TCB Classic: WWZD??

Transcript

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Speaker 2 On the ServiceNow AI platform, CRM stands for something better.

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Speaker 5 They get what they need when they need it.

Speaker 4 Bad CRM was then.

Speaker 1 This is ServiceNow.

Speaker 6 I walked in the door to grab a latte. I paid $10, heard Arianne a grandee.
But then I saw him and his big doll. I felt my knees weak.
Here came the brain fall.

Speaker 8 And though I'm not gay,

Speaker 7 you make me feel that way.

Speaker 8 I hope it never ends.

Speaker 8 My My new Starbucks boyfriend.

Speaker 6 All my toes curl, all the feels come. My world of gold, you are my shining sun.
We love to talk sports and swim in pools. You like the patio, I like the bar stools.

Speaker 6 And we spill tea and we throw shade.

Speaker 8 The other tables might think we're gay.

Speaker 6 I don't really care, I I hope it never ends You're my best Starbucks boyfriend

Speaker 6 And though we're still straight

Speaker 6 You make me feel a certain way

Speaker 6 I hope it never ends

Speaker 6 My new Starbucks boyfriend

Speaker 8 And though I'm not gay

Speaker 7 You make me feel that way.

Speaker 8 My new Starbucks boyfriend.

Speaker 8 And though I'm not gay,

Speaker 7 you make me feel away.

Speaker 6 My new Starbucks boyfriend.

Speaker 10 On this episode of the Commercial Break.

Speaker 4 In honor of the upcoming WWZD event, I felt it was only right as we take our fall break to get you prepped for an experience unlike any other.

Speaker 4 And if you're not familiar with WWZD, what in the fuck have you been doing with your life? WWZD is an event put on by Zahn Perignon.

Speaker 4 And the double W's plus the ZD is an acronym for what would Zahn Do.

Speaker 4 And starting on the 29th of this month, you can spend an entire week with Zahn in a quote-unquote entirely experiential event where you will learn the art of seducing a woman.

Speaker 4 I'm not sure Zahn's learned the art of seducing a woman, but if this is how you want to waste your hard-earned cash, far be it from me. I've certainly certainly spent more on worse.

Speaker 4 Let me give you a little quote from the website here.

Speaker 4 The WWZD live experience is an amazing, interactive, and deeply experiential week where you, a small cohort of compatriots, small being the underlying word, beautiful models, and I will practice together, play together, and break bread together.

Speaker 4 I couldn't think of anything I would rather not do. One of the classes you will get to be entertained by is named Her Secret Garden, quote unquote.

Speaker 4 It's the art of conspiracy and metaphorically metaphorically sneaking through the window into her secret garden magnificent and so much fun says zon it's limited to just a few participants but i don't think zon's the one limiting that i think it's the participant and i couldn't find out any information on exactly where this is going to be held i imagine this is one of those let's put the horse before the cart and hey it's expensive to rent out those holiday in ball rooms you're gonna want to make sure you got enough sardines to pack in that can but zon does promise it'll be one of the most beautiful cities in the world how subjective and mysterious.

Speaker 4 So for you today on a TCB Classic, I'm proud to republish one of the finer moments in TCB/slash Zahn history, my whatever chakra. I-K-N-Y-K-D-Y.
If you know, you know.

Speaker 17 And if you don't, you're about to find out.

Speaker 14 We'll be back soon with fresh content.

Speaker 20 Bye.

Speaker 10 The next episode of the Commercial Break.

Speaker 20 starts now.

Speaker 20 The birthday in the morning!

Speaker 21 Oh, yeah, Cast and Kittens.

Speaker 22 Welcome back to the commercial break.

Speaker 21 I'm Brian Green. This is the beautiful co-host of the commercial break, Kristen Joy.

Speaker 22 Holy best to you, Chrissy.

Speaker 23 Best to you, Brian.

Speaker 21 And best to you out there in the podcast universe.

Speaker 25 I started talking before the microphones are on.

Speaker 27 I was like, nah, that.

Speaker 29 Professional organization, tip-top chip shop over here in Chick.

Speaker 23 Yeah, it's running like a well-oiled machine.

Speaker 32 Today, especially, we're just, we got it.

Speaker 34 Dialed in.

Speaker 35 Dialed in.

Speaker 23 We're dialed into the phone number that doesn't work anymore.

Speaker 36 Yeah, you know.

Speaker 37 We'll get there.

Speaker 29 I'm almost ready to present a new phone number, but not quite yet.

Speaker 17 We're having all kinds of technical misfires here at the commercial break, but we'll get there.

Speaker 26 I want to share that we had planned today, the day that we're recording this episode, we had planned not to record this episode.

Speaker 16 We had planned to have a very special superstar guest for a TCB infomercial, and we could not get him for the life of us, could not get him into the actual studio

Speaker 49 from the you know internet yeah technical issues i don't know what was going on it is a new moon today so maybe that has something to do with it oh well that's that explains that is the horse shit i was looking to excuse myself from

Speaker 41 boom boom bam moon psyche i'm having my man moon psycha

Speaker 53 I had some fippy-nippy bullshit that was on my Instagram and dig.

Speaker 9 And it was like, have you been to a man-moon circle?

Speaker 41 And I was like, a man-moon circle?

Speaker 58 well yes i think i have actually i think i've been to two or three man moon circle two things to update about instagram they went to the word of the day number one i found more you remember i told you it was it was this you know i think it tina or you we talked about the instagram reel i saw where the old ladies were at a party and they were passing around a plate of cocaine no okay it was tina okay so i saw this reel It was, I'm assuming, somewhere in Western Europe.

Speaker 23 Oh, you sent me the reel, though.

Speaker 38 though.

Speaker 44 Yes, and they were doing blow.

Speaker 36 They were like old ladies sitting at a table, big party going on around them with lots of, you know, different age groups,

Speaker 60 kids all the way up to very old folks.

Speaker 56 The old ladies were sitting at a table and they were passing around a huge plate of cocaine.

Speaker 9 And they were either sucking it in through their mouths.

Speaker 59 And then, like, you could tell, they were like licking their lips and like rubbing their teeth, just as you would if you had done cocaine, or they were sucking it into their nose.

Speaker 9 So either inhaling it or sniffing it.

Speaker 5 I just guess it goes to the same place either way.

Speaker 62 And then they showed them later on in the party.

Speaker 63 They were moving, dancing like a

Speaker 39 follow-up to that video.

Speaker 9 There is a second part to that video where more old ladies at the same party are passing around that same plate of cocaine.

Speaker 23 And I was like, this has got to be like Pablo Ascobar's family?

Speaker 38 Yeah. No,

Speaker 16 no, I think these were Western European folks.

Speaker 67 They almost look like, I don't want to say the word gypsy because someone wrote me and told me that was highly offensive.

Speaker 40 I'm sorry.

Speaker 58 I didn't know.

Speaker 44 They have it on TLC.

Speaker 15 I thought if it's on TLC, it must be safe to say on the TCB, but that's apparently not.

Speaker 5 But they looked like

Speaker 43 Western Europeaners, like, you know, travelers, something like that.

Speaker 5 So.

Speaker 46 Travelers.

Speaker 57 What do you want me to say?

Speaker 15 I can't say gypsies. What do you want me to say?

Speaker 58 I mean, I'm sorry if I offended anybody, but I thought that was a term that they use for themselves on the fucking television show.

Speaker 20 Okay.

Speaker 42 All right. I'm going to calm down, though.

Speaker 58 I understand it might be offensive to people, people, so I'm going to call them travelers, right?

Speaker 47 That's what they look like.

Speaker 64 I don't know.

Speaker 73 Okay.

Speaker 13 Okay.

Speaker 13 So here we go.

Speaker 44 And then I thought to myself, wow, this is either one big hoax video.

Speaker 45 Yeah.

Speaker 42 They're clearly sucking up sugar or something, baby lexative or whatever, or this is how you and I retire.

Speaker 58 This is where we go to retire at the Western European travelers parties.

Speaker 76 Where are are you going? Traveling? Yes, traveling.

Speaker 14 Travel to the parties where they just fund out free cocaine

Speaker 20 to old people.

Speaker 39 And I thought to myself, why the fuck not?

Speaker 56 Why the fuck not?

Speaker 15 Good for you.

Speaker 49 This made, honestly, Chrissy, part of the whole teen of this.

Speaker 62 It made me think about drug use in an entirely different way.

Speaker 42 You do the drugs when you're young. Test them out.
See how they go.

Speaker 41 See if you're one of those people that are going to, you know, die on the side of the street or manage to pull through.

Speaker 42 And then you do them when you're very old.

Speaker 57 Okay. Very young, very old.

Speaker 18 Because when you're old, what the fuck do you have to lose?

Speaker 42 You might as well have a party.

Speaker 26 Yeah.

Speaker 19 Now, my luck, I take one little, I start sucking it because I got congestion now because of the young cocaine abuse I did.

Speaker 42 But I suck that first line and I plop down right there, Widowmaker, right?

