do well.

Speaker 2 Seriously,

Speaker 2 a lot of it has to do with running style.

Speaker 2 Because if you're a horse that comes from behind, like last year, for example, in the Kentucky Derby, it was a sea of mud, right?

Speaker 2 And even though the pace was unbelievably fast, Justify was up on the pace all the way and wins and comes back to the winner's circle with pristine silks. looking like he hadn't even run in a race.

Speaker 2 And then you have the horses that came from behind in that race, okay?

Speaker 2 And their trainers told me that two or three days later, they were still washing mud out of their horses' eyes.

Speaker 2 Horses get hit with these walls of water and mud when they come from behind. And obviously, that can be very discouraging to a horse, especially a smart horse.

Speaker 2 And they can just decide, you know, the hell with this.

Speaker 2 And so that's why typically when you have a wet racetrack like that, the horses that run near the front have the advantage because they're not getting all that stuff kicked in their faces.

Speaker 1 Okay, that's interesting to note. I like that.

Speaker 1 I mean, that makes sense. Get heads.
I don't want to be in this much. Yeah.
Yeah. I like that game.
Exactly. Can you give me a villain? Like, which horse should I root against?

Speaker 2 A villain.

Speaker 2 How about maximum security?

Speaker 2 Let's make maximum security into the villain. Only because, only because.
He won the Florida Derby. He's undefeated.

Speaker 2 Okay, but there should be a kind of an asterisk by his last win in the Florida Derby because

Speaker 2 the competition in that race just basically handed him the race

Speaker 2 in a nicely wrapped gift box.

Speaker 2 They didn't even try to pressure him at all on the front end. The jockey didn't expect to be on the lead.
The trainer didn't expect to be on the lead.

Speaker 2 Everybody else just decided to take back, and all of a sudden this horse is just cruising, loping along. on an easy lead and therefore he was able to win pretty impressively.

Speaker 2 A lot of people are going to be betting on him.

Speaker 2 But his last race was just a little bit phony in that regard.

Speaker 1 I like that. Just a little tidbit there.
Maximum security ain't played nobody. Yeah, so Omaha Beach out.
Give us maybe the top three

Speaker 1 horses that you see winning this race. So maybe not even the odds, who you can see winning this race on Saturday.

Speaker 2 To me, the top three contenders to win,

Speaker 2 first of all, game winner, trained by Bob Baffert. Surprise, surprise.

Speaker 2 There's never been a single year in the 145-year history of the Kentucky Derby in which one trainer has saddled the top three betting favorites in the race.

Speaker 2 And Bob Bafford has a chance to do that on Saturday, now that Omaha Beach is out, with Game Winner, Roadster, and Improbable.

Speaker 2 They'll be the three horses that will start as the top three favorites in the morning line when betting begins.

Speaker 2 And I think they're the logical horses that are going to wind up being the top three betting picks. But Game Winner, to me, is the best one of the three.

Speaker 2 He's 0 for 2 this year, but he should have won both those races. I think he's coming up to the race in good fashion.

Speaker 2 The only thing we don't know about Game Winner is if it's a sea of mud and he's a come from behind her.

Speaker 2 He's never running it before.

Speaker 2 And so we don't know how he will handle it.

Speaker 2 Okay, then there's a horse named Tacitus,

Speaker 2 who was trained by Bill Mott, who's never won the Kentucky Derby Hall of Fame trainer, great trainer.

Speaker 2 He won the Wood Memorial at Aqueduct and was broadsided at the start and managed to win anyway. So, you know, the Derby's got a lot of bumping and grinding going on with 20 horses sometimes.

Speaker 2 He's been involved in something like that and not only held his own, but he won the race.

Speaker 2 And then one of Baffert's other two, it's kind of a toss-up, but I would probably lean toward improbable over Roadster.

Speaker 2 Improbable was second to Omaha Beach in the Arkansas Derby and really trying hard coming to the wire. And he does have some experience on a sloppy racetrack.

Speaker 1 I like Improbable.

Speaker 1 I was reading up about the horses before you came on, and Improbable, they said, is a troublemaker in that he has a bad temperament, but if you can get him running in a straight line, he can beat anyone else on the racetrack that day.

Speaker 2 The story of his name is kind of funny, too. He has basically the same ownership as Justify, the Triple Crown winner of last year.

Speaker 2 And he looks a little bit like him. So the owners are like, you know, how improbable would this be

Speaker 2 if improbable, if this horse can win the Kentucky Derby? So they named, that's why they named him Improbable.

Speaker 1 I like that. Okay.
That

Speaker 1 makes me want to bet on him.

Speaker 1 We have a minor stake in win-win-win turning out to win.

Speaker 1 Tell us what your thoughts on that horse are because I think if win-win-win does win, what do we do? We get like $1,000 and we're in the running to win a trip somewhere?

Speaker 1 Yeah, we each get $1,000, and we don't have to put anything up for it.

Speaker 2 Well, coincidentally, I'll tell you the same thing that I've told a dozen other people that have asked me who I thought were the best long shots in the Kentucky Derby. Win-win-win.

