The Big Suey: Zaslow's Source

41m
"Please, God in heaven, tell me 'Yes.'"

The Lane Kiffin saga might be the most dramatic of his career, and that's saying something. Mike Ryan, a noted Journalist, has compiled the top 5 Best Nuggets of Information from This Coaching Cycle, but we all know Jonathan Zaslow is the real journalist on this show... or at least he was before we revealed his best source.
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Press play and read along

Runtime: 41m

Transcript

All right, Smirnoff, official vodka of the NFL, world's number one vodka. Chris Cody, you're with me here.
Smirnoff!

Wow, you're on the money with Smirnoff. Spinoff.
I'm gonna ask you, Chris, what's your favorite game day food? Smirnoff! Not your favorite game day drink. What's your favorite game day food? Smirnoff!

All right, here's the deal: game day is everything: the noise, the rituals, the passion, the dip, the wings, the dip again. Spirit off.

Smirnoff off belongs in that mix because if you're tailgating or hosting or just sitting there checking your fantasy lineup every 30 seconds, you need Smirnoff! Otherwise, it's not a real game day.

They've been doing it since 1864, which is, I don't even want to do the math. It's a long time.
It's like when Greg Cody was born. They're award-winning.

They make cocktails super easy and they're all about bringing fans together. So yeah, we do game days.
That's their thing. And if you're over 21, you should too.
Why, Chris? Smearing off.

Grab a bottle of Smearinoff at your local retailer and head to Smearinoff.com to find recipes of delicious cocktails perfect for game day. Smearing off! Please drink responsibly.
Smearing off.

Number 21, vodka distilled from grain, 40% alcohol by volume, the Smearin' Off Company. New York, New York.
Please do not share with anyone under legal drinking age. Smearing off.

Are you coming off a losing fantasy week? That means you're one week closer to losing your league and that's pretty stressful, which can lead to nighttime teeth grinding.

Dentech's mouth guards help with nighttime teeth grinding. Dentech wants to prevent teeth grinding while raising the fantasy stakes with a once-in-a-lifetime punishment.

If you want your league's last-place finisher to live in infamy at the 2026 Football All-Star Game, sign up for the ultimate fantasy football punishment at dentech.com/slash ultimate punishment.

No purchase necessary. Open to legal residents of the 50 U.S.
states and DC who are 21 years of age or older. Contest ends on December 8th, 2025.
Voidwear prohibited.

For details and official rules, visit dentech.com slash ultimate punishment.

So, listener, you're thinking about upgrading to the all-new iPhone 17 Pro, designed to be the most powerful iPhone ever.

But are you also thinking about the traffic on your way to the store or transferring all your data? Well, good news.

When you order a new phone online with Boost Mobile, they'll send an expert to your home or work to deliver your brand new iPhone 17 Pro and get you all set up on Boost Mobile within minutes.

No hassle. Visit boostmobile.com to get started.
Delivery available for select devices purchased at boostmobile.com. Terms apply.

Welcome to the Big SUI, presented by DraftKings. Why are you listening to this show? It's a podcast that seems very similar to the other Dan Lebatard podcast.

I'm sorry, I'm not going to apologize for that. In fact, the only difference seems to be this imaging.

I have been tempted in restaurants just walking past tables to grab somebody's prize that if they're just there. That hasn't happened to you guys.
I've done it.

And now, here's the marching man to nowhere, fat face, and the habitual liar.

This episode of the Dan Lebatt show is presented by DraftKings. DraftKings, the crown is yours.

Before I get to one of the rarest of things ever seen around here,

the righteous Roy

Rage.

Because we have converted, and I think this might just be Jeremy that converted it, but I don't think I've ever seen Roy this impassioned about feeling wronged around sports because he keeps going back to 2000.

He keeps going back to a scar from 25 years ago when Miami was argued out of a championship back then in a way that was clearly unreasonable to anybody who's ever watched football.

And it's also important to point out as well, Roy, not just that they didn't qualify for the game, but the team that made it ahead of them scored two points in the championship. It's ridiculous.

Now, granted, yes, they lost to Washington, who was 15th ranked, right? But they worked their way back up to seventh in the AP poll. Wow.
Beat Florida. It was the first game of the year, Washington.

Second,

the first game of the year shouldn't have crazy relevance, Zaslow. Hmm.

The loss in the first week of the season shouldn't be carrying weight at the end of the year? Hmm. How interesting how your argument changes 25 years later when your program is benefiting from it.

Roy, he's talking to you. No, we can't shut him up.
I'm with Roy.

He's changing. That was a rough year.
That was a nice. Remember, Oregon also beat Washington, so they also had like a weird head-to-head argument.
Don't forget about that.

The argument's Miami and FSU. Yeah, Miami was ranked number two in all the polls, but the BCS had Miami behind FSU, who Miami beat earlier in that year.

The game, the national title game, was the Orange Bowl, if you remember. 13-2.
Yeah. What a disgrace.
Man, that was a... Miami would have rolled that Oklahoma dude.
Would have killed them.

They absolutely would have. And

they beat number two, Virginia Tech. Okay, look,

I have found it interesting, okay?

I really have found this interesting, what we're about to talk about, because Lane Kiffin is the greatest of the used car salesmen who has realized through the bowels of what Nick Sabin built, oh, we're going to dilute all this shit so much that what used to be one loss kills you.

