Dating Coach: Pauly Couch Cushions

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We interrupt your regularly scheduled WSHIT program to bring you this breaking news special report.

Brian Green, local Crab Apple resident, creator, and co-host of one of the least successful comedy podcasts ever to be published, has been awake for over three hours, staring at Instagram on his phone.

For the latest, we now go inside Brian's brain.

brain.

I just got sent a weird DM by a follower of mine.

They were like, hey, are you okay?

You disappeared.

And I'm like, no, I'm still here posting stuff.

What the hell?

What the heck does that mean?

And I just sent them a bunch of messages and they've gone like dead silent on me.

Instagram, what is happening?

Seriously.

What the hell?

This is weird as heck.

Whatever.

Local officials for the township are aware of this situation and are telling Crab Apple residents, while Brian has reached maximum delusion, he is generally a harmless idiot.

We'll keep you abreast of any changes and we'll be back after this commercial break.

On this episode of the Commercial Break.

Zero frame.

This is the first time you really ever been in shape, so it's not something you...

What happened to the couch cushions?

Now we're moving them around.

I didn't do what God did.

Positively.

Flip it, flap it, let it go, all right?

Jesus, Chrissy, is fucking killing me over here.

Trying to talk to the guys.

All you're doing is

you're comfortable with it, and you feel powerful and things of that nature.

So you're not leading.

She doesn't feel like she's being led.

So those muscles mean nothing if she's not being led.

Muscles.

Where's your leash?

You got to get a leash you gotta get a collar and a leash you gotta be led you know what i'm saying she wants to be led like a little doggy rough rough you know what i'm saying god said it i didn't say it fuck that come on let's go

the next episode of the commercial break starts now

Oh, yeah, cats and kittens.

Welcome back to the commercial break.

I'm Brian Greene.

This is my dear friend and the co-host of this show, Chris and Joy Hoadley.

Best to you, Chris.

Best to you, Brian.

Best to you out there in the podcast universe.

I was at, um, maybe it was a coffee shop, maybe it was Starbucks.

I was up there and I was talking to somebody, some guy that was standing there.

And he had, I forgot how the conversation started.

He had like a bag of plantains or something, and he was mentioning something about coffee.

And I said, oh, you got some plantains.

My wife is Venezuelan.

She likes plantains.

To which he replied, oh, your wife is Venezuelan.

And I said, yes, she is.

And he goes, oh,

well, she must have, that was a really, probably a really tough childhood she had.

And I said, what do you mean?

And he goes, well, I know there's a lot of starving children there.

And, you know, the education system isn't so good.

And I said, are you, are you a moron?

This is the thing you get when you get, when you have a bi-nationality.

When you like have a mixed family, right?

People, and listen, I know I've been guilty of this in my past too.

So in my head at least, I don't usually say these words out loud, but people make these huge

umbrella assumptions about Venezuelans.

It's not Ethiopia in the 1980s.

Venezuela was one of the richest countries on earth before,

before Hugo Chavez took over and decided to suck all that money from the Venezuelan people.

It's also one of the most educated countries on earth.

My wife has two master's degrees.

I have a master in nothing.

I barely went to school.

I barely made it through school.

And my wife had

a relatively,

generally speaking, normal childhood and grew up in a middle-class home and, you know, very nice things.

Caracas, I hear, is one of the most beautiful places on earth.

But the assumption sometimes that is made when I say that my wife is Venezuelan is that I took some, you know, poor

out of her

out of

poverty.

Yeah.

And the uneducated poor woman that I adopted, and this is not,

what's that movie with Julia Roberts?

Pretty woman.

This is not pretty woman.

I didn't pull her up out of there.

She pulled me up out of poverty.

That is true.

I pulled her into poverty, is what happened.

Okay?

All right.

She was doing just fine until she met me.

This isn't like a sympathy plea that I made because I'd like to bring home straight cats.

Astrid is well-educated, well-spoken, well-to-do.

I mean, well-to-do general sense, right?

She's middle class.

But I hate it when people just make these stupid assumptions.

I know.

And he was like, How did you guys communicate at first?

And I was like, How do with words?

What do you mean?

How do we communicate?

Unlike the United States of America, Venezuela is not under the assumption that everybody in the world is going to speak Espanolo.

Well, and she wasn't like a mail-order bride.

Yes.

You were communicating with like a translator from her computer in like a shack.

That's right.

Somewhere.

I didn't pay per minute to text her and have it translated.

I didn't take a tour bus around the country to

dance halls looking for women.

I mean, I didn't do that.

We met through a mutual friend.

He has a 90-day fiancé.

Yeah, it's a 90-day fiancé or that Russian mail-order bride thing that we watched that one time.

But it's just like, you know,

it goes without saying that Venezuela is taking a lot of heat right now, thanks to some people elected dually into office.

That Venezuela is taking a lot of heat.

And that, particularly, Trump has flip-flopped a lot on Venezuela.

When he was in office last time, he wanted to protect the Venezuelans from the communist government.

Now the Venezuelans are invading the United States of America.

They are more educated.

They are harder working.

Did you know that almost 75%

of all working-class male Venezuelan immigrants are working?

That's more than any other population, domesticated or undomesticated in the United States.

They are educated, highly educated, by and large.

A lot of them speak the language.

It's just kind of silly.

They're silly assumptions.

And I know we make these assumptions about a lot of different types of people.

It's not just Venezuelans.

It happens to be the one that's close to my family, but it just drives me up a fucking wall.

I just wanted to know if you liked plantains, dude.

Yeah.

Christina Anmanyanpor.

I didn't need your world dissertation on the state of Venezuela.

Really, honestly.

I think that, you know, we could probably learn a little bit more from people who want to better themselves and better than family.

Here's the point.

Here's a point that I've been making for a long time, long before we became so tribalized.

