South Beach Sessions - Sebastian Maniscalco

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Speaker 6 Hello and welcome to South Beach Sessions. You know I like talking to the stand-up comedians and very few are better than this guy.
He's been doing it a long time and I'm a big fan of his.

Speaker 6 He's got a new special out, It Ain't Right, November 21st on Hulu.

Speaker 6 You're still out here doing it. You're still out here crushing.
It's Sebastian Maniscalco with us. So where are you right now with the grind of the comedy tour?

Speaker 6 Are you still every bit as hungry as you have been? Because you're now also an Academy Award-winning film person.

Speaker 2 Well, I got three shows left from the tour, and then I'm off for a long period of time because

Speaker 2 after these tours end, I just need time to, A, like, recharge, reset, and then live life a little bit so I could extract material from life. So it's been a grind,

Speaker 2 but we're coming to an end here within the next two weeks. I got three more shows all at casinos, and then

Speaker 2 got the holidays off, can spend it with my family. I'm going to be out in Florida for Thanksgiving, and then

Speaker 2 Christmas here in Los Angeles.

Speaker 6 I should tell the people, SebastianLive.com is where you go if you want tickets and tour dates. Is it the same for you as it's always been in terms of the grind of the comedy tour?

Speaker 6 Because when you say you have to recharge and go back to living life so you can have material for the next tour, you've been on this particular treadmill for a long time.

Speaker 2 Yeah, so it has definitely gotten harder as the years progress because the way I look at it is my material has to be greater to or equal to whatever the hell you saw the last time I was in town.

Speaker 2 And if that dips, I feel the audience leaves and goes, it's similar to sports. Don't got it no more.
You know, I'm not going to pay a hard ticket price, see a guy who's not at the top of his game.

Speaker 2 So as life progresses, as my career progresses, it becomes harder and harder for me to come up with material that is because I don't want to go out there and just

Speaker 2 half-ass it, you know, just for the sake of going on a tour. I want to go out there and give people because the way I look at it, it is a business.

Speaker 2 People spend hard-earned money to come out and see you perform.

Speaker 2 They get a babysitter, they park the car, they, you know, make a night of it, and I want them people to leave saying, wow, can't wait till he comes back. I want to take friends and family.

Speaker 6 The pressure of that, though, would would be pretty extraordinary, I would think, to have to feel like you have to continue to top yourself when, generally speaking, I think I can say this, comedy doesn't age well.

Speaker 6 It doesn't seem to have affected you very much, but most people aren't doing this into their 60s, 70s, and 80s well. Not that you're that age yet.

Speaker 2 Yeah, listen, I hope I am able to perform, you know,

Speaker 2 in my 60s, 70s, and 80s. I'd love to do that.

Speaker 2 But, you know, hey, my act is very physical. I'm moving around a lot.
I don't know who's going to come out when I'm 80 years old and I could barely, you know, get to the stage.

Speaker 6 But you're saying you'd still love to do it then, huh? Like, you love it that way so much that it's something that you can envision wanting that deep into your life.

Speaker 2 When I don't do comedy, I'm not in a good mood, put it that way. So this is very therapeutic for me to go up there.
Like, I just had a fight with my wife yesterday, and how I deal with that is I

Speaker 2 make comedy out of it. So, I can't wait to get to a comedy club this week to present that.

Speaker 2 Actually, I'm going to be in Boston this week doing a charity event, but there I will maybe sprinkle some of the argument material in to see if it goes.

Speaker 2 So, the way I look at these things, whatever happens that's traumatic in my life, whether it be whatever, a disagreement with your wife, a death, an illness, I try to make humor out of of it.

Speaker 2 It's how I grew up.

Speaker 2 I come from a family that

Speaker 2 we were laughing at funerals. You know what I'm saying? It was like, it's the only way we could cope with the

Speaker 2 disaster of what had happened was to find a morsel of humor in it. So, yeah, I find that this definitely is my career, but also helps me kind of

Speaker 2 filter a lot of things that happen in my life.

Speaker 6 I imagine that your wife probably catches you in the middle of arguments processing how you're going to make it material.

Speaker 2 No, it's not even happening in the moment because in the moment, it's not funny. It's not, it's like, I'm not like sitting there going, this is going to be great for the stage.

Speaker 2 I'm trying to figure out how am I going to win this thing.

Speaker 6 That is not the way.

Speaker 2 If you're still trying to figure out how to win, you're going to lose for the rest of your life. It's terrible.
It's just like if you don't win arguments, yeah, yeah, I get it.

Speaker 2 But or at least make my point or something.

Speaker 2 I'm not sitting there looking at the funny of it at all. But, you know, you let that marinate for 24 hours.
You get up the next day.

Speaker 2 And then you got like, oh, okay, this was funny. That was funny about it.

Speaker 6 I'd like for these to be biographical. So take me back before working seven years as a waiter at the Four Seasons, which I want to get to.

Speaker 6 Take me back to a traditional Italian household, what you're growing into, and where the funny was coming from.

Speaker 2 So I grew up in the northwest suburbs of Chicago, a place called Arlington heights i had a father who was a beautician a mother who was sorry not a beautician he's a hairstylist he gets upset when i say beautician

Speaker 2 and then a mother who worked at the elementary school as a head secretary and grew up in a fairly normal household i mean as normal as you could get i mean a lot of entertainment types you hear a lot of these stories of single parents or a lot of like maybe drug use or abuse or whatever it seems like the the the the the upbringing is a little volatile I grew up in a loving home.

Speaker 2 There was no darkness. There was, you know, everybody was laughing and goofing around.
I had parents. My parents got divorced when I was in my late 30s.

Speaker 2 So it was a different kind of trauma for me later on in life rather than growing up. But I felt like I had a normal childhood.
I went to school.

Speaker 2 You know, they told me to get good grades and grew up in a middle-class family and nothing that would

Speaker 2 suggest that I was going to get into the entertainment business. Although, I knew at a young age, I love stand-up comedy.
In school, when they asked, What do you want to be in second grade?

Speaker 2 I said a comedian.

Speaker 6 You told your grandparents that in second grade, right? It wasn't flippant, right?

Speaker 2 No, no, I was serious because I used to watch Johnny Carson with my parents, and I was fascinated with the comedians when they come on. I'm like, God, how do they, remember? I usually get excited.

Speaker 2 I don't know why, I just got excited when they came on and used to love to laugh. I was going to comedy clubs when I was 16 years old, not to perform, just to watch.

Speaker 2 like a lot of kids were going to the high school basketball games i was going to the local comedy club with the girlfriend i had at the time and we sat in the back and and and laughed so it was always kind of in the fabric of growing up but you know growing up in a in a house i did i didn't know how to get into this business i didn't have nobody in in the entertainment world i went to college i wanted to quit my first year of college and i told my father you know this is not for me I want to go to Los Angeles and be a comedian.

Speaker 2 And he right away said, just settle down, get your degree, and then you could do whatever you want after you graduate so I did

Speaker 2 and I came out here when I was 24 years old it's funny that we're even here next door used to be a place called Dublin's it was a Irish bar and on Tuesday night they used to have comedy upstairs and it was the hottest comedy scene in LA at the time this is a ninth

Speaker 2 about 2000 right next door was like, you know, the Dane Cooks were born.

Speaker 2 I remember going, that's where I met Vince Vaughan next door, who I later bec was in a movie with him called the Vince Vaughan Wireless Comedy Show. So,

Speaker 2 yeah, it's ironic that

Speaker 2 we're here today just because I spent a lot of time.

Speaker 2 Across the street was a place called Miyagi's, which is a sushi bar that used to have comedy, I think, on Wednesday nights, used to perform on the bridge.

Speaker 2 There's like a little bridge, and used to perform on the bridge to people who were eating sushi.

Speaker 6 It's not that far from the comedy store.

Speaker 2 I'm going to say right down the street. You're talking about the factory's right here.

Speaker 6 Yeah, but

Speaker 6 you're talking about something a little smaller, a little grittier.

Speaker 2 Yeah, this is like,

Speaker 2 this was my gym, these places right here. Going night in, night out, working out the material, you know, dealing with hecklers.

Speaker 2 You would go to the comedy store down the street and you'd be scheduled at 9.45 and then Eddie Griffin would walk in and perform for an hour and a half. So the whole lineup would get bumped.