One loss kills you so that we still remember it 20 years later. Oh, right.
Dorsey went up to Washington and lost on the road in the second game of the season. Otherwise, Miami's unbeaten, right?

But unbeaten doesn't matter anymore. Like, that's ridiculous.
Ohio State and Indiana are going to play, and all that unbeaten gets them is a buy, which isn't...

It's not nothing, but it's still not much considering what the stakes of that game would be. And this is the best Indiana team we've ever seen, right?

Like, this is the top of the sport can now be run by grifter Lane Kiffin being most griftery because he does not care about whatever you think the sanctuary of sports are. It's a business venture.

And if you told him when he got to Mississippi, day he signed, hey, Lane, you're going to be able to springboard this into the LSU job, he would have said, yep, can we speed it up?

Can we make that faster? Because I'm only here to get there. I'm only here.

Like, this is as cutthroat as any we've seen in terms of cutting through the bullshit of what the bureaucracy of this machine is, the economy of it.

Lane Kiffett ruled it just because Florida wanted something. something.
And LSU said, nah, we've been embarrassed enough by Brian Kelly and this.

We're going to fix it right now with 13 and 25 for his career against ranked teams. That has never had expectations.

Lane Kiffen, like not in college sports, because what Lane, the burning path that Lane Kiffen has built to this rehabilitation is staggering where it's like, yep, 12 million a year.

I'll take whatever job I want. I won't recruit.
It's just for play calling. Get me the athletes.

I'll call the plays and I'll do something here that feels surgical because I did it with small players at FAU and I could take it anywhere. And Mississippi, I don't care about you.

Yeah, I'll do the whole Marty Smith dance in a barn or a field. But I never, Lane Kiffin was always bokeh.
Lane Kiffin was never Mississippi.

Lane Kiffin went to Mississippi just so that he could get back to something that felt more like bokeh. Can I get to the Tampa Bay Bucks head coaching job? Can I get back to Florida?

But how different is Baton Rouge?

That's Baton Rouge is different than Mississippi. Look, Mississippi, Mississippi is the poorest

Mississippi in our country.

Has a lot of poverty that you feel everywhere.

And the fact that he's won by what he was calling a brown lake to rehabilitate himself so that he could get to the point where he could choose between LSU and Florida.

And Florida could get it to SEC feelings hurt because LSU big boyed him.

LSU, after embarrassing themselves in the Brian Kelly sweepstakes, they want to play at the top of the sport and they're willing to give the job to just call the plays.

Like, we don't care what else you do. Just call the plays for our athletes because we've got the athletes to beat Oklahoma on the road.
And

we feel like we can win with Les Miles and we can win with Ed Orgeron. And we're LSU.
We deserve to be at the top of this conference.

To see the business of this play out over the weekend, it was greasy, it was gross, and it's the truest thing you'll ever see.

Like, it's Lane Kiffin cut through the swamp of this just to get to Baton Rouge, and then the next job, he hopes, will be whatever the professional one is when he gets to be a genius because everybody wants him to be the next Saban.

At what point when he was preying on what decision to make,

did he realize I should also threaten my coaching staff? They have to come with me now or never come at all.

I don't know how real that part was. I mean, clearly, a lot of the coaches.
The praying part?

Well,

about the threat.

More so the implications, as it might have been implied, but the entire offensive staff appears to be

on that plane with Lane to Baton Rouge. Can I go down this path, please? Because, Zaz, I know that you've been close to this, close to college football.
You've done some reporting.

You were the first to report on. I reported over a week ago on ESPN radio.
No one seems to give me that hat tip. Yeah, that's incredible.
You're not getting credit for reporting this accurately.

Wait a minute. That's amazing.
You. Okay, so he did report, though, on ESPN.

Lane Kiffen was going to LSU, but Mike Ryan has also learned a great deal about the business of this and was texting both me and Zazzy. You're on the come up, Mike.
I'll admit, thank you.

Me and Zaz all weekend.

Before the news broke, Mike Ryan knows the people who are talking about the things that would sort of give him information around Lane Kiffin that I believe he has that no one else would have, just because Mike's sort of looking at all of this.

interested in the business of it, but also with some journalistic standards of his own. And so the information he's giving me.
I'm asking that as a question.

Because he wanted me to confirm I can confirm we kicked everybody's ass on a lane story like we were a week

we were a week ahead of everything yep we were telling you who was faking it what was posturing we were told you we were telling you what was gonna happen and then we learned who doesn't have any journalistic integrity because I didn't see any of them credit me So I'll get back to that.

No, well, it's not a bit.

The one where he texts me what's going to happen and then takes credit for it. I don't like it.
I don't know what you're talking about.

Don't worry about how I get my information. You know what? That's exactly how I'm going to leave it.
Don't worry. That was actually a good line.
Don't worry how I get my information.

You get it from me. Did I

just reveal the source? Do you not hear what I said? You don't reveal sources. Don't worry how I get my information.
He's not. He's just saying, he's just protecting his journalistic standards.

