Toast Herstory: Robert Flatts (Original Airdate December 10th, 2020)

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Good morning, Millennials.

Welcome back to the Morning Toast.

Happy Thursday.

Happy Taylor Swift Day.

Happy, happy.

Happy Turtleneck Day.

Claude and I are both wearing turtlenecks.

It's inside the toaster studio.

Oh, yes.

Also, yesterday we were both wearing blazers.

Yes, blazers.

I feel as though we're both so simpatico.

I just have to say.

I wear a turtleneck specifically this one like almost every day so you're kind of like just catching up.

That would be like if I wore you know culottes like I would never hurtful.

No, no, that's like your thing.

No, and by the way, I will have you know that when I had to clean out my closets for the move, I do believe the culottes did not make the cut.

Oh my god, originally.

They did not make the culotte.

Original toasters will remember the culottes,

what I like to call gaucho pants, that really kind of shaped the toast in its early stages.

Mostly because I wore them on the first day of the morning toast.

And you wore them a lot like those first two months.

Yeah, you know, those were hard first two months.

And sometimes, sometimes you just...

can't help but put on your culottes.

And I feel like for other people, it's like, oh, I'm having a hard time.

Let me turn to my sweatpants.

And like listen to music.

No, no, no, but like in terms of fashion choices, you know, like your choices reflect the way that you're feeling.

For me, like, I turned to the cool-ots.

I turned to the cool-ots.

The cool-ots were my sweatpants of the day, and I'm not proud of it.

Like, why?

I think it's great.

At least it shows, like, you're interesting.

Like, I've literally never worn a pair of pants that wasn't like black leggings or black jeans.

And, like, you're not here just, like, taking risks.

Did they, did it work?

No.

But you are so sure of yourself that you just like took risks and put on a pair of pants very few.

few people would ever put on and i think that makes you interesting and fabulous wow that is such a nice compliment Thank you.

No, it's true.

I'll take it.

I'll take it.

Like, literally, people maybe have not noticed.

I've literally worn these leggings every single day this week and last week.

We love to see it.

I always, I'm always wearing these leggings too.

And I just, I thought, I don't know, I was going for like a mule day, but my, the color of my ankles are scary, like pink and purple.

Yeah, my skin, because I didn't get that, like, you know, I usually get sun once a year, and now I didn't get my yearly sun.

I'm turning green.

Yeah.

It's time for some self-like fake tanner.

Yeah, it is easy being green.

Yeah, I reached this point last year.

It ain't easy being green.

Speaking of the Grinch.

Well, that's Kermit the Frog, but sure.

Speaking of Green.

No, speaking of being green and not having an easy go of it.

No,

speaking of fictional green characters, yes, I actually, I'm so glad you brought that up because I really did not want to bring my recap of the very small portion of the Grinch that I watched.

I didn't want to drag it into the TV recap segment because that's like a sacred place.

I just wanted to get it out right now.

And really just

shame on NBC.

Seriously.

Like, first of all, I put it on an hour late because, like, I don't, I didn't care.

And it was a scene without Matthew Morrison.

And you'd think like it would be, you know, better.

It was just like,

besides Matthew Morrison, like, it was horrible.

Like, explain to me, you know how like the who's all have like noses that are like turned up.

Turned up.

Yeah.

Yeah.

They turn the fuck up.

So they not only gave all the who's turned up noses, they also gave all the who's like.

big fat asses.

Like they had like curves.

It was it was crazy.

Like literally everyone had like a huge, huge hips and it was like everyone was shaped like pear, which was like such an odd choice because like Matthew Marson's like running around the stage with like a big juicy ass.

And it was like so disarming.

The Grinch did have a big juicy ass.

But it was, this was like so overt.

Like

it was just so bizarre.

He literally looked like someone like...

like a like a baby with like a big diaper, you know?

Like it was so weird.

And then, so it was just like really poorly done.

I'm sorry, I have to say.

And then Matthew Marzon came down the chimney and like my life was ruined he was being so extra like you and like first of all he was completely disguised but his voice he really didn't do a good job of like nailing the grinch voice so it was like it was mr shoe like his voice just sends a chill down my spine and it's so

distinct that it was i mean i don't know what the team at nbc is thinking right now but it was a big fat failure and i was reading tweets all night and it was so funny like i just love when we can all come together to like make fun of something you know That's so funny.

I caught bits and pieces, really not a lot.

I did see Matthew Morrison.

And I just feel like there were so many people.

There are so many people who would have been amazing at it.

And even just thinking that, like, I didn't come prepared with a list of people, but like Hugh Jackman

would have crushed it.

Zach Efron.

Yeah.

But it's like a weird role.

You have to, like, that's why Jim Carrey made the Grinch so iconic.

It's like, you have to be like...

You can't be like so Hollywood.

Like you have to just like be a freak.

Yeah.

And Matthew Morrison tried so hard to be that, but he just is so cringy.

He's just a freak.

Yeah, honestly, honestly, I don't even know if Hugh Jackman would have been good at it.

The reason why the Grinch is, in my opinion, like

irreplaceable is because Jim Carrey.