Speaker 2 But I stayed. You know, a lot of people get say, I'm not going to stay.
I'm like, I got to stay because the way I looked at it was, I don't know who's going to be in the audience. And number two,

Speaker 2 I got to work out my material. I remember one night, it was dead at the comedy store.

Speaker 2 A comedian who has passed away since, his name is Freddie Soto, went up on stage and there was like, I don't know, 13 people.

Speaker 2 And Mark Anthony walked in with his group, saw Freddie Soto, and from that night, brought Freddie Soto on the road to open up for him.

Speaker 2 So it's like, you take a night off in this business, you never know what the hell you're missing. So that's the mentality I had,

Speaker 2 you know, kind of navigating the comedy scene in Los Angeles in the late 90s, early 2000s.

Speaker 2 And then, you know, 2005, it kind of started, started making a living, you know, $1,000 a week or what have you.

Speaker 6 Tell me about the bowling alleys.

Speaker 2 So the bowling alleys, this was in Manteca, California.

Speaker 2 Again, a lot of people that have a comedy, oh, we're going to do a comedy night.

Speaker 2 They just think they could throw it up wherever the hell, you know, the comedy is going to work everywhere, which not necessarily is the case.

Speaker 2 You know, you need lighting, you need stage, you need like...

Speaker 6 Not bowling pins crashing.

Speaker 2 Yeah, well, this was a double. This is a double whammy.
This was, I performed in a boxing ring

Speaker 2 with a bowling alley behind me. So it was like the fact that we were in a boxing ring with fresh blood from the night before on it.
And then behind me, someone's picking up a spare.

Speaker 2 But, you know, that's how you, just like anything else, you know, you got to work your way up to the better rooms.

Speaker 6 But probably not going to open for Mark Anthony from there.

Speaker 2 No, no, no, no, no. Those opportunities were, I remember it was a hundred bucks they were giving us.
And they give you an hour worth of time to do because locally you only get 15 minutes.

Speaker 2 It's hard to work an act out for 15 minutes. You know, you need a good hour to kind of play around with it.

Speaker 6 Especially if that bullhog Eddie Griffin is going to show up.

Speaker 2 Yeah, especially in L.A. where, you know, you know, a lot of celebrities popping in and out.

Speaker 2 You know, that would be, you know, Chappelle or Chris Rock or whoever that would like, you know, they don't put their name on the list. They just pop in and do their time and then leave.

Speaker 2 So, yeah, you'd have to go to Manteca in a boxing ring to get an hour's worth of time. So, yeah, that was, but it's all good.
You know, it all builds character. It all builds.
You say that now.

Speaker 2 But when you're in it. Well, when I'm in it, I was having a ball.
I'm like, I'm doing what I came out here to do. I'm doing comedy, right?

Speaker 2 Yeah, I was working at the Four Seasons, which is also down the street as a waiter, but anytime away from being a waiter, I was like, you know, happy. We weren't getting paid but $15 a set here.

Speaker 2 It's not about like we were paying the bills what we were making, although $15 did put gas in the car back in the late 90s.

Speaker 2 But, you know, it's not like we were getting rich doing these spots around town.

Speaker 6 What does the family think as you're hustling your way trying to make it? And, you know, I don't.

Speaker 6 Maybe you're enjoying it and maybe it feels like success because anything that's not waiting tables is success.

Speaker 2 but does the family think you're on your path toward your dreams yeah family was extremely supportive leaving chicago i come from a family where you would think they would be a little reluctant about having their son get into the entertainment business based on how i was

Speaker 2 where i was brought up and the you know kind of close-knit Italian family.

Speaker 2 I mean, you don't, you know, very rarely, I think now more than ever, it's very, very common for someone to say, I'm getting into the entertainment business, right?

Speaker 2 Because now everybody with a camera is all of a sudden scorses

Speaker 2 or doing something, right? Or somebody with a microphone thinks they are a broadcaster or what have you without maybe putting the time in. I mean, you know, this, you're like a student at a game.

Speaker 2 It's like you kind of worked your way up. You didn't just turn on a microphone and all of a sudden you had access to the world.

Speaker 2 You know, you might have had to work your way into the ESPNs of the world, right? It's like you didn't get that handed to you. So,

Speaker 2 you know, it's something to be said about

Speaker 2 it's it's a it was a long shot back then but god my family was so supportive and saying listen if you think you could do this go out there and give it your all we're we're we're we're behind you there was one hiccup i had where i think it was five years in i called home and i got a little emotional telling my father and my mother at the time she was like what's wrong i said i just you know i

Speaker 2 when do i start making money at this thing

Speaker 2 when's it going to happen for me and that's okay you need to be patient. You know, it's hard to not look around and see everybody succeeding, and then you're not.
You're on your own kind of timetable.

Speaker 2 And it's difficult to kind of just laser focus on what you're doing and

Speaker 2 put your head down. And, you know, hopefully your turn will come.
But, you know, a little discouraged at that time. Wasn't thinking of quitting at all, but just discouraged.

Speaker 2 And my family kind of helped me through that.

Speaker 6 What was happening then? What take us back there? Because obviously you've arrived at something that probably exceeds your dreams.

Speaker 2 Back then I was

Speaker 2 not happy working at the Four Seasons Hotel because I was waiting tables and

Speaker 2 the grind of going in to work dealing with very demanding clientele was definitely wearing thin on

Speaker 2 my patience.

Speaker 6 You don't seem like the type that would be great at customer service if rich people were being assholes. Like that seems like something.

Speaker 6 You eating it just, I mean, I'm doing observation from over here, but you having to eat that probably wasn't good for your mental health.

Speaker 2 Yeah, no, it was a lot of angst there.

Speaker 2 I wanted to provide five-star, five-diamond service. However, my

Speaker 2 and actually I look back at the way I weighed tables now and I'm actually disappointed in my behavior because not that I was a bad waiter. I was just not

Speaker 2 very friendly.

Speaker 2 I had like a, I don't want to say a chip on my shoulder. I just had like a,

Speaker 2 coming from the northwest suburbs of Chicago,

Speaker 2 I never was a problem when I went out. I was always a please, thank you guy.

Speaker 2 You know, if my fries came out cold, I never sent it back. You know, I was like, always like, just, you know, roll with the punches type of guy.

Speaker 2 And then here I'm put into an environment where a customer is telling me that the wine glass is not, the brim is not thin enough to rest on her lips. And I was going to, you know, I was like,

Speaker 2 it was hard to pill to swallow that, that type of attitude. But, uh, but looking back, I wish I was a little bit more present

Speaker 2 with the amount of

Speaker 2 opportunity around me to learn about wine and liquor and food. I remember

Speaker 2 one of these top chefs from Napa coming in and giving like a seminar of how to, like, how you would make this, that, and the other thing.

Speaker 2 And at the time, I wasn't interested in cooking now I love cooking but I'm like I'm not gonna listen to this guy I want to do stand-up so I wish I was a little bit more open to learning back then because I did have a lot of opportunity to do so What else do you remember about seven years of waiting tables?

Speaker 6 Because that's waiting for it a pretty good amount of time. I don't know how many of your peers had that kind of grind, but there would be good reasons to doubt within that.

Speaker 2 Yeah, the way I looked at it, I was never a couch surfer. I was like,

Speaker 2 you know, a lot of people come out here with $12 in their pocket and they live on somebody's couch for three months and then pop over to it.

Speaker 2 I didn't want to do that. I want my own place.
I wanted to have a little scratch to walk around and buy stuff. So

Speaker 2 I wasn't going to,

Speaker 2 well, I did actually leave the job for a little bit to go sell satellite dishes for Dish Network in the ghetto.

Speaker 2 So that was a.

Speaker 2 I was slinging satellite dishes for Dish Network on Martin Luther King Boulevard

Speaker 2 in,

Speaker 2 God, where is it? Baldwin Hills, at the Baldwin Hills Mall in a kiosk.

Speaker 2 So selling satellite dish subscriptions out of a kiosk

Speaker 2 because I was so sick or tired of working as a waiter. And then I went into severe debt doing that because I wasn't selling anything.

Speaker 6 You were bad at it or just there were circumstances that made everybody would be bad at it.

