The Adam Friedland Show Podcast - Nathan Macintosh - Episode 66

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But they remade it, right?

Russell Brand, yeah.

Ridiculous.

I have no problem.

Okay, so the deal was he was just like 5-2, but like got a lot of pussy or something?

I don't know if he got a lot of pussy.

I think that was Dudley Moore's thing, was that he was 5'2 and he got a lot of pussy.

He himself or in the movie Arthur?

I think he was a sex symbol.

He was in the movie 10 as well with Bo Derrick.

I've seen neither of those movies.

That's the one with the girl.

She has core and rose.

Yeah.

A white, a white girl.

Boderic, yeah.

You know a lot more about Dudley Moore than I do, and I've seen one of his movies.

You saw Arthur.

I saw Arthur.

Right.

And

his sister is like a bitch to him.

In the movie?

I thought he's like an Aardvark, and he's like trying his best at school, but his sister

DW fucks things up for him.

That's the cartoon version, but the live-action version, it was a different thing.

So that's like the Batman the Animated series, and then that's like, you're talking about the Dark Knight version.

Well, you're, yeah, and you're kind of referencing like almost like Arthur Beyond.

Oh, okay.

You know what I mean?

Oh, yeah, yeah.

The Spider-Verse kind of version.

Yeah, it's a Spider-Verse type of thing.

So Dudley Moore was Arthur, but before Aardvark, it's like before.

I think, you know, now I'm thinking of it, I think it might have been his journey to Aardvark in the movie.

What happens?

He gets drunk and he meets Liza Minelli, and I think she has powers.

I might be fucking this up, but she.

And she's a 10 out of 10 in this.

I'd say 11, honestly.

When I was a kid.

Oh, yeah, absolutely.

When I was like eight, nine, that's.

Lies Minelli.

For me, yeah.

You're homosexual?

I was.

That's like, if you're like a gay icon, you have a career until you're dead.

Yes.

They never leave.

No, yeah.

They are the most ride-or-die fan base you could have.

Yeah,

I'm not in there.

I'll die.

You're going to die.

What?

They'll let me die, is what I'm saying.

I'm not in that.

I'm not going to be on the cruise ship in 30 years with Cindy Lauper, is what I'm saying.

Oh, when you said let me die, I thought about the AIDS crisis in the 1980s, and the government knew it was happening.

Did they know?

Well, this is another theme of Arthur.

Really?

He means.

So he's in Greenwich Village.

He's in Greenwich Village.

He's in a limo.

He's cruising.

Cruising.

Yeah.

For, I don't know if it's.

We don't get to that point.

Okay, is this the baby version cartoon or the

more real?

Okay, so there's a little bit more raw.

Yes.

You see penetration.

You see penetration, soft stroking.

The cartoon is kind of more softcore version of Arthur.

100%.

It starts on penetration, Arthur.

Really?

Yeah, and that song

Christopher Cross is playing.

When you get lost between the moon and New York City.

And in the movie, you haven't really seen it, but Arthur, this guy's ass cheek is New York, and

this side is the moon.

Yeah.

You know, originally.

It was when you get caught between the moon and New York City.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

But they got it.

And then they were like, the Jews that run Hollywood were like, come on, we can't.

We want to put this on the radio.

We can't, yeah, caught, caught.

This is a family hot quote gay pornography film.

We can't say cock in the song.

Have a little click.

GHT, please.

Yeah, GHT.

So he's cruising.

Well, after he pounds the man, then he's cruising.

Oh, it's a pound job.

He's pound.

He does the power job.

Okay, because sometimes it could be a power bottom, and the bottom could be pounding you.

no no so he's an active top and that's why the movie is a dom daddy yeah because he's 5'2 and you think he's gonna be pounded because he's such a small little you can just grab him and fuck him type guy but not dudley more he's so drunk he has like you know what i mean it's like when you see a little dog fucking a bigger dog yeah whatever yeah like like a chihuahua fucking like a pit bull or something yes he's he's uh so anyway he pounds the guy he pounds the guy and he comes and that's a that's a scene that lasts about three minutes he comes or the his lover comes first.

He comes.

He doesn't even care.

He can't care.

He's

a work.

He's got a limo waiting outside.

Yeah.

Okay, because my lover comes first.

But

if you have a limo outside waiting for you, you can't wait for the other guy to come.

Yeah, yeah.

It's you.

The guy's on a clock.

So he comes home.

Kennedy style.

Yeah.

He comes hard, and it's a pretty long scene.

What would you define hard coming from?

I mean, he gets pushed back into a wall.

He screams.

Oh, he does a Tennessee pile driver.

I think that's a good idea.

You know what that is?

You're fucking on a drywall wall, and then you smash your lover through the wall.

I've never heard of that.

But I've never heard of that.

Just Tennessee?

Because there's drywall everywhere.

That's vanilla.

No, no, no.

Sometimes you could have a kind of a more of a...

What is a...

What's a

sheetrock?

But that is drywall.

Oh, you're thinking of plaster.

Plaster?

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

That's true.

Yeah, if you're in Italy, you can't be like smashing through a wall because they're not using this American crap, you know, construction techniques, you know?

I was going to say, yeah, they made it so that you couldn't pound right through the wall because people were before they did those walls pounding right through the wall.

Because they had the Romans.

So

he comes hard.

He hits the wall.

He kind of hits his head, too, and he says, ow, but he's still coming very, like, it's hard.

It's a lot.

He covers the guy.

And it's cool because you have like the shape of the gay sex in the, like, the, like the Kool-Aid man runs through a door, and then you have the Kool-Aid man shape yeah but you have him doing the Patrick Bateman muscles his lover

you know in excruciating pain yeah he really fucked him and he also it's like dented like this like he's like ow it holds his head and for the guy that he pounded it's pretty good because now he has forget a phone number you have the guy that fucked you imprinted on your wall for life yeah it's kind of a Cinderella yeah yeah

so he

he comes and then he goes right back downstairs to the limo where the guy's been like come on man this is really getting insane.

Yeah, that's when the Christopher Cross song ends.

Okay, and now he's cruising.

Now he's cruising.

Now he's cruising.

And from what I remember, man, I saw this movie as a kid, but

so he gets in the car.

I'm on the edge of my seat, you know.

He gets in the car and he's driving.

And Liza Minelli, do you ever see the movie Thinner?

What is that?

It's like a

pro-anorexic style.

Kind of.

It's crazy that gay gay guys tell women, they're like, don't eat.

And they listen to gay guys.

Women really like.

Why don't they listen to us?

What we say is

massive tits, massive ass.

But they want to listen to gay guys saying,

you know, just go to the hospital for not eating.