Speaker 1 All right.

Speaker 2 And a horse named By My Standards, who won the Louisiana Derby, but he's still probably going to be, you know, anywhere from 18 to 25 to 1. That's about the price win-win-win is going to be, too.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 2 But even back in February, I texted my colleague, my great friend Jerry Bailey, and said, you got to watch this horse. You know, here's the date.
Here's the race. You're not going to believe this.

Speaker 2 This horse is really good.

Speaker 2 And it was win-win-win. And we've both been following him ever since.
And I think he's set up to run a pretty good race. But again, if it's really sloppy.

Speaker 2 You know, he's a horse that comes from behind. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Okay. But I like that.
So before we get your Oaks picks, which I think you've hit like nailed three years in a row on this show,

Speaker 1 give me one horse that I can throw into into my exotics in the Kentucky Derby.

Speaker 1 Maybe a horse that will come, like you said, it's probably going to be tough to come from behind on Saturday, but a horse that has long odds that might finish well here and get into that third spot.

Speaker 2 You could now, okay.

Speaker 2 Win-win-win and by my standards are both going to be long shots, and I think they have the best chance to hit the board in the super effective.

Speaker 2 But if you're talking about a horse that's going to be like an obscene price, right?

Speaker 2 I mean, you're talking about a huge long shot, then I would lean toward a horse like Cutting Humor, who was trained by Todd Pletcher. He won the Sunland Park Derby in El Paso.

Speaker 2 So he's going to fly way under the radar.

Speaker 2 My Net Bird ran in the Sunday Park Derby, but that's the only horse that's ever come out of the Sundland Park Derby to win the Kentucky Derby.

Speaker 2 But he ran good in that race. He ran very well.

Speaker 2 He ran a fast time, track record time. He was outside on the turn, so he lost some ground, managed to win anyway.
He'll come from behind. So he'll be a big prize.
He'll be 40-50 40-50 to one.

Speaker 1 Okay. And now the Oaks,

Speaker 1 you have killed it on the Friday picks. Have I? Yes, you have.
Okay. And I'm sure

Speaker 1 you'll have your picks also during the telecast. But yeah, I think you're

Speaker 1 three years in a row. I think you have gotten our listeners winners on Friday.
So, you know, whatever race you like, whatever horse you like on Friday, lay it on us.

Speaker 2 Well, let's talk about the Oaks.

Speaker 2 The favorite in the Oaks is going to be a horse named Belafina.

Speaker 2 And Bellafina is a horse based in California. And if you watch all of Belafina's races in California, they're sensational.
And she looks in those races in California.

Speaker 2 If you compare those races to all the rest of the horses in the Kentucky Oaks,

Speaker 2 if they weren't Phillies, you'd say it was like a man-against boys kind of thing, right?

Speaker 2 But the only bad race Belafina has ever had in her life was in the Breeders' Cup Juvenile Phillies of last year. She ran a bad fourth, didn't look very good, and that was here at Churchill Downs.

Speaker 2 The only race that she's ever run outside of the state of California.

Speaker 2 And since she's been here at Churchill Downs, you know,

Speaker 2 she hadn't been here that long, not even a week, but they take her out in the morning and gallop her.

Speaker 2 And, you know, you got all these people, you know, thousand people watching every horse as they come out. analyzing them and picking them apart.
She hasn't looked very good.

Speaker 2 So she's going to be the favorite.

Speaker 2 As a matter of fact, if you would watch her in the mornings around the track, you would say,

Speaker 2 I don't

Speaker 2 couldn't bet on her.

Speaker 2 And for a horse to have those negatives and to be the favorite, I think it's a good horse to bet against. So there are two horses that I'm tossed up between.
So a horse named Champagne Anyone

Speaker 2 and Restless Rider. I think I would give Restless Rider an advantage over Champagne Anyone, but to me,

Speaker 2 that's a pretty good exact to play.

Speaker 1 Okay,

Speaker 1 I like that. I had one last question.

Speaker 1 Explain to me,

Speaker 1 there's a horse in the Kentucky Derby that's coming from the United Arab Emirates, and those horses can't, they've never won.

Speaker 1 Explain to me the difference between horses that come from that far away and race in a completely different region of the world and what happens when they come all the way to America and haven't been able to win the big race.

Speaker 2 Well, okay.

Speaker 2 There are two different ways to explain that, and I won't take too much of your time and bore you with it.

Speaker 2 United Arab Emirates, horse racing in the United Arab Emirates is basically controlled by the ruler of Dubai, Sheikh Mohammed, who spends as much or more money on race horses than anybody else in the world.

Speaker 2 For his entire 30-plus years in the thoroughbred business, he has coveted the Kentucky Derby. and has never been able to win it.
But

Speaker 2 he's always wanted to do it his way.

Speaker 2 Because he wants to promote Dubai. He wants to train the horses in Dubai, race the horses in Dubai, and then bring them over to the United States to run into Kentucky Derby, and it just doesn't work.

