S5 Ep103: Hey, Are You a Freak?: Wednesday, August 3rd, 2022

Good morning, Millennials.

Welcome back to the Morning Toast.

Happy Wednesday.

Look who jumped up right in time.

It's Brassen of Brassenstrassen.

It's Brass of Brassenstrass here at the Morning Toast on Hump Day, which is my favorite day to be in the presence of a Bryce or a Streis, because, you know, after the show.

Things get a little crazy.

Yeah,

hump day.

Yeah, really crazy.

Bestiality.

Oh, yeah.

Actually, speaking of bestiality, I had a dream I was in love with my horse.

Where did you get this horse?

And the horse's name was Odessa.

Okay.

Which is weird.

But like before bed last night,

we were like playing a trivia game and like one of the answers was Odessa.

I don't know what that is.

I think it's a city.

Yeah, it is a city.

And that was my horse.

And apparently, like it was a horse from when I was a child and I was reunited with the horse.

And the horse also sang Elvis.

Oh, that's that.

I know why that is because last night I found out that Elvis comes out on HBO Max next week.

Wow, you guys.

It's everything's coming up because also Top Gun is available to watch on demand now and Elvis.

So once I watch those two movies, I will be totally caught up and I will be able to knock them off of my content plate.

That's exciting.

Check.

Check.

Check.

You're making a list and checking it twice.

To take

the bedors down?

No, no, wait.

No, it's Countess said it.

To take me down.

Yeah.

But taking the bidores down sounds better.

Yeah, it does.

It's conflating

the two franchises.

So that's here to say that Elvis will be on streaming next week, and I definitely will be watching it because I just wasn't able to get my ass to the theater this time.

Same.

And I have one thing to say.

You ain't nothing but a dog.

I get it.

Frog.

Frog?

Frog.

Frog.

Which I totally get, by the way.

I think she is saying frog.

You were watching the music video this weekend.

I asked you if she was saying frog.

And as an artist who's released music as well,

I get it.

You know, frog.

Actually, yesterday was the three-year anniversary of hot toast to the wow ones, a toast to the gula.

And, you know, we have so many new followers here because literally, like, we are the official podcast of TikTok.

Um, and I don't know if like some of our new listeners know, I have some, some bangers, actually, just two.

Um, and one of them was released three years ago yesterday.

It's called Toast by Claudia Ashre, available to stream wherever you'd like.

And it's pretty

psychotic.

It's pretty fire.

Also, I noticed in the comments yesterday, we must have some new toasters because people were asking what Patreon is.

And we never explain what it is.

We're just like, go to Patreon if you want this, that, or the other thing.

Wait, people want us to explain what Patreon is.

We would love to update.

Never ask.

Okay, so patreon.com, it's pretty much like OnlyFans, but it's just a different website where people do different things.

A lot of podcasters use it and where we post bonus content.

So we do five extra episodes.

a month.

They're different from this show.

It's not like the fast five.

It's not what you see here.

Sometimes it's vlogs.

the podcast will get into like a specific subject we'll get into beauty plastic surgery history history we're constantly discussing history yeah so we'll pick a topic and then expand on it we also do a lot of general q a's and we also do probably two or three vlogs a month depending on the month and what we're up to so that's where you can like get to know more about us when you're watching this show and you're loving it but you're like who are these girls yeah who are the girls behind the mic I want 200 more episodes from these girls where they're being more personal more open We've been saying 200 more episodes for like two years.

I think it's probably 400 more episodes.

No here.

We could do the math.

So.

And by the way, the Morning Toast podcast that you're listening to now is Monday through Friday, totally free, available wherever you get your podcast.

So if you want to A, support your girlies and B, pay $7.99, $7.99 a month for five extra episodes, it's patreon.com slash the morning toast.

And then you also get access to the Patreon community, which is like full of other toasters.

And as a Patreon member, you get exclusive access to tickets, which brings me to my first point of the day.

The pre-sale for my comedy comedy tour, the second leg of Not Like Other Girls Tour, went live this morning for Patreon members.

So

Charlotte, we've got Seattle, we've got Portland.

It starts at 10 a.m.

local time.

So, you know, the Portland and the Seattle ones haven't started yet, but Charlotte started.

Durham started.

Huntington, Long Island, New York started.

Yeah, it's very exciting.

And then general on sale for everyone starts Friday.

And hopefully there'll be some good tickets left for you guys.

Can't wait for that.

And it looks to be about 250 episodes that we have, just doing quick math, four years of doing the toast

but we started patreon in may we started the toast in april four years five episodes a month

and then 12 months a year 60 times four yeah and well um i'm done

then um plus 10 episodes from may to now right right august cool yeah cool albert's girlies yeah that's also something about us we're kind of like mathematicians no we're passionate about of course celebrity pop culture and ourselves um but we're also extremely passionate about the sciences yeah math

industry yeah revolution physics Claudia will never miss an opportunity to let you know that she was almost a physics major

excuse me almost no I was a physics major until you weren't for a year right but unless you so that year doesn't count no you only what you majored in no no no no no I'm not saying I graduated with a major in physics I'm just saying for a period of time I was a physics major I think that's completely factually accurate.

Yeah.

Okay.

Just don't even try to like strip me of my accomplishments because I will come for you.

I will come for you.

I'll come for that tiny little neck, okay?

As long as you call it tiny, it's yours.

I'll wrap my big fingers around your tiny little neck, okay?

How tiny is it?

So small I could crush it.

We're also passionate about violence.

We're also passionate actually about reading, which leads me to my next point, which is that the Redheads recorded last night and per usual, it was an amazing episode.

These girls they're just so wonderful and the dynamic between the four of us it's kind of like it reminds me of the show friends it's like everybody's obsessed so it's bad if it reminds you of the show friends everybody's obsessed like there's a character for everyone i feel that no those girls they've got charisma they really do and they've got smarts oh speaking of you've got opinions speaking of you and reading what did i you recommended the worst book okay like the worst book here's the thing you came to me for a recommendation.

I said to you, I don't really have what you're looking for.

And I'm going to do something that I never do.

And I said this.

And I'm going to recommend something that I haven't read.

Something that's on my want to read list that has an interesting description that maybe you would like.

You know, I'm not interested in the details.

All I know is that I ended up reading literally, I think the person who wrote this book sat down and was like, how many annoying, dumb.

infuriating characters can I fit into one tiny little book.

And you know what?

It was quite a lot.

I hated everyone.

I hated the plot, the ending.

Oh my God, so dumb.

Oh, two stars.

And usually I never finish, I never give books two stars because if it's that bad, I won't finish it.

No, I give books two stars when it's really bad, but I made it to 50% and I'm getting that Goodreads book for my end of year.

Right.

And I just wanted to be able to say like, you know, definitively that the book you recommended was trash.

And I didn't recommend it.

I said, like, I would never have heard of it if it wasn't for you.

Okay.

We were brainstorming and I said, I'm going to do something I never do, which is recommend a book I haven't read.