Yeah, I think, well, one,

there's

gay guys want them to do that to be like a hanger, right?

Just for like clothes, just to like show off.

clothes.

So in a gay guy's closet, they just have anorexic women just wearing their clothes.

Yes.

Yeah.

Or a woman's clothes to just see what it looks like on a runway or whatever.

Is a hanger a gay term?

Hang on.

I thought it was a hag.

Hang.

Oh, a hanger, like a cloth.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

But it could be, I don't know.

I don't know where the term came from.

Hanger is, it's got a

checkered history.

I think so.

Clothing holder is what I.

I won't even say hanger.

Because hanger also

implies the abortion ban, Roevie Way.

You know, you don't want to go there.

That's true.

Yeah.

You can't, you can only do that with like an old school hanger, though.

Those wooden ones, you can't fucking, you're going to kill yourself with also when it comes to hangers, you think Johnny Drama, your brother's the star, but you're living in the mansion.

You're also getting pussy.

You're arguing with turtle.

You know, like, why don't you start, you know, get your career back?

I, I.

Hanging.

I think maybe s women think too that straight men dislike them more than gay men, but I think gay men dislike them more than straight men.

They, I think gay men are like, let's see how many women we could kill.

Yes.

I think if we were on an island, if it was you and me on an island and

a gay guy could hang out with all of the women or us, he's coming over here and we're going to tell him about, you know,

Arthur.

Yeah, we're just trying to talk about movies.

So he's cruising.

The conversations that we have are so much better than whatever the fuck they're talking about.

Yeah, I don't know what's going on over there.

Wildness.

Useless.

Yeah, Brad.

Yeah, oh, God.

I love to be on a jet.

Who doesn't want to be on a a jet?

On a jet.

You know what I mean?

Yeah, they say the most.

What are you, first grade?

Everyone knows that.

Thinner might have been about anorexia, but there's an

actually, wait, fuck.

What was thinner?

No, you're right.

It is kind of.

Oh, no, it's a someone gets cursed and he keeps losing weight.

Okay, yeah, I remember that.

But he keeps getting fucking thinner.

But who's this Kevin Bacon?

No.

I think it might have been Kevin Bacon.

Do you know what his original name was, by the way?

Francis Bacon.

Yeah.

Yes.

Not a lot of people know that.

So I just, you know.

But he's driving.

Don't know.

It's Kevin

Hirschkovitz, but he's like, you can never be in this industry as a Jewish person.

There's never been a Jew in show business.

What's the least Jewish name?

Bacon.

The exact opposite.

It's the exact opposite.

Bacon.

Kevin Haram.

Kevin Shirielo.

Bacon.

Bacon.

It's bacon.

I got to drop this whole image I have.

What can I do?

Buddy, call yourself pork pork bacon.

One of Nick's favorite things is that there is a fat actor named Jonathan Candy.

Oh.

Yeah, yeah.

A little on the nose.

From Canada.

From the.

Well, he was the bottom in the Dudley Moore, the opening scene.

I fucking forgot that.

It was one of his first roles.

It was one of his first roles.

And he was funny in that scene, too.

It was funny.

He was pretty funny.

When he gets the cum right in his face, because the thing is.

When he's smashing through that wall, he's got that 5'2'2 chihuahua on the back of him.

And he makes the chihuahua noises.

You really really got to watch this movie.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

The beginning is insane.

But, John, America likes to make fun of Canadians.

And so that's what they did.

They said, look, we'll put you in a lot of movies and stuff.

But, John, your first one's going to be tough.

You're pounded in the ass by that guy.

But it's a foot in the door.

It's a lot of things in the door.

It's an ass in the door.

It's your balls in the door.

Your whole

dick was shown fully.

It's a erect and soft, which I thought was pretty rough.

It's a foot in the door.

It's a body through the wall.

Yes.

That's what they used to say in the 80s.

That was kind of an old, like golden era Hollywood

body through the wall.

A body through the wall.

It's a comedy.

It's shot right in the eyes.

You're going to get Tennessee pile driven.

Yeah.

And it's like, I'm Canadian.

I don't know.

I don't know.

Where is Tennessee?

Tennessee.

You're the only Tennessee.

Yeah, they show it to him on a map.

He's like, I still don't know.

And I'm like, look, bend over.

Here's Dudley Moore.

Because, like you said, it was full penetration.

I can't believe I saw this actually.

You remember the trailer?

They were like, Arthur, this time, fucking for real in a movie.

Yeah, yeah.

Yeah, because

they showed it.

They've taped or they filmed Arthur, and then they showed it to test audiences, and they were just like, I don't buy it because

why is he with Liza Manelli if he's not penetrating men?

I don't get it.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

They didn't understand.

Yeah, like only a man who traffics in rough trade gay sex would be with Liza Manelli.

Yeah.

So then they went and they told Dudley Moore, and he's drunk, and they go, Look, man, we got to reshoot the first five to ten minutes, and you're going to have to really get into John Candy.

And John Candy said, what?

Because they didn't, they let it all like, they kept it a secret until they got to the set that day.

And he's like,

I didn't sign up for them.

They slapped him.

Yeah, yeah.

You know what I mean?

And like his name, Candy blew out of his fucking face.

And then they went, they reshot it.

The Jews were like, take this pill.

You need it.

You're exhausted.

You know,

he was in his dressing gown.

He's like, I can't perform today.

Yes, yes.

I've been through enough.

Yes.

Well, the flight alone.

From Canada.

Yeah, it's long.

And you got to go through security.

And I mean, he was already kind of assaulted.

And then he's going to be assaulted again.

He just wasn't ready.

They felt him up.

They grabbed him.

Back in the 80s, they used to give you

the Michigan screwdriver at the

border.

You had to blow three or four border guards.

And depending on how fast you made them come, you get in or not.

And

they call them the three tenors of the Michigan screwdriver.

It was Kid Rock, Eminem, Gretchen

Whitworth.

Yes.

Yes, I believe.

You have to go down on all these.

Those were kind of the three amigos of the pillars.

The pillars.

The

pillars of American security.

The triumvirate.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Yeah.

The guardians.

The guardians of the

galaxy.

They put it in quotes.

And they go, hey, here's my passport.

That was before all that.

Crap.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Your passport.

Here's your passport and put it into your mouth.

So, anyways, he had done that.

And so they reshot the whole thing.

And again, so Arthur is

driving in the limo.

He's driving his own limo.

No, he's not driving his own limo.

That was Arthur 2.

He lost it all.

He's like, I got to drive my own limo.

Now this is pathetic.

