How CEO Leila Hormozi Went From Broke, Anxious & Arrested 6 Times To $100M Net Worth
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Speaker 1 There are two big things happening at one time that I've never done before. I'm going on a book tour for my new book, Make Money Easy, and I'm doing a podcast tour at the same time.
Speaker 1
It is going to be big, and I'm going to seven cities in 10 days. Get your friends, get your family, bring everyone you know to these cities.
I'm coming to Austin, Texas, New York, Boston.
Speaker 1
We're going to Nashville, then we're going to Los Angeles, San Diego, and San Francisco. Make sure to get your tickets right now.
Go to lewishowes.com/slash tour.
Speaker 1 Again, bring everyone you know if you're looking to create more financial freedom and abundance in your life and you want to see a massive guest live on the School of Greatness show. Get your tickets.
Speaker 1 I can't wait to see you there.
Speaker 1
Welcome back, my friend. I have got a special guest today.
Layla Hormozi is in the house. Most people know of Alex Hormozi.
We've had him on here a few different times and he has blown up our content.
Speaker 1
People love it. People can't stop watching and listening to it and they're sharing it all over the place.
But I said, you know what?
Speaker 1 I want to hear what the real brains behind that business is all about. And I'm half joking here, but Layla Hermose,
Speaker 1
Alex's wife, he will say she is the brains. She's the one operating the business.
She's coordinating, hiring, getting great talent, all these different things.
Speaker 1 She is the one that's kind of keeping it all together while Alex is the face and he's creating content and he's doing lead gen and marketing, but she's creating the operations and she's running the business in a big way.
Speaker 1 And what makes this conversation special is Layla's vulnerable exploration of her mental and emotional skills that drive true success far beyond just business tactics.
Speaker 1 I've seen other content of her that's kind of talking right into analytics, right into tactics, right into here the steps.
Speaker 1 But what you're going to hear today is probably something you'll never hear from any of other of her content
Speaker 1 unless she starts talking about it again, because she got very open, very vulnerable, and very raw in a way that I've never seen her emotionally.
Speaker 1 And
Speaker 1 it shocked me a little bit because there is so much about her when you peel back the layers.
Speaker 1 about her that makes her unique from her past, from her story, and all the challenges that she faced, where she had to overcome so much to develop certain skills that are essential for business today.
Speaker 1 And if you've gone through any challenges in your life, you have developed certain skills as well, whether you're aware of it or not.
Speaker 1 And hopefully, this interview with Layla will support you in figuring out just what those skills are because you are unique and talented.
Speaker 1 And maybe you just haven't uncovered or peeled back the layers yet on what those skills and talents are to create the abundance in your life.
Speaker 1
And speaking of abundance, I have a brand new book coming out called Make Money Easy. And it's all about creating financial freedom and living a richer life.
Most people are not living in abundance.
Speaker 1 They don't feel like they have a rich life externally, and they don't have a rich life or inner peace internally.
Speaker 1 And this book is all about giving you the exact steps in the entire framework for creating your path to peace, freedom, and a financial abundance. And it starts with the inner work.
Speaker 1 It starts with understanding your money story, your money wounds, and your money style.
Speaker 1 Once you're aware of those, and we talk about how to get that clarity on what those are for you through certain assessments in the book, then we talk about the seven habits, the seven money mindset habits to unlock abundance in your life.
Speaker 1 We break those down on all the lessons, the exercises, and the examples you need to unlock the blocks of abundance for you. Again, you can go to makemoneyeasybook.com.
Speaker 1
You can pre-order your copy there. And I'm also going on tour.
That's right.
Speaker 1 In just a couple of weeks, I'm going to be in Austin, Texas, New York City, Boston, Massachusetts, Nashville, Los Angeles, San Francisco, and San Diego.
Speaker 1 So if you go to makemoneyeasybook.com, or you just go to the description of this podcast at the top there, you'll see a link to go pre-order the book right now and to get your ticket to come see me live.
Speaker 1
And we're doing a live special guest in every city as well for a podcast tour at the same time. So we're doing a book tour and a podcast tour at the same time.
You're getting a two for one, baby.
Speaker 1
Let's go. I'm super excited about this, and I hope to see you there.
If you're coming, bring your friends, bring your family. It's going to be a fun evening in one of those cities.
Speaker 1 But I am excited for what you're about to experience right now. Again, a side of Leila Hormozi that I've never seen before that I'm not sure if you'll ever experience again.
Speaker 1 So make sure to pay attention, take notes, share this with one or two friends that you think will be inspired by this as well. And let's dive in with the one and only Leila Hormozi.
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Speaker 1
Welcome back, everyone, to the School of Greatness. Very excited about our guests.
We have the inspiring, incredible business leader, Leila Hor Mosey. Good to see you.
Speaker 2 Nice for being here.
Speaker 1 Thank you.
Speaker 1
We met a few years ago. Yeah.
And you and your husband, Alex, just sold a company, and you were looking to to launch acquisitions.com. Yeah.
Speaker 1 What's the thing that you have now that your 20-year-old self didn't have?
Speaker 2 Emotional regulation.
Speaker 1 You didn't have that when you were 20 in your 20s, teens?
Speaker 1 No.
Speaker 1 What did it look like back then? Because didn't I read you like went to jail a bunch of times and like had a really chaotic
Speaker 2 upbringing?
Speaker 2 I graduated high school and I went to college and I think it was,
Speaker 2
you know, if we run back further, my parents had gotten divorced. I'd lived with my mom.
She got into drugs and alcohol.
Speaker 2 Ended up being like a very bad environment for a kid. And so, you know, when I was 15, she tried to kill herself in front of me.
Speaker 2
I kind of just like shut down after that moment until I was 19. Like I just went numb.
I remember actually,
Speaker 2 because I'd been this constant state of anxiety, like perpetual, like always heightened anxiety in my body. I'd lost like 20% of my body weight or something, I remember.
Speaker 2 Like it was just like very, very stressed all the time.
Speaker 1 Was this before she attempted
Speaker 2 to kill herself? Constantly just stressed because she was thinking, she'd be gone for a week at a time.
Speaker 2 I wouldn't know where she was, but I didn't want to tell anybody because I didn't want anyone to like call, you know, whatever that
Speaker 2 child services or whatever.
Speaker 1 This is when you're like 13 through 15.
Speaker 2 Nine to 15. Wow.
Speaker 1 She'd be gone for a week at a time. Yeah.
Speaker 2 And so.
Speaker 1 Your parents were divorced before then?
Speaker 2
They got divorced. They separated when I I was nine.
Gotcha. And so then.
Speaker 1 So you were with your mom alone most of the time then. Correct.
Speaker 2 Yeah.
Speaker 2
And she'd been a great mom before that. But when that happened, I just completely shut down.
And the way that I was able to do anything was just, I was numb. It was like, I wasn't angry.
Speaker 2
I also wasn't happy. I was just like this.
Flat. Flat.
Speaker 2 Until I was 19. I got out of the house.
Speaker 2 And then I was just mad.
Speaker 2
And I didn't know how to deal with that anger. So I started drinking.
And then I started doing drugs. And then I, and it turned into this whole cycle.
Speaker 2 And then I started getting arrested because I was blacking out and I was doing drugs. And I don't even know what I did half the time.
Speaker 2
And that's what got me to get arrested six times in 18 months. Wow.
I know. It was just like.
Speaker 1 Six times. Six times.
Speaker 2 Yeah, you would think the fourth.
Speaker 2 Second, and first. Yeah, I mean, it was not enough.
Speaker 1 Wow. What is that like getting arrested six times?
Speaker 2 Humiliating. Really? Yeah.
Speaker 2 Like I was very ashamed, but I didn't know how to stop.
Speaker 2 Wow.
Speaker 1
Yeah, I don't know. I mean, I've never been arrested.
I hope it never happens because I just don't know
Speaker 1 what state you need to be in to keep getting arrested. So I can only assume that you were in a
Speaker 1 very
Speaker 1 low state at that time.
Speaker 2 When you feel like crap all the time.
Speaker 2
You just feel like crap again when you get arrested. It's not very different.
Okay. You know what I mean?
Speaker 2 So
Speaker 2 if now I were to get arrested, it would feel awful because it's such a contrast. But I think...
Speaker 1 But you're like, well, this is my life anyways, so whatever.
Speaker 2 My life sucks, so what does it matter? Wow. Yeah.
