The Big Suey: The Strangest Hour of "Dan's" Career

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Welcome to the Big Sui, presented by DraftKings.

Why are you listening to this show?

It's a podcast that seems very similar to the other Dan Lebatard podcast.

I'm sorry, I'm not going to apologize for that.

In fact, the only difference seems to be this imaging.

I have been tempted in restaurants just walking past tables to grab somebody's prize that if they're just there.

That hasn't happened to you guys.

I've done it.

And now, here's the marching man to nowhere, fat face, and the habitual liar.

This episode of the Dan Lebatard show is presented by DraftKings.

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Tuesday is here.

I don't think we're allowed to use that music.

That's going to cost us money every time we do it.

Tony said we're good.

No,

this can't pay you how we do this.

We're not allowed music rights.

I miss our music.

I want music right now.

That's royalty-free.

You're good.

Yeah.

We found out accidentally from John Tesh yesterday during the interview.

He's like, you guys want to hear a funny story?

And he's like, you know that Monday Night Football song?

Like, that was just like a public domain song.

And we have access to certain like public domain sites.

And we like started looking up.

It's like, oh, we like pay a subscription to the owner of that song.

So we can technically use that song, even though it's a Monday Night Football song.

And, you know, we had a little talk.

And now it's kind of like, well, we're going to use that song until someone says we can't can't use that song anymore.

And then Jeremy took that as an invitation to come in today and write a bunch of songs that we don't want to hear.

Well, we've reached a portion of the proceedings where Mike McDaniel has lost 17 of his last 26.

And when the flames climb on this, you get these guys, Des Bryant and LaShawn McCoy.

These are the voices that sometimes shout their opinions.

And these are two of the least informed you will find spouting public opinion.

And they run over to where the fires are and they just shout into the fire.

LaShawn McCoy, the quote is, they don't respect Tua.

This is why the Dolphins can't win the big games.

This is why, because our leader can't be a leader, our leader can't be real.

The can't be real part is a note he's hitting there on purpose, that

Tua is some management guy, that Tua is,

that Tua is what here?

Our leader can't be real is what?

So he's saying,

yeah, I guess he's saying that he's not like part of the team, right?

He's not like one of the other players.

Well, he's management calling out, he's management snitching on the players for being late and not being professional, saying their fault.

The leadership problem is everyone but me.

Well, based on what Tua said,

I think he could sooner be accused of being too real for calling out his teammates.

And management, McDaniel.

the next day does not support what he said.

So that's why I say McDaniel really threw his quarterback out the bus.

And now Des Bryant says, I guarantee a lot of the players don't respect Tua.

Tua points the finger, and here's where he's got him, and you can't dispute this.

He points the finger, and literally, four are pointing back at him, and he got him there.

That's what they say.

That's not true.

If you point the finger, it's three pointing back at you.

Right, the thumb is pointing the way the finger is.

Yeah.

You need that thumb to go in the other direction.

I'm doing it right now.

That's one.

That's three pointing back at me.

What's throwing up a gangster?

What's levy levying with that?

Be careful with that.

Don't show that on Air.

Ship be sinking.

Ship.

The ship be sinking.

Both, really.

Yeah, that's what I said.

You know, Keurig's an American company?

Thank God.

I've been looking it up.

I thought, like, you know, the way that they had it, and they had the umlaut on the side, I thought it was like Dutch or something.

No, German, man.

It's American.

They're faking this.

And the inventor of the K-Cup, John Sylvan.

Yeah, get ready to hear what he said.

John Sylvan, a man who's a mass of fortune from K-Cups and all that jazz.

I regret inventing the K-Cup.

Shut up.

What?

Sylvan?

That's something you say when you're rich.

Oh, I regret being rich.

No, you don't.

Exactly right, please.

K-Cup.

K-cup.

That's not a respectful use of that music.

I think it is.

You say it's royalty-free music.

I say that music is royalty.

I think Tesh said that's the best sports song there's ever been with Cody.

In the history of this show, the one time that you're disciplined about royalties is when we're allowed to play it.

How does this guy come out with what face does he come out?

Cool, get it.

Does this guy come out and say,

I regret inventing this thing that's made me billions of dollars because of recycling that's going to be

great convenience?

It's nonsense.

He doesn't regret anything.

It reminds me of when Popovich was like, you know what?

I really wanted to be a D3 coach, and I didn't want to do all this NBA stuff

after $100 million.

Okay, yeah, you could say that.

Go quick.

How about the poor D3 guy who's trying to make a buck?

Mm-hmm.

Greg Cody just.

Is he okay?

Is he okay?

Come on, Bells.

Roy, he might need something.

No, I pressed the button.

He also grabbed the microphone, too.