Like, no one can do it like him.

Also, like, why not Jim Carrey?

Yeah.

He's around.

Yeah.

He doesn't sing, I don't think.

Anyone can sing if you try hard enough.

There's always going to be another mountain.

So I just wanted to get that out.

My TV recap with Salt Lake City and OC, Jackie and I both watched OC, even though we promised that we wouldn't.

We'll do that in the TV recap.

I just wanted to get it out there.

Like, I'm sorry to everyone who was traumatized by that performance last night.

And honestly, it's been such a hard year.

I find it really, I don't know, I find it shocking that

the executives over at NBC would like intentionally want to hurt us.

Yeah.

Yeah.

It's not nice.

It ain't right.

It ain't right.

Well, at least it's behind us.

You know, like, I feel like there was so much all of this like momentum leading up to this.

And now it's behind us.

And we can all like look ahead to 2021.

Yeah.

And we're looking ahead to tomorrow, which Taylor Swift announced this morning.

She has a a new album.

We will go into all of that.

That's why I'm wearing my cardigan today.

Getting in my cardigan.

Remember what I said about anyone singing?

Me?

Yeah, no, we're going to be talking about that forevermore.

And also, oh, last night I had just a sublime evening, if I may.

I hosted Taylor's parents, that's Olivia and Zach Shapiro, at my house.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Taylor was there too.

I remember not being invited, yeah.

Yeah, no, you were not invited.

It was, I'm really just trying to spend QT with individual family members these days.

That's just like something that I'm feeling.

Okay.

Also, I want to have, you like won't come over.

So, and I came to you on Monday night.

I have never been invited.

That's not true.

You invited me on Monday night after we had a plan to get together at my house, to which you invited yourself over.

Like, you made the plans and then tried to flip a switch.

You tried to be the princess switch.

I don't remember it that way.

Princess, I remember.

That's the rest I don't.

That's exactly how it happened, okay?

The rest I don't.

That's good.

But anyways, so I, every time I go over to Olivia, it's like I'm just so hungry and she makes such good food.

So I wanted to provide that experience for her.

And I cooked up a feasty vibe and I used like all of my fancy dishes and it was so fabulous and sensational.

You'll have to come over sometime.

I think you would have really liked the cuisine.

Chicken and pasta.

Yum, my two favorite food groups.

Yeah.

Yum.

Well, thanks for not inviting me.

I really like.

I appreciate it, you know.

No, no, you'll definitely be not invited again.

No, and that means so much to me.

And just, it's good to know where we stand.

Yes, definitely.

And tonight's the first night of Hanukkah.

Oh, yes.

If you're celebrating Hanukkah toaster, make sure to light those candles and publicize the nace.

It is so important more than ever, it always feels like to publicize the nace and be proud to be Jewish.

Dreidel, dreidel, dreidel,

I made you out of clay.

And when it's dropped, we really need to redo that song because, like, there's so many good Christmas carols.

And that's our one song, and it's just like so sophomoric.

It's like, it's the same tune as like Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Star.

Yeah, no way.

It's the same tune as like something.

La la la la la la.

La la la la la la la.

La la la la la la.

It's a familiar tune.

Yeah, and it just goes round and round.

We need to like honestly like have someone work on it, like a Jewish musician.

Honestly, like, no, I was going to say Haim, but they're not my style.

Who's like a really popular Jewish?

I heard somewhere Sean Mendez is like half Jewish.

Yeah, same with Harry Styles.

Oh, Harry Styles.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

That'd be good.

Like, just give us like a revamp.

I'm so over this one tune, and it's like the only one that's like become even remotely mainstream.

And it's just like,

I don't feel like it represents us as a culture and like how cool we are.

I actually love this song, and I feel like I'm always singing it because whenever I ring up Snatchler, I'm like, Snatchler, Snatchler, Snatchler.

I made you out of snatch.

And when your Snatch is ready,

oh, Snatchler, I shall play.

Maybe we could be the ones to jazz it up.

Allow me to get my guitar.

Oh, we're a good jam session.

By the way, I kept saying publicize the nace.

And for those who don't know, means publicize the miracle.

Ness is miracle.

And the miracle of, you know, the candles lasting.

So you put your oil lasting.

Yeah.

So you put your menorah in the window to publicize the miracle of Hanukkah.

Just a little fun fact.

And I live in a bunker with no windows, so it's hard for me to publicize the nace.

Oh my God.

Now that I have so many windows, I literally am going to put a menorah in each one.

Just

publicity.

I'm happy for you.

I'm the PR person for Hanukkah.

I'm happy for you in all your windows.

You You should come over.

Actually, in my journey to like maybe moving, I looked at an apartment yesterday that I really liked the building because I actually have a bunch of friends who live in the building, which sounds so fun to me.

And you know when like you want something to like just work so badly?

Yeah.

The apartment was just not it, except it had like the biggest kitchen I'd ever seen in a New York City apartment.

It had like a formal dining room and then like a place in the kitchen to like put a table, which is breakfast.

Which is insane.

Like that's just not a thing.

And I just, I wanted it to be the right apartment.