Speaker 2 So
Speaker 2 during that time, what I recognized after some time is that I was at odds with my emotions. And I think what it was is that
Speaker 2 I tried so hard to never feel the way I had felt when I had been in that house with with my mother that first I disconnected from my emotions. And then in my young 20s, I was at odds with them.
Speaker 2
Meaning I would fight anxiety, I would fight depression, I would fight sadness, I would fight frustration. Like I didn't want it, I wanted to get rid of it.
And it wasn't until I was probably
Speaker 2 just in the last six, seven years that I was like,
Speaker 2 I can take them with me. They're not bad.
Speaker 2 And I started engaging with them in a healthy way. Really? And just changing my relationship with them rather than trying to stuff them down, suppress them,
Speaker 2 get rid of them.
Speaker 1 Yeah, exactly. So, what would it look like, you know,
Speaker 1 if you're feeling anxious now versus anxious back then?
Speaker 1 How does that look? Are you having a conversation with yourself? Are you talking to the anxiety part of you? Are you...
Speaker 1 Did you used to shame yourself when that happened? Like, what are you doing now versus then that allows you to feel more
Speaker 1 joyful and peaceful versus stressful and crappy.
Speaker 2 Well, it's actually funny because I think that when I was 19, I would feel an emotion and then I would drink or I would do drugs. Then it turned into I would work out, I would study, I would work.
Speaker 2 And so I just replaced it, which, I mean, hey, it was more like something a little more productive, but yeah, yeah.
Speaker 1 Yeah. You still weren't addressing it, though.
Speaker 2
I wasn't addressing it. And so it's still, I still felt very anxious all the time.
I still felt very stressed. And so
Speaker 2 now,
Speaker 2 rather than the moment that I feel stressed or I feel anxious, I go into action. I go into,
Speaker 2
I say, this is my mental accuse, absorption, absorption, which is like I absorb the emotion. I'm like, let it fill me up.
Let me feel it.
Speaker 2 Now I don't need to indulge in it. I don't need to ruminate, but I can take five minutes to feel what I'm feeling.
Speaker 2 And it's not because I need, I believe that I need to do some kind of mental rumination to get over an emotion.
Speaker 2 It's because I want to teach my body that it's nothing to be afraid of and that's nothing to run from.
Speaker 2 And that's helped me so much because I say, okay, I'm going to give myself five minutes and then I'm going to go on with what my day was going to be.
Speaker 2 I'm not going to let the emotion derail me from my day because I know at the end of the day, at the end of the day, that day helps me achieve my goals if I keep, if I follow the plan.
Speaker 2 And so that has been the biggest change that I've made in the last decade has just been my relationship with bad negative emotions.
Speaker 1
That's interesting because it sounds like first when you'd feel a negative emotion you would react to it with a negative response. Yeah.
Drugs, alcohol, whatever, numbing, some numbing mechanism.
Speaker 1 Yeah.
Speaker 1 Then
Speaker 2 you
Speaker 1 said, okay, this doesn't feel good anymore and I'm getting bad results by doing this. So let me try to do something productive when I feel stressed.
Speaker 1
So you reacted with working harder, working out, trying to eat better, whatever it might be. But you still felt the stress and anxiety.
Totally.
Speaker 1 But at least there was a better result, but not better external result, but not internal result.
Speaker 1 Now you face it and you feel it and kind of reflect in the moment, give yourself a pause, and then you get back into something productive.
Speaker 2 100%.
Speaker 2 And it's funny because the outcome,
Speaker 2 like when we built
Speaker 2 Gym Launch, first business that we ever had, I think a lot of that was still fueled off of this
Speaker 2 frenetic energy of like trying to run.
Speaker 1 Anxious, stressful.
Speaker 2 Right, but it created something really cool. But it was, I remember the moment where it was like two years before we sold that started to shift where I started recognizing that relationship.
Speaker 2 And then I said, I want to be able to do this in a way that makes me better, not worse.
Speaker 2
I don't want work to make me worse as a person. I don't want work to make me emotionally worse, to make me spiritually worse, to make me a worse wife.
I want work to make me better.
Speaker 2 And so the only way I can do that is if every time I have a negative emotion, I look at it as an opportunity.
Speaker 2 to make a better relationship with my emotions, which will, that will transfer to all areas of my life, my relationship, my friendships, et cetera.
Speaker 2 And so now it's like I look at business as the biggest vehicle for my personal growth because I'm constantly facing these negative emotions.
Speaker 2 And so I get all that practice to confront them and then say, hey, I don't need to run from any of this. And that means that my life gets to expand rather than contract every time I do that.
Speaker 1 Was there a moment in your life like where someone taught you this or you had someone confront you or coach you or mentor you that said, hey, I see you doing these things.
Speaker 1 it's not helping here's another approach or was this just an internal reflection yeah it's actually um
Speaker 2 so about a year and a half before we sold um gym launch our first business uh i
Speaker 2 it was like there was a week where i had to run our team quarterly i then had a full team event i had a speaking gig I was doing and then I had some other event.
Speaker 2 And I was lying in bed and I remember I just felt so much anxiety and all of a sudden this like wave came over me and I had a full-blown panic attack and then I was up all night I couldn't sleep I was like what's wrong with me I haven't had a panic attack in a decade and and it wasn't like how you know when I was younger I would get panic attacks at times it was like you know my tongue is swollen my hands go numb like full-on like many more symptoms than I experienced in the past it freaked me out and when that happened, I was like,
Speaker 2 you know, the first thing that happened was like, what's wrong with me? Like, there's got to be something wrong with me because I don't understand.
Speaker 2 And then after about two and a half weeks of, you know, I reached out to different therapists and psychiatrists and doctors and like everyone has their own opinion of, you know, why did you have this panic attack?
Speaker 2 I reached out to a friend of mine who recommended I read a book. And the book was Control Your Anxiety Before It Controls You by Albert Ellis.
Speaker 2 And I read that book and I was like, oh my god,
Speaker 2 I don't need anybody to tell me what's wrong with me because nothing's wrong with me besides the fact that I think these things are so bad.
Speaker 1 And the things in your life are bad or certain.
Speaker 2 The emotions that I was feeling.
Speaker 2 You thought that they were bad. The fact that I was so anxious about something, the fact that like there's nothing wrong with me for having a panic attack.
Speaker 2
There's nothing wrong if you can't sleep at night because you're anxious. There's nothing wrong.
But I was labeling all those things as bad and wrong and saying I needed to make them go away.
Speaker 1
You know, something's wrong with me. I shouldn't have these feelings or these emotions.
Yes.
Speaker 2 Because sometimes emotions are so strong, we feel like there's something physically wrong with us. And so
Speaker 2 I then said, I need to learn all this for myself. And so I started studying a lot of Albert Ellis and Stephen Hayes, their work just as behavioral psychologists.
Speaker 2 And I think I've read every book from each one of them.
Speaker 2 And it's really helped me learn that there's never been anything wrong with me.
Speaker 2
It's just been my response to my negative emotions that has been, I've just had a bad relationship with them most of my life. And so I had to change that.
And that was when I decided because I said,
Speaker 2 how am I going to be able to achieve my goals if, you know, my goals do have me doing a speaking event, running a full team. Like, I want to be that person, but it freaks me the f ⁇ out.
Speaker 2 And so I had a panic attack.
Speaker 2 But I want to achieve those goals. And so that...
Speaker 2 That was really the,
Speaker 2 I would say like the driver behind my motivation to figure that out for myself. And ever since then, it's been a constant practice of recognizing what I'm feeling,
Speaker 2 remembering that emotions cannot hurt me, right? It's like a lot of people say, like, oh, well, you're not going to die. I'm like, I don't think most people are scared of dying.
Speaker 2
I think they're scared of feeling like they're going to die. You know what I'm saying? Like, we're not scared of death.
We're scared of feeling like we're going to confront death.
Speaker 2 And so
Speaker 2 that was really significant for me. And it also, I would say, propelled me in the direction of learning to be more flexible and less rigid because also,
Speaker 2 you know, that control, it also wants to control emotions. Like me, my control in a business setting can be very helpful at times.
Speaker 2 Control when it comes to an emotional part of my life is not helpful because I can't control every thought and feeling that comes into my mind or my brain.
Speaker 2 And so that really taught me that being able to let go, being able to let things occur and just remind myself that I am big enough to hold space for all of those things and feeling them is not going to do anything.
Speaker 2 That really was probably the time in my life when I realized that. It was because
Speaker 2
lying there at night having a panic attack over those things, being like, I'm worth multiple hundreds of millions of dollars. I've built all these things.
I have all this team underneath me.
