Local Hour: The Ship Be Sinkin'

All right, Smirnoff.

Official vodka of the NFL, the world's number one vodka.

Here's the deal: game day is everything.

The noise, the rituals, the passion, the dip, the wings, the dip again.

Smirnoff belongs in that mix because if you're tailgating or hosting or just sitting there checking your fantasy lineup every 30 seconds, you need Smirnoff.

Otherwise, it's not a real game day.

They've been doing this since 1864, which is.

I don't even want to do the math.

A long time.

They're award-winning.

They make cocktails super easy and they're all about bringing fans together.

So yeah, we do game days.

That's their thing.

And if you're over 21, you should too.

Grab a bottle of Smirnoff at your local retailer and head to Smirnoff.com to find recipes of delicious cocktails perfect for game day.

Please drink responsibly.

Smirnoff, number 21 vodka.

Distilled from grain, 40% alcohol by volume.

The Smirnoff Company, New York, New York.

Please do not share with anyone under legal drinking age.

Hear that?

The next chapter of Audi Performance is here.

The all-new Audi Q5, the all-new A5, and Q7.

Each one a statement.

Performance never goes out of style.

Chris, there are too many people here today and too many ailments here today.

We've got a limping Greg Cody who's fiddling with the microphone already.

A limp Ian.

A limping Greg Cody who's...

Billy, you can't applaud that.

It's a good joke.

Thank you for that.

Because he's limping.

Olympian.

Thank you, Billy.

That's my man right there.

You get it?

Yeah.

I don't think he got that.

You don't get it.

He needs an explainer.

Yeah, I mean, this guy.

I want to ask why you're limping, but I got Zaz has just bombed in from Europe because he hasn't talked to sports in 10 days.

He's dying to talk Panthers.

He's dying to talk dolphins.

He fired Mike McDaniel three times

from where?

From Europe?

From which part of Europe?

I mean, I'm walking the streets of Paris.

And you know about that Mike McDaniel?

Like, oh my god, fire him, right?

Didn't get much response.

That's been your take for four days from across the seas.

Gotta fire him.

And look, even Tony's disgusted by how common you're.

They don't care over there.

You're wasting great takes on people that don't give a shit about you.

I don't understand.

They only do soccer there.

Boring.

What do they do?

What?

That's it?

They just...

Nobody works there either.

Nobody works there.

They always walk around the streets.

Go work.

Go do something.

They do hoops.

But what?

Yeah.

Not the NBA.

They have like arguably the best player in the league.

I mean,

so you think they're staying up until like 1 a.m.

to watch NBA games?

It was very difficult for me adjusting to the time.

You know what?

You know what time zones, right, Dan?

You know how that works?

It was really difficult adjusting.

Every game I wanted to watch starts at 1 a.m.

I'm tired by the end of the day, Dan.

Let's walk in.

Why are we sending all these football games over there if they don't care about them?

Great question, Billy.

Why are we playing our football games over there?

What?

I'll never know.

He's an expert now in Europe because he's been there one time.

We've got

Chris Cody.

I don't know.

Are you a caddy today?

What are you?

What up, Lebits?

What up, dope?

What?

What is that?

I'm a frat guy.

What?

I'm giving everybody nicknames.

What up?

RB.

Wait, is this a punishment?

Coates, Jay-Z over here.

What's good, guys?

What's going on?

Wait, are you dressed as a punishment?

I know we're Shadow Show, so we're painting a picture here, but...

I'm a frat boy.

Everyone thinks I'm going to play golf, but I'm a frat boy.

Wait, this is a punishment?

The nicknames.

You look like you always dress.

Yeah, well.

You look like you on the golf course.

This is what I imagine that you look like if you're...

This is you dressed up for Doral.

Classic Lebits.

So your punishment is just to use frat boy lingo?

Ruweez, Ruizy.

Okay.

It's not like punishments to bother people.

I'm curious what fraternity you're in.

GC, I haven't decided yet.

Still applying.

Roy, Roy has the worst punishment I've heard.

Yes, I am doing Greg Watch.

I'm supposed to make sure that he is working at an optimal level.

As you just heard, he was coughing, so I will be getting up and getting him water in a second.

If he's too far away from the mic, I will adjust it for him.

This is what UD is doing.

What are these punishments?

That's a terrible punishment.

I'm not going to be saddled with.

No, Roy chose this.

He's got to dote on Greg Cody all show.

I don't like that.

It's like a personal assistant I've been dreaming about.

You said you wanted a staff.

Now, Roy's punishment is he's agreed to be your staff.

I got a one-man staff.

No, he wanted a walking stick.

Hey, fellas,

if we don't like the optics of this, me and Roy can switch.

What?

I mean, I could just tell by there's some optics that

there is.

It was brought up during the meeting.

What's the problem?

This is the Dan Levatar Show with the Stukats Podcast,

Billy, I hate to ask you this way in front of everybody, but I need your help today.

There's too much going on, and I cannot also have it be Wild Billy Wednesday.

I need your genuine help.

I'm here, man.

No, we've got Greg limping.

We've got Olympian.

We've got Roy signing up for a punishment he should not have signed up for that now has to dote on Greg Cody.

We've got Chris Cody with the easiest punishment there's been ah DLB

Because he's a frat guy We've got Zaz in from Europe dying to talk about the Panthers and the Panthers

the Panthers got me watching shorthanded goals in Philadelphia to see if they're gonna go 82-0

with their two guys down because hockey has infected this market.

I don't like the way any of this looks.

Yes.

Yes, what?

Yes, Panther hockey is back.

Tonight's the opener.

I get to sit and watch the game tonight.

I haven't seen a single game.

This is the opening game of the season tonight.

For me.

You haven't watched in Europe?

Why didn't you follow it?

Are you taking the regular season for granted?

I followed.

Believe me, Dan.

It was the first thing I did when I woke up every morning in that godforsaken country over there in Europe.

What can I see over there that I can't see in Cooper City?

Now, I checked my phone immediately upon waking up, but I missed the Panthers.

I'm very excited to be able to sit and watch them.

uninterrupted.