So I don't want to like trash the book, but I do like want people like i don't want anyone to have to experience what i experience so like should i say the name of the book no because it's not more personal than food and like my

two star books like are some people's five stars yeah no it for sure it was called greenwich park

the description looked good and the cover was really pretty stunning you know also i have a really hard time maybe this is you i've i read i've read like a bunch of books um that take place in London and I have like a really hard time imagining it or really kind of understanding because i have no idea what these neighborhoods are i don't know how far they are from each other i can't really picture it unless it's written from the p of of an american like something borrowed

well no something blue it takes place in london but darcy is there and she's american and she's like explaining it to me got it so there's like a level of understanding you need to have to like know what the fuck they're talking about yeah i feel that so many of the books that i read are based in london especially because my favorite author one of my favorite authors is sophie kinsella and she's a british girly and confessions of a shopaholic are all set in London and I just go with it like I don't pretend like I know what they're talking about okay so like I was reading this this whole thing and like every cracker is a digestive Jackie do you know what we want to go punting this weekend do you know what that is no so at first I was like whatever I'll figure it out like context and then they like kept saying it so I had to like click it hold it down it needs to go boating like who the knew that deadass but you know um one of our favorite authors Sally Hepworth is Australian and all of her shit takes place in Australia but she does a good job of being like oh maybe not everyone is going to be Australian reading this.

And she explains it like.

Yeah.

Or she'll be like, so I live here, but my family lives on the Gold Coast.

And I'm like, so is that close?

Near, far,

wherever you are.

But I agree.

She paints a lovely picture of Australia.

Stunning.

And I don't feel so out of the loop.

Same.

So that was one of the many issues.

Leanne Moriarty writes from Australia too.

Gorgeous place.

Yes.

Honestly, when I think of Australia, I think of this iconic, short-lived reality show on Netflix called Instant Hotel,

where they had people compete who had like different Airbnbs, but like they were cool, niche Airbnbs.

They had them all compete.

Like they all stayed at each other's Airbnbs and like gave it a grade and then someone would win at the end.

There was this like, I feel like I talk about this all the time, this incredibly annoying mother-daughter duo, Bondi.

Her name was Bondi.

And they had a condo in Bondi Beach.

And me and Ben were obsessed.

And there was also this gay couple, Leroy, and I forget his name.

And they were so obnoxious.

the pillow yes and you always say i'm like him because i have to bring my own pillow they were so snotty they went everywhere and like there was just some people who had like modest airbnbs and they put their whole life's work into it and leroy and his partner whose name i can't remember like were so fucking snobbish like so disgusting the very last episode we get to their airbnb and it's literally like a suburban home like in the middle of some random suburb with like a waterfall in front it was so janky and we're like you two have been so obnoxious to everyone i'm like this is what you were working with the whole time safe to say they did not win but justice for instant Hotel, bring it back.

Yeah, agreed.

I also think of Our Lips Are Sealed when I think of Australia.

Of course.

Iconic Mary Kate Nashley.

That's the one.

That's the one.

I hope that they're happy with that portrayal of their country.

They must be.

It must be on some, you know, like list of approved media.

When they, they were in the witness protection program in that movie, right?

So good.

Yeah, and he was from a country called Yadagli.

What?

He was from

one of the guys who was like chasing them down.

He's from Yadagli.

Oh oh my god that's funny and i'm sure in some recess of my mind that's where yarandi comes from right you're welcome what can i say except you're welcome um

oh i forgot to tell you so we had dinner at your house last night and we pretty much spent the entire evening trying to get michaela to say claudia um and i know it's a hard name to say and i'm trying not to take it personal that i'm the last person um whose name she said even though i've literally been in her house for almost two weeks um and when she went to bed last night you know zach shapiro picks her up and then like hands her to everyone to say goodnight.

And she like laid on my belly and I, she literally whispered in my ear, Claudia.

I swear to fucking God.

She's like gaslighting you because she won't say it publicly.

And she's like not going to, she's going to make everyone think that you're crazy by saying she said it.

And we're like, no, she hasn't.

We didn't hear it.

The cool thing about Olivia and Zach is that they're not emotionally manipulative like us and they believed me.

That's good.

I was like, you guys, she, she literally like leaned in for a hug.

Claudia.

Kind of like, you know, like a child in a scary movie, like, Claudia, the power of Christ compels you and then she went to bed and I haven't seen her this morning because you feel different now that it happened that's really been your goal yeah no I don't feel different if anything I'm just like that was it you didn't want to say that Claudia I love you so much thank you for being an amazing auntie yeah it's fine that's next we're working out our differences me and Michaela Eden Sassoon the Lisa arena to my Eden Sassoon yeah

And that's a Patreon joke.

So if you don't get it, join Patreon.

Speaking of Eden Sassoon, so I'm reading this book.

Oh, yeah.

Uppercut by Carrie White.

And she's a celebrity hairdresser back in the day.

Much like Vidal.

And Vidal's all over it.

Really?

Like here and there.

Actually, it's not in the main character or anything, but like she talks about, you know, the other people around her.

Like this person came from Vidal.

What's Vidal doing over in the UK?

He's doing these like blunt haircuts that inspiring looks here.

That's so interesting.

Vidal Sassoon is such an interesting like

celebrity, you know?

And does that hair care brand still exist?

For sure.

Yeah.

It's no Paul Mitchell, but.

They're all pretty good.

Yeah.

That's.

Do you think Edith Sassoon has a lot of money money from the Vidal Sassoon legacy?

I believe this is Google-able.

And did she have other siblings that she had to split it with?

I feel like she probably has siblings.

Vidal Sassoon.

Net worth.

Yep.

Net worth.

Oh, I think there's a Vidal Sassoon documentary.

He has a net worth of 200 million.

Wow.

And so.

And he's not alive, right?

I'm not seeing.

Oh, who did he leave his money to?

Oh, great question.

Great question.

Oh, and also the next question is how much is Eden from Eden Beverly knows her, right?

Yeah.

He has two surviving children.

Oh, 100 million.

Fourth wife, Rhonda, were entitled to the entirety of his state and assets.

Ooh, fourth wife.

That throws a wrench in the whole thing, you know?

Yeah.

So they say Eden's net worth is 20 million.

Nice.

But she's also an entrepreneur, so she might have like put, you know.

Lost all the money in some dumb venture about crystals.

Yeah.

Cool, cool.

That tracks for sure.

So that's your hair history lesson of the day.

Yeah.

We've got a great show.

It's Wednesday, which means we're doing Dear Toasters, which is one of my personal favorite segments here with the Morning Toast.

Our advice segment at the end of the show, we will read three prompts from three toasters in need of our help, and we will do our absolute best to deliver some really sage and sound advice.

If you ever want to write in, it's deartoasters at gmail.com.

Totally anonymous.

You can write in about literally anything you want, literally.

Literally.

Can't guarantee it'll get chosen.

No, no, I mean, if it's good, and please don't be writing essays like this episode.

Our episodes, like we try and keep them like around an hour.