Speaker 2 Like, why am I having a panic attack right now?
Speaker 1 Why is it, though, that some extremely successful business leaders or wealthy individuals have a lot of anxiety that they can't get rid of
Speaker 2 well I think that the more that you run from something, the bigger it becomes, right? Like there's this quote that I love, which is, fear is a mile wide and an inch deep.
Speaker 2 And so, like, the moment that you step into that puddle or into what you think is an ocean, you recognize it's a puddle.
Speaker 2 And I think that most of the time, a lot of people I meet, because I talk to thousands of entrepreneurs each month,
Speaker 2 they're running from something. But that thing, I think that they always think,
Speaker 2 I'll tell you this. So, before I met Alex, I had a boyfriend.
Speaker 2 Don't tell him. Oh, my God.
Speaker 2
And we broke up. And then after that breakup, I was really sad.
And so I saw a therapist at the time. And I said, you know, it'd been like two and a half months.
And I was like, I'm just really sad.
Speaker 2 And she's like, well, why are you so sad? I was like, well, you know, I did hear that it takes about half the time that you've been with someone to get over someone.
Speaker 2 And she was like, I think that's stupid. And I was like, What's this therapist saying that's stupid? And I was like, okay, well,
Speaker 2 what then? And she's like, I I think it takes as long as you want it to take.
Speaker 2 I was like, okay, so what do you suggest? She's like, how about Thursday?
Speaker 2 What?
Speaker 2 Yeah. And she was like, how about you're over Thursday?
Speaker 2 And I was like, okay. She's like, well, what would somebody who's over it do?
Speaker 2
Okay, well, I would probably start going on dates. I would probably fill my time with other things.
I probably wouldn't think about it so much. I would probably do all these things to enjoy my life.
Speaker 2 And so I started doing those things. And what I recognized is that the moment I started acting like I was over it, I was over it.
Speaker 2 And I think I relate that back because I think so many things that we fear or so many things we think are these big
Speaker 2 things that we have to confront in life, they actually only take a very small period of time. But we make it out to be like this big thing because we've been running from it for so long.
Speaker 2 And so for me, I've just noticed time and time again,
Speaker 2 most of the things that I've had to confront, I might have been scared of for years. And I can get over it in a matter of hours.
Speaker 2 And I think it's the same for so many people, but it's the fear is so
Speaker 2
persuasive. Like it persuades you into thinking that it's going to take so long to get over it.
But the reality is it doesn't.
Speaker 2 It's almost like you have to skip through the puddle versus you think you have to swim across this entire ocean.
Speaker 2 And so I think that most people just maybe they don't have the information or maybe they don't take the time because they're so busy in the business to step out and say what are these things that are constraining me from growing my business even bigger.
Speaker 2 Because for me, I look at it and I'm like, if there's anything taking my attention
Speaker 2 even if it's not business related i need to handle it so whatever takes the most amount of mind share for me face it yeah i need to face that no matter what it has to do with it could have to do with my family friends whatever and so though that doesn't have to do with business that's also how i've known how to grow my business is i have to constantly clear i say it like i'm clearing almost like whatever that means i'm not like a woo-woo or a spiritual person but clearing the energy i'm clearing yeah way for bigger and better things so i can expand my life.
Speaker 2 And I look at it like if I have my attention as a jar of marbles and I have 100 marbles, but I have 25 of them stuck on this thing I'm scared of.
Speaker 2 And every day I think about it, I would like to take those back.
Speaker 2 And so I need to go confront the thing that I'm scared of in order to get those marbles back and have my full attention to do the things that I actually want to do and actually enjoy doing. Yeah.
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Speaker 1 When was the time when you started to make like some serious money? How old were you when you started to like make because there was I know you guys had no money at one point. Yeah.
Speaker 1 I think you might have slept in like your guys' car or something. I was like, didn't you guys sleep in a car for a bit?
Speaker 2 So we slept at a client's house and then we stayed at my parents' house. Okay, cool.
Speaker 1
Maybe he slept in his car at one point. I can't remember if he said that, but we had a sh ⁇ for sure.
Okay, anyways. But there's a point in your life where you weren't making any money.
Yeah. Right.
Speaker 1 And then there was a point in your life where you started to make some money and then a lot more money.
Speaker 2 Yeah.
Speaker 1 Did you always feel like you were worthy and deserving of making money? No.
Speaker 1 When did that start to change that you felt like I'm worthy of making money?
Speaker 2 I don't think I'm worthy of making money. Still? No.
Speaker 1 You don't think you're worthy?
Speaker 2 I don't think anybody has to be worthy to make money.
Speaker 1 Do you feel like you're deserving of making the money that you have? Or the money that you have now, you're worthy of having it?
Speaker 2 I am a
Speaker 2 capable steward of the money.
Speaker 1 I think that's worthy then.
Speaker 2 Yeah, I guess I just don't use that word very much.
Speaker 2 I think that what I used to think is I had to be this amazing.
Speaker 2 Honestly, this sounds bad, and I actually do think I'm a good person, but
Speaker 2 I've just seen so many people that do make money that aren't the best people. Now, do they usually lose it? Yes.
Speaker 2 But I do think people are capable of making money without, like, quote, being worthy of it.
Speaker 2 I think that where it bites you in the butt for most people is that if you know that you're not using the money for good or you're not doing something good with it, you are less likely to make more.
Speaker 2
because you have this conflict internally. You know, usually you say one thing externally, you are something different internally.
You know what I mean?
Speaker 2 But for me, it was I didn't believe that I was capable of making money. Really? No.
Speaker 1 What shifted for you to believe you were capable of making money?
Speaker 2 I made money.
Speaker 2 I'm not kidding. So like
Speaker 2 I,
Speaker 2 until I,
Speaker 2 actually for me, it started with sales, which was like, until I made a sale myself, like my first, it was a personal training sale. I made a personal training sale and it was a $1,300 package.
Speaker 2 And I was like,
Speaker 2
I'm 21. And I just like, I just got $1,300 from words that came out of my mouth to somebody.
And I was like, oh my God. And then I was like, I don't, I don't need to worry about money again.
Speaker 2
I know how to make money. And it was such an empowering feeling.
But I think that continued at each level, right?
Speaker 2 And so it's like, okay, I know how to make $1,300. Do I know how to make $20,000? Do I know how to make $50,000? Do I know? And so at each time, I didn't believe that I was able to until I did.
Speaker 2 But I think that I took the action.
Speaker 2 There's a term that I think Stephen Hayes coined, which is like acting the opposite. It's like, if you want to be the opposite of what you are today, act the opposite first, right? And so
Speaker 2 I have just continued to use that time and time again, which is like, if I want to be something, I don't need to believe that I am first and I don't need to think it
Speaker 2 because that I have a very hard time doing, but I can act as though I am the thing and then work my way into it. And so, you know, when we first started really making a lot of money,
Speaker 2 I kept feeling like, when is, like, where's, when's the, like, where's the like, gotcha. You know what I mean?
Speaker 1 Like, I was like, when's it all going away or stopping?
Speaker 2
Yeah. I remember thinking that was like next.
Like, okay, I figured I'd do it. Like, but now it's definitely going to stop, right? Like, when's, when am I going to look?
Speaker 2 I probably don't know how to use the money. I probably don't know where to put the money.
Speaker 2 I probably don't know how to, you know, make sure the money doesn't like disappear because I didn't understand anything about getting returns. And so
Speaker 2 for me it was
Speaker 2 very much I didn't believe it until it occurred
Speaker 1 you needed to see it in order to believe it I needed to do it yeah
Speaker 2 do it and then see the results of doing it yeah because I think it's like it's a skill
Speaker 2 and so
Speaker 2 do you have confidence before you have the skill
Speaker 2 I don't usually feel confident until I'm competent. And so until I was competent, which I verify by like, I learned to be competent at making money and the measuring stick is I make more money.
Speaker 2
So it's like now I'm competent. Now I see I've made more money.
Confidence comes. So it's like the experience built the competence, which then led to the competence for me.
And then.
Speaker 1 What would shake your confidence today?
Speaker 1 Like if you lost a bunch of money or if people hired, stole money from you and then you had to fire them over and over again, or if bad things happened in business or whatever, like would it shake your confidence or would it not affect you?
Speaker 2 I'm educated enough now to know that you have to lose money to make money. So like,
Speaker 2 you know, it's so funny because me and Alex actually were talking yesterday about something and he's, he's counting up every loss we've had this year. And I was like.
Speaker 1 But look at all the gains.