And you know what?

We'll probably make the Zazla Mansion family room tonight, Dan, a serious room.

You know how I do do in the playoffs.

Playoffs are a serious room.

First game of the season, tonight, serious room.

I don't understand.

The first game started like at five.

You could have watched that one.

Well, so it was 10 p.m.

for me.

Oh, I'm sorry.

Well, yeah, I was really tired.

I was really tired.

You know, are you a Panthers fan or not a Panthers?

You know, Flying Works?

Yeah.

You know, Flying Works.

You were flying.

You were in a plane.

You were sitting.

You didn't have to do anything.

Yeah, and sometimes there's this thing called jet lag, where then I have to wait the entire day to go to sleep.

I have to fight.

I have to power through that.

You wouldn't know, okay?

Because first you get the money, then you get the power.

And that's where I am right now.

I got the money.

Now I'm getting the power.

And with the money, you travel.

And that's why I was in Europe.

You'll learn one day.

Maybe.

I don't know.

I can't predict the future.

What do you do with the power?

You get the respect.

You buy it.

However, you got to do it.

That is the order that it has.

However, you got to do it.

That's brought to you by Scarface and Zaz, who's not even suffering a punishment.

This is just his style now from Europe.

Oh, yeah.

I'm wearing a beret from Paris.

Yeah, I'm not going to do this.

You're wearing a beret?

A beret.

And so, Billy, I've got Chris has the stinky punishment.

Roy has an offensive punishment.

Tony's got a lot of opinions on a lot of different things.

It's our punishment.

And Jeremy badly wants to get on the show.

He's not even working today, but baseball is crazy.

He wants to talk baseball.

And we secured, or everyone secured, some rights through John Tesh yesterday to music we want to have and now we can finally have music on the program on the program that that is good like Jeremy wants to make music for our show inside of the show based on music that we have can you guys explain to me what he's trying to do from the other room in the bullpen because he's not even supposed to be working today I mean he just showed up here to your point and said baseball music and baseball and I said get out and then that's and now he's in the other room and I don't know what the hell he's gonna do Mike is ready to talk that the Mariners are America's team because the Dodgers are they've got the best players from Japan and the best payroll and all the best hitters and all the best pitchers and surprised they're built for the postseason and they're running everybody down.

Mike's a Mariners fan today.

Yeah, I've been waiting for this moment all my life here.

You go up 3-0 in the ALCS.

I mean, all the years of torment following this team.

But Dan, you mentioned that the Mariners are America's team.

That's a given.

Going into a World Series potentially against the Dodgers, America gravitates to the underdog in these situations.

It's much bigger than that.

Let's not be so myopic.

They are Asia's team.

Even though the biggest Japanese superstar in the history of the game, arguably, is playing for the Dodgers.

This Mariners franchise is Japan's team because of Ichiro.

This is super close to Japan, geographically speaking.

This is bigger than America.

This is about Asia.

It's the real World Series now, is what you're saying.

That's why they call it the World Series.

Ziggak.

They're only up 2-0 at the moment, but I know that.

Potentially.

Potentially.

Why is George Kirby's over-under on strikeouts just four and a half?

It was seven and a half last time.

It's always tricky.

He got like six strikeouts one time, only throwing 66 pitchers.

Guys, I know an ace when I see one, Jack.

Well, when you say you know an ace when you see one, the part that the Dodgers have that's unfair is that Glasnow goes for them tonight, and they've got another ace.

They've got three aces.

Nobody gets three number ones.

They've got three number ones, maybe four, and oh, maybe Otani doesn't need to pitch.

Otani's pitching game four, they're announced.

I'm just saying that this team is the most most overwhelming expensive roster there's ever been.

They've got all the star players and all the ways to beat you.

I heard something.

Roy, can you help Greg?

You're on Greg Watch and his computer just made a noise.

You're already failing.

Timeout.

I don't think that was Greg.

No, because I'm looking at my volume right now.

It is zero.

Yep.

Not Greg.

He's on Bell.

What about the phone?

I don't know.

You're on Greg Watch.

Hang on.

GC, it was definitely your phone.

It was my phone.

Why does Greg have three cups of coffee around him?

It seems like a lot.

i earned it billy all right got a lot to earn exactly i was talking to greg before the show dan and he gave me a life hack that i feel like he should impart with everyone that was a great life hack

i i hate to give this away for free but i'm going to okay

uh you know what i should no no just see we were here we're here i got a million life hacks i'll give you one right now who uses a cake cup here who makes coffee with a cake cup this guy okay admit it we were talking before because i was using the espresso machine putting in a pod, and Greg, I was telling him, like, you don't strike me as an espresso guy.

Well, I'm just, hold on a second.

We're getting there.

I was just saying, it seems like Greg is a guy that's just like the classic drip coffee, and then he imparted some wisdom on me.

Right.

I'm a man's man.

Men's men drink real coffee.

So the life hack.

I don't know what that means.

The life hack.

And

nor do you want to.

No, he wouldn't.

That's right.

Sissy.

The life hack is that you can use a K-cup more than once.

Okay.

You don't just fill up your cup and then throw away the K-cup.

I'm pretty sure they're one serving cups.

You definitely do that.

That is historically true.

No, no.

That is new levels of cheapness.

That's a white team over there.

There's some barons in this room, it seems, that are wasteful with their coffee.

If you use the second, and if you pour it in a glass cup, you see what I mean.

Naturally, the first use of the K-cup is the stronger one.

But if you don't mind a mild coffee, you get double the pleasure

out of a K-cup.

It's amazing.

That's trash.

That is that's trash, dog.

That is bad.

Everything okay at home, Greg?

You need money right now.

The K-cup industry is a gas.

The Cody's are trashy.

Come on.

We are.

My dad saved soap scraps.

Wild Bill?

Yeah, he did.

Individually, or would he put it together to make a super soap?

Well, you can melt it and shape it, but

you'd go into my dad's bathroom growing up, and there would be like 10 or 12 little scraps, little shards of soap that had been

ground down into pumice.

Lava, we were a big lava fan like that.

Is that so?