If you're writing me a whole McGilla, even if it's the craziest shit I've ever heard in my fucking life, I can't read it.

Yeah, but if you love Dear Toasters and like, or you're feeling shy about your Dear Toasters, every so often we do a Dear Toasters Patreon episode where it's all dear toasters from

requests from our Patreon members.

So you have a better chance of getting selected.

We can be a little more long-winded.

It's a great time.

But for the main show, like, keep it tight.

Only need to know information, you know?

Nothing's that important.

So without further ado, to do to do, even though he isn't here next to Bruta doo to do, Theo's here.

Oh, yeah.

You guys, we ship down the Theo pillow to Jackie's Florida studio so that when I'm back in New York, I'll have a piece of Bryce with me.

She'll have my Bruno pillow and I'll have her Theo pillow and then we'll have our real dogs and so everyone will be together.

So I guess this is the official, you know, passing of the baton.

Now I've got Brass and Strass on my chair.

Brass and Strassen, Brassenstrass.

You know what?

Everyone's like, you need a centerpiece for the table right here.

We have one.

Yeah.

We have one right now.

You know, a brief observation before we dive in.

I feel like in our Florida episodes, in our Florida eras, we have

100%.

We have not sang that much.

Maybe that's why our numbers are so high.

I wonder why that is.

And I do want to thank everyone for the non-stop work they've been doing to subscribe to us on YouTube.

We're getting much closer.

I think we're at 95K.

And when I started this whole journey a couple of weeks ago, like we were so far, we were at 80.

So bullying works.

And that's the lesson from today's episode.

And I'm feeling really good about it.

Like also, I, a bunch of YouTubers who listen to the show have actually reached out to me with like some growth hack tips and tricks.

And one of those is uploading to YouTube shorts,

which I do believe has really helped our growth.

So I don't know which it is, the bullying or the shorts, but I'm going to continue to do both.

Fucking subscribe, you ugly wench.

If you're listening as a podcast, even if you're in your car, when you get to your destination, pull out your phone.

I'm talking to you in your car.

Who's like, no, she's not talking to me.

Sarah, listen up.

If your name is Sarah and you're driving in your car listening to this podcast, when you get to your destination, you have to describe to you, subscribe to YouTube and we can see the names.

And if it's not all Sarah's.

Today, yeah, like you're done.

There will be no episode tomorrow.

We will withhold our talent.

Until we hit 100K.

That's what we should do.

No more episodes until 100K.

And that would mean only like five or 4,000 of you have to get on your Gmail and subscribe.

I think that's a good idea.

And not desperate at all.

And has no ability to backfire.

Nah.

Okay, so now without further ado to do,

it is time for the fast five stories that you to do to do need to know before you wake up and take a bite out of your morning toast.

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One thing about me, it's like if you're putting vitamin C in your skincare, like I will be purchasing.

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Is it something that harnesses the power of the sun?

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So bowl and branch is b o l l a n d branch.com promo code toast amazing thank you remember like when we were in school growing up and teachers would like lick their finger so unnecessary to get um like the pages to stop sticking while obviously now in covid like that's disgusting it's also just like i remember being like get your fucking tongue away from me wench like it was so Such wenchy behavior.

It was such a violation.

Yeah, it was.

And just like something about their particular tongue, something about like a schoolroom just made everything dry.

You know what I mean?

Yeah, You know, like that is just unnecessary.

And then sometimes like, if you got your paper and you were the top one that had like the mark on it, it was moist.

Yeah, you had a fingerprint.

And I know we have a lot of teacher toasters.

So I just, I'm curious to know if that's dad has.

I don't think contemporary teachers do that.

Me neither.

I hope.

I pray.

I wonder what that was about.

Because it's like people handle paperwork all the time, but only teachers licked it.

Yeah, no, and their like glasses would be at the bottom of their nose and they would be licking.

And it was just like, it was really as if school wasn't traumatizing enough.

That was, um, that was really unnecessary now that I think about it.

Not cool, teachers.

Not cool.

Core memory of my 100%.

Like, um, do you have a teacher in your mind right now who you're like remembering do it?

No.

Oh, I am.

You just have like a favorite teacher who you put everything on.

Jackie, it's that teacher who I spoke about in my Dirty Jeans comedy special.

Yeah, you just naming her for all your life's trauma.

Behind the scenes tip, the name I used in my comedy special is not her real name.

They said I could get sued if I did, even though like it was a positive story for her.

But no.

Yeah.

Only real ones now.

Okay, now are you ready to get into the stories?

They're actually pretty good today.

Oh,

I had sent you a story from Vulture

last night.

Oh, yeah.

I thought you wanted me to read it like for my personal life.

You didn't say for the toast.

Oh, I thought it was implied.

It's fine because it's really niche.

But I just thought it was interesting.

Do you want to just update us?

So I feel like I've been talking about this a lot recently, especially on Breaking Bread, which, oh, we have tonight.

Is today Wednesday?

Today's Wednesday.

We have Breaking Bread, but it's at five o'clock tonight.

Yes, because Rolled comes first.

Well, it wasn't working for me.

And that's fine.

And other people were like suggesting, I don't even move the time.

So the time is now five o'clock Eastern time.

Join us.

It'll be so much fun.

And then as always, it'll be available on Friday.

And we support mamas.

Yeah, we do.

Otherwise, mamas.

get us.

I've been talking.

I didn't support mamas.

I've been talking about this story because I just find it really interesting, even though I think it's like a niche side of TikTok, about the Jake Novak story.

So for those who don't know, this kid, Jake Novak, who makes like YouTube videos where he like sings and choreographs and writes lyrics to like, he's trying to be funny.

And one of his went viral on TikTok because he was basically making this video when he heard about all the people leaving SNL.

He was making like an audition for himself.

And like it was so cringy and like it went viral and everyone was like blowing him up.

But at the end of the day, like he was just like, you know, doing his art, you know?

He was putting himself out there.

He was putting himself out there.

Well, how did the song go?

You used to sing it all the time.

I want to be the next SNL cast member.

So here's why I should be a contender.

My name is Jake Novak.

I don't know, the rest of it.

And then people just like went off.

People became obsessed with the cringiness of it.

Then started looking at some of his older videos, resurfacing like this cringiness.

There was like, I think he didn't do anything wrong.

And like the hate that he got was so.

Like the magnitude of it was so crazy compared to like, he was just like putting himself out there.

Like maybe he thought, I could just see his grandma being like, what if you just made a video for Lorne?

Right.

And it was like, it was earnest and it was sweet.

But then like, you know, some of his old videos, like he did one about like school shootings and it was like really

insensitive, you know?

Children dying in the schools.

Like it was really weird.

But again, like I think his intentions were pure, you know?

Okay.

He was just trying to like make art.

Yeah, it's not malintended.

It's just not.

But the way the internet ascended upon him, like, and so descended.

Descended, thank you.

