Episode #364 (Originally aired 9/18/15)

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Welcome to an HBO podcast from the HBO Late Night Series, Real Time with Bill Maher.

Start the clock.

Good afternoon.

Afternoon.

Time will be

real time.

Real, real time.

Hello, everybody.

How are you doing?

Thank you very much.

Thank you.

Awesome,

good.

Thank Thank you, audience.

Please.

Thank you.

Thank you, ladies and gentlemen.

Oh,

thank you.

Thank you.

I.

Thank you very much.

Come on, we got a big show.

We got a big show.

Big show, and I think I.

Great crowds we get now.

We get great crowds, the best.

Well, I think that is what the good news is, that the blush may be off the Trump rose finally.

He's having a bit of a bad week.

Did you see what happened yesterday?

Trump was taking questions at his Klan rally in New Hampshire.

And he learned a very important lesson.

Never give the microphone to a man who thinks Donald Trump should be president.

Because

this guy got up there and he said to Donald Trump, hey, Obama's a Muslim, birth certificate man.

He's not even American, we know that, and the Muslims have training camps here ready to kill us.

What are you going to do about it?

You know, there's been a pet conspiracy theory among the Teabaggers for a long time

that Obama is setting up re-education camps.

I'd like to say tonight, I think he should.

Really,

we need re-education camps.

Because, you know, I try to resist comparisons to Hitler because there's only one Hitler.

He broke them all.

But you know what?

If you're stirring up xenophobic hate among an angry, humiliated population and talking about rounding up minorities, it's a little Hitler-adjacent.

I get it.

And

also at this rally, someone asked Donald Trump if he was going to meet the Pope when he comes here next week.

And Trump goes, Well, the Pope believes in global warming, eye roll.

Yeah, that's when you know the Pope is crazy when he believes in things you can't see, huh?

Well,

no, I mean, nobody at that rally believed in global warming, and less than half of American conservatives, less than half of American conservatives have a favorable opinion of the Pope.

29% think he's a Muslim.

Who is just coming here to have an anchor baby.

So

these are not well-informed people.

I'm just saying.

No, there's a Republican Arizona, Arizona Republican congressman named Paul Gosar, I believe, who said he's not going to attend the Pope speech before Congress because the Pope, he said, has adopted all the socialist talking points.

Yeah, you mean like the New Testament?

He has, that's true.

And finally, in the...

Finally, in the third hour of the debate, yes, the debate was three hours.

I saw at the end, I think I saw, Chris Christie starting to eat his hand.

But in the third hour, CNN finally asked the question about climate change.

Of course, they all blew it off, like, oh, why even talk about that?

They didn't talk about climate change at all, didn't talk about the economy, income inequality.

The whole thing was about how it's important that we have a strong asshole president who everybody hates, whose code name is Hammer of the Gods, who wants to put his wife on the $10 bill.

And you know,

and it's interesting, the debate was held in the Reagan Library, right in front of Air Force One, that Reagan used to fly.

And of course the Reagan Library is their church.

It is.

And like a Christian church, they worship the founder while ignoring everything he ever taught.

Reagan raised taxes, Reagan gave amnesty to Mexican, it doesn't matter.

But the question, that question about what woman would you put on the $10 bill, so important, we had to find that out.

And of course, all these assholes up there, my mother,

my wife, Trump said my daughter.

The obvious answer was Nancy Reagan.

These idiots can't even pander on their feet.

She's sitting right there.

It's like if they said, name a big thing that flies, and they couldn't come up with plane.

So the two leading contenders now are Donald Trump and dr.

Ben Carson.

What an odd couple

Because Trump manic energy and dr.

Ben Carson wow.

I mean

Trump accuses Jeb Bush of having low energy

Next to Ben Carson, he cirqued a soleil.

I mean this

how I do

how do you even go after Dr.

Ben Carson?

It's like debating one of those relaxation tapes of ocean waves.

I kept saying, did Bill Cosby give him something?

But

for once, a Republican debate has emerged with a clear winner.

And it is the woman, Hillary Clinton.

Okay, we've got a great show.

And there's a lot of news and a great people on the panel.

So tonight we're going to forego our first guest and go right to the panel.

Let's meet them right now.

Hey.

And here they are.

Hey.

Hey, dudes.

Hey, this is going to be a fun sausage party, let me tell you.

You all know this guy from sports and business.

He's an entrepreneur, to say the least, one who's made a lot of money, even almost as much as Donald Trump.

And, of course, owner of the Dallas Mavericks.

A great team, the best.

Mark Cupin's over here.

This guy is the former governor of New York.

Two terms, right?

Three terms.

You worked three terms.

That's impressive.

And Republican presidential candidate, please welcome George Pataki.

Governor, how are you doing?

Hey, you.

And, of course, you know this guy, the host of MSNBC's Hardball with Chris Matthews, someone who has never been accused of being low energy.

Chris Matthews.

Remember to follow me on Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram, and send us your questions tonight's special edition of Overtime Overseas so we can answer them after the show on YouTube.

Okay, now, Chris, I was on your show a couple of days ago, and I was tweaking you a little bit about how your network covers Trump too much and his whole speech.

And you said, yeah, but that's because we want to be there for the moment when it all implodes.

My question tonight, with that bad moment at the debate where Carly Fiorina just slapped the bully and this thing with the Muslims yesterday,

Did we have that moment?