Oh, yeah.

Your hands are dirty.

Like they're in mud.

They're dirty.

And you use lava soap?

They always use a construction worker's hands.

Yes.

As well, they should.

I hate that part, Greg, of the hotel industry, where before you would go, you get the individual bars of soap and you get the little shampoos and conditioners.

Honestly, you were a fool if you would leave those behind.

Those are just going to get discarded as it is.

So you take those home for a rainy day and then you have the soaps.

You can make the super soap out of them.

Yes.

No longer.

Now they have fixed the soaps and the conditioners

as though you're in prison.

I don't like that.

Me neither.

I kind of like that.

What?

Yeah.

I never wash it.

Just bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam.

No, but it's hard because they put it where I dispense the soap in my hand.

And then I got a, like, it's a maze where I got to then move my hands around where the water's coming out, you know?

Plus, that first pushdown, it shoots out of there.

I'm not trying to do gymnastics in the shower.

And what if the person that had the room before me washed their butt right before they washed their hair and they have butt hand on the shampoo?

There it is.

Thank you.

You never think about that.

You know about that butt hand?

There it is.

Never thought about butthand, Gilly.

Okay, there it is.

Greg, I didn't want to ask a question.

Lava, the soap.

Is that like, what did that mean?

Because lava in Spanish is clean.

Yeah, well, that makes sense then.

Lava soap had grit in it.

No, but lava's like a command.

Lava's like a command in Spanish, like lava.

Limpiate.

Wow,

I bet you they didn't even know that.

Cuban guy did the soap or not?

Wait a minute.

They were culturally appropriating the soap back in the 70s.

Your dad's soap was lava, which is the Cuban expression for wash yourself.

You're disgusting.

They had no idea.

You can tell by the marketing because there's a volcano on it.

I mean, it's genius.

It should be the official soap of Cubanos everywhere.

Thank you.

Pumas.

That's what gives it the grit.

Pumas.

Or Cuban soap's better soap.

And we were telling American, hey, clean yourselves.

How about they?

Lava, pueco, del carado, si imbeguenza.

Lebits.

Levitz,

according to Google AI, the most popular MLB team in Asia is likely the Los Angeles Dodgers.

You can't trust AI.

No, you really can't.

Although they are allowing porn soon.

Sweet.

Wow.

Yeah, Sam Altman came out.

Sick.

What are we doing with Jeremy, please, Mike?

I need some help because the show.

I can't answer that question.

So Jeremy's in the bullpen, and I don't know the music bit he wants to do, but he wants to pollute the show with his music.

And Tony, can someone explain to me?

He's not supposed to be working today.

We just had such a good night of hardball.

Dan Dodgers are on a roll right now.

By the way, his ass is grass when my Dodgers meet the Mariners in the World Series, by the way.

His ass is grass, buddy.

But I think Jeremy wants to talk hardball.

And I think he's, we should, because there's been great baseball on.

I'm locked in, as you can tell.

But Yamamoto last night was doing it.

He doesn't want to do baseball, though.

Yamamoto, he was.

He's better than Snell.

First complete game in eight years.

But Billy, I don't know what to do with Jeremy's desire to play music specifically, the Monday night football music that Tesh gave us.

Well, okay, I think that this is, well, that's sort of what happened.

I think what's going on here is Jeremy came in excited.

He wasn't supposed to be here.

And then the solution someone came up with was, okay, go sit in the bullpen, and when we need you, we'll call you while we are actually trying to figure out what are we supposed to do with this man today who just wants to come in and sing songs and talk about baseball.

We're like, music, yeah, dude.

None of us were planning for that.

So we're like, yeah, just go to the bullpen, and when we need you, just be ready.

We'll call you.

You'll come in and we'll get you.

But I don't know that there is actually a plan.

I don't think you can hear us, hopefully.

I don't think there's actually a plan.

So he's just here to sing songs.

That's what he wants.

And we're like, we don't know what to do with him.

So just go sit in that room for a little bit and we'll get you when you're a good boy.

I was like, JT, hit me with a seventh inning stretch remix.

wow i like that it has to be on an organ though yeah we talked about that to test yesterday i don't know if you heard that he i broke the news to him that organists were going away i don't know if that's true though we had looked it up the yankees have two no well no no no they have a they have a weekend organist and a weekday one no no no i'm no the weekday one i'm telling you is a recording marlins got rid of their organists years ago tabby b she would come on tabby b and she would play this take me out to the ball game and if we're going to be honest you know all respect to tabby b and her service i'm getting choked up here the service that she performed for the marlins over the years but tabby b a little fast on the seventh inning stretch and then other times a little slow it was very hard to keep up with tabby b's pace it seemed almost like she was playing games with the audience there yeah not good yeah

this show is sponsored by better help october 10th was world mental health day better help used that day to put a spotlight on the real heroes the therapists the ones who show up listen and help you figure your life out because every session isn't just talk it's It's a moment that matters.

Like learning to be patient with your kids, fixing a relationship, or finally shutting off your brain at 2 a.m.

Now I love my friends, don't get me wrong, but they're not therapists.

My group chat, total chaos.

Sometimes you need someone who knows what they're doing.

That's where BetterHelp comes in.

Over the last 12 years, they've helped more than 5 million people connect with over 30,000 licensed therapists around the world.

It's the biggest online therapy platform out there, with a 4.9 rating from over 1.7 million reviews.

Here's the thing, life's hard on and off the field.

Talking to someone trained to help can make all the difference.

World Mental Health Day has passed, but we're still celebrating the therapists who've helped millions of people take a step forward.

If you're ready to find the right therapist for you, BetterHelp can help you start that journey.

All listeners get 10% off their first month at betterhelp.com slash D-L-B.

That's BetterHelp, H-E-L-P.com slash D-L-B.

Every October, my pets get just as excited as the rest of the family.

Which sounds cute until you realize that means I need costumes that actually fit.

Toys that don't fall apart instantly and treats they won't just sniff and walk away from.

Luckily, Chewie has it all.

Fast delivery, great deals, everything in one place.

Dopey's happy, Izzy's happy.