Speaker 2 I don't think anybody could have been good at

Speaker 2 that job.

Speaker 2 During that time, you needed a credit card to qualify for the service. And a lot of people that were shopping at that mall did not have a credit card to qualify.

Speaker 2 So I couldn't even get people in the door. But I would go to home shows, you know, try and sling my wares at home shows.

Speaker 6 Sales and service, these don't seem to be as personable as you are, they still don't seem to be the kind of businesses for you because you do wear this chip on your shoulder in a way that i wouldn't say necessarily unfriendly but not necessarily welcoming the way that customer service and sales require yeah well i i see i it's tough to hear that uh

Speaker 2 i'm informing you of this you weren't aware of it well i gave you the sales part part of it but the hospitality part of it again i i think in the environment that i was in at the time i I wasn't flourishing in the hospitality business just because I had other interests.

Speaker 2 But now, I mean, I would love to open up a small boutique hotel because I love hotels and I love like,

Speaker 2 you know, I'm the type of guy I go to a hotel and I see something that they do. I'm going to incorporate that in my own life or I'm going to do that when somebody else comes over to my house.

Speaker 2 I think that's a nice touch.

Speaker 6 Oh, I think you'd be great at it now, but there are an assortment of things that you have to learn that I imagine you weren't prepared to learn in your 20s, hungry and trying to make it.

Speaker 2 Yeah, I mean,

Speaker 2 although I started working in the hospitality business at 16 at the Olive Garden, I was working as a waiter there. I was working at Marriott Hotels and the banquet rooms.

Speaker 2 I mean, so hospitality and customer service has always been in my

Speaker 2 you know, in my blood, but it's just at this level in Beverly Hills, it was a little bit of a shock coming from Chicago.

Speaker 6 So what happens? You run back to the thin-lipped woman who wants her glass a certain way at the Four Seasons because you went into debt.

Speaker 2 Yeah, I go back to the Four Seasons because I needed money, and my father bailed me out.

Speaker 2 I was $10,000 in debt, and my father gave me $10,000, but I had to pay every cent back, and he was so meticulous about keeping track of what I owed him on a pizza napkin.

Speaker 2 I remember calling him, going, how much do I owe you? You owe me $8,700 to the cent you got this?

Speaker 2 And you know what? At the time, I was like, I'm going to pay you back because I don't like the feeling of owing anybody anything. So I wanted to make it whole.

Speaker 2 And a lot of parents probably would have just said, here's the 10 grand. But my father made me pay it back.
And I applaud him for that just because

Speaker 2 it just, it wasn't a here.

Speaker 2 I'll bail you out.

Speaker 2 It had meaning that I gave him the money back because I was dead set on working a lot of hours to pay him the money back and then, you know, starting at zero and then keeping the job at the four seasons while I pursued the comedy.

Speaker 2 But yeah,

Speaker 2 he bailed me out, but I had to pay him back.

Speaker 6 I erred in saying that you wouldn't be good at customer service because I have read you say about your parents that they did teach you manners and respect. What else did they teach you?

Speaker 2 Well, I think what I came out of that,

Speaker 2 first and foremost, is like a work ethic that, you know, they instilled in me that no one ever is going to give you anything.

Speaker 2 and whatever you got to do you're going to have to work your ass off for so that being said

Speaker 2 and i think they did it too much because

Speaker 2 i don't know sometimes i'm getting better at it when to kind of turn it down or turn it off you know you go on this tour for whatever two years

Speaker 2 and my mentality is what's next what are we doing you know what am i going to do next you know which

Speaker 2 You don't really have to do anything next. You could just wait until the next tour and then tour again.

Speaker 2 But the way this is set up, the entertainment business, what a lot of people I think gets sucked into is

Speaker 2 having to do

Speaker 2 even me, I'm sitting there going, I'm looking at my other comedians. You know, one's got a clothing line, another one's got a tequila, and like, and then you start thinking, should I have a

Speaker 2 vodka brand? You know, like, is this what I need to be doing? You know, should I have a line of sneaker?

Speaker 2 It's like, it's okay just to be good at what you're good at.

Speaker 2 You know, sometimes I think you get caught up in having to do a lot more than what you even want to do because you feel a pressure that you have to be relevant or seen.

Speaker 2 You know, it's like with the social media. And again, I didn't grow up with the social media or I didn't start my career with social media.

Speaker 2 But now it's like if you don't post on social media, it's like you don't even exist. You know, it's like,

Speaker 2 I don't know, it just seems, it seems a little, I don't know, it's a little strange to me the way this is all kind of set up. I grew up with like Prince and Michael Jackson, where

Speaker 2 if you saw them, it was like a treat.

Speaker 2 You know, it's like, oh, I remember when Michael Jackson showed up on Arsenio Hall, I was like, Jesus, he comes out, you know, it was like, but there was something alluring about that.

Speaker 6 But now it's like too much access now, you're saying.

Speaker 2 I mean, is it? I mean, people they want to see everything. They want to see you go to the bathroom.
You know, it's like you got to have a camera on constantly, apparently. But I don't know.

Speaker 2 I've wrestled with like what, you know,

Speaker 2 what to show,

Speaker 2 how much do you show.

Speaker 6 That one's interesting on you, though, because I would imagine somewhere at your core, you exactly remember what it was like to be struggling, to want it so badly.

Speaker 6 And so now that you've arrived at it, you don't want to be satiated, especially if I'm assuming you're a bit of a workaholic, right?

Speaker 2 Yeah.

Speaker 2 It's like you work to get to a certain place, and then now you have to kind of manage

Speaker 2 what you want to share.

Speaker 2 You know, if you told me it when i first came out here that i got to post on social media five times a day i'm like give me the camera let me let me go at it but now it's like you know you you want a little bit of privacy you don't want to show you know like what you're doing with your family but it's like i don't want to like pawn my kids for the sake of

Speaker 2 of like a promotion you know i mean i don't want to have my daughter on there saying go see my daddy

Speaker 2 it's a little it's a little gross you know sometimes But I also don't want to be that guy that's on social media and you just see the back of the kid's head.

Speaker 2 That's another.

Speaker 2 It's like we don't, the kid's in the shot, but we don't want to see the kid's face, you know, or they blur it out or whatever.

Speaker 6 But you also don't want to age out. You see that the game is changing, but you know what you're good at, and that continues to pay.

Speaker 6 Like that continues to be something that sells out Madison Square Garden.

Speaker 2 Yeah, but even though you want to, you know, I feel like, yeah, I've hit somewhat of a success where I'm able to sell out these arenas, which is great, but I feel like there's a lot more audience that doesn't really know what I do, and I want to get a lot of different people to the show.

Speaker 2 Yeah, I mean, I got the Italians, they come out, you smell the cologne in the arena, and that's great, but I don't see why there's not more Asians at the show or black people or Indian people.

Speaker 2 You know, the comedy is such where it's broad enough where everybody could enjoy it. I'm not talking specifically about an Italian upbringing.
However, I have done that.

Speaker 2 But, you know, I just did the thing with Justin Bieber on Twitch. Apparently, this is the new kind of

Speaker 2 way people want to consume entertainment. They're looking for authenticity and how you are.

Speaker 2 And I'm like, well,

Speaker 2 he's got an audience that I haven't tapped into. He's 31 years old.

Speaker 2 Why can't I make his audience laugh? So I went on his Twitch on a Halloween,

Speaker 2 which was an odd experience for me because, you know,

Speaker 2 it's live. You know, it's like whatever's happening is happening.
You could walk out of there and not have a career based on what the hell you say. You know what I'm saying?

Speaker 2 So it was a little frightening, but you know what?

Speaker 2 I wanted to face my fear of going into an environment where I knew nobody. I never even met the guy before.
And then the next thing you know, I'm in

Speaker 2 his ecosystem, hanging out with his friends, his agents, his managers. And I'm like, you know what, let me throw myself in the fire and see what happens.
So I like to do different things. And if

Speaker 2 these opportunities arise where it's something kind of new and exciting, I don't mind being a part of it. But there's a lot of deliberation that goes into it.

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Speaker 6 How much deliberation went into you are someone who got married late, you're someone who had family late.

Speaker 6 How much deliberation was involved with I'm going to take care of me the first 40 years of my life, and then I will be a person that can share with others.