And long before I met my Venezuelan wife, because I had Venezuelan friends who were essentially my family.

That's how I got into the Venezuelan culture and how I met my wife.

Geography and where you're born, your nationality is really a lottery.

And when you think about it, that's the only way to describe it.

It is like a universal,

you win or you don't win, you're here or you're there kind of lottery.

You don't choose where you're born and you don't choose to whom you're born and you don't choose which lines you're born within or without.

You don't.

So the fact that a lot of people, especially it seems like right now, get fired up about that imaginary line in the sand and whether or not someone has crossed it or will cross it to make a better life for themselves generally,

then I say fuck you because it's a lottery and you won it this go round.

But what happens if you don't win it next go round if you believe in that kind of shit?

And what happens if someday that imaginary line in the sand

moves to the other side of you to not include you?

Mm-hmm.

Right.

Because, you know, United States is the greatest country on earth.

I firmly believe that, but maybe it's not always going to be.

And maybe you're going to want to go somewhere else and then they're going to say, fuck you, because we don't like you, because you were born in that country.

It's such a stupid thing to get all upset about.

And here's, here, and I'm not trying to get on a high horse.

Immigration is a hot-button issue right now.

It really is.

And you don't have to be a genius to figure out how I feel about it.

I have a Venezuelan wife.

You don't need to.

You don't need a doctorate or you don't need two master's degrees to figure out how Brian Green feels about this.

I think it's really silly for us to feel so incredibly spiteful and hateful to someone because they were born on the other side of an imaginary line.

I really do.

Do I think we need immigration reform?

Absolutely.

If you walk into my house and you're a criminal, do I want you here?

No, I do not want you here.

But if you're here with good intent and you want to do some good and you feel like you're going to contribute to the household, I'm going to listen.

I'm at least going to give you a chance, right?

And all that aside, it's our constitutional obligation to give someone their

ability to argue their case.

Yeah, I mean, the nation was built on with immigrants.

That's it.

We're all immigrants.

We are.

We're all immigrants.

Very few of us are natives to this land.

Yes.

But how quickly we forget that when it's time for vitriol, hate, and spit.

And I don't understand for the life of me how some people are sleeping at night when the things that they're doing to families and to children and then the people who are cheering them on.

It is hate as a sport and it is fucked up.

It is really fucked up.

And

so, and I think that while this guy may not have been one of those people, I don't know, I didn't stand around to talk to him about his particular political leanings.

It just sounded really ignorant.

Like the whole thing sounded really ignorant.

That's not just the generalization of anybody from a country.

Yeah, he's believing the generalizations that are being put out there.

Take the time to get yourself educated about the people you're disliking so much.

It's so fucking silly, guys.

It's fucking silly.

We can argue about the debt ceiling and whether or not these laws should be enacted or we should go to war or not go to war or whatever.

We can argue about that in the halls of Congress.

That's why we elect officials.

But we, and I don't believe in war either, but when we are at home in our own, on our own backyards and we are literally beating the shit out of people who did nothing except for cross an imaginary line to get a better life,

I think we should really reevaluate our place in humanity because that is silliness.

And then when we're believing the lines that are fed to us without any evidence to the contrary, zero evidence that it's true, uh, is really, it's really kind of fucked up.

It's really fucked up.

I agree.

And it makes me just sad.

It makes me sad.

It makes me sad for everybody that is getting caught up in all of this drama.

It makes me sad for the people who are probably somewhere deep down, good people, who are just getting caught up in the Facebook posts and the Twitter feeds and the constant barrage of bullshit that's coming at them that they're believing.

And it makes me feel most sad

for the kids.

The children.

100%.

Yeah.

Who are getting ripped from their families or their families ripped from them.

And then just from the children who are just born in this country right now, who are going to have to at some point act like the adults that we are not being.

That, my friend, is the saddest thing of all, is that the kids are going to have to pick up all these dirty fucking pieces because we refuse to act like humans.

And that is silliness.

Silliness.

Off my high horse, because someone likes plantains does not mean they grew up in poverty, uneducated unable to speak any language whatsoever okay just remember that next time you're talking to somebody okay chrissy

it's the happiest place on earth have happy

holy shit where's the thylenol

chrissy and i were talking about the fact that poly family a show that chrissy and i hated but we were watching anyway just all of a sudden up and left

i cannot find for the life of me any information i can't either.

Possibly

usually there would be the little Google thing that says, you know, like somebody else had asked, what happened to the show?

But it's on IMDb.

It's gone.

It's not, I mean, it's there.

The first six episodes are there, but they totally left it because there was a storyline happening.

I'm asking ChatGPT to see if he can see if it can search the web and find any information.

Polly family has not officially or formally been canceled, but all signs point to it being gone.

Yeah.

Reddit viewers note that episode five and six aired back-to-back and were labeled the season finale with no announcement of more episodes.

I didn't realize that was labeled season finale, but there was a whole storyline.

Yeah.

However, speculation is that TLC quietly ended it early, likely due to low ratings and backlash against cast member Sean, who had been linked to controversies.

Oh,

what?

Sean was

the one that nobody wanted to sleep with.

That's right.

Okay.

Yes.

He was the one that none of the girls got excited about.

Yeah.

Controversies was Sean involved with?

Question mark.

We are learning this in real time.

This is the fog of war, kids.

I'm having chat TCB figure it all out for us.

Alleged emotional and psychological abuse.

Say it isn't so.

Reddit users frequently describe him as controlling and volatile.

Control and rage seem to be how he

monopolizes the family.

It's extremely abusive.

Okay.

Past

talk today.

I am having such a problem.

What is wrong with my mouth?

Past accusations of sexual harassment.

Viewers shared claims that Sean was fired for sexual harassment from a workplace or high school coaching role.

Ooh.