Speaker 23 Or, or we have a really good time.

Speaker 12 We go to a man-moon cycle and we get it done.

Speaker 58 And then number two on Instagram, I wanted to share with you is that because of these hippie-dippy shit that I follow sometimes, sometimes to laugh at, and then sometimes I actually

Speaker 5 80 hippies in a big circle.

Speaker 59 I'm assuming Costa Rica, Colombia.

Speaker 58 Nope, not on the beach, but that would have been nice in the forest, in the rainforest, somewhere.

Speaker 49 It was one of those.

Speaker 42 And they were doing the ayahuasca ceremony.

Speaker 19 They all had the ayahuasca cups, and they were all sucking it up.

Speaker 63 So the beginning is they're, you know, chanting to the new man-moon cycle or whatever.

Speaker 34 oh, boy, baby,

Speaker 20 you know, oh,

Speaker 14 whatever.

Speaker 19 They slurped down that nasty ass drink of ayahuasca.

Speaker 26 And then fat, then the quick cut.

Speaker 45 Now they're all out in the middle of the rainforest, tripping their brains out, throwing up.

Speaker 63 And it was reminded me.

Speaker 23 Who was filming this?

Speaker 45 The one guy who did not do ayahuasca that day.

Speaker 20 Yes.

Speaker 24 The one guy who was like, yeah, I'm good.

Speaker 52 That's me.

Speaker 52 Yeah, that would be me.

Speaker 23 I'm going to wait and see what happens.

Speaker 47 Listen, Listen, I'm going to let you finish.

Speaker 5 But before you do, I'm really cool with whatever you guys are about to do.

Speaker 66 Let me step back and film it for posterity's sake.

Speaker 82 You're going to want to see yourself screaming like a howler monkey because you're dying a thousand deaths on the inside, throwing up blood out your nose.

Speaker 57 I'm just going to be here filming it for Instagram because that's what you're doing.

Speaker 45 You're going to pop it up on Instagram.

Speaker 63 Yeah.

Speaker 17 Nothing like going through an ayahuasca ceremony to make sure it gets on Instagram.

Speaker 70 Yes.

Speaker 67 Unbelievable.

Speaker 23 Otherwise, you didn't do it.

Speaker 41 Yeah.

Speaker 41 Picks or it didn't happen.

Speaker 47 Isn't that what they say?

Speaker 67 Receipts, it didn't happen.

Speaker 31 Yeah.

Speaker 26 Word of the day.

Speaker 23 Oh, the word of the day today.

Speaker 48 Are you ready?

Speaker 31 I think.

Speaker 23 You ask me that a lot.

Speaker 67 Like, I guess. Yes.

Speaker 23 You're going to do it anyways, right?

Speaker 20 Yeah, you're going to do it anyways.

Speaker 38 Why would I know?

Speaker 20 It was Dwende. Dwinde?

Speaker 41 Dwende.

Speaker 72 Dwinde.

Speaker 48 Dwende.

Speaker 84 Dwende.

Speaker 67 Dwende.

Speaker 83 D-U-E-N-D-E.

Speaker 59 Yes, that is the alternate.

Speaker 25 That is the Greek word for Mondays.

Speaker 5 Do I get to the end of the day?

Speaker 14 Shortened to duende.

Speaker 85 I like that.

Speaker 38 Thank you.

Speaker 45 Okay, use it in the sentence.

Speaker 86 Let me see if I can actually get the real meaning of it.

Speaker 23 The duende behind his song comes from nature.

Speaker 61 The inspiration behind that song comes from nature.

Speaker 17 Inspiration.

Speaker 87 Inspirado. Inspirado.

Speaker 24 Why don't you come to your senses?

Speaker 23 Quality of passion and inspiration.

Speaker 90 There you go.

Speaker 27 That's it.

Speaker 87 You've been riding my fences.

Speaker 75 Sorry.

Speaker 23 That song will now be in my head for the rest of the day.

Speaker 34 Great song. What a great song.

Speaker 27 Desperado.

Speaker 87 Desperado.

Speaker 24 Why don't you come to your senses?

Speaker 87 You've been out riding fences for so long now.

Speaker 47 Riding fences. Never got it, but sounds, you know.

Speaker 45 Is that what it says? Yeah, but

Speaker 67 riding fences or making fences or something. I don't know.

Speaker 91 You're out making fences.

Speaker 87 You're out making fences

Speaker 87 because you're high on that meth.

Speaker 56 You better come down

Speaker 28 and get some good naps in you.

Speaker 87 I got some Mountain Dew and Dwenda.

Speaker 52 What is it, Dwenda?

Speaker 91 Dwende.

Speaker 87 Dwende.

Speaker 49 Desper

Speaker 49 Desperado. desperado lyrics.
Let's see here.

Speaker 18 Oh, desperado lyrics.

Speaker 19 Let me make sure that I get this one right.

Speaker 61 Lyrics.

Speaker 66 Because now I'm thinking to myself, I don't know if he says riding fences.

Speaker 34 I don't think he does, but maybe.

Speaker 12 Desperado, why don't you come to your senses?

Speaker 87 You've been out riding fences

Speaker 34 for so long now.

Speaker 87 Oh, you're a hard one.

Speaker 81 I think this is about sex.

Speaker 24 But I know that you've got your reasons.

Speaker 87 These things that are pleasing can hurt you somehow.

Speaker 66 This is about riding a dildo.

Speaker 20 I'm sure of it now.

Speaker 23 Or you remember that one episode that we did with the people who want to have sex with inanimate objects? There was a fence in the field.

Speaker 61 Yes, there was.

Speaker 15 You are so correct about that.

Speaker 48 Your memory hasn't gone yet.

Speaker 84 Your memory hasn't gone yet.

Speaker 83 I can't remember where I put my chapstick five minutes ago.

Speaker 16 Oh, that is the worst.

Speaker 27 I am terrible.

Speaker 23 I have 15 chapsticks and I can never find one

Speaker 41 When I go to get one, I have to keep one.

Speaker 24 I know.

Speaker 32 I have to keep one here just so I don't forget where I forgot to forget it.

Speaker 46 Exactly.

Speaker 47 I forgot where I forgot I put that thing.

Speaker 56 I mean, I'm forgetting my forgetting now.

Speaker 93 You know what I'm saying?

Speaker 60 I'll forget something. I'll go looking for it.
And then I can't find it.

Speaker 60 But then I forget what I'm looking for.

Speaker 47 I'm like, I forgot what I'm forgetting.

Speaker 52 It's unbelievable.

Speaker 41 I'm like, I'm going like.

Speaker 51 I hear you.

Speaker 60 I'm going three levels deep into forgetting.

Speaker 68 And it's really sad.

Speaker 93 And why does that happen? I don't know.

Speaker 95 I feel like COVID has something to do with it.

Speaker 48 I'm going to blame it on COVID.

Speaker 26 I like to blame it on COVID too.

Speaker 79 I think I have that long COVID brain fog.

Speaker 77 Or it just accelerated my already intense brain fog.

Speaker 29 All right, let's do some headlines.

Speaker 50 Universal music group pulling the entire catalog from TikTok.

Speaker 34 Did you hear this one? I did not.

Speaker 12 According to the Morning Brew, the biggest hurdle to get it,

Speaker 18 excuse me, when future archaeologists find the TikTok catalog, they're going to be so bored watching the post-Barbie homages to girlhood without the haunting Billie Eilish song.

Speaker 42 Universal Music Group, UMG, which is a music label for huge artists like Eilish, Taylor Swift, and Drake, said it would pull its catalog from the platform after failing to negotiate a new contract with TikTok.

Speaker 9 The app's nearly 1.4 billion users should start to hear the change today.

Speaker 58 That was two weeks ago now that I'm reading this, so it may have changed.

Speaker 68 You heard it last.

Speaker 41 Heard it here last on the commercial break.

Speaker 52 The commercial break.

Speaker 59 The change will be happening today in songs and videos as the old contract expired at midnight.

Speaker 18 This was February.

Speaker 50 This is like February 3rd. This happened.

Speaker 23 So what happens if you're looking at a TikTok that had one of these songs that's been pulled? Is it just silence?

Speaker 63 Yeah, I think it gets pulled automatically.

Speaker 42 I mean, I don't know for sure, but I imagine that's how licensing works.

Speaker 42 Like you can't then continue to gain views if you don't have a contract for those views to be played on music, to be played with that music.

Speaker 42 The biggest hurdle of getting a new deal was royalty payments.

Speaker 19 UMG accused TikTok of building a music-based business without paying fair value for that music.

Speaker 9 That comes after the app reportedly brought in nearly $20 billion in ad revenue last year.

Speaker 98 Wow, that's insane.

Speaker 69 Online safety concerns, worries that TikTok isn't doing enough to protect artists from AI

Speaker 40 are some of the other issues UMG

Speaker 18 discussed. The company pushed back.

Speaker 42 TikTok is sweating this issue, saying that

Speaker 42 there's a false narrative from UMG.