It just like would have been so easy if the first one I but it wasn't.

I'm sorry.

It was really upsetting.

I got my hopes like way high up.

I just want you to know like I've gotten the the boys's hopes up and the boys being the pups and our husbands.

And I feel like the toasters now too that like we live in the same building soon.

I tried.

Yeah, you're we're gonna have to try again.

What do you want me to do?

Build a new unit?

No, just like be patient for something to come on the market.

See, that's

I'm so glad you brought that up.

The one thing I don't have right now or ever is patience.

It's like, it's probably one of my worst qualities about how impatient I am.

Yeah.

And it, it impacts every facet of my life, like work, personal.

Like, I just am so motherfucking impatient.

Like, I can't wait for anything.

Okay.

Fine.

I'll tell them to speed it up.

Maybe if you could just like be a terrible neighbor and encourage some of your other people in the building to move out.

I know.

Only people, though, in a two-bedroom.

Okay, fine.

I'm going to work on it.

We're going to make this happen for you.

I found a great apartment in Olivia's building.

No pets.

Which is like, that is just so unbelievably disgusting that

I would never even want to support a building like that.

You shouldn't even hear those words.

No, I know.

Oh my God.

Vile, vile behavior.

So sick.

Okay, well, we need to get into things because we have a jam-packed fast five stories today.

Like that even one had to get cut.

Wow.

You know it's crazy.

Was it one of the ones I sent?

No.

Okay, good.

But without further ado, it is time for the fast five stories that you need to know before you wake up and take a bite out of your morning toast.

Surprise, more new Taylor Swift music is on its way.

Today, just over four months after she released her album Folklore, the Grammy winner announced that another album, her ninth studio album, is on the way.

Titled Evermore, the so-called sister album to folklore, drops later tonight at midnight Eastern Time.

So Taylor posted on her Instagram that Evermore is coming.

She said, to put it plainly, we just couldn't stop writing songs.

To try and put it more poetically, it feels like we were standing on the edge of the folklore and woods and had a choice to turn and go back or to travel further into the forest of of this music, we chose to wander deeper in.

Let me

just try and explain how I'm feeling.

Please, please.

Of course, like on the surface, I'm so excited.

Like, all I ever want is Taylor Swift music.

I feel like so many fandoms get so much music from their favorite artists.

And it's like, I waited like two years after for reputation, and then two years, like, it's so exciting.

I feel like an Ariana Grande fan, like, we just get so much music.

And so, on the surface, I'm like, so, so excited, especially because like folklore is really, like, in terms of genre, like one of my favorites, especially given the year that we've had.

And I'm just looking forward to getting another 15 songs similar to folklore.

Also, I looked at the track titles and a lot of them definitely seem like things I would be interested in.

Like I love a song just named after a woman.

So we have Dorothy.

What is that about?

Who knows?

We also have Marjorie.

Who knows?

We also have a song called The Last Cowboy, which.

I just know is going to be something.

It's going to be Betty vibes.

Like that's what I'm getting for sure.

Wow.

We're also getting a music video tonight for the song Willow, which I just love the name Willow.

So there's a lot to be excited about.

There is.

And I personally just want to say I'm excited about the title of this album because for those of you who are familiar with The Ghost of Sneech's Past, she haunts the halls of the house we rented in Utah forevermore.

And I just love that it's so spooky.

It's such a great word and I'm glad that it will be like.

It also reminds me of that Josh Groban song from Beauty and the Beast.

A stunning song if you don't know it.

So yes, I'm here for all those things.

How else are you feeling?

No, I think if I unpack my feelings a little bit more, like I woke up and I was just like feeling very overwhelmed.

that's what i was talking about i don't know what time she posted eight and i woke up like i was on my phone by like 845 and i was just getting inundated with like d i'm i'm like wake up wake up and it's like I just felt like very anxious and now I'm just feeling overwhelmed because you have work to do this weekend in digesting a whole new album.

No, and it's like I wasn't even gonna stay up till midnight tonight, but like now I have to and it's like my sleep is so important to me these days.

And I just, I don't know, I think if I really like think about how I feel, I'm feeling very overwhelmed.

Like I don't even know if I've had enough time to sit with folklore and I've listened to folklore so much, but like still it's like I'm especially after the new Disney Plus thing like I'm learning more about other songs and like I'm listening to this is me trying so much more and that was a song I used to skip like I'm just I'm feeling overwhelmed like that's the only word I can use like I'm I'm overwhelmed well I feel like I understand why you're overwhelmed, but I feel like because this is a sister album, like you'll spend the weekend listening to this, you'll be introduced to these songs, and then eventually you'll listen to folklore and Evermore together because they should be the same vibe.

They're sister albums.

She also, sisters, just like us.

And we love sisters.

And we're sisters who support other sisters.

So therefore we have to support folklore and nevermore.

Very true.

Very true.

Also, there are some collabs on the album.

Yes.

Bonnie Ver shows up again.

Love, they obviously work great together again.

Haim shows up again.

How are you feeling?

I'm not a big Haim fan, but Taylor can make me like anyone.

So like whatever.

I'm like, obviously, like the biggest National fan now.