Speaker 2 The competition over there is not as tough.

Speaker 2 The travel is not that, you know, is not that desirable. And so those horses typically have not lived up to expectations, although they haven't really been that good anyway.

Speaker 2 This year, this horse, the top two finishers, actually, raced in the United States.

Speaker 2 They were one was in Louisiana, one was in California, and they weren't winning, and they weren't good enough to win in the prep races in the United States.

Speaker 2 But they thought, you know, we can ship halfway across the world, and it's a $2 million purse, and the competition is like

Speaker 2 very subpar.

Speaker 2 Why not?

Speaker 2 So they did, and they finished first and second. And they got the points to run in the Kentucky Derby.
So now Pluth Caparfait and Grey Magician have made it into the Kentucky Derby field.

Speaker 2 They'll both be about 50 to 1,

Speaker 2 but they have a lot of money in the bank.

Speaker 1 Okay. Do horses get jet lag?

Speaker 2 Yes.

Speaker 2 Oh, yeah.

Speaker 2 As a matter of fact, there used to be a handicapping theory called the Dubai bounce. Horses that came back from Dubai, a lot of times,

Speaker 2 wouldn't be any good the rest of the year.

Speaker 1 Huh. Interesting.

Speaker 2 Trainers have figured out a way, in a lot of cases, to alleviate that with hydration, with vitamins, a lot of other little things that they've tried.

Speaker 2 It's not as bad as it used to be, but oh, yeah, their horses definitely get jet-like.

Speaker 1 Okay, what's your hydration schedule? Because we were talking before we went on the air here that you do a seven-hour day on Saturday.

Speaker 1 And I know, like, Mel Kuyper, he doesn't really drink any water when he's doing the draft, so he doesn't have to get up and use the bathroom.

Speaker 1 Do you have like a regiment that you stick to every derby day?

Speaker 2 That is funny that you would ask that. I weigh 175 pounds.
I've got a personal trainer who tells me that I have to drink half of my body weight in ounces. So

Speaker 2 I've got to drink between 85

Speaker 2 and 90 ounces of water, which is a hell of a lot of water to drink. And I can't do it.
I can't do it.

Speaker 1 I can get about half that.

Speaker 2 I'm a total wimp when it comes to downing that much water.

Speaker 1 How much do you drink? A lot. A lot.
Tonight.

Speaker 1 I've got 32 ounces right next to me.

Speaker 1 Well, yeah, I drink one of these. I drink 32 ounces of water.
I drink like 60 gallons a day. I'm a big old horse.

Speaker 2 So we're doing this from the bathroom, right?

Speaker 1 Yeah, pretty much. Pretty much.
Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 1 Are you a mint julep guy?

Speaker 2 I hate them.

Speaker 2 It's like drinking lighter fluid.

Speaker 1 Have you ever had a mint julep?

Speaker 1 I like them once a year.

Speaker 2 Yeah.

Speaker 2 Oh, I can't even go that far. Yeah, no.

Speaker 2 I like them once a lifetime, and I didn't even like that.

Speaker 1 It's definitely an acquired taste, for sure.

Speaker 2 I'm a margarita guy, not a mentor guy.

Speaker 1 All right. Well, thank you so much, Randy.
As always, it's a pleasure. Hopefully, we'll talk to you in a couple weeks when we have the start of maybe another triple crown winner.

Speaker 1 And enjoy the weekend and good luck on Saturday. Hopefully, you can stay a little bit dry.
And everyone, make sure to tweet at Randy your thanks when he nails those oaks picks up. Yes, yes.

Speaker 1 Tweet at him.

Speaker 2 We'll talk again from not so lovely Pemlico. Yes.

Speaker 1 Thank you, Randy. Talk to you soon.

Speaker 2 All right. Take care.
Bye-bye.

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Speaker 1 What?

Speaker 1 Okay, let's get to some segments. First up, we have an NP Arden.
My take. Jeff Fisher's credit cards were stolen.
We got to get to the bottom of it.

Speaker 1 This is a Global Link prepaid call from Doug Gottlieb, an inmate at the Salt Lake County Correctional Facility. Yeah, he took that shit

Speaker 1 on Wednesday, May 1st. Jeff Fisher, the legend of the NFL and future coach of the year, had his credit card stolen from his car in a Utah parking lot.

Speaker 1 Our search took us far and wide as a culprit was on the loose, but all signs pointed to one man.

Speaker 1 I think we figured that one out.

Speaker 1 Mystery solved. Mystery solved.
We know a guy who loves to steal credit cards. Can I just read this tweet from Jeff Fisher for you? Please do.

Speaker 1 My and my son's pickups were broken into in Cedar City, Utah. According to PD, here's POI, parentheses, person of interest, using our credit cards, HVINFO, please reference case C1901503.

Speaker 1 And they said, please help me find this alleged POS in parentheses piece of shit. With the I bleeped out.
With the I bleeped out. Jeff Fisher,

Speaker 1 his Twitter like

Speaker 1 awakening. It's been wonderful to watch.
It's been incredible. Yeah, so hopefully they got to the bottom of this.