Speaker 43 It reached an artist-first deal with other labels, but this could represent a major snag in TikTok's future music plans, especially after it launched TikTok music back in 21 in some countries, including Ireland, Australia, and Mexico.

Speaker 43 They did that to take on Spotify and Apple Music.

Speaker 42 Listen, they already have the established user base

Speaker 59 to become the place and to become the place to listen to music because everyone's familiar with the app.

Speaker 32 It's right there at their fingertips.

Speaker 79 They don't have to deal with that fucking Apple turning on every goddamn time you turn on your car.

Speaker 69 And still happening to me today.

Speaker 34 I know. Yeah.

Speaker 34 The line of language.

Speaker 34 I know.

Speaker 34 You want to know?

Speaker 23 I'm like, I listened to that like three months ago.

Speaker 85 Why?

Speaker 38 I know.

Speaker 44 It's so random. It's so random, but once it gets stuck, it just keeps playing the same song.

Speaker 9 And then all of a sudden sudden, it'll play a new song.

Speaker 59 You know what it's playing in me now?

Speaker 70 Playing in me.

Speaker 56 You know what's playing in me now?

Speaker 23 What's the Dewinde?

Speaker 41 What's the Dewinde?

Speaker 18 The Dewinde is: I Googled, or I excuse me, on Apple Music, I searched for a remix of that Creed song because I was going to play it.

Speaker 39 So now

Speaker 3 I've got that, you know, whatever that was from the other day.

Speaker 28 Oh, my God. I can't stand it.

Speaker 87 I'm going six feet under.

Speaker 24 Maybe six feet under.

Speaker 73 Ain't that far?

Speaker 34 Boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom.

Speaker 34 Drop the creed.

Speaker 87 Drop the creed.

Speaker 55 You know, they're a Christian band who didn't intend to be Christian, but now we're Christian, don't you?

Speaker 59 She got all the young ones up in arms.

Speaker 25 I think this is a big deal for TikTok because I think part of the allure of TikTok

Speaker 84 is the music.

Speaker 9 And so many artists.

Speaker 23 A lot of people do dancing things.

Speaker 25 And so many artists have broke

Speaker 57 big on breaking bad.

Speaker 69 Essentially on TikTok.

Speaker 42 And when you can't then distribute your music.

Speaker 51 We broke big.

Speaker 100 Broke big. We broke big

Speaker 26 on the backs of nobody's music.

Speaker 25 On the backs of 33p,

Speaker 12 owned by no catalog company.

Speaker 23 Call me TikTok.

Speaker 22 Hey, UMG, I'm ready to strike a deal.

Speaker 44 I hear you and TikTok are on the outs.

Speaker 24 What about TCB music?

Speaker 28 The lime on the Lamb.

Speaker 41 Now, from UMG, the people who brought you music on TikTok, comes the unbelievable TCB music

Speaker 21 with such classic favorites as The Lion and the Lamb

Speaker 24 and Sonny Side Up.

Speaker 87 And you've been outriding fans

Speaker 87 for so long now.

Speaker 5 I think we probably put a good catalog together.

Speaker 101 The only place to get all your favorite music, TCB music.

Speaker 101 Listen to these classic songs.

Speaker 20 Fiddle diddle doodle adle.

Speaker 74 Who can forget Sunny Side Up?

Speaker 52 Sonny Daddy Up

Speaker 34 or Dying in the Grass.

Speaker 52 She was dying in the grass.

Speaker 102 Don't forget this Pearl Jam classic.

Speaker 31 The way Dendro Me Mad.

Speaker 101 All your forgettable favorite forgettable songs live on TCB Music.

Speaker 102 Hey, it's better than Apple Parkway.

Speaker 47 We've sung quite a few songs on this, on this show, I think.

Speaker 41 None of them remarkably well, but you know, hey, why not?

Speaker 23 Do a little diddy.

Speaker 34 Who can forget Rigatoni?

Speaker 47 Got your lover, got, got your lover.

Speaker 81 Making pasta, rig, rigatoni.

Speaker 51 Yeah.

Speaker 20 Yah, man.

Speaker 64 That poor bastard.

Speaker 35 I know. You may go.

Speaker 14 There's an episode of the commercial rig called Rigatony.

Speaker 63 Reggae Tony.

Speaker 20 Reggie Tony.

Speaker 63 Yeah, like reggae, and then the, and then the name Tony.

Speaker 26 It's probably episode. I don't know.

Speaker 32 It's got to be in the first 50 episodes.

Speaker 5 We were reviewing bad music

Speaker 100 auditions.

Speaker 44 And there was one from, I think it was American Idol,

Speaker 50 maybe in Europe somewhere.

Speaker 44 Two guys come up.

Speaker 42 They look perfectly normal, perfectly like decent human beings.

Speaker 26 But this is back in the late 90s, I think, early 2000s, something like that.

Speaker 79 It's from a long time ago.

Speaker 65 And the judges are like, Okay, what are you going to sing?

Speaker 44 And the guy's like, Well, I'm going to sing a song we actually made up ourselves.

Speaker 67 And he's like, Oh, okay, great.

Speaker 25 And the guy, one of the guys, starts off lovely.

Speaker 45 It's a lovely

Speaker 84 song.

Speaker 57 Yeah, he's like, I wanna take you home, I won't leave you.

Speaker 34 And the judges are looking till they're like, Oh, oh, wow, this guy.

Speaker 97 And then Rega Tony, the guy standing next to him doing nothing for the first six verses of the song, is like, Let you down, girl, get you, get your down, girl.

Speaker 20 Lick, you vova, lick, lick, yo vova.

Speaker 41 Yeah, yaman.

Speaker 96 Come on now.

Speaker 55 He starts like doing this reggae rap in the background, completely destroying any chances of the other guy to get in.

Speaker 15 And it was just so fucking funny.

Speaker 26 I wish we could have those guys on.

Speaker 53 You know, whatever happened to Regga Tony?

Speaker 93 That's what I want to know.

Speaker 41 Did they break big on TikTok or are they headed straight for TCB-

Speaker 72 I think the latter may be true.

Speaker 26 The latter is probably true because it's not hard to break it big here.

Speaker 63 We'll literally take anybody.

Speaker 26 As long as you can figure out how to get on

Speaker 82 our hosting system, we'll be happy to have you as a guest.

Speaker 5 Yeah, so I think big deal for Universal and TikTok.

Speaker 26 I probably imagine by the time this airs, they've already figured it out.

Speaker 38 Figured it out.

Speaker 34 Yeah.

Speaker 44 But it's a big deal even to pull it for just a couple of weeks because you're right.

Speaker 79 So many of those TikTok fads are around dancing and dancing to very popular music, not like, you know.

Speaker 58 But I wonder how much an artist gets paid per view

Speaker 63 on TikTok. I don't know.

Speaker 80 It's got to be

Speaker 79 thousandths of a penny.

Speaker 70 Yeah.

Speaker 71 Because

Speaker 57 when you are on Spotify,

Speaker 42 yeah, when you're on Spotify,

Speaker 42 Taylor Swift made like, what, like $100 million on Spotify in 2023 or something like that?

Speaker 69 Like the, she was the most popular artist.

Speaker 42 And then there's Bad Bunny.

Speaker 14 He was the second most popular artist.

Speaker 86 And I think he made like, you know, $93 million or whatever it is.

Speaker 17 But they had billions of plays of their songs.

Speaker 18 So if you're the average artist, like 33 Penis or Chopper

Speaker 12 Johnson, and you're getting, you know, I don't know for me, tens of plays every month.

Speaker 42 But let's say you're getting hundreds of thousands of plays every month.

Speaker 63 You aren't making any money on Spotify.

Speaker 86 You might be getting an $80 check from them.

Speaker 69 And someone's listened to your music hundreds of thousands of times.

Speaker 42 I can understand why you'd be upset because if you had to go to Turtles Music and buy a CD to listen.

Speaker 9 Yeah, you'd pay $29.99 or whatever.

Speaker 63 At the beginning, it was $19.99.

Speaker 69 By the end, it was like $29.99 for a CD, an entire album's worth of music.

Speaker 61 But there was a good chance.

Speaker 19 that the artist actually saw some cut of that two or three dollars from every sale.

Speaker 79 So if you sold hundreds of thousands, let's say there was hundreds of thousands of people generating those hundreds of thousands of views.

Speaker 69 There's hundreds of of thousands of people buying your music.

Speaker 42 If I do my quick math,

Speaker 12 you're making $57 million

Speaker 16 per CD.

Speaker 20 That's good math.

Speaker 20 I carried the one this time.

Speaker 41 That's good math.

Speaker 5 So I do think this is a big deal.

Speaker 13 And of course, UMG is trying to get their take, and TikTok doesn't want to pay as much, but they made $20 billion last year.

Speaker 17 Is it really a big deal to cut off an extra billion to the artists who are making your platform so popular?

Speaker 63 But you know what they say.

Speaker 69 You know what they say?

Speaker 86 TikTok is a Chinese-owned application, and the Chinese are known to be the toughest negotiators in the world, except for me.