Involvement of child protection services.

Wow.

Multiple temporary custody modifications were filed by his ex-wife,

citing immediate danger and inappropriate online interactions with a minor.

One ex-wife reported that the Department of Human Services and Police

intervened after allegations of leaving his daughter unsupervised with stepchildren

associated with a sexually acting out committee.

What does that?

I don't even know what that means.

Multiple ex-wives and multiple paternity claims.

Multiple ex-wives.

I thought they didn't.

They didn't have any kids.

I thought.

I mean, they had the one.

Well.

But they're saying he had.

Like previously.

Yeah, he had previously.

Oh, he did.

Yes.

Wow.

Okay.

Well, that's the reason to yank it.

Okay.

Well, good night.

See you later.

Polly Family No More.

Didn't know that.

Had no idea.

This is the thing: is like, you know, you get involved with these television shows, and then months and months later, all this bullshit comes out.

It's like I was watching 90 Day Fiancé the other way a couple of years ago, and there was a guy who was a sperm donor, quote unquote, and then they had the Netflix documentary, The Man Who Spermed the World or something.

I don't know what it was called.

And to find out that he was a part of a cult, essentially, that was running around trying to make as many children as possible so that they could have their own little fiefdom of kids running around.

They wanted their DNA to be like a lineage throughout the world and history by multiplying, but they had to essentially impregnate enough women to make that happen,

which is crazy.

That's like a weird, I don't know, God fetish or something like that.

But I didn't, I had no idea about any of this with Sean.

And now I can understand why TLC may have quietly shelved this.

I think so, too.

But Sean definitely was the X Factor in the family for sure.

Yeah, he was.

And he was kind of mean.

There was an episode, the first episode.

With the kid?

Yes.

Yes, I hated that.

Where the two fathers, so Polly Family, in case you don't know, in case you have your head in a hole and you're not listening to the commercial break, Polly Family is another, you know, kind of,

I don't know how to say this,

like fetish porn from TLC, where they get into weird situations of people's lives and make a whole television show about it, where two families had gotten together,

two couples, a man and a woman, a man and a woman, living under the same roof, all of them fucking each other.

Well, no, not all of them.

It was just the men.

The men fucking the women.

Yeah, it would, the men would basically switch every other day.

Then you were with the other woman.

They weren't together.

The women weren't together and the men weren't together.

Yes.

Well, but the one of the women did want to be with the other woman, but she had said no.

Right.

So it was, it was all weird.

Like, right?

You know, okay, you had to get the premise.

Then they had kids.

Then the other couple had previous kids.

They brought into it.

And then

everybody got pregnant like three different times.

I don't know.

It was weird.

Okay.

It's hard to follow.

And really, it was non-instrumental to the story.

So I never really paid attention to whose kids were whose.

They wouldn't even tell the children.

The two older kids were the not Sean and his wife, the other couple.

Yeah.

So

they're sitting at a table.

One of the daughters comes home, one of the younger daughters comes home from school.

And one of the fathers, not Sean, can't even remember his name, not Sean.

Who was the biological father?

Yes.

They're the ones that brought those two older children into the marriage.

He says he starts talking to the daughter.

And Sean is sitting at the table also.

And he says, nope, not going to do this.

You got to go downstairs.

You're grounded.

And the father, the birth father of the child is like, what's going on?

And he says, she's grounded.

She was grounded and she can't sit here and talk because she's grounded.

Finish your food and go downstairs.

Yeah.

And he doesn't cause a stink.

The birth father doesn't cause a stink.

But when the girl leaves, he explains, I just wanted to talk to my daughter after this.

I've been at work all day.

And he's like, don't make me out to be the bad guy.

She's grounded.

And so she needs to live up.

I didn't know talking was against the grounding rules.

I mean, I was grounded a lot when I was a kid, but I was still allowed to talk.

Talk, exactly.

Yeah.

I mean, especially to my parents.

That's, that's what I, that's all I was allowed to do, essentially.

It was just really weird.

And Sean was always getting upset about something or other in the situations.

He was jealous.

He was mad.

He didn't like the other guy.

The other guy was stepping on his toes.

He couldn't be a parent.

And go figure, the ladies did not want to have sex with him.

They got all excited about the other guy when it was his night to sleep with them.

They got all excited and shaved their legs and put on perfume.

But it was Sean's night.

They were like,

and it was like, you could tell they just weren't as emotionally, physically, or

sexually as involved with Sean.

As a matter of fact, the very last episode that I saw, one of the couples, the Sean and one of the women, went to a

yoga sex therapist to get their mojo back.

And Sean looked like,

I don't even know any other way to say it.

He looked like a circus clown trying to fit in in church.

I mean, the guy really looked like he was out of his element.

He did not know the first thing to do or say when it came to sex or they kind of had foreplay with his wife.

Now, I don't know that any of these allegations are true.

I'm not saying they are.

This is literally chat GPT sucking up bullshit information from the internet.

Could just be people talking because that's what happens when you get a certain amount of notoriety.

People come out of the woodwork saying stuff about you, and most likely, most of it is not true.

Yeah.

But this chat is citing some references that are not Reddit, like news stories.

So maybe Sean was up to no good.

And so if that's the case, doesn't TLC do any betting of these people?

If I can figure that out in one second, doesn't somebody at TLC go, ah, we should probably check this guy out?

Yeah, or speak to his ex-wife.

She might be coming back around with some allegations here.

Well, if there's multiple legal...

custody hearings you can get that information it's all you know you can't i when it comes to families i think a lot of that stuff is like the redacted but you can still pretty much figure out what's going on plus you hire a private eye they can figure out anything that's what private eyes do they go through your personal information even when it's sealed um all right Okay, so let's take a break and then we'll be back.

You make this rather snappy, won't you, Art?