Speaker 1 You hate to see that happen, but it is pretty funny to just imagine Coach Fisher and his son driving around town, running the same errands, but in different trucks.

Speaker 1 parking next to each other with their separate trucks. And what are we going to do to this guy? That's the other part.
It's like, we're going to find this guy, and

Speaker 1 we're going to ask him for the credit cards back. If you see the visual of the guy, he's probably already been arrested a few times for credit card theft.
Yeah, why? You know what? I'm not going to.

Speaker 1 I love Coach Fisher. He's a friend, so

Speaker 1 were your credit cards just sitting there? We don't snitch on this podcast. Yeah, no, we don't snitch.
We don't snitch. Also, it looks like he went to McDonald's, which, I mean.

Speaker 1 He could be an award-winning listener, too. The

Speaker 1 P.O.S. If you're a a P.O.
shit that stole Jeff Fisher's credit card, just please give him back. Yeah, please, please.
All will be right with the world. Yeah, you're not going to be able to do that.

Speaker 1 No, he didn't do anything. I'm not going to make the joke, but many people have probably said

Speaker 1 that's a pretty hefty prison sentence. That's like seven to nine years.
Oh, PFT, don't do that. I'm just saying I didn't make it.
I was saying I saw other people probably make it in my brain.

Speaker 1 Okay, fine. Skip Ellis said that Kevin Durant versus MJ is a real debate.

Speaker 1 Sure did.

Speaker 1 Bad visual. This guy, it was unbelievable, this Dodger fan, tried to catch two foul balls and drop $50 worth of food in the process.
These are in like three innings apart.

Speaker 1 Hilarious move. Also brings us to the all-time question,

Speaker 1 what is it about foul balls that grown men can't help themselves? They're awesome. They are a surprise.
I'm not saying I would do anything different if I were this guy.

Speaker 1 I like to think I would be the guy at the game that would catch a ball and immediately look around to to give it to a kid.

Speaker 1 But in all honesty, here's what would happen if I got a foul ball.

Speaker 7 Okay.

Speaker 1 I'm in the stands. I like jump for it across two people.

Speaker 1 I don't even think,

Speaker 1 I probably, no, I'm very, I used to be able to dunk. Okay.
And so maybe I knock a woman off balance, not over, but I'm not thinking about it. PFT, you just hit a woman.

Speaker 1 And so I get it and I catch it with bare hand and then I jump up twice and then I think, PFT, what the fuck are you doing? And then I look around to give the ball away.

Speaker 1 But bad news, the camera had already cut away from me before i gave the ball away and so then i have to explain that's what's going to happen to me eventually i can already see it coming i i love that if you watch the video the guy's dad i assume immediately gets on the phone being like you won't believe it we got on tv for two seconds for him missing a foul ball and that's like such a relatable moment where not only are you saying fuck this $25 sandwich that I probably bought just a second ago I want this foul ball but then also being like oh my god I got on TV making a fool of myself.

Speaker 1 Everyone, record it. Please make sure you check it.
I might even be on the news. If you watch it, though, it's so funny because the first time it's French fries and I think a burger.

Speaker 1 And then the second time it's like a full pizza that he drops. And they're laughing out loud and funny.
It's like slapstick comedy watching fall over. But spin zone, that's a great diet.
True.

Speaker 1 Just get, just go to a Major League Baseball game and get foul balls hit at you. Foul balls.
And yeah, and you spill all your food all the time and you won't get fat.

Speaker 1 Also, fuck the NBA because they have warped my brain where anytime someone in the stands does anything hilarious, I'm like, well, that was a plant. Yeah.
And I said that out loud.

Speaker 1 I was like, this is such a plant. And then I did the math in my head.
I was like, but how would they hit him twice with him right there? Yeah, it's a plant. Fuck it.

Speaker 1 He did look like the guy from the gift that's walking out to wash his car that just spills everything all over himself.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I thought my brain went to the same place yours did. So maybe they just had that part of the ballpark being filmed pre-game, and they just shot some balls up there

Speaker 1 and taped it and then piped it in during the broadcast.

Speaker 1 Anytime it was hit just in that general direction. You're like, oh, we got him again.
Fuck.

Speaker 1 The internet's ruined everything. That's probably what they did.
It's ruined everything. We have a Mike Greenberg's dumb rules.

Speaker 1 Explain this dumb rule for us as the greeny stan. Okay, so I don't like the tone of voice you just said.
I said greenie stan. There was some.
Stan is actually a comment.

Speaker 1 That means you're a number one fan. Yeah, but there was like a little bit of looking down on me being a greeny stan.

Speaker 1 Like, we're not, well, we're both sitting down.

Speaker 1 Like, there's not a lot of us in there in that culture. So, just know that

Speaker 1 we are legioned. There's almost 50,000 every morning.
Yep. So,

Speaker 1 what happened was

Speaker 1 college football changed their overtime rule, where now, if you go to five overtimes, the ball snapped from the two-yard line. This is the reaction to the LSU Texas AM.