He is like his real job is um he's a performer a singer in like a barbershop quartet at disneyland and people were like showing up and like harassing him it got so out of control and he posts videos once a week every wednesday and he has not been heard from since that snl video which was seven weeks ago so now the narrative on tiktok has changed like hashtag where is jake novak and people have been speaking out like you guys literally bullied him off the internet showing up to disneyland like you guys are evil and it's just like obviously now the conversation has changed but vulture landed an interview with the mysterious jake Novak and he told them everything.

He was like, this has literally been the worst time of my life.

Like people harassing my family members, literally people like were, this is really sad.

Like people were reaching out to him, making fake emails and fake websites, pretending to be Lauren Michaels.

Like, and I think for a while, like.

It got really sad and really, and really bad.

And it's just like, it's an interesting case study on like virality on the internet.

Yeah.

And his interview with Vulture was, um, it was really sad.

And then of course, like he had old tweets.

So everyone's like, no, we don't feel bad for him, which is not like a valid thing for a normal human being to say.

So it's just been like a crazy journey that I think we've now come to an end with.

Like we've heard from Jake Novak.

He got an interview on Vulture and it was really interesting to read everything that he's been through since this one dumb, cringy, but not evil video came out.

That just made me like really sad.

That's why I sent it to you.

I thought you would find it interesting.

It was like I had to read it on reader view and

I was just doing something else that I can't remember.

And I wasn't invested in the story to begin with.

And now I'm depressed.

So no, it's really, it's like, it's a terrible story.

It's a really depressed me with them showing up to his barbershop quartet.

I know.

And I saw a video of him at his barbershop quartet and he was like having so much fun.

I want to cry.

No, I know he was obviously just like passionate about his art

and took it a little too far, which haven't we all taken our art too far?

Hello, The Morning Toast.

It's called being an artist.

It's called being an artist.

Didn't Da Vinci cut his ear off?

And it's just sad.

It's really like modern day Da Vinci.

100%.

Or was it Van Gogh?

Van Gogh cut his ear off.

But he is a modern Da Vinci.

That too.

So I just thought you'd find like the end, because I've been talking about it, at least personally with you so much.

Yeah.

I thought you'd find the end of the story quite quite interesting.

I'm upset.

I know.

I wish I didn't know this.

I'm sorry.

It was upsetting for sure.

The internet is so disgusting.

Like, why can't we just leave it on the internet?

That's the thing.

It's like, you want to write like your funny mean, like comment about the cringiness, whatever.

But to show up to his work, to make these fake emails, like, get a fucking life.

And then, of course, it like always fired life into like death threats telling him he should kill himself like of course why why did i like the video no did it make me cringe to the largest extent yes would i ever message him you should kill yourself like people are not okay no i mean people aren't okay it's so sad

And that's just really not the foot I want to start.

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry.

I just, I forgot to talk to you about it this morning if you had added it to the docket.

Well, I didn't.

What did you add to the docket?

We actually have some really good stories today.

So first up, Demi Lovato is using she, her pronouns as well as they, them now.

So Demi Lovato is back to using she, her pronouns a year after coming out as non-binary and sharing her preference to go by they, them.

The singer shared on the Spout podcast Tuesday that she came to the decision.

This is podcast making news.

Of course.

Haven't heard of this particular one?

Me neither, but I will be subscribing.

Because we subscribe.

And we support other podcasts.

Like a step forward for one podcast is a step forward for all podcasts.

Agreed.

She came to the decision because she is, quote, such a fluid person.

Further, explaining why she previously adopted they, them, she said her energy last year was, quote, balanced in my masculine and feminine energy.

Quote, when I was faced with the choice of walking into a bathroom and it said women and men, I didn't feel like there was a bathroom for me because I didn't feel necessarily like a woman, the singer added.

I didn't feel like a man.

I just felt like a human.

Lovato said choosing to identify by they, them

pronouns at one point for her was about feeling human at your core.

Then she said, quote, recently I've been feeling more feminine.

And so I've added she, her again.

But I think what's important is like, nobody's perfect.

She said, everyone messes up pronouns at some point.

And especially when people are learning, it's just all about respect.

Okay.

I really can't stress enough how much I appreciate that because obviously like I try and keep up with everyone's pronouns, but not, I'm not always going to get it right.

I'm like, sometimes, especially like, you know,

you know, the certain type of internet user, like usually like white women, like thinking they're saving the earth.

Like when we talk about Halsey or we talk about Trisha Paytas, I know both of them go by she, her, and they, them pronouns.

So more often than not for me, like I'm going to go with she, her just because it's simpler for me to remember.

And of course, like they say it's fine.

So I

use it.

Halsey goes by they, them.

Like I'm intentionally out here trying to undermine someone's identity, which is not the fucking case, first of all.

So I appreciate, um, and I feel like whenever she talks about her pronouns, she always throws that in at the end.

Like, I understand people are going to like take a minute to adjust.

And I appreciate that because it could be, especially when like you talk about celebrities for a living and you talk so fast and like you're not always thinking what pronoun they identify as.

I appreciate the leeway she gives us here.

And always wanting what's best for Demi, you know, like live your life, Curly.

Yeah.

Do what you got to do.

I'm curious if you've seen any, what the people are feeling about this decision.

Well, Demi Lovato is just currently like not in a well-liked phase of her career and of course we all know it started with the with the diet um frozen yogurt right um so i don't think people really have like people really care

not care but like i don't think people right now are discussing discussing whether you know demi's pronoun like i don't think that's what people are talking about when it comes to demi lovato i think they're talking about like we're not into demi right now

I think that's the general and maybe I'm wrong so feel free to correct me because I was curious what the temperature would be about this because it doesn't seem like something that like one should do lightly it's just like today i was feeling this way and tomorrow i'm feeling that way and i feel like um

for

maybe people in the trans or non-binary community this is kind of like an affront to know that like I'm gonna be this today and that tomorrow.

And also like detransitioning is a huge deal.

And we read a book about it for the Red Hats Detransition Baby and learned more about like detransitioning and like the role that it plays like in the trans community so I would imagine that like someone like her doing this

in this way and just kind of being it feels flippant about it okay so I see how like you could see it that way but I think and again I'm not a part of the community so I don't know what the general consensus is but I think they embrace fluidity like gender not being like a construct and like almost like not having to abide by one or the other.

And I think like they embrace that type of, I don't think they would see it as flippant.

I think they they would see it as fluid, which I think the, you know, the non-binary community embraces.

I think, again, I'm not non-binary and I don't know like a ton about how they feel, but I think that the general consensus from the community is like, do whatever makes you feel good whenever.

Okay.

Think.

Okay.

And if you're able to explain to us, like in the comments and like not in a, you know, Karen, Karen sort of way, I'm genuinely curious, like if this is.

No, but I think the question that you were getting at, that I do with is like what is the non-binary community's thoughts on demi in general as like because remember the the trans community was like not happy about having caitlin jenner as like a you know kind of not a spokesperson but a representative for the community and is the non-binary community like happy you know to have demi be like a very public face of pronouns and non-binaryness yeah i don't know i i don't think people like right now are like loving Demi.