Somebody can be picking you before 10 o'clock.

Hi, cats and kittens.

Rachel here.

Do you ever get the urge to speak endlessly into the void like Brian?

Well, I've got just the place for you to do that.

212-433-3TCB.

That's 212-433-3822.

Feel free to call and yell all you want.

Tell Brian I need a race.

Compliment Chrissy's innate ability to put up with all his shenanigans, or tell us a little story.

The juicier, the better, by the way.

We'd love to hear your voice, because Lord knows we're done listening to ourselves.

Also, give us a follow on your favorite socials at the Commercial Break on Insta, TCB Podcast on TikTok.

And for those of you who like to watch, oh, that came out wrong.

We put all the episodes out on video.

YouTube.com slash thecommercial break and tcbpodcast.com for all the info on the show.

Your free sticker, or just to see how pretty we look.

Okay, I gotta go now.

I've got a date.

With my dog?

No, seriously, Axel needs food.

Today is pork chop day.

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Okay, speaking of Sean and douchebags, somebody sent this to me on the TCB phone line, 2124333 TCB.

And you feel free to send content ideas.

We get quite a few.

Some of them are right for the show.

Some of them are not.

Some of them we just haven't gotten to yet.

So don't take offense if you send something and I haven't gotten to it yet.

Someone's claimed that this might be the new Frankie B, like the new younger Frankie B.

And I thought, well,

those are hard shoes to fill.

But maybe, but maybe.

So let's take a look at this guy.

He's kind of flying around social media right now.

A lot of people talking about this guy

and his

personality, so to speak.

I'm not going to say too much more.

Let's just, you want to take a listen?

Let's do it.

Here we go.

Three reasons why you're not getting laid, even when you're in shape, because it don't fucking matter, bro.

It's about so much more than that.

And if you think that's it, you got the whole game fucked up and twisted, man.

There's so much to digest.

I don't even know where to start.

Let's start with the black leather sofa he's on, and then the two or three or four throw pillows that are just thrown to the side.

Yes, that's definitely not leather, it's pleather.

Let's not get it mixed up.

He's got a big black pleather couch, a white wall behind him.

Chrissy's right.

There are three throw pillows for no good reason whatsoever thrown next to him for no good reason whatsoever.

In no order, what they're just stacked on top of each other.

This is a huge dude.

He is a big, beefy guy, probably in his early 30s, I would imagine.

High and tight on a little thin Italian beard, eyebrows

till Tuesday.

Yeah, I mean, well manicured.

Well manicured, but definitely their statement.

Yes.

White, buttoned-down, short-sleeve shirt, which is a choice.

It's a look and it's a choice.

I just want you to know that.

And

he's only got two of the buttons buttoned.

And then he's got a huge black belt with a buckle, huge watch on, tattoos up and down his arms and on his chest you have to see this guy youtube.com slash the commercial break um and that accent is unforgettable forget about it guys let's get into it it came from no women at all out of shape overweight to having girls that truly oh my god

this is team coach hp is where you can find him in case you're interested i'll give him a shout out he is now showing pictures of what i imagine is him uh he doesn't look the same but okay maybe the beard is different he doesn't have the hat on yeah there is one picture of him holding a girl uh just holding a girl with her face blurred out and right next to it is a picture of him at a what looks like a club or something i guess he's licking he's licking

her mouth while he's taking his selfie and looking at the camera it's disturbing listen i didn't say this shit god did god said it okay she's supposed to obey and submit to you so that's what we do we run on submission in a positive way.

Oh, there we go.

What does he even mean by that?

I didn't say it.

God said it.

You have to be, and I, I'm just going to say this.

I don't know who you are, and I'm sure we're going to be fast friends after this video, but God didn't say anything.

The Bible said it.

And the Bible was written not by God.

I think most historians would agree.

It's not written by God.

Well, also, he said God said he was out of shape.

Is that what I

said?

We run on submission.

The women submit to us.

We run on submission.

That's what God said.

You know what I'm saying?

Let's go over that again, Chrissy.

You're not understanding.

It's because you're a woman.

Just you sit there, shut up, and I'll do all the talking.

Okay.

Well, that's what we do.

We run on submission.

Oh, I got to run that back a little bit more, Chrissy.

You're bothering me.

You're getting in my head now.

Let me go back to these pictures.

You see me with this tongue down this throat?

That's what the women are submitting to me.

You know what I'm saying?

Submit to my fat tongue down your throat.

God damn it.

Look at that tongue.

It's so beautiful.

Listen, I didn't say this shit.

God said it.

Okay.

She's supposed to obey and submit to you.

So that's what we do.

We run on submission in a positive manner.

Do I need to positively run that back again?

I was misunderstanding.

I thought he was saying God said that she needed to side.

Listen, I didn't say it.

God said it.

You were born with a little few less brain cells than us men.

Okay.

I didn't say it.

God said it.

Okay.

Positively.

And make the rules God did.

So with that being said, let's dive into it.

Stackjack while I teach you how to max subscribe to the video.

Stackjack.

What?

You can't keep up because you're a woman.

Let the guys talk.

What are you getting involved for?

Stack, jack, flap and stack, flap, flap it, jack, flip it, flap it.

What about?

Oh, no.

Let's grow together, man.

I'm bringing you this heat.

So let's grow off it, man.

So, number one, three reasons why you're not getting laid while you're in shape.

Why the fuck would that happen?

While you're in shape.

Yeah, while you're in shape.

Because, you know, just because you got

a small dick and big arms doesn't mean you're going to get laid all the time.

You got to get your tongue game going.

You know what I'm saying, Chrissy?

If she doesn't want your tongue all the way down her mouth.

If she doesn't want to be eating your tongue like a big fat piece of steak, then you're

not doing it right.

All right, now shut up.

Flap, flip, flap, flap it, jack, let it go.