Speaker 1 Yeah, it's just one problem that's being solved right now.

Speaker 1 Remember that awesome game we all love? There's one game a year, one game a year that this will fix. One incredible game per year that they're going to change.
This makes me lose an over.

Speaker 1 I don't know. I can't figure out the math on it.
No, it would help the over. No, but

Speaker 1 it would help the over here. Right.

Speaker 1 All right, so we're good. Yeah, we're good.
Perfect. Again, it never goes to fall.

Speaker 1 Greeny hates it. Greeny, first of all, hates college overtime rules.
He thinks that it's a mockery of the game. Which is hilarious because everyone's like, These rules are awesome.

Speaker 1 Everyone gets the ball, and there's more points. That's the one thing that we can all agree on is that college football overtime is great.

Speaker 1 It is great fun. So he made a couple analogies.
First of all, he said that's like if you did the playoff at the Masters on a putt-puck green,

Speaker 1 which I'm not opposed to, like bringing the windmill or the clown. By the way, that's a nice little sneaky trick that Greeny does all the time.

Speaker 1 He compares a new rule to changing something at the Masters, the stuffiest place in the world where the rules have never changed.

Speaker 1 Yep. Could you imagine? And he also said a better idea would be to have the mascots arm wrestle.
Okay.

Speaker 1 That's Greeney being like, someday maybe I can play for the Jets

Speaker 1 as the arm wrestling mascot. He would get his ass kicked.
I know, but he would at least get to lace him up. Yeah.
You know what? I think it's week two.

Speaker 1 Texas Longhorns, LSU Tigers, having Bevo and Mike the Tiger arm wrestle would be sick as shit.

Speaker 1 That would be really good. Yeah.
Having them. Well, no, we don't want them to fight to the death.
I mean, actually, I would have five mascots. I wouldn't not watch.
I mean, Mike would kill him.

Speaker 1 I wouldn't enjoy it. Really? Bevo's got the horns, and he outweighs him by like a thousand pounds.
I guess if Mike was smart,

Speaker 1 if Mike has any intelligence, he'll win that easily because he's just got to go behind Bevo. If he goes right at Bevo, Bevo could get him with one.

Speaker 1 The real question is going to be if Coach O was training Mike. Yes.
Because if Coach O was training him, Mike all day. He's going to run the ball.
He's going to be broken.

Speaker 1 Right down Bevo's throat throat. Right down his throat.
Yeah, smash mouth.

Speaker 1 All right. Wrapping up before we get to FAQs and Game of Thrones, we have a Kingstay Kings

Speaker 1 for Jameis Winston.

Speaker 1 So, Jameis Winston, tell me exactly what this is again. He says he wants to play at 250 pounds next year.
And my reaction was,

Speaker 1 is that less or more? Well, it's one of these things where it's a narrative that Jameis is getting big. The reality is he says that he played at 245 last year.
I do not believe that what's happening.

Speaker 1 He weighed in at the combine at 231.

Speaker 1 There's no way.

Speaker 1 When you told me that headline, I was like, oh, so Jameis is going to lose 20 pounds. Yeah.
But no, he's going to gain weight. I mean, stick with what works, I guess.
Just get to fat. He's fat fatter.

Speaker 1 The new Jared Lorenzen.

Speaker 1 I mean, it is smart to always, like, if you get to a point in your career in sports where things might not be going your way and you're up on a big season, you have to do the news dump of a body change.

Speaker 1 It's also great to just announce ahead of time that you're going to get fat. Right.
That way, when you do get fat, people are like, this is part of the plan. Right.

Speaker 1 He's actually doing, he's actually working out really hard this is by eating a lot this is good that his face is now twice the size that it used to be it's good that it looks like he got stung by bees all offseason how many uh calories are in a dub

Speaker 1 because he put on a significant amount of weight yeah that's a good point sucked down those middle fingers carb-free dub carb free dub yeah need one of those yeah uh hank let's finish it up how did the pile actually start and at what point did it reach the point of no return

Speaker 1 sentence okay so the pile started i think with when we first moved into this office, we said, everyone send us mail and we will do a video series where we open it.

Speaker 1 Good idea. We'll leave it at that.
Problem with that idea is we actually have to open it and do stuff.

Speaker 1 That part is the wrinkle there. So that's a wrench in the past.

Speaker 7 Well, we did the video, and then if you remember, you probably don't. I was like, let's put the video out.
And it was like a running joke of yours to be like, oh, we'll put it out next week.

Speaker 7 We'll put it out next week. We'll put it out next week.
We'll put it out next week. We never put it out.

Speaker 1 We'll put it out next week. It was a good video.
The pile grew. And it's funny because it's a joke that no one else knows about except us.
Yeah. So we got to keep some things to ourselves.

Speaker 1 I think we were kind of products of our environment too because Big Cat has the corner spot. Yeah.
And so the corner is just naturally where things gravitate towards.