Speaker 2 Yeah, I'm so much like with when it comes to money, I'm like, I'm just like, that's the cost of it. The cost of making money is that you're going to lose some.
Speaker 2
So it's like for me, it's like, if I want to make $100 million, I'm going to lose $10 million. If I want to make $1 billion, I'm probably going to lose 50, 100 million.
I don't know.
Speaker 2
Now, that could be in lost opportunity. That could have been in making the wrong decision.
That could be in the value of a company.
Speaker 2 But I've just seen that there's a huge correlation with how much you're willing to lose with how much you're willing to gain.
Speaker 2 Because if you're constantly saying, I don't want to lose, that's where your mind's focused. Rather than I want to make more, I want to expand.
Speaker 2 So it's like, yes, I want to make sure that I'm not being stupid with my money, but I don't want to be so focused on not losing money that
Speaker 2 i'm not opening myself up to the opportunity to make more
Speaker 2 and so i actually think if i lose money now like i'll give you an example um invested in a company two years ago bad bad investment so that was like you know close to ten million dollars just down the drain gone yeah light on fire yeah and i'm just like this company is not what i thought it was i wish i did not buy it it is a thorn in my side plus time energy yeah pulling you away from other things yeah and there's not much you can do once you've bought majority of a company So it's a tough situation.
Speaker 2 And every time I'm reminded of like, I don't want to bubble it, right? But I'm like, that's, I had to pay the price of losing there to get this huge win over here.
Speaker 2 I just look at it like that because the same decision-making principles I used to purchase that company, I also used to purchase this one. And this one is crushing it.
Speaker 2 And so it's like, sometimes I think in making money, the decision-making formula that we use to make money is good, but sometimes the outcome is still not. It's just like hiring people.
Speaker 2 Sometimes you're going to miss.
Speaker 1 The process stays the same, or maybe you learn a lesson from the process of why it didn't work, and you tweak it for the next process, you upgrade the process, but the outcome is not always going to be the way you want.
Speaker 2 Exactly. Yeah.
Speaker 1 So I think. Because you could have the same process and one company crush and the other one go bankrupt, right?
Speaker 2 Yeah.
Speaker 1 Because you can't control human factors or if the CEO quits or whatever it is, like the product doesn't work anymore or something like that.
Speaker 2 Yeah, I mean, there's, you know, when people, when I'm talking to people, and I'm like, yes, you know, they're like, how do I do this in a company? I'm like, well, this, that.
Speaker 2 And they're like, do I need to understand finance like that? I'm like, yeah, I understand finance, IT, marketing, sales, CS, this, like, all of it. Same goes for investing, and there's more.
Speaker 2 And so there's so many things that could go wrong that, you know, it just, it would behoove me to say, I made one bad investment, I should try again.
Speaker 2 You know? And so
Speaker 2 I think one thing that I've always been very good at is like I'm very patient. I can lose, but I'm pretty spot on at like,
Speaker 2 where did I fail in execution? I can tell if it's an executioner's strategy as humans.
Speaker 2 So if I've done an investment and I'm like, it was just this one thing, and I'm like, I want to try it again because I know that the strategy is right, it was just lost in execution.
Speaker 2 But you're not going to learn that unless you try again.
Speaker 1 What is the biggest lesson you've learned about winning so much over the last couple years that you didn't expect you would learn?
Speaker 2 Winning never feels good in the moment.
Speaker 2 Like I think everyone always asked me, they're like, you know, it's funny when we were growing our first business, people would come to me and they would say, congratulations, like you've had such fast growth.
Speaker 2 And I remember I would have this internal like,
Speaker 2 have I? Because it's been so painful.
Speaker 2 And I think that the reason that winning's not for everybody is because winning is hard.
Speaker 2 and because winning is painful and the entire process up until you win, you're doing hard things over and over and over again. And so you're constantly in the state of discomfort.
Speaker 2 That's also why you win, is because you're willing to put yourself into that state.
Speaker 2 And so, you know, upon selling our first business, I saw a lot of people and I saw that they didn't have a plan for what they were going to do next.
Speaker 2 And a lot of people who sold their first business, they were satiated with that sale.
Speaker 2 They were comfortable enough with whatever it brought them that then they didn't feel like they had to push themselves again. And I never wanted to be that person because I'm like, I'm not even 30.
Speaker 2 You know, I was 29 when we sold our business, 29, and I already had a multi-hundred million dollar net worth. And I'm like, people are like, you're going to take time off.
Speaker 2 And I was like, no,
Speaker 2 what am I going to do? I don't really believe in retirement per se, like in the traditional sense. I was like, no, I need to do something else.
Speaker 2 And so what I realized was the reason that so many people aren't able to win again is because they're not. willing to put themselves back into that place that they had to to win the first time.
Speaker 1 That pain, that discomfort. That was the pain.
Speaker 2 And I think that you assume that it's going to be easier the second time. The thing is, and there's a lot of studies done on this, which is like, it's not easier.
Speaker 2
You just know what to expect and you have more skills. That doesn't mean it feels easier the second time.
And I will say, in doing and scaling very quickly,
Speaker 2 acquisition.com,
Speaker 2 it doesn't feel easier. I just know what to do this time.
Speaker 2 And what I've had to do in order to keep winning is I've had to learn to love the process of being uncomfortable.
Speaker 2
And I've always wanted that for myself because growing up, I think, you know, I was in a small town. Everyone stays there.
You become a bartender, a nurse, a teacher at the local college, whatever.
Speaker 2
And I just looked and everyone's always remaining in their comfort zone. And I was like, I have to get out of that.
And so like at a very young age, I left home early. I moved across the country.
Speaker 2
I said, I never want to be that. I don't want my life to be that.
I want to die with so much potential left inside of me.
Speaker 2 And so for me, I think what's made it easy to keep winning and being uncomfortable is the fact that it's not about the business, not about making hundreds of millions of dollars.
Speaker 2 Like, it's like at some point, like, I don't even spend the money, you know, I barely do now.
Speaker 2 And so what it is about, though, is like, how can I get to the end of my life knowing that I haven't left potential on the table?
Speaker 2 And that's what I always tie it to, which is like, it's not about the money. It's about what does Layla look like? Who is that person that's able to do these things?
Speaker 2 I would like to meet her one day, but if I don't get myself to do these things that are uncomfortable, then that person, I'm never going to meet her.
Speaker 1 What are the things that your future self has that you don't have right now?
Speaker 1 Or what is she able to overcome or create or generate?
Speaker 2 You know, I think what I've recognized is that what's worked for me in many ways and in so many situations is I'm very good at structure. I build literal infrastructure of a business.
Speaker 2
And in order to do that, it's good to have order of things. I always say like, I manage chaos.
I don't stop chaos. I let it happen, but I manage chaos.
I even say like I am a wrangler of chaos.
Speaker 2
That's what I like tell myself. But there's times when trying to put structure in place actually doesn't help.
And instead I've had to really lean into being flexible rather than rigid.
Speaker 2 And so my journey has been one of becoming a more flexible person. Because I heard this quote one time and it was like the most flexible system always wins.
Speaker 2 And I realized that my
Speaker 2 what would be like my kryptonite was also what my strength was, which was like putting order in place. So it helped me build my first business and sell it so successfully.
Speaker 2 There was so much order in there. It also can cripple you because when something unexpected happens, when this happens, like it just took me a little longer to adjust than I would like.
Speaker 2 And I want to be able to quickly adjust. And so it's been this constant journey of
Speaker 2 being able to not react when something unexpected happens, but respond very thoughtfully and always ask myself,
Speaker 2 How can I turn this challenge into an opportunity? How can I respect myself more by overcoming this challenge, not less?
Speaker 2
And that's always led me to making the right decision, but it's been the hardest thing for me because I like to have structure. I like to have control, and it helps me in a lot of ways.
It also
Speaker 2 doesn't help me in a lot of ways. And so she is much more flexible.
Speaker 1 So
Speaker 1 she learns to become more flexible than you are today.
Speaker 2 Yeah.
Speaker 2 And I think also, you know, I've recognized like the people I surround myself with, what do they have that I really like and admire?
Speaker 2 I often surround myself with people who aren't like me, but they're actually opposite of me in many ways. And one of those biggest things is more spontaneous and more flexible.
Speaker 1 Play, fun.
Speaker 2
Yeah. Yeah.
It's almost like I get to live that out through the people around me.
Speaker 1 When you have losses and wins
Speaker 1 and negative thoughts creep up, how do you start to reframe those negative thoughts to actually fuel you for success in the future rather than limit you?