Speaker 2 Yeah, I think that was the mindset. I didn't want to like have a distraction of a wife or kids

Speaker 2 Well, I mean, it would have been back then. I don't even know if I would have made it because I know how I am with family now.

Speaker 2 And I even know back then when I didn't have a family, if I had a family, I would feel extremely guilty leaving my young kids and my wife while I went on a six-week run, right?

Speaker 2 I would be pulled.

Speaker 2 I am pulled now, but at least I have the means where I can kind of set up the schedule the way I want. Back then, I, you know, I told my agent, I work 52 weeks a year.
I don't take time off.

Speaker 2 Can't do that when you have a family. You know what I'm saying? So I think it all happened for the right reasons.
I did have kids late in life.

Speaker 2 Sometimes I look at my friends in Chicago who their kids are going off to college now. I got an eight and six year old.
So

Speaker 2 I wish sometimes, oh, I wish kind of like I kind of grew up with my buddies and the kids and they all were like kind of together.

Speaker 2 Not that they would have been friends because we live in two different states, but you know, there's the relatability of kind of what I'm going through right now and what they're going through.

Speaker 2 It's two different things. They're sending her to college and I'm going to the little league game.
So it's two different things. So

Speaker 2 I think I'm a better father being one that started later on in life because now I'm able to kind of prioritize my family. I did a movie in Alabama.

Speaker 2 This was three years ago and I had to be gone for nine weeks. It killed me.
I was like, I was miserable.

Speaker 2 I think it showed in the film that I was not happy as I should have been filming that film, but I definitely had my heartstrings being pulled going,

Speaker 2 what am I doing in Alabama when my

Speaker 2 little daughter is performing in her first play? You know, it just killed me. So I made an effort to kind of figure out, okay, this is when daddy works and this is when daddy stays home.

Speaker 6 Well, I've also read you talking about balance. You have more of it now, right? I have it properly assessed when I say you're a workaholic, right?

Speaker 2 Yeah, I love work.

Speaker 6 And have you been able to figure that out over the last 10 years? Because you've gotten all the opportunities over the last 10 years. You've said yes to a lot of Alabamas.

Speaker 2 Yeah. Now I know.
I think in the last three years I've kind of figured out what to do and how to do it. Because listen, I'm not saying I'm a guy that wants to stay home 365 days out of the year.

Speaker 2 i'll go nuts uh i just figured out a way now to spend quality time with my family as well as doing what i love as a comedian and and doing things in the entertainment and business that i enjoy uh do i wish i would have figured that out sooner yes but again

Speaker 2 I don't really look in the rearview mirror. I look too far ahead.

Speaker 2 If I have a problem with anything, I'm looking like way ahead. Like being 52, right? I'll do the math and go, okay, probably about 80, start falling falling apart.
You know, it's 28 years.

Speaker 2 Am I going to see my daughter get married? You know, like that, that's how far in advance I'm looking. I mean, I really envy people who live in the moment and they don't care.

Speaker 2 It seems like, you know, they get up every day. It's a new day.

Speaker 2 I get up every day going,

Speaker 2 what am I going to be doing in five years? I'm still working. You know, like they're just pining constantly.
And I think it's a cultural thing, too.

Speaker 2 Not only that, also looking at financial and economics, being Italian, Italians are always focused on money and do they have enough? Should I buy this? Should I buy that? What should I save?

Speaker 2 Am I going to die tomorrow? You know, like

Speaker 2 it's hell to live in this head.

Speaker 6 And your dad was meticulously keeping the notes on how much you owed him.

Speaker 2 To this day, I call him up and he's at his desk with the papers. Like, what are you doing? I'm doing figuring out if I make this money because he's still working.
At 80, this man is still working. And

Speaker 2 he's working because if he stops he's gonna die you know I'm saying this is that this is the mentality but he's still up he's just trying to figure out I got insurance and they're raising my tax you know there's a lot of like math

Speaker 2 at 80 that maybe

Speaker 2 and I look at that I go is this way I'm this work I'm at it at 80 years old I'm gonna be in a room is it

Speaker 6 probably yeah I gotta be honest with you you can ward it off if you see it like now is a good time

Speaker 6 you can't You can stop right now and figure it out, but you go more and more into business.

Speaker 6 You have a lot of business interests. You're fascinated by business.
And I don't know how much you earn in comedy, but I imagine you earn just as much with your business interests.

Speaker 2 You know,

Speaker 2 comedy, listen, I'll be honest with you. Comedy is

Speaker 2 the number one income stream that I have.

Speaker 2 You know, I do these other things, whether it be a podcast or a role in a TV and film, which, I mean, this doesn't pay. I mean, the TV and film,

Speaker 2 when you look at the numbers, it really

Speaker 2 you're only doing it for, you know, the passion of doing it. I mean, it pays, but it's nothing compared to what I'm doing

Speaker 2 on the tours. But,

Speaker 2 yeah, I mean, listen,

Speaker 2 you sit there and go, okay, you know, how much do you need?

Speaker 2 When could you, you know, kind of like

Speaker 2 tailor it back a little bit.

Speaker 6 Is there an answer to that question?

Speaker 2 I'm sitting there just asking it when I'm actually hoping we figure it out on this show.

Speaker 6 I'm not sure that this is a hole that you're ever going to fill.

Speaker 6 It sounds like if you're talking about, you actually said while we were talking about this, you know, it's going to be hard to do physical comedy in my 80s.

Speaker 2 Yeah, I skipped 60s and 70s.

Speaker 2 I had a hard time doing stand-up comedy two and a half, three years ago when I shot my special in Las Vegas. I had sciatic pain ripping down my right leg.

Speaker 2 And every time I moved, I was in some sort of pain. So it was really hard to be funny and be in pain at the same time.
So, I kind of felt what that felt like, and uh,

Speaker 2 yeah, I mean, listen,

Speaker 2 is the physicality going to slow down eventually as I get older? Yeah, but I still like to think that I could still do stand-up comedy and make people laugh without you know, jumping around on stage.

Speaker 2 Who knows?

Speaker 6 How long did it take you to pay your dad back?

Speaker 2 God, I think it was a nine-month, nine-month thing because I would float him money every month. I think

Speaker 2 about a thousand bucks a month, maybe a little bit over that. But I was also living, you know, paying the bills and what have you.

Speaker 2 So, yeah, it took about nine months working, you know, pretty much day. This is how sick I am.
I used to,

Speaker 2 I was a part-time employee, but the reason I was part-time because I didn't want to. have the obligation of working 40 hours a week because it would take away from stand-up.

Speaker 2 So I would work part-time, but then if I had the time, I would go in in to the hotel and I would stand, starting at 2.30, I would stand by where they punch in and out. So

Speaker 2 people came in every hour. So 2.30, that person came in.
I go, you want to go home? And they're like, no, I need the money. I'm going to stay.
Okay, so stay till 3.30.

Speaker 2 That person come in, punch in, you want to go home? Yeah, I would love to go home. Boom.
And I would punch in. So I was stealing people's shifts, but I would stand for sometimes four hours.

Speaker 2 I would stand by the thing where people would clock in to work.

Speaker 2 And I think, again, that type of mentality kind of bled into stand-up comedy where I was like, all right, just book me for

Speaker 2 whatever show that there's available. I'll do it.

Speaker 6 Would your dad be the kind of dad who would tell you he was proud of you for paying him the money back?

Speaker 2 Back then, I don't think that was in him. However, now I just got a letter from him.
It was really sweet. I just opened it up right before I came here.

Speaker 2 I bought him a car recently and uh he was he was like blown away he's it was a surprise i just had to show up in his driveway he was looking for a car but um

Speaker 2 the way my dad looks for a car it takes four years for him to purchase it because the the amount of research he's got to do with the car and where it was built and why are they charging me this and that by the time he got a car he's going to be dead so i just said i sent the car and he wrote me a really nice uh letter and uh it said you know he was proud of me and it's it's not something that was said I think early on in life I think as as my dad got older those start those starts of I'm sorry those emotions started to kind of come out more and more as as my career kind of

Speaker 6 escalated when you wondered aloud if you're going to become your father or not and basically said that you would

Speaker 6 the the ascent to that position begins with you referring to it as the social media when you put the the in front of it But he wrote you a letter that he sent in the mail

Speaker 2 on yellow legal it's a legal pad he

Speaker 2 he put it in a card and uh and and he fought it was it wasn't even folded you know like normally he's like folded but then to fit in the card he folded you know this did that little bit to fit in the card and then I and yeah it was written scratch outs here and there stuff on the side you know yeah a letter there was no no like text, mess, email.