And the National is also doing a collab, which is exciting because Aaron Dessner, who was in the folklore, for people who like aren't really like insular, like in the Taylor Swoke world, let me explain it to you.

In the Disney Plus documentary, that guy Aaron Dessner, who like created a lot of of the songs with Taylor and Jack, is a part of a band called the National.

So now I guess he's was working on folklore more as of a producer and now he's like a full-on collaborator like him and his band.

I don't know if other people are in the national, but I think there's probably a few guys.

I'm sure.

Yeah.

I think.

Well, that's like...

Yeah, because he said, like, that's how they write songs.

Like, yeah, his band.

Because, like, I just found out that like

Panic of the Disco is just like one guy.

Really?

Yeah, there's no band.

It's just Brendan Urey.

That's like his stage name.

That doesn't sound like what I thought.

No, same.

It was like shocking when I found out.

Sitch told me.

Also, I'm pretty sure that Bonnie Bear is a band and Justin's the lead singer.

No.

I think so.

I was doing some investigative work.

Just wait.

I'm Googling it.

I wasn't even investigating.

I just stumbled on it.

And that just doesn't sound familiar.

It's an American indie folk band founded by Justin Vernon.

I'm just going to choose to.

It's a band, they said was a band.

And it's categorized as a band.

That very well may be true.

I just will not continue on.

Like, I don't want to change.

it.

It doesn't work for me.

Bony Bear is a guy, and it's like, I'll know that that's wrong, but I'm just like really not interested in like resetting how I see Bony Vear.

Do you know what I mean?

Yeah, no, I understand.

It's too much for one day.

It's so much.

Like, I'm so overwhelmed.

Like, I'm just.

That's just don't even say it.

Like, I'm, that's too much for me.

Okay.

Okay.

So.

That was like when I found out that like the lead singer of Rascal Flats' name was not Rascal.

It was Gary.

Like that was a huge shake-up.

Yeah, and you're just finishing processing that.

I'm still not over it.

What's the point in naming your band?

That's what's confusing.

Bony Vear.

Like, that does sound like a name, kind of.

Kind of.

But like, Rascal Flats, that's like literally naming your band Claudia Oshre.

Like, no, no.

That makes no fucking sense.

That's not a whole name.

Rascal Flats?

That sounds someone's like real name.

Why not?

It could be, but it's not like, oh, that's an that's not like John Smith.

No, that it's literally John Smith.

Rascal is such a common name.

Flats is a last name.

Rascal's not a name.

It's not a common name.

Wait.

What?

Wait.

What?

Wait.

I can't even get into your mindset that rascal could be someone's name.

What?

Like, it could be like tree could be someone's name.

Wait, like, rascal's like a name?

Like, rough or rascal?

No, it's.

Wait.

Like, rascals, like, little rascals.

Like, oh my god, wait.

It's a mischievous or cheeky person, especially a child or a man.

So, like, no one's gonna name their kid rascal.

You're so right.

Oh, my God.

Oh, my God.

Yeah, that I'm saying the word so much.

I see how you thought it was a name.

No, like,

I can't even explain what I'm feeling right now.

Like, I'm so upset.

Oh, my God.

This whole time, I don't know.

I saw the word rascal with a capital R and I'm like, oh, it's like a name.

like Robert.

Like, Robert Flies.

Oh, my God.

I sound so stupid.

I've said this like so many times.

I've never really dug deeper.

No, it was like a damn thing.

Yeah.

Rascal's a name.

Rascal's just a word.

Like, I guess, yeah.

Yeah.

And it's almost like a comic.

It's now like a little rascals.

I guess that's

a bunch of kids who are being mischievous.

Oh, God.

Oh, my God.

I'm just learning so much today that's like really shaking up my psyche.

And so like now, are you feeling over?

I'm feeling so uneasy.

Like

everything you thought is just.

I'm so upset.

Like everything you thought you knew is being brought into question.

No, it's like the way that I saw the world is completely different now than it was 10 minutes ago.

Yeah, sometimes that can happen.

That happened to me with Dakshun.

Like I'm telling you.

That was crazy.

Did you see there was a Dakshun in Salt Lake City last night?

In one of the B-rolls, there there was a doctor running across the world.

I don't watch B-roll.

Like, I'm always scrolling on my phone.

Oh, that's funny.

Oh, my God.

I'm shook up by that.

We're just going to give you a minute to process that.

No, I'm okay.

Like,

you know what?

Rascal is a similar word to, I feel like.

What?

Snitch.

It's also like scoundrel.

So I guess if there was a band called Snitches Ain't, like, I would think that that was a weird word.

That's a full name.

That's a person to me.

First name Snitches, last name ain't.

I know her.

Yeah, of course.

Oh, my God.

Okay.

So Evermore comes out tonight.

Everyone's stream it and um I'm actually curious just like from the business side of things like um will she be able to sell over a million copies which is like her thing most of her albums have um

but because she releases an album once every two years like will she be able to do that twice in a year yes that'll be crazy yes because folklore was so successful folklore was so successful people are saying this is folklore part two okay everyone who subscribed to part one is gonna be interested in part two yeah and if the music is good the music speaks it speaks for itself you're right you can't get people to like buy like it's so crazy how that happens like actually, on the one hand, I feel like sometimes people put out bad music and like it becomes popular even.