I just think her public image has been like a little chaotic in the last couple of years and people might be fatigued by that.

But I don't know if that also is

and if it's, you know, shaping how people view her decision.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

But I am genuinely curious.

So LMK.

LMK.

Are you ready for our next story?

Crazy celeb memoir news.

Jeanette McCurdy has written her memoirs.

I've been waiting for Jeanette McCurdy to like dead ass spill every fact about her childhood in a concise way for a long time.

She's alluded to it, but she's never really like been out there about it.

Okay, well, her memoir is called, I'm Glad My Mom Died.

I did know that that was the name of it.

I thought that was, you know, very catchy.

And she is on the cover holding an urn, a pink urn.

So I'm assuming her relationship with her mom was not.

Was not good.

So Entertainment Weekly has received an excerpt from the book where she talks about her

iCarly audition, like auditions before that and how like it affected her mom.

She talked about one audition where she didn't get the job and how her mom like had a breakdown.

And when she got iCarly, like she thought it was going to be like the best thing ever because finally her mom would be happy.

And

oh, that's really sad.

Yeah.

It seems really, really sad, but this is the book.

It's on sale on August 9th.

So you should read it.

Yeah.

Well, that I actually might read it if I can find the time.

Yeah.

I wonder if the book is about mostly her relationship with her mom.

I mean, even just that thing you just said is like so much pressure to put on a little kid and can really fuck you up.

So I imagine her relationship with her mom never, you know, better.

And I do think that would be interesting to read, but also, you know, as someone of a Nickelodeon historian, like I'm extremely interested in the,

you know, I don't want to say it.

I don't want to get in trouble.

I don't know why.

Oh, you think that she'll talk about?

Well, I don't know if she will, but she, I think of all the people who are in public life post that Nickelodeon.

time,

she's been the most vocal, but still not in a really kind of clear and lucid way.

And a book is a great place to do that.

Yeah.

Yeah.

And the quotes on the covers, Gerard Carmichael calls it impressively funny and Lena Dunham calls it an important, important cultural document, not to ruin the book for you.

No, no.

Who's the first person?

Gerard Carmichael.

Oh, oh, comedian.

Yeah, Lena Dunham.

That's, that's interesting for sure.

Thank you.

Cool, cool.

I do think it's interesting, like, you know, iCarly is now, I think they just got renewed for their third season in their like revival.

She's not a part of it.

Though she's like available as

well, but she's not interested.

She also had said on a podcast years ago that like most of the time she spent doing that show, those shows, iCarly, Sam, and Cat, like she was embarrassed for the content that was being put out.

And you know what?

Like respect, because I agree.

I agree.

You need to read this book.

You need to report back because you're looking for books to read like celebrity memoirs and you're always wanting to hear from Jeanette.

Yeah, no, and there's like, this is a person whose story, like, I have followed for many years.

So you will be reporting back on August 10th is what you're saying.

I really wish her the best.

I get the vibe that like her time on Nickelodeon was so damaging to her mental health.

Like, and the fact that, and what I find so interesting about this whole

Nickelodeon thing is like, there are people from the show who have like very quietly like spoken out about it.

And like, it was so damaging for them.

And then there are other people like Ariana Grande.

Like she came from there too.

And there's like so many people who are thriving, doing amazing and so many who are like the exact opposite.

So I just don't understand how that works.

Well, I imagine it has a lot to do with your family and like your child star.

And so it's like, what is your home life like?

I think Ari's mom is like, she's so close with her mom.

So she had a really good

support system.

She has her brother who she's really close with.

That's so true.

But if you are like, you know, you have a stage mom and you are the sole earner in your family, like.

it can go the other way.

Yeah.

I actually remember watching a million years ago an interview that Kiki Palmer did about that, like how being the youngest and like the income earner in your family is so toxic.

And like it can really, and more often than not, it does lead to like irreparable damage within the family.

Yeah.

So that must happen a lot with like child starters.

Yeah.

And I think Ari like also came from money.

So she didn't have that.

It wasn't as big of a deal, but like, no, when, when, the, when the kid is the one who brings you like out of a bad financial place, it's very toxic.

Yeah.

You know, Josh Peck talked a little bit about it in his book, but him and his mom, he was raised by a single mom and they were like so close.

And he was the one who wanted to go out for every audition.

And she was like, are you sure?

Are you you sure and then when he started making money like he he was so excited about it just so he could pay his mom back it was so sweet like and

and i think like to this day like everything he does like he does for his mom it was really sweet josh beck's book is like one of a celebrity memoir that like i keep thinking about it was so good i really recommend i absolutely have to read it because the thing about a celebrity memoir is like even if it's not someone that you're so obsessed with like i'm reading this carrie white book and like it's so good i don't even know who she was I didn't even know it was a celebrity memo.

I just Lauren Bossig said to read it, and it was like about the subtitle is like My Glamorous Life in Hollywood.

Great.

Here I go.

Yeah.

I thought maybe it was fiction.

I didn't know.

So I think that when someone has a story to tell, anyone doesn't even have to be a celebrity.

Someone you're a fan of.

It's just a memoir.

Yeah.

It's worth reading.

Right.

Like, Josh Pecks had like so many layers.

Like, of course, you want to read about the Drake and Josh of it all, and that was super interesting.

But like the four years where he was, like, had a terrible addiction problem, then the weight loss like there were so many layers of it it was so good

okay so you'll be reading this and he's funny like you'll be reading it yeah um i'm gonna try yeah okay i haven't been in like my celebrity memoir you know mood recently but there are many i want to pick up like i've been meaning to read the colin joes one for like a thousand years i've heard it's good but i just never even like i never i never even like start typing it in my kindle you know what i mean i think you should read that no

no wait for i was gonna say you should read that today because you're a book a day and you just finished a book that you hate But I don't want you to read a memoir and then like get fatigued because you need to do the homework on this.

Okay.

Okay.

Okay.

Are you ready for our next story, which is so sad?

Like today's episode is just depression.

Okay.

What is it?

Ferris Bueller actress Edie McClurg is a victim of elder abuse, her family claims.

You know her from Ferris Bueller.

Oh my god, of course.

Yeah, just Google her.

What was her role?

She was like the school secretary?

Yes.

Oh, that iconic Bob.

Like she had the Tracy Turnbled hair.

Yes.

Or did Tracy have her hair?

Ooh, great question.

But the family of actress Edie McClurg has claimed that she's a victim of elder abuse.

In court documents seen by the Post, the family of the star, who lives in LA and suffers from dementia, alleged that she was abused by a man claiming to be a longtime friend who reportedly attempted to take her out of California to marry her.

The documents filed in the Superior Courts of California name the abuser, the alleged abuser, as Michael Ramos, who has reportedly been living at her home since 2017.

She is 76 years old.

According to the documents, he is unemployed and does not pay rent or any expenses and was able to finagle his way into her life, reportedly attempting to move her out of California in order to marry her, despite her dementia diagnosis.