Speaker 6 But that passes for effusive emotion from him and something that he wouldn't have been capable of 30 years ago, right?

Speaker 2 Yeah, yeah. I mean, there were hints of it.
I don't want to say that my dad was like, you know, had a

Speaker 2 black heart.

Speaker 6 I'm sorry if I seem to have given the impression that he has a black heart. I didn't intend to do that.

Speaker 6 I just assume Italian men, Hispanic men, I assume that from that age, they're going to be a bit primitive

Speaker 2 with their feelings. Yes, they are.

Speaker 2 However, my dad, I think, had a kind of coming of age where he did start, you know, my mother is more of that person for me. You know, like, although she's still, you know, I come from like

Speaker 2 negative

Speaker 2 people, you know, like, I think that's like our family is kind of negative. If something happens, we always dwell on like the negative of it all.

Speaker 2 Even that's, I think that's how I like motivate myself to do better is I don't, I'm not one of these guys that gets up and like,

Speaker 2 you know, you see it all over social media that people that are like, positive, you got to write down your goals, bro.

Speaker 6 You know, get up and get in the ice bath.

Speaker 2 I'm like, rise and grind. My fear is it's all going to go to way today.

Speaker 2 So you got to make more.

Speaker 2 My tongue's going to fall out, you know, something.

Speaker 6 You're still there. You're still there.
How do you bury that person?

Speaker 6 How do you stop that person? Or do you think it's too responsible for your success?

Speaker 2 Yeah, why do we got to stop the person? To me, it's like, if I stop that person, I'm going to go broke.

Speaker 6 You don't think you can be successful and not broke without being that person?

Speaker 6 That person is responsible for all the fuel, for all the content.

Speaker 2 Yeah, and it's also responsible for making sure I'm financially stable. Because if you don't have that, what's the alternative? You're buying all this stuff.
You know, I laugh sometimes, you know,

Speaker 2 especially in Los Angeles. Everybody's like bragging about the second home.
You know, I'm going to go to the vacation home. Okay, that sounds nice in theory, but I look at it like a vacation home.

Speaker 2 That's

Speaker 2 maintenance, that's taxes, that's, you know, that's

Speaker 2 insurance. You are your father?

Speaker 2 Do you think about this at all? Where are you coming from?

Speaker 6 I don't.

Speaker 2 You come from Cuban villages.

Speaker 6 Yes, i come from the same things right work work work is the way to freedom and i also come from watching my father lord over my mother as she wrote in the checkbook that's some of the childhood memories that immigrants have of course i come from that but

Speaker 6 I know that I have enough to be comfortable and I'm not afraid that tomorrow my tongue is going to fall out. And I don't think it is something that undermines my ambition.

Speaker 6 Now, maybe, maybe it does, but

Speaker 6 if you're feeling like you're doing your best work or if you're governed by I have to make my next special better than all the specials that came from it, that's not coming from a need to provide.

Speaker 2 No, that's just coming from a need to provide to the people that are watching me. Like, you never sit there and go, you never ask yourself, is anybody going to watch this tomorrow?

Speaker 6 Is that those thoughts ever come? Yeah, I have some doubts there,

Speaker 6 and as we age and as the game changes on us and young people do things differently, and in some ways I imagine you don't recognize comedy, or you don't recognize some things that are happening with podcasts that are totally different from how it is that you had to climb up the chain.

Speaker 6 So I can understand where some doubt and some threats arrive there. But when you sell out Madison Square Garden four straight nights, like that's not really a concern.
That's not a real fear.

Speaker 2 You know, my fear is, though, like n selling out two nights and you can't do the four nights. It's almost like sometimes I'd rather just have it the way it is because,

Speaker 2 you know, the next time you go back into that market, the expectation would be, okay, you sold out four, and now if you sell out two, what do you,

Speaker 2 you're on the way down. You know what I'm saying?

Speaker 2 It's sick. It's a disease.
I am telling you. Me and my father talk about this all the time.
It's a disease.

Speaker 6 It gets in the way of joy. It gets in the way of joy.
Of enjoying the present.

Speaker 6 If you're off five years years from now, what happens when my body falls apart?

Speaker 6 Those things are not conducive to just general daily happiness.

Speaker 6 My guess is if I'd gone to the Four Seasons Hotel and told that person that was waiting tables for seven years that any one of the opportunities that has appeared over the last 10 years would be in his life, he would say, that is good enough for my dream.

Speaker 2 I have arrived.

Speaker 6 That would be enough to be a measurement of success for me.

Speaker 2 Yeah, and

Speaker 2 I still think the opportunities that have come my way, I'm like, if this all ended tomorrow, I'd be happy that those opportunities happened and I felt like I had succeeded in my profession.

Speaker 2 Absolutely. It's just,

Speaker 2 you know, it's just, you know, I think, and I told my wife this, I was happier doing comedy clubs and going in and winning over a room. of people that didn't know who I was

Speaker 2 because it was like there was something thrilling about that coming in and the expectations were nothing and you'd go up there and there'd be 35 people and then I would stand outside, shake everybody's hand.

Speaker 2 People go, oh my God, we never heard of you. So funny.
Oh, thank you very much. Took a picture with them.
Those to me were like the fun years.

Speaker 2 Not that not having fun, but I just think back then,

Speaker 2 as I look back, those were like,

Speaker 2 I really enjoyed that because

Speaker 2 I could feel the ascension.

Speaker 2 I felt like the next time I came to the club, there was more people there. You started to feel like you were breaking through.
And there was a joy in that that generally I don't feel

Speaker 2 so much now,

Speaker 2 even though the rooms are larger. And, you know, Madison Square Garden,

Speaker 2 it's great and all. But there's something that switched where in my head I was like, okay, what's next? What are we doing now?

Speaker 2 Massive Square Garden, how many? Five? Okay. Next time we'll do 12.
You know, it's like

Speaker 2 you can't just sit there and mess and go, okay, this is where the Pope came, you know, and now I'm here.

Speaker 6 So it's interesting to hear you long for something grittier and more intimate.

Speaker 6 I mean, obviously, arenas and stadiums, like that's not even, was that even, when you were coming up, is that even a possibility? Not for you, for anybody. There's no such thing.

Speaker 6 That started with Kevin Hart, the idea that you could fill out a stadium, right, or an arena.

Speaker 2 Growing up, it started,

Speaker 2 Dice Clay was the guy who was selling out Madison Square Garden in the 80s. And then

Speaker 2 after him, I think Eddie Murphy was doing it too. I think Steve Martin was doing it, but I don't think it was as publicized as it is now.

Speaker 2 Then after that was, you know, I think Dane Cook in my generation was the guy who was selling out arenas. And now it's like...
the theaters have become the comedy clubs.

Speaker 2 You know, it's like with social media and how many people know about comedy,

Speaker 2 you got like, I don't know, 12 to maybe 15 people selling out arenas now. It's like, it's like, it's not like that uncommon, you know? So,

Speaker 2 which, which again, it's like you look at it and go, was that feat

Speaker 2 was, I mean, what's next? We gotta fill out Soldier Field? You know, like,

Speaker 2 what's the next iteration of like what you're measured as success is gonna be?

Speaker 6 But that's a never-ending hole, though, if you do it that way, right? If you do it that way, no success is enough success.

Speaker 6 I would also imagine with you that one of the things that you weren't expecting is that once you're opposite Robert De Niro in the movies and it's, you know, fun and dreamlike, nobody told you that it's also 14 hours a day where 13 hours you're not doing anything or you're sitting in a trailer and it's not nearly what you imagined it was.

Speaker 2 No, that was that was not, again.

Speaker 2 That was the movie that I was nine weeks in Alabama. Here I am

Speaker 2 acting on the other side of Robert De Niro, a guy who, you know, growing up, he was on my wall and this and that. Now he's playing my dad, my dad's on set teaching De Niro how to be him.