I think, Roy, you got to help him with the microphone as well.

I'm leaning back.

purposely for the sake of my knee.

Jack.

And luckily, the microphone reaches me, so we're all good.

How is your knee?

Like, what is the state?

Have we gotten a report yet?

Are you going to have surgery?

Are you going to need surgery on your knee?

You're limping.

You're playing through pain.

You got that bad knee?

You're Olympian.

You couldn't make it yesterday.

You couldn't make it to the show yesterday.

Right.

I was on Monday.

I'm on twice a week, Dan.

That can't be good.

We're just looking at it on the screen.

Is that your actual MRI?

There's no way, right?

It looks like a Picasso painting.

What the hell is that?

Yeah.

I don't know what that is.

Looks like that knee's happy to see me.

Yeah.

Trick me.

I'll find out Friday morning whether I'm having surgery.

There's like mold growing on the middle of your knee there.

What does that even mean?

I don't know if Tony TC can read an X-ray.

Buddy, I've had more X-rays and more MRIs than you can even imagine, pal.

What does that mean?

The MRI is magic.

The one on the left looks like it's literally screaming in agony.

Yeah, it is.

Who's TC?

Tony Collatti.

Yeah.

I know what he's talking about, Dan.

Don't worry about it.

We're doing a different show here.

We have one theory because Greg doesn't know how this happened.

He has no idea how he injured his knee to the point of potentially needing surgery.

I know how it happened.

Old.

Well,

bowling didn't help GC.

Well, there's bowling.

That's a theory.

But this looks like potentially a wear and tear injury.

And we know that Greg Cody sleeps crisscross applesauce.

What?

Wow.

You've never heard this?

What?

Wait a minute.

You don't know this story?

It's one of the all-time classics.

I learned Greg Cody sleeps crisscross applesauce when I learned that he had mashed potatoes in his head in New Orleans because he drank too much.

And I thought it was weird then.

I revealed it one day on the show.

No one knew it.

And we told him he's strange and no one in the audience sleeps that way either.

So he just, you sleep on your back crisscross applesauce?

Yeah, and here's what's sad about it.

He can't be good for blood flow.

Like a frog.

What's sad about it is that instinctively I still begin to do that only to be reminded that my right knee won't do that.

I'm just picturing GC at like 11 p.m.

Just like, ow!

That's exactly right.

That's exactly what happens.

So if your one leg can't do it, you sleep like a number four?

No, I just, I resigned myself to having to sleep straight-legged, which is awful.

Do you ever sleep on your stomach, crisscross applesauce?

No, don't be ridiculous.

That'd be crazy.

But the other one's also crazy, right?

I think.

That's such a funny visual.

Others do it.

But so's the one we have, though.

That's less funny than others.

But the real one is also funny because

a really dumb vampire would sleep like this, where the joints and the bones are so rickety that they would decide to form over 40 years.

No one sleeps like this.

Danny, there's another layer to it.

He folds his fingers on his belly.

I do.

I lay so picture crisscross applesauce.

It's out of the way.

And then fingers lay on my upper chest.

He looks.

He looks, I'm not going to, I'll say it.

He looks dead.

Can I try what face-down crisscross applesauce would look like?

Oh, you have to have incredibly

loose hip flexors once.

Didn't somebody say that Roy had to bring him an Ottoman?

Didn't someone record it?

That's elevated.

Okay, but so

we get a shot of this.

All right, we do have a shot of this.

Weren't there warriors in the 16th century called Ottomans?

All right, hold on, Empire.

Hold on.

You're not in the right place, guys.

Look at that cake.

We don't need to see an old empire.

Your French cakes are emphasized.

This is crazy.

This is in Jay-Z with that.

This is inappropriate.

That is correct.

He's felt.

A Furniture store called the Ottoman Empire would sell, man.

Those are proper ankle socks.

Now do it normal.

Do it on your back.

Jack.

Jack.

Thank you.

Thank you.

Thank you.

Let's see.

All right, nothing.

Closer to the LED, Zaz.

We need to back you up a little bit.

Nope, you're going the wrong way, Zaz.

Wrong way.

Zaz, please.

We don't need to see more of this.

Zaz, we need to go more up.

Zaz the epitome of the message.

Zaz, I need you to be careful here.

Slack those fingers.

Zaz, all right, this is what I need you to do, Zaz, and I'm in a panic situation, okay?

We're a big, serious television show.

We're on peacock.

You're dangerous right now to giving us peak October.

I want to celebrate baseball and peak October, and you need to be careful with the way you flop around back there, but I want you to do it.

You just need to get closer to the LED, and I need to see you sleeping like Greg Cody slept in New Orleans when he had mashed potatoes in his hair.