We caught him.

Has he peaked?

Well, we caught him because we were doing an audible, trying to figure out whether to stick with him.

And then he said Q and I said, stay with it because we don't know what's going to happen.

And then he comes up with that thing bowing back to the birther thing, the president's not an American, the whole routine.

I said, we're going to go with this.

And then we went back and got a hold of John McCain.

And we showed what he said when the same exact thing happened.

Right.

And we nailed him.

And we're so glad we caught him.

But every night we try to decide.

So it's really all about you.

No, right here it's about you, Bill.

No, it's about trying to figure out when the shtick ends.

And he starts repeating himself.

Then you turn him off.

Every night we got to go audible and that.

I'm excited.

So, Mark Cuban, you're a Trump booster.

You're a supporter.

I don't want to say that, but I like the fact that he's changing politics.

Oh, I thought you were a Trump supporter.

He talks about you like you are.

Well, he's allowed to do that, but I just like the fact that

the political game is no longer the same.

You don't have to be a perfect candidate any longer.

But he's a birther.

Yep.

He's a global warming denier.

Yep.

And he's at least racist adjacent.

I don't,

you're not a global warming denier, and you're not a racist, and you're not a birth there.

How can you like a guy who is all those things?

Because I want to see the political system change.

Period, end of story.

He's not going to win.

He's got no chance.

But someone who is an.

He's got a chance.

He's leading.

I'm told you are, right?

Really?

You think he has no chance?

None.

But as an imperfect candidate

being the leader right now, he opens the door for other imperfect candidates.

Because up until now,

we're becoming exclusive.

There's hope.

We've had hope for the imperfect, right?

I like that.

Well, Governor, now, what do you think about somebody like Donald Trump?

I mean, doesn't his popularity doesn't that explain why you're only getting 1%?

No, I think that Donald Trump, quite simply, is unfit to be president of the United States.

I said that,

I said that, I said that from day one, that his personality, his policies, and yeah, he's changing politics, Mark, but I don't think for the better when you demonize an entire nationality like Mexicans, that to me disqualifies you, unfit.

You asked, has he peaked?

I sure hope so.

But what I heard all the Republican pundits say today is what I've heard really them say all along, which is that Donald Trump doesn't really represent the mainstream Republicans.

He's ruining it for us normal Republicans.

Okay, but there were two polls that came out this week.

They both came up with an interesting number.

It was the same number.

43%

of Republicans think, even still, that Obama is a Muslim.

And here's the really scary one: 43% in a YouGov poll to answer the question: is there any situation in which you could imagine yourself supporting the U.S.

military taking over?

In other words, pro-coup.

43%

pro-coup of any situation.

And I'm guessing the situation is a Muslim president.

Bill, Bill, can I try to defend my party here?

You know, 43%.

You can try.

43%.

I may even succeed.

43% saying he's a Muslim.

If people asked if they thought he was a Martian, they would say probably yes.

And it's simply because there is so much anger towards Obama and his policies.

And I understand that anger.

We have a constitutional democracy.

We have a president who doesn't talk to Congress and says, I'm going to use my pen to change laws.

You don't seem to agree with me.

Well, first of all, if you're talking about...

Neither do you.

When you're talking about signing statements, George Bush did that.

They all do that.

Not like this.

Not like this.

Can I offer a different alternative

interpretation?

Not only do they think he's a Muslim,

60% believe he could well be illegal.

In other words,

he's undocumented.

We have him from another country.

By the way, your guy, your guy.

Trump.

Not my guy.

No, your guy, Trump, says nobody knew him in school.

Now, what's the theory there?

Nobody knew him in school.

school like is he a phantom?

He made up an identity theft.

He made up the whole thing.

Maybe he is from our mind.

No, no, no, no.

I have a theory.

I have a theory why they believe this.

Because they want to believe that their grandkids and their great-grandkids are going to open up history books.

They're not going to have his face among the presidents because he was somehow an asterisk.

He really wasn't president because he snuck into the job.

He was a con artist.

And that's what they're saying.

Listen to what he says about him.

It's a con.

It's a con.

The reason people think that is because they grow up, you've got white, typically white, growing up struggling income inequality, having a hard time getting and advancing where they think they should be.

They look there's an African-American president and they think this can't be true.

There's something wrong here.

I don't believe it's happening.

And then a billionaire says,

and a billionaire comes along and says, okay, you guys don't have a great education.

I went to Wharton, the best school in America.

And I'm telling you, you're true.

You're telling the truth.

So all the guys on Route 40 at the bar at midnight are all going, you know, that guy's a pretty smart guy, you know, and he thinks he's one of the, he thinks he's one of those other guys from Kenya.

Can I ask about that?

Sorry, that's it, Mark.

Let me ask about the debate, Wednesday.

How many did watch the debate?

Did you watch it?

I couldn't stay with the whole three hours, but I watched half of it.

Okay.

So it seemed to me there was just an amazing conspiracy of delusion among the people on that stage because they talked about the world as if it's on fire and America is in the toilet and other countries are killing us.

And the only debate was whether Obama has ruined America on purpose or by accident.

And Trump's slogan, make America great again, they all have a version of that, which is basically we have to restore things the way they were.

Wait, let me read some statistics here.

Jeb Bush, here's a great one.

There's not a place in the world where we're better off today than six and a half years ago.

Okay, you know what?