Speaker 2 And, you know, there's all this stuff that's happening. And

Speaker 2 I'm bored out of my mind. I mean, when you look at it

Speaker 2 opposed to stand-up comedy, it's just like there's no comparison. I mean, it's you go stand-up comedy, immediate reaction.
You're there for an hour and a half. You do your thing.
Boom, you're at home.

Speaker 2 Here, it's like you get into makeup.

Speaker 2 it's a cloud, okay.

Speaker 2 There's a cloud, yeah, okay,

Speaker 2 so it's it's you know, there's the momentum is gone, you know, there's like with comedy, there seems to be like a momentum that needs to happen, and there's a lot of start and stopping when you're doing a film of that size.

Speaker 2 So, yeah, it was, you know, it's not something I'm like, oh, I'm dying to get back into just because of the time commitment and just it's not that exciting.

Speaker 6 I'm guessing that even though you've made good choices and they're, you know, ambitious and they're fun, I'm guessing that you probably said yes to too many things over the last few years because you're built like you are and the opportunities that were presenting themselves are unlike any opportunities that you ever imagined.

Speaker 2 Yeah, I don't I don't look back and go, I shouldn't have done that or shouldn't have done that. I that's that's not.

Speaker 2 I mean, the the things that I have done, I was very selective about doing because I did turn a lot of things down. It's not like these opportunities come, I go, yeah, I'll take it.
They're very

Speaker 2 kind of mapped out of kind of what plays into my kind of brand of comedy. And then on the flip side, what projects I want to be a part of.

Speaker 2 I mean, I did this movie called The Green Book, who ultimately won the Oscar. And I just, when I read that, I felt like, oh, wow, this is very, very good script.

Speaker 2 I felt like I was laughing, I was crying. I had a very small part in it.
It wasn't a big time commitment. I got to work with Peter Fairley.
and

Speaker 2 it was one of those, like, this is a no-brainer. I mean, De Niro, I wrote the movie, I co-wrote it with Austin Earl.
De Niro signs on to do it. And, like, yeah, I mean, like, you can't.

Speaker 6 Be clear on this. I'm not saying you've chosen a lot of opportunities you shouldn't have chosen.
I'm just assuming your time is getting stretched super thin.

Speaker 6 If you're doing what you're doing with your dad and Robert De Niro and for nine weeks, you're longing about getting, wanting to get back home.

Speaker 2 Yeah, yeah. No, I mean, I definitely took on a lot of work in a probably probably a good three, four year span of time that

Speaker 2 I was burned. I was burned out.
But again, it's like

Speaker 2 you get it while you can, you know, get it while you get it while you can.

Speaker 6 But I think that's how you're driven, though. Like, when am I not going to be hot? When is my tongue going to fall out?

Speaker 6 I have to take these things because when would I ever have imagined any of these opportunities, any of these opportunities presenting?

Speaker 2 Yeah, you're right. You're right.
But now, now I think, I don't know, you could be talking to me in a year and you're going,

Speaker 2 what are are you doing now?

Speaker 2 I think I'm satisfied with where I am professionally.

Speaker 6 It sounds like you're not sure, though, if you're saying to your wife, I was a little bit happier when, or how could I have been happier when it was just the grit of.

Speaker 2 Professionally happier, I think, back then. Not necessarily

Speaker 2 personally. Personally, right now, I feel extremely fortunate and happy with my family.

Speaker 2 Not so much, though, with enjoying the fruits.

Speaker 2 Well, I mean, even that. I mean,

Speaker 2 I even have time, trouble, like,

Speaker 2 like,

Speaker 2 should we remodel the kitchen? You know, do I really want to go through that pain? Because I'm not a type of guy who just goes, all right, here, go do it.

Speaker 2 I'm going to be renting a house for two years. I'm the type of guy that

Speaker 2 you hit, are Are they hammering? You know, like, like, I'm, this is the way I was, you know, I see the gardener outside and

Speaker 2 he's watering, and another guy is looking at him, water. I go, what the, is he watching him walk? You know, like, that's the way it can't turn it off.
Uh-huh.

Speaker 2 I'm telling you.

Speaker 2 It works for you, though, right?

Speaker 2 You're not even sure. I don't know.
I'm sitting here complaining.

Speaker 2 You're not.

Speaker 6 No, no, but you made a distinction that is interesting in that you said professionally versus personally.

Speaker 6 I have trouble separating those things because so much of my identity is tied up in the professional. But once you get married and have kids and now welcome pets into your life, like

Speaker 2 the pets are a problem.

Speaker 6 Not a pet guy. You welcome dogs into your house and you're not a pet guy.

Speaker 2 I didn't really welcome the dogs.

Speaker 2 But it was, it's one of those decisions where I wish I would have been more vocal.

Speaker 6 When the kids are begging for the dog, you just didn't say anything?

Speaker 2 Well, I mean, the second dog,

Speaker 2 I told you before we got on here that I'm not a pet guy. I didn't grow up with pets, and now I have two dogs at the age of 52, and I just didn't know what to expect.

Speaker 2 A lot of people had said, oh, they're just like babies. If I knew there were this much work, I would have had a third kid.
Swear to God.

Speaker 2 I thought they were animals. They kind of roam alone.

Speaker 2 I told my wife, I go, why don't we just let them out? You know, and then, but you let them out and they come back to the door looking for you to come out with them.

Speaker 2 It's like, didn't you come from wolves? Like, don't you just roam around? I don't know, man. It's, it's,

Speaker 6 how long have you been in the pet experience here as not a pet guy? And how did you get worn down? Was it the kids that wore you down?

Speaker 2 It was both. It was my kids and my wife.
My wife kind of spearheaded the second dog because she thought the first dog was lonely.

Speaker 2 And I'm like, what are we here for? That's why we're here.

Speaker 2 But I don't know. So

Speaker 2 it's a male dog that we got first, and then we got our female sister.

Speaker 2 And

Speaker 2 it's not good.

Speaker 6 Are you often not vocal on things? Like, I wouldn't think that would be much of a problem.

Speaker 2 It's an old joke that when you marry a Jewish woman, that's the last decision I've ever made, is to marry a Jewish woman. After that,

Speaker 2 I don't make no decisions.

Speaker 2 I just sit there and go, hey, I don't think that's a good idea. Next thing you know, there's two dogs at the house.

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Speaker 6 How and where and when did you make the decision, if indeed you did,

Speaker 6 from the

Speaker 6 angry comedian you were at the beginning versus making your way somehow into likable and relatable in a way that is really uncommon and I imagine sculpted by you?

Speaker 2 Well, I think when you start out as a comedian,

Speaker 2 very rarely do you go up there and give them the true authentic you because there is almost like, at least for me, I put like a protective layer over me going, I'm not going to give you it yet because I don't know how to, so I'm going to mask it with this character, this anger.

Speaker 2 And after watching it back, I'm going, it's not likable. I mean, I'm looking at me.
He's going, I wouldn't watch this guy. But that just comes with repetition.

Speaker 2 That just comes with going on stage and trying to find out who you are on stage. And you've got to peel back the onion so much where at the core of it, what you're seeing on stage is just a

Speaker 2 kind of

Speaker 2 exaggerated version of yourself. And that's not easy to get to.

Speaker 2 At least for me, it wasn't. It took.

Speaker 2 10 years to figure it out.

Speaker 6 And it was watching yourself and saying, I wouldn't watch this guy.

Speaker 2 I don't like this character.

Speaker 2 One of the things, and it's not like I saw it and then the next day I went out and was some completely different comedian, but starting to chip away at being a little bit more comfortable on stage, laughing at myself, being self-deprecating, which I found people really gravitate towards.

Speaker 2 You could be up there and have a general discuss about human behavior and what you're seeing.

Speaker 2 But then also, on the flip side, to kind of poke fun at yourself, there's a whole run that I do in this new special. It's about 11 minutes of me talking about my health issues from

Speaker 2 my bicep rupturing to

Speaker 2 watching my son go to the bathroom and comparing him,

Speaker 2 him going to the bathroom, and then comparing myself going to the bathroom.

Speaker 6 That of a racehorse.

Speaker 6 His stream is that of a racehorse, and you feel inadequate nearby.

Speaker 2 Yeah, mine is just, you know, mist.

