Bonus Bill – Ep. #433

Say hello to the next generation of Zendesk AI agents, built to deliver resolutions for everyone.

Loved by over 10,000 companies, Zendesk AI agents easily deploy in minutes to resolve 30% of interactions instantly.

That's the Zendesk AI Effect.

Find out more at Zendesk.com.

This episode is brought to you by Progressive Insurance.

Fiscally responsible, financial geniuses, monetary magicians.

These are things people say about drivers who switch their car insurance to progressive and save hundreds.

Visit progressive.com to see if you could save.

Progressive Casualty Insurance Company and affiliates.

Potential savings will vary, not available in all states or situations.

Welcome to an HBO podcast from the HBO Late Night Series, Real Time with Bill Ma.

Thank you, folks.

How you doing?

Thank you.

What are you over here?

I'm going to play to this side of the room.

Thank you very much.

Please.

Please, ladies and gentlemen, that's so sweet of you.

Thank you very much.

Please,

sit down.

You're going to need to go back to crouching under your seats.

Because you know what's going on, right?

You know our dear leader

and North Korea's dear leader, they're in a big pissing match.

You heard this?

Trump said, North Korea, this was his quote, best not make any more threats, or they will be met with fire and fury, the likes of which the world has never seen.

Thank you, Dr.

Strangeface.

He is serious about war.

Today he had Ivanka comb his hair into the shape of a helmet.

And you know, people are comparing this to the Cuban Missile Crisis.

It's not really like the Cuban Missile Crisis.

First of all, Kennedy was president, then he was smart.

Now we have not just the stupidest president ever, maybe the stupidest person ever.

I mean,

this would be like the Cuban Missile Crisis after Kennedy got shot in the head.

Oh,

booing into applause.

I love that too.

No, I mean, and, you know, we're the target here in Los Angeles.

It's scary to think that they can deliver a nuclear missile to Los Angeles in a half an hour or it's free.

And definitely not if they take the 405.

That is not.

But yeah, I mean, and what happened, of course, with Trump in there and Kim Jong, the rhetoric is completely out of hand now.

Trump tweeted.

Yesterday, my first order when I got to be president was to renovate and modernize our nuclear arsenal.

Okay,

he asked that it be reviewed.

They just started it.

Nothing has changed.

In other words, it's a giant huge lie.

Or as it's known in the White House, just put it over there with the others.

But yes, of course.

So Trump said, you know, you better not threaten us.

And within three hours, Kim Jong-un said, okay, we're going to blow up Guam.

Right?

He threatened Guam.

Guam, which, if you don't know, is a U.S.

territory.

It's home to 160,000 people, two United States military bases, and now, thanks to President Fire and Fury, a shortage of clean underwear.

And

okay, so then they said that, then we had to respond.

One of the White House nuts, Sebastian Gorka, I didn't even heard of this.

They've got so many nuts, they got new ones every week.

He released a statement.

He said, don't test Donald J.

Trump.

We are not just a superpower, we are a hyperpower.

The fuck does that even mean?

What is a hyperpower?

Is there any member of this administration that doesn't jerk off the Call of Duty?

So North Korea responded to that threat from us.

Then they had to say something back.

And they said Trump's threats are a load of nonsense.

And they said the only way to counter Trump is with absolute force.

By the way, absolute vodka also works.

And then one of North Korea's leading generals, oh,

he went there.

He said that our president, ladies and gentlemen, was like a guy bereft of reason going senile.

Hey!

Yeah.

Okay, we we got it.

No,

Trump was so mad at being called senile that he launched into a 20-minute story about the Electoral College and the time they remodeled the 21 Club and a guy he met at a party on a yacht.

So that's...

I'm not worried because our Secretary of State Rex Tillerson's on the case.

And Rex yesterday said, I think Americans should sleep well at night.

And Dr.

Ben Carson said, just at night?

Oh, that's it.

All right.

Thank you very much.

Catch all new episodes of Real Time with Bill Maher every Friday night at 10, or watch him anytime on HBO On Demand.

For more information, log on to HBO.com.