Speaker 2 I try to,
Speaker 2 one, I expect them.
Speaker 1 Negative thoughts.
Speaker 2 Negative thoughts, doubts, doubting myself.
Speaker 1 Negative thoughts. How often do you have negative thoughts?
Speaker 2 More often than positive ones. Really? Yeah.
Speaker 1 Yeah.
Speaker 1 What are these negative thoughts that you have? What are they
Speaker 1 thinking or what are you thinking and saying in your mind?
Speaker 2 Like,
Speaker 2
you're not as good as you think you are. You're actually really stupid.
You don't work as hard as you think you do.
Speaker 2 Maybe it's all going to fail.
Speaker 2
People don't like you. Your team doesn't believe in you.
You know,
Speaker 2 I'll make up so many stories in my brain. Really?
Speaker 1 Yeah. And how frequent are those stories?
Speaker 2 Daily. Really? Yeah.
Speaker 1 But. So, how do you use them then to get the success you want?
Speaker 2 I think I've learned to detach from my thoughts.
Speaker 2 So,
Speaker 2 you know, I think for a long time trying to suppress them or not focus on them did not help me. But detaching from them and being able to look at them as
Speaker 2 sentences in my mind rather than commands or facts has helped me understand that
Speaker 2 if I'm trying to do anything significant with my life, I'm going to have negative thoughts come up.
Speaker 2 If I'm trying to do anything new, I'm going to have negative thoughts come up because anything new your brain sees as a threat.
Speaker 2
And so it's going to say, oh, that's scary and new, even if it's not bad. It's just new and unknown.
And so we want to prevent you from doing it.
Speaker 2 So let's put these doubtful thoughts in here so that she doesn't do it because that could risk something.
Speaker 2 So I just expect it as part of the process and I don't try to make it go away. I just try to detach from them enough to just take successful actions.
Speaker 2 And that is where I focus the most, which is like, I just need to be able to detach from my thoughts enough that I can just follow the plan that I had.
Speaker 2 And that's honestly it. I don't even try to,
Speaker 2
I mean, yes, I can reframe them. I would say like I can refute them.
Sometimes I look at it like
Speaker 2 almost like the thought is on trial, like show me the evidence in either direction,
Speaker 2
which is like, okay, cool. Evidence that it could be true, evidence that it could be false.
But both of these things are trying to create certainty.
Speaker 2 You know what I mean? Like we want certainty that our negative thoughts aren't true, but what if they are?
Speaker 2
Life, like certainty is not guaranteed. Nothing's guaranteed.
And so for me, it's like, I actually have even given up trying to find the evidence for a thought being true or not.
Speaker 2 I'm just like, you have no idea. Maybe it is and maybe maybe the worst thing ever happens.
Speaker 2 You're not going to know unless you go forward anyways.
Speaker 1 And it's almost like, is this a helpful thought in helping me accomplish my goals?
Speaker 2 Right. Like, is it true?
Speaker 2
I don't know, maybe, but is it useful? No, well, then I'm not going to think about it. Right, right, exactly.
Yeah.
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Speaker 1 What would you say then is the biggest thing that is holding back young female entrepreneurs today?
Speaker 2 Females specifically.
Speaker 2 You know, I've never identified as a female entrepreneur. I've just identified as actually a business person.
Speaker 1 You know, it's funny, I wasn't able to say female because I knew you were to say this. I swear to God, I wasn't going to say this.
Speaker 1 But I'm thinking the only reason I said female, and it's so funny you said that, because the only reason I'm thinking that is because I feel like
Speaker 1 some women are going to say that they really relate to you and how you
Speaker 1 worry about how people judge you or something, right? And so I was thinking, is that the thing that females have over male entrepreneurs?
Speaker 1
Because I don't think Alex is thinking about, oh, people judge the way I look. I don't think he's worried about that in running a business.
You know what I mean? So
Speaker 1 I knew you were going to say this, but I feel like women
Speaker 1 need to know, or I feel like you would have a pulse on what maybe women are.
Speaker 1 are experiencing and what's holding them back from being a successful entrepreneur or from the ability to make more money or whatever it might be.
Speaker 1 So I'm glad you said that at response, but hopefully you have another answer.
Speaker 2
I do, I do. Yeah, yeah.
So I was going somewhere with it, don't worry.
Speaker 1 Okay, so the biggest thing that's holding female entrepreneurs back?
Speaker 2 I think
Speaker 2 the way I viewed it is when I say I've never identified as a female entrepreneur, it's because I don't find it useful.
Speaker 2 Because
Speaker 2 then I think of all the reasons why I should act differently than a male entrepreneur and why I should think that the rules of money and business should apply differently to me.
Speaker 2 And I have played by the rules that I've just seen make people successful, whether they're a man or a woman.
Speaker 2 And so that's been really helpful for me.
Speaker 2 But what I think holds a lot of women back is I think that women have traditionally been conditioned by society to be valued for other things not making money.
Speaker 2 And I don't think that's bad. I also don't think it's bad if you want to make money.
Speaker 2
But I do think that like one thing that I will never be able to rid myself of is that I am valued for also how I look. If I looked like a troll, I do not think Alex would marry me.
For real.
Speaker 2 I don't think he would.
Speaker 1 And that's not bad.
Speaker 2 Everybody doesn't, yeah, it's not bad. Women, if you look at the most popular women in the world, they're usually very attractive, a lot of them.
Speaker 2 Women can literally gain status through just being attractive and nothing else, right?
Speaker 2 I'm sure men can too, but many more men are valued for money and ability to produce. And so I think there's, first off,
Speaker 2 women have, if they want to make more money and build a business, they also have something, other things that take their attention.
Speaker 2 They've been conditioned to also value these things and work to make these things better in their life. And I get that.
Speaker 2 The second piece to it is,
Speaker 2 when it comes to what I think holds women back, is
Speaker 2 the fear of being put into one of these boxes that I think like pop culture now does, right?
Speaker 2 It's either like, you're either like a, I don't know, because I'm not as connected in pop culture because I don't watch culture.
Speaker 2 But I see it's like a lot of women that are like, I'm a single female entrepreneur, like making money on my own, like F guys.
Speaker 2
Then I see like, I'm a businesswoman, I'm all about my business and I'm this and I'm that. Or then I see like, I'm a traditional wife and I have kids and I stay home.
And it's like,
Speaker 2 I just say like,
Speaker 2 what if you could just say you're, you're an aunt, not an or? You don't need to be this or that or that. You could be and.
Speaker 2
I love to cook for my husband. I also like to run a company that's going to be worth a billion dollars next year.
Can I not make him cookies and run a billion dollar company? Right.
Speaker 2 And I want to do both. And I think that I used to think that I had to pick between those things, between being a good wife, between being,
Speaker 2 you know, between my health and in shape and liking to do hair and makeup, and between doing business. And that actually,
Speaker 2 in the beginning, when I thought that I had to sacrifice being a good wife and, you know, caring about what I looked like, it made me worse at business.
Speaker 2 because I was suppressing these other pieces of my life that I actually do value.
Speaker 2 And I said, why am I suppressing those things? And I said, well, because I'm afraid that men are going to judge me for it.
Speaker 2
Well, then, screw it. Let them judge me.
And I do get judged all the time, and I'm okay with it.
Speaker 2
It's okay if people don't understand me. It's okay if they don't understand my actual capabilities, what I actually do, if they think I am all these things.
I know who I am.
Speaker 2 And on a daily basis, I'm with myself at the end of the day.
Speaker 2 And so as long as I'm living my life in accordance with things I value, I think that most women just believe that they have to fit in a box of one of these things.
Speaker 2
You're either this girl, this girl, this girl, or this girl. That fits in these boxes that you see on social media.
It's like, you could be a little bit of all those things.
Speaker 2 It's like, who do you want to be? And I think for me, it's, I've learned I don't fit in a box. And I think a lot of people think I'm one thing or another, or they feel confused.
Speaker 1 And that's okay. It doesn't matter, though.
Speaker 2
It doesn't matter. Yeah.
So what?
Speaker 2 It doesn't change my life. Sure.
Speaker 1 From your experience then,
Speaker 1 from the challenges you had growing up to where you are now, what would you say are three truths that young women need to know about what's holding them back in life in general?
Speaker 2 I think that young women
Speaker 2 need to,
Speaker 2
the main thing holding them back is their relationship with their emotions. Really? Yes.
There's all, think about all the things people say to women about their emotions.
Speaker 2
Like, oh yeah, you're, well, I mean, let's just be real. They're like, you're on your period.