And he, yeah.

Lace your fingers.

Good hips on Zaz, by the way.

Doing the crisscross applesauce to the front is hard.

Are you guys claiming that

this is the reason that the knees are shot because he sleeps this way and finally his knees have given out?

No, Dan.

So I've actually read the MRI and I'm looking at it right now.

I can see the small tear in the ACL right here, actually.

Look, that's not hit.

So right here,

this is the ACL right here.

There's actually a little tear right here.

You got to hold the mic near you so we can hear what you're saying.

As you can see right here, it's mic go down a little bit.

So right here, this is where the ACL is, right here.

Right here.

If you see that little shadow right there, that's actually the tear in the ACL.

What really concerns me is what's going on here, right?

Screaming in agony.

Is that the mold?

Discoloring.

Yeah, what I described as mold.

That's got to be like really bad arthritis where your knee is.

So

you got to be worried about that.

Why does it look like Toby McGuire is saving the Metro rail?

And ripped in half?

Yeah.

I do have arthritis as well, but most people my age do.

Yeah.

We're having trouble getting Zaz in exactly the right position that I need him in so that he is sleeping.

I don't believe, Chris, if you had to guess, there aren't many things around here that shock everybody.

Do you guys believe that if I throw it out to the audience that we will find a great many people who sleep this way, a couple of people who sleep this way?

He's the only person.

Or nobody ever who has ever slept this way.

I don't, none of us have ever encountered this in our lives.

Danny, I think we're getting 97%.

I think you'll get 3% of people.

There are just some people out there that mess with polls.

Yeah, rabble around.

I got my supporters.

I got 3% supporters.

But if you ever met someone else, you've heard to sleep this way.

No, but when do you have that conversation?

Well, that's why we're having it.

Hey, Jack, nice to meet you, by the way.

How do you, what's your sleeping pattern?

What do you, you straight-legged like most people?

You cross them?

What are you doing?

So I don't have that conversation.

AI says that this is not typically used for sleeping.

Sleeping in this position can cause spinal misalignment and pressure on nerves, potentially leading to pain or numbness.

The nerve of that.

Mm-hmm.

He's right.

Don't look at an Olympian like that.

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Don Lebatard.

He called me on my own podcast, he called me full of shit, claiming that I'm faking interest in the solar eclipse.

You do do this.

You love to just get excited about everything.

Okay, Junior.

Stugats.

I had to school you and explain to you.

He was going to take you to Augusta.

When I was 17 years old, Alan Sherry and I used to haunt the Bueller Planetarium.

This is the Don Lebatar Show with his two gods.

Nothing I could do for that damn bottom.

Okay, Roy, he's going to need your help because the frat boy's not helping us today.

Mike's a Mariners fan.

Bro.

Bro.

Jeremy's in the other room making chaos and music.

And Jeremy also wants to talk baseball.

It is unfair with

what the Dodgers have.

It's funny how unfair it is.

They can beat you more ways than anyone.

They're built specifically for October.

I've never said that about a baseball team.

Their roster is just perfectly built for October because they've got a bunch of aces who could pitch.

The starting pitching they're getting is like no one in the sport.

They got a complete game last night when there hasn't been one of those in the playoffs in eight years.

Mariners have a good staff, though.

Like, they can go pitcher for pitcher.

You know about that B-Woo?

I don't know about B-Woo.

You know about B-Woo?

Pitcher for pitcher strong.

B-Woo is very handsome.

Have you seen B-Woo?

Let's go to Jeremy and talk baseball for a second.

Talk Mariners, talk Brewers, talk Dodgers.

It is funny to think that the Brewers hit a home run on the first pitch and then can't do anything the entire rest of the game.

Springer did this in the Toronto game the other day.

Hit a home run on the first pitch and then they lose 10-3 because Seattle is America's team.

And Billy, is anyone here to declare that it's going to be anything other than Dodgers, Mariners, and everyone's rooting for the Mariners because it's global, because it's Japan Japan against America.

It's Ichiro might pitch, or me might not, because Seattle's got an enormous undertog.

Who's America and Japan versus America?

Because you said that Seattle was Japan.

It's Japan versus Japan.

But also, America is on Seattle's side.

Can I just tell you

a ridiculous way to sleep?

Ridiculous.

No, it's so comfortable.

Plus,

if I'm ever in a hotel that's got extraordinarily short beds

made for me, right i can sleep in a child's bed without a problem what kind of brag is that gc

that is i'm made for

you said that yeah i'm made for a short bed that's crazy man okay you know i'm not an nba player i don't need a seven and a half foot bed give me a five foot bed i'll deal with it why because i sleep the way i sleep it's perfect and if i want to sleep long-legged i have that option well not without rotting your knees out it sounds like they're creaking you can't even sleep that way your your

Your body's retreating to a frog-like form at night, desiring something, and your knee pain is making it so that you cannot do it.