You should learn from him. Look, you're in the shadows.

of you you've known everything that's going on here and I do believe people need to see with the maximum sort of reported details because we've learned in recent years that some insiders are bought and that

the information unless they give me enough money you Mike you have to have been on the inside of what felt dirty where Lane Kiffin is treating all of this as like privately I'm the coach who gives the least amount of bleeps.

I don't care whether I coached the last game or not. I mean, I'd like to.
I think he cared. He did, but it's not for the reasons that everyone's saying.

Yeah, he wants to be there for the kids and win a national title. That's on the list.

But the last week of posturing has been just, are we going to fire Lane or is LSU going to give us money for taking him?

This is all about Lane wanting his contract and LSU coming to the table and Ole Miss not wanting to have to pay Lane to fire him, even though they told him, you can't come into work.

So that's what's been happening over the last week. Lane made his decision last Friday.

as we told you during that show there's a decision happening today and it doesn't look like it's going to be florida the last week has been let's see what happens in the sec title game and let's argue about are we going to fire you or is lsu going to pay us to take you and that fight is still going on what would have happened if auburn came back and won that game saturday night because we were all sitting around waiting all day long for the decision that lane market expected and then it became a thing where it's like all right well what if auburn wins tonight or That's clearly what we're waiting for now.

What if Auburn did win that game?

I happen to think, not happen to know, but I think if Ulmiss was in that SEC title game, then a loss again can hurt them because the committee could say, look, your coach is leaving.

You have two losses now. You're not going to be the same team going forward.
Oh, you think the committee could possibly penalize teams for losing in the conversation?

It's in their criteria. It's literally spelled out.
They didn't do that last year. It's spelled out.

I think they're good because they won the Egg Bowl, but if they lost the Egg Bowl, I can tell you, like, they'd be out. They'd be out.

I really did think, okay,

let me backtrack a little bit on this Lane story because, Mike, I'd like you to gather yourself and just give me the five most interesting morsels that you have seen in just being interested on how the mechanics of all of this works.

Where Lane Kiffen goes through the Nick Sabin path of rehab to professional coaches stop here here for a second before they get on to that next thing.

Sarkesian got the best job in the sport and got it fairly quickly. So, and Cristobal, after failing at FIU, leaving FIU, how would we appraise

you? Okay, but fine,

but ends up rehabilitating his career by going through Nick Sabin.

I'd like the five most interesting things you have. I felt bad for Marty Smith this weekend.
I've been calling Marty Smith. I keep checking in on him.

He has aged a great deal over the course of the weekend. That seems like photos.
Chasing. No,

this is what happened to Marty. He's very healthy and he's fit, but you cannot be near that Brown Lake in Mississippi and chase Lane Kiffen around for 36 hours without being made totally crazy.

That's the worst assignment of Marty Smith's career. That man's been on the White House lawn throwing a football.

He didn't live to dodge fire trucks in Mississippi trying to get to the bottom of whether Lane Kiffen is going to get his next grift at Florida LSU or stay at Mississippi for all the money in the world.

It's not Nick Sabin that was out there as the college coach free agent. Lane Kiffen has never coached a playoff game.
It's crazy the coverage that we've done over this.

Hey guys, Tony here. The NBA on Prime is back with an exciting week of Emirates NBA Cup action.
The knockout rounds start with the quarterfinal doubleheaders on Tuesday and Wednesday night.

Then the Quest for the Cup heads to Vegas for a semifinal doubleheader on Saturday. It all culminates with the championship game next Tuesday night.
If you're not a Prime member, that's not a problem.

Sign up for a 30-day free trial to get started today. Emirates NBA Cup coverage continues this week only on Prime.
Restrictions apply. See amazon.com slash Amazon Prime for details.

On Fox One, you can stream your favorite live sports so you're there for the biggest moments as they happen.

For me, I cannot deal with spoilers, so I need to see it live, especially on college football Saturdays and NFL Sundays. With Fox One, you get it all.

NASCAR, the MLB postseason, edge of your seat plays, jaw-dropping moments, and that rush like you're right there in the action. Sports are meant to be watched live, and you can do that with Fox One.

Fox One, we live for live, streaming now.

If you could stop somebody from breaking in before they got inside your house, why wouldn't you?

Most old school systems only go off after somebody's already in your place, opening your fridge, petting your dog. Whatever.
At that point, it's too late. It's reactive.
Simply Safe is different.

It's proactive with this double layer of defense that helps stop crime before it even starts.

First, their AI-powered cameras spot potential threats outside, not just in motion, but an actual person lurking around in the bushes behind a tree, in a car, under the car, wherever they may be.

Then live monitoring agents jump in right away. They talk to the person through the camera, let them know they're on video and that cops are getting called if they don't leave.

That's how you stop crime before it starts. Personally, I trust Simply Safe to protect what matters most at my house, my wife, my daughter, my possessions, my things, my home, my safety, my peace.

I trust that to Simply Safe. That's it.
That's the list. No long-term contracts, no hidden fees, and Simply Safe was just named the best home security in 2025 by U.S.
News and World Report.

Right now, it's the best time to jump in. Simply Safe's last chance, Black Friday sale, 50% off any new system.
Go to simplysafe.com/slash DLB. Again, that's simplysafe.com/slash DLB.

There is no safe like SimplySafe.

Don Lebatard.