I look like I know what I'm doing.

They've got food, treats, toys, even flea meds, all shipped to my door in a day or two.

And if I have questions like which flea treatment's best, or if my dogs can actually pull off a taco costume, someone at Chewy's there 24-7.

Plus, with 100% satisfaction guarantee, I can return anything within a year.

Finding costumes for bigger dogs is usually impossible, but Chewie has sizes for everyone.

This Halloween, make your pets be part of the celebration.

Shop costumes, toys, and treats with Chewie.

Go to chewpanions.chewy.com/slash Lebatard Show to get $20 off your first order.

That's chewpannions.chewie.com/slash Lebatard Show to get $20 off your first order.

Chewpanions.chewy.com/slash Lebatard Show.

what does zin give you not just smoke-free nicotine satisfaction but real freedom freedom to do what you love and choose your rewards with zin rewards you can redeem points for premium tech outdoor gear and gift cards to your favorite retailers find your zinn and keep finding rewards that fit your lifestyle at zinn.com slash rewards

warning this product contains nicotine nicotine is an addictive chemical Don Lebatard.

John, can you rate my Al Pacino from that billiard scene in Carlito's Way if I do it for you?

I think it's pretty good.

Yeah.

Okay.

Stugats.

You think you're big time?

You're going to die.

Big time.

That is

on my infamous scale of one to ten.

That's a 7.6.

Solid.

Good job, Dad.

That's a Sue nominee right there.

Good.

This is the Don Lebatar show with the Stugats.

The organists have been going away.

They have to take their organs with them to the game every day, which is probably part of it.

You know Wildfield?

That can't be solid.

You know Dick Jans?

Have you ever seen an organ before?

No, the organ needs to be.

There's no way that.

You guys know about Dick Jans?

No.

Dick Janz used to be the other Marlin organist before Tabby B took over.

You know that fool.

Yeah, Crazy Fingers Fingers or whatever his name was.

Dick Janz.

He retired.

Dick Janz.

Is that so?

Yeah, no thing.

BG, on Tabby B's Twitter, she still has Marlin's Park organist.

Yeah, when's the last time she tweeted?

Yeah.

You know what?

We're gonna.

Hopefully, she's still with us.

It was a long time ago.

Thoughts and prayers to the B family.

Something happened tragically, aside from just no more organing, you know.

Is that what you do, organ?

Such a shitty joke, Uncle Dick.

Uncle Dick Jans.

I need an ottoman.

Really?

Yeah, top.

RB?

Sounds like you're up, Roy, to raise my hand.

No, this can't be how we do this.

Oh, no, I need an Ottoman to raise my daddy.

This can't be Roy jumps up.

That's what he's here for.

No, it's a problem.

It can't be Roy jumps up every time.

Wait a minute.

The punishment is that Roy has to do whatever Greg says.

I need an Ottoman.

He just helps them.

That's the thing.

Yeah.

Classic bells.

We can switch if you'd like.

He chose it.

He did choose this.

He had dozens to choose.

But you get the frat boy and he gets this?

Chose it.

We have a list of punishments.

But your frat boy stinks.

It's just relaxed DLB.

I think what Dick Jans, if I remember correctly, I think he retired because he lived in Orlando or something, would drive down for the game and drive back.

Like, I'm pretty sure he was not a local, and he had a long commute.

So let's now talk about this so that we can.

Billy has secret insider information on the dying organist trade at Marlins Park.

As baseball is celebrated throughout the globe and the Marlins get left out because they've got, what's the history of their their organists they had Dick Jans I'm trying to find him he had a good nickname but I don't remember what it was he had Dick Jans and then Tabby B was there for a little bit but then Tabby B but Abby B was no longer there now and may or may not still be with us based on her Twitter use history

there's not it's not that interesting I'll admit that the Panthers have more tradition already than

than the

local baseball team that has won two titles.

Also two titles.

Dan, I'm so excited for tonight.

I can't wait.

I'm going to be on my couch at least a good 30 minutes prior to puck drop.

Just getting the mind right.

You're not a fan.

You haven't watched the game this season.

When the season opener is here, you got to make sure you have your mind right.

And that's why I'm going to be in the proper seat on the couch.

I'm going to declare the Zaslow Mansion Family Room a serious room.

I am so, I'll probably have a beer in hand.

I am so excited for this game tonight.

Panther Hockey's back, baby.

Jay-Z, what's the difference between when it's a serious room and when it's a normal room?

The stakes.

You know, obviously when there's a playoff game, it's always a serious room.

If we're playing those pieces of garbage called the Tampa Bay Lightning, that's a serious room.

Don't even get me started on the Lightning.

Oh my God, what?

That's a dirtbag franchise.

Wait a minute.

Have you had these takes in Europe since that last fight of the season?

Have you not had a place to give your opinions on?

Wait, you were in Europe?

when the Panthers started the season in the preseason by getting into a huge fight.

Yeah, that game was a Saturday night, and obviously, like, I left for Europe on the Monday, but I wasn't here, you know, it was the weekend.

So the start of your two-time defending champions, defending their title with a fight against the lightning, and then they went three straight at home, and now you come home to, I missed all this?

Yep, missed it.

Missed it.

I mean, I checked my phone the first thing the next morning.

I was very excited.

I would announce to my boys while they were still in bed, Panthers won last night, guys.

That's how I woke them.

You wouldn't want to be woken up with your father telling you the Panthers won last night.

What a gift I give them.

What time was it?

What a gift.

What time?

For me, locally?

When you woke them up and gave them the gift?

Oh, like 8 a.m.

Yeah, maybe 7.

That's early enough.

It's waking up.

What time do they wake up?

Oh, we're on vacation.

Yeah, what are they doing?

Drugs?

Why are they sleeping until past 8 o'clock?

What's wrong with them?

We did a lot of walking.

We did a lot of touring these days.

All right.

Size, this guy doesn't get it.

He's never been to Europe.

He doesn't understand.

He doesn't have the power.

I've been to Europe.

Nah.

He doesn't have the power.

I've been to Valencia?

Barely.

Boring city, if we're going to be honest.