There are things called facts.

You can actually measure shit.

I know it's not math.

You know, it's true.

I know facts aren't in the Bible, but can't we use them sometimes?

Let me just read the facts to these people who think we have to restore to the time before Obama.

These are facts from Bush's last year to now.

Unemployment, 7.2, now down to 5.1.

No, no, no.

You'll tire yourselves.

Gas price, 324 down to 231.

Percentage of the uninsured, health uninsured, 15% down to 9.2.

Energy independence, we used to import 11 million barrels of oil a day.

Now it's down to 4.5.

Teen pregnancy, 40.2.

Births per thousand, 26.5 now.

Iran, centrifuges, 19,000.

Now they can have under 6,000.

And then GDP growth went up from minus 0.3% to 3.7%.

The Dow Jones, 10,365 to 16,384.

So my question is, we want to restore the old numbers?

No.

No.

Bill, Bill, if I might.

It's like Obama didn't ever exist.

He's the Snapchat president.

It just, all this progress just disappeared.

No, if I can again try to jump in and take the other side here.

If you ask the average American today, they think the best of America is behind us.

This country has always been about.

But these are facts.

No, but let me tell you, well, the Americans are wrong.

I'm not surprised that you think that.

A majority of Americans today don't think their kids will have as good a life as they did.

And that's not what America has been.

But what is more important than America has always been about the future?

What's important?

Facts or what people think.

Facts, of course, matter.

Well, these are the facts.

They are the facts today.

But let me just go through.

Let me go through.

Bill, Bill, let me go through a couple.

Let me go through.

Growth, we have had the slowest recovery from a recession since World War II.

He's shaking his head.

August is

the longest period of time.

But it's been a long time.

In between recessions ever.

Unemployment.

Unemployment, you talked about 5.1.

There are over 6 million Americans working less than 30 hours because their employer can't hire them because of Obamacare.

There are over 6 million

people who have dropped out of the workforce

because they have given up trying to find a job.

The premise wasn't, did America make the world perfect?

That wasn't the premise.

Thank God.

That would be hard to prove.

Not harder than what you're saying.

What I said were facts.

They were facts.

Do you know anybody who has ever left this country to get a job in another country?

Just left, emigrated.

You know who's doing better?

Nobody leaves.

Nobody leaves.

Not many, but people have.

You know who's doing better?

They stay here.

The jobs are here.

People come here.

No one leaves because they can't get a job here.

You know who's doing better?

Republicans.

And this is the great irony.

You guys would be doing cartwheels if you had these numbers.

The Dow was at six

when Bush left.

It's 16 now.

Everybody's about two and a half times as wealthy as we're because this guy's president.

Yes, the wealthy are wealthy.

Yes, and they're the ones that are wrong.

And the wealthy ones bumping on.

And by the way,

did you see the other night that Jeb Bush, he seems like a nice guy, I suppose.

You know,

my brother kept this country safe.

If we had had 9-11 with the Democrats as president, they'd be still blaming us like you'd never forget it.

Ever forget it.

3,000 dead.

3,000 dead in New York.

And by the way, there made about four dead

somewhere in Libya.

But imagine if the Democrats had 3,000 killed under our watch, and the Democrats' watch, they'd have been dead right now.

I couldn't agree with you more.

And not challenged.

The audience all applauded when he said, my brother kept our country safe.

I remember one day when he didn't.

Yeah.

You know,

Bill, I got to jump in here.

Other than that, I got to jump in here.

I don't think that's fair at all.

Oh, no, of course.

He's been president about eight months.

And to say that somehow he is culpable for September 11th is wrong.

You know who's culpable?

Radical Islam and Al-Qaeda.

Okay, what about Hillary?

That's who is somehow blamed for something that happened in Libya in the middle of the night

in an outpost and somehow she killed Chris Stevens.

So government.

Oh yeah.

So

concern there.

So governor.

Are you saying that if Al Gore had been president on 9-11, you Republicans would be saying, let's not blame that on Al Gore.

No, I wouldn't have been saying it.

I would have been saying it, blame it on Al-Qaeda.

There are people who blame it on America because of our support for Israel.

Because of our

not be blamed on America.

First of all, Americans, no, Bill, forgive me, but Americans came together afterwards.

Afterwards, we did.

We put aside partisanship with

demographics.

It wasn't a question of pointing a finger.

It was this person's fault or it was that faith.

I'll tell you who pointed a finger.

It was coming together to get us through that crisis and to stand together as Americans.

That's what we need to do.

Well, yes.

Let me ask you about Condi Rice, who in August pointed a finger.

She said, Al-Qaeda to attack in the United States and gave the memo to the president, handed it to him.

If that had been a Democrat, you guys have been killing him right now.

Obviously.

this is obvious.

Condi right now.

She didn't even know who al-Qaeda was when she took the job.

That's true, too.

But also,

Jeb Bush in the debate, after he said that, my brother kept America safe.

Then he said, don't you remember the rubble?

He said that.

Remember Bush standing on the rubble?

I mean, really?

What about the bubble?

Forget the rubble.

What a bubble you have to be in to see the president standing on rubble and going, there's our finest hour.

When our president, who was in office when this happened, on our watch and he's standing on rubble.

I mean, that's

horrible phraseology.

But I happen to have been there that day.

I was gutted.

Yes, you were.

And the president did rally us, did bring us together.