All right, let's grow together.

I said it on God.

I'm bringing the heat.

I'm bringing the heat.

Let's grow together.

Flap, Jack, submission.

Sense, but I'm going to break it down, make it make sense.

You got the body you dreamed of.

You finally got in shape.

You got jacked, but you're still not getting results with women.

What are we talking about here?

Why is this happening?

Let's break it to fuck.

Let's break it to fucking Down A to Z.

Come on, baby.

Number one, you.

A to Z.

I thought you were going one to three.

No, we're going A to Z.

Number one.

Okay?

Shut up.

You don't know.

God said it.

I didn't say it.

God said it.

Positively.

Positively.

Zero frame.

This is the first time you really ever been in shape, so it's not something you.

What happened to the couch cushions?

Now we're moving them around.

He did it.

I didn't do it.

God did it.

Positively.

Flip it, flap it, let it go, all right?

Jesus, Chrissy, you're fucking killing me over here.

Trying to talk to the guys.

All you're doing is

comfortable with, and you feel powerful and things of that nature.

So you're not leading.

She doesn't feel like she's being led.

So those muscles mean nothing if she's not being led.

Muscles.

Where's your leash?

You got to get a leash.

You got to get a collar and a leash.

You got to be led.

You know what I'm saying?

She wants to be led like a little doggy.

Rough, rough.

You know what I'm saying?

God said it.

I didn't say it.

Fuck that.

Come on, let's go.

They're an attribute.

They're an add-in.

But yet, these girls don't care about the muscles.

They come with the confidence and the things that come with the muscles.

Being a true leader, decisive, picking out meals, where are we going?

Picking out meals.

That's what a girl really wants.

Picking out meals.

You say, hey, we're going to McDonald's.

All right.

Double cheeseburger for you?

No, I don't think so.

Apples.

You'll get my apples from the happy meal because you're fat.

I don't like that.

If we're going.

Stalk video or photos of people he's describing.

I didn't do it.

Chat did it.

Positively.

All right.

Okay.

You know what I'm saying?

Let's grow together.

Let's get it together.

Come on.

Move those pillows again.

All right, good.

One out or not.

My chick said to me, You want to go out tonight?

I said, I don't think so.

She said, Good, me neither.

I got laid instantaneously.

You know what I'm saying?

My chick said to me, You want to go out?

I said, Fuck you.

You know what she did?

Blowjob instantaneously.

That's how it goes.

Micro penis.

All right, let's get it together.

She does whatever I want to do.

And you have to accept that role as the leader and not and take it like a man, otherwise, it comes off fraudulent.

So you got it.

Yes, of course I am.

I guess he's very alert, and then his eyes flutter.

355 cc's to GHB before I go hit it.

You know what I'm talking about?

I got the Roy 255 of testostes.

You know what I'm saying?

Testosterone.

Testostes.

I didn't say it, God said it.

He said, get as swole as you can.

They get a blowjob before dinner.

And if she wants to go pizza, you say, no, I want steak.

That's how it goes.

All right.

I didn't say it.

God said it.

It is submit it.

All right.

God damn it.

Flip, flap, hit it.

Stack it.

Let's go.

Let's throw together.

All right.

You're not leading with frame is number one and most importantly.

And if you're not doing that, you're going to lose.

You're going to lose, lose, lose, lose, lose.

What is he doing?

I fell asleep for a minute there.

All right.

Okay.

All right.

Let's go together.

Come on.

What are we doing?

All right.

I just got out of the gym.

I'm tired.

What can I tell you?

A little heroin.

Never hurt anybody.

So you're not taking the lead.

You just have muscles, but you're not decisive, showing the way, leading the relationship, getting respect by other men.

So most importantly,

it's the frame.

Getting respect by other men.

You're not getting your asshole tickled a little bit by other men, Chrissy.

She doesn't like that.

She wants to see you getting a little ball licking from other guys.

That's what I'm saying.

You know, you see a little ball licking, then she ball licks your balls.

Everybody's in on it.

You know what I'm saying?

Come on, hit it, had it.

Let's go.

All right.

What's going on on my pillow couch?

It's making noises.

I'm sleeping.

My watch is too heavy.

What can I tell you?

I don't know.

Go on these dates.

You're half hazard.

You're half.

Half hazard.

He literally nodded out half sentence.

I think he's on something.

Yeah.

Or he's really tired.

Yes, you're half hazard.

You looked up.

You're half hazard.

You half hazard, you cream pie.

You overwaddled.

You're underweighted.

Oh, what are we on?

Hey, I didn't do it.

God did it.

What can I say?

Positively.

Let's go.

Let's grow together.

Wow.

I can hear tweedly music in the background.

He just falls asleep halfway through.

Yeah, that's weird.

He really did just fall asleep halfway through a sentence.

That was a little weird.

Paul, but when she speaks to you, she could feel the weakness in your voice, the nervousness.

You're still asking her where she wants to go.

The whole relationship is thrown off center because she feels no power in you, no fucking release of her feminine energy.

She wants to go.

That's right.

So far, I've made two points in my A to Z.

Number one was tell her where to go.

Number two was tell her where to go.

No.

Number three is tell her where to go.

I'm a little foreshadowing there.

You don't know what that means.

Shut up.

Do you know?

Fucking leave it at the door.

He'll take care of it.

None of that energy.

So all that muscle means nothing.

You have to own it.

You have to own who you are.

And it's not about money.

It's about everything but money.

It's about lead control on it.

I'm looking at the pillows.

Yeah, I'm looking at the pillows.

They're jumping from one side to the other.

What can I say?

I didn't do it.

God did it.

I got ghosts in my house.

Where's Theresa Caputo when you need her?

That broad come come over here and she'd figure out where the ghosts are.

Look, I got dollar bill pillows.