I don't know about it.

10 days in Valencia.

Oh, my God.

Billy hates Europe.

Falsehoods.

I mean, I'll be honest.

I don't know what I saw there that I can't see in Cooper Cooper City.

He's not wrong about that.

It's a sweet award winner.

Old stuff here, old stuff there.

No air conditioning.

No one wears deodorant.

Great, wonderful.

I love this.

Why don't you clean your stuff a little bit, you know?

So, Zaz, let me ask you this.

Where in Cooper City is the Arc de Triomphe located?

Okay, you're saying words that I don't understand, so I'm trying not to take it as disrespect.

Arc?

Arc?

Arc de what?

Arc de Triomphe.

You know what?

I think you're making that up if we're being honest.

It's an arc.

Our boutique hotel overlooked the Arc de Triomphe.

We were walking distance for the Champs de Célé.

It's a beautiful Arc.

I don't think you're pronouncing that correctly.

Yeah, whatever it is.

You know, I'm not French.

Yeah.

Although my ancestors were.

Is that so?

Yeah, yeah.

French-Canadian and French.

Isn't that where the Tour de France ends every year?

The Arc de Triomphe, I believe it does.

GC, did your wife tell you how much that hotel costs?

Because she famously tells you it costs a quarter of what it costs.

I assume that I always jack it up and the price, too.

Oh, yeah.

Based on what she tells.

GC.

Based on what she tells me.

She always lowballs it, you know, because I know she thinks I'm cheap.

You know about those things.

So if the hotel room is.

She still talks to you in like 90s prices.

Right.

She thinks you're cheap.

You used cake cups twice.

Of course she does.

That's because that's a scam and everybody knows it.

Thank you, Greg.

I'm hugely.

I've been saying that Greg Cody is one of the cheapest people in the history of the world forever.

Yes, his parents had no reason to save soap scraps.

Well, my dad grew up in the Depression.

That's true.

Which may or may not be true.

I got to do the math on that.

I had to lie to my wife yesterday about the price of something when we were coming back from Europe.

You know, like I,

we were going to take the subway to the airport because it's really expensive, you know, to take the Uber.

And I checked the price of the Uber, you know, and it was like 40 bucks.

Like, oh, that's awesome.

Forget about taking the Metro.

Let's just take, we could take the Uber.

It's totally fine, all right?

And then when the Uber was coming, I saw that it was really $120.

So it's three times the price.

And she was like, hey, so we made a good deal.

Where I'm like, yeah, yeah, we got a good deal.

We got a good deal.

The problem was, I put in the wrong airport the first time.

And then when I put in the wrong, I was too embarrassed, Dan, to tell her that I made the mistake, which has now cost us triple the amount of money.

And it was too late to change that up.

So like, hey, we got the good price.

Yeah, yeah, we got a good price.

We got a good price.

What do you know about Charles de Gaulle, buddy?

I mean, I know the airport's named after him, but I don't know that fool.

He's a beloved figure in France.

I mean, I don't belove him.

Former prime minister.

Big ears.

He had Cody ears.

He had the Cody ears, DeGaulle did.

Big ears.

That's the only thing I remember about him because he died when I was a kid.

I can't believe the K-Cup thing, man.

Honestly, that is wild.

Look, this is a famously cheap family.

Greg, please tell us a story from another time about how the Cody's grew up being cheap.

Well, I don't consider myself cheap, but what Christopher said is true: that if my wife tells me the hotel room costs $400, I assume it costs $600.

You know, that kind of thing.

And my dad, you know, cheap, when you say...

Why can't she tell you the real price?

Like, are you going to get mad?

I would be like, what?

Why are we spending that much on a hotel?

You know?

We stated at the new Pier 66 the other week.

It was more expensive than the

thing right up the road that's the Ritz-Carlton.

Yeah.

You know, so it's a you got to be careful when you rent a room, I tell you.

And you got to remember: Wild Bill grew up in the Depression.

He did.

So, like, if Wild Bill heard these prices, like, that's a year, that's a mortgage for a year.

Right.

Back then, you weren't cheap if you saved soap scraps.

That's what everyone did.

But the K-Cup thing.

The K-Cup thing is brilliant.

Yes.

Also, trashy.

Why?

K-cup, kick-cup.

K-cup, k-cup.

Drinking your coffee.

Drink it with Cody.

So that's what's Jeremy doing.

That's great.

That's good use of his time.

Can I ask you something about the K-cups?

You use it for the first time.

Where do you keep them until you then use it again?

I use it immediately.

Like, once the grounds inside have become cold, they are disqualified.

Then you throw it out.

But if you use it immediately, like

I would pour this cup, right, with the first use of the K-cup.

And then I'd get another cup and I would do the K, lift the handle again, lower the handle in the same K-cup, you get the light on again that asks you what button to press.

You press the large button, and what happens is you get a free cup of coffee.

Now, it's not quite as strong as the original, but it's perfectly drinkable.

So, what do you do?

Put it in a little less sweetener, little less cream, you get the hue correctly, you balance the hue, and there you have screwed

the coffee industry.

Can I be honest with you?

I think I'm gonna try this.

Who wouldn't?

Why wouldn't you?

I think I'm gonna try it.

I'm not able to not try it.

I think I'm gonna try it.

You're gonna try it.

Is it cheap?

Is it efficient?

Is it something that he's just making two different kinds of coffee?

He's getting a two-for-one.

It's not being cheap, it's just being smart.

I think I'm gonna try it.

What is happening, girl?

That's the life hack of the week.

Drinking your coffee.

Drink it with Cody.

Great jingle.

I think Roy, you should bring him some more cups of coffee because I'm just saying he's only got three of them there.

And we want Cody's doing such good work on behalf of coffee and how you should drink more of it that we should get him some more coffee.

Why do you have three cups of coffee already in front of you?

No, these are waters to soothe my throat.

And yet you still sound raspy.

Well, that's, you know, a lot of people think that's sexy.

What's happening with your knee?

People worry about you.

You're over 70.

You missed talking dolphin football.

I know Zez wants to talk dolphin football.