Mike Bryan's in there, there and he's the one with a baby he's the one who's got to like worry about what the future is and mike ryan bet on draft kings because mike ryan bet on us this is the bet you're afraid of doubling down on putting up a billboard in edmonton stugats i care more about matthew kaccuk than i do my daughter this is the dan lebatard show with the stugats

It is sheer lunacy, but it's about fame. It's what they've done with the mercenary.
Brian Kelly will buy your coach. Oh, you're embarrassing.
Never mind. Marcus Freeman is the new hot thing.

Brian Kelly, you're out. Like, we'll burn through it quicker now because LSU has the, has the money allegedly to get in the game.

Because when I read, well, you, if you guys are reading any of the details on how Brian Kelly and LSU were fighting over this money and how silly some of it was, and in some cases, they don't always know if they have the money.

They'll sort of just figure it out by bringing a swirl around their program.

Look, Colorado is going to pay for years of Colorado football just because what Dion did with what we were doing with coaches.

So of course, if that's what we're going to make the coaches is the hood ornaments of the business, are you famous? What Lane Kiffen is, it's not win or win with expectations.

What Lane Kiffin has done the best in his rehab tour,

because he has called plays, that's right up there, but it's also being a personality of renegade that says bleep you, who clearly doesn't seem to care very much what you think of him in any sort of way, professionally or personally, but we'll say after the slate of games this weekend, the most important game is the one I'm going to tonight with my son, Knox.

That's the only game that matters. And we told you, Knox had all the influence here when it came to Lane going to LSU.
All right, I have a top five, and it's not just about Lane.

It's about all the ramifications of Lane's decision and all this stuff is button up journalistically in a way that you're not getting anywhere else. Number one.
John, number five.

Well, yeah, number five. John Summerall was initially kind of a joke at the start of this entire process.
John Summerall.

Mike, do you not know how to play this game? Do you want to start? Well, there's a lot of dancing here. Look, let me.
No, you're not dancing well. All right, let's start it again.

Let's go ahead and start. Let's get started.
We started with one or five. Okay, stop.

All right, I got it. No more interruptions.
Here we go. Number five, John Summerall was initially a joke in this experience.

Auburn and Auburn was being applied a lot of pressure from LSU and Florida when there were initial leaks about John Summerall being linked to both LSU and Florida.

And part of that was LSU and Florida were trying to get John Summerall hired over at Auburn. Did you, Zasla, report anything about this on ESPN?

Yeah, I said Summerall was going to be announced as the Florida Gator head coach on Sunday. Before Mike? I said that on Friday night.
You said that before me, but after my text to him.

Yo, what did I already tell you about that? I have the proof. This is a very awkward situation that we have going on.
I want people to come out against Adam Schefter like that. But I told Adam.

Well, number four. Are you using Zaz as a puppy name? Number four.

No, someone's being used, and it's very clearly me.

Number four. Wait a minute.
Zaz is just checking in on you. Mike, how's it going?

How do you know I got it from you? Look, Zaz has been reporting things weeks ahead of everybody else. Weeks ahead of accurately? He hasn't gotten a thing wrong yet, correct?

Maybe you're like my third source.

You referred to Kiffin to LSU as done a week ago. Yup, over a week ago, I should say.

Why are your things not getting traction? I don't know. That's what I already said.

Anyone out there who tweets out about Lane Kiffen and Sumerall 2 for that matter, and you don't do that hat tip, you know about that hat tip, Dan?

That's where you do the H and you do the slash and the T. That means you're giving somebody credit on Twitter.
That's how hat tip works.

Have some integrity. You know how top fives work.
That stands for hat tip?

That does stand for hat tip. Why did I think think it was hat tip no but i think zaslow deserves more than this zaszlo is breaking the news and not getting any credit for being an insider what is

what is the list of things yep okay so there was lane kiffen also is your list or mike's where are we this is this is the list i came in here three mondays ago i think it was and what did i say that morning i said nico harrison gonna get fired today.

I think you posed it as a question. Nope.
No, no, he no, no. But it was still a good thought of like, could he get fired today? Like, you did it.

You pronounced report wrong. It was a good report.
Nico Harrison got fired that day. It wasn't a question.
It was a report.

Did we forget to say it? Yeah.

Yeah. He came into the meeting with that news and it broke two hours later.
True.

My fault. My fault.
I have bombshell reporting here. Please read what is on your screen right now.
This is a time stamp from Friday. This is unprecedented.

You can go ahead and read word for word, play by play.

Source outing the report. You can read play by play here if you'd like.
Unprecedented.

What is happening here? Can you go ahead and read this? Friday. Jealous.
4:21. It's freezing here in Norman.
I'm completely unprepared for this weather. Worse than last week.
I'm embarrassed.

There's a text. Can you confirm that this is a text from you? True story.
True story. All right.
I just volunteered that 17 in Pittsburgh and what, you were dealing with 40 degrees in Norman.

Yeah, but it was really windy. Zaz goes, do you have a coat? I don't.
I didn't even bring my hooded sweat. Yeah, see, I'm just checking in on you here.
Yeah.

I'm like, yes, I brought that because I'm an adult. Zaz, I'm embarrassed.
And then, let's scroll down. This is still Friday, Summer All the Florida.
We'll be announced Sunday, laying the LSU tomorrow.