Speaker 43 I am also the toughest negotiator in the world.

Speaker 57 If you

Speaker 63 want me to lose money, all you have to do is negotiate with me.

Speaker 17 I will make it tough for myself to make any money in a negotiation.

Speaker 67 That's how I roll.

Speaker 23 Buy high, sell low. That's your motto.

Speaker 38 Yes, that's right.

Speaker 50 Okay, Brian, we've come to the conclusion that your catalog is worth $10,000.

Speaker 65 Well, I've come to the conclusion that I'll sell it to you for $3,000.

Speaker 35 Not a penny less.

Speaker 12 And not a penny more.

Speaker 38 Okay, we'll check our math real quick on this one.

Speaker 77 Yep, I'm getting universal consent here.

Speaker 66 I'm going behind my manager's back to make myself an even worse deal.

Speaker 9 Okay, I'm checking in the boardroom here.

Speaker 60 Yes, we all agree.

Speaker 22 $3,000 and not a penny more.

Speaker 14 $1,000.

Speaker 20 I thought we agreed on three.

Speaker 47 Well, now I want one.

Speaker 51 Okay, we'll go down to one.

Speaker 99 I just need it in cash right now. Yes.

Speaker 47 I'll take $58,

Speaker 66 and I want you to PayPal it to me immediately.

Speaker 45 Okay.

Speaker 20 What about $30 and we'll cover the PayPal fee?

Speaker 24 $27.

Speaker 56 Okay, that's a good deal.

Speaker 60 Can you sign the contract?

Speaker 22 I already signed it.

Speaker 60 I crossed out $10,000.

Speaker 40 I put $7.27.

Speaker 23 You've already sent it to me to sign, too. Chrissy, just sign this.

Speaker 99 I mean, did you sign it?

Speaker 89 Take a picture. Get it back to me.
Quick.

Speaker 103 Quick, quick, quick.

Speaker 95 So we cannot get paid for three months.

Speaker 57 I need you to make that check payable to Georgia Power

Speaker 47 to Verizon Wireless Cell Phone Services.

Speaker 48 Phone.com.

Speaker 52 Phone.com.

Speaker 34 Oh,

Speaker 34 yeah.

Speaker 41 Well,

Speaker 104 you know, in life, you're good at some stuff.

Speaker 45 You're not good at others. In some ways.

Speaker 26 That's why you hire somebody else to do all the tough talking for you.

Speaker 63 All right, we'll take a break. We'll be back.

Speaker 106 Okay, you're probably wondering why I, Rachel, have taken over the voice duties at TCB. It's pretty simple.
Astrid asked me to shut Brian up, even for a minute.

Speaker 106 Well, lovely Astrid, your wish is my command. Do you want to help Astrid too?

Speaker 76 You know you do.

Speaker 106 Leave a message for her or me or Chrissy at 212-433-3TCB. That's 212-433-3822.
You can be on the show too.

Speaker 106 Just call and say something. Anything.
Or text us and we'll text you right back. Promise.
Then head over to tcbpodcast.com and get your free sticker.

Speaker 106 It's your constitutional right to a sticker and we must abide. You get the point.

Speaker 106 Follow us on Instagram at thecommercial break and watch all the episodes on video at youtube.com slash thecommercial break. Best to you and Astrid.
Especially Astrid.

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Speaker 76 Love that chicken from Popeyes.

Speaker 107 Limited time in participating U.S. restaurants.

Speaker 109 Hi, I'm Nancy Cartwright. You may know me better as the voice of Bart Simpson.
On Simpsons Declassified, we're diving into the mysteries that keep The Simpsons forever young.

Speaker 109 Have you ever wondered how The Simpsons regularly predicts future events? Who better to ask than the show's creators, performers, and writers? The celebrity guests.

Speaker 109 Be sure to follow and listen to Simpsons Declassified wherever you get your podcasts.

Speaker 110 This podcast is supported by FX's English teacher. Last year's critically acclaimed series returns to follow Evan, Gwen, and Marky as they vie for their students' divided attention.

Speaker 110 See why Cosmopolitan called its premiere season a masterclass of comedy. While Glamour raved, it's the year's funniest and most heartwarming new comedy series.

Speaker 110 FX's English teacher, all new Thursdays on FX. All episodes now streaming on Hulu.

Speaker 42 Do you remember I was telling you about how,

Speaker 78 or maybe I'll tell you this off-air, John Anthony lifestyle, the poi that we have talked about many times on this show, who pickup artists, pickup artist, who was just like a terrible human being in general, based on his videos, was a terrible human being.

Speaker 79 He couldn't even remember the name of the girl that supposedly had, you know, been running around town grabbing threesomes with him.

Speaker 19 Yeah.

Speaker 96 Couldn't even remember, couldn't be bothered to remember a name.

Speaker 77 He was picking up girls at the mall, at the jewelry stand, all kind of crazy shit.

Speaker 20 Starbucks, all kind of crazy shit.

Speaker 69 He is turning a corner on his channels. I've just been watching some of his videos, and he has been turning a corner.

Speaker 52 He is now a critic of other Pois.

Speaker 36 He is

Speaker 40 a guy who's just going straight at other PUAs for their techniques and their tactics, saying they're misogynistic and they're bad and they never work.

Speaker 12 I mean, it's quite the kettle calling, it's quite the kettle calling the pot black.

Speaker 14 I'm not even sure how that saying goes.

Speaker 44 It's quite the kettle calling the q-tip white.

Speaker 57 And I'm just saying that for.

Speaker 48 That's a good new one.

Speaker 73 Thank you.

Speaker 53 And I'm saying that from the perspective of a guy who knows not anything about picking up women.

Speaker 31 But

Speaker 58 I know that these tactics don't work.

Speaker 39 I'm smart enough to know that.

Speaker 42 I've got enough fucking common sense in my head to understand that this stuff just doesn't work under any circumstance.

Speaker 62 I mean, maybe every once in a while.

Speaker 44 Even a blind squirrel.

Speaker 33 That's a nut.

Speaker 93 Even a blind squirrel.

Speaker 42 makes his way to a tree.

Speaker 40 Even a blind squirrel gets a strawberry every once in a while.

Speaker 42 And so I just can't believe the corner this guy is turning.

Speaker 58 He's trying to make himself more presentable.

Speaker 20 Yeah.

Speaker 19 And I think it's generally because there's been a big backlash online about POAS and their bullshittery.

Speaker 42 It doesn't make sense. It probably was never going to work.

Speaker 79 It's taking advantage of guys who are obviously in vulnerable positions and are willing to do anything just to find some company, which I don't feel bad for the POAS.

Speaker 19 I feel bad for the guys in the audience.

Speaker 12 And I don't.

Speaker 83 That are paying money.

Speaker 98 to go through these programs.

Speaker 42 These programs are these guys that get wrapped up with Andrew Tate and his fucking money, money.

Speaker 96 You know, his scam kingdom or whatever it is.

Speaker 42 They're paying really good money. They're paying like thousands of dollars to get these courses that are 30 minutes long and include guys like John Anthony.

Speaker 79 talking about making out with three women at the same time.

Speaker 63 That doesn't help them get women.

Speaker 42 It just makes you feel better about yourself, John Anthony lifestyle.

Speaker 12 I'm keeping an eye on you, bud.

Speaker 42 I don't believe a fucking word you say. And I think if the money was in the Pois community, you would be back with them in a heartbeat.

Speaker 58 Well, you're seeing the tide turn and you have enough common sense up in this noggin of yours to to turn that corner with them so you also don't get the shit end of this.

Speaker 83 What's he doing now?

Speaker 62 He's like reviewing all of the pois on it.

Speaker 31 All for money.

Speaker 45 Oh, he's still doing the same thing.

Speaker 19 He's still going to coach you. He's just,

Speaker 42 he just slyly puts it in there while he's criticizing other pois.

Speaker 26 He tells you that he's the better Pois, right?

Speaker 79 But he's taking a little bit more of a soft touch. Okay.

Speaker 42 So he's doing these breakdown videos like we do of other Pois.

Speaker 11 And to be fair, I mean, not to be fair, to be fair to us, John Anthony started doing these breakdown videos of other PWAs, suspiciously after we started breaking down John Anthony's Pois videos.

Speaker 44 I'm not saying he did it because we did it.

Speaker 100 I'm saying that it's in trend, and I think he's just following the trends, like a lot of influencers do, exactly like we do.

Speaker 42 When it's trendy to talk about something, four and a half years later, we'll catch up to it.

Speaker 64 We just learned there was a pandemic.

Speaker 37 You want to talk about it?

Speaker 81 Trump won.

Speaker 37 He won.

Speaker 39 So

Speaker 42 last time we did a breakdown, and I noticed that John is now going after the 21 Convention.

Speaker 23 Oh, the one that we reviewed a little while back.

Speaker 45 Yes. Where the other guy, who's the other guy?

Speaker 3 Adam

Speaker 34 Warrior.