They are.

Oh my God.

He's got throw pillows that have George Washington on them.

And the other one is a $100 bill.

Oh, that's classic.

Where did you get those?

Pottery Barn?

I don't think they're selling them.

No.

Kmart.

Respect integrity.

So a few dates in, you're still acting lackluster.

Barely wants to sleep with you.

Wait until three, four, five, six dates to even get laid for the first time.

It's a massive lack of confidence in itself.

So you're just dropping the ball in all avenues, man.

You need to.

You're dropping the ball when you should be dropping your balls.

You know what I'm saying?

You got to drop a nut.

First one, two dates.

I just got to do it.

You got to tell her, hey, I don't care what you want to eat.

We're going to have some pizza.

We're going to flip it, flap it, let it go.

I'm going to drop a little jizz on you, and then I'm going to make a video.

I'm going to take a nippy nap.

And when I get up, I expect this place to be clean.

Put those dollar bill pillows back.

I know it's our first date, and it's a blind one at that, but I'm going to need my room clean and go upstairs, make some ragu with my mom.

Chop, chop.

I need some vasava.

Lead and lead from the front and lead strong.

She never advanced with sexual nature, touch, and things of this nature.

You don't flirt properly.

You don't fucking put energy on her.

You're soft.

You're weak.

You're scared to think and talk about sexual.

Wow.

Wow.

Even I'm getting turned on by this guy.

You don't fucking lead.

You don't touch her.

Things of that nature.

You don't grab her breasts in the car at a stop sign.

What are you doing?

You don't stick your tongue directly down her throat all the way.

That's what you got to do.

I don't know what to do.

Sorry, I had to take a nippy nap there.

Mommy didn't put me to bed tonight.

What can I tell you?

All you want.

A thousand bucks.

He is videotaping this from the basement of his mom's house.

Oh, yeah.

You don't care about sex, you get sex.

So when I'm on a date with a chick, I would say, Lynn,

Sorry, what was I?

Was I talking about this or what was I going on?

I don't know.

Flip it, flap it, hit that subscribe button.

Let's go together.

Let's go together.

All right.

Come on.

I don't know what to tell you.

Wow.

This is great.

All right.

We'll be back.

We're going to take a break.

Stay tuned.

Why don't you text us and we can text back?

And then you can text us in reply, then so on.

It's a fun fun little game I've been playing.

And I think you'll be great at it.

212-433-3TCB.

That's 212-433-3822.

You could leave a message too.

If you do, maybe you'll end up being the voice of the show.

But be warned, the pay is not great.

You could go to the website and drop us an email also, tcbpodcast.com.

And while you're there, you can get a free sticker.

Who doesn't want a free sticker?

Just go to the contact us button and ask for one.

Follow us on Insta at thecommercial break and watch the episodes at youtube.com slash thecommercial break.

Now I'm gonna go back to that texting game.

You wanna play?

Come on.

Bye.

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All right, we're back with Pizza Pazzooli, Poio, PUA.

Here we are.

All right, PUA, Pizza Pazzole.

I'm here with you.

Let me tell you the rest of this story before I fall back asleep.

All right.

I got my couch cushions set.

I'm ready to go.

I don't know.

What are you talking about?

You know, if it goes there, it goes there.

I just want to have chemistry.

I'm more of the type that, you know, has sexual energy and intellectual nature i'm not worried about none of that i got sexual energy and intellectual nature i like to talk about your tits all the time i know what they are the breasticles that's what my mommy calls them the mammary glands the milk comes out of them i know i saw national geographic when i was a kid what do you think i'm intellectual all the time

so i got a problem i'm on some medication what can i tell you i got my dick shank and then it grew and now i'm here you got to lead with the frame that's what you got to do you got to tell them where to go crazy tell them where to go i don't know what you want me to do god said it i didn't say it.

On submission, positively.

I'm doing things.

I'm touching, talking about the workout we're going to have and things of nature.

I'm always running my friend.

I'm going to work you out.

You're not going to understand.

I'm going to get your glutes.

Oh, my God.

I'm going to get your glutes and your boots.

I'm touching you.

We talk about working out.

That's right.

I'm going to get your labia and your labia.

I'm going to get it off.

Don't worry about it.

I'm going to lead you.

I got a frame.

I'm going to lead you.

I'm going to lead with my frame.

Here I go.

Ready?

Just give me a second.

I got to take a little nap.

I'm so tired.

I've been up all day trying to make this video.

video.

I've been up since 1 p.m.

trying to make this video.

It's already 2.30.

I'm hungry.

What can I say?

I got to get another protein chick.

First date kiss shit.

You know, listen, I could tell you really want to kiss me right now.

Listen, the way you're looking at me right now, I could tell you really want to kiss me.

It's going to make me real uncomfortable if you don't.

He is wasted.

Yeah.

Something.

Something.

Bro, you're wasted.

I don't know what it is.

I don't know if it's medication that you're prescribed.

You may be a narcoleptic, but your eyes are straight fading.

And I've known enough and I've seen enough.

I know one when I see one.

That's all I got to say.

Back to the video.

Hurry up.

I'm about to go down.

That's why he's got the pillow next to him.

All right, guys.

Just so he can take a nap.

Do something about it right now.

Plus, it's going to worry me about our future and if you're going to take action on anything we need to do, baby.

So lines like this, but instead, you're telling about your work, your travel, your dog, and nothing in relation of sexual energy, bringing tension, exciting this girl's life so that she never wants wants to go anywhere.

What is he talking about?

I don't know.

I'm surprised this channel doesn't have a million followers yet.

Really?

You're talking about your dog.

You're talking about lunch.

You're talking about whatever.

I'm talking about my dick and your vagina.

What are we talking about?