Speaker 1 So we had all these boxes that we just started stacking up behind his chair. And then before you know it, Big Cat's just throwing his like every t-shirt that he gets.

Speaker 1 Every t-shirt, everything that's been sent to me.

Speaker 1 The other thing I have is: I am a big,

Speaker 1 after I eat, I need to sometimes costume change, as they say in the theater business, I think.

Speaker 1 And by that, I mean I will go from a t-shirt to a sweatshirt, back to a bigger sweatshirt to a smaller sweatshirt. Basically, anytime I eat something, I feel like I need to cover myself in a blanket.

Speaker 1 So I made sure I had like blankets on deck. You need to get that examined, that tendency.
I feel like you need to unpack that. Well, every time because I feel fat.

Speaker 1 I'm on the edge of being like grossly fat, and every time I eat something, I go over that edge. Every time I eat a meal,

Speaker 1 I have to cry in a tarp for 30 minutes. Pretty much.
Pretty much. Yeah, I would talk to somebody about that.
Stella does that, too.

Speaker 1 She just jumps right underneath my covers every time she eats breastfeeding. She's ashamed that she's getting her dead.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 That's sweet, actually.

Speaker 7 Was there ever an event or moment when you three looked at each other and realized 1.0 wasn't enough and that there was going to have to be an HQ 2.0?

Speaker 1 No, I don't think so because we just kind of go. Well, we're not really.
I was going to say every day, but yeah. But we've gotten so used to it that it's just like we just show up and do things.

Speaker 1 But it really is like every day has been when we have so many podcasts going out of here, like having to juggle it and having to kick people out of the studio or being like, we can't tape that because someone else is here.

Speaker 1 So basically every day, but PFT is right. It became just, we became numb to it.
It's going to be awesome.

Speaker 1 We actually, I was working on booking a guest for a couple weeks from now, and just the text message saying, come whenever was awesome.

Speaker 1 But it shouldn't have said that way. Yeah, just come wherever you want.
And the guest that I'm talking about is even grosser, but it is very, very gross. Come wherever.

Speaker 1 But a spin zone on that would be now we look really desperate. We're like, oh, yeah, just show up whenever.
We don't have anything else going on. True, so we got to fake

Speaker 1 busy this and be like, hey,

Speaker 1 we have studio availability from like 4 to 4.15. Can you make it? Can you make it? Yeah.
Good point.

Speaker 7 Kill fuck Mary, Rite Aid, CVS, Walgreens.

Speaker 1 Okay,

Speaker 1 I'm going to. What's the difference?

Speaker 1 Kill which one sells booze? I'm going to kill Walgreens.

Speaker 1 I'm going to kill Walgreens because they partnered up with Theranos. Okay.
And they took people's blood and screwed it up. But she was pretty convincing.
She was.

Speaker 1 She did do that low voice, and she had the Steve Jobs thing. That's true.

Speaker 1 Swore the black sweaters. You know what? I don't blame Walgreens.
You don't blame Walgreens. I don't blame Walgreens at all.
I would get duped, too. Okay.
I'm still coming.

Speaker 1 I mean, I bought a fucking soccer team, dude. I'm marrying CVS.
Love their receipts. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Good kindling for firewood. Always stay warm.
Yep. And then what was the last one? Rite Aid? Right Aid.
Who gives a shit? Yeah, I'll fuck Riteida. I know what that is.

Speaker 1 I'll get drunk and fuck Rite Aid when I... Yeah.
I mean,

Speaker 1 they all are, I think, intentionally look the same. They're all red letterings.
Yeah. And you just go and get your candy.

Speaker 1 Rite Aid looks kind of like shit. Like, you need a couple beers to get through the doors of Rite Aid.
Okay. All right, I'll stick with what you got.

Speaker 7 Sup, boys, and especially Reverend PFT.

Speaker 1 How often do people

Speaker 7 still not know who you are on Twitter? Specifically, how many times a day does PFT get his grammar corrected by non-AWLs?

Speaker 1 Not much. Not much.

Speaker 1 Wait, how many times a day do people not know who I am? I would say like 99% of people that I run into.

Speaker 1 No, on Twitter. Oh, on Twitter.

Speaker 7 So like when you tweet stuff with misspellings, how many people

Speaker 7 don't get the joke?

Speaker 1 I don't know. It's tough because some people on Twitter, this will shock you, or just dicks.
Yeah. And then some people.

Speaker 1 People also, I've come to this theory, it's probably not even novel,

Speaker 1 but everyone is on Twitter and they're reading things incorrectly. Like everyone.
Yeah. So anytime I make a bad joke, it's your fault for reading it wrong.

Speaker 1 No, but like when you read your own replies, you're like, why are people yelling at me? It's like, they're probably not. They're probably joking around.
You're just in a bad mood.

Speaker 1 Like that happened to me the other day. Yeah.
Honestly, people were being mean to me about the cable thing. They were.

Speaker 1 So don't be, no matter what you do, do not be mean to Big Cat about his cable thing. Don't ever again.
Don't. That's the one thing that he really hates about Twitter.