I'm going to announce it on an ESM tonight. Your intentions are spelled out.
You know what? What are you saying? I'm going to stop telling you. Such a betrayal.

You just slapped me in the face if I'm an introvert. Such a betrayal.
You know what?

You know what? Leave that on the screen. This is not even a betrayal.
Dan, calm down. You don't even have to be upset for me, okay? Because nowhere here.
Thank you for the proof.

Thank you, Mike, for helping me out here. Because nowhere did I ask for anything.
I didn't ask any questions. You just all of a sudden said, you all of a sudden

sum roll to Florida. We'll be announced Sunday lane to LSU tomorrow.
I read that online. I'm like, yeah, I already know that.
So I'm going to tell Mike

to pronounce it on ESPN tonight. Hold on.
Be very careful here. Are you arguing that you never ask me what's going to happen?

I'm telling you. Because I got that text, too.
In this situation, I got that text, too. I already knew this.
Hmm. Oh, it was just implied.
Like, of course, why is this guy telling me the obvious?

I didn't imply shit. You just all of a sudden decided

what I knew. Number four.
Wait, wait, wait. We'll get to number four in a second, Mike.
I do want to come back here, though, in defense of Zaz here. What are you doing? Well, because.

In defense of Zaz. He is just...
It is obvious what he is doing. Head to head has to matter.

First of all, it's obvious what you're doing, which is trying to out yourself as a source when

he has not confirmed that you're a source. And what I thought was

put it back up on the screen, please. What I initially thought was you providing clear and obvious proof that you were the one that gave Zaz that information.

I'll go to jail before I reveal my source. These text exchanges do not actually confirm your case because it could be read that Zazzlow was saying to you,

Yeah, I'm going to report it tonight. Yep.
And you're saying, I'm never telling you anything again. I don't care.
And you saying, you don't care. I'm an insider.
I don't need you. Sick.

You know, that was Mike. Played yourself.
Put it on the poll, please, at Lebatard Show. Did Mike Ryan play himself? Number four, Mike.
I would like some context there.

Number four, Scott Strickland and all this.

Scott Strickland is the AD. So remember what I told you at number five.
I know we have quite an amount of time that has gone between number five and number four. I'm aware of that.

So initially, John Summerall was just being invoked as kind of of force Auburn's hand.

Once it became clear last Friday that Lane Kiffen was not going to Florida, Florida has a problem on their hands because they were convinced Lane was going there. They were convinced.

And now they have to go to a backup plan. Scott Strickland, he has got a booster issue and he's embattled over there despite being on a hot seat, even though he won a national title in Basketball.

He's also a basketball school.

He won a national title and yet he's on the hot seat. So he's got a clash.

Boosters that feel wronged by Lane Kiffen, because he kind of did wrong them, that want to make a huge splash, and him seizing on this opportunity, like

the lane thing was a lane thing, but now I want a head coach that I can control. And I don't want to go after Lincoln Riley like you're telling me to.

I don't want to go after Dabo like you're telling me to. We're losing time here.
We can't get caught with our pants down even more. We have to hit this ground running.

So after John Summerall initially canceled a meeting with Florida because he knew he was a pawn in all of this, they come back to John Summerall and offer him half. It wasn't their first choice.

Eli Drinkwitz over at Missouri was. But Scott Strickland kind of wants to control the head coach.
He doesn't want a strong personality over there.

And in digging on Eli, he realized he kind of pushed out the last AD in Mizzou. I don't like that.
I'm going with Summerall.

So there's a lot of information there, Zaslow, and I want to tackle some of it here because

in the business of sport, what everyone just saw publicly is after stumbling through the Brian Kelly stuff, LSU still looked over in Florida and said, no, we want him. That's number three.

Brian Kelly got fired because Billy Napier got fired. That's why it timed out the way that it did.
Because everyone knew Lane was going to Florida. This was an open secret.

The plans were laid down on the ground for this like two years ago. If everybody knew if Billy Napier struggled, Lane Kiffin was going to be the guy.

Under normal circumstances, Brian Kelly would finish the season, but these weren't normal circumstances. LSE wanted to throw its bleep on the table and say, you think you're getting Lane Kiffen?

We're a much better job. We're not this clown show, even though the governor's getting involved.
We'll tidy it up, and we'll offer Lane the same amount of money.

And if all things are equal, we're the better job. By the way, Summerall ended up accepting an offer for half of what Florida was offering Lane Kiffin.
So that deserves more fanfare there.

I also just wanted to... He happens to know? Yeah, I mean, that, okay, but I thought literal fanfare as opposed to, because he says,

that felt like it happened in L within the top five. But just, and as you see the tectonic plate shift on salaries,

because, I mean, you're looking at Missouri and Vanderbilt are in the SEC game. They've never played in that actual top tier before, right? So this is Vanderbilt's first

10-win season ever, I think. And Missouri just got Drinkwits $10 to $11 million a year, $12 million a year, as Lane goes to LSU for $12 million a year.
It's going to be more than that.

Summerall and Eli Scher are an agent too, so that was ever present here.

The shifting away from Brian Kelly into the next hot thing, it's funny and it's short-sighted, but let's get to number two here because

the amazing thing about Lane, again, I keep saying it, 13 and 25 against ranked teams, he's not willing to recruit. He's just there to call plays and be the face for your program.

