How to Raise Your Vibration, Get What You Want & Live Your Best Life w/Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd Pt 3

49m
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I’m so glad you’re here for this incredible part 3 episode with Founder and CEO of Bumble, Whitney Wolfe Herd, who shares stories and insights she’s never shared before, and she’s sharing them today, right here with you! If you’re ready feel more connected and alive and get tips, tools and insights on how to raise your vibration to get what you want and truly create your best life, this episode is going to change your life today!

And whether you're joining me today for yourself or because someone that you love shared this episode with you, I want to welcome you to the Jamie Kern Lima Show podcast family. And remember this episode is not just for you and me. Please share it with every single person that you know because it can change their life too.

Whitney Wolfe Herd is the founder and CEO of Bumble, a platform for dating, friendship, business, mentoring, and connection, launched in 2014. She’s also a co-founder of Tinder and has been named to nearly every major success list—from Forbes’ Richest Self-Made Women to the Time 100. Whitney is a profoundly deep, fascinating, and brilliant woman, a wife, a mama to two beautiful boys—and my dear friend. I’m so excited for you, me, and Whitney to experience this life-changing episode together!

Episode Reflection Questions for YOU: Jamie writes prompt questions each episode to spark revelations in your self-worth journey and help you apply the tools and lessons from each episode into your real life right now. Please make sure you’re signed up for Jamie’s free inspirational newsletter jamiekernlima.com 👈

Get my new book WORTHY plus FREE Bonus gifts including a 95+ page Worthy Workbook and more at WorthyBook.com

For more resources related to today’s episode, click here https://jamiekernlima.com/show/ for the podcast episode page.

Chapters:
0:00 Welcome to The Jamie Kern Lima Show
05:15 How to Make the First Move, in Love, Friendship & Mentorship
8:45 D*ck Pics and Unsolicited Lewd Pics
13:00 Keys to Making Friends as an Adult
17:07 What People Most Get Wrong, When Looking For Love Online
19:54 Keys to Finding a Mentor & What People Get Wrong About Mentorship
22:40 “I’m not a big executive coach gal; it’s not for me.” Whitney Shares Modalities of Therapy and Healing that Work For Her
23:30 Whitneys Exact Meditation Practice and How to Do It
29:55 What Whitney is Manifesting in her Life Right Now
34:40 Whitney Reveals her Vision for the Future of Bumble “we need to learn to love, love, again.”
37:00 Self-Love and Believing You Are Enough & Why We’re Attracted to People Who Hurt Us
40:15 When You think Something is the End, It Just Might Be the Beginning!

It’s such an honor to share this podcast together with you. And please note: I am not a licensed therapist, and this podcast is NOT intended as a substitute for the advice of a physician, professional coach, psychotherapist, or other qualified professional.

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Transcript

If you're ready to feel more connected and alive and get tips, tools, and insights on how to raise your vibration and get what you want and truly create your best life, this episode is going to change your life today.

I am so glad you're here for this incredible part three episode with my dear friend and now yours too, founder and CEO of Bumble, Whitney Wolf Hurd, who shares stories and insights she's never shared before.

And she's sharing them with you today, right here.

Coming up in this episode.

What are you afraid of?

What are you afraid of?

I think when you actually look fear in the face and say, who are you?

Like, who are you, fear?

What's your name?

Why are you here?

What are you up to?

I think it will help people really understand what's holding them back.

back.

You have gone out of your way collectively to help make the online world a safer place.

So I want to talk about dick pics.

Yeah, let's talk about dick pics.

Be very classy.

This is a real online issue.

I think I just heard a gasp in the studio.

This is a real online issue.

Women were just getting spammed on the internet by these unsolicited lewd images.

If you took your clothes off in the streets, you're going to jail.

You cannot do that.

It's against the law.

But for some reason, we're letting everybody do that online and send it to teenagers.

And so we started this kind of crusade to create a law.

Wasn't there even like one senator or something that was like in trouble for it and it still passed unanimously?

Yes.

Yes.

Yes.

Yeah.

What do people most get wrong when they're looking for romantic relationships?

I think where people go wrong looking for love online is

I think what you just said is the most important thing for all of us.

I think we have fallen out of love with falling in love.

I think we've fallen out of love with ourselves.

Yes, we have.

We are totally online, but we are so offline.

We're so online.

Technically online.

So spiritually offline.

Totally offline.

Yes.

Like we are unplugged.

Yes.

While we are the most plugged in ever.

I just see the love company being a force for helping people learn to love love again.

Like, how do we love again?

Love ourselves.

Love our friends.

Like you said, you want to manifest beautiful friendships.

Like, what is a friendship rooted in love?

I believe we can only attract the kind of love that reflects the amount we love ourselves.

We only attract the kind of friends we feel worthy of.

We only attract

the level that we love ourselves.