Speaker 1 No, it, I guess, barely. I don't really notice when it happens, I guess.

Speaker 7 All right, last one. Two-part question.
Did the part of my take crew have a falling out with Paula Duca?

Speaker 7 And if not, why won't Big Cat slash PFT acknowledge the question when asked, who says this is part of my take presented by Barstool Sports?

Speaker 1 So no to Paul Aduca. I actually saw him last summer at Saratoga, and I have no clue why the second part of the question pertains to to the first.
Yeah, we like Paul. Paul's our friend.

Speaker 1 We'll have him on again summertime. Whenever he wants, really.
Yeah. Open invite Paul.
When he's back in New York, one of the craziest guys I know. Oh, last, last, last one.

Speaker 7 Can you do a number two without a number one?

Speaker 1 No. No.
Impossible. No.
And also. That could be a challenge, though.
People, like, on the internet, they just label everything a challenge. What would this one be? Like the

Speaker 1 no-one challenge. Did you do the ARIA challenge?

Speaker 1 What's that? Where you flip something to the other hand?

Speaker 1 You just did the Aria challenge.

Speaker 1 That was terrible.

Speaker 1 By the way, was that written in by like a four-year-old? Can you do a number one without a number two?

Speaker 7 It was written in by Jabiz.

Speaker 1 Jobiz.

Speaker 7 Capital J, lowercase A, capital B, I, Z, Z.

Speaker 1 Shout out to BizNasty for finally learning how to use the toilet correctly. Yeah, Jabba.
Good friends.

Speaker 1 I'm going to try. Next time I go number two, I'm going to try.
Let us know how to do it.

Speaker 7 Yeah, record.

Speaker 7 Put a GoPro GoPro in the toilet. So we know.
So we know what to do.

Speaker 1 So you can know what's coming up. Yeah, I should probably go viral.
I could probably sell that.

Speaker 1 Would I have to squeeze the number one? We're not going to tell you how to do it. Or do you think I can just do it mind over matter? Maybe just put a little wad of paper in your hole.

Speaker 1 Just plug myself up. I didn't say witch hole.

Speaker 7 You do have problems going number one, that's true. Yeah, no, I don't.

Speaker 1 I can go number one right now. You're shy.
Pee on your face. Maybe that's what you got to do.
Take a shit

Speaker 1 while Mark Schler's pissing his pants. I just need it.
I need a crap Yeah in front of people in a live camera Yes, exactly I just won't be able to see

Speaker 1 Okay, quickly Game of Thrones Hank Where are we with Game of Thrones? Like I don't even know that was such a big hyped up episode that I don't know where we go.

Speaker 7 Yeah, we're a little let down I kind of

Speaker 7 I've come down like since the season started. I was so hyped for episode one for episode two for episode three super super hyped.
I was a little bit let down with how episode three kind of played out.

Speaker 7 So I'm more of just like all right, we'll see how it plays out. Hopefully they don't fuck it up too bad.

Speaker 1 I re-watched Winterfell.

Speaker 1 I can't stress enough how bad the strategy was. Yes.
It was mind-numbingly bad. From the Dothraki, which we mentioned, to just everything.
And

Speaker 1 why wouldn't they just stay in the fucking castle to begin with and just shoot fire at this shit?

Speaker 1 I've got a conspiracy I just came up with right now. Okay.

Speaker 1 What if the Dothraki are all alive and they knew that it was a bad battle strategy and they put all their swords out?

Speaker 1 so they're still around. We never saw them die.
That's true. They always said the one thing I know about being thrown, as an expert who's watched the summary twice,

Speaker 1 if you don't see the person die, you can't be sure they're dead. And even when you see them die, you still think they're alive.

Speaker 7 And when they get surrounded by whites, they don't die.

Speaker 2 Right.

Speaker 7 That was what annoyed me the most. Like, the amount of scenes re-watching it when it's like it shows the main character and they literally get surrounded and then it cuts away

Speaker 7 right before they die. They did it with John.

Speaker 1 They get surrounded when?

Speaker 7 By whites. Like when the when the Night King raised all the whites back and then it showed him getting surrounded by whites and then it cut away.

Speaker 1 Yeah, yeah, they get it showed Danny.

Speaker 7 It showed Danny and Jorah like getting surrounded, cut away.

Speaker 1 Are we still talking about Twitter? So many whites. It was like a podcast convention.

Speaker 7 But honestly, I just hope like I...

Speaker 7 My guess for how the episode is going to go is it's going to be like a normal episode and at the end they'll have a cliffhanger like unexpected death that gets you ready for episode five.

Speaker 7 I hope they do something.

Speaker 1 I think that's a really funny gag is if the whites, if they didn't like moan, if they just were all asking to speak to managers.

Speaker 1 They just showed up to Winterfell. They're like, can we speak to your manager? They took out their flip phones.
They're like, you actually should not have a fire here.

Speaker 1 You should not have a barbecue here. Okay, go on, Hank.
Sorry. We're making jokes.