He gave a great speech at the joint session of Congress.

I don't know who couldn't, but I know who couldn't.

Were you there when he divided the country by going into Iraq?

Were you standing there then?

With the support of Hillary Clinton, by the way.

With the support of Hillary Clinton.

Not with people like

John Kerry after he was against it.

He was for it.

But if I could, all right.

So we're all guilty.

Yeah, exactly.

And we're all Americans and we have a common future and let's try to put this nonsense apart, aside, and figure out solutions to the problems facing our country.

He just said no more Benghazi, no more email discussions.

That's great.

Yay!

No more of that division.

No more division.

Chris, if she's not the nominee, I don't think we have to discuss it anymore.

Look, I'm on your side.

I want there to be more,

well,

not to the degree you're thinking, but, you know, I grew up in New Jersey.

I lived in New York for a while.

I remember when there were East Coast Republicans, when there were moderate Republicans.

I'm telling you,

if the party was different, you would be doing better in it.

You can't do better in it because of the guys who stand up at those town halls and think that Obama's a Muslim.

I disagree.

Right now, it's hard for anybody to get attention because Donald Trump is sucking all the oxygen out of the room.

And plus, you know, what people are forgetting is he's a TV star, a TV personality, like some of the others who may be around here tonight.

And the public saw him.

The public saw him as that, as a reality star, as a TV star.

Now, I would rather have Hillary Clinton president by far than Carly Fiorina.

But fellas, Carly Fiorina, better candidate.

Look better.

Oh, yeah, yeah.

Speaks better, crisper.

I could see why people who don't follow things closely would go, wow.

She's good.

No?

Am I wrong about that?

She's a boardroom politician, it's obvious.

And because of that, she's used to finding a bunch of guys and trying to convince them to do something.

But no one, people said she won, but no one talks about her being presidential.

No one's saying this is someone we would vote for.

Actually, she looked very presidential.

I don't think so.

Except with what came out of her mouth.

Well, yeah, well, yeah, they kind of go hand in hand.

They don't care about that.

They don't care about that.

It's just the presentation.

All right.

Anyway, so Donald Trump, let me, this is really funny.

That guy again, it's always Donald Trump.

Well, you're right.

There are 320 million people in this country.

I know.

But as a comedian, you've got to give me a break.

That's fair.

That is fair.

If you were an ass clown, I'd be talking about you.

Bill, and I might have higher poll numbers, too.

I'm telling you, that's what I'm saying.

You would.

So, a couple of weeks ago, he said, The Art of the Deal is one of the greatest books of all time.

Second to the Bible.

Really, it's the second greatest book of all time.

Not Great Expectations or Huckleberry Finn or The Rise and Fall of the Old English.

Right, Roman Empire.

Okay.

Moby Dick, no.

So then he kind of got himself into this pickle where he has to defend his knowledge of the Bible.

They asked him a couple of weeks ago what his favorite passage was.

He was, I don't like to say, too personal.

They asked him again this week, and he got caught.

He said his favorite passage was from Proverbs, never bend to envy.

And they looked it up, it doesn't exist.

And nothing even close to it.

And Bobby Jindal had a great line.

He said, the reason we know he's never read the Bible, he's not in the Bible.

Well, but see, here's the thing, Bobby Jindal.

He's not in the King James Version.

He's got his own version, as he has the version of everything.

It's the King Trump Bible.

Would you like to hear some passages from the King Trump Bible?

In the beginning, the earth was without form and void.

like Jeb Bush's campaign.

The earth was very low energy.

On her way out of Sodom and Gomorrah, Lot's wife looked back and was turned into a pillar of salt.

But let's face it, she wasn't like a ten anymore.

Job cried out to God, my God, why hast thou forsaken me?

And the Lord said, because you're a loser and your crops are terrible.

It is easier for a camel to pass through the eye of a needle than for a rich man to get into heaven.

I will build a needle so world-class

a herd of camels could get through it and I will make God pay for it.

Blessed are the meek because they're really terrific people and they love me.

The meek are going to inherit so much they're going to get tired of inheriting.

All right.

Let's bring out Jorge.

He is the anchor of Fusions America with Jorge Ramos, who's recently removed from a Donald Trump.

You're right, everything's about Donald Trump press conference.

Jorge Ramos is over here.

Jorge.

How are you, sir?

Great to see you again in person.

Hello, everyone.

Get out, Jorge.

Look at this.

Join our sausage party.

And yes, it is too bad that it's always about Donald Trump.

But, I mean, this guy published your cell phone number.

You must have some bitterness about him.

Well, I take him very seriously.

Very, very seriously.

I think his ideas are very dangerous to our democracy,

to the freedom of the press, and to minorities.

What happened is that after he said that some Mexican immigrants were criminals and rapists, and we know all the studies suggest, all the studies suggest that immigrants have a lower crime rate than those born here in the United States.

So what he's saying is not only wrong, it's false.

Obviously, I wanted just to get an interview with him, as everybody else.

So he gave interviews to most networks.

And I wrote, that was a mistake, I wrote him a handwritten note with my cell phone and I expected him just to answer.

Well, he published my cell phone.

No shame.

And he did with Lindsey Graham, too.

Well, so the lesson is never, ever, ever give your cell phone number to Donald Trump.

So

after a few weeks,

I needed to ask him some questions.

How is he going to deport 11 million?