What a team.

Well, I was in here two days ago, so I did talk dolphin football.

No, but the Tua thing happened after that and engulfed the team in flames.

The McDaniel reacting to Tua, and now it's that dumb conversation.

Now it's instead of talking about the Jets, the Dolphins get an extra week of everyone's laughing at them because there's only one now that they fired Callahan where you're like, oh, they don't know what they're doing at all.

It's not even about losing.

It's just like, oh, the Saints will win a game here and there, but that team down there in Miami is about to implode.

Like they're fast receivers out after two games.

And then what are they going to do?

Oh, they don't have enough of anything.

The whole thing's going to collapse.

Who's going to get fired?

And quarterback saying, not me.

Hey, it's Tony from the Dan Levittard show, and I got to tell you something that makes me feel a lot safer with my wife and kid at home.

It's simply safe.

Most security systems only react after a break-in.

And that's too late, if you want to be honest.

Real security stops crime before it even starts.

I just watched a video that was absolutely terrifying.

An arson is trying to light a family home on fire.

And you know what?

SimplySafe stopped it before anybody got hurt.

Their AI-powered camera spotted the threat, alerted the monitoring agent, and the intruder got confronted while still outside the house.

That's what I call real security, pre-security, not post-security.

I trust SimplySafe with my home, my family, and everything I care about.

No hidden fees, no long-term contracts.

And they've been named one of the best home security systems by U.S.

News for five years running.

Right now, Levitard Show listeners can get 50% off a SimplySafe system at simplysafe.com slash DLB.

That's simplysafe.com slash DLB.

Try it risk-free with their 60-day money-back guarantee and see why I trust them so much.

There's no safe like Simply Safe.

Hey, audience, I got a special treat for you because I want to talk to you about Miller Light, but I want to talk to you about Miller Light with my good friend Rose.

Hey, Rose.

Hi, everybody.

When we hang out, and we hang out often, we're friends.

I consider us friends.

Yeah, me too.

We're often toasting the good times.

And what am I toasting with?

With Miller Light.

That's right, Miller Light.

Whether you're hanging out with your dear friend Rose or at game day, it just hits different when you got a Miller Light in your hand.

From jaw-dropping touchdowns to fantasy heartbreaks, it's a beer that has been there for every moment.

50 years of great taste, simple ingredients, and that iconic golden color that you can spot across the room.

And it's just not the color of the beer, which is brilliant.

That beautiful white can.

How beautiful is that?

Is that you doing the sound of a can opening?

Is that your favorite sound?

Um, no, it is a horsey.

A horsey?

All right, we'll stop doing that.

And here's a kicker.

Miller light is just 96 calories, 3.2 carbs per 12 ounces.

The original light beer since 1975.

That's right.

And still hitting different five decades later.

You're so good at this, Rose.

I know.

So whatever your game day looks like, remember, Miller time is always a good time.

Look at us.

We're a great tag team.

I'm five again.

Can you do that?

Uh, that beer sound one more time?

and the horse sound one more time?

I regret asking you about that one, but the Miller Light sound is good.

Miller Light, great taste, 96 calories.

Go to millerlight.com slash shan to find delivery options near you or you can pick up some Miller Light pretty much anywhere they sell beer.

It's Miller.

Time.

Celebrate responsive.

Blee.

Miller Brewing Company, Milwaukee, Wisconsin.

Sin.

96 calories and 3.2 carbs per 12 ounce.

On ses.

No, it says.

Oh, ses.

Howdy, folks.

It's Mike Ryan.

Super excited to talk to you about the official ticketing partner of the Dan Lebatard show.

They've been a good partner of ours, and I couldn't be prouder of it because, folks, you know, I really use GameTime.

I practice what I preach here, people, because the Game Time app gives the advantage back to fans.

It's a hack for unlocking amazing tickets, especially when it comes to the National Football League.

It is hard to get some really prime NFL tickets, and GameTime makes it so incredibly easy because the interface is beautiful and easy to understand.

And the the Game Time Guarantee means that you can trust that you'll be getting 100% authentic tickets on time and at the best price.

Plus, fees are always included.

So what you see is what you pay.

You get zone deals, favorites, panoramic seat views, the low price guarantee, and GameTime's unparalleled ticket coverage.

Take the guesswork out of buying NFL tickets with Game Time.

Download the Game Time app, create an account, and use code DAN for $20 off your first purchase.

Terms apply.

Again, create an account and redeem code DAN for $20 off.

Swipe, tap, ticket, go.

Download the GameTime app today.

Don Lebatard.

All right, we got to go back out there.

That was big.

Wake him up.

Uh-oh.

He doesn't want to be bothered anymore.

Now it's getting tense because he didn't need that as a result.

He needs something that happens.

You can see Mother F.A.

Can we bother?

Are we bothering you right now?

Turn on your microphone, Greg.

My microphone's on.

Stugats.

Paint the scene.

The paint the scene is: I gotta go to work.

Good night.

This is the Don Lebatar Show with these two guys.

Among the most embarrassing things going on with the Dolphins now, it's not just that Tom Brady's out of the league and now the Dolphins missed that opportunity and the Bills are doing what the Patriots did.

But on top of that, the Patriots have now actually lapped the Dolphins where they were able to somehow rebuild and then be better than the dolphins again.

Yeah, that to me is maybe the most embarrassing part.

Drake May has been really, really good.

But if I can say one thing about the Tua controversy, which to me should not be a controversy, I think I'm the only one in the media.

I don't hear anyone doing this.

You are literally alone.

Who else?

Joe Rose isn't doing it.

Everyone is bailed on this ship except for the homerific Cody who's saying that's Tua trying to exhibit leadership.

I've heard no one else say that.

Okay.

Okay.

Okay.

Tua's problem is not what he said.

Tua's problem is the broad public perception that he hasn't earned the right to say it.

Okay.

If Dan Marino says the exact same words, everybody's going, wow, that took balls to say that.

He's right.

Danny's expressing leadership.

He's stepping forward and saying, hey, you guys, get your act together.

This bullshit is where we shouldn't be playing this terrible.