We are all interconnected.

Yeah.

We are all so much more connected and so much more loved than we realize.

There are these secret languages of the universe that we can tap into.

When you think it's the end, it might really just be the beginning.

So never, never think something's over.

It's just the beginning of a new thing.

Thank you for having this beautiful forum for women to come together and learn and enhance and elevate.

Like you really are the embodiment of worthiness.

And I do have to give Jamie a big shout out.

For those of you that don't know Jamie personally but feel like you know her, Jamie is the kindest person I've ever met.

You are always sincerely, so genuinely kind to everyone and all around you.

deeply, deeply authentic and kind and compassionate.

And you want the best for people.

Whether you're listening for yourself or or because someone that you love shared this episode with you, I want to welcome you to the Jamie Kern Lima Show podcast family.

Remember, this episode is not just for you and me.

Please share this with every single person you know because it can change their life too.

Jamie Kern Lima is her name.

Everybody needs Jamie Kern Lima in their life.

Jamie Kern Lima.

Jamie, you're so inspiring.

Jamie Kern Lima.

Whitney Wolf Heard, welcome to the Jamie Kern Lima Show.

Thank you.

I'm so happy to be here.

When we think of Bumble and this idea of make the first move, right?

Make the first move.

You made so many first moves in your life,

in so many areas of your life, whether it's going for an idea or

putting your voice out there or

with your companies.

And,

you know, how,

what do you say to

people listening right now who are like, oh, I've never made the first move, whether it's like, to use the example of Bumble, going on and saying, I want to make a, I want to make friends as an adult, or

I think I want to find a romantic relationship, or, or I want to ask someone to be my mentor for the first time, or I'm going to go mentor someone else.

Like, how can I use all the things I've gone through to help someone else make it through those things?

Right.

So, what do you say to the person, though, who's like, oh, Whitney,

I don't even know how to make the first move or to be confident enough to do that?

I would ask the following question.

What are you afraid of?

What are you afraid of?

And what's fascinating is most people will tell you they don't know what they're afraid of.

They're just afraid of whatever they're afraid of.

And they don't know what they are afraid of.

They're just afraid.

And

I think when you actually look fear in the face and say, who are you?

Like, who are you, fear?

What's your name?

Why are you here?

What are you up to?

I think it will help people really understand what's holding them back because we should get to know the things we're afraid of.

They are there for a reason to teach us something.

And they're there for us to communicate and to say, okay, well, I'm really, I'm really afraid of getting rejected.

I'm really afraid of getting rejected.

Why?

Have a conversation with it.

Why?

Why are you afraid of getting rejected?

What's going to happen?

Well, if I get rejected, then I'm going to feel unloved the way I felt when I was a kid.

I don't know, I'm making this up.

Okay, interesting.

Well,

next step, next step, next step.

So I think it's like, instead of just going out there and me preaching to a bunch of people saying like, make the first move, just do it, just do it, just dive, dive, dive, dive.

Maybe get self,

go inward get get a bit self-reflective yeah and understand like why don't you make the first move is it because you were told culturally that you shouldn't make the first move but why yes and i think that is a really interesting moment for people in their lives yes when they say i'm stuck i can't get anything to work

I'm not gonna go move to that city.

I kind of want to move to.

Why not?

Like, I think people need to really have conversations with themselves and understand what limitations they're putting on themselves that are holding them back.

That's so good from, oh, I'm afraid of rejection or, oh, I'm, you know, afraid what people might think or, oh, my self-doubt or whatever.

And then you're saying, like, inquire about that.

Wait, well, what is this rejection?

What does that mean?

And work through it because then it probably shrinks right after.

Exactly.

So good.

And you get to know yourself better.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Because that's what this is all about.

All of us are just like on a lifelong journey of knowing ourselves, right?

And it's so funny.

I'm in the business of helping people know other people.

And I do think our next horizon is really about love in three ways.

Self-love, romantic love, and love of community and friends.

You know, with,

I want to make sure I don't miss this part because I

have.

a couple questions I'm definitely going to ask you, especially about making adult friends and about building connection and things like that.

But this, we talk about the greater good.

Um,

you have

gone out of your way collectively to to help make the online world a safer place.

So, I want to talk about dick pics.

Um, yeah, let's talk about dick pics because very classy.

This is a real online issue.

I think I just heard a gasp in the studio.

Um, this is a real, a real online issue.

And

I mean, it's, it's, it's wild in the sense of, well, first of all, I don't really understand it.

Uh, but some people just think people just want this unsolicited.

I understand the people that want them.

Okay, I get that.

But like, that's fine.

All the unsolicited ones where people just think this is a good idea

don't get that.

But it is a real thing.

And it's, you know, a thing in schools right now.

It's a thing where kids' brains aren't even developed and they don't realize some of the stuff can be permanent.