I'm going to work you out, and then I'm going to work you up, and then I'm going to take a nigga little nappy, and then mommy's going to make me her famous ragu, and we're going to have some bread and fasafu.

You're going to go home.

I got to go down to my bed.

It's a single.

What do you want me to do?

I'm still living in my mom's basement.

You mad at that?

Don't be mad at that.

It's not me.

It's God.

God told me.

God said, live with my parents for the rest of my life.

What can I tell you?

I don't like you.

You like me?

Okay, let's go.

I'm going to make a video real quick.

I'll talk to you later.

I got to go work out.

We're ever again outside on a date with you.

And then you go three, four, five, six dates in, barely having sex.

Even after you've had sex, you don't keep a girl retainer because your sex is weak.

You got to do it anywhere and everywhere, in a car, in a spot, in the bathroom.

As soon as she walks in the door.

As soon as she walks in the door, boom.

In the spot.

Where?

The restaurant.

In the spot.

Oh my God.

Wow.

I love, love, love guys like this.

Oh, yeah.

I've had so many friends with this exact same accent.

And I love them.

I had a guy, a guy that I worked with.

His name was Corey.

I loved Corey.

Corey introduced me to David Mammet, the famous playwright, his books.

And I just fell in love with David Mammot and his books.

And Corey knew how to recite these, but he had this exact same accent, this exact same build.

He lived with his mom.

I mean, the whole nine yards, right?

And I loved him.

Highly intelligent, really sweet guy, very creative.

But these guys are so fucking funny.

Only they have the spot.

But the spot really means any, it could be anywhere.

It could be the restaurant, the place where we meet.

Small bathroom, bedroom.

You gotta hit him at the spot.

Yeah, hit him at the spot.

Hit him at the spot.

Throw over the counter.

Kinky shit.

No hedge is fucking, bro.

And we'll talk about that whack pussy shit later.

Let's talk about that whack pussy and shit.

No head.

I don't want no head.

Oh, my God.

I want to stick my tongue down your throat.

You seen the picture?

Let me show you the picture.

That's how I like it.

The man.

Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck.

Anywhere, every time.

I like how that was edited.

I know.

I like how he had to cut three fucks into an edit.

Was I saying?

Uh, fuck,

fuck, fuck.

Uh, fuck.

I'll edit it together later.

Mess a hair up.

Masculine, but in control.

And this level, but not needing it like a cornbowl, but it should be nasty, bro.

And this shouldn't.

This is amazing.

This guy.

Oh, man.

And here's the thing: there are plenty of suitors out there for him that are getting turned on by every word he's saying.

They just love it.

They love this shit.

They just, they think it's great that he's going to throw them against the counter and make it messy and do it in the spot.

Never end.

You should never live together.

So it always stays like this.

My whole script and playbook is going to change the game on how to keep a girl forever.

He's going to change the game on how to keep a girl.

That's right.

You never live with him.

Never.

Always with mommy, never with them.

Mommy does your mommy makes your bed.

Your girlfriend doesn't.

You know what I'm saying, Chrissy?

I didn't make up the rules.

God made up the rules.

It says in Corinthians or some shit like that.

It says, make your bed.

Don't make your bed.

Mommy make your bed, not your girlfriend.

You know what I'm saying?

Don't live with them.

Ever.

Don't do that.

That's a recipe for the whole relationship to go downhill.

You can fuck them in your mom's house, fuck them in the spot, fuck them in the bathroom, fuck them in the Portaloo.

I don't care.

Get them wherever you get them.

Throw them over the counter.

Throw them over the dog bed.

Throw them over the balcony.

throw him over the balcony, make sure you pick him up, bring them back inside, clean them up a little bit, fuck him again.

That's how I do it.

And even in a marriage frame, we'll have the party, not the paper sign, but it's going to keep it like nobody's business ever.

I'm going to be the best ever to create this shit.

Okay, you understand me?

What is wrong with his eyes?

He is.

He's fading out.

That looks like he's fading out.

That looks like an opiate or diazepam reaction to being over-medicated.

Like he's on pain medicine.

I don't know.

I mean, I don't know.

I'm just saying.

There's something.

I've seen people in this state.

We've all

not all of us, but some of us have had surgery where they give you high doses of medication.

You do what's called fading out.

You're mid-sentence, and then you feel an overwhelming urge to close your eyes.

But you're not really closing them.

They're actually rolling in the back of your head.

And that's what's going on with this guy.

So it's nasty with it.

No games, okay?

But you need.

Okay.

He said, okay.

To control everything A to Z, switching the places, toys in there, you know, things she's never done before.

Not in a weird way, but you know, just using it on one spot where you're hitting it in the other spot.

Not in a weird way.

You got to bring in a chimpanzee, maybe a couple of zebras, a small car, but not in a weird way.

You got to keep it.

Not in a weird way.

You don't want to scare her off.

But you put one toy in her mouth, one toy in her ass, get a zebra to hit her tits.

You know what I'm saying?

Not in a weird way.

Don't make it weird, Chrissy.

It's not weird.

God said it.

It's in the submission.

Flap it, flip it, let's go.

Let's go together.

Let's grow together.

Come on, I'm going to go.

What happened to one, the one and two, three points?

I don't know.

I fell asleep a little while ago.

I forgot all about it.

The thing she's never done before, sexing it up, you know, in there and in the beginning before it gets there, advancing it to there in a masculine, strong way, or being respectful.

Wow.

He is a mouthful of words without any thoughts.

These are literally words strung together.

Nature.

You guys are just weak, and then you get into it and you don't want to worry about it too much.

And sex is a huge advancement in a relationship, and you need to take it seriously.

And it's a big part in getting laid to begin with and how to come off slow.

Sex is

a big part of getting laid.

I agree.

He said something that made sense there.

He said something that made sense.

If you're looking to get laid, sex is going to be a big part of it.