Speaker 2 That's such a great comedic word.

Speaker 6 You're just a mist.

Speaker 2 So,

Speaker 2 yeah, I mean, and then you do that and you kind of let the audience in on the joke that, you know,

Speaker 2 you don't take yourself too seriously. So I found, actually, I have the most fun making fun of myself.

Speaker 2 And what a lot of people don't know is a lot of the times I did a, I used to do a joke about

Speaker 2 people going to Starbucks and eating the muffin out of the bag. It bothered me the way they went in and they just ate it.

Speaker 2 But I do that, you know, so I was actually making fun of myself for doing that, but I wasn't letting the crowd know I was doing that. So there's a lot of things that I make fun of in my act.

Speaker 2 I do, but unbeknownst to the audience, they just think that I'm observing people.

Speaker 6 Everybody in the family thinks you're funny, right? They recognize you're funny, or do

Speaker 6 the kids not old enough yet to find dad as funny as he is?

Speaker 2 they think i'm funny they don't necessarily think i'm as funny as people think i am so they laugh they get it that that

Speaker 2 daddy is kind of a goofball but uh

Speaker 2 not

Speaker 2 you know they're not sitting around daddy make me laugh you know they're not they're not doing that it's just they know i'm a fun dad and uh and and they've been to a show my son has fallen asleep at the show it's not like they're sitting there going my god we got to see daddy tonight how uh How high on the list of traits that your wife loves about you is funny?

Speaker 6 Is it at the top? Like, is it funny?

Speaker 2 Yeah, I think it's definitely

Speaker 2 because I mean, that's how we kind of get through everything. Like, I told you in the beginning, we had an argument yesterday, and today we're laughing about it.

Speaker 2 You know, it takes some time for me to poke fun at either her or me when we're having a disagreement.

Speaker 2 And I think laughter really breaks up. Like, it happened today in the car on the way back

Speaker 2 from

Speaker 2 school. We saw a guy walking across the street, and he looked like he was right out of, like, the evolution chart, right?

Speaker 2 And I just made a comment because he was just like hunched over and whatnot. And boom, she's,

Speaker 2 it almost broke 24 hours of tension. And then, boom, we were back to normal.
We didn't, we didn't. And I go, oh, I love when you laugh like that.

Speaker 2 And she's like, I love when you make me, and then boom, we were like, it was like repaired with humor. And that's how I grew up.
I mean, any hint of emotional crying, it got uncomfortable.

Speaker 2 And like, oh, I got to make somebody laugh because I don't want to see my dad cry or my mom cry. I got to make him laugh.
And that's how we snapped out of a lot of like

Speaker 2 grief.

Speaker 6 An excellent way to avoid any real introspection of the trouble spots. Just make humor the grief thing.

Speaker 2 You can just press that shit down.

Speaker 2 It never comes out

Speaker 2 which i don't i don't know if that's healthy but uh that's the way we know it

Speaker 2 it's probably not the healthiest but i don't i don't know you don't strike me as the type that would be necessarily interested in therapy if you're not doing much looking back and you're always up uh up ahead i do i do therapy but it's it's about current things you know it's not about like oh i grew up with trauma well it's not about that it's about okay how do we how do i guide and i think a lot of the connotation to therapy is, oh, you're like unpacking a lot of baggage.

Speaker 2 For me, therapy is like

Speaker 2 just talking to somebody outside of what's happening in my life and even like bouncing ideas off them. Like I was thinking of moving to Austin, Texas, right?

Speaker 2 And me and my wife were talking about it, but in talking to a therapist about it, there was a perspective that she gave or helped us figure out that you couldn't just get from talking to your dad or your best friend or what have you.

Speaker 2 So that's kind of what I use therapy for. So I'm not, I'm not, that's not foreign to me.
Even here, I give you an example.

Speaker 2 Now that I was thinking, before you started with the therapy, I was thinking about you earlier on, before we got on the air, you were talking about your dog and how it passed away eight years.

Speaker 2 And I honed in, I'm like, okay,

Speaker 2 is he going to get emotional? Is he going to start crying about his dog? I was actually thinking that. And I was also thinking about how do I not have that happen here? And how to like, not that.

Speaker 6 Oh, wow. So you're just just trying to, you're, you're so patterned from your childhood.
How do I avoid making anyone feel something that makes them cry?

Speaker 2 Yeah. Yeah.
I thought, I thought you were going to get emotional, and I don't know if I was like ready for that.

Speaker 2 So I was trying to figure out how do we either navigate off this topic or how can I make him laugh during his

Speaker 2 time of like reflecting on the dog.

Speaker 6 But that's what, so that's what laughter's always been for you then. It's always been this tool that allows you to make your way through life in a way that makes everyone feel not the bad things.

Speaker 2 Yeah, let's let's feel the good stuff. Because even now, people come up to me and go, man,

Speaker 2 it's good to just laugh for an hour and a half. I've been dealing with the death of my mother and this and that.
So it's like I hear that people come backstage sometimes. I do a meet and greet.

Speaker 2 She's like, I'm dying of cancer. And I'm like, oh, holy shit, like, how do I not make this woman think about dying right now? Like, how do we get out of that?

Speaker 2 So that's always been my like mechanism to overcome anybody's kind of

Speaker 2 feeling bad. Although I'm an emotional guy, it's not like, I mean, I'll cry.
I love a good cry,

Speaker 2 you know, but I'm not like,

Speaker 2 I try not to do it around people that haven't seen me.

Speaker 6 Are you an ugly crier?

Speaker 2 I gotta know. I gotta say, my crying is beautiful.
really is

Speaker 2 cinematic you're crying you're cinematic cry oh god yeah no my cry is just like a tear

Speaker 2 the voice chokes off it's not it's not ugly at all it's actually quite sexy

Speaker 6 you're a sexy cryer are you are you deeply masculine like there is one little bit of ointment leaking out of it he is so brave and so strong that that one tear falling down his face means that it escaped the prison of strength that he is

Speaker 2 i think that's a beautiful analogy the prison of strength

Speaker 2 because the cry as it's coming out almost watch the blood bath mouth

Speaker 2 it's like it's totally lost i don't know what the hell it's doing outside the ibs

Speaker 6 I thought you were going to cry when you talked about a letter from your dad. That's beautiful.

Speaker 6 That's a beautiful thing that you would give him the gift and it would land the way that you wanted it to. Yeah, no, it was a little hint of like, and then I'm like, what the fuck?

Speaker 2 I'm on Sunset Boulevard. Get it together.

Speaker 2 No, I mean, it was, it was, yeah, yeah, no, you're right. I, not that, yeah, it was, it was there, but I didn't let it go.

Speaker 6 You don't strike me as the type that would give your, that, that, like you said, you're only going to do it in the kind of company that can be somebody that would know you well enough to embrace that that vulnerability is not to be shared.

Speaker 2 Well, the vulnerability definitely came out during the press run of the About My Father movie, and it came out on the Gail King show.

Speaker 2 It was my dad, De Niro, and me getting interviewed and I cried in that interview. Granted, my father was there and he's seen me cry before, not necessarily De Niro.

Speaker 2 Only De Niro saw me cry in the movie, which I had problems doing.

Speaker 2 But yeah, I lost my emotions on that interview because I just it just all kind of hit me at once. My dad, De Niro, the movie.

Speaker 6 It's crazy, all of it. The name of the special, It Ain't Right.
Hulu, November 21st. How is it different? How is it special to you?

Speaker 2 So, yeah, I like to make my specials special. This one was filmed in my hometown of Chicago at the United Center.
First special I've ever done in an arena. So I was very, very,

Speaker 2 I was contemplating whether or not to do it in an arena.

Speaker 2 First, it was scheduled in a theater in Red Bank, New Jersey, because I've just felt like when doing a special, it's nice to have an intimate environment. It really plays well on camera.

Speaker 2 And I was a little concerned about how large the room was and if people were going to think that this special was something that they could relate to just because of

Speaker 2 how grand it was. However, the way we shot it and

Speaker 2 the way I, the production value of it was just phenomenal. The lighting, the stage design, everything was just beautiful.
And I'm really proud of this one. Not so much the last one.

Speaker 2 The last one I did in Las Vegas and I did it it in a tuxedo. Like I said, I was in pain and I've had no mobility.
This one, I feel like I got my mojo back as far as my physical humor.