He picks a chick up in the limo.

i'm so tired from pounding john candy in the ass he's like

there's cum all over the place he didn't have time to grab his fucking cumber bun he's back down so let's go back he's cruising in this limo okay

you're setting this the scene yes but he's in the back trunk okay yeah and and no cum in him gone and that's kind of one of the things he's complaining about in the limo He's like,

my bag is dry.

He's feeling it, but it's not really there because it's so deflated.

It's like a bike, you know, a a bike that's been in a garage for a long time.

I hate that.

I hate that.

Yeah, and there's no pump or anything because the pump's only for the dick.

It's not for the ball.

Because they're doing all the science for this fucking COVID crap, but they're not trying to get you more cum.

Yes.

What happened to men?

What did happen to men?

What happened to men?

You're on to something because I think when your balls are empty, there should be a little mask that you're able to put over them to let other people know that there's nothing in there.

Do you know what I mean?

Exactly, because everyone's trying to go for it.

And the mask is like, hey, don't bother me.

I'm dry.

No bueno.

No bueno.

I got nothing down here, pal.

Yeah, because Mexican guys are constantly.

Yeah,

constantly.

Yeah.

This is the McDonald's milkshake machine.

It doesn't work.

So he's in the.

He's cruising.

He's cruising.

He's cruising and he's telling the legs.

Which is his style of cruising.

It's a different style because a lot of people, when they think cruising, they think

a public restroom.

Yes.

But

a lot of people might not know this.

It's also

a man in limousine.

Oh, yeah.

Another style of cruising.

Yeah, that was part of that.

Was the early part of the 80s.

That's how it was.

If you saw a limo, you knew.

You knew.

This guy's going to ask me for something.

Monopoly man.

There's a Monopoly Man style guy, finger in the butt.

100%.

Finger in the butt.

If you were out at night, nobody was ever scared of gangs or violence.

It was Limos.

Crime was at a zero rate.

Zero.

Besides cruising.

Cruising.

Sexual assaults assaults were all the way up.

I mean, whatever the top is,

you know, it was at the top of the dick because

that's how they used to measure it, too.

If the dick was softer, sexual assaults are down.

Remember on the news?

And then when it was rock hard, level - I think I saw that at Anderson Cooper.

I think he was talking about it.

Yeah, that's how he used to gauge it.

So when it was up, when they showed you a hard dick on CNN, you knew, oh man, I can't go outside today because a guy's going to fuck me.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

So he's in the movie, he's cruising.

And he's yelling at the limo limo driver.

That's true.

We were just in fear, but the media was putting that in our minds.

Yes.

Right.

We had Wolf Blitzer being like, here's a picture of a hard dick.

And then we were in our homes just shaking.

Yeah.

Is there a limo outside?

Yeah.

Is there a limo outside?

That's how they fuck, like, they really control.

I know.

You know, I know.

So people.

People were scared to go to Vegas.

There's a lot of limos there, you know.

And from there.

Proms were canceled because people were renting limos.

And they're like, I can't do that anymore because somebody's going to, there's going to be a dick in there that wants to fucking

fuck me or whatever.

That happened in my prom date, actually.

In your limo?

Well, she had sex with another guy, but

I don't know if it was in the limo or afterwards.

Gotcha.

Tennessee Pile driver?

You don't know.

No, she got the she got the,

what do you call it?

The

Darwin.

Oh, my God.

He's in a tree and he comes on her?

No, he inserts his soft penis in her mouth and then it evolves and chokes

and kills her.

And then he says, Survival of the fittest, bitch.

Yells Galapagos, and then leaves.

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So we're in the limo, right?

We're in the limo.

Okay.

And he is complaining to the driver about his lack of come now.

His balls are flat.

Like Christopher Lloyd when he gets run over in Who Framed Roger Rabbit.

They're down there.

So the driver's like, I don't know what you want me to do, man.

I'm just driving.

And then Liza Minnelli jumps in front of the limo and she's hit and she rolls over the top in another long scene.

I know.

I hate, like, don't you hate it when you kill a woman or you think you killed a woman?

Yeah, it depends.

I mean, there's some times where you go, no, that was justified.

But then there is some times where you go, no, I didn't need to go that far.

I hate, yeah, it's just so, ugh.

You know what I mean?

But what a, just like a party pal.

It's pretty bad, yeah.

You get a couple women in your house, and one accidentally ends up in a fucking garage with the door closed and the car running, and you go, I just, it was a gag.

I thought it was going to last for like a couple minutes.

I didn't know it was going to last.

Yeah, she wanted that.

She wanted that officer.

She wanted that.

She told me, can you please choke me?

And I I said, Yeah, but she meant like the other way, and I put her in the garage.

I asked her father before, you know, I got permission.

Definitely call her dad and be like, Hey, does your how does your daughter come?

Listen, I'm a fucking gentleman.

I'm gonna call her dad before I do the garage of carbon monoxide pollution.

Yes, yeah, yeah.

And he was like, The only way she can come, and I don't even know how I know this.

I'm her dad, but a GPU.

A father knows, a father knows.

You're right.

A father can look at his daughter and 100%.

And it's not nasty.

It's not from him.

We're not blue comics, okay?

But

a father knows.

He's like, My daughter

is very slut.

A father sees his daughter.

My father's a whore.

Yes.

My daughter's a whore.

My daughter's a whore.

My father's a whore.

My father was a whore.

Yeah.

Fuck.

I know.

I know.

So he, so Eliza Manali role.

Gigalo, only hot chicks.

My dad?

Both of our dads.

Yeah.

Yeah, MILFs.

But MILF's in a small town, so it's a different kind of hot.

Yeah, MILF's in a small town.

It's like a MILF's in a small town, which is a country song.

I love that song.

I was going to say, I I love that song.

MILF's in a small town.

Try fucking that in a small town.

Yep.

She's 250 pounds.

Nine kids.

She got a haircut that's kind of like a guy now.

By a DeWalt drill.

But the pussy's still good.

They say 50 years old is the sexual peak.

How does that make any fucking sense?

That's definitely a lie that women say to make themselves feel better about

their biological.

Anyway,

so back to the song falls apart at that point.

Yeah, yeah.

You know, it's funny.

He should have finished this off.

I know.

He should have finished this off.

Anytime I hear it on the radio, I'm like, just talk about how you met her in a Dollar General parking lot.

And, you know what I mean?

Go into it.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Like, we're here.

We're ready for the romance.

Yeah, she's like, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.

Biological bird.

You're infertile, but your sexual peak is 50.

Yeah, bitch, I believe that shit.

Whatever.

I could have a kid at 85 years old.

Look at fucking Baron.

He's 6'11.

We gotta put that guy in the NBA and show those.

Anyway, anyway, let's go back to.

I've heard that.

It gets kind of rare.

I haven't heard the uncensored version.

I haven't heard the.