The documents also claim that he allegedly, quote, sexually assaulted her current caregiver with a report filed with the LA Police Department.

In addition, the caregiver was worried that he has or may be assaulting the conservatee and that she may not even know that it's happening to her.

Oh my God, stop.

Wait, this is literally the worst story.

Why?

Wait, I'm like, so upset.

Elder abuse, of course, any abuse is horrible, but there's something particularly evil about elder abuse.

Yeah.

Whether it's like financial, physical, sexual, and this sounds like it's all three,

is so fucking evil.

If I ever meet this man in a dark alley, like I will literally, I would kill him.

Like that's so fucking evil.

Yeah.

Ugh.

Ugh.

I'm upset to any person, like not even the fact that she's famous.

Like, and you know what's so sad is like elder abuse is extremely common.

Yeah.

I'm only hearing about this because

she's like, Yeah, you could say Faylor Spueler and celebrity.

Yeah.

Very, this is so upsetting.

So upsetting.

At the very least, I hope it shines a spotlight, though, on LGBTI.

On elder abuse.

But I agree.

Anybody who would take advantage of someone who's elderly, vulnerable, who like can't defend themselves and also doesn't even have the presence of mind

is disgusting.

Evil.

Should burn in hell.

Yeah.

For real.

That was like that story.

Remember from a few years ago of the coma patient who was pregnant?

Of course.

That was a story that changed the nation.

Yeah.

Oh my God.

Also, stories that change a nation.

I was on TikTok and I'm telling you, they tell you you don't find out anything interesting on TikTok.

Not true.

Have you heard about Carolyn Bryant?

Okay.

You know the story of Emmett Till, the 14-year-old boy during the Civil War.

Okay.

So I saw that she emerged from her house.

She's alive.

I didn't even know that.

And the Daily Mail got paparazzi pictures of her.

She's like 94 or whatever.

And now people are saying like, she, she's in hospice.

So it's like, are we going to

should they prosecute her?

Cause she's like 95.

And technically, I think when you're like a certain age or you're like really sick, they don't prosecute you because you're going to die soon.

But everyone's like, no, get her.

I could not believe that this woman was alive.

Cause I was just watching when I was in the airport, they were doing an interview with Whoopi Goldberg.

She is a producer.

They're making a movie about Emmett Till.

And I was like, damn, that's so crazy.

So like the story was like fresh in my mind.

And then I'm like, wait, because you feel like this stuff happened so long ago.

Yeah, this bitch is still alive.

So people didn't know she was alive?

Or like she was just saying hi?

I think the last sighting of her or last we heard of her was like 2004.

Okay.

So nobody really knew if she died or what she was up to.

But the Daily Mail, I guess, was like following her around and they got paparazzi pictures of her.

That's crazy.

It's crazy.

And they say she's 94 and in hospice.

And in the pictures, she looked sprightly as fuck.

I just want to say.

And by the way, if you're in hospice, I don't think you're like walking around.

She was walking her dog.

And the Daily Mail, like reporter, went up to her and her son was there, like standing in front of her, like, no comment, no comment.

It's a crazy story.

Like, it's crazy.

I couldn't believe it.

How did the Daily Mail even know where to go?

She lives in Kentucky.

I don't know.

The Daily Mail is crazy.

Yeah.

But like, she's been obviously living completely under the radar for years.

And I don't think anybody knew of like a physical sighting of her since 2004.

Wow.

But I guess they knew she was alive because like death records are public records.

Somebody has been keeping up with this.

And they found her.

Wow.

It was, it gave me such a chill.

Like it was such a crazy story she is such a crazy story yeah

well our next story switching gears selena gomez will reboot melanie griffith's 80s comedy working girl say reports huge yes selena gomez is reportedly in talks to remake working girl the 1988 mike nichols directed comedy starring melanie griffith and harrison ford one thing about me these days like selena gomez is doing something boom support it subscribing i've been living for selena and i've been keeping an eye out for her too oh you've got to.

You got to keep an eye out for Selena.

I mean, this is a great, first of all, a working girl reboot.

It's what the world needs, even though she's probably like working from home and like

she's not doing okay.

No, it's because honestly, it has potential to be like, um,

like younger.

Wait, why can't I remember the name of that show?

The one I loved on freeform.

Bull type.

Bull type.

It's giving younger.

It's the same thing.

Yeah, it's giving bull type.

Right.

Um, I hope it's not like COVID.

No, but like, if it's like 2022, she's working from home girl.

No, no, hopefully it's like she's fabulous in like a high-rise in some major city reality today like i think that the reason why working girl in 1988 was so

captured it captured the spirit of the working girl in 1988 and i think so many girls watching it's like that's me with my sneakers and my

right the blazer the suit but that you know

fashion girly energy doesn't really exist doesn't exist right now yeah that's so true oh no i'm upset maybe we need selena to bring it back 100 um have they cast anyone else?

Joan Cusack?

Who's playing Joan Cusack?

I'm not sure, but it will air on Hulu, according to Entertainment Weekly.

Wait, did you see that Selena was hanging out with Francia Raisa, the friend who gave her the kidney, who like they haven't been friends for literally three years?

Then they were out making TikToks.

Like, everything's fine.

Oh, good.

Yeah, that made me happy because that was nefarious.

That was nefarious.

Like, you couldn't say it without the.

The friend who gives you a kidney is a friend for life.

Right.

So, what happened?

But now the girlies seem to be doing really well.

Okay.

Good.

Together, which was a huge relief for me in my new Selenator era.

But I think that also helps you in your new era because that was something that just like wasn't at it.

Sitting right.

It wasn't sitting right.

But now everything sits right.

We're all good.

We're all good.

We're sitting perfectly.

I really look forward to hearing more about this project.

Yeah.

And Selena's partnership with Hulu has turned out to be extremely fruitful.

Obviously, only murders.

I'm loving this.

Selena's just been killing it.

I was actually scrolling TikTok, of course, yesterday, and like a fan account was posting clips of her from Selena plus Chef.

And then it really got me thinking, like, she has not dated publicly, or at least like with a celebrity in such a long time.

Like, we get off the list.

Yeah, let's, well, we have to add her to the list.

Yeah, we do.

I feel like she's extremely cautious of dating in the public eye and who she chooses, obviously, because her relationship.

Because her relationship with Justin was so tumultuous.

We already had this conversation where I said, Selena Gomez and Michael B.

Jordan.

I love that.

No.

Selena Gomez and Chris Evans was like, they were briefly linked, not in any like confirmed way, but ever since then, it's all I can think about.

Yeah, there's really not really someone for her here.

And she's like so famous that she really would have a hard time finding a like a commoner.

Try a businessman bow.

She needs, yeah, like a like um like a tech.

She needs like an Evan Spiegel.

Yeah.

Evan Spiegel.

Evan Spiegel is literally like the dream.

Yeah, who's the CEO of Be Real?

Love.

Except I don't think it's like successful enough for him to like have enough money.