Speaker 42 So there are many, many guys that talk about the 21 Convention. The 21 Convention, in and of itself, the 21 group.

Speaker 96 It's legendary.

Speaker 61 It's legendary.

Speaker 18 It's still out there.

Speaker 11 They get at least 50 to 60 views per YouTube video.

Speaker 12 They are really doing what they get as many views as we do on our YouTube videos.

Speaker 13 Come on, guys.

Speaker 37 Watch a YouTube video.

Speaker 35 Is that really that hard?

Speaker 55 Could you do a favor for us, please?

Speaker 91 Pretty, please.

Speaker 41 I will literally pay you $1,000

Speaker 17 to watch 10 minutes of my video. I got to up that average watch time from one second to seven seconds.

Speaker 42 So the 21 Convention apparently is a big deal in this community, and it's a whole lifestyle.

Speaker 16 Like, it's not just about.

Speaker 70 Of course it is.

Speaker 86 Yeah, it's not just about picking up women.

Speaker 17 It's about being a man and asserting yourself and taking control of the family.

Speaker 23 Having the right lighting.

Speaker 67 Yeah, having the right lighting. Lamps.
The lamps.

Speaker 23 I like lamps.

Speaker 93 I like lamps.

Speaker 58 So I went back and I watched some of the videos at the 21 Convention and I found a very interesting segment about what it takes to have that masculine energy that women really want.

Speaker 42 This guy is a one of a kind.

Speaker 62 I don't know if he came from the party in the woods or if he came from the Poix community.

Speaker 86 I think he's a good mix of alien light language and the Pois community.

Speaker 104 I thought we'd take a look at him. What?

Speaker 23 Spiritualness.

Speaker 15 I think that's what he's trying to go for.

Speaker 12 I'm not sure with any effect, but

Speaker 23 pay for effort. The man-moon cycle.

Speaker 45 Man-moon cycle.

Speaker 57 Just go for the man-moon cycle.

Speaker 3 The man-moon cycle.

Speaker 14 But I found it interesting enough that we should review here at the commercial break, which is a low bar, by the way.

Speaker 77 But okay, there we go.

Speaker 12 So I was trolling on the internet.

Speaker 57 As you do.

Speaker 18 As I do like to do.

Speaker 20 And I'm ready, just so you know.

Speaker 48 Okay. Yeah.

Speaker 77 You're answering me before I ask.

Speaker 93 We've gotten to that point.

Speaker 41 We're like an old married couple.

Speaker 40 Finish each other's sentences.

Speaker 17 All right, let's take a listen to what it takes to get that masculine energy that women are so attracted to. Okay.

Speaker 111 What I tried to capture in here.

Speaker 42 His name is Zan Peronin.

Speaker 74 Oh, right.

Speaker 41 Is that Perionin? What's his name?

Speaker 45 I don't know, whatever. Zahn.

Speaker 38 He probably says it's Zahn. Zahn.
Zahn.

Speaker 111 What I tried to capture in here, and it's so powerful, I tried to write about the energy of men who women adore.

Speaker 111 They get a free pass.

Speaker 111 I tried to write about what is it, what do they have? What is the qualities that they have? What is the spirit that they have?

Speaker 23 Why is he holding his pants like Michael Jackson?

Speaker 17 I hate guys who hold their belt button up like that.

Speaker 54 Yeah, that makes them look like you know, their dick's about to pop out of their pants.

Speaker 35 They gotta keep it in.

Speaker 77 Yeah, I gotta keep it in.

Speaker 40 He's wearing an entirely too small gray shirt.

Speaker 72 A t-shirt.

Speaker 53 Yeah, his dad bought all over the place.

Speaker 15 He's got a Fu Man Chu and a scruffy, way too wide goatee.

Speaker 81 This guy's got a look.

Speaker 38 It's like,

Speaker 66 I could have been Johnny Depp,

Speaker 26 but I went to Krispy Kreme instead.

Speaker 35 You know what I'm saying?

Speaker 41 I could have been the Johnny Depp of plus.

Speaker 34 Yeah, but

Speaker 43 I'm not going to make fun of teeth because, you know, teeth are not something you can control.

Speaker 18 He's got a gray V-neck shirt on, dad bot in full effect, and then he's holding his belt buckle.

Speaker 23 He's got quite a few bracelets and necklaces.

Speaker 80 As if his anaconda is about to slip out of the Amazon.

Speaker 98 And ring.

Speaker 44 Oh, yeah. He's jewelry up.

Speaker 13 That's a thing.

Speaker 42 That's a thing with guys. More rings

Speaker 63 like me.

Speaker 47 The more bracelets you wear, the more pussy you get.

Speaker 26 There's an equation there somewhere.

Speaker 111 And you know,

Speaker 111 if you start from here, which is the center of gravity as a man here, I don't want to.

Speaker 55 It's not the center of gravity for a woman, also.

Speaker 45 He's pointing to his chest. Okay.
Yep.

Speaker 17 He looks like he's about to kung fu us all into paying more money.

Speaker 111 About chakras, but if you do, imagine your center, whatever, chest, heart chakra. You start from an energy force from here as a man, okay?

Speaker 32 I like when you go to talk about the chakras and you say, whatever,

Speaker 34 whatever.

Speaker 55 Yeah, whatever it's called.

Speaker 50 I've studied it for 3,000 years.

Speaker 26 I am the last of the kung fu chakras.

Speaker 78 Or whatever.

Speaker 72 I was literally given my chakras by the Dalai Lama himself.

Speaker 45 But I can't remember what it's called. Whatever.

Speaker 56 Onward and upward. You paid good money to be here.

Speaker 41 Look at this Samsung TV behind me.

Speaker 39 They don't even have a screen.

Speaker 90 Like, you know, you go to a convention and they have the big screens behind them.

Speaker 82 Yeah, those big complicated setups with the stage and the lighting.

Speaker 39 Nope.

Speaker 42 They don't spend money on frilly shit here at the 21 Convention.

Speaker 79 They're just going to go get a Walmart.

Speaker 63 Yep.

Speaker 53 Please don't take it out of the wrapping.

Speaker 26 You know, the little wrap that comes around it, a little plastic wrapping.

Speaker 111 This is incredibly important. You start from here like this.
Your energy as a man moves out into the world from here. And it goes

Speaker 34 up

Speaker 111 and out.

Speaker 104 Like a breath? Just like my dick.

Speaker 24 Just like my dick.

Speaker 84 there it is do it with me yeah there it is there it was there's my energy right on the floor

Speaker 64 roiling around

Speaker 24 roiling around screaming thank god

Speaker 24 i was stuck in his dick chakra or whatever

Speaker 77 it goes like this

Speaker 111 And it's a beautiful masculine energy.

Speaker 111 This is you being charming, being humorous, being inviting, being gracious this is you saying would you like some more wine this is you saying hey can i get your whoa all that from your whatever chakra

Speaker 103 i didn't know your whatever chakra was in charge of getting people wine but that's awesome

Speaker 112 you'd like some more wine hey whatever chakra let's get to action what do you need uh let's ask her if she wants some more wine

Speaker 112 Or maybe one of those pigs in a blanket? Those are really good.

Speaker 72 Yeah, whatever, chakra, get to work.

Speaker 112 All right, all right, can we come up with a name, please? Whatever chakra sounds kind of shitty to the other chakras. I'm here talking to the anus chakra.

Speaker 112 And he says he's got a name, Amos Chakra.

Speaker 40 All right, whatever, chakra, get to work.

Speaker 111 Vote for you. This is you telling a joke.
And this is you, hey guys, nice to meet you. This is a great, beautiful, upper energy, masculine beauty.

Speaker 111 Charm, empathy,

Speaker 45 sympathy. Whatever.

Speaker 111 Humor, all these beautiful.

Speaker 91 Just breathe.

Speaker 66 by the way I didn't know that was masculine energy just to be polite

Speaker 82 yeah I thought polite was being polite empathy yeah empathy

Speaker 72 that's masculine I'm sorry I've got my whatever chakra turned off

Speaker 111 fuck you qualities of man

Speaker 111 comes from here and moves out into the world imagine you're on a job interview

Speaker 111 everything about you is high

Speaker 111 You're sitting across the table from the interview. Yes, I did this.
And even your eye contact is high. You can feel it, right? You're like lifting, you're straight up as an an arrow.

Speaker 45 That should be high, too.

Speaker 46 I am so fucked up, man.

Speaker 112 We're ready to go kill this interview?

Speaker 112 I got those dibbity dabs right in my whatever chakra. Let's go.
I'm gonna jizz out my energy.

Speaker 75 I'm just gonna jizz it out onto the floor.

Speaker 112 Up and out, up and out, just like the dick chakra.

Speaker 111 Yes, and yeah. And I did this, and yeah, and everything is high energy, and it's a beautiful energy.
It's a beautiful masculine energy.

Speaker 111 And it's needed.

Speaker 37 Okay?

Speaker 37 Is that the floor about to break?

Speaker 111 Imagine from the same set.