And, but anyhow, at the adult level, it's also a real issue.

And you've done a lot of work.

You've done a lot of work.

You've gotten laws passed.

You've really,

I want to commend you for everything you've done to help reduce the harassment of people getting unsolicited, unsolicited.

But that's been a passion, I think, of yours.

Well, and listen, it all stemmed from, again, we come back to intention.

Yeah.

The intention was just to create.

a kinder, safer space, right?

You created like an AI tool that can

do them, right?

Yeah.

So our team built something called called private detector It was an AI tool This was like by the way, we've been using AI for so long.

It's you know, obviously it's progressed monumentally in the last couple of years, but we built a tool that essentially

when someone sends an image to someone it essentially scans it for anything that could be you know unsolicited or or lewd So, you know, body parts, it's very sophisticated.

So with like 99% accuracy, it will give you a heads up not to open the photo and it comes blurred so that we kind of deter you from looking at whatever that is.

And what I realized was we could build all the tools in the world, but it still wasn't solving the fact that there was no consequences here.

Like, I can block and report these people, but they're going to go to another platform.

They're going to go to another app.

And I'm not here to just make bumble great.

Like, I want connecting to be healthier and safer and kinder across the board.

And so, we kept hearing in droves just negative, negative feedback about how women were just getting spammed on the internet by these unsolicited lewd images.

So I called up a local legal,

you know, someone in my network that I'm very close to, that's very close to the, the, the legal kind of state of, state of the world in Texas.

And I said, is there a law for online indecent exposure?

so indecent exposure is a law where you cannot go in the street right now on coast village road and expose yourself if you took your clothes off in the streets you're going to jail you cannot do that it's against the law but for some reason we're letting everybody do that online and send it to teenagers and

in mass like this does not feel right like how are we not

you know, everybody is online all day long.

How are we not creating more accountable spaces?

And I'm not saying I don't believe in free speech.

I'm not saying I don't believe in using your phone to navigate life the way you want.

But come on.

There's like decent behavior that we uphold people to in the real world.

And that should be mirrored on the internet.

And that's all.

And so we started this kind of crusade to create a law and we got it passed 100% unanimous yes vote in Texas.

So it became a law.

I signed it in with the governor.

And then we passed it in California.

We've passed it in several other states.

And then, you know, this year is big for a lot of policy work we're going to be putting out there into the world to create safer relationships, both on and offline.

Wasn't there even like one senator or something that was like in trouble for it?

Yeah.

And it still passed unanimously?

Yes.

Yes.

Yes.

Yeah.

I mean, are we in a simulation?

Perhaps.

Really?

Yeah.

Yeah.

Right.

Progress.

What are the best tips tips for making friends as an adult?

I would say really embracing your true passions and your quirks.

So if you're like super into making sourdough bread or like you've taken up knitting or you're like a super fanatic on mahjong or or

you've got like some obsession with reading fantasy books.

own those things.

Like those are your passions.

Those are your hobbies.

And there are other people out there that love the same things as you.

You just have to like find them.

But how can you find someone if you don't put a signal out?

Like you can't be found if you don't put a flag up or use a flashlight or like put a beacon out there.

And so I would say like shine your light bright and make a bumble for friends profile and like put your whole self out there.

Like what are you into?

What are you looking for?

Like what kind of like random buddies are you looking for to do?

Like, you know, do you want to go like to crystal shops together?

Are you obsessed with astrology?

Like just own it.

Like be authentically you and like your vibe, this is going to sound cheesy, but like it attracts your tribe.

Like it really does.

So like operate on your true frequency and like you will be met where you are, like what you said earlier.

For the person,

actually, what do people most get wrong when they're looking for romantic relationships?

I think where people go wrong looking for love online is

there's so much more coming up in this episode.

You are not going to want to miss it.

But first, I wanted to to share this with you

in life you don't soar to the level of your hopes and dreams you stay stuck at the level of your self-worth when you build your self-worth you change your entire life and that's exactly why i wrote my new book worthy how to believe you are enough and transform your life for you.

If you have some self-doubt to destroy and a destiny to fulfill, worthy is for you.

In In Worthy, you'll learn proven tools and simple steps that bring life-changing results, like how to get unstuck from the things holding you back, build unshakable self-love, unlearn the lies that lead to self-doubt and embrace the truths that wake up worthiness, overcome limiting beliefs and imposter syndrome, achieve your hopes and dreams by believing you are worthy of them and so much more.

Are you ready to unleash your greatness and step into the person you were born to be?

Imagine a life with zero self-doubt and unshakable self-worth.

Get your copy of Worthy, plus some amazing thank you bonus gifts for you at worthybook.com or the link in the show notes below.

Imagine what you'd do if you fully believed in you.

It's time to find out with Worthy.

Imagine, what would you do if you fully believed in you?