Then why do I have a pristine left knee?

Ah.

Answer me that.

That is a good question.

You'd think it would affect both knees.

Yes.

Well, did you MRI the left knee?

No, because I have no pain.

No pain?

Yeah, I have the left knee of an Olympian.

Tony, I need to call you out on something.

Billy made a face.

Neither of us understood it.

You proclaimed yourself the king of the MRIs.

That's right.

And Tony rolled his eyes.

I'm sorry, Billy rolled his eyes at you.

What do you mean you're the king of the MRIs?

I know what I'm looking at when I'm taking a look at an EMRI.

No, but you also said you know MRIs like nobody's business.

No, he said I've had more

MRIs than anybody here.

That's what I said.

Yeah.

Which is true as a flex.

Not as a flex.

Not as a flex, just as letting you guys know that I've been through the machine, baby.

That's what I'm saying.

Yeah.

I've had multiple knee surgeries, so I know what I'm looking at.

There's been doctors that have put up knee things and been like, yeah, look, this is what's wrong.

That looks like that.

That looks like this.

Why did I tell you exactly where the ACL was, Dan?

Because I know.

Yeah, Tony and I can relate.

Thank you.

But you know what?

The MRI system needs a technological improvement.

We do, big one.

Why is it so loud?

I had to wear

earphones with bad music playing for 25 minutes because the technology, it's like you're

not sure if you guys don't get it.

They didn't have the Greg Cody shows.

I requested it and they're like, what?

So the way it works, my understanding is a bunch of magnets like spinning around in a circle.

But what else spins around in a circle?

Vinyl records.

And what happens when they're spinning in a circle?

Music is playing.

Why is it that MRI machines can't have the same technology as vinyl records where you're playing music with every spin?

A note plays.

Right.

You know what I just discovered?

I just discovered listening to my own podcast, I must have pressed a button or something

that whether I want it or not, it now gives me the words that are being said on my podcast.

I love that.

Except it misspells my own name.

Yeah, I hate that.

We got to rewind that.

It's so C-O-D-Y.

You record your episode and then you listen to it.

Multiple times.

Twice.

Okay, I listen to it the first time as a listener might.

I listen to it the second time

with a critical ear.

The second time I'm listening for things that we could have done better, things that weren't done, that should have been done, that I asked Yeti to do.

Not that I'm throwing him under the floor.

Wow, that's too odd.

That's too odd.

I mean, I'm like,

play what I just said, because we're an edited podcast, so I can say this in the middle of a podcast.

Yeti, play what I just said at

0.5 speed.

And then he doesn't do it.

So it sounds extra slow.

Yeah.

And he doesn't do it.

Wow.

It's called quality control.

You guys wouldn't know anything about that.

Thank you, Billy.

Billy gets me.

Yep.

I mean, Billy's a good producer.

He damn.

I mean,

crazy.

Thank you.

MVP.

Yeah.

Most valuable producer.

No offense, Christopher.

The Greg Cody show featuring Greg Cody worked.

You said a couple of things.

You're supposed to be doting today.

I just did.

Whiz.

He's correcting you.

What a doter.

Good job, Roy.

Thank you.

What's on this week's episode?

We have Dolphins legend Larry Little

talks about, you know, growing up in segregated America and how that went for him and

his life today.

Talks about the current dolphins.

Interesting.

He's got a new book out that he's pimping, so that's why we had him on.

When we did, I should say, I would have Larry on all the time.

We've had him on the podcast once before, and because of his current appearance, he is moving up the chart on our top 100 guests of all time.

But it's good.

I talk a little bit about my knee.

We talk do a dolphins autopsy.

So it's a fun episode.

You should have him on again next week.

Why?

Because you said you would have him on all the time.

Well,

you know, a figure of speech.

Okay.

I think you would crush it if you shared the stage with Hall of Famer Larry Little and let him lend your credibility.

What a lovely thing it would be if, in retirement, you and Larry Little started a podcast, just, you know, the two of us?

Yeah, just the two of you reminiscing Larry Little blowharding as he does, bloviating about the Dolphins because he's an old Hall of Famer who played the game when he was 260 pounds, Hall of Fame offensive lineman.

I saw somebody in Alabama catch screen pass at 360 the other day and line line up in the Wildcat.

He would have shit Larry Little.

Proctor would have shit Hall of Famer Larry Little.

I think Cam Scotaboo's 260.

It's insane.

What those people are doing with their bodies is totally insane.