Really?

But either way.

I would never.

I would never.

No, not you.

I'm talking about.

I don't know who sings that song, Luke, Luke, Luke, Luke Taylor, I think his name is.

Luke Taylor.

Coach Taylor, Coach Taylor.

You're fucking, yeah, no, you're

Liza Minelli rolls over the hood, right?

She's rolling down the entire limo.

That's funny.

It's kind of like a naked gun gag.

It's like

it's horrific and then it keeps going.

Yeah, because like when Homer falls off that cliff,

ow, ow, yeah, yeah, or like when the chicken fought Peter Griffin in

Family Guy, they just kept fighting.

That's such a funny thing.

She gets caught in the sunroof

and

Dudley Moore opens the sunroof and she falls in.

What a clap.

It's a meet cute.

We've all seen romantic comedies that's a meet cute.

It's like when the girl's carrying too many things and she drops them and the guy's like, can I help you pick them up?

And she's like,

I'm retarded.

You know, like, whatever.

Yeah, yeah.

Or like when a woman's in a garage with a running Jeep Wrangler and she's like, hey, I've...

I don't think I'm going to come.

I'm going to die.

And then a guy from

the party runs in and he goes, oh, my God.

And then they meet that one.

She saves her life from being, you know, jeeped.

It's a Jeep Q.

It's a Jeep Q.

Jeep Q.

That's a good name for a title.

Jeep Q.

Jeep Q could be a movie.

100%.

I mean, come on.

Met on the set of that new movie.

Jeep Q.

Yeah, Jeep Q.

Yeah, a girl's committing suicide.

No, she's not.

She's manipulated into the...

Someone's framing her for suicide.

Somebody, they got it into her.

Look, she wants to be choked during sex.

And this guy goes, the ultimate choke is monoxide.

So he puts her in the garage after fucking her for a little bit.

He's like, I'll be back.

And then she, you know, slowly starts.

But then there's the hero.

That guy's the other guy.

The hero, he's like kind of a little bit of a slacker, kind of trying to get his stuff together, his shit together.

He's on the wrong side of 30, still smoking bongs.

Yeah.

It's like, and he's walking around.

He's like, oh, God, I need to get my shit together.

Will I ever find love, dude?

Like, I don't have a place in this world.

You know, I've been a gigolo for for years.

You've been a giggolo forever.

I recorded that country song that didn't go anywhere.

I did that country.

Yeah, it really didn't.

It fell right off.

I should have finished it.

Couch Taylor stole that country song from me.

I lost my masters.

Yeah, try fucking that in a small town.

Didn't work.

You know, in Nashville, what they call it, they call it massels.

What?

Instead of your masters for your...

Yeah, yeah.

Oh, oh, the tea's gone.

Yeah, they say it in like a kind of a slip.

Which is back to your point about men.

The tea is gone.

What happened to men?

The tea's gone.

What happened?

The tea is gone.

Yeah, yeah.

And men used to have tea.

They used to be gossiping left and right.

Yes.

Yeah, yeah.

There's no tea anymore.

Seriously, you talk to a guy.

That used to be

a whole tea.

His tea levels are so low that he has no gossip.

I'm not understanding what's going on.

And you just go, buddy, raise your tea levels.

Come on.

Get the hats.

Get fucking alpha breaks.

It's our little secret.

Yeah, man.

Get the tea, bro.

Yeah.

Take fucking whatever it is.

Donald Trump wants to bring gossip back.

Yes.

He is actually.

I think he goes.

He's such a gossip.

I think he gossips.

He has to be the biggest gossip.

Sure.

I think if you are Rena for two seconds, you know everything about America.

Yeah.

That he knows.

You know what?

His friends, he does it in like a kind of like when gay guys are close with like other gay guys, they were like, oh, she's at it again.

You know, his friends.

He says everybody's she.

Yeah, he does the she.

His sons.

Yeah, yeah.

Eric.

Yeah, Eric.

What does she do?

Oh, my God.

Look at her.

He knows Eric's a whore too because his dads also know their sons.

She knows how he likes to come.

Exactly.

When you watch your two kids eat popsicles, you know exactly what makes them, it's going to make them tick.

So Liza Minnelli, he opens the fucking thing and Liza Minelli falls through the thing.

And she's like, how could you possibly hit me?

And she goes, and he's like,

I'm drunk, and it was my driver.

And she's illegal.

What's with your balls?

Because, you know, like, they're so dry.

They're so dry.

And he goes, and then she,

this is where she uses her magic.

And then he goes, I wish I had a mask, like a surgical mask for these.

Yeah, just little.

What the hell happened?

Yeah, what the hell happened to me?

What happened to Matt?

And

she does that little thing like from Big Trouble, Little China, the Raiden.

Oh, I thought you were going to say

the accent.

She does the accent.

No, the driver starts doing that, though, because he's so scared about hitting a person that he becomes a different ethnicity just to try to get out of it.

He's the magic Chinese guy from Big Trouble.

Yeah, what was his name, by the way, the guy in that movie?

Not Raiden.

Mortal Kombat just completely stole this.

But what's the guy's name?

I don't remember either.

Wang Chung?

Was it Wang Chung?

Or is that music?

Wang Chi.

Everybody Wang Chi tonight.

Everybody Wang Chi tonight.

I was making that up.

That's close.

So she's doing the Raiden powers.

Trying to get.

Eliza has electricity.

Yeah.

So she's doing the Raiden powers.

And gay guys are like, that is fabulous.

That's amazing.

She's fab.

Because I wish I could do it.

I just want to zap a guy.

Yeah, I wore a scorpion to get over here at least.

Oh, my God.

If you could just shoot the

hook.

I wish I could do that to Broads.

Oh, 100%.

In a real meat market bar.

Yeah, yeah.

I know.

I knew you made.

You don't got to tell me.

Pick up spot.

I have the whole yellow ninja suit.

And I go into bars like that sometimes, and I'll tell them to come over here, but I don't have the hook.

Yeah, you pantomime get over here to a girl before they're even talking to her.

They don't like that.

Yeah, just they don't like it.

They don't like it.

When you see the girl across the bar, you just go, get over, get over here.

And up in my face, I have the full suit on with the mask.

She's 21.

She goes to NYU.

She does not get the Mortal Kombat.

She's never heard of Mortal Kombat.

Fatality.

And she's like, I'm calling the police.

I'm calling the police.

Yeah, yeah.

And you're like, you're so...

Stop flirting.

Stop flirting.

Yeah, stop flirting.

Yeah, I wonder if Mortal Kombat, was that a romantic comedy?

If we're thinking about it now, because

Scorpion fights Cyndell, and Sindell has her tits out, and he's saying, get over here, which is like...