My weekly free inspirational newsletter is packed with tips and tools to help you find out.

It's called One-on-One with Jamie and it's delivered right to your inbox each Tuesday morning.

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Plus, when you're a part of my free inspirational newsletter community, you'll be the first to get behind-the-scenes content, inspirational messages, and be the first to learn about upcoming events and more.

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And here's to Becoming unstoppable together.

And now more of this incredible conversation together.

What do people most get wrong when they're looking for romantic relationships?

I think where people go wrong looking for love online is they put out a version of them they think other people want to see.

But they're so busy trying to like impress somebody else or do right for someone else that they're actually not being authentic to what they are.

So it's this like outward validation that they're seeking when in reality, they should just build a profile that is deeply authentic to who they are.

Because just like I said with friends, you never know what that special unique trait about you is.

You might call it a quirk.

You might call it a

you might consider it like your own unique weirdness, whatever someone says about themselves.

But like that is what you're looking for in a match.

You want someone that

gets you, understands you, and appreciates you.

So I think, how can you expect people to have success online if they're showing up not as themselves?

Like you have to be you to attract what's good for you.

It's so hard, I think, in this world where there's filters and there's this and there's that.

And we want to get a bunch of people that like our all the things.

And then you're just wasting your time because someone's going to, there's like a barrier of disconnection between you and the other person if it's not fully you.

So then someone's interested, but then it's not who you are, and then it's a whole just like cycle, cycle.

That's right.

But you know what I'm talking about.

And this is this predates online.

Like, did you ever get into a relationship where you felt like you needed to impress the person?

And then you get into it.

I like your movies.

Yeah.

And you're like, wait a second.

And then you're three months into it and you're like, I am miserable.

Yes.

But that's because you were, you weren't true to yourself.

Yes.

Again, intention is everything.

Intention.

Authenticity.

So full, real picture, all the things.

Love you.

No filter.

The right person will love you.

All the quirks.

And that's like...

That's it.

The right person will give you a good recipe.

That's it.

The shortcut.

As

like

predictable as it sounds and as cheesy as it sounds, like be yourself.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Be you.

It sounds that way, but no, you know, most people are not.

That's right.

Right.

So that's like, that's the big thing.

What are the keys to finding a mentor?

Oh, goodness.

I mean, you know what I think is such a great spirit of like mentorship is godmothers here in our community.

Like

what Jennifer and Victoria have built with godmothers is so beautiful.

This like this spirit of like the fairy godmother that is there to have your back.

So I think with mentors, you know, it's interesting.

I would say don't be scared to put yourself out there.

Who cares if the person doesn't respond to the email?

Email twice, email three times.

And maybe they never respond, but you know what?

You know what that mentor would have told you to do?

That.

So, like, by putting yourself out there and pushing yourself, like, you actually kind of inadvertently mentor yourself by trying to find a mentor, you know?

And I think mentorship is so important.

But I also, here's the most important thing I feel about mentors.

I think people have mentorship wrong.

I think people assume you can only learn from from someone who has achieved more than you.

My greatest mentors in my life have been the taxi cab driver that picked me up at the airport, the

person that dropped off a package.

I try to learn something from every single person I interact with.

I'm telling you, it is one of the most profound changes you'll ever have happen to you in your life.

I'm sure you do the same.

But if I could give one piece of advice to someone out there just getting started, learn from everyone because they're the real people.

They are humanity

in the works.

Now, are they going to be able to teach you how to do a P ⁇ L?

Maybe not, but that's not what life is about.

Like we should be mentored on every level.

Humanity, kindness, graciousness, respect, like that deserves mentorship as well, not just how to build a company.

So I would say reframing mentorship is really important.

Today, this is a masterclass.

Like this is, this this is, that's so profound in terms of, of what you just said.

And also, I want to, I want to highlight one thing because this was so good.

I almost jumped out of my seat.

Uh, because so often, you know, we'll go, we'll email someone, oh, you know, hoping they might mentor us or hoping there might be a connection.

And then we feel like we don't hear back and then we give up or we quit.

And what's so good about what you just said, this is so good, you guys, because then you email, even if you email again, if you email a third time and you feel like, you know, ashamed of it or whatever, it's not hearing back.

I love what Whitney just said, which is, yeah, but email them again and even again, because that's actually what they would tell you to do.

If they were mentoring,

that would be their advice.

Keep going.

And I think that's, that's so brilliant.

I want to ask you in your life, you know, you just shared a little bit about how you, you know, learned from everybody.

Right.

Because there's so many areas of our life where we can learn from and be inspired.

And

what role do mentors, but also executive coaches, therapists, all of it play in your life right now?

Because everyone's listening, wanting some of what you got.

I'm not a big executive coach gal.

Not for me.

Yeah.

No shame if someone loves it.

It's just not for me.

I am completely

on board the therapy train.