But, like, sometimes you put out a bad album and like the people respond, art pop.

You know?

Well, that was like, we've been sitting on that for a while.

You know what I mean?

You can't just put out an album and expect it to like...

soar unless it's really, really good.

Yeah, but then even still, people put out really, really good albums that just flop, which is so crazy to me.

But that's because we live in a generation of people who have no taste.

Lotus, Christine Anguilera, justice for it.

I feel like in a lot of ways, Joanne wasn't successful.

But it was stunning.

But it was stunning, beautiful, stunning, and smart.

There's just like a few of those that, like, honestly, I think one of the greatest albums of all time is Native by One Republic, and like nobody's ever heard of it.

Yeah, but they know the songs from the commercials on ABC.

Yes.

I got my mind made up and I can't let go.

I'm feeling so uneasy.

Like, you know what?

Like, I was already feeling uneasy when we started the show because I'm having like such cramps.

I've tried to hide it from you guys, but I couldn't.

I'm the American cramper.

But all of the laughter, it's like, it's shaking up my cramps.

It's truly what they say.

Laughter is the best medicine.

It's not like my cramps have gone away, but now they're like a little disoriented.

They're like, what's this other pain in the belly?

No, I think that cramps like feed off of your depression.

So like, honestly, your endorphins are now like kicking in.

Yeah, and they're just combating cramps.

Right next to my midol.

Midol?

Midol.

Midol.

My god, remember in the beginning of quarantine when I thought that you couldn't take midol because of the acetamiphion?

And you weren't taking it?

I didn't take it for my first quarantine period.

And then I realized like I got my things mixed up.

That's crazy.

I don't take midol.

Midol is everything.

You need to give it, you need to be patient with it.

30, 40 minutes, solves all your problems.

Really?

Solves all of your...

I'm just like an Advil queen, but I need to stop taking Advil for like everything in my life.

And also, you're not supposed to take Advil when you're on

the bottom because it's a blood thinner, so it affects your flow.

Flow.

I cannot be buy that flow and a wide-set vagina.

And flow is also another prestigious end.

Yes.

Yeah.

And, you know, she needs a bad rap.

Maybe that's why she comes hard for me because she's like, you're too good of an aunt.

Like, I'm the number one rat.

That's not what she does.

She's trying to toughen you up because being an auntie is a lot of work.

It's true.

It's true.

Okay, ready for our next story?

Yes.

Tiffany Haddish turned down hosting the Grammys pre-telecast, and here's why.

Tiffany Haddish was asked to host the Grammys Pre-Telecast premiere ceremony, but the comedy superstar says she turned down the offer when the recording academy told her that she had to pay her own way.

Yeah, like not get a salary.

Not only did they ask her to host the three-hour live stream event without any compensation, but she tells Variety that they wouldn't cover hair, makeup, or wardrobe for the three-hour event.

Three hours?

Oh my God, that sounds like torture.

She said, all that would have,

all that would have had to come out of my pocket.

I don't know if this might mean I might not ever get nominated again, but I think it's disrespectful.

I totally agree.

Yes.

For context, the pre-show is not hosted by, it's not like organized by CBS.

It's done by the Academy, which is a not-for-profit organization.

So all hosts, presenters, and performers have traditionally performed gratis, including this year.

Okay, does that mean that the person who hosts the Grammys Real Show doesn't get paid?

I don't get it.

Or does CBS pay them?

Oh, I don't know.

That's a good question.

But like, obviously, presenters, performers don't get paid.

And I guess that would translate over to red carpet hosts, even though I feel like they're the hardest working people there.

Yeah, I mean, now that.

Okay, I guess the Recording Academy, like technically, yes, is a non-profit.

It doesn't give off like non-profit vibes.

No, it doesn't.

By any means, they're big, fancy telecasts.

It gives off very profitable vibes.

It gives off like very like private equity vibes.

Okay.

So I don't know.

I think asking people to work for free is a big thing in Hollywood, but like it's more so when you're up and coming.

So it's like,

honestly, Tiffany Haddish would be doing the Grammys a favor by lending her name and likeness to this pre-show telecast that I never even heard of.

You know what I mean?

Yeah.

So it's like, okay, if someone like a digital star or like a rising host got this opportunity, they would do it for free because it's worth their time for the opportunity.

Tiffany Haddish doesn't need this, she's one of the biggest comedians in the world, so they should really just be like, it is disrespectful.

You know, I understand that they're not gonna pay people to do their red carpet, but then you gotta lower interest.

Yeah, no, no, I understand you're not gonna pay people, so don't ask the biggest comedian in the world.

Like, maybe I'll do it.

Yeah, no, you know what I mean?

Like, it's it is disrespectful.

And just to like offer someone a job for no money, like

seems fucked up.

Like,

yeah, especially someone who doesn't need to do this.

It's like

they don't need it.

Tiffany Haddish will be just as relevant and famous, whether or not she hosts this telecast or not.