How is he going to build a 1900 mile wall between Mexico and the United States?

And why is he going to deny citizenship to children born here who are U.S.

citizens just as he is?

So we saw that he was going to give a press conference in Dubuque, Iowa.

Not a lot of people go to Dubuque, Iowa.

And then

I went two hours before.

I sat down and then I waited.

And then on the record, I waited for my turn.

Two reporters asked questions.

Then I said, I have a question on immigration.

Nobody said anything.

He didn't object.

And then when I started expressing the premise of my question, which is that his immigration proposal is full of empty promises, he didn't like the question.

And instead of allowing me to continue, he called a bodyguard and pushed me out of the press conference.

So the other lesson is

you cannot really ask a question with a bodyguard in front of you.

Right.

And you also pointed out that most illegals come here by plane.

And we don't call them illegals.

There's

sorry.

No, no, no.

transgender.

Well,

no human being is illegal.

No human being is illegal.

You're always saying the wrong thing.

But I think words matter.

They're important.

Words matter.

Well, I mean, some people are illegal.

Well, we know.

Why is that a bad word?

Well, because I think it's a double standard.

You don't call illegals

the companies, thousands of companies who hire them, and you don't call illegals the millions of women, including all of you and all of us,

who benefit from the rights.

So it's a double standard.

Right.

That is.

All right.

We should call them all illegals.

We should call them simply what they are.

I agree.

I agree with that.

And also with Ankor Babies.

And by

that, which is U.S.

citizens.

Right.

Right.

Okay.

And I agree with you.

I mean, this is, I mean, you have the facts, but this is only anecdotal about immigrants being less involved in crime.

I notice in my neighborhood the way the Mexicans drive perfectly.

No, really.

Because they don't want to.

We're learning Guatemala said in Mexico City and Tebucigal.

No, because they cannot afford to fuck with law enforcement.

So they drive perfectly, whereas the white people will do anything.

You don't want to get in trouble as an immigrant.

Of course, you don't want to get in trouble.

And that's part of the reason why it is true that we are less likely to be criminals than those born here in the United States.

Those are the facts.

All right.

So you're very tough on Obama about immigration.

But

don't you think that Latinos bear some responsibility?

Because they did not come out to vote in very big numbers in 2014.

They let the Tea Party take over.

And it's the Tea Party who's primarily responsible for why Obama couldn't get his immigration bill passed.

He can't do it as a king.

There is a Congress.

Well, the fact is that Barack Obama had the opportunity to do it in the first year when he was president, and he didn't do it.

That's what he promised, and he didn't deliver.

And he has deported more people than any other president in the history of the United States, 2.4 million.

But excuse me, sir, but there are priorities.

I know this is important, and I agree it's important.

It was not more important than stopping a depression.

It was not more important than giving people.

But he promised that, right?

So if he...

Well, he can't do everything at once.

But then he shouldn't have promised that.

But he promised.

In 2008, in Denver, Colorado, he said in the first year in Office.

He's a politician.

He also promised he'd come on my show to my face twice, and he lied to my face twice, and I let it go.

Okay, so as

we are...

The problems of three little people mount them onto a hill of beans in this world.

So as journalists, we're forced to challenge President Barack Obama and we're forced to challenge the bank.

It's the Republicans in the House that won't take up the Senate bipartisan bill.

Right.

It's because Boehner won't let it come to a vote.

Let's be honest here.

It's not the Democrats.

They want this bill.

The Democrats had the opportunity to replace it.

They wanted.

They had the opportunity.

They were blasted in the Senate.

Those who are black immigration reform right now.

You can't blame the Republicans.

Of course they're to blame right now.

Not to blame.

They're holding up the bill.

The majority of members of the House reported that bill.

Chris, don't yell at my guests.

Right now, Republicans are blocking immigration reform.

about a minute away from having his bodyguard throw you out no it's sorry I don't know

if President Barth Obama at the beginning and Republicans now

okay

and and Republicans always say that you know the the Latinos are our natural constituency because they're very conservative socially but actually the polls show not so much they're pro-gay marriage right

but even on pro-choice

and also control for

right immigration is not even their biggest issue.

Healthcare, education, these are big issues with the Latino population.

Exactly, except when it comes to abortion, only about 44% according to Pew Research Center might say that they

simply don't agree with it.

The fact is that immigration is the prerequisite for many Latinos to see beyond.

It is personal for us.

It is personal.

Half of all the Latino population over 18 years of age is a foreigner.

So when Donald Trump criticizes Latinos, when he criticizes immigrants, he's talking about us.

When he's talking about deporting 11 million people, he's talking about people we know, people I talk to every single day.

How is he going to deport 11 million people?

Right.

That's crazy.

458,333 every single month?

How is he going to do that?

I mean, he's proposing horror, and we've got to challenge him.

Okay, I want to ask another question that's similar, but not about the same ethnic group.

There was a big story this week about a 14-year-old Muslim American teenager in Texas who built a clock.

He's a science kid and that's great.

Can we show the clock?

Okay.

And the people at the school thought it might be a bomb, perhaps because it looks exactly like a fucking bomb.

And I noticed, you know, you were at the debate the other day and Jake Tapper was asking you about ISIS and important questions about terrorism, and he cut you off and said, excuse me, Governor, I have to talk about a 14-year-old who built a clock.

And they did.

And look, this kid deserves an apology, no doubt about it.