I think it's even if it's just an outlet to share your thoughts and just to have somewhere a safe space, I think it's great.

Journaling, I think, is also therapy.

My most profound like

therapist, if you will, which is not a therapist, and I'm sorry for calling you this, Bob, but

the person that taught me TM, transcendental meditation, Bob Roth, he has totally changed my life because

he just taught me how to go in.

How is that a practice you have now?

Every day.

Every day.

Yes.

Can you describe that for the person person hearing about TM or transcendental meditation, will you describe what that is and like how

right now, what part of your day is that phase?

It is probably the top five most important parts of my entire life.

Wow.

It's just 20 minutes in the morning and 20 minutes in the afternoon.

It's free.

You don't need to do anything.

You don't need your phone.

You don't need an app.

You don't need headphones.

You don't need anything.

You sit silently with your feet on the ground.

Imagine that.

You close your eyes and you repeat your mantra, which anybody can get a mantra.

It's free on the internet.

You just get a meditation teacher for free online.

And you sit silently and you essentially just calm your mind and go inward for 20 minutes.

It's like the way I would explain it is, you know, I'm also big on all sorts of fitness, like physical fitness, mental fitness, right?

That's reading, lots of reading, lots of learning.

It's spiritual fitness and it's inner fitness.

Like you have to work your insides the same way you work your outsides.

And I think you have to work in, not just only work out.

And I think that, you know,

you've got to create space, that that beautiful space to think and have clarity and just remember that whatever is going on in the day, it's okay.

Like you still can retreat to calm and to peace.

How many times a day do you meditate?

Twice.

Twice, every day.

Yeah, 20 minutes.

And do you ever miss it?

Yeah, all the time.

Yeah.

You just get back on track.

You just get back on track.

It's like someone that says they work out a lot.

Yeah.

How many days a week do you work out?

Someone will say, oh, four to five.

Well, is there ever a time where you don't work out at all?

Yeah, of course.

And then what do you do?

The next week, I go back to the gym.

You just make it part of your life.

It's part of your ritual.

It is free.

You don't need a gym.

You don't need running shoes.

You don't need sweatbands.

You don't need heart rate monitors.

You just sit there silently.

You need something to sit on.

That's it.

That's it.

Can you do it wrong?

Nope.

Nope.

Mm-mm.

This is big because a lot of people are like, I tried it and I just do it wrong.

Okay.

So this is my advice to the person that tried it and did it wrong.

You didn't do it wrong.

Just sit quietly for 20 minutes in your own thoughts.

There's no right or wrong.

It's not like you're supposed to start hearing like Elton John singing.

Like, you know, you don't like nothing happens.

You just, you hit, you know, actually a lot does happen.

So because I've been so consistent with it.

Now when I meditate, I do go somewhere different.

Like, I don't really feel my hands anymore.

I like kind kind of leave my body a little bit, which is great because you kind of go to a different part of your brain.

You kind of sink into a different like wave length.

Yeah.

Um, but if you just stay exactly where you are thinking about whatever you're thinking, just let the thoughts carry on.

It's like clouds in the sky, clouds in the sky.

You just let them pass and just sit there.

Give yourself space.

Do you find when you're in Hawaii or you're in Aspen, does your meditations shift at all?

Are they different or you're just, you're in and you transcend what, what's around you?

I don't think it matters where you are.

Yeah.

I think you just go to your inner

place.

Yeah.

And that's it.

This is so.

Okay.

Can I just tell you this is so freaking great?

Is it?

I don't know.

Oh my gosh.

No, I don't know what we're talking about.

It is

already.

Okay.

I just have a few more questions.

I don't want to take up time saying this.

I'll text you all about this later.

Okay.

What are three things you're manifesting right now?

Hmm.

I am manifesting.

There is so much more coming up in this episode.

You are not gonna wanna miss it.

But first, I wanted to share this with you.

In life, you don't soar to the level of your hopes and dreams.

You stay stuck at the level of your self-worth.

When you build your self-worth, you change your entire life.

And that's exactly why I wrote my new book, Worthy, How to Believe You Are Enough and Transform Your Life for You.

If you have some self-doubt to destroy and a destiny to fulfill, Worthy is for you.

In Worthy, you'll learn proven tools and simple steps that bring life-changing results, like how to get unstuck from the things holding you back, build unshakable self-love.

Unlearn the lies that lead to self-doubt and embrace the truths that wake up worthiness.

Overcome limiting beliefs and imposter syndrome.

Achieve your hopes and dreams by believing you are worthy of them and so much more.

Are you ready to unleash your greatness and step into the person you were born to be?

Imagine a life with zero self-doubt and unshakable self-worth.

Get your copy of Worthy, plus some amazing thank you bonus gifts for you at worthybook.com or the link in the show notes below.

Imagine what you'd do if you fully believed in you.