Yeah.

Yeah, that is really interesting, though.

And I feel like a lot of times there are sort of these question marks.

It's either like with these big opportunities, they're either getting paid so much money or they're not getting paid at all.

Right, because it's like, okay, there's someone hosting the Oscars, like when Kevin Hart was, whoa, my water bottle just like popped.

Like when Kevin Hart was supposed to host it, like in a lot of ways, he's always said that was like his biggest dream.

He would do it it for free.

But it's also like the biggest job in the world.

So like who has more money than the Oscars?

Yeah.

So I don't know.

I always think that too.

Like when you go on Jimmy Salon.

Like the Super Bowl, for example, it's so much work, but it is, and like you're giving the performance of a lifetime.

So on the one hand, you should be paid millions of dollars, but on the other hand, it's a stage like no other.

You're going to hit the top of the iTunes charts.

So they don't get paid.

Are you sure?

Yes.

But it's sponsored by Pepsi, so I would feel like Pepsi would pay people to use their name and likeness in association with Pepsi brand.

The Super Bowl performers do not get paid like last time I thought about this, but let me just double check.

I feel like that's actually one they would get paid for only because it's sponsored.

Herbal performers paid.

I feel like

they do.

They're not paid to perform according to CNBC.

Okay.

Yeah, I just have things like, do people get paid to go on Ellen or Jimmy Fallon?

I think so.

I don't know.

Right.

I think in general, like

getting paid to do press is not done.

A thing.

I agree.

Or like, do you get paid to pay in the cover of a magazine?

Yes.

So that's where it gets confusing.

But that's because you sell your story.

Right.

And like you have day rates for like the photo shoot.

Yeah.

It's confusing.

Yeah.

The line is super blurry.

We need like a true A-lister to come on the show and just like spill like, what do you get paid for?

What don't you get paid for?

Like what do you pay for yourself?

What could you get paid for?

Yeah, and it's like, okay, if you have a music label and like,

like, do they pay for your like suburbans?

Like, I just have questions.

Yeah.

You know?

Suburbans.

Where do we all come from?

People are always rolling around in suburbans, and I'm just curious who's footing the bill.

And is it Uber XL?

Right.

That's a great question because when I'm in a suburban, it's always Uber XL.

I also feel like

a lot of times these days it is Uber XL.

Like it used to not be.

It used to be like suburban.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

But now it's Uber XL.

Yeah, I agree.

I'm just, I'm, I find celebrity culture to be so interesting, but I really find like the logistics to be even more interesting.

Like, how do you get from place to place?

Like, when celebrities hang out, do you guys text each other or do the managers text each other?

I think it's a combination, but I'm just curious.

No, and Chrissy Teigen does a really good job of letting people into the logistics of being a a celebrity.

Yeah, she remember when she used to do those QA's, so she needs to do another one.

Yeah.

Okay, this next story.

Anyways, so bottom line, like, if you want Tiffany Haddish to do your red carpet, like, you got to ever, because and if you don't have a budget, that's totally understandable as a non-profit, but reach out to some hosts who could use the exposure.

Yeah, dream smaller.

Yeah.

Okay, next story is like really amazing news for Jessica Simpson.

I know.

Amazon is prepping Jessica Simpson docuseries and scripted series based on her memoir as part of a multimedia rights deal.

So Jessica Simpson is just having a great week.

Like she sold, she literally sold the rights to her book, which like every author tries to do, and she sold it to Amazon Studios.

Like that is just what, what's better?

No, there's, and after her book had like the most amazing year.

So Amazon is opening the book on Jessica Simpson after striking a broad multimedia rights deal with the pop in reality TV star.

The streamer is working on an unscripted docuseries based on Simpson's memoir open book.

So does that mean like a reality show?

That's what I was confused about because it's like, okay, it's a piece of content based on her life,

her previous life, like in her, that she already wrote about.

But then it's also unscripted.

So a reality show based on what already happened?

Yes.

It's not reality.

No.

I feel like it's a reality show of her now.

Just like they're using buying the book rights to justify it.

I don't know.

And then also a scripted, a coming-of-age scripted series inspired by the book, which sounds like her early 20s, like rising to fame.

That sounds so good.

So, so good.

Yeah, I'm really excited about this.

Open Book was truly one of the best books I read all year, except for mine, which I don't know if I've spoken about today.

I'm writing a book.

It's very exciting.

I wrote it.

Oh, shit.

Already.

It's all in here.

The ink is dry.

It's called Girl with No Job, The Crazy Beautiful Life of an Instagram Thirst Monster.

It is available for pre-order anywhere you can get books, e-books, audiobooks, and hardcover books, Amazon, Barnes ⁇ Noble, Audible, all the places.

If you go to the link, girlwithnojob.com slash book, you'll get all the links.

And I would really appreciate you supporting the book.

I'm a first-time author.

I'm very excited about it.

Jackie has read the book.

She actually has a blurb on the back.

Theo is also on the back.

So it's just truly a family affair.

Check it out.

Girlwithnojob.com slash book.

Yes, Jessica Simpson's book was one of the best things I read all year.