Greg, can I make a suggestion for the name of your podcast with Larry Little?

Sure.

It's the little things

and that kind of thing.

I think George Kittle has the little thing.

The Kittle things, right?

The Kittle Things is different.

Yes,

and you just talk about the little things in life, you know?

That kind of thing.

GC, what about the Greg Cody show with Larry Little?

He would never share the stage with anybody.

How about the Greg Cody show with Greg Cody and Larry Little?

You know what?

I like that.

Yeah.

I like that.

Teaching that a lot.

Yeah, I like that a lot.

I've offered to bring Christopher in on the name of the show, and he won't do it.

Really?

Yeah.

Why?

That's crazy.

I want it to be the Greg Cody show with Chris Cody, and he's like, Because it's funny the way it is now.

Well, it is different.

What if you were to say the Greg Cody show with Greg Cody and Yeti, and then your name is Out?

Would then that bother you?

Also, not a good name.

Or the Hee Haw 3.

It would have music if all of a sudden you tied all the things together instead of criticizing Yeti's producing.

Yeah, I know.

Jeremy's involved.

Yeti knows.

He's listening to this show right now.

He knows I love him.

Well, Jeremy's been warming up in the bullpen for now two hours.

We should go to him.

He's also got some music.

What is his music about?

Because I need to tell the audience here: forgive me here for stopping the show in its tracks just because Ron McGill is, I'm going to say, if not the biggest treasure this show has, like, certainly

there aren't very many that are as big a treasure as this guy, guest for 20 years, always working for free, and super grateful for our audience because we are Zoo Miami's biggest donor.

Like, this audience

just really protects the animals in a beautiful way.

And he's having a giant party, but he hasn't been on the last couple of weeks because of crowded things here.

And I just want to make sure that the audience knows and that we are paying attention to Ron has an event that you can support here, and it's an event that comes with a discount to our listeners.

And it's a really fun party in Miami.

We've got two of them this month.

This is one of them.

Ron McGill does a really fun party at the zoo.

It's 20 restaurants.

Miami doesn't do great things like this, very many of them.

And we should support Ron and the zoo.

Obviously, I'm going to do that because I love that kink.

But

Ron McGill event.

We'll all say we went

even

when we don't

he's really danced friend

i think billy goes i think billy and mike have both had zoo experiences that have grown their relationship with ron migill

do i have this wrong um weird way to phrase it i've had a zoo experience or two

that have grown closer to ron migillation not entirely sure what that means that is are you an alien

are you an alien Are you

not a human being anymore?

Are you experiencing anything?

Is there a skinwalker amongst you?

Are you a lizard person?

No one talks like this.

Shit be sinking.

He's got a.

Are any of you going?

Because

that's how you say it.

There we go.

Much better.

Do experience.

Got you closer to Ron McGill.

Are any of you craving sustenance at all.

Am I hungry?

Teeth?

Lunch?

Roy, give people the details so that they can support Ron McGill the way nobody in the world supports Ron McGill.

Yeah, it's the Monster Masquerade at Zoo Miami.

It's this Saturday, October 18th.

Starting at 7 o'clock.

Folks, this is adults only.

Don't bring your kids, all right?

Ron McGill event.

All right, he can probably meet up with Rob McGill.

He's probably going to be dressed up as a vampire.

And he's offering this code Ron MM25.

that's r-o-n-m-m25 to get 15 off your tickets and you can find those tickets at zoomiami.org slash monster

do you go in a costume to this or there's just a costume concept like is is everyone expected to be dressed up or just some people are dressed up

a masquerade so yes

wait you cover the eyes yeah in a masquerade you wear a masquerade mask

those kind of things out that's like an a nice watch shop party.

That's my colour.

I always wanted to go to the Halloween edition.

Do you like those?

I like those.

I don't like those.

I want to be on the record.

I don't like those.

I want to go to one.

Yeah.

I'm with you, Jay-Z.

Hold on.

You're with him?

You at one?

I've seen that movie, BG, and I've always said to myself, I'd like to check one of those.

That party.

I just want to watch.

You know what that creep around in my cape, have a mask, no one knows who I am, and just head on out of there.

Well, I'm

trying to participate.

Trying to participate?

Have you seen that movie?

You know my style.

One of those big phallic noses.

Greg, you watching, you participating?

In the masquerade event?

Yeah.

I'm not attending.

Really?

No, I'm just kidding.

I might be there.

What if it.

Oh, that's such.

And wait a minute.

That is.

I might be there.

Yo, chicken thon.

What?

JC!

You're not gonna be there!

How fast you can't even walk?

Come on, bro.

Tell you to lock them off.

You pretend to be Ron McGill's friend and then you just grift off his stories for profit.