That's that's that's those are fuck words.

Get over here.

Get over here.

For what?

For what?

To fuck.

And then we're not doing taxes.

If you demand somebody with their tits out to get over here.

Get over here.

Yeah.

You don't want them to write you a parking ticket.

You want to unleash your business inside of them.

You want to shoot out with

kind of a hook kind of.

It's like a spear.

It's very dangerous.

It's like a harpoon or something.

It really is a harpoon.

Yeah.

He was a whaler.

Scorpion.

Yeah.

He was out from Montauk, Tip of Long Island.

That's where they found him.

He was in Earthrealm on the end of Montauk, wailing.

Wailing.

And he had a scorpion tattoo.

And then he gets

bit

by

Moby Dick.

Yeah.

Because that's the ultimate whale.

And he's like, I'm a whaler.

I'm a whaler.

I'm best friends with Bob Marley.

Yes, yes, yes.

And then Shang Sarah.

I'm from Trenchtown.

Yes.

He has a lot of that.

He has no vitamin C.

He hasn't eaten an orange.

So he has a lot of scurvy.

Exactly.

And that's kind of why they cover his face because it's so sunken fucked up.

Those whalers are fucking idiots.

They're disgusting.

Just have an orange.

Yeah, just have an orange.

Just have an orange.

Step, your whole face is a fucking salt-filled fucking mutation, man.

Yeah, and get some chicks on the boat, you know?

Yeah, bro.

Oh, guys.

This is the difference between.

And they're eating gruel.

They're eating gruel.

This is the difference between a whaling ship and a yacht.

One has tits.

One has tits.

And that's actually what the name of my

name of my boat.

So she's doing this.

The name of your boat is that's the difference between

one has tits.

Dot, dot, dot.

One has tits.

Yeah, that's the difference between the two.

It's a long name.

Yeah, yeah.

It's kind of written around the entire boat.

And I should say.

It has a maple leaf.

Like, you have to have the flag of the country of origin of a boat, right?

I have the Nova Scotia flag on it.

What's the Nova Scotia?

What do you have on it?

The Nova Scotia flag is a lobster smoking a cigarette.

Really?

Yeah, it's pretty cool.

It's kind of retarded.

Why?

Why?

What the why?

No one's going to respect that.

They're like, okay,

good bit, dude.

Do you know that a lobster can't?

How the fuck does a lobster smoke a cigarette?

It's underwater.

Oh, okay.

So cartoon people.

She does this.

It's a serious flag.

It's a serious flag.

No, it's not a serious flag.

How the fuck is it not a serious flag?

The Mexican flag is a goddamn eagle eating

a snake on a cactus.

That's fucking badass.

But a lobster smoking a cigarette is bad.

Yeah, that's cartoon.

You don't even have.

America doesn't even have.

What do they got?

Stars?

Stars and bars, baby.

Stars?

Stars and bars.

Stars?

Okay, first of all, we let you come here.

What are we going to call stars?

Liza Minelli?

What?

You're back.

Thank you.

First of all, listen.

You know, the 50 first star,

the stars at first were celebrities?

It's true.

It was 50 stars.

It was 50.

It was Liza Minelli, Rock Hudson.

George Washington.

George Washington.

He was a star, but like juiced in.

He had like a fucking, you know what I mean?

Juiced in for what?

Yeah, you're a star.

Tell me his dad's name.

No one knows.

Dr.

Washington.

I knew that.

Professor Washington.

Yeah, he invented wooden teeth.

Yeah, he did.

Yeah.

Really?

He saw wood, and he looked at his mouth, and went, I could probably put that here.

I don't like that people talk about our president, the father of our country's teeth.

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So, so lies and only falls through the roof.

Yeah, I think we might get an award for this or something.

The guy, a peabody?

No, I think it's called like a...

A D-body.

I don't know.

It's like a

potty.

Potty.

Oh, a potty.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

A potty.

Yeah, yeah.

There should be like a podcast.

There should be a potty awards.

Yeah, yeah.

And there are like fights that break out at the potty awards.

There'd be a lot.

Louis J is like, is like fucking like beating up Pod Save America.

Yes.

Yes.

Louis J is karateing this American life movie.

Yeah, just beating the shit out of Ira Glass.

I would love that, actually.

And then in between punches, people tell you to sign up for DraftKings.

I can't tell you

what it would feel like for rogies to be on stage and say, rogues?

Yeah, Podcaster of the Year goes to Adam Friedland.

And I just thank my parents.

That's what you think.

Not the producers or the cameras or anything, yeah.

No, fuck them.

No, I get it.

My parents,

from a young age, were like,

gotta...

Go into you gotta be on Nick's racist podcast.

Yeah.

And I didn't think it was possible.

I was like, who is Nick?

You know?

What is a podcast?

What is a podcast?

And they said, we've been to the city.

They're like, trust me.

Yeah, it's going to be trust.

It's like Rush Limbaugh, but you control it.

Yeah.

So live.

Rush

Limbaugh?

Yeah.

Rush.

That's a song by Rush?

Limbaugh is a song by Rush.

Oh, okay.

And it's Limbaugh was a guy.

Limbaughter

said some stuff online.

Yeah, you take Rush serious, though, because you're from Canada.

I take it very fucking seriously, and this is why there's a bit of me that wanted to fight you just now when you were like, Is that a Rush song?

I'm like, How the fuck do you not know that?

Because every day in Halifax, Nova Scotia, where I'm from, when I was growing up, I would raise the lobster smoking a cigarette flag, and I would play Limbaugh by Rush.

Not a serious country.

It's a province.

Well, first of all, Nova Scotia is a province in a country.

Whatever, dude.

Liza Minelli is doing this.

Okay?

And rush, they got the name from doing pop, is about doing poppers, right?

The rush of a popper.

The rush of doing a popper before Jonathan Candy has sex.

Yes.

Before you pound Jonathan Candy.

Before Jonathan Pandy.

No, it's Jonathan Candy's pound.

Or rush.

Jonathan Candy's rush that it gets prior to being pounded.

Okay, so Liza.

And she's bleeding.

Her arms are broken.

One of her legs is off.

Really?

Gone.

And it's just spraying.

Spraying everywhere.

She's so in love with him that she's like, your balls are shriveled.

Yes.

She's decided that her new mission in life is to fill this man's balls with her magic.

And that is the power of love.

Right.

That's a good song.

Yeah.

So she's doing this.

The driver is.

She's doing raided lightning.

Yeah.

Okay, at the driver.

The driver's doing a fucking Mandarin accent for whatever reason.

Raid.

And she finds it.

Super racist.

But super racist.

Super racist.

It's Justin Trudeau.