Or her.

Sorry.

Wow.

Look at me.

Him or her um like the next big thing you know or the ceo of tick tock or something you know she loves tick tock oh does she yeah maybe taylor swift's brother

okay alexis is that a girl i'm not sure

because

images oh no it's a man is he cute like kind of i can't really like see

But here he is.

He's the CEO of B-Right.

Extremely cute.

He's fit.

Perfect.

Perfect.

Found it.

Selena.

Set it up.

Yeah.

Set it up.

I like this working girls.

Like, usually, like, I roll my eyes at reboots and stuff, but like, this is cute.

This is cute.

I mean, what else is cute?

Solo stove.

Oh, yes.

Oh, now that you have, like, a full-on backyard, you can whip yours out year-round.

Yep.

Life's best moments happen around a roaring fire.

And because, and a smokeless fire pit from solo stove makes your outdoor moments even more memorable.

So

prior to Jackie actually having a home in a backyard, we were solo stove, like portable girlies.

That's a great thing about solo stove.

It's a smokeless fire pit.

You can really take it with you anywhere.

It's not heavy at all.

Or if you are, you know, you have the luxury of having a backyard, it's perfect for year-round fires, which is what you're going to do now.

You can upgrade your backyard with a solo stove fire pit and create storyworthy moments without the fireside fumes.

Their stainless steel construction is designed to regulate airflow and burn more efficiently.

So little smoke, you'll wonder how there's so much fire.

It's the perfect catalyst for getting outside and spending more time with family and friends.

You can build lasting memories around a solo stove fire pit.

They are brilliantly engineered to be easy to use and they're built to last.

They're so confident that you'll love it, they offer a lifetime warranty and a 30-day free return policy.

Right now, you can get big discounts on all fire pits during Solo Stove's summer sale.

You can use promo code toast at solostove.com for an extra $10 off.

That's solostove.com promo code toast for $10 off on top of their incredible summer sale discounts.

Great.

Thank you for that.

Our fifth and final story

is a real human interest story.

Love.

From People Magazine.

Of course.

Twins who married twins

and gave birth.

So twins.

Twins who married twins gave birth to genetic siblings.

They say they're quote.

Wait, what?

Yeah.

Because twins, identical twins have the same DNA.

So if it's, you know, let's say it's Jane and John.

Well, Jane and it's Jackie and Claudia have the same DNA.

Yeah.

And Olivia and Margo.

Olivia and Margo have the same DNA too.

So if you do Jackie and Olivia, it's

the same DNA.

The brothers.

Isn't it a different family?

No, no, no.

Olivia?

Okay, their kids are all...

That was a bad example because now we're getting...

Oh, I get it because their kids are 50% of each of them.

And their 50% are all the same.

Right, right, right.

So what does that make the two

kids twins?

Siblings.

Not twins.

Not twins.

They don't have identical DNA.

No, because it could have been any combo.

Did each couple give birth to single kids or twins?

Singles.

Got it.

And so those two single kids have the exact same DNA.

Yes.

How has this ever happened before?

I mean, you would have to find identical twins.

Maybe it's happened in the history of New York Time, but there was no People magazine to source them and write it up and TLC to give them a show.

You have to have identical twin females and identical twin males who all love each other enough to get married and to get married and have kids.

So the cousins are also siblings and the siblings are also cousins.

Yeah.

That is crazy.

And this was something these twins did intentionally.

Like they sought out this result.

It wasn't just happenstance that they both fell in love with identical twins.

Yeah.

They realized, you know, they said, quote, we were like, oh my gosh, our dream has come true.

How lucky are we that we get to live it?

The sisters had always wanted to marry

identical twins and share their lives together.

The journey to start this heartwarming moment has been better than they could have imagined.

It's like a weird dream to have.

You know, some people dream of going to space, becoming a pop star.

It's just weird to like dream of having kids kids who are 100%

DNA matched.

When you're an identical twin, you have interesting interests.

Yeah.

And like just your,

your take on life is different.

Is different.

You know, everyone has things about them that frame what they think about, you know, what, how they live their life.

Just, you know, random quirks about them.

And I think being a twin is like a really big, I would say for me, it's like being a redhead.

Like has completely changed.

Like it's integral to who you are.

It shapes who I am.

For sure, for sure.

This is just a crazy story.

I read the headline and I just, I didn't put together that the kids were like a match.

Genetic.

This is sending 23andMe.

Like

they're spiral.

Yeah, like they don't understand.

This is a tizzy.

This is so crazy and weird.

But I'm happy.

And I saw a picture of the family's like, you know,

unique looking.

And I think that's great.

But also what's crazy is they all look like twins, obviously, but they're not.

I would be able to tell these people apart if I spent enough time with them.

Right, right.

But also, yeah, yeah, and the kids' names are Jet and Jax.

Jax and Claude.

That just seems intentionally confusing.

No, but they call him Jax because it's short for Jax and Claude.

Oh, and they call him Jet for its, because it's short for the Jets and the Sharks.

Exactly.

Right.

Okay, cool, cool, cool.

But they want, like, to be this one big, happy family.

Well, good, because it's the one they got.

That's definitely, you know, you can rely on People Magazine for finding shit like this.

And for that, we're grateful to them and the work that they do.

We truly have like a submission box on their website.

Cause like every time when I'm in an airport and I'm buying a magazine like I'm usually gonna buy people because it's the biggest.

It has the best pictures and the best

crossword puzzle.

We'll find a submission box.

Like do they have like, hey, are you a freak?

Like do you have they're literally the modern day P.T.

Barnum.

Like

how do they find they're always like man who was chained to a well for 65 years comes out with a 19 pound scrotum.

Like they always find this crazy shit.

Hey, are you a freak?

Like no, it's like those signs, P.T.

Barnum in the movie.

He was putting up like freaks, dogs.

Like, he was

like, that's what they do.

But I want to know how do they

gather these stories.

They're hunters and gatherers.

Yeah, how do they source the talent?

Right, because I know for a fact, like, when you're watching Jerry Springer, like, they have an ad.

Like, do you want to be on our show?

Send an email.

Like, that's how they source the information.

So I'm just curious what people's method of sourcing is.

That's all I was saying.

It's simply.

I think, though, there's a box that says, hey, are you a freak?

Oh, no, of course not.

If you scroll the website, who isn't a freak?

Such a good question.

Who's not a little freaky sometimes?

Well, we're about to find out in Dear Toasters, our weekly advice segment, where we try and help three forlorn toasters come to the conclusions that.

they need to come to.

So dear toasters at gmail.com is the email.

If you want to write in, thank you to everyone for being, you know, open and vulnerable with us in this time.

And let's dive in.

Hey, Jackson Claude.

Hey.

Love you guys and needed to write in to ensure that I'm not overreacting.

About a month ago, my husband and I moved to a new state and made a group of friends in our neighborhood.

These friends are all mostly couples and we really hit it off.

The husbands and boyfriends in the group decided they wanted to take a weekend trip fishing.