But Marino was amazing from the get-go.

He earned it immediately.

Oh, but this is such a good place that Cody is making this argument from.

Everybody knows the ship be sinking.

Like, it's all done.

It's rarely do you get one of these calamities, sports calamities, that everyone in the country's looking down there and saying, that might be worse than the Jets.

And look, the Patriots are better and the Bills are better.

We love this sport.

Patriots ruled it.

Are the Patriots going to rule it again?

Look what's happening with the Jets and the Dolphins.

They fought over Fitzpatrick.

Bills tried him too.

This has been funny for 20 years.

Now it collapses in Miami in a way that's louder than the Jets who don't know how to coach.

Like the Jets don't know how to coach what's happening there.

They are coaching calamities there.

That's an amateur football team.

It's not because the talent's amateur.

It's like everything happening there is the most amateur thing in the league.

Penalties, stupidities, and

that's the worst team in the league by miles.

Like we've seen no greater incompetence this season than the Jets passing game in the last game.

Took the stink to two countries.

But laughing is in Miami.

Jets are done, everyone's finished.

But the laughing's in Miami because the quarterback and the coach are fighting, and it's loud as hell.

And there's only one columnist in America who's saying, I don't see it on national television either.

No, two is trying to lead here, but the company,

the region, doesn't believe he's actually Marino.

It believes he's a failure too, who's going to get swallowed by the mess.

So he has no backing except Cody.

Okay,

let's make this clear.

He is speaking as a captain of the team and as the starting quarterback.

About player-only meetings.

Yeah.

That's like his response.

That's like the leaders of the team lead those meetings.

Right, who's the leader of a player-only meeting if not Tua?

He is.

Right.

Somebody's questioning the leadership.

He's like, we have people not showing up to these things.

Whose responsibility is it to pressure people and make people feel like they need to show up to these things?

When you call a players-only meeting, you don't call people...

20 minutes before the meeting and say, hey, you're going to be there, right?

You assume they're going to be there.

And when they don't show up, and then you blow blow the game in the manner that they blew it, you're frustrated enough and angry enough to say something.

I don't blame the honesty in that.

I appreciate your perspective here, but what do you make of Mike McDaniel coming out and saying Tua shouldn't have done it that way?

I think he didn't support his quarterback.

I think what he said about Tua was worse than what Tua said about his unnamed team.

The ship be sinking, guys.

Like, this is how it...

Man, they don't want to be laughed at by everybody.

I think...

Isn't Chris supposed to be the frat guy?

Why are you doing that?

That's twice he did that.

Be sinking?

Is that an apostrophe after sinking?

It's just what it's famous for.

I'm sorry.

I wasn't.

Wasn't that in the Toronto Blue Jays Clubhouse one time?

No, this is.

I mean, don't get me wrong.

You sounded super duper cool when you said it.

Pop your collar next time.

I deserve that, but

the story I'm remembering, and it's an ancient one, that

the tabloids, when they were feeding in New York, back when the tabloids in sports meant something, okay?

And basketball meant something that it doesn't even even mean today, I wouldn't say, with today's Knicks, okay?

Everybody was laughing in New York at the basketball team, and I'm forgetting the name of the player.

It's a famous quote.

The ship be sinking comes from a famous New York player.

Michael Ray Richardson.

So forgive me for

forgetting the name, but the moment that he said that, he gave fodder to the media to make the city explode.

And now everyone laughs at this team because in his own voice, that guy just said, we all know that it's all going down.

Everyone's going to get fired.

We're all going to lose our jobs.

That's I've never seen it happen like this in Miami.

Tell me when.

Tell me when you've seen that it's coming out to clean house.

Like just get sweep everyone out of here.

The owner's old.

He's a billionaire.

He's a very successful man in every other way.

This team continues to embarrass him because it's an international failure.

And now everyone wants everyone out of town.

It's never happened in this market before.

I feel like it's happened to the Dolphins like four times this century.

With Floras.

I'm pretty sure without any hyperbole, I say this.

We are witnessing an all-time worst Miami Dolphins season.

Not the worst, but one of the all-time worst Miami Dolphins seasons.

This one sticks out because this pain is so drawn out.

We went into the season kind of feeling like this.

You were at a tipping point already.

Yeah, yeah.

Where all the other ones, like the season kind of fell apart later in the year, and then it was understood that guys would go.

And sometimes you had interim head coaches.

Just Mike McDaniel's there just twisting in the wind.

There doesn't appear to be a pain.

Everybody knows what the end of the rainbow looks like, or I shouldn't say rainbow.

There doesn't appear to be a path for anybody.

Mike McDaniel, Greer, Tua.

There doesn't.

So what are we doing here?

Just...

Just kill it.

Get a better draft pick.

I think the funny thing about this team is that that it could be like vastly different had just one or two plays gone different ways in different games while also not being different at all like had a chan not stepped out of bounds in the patriots game they would have won the patriots

that happens to bad teams no but no but what i'm saying is had had they won that patriots game that's another win instead of a loss had they held on and won that panthers game and not given up a second game winning drive to bryce young they would have won and not lost.

But continually doing stupid things is what bad teams do.

No, but what I'm telling you is,

the same thing could have happened with the Chargers, where they make a tackle, they win that game.

And you could be looking at a team that has a winning record

that is not good.

And then you don't make the changes that are necessary.

So while the team is what the team is, these bad mistakes could end up helping them long term because it can give them such a bad record that they ultimately do what they've needed to do, which is completely clean house.

They need to get rid of Greer.

They need to get rid of McDaniel.

They need to likely figure out a way to move on from Tua.

But if they have a winning record, they're not going to do that.

And they're going to be stuck in the same position.

And it's just dumb plays and mistakes that have put them in the position to finally make the decisions that they've needed to make.

You brought up interesting points, but does this team feel close to you?

Like, that's not going to toggle yourself into it if the team's four and two.

But I think that's exactly what you're doing, talking yourself into it, because they don't appear that close.

They have six one-possession games.

Oh, Billy's right.

I mean, come on.

The whole league is a team.

This team looks like trash.