Yeah, no,

he's doing Blackface.

He really can do it all.

Yeah, he's in Blackface doing Chinese accent.

I'm like, bro,

you're random.

That is random of you.

Justin Trudeau,

one of his runs was that.

He actually ran that way.

In Blackface, doing a Mandarin.

One of his runs.

Like runs for a prime minister.

Isn't that what it is?

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Well, I know.

I just said that right now.

Don't you run for him?

Isn't that like run the presidential race?

Baby talks.

No, yeah.

One of Trump's runs.

Please.

So

Trudeau, only for a little bit.

Had the blackface and the Mandarin Essex.

Okay.

But he won.

But he's like, he didn't,

he wasn't a main character.

I mean, he was just, it was a cameo appearance.

In the movie?

In the movie, right?

Oh, I was talking about like in his actual.

Yeah, no, he was a cameo.

I've never seen this fucking movie.

I just won't.

I've been trying to fucking get it.

Sorry, I keep cutting you off.

No, it's my fault.

No, it's my fault.

I'm not good at podcasting.

I've done it for eight years.

I'm not good at being a guest on Adam.

You're amazing.

You're incredible.

At the beginning of the movie,

I forgot to fucking tell you this part, and I apologize.

I thought you were Bill Burr for half of this.

Dudley Moore is pounding John Candy, but I forgot to fucking tell you.

Oh, but let's go back to the first scene.

Just to bring this part into.

Because we're only in the second scene.

But I'm going to explain all of it.

It's all going to make fucking sense, Adam.

So as Dudley Moore is pounding Jonathan Candy, who is holding Jonathan Candy's hand?

Juan Justin Trudeau in blackface speaking Mandarin.

Wait, and then he's back driving the car the next scene?

He's not in.

Well, yes.

He is back to driving the car.

So there's no like temporal.

So it's like kind of magical realism.

There's no temporal like...

The script doesn't make sense.

It made a lot of sense when when I saw it as well.

When you saw it, you're like, but as an adult, it's kind of like when you're a kid, you're like, hell yeah.

And then as an adult, you're like, hey, come on.

Like, Turtles 26.

He can't be holding this slam pig's hand and then in the car getting

electrocuted.

Well, he's driving the car.

How do you get to the car?

He's driving the car.

Justin Trudeau was in the blackface doing the Mandarin accent, but he's...

Dudley Moore

is the one pounding candy.

But you're saying Trudeau is holding the hand.

Yes.

Okay, so the guy holding the hand is also on the street level.

No, wait.

At street level, you fucked up.

No, no, you're right.

You're misremembering.

Just admit you made a mistake.

Here's what happened.

Just try.

Just do better.

Just please try.

I am trying, and I apologize.

Okay, so how.

No, here's what happened.

Well, what I'm saying is this.

How is he waiting for him downstairs?

This is what I'm trying to bring together now.

Okay, okay.

Here's what I fucked up on.

The limo driver is downstairs waiting for Dudley Moore, who's upstairs pounding John Candy, Jonathan Candy.

Jonathan Candy is holding hands with one Justin Trudeau in the first time he's ever been seen publicly since his dad brought him out.

And he's wearing black face and he's speaking in a Mandarin accent.

Now,

once Dudley Moore comes all over Jonathan Candy and hits his head on the fucking wall like I almost just did.

Oh, no, through the wall, and then he hits his head.

Yes,

powerfully calming.

He's screaming, screaming because his balls are just and then there's a wily coyote kind of body.

But as that's happening, as he's violently coming,

Justin Trudeau in Blackface.

He's banging into shit.

I think coming.

He knocks over a lamp.

A fucking fire starts.

I forgot to tell you that.

Oh, the fire.

But that was a real fire on set.

Very real.

It was a.

Yeah, they couldn't go back.

They said real, fucking, real fire.

Real fucking.

They said that in the trailer.

They said real, real fucking.

Real tragedy.

So,

this is the part that I forgot to tell you, Adam, is that when he violently comes, okay, Justin Trudeau, in his first acting ever, and only he's wearing blackface.

He's speaking in a manner as he runs out of the apartment because it's on fire.

He passes the driver.

The driver sees him.

Oh, the driver's a different guy?

Yes.

That's what I fucked up on.

So then, when the driver's got a bad guy, he just lines up an Ellie.

Okay, you got confused.

So who's the driver?

The driver's just a guy.

An illegal.

Yeah, I think so.

Yeah, he should have been in the

head touring over our border

from one end to 100%.

He wasn't in SAG.

He wasn't in SAG.

He said he was in SAG.

That was a smart movie.

He wrote S-A-G.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

And then they fact-checked it later, and that stands for a whole other thing.

Yeah, yeah.

Studios.

You don't want to know.

You don't want to know.

Yeah.

Gay.

Homophobic Hollywood.

Yeah.

H.

That's a long.

S-A-G-H.

H-H.

Yeah.

Yeah.

SAGA.

SAGA.

SAG.

SAGH.

So, anyways, that's

he got that.

And that's the noise that Dudley made while he was violently coming.

But way louder and way harder and way

British accent.

More violent.

It was violent.

But okay, continue.

He's never come like this.

He's not saying violent is it scary for the audience.

It was scary for him.

He thought he was going to die.

He never came like that.

And you were six years old.

It must have been scary for you, too.

I was five, I think, five, six.

Well, it was

interesting for me.

I didn't know what was happening.

I didn't even have a you know what I mean?

I didn't know what happened.

Is this what growing up is?

Okay, okay.

So Liza drops through.

Yes, and the reason that the fucking limo driver becomes, he paints Blackface and the Mandarin X is because he just saw

he's copying.

Okay, so Liz Minnelli is doing this.

So not only is it not,

not only is he a bad driver, but he's a copier too.

Strike two.

Thief, yeah.

Yeah, yeah.

Yeah, strike two.

Theft at the highest level.

level, I'd say he's a fucking mencia

strike two,

theft at the highest level is mencia.

I didn't remember that.

Well, again, I'm so young, I have no, I don't know who really any of you.

You don't know actors, I just know Las Manelli and Dudley Moore.

I know that, yeah, yeah.

So, anyways, she's she's doing this, okay, and she's putting the fucking big trouble in little china, raiding fucking beams into his body, trying to inflate his bag.

However,

however, it turns him into

a cartoon Aardvark.

And the movie.

Yes.

And that's where the fucking cartoon came from, Adam.

I thought I was like, I just feel like...

I feel like I've been just crossed over and dunked on.

Because I've seen like so much criterion,

Janus, Jan, Janush films.

I've seen like every A24.

I thought I knew movies,

but I just, I did not know that.

This is a massive gap in my knowledge.