Of course you're emotional and mean to people and and this.
Speaker 2 It's like we actually give ourselves like a seven day pass to be an emotional wreck. Actually, my life changed when I stopped doing that.
Speaker 2 So it's like the first thing I think is
Speaker 2 just because you're a woman doesn't mean you cannot regulate your emotions just like anybody else. Is it harder? Yes, but then that means you have the chance to get more skills.
Speaker 2 You will be more skilled than the men at regulating your emotions if you learn how to regulate them.
Speaker 2 And so for me, I think like learning to manage your emotions and having a good relationship with them, not allowing them to dictate your life and how you act and become excuses for why you act out in certain ways.
Speaker 2
Like a lot of women, you see all the memes and things out there. It's like, yeah, be crazy.
It's like,
Speaker 2 yeah, funny, but also like not funny. Like for me to achieve the goals that I have in life and in business, I can't have my employees be like, yeah, be acting crazy.
Speaker 1 Right, right, right. They need to respect you.
Speaker 2
And nobody wants an unstable leader. So like for women to lead, it's very hard to be unstable.
Where does instability come from? Inability to regulate your emotions.
Speaker 2 And so I think that's the first thing is don't listen to what people say about how you just can't because of your hormones and because of this because you can. It just will be harder.
Speaker 1 What if Layla that people are saying, you know, well,
Speaker 1 that seems very unapproachable because my body is, you know, expressing itself to me or I just feel like the world is throwing so much chaos at me that it's impossible to regulate emotions.
Speaker 1
She's out of touch. She's got money.
She's got people that help her with things. I don't have that that help or that money.
So it's exhausting to regulate emotions.
Speaker 1 What would you say to that?
Speaker 2 It is harder
Speaker 2
for some people than others. It might be harder for women.
It might be harder when you have less resources. It is not impossible.
You have less skills. I think it is harder the less skilled you are.
Speaker 2 Some people...
Speaker 2 are incredibly skilled and they've learned it from they had great frames growing up they had great mothers they had great fathers to look up to some people didn't and so for those people it's harder it's more exhausting but what would you rather have?
Speaker 2 A life that is perpetually capped by the fact that you can't regulate your emotions or a year of learning that is exhausting, but at the end of it, you realize you can achieve your dreams because you learned how to do this.
Speaker 1 You become someone new
Speaker 1 in that process.
Speaker 2
Yeah. And I didn't, I mean, geez, I didn't have all the resource I have now when I was learning this.
And by the way, money doesn't help you learn how to regulate your emotions.
Speaker 2 I mean, once you have money, you've got lawsuits, you've got people trying to take your money, you've got people trying to steal your money. I mean, it's just same problems, they just look different.
Speaker 2 And bigger. Yeah.
Speaker 2 And so.
Speaker 1 So that's the first truth that you'd say.
Speaker 2 Yeah, that's the first truth I would say.
Speaker 1 What's the second thing that holds women back?
Speaker 2 Fear of judgment.
Speaker 2 You know, I think so many women I actually I met with when I first started making content, I met with a creator, I'll just say, somebody who many, you know, quite a famous person who had a wife who also made content in the space.
Speaker 2 And I said, like, do you have any advice for me?
Speaker 2 because I want to make content because I think that it would help me get the right people on my team I think that it's something I've wanted to do it's like I want to help people avoid the things that I have learned
Speaker 2 but like what would you say and this person and one other person that were very large male influencers said the same thing they were like
Speaker 2 You just can't care so much how you look. And I was like, what do you mean? And they were both like, you know what, stopped my wife is she just won't be recorded without any makeup on.
Speaker 2 And I was like, huh.
Speaker 2 And so, you know, I've thought about that and I really recognize it because I like to have my hair and makeup done, but I'm not going to make it a necessity to get things done.
Speaker 2 Like we do vlogging where it's like, you know, it's like they're vlogging me and I'm like, yeah, I do not look good.
Speaker 1 You still judge yourself though. You're still like,
Speaker 2 right.
Speaker 2 But the thing that I've realized is if I act the opposite of that, So if I allow people to capture me without makeup, if I don't wear makeup to work every day, if I don't do my hair and look perfect every day, then the thoughts of judgment start to get less loud.
Speaker 2 And so I think for a lot of women, we're so feared, we're so fearful of being judged
Speaker 2 for not upholding the standards that society puts on us.
Speaker 2 And it's not the standards that are the problem, it's the fear of the standards and the judgment that we put on ourselves about them.
Speaker 2 You know, men also have standards that they fear to fail or fear that they're not living up to. Everyone does.
Speaker 2 I think that just for women, the ones that hold them back are the ones that I look at and I just say, like, is it making it harder or easier for me to achieve my goals if I judge myself for this?
Speaker 2 And for me, usually it makes it harder to achieve my goals if I'm judging myself every moment that I'm on camera, every moment that I'm making content.
Speaker 2 Because I see those women, it's like they can put out a lot less.
Speaker 2 And when you put out a lot less content, and you're not able to show up in front of your team unless you look a certain way and you do all these things, well, then
Speaker 2 you get less practice at doing that thing
Speaker 2 i think it just all stems from judgment because i mean you would be shocked at the amount of people that are just afraid to be on camera because they don't they're not the exact weight that they want they don't look like a thin model they don't look like you know uh
Speaker 2 what beauty standards are today and that actually stops women from being in business showing up the way they want you know speaking on stages, doing podcasts, making content.
Speaker 2 It's this fear of judgment.
Speaker 2 And I think that before you change, because you should maybe it is good if you lose weight.
Speaker 2
Maybe it is good if you, you know, turn this step, but that is separate from the fear of judgment of others for not being perfect all the time. Right.
And the third thing?
Speaker 2 Third truth for women.
Speaker 2 You know, I think that it's probably learning that
Speaker 2 perfect is an impossible task. And in trying to be perfect, you're probably much less likable.
Speaker 2
You know, I think for a long time I just tried to be what everybody else wanted me to be. Really? To be perfect in the eyes of everyone.
Like, how can I be the perfect leader?
Speaker 2 How can I be the perfect wife? How can I be the perfect boss? How can I be the perfect friend? How can I be the perfect daughter?
Speaker 2 And that led me to be miserable, which actually led me to be less liked by everybody.
Speaker 2 Because I was just trying to be what everybody else wanted me to be rather than what I wanted to be.
Speaker 1 Right. You weren't being authentic to yourself.
Speaker 2
No. I'm like, maybe I am a bad daughter at times.
I don't call my dad sometimes for weeks. Maybe I am a bad friend.
So I don't text my friends back for sometimes a week or two.
Speaker 2
And then sometimes I'm like, yeah, I just don't feel like talking. Like, maybe I am a bad boss because today I canceled my meeting with somebody.
Like,
Speaker 2 I think I've had to accept that at times,
Speaker 2 we are all the opposite of what we want to be. And that's okay.
Speaker 2 And so, like, the best advice I can give anyone is like, I take the, I call it the I am bad frame.
Speaker 2 I am bad at times in certain circumstances like at times in certain circumstances I am bad at something or I am a bad wife a bad boss a bad friend
Speaker 2 and
Speaker 2 you know
Speaker 2 and I think for a long time even just saying I'm a bad boss like like and visceral reaction because I was just like I put so much pressure on myself to be the perfect boss
Speaker 2 But the reality is, is that if you want to be great at anything, you're going to be imperfect,
Speaker 2 judged, and disliked at times.
Speaker 2 And I think specifically for women, especially because I think
Speaker 2 there's a desire to please people, that is very hard for women specifically.
Speaker 1 Let's say you got a billion dollars in the bank, cash in the bank.
Speaker 1 What is the best use of that money for you? What will bring you the most joy and the greatest impact? if you're able to generate that much money in
Speaker 1 the bank.
Speaker 2 You know, I don't know if it would bring me, it would bring me the most joy, I wouldn't say happiness, but I would like to make the communities a better place.
Speaker 2 I'd like to make the world more than just business, you know, and I think
Speaker 2 if I had a billion dollars cash in the bank, there's a lot that I could do to not just make business better, but make the environment in which we do business better,
Speaker 2 which airs into a side that I don't wish to get into, but at some point, you know,
Speaker 2 you can't really fight that there are systems beyond your control like politics and the community and the government and I would love to help make that entire system better so that things are better not just for business owners but for people who are just like every day working a nine to five job
Speaker 2 because I love helping people build great businesses and I love building a great business and creating a place where people love to work I also just like helping people in general and so at some point you know there was a moment probably about six months ago where I
Speaker 2 was sitting on the couch with Alex and it was like, well, what happens after this, you know, a decade from now?