Like, this is a person who's saying with not a great winning record against ranked teams, I'm only willing so hard to work at these parts of the job. The one I want to do is I call plays on Saturday.

That's what I do. Get me the best players and I'll run your business from calling plays on Saturday.
And just the brand alone guarantees you top five in high school recruiting.

Ole Miss does really well in recruiting, but they have to hit the portal hard over there.

And Lane isn't really built for year in, year out consistency over at Ole Miss because that's tougher tougher to recruit high school kids.

You have one of the best, most talent-rich high school football states in the nation in Louisville.

You already have an NIL squad over there and the support from an athletic department that has all these templates that you can plug and play. And Lane Kiffin is actually reveling in that.

This show is sponsored by BetterHelp. The holidays are coming up, which means traditions.

Some families have these beautiful, wholesome rituals, and then some of us are just trying to keep our family from arguing over who ruined the stuffing last year.

But this time of year can also be a lot. It gets dark at 4.30, everyone's stressed, and suddenly the holidays go from magical to nightmare.

It's time to start some new traditions, ones that aren't chaotic. Therapy can be one of those new traditions, and BetterHelp makes it easy to fit into your life.

They've got over 30,000 licensed therapists. They've helped more than 5 million people, and they've been doing this for over 12 years.

Plus, they average a 4.9 rating for more than 1.7 million reviews, which is better consistency than any team I root for gives me during the holiday season.

You fill out a quick questionnaire, they match you with someone who fits your needs, and if it's not the right fit, you can switch therapists anytime.

This December, start a new tradition by taking care of you. Our listeners get 10% off at betterhelp.com/slash DLB.
That's better H-E-L-P dot com slash DLB.

Holidays? Fun. Holidays as a dad? Tough.
Travel, gifts, matching pajamas. Don't get me started on matching pajamas.
It's hot in Miami. My wife says, why don't you want to do this with us?

My daughter's crying. Anyways, school parties, hosting a family.
Next thing I know, I basically put Christmas on my credit card and have no idea what I spent where.

If you want to keep your finances under control this holiday season, you need to be using Monarch, rated Wall Street Journal's best budgeting app at 25.

Monarch's the all-in-one personal finance tool that brings your entire financial life together in one clean interface on your laptop or on your phone.

Right now, just for our listeners, Monarch is offering 50% off your first year. a massive deal.

Monarch showed me how fast the holiday budget was disappearing, flights, gifts, late-night online shopping, and helped me pump the brakes before the bill hit.

Now, my wife and I do quick money check-ins, look at our holiday spending category, and actually enjoy the holidays without starting January and the new year in panic.

Don't let financial opportunity slip through the cracks. Use code DAN at monarchmoney.com in your browser for half off your first year.

That's 50% off your first year at monarchmoney.com with code DAN. And don't give me those matching pajamas, I swear.

It's the holiday season. Fantasy football probably not going your way like most of America.
Your football team, hopefully you're still in the mix.

If your college football team is in the mix, congratulations, you've made it this far. Why don't you toast your friends with some Miller Light at the holiday party? It is a surefire winner.

It's the holiday season right now, so why don't you celebrate the 50th anniversary of my favorite beer, Miller Light.

Every time I crack open a Miller Light, I look around at my friends and family and I think, yeah, this was a right call. It's a taste you know you can depend on.

Brewed for flavor with simple ingredients like malted barley, rich balanced toffee notes, and that iconic golden color.

And at 96 calories and 3.2 carbs per 12 ounces, it lets you enjoy the season without weighing you down. The best holiday beers are the ones you don't expect.
Miller Light, great taste, 96 calories.

Go to millerlight.com slash Dan to find delivery options near you. Or you can pick up some Miller Light pretty much anywhere they sell beer.
Tis Miller time. Celebrate responsibly.

Miller Brewing Company, Milwaukee, Wisconsin. 96 calories, 3.2 carbs per 12 ounces.

Don Lebatard. Davoy is Captain Slappy.
Stugats. Is this Chum Bucket? This is the Don Lebatar Show with the Stugats.

If I can, just for the history of what LSU is as it comes in in Big Boys, Florida, okay? Did I say Louis Voir? I meant Louisa Arnold.

Nick Sabin knows that you climb through that portion of the swamp, get the best players you can build your Alabama elsewhere. Just get the best players.

It's pretty simple what Nick Sabin built.

I can't believe that he was able to sustain it with distance for such a long time, but it's his greatest regret, he says, of his career, is that he went to, that he didn't stay at LSU, that he feels like he could have built all of that at LSU, and he could have, so much so that what he left in his wake, even in that conference, before it became the thing that birthed Missouri's and Vanderbilts all of a sudden, that are now profit centers out of nowhere, Vanderbilt's first 10-win season ever.

Then wins championships for two people in Ed Orgeron and Les Miles. That's, let's just say,

more of the Neanderthal version of whatever the play caller Lane Kiffen mercenary is. Les Miles and Ed Orgeron aren't the reason the program won.

Ed Orgeron had the best team I've ever seen in college. Is Orgeron going to be on the Lane Kiff and staff? I think so.
He'll be recruiting. Yeah, it's pretty cool.

I told you there's real steam behind that. So, where are we?

Real steam behind that. Wait a minute.