And I'm just, I'm, I just, like, I, uh, uh,

Good Morrow, sir, or whatever they say.

Yes.

In London.

In London.

Blue Chew wants the entire country to rock hard.

They told me.

That's the mission.

They will not stop until every man is bricked up like a brick house.

They will not stop.

They will not stop.

They're at my door every day.

They're relentless.

They're banging on my door.

They're sky every day.

It's a threat.

It is a threat.

I feel molested by this copy.

Be hard.

They will not stop.

They will not stop.

They will stalk us.

And you cannot not be hard.

If you go down even one bit, take a blue chip.

They're going to be fucking pissed.

A company.

To know that both of us are soft right now while you read this are going to be livid.

A guy is mad at me for not having a bone.

I'm like, shut up, dude.

Thank you for advertising, but this is crazy.

Till every tent is pitched.

Till every rod is raised.

Oh, my God.

I want to throw him.

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Ugh.

Let's read it one more time.

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The flavor is blue.

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Okay, all right.

So

she uses lightning, he's a cartoon.

Yeah.

And that's the end of the movie?

No, there's no, there's a good hour after that.

So, what's

what happens to the rest of the movie?

Yeah, it becomes like a pretty polite family of

introspection, honestly, about one Ard Vark's journey through Central Park.

But everyone else is like in the real world, and there's a cartoon in it.

They used to do that kind of shit a lot.

Yeah, but Roger Rabbit.

Yes, but he's not full Vark.

He's not full Ard.

He's able.

Come on.

What?

In this day and age, like, using a.

You can't, like, say the slur for.

Like.

Ard is a slur for Ardvark?

Ard?

Ard?

There's a history there.

I don't.

There's a history there.

What's the history?

I don't know.

I didn't know that it was a slur until I went to Australia, but they were like, look, a bunch of odds, damn me.

Jesus, I didn't know.

Yeah.

He's not full Vak.

Yeah.

And I was like,

it's just.

Yeah, yeah.

Because racism is objectively wrong.

Yeah.

You know, and like, it's just like in this day and age, it's back open for debate.

Like, well, I didn't know.

Look, I didn't know.

I thought we had decided that Ard Varks were, it was open season on the Varks.

But now that I know, I won't say Ard.

I won't call them Ard.

You said it again.

But to tell you that I'm not going to say it again.

I'm not going to say it again.

And you can get rock ard with bluechew.com.

Thank you.

Okay, continue.

Your vark

will be raised.

Noah got varked.

Before he had sex with the animal.

Yeah, he fucked all those animals.

He did.

Yes, he did.

No one talks about it.

Nobody talks about it.

No one talks about it.

It's finally brought to you.

Because it's the media.

It's the media.

It's the fucking media.

It's the fucking media.

They're too busy showing us a rock hard dick or a soft dick.

And we're just terrified to leave our house because

I might get sexually assaulted.

There might be a lot of assets.

It's at an all-time high.

It's fucking.

The pre-com is.

He did have sex with the animals.

So Dudley Moore, fuck, man.

Look, I'm misremembering and I keep fucking things up, but Dudley Moore is able to turn back and forth from person to Vark.

Ard Vark.

Ard Vark.

Car Turkey.

So many great men have lost careers because of this kind of thing.

It's just irresponsible.

There's a few men that have actually made some pretty good careers, though, honestly, just saying Vark.

Yeah, yeah.

You know what I mean?

They're doing pretty well.

They're selling those weird pills.

Not Blue Chew.

The other other ones.

They're like free speech kind of style.

Free speech guys.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

I'm sick of this crap.

Me too.

Yeah, yeah.

You know, where are the PC police?

Where have they gone?

Yeah.

Do they just, are they dead?

Do we defund them too?

It's crazy.

I'd like to know where they are because seriously, somebody's got to be out there.

Yeah, yeah.

I think there should be a, like a kind of a, what do you call it?

Like a

PC social worker instead of a PC police.

Like a, like a, yeah.

Somebody comes to your house, knocks on your door.

Yeah.

And how are you treating your kids?

Yeah, yeah.

And then they ask them what I'm saying.

And I'm like, don't talk to me.

Don't tell me how to raise my kids.

Don't tell me how to raise my kids.

I know how both of them come.

I know how they come.

I know how both of them come.

I know exactly how they come.

Father knows.

Father knows.

And I shouldn't have put it on Facebook.

Yeah.

Shouldn't have been my first status of dating.

You're never going to guess how Jenny comes.

I figured it out.

He's able to turn back and forth from cartoon Aardvark to Real Man.

So the rest of the people.

There is that weird sex scene, right?

There is another wild sex scene.

Yeah, where he's going back and forth.

Yes.

Yeah.

Because Aardvarks, people don't really know this.

They have longer dicks than a regular human man does.

Oh, they are packing.

Heat.

Heat.

The movie Heat.

They have a Blu-ray copy of the movie Heat, and they bring it everywhere they go.

They're like,

you got to see this scene with

Gino and General.

And I'm packing heat, dude.

The movie

I'm packing Heat.

Or Heat 2.

There's a book.

There's a book.

I read the book.

Did you read the book?

No, I don't know how.

Well,

so he's not from Canada.

There is that wild sex scene where he's pounding

crazy.

He's pounding Liza Minelli.

Now she's holding John Candy's hand, Jonathan Candy.

Well, he's in a cage crying.

Yes.

Yes, because

her landlord doesn't want her to have any pets.

And Ardvark is clearly that.

You know, when landlords are like, man, you can't have a fish, you can't have a cat.

Oh, my God.

The rent.

The rent.

Yeah, man.

Like, I see that.

And we're not, it's not.

I'm Jew.

I can, yeah.

I pay my rent.

The rent, you know.

So she.

And I'm like, you're Chinese.

Why are you saying it that way?

Again, it's the bait and switch.

Bait and switch.

And he's going Chinese, Jewish, Chinese.

Back and forth, back and forth.

It's a real theme in that movie.

Yeah, it's crazy.

You did a lot of bending of things.

A lot of big trouble in Little China something.

yeah yeah yeah so so he's in the cage as the aardvark weeping and she's like you're gonna me now and he makes the aardvark noise you know what that is so candy also becomes

candy's also back it's his uh but he also severely burned by the way because he was he they left him in that fucking apartment the fire he's he's severely burned like 90 of his body is scorched real fire real fire real fucking real fire

he was eating

real fire it was a real fire.

That Dudley Moore started when he violently

blew the fucking lighting over.

He knocked over like two or three lamps.

He used candles.

Yeah, that was what they used candles to light the room.

Yeah, there was no lighting.

Scented.

Yeah, scented.

It smelled like a fucking bath and body working.