Speaker 28 Yep.

Speaker 64 The whole room that they're in is about to collapse.

Speaker 27 But whatever.

Speaker 46 Whatever. Yeah.

Speaker 20 You paying good money.

Speaker 41 I got my belt buckle on. It's my superhero belt buckle.

Speaker 26 As long as I keep touching it, we're all in good space, buddy.

Speaker 111 Gravity here.

Speaker 111 Your same heart

Speaker 111 or originating place.

Speaker 52 It's got that same heart.

Speaker 37 Is that a different heart. Yeah.

Speaker 65 Do you have any cue cards or anything?

Speaker 82 Did you think about memorizing this before you came on?

Speaker 55 Your heart. He's trying to say chakra, but he can't remember.

Speaker 38 He's like, the originating place.

Speaker 41 Originating place.

Speaker 66 You know, your center of gravity.

Speaker 77 Center of gravity.

Speaker 55 Not your center of gravity, you shit for brains.

Speaker 111 There's an equal counterbalancing energy that is necessary to be a man.

Speaker 28 This is your dick energy.

Speaker 3 Dick dick energy. Your dick chakra.
Hi, Brian.

Speaker 74 Finally, we get to be wide 3000.

Speaker 101 My little 33P, that's right.

Speaker 74 Shut up, whatever.

Speaker 102 Shut up, you whatever, chakra.

Speaker 112 Hey, man, I'm just up here trying to get some wine.

Speaker 34 Get some wine for the bitches so they can get drunk and I can get to screw it. Yeah,

Speaker 34 Wybrian3000. I literally got bottles and bottles slipping on my dick.
I am driven with Wine Brian 3000.

Speaker 112 Hey, settle down, be polite.

Speaker 34 Fuck you, whatever, chakra.

Speaker 112 Hey, if you don't settle down, I'm going to tell Brian you said fuck.

Speaker 78 Fuck you.

Speaker 74 I'm the new center of gravity around here.

Speaker 102 I'm on the floor banging bitches and having fun.

Speaker 112 You are so rude.

Speaker 34 God damn right, I'm rude.

Speaker 101 That's how you get the ladies.

Speaker 112 I thought it was being polite.

Speaker 94 He's lying to everybody.

Speaker 3 He just wants another thousand dollars.

Speaker 111 An energy that goes down

Speaker 111 and out into the world.

Speaker 101 God damn right, we go down, down into the interior of the vulva.

Speaker 112 Oh my god, you're so rude.

Speaker 75 Fuck off!

Speaker 98 I will not.

Speaker 75 I will not.

Speaker 111 It's low on the floor.

Speaker 111 He vibrates.

Speaker 111 There's a vibration.

Speaker 56 Can you feel the vibration?

Speaker 48 Coming from the floor?

Speaker 34 It's the floor collapsing.

Speaker 51 Can you feel the vibration?

Speaker 52 This Holiday Inexpress is about to fold.

Speaker 49 I didn't think this was going to be this much fun, but I love it now.

Speaker 111 Everything's about his lower.

Speaker 111 Your voice is lower. Everything's lower.

Speaker 111 This is your sexual

Speaker 111 desire.

Speaker 38 He's pointing like he's

Speaker 99 revealing

Speaker 20 something

Speaker 78 that

Speaker 23 no one's ever said before.

Speaker 46 He's fucking

Speaker 72 Sir Olivier

Speaker 99 doing Shakespeare.

Speaker 73 He's like,

Speaker 81 this is your dick energy.

Speaker 92 Do you see it?

Speaker 52 Do you see my dick energy? It's coming from the floor.

Speaker 103 It's coming from the floor.

Speaker 52 It's about to rumble up.

Speaker 20 What if he just had like a huge erection?

Speaker 3 It's time to show.

Speaker 34 Oh, yeah.

Speaker 35 That's what he was holding his bell buckle for.

Speaker 55 That's right.

Speaker 34 Put that center of gravity back in your little heart cavity or whatever.

Speaker 101 We're going to now vibrate the floor with our balls.

Speaker 74 Bing, bang, bing, bang.

Speaker 34 Fee five foe.

Speaker 102 Here comes my dick right in your bum.

Speaker 111 Which in the West is a bad thing.

Speaker 19 Toxic.

Speaker 111 You rapist.

Speaker 31 Whoa, what? What?

Speaker 55 I don't think you're a rapist because you have sexual energy.

Speaker 37 Right?

Speaker 34 Right?

Speaker 31 All right.

Speaker 31 Am I right? Right?

Speaker 41 Was I right with the rape thing?

Speaker 52 Am I right?

Speaker 55 He's trying to build a bunch of people. Is that what I'm saying?

Speaker 84 Yeah.

Speaker 77 The whole audience is probably like, oh, Jesus Christ. My mom told me not to come to this, so I shouldn't listen to her.

Speaker 111 This is you wanting to bend the world over. This is you seeing a heart-shaped ass say, I like this.

Speaker 77 I like that.

Speaker 74 God damn, right. Now we're talking turkey.

Speaker 34 This is you looking at a fat fat ass going god damn hard shaped ass hard shaped I don't care what shape it is really. I don't have eyes.

Speaker 34 I'm just a dick chocker

Speaker 111 That's your it's and I tell you this it's

Speaker 111 it's given to you by God

Speaker 111 you fail

Speaker 111 God women men society everything when you like

Speaker 111 Block off that energy, which we all do.

Speaker 23 You fail God, women, men, and society.

Speaker 78 Exactly.

Speaker 101 Right.

Speaker 3 Why do we have to get God involved?

Speaker 101 Shut up, whatever, Chakra.

Speaker 101 You can crush your little soul.

Speaker 23 He is all over the place.

Speaker 75 He is.

Speaker 112 He's not using his center of gravity right now.

Speaker 112 Just settle down. I'll get it back to him.

Speaker 101 My goddamn balls, you will.

Speaker 101 Let the tiger loose, you know what I'm saying?

Speaker 112 I do not know what you're saying.

Speaker 3 I told you to fuck off. Fuck off.

Speaker 111 Society has been taught: you eyes front, respectful, don't have any kind of this sexual energy at all. And it's wrong.

Speaker 23 It's wrong. No one's saying don't have any sexual energy.

Speaker 40 No one said don't have any sexual energy. You're taking it to the extreme.

Speaker 58 This is what all I've been watching some more recent 21 conventions, and this is what they all say.

Speaker 42 There's one guy that I watch on a video.

Speaker 44 He could not say, he could not have said fuck more

Speaker 77 in his conversation.

Speaker 113 He was like, fucking fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fucking men, fucking, fucking, fucking women, fuck, fuck, fuck.

Speaker 12 And I was like, wow, that's, that's super intelligent conversation right there.

Speaker 43 Sorry, I was just getting a phone call from someone I owe money to.

Speaker 84 And

Speaker 56 they're all like so angry because they think that this is how society has told them to be.

Speaker 80 That's not

Speaker 20 the truth.

Speaker 34 That's true.

Speaker 65 Yes, they do not. Society generally does not want you going around raping people.

Speaker 58 That's not the point. They're not asking you to not be sexual.
As a matter of fact, I think we could use a little bit more sexual energy out there in the right way.

Speaker 56 But just because you have a dick doesn't mean you don't have control over your dick.

Speaker 69 And that's the point.

Speaker 12 And he's playing into it.

Speaker 42 He's saying that everyone thinks you're a rapist just because you have a dick.

Speaker 39 That's not true.

Speaker 58 That is not true.

Speaker 42 Saying to men that they don't have control over their own bodies is bullshit. And it is proliferating the problem, not fixing the problem, my opinion, right?

Speaker 59 And guys like this are just playing into it left and right.

Speaker 43 So that was my serious talk for the day.

Speaker 34 Go get back to the dick chopper.

Speaker 20 Sure, I I know, I agree. I know.
You don't like it when Brian gets all fluffed. All right, okay.

Speaker 39 But first, a break.

Speaker 73 We'll be back.

Speaker 93 Well, you know,

Speaker 63 a break. Generally, taking a break pretty soon.

Speaker 89 I'm pretty soon taking a break.

Speaker 108 You make this rather snappy, won't you? I have somebody heavy thing to do before 10 o'clock.

Speaker 106 Hi, cats and kittens. Rachel here.
Do you ever get the urge to speak endlessly into the void like Brian? Well, I've got just the place for you to do that. 212-433-3TCB.
That's 212-433-3822.

Speaker 106 Feel free to call and yell all you want. Tell Brian I need a race.
Compliment Chrissy's innate ability to put up with all his shenanigans. Or tell us a little story.

Speaker 106 The juicier, the better, by the way. We'd love to hear your voice because Lord knows we're done listening to ourselves.

Speaker 106 Also, give us a follow on your favorite socials at the Commercial Break on Insta, TCB Podcast on TikTok. And for those of you who like to watch, oh, that came out wrong.

Speaker 106 We put all the episodes out on video: youtube.com/slash the commercial break and tcbpodcast.com for all the info on the show, your free sticker, or just to see how pretty we look.