They were wrong.

But could we have a little perspective about this?

Did the teacher really do the wrong thing?

Yeah, can I tell you?

Can I tell you?

Because I've talked to the kid.

Go ahead.

Right, he's from Dallas, and I've talked to the people in the school district.

The kid is a super smart kid, science geek.

We talked about science.

But while I'm talking to him on the phone, as I asked him a question, tell me what happened, because I'm curious, right?

His sister

over his shoulder, you could hear, listening to the question, giving him the answer.

So I don't know all the details of what happened, but what I do know, when I talked to him about science, when I talked to him about magnets, when I talked to him about creating things, he was very, very engaged.

He's great.

He's a great kid.

He's a great kid.

No one's doubting that.

What we're at, I'm just asking about perspective.

First of all, the teacher, did she do, she, I don't know, no, no, no, okay, no, but part two to all this.

So I talked to, this is once removed, right?

So I talked to people in Irvine, Texas that worked with people in MacArthur, the school.

And I said, what happened?

What did you hear?

This is, again, secondhand.

He said, the kid, Ahmed, took the clock, put it in the first class.

Teacher said, great, it looks great.

It looks great.

Kid picks it up, takes it to the second class.

Teacher said, okay, whatever, it's great.

It's great.

Ahmed didn't really comment on it from what I heard.

Takes it to the third class.

Same thing.

Then he got to a point, again, secondhand, where one of the teachers, an English teacher apparently, said, look, you've got to put it in your backpack because it's going to make some people nervous and it's making me nervous.

And again, secondhand, he wasn't responsive to it.

So it took six classes before anything happened.

But this would not have happened if

he wasn't Muslim.

No, okay, that's right.

That's all.

We have policies.

Several

controversies precisely because of the color of his skin.

See, I don't think that's because of the skill.

It's not the color of his skin.

Yes, of course.

It's not the color of his skin.

Skin's Excuse me, somebody look me in the eye right here and tell me, over the last 30 years, if so many Muslim, young Muslim men, and he is young, 14, but that's not

never happened before,

hasn't blown a lot of shit up around the world.

And if, and this guy, this kid deserves an apology because he wasn't one of them.

But let me read what somebody said on the Daily Beast.

Dean Obadiah said,

why would a homemade clock get him arrested, you may ask?

Exactly.

I just answered that question.

Because for the last 30 years, it's been one culture that has been blowing shit up over and over again.

I could spend the rest of this year older.

I could spend

well, excuse me, but lots of teenagers around the world have go to join ISIS.

Just a couple in Mississippi a few weeks ago were doing it.

And every time somebody goes to join ISIS, everybody around there says, I can't believe it.

We didn't see it coming.

We didn't see it.

We cannot blame young Muslims around the world.

No, what's the problem?

But no, but all the kids had to do was

It's not, I agree with you, right?

We're making an issue.

Because if a watch like a doctor is like a doctor responsible for

that, no, he was wrong.

He got arrested, but he didn't, all he had to do was talk to the teacher.

He didn't.

Okay.

So that's what he did.

Wait,

let me read the rest of what this person said.

He said, he's talking about the fact that he was from Irving, Texas.

He said, Irving is only 25 minutes from Garland, where the Draw the Prophet Muhammad contest.

remember that a few months ago?

Yes.

Was attacked as it was by ISIS-sympathizing gunmen in May.

The message is clear.

If you are a Muslim,

anything you do might be a plot to destroy America.

No, the message is you can see why they would err on the side of caution.

Absolutely.

Because only 25 miles away, somebody did try to kill people.

I can't believe I agree with you, Bill.

I actually agree.

And by the way, we have zero tolerance in school for things that are suspicious.

And, you know, maybe that doesn't look like a bomb, but it doesn't look like a clock.

And if I'm a teacher.

What if it had been a bomb?

Yeah, exactly.

And so the teacher is supposed to see something that looks like a bomb and go, oh, wait, this just might be my white privilege talking.

Right.

Right.

I sure don't want to be politically incorrect, so I'll just let it go.

You know what the problem is?

In this country, one of the problems we got is this willingness to take sides in a fight like this without knowing what the hell happened.

And it is amazing.

Everybody goes right to their battle stations.

I'm with the minority.

The minority is right.

Those teachers are wrong.

How do you know?

I wasn't there.

You weren't there.

The problem is.

I don't know.

How do you know?

Everybody's an expert.

It's all cartoon.

Everything's a fucking cartoon.

No, the liberals can't argue.

I'm glad you're a 14-year-old.

A 14-year-old was arrested for doing that.

The liberals can't.

How do you know?

It's a film science project, right?

He should not have been arrested, but he should have opened his mouth and had a conversation about it.

He should have said this is not a problem.

He was arrested, and they took him off in cuffs, and then put him in a cage and burned him.

Oh, no, that's ISIS who does that.

No, yeah, we didn't do it.

You know what?

We put a kid after school for a couple of hours.

This is not the end of the world.

But you know what?

The end of the world does happen all over the world

for millions of Muslims who are the victims of other Muslims, of their religion.

Where are the liberals on this?

You You know what?

There's a Saudi who is right now, he was arrested, his name is Ali Muhammad al-Nim,

or

M-N-I-M-R.

I don't know how you pronounce that.

He was arrested for being at an anti-government rally a few years ago.

Today he lost his final legal appeal to not be crucified.