Yeah, now we use Glade plug-ins.

It's like a full-on flame.

So he's packing Heat the movie.

And he's in the cage.

And

he keeps switching back and forth from Artvark to Moore.

Who's watching this still?

Okay, continue.

What is this?

I feel like we're torturing whoever this is.

There's a guy that's so mad.

He's like, where is Nick?

What did you want?

I apologize.

What did you want?

I might have fucked up.

I'm having.

This is the first time I've been happy in months.

You know where I stand on this.

I'm having a great day.

I'm having the best day of my life.

But I will say this.

When I walked in, before we started recording, you brought up the song Christopher Cross with Arthur Stevens.

Which is one cheek and another cheek.

I know it's crazy.

Yes, pounding.

But it's true.

He's about to come.

Do you know that Christopher Cross, he released his first single was a big hit on the radio.

And then pictures of him were published in magazines.

And he was literally,

he didn't take it to the next level, really, because he was just a pretty unattractive guy.

I did know that he's a gargoyle guy.

He had a face for radio.

Did you know, though, he's making a comeback because of the body positivity movement?

Yeah, I can't.

I'm serious.

Yeah, I know.

People are like, gargoyles are people, too.

What's weird about Christopher Cross is that he wasn't just like ugly

conventionally.

He was shocking.

He wasn't like.

He was shocking.

He was freak show.

He had those fangs

that just drooped out of his mouth.

And he was always coming up.

He was a fucking freak Yeah, he's crazy.

It's like, ugh.

He was like a wolf, Kai.

Just

get a room.

Get a room.

Get a room like, don't be out.

No, get like a circus.

A room in the circus.

Yeah, get a room in the circle.

And we'll come see you sometime.

Yeah, they do like a fucking freak show after.

He was like a bearded lady that could sing.

You know what makes sense if you went to fucking Washington, D.C.

with all those clowns?

Oh, absolutely.

No, you're onto something there.

You're really onto something there.

I'm serious.

All of the clowns go there.

All the mimes, too.

Did you know that?

Really?

Yes.

Yes.

They stand outside of.

If I was a clown, I would fucking hate them.

The mimes?

Yeah.

As a mime, I'd hate clowns.

No, fuck.

I don't care about them.

I don't care about them.

Well,

they wear makeup, too.

Not all mimes.

No, they do white face.

And no one complains.

No one complains.

No one complains about it.

Yeah, you're right.

Nobody fucking complains.

But our Prime Minister, Prime Minister Justin, does it

25, 30 times.

Yeah.

And it's a fucking

uncountable amount of time.

But the fucking mimes, and he's from Canada.

I know.

He's surrounded by them.

Yeah, I know.

I know.

I know.

He grew up in Quebec.

That's the home of mimes.

And they're just doing white chicks constantly.

Yes.

Right?

They keep playing that fucking

Natalie Bruglia.

Is that her name?

Gentlemen,

she's a child.

And I want to tell

talk about it.

That's the end, by the way.

Oh, so they don't play the theme song again.

No, not the Christopher Cross one.

Because the Christopher Cross one at that point in time had been played out too many times.

Yeah, they were like, this song's played out.

I hate it when you hear it too many times.

Yeah.

So we have to go into the future and get a song from that movie

that hasn't happened yet.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

So here, let me apologize to you.

So that song came up.

And we talked this whole time.

Was there anything that you wanted?

Was this podcast.

Did this have a topic?

Fuck, sorry, that I stepped on that we didn't end up getting to?

Oh, yeah, I'll be in London in September.

Two shows are sold out.

The low tickets on the third,

I want to add a fourth.

I'm huge there in a place where

bad comedy is popular.

I remember you, yeah, yeah, we were going to talk about that.

We were talking about that.

But no, no,

I don't want to insult these people.

No, I get it.

The queen died.

So we went in a whole...

She did die.

Horrible accident.

Terrible.

Terrible accident.

Do you know how she died?

In the papers.

I know.

She's fucking a horse.

No.

She missed her hand situation.

Nope.

No, the horse was attached to an apparatus to support the horse's weight.

And in kind of like a

lethal weapon style.

Not lethal weapon, naked gun style hijinks.

The horse, someone was like, there was a butler, he was holding a tray and bounced off this this this oj simpson stab and then the the horse apparatus broke crushed her to death and i'll be uh the 22nd

london what about you um i have a uh a special on uh youtube called down with tech check it out and uh i'm gonna be in check my website wavefamackintosh.com you're you're you're you're taking shots elon fuck you bezos fuck you zuckerberg Steve Jobs.

Zuckerberg.

Come on.

So this is.

Zuckerberg's like the cool one.

He's pretty cool.

Yeah, that's cool.

So that's the story that Piers Morgan wants you to hear.

The horse

falling on the queen.

No, they covered it up.

They covered it up.

They blamed.

This is what I heard.

They blamed who they blame every time, which is the state of Israel.

And it's not true.

They didn't kill her.

Was it a big flag that covered her?

And she couldn't get out of it?

The Israeli flag fell on her and she couldn't get out.

Is that what you mean?

That's not what happened.

Like, you know, in school when you had those parachutes, did a giant flag just cover the queen and she couldn't get out?

I'm asking.

I'm literally asking you.

I don't know what you're talking about.

And it didn't happen.

It was the horse thing.

I mean, Piers Morgan says that, but I heard a different thing.

But either way, that's a good story.

I heard.

I thought it was pierced.

Pierced?

Yeah, pierced, Morgan.

Pierced.

Like, like, ear-pierced?

I thought he was like,

I have a Prince Albert.

I'm Pierced Morgan.

And I've got a cock ring.

I'm Pierced Morgan.

And

I've got a tongue ring

to give because I'm a slut.

Yes.

I'm a slut.

I like to blow the men.

And

I blow men.

Oh, he's a friend of the show.

He's a friend of the show.

He has wild ad reads on his show.

He does.

Well, that's what it is.

He just did an impression.

So, guys, guys, listen.

Oh, I didn't even say.

Our guest name is Nathan McIntosh.

Thanks for joining us.

Thanks for having me, man.

This was amazing.

A fever dream.

I had a good time.

And just to say if anybody, whatever this was, you can follow me on everything at Nathan McIntosh.

OnlyFans.

And OnlyFans.

Is that what you said?

OnlyFans.

But your name is Macintosh, but down with tech?

That's like kind of the bit.

Well, it's because I was born into the tech industry, so I have an insider's look.

Really?

Yeah.

Yeah, yeah.

I'm the reason that the computer was named Apple.

And

your dad was Mr.

McIntosh from the film Blank Check, which we will get into next time.

Thank you, Macintosh.

Thanks a lot, guys.

Bye.

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