It's a whack lie, GC.

You write his books, ghost read his books, and take all the money because he's a sucker.

Ron McGill.

What a well-spoken chicken.

Ron McGill of Vent.

You've written two books more than you've written back in my days around here, just grifting off of Ron McGill's legacy.

A chicken using the word grifting, huh?

That's very impressive.

Ron McGillivant.

Ron,

we gotta respect that music more than that.

This can't just be everything that Jeremy farts out.

Ron McGillivant.

We have another event

that you guys will enjoy and go to because we got a Miller Light watch party and it is a block party.

We are going to the hood.

Alex Rodriguez is hood.

Our hood, me and Mike.

They're a home game for the boys.

Hey, audience, I got a special treat for you because I want to talk to you about Miller Light, but I want to talk to you about Miller Light with my good friend Rose.

Hey, Rose.

Hi, everybody.

When we hang out and we hang out often, we're friends.

I consider us friends.

Yeah, me too.

We're often toasting the good times.

And what am I toasting with?

With Miller Light.

That's right, Miller Light.

Whether you're hanging out with your dear friend Rose or at game day, it just hits different when you got a Miller Light in your hand.

From jaw-dropping touchdowns to fantasy heartbreaks, it's a beer that has been there for every moment.

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And it's just not the color of the beer, which is brilliant.

That beautiful white can.

How beautiful is that?

Is that you doing the sound of a can opening?

Is that your favorite sound?

Uh, no, it is a horsey.

A horsey?

All right, we'll stop doing that.

And here's a a kicker.

Miller Light is just 96 calories, 3.2 carbs per 12 ounces.

The original light beer since 1975.

That's right.

And still hitting different five decades later.

You're so good at this, Rose.

I know.

So, whatever your game day looks like, remember, Miller time is always a good time.

Look at us.

We're a great tag team.

Time five again.

Can you do that beer sound one more time?

And the horse sound one more time?

I regret asking you about that one, but the Miller Light sound is good.

Miller Light, great taste, 96 calories.

Go to MillerLight.com slash shan to find delivery options near you, or you can pick up some Miller Light pretty much anywhere they sell beer.

It's Miller.

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Blee.

Miller Brewing Company, Milwaukee, Wisconsin.

Sin.

96 calories and 3.2 carbs per 12 ounce.

On sess.

No, it says.

Oh, ses.

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Howdy folks, it's Mike Ryan.

Super excited to talk to you about the official ticketing partner of the Dan Lebatard show.

They've been a good partner of ours, and I couldn't be prouder of it because, folks, you know, I really use Game Time.

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Don Lebatard.

Surely every time you're watching this, you recognize that your wife is laughing laughing that

she married Larry David.

I do, yeah.

One of the great characters in the history of television, in my humble opinion.

And to my credit, my personality.

In my humble opinion, followed by, to my credit,

my personality.

Just amazing.

Pre-date, curb your enthusiasm.

Stugats.

Oh, wow.

I'm not going to say Larry David patterned himself.

You copy.

All right, put it on the poll, please, Jude.

You did Greg Cody copyright being an asshole long before Larry David.

This is the Dan Lebatar Show with these two guys.

So

I think I can say, I don't have this wrong.

Is Doral as Cuban as where we're headed right now?

Doral is not nearly anywhere as Cuban as where we're going.

Valezuela.

So, well, have we ever done what we're doing as our block party in the hood, A-Rod's Hood?

Have we done that in 20 years in Miami before?

Yeah, we did Miller's Alehouse.

Ooh, that's a similar area.

That's a Kendall state.

That was a Braylon Edwards Jets game.

Wow.

Yeah.

What year would have that been?

Are you a human being?

All right.

What happened?

Where is Dan?

That's a sentence.

Where is Dan?

Zaz, take a look at

pull off his mask.

It might be like

would have that been.

Braylon Edwards is just

one hell of a callback to say that the last time we were in Cuban, Miami would have been 2009, the last time the Jets had a wide receiver that anybody cared about.

08, I think is when that trade happened, 0809.

Didn't Ted Ginn catch a deep pass in that game?

So forgive me.

The place that we are, though, right now, with the Jets and the Dolphins, is everyone in the sport laughs at the bottom of the AFC East, which is being fought for by, if you're looking at the history of this league as a historian, Greg Cody.

The Patriots have dominated the sport for 20 years.

While the Dolphins were in a making a playoff game,

the Patriots were 7-3 in Super Bowls.

Like just asinine when you think about it.

Asinine.

Whatever the Chiefs hope to be, may it be as great as whatever that, it's not even half as great yet, even though it's done in a more contense time.

What that Patriots team did for 10 years is a total insanity.