So they're going to crucify him.

Crucify him and then behead him in case the crucifixion didn't work.

So if you haven't used up all your heroism,

hashtagging for the clock kid, maybe do it for this guy.

There he is.

The lack of perspective on this is this.

No, no, no.

I just want to say one thing.

The teachers said something that sounds credible.

They said he wasn't forthcoming.

The kid had a chance to explain himself.

All you'd have to do is explain yourself.

And for whatever reason, just shyness, we don't know what it was.

He wasn't used to that kind of tension.

But he didn't explain it.

Who would have been there to explain this thing?

I don't know.

Okay.

But you know what, Richard, real quick.

You know who the big winner is?

Ahmed.

Because when I talked to him,

he got all the attention, right?

You know, his two hours were taken.

But he told me, look, I've been getting all these offers.

I'm not going back to MacArthur.

I'm going to pick which school I want to go to now because everybody's offering me scholarships.

The kid came out way ahead.

But I would love it if one of the adults who has talked to him would also say to him, you know what, what happened to you was wrong.

But maybe one of the reasons why it happened to you is because in our religion, we were responsible for 9-11, the Madrid bombings, the London bombings, the Bali Discotech bombings, the Kenya mall bombings.

And he's not responsible for that.

He's not.

Of course not.

We're not saying he.

Okay, we've had this discussion long enough.

That's.

Let's move on to another religion.

The Pope is coming here.

We have two practicing Catholics and two ex-Catholics, right?

Yeah.

You and I are both ex-Catholics.

Agnostic, you are?

I think agnostic and atheist are just a matter of semantics, but yeah.

I don't know what you are.

Jewish not practicing.

Jewish.

Jewish.

Jewish.

Jewish.

Cuban.

I thought you were Cuban.

Shabaninski, Kenya.

Okay, so

I read an astounding statistic.

Half the people who are Catholic, who are born Catholic in this country, have quit.

Wait, wait.

However.

This is from Vocative.com.

Among all Catholics in the United States who were raised Catholic, 52% have stopped identifying themselves as Catholic.

11% did return.

But, I mean, any business would see numbers like this as a disaster.

If McDonald's lost half their market share,

it would be a giant...

You're a businessman.

It would be a giant problem.

Something interesting about this Pope is that he defines himself as a sinner.

You can relate to that, right?

We can relate to that.

But what's interesting is a Pope who gives interviews.

No other Pope has done that.

He drives around the Vatican and Rome in a small car, a Ford.

He doesn't wear those ridiculous red shoes that other popes wear.

And he has the decency of saying in a trip coming from Brazil, saying, who am I to judge?

So in terms of style, I think he's a different pope.

However, when it comes to substance, he's against gay marriage.

He's against abortion.

He's against contraceptives.

He's against women becoming priests.

And even though he has zero tolerance for child abuse in the Catholic Church, he hasn't done anything against bishops and cardinals who cover up those crimes.

Right.

Well,

you know, it's...

Baby steps, or baby steps.

But we're moving in the right direction with it.

I never thought I'd see the day when there's a pope that Mel Gibson and the conservatives hate and I like.

Yeah, I do too.

And I think that you're right.

He's not going to change the doctrine in one paper.

See, but a lot of big things have changed.

I like the thing he just did this week about abortions.

And a lot of women have had abortions, have mixed feelings about it.

And maybe it's not guilt, maybe it's all kinds of feelings.

And he said, just go to confession to put it behind you.

Move on.

And that to a lot of people means something.

It does.

And I think the same with people who are married.

Suppose the first husband was a beater.

or drunk or whatever.

And they got out of that marriage and they found themselves in a happy marriage.

They just want to feel like they're part of the community again.

And he says, we're going to find a way to get you back.

Maybe we'll expedite the annulment thing.

And I think these things are compassion.

He's looking out for people.

That's his job.

He's not going to change all the rules.

I think he cares.

He does care.

And if you're a gay guy or you're Jewish, I'll tell you, everybody, you know, so many people I work with are Jewish, and they all like this guy.

They really like him because he's opened the door to everybody.

He's not saying, we're in, you're out.

And it's just a totally different papacy.

He's back to John XXIII, another guy like him.

What about this cognitive dissonance that he was identifying?

That Americans love the Pope like they love their grandpa.

They just don't listen to him.

You know, because, no, I mean, there's polling on this.

I mean, everything the Pope says, don't do it.

I'll tell you who's listening to him the right way.

They don't like his position on the Iranian nuclear deal.

They don't like his position on climate.

He's taken the liberal position.

I mean, Catholics don't obey him.

I mean, Catholics, in overwhelming numbers, get divorced, they masturbate, they have premarital sex,

they have anal sex, sometimes all in one night.

This is not all about you.

No, but I mean there's.

The applause line won't go on when I say that stuff.

There's no applause sign.

There is no applause sign.

Maybe on your show.

But it's going to be interesting because when the Pope comes,

remember, he's 78 and for a reason he has decided not to come to the United States all his life.

So even though he's a Pope that he's going to be like, he's very humble, he's not like Donald Trump,

the fact is that when he criticizes the United States because of the capitalism system and because of the inequality that we are living in in this country, and when he starts speaking American,

as Sarah Phelan says, as Sarah Palin says, in front of the Congress, some people are going to criticize him.

All right.

Thank you, guys.

Time for new rules.