I told you there's real steam behind that scene. I don't have imaging for that.
I should have new imaging. I think that there's real steam.

Well, Dave, let me ask you a question because you're an Ed Orgeron insider. You see him running on the beach.
Have you seen him running on the beach in the last week? I have not.

He might be running in a bio. Okay.
He said he'd take his truck in in a day to go meet Lane Kiff and do the recruiting. He's worked on a staff before the recruiting for him.

Yeah, he's worked on his staff before. So

number two in all this, Lane daring Ole Miss to fire him.

It's not the kids. I told you this.
It's not about the kids. It's not even about the CFP.
This is all about money. I understand.

It seems like the most obvious thing in the world, Ole Miss being like, we don't want you to be coaching here because you're just going to try to steal our players while you're actively doing it.

Signing day is in January.

Why would we have a lame duck head coach that will only be, yeah, meet, I'm sure he'll try to be winning the games, but he's going to be in that building with our kids trying to steal our guys?

I get that. But now you've guaranteed that he's going to be outside your building trying to steal your kids.

So there's an argument to be made to just have Lane Kiffen stick around, but I get why Olmis is burned and didn't want that. What's going to be fascinating to see is how does this actually shake out?

Is he getting fired because he wants to come into work and he's being told no? Or is his buyout going to be paid by LSU? I think all that stuff is still being figured out.

How can anyone think it'd be appropriate for him to continue coaching the team for what they would hope, what they would hope would be another month and a half? All right.

I think Sumrall's coaching to Lane. Different situation.

How can anyone think it's okay for, let's say we're at the beginning of January, and instead of getting ready to play in the national semifinal, Lane Kiffen is out recruiting and putting stuff together for, oh, yeah, the other team in the SEC.

Same league, the other team in the SEC

also coaches. But the lack of perspective that allows a sentence to, you know, just hit off the stray end of the business of this is

we can't have Lane around the kids. He'll steal them.

He's going to be outside your building trying to steal your kids is a real sentence.

No, but it's how you build.

It's how you build the program. Well, okay, so let's examine for a second the real deep history, because I don't know what your number one is here on Lane Kiffin.
Let me be clear about this.

I think this is understood, is it not? What?

Lane Kiffin

does not give a f

about your construct on what you think the business of sports are.

He has less give up than anybody.

And so Lane Kiffin controlling the entire sport and being covered like he's Nick Sabin sends Marty Smith out. Where was he? He's moving around fire trucks.
Marty Smith had a very bad 36 hours.

I'm trying to get a hold of Marty. Marty is all of a sudden hard to get a hold of.
That's never been the case before, but Marty,

I am saying that the last 36 hours of Marty Smith's life are something that he did not enjoy. Like maybe getting this is something, but Marty knows what the grift is.

He knows he's interviewing a used car salesman. He shouldn't have to chase him around for 36 hours to get the exclusive so that he can interview him on a, on a, on a tarmac that's dusty.

I want to play from the night before. What we're looking at here is the interview when he made his decision.

The night before, this is just a 16-second clip of how broken Marty Smith was doing this reporting. I wrote him

at

8.46 Central Time and said, will there be a resolution tonight? Please, God in heaven, heaven, tell me yes.

So that's where he was lately. That's not journalism, Marty.
Marty, this is not journalism we're doing when you're chasing someone around fire truck and saying, Please end this, sir.

Put me out of my misery. There'll be a resolution tonight.
Please, God, in heaven, tell me yes. He knows this is wrong what they're doing to Marty Smith.

When Marty was given that gig, he definitely thought it was gonna be like one stand-up and then go, Come on. Please, God, in heaven.
We can't be in on the grifth of the business of this so much.

Please, God in heaven, tell me yes. Marty's like, let me get back to the football.
I want football Saturdays are fun. What is this nonsense? I mean to chase Lane Kiffin around.

What does God in heaven tell me? Lane, I know what you are. We all know what you are who cover this sport.

We kind of like it.

We kind of like that you're dirty.

You tell the truth. But then he got him for that interview and he asked all the right questions.
And the five-minute interview was just, oh, it was all right. Lane gave him the proper amount of time.

Lane and Marty go way back. All right, so is Mississippi what sounds worth playing here here on where Mississippi's going to get back get mad before we get to Mike's number one?

I like let's just play the first one where Lane just kind of gives him credit for all the reporting he's done.

Well first I just watched you do something unbelievable and go off-road around the fire trucks to get here. So amazing job by you.
You know that this was a very challenging, difficult day.

You know, we went through a lot last night with Keith Carter trying to figure out a way, you know, to make this playoff, you know, run work and be able to coach the team.

And at the end of the day, that's his decision. And I totally respect that.
I understand that decision. And,

you know, so I just totally wish the team the best of luck, wish that I was coaching, but understand that it was a very challenging position for him and the chancellor to be in and totally respect that.

So,

you know, just really, really hope they play really well and go win the national championship.

Lane Kiffin's going to be outside your building trying to steal your kids. It's wild.
He's like, you went around a fire chart. Like, what if Marty Smith got arrested trying to do something?

I think Marty, I'm guessing that Marty Smith

had a rented truck and did go

off-roading. I think that Marty broke the law in order to get that interview, but also questioned his life and his self-worth while he did that.
Please, God in heaven, tell me.