Speaker 7 I know you care about this. Sorry.

Speaker 1 No, I actually care less now. Oh.

Speaker 7 I hope if Arya, like, there's things that they can do to reel me back in, like, bring in Howland Reed, Howland Reed, if they kill Arya or like another main character out of nowhere, that would be great.

Speaker 7 But I just don't think it's going to happen.

Speaker 1 Can I ask you one last question? Yes. Are you still Team Danny?

Speaker 7 I'm Team Targ.

Speaker 1 Stark. Targ.
Targ.

Speaker 7 So you are. Targ.

Speaker 7 Stark Lannister. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Team Targ. You're Team Lannister.
So, wait, a Lannister is the one that always pays their dues, right? Pays their dues. That's the little guy.
And then who else? Cersei Jamie. I'm Team Lannister, but

Speaker 1 Arya's so badass. So she complicates it.
If

Speaker 7 I have to face those men come back and fucking kill her.

Speaker 1 If Gendry and Arya have a kid,

Speaker 1 then I'm probably team that kid because that's a new wrinkle. But yeah, Danny's the worst.
I fucking hate her.

Speaker 1 Khaleesi sucks.

Speaker 1 It's a crazy take. She's going to fight Jon Snow.
She's going to fight Jon Snow. Oh, Hank.
He doesn't think Danny's going to fight Jon Snow. The problem is.

Speaker 1 Oh my God, Hank.

Speaker 1 They're going to get married. They're going to have a kid together.
It's like, you know, relationships getting fancy.

Speaker 1 In Nice, that's a Targaryen way. But what happens when you're going to be a kid?

Speaker 1 you're so wrong, Hank. What happens when Khaleesi, is that her name? Yeah, but Hank, don't say Khalesi.
Denarius. What happens when Khaleesi...
I can't say any name around Hank. I say Daenerys.

Speaker 1 But if she gets defeated, it would stand to reason that they kill her dragons as well. No, it could be Jon Snow's dragon.
He's Targaryen. So he takes both her dragons away from.

Speaker 1 She's fucking anything, yeah.

Speaker 1 You can't ride two dragons at once. Yeah, you do.
Dude, you ever seen a catamaran? No, listen. No, you cannot ride two dragons.
Like, one on each back.

Speaker 1 She's grab a fucking, you know, Mai Tai, hop on that catamaran. A DDM threesome? Yeah, done.

Speaker 1 So you're wrong, Hank. So you might be right, but you're wrong.
They are going to fight. Danny cannot take anyone else outshining her.
Look what happened. Jorah died in the friend zone.

Speaker 1 That fucking poor dude.

Speaker 1 He was like, Jorah definitely went to like Reddit incel after and was like, God damn it, she wouldn't fuck me. Here's my thing.
What the hell? Which is going to prove to be absolutely correct.

Speaker 1 Theon's alive. No.
I like that. Yeah.
I mean, that one makes no sense.

Speaker 1 Well, if you go by my reasoning of if you don't get shot directly in the heart or directly in the brain on a TV show or movie, you end up surviving. It took a spike through his body.

Speaker 1 Through his appendix. You don't even need...
It's right through his body. Did Night King actually perform successful surgery? I'd probably save his life.
Yeah.

Speaker 7 My main take is I need a main or secondary character death before the end of the episode.

Speaker 7 Because you know they're going to end it with a classic like Game of Thrones, cliffhanger, death out of nowhere. Yes.
That's to be expected. I need something.
I need something.

Speaker 1 I need someone to die. What if Bran just accidentally rolls off a cliff? Like he's rolling back.
That would be hilarious.

Speaker 7 There's a chance that they could just be like, all right, see a brand leaveman Winterfell and his story's over.

Speaker 1 They killed the Lord of the Light story.

Speaker 7 They killed the White Walker story. I hope they bring those back somehow.
Like, I hope, like,

Speaker 2 I don't know.

Speaker 1 Either way, I hope they start the next episode. What is it? Five.
Five? Four? And everyone's just like,

Speaker 1 that was a lot. And they just

Speaker 1 have a real moment where they're like, damn. damn, do you see me over there? I was killing all those dead people.

Speaker 1 My prediction for the next episode is going to be pretty calm, but there's going to be one very, very violent moment.

Speaker 7 Okay.

Speaker 1 That's it. So we'll see everyone on Monday.
We'll recap. We'll recap all the NBA action.
I think we have recurring guest Richard Jefferson back on, and maybe a surprise. Love you guys.

Speaker 1 I don't know why.

Speaker 1 Just say I'm staying

Speaker 1 away.

Speaker 1 Today's a matter of days I've got you

Speaker 1 shining away

Speaker 1 the other crazy

Speaker 1 It's Mr.

Speaker 1 I won't say

Speaker 1 so

Speaker 1 a little

Speaker 1 way.

Speaker 1 Silence

Speaker 1 okay.

Speaker 1 Say I'll be

Speaker 1 It's the best to be saved and sorry.