Take Brian's word for it.

I'm no, you know,

what is his name?

Confinova?

Yeah.

Bergino de Bergiak or whatever his name is.

But I'll tell you right now, if you're looking to get laid,

sex is probably what you want to do.

Oh, controlled, acting like you don't care about it.

Yeah, just come in for this glass of wine when you leave dinner.

You know, you can leave it 10 minutes.

You know, I got to go to bed tired anyway.

Good.

You know, leave your shoes on.

Don't take them off.

Boom, because we're going to be chilling anyway.

And then before you know it, fuck, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom.

You're fucking.

Oh.

Nah, don't put your purse down.

I'm going to fuck you right now.

Leave the groceries.

Leave the groceries in your hand.

Don't worry about the eggs.

I'm going to fuck you real quick.

Don't take your shoes.

Boom, boom, boom.

Mom gets mad when you bring shoes in the house.

Just boom, boom, boom.

See you later.

All right.

Leave the wine.

Don't forget, but the eggs.

I need the eggs.

I got to make an omelette before I take a nappy.

Everywhere.

And then number three, you don't live like a savage.

In the beginning, Dayton Frays.

And in the beginning, she can see the weakness.

You work your corporate drop.

You do it.

Corporate drop.

You do, but you don't take any risk.

Where's the mentorship you joined?

Where's the life that you're leading that you're going to bring on to?

Where's the mentorship you joined?

What?

Yeah, I don't know.

I don't know either.

Where's a country you traveled to?

When's the last time you took a business risk?

When was the last time you got in a boxing ring and punched somebody in the mouth?

Whoa.

When's the last time you took a business risk?

When's the last time you got a boxer and punched somebody in the mouth?

Got beat up by someone twice your size.

When are you going to show fearless nature?

Like, you don't give a fuck.

You talk about being stressed.

You're going to down her life, not excited her life.

You need to live like a savage.

If they're not trying to kill me, put a gun through my head or put me in a jail cell.

I ain't worried about it.

Anyone, anytime, anywhere.

We're not going to get this apartment.

Whoa.

Wow.

Why did we take that there?

What happened?

Cool.

We're not going to get this job.

Cool.

They're going to take my fucking place.

Cool.

They're going to fire me.

Cool.

You need to live.

You're wow.

Dang it.

Foreclose on my house.

They're going to foreclose on my house.

Cool.

They're going to shoot me in the balls.

Cool.

I don't need that dick anyway.

Fuck you.

I didn't say it.

God said it.

Let's go together.

Let's go together.

Like a savage, fearless, and that rubs off on her and makes her just want to spread her legs and give herself to you because you've taken control of yourself and have massive discipline.

This is it.

Subscribe to the video.

This is the type that we're living.

Masculine frame, enticing, and exit, exciting sex was number two on the way up and number one.

But last but not least, the frame of the relationship and especially those first few dates has to be so on point because everyone's in that action.

You need to control that, guys.

Stack Jack while I teach you how to Mac.

Comment on the video.

Subscribe to the channel so we can grow together, man.

Click the link in the the description.

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Go to my Instagram and I'll hit you with some nasty new fucking content you've never seen before, but let's grow together.

Support me, supporting you, and let's do this thing, baby.

Oh!

Wow.

So much to digest.

I mean, I wouldn't even know where to start.

But I have a feeling we have a brand new YouTube channel that we are going to be all over like a Thank you to whoever that just sent us that.

Stack Jack, let it rap.

Let's go.

Let's go together.

I'm gonna teach you how to Mac.

I'm gonna do it.

I'm gonna hit you with some nasty shit you ain't never seen before.

Like that picture of me with the tongue down my girl's throat.

Oh, wow.

Guys like this, I wonder how much exactly they're actually getting laid.

No.

Because any of that advice, I mean, I know that there are girls out there that are all into this.

Yeah, but.

But Snookie is taken.

Snookie is spoken for.

So all the people from Jersey Shore have boyfriends.

So wow.

Okay.

Well, thank you.

Thank you for sending that in.

That was a good one.

And I will be following up on that.

Because hopefully there's just a gold mine of many videos we can watch.

I took a quick look at his YouTube channel this morning and he had 74 followers.

So, but I have a feeling he's going to blow up.

Yeah.

He's going to blow up.

This content ain't going to stay a secret for very long.

There's guys and girls like us all over the world looking for the next podcast hit sensation.

And we just found it, I think.

All right.

Yeah, wow.

I'm still trying to, my head's still reeling.

I'm still wondering why he was falling asleep.

And why the pillows?

Why?

Why the pillows?

I don't want to get them.

Just take the pillows out.

It would have looked so much better.

Stand up or something.

Give it a little bit of energy, but I'm not sure he could stand up.

Looks like he was falling asleep.

Yeah, he's going to hurt himself, fall over.

Whatever you're on, bro.

Take a little bit less of it next time.

A little bit less of it.

All right, 212-433-3TCB.

212-433-3822.

Questions, comments, concerns, or content ideas like that.

We would love it.

We'll take it.

We'll run with it if we like it.

We'll stack jack, flip it up.

We'll stack jack and flip it up while we whack it at.

I don't know.

We'll do something.

I didn't say it.

God said it.

God said it.

Yeah.

So hit us up.

Also, if you'd like to see a live taping of the commercial break, one of two ways, if you're in the Atlanta area, let us know via the text message or let us know you want to watch us on Twitch and Kick.

And we'll send you a link when we do so at the commercial break on Instagram.

tcbpodcast.com is the website and youtube.com slash thecommercial break for all of the episodes on video when they air here on the audio okay chrissy that's all i can do today i think so i'll tell you that i love you i love you best to you

and best to you out there in the podcast universe Flip it, flap it.

Let's grow together.

Let's go together.

Bye.

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