Thank you, audience.

All right.

New rule, the Korean craze MOOC bong, or broadcast eating, where fans watch internet celebrities binge eating huge meals, has to come to America.

Because I think we can beat them at this.

After all, what Koreans call binge eating, we call eating.

New rule, somebody needs to tell the autocorrect in my phone that I often do use the word either and don't want to change it to wither.

In fact, the only time I want to type the word wither is to write, I hope the guy who invented autocorrect lived to see his balls wither and fall.

New Royal racists can't complain that white people aren't reproducing enough until white hipsters get rid of the man bun.

You want to know why Anglo-Saxons aren't procreating?

Meet Patient Zero.

New rules, now that BMW CEO Harold Kruger has fainted while introducing their new line of cars at a Frankfurt Auto Show, I've got to try me some of those cars.

They made a German guy faint.

I didn't even know they could feel.

Either these BMWs are incredible or someone just told this guy his daughter was marrying a Syrian refugee.

New ruler, men who buy Dr.

Nipple.

The pasties for men designed to keep their nipples from showing through their shirt have to admit they just like sticking things on their nipple.

Because

is this really a problem?

In my entire life as a man with nipples, I've never once had to say, hey, my eyes are up here.

And finally, new rule, if authorities in New York are going to continue their crackdown, on Times Square Psychics, an industry that sucks millions of dollars out of gullible people with the vague promise of a better life, they have to answer one question.

How is religion different?

All right, all right, don't worry.

Don't worry.

I'm gonna let you answer that one tonight because tonight's folks is not about religion.

It's about political religion and about how gullible people can be.

Psychics, you know, are not really clairvoyants.

They're con artists who know how to read subtle behavioral clues, like they might correctly guess that you're single and lonely if they go to read your palm and your dick is in it.

And although

fortune-telling is actually protected by the First Amendment, it does raise a moral question, best expressed by a New York detective who was on the case and who asked, is it okay to rob stupid people?

Send your answers to Glenn Beck

at tellmeyyourpinnumber.com.

But you know what happened in New York is the psychics got so greedy it became impossible to ignore.

One psychic took this guy for over $700,000 by telling him that she could deliver to him the woman he loved.

Even though that woman did not love him.

Why didn't she love him?

Because of evil spirits.

The kind psychics know how to get rid of.

Oh, and also one other thing.

At one point, she died.

But not a problem, said the psychic, who told the guy he could still be with her, she'd just be in a different body.

At this point, the guy went to the police and said he was suspicious.

But he kept giving the psychic more money.

This is what experts call the sunk cost fallacy, which means the more you sink money into something, the more you have to believe it.

Even in spite of new evidence that, you know, she's dead, Jim.

Even after the psychic was proven completely wrong, the sucker still had faith in her.

Which brings me to the Republican Party.

I knew that was going.

Now, I'm not saying that Republicans are like psychics, because psychics are right sometimes.

Whereas trickle-down economics has never been right.

And yet Republican voters keep buying into it even though that girlfriend has been dead since the 80s.

And

speaking of dead since the 80s, you may have noticed that Dick Cheney was back in the news last week.

Dick Cheney was back in the news.

That's why you saw the sky sky turn gray and all those crows gathering on the jungle gym.

Yes, Dick was also making predictions about Obama's Iran deal.

Even though about Iraq he had said there is no doubt Saddam has weapons of mass destruction and we will be greeted as liberators.

You have to give it to Republicans.

They have big balls.

They're just not crystal balls.

You think at some point Meet the Press would say, let's stop booking Dick Cheney and get someone more credible, like a bag of fortune cookies.

Is invading Iraq a good idea?

Better to press shirt than to press luck.

There, I just saved us $4 trillion.

I mean, it goes on and on.

During the last election, Mitt Romney said, if President Obama is re-elected, you will not be able to get a job.

But unemployment is now lower than it ever was under Reagan.

It's Romney who can't get a job.

Mitt also said, if we bailed out the car companies, you can kiss the American automotive industry goodbye.

But we did bail them out, and it's doing better than ever.

Donald Trump said Obamacare would be a job killer, but it didn't kill jobs.

It didn't result in death panels.

It didn't bankrupt the states.

It didn't bankrupt the nation.

It didn't bankrupt Medicare.

It didn't bankrupt the insurance industry.

Here's what actually happened: the insurance companies got richer, some black kids got inhalers, and John Boehner had to pay more taxes on his tan.

Or how about Newt Gingrich in 2012 saying if you want $10 a gallon gasoline, Barack Obama should be your candidate?

Or the NRA president saying a re-elected Obama would erase the Second Amendment from the Bill of Rights.

Or Rick Santorum warning that if gay marriage became the law of the land, our country will fall.

You know, for a party that's so anti-gay, they sure pull a lot of stuff out of their ass.

All right, that's our show.

I'll be at the Embassy in Fort Wayne, Indiana tomorrow, September 19th, at the Wharton and East Lansing, Michigan, October 10th.

Oh, I'll be in New York at Madison Square Garden, November 14th.

I want to thank my guests, Mark Cuban, George Bataki, Chris Matthews, Jorge Ramos.

Join us down for Overtime Overseas on YouTube.

Good night.

Thank you.

Catch all new episodes of Real Time with Bill Maher every Friday night at 11 or watch him anytime on HBO On Demand.

For more info, log on to HBO.com.