It's time to find out with worthy.

Imagine, what would you do if you fully believed in you.

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And here's to becoming unstoppable together.

And now more of this incredible conversation together.

What are three things you're manifesting right now?

I am manifesting

the love company, which is bumble, but it's the next iteration of it.

I am manifesting

inner peace, like inner, inner equanimity, just feeling at peace with whatever happens.

And I don't mean like, oh, everything is great.

Bad things are going to happen.

All of us are going to have rough patches.

Our kids are going to get boo-boos and, you know, pipes are going to break.

Whatever is going to happen.

But I really want to manifest just making sure that my attitude is everything and carrying that that through with the team at Bumble and being like a steady, a steady, you know, a steady captain.

And then the other thing I'm manifesting is, hmm, what else am I manifesting?

I'll think about that.

I'll tell you at the end.

What are you manifesting?

I need to know what you're manifesting.

I am manifesting another baby.

I love that.

I am manifesting really, really, really great friendships.

I love that.

And I am manifesting,

I'm manifesting not getting distracted

by

what I can do.

That's like a big shiny star rocket ship taking off.

And I'm doing, Oprah said this best, Whitney, and it's just been this thing in my life.

I feel like 2025

all year, this is what I'm gonna be saying over and over.

Because my whole life, I've told God what my dream is.

Like, okay, now I want this.

I'm gonna make a cosmetics the biggest makeup company in the country.

And then I'm gonna change this many lives.

I'm gonna donate this much money.

Like, I was always telling him what dream, like what my dream is.

And I'll never forget on the show, she says, the key is not telling God what you want to necessarily manifest or make happen, but the key is asking God, what is the dream you have for me?

Right?

What is the dream you have for me?

And another way of saying that is like, what was I created for?

What am I here to do?

And so I feel like in 2025, I'm manifesting, turning down the volume on the parts of me that want to build more rocket ships because they'll help this many people and they'll do that.

And all of a sudden, all my time is taken up.

And also I'm burnt out, which is like my pattern.

And I want to just figure out like.

how to get still, how to create space, how to ask God, what is the dream you have for me?

And trying to have enough space to actually hear the answer and then live the answer.

That's beautiful.

So, that's so beautiful.

That's exciting this year.

I'll tell you one crazy story as it pertains to that, because I think what you just said is the most important thing for all of us.

I promise, this is so wild, but

a couple days before I was faced with the concept of going back in as CEO,

I woke up after my meditation.

I was outside in nature and I literally looked to the sky and I said,

in 2025, universe, God, whatever you want to call it, right?

Source,

use me for love and light.

Use me for my highest good.

I'm here to serve.

Like

you tell me what I'm here to do because I'm available.

Like I'm for hire, whatever it is.

Not for a job, but you know what I mean?

Like I want to be used for love and light as a vessel, as a vehicle.

And I literally looked up and I was like, please use me this year.

Like, tell me what to do.

Just use me for love and light.

That's all I ask.

And then just a couple of days later, this

situation where I was faced with, do I go back?

Do I not go back?

Unfolded.

And it's, oh,

interesting.

And I just immediately knew the answer

intuitively.

I didn't think I, I didn't think that was my answer.

I mean, two days prior, I wasn't thinking, oh, maybe I'll be the CEO again.

That wasn't on my mind.

Yeah.

But that's that whole notion of don't tell the universe what you want necessarily.

You can, you can set a direction and a tone.

And of course, it's great to have dreams and visions, but it's also nice to throw the ball back and say, like, okay,

I've had plenty of manifesting and I've achieved all sorts of things that I wanted to achieve.

I think there's a higher purpose here.

You tell me now.

Use me.

Let me be of service.

So I think what Oprah said is profound, and I love that that's the way you're living your 2025 out.

You sing use me for love and light.

And now you're calling Bumble the Love Company

and manifesting its next iteration.

What do you imagine that looks like?

I think we have fallen out of love with falling in love.

I think we've fallen out of love with ourselves.

Yes, we have.

We are totally online, but we are so offline.

We're so online.

Technically online.

So spiritually offline.

Totally offline.

Yes.

Like we are unplugged.

Yes.

While we are the most plugged in ever.

It's this crazy, crazy, you know.

comparison of two forces, right?

And

I just see the love company being a force for helping people learn to love love again.

Like, how do we love again?

Love ourselves,

love our friends.

Like you said, you want to manifest beautiful friendships.

Like, what is a friendship rooted in love?

Not in,

you know, oh, well, this, you know, this friend makes sense to me because the kids are the same age or whatever.

Like, those are all wonderful things.

But what is a love-based relationship?

And then what is the relationship we have with ourselves?

Because I don't know how I'm supposed to put millions and millions of people online via a profile as hurt people looking to hurt other people.

Hurt people hurting people is not the solution here.

Yeah.