Speaker 1 When you've accomplished all these big goals. Right.
Speaker 2
And I was like, you know, it like scares me to say it, but like, I would like to help more than we help now. What that looks like to me is in this way, which terrifies me.
But
Speaker 2 I also just like look at it. I'm like, if I have these skills in life to be able to do these things and create this
Speaker 2 and help people to this degree, then I feel like a responsibility to do something bigger with it because I know that the same skills apply to do things to build great communities, to build great schools, hospitals, like all those things.
Speaker 2 And that is something that I would,
Speaker 2 if I were to like, I look at it like I want to go down like just like beaten, just like a disgusting corpse.
Speaker 2 Fully used up. Yeah, I would like to go down
Speaker 2
knowing that I made the world better. even beyond business.
And that is a way that I think, you know, helping the communities, like building communities. Yeah.
Speaker 2 I think that's how we do it.
Speaker 2 I look at it like we're so isolated now um especially like in america it's like people are so isolated it's like the sense of community even you know taking having a fully remote company to going in person having a headquarters having this huge building it has made my quality of life so much higher and many of the people in it and i see that and i'm like how do we create more of that yeah more community yeah
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Speaker 2 Yeah.
Speaker 1 If you,
Speaker 1 hypothetical scenario, if you were able to be a psychologist detached from yourself,
Speaker 1 but you were looking at yourself
Speaker 1 as a psychologist
Speaker 1 and you were able to analyze your entire life since you know you, everything you've been through, all the ups and downs, every thought, every emotion, every heartbreak, every joy.
Speaker 1 And you're the psychologist. What would you say are the three main things that have built you into becoming the successful person that you are? What are the drivers?
Speaker 1 What drives?
Speaker 2 I would say that she has learned to channel her obsession into something healthy.
Speaker 2 It's the first one, because I'm very obsessive.
Speaker 2 I think a lot of people, like you could consider that in many ways, a disorder, and I've been diagnosed as such, but
Speaker 2 I look at it as a superpower.
Speaker 2 And I'm obsessed about things that make my life and other people's lives better.
Speaker 2 Whereas it may have used to be things that were not. productive.
Speaker 2 I would say that's the first one. I would say the second one is resilient.
Speaker 2 I think my ability to bounce back after something really, really bad happens is
Speaker 2 it doesn't take me long.
Speaker 2
And it continues to get shorter and shorter. So I'd say resilience is the second one.
Like, can just fail epically. And I can just focus on, like, let's just try again.
Speaker 2 I'm not going to think about the failure and how bad it hurt and all that. Like, I'm just going to follow the plan and do it again.
Speaker 2 And I would say the third one is that I'm smart enough to figure out how to make things work, but dumb enough to try things.
Speaker 2
Like, I actually have a decent amount of friends who are incredibly intelligent. I do not put myself in that camp.
And they're so intelligent that they paralyze themselves.
Speaker 2 I think I'm just smart enough to make things work, but not too smart to not try things.
Speaker 1 And gullible mouth to be like, I can make it happen.
Speaker 2
Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah.
And I think,
Speaker 2 yes, I would say those are probably the three things.
Speaker 2 If that made any sense.
Speaker 1 What's the question you wish more people asked asked you that they never ask?
Speaker 2 You know, I think just in general,
Speaker 2 I've enjoyed this conversation, but many conversations that I have when people ask me questions, they ask me about my relationship with Alex and about,
Speaker 2 you know, being a wife to him and what's he like and what and I love my husband and I love him as a business partner, but I genuinely have more interest talking about business and self-development and personal development than I do what Alex eats for lunch.
Speaker 2 And so, you know, something that I was talking about yesterday, my assistants, they're like, hey, this podcast you and I went on podcast like a week ago.
Speaker 2 And it's like, they were like, what's it like being with Alex? And I was like,
Speaker 2 is this all you think I have to offer?
Speaker 2 You know, and so then I was like, I wish more people would ask me.
Speaker 2 how to build what I've built and how to become a person who can build it.
Speaker 2 And so I think like very much in line with what you've asked me today, as well as like I'm happy to get into like tactical things as well.
Speaker 2
More so because I think that that's what I think I offer that's most valuable to the world and I'm most interested in talking about. Yeah.
You know.
Speaker 1 So you wish people to ask less about Alex and more about you.
Speaker 2 Yeah, and I think, you know, we've talked about it, which is like, until I, unless I decide to build a company completely
Speaker 2
autonomously on my own. I don't think that people are going to know, they're going to see me as capable of doing what I've done.
And I'm okay with that. I also don't want to build a company of my own.
Speaker 2
I think that we have what we have because we created it together. And we're both really exceptional at what we do.
So why would I do that? Just because I want people to see me a certain way? Right.
Speaker 2 It's like, I don't want to do that. You know?
Speaker 2 So,
Speaker 2 you know, he's like my number one supporter. And he is like, yeah, why are people asking you this? Tell them it's a waste of time.
Speaker 2 He's like, I would like you to just snap back in these interviews and just be like, can you stop asking me about my?
Speaker 2 He's that's like inappropriate.
Speaker 1 It's all good.
Speaker 2 Yeah.
Speaker 2 So I think that's something that it's like funny because I think you always think you're getting over it.
Speaker 2
Because, you know, I wasn't on social media for so long. I was internal.
He's very well spoken, very articulate. He looks how he looks.
He's so good at all these things. He's very smart.
Speaker 2 And so it's like, okay, what are you, a secretary? And it's like in the beginning, it actually was that, right? And now it's come very far, but it's still,
Speaker 2 you you know, I think people are like, oh, she must love talking about what it's like to be married to him.
Speaker 2 No, I'm just married to him, but like, I'm, I love business, I love personal development, I love, I love talking about relationships, but like, what is somebody for lunch?
Speaker 2 You know, it's like, I'm like, I'm good.
Speaker 1 Yeah, what's he like in the gym?
Speaker 2 Yeah, what's he doing? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm just like, this isn't valuable.
Speaker 1 What's the,
Speaker 1 you know, not to speak about him, but I just did an interview before you.
Speaker 1 He says he has. He's
Speaker 1 this
Speaker 1 more of a reference to what he's talked about. He has a thing called the Solomon
Speaker 1 paradox or whatever, where he has a conversation with himself at 85. He said it's been about five times this year he's had this conversation with his 85-year-old hypothetical self.
Speaker 2 Yeah.
Speaker 1 Do you ever have a conversation with your older self and ask, what do I need to do or what lesson do I need to learn right now to help me get to where I want to be at 85?
Speaker 2 Yeah, I would say that it's less my older self, but more I have similar prompts. And I think the question that I ask most of the time is, I have two questions.
Speaker 2 One is,
Speaker 2
well, okay, I have three. I'll give you two questions in a frame.
The two questions are,
Speaker 2 what would I need to do to respect myself more coming out of this situation?
Speaker 2 Because for me, it's like, if I don't have the utmost respect for myself, I don't think I can do anything I've done in business. I don't think I can show up here.
Speaker 2
I don't think I can show up for my team. I don't think I can show up for my husband.
I have to respect myself first and foremost. That's my priority.
The second is
Speaker 2 which move will make it easier for me to achieve my goals?
Speaker 2 I'm always thinking, how do I make it easier to achieve my goals? How do I make it easier, easier, easier? Like, it's hard enough to achieve good goals. How do I make it easier?
Speaker 2 So those are the two questions. And then the prompt that I have is not the Solomons.
Speaker 2 It's actually,
Speaker 2 I look at it like I have my values, right? And I look at my values as they are my board of directors.
Speaker 2 And so every time that I'm presented with a decision or a situation, it's not what do I want to do.
Speaker 2 It's not what do I feel like doing, but it's what decision, what action is approved by your board of directors. And those board of directors are my values.
Speaker 1 It's almost like, what do your values demand of you doing?
Speaker 2 Yes.
Speaker 2 And I'm, I am, like, if there's one thing that I actually really feel confident in there's two things one i'm honest like to a fault i cannot i cannot lie the second is that i absolutely make decisions by my values it can be gut-wrenching it can be i'm up all night sweating it can be but i will make decisions based on my values and that visual has helped me so many times especially in business because
Speaker 2 You know, there's so many deals, for example, like Home Across Staple. It's like, man, this company is killing it.
Speaker 2 But I'm like, this founder just comes out.
Speaker 1 Something's off.