And now it's just going to be like the gift that keeps on giving because we're getting more content from it.

Yes, and more content from her.

Also, just want to say, Redhead's episode just dropped.

I dropped it yesterday because it was like early, but also still six days late.

Invisible Life of Addie LaRue was the book we read this month.

We're recapping it.

The book was so good.

And I think it was one of my favorite episodes that we've done this year.

One, because of the great recap, but two, we shared all of our other favorite books of the year.

And I don't want to spoil anything, but Open Book by Jessica Simpson was one of my top three books of the year that I read non-Redheads.

Did you add my book, even though it's not published yet?

No, because we tried to do like 2020 titles.

So hurtful.

But your 2021 title, why would you want to be like looped into this year?

I don't know.

Just like any airtime for my book is genuinely appreciative.

We did talk about the fact that you next month is going to be super exciting because one, we're doing a Red Heads episode first Thursday of January, as always.

Snitch's choice for the book.

I said Snitch's book choice was it, and someone commented, so the book choice is IT, like with the balloon, right?

No, it's Layla by Colleen Hoover, which is a book that I've been seeing everywhere.

It's Snitch's favorite author.

We haven't read a Colleen Hoover book yet.

It's supposed to be like very similar to Verity, which everybody loved.

So I'm just really excited about that.

But then we also get a bonus episode in January because we are sitting down our first ever author series.

We're sitting down

inside the Redhead studio.

I'll wear my turtle now.

Inside the Redhead studio, we're sitting down with first-time author claudia ashre and we are gonna get we're gonna be asking her the hard questions about her books so you're gonna want to be there for that and it's never too late to become a redhead also i feel like this episode that we just did is like the perfect kind of episode that you can listen to even if you didn't read the book i always give a summary of the book at the beginning of the episode oh that's smart and usually it's like three minutes this summary was like 10 minutes so you'll know the entire book and then you can follow along with the recap yeah you should start doing that for like popular books that are read in high schools so like a lot of high schoolers who don't want to read the books will literally tune into your podcast We should do like podcast episodes about, but it's like not just

the invisible case of the dog in the middle of the night, portrait of Dorian Gray.

Oh yeah, I actually love picture of Dorian Gray, but the Odyssey, Iliad.

Yeah.

But also it's like we'll give you the recap, but we'll also answer like DBQs as we always do.

It's like the pencil on the table was a phallic symbol.

So that we have like opinions to give you so you can raise your hand in class and be like inquisitive.

Hamlet was in love with his mother.

Yeah, but we'll have like Dana really do all that so you sound really smart.

That's actually a great idea for a a podcast.

Yeah, just like shit you need to know in high school.

No, like impress your professor.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Okay, well, are you ready for our next story that I chose?

I don't know if you've seen it, and I'm hoping that I'm about to give you some life-changing news.

Okay.

There is an iCarly revival.

Of course I've heard of it.

Sorry.

Web show hosts keep up with other web show hosts.

Set at Paramount Plus with original cast members returning.

I can't get too excited about these reboots because one, we announce them.

And I never see the actual content.

And if we do, it's like saved by the bell and they're just like being cringy and making that jokes.

And there it's like the things that I actually want to get, the thing, the reboots that I'm actually excited about, Hillary Duff, Lizzie Maguire, like never get made.

So CB.

Yeah, I just, the whole reboot industry is something that like our generation, millennials, like love.

And I just couldn't give less of a shit.

Can I tell you what I do love about the reboot industry?

Like, I love when like it's like, all right, Carly, reboot.

And we get to talk about it on the show and we get so excited cast is coming back.

And then I never want to pick it up ever again.

Ever.

You know, I do like the like think, just the announcing part of like what shows are coming back.

But like i just know what this is going to be it's going to be the cast like sitting around on zoom laughing about old jokes like i just i'm not interested i'm not here's here's what i actually am interested in as it pertains to the iCarly reunion the involvement of one Dan Schneider yeah yeah I'm I'm not seeing his name in this article okay

but I'm very curious about that as well.

They're saying that the original series stars Miranda Cosgrove, Jerry Trainer, and Nathan Kress are all set to appear in the new version of the Sharon.

What about Jeanette McCurdy?

They didn't say Jeanette McCurdy.

Okay, because Jeanette McCurdy is very vocal online about, you know, kind of the traumatizing experiences she had as a child actor and as it pertains to certain producers within the network.

So

that's actually crazy that she's not going to be there because she's...

Honestly, after Miranda Cosgrove, she's the most important and relevant main character.

For sure.

I also feel like iCarly was so ahead of its time, like girl with a web show.

Yeah.

And now it's like, if there's an iCarly in 2020, like there's a million iCarlys.

Like she's an influencer.

We are all iCarly.

Yeah.

She's a YouTuber.

She might have a podcast.

And it's like, are they really going to delve into the, like, it would actually be an interesting show if it was a show about like an influencer.

Yeah.

Technically has like many a time tried to, like Emily and Paris, like tried to capture the life of like a social media star.

And it's never not cringy.

And I would actually be really interested to see, see it one time, and not iCarly, but just like one time it'd be done correctly.