Speaker 106 Okay, I gotta go now. I've got a date with my dog.
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Speaker 97 Okay, we're back just where you wanted to be today on your morning drive or your afternoon run or whatever, whenever you're listening to this at the 21 convention with Zawn.

Speaker 111 Your sexual energy that moves on to the, it's like, it's kind of like bass that floats on the floor. Boom, boom, boom.
And women can feel it.

Speaker 111 They can feel it when their energy of in the energy of a man. Drop the man.

Speaker 95 Drop the dick chakra.

Speaker 92 Drop your energy.

Speaker 73 That's so stupid.

Speaker 52 So stupid.

Speaker 111 Just that sexual vibration that floats on the floor. But here's the key.

Speaker 111 And here's the key.

Speaker 20 Obviously, this guy has never studied chakras.

Speaker 34 Never.

Speaker 97 He's happy to piggyfront off of it, but he's never learned about it.

Speaker 111 You need both.

Speaker 111 Both energies.

Speaker 111 If you're only this upper energy guy, which all the dating advice out there, all the mainstream media, how to be more humorous, how to take Toastmasters, how to be tell a joke, how to be more tell storytelling.

Speaker 67 Mainstream media.

Speaker 47 Come to Yuckles dating class down on 955 Center Avenue.

Speaker 47 We'll teach you how to tell jokes.

Speaker 95 How to pull endless flowers out of your coat pocket.

Speaker 24 And how to make coins magically appear behind girls' ears.

Speaker 47 Nothing gets you line.

Speaker 71 Nothing gets you laid like Chuckles.

Speaker 95 So come on down to Chuckles Laugh Factory and dating advice.

Speaker 85 He said yuckles.

Speaker 73 Yuckles.

Speaker 39 Hi, I'm Yuckles.

Speaker 71 And I too used to struggle with dating just like you.

Speaker 89 That's until I learned how to pull 14 people out of my clown car.

Speaker 71 Now I'm getting pusse everywhere I go.

Speaker 103 It's literally impossible to miss it.

Speaker 24 I can put a blindfold on and end up with two children.

Speaker 89 I'm getting so much pussy.

Speaker 72 Don't listen to those other whatever chakra guys.

Speaker 89 Come on down and you'll learn classics.

Speaker 103 Like,

Speaker 71 hey, what's that up your nose?

Speaker 87 Oh, it's a fake rose.

Speaker 66 What's on your shirt?

Speaker 28 What?

Speaker 75 Pull my finger. Pull my finger.

Speaker 52 Or the classic.

Speaker 24 Let me give you a wedgie.

Speaker 52 That's Yuckles.

Speaker 66 Clown Show and Dating Advice at 555 Central Avenue.

Speaker 95 Now under chapter 11.

Speaker 31 Yuckles dating, clown show, and dating advice.

Speaker 20 Clown school and dating advice. Yuckles, clown school, and dating advice.

Speaker 34 That's right. It's a good point, though.
Yes.

Speaker 78 Mainstream media pushing yuckles all over us.

Speaker 55 That's the problem.

Speaker 71 That's why we got all these issues.

Speaker 72 Mainstream media pushing guckles all over us.

Speaker 16 We need more sincere, deep thinkers and men.

Speaker 14 Like

Speaker 55 chakra, whatever chakra.

Speaker 33 Nothing says deep and sincere, spiritual and alive, energetic and manly, like whatever chakra

Speaker 111 just thing. How to be a wet a girl that

Speaker 111 take a girl on a date is all about

Speaker 39 a date, so I find a shirt two sizes too small.

Speaker 111 All of the instruction for men is how to be more of this nice guy upper energy.

Speaker 111 If you're only upper energy, when you say to a girl, hey, I like you, would you like to go over coffee? And she says, I have a boyfriend, you're top heavy and you fall over.

Speaker 102 You flint all your knees and you're like,

Speaker 74 See, I'm fucking duffers, whatever, energy.

Speaker 74 Sorry, I can't help it.

Speaker 112 Every time I get in front of somebody, I just fall right over.

Speaker 103 And you fall over.

Speaker 52 What is this, a Pratt fall class?

Speaker 103 You fall over.

Speaker 45 He's been to Yuckles, obviously.

Speaker 104 He's been to Yuckles.

Speaker 56 What he has not been to

Speaker 82 is fucking, you know,

Speaker 81 super cuts.

Speaker 81 No one's washed that hair in two years.

Speaker 42 Oh, God, is it dripping with something?

Speaker 102 You didn't mean anything by it?

Speaker 102 He didn't.

Speaker 111 I have a boyfriend. Oh, I'm sorry.
I didn't know he had a boyfriend. You're sorry because you had a boyfriend?

Speaker 3 Never surrender. Okay, I respect that.

Speaker 78 And I'm sorry.

Speaker 34 Never say sorry.

Speaker 74 Never surrender.

Speaker 85 I mean, what?

Speaker 74 Don't say sorry. Don't say sorry.
Don't say sorry.

Speaker 3 Sorry!

Speaker 34 You fucker, now we're fucked. That we just fell down.
You know what I would have said?

Speaker 3 I would have said, well, call him up and tell him you found a new dick to ride.

Speaker 28 That's what you said.

Speaker 112 How rude!

Speaker 3 Exactly.

Speaker 101 Too much of that upper energy, always making us fall over at coffee shops.

Speaker 111 My job is a man.

Speaker 111 So this upper energy is what's being taught. This is why we have a generation of nice guys.

Speaker 102 You're either

Speaker 58 in your basement.

Speaker 66 A generation of nice guys, you make that sound like a bad thing.

Speaker 67 My God.

Speaker 39 This is the problem.

Speaker 65 You make nice guys sound like a bad thing.

Speaker 56 Guys should be nice in general.

Speaker 29 There are times to show your teeth.

Speaker 58 It's not when you're trying to pick up a woman.

Speaker 20 It's not.

Speaker 111 We're playing World of Warcraft, not going out and meeting girls, or you're being taught upper energy things, which are good things.

Speaker 81 Yeah, nothing says nice guy like playing World of Warcraft all day long.

Speaker 111 But if they don't have the counterbalance of that beautiful lower thrusting energy.

Speaker 94 It's so beautiful.

Speaker 101 Oh, it's delicious.

Speaker 78 It's beautiful. So good.

Speaker 101 So

Speaker 101 good.

Speaker 101 You want me to show you?

Speaker 101 Come over here, Chrissy. With your apple bottle.

Speaker 112 Settle down. She's your friend.
Let's get her a drink first.

Speaker 23 I'll take some more wine.

Speaker 75 You want some more wine?

Speaker 34 I got that covered.

Speaker 112 Upper energy here. Yeah, see?

Speaker 112 Now go hoof. Woof's talking off now.

Speaker 101 Don't worry.

Speaker 3 I'll be thrusting that glass of wine right at her.

Speaker 111 The spanking energy? If you don't have that.

Speaker 57 The spanking energy?

Speaker 55 Someone literally just fell off their chair.

Speaker 95 They were like,

Speaker 24 Has the check cleared yet?

Speaker 20 Because I want my money back.

Speaker 49 You can just hear somebody running to the door.

Speaker 82 Let's listen to that again.

Speaker 49 Listen. Listen closely.

Speaker 38 He fell over.

Speaker 20 Spanking energy.

Speaker 55 Yeah, his nice guy energy just fell over.

Speaker 111 Then you're a nice guy.

Speaker 31 Yeah, he's too top heavy.

Speaker 111 Women are dating nice guys, and men are learning, okay, how to go down on a woman, how to, her anatomy, the reading all these books and programs and like how to please a woman.

Speaker 81 Oh, God forbid.

Speaker 55 God forbid, we both get enjoyment out of sex.

Speaker 111 How to massage it with right oils and candles for the right.

Speaker 102 They're pleasing women.

Speaker 20 And women say, I want that guy. Yeah, sign me up.

Speaker 111 No, you don't.

Speaker 51 No, you want a guy who just doesn't even know where the hole is.

Speaker 72 No, you don't. I'm a man.

Speaker 41 I know.

Speaker 31 Yeah.

Speaker 23 I know what you want.

Speaker 34 I'm just going to start poking around until I find something to stick into. You don't mind you.
dude.

Speaker 102 I'm thrusting energy.

Speaker 111 Is that guy?

Speaker 82 He's just, what are you talking about, dude?

Speaker 38 You make no sense whatsoever.

Speaker 44 So, guys getting educated about female anatomy to make

Speaker 39 the act of sex more pleasurable is a bad thing?

Speaker 20 Yeah, apparently.

Speaker 93 Massaging them with oils is not what women want?

Speaker 56 Listen, I am no Casanova.

Speaker 81 Trust me.

Speaker 41 No Casanova.