Speaker 2 Values, yeah. And I'm like, I don't want to give this person money.
Speaker 1 When did you discover your values and what are those core values for you now?
Speaker 2 You know, it's funny. I discovered those values to myself.
Speaker 2 I'm going to say it was when we were selling our first company. And I took a lot of time to think about like, what are my values, right? And I made it easy by turning those into my company values.
Speaker 2 Because I think that it's so silly that we have different values for a company than we would for ourselves. It's like, wouldn't you want the values of the company to be the values of the founder?
Speaker 2 And so the first one's sincere candor, which is like being honest.
Speaker 2 The second one is unimpeachable character, being someone that people are proud to associate with on and off the field. Meaning for me, like my personal life and my business life are in order.
Speaker 2 Like me like behind the scenes, like doing anything crazy. If I'm going to do something crazy behind the scenes, I have to be okay with showing everybody as well.
Speaker 2 Like I just can't, I'm not going to hide stuff.
Speaker 2 But I don't do anything crazy because I would like to live in a way that is unimpeachable. And then the third one is competitive greatness.
Speaker 1 Competitive greatness.
Speaker 2
Competitive greatness. I got that from John Wooden.
I was a huge fan of the pyramid of success. I don't know, I'm guessing.
Speaker 1 Of course.
Speaker 2 Yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2 And that is you play the game for the love of the game and because you want to be excellent, not because you want the outcome. And so it's really like falling in love with the process.
Speaker 2 And so it's like every time I make a decision, I'm like, does this align with my values?
Speaker 2 And I try to keep it just with those three, because if there's more than three, it's very difficult to make decisions quickly when you have like 17 values to focus on.
Speaker 1
Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's good.
You know what I mean? Sincere candor, unimpeachable character, competitive greatness. Yeah.
That's great.
Speaker 1 Yeah.
Speaker 1
I've got a couple final questions for you, Leia. This has been powerful.
I appreciate you. Yeah.
Speaker 1 I know
Speaker 1 You are a part of I'm pretty sure you're a part of Alex's book launches too, right? Yeah.
Speaker 2 But you don't have a book yourself yet no right are you thinking of writing one in the future or you're not sure i really want to write one i really don't it's a lot of work though yeah i really don't think i have time yeah it's a lot of my current i would have to change things significantly um but yeah it's funny because people see book launch like wow alex's book launch like when he did it i was like i ran the i'm assuming you did
Speaker 2
assuming you did it i literally was I ran his book launch and I was our CFO and the CEO during his last launch. It was the most, it was one of the most stressful.
I actually gave up working out.
Speaker 2
I was like, I don't know how to do all this. My CFO retired.
I couldn't get a new one. I'm already being the CEO, which all the departments rolling to me.
Speaker 2
And then he had nobody to run the book launch. And I didn't have time to get someone up to speed.
So I said, I will do it. Wow.
Yeah. And so it was, it was so fun at the same time.
That's cool.
Speaker 1
Yeah. You guys crushed it.
But are you a part of did you help create the scaling course also, the free $100 million scaling course?
Speaker 2
Oh, yes. Yeah.
Yeah. That's both of us.
Okay, cool.
Speaker 1 Is that the main thing we'd want to send people to today? Or is there something else besides following you on social media everywhere that we'd want to send people to?
Speaker 2 I would say the scaling course or my podcast is probably fine.
Speaker 1 What's your podcast? Where can people find it?
Speaker 2 Build, Layla Hormozi Build.
Speaker 2 I don't know. Is there a link?
Speaker 1 Apple Spotify YouTube.
Speaker 2 Apple Spotify YouTube, Layla Hormozi Build. That's where I would send her.
Speaker 1 So people can check out your podcast, Build with Layla Hormozi.
Speaker 1 Social media, Layla Hormozi everywhere, YouTube, Instagram, etc.
Speaker 1 Acquisition.com if people are interested in learning more about what you guys are up to there, that's where they can get the course also, the free $100 million scaling course.
Speaker 1 Yeah, and there's Alex said there's a link there somewhere for it. So I'm assuming it'll be on there at acquisition.com.
Speaker 1 Anything else we can do to be of service to you today?
Speaker 2 No, this is awesome. It was a great conversation.
Speaker 1 Okay.
Speaker 1
I got two final questions. This is a question I asked everyone at the end.
It's called the three truths. So imagine a hypothetical scenario.
Speaker 1 You get to live as long as you want on this earth, but it's the last day.
Speaker 1 And you get to accomplish all of your wildest dreams, these 10-year goals, and you blow through those and the next 20 or 50-year goals, they all happen.
Speaker 1 But for whatever reason, in this hypothetical scenario, all of your rants on your podcast are deleted.
Speaker 1
This content is gone. Every piece of content you've ever put out, we don't have access to.
So we don't have your information anymore of what you've shared.
Speaker 1
But on the last day, Layla, you get to leave behind three lessons to the world. And this is all we would have to remember you by your content.
What would those three lessons be for you?
Speaker 2 The first would be
Speaker 2
success is available to anybody willing to take successful actions. You don't have to believe that you're going to be successful to have success.
You just have to take action as if you will be.
Speaker 2 That would be the first one.
Speaker 2 The second one would be
Speaker 2 You don't ever really feel better, but you get better at feeling bad.
Speaker 2 I like to always say that I'm pretty dang good at feeling awful.
Speaker 1 I like that.
Speaker 2 I think it's the skill.
Speaker 2 And then the last one.
Speaker 2 I think if you want to win big, you have to be willing to lose big. I think if you want to love big, you have to be willing to have your heart broken.
Speaker 2 And I think that if you want to have a really big life, you have to be willing to just take a lot of losses losses in general.
Speaker 2 That's just been the case in my life, which is just
Speaker 2 you, it's so hard to access
Speaker 2 the really big expansion in life if you're not willing, if you're not willing to lose in all scenarios.
Speaker 1
These are good truce. I like those.
Thank you.
Speaker 1 Before I ask the final question, Leila, I want to acknowledge you for
Speaker 1 I just don't think I've seen this type of content from you.
Speaker 1 And I want to acknowledge you for leaning into this and expressing in this way because I think it's actually going to help a lot more people than you think.
Speaker 1 And whether millions of people watch this or hundreds of people, the people that watch and listen are going to be deeply impacted for a long time because of what you said today.
Speaker 1 Because I think people see you or perceive you in a certain way.
Speaker 1 And what you shared today just
Speaker 1 you showed people a different side of you. I think that is going to give people a lot more hope in order to overcome certain pains and challenges they have in in their life right now.
Speaker 1 And hopefully, just getting into taking the actions, the successful actions, so they can become more successful and not allowing their negative thoughts or their emotions to consume their life and think they're not worthy of accomplishing what they want.
Speaker 1 So, I want to acknowledge you for opening up and sharing, and also for being on your own journey at 32. I think you said, I think you were allowed to talk about your age, but at 32, yeah, right,
Speaker 1 just being able to
Speaker 1 navigate and manage it all so
Speaker 1 harmoniously. All the business, the judgment, the pressure, the media, it's like you got a lot going on.
Speaker 1
And seeing you navigate it imperfectly, but smoothly at the same time is really beautiful to watch. So I acknowledge you for that.
Thank you.
Speaker 1 And I'm excited to see what you create, not only in the next few years, but these 10-year goals that I've got written down. So I want to keep in track and see what happens.
Speaker 1 My final question, Leila, what's your definition of greatness?
Speaker 2 Leaving no potential on the table.
Speaker 2 There you go.
Speaker 1 Thanks for being here, Leila.
Speaker 2 Appreciate it.
Speaker 1 Thank you so much for listening to this episode. If you enjoyed this and if you found value, make sure to share this with one friend.
Speaker 1 Just copy and paste the link and text a friend where you feel would be truly inspired by this episode as well.
Speaker 1 And also, make sure to click the follow button on Apple or Spotify, wherever you're listening to this episode, because we have a massive episode coming up up next that I do not want you to miss.
Speaker 1 So make sure to follow this and be on the lookout for the next episode coming with some massive content and guests. Also, I have a brand new book called Make Money Easy.
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Speaker 1 I hope you enjoyed today's episode and it inspired you on your journey towards greatness.
Speaker 1 Make sure to check out the show notes in the description for a full rundown of today's episode with all the important links.
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Speaker 1 Share this with a friend on social media and leave us a review on Apple Podcasts as well. Let me know what you enjoyed about this episode in that review.
Speaker 1 I really love hearing feedback from you and it helps us figure out how we can support and serve you moving forward.
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