Like, this is not what we do with our sources, Marty. You know better than this.

So

let's hear Lane saying that he is also mad and hurt because he can't go back and talk to his team. And the professional of this doesn't even allow him to be human.

You know, again, I totally respect Keith's decision.

So that was his decision. Yeah, yeah, he asked me not to come to the meeting and said I couldn't come, but which I totally understand.

You know, I don't know that I necessarily agree with that, you know, we're trying to find a way, you know, to make this work and coach the team and give the team the best chance to win.

But I also, you know, he's got a job to do. And like he said, he has to live here.

So, like he said, maybe all the national people understand why why he should let me coach, but he has to live here and it's a little different when you're the AD. So totally respect that.

And Keith has been amazing to us over the six years. You can't commit to go work for a competing rival and stay in your current job for possibly another two months.

Oh, but I thought that he has to live here was an elbow.

Like that, that sound, oh my God. Like in terms of Lane trying to publicly do this is about God and family, and I got an important game with Knox tonight that's the most important game in my life.

As he has to do that to keep up the veneer of this,

I thought for him to hit him in the elbow with something that is he has to live here, which makes it

sound like, well, he's got to live with the fandom as I take off in a private jet. He has to live in the community, but it's also the slight of you have to live here.
I never live here.

I never wanted to live here. Well, I thought it was just the former there.
So, like you said, maybe all the national people understand why he should let me coach, but he has to live here.

That is actually worse than he has to live here, which is like he's kind of small time in Ole Miss.

I understand why everyone in the nation would want me coaching Ole Miss because I am the program, but, you know, he's got to live here.

This is how you graduate to all the things Lane Kiffin has graduated toward. What else from that interview is worth playing, Chris?

I think we hit the good stuff there. That was pretty revelatory, him volunteering to Marty that they were working on an agreement that protected Ole Miss.

Obviously, Ole Miss wasn't satisfied with the level of protection, but now... How can they be protected? I get it.

It does seem like the most obvious thing in the world, but now he doesn't have any restrictions or an agreement in place, and he's got the power of LSU, and he's already shit posting spot the ball.

So he's going to be coming after your kids full bore now while you're trying to avoid a college football playoff distraction. I don't think you're going to to get that.

And oldness gets to keep their integrity. You know, I mean, no, but hold on.
That matters. That matters, does it? That matters when you're spurned like this.

When someone says, You're not good enough for me, I'm going elsewhere. Basically, at that point, all you have is your integrity.

But they're not good enough for him, and they won't be as good as they are right now.

They have a legitimate chance to win in the college football playoff with the most creative offensive mind in the sport, with a great offense that can go win this thing.

And to have him now devoting all of his time to this other program, at least make him do a time split.

Even if he was there trying to recruit your kids over, ultimately and stealing your kids from outside of your building, he'd be doing it from inside of the building where he could help lead them to a championship.

We've seen coaches do this before.

We've seen coaches that have gone elsewhere, started recruiting for the other school, flown back, coached their team into these important bowl games, and it's ultimately affected them in a negative way.

Okay, it'll be coached them in ab bowl games. How do you know? No, I'm talking about past examples.

Like, past examples was coaching in ab bowl game, when now it's coaching the team for almost another two months. Well, it was already a month and a half.
Signing day falling in that window.

The difference now is National Signing Day happens while the college football playoff is. I'm going to say it.

Having him be distracted while trying to coach Ole Miss can only help you if you're Ole Miss and you're getting your next coach in line.

To me, I'll say it. This calendar's wacky.
It is. It really is.
No, No, but you know what? That's a cop-out, man. The whole calendar thing.
Lane Kiffen made a choice to go coach somewhere else.

Who cares what the calendar is? It's a wacky calendar. It's a wacky calendar, but again, do you realize we're laughing? Think about what we're talking about here.

Marty Smith has been aged by the process of Lane Kiffin will be outside your building trying to steal your kids.

It's asinine.

It's just the silliest of the stupidity

around all of this money.

We're just judging the games with arguments, and it's not real. It's all made for television bullshit, and Lane Kiffin runs the business.
Mike, what's number one?

Let's go full circle with number one because John Summerall went from pawn, knowing he was a pawn, to having an offer on the table from Auburn, and having an offer on the table from Florida midweek that he was trying to...

Sorry, that's my bad.

Trying to decide between Auburn and Florida. the decision was made.

He knew that he was a pawn for Florida and a backup plan, but Auburn was forcing him to keep guys like Durkin on his staff, and he didn't feel like he had the autonomy over his staff at Auburn, which is why he goes back and takes half of what they offered to Lane and land it on Florida.

I think that Zaz is more of an insider than you are.

All right, you're on the come up. Cool.
I'm just gonna leave this segment early. You can be hurt by that, but Zazzlo, I mean, Zazzlow keeps working hard.

So did we!

You're a rising star. This podcast is brought to you by Square.
Okay, think of your favorite neighborhood restaurant, the one that feels like home. Now, ask yourself, why that place?

If you run a restaurant, you already know it's the vibe, the flow, the way everything just works. That's where Square comes in.

Square keeps every corner of your restaurant moving, so you can focus on the reason you started it. See how Square can help your business.
Visit square.com/slash go/slash big.