Speaker 12 But I'm also have, I don't think I'm going to be in a point where I'm going to complain about my sexual experience in life, my sexual experiences I've had plenty of them many of them bad woman and I'm saying I like that stuff of course you do Chrissy

Speaker 65 because I because this guy is just talking shit he just got paid $500 to get up there and give a speech he hasn't even practiced

Speaker 111 guy goes down on you for 45 minutes you could get yourself off in two minutes with your fingers what it's nice feels good yeah it's cool

Speaker 111 but you have no there's nothing in him that makes it makes you what is he talking about

Speaker 53 I don't know he went from chakras to going down on someone for 45 minutes.

Speaker 42 First of all, don't know anyone who goes down on anyone for 45 minutes.

Speaker 18 That hurts your jaw.

Speaker 28 That's just bad.

Speaker 82 That's just bad physio right there.

Speaker 111 This guy's incredible.

Speaker 77 You see?

Speaker 60 No, I don't.

Speaker 73 Nope.

Speaker 93 I have no idea.

Speaker 58 Just as clueless as when you started.

Speaker 48 Do you provide a handout?

Speaker 38 Yeah.

Speaker 38 Is there a PowerPoint to go?

Speaker 23 I'll call you back tomorrow and let you know about this proposal.

Speaker 82 Are there follow-up questions on this one?

Speaker 111 Nothing in us that makes women say, Wow, I can't stop thinking about that guy. He's never,

Speaker 111 he's never what? That's what's missing.

Speaker 93 Yeah, he doesn't finish his sentences because he doesn't know what he's fucking talking about.

Speaker 80 I bet these guys are all in the audience, like, ah, right.

Speaker 111 So, and if you're only lower energy, you're a creep.

Speaker 53 Oh, well, thank God you've got a good balance

Speaker 30 Because I don't know, I'd put you at the top of the creep heap myself.

Speaker 111 If you don't have it balanced, if you're the sexual guy, look at women's boobs, and you don't have a balance with charm and humor and empathy and kindness and full respect.

Speaker 81 Boobs.

Speaker 41 Literally crawling around on the floor.

Speaker 20 The hard ones with the hard words.

Speaker 41 I'm down here with the lower energy, getting ready to thrust my way to you.

Speaker 52 You just see guys on the floor just thrusting across the coffee shop.

Speaker 46 Creep.

Speaker 111 You're a creep. But if you have both, our generation has only upper energy.
There you go. That's what we have.

Speaker 72 Your generation.

Speaker 41 Yeah, there you go.

Speaker 20 There you go.

Speaker 34 Come to daddy.

Speaker 23 He has both his arms outstretched. There you go.

Speaker 85 That was the revelation.

Speaker 72 Come to Johnny Depp Jr.

Speaker 72 Come to greasy hair, Johnny Depp.

Speaker 20 Somehow Johnny Depp makes greasy hair look good. This guy does not.

Speaker 111 Welcome to my

Speaker 111 history.

Speaker 111 Oh, only upper energy. So afraid to show that we have this sexual desire to, which is a good idea.

Speaker 34 Yeah.

Speaker 72 I put on my magic belt buckle that I got in the lucky charms box.

Speaker 41 Look at me now.

Speaker 72 I'm dripping with lower dick energy.

Speaker 23 And Greece.

Speaker 38 And Greece.

Speaker 53 I can't afford a shower.

Speaker 47 Thank God we're staying here at the Halliday and Express.

Speaker 40 They promised me a shower in return for my speech.

Speaker 111 Thank God.

Speaker 111 So afraid to show it. In society, you can't say it.
Oh, no, that's bad.

Speaker 102 Right?

Speaker 12 No, you're not right.

Speaker 47 Nope.

Speaker 41 Not right.

Speaker 41 Not at all.

Speaker 111 Is this lining with you guys?

Speaker 23 Because I've seen a lot of blank faces out there.

Speaker 72 Because all three of you seem to be kind of confused.

Speaker 92 Is the lighting good?

Speaker 20 You can't hear me? What's going on?

Speaker 95 Because

Speaker 56 I don't see a lot of shaking heads.

Speaker 64 That one dude fell off his chair a couple of minutes ago and he hasn't recovered yet.

Speaker 53 He's just on the ground thrusting around.

Speaker 38 I'm just the AP guy.

Speaker 84 Well, then, is that one guy?

Speaker 92 Are you getting this?

Speaker 56 Is this landing with you?

Speaker 92 What?

Speaker 81 I'm sorry I had my headphones in in my conference call.

Speaker 111 Makes sense? This is why we're here. It's why we have this problem in our lives, which we're trying to sort this thing out.
It's why women are going, where's the real men?

Speaker 81 Every oh, they're at the 21 convention.

Speaker 24 They're all at the 21 convention.

Speaker 35 Oh my God, I almost spit my

Speaker 90 21 convention.

Speaker 72 Real men.

Speaker 26 Are they giving speeches at the 21 convention?

Speaker 24 The 21 convention.

Speaker 23 That is what I'm going to start telling my single friends.

Speaker 98 Yes.

Speaker 98 Forget about anything else.

Speaker 77 I've already been posting on my Facebook about it and my next door app.

Speaker 23 The 21 convention is where the real men are.

Speaker 72 Spotted 21 convention tickets on my next door app.

Speaker 75 I'm spreading the good word.

Speaker 111 Well, the women are saying, where are the real men?

Speaker 102 Women are doing both roles.

Speaker 111 They're being the man and the woman because the men are not showing up.

Speaker 111 Woody Allen said,

Speaker 34 oh, Woody Allen.

Speaker 85 Oh, Woody.

Speaker 47 Good old Woody.

Speaker 103 He stops right there.

Speaker 27 That's it.

Speaker 82 That's all that happens.

Speaker 72 You get the Woody Allen ending with no Woody Allen.

Speaker 84 Woody Allen said this.

Speaker 26 Bad, choppy cut.

Speaker 52 Wow.

Speaker 47 I'm going to have to find more Zahn.

Speaker 72 Zahn's good.

Speaker 23 You should always take advice from Woody Allen. Yeah.

Speaker 51 And I got, yeah, exactly.

Speaker 22 Nothing says lower dick energy like the guy who married his daughter.

Speaker 31 I mean, honestly.

Speaker 27 Yeah.

Speaker 20 Oh.

Speaker 21 I know they weren't blood related, but I don't think it matters.

Speaker 85 Actually, I'm not sure.

Speaker 60 He left his wife for his adopted daughter.

Speaker 85 They lived together. Yes.

Speaker 29 Now, has he made some good movies? Of course he has.

Speaker 22 Everybody likes a good Woody Allen fable.

Speaker 21 But I don't like Woody Allen.

Speaker 22 so sometimes it's hard to watch his movies now because I'm like, he fucked his daughter.

Speaker 47 That's not a good thing.

Speaker 53 I don't care what kind of chakra, whatever chakras you got going on there.

Speaker 23 Whoa, Brian, that was a gem.

Speaker 84 That was a gem.

Speaker 33 That's an insane. That was a Zam.

Speaker 14 That was Zahn.

Speaker 23 That was a Zam.

Speaker 36 We got to get Zahn back on.

Speaker 45 We should get Zahn on.

Speaker 74 We'll break him big.

Speaker 34 Yeah,

Speaker 22 Zahn, you want to hit the big time? You want an additional three views?

Speaker 64 Come on the commercial break.

Speaker 56 Give us that same speech.

Speaker 56 I wonder if we could get Zahn on.

Speaker 42 I bet Zahn would be happy to come on, actually.

Speaker 50 Yeah.

Speaker 20 Yeah.

Speaker 47 Well, that was terribly enlightening.

Speaker 60 I feel better already.

Speaker 43 I'm going into the weekend feeling great about this.

Speaker 35 Laughter therapy.

Speaker 39 Oh, I'm going to be thrusting my way into the bedroom tonight.

Speaker 31 Yes.

Speaker 54 I'm going to be dick energying it all the way.

Speaker 31 All the way home.

Speaker 78 Ho, ho, ho, all the way home.

Speaker 27 Hi, ho, hi, ho.

Speaker 29 Whatever chakra we go. There we go.

Speaker 47 All right.

Speaker 90 Well, I don't have a phone number to give you, but I'll tell you to go to tcbpodcast.com.

Speaker 44 That's where you find all the audio and all the video right there from one location, tcbpodcast.com.

Speaker 44 You can go to the contact us page for right now, send us emails, because we're getting our phone situation straightened out after our phone number was stolen from us.

Speaker 40 Don't text the old number because you won't get a response.

Speaker 29 Add the commercial break on Instagram, TCB Podcast on TikTok, and youtube.com/slash the commercial break.

Speaker 25 Okay, Chrissy, that was a good one. Yeah.

Speaker 104 All right, but that's all I can do for this week.

Speaker 31 I think so.

Speaker 33 But I'll tell you that I love you.

Speaker 81 I love you.

Speaker 20 Best to you. And best you.

Speaker 29 And best you out there in the podcast universe.

Speaker 58 Until next time, Chrissy and I and our chakra,

Speaker 47 or whatever chakras, must say, we will say, and we do say.

Speaker 3 Goodbye.

Speaker 22 I take a dick and keep on making it.

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