During that time,

the Miami Dolphins, the Jets, and the Bills fought for the bottom of the division.

The Bills went 17 years without winning a playoff game.

And now the Dolphins are the laughingstock.

And instead of laughing at the Jets today, the country is still laughing at the Dolphins and talking about the apocalypse around them while Des Bryan and LaShawn McCoy don't talk about the Jets.

And speaking of the Dolphins, they're going to be playing the Ravens October 30th.

And you can watch that at Flanagans in Kendall.

That's where the watch party is.

They're going to have a Flanagans experience.

Yeah, October 30th.

I'm not, you're going to call me a homer for that.

I'm not being a homer to say that the only winless team in the league, the team that Miami beat, is the laughingstock more than the Dolphins.

Oh, the only reason I say it is because now you've added the gas of, oh, we know the Jets don't have a quarterback.

Oh, but do we also know that the Dolphins don't have one?

Because it's like,

the only reason the Dolphins would be the story today instead of the Jets is because, oh, dear God, they can't even get that the quarterback and coach can't fight in public about anything?

Like that, that's that that's incompetent.

That the quarterback says the thing after the game while everything's going down that makes it look like he's pointing all the fingers that way, and then the coach has to do the next day.

No, don't point him at me, man.

Come on, he's me misrepresented because they've all lost everything because this is what the lack of leadership looks like when you walk when you fall to one and five.

Like, my guess is it's not what it would look like if Tomlin were one in five right now.

Maybe I've got that wrong.

I mean, I think, sorry, Greg, I think part of it is:

look, the Jets have a first-year head coach.

So even though they're embarrassing, it's expected that they're going to be crappy.

The Dolphins, it's the same coach they've had.

It's the same quarterback they've had.

For the most part, the same, you know, Tyree Kill, it's the same wide receiver they've had.

And oh my God, they have completely fallen on their face from what they were.

So I guess it's more interesting then.

I'm just saying that Tua this past Sunday had the game-winning drive with less than a minute left.

He was eight for eight in that drive.

And then the special teams and the defense sabotaged the whole thing.

Why don't they kick it out of the back of the end zone?

Why don't they do that?

They got the ball at the 41-yard line.

Like, why aren't we kicking out of the back of the end zone there?

Special teams

defense just completely.

The Chargers did it after they scored.

Guys, can I just take the larger?

I know everyone's tired of the Dolphins, but just the larger conversation on what Billy's saying, which is: if I have Vrabel,

do all of a sudden the Dolphins somehow have a 4-2 victory because at the end of the game, Vrabel knows how to clock manage Bill Belichick and then all the other disciplines that fall after that.

If the difference between winning and losing is nothing, it's microscopic, it's air, even if you have a terrible defense, is one organization knows what it's doing and the other one does not know what it's doing.

No matter who the players are, if I say to you, the Dolphins were well run enough to be by some miracle today,

four and two because whatever.

They won the game at Carolina that they were leading in double digits and they won the Patriots game because somebody fumbled and they win the Chargers game.

If the conversation were different around all of this with the winning, none of this feels like this.

It's crazy to think about it from that perspective, that this team is epically bad and is going to prove it and all of them are going to sink in the shit of it, but it may not actually be quite that bad because they could be four and two if they were just run this much better that didn't lose all the games at the end that makes it so they make the tackle on Herbert somehow somebody make that they know that Ladd McConkey in the open field is a nightmare you can't let him go 40 yards with one guy on him unless you have no defense and can never stop anyone because everyone's going to rush for 200 yards against you like the idea that they with this much coaching you guys are telling me they could be four and two that's that that's that league though right like that's that league it's not like when the good team plays the bad team in college and the good team wins by 28 points the good team plays the bad team in the nfl it's a one-score game a lot of times like that's that league right well no and i mean the Bills game was also a one-score game until the end, also.

Like, they played them close, and the Bills have been viewed as an elite team, even though it's been pointed out by Juju, they haven't beat anybody, right?

So, like,

even if they were 4-2, they would be a bad 4-2.

We'd just be convincing ourselves that they were not.

They wouldn't be 4-2.

That's the whole point.

They would never be 4-2 because they're a bad team.

And you lose close games when you're a bad team.

The fact that the Buffalo Bills are still the betting favorite to win the Super Bowl tells you how even this is and how much there's a lack of a bad person.

Who do you put ahead of them?

Who do you even put ahead of them?

I mean,

that's just it.

There's like Green Bays up there, obviously, Philadelphia probably still, but there's no great team.

There's no dominant team this year.

In the case of Miami,

yeah, they could be 4-2, at least 3-3.

And I don't think it's all coaching.

I think it's bad players, particularly on teams.