This is like, from a neutral observer, that's a garbage team.

It always has been this season.

And you guys got blinded by some weird shit.

I'm not exactly sure.

This has always been a bad team.

Yeah, but Drake never made sense with his projections.

Like, it was a bad team.

It was one of the jokes in the league.

But Stephen Ross has never made the decision and is never going to make the decision with this group of people if they continue having a winning record or being a game away from the playoffs.

They're like, we'll add here, we'll add there.

They didn't add anything last.

I mean, they added Waller, which Dan ended up being right about Waller, which is like crazy.

But they wouldn't have made like large-scale changes if they had a seven and whatever, 10 record.

This is what we needed.

You either got to be really good or really bad.

Yeah.

They're having that conversation in Cleveland.

And do you think Cleveland's close to being a good team?

Well, which one of you was saying that Cleveland is a must-win game for the Dolphins?

It is.

Yeah, they got to win that one.

I think that if they lose at Cleveland, I think McDaniel might be fired after that game.

Why wouldn't, to Billy's point, why don't you just lean in at this point to McDaniel, make this a bad season?

Well, no, I'll tell you, it gets better when there's an interim coach.

You coach.

Sometimes you bring in an interim coach, all of a sudden they like, you know.

Sometimes you get a

Ross, I leave it.

And I'm like, you know what?

I'm out.

I'm out on these guys.

Now, the reason you got to make the change if you're Ross, you have to show the fan base, I'm angry also.

I'm willing to make big changes.

Boy, he did that look behind you on the sidelines.

He put his hands on his head, and that was like, whoa,

that was a statement by Steven Ross.

That's as mad as we've seen him.

Who's the Dolphins Jeff Saturday that they could be like, hey, you want to come in and just kind of stand on the sideline for half a season?

Marino's never going to do that.

Marines.

We know Marino's Jason.

Jason Taylor's at the University of Miami.

He's tied up at the Dolphins.

What's Zach Thomas doing?

That's a good question, ZT.

Sam Madison did some coaching.

Sam Madison?

ZT, that's your trick, Chris.

I just said Marine.

That was a bad one.

On Marino, you made him Marine, and that was you and John.

Which is just as long as Marino.

We just changed the last letter.

Dan the the man.

That's a good one, Roy.

It's a cursed franchise.

Here's an example.

When they went 1-15,

that was not a panacea, okay?

They drafted Jake Long, I believe it was,

instead of Matt Ryan, okay?

They had a good year the next year in Sperano's first year, and then they went seven years in a row without a winning record.

So even if you go one in 16 now, it would be, and get that top draft pick, it's no guarantee if you don't don't have good people making the picks.

Look,

everybody's going to be fired here, okay?

McDaniel's going to be fired.

Chris Greer is going to be fired.

It's just the only thing we're arguing about is when.

Should it be right now?

Should it be at the end of the season?

That's the only debate here.

We all agree this has been a nightmare season, and the current regime won't survive it.

Greg, would you agree that McDaniel has had the blueprint in place to show that this offense can score 70 points, can be really good?

If they went out and fired Chris Greer instead of McDaniel, how would that make you feel?

Well, right now, the problem is defense, even though everybody thinks Anthony Weaver is one of the best defensive coordinators in the league.

Why does everyone think that?

Because he's pedigreed from the Baltimore Ravens when the Ravens were really good, so you assume he knows what he's doing.

GC, I think you're making a leap from a respected defensive coordinator to one of the best in the league.

Like, I agree with you.

I don't think anyone looks at him as the problem, but like, you just made a leap to one of the best in the league.

No, in fact, one of the things in play here is that everybody would say, okay, if they fire McDaniel next week or the week after, the assistant coach who's fit to take over is probably Anthony Weaver, who happens to be the leader of one of the worst defenses in the league.

So how would that look?

You know, what kind of an optic is that if you're Stephen Ross?

You also can't keep Mike McDaniel.

Like, it can't be just get rid of Greer.

No, you can't.

McDaniel has lost this team.

Like, he does not have the guys believing in him whatsoever.

It's very obvious, and just changing Greer is not going to fix that.

Well no general manager is going to come in and say yeah Mike McDaniel that's my top choice to be the coach.

No one's going to do that.

No, the GM will want his own head coach.

Now he may be forced to live with Tua for the next couple of seasons but he absolutely would be able to bring in his own head coach.

Hey audience, I got a special treat for you because I want to talk to you about Miller Light, but I want to talk to you about Miller Light with my good friend Rose.

Hey Rose.

Hi everybody.

When we hang out and we hang out often, we're friends.

I consider us friends.

Yeah me too.

We're often toasting the good times.

And what am I toasting with?

With Miller Light.

That's right, Miller Light.

Whether you're hanging out with your dear friend Rose or at game day, it just hits different when you got a Miller Light in your hand.

From jaw-dropping touchdowns to fantasy heartbreaks, it's a beer that has been there for every moment.

50 years of great taste, simple ingredients, and that iconic golden color that you can spot across the room.

And it's just not the color of the beer, which is brilliant.

That beautiful white can.

How beautiful is that?

Is that you doing the sound of a can opening?

Is that your favorite sound?

Um, no, it is a horsey.

A horsey?

All right, we'll stop doing that.

And here's a kicker.

Miller Light is just 96 calories, 3.2 carbs per 12 ounces.

The original light beer since 1975.

That's right.

And still hitting different five decades later.

You're so good at this, Rose.

I know.

So whatever your game day looks like, remember, Miller time is always a good time.

Look at us.

We're a great tag team.

High five again.

Can you do that beer sound one more time?

And the horse sound one more time?

I regret asking you about that one, but the Miller Light sound sound is good.

Miller Light, great taste, 96 calories.

Go to MillerLight.com slash Shannon to find delivery options near you, or you can pick up some Miller Light pretty much anywhere they sell beer.

It's Miller.

Time.

Celebrate Responsive.

Blue.

Miller Brewing Company, Milwaukee, Wisconsin.

Sin.

96 calories and 3.2 carbs per 12 ounce.

I'm sess.

No, it says.

Oh, sess.