Speaker 2 The stuff that I'm talking about is very, very current, very relatable,

Speaker 2 you know. family-oriented, although there's some topics that I touch on

Speaker 2 about Amazon. That's a little,

Speaker 2 I don't know.

Speaker 2 I did I I think it's generally speaking I don't do like current events not that Amazon's a current event but it is uh it's current in the sense that you know who knows in 10 15 years where amazon's gonna be but um

Speaker 2 yeah just touching different topics and and whatnot and a lot of self-deprecation like i said there's an 11 minute run that i talk about my health that um

Speaker 2 I love doing it. It's like, I love when that portion of my act comes up.
I go, I I can't wait to get to the health stuff because I know it's going to kill.

Speaker 2 Because that, to me, is the best part of the special, I think, the health stuff. Everything else is good, but this is really.

Speaker 6 Blums me out to hear that you were hard on yourself about the last one, though.

Speaker 2 Yeah,

Speaker 2 terrible.

Speaker 2 Terrible. This is what happened with the last one.

Speaker 2 With a special, you got to hit it when the material, you're not tired of it.

Speaker 2 And it's very specific.

Speaker 2 It's a small window.

Speaker 2 with the last special, that was scheduled to happen, and then COVID hit. So I was sitting on that material for two years, and then I brought it back out and started touring with the video.

Speaker 6 Oh, and it was stale to you also.

Speaker 2 So it was like stale, number one. I was in pain, number two.
And I tried doing something different, performing in a tuxedo, which I never do.

Speaker 2 And when you're in a tuxedo and you're as physical as I am, your movement is constricted. It's just, you just feel tight.

Speaker 2 You know, I mean, you go to a wedding, you just, you know, like, yeah, nah, everything's tight.

Speaker 2 So that was a mistake I did. But, you know, sometimes it's like you want to try something a little bit out of the box, a little something new.

Speaker 2 You get bored doing the same thing with the, you know, the jacket and you know, sneakers, whatever. Yeah, let me dress it up.

Speaker 2 I told the audience to dress up because I wanted to take them back to 1960s Vegas.

Speaker 2 And I looked in the audience, there's like 30 people dressed up, you know, like nobody told you, you know, still a guy walking in and flip-flop.

Speaker 2 So I tried to do a little throwback, which I don't think really, really worked. But anyway,

Speaker 2 I wasn't extremely happy with it.

Speaker 6 Are you rough on yourself?

Speaker 6 Oh, yeah, terrible.

Speaker 2 Rough. Bad.

Speaker 2 Not good.

Speaker 6 That seems not healthy and almost. Nothing's healthy I do.

Speaker 2 It's just nothing I'm doing is for any positive mental attitude. All right, it's all negative all day long.

Speaker 2 That's not what I associate with laughter. Yeah, well, no, the byproduct is funny.

Speaker 2 But the day-to-day is negative.

Speaker 2 You got to snap out of that. Like, come on, now's a good time.
I wish I wish I could be more like you.

Speaker 2 I'm fine. I'm good.

Speaker 6 You don't want to be like me. I'm just saying, look, you have arrived.
Like,

Speaker 2 it's okay.

Speaker 6 I'm here to tell you. I'm pretty sure everyone here would agree with me.
Everyone watching this would say, this is a person who has arrived.

Speaker 6 There are many positive things that he has to be positive about.

Speaker 2 Yeah. No,

Speaker 2 that would be the normal way of looking at this. But there's nothing normal about me.
So I just look at it completely differently. Yeah, I mean, I'm hard on myself.
It's like you want to be the best.

Speaker 2 You want to be the best you can be. Sometimes when you get off stage, you're like, I don't know if that was the best I could have been.
Okay, but

Speaker 6 for a long time, I'm guessing that your standard there has been a great deal higher than most of the standards that are surrounding those arenas that are filled with people who leave laughing because they thought that you were about as good as you can be.

Speaker 2 Yeah, I mean,

Speaker 2 I think you have to put the bar extremely high to meet people's expectations and to meet my own expectations. So that's where that...

Speaker 6 But I think yours are tougher than most people's standards for that. The expectation of funny, given the career you've chosen, like it's built in and to me, it's terrifying.
The expectation of funny.

Speaker 6 One of the things that I get to rejoice in is that in sports, we surprise people with the funny. So there's never the expectation of funny.

Speaker 6 The burden of the expectation of funny is something that you've chosen as a living, and you've met it for 30 years.

Speaker 6 You've met...

Speaker 6 their standard, the subjective standard of what makes a whole wide range of people laugh. But you don't always meet yours.

Speaker 2 Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 2 Although I think having the standard, I mean, I look around, a lot of the standard in comedy is extremely low. And

Speaker 2 there's people making a living doing it.

Speaker 2 So I'm like.

Speaker 6 Yeah, but that's not your standard. Your standard isn't just making a living doing it.

Speaker 2 I know. What I'm saying is I want, when you come to see my show,

Speaker 2 I want you to leave going, it's the best comedy I've ever seen in my life. That's the goal for me.
Now, do people do that? Maybe. Do people say, oh, you know,

Speaker 2 but that's the expectation. When you leave, it's like, that's the best comedian I've ever seen.

Speaker 6 The last time I saw you in Las Vegas,

Speaker 6 I marveled at this part of your act. The fact that it looked like the whole thing you were winging it and it was crafted, sculpted perfectly.
There was not a hiccup in anything that you were doing.

Speaker 6 There was not a stumble on a word in anything that you did.

Speaker 2 Okay, see, so that, what you just said is what I love to hear because,

Speaker 2 and you hit it on the head, the stumble of the word. I have stumbled and I was like, fuck, fuck that whole run-up.

Speaker 2 Because as soon as you stumble on a word, the timing's gone, the momentum's gone, the next word is not going to be as funny because people are thinking about, did he just say,

Speaker 2 so

Speaker 2 for you to walk away. and think that that was off the top of my head, that is because

Speaker 2 I worked that material out back and forth and it sounds like it's just oh I know you manipulated me yeah I know it was a grand manipulation but that's the way I want you to feel that's the way I want you to feel and if you don't feel that way I feel like I've I've like let let you down as a as a customer as a paying customer I feel like you went out for a dinner and the filet wasn't cooked to your liking.

Speaker 2 So that's it. That's the pressure you got to put on yourself to make these fucking people laugh.

Speaker 6 That's it. It ain't right is the name of the special on Hulu, November 21st.
And SebastianLive.com is where you go. Ticket and tour dates are there.
He's great. He's always been great.

Speaker 6 He's always going to be great, even when he's doing physical comedy in his 80s and has morphed into his old man totally and completely.

Speaker 2 Well, thanks for having me on. I really appreciate it.
And you've always been very, very nice to share your audience with me. And it doesn't go unnoticed.

Speaker 6 Always good to talk to you. Thank you for spending this time with us.
You got it.

Speaker 7 Hey, Chris. Hey, Jeremy.
I've got kind of an open secret, but I want to tell you what it is here because Mike's not here right now. You better whisper.

Speaker 2 I really like it when the hurricanes lose and it gives me a reason to celebrate when I'm watching college football. Well, let's open a Miller Light in cheers.
Yeah, do you know? Exactly.

Speaker 2 That's what I was going to ask you. Do you know how I do that?

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Speaker 2 It's so good.

Speaker 8 Game day, it's different with Miller Light in your hand. You don't have to whisper the light.

Speaker 8 I can't stop.

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Speaker 9 I see one right now. I'm looking across the room.
I like the way that you flirt with Miller Light. I mean, it looks, look at it.

Speaker 1 It looks great.

Speaker 8 It's looking at me.

Speaker 9 You want to know why? I'm looking at it. It's looking at me.

Speaker 7 It's probably because it's just 96 calories and 3.2 carbs per 12 ounces. It's the original light beer since 1975, which means it's that Bob Ryan age.
Still hitting different five decades later.

Speaker 7 Miller Light, great taste, 96 calories. Go to millerlight.com/slash beach to find delivery options near you.
Or you can pick up some Miller Light pretty much anywhere they sell beer. It's Miller time.

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96 calories and 3.2 carbs per 12 ounces.

Speaker 2 Miller Light, I want you in me.