You know, Chris Greer is the guy who let them start a season with the worst cornerback play in the entire NFL.

That's not coaching.

If I may, because we haven't done much college football, Lucy Rodin will be around here in a little bit, and I think Jessica will be as well.

I did want to mention that

the University of Miami, the last time they lost at home, was to Louisville, correct?

That's at Louisville.

And Louisville is a

14-year-old.

Louisville.

They're a two-touchdown underdog, And I think, tell me if I have this wrong, even though Mario Cristobal's team will be doubted, and we will see an ACC championship when we see it, but to date, they look like the best team in the conference now that it's not FSU or Clemson conference anymore, now that the conference is wide open, but they've got a game against a team that probably represents the best chance to beat them if it's not Georgia Tech on the remainder of the schedule because Louisville can go anywhere in any

any part of the country

and beat anyone on the right day.

They're four and one.

Jeff Braum is, I really respect him as a coach in the matchups that he's had against Miami.

He knows how to attack Miami.

That's you won't be easy.

That assume you won't be easy.

I mean, traveling on the road, you don't think.

We'll see.

But I think that this line's a little inflated.

You look across the nation, as impressive as Miami's been, you ask yourself, is there a team in the nation right now that you foresee going undefeated the whole way through?

I don't think we're at that point yet, although Miami is very balanced.

I think, look, Friday nights inside the ACC have proven to be a bit spooky.

I respect the coach.

They have some talent.

They have an NFL wide receiver.

They have a great back in Brown that's from Homestead.

I think they can hang around that number.

Dude, if the Canes lose to any of these teams, it's going to be a massive disappointment.

You're there.

Now

after seeing it, you're like, it's disappointing if they don't have a perfect regular season.

I'm there because of what we have seen from the canes right on and because of scrap you know what what who these other teams are that's great you're for mario cristobal you are disappointed if they don't finish a regular season undefeated uh that's that's that's great he did his job i think the the betting odds would be that they finish 11 and 1 nobody you can't expect a perfect season but i i'm sold on um and i'm not going to doubt um until the end of the day oh but hold on i don't i don't want to just skip back i don't want to just skip past what just happened there though hold on a second when we talk about james franklin gets fired at 34 and and 8 and we saw Mike McDaniel go from 9-2 I'm a genius to no, you'll go up in flames in two years around here.

Mike Ryan is looking at sports radio legend Zaszlo and saying, really, that's, oh, really?

That's the standard again here.

So you're telling me right now, a month into the college football season, Mario Christophe, not merely that the U is back, that.

Guy who will fire coach every 10 minutes says, no, Mario Cristobal has the expectation that if they don't go undefeated, he has not done his job.

It's not the standard to go undefeated, but we're in the midway point of the season.

I know what I'm watching.

All right.

Tougher part of the schedule is seemingly behind you.

Yep.

And at this point,

I think it's okay to set the expectation that if they lose to any of these teams on the remainder of their schedule, that would be a massive disappointment.

And if I say that, then I'm also, of course, saying that they should finish the regular season undefeated when Mike Ryan believes, and you could be right, that Louisville is lol, Dan, that Louisville is the toughest team remaining on the schedule, and the Canes are a two-touchdown favorite, then I'm okay with saying the Kanes should finish this regular season undefeated.

The Kanes should win a game in which are a two-touchdown favorite.

We agree there.

I would say, though, just having seen what you're saying about the really fun half, first half of the season, where there are plenty of teams that look good to me, but not as many that look as good as Miami.

I don't think there are a lot of teams in America that are going to be a 14-point favorite on Louisville.

Like, just if I take any team in America,

Ohio State, maybe, but I don't think anyone else is going to get two touchdowns.

So the money's telling, you know,

they're two touchdowns better.

They're two touchdowns better than Louisville.

But I

take exception to this.

Louisville.

One syllable.

Louisville.

Maybe two.

Is that how Schnellenberger said it?

Yeah, Louisville.

That's right.

It's a battle for the boots, Dan.

Did you know that?

We battle for boots.

I didn't know that.

We won the boots the last time.

They play for a trophy, these two schools.

It should be a pipe.

Come on, societal shit, folks.

Billy, I'm sorry that we didn't do any FIU.

The FIU winning at Western Conference.

Oh, last night we were all Panthers.

I'll tell you what.

I have more people reach out to me and say, pause up than ever before.

What a game.

I love Tuesday night football.

I'm going to say that right now.

If you think people are watching the World Series,

FIU breaks it too.

They're not watching the World Series.

10-game road losing streak.

FIU breaks it.

I love your head coach.

That is a great hobby.

Willie Simmons?

Oh, shotgun.

It's his nickname.

Oh, more water.

Good point, Gilly.

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