Cause it actually is like, especially people who are like really successful at their jobs and like get amazing opportunities because of of their Instagram, like, it's a super interesting life.

And if they're one time like they were able to capture it correctly, even like with Tana's series on MTV, which I didn't watch, but I don't think was very good,

she is such an interesting life, and it became so overproduced.

Like, I just one time want to see like a piece of content, whether it's unscripted or scripted, like the life of a social media star, like done right.

Yeah, I totally agree.

But it's always cringy, like beepa, hashtag, be kind.

Like, it's just so lame.

Yeah.

So, we'll keep you probably not posted on this news, but just always exciting.

Yes.

Fifth and final story.

Claude sent to me some major tech news.

Major biz news.

Major tech biz legal news.

Time for a little major tech biz legal news.

Facebook has been hit with two massive antitrust lawsuits from the FTC and 46 states are seeking to spin off Instagram and WhatsApp.

Basically just saying Facebook owning Instagram and WhatsApp is somehow a monopoly.

Yes.

Right.

That it's too big.

So these are antitrust lawsuits.

One from the Federal Trade Commission and the other one from 48 state attorneys general.

Both lawsuits revolve around the company's acquisitions of Instagram in 2012 and WhatsApp in 2014, which at the time got regulatory approval, but have recently come under heavy scrutiny as people are saying like Facebook is too big.

And I guess one way to just like make it smaller is to take off away those things.

Okay.

So here are my thoughts as a consumer and just like someone who operates in the digital space.

Like Facebook owning WhatsApp is so irrelevant.

Like I just have to say like that is not a monopoly.

Not my problem.

WhatsApp is a messaging app, it's not a social media platform.

It's an internet.

Like it's just, it's so irrelevant to this conversation.

The real conversation is like, is Facebook owning Instagram a monopoly?

And I just feel like at the time of the sale, someone should have objected.

And the fact that they didn't, it's like, I don't know.

I feel like I believe in the rules.

Like they got approved.

Like they should just be able to stay.

You know what I mean?

Yeah.

That's like annoying for like someone to like let you like do a certain thing and then take it change your mind.

Baxies.

Yeah.

Yeah.

No

no boxies facebook yeah no no

what's actually crazy is that i think if you look into it like the whatsapp acquisition is actually a much bigger deal really than instagram yeah but just like in our world we're like what irrelevant irrelevant

um and like instagram feels so big to us whereas like instagram compared to facebook is actually like kind of small yeah um and i I think it's really interesting.

I think we're at an interesting place in the technology slash government landscape.

And and

what happens here will will really determine like how things go for ever.

Forever more.

Yeah.

Wait, also though, like now that I think about it, Facebook owning Instagram, like, okay, is definitely a conglomerate.

But I don't think I would consider it a monopoly given like the fact that there are a few other like big social media players like TikTok, Twitter.

Like, it's not like they're the only two apps that are popular.

Google YouTube.

Google YouTube.

Right.

So why is Google owning YouTube okay, but Facebook owning Instagram is not?

I mean, this is fucking comparison.

This is what I'm saying.

Like, this could be, you know, something

if it's taken away from them, then maybe Google and YouTube could be next.

Yeah, that's interesting.

It'll be interesting to watch this play out.

I gotta go home and turn on NSMS.

And then also, it's like, so if Instagram is no longer part of Facebook, like, will it go back to just being like a photo sharing app and they'll stop trying to sell us everything and they'll remove shops from the bottom?

Like, no boy.

They just got like so crazy.

And that's the Facebook effect.

No, you're 100% right.

Non-chronological timeline.

I don't know her.

Algorithm.

Instagram shop, even though I love using the feature on our Morning Toast shop.

If you're looking for Morning Toast merch, head over to shopmorning toast.com.

Hate the feature.

Hate it.

Like every fourth post ad, that's a Facebook feature.

Yeah.

But I also feel like Instagram became like a major platform because of Facebook's influence.

Yeah.

And so all the things that annoy us, I guess, also contributed to its massive success.

Yeah.

Every time they change shit up, it's like so annoying for us, but it always in the long run, it sounds like really Big Brother like knows what they're doing, you know?

know yeah but also we just like probably become accustomed to whatever change it is even if it's not like most beneficial because we're addicted to these products right that's like apple like with all their new products like it's so annoying but like in the end it's so i know but like that actually feels like technology advancement like they are you know what i mean yes yes yes um okay well those were the fast five and i feel like they were quite robust and you definitely needed to know them you needed to know them i'm not gonna lie some days you really don't need to know them but today you did um okay well that's all we got for you anything you want to say before we wrap up no redheads episode is out now so if you are rdh that this episode is ending head over to the Redheads Book Club.

We have a great episode, and you never know, it might inspire you to read.

I've been getting so many messages about people who have read so much this year due to the Redheads, and we just love to see it.

Thank you guys so much for listening to the Morning Shows of the Millennium Morning Show, where we deliver the fast five stories that you need to know every Monday through Friday on YouTube.

So, if you're watching us on YouTube, please feel free to subscribe, give this video a thumbs up.

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