Yeah.

So I think that's my, that's my duty.

Like I've got to go.

figure out how to do some version of this.

And I don't have all the answers, but I've got the compass and the direction.

And I feel like I'm marching in the right direction.

Whitney, this is so huge.

Why I've been so obsessed for years of studying self-worth because I always got it wrong.

I always did all the things to build confidence, but deep down inside, I didn't think I was enough and actually love myself innately.

And when I wrote worthy, and when 260,000 women showed up live on it for the launch event, all the things.

You look at the data, 80% of women don't believe they're enough.

Like right now, as we're sitting here.

And I

am so excited about what you just shared because I feel like the need for it, right?

Because you can have millions and millions and millions of people.

And yes, of course, celebrating romantic relationships and connections and all the things, but also the, I think the biggest

wide open space is us also actually learning to feel worthy of ourselves, learning to love ourselves.

Self-love, not in the narcissistic sense, as you shared earlier, as you were talking about earlier, but like actually believing we're enough.

Cause we, I believe we can only attract the kind of love that reflects the amount we love ourselves, right?

For me, most of my life, I was attracted to dudes I knew.

I was like, oh, they're a bad boy.

I'm gonna try to, they're just gonna hurt me, but that felt familiar.

You're like, oh, I deserve it, though.

I deserve it.

That's, that's

what I need.

That's what I, that was what was for me.

I don't deserve the nice guy.

Yeah.

Yeah.

And so the thing I'm so excited about is like imagining whatever the, all of the offerings Bumble, the love company is going to have, but just helping

helping heal humanity through love and also through learning to love themselves and to build self-worth.

That's huge because we only attract the kind of friends we feel worthy of.

We only attract, you know, reflect the level that we love ourselves.

And that's so exciting.

Okay.

Three rapid fire questions and we're done.

Okay.

What is your favorite book of all time?

Oh, goodness.

I I actually honestly genuinely would put worthy up there.

It's really important.

It's really important.

And when I think about my favorite books, you know what?

It's a hard question to answer.

So I'll answer it in a different way.

What's the book I've gifted the most?

I'll answer that.

I have gifted the book signs the most.

I think I've gifted the book signs to hundreds of people.

Yeah.

Because what it has taught me.

is that

we are all interconnected.

Yeah.

We are all so much more connected and so much more loved than we realize.

And what meets the eye is not always like the full picture.

And there are these, to use her literal tagline on the front of the book, there are these secret languages of the universe that we can tap into.

And the reason why I love the book signs is life's hard.

Yeah.

Building businesses is not for the faint of heart.

Motherhood is not for the faint of heart.

Nothing.

worth doing in life is easy.

And you've got to believe in something bigger, right?

You've You've got to feel like the universe has your back.

And so, I would say, like, that's a book I've gifted a lot.

And then, one other that I would say has been really transformational as it pertains to business has been unreasonable hospitality.

I could never really put my philosophy of how to treat people like onto paper because I always feel like I walked in here today and I said, That's my favorite song.

And you said, I know that's unreasonable hospitality, unreasonable thoughtfulness, unreasonable kindness.

Like

the quote is more true than anything I've ever heard.

It's like people will truly forget what you said and what you did, but they'll never forget how you made them feel.

And what more beautiful thing in life than to just leave someone feeling better than you left them?

You are leaving so many people feeling better than when they started this out.

God, I hope so.

You should.

Or they're terrified.

What is your greatest life lesson learned so far?

When you think it's the end, it might really just be the beginning.

So never, never think something's over.

It's just the beginning of a new thing.

I think that is really the best lesson.

It's like

you, if you zoom out,

you're looking at this, right?

You're looking at this one little thing and you're like, oh gosh, just zoom out.

Like, zoom out.

It's the best lesson.

And you'll understand perspective is everything.

Someone needs to hear that today.

I know that for sure.

Whitney, thank you so much.

Thank you, Jamie.

I love you.

I'm grateful you're here.

I love you.

You bless so many people today.

Thank you for your friendship.

Thank you for your leadership.

Thank you for your championship of women and of connection.

And I am so excited to see everything that is to come with Bumble the Love Company.

Let's excited.

You're the best, Jamie.

Thank you for having this beautiful forum for women to come together and learn and enhance and elevate.

Like you really are the embodiment of worthiness and amazing energy.

And I'm just grateful to have you as a friend and as like

a champion of all good things in the world.

And I do have to give Jamie a big shout out.

For those of you that don't know Jamie personally, but feel like you know her, Jamie is the kindest person I've ever met.

You are always sincerely, so genuinely kind to everyone and all around you, deeply, deeply authentic and kind and compassionate.

And you want the best for people.

And I think that is a beautiful thing.

That is, that is probably the best life advice.

It's just want the best for everyone around you.

And you do that.

You are not a jealous person.

You genuinely, you genuinely want to uplift others.

And that is a beautiful thing.

And it's given you all the success that you deserve.

Yes, because like you, meeting the vibration, right?

Meet the vibration.

Thank you.

Thank you.

Remember, this episode is not just for you and me.

Please share this with every single person you know because it can change their life too.

If you love today's episode, my only ask is you please click on the follow or subscribe button for the show on your app, give it a five-star rating or review, and then share this episode with everyone you believe in.

Share it with another person in your life who could benefit from it.

Post it and share it with others online or in your community who just might need the words and tools and lessons and inspiration in this episode today.

You never know whose life you're meant to change today by sharing this episode.

And thank you so much for joining me today.

Before you go, I want to share some words with you that couldn't be more true.

You, right now, exactly as you are, are enough and fully worthy.

You're worthy of your greatest hopes, your wildest dreams, and all the unconditional love in the world.

And it is an honor to welcome you to each and every episode of the Jamie Kern-Lima Show.

Here, I hope you'll come as you are, heal where you need, blossom what you choose.

Journey toward your calling and stay as long as you'd like because you belong here.

You are worthy.

You are loved.

You are love.

I love you.

And I cannot wait to join you on the next episode of the Jamie Kernlema Show.

Do you struggle with negative self-talk?

Living with a constant mental narrative that you're not good enough is exhausting.

I know because I spent most of my life in that habit.

The words you say to yourself about yourself are so powerful.

And when you learn to take control over your self-talk, it's life-changing.

And I wanted to give you a free resource that I created for you if this is something that could benefit your life.

It's called five ways to overcome negative self-talk and build self-love.

And it's a free how-to guide to overcome that negative self-talk to build confidence and develop unshakable self-love so that you can dream big and keep going in the pursuit of your goals.

Don't let self-sabotaging thoughts hinder your progress any longer.

It's time to rewrite the script of your life, one filled with self-love, resilience, and unwavering belief.

If you're ready to take charge of your narrative, build unwavering confidence, and empower yourself to persevere on the path to your dreams, you can grab your free guide to stop overthinking and learn to trust yourself at jamiekernlema.com/slash resources or click the link in the show notes below.

Who you spend time around is so important as energy is contagious and so is self-belief.

And I'd love to hang out with you even more, especially if you could use an extra dose of inspiration, which is exactly why I've created my free weekly newsletter that's also a love letter to you delivered straight to your inbox from me.

If you haven't signed up to make sure that you get it each week, just go to jamiecarnlima.com to make sure you're on the list and you'll get your one-on-one with Jamie weekly newsletter and get ready to believe in you.

If you're tired of hearing the bad news every single day and need some inspiration, some tips, tools, joy, and love, hitting your inbox, I'm your girl.

Subscribe at jamiekernlema.com or in the link in the show notes.

I am so excited for this book.

You know why?

Because it's going to save so many

people.

It's going to be so cool.

Were the your new beautiful book worthy get this book?

This book, I'm telling you, it's a book that can change anybody's life who picks it up.

Anyone who's ever felt that they were not good enough, didn't measure up, something's missing in your life.

I have to tell you.

It's powerful.

It's happening.

It's worth it.

Imagine what would you do if you fully believed in you.

I went from struggling waitress facing non-stop rejection to founder of It Cosmetics, a billion-dollar company by learning how to overcome self-doubt and believe I'm worthy of my hopes and dreams.

And I'm sharing how you can too in my new book, Worthy, how to believe you are enough and transform your life.

If you're ready to truly trust yourself and break through that barrier of self-doubt and know that where you come from or even where you are right now doesn't determine where you're going, then worthy is for you.

It's time to go from doubting you're enough to knowing you're enough.

It's time to step into all of who you are and into the person you were born to be.

And it's time to believe that you are worthy of it.

Because in life, we don't become what we want.

We become what we believe we're worthy of.

Join the worthy movement today by grabbing your copy of Worthy anywhere books are sold.

Then head to worthybook.com now for free gifts, including my five-part course on becoming unstoppable and my 95-page Worthy Workbook action plan that teaches you how to implement the tools from the book into your real life right now.

Worthy is groundbreaking.

Yo, my God!

Worthy, you are worthy.

This book is going to change lives.

This book literally will teach you how to actually feel worthy so that you can have the strength, you can have the confidence.

The lessons in this book and the strategies will change your life.

You will never be the same again after you read this book.

Jamie's Book Worthy is a must-read.

It is going to inspire you, empower you, give you the hope that you need and the kick in the rear end that you deserve.

Jamie's Book Worthy is incredible.

The gifts are going away, but they're all free right now on worthybook.com.

It's such an honor to share this podcast together with you.

And please note, I'm not a licensed therapist and this podcast is not intended as a substitute for the advice of a physician, professional coach, psychotherapist, or other qualified professional.