Flash forward to the weekend of the trip, while the wives and girlfriends are at the neighborhood pool, one of the girlfriends mentions how their man took mushrooms and Coke on the trip.

All the other women began to talk and joke about how their men had told them about it and how they thought it was so funny.

Meanwhile, I'm completely completely shocked as my husband didn't mention it at all.

I was seemingly the only wife who hadn't been told.

Naturally, I discreetly texted my husband and asked, and within a few minutes, one of the other wives gets a text from their husband.

It basically says he was just told by my husband that I wasn't happy about the drugs.

She announced to the group what the text said and completely embarrassed me.

My husband says he did not partake and he didn't mention it to me because he didn't want to get in any get anyone in trouble, as he didn't know that the other husbands had told their wives.

Do I have the right to feel like my husband lied to me?

Why would he have more loyalty to these new friends than he has to me?

I'm frustrated by the whole situation but i also struggle with coming off as a losery wife hell sincerely a toaster who's avoiding the neighborhood pool and her husband today wait i know you're like mad at like the husband thing but like i would be more mad that he literally like ratted on you to the other women yeah that's what i would be mad about who cares if you're the losery wife by the way being the wife who doesn't want her husband doing mushrooms and coke like that's it's crazy like that's fine yeah what would bother me is like you got a text from me showing my concern about something and you showed it to all the other guys.

That's like an invasion of privacy.

That's just like,

it's a lapse in judgment.

Assuming he's a good man and you love him and I'm sure that he is those things because he's your husband.

It's a lapse in judgment where he got carried away like, you know, this is a new group of friends.

Like I'm going to show them like my, you know, I got the ball and chain.

Like how she feels.

And that's, you need to be like, never again.

Like that's him not considering you at all.

Like how that makes you look, how that makes the other women feel about you.

Like that part would piss me off more than the drugs thing.

The drugs thing wouldn't piss me off because I couldn't, like, if it were my husband, first of all, maybe he didn't know about it going into it.

He's not going to do it there.

And when he comes home, he'll be like, by the way, the guys did this and that.

He doesn't need to, like, report to you and be like, mom, there's drugs for the trip.

Like, right, we're grown people.

I personally wouldn't think so, especially if he's not doing it.

But if he's doing those things and wasn't going to tell you like till after, I think that's a little dishonest.

But if it's just there, I think it's totally fine that he didn't tell you yet.

I would assume, though, eventually he would.

Yeah, no.

And I guess like maybe you're not upset about the text thing, but like like, I am.

That really would bother me.

Yeah.

And then, like, the other girl, like, reading it, I didn't send a text to the group.

Right.

The other girl.

I didn't send the text to you.

The other girl reading it like out loud to everyone.

Like, that's so fucking obnoxious of her, by the way, but it's 100% your husband's fault.

And like you need to explain that to him.

And I'm all for you guys, like, having this cup.

Like, you moved to a new place.

You found couples that you like.

You have like the girls and the guys, the sharks and the jets.

But something about this is like a little

like high school.

Agreed.

And I just think you should keep your friends and whatever, but just mentally like take one

sliver of a step back from this.

Don't get too involved with all of this.

It really showed you like the negative side of the group.

So just keep that in mind.

Like you don't have to not be friends with them anymore, but like I wouldn't tell everyone your deepest, darkest secrets.

Cause obviously this group is fucking chatty as fuck.

Yeah.

But it sounds like a fun group, you know, like fishing, pool, mushrooms, Coke.

Fun, fun, fun, fun.

Sounds like a book.

It does.

And that's like the first red flag thing that happens where like the bitchy girl in the group, her name's always Margo.

It's always Margo.

I knew that.

She was like, did you tell your husband?

And like, you're embarrassed, but you're like, no, Margo didn't mean it.

It was just a miscommunication.

Right, right.

She would never, Margo.

Next thing you know, Margo's burying a body in the woods.

100%.

That's always how it happens.

That's always how it happens.

And it's always Margo.

All right, next up.

Hey, ladies, I'll try to keep this short and sweet, but I've got a situation on my hands.

My fiancé and I are getting married in September, and my fiancé's parents have graciously agreed to pay for our entire wedding.

and honeymoon.

I seriously can't believe I'm actually getting my dream wedding and it's really all thanks to them.

The only thing is my boyfriend just nervously told me his parents will be joining us for our honeymoon.

It is so nice that they're paying for everything, but them coming on our honeymoon is insane.

When the lotus white lotus, my husband agrees, but is also too scared to say anything.

Do I suck it up?

Everything is already booked, so it's just a horrible predicament I'm in and I don't know what to do.

Please help out a fellow Floridian toaster.

That's like really manipulative.

It's not a honeymoon.

Yeah, no.

And normally, like, I'm all for, you know, putting on a smile just to get what you want.

And if she was being like a monster about the wedding, I would be like, you know what?

She's paying for it.

Just like, shut up.

But honeymoon is taking it it a little too bad.

I don't think there's one person watching or who would hear this story who would think that that's a normal thing to do.

No, you absolutely can't let her come.

And you also cannot say anything.

Your boyfriend has to.

And your boyfriend also has to be the one to like claim it was his idea, not you.

Like it'll make you look bad.

This is what in the engagement process, like it is important to note that like any communication between a bride and the in-laws must go through the husband and be like the husband's original idea.

And any communication between the husband and the in-laws should go through the groom and it it should be like the wife, the bride, and be like the bride's idea.

Like the communication during the engagement process is really delicate.

So, your husband absolutely has to be the one to break it to his parents that they cannot come.

And it has, he can't be like, oh, Sarah said she didn't want you to come and like sell you down the river, like Moses.

But that's what engagements and like planning a wedding and all of these things, it's actually like a trial of for marriage.

You have like micro courses and all these different things, communication, in-laws, finances, planning, this, that.

And it's really a test and now you're being put to the test will you pass yeah shall see you can't let this go like you absolutely have to do something about it i mean what's the point of going on the honeymoon night with save your money and stay home and take a check like oh or you get the family together for like family night and you watch white lotus and you'd be like that's crazy a mom going on someone's honeymoon that's funny if if the other way doesn't work try that Or just stay home.

Be like, oh, that's my option.

I'll stay home.

Thanks for the wedding girl.

At least we have private alone time together.

That's insane, by the way.

Insane.

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All right.

Final deer toasters is a little lengthy.

Hey, Jackson Claude.

I am married to an amazing man and I have the greatest relationship with his parents.

They've been so helpful with the baby and are over the moon excited since this is their first grandchild.

When it comes to what they want to be called as grandparents, I think it should be up to the child and see what cute nicknames they come up with.

However, my mother-in-law has given herself the name of mama.

She never asked me if I think it's okay and I feel like I'm going crazy that no one else finds it weird.

She is now constantly referring to herself in the third person as mama, and she has even gone as far as wearing jewelry that says mama on it.

Every time I hear her say mama, my stomach drops.

I've never wanted to be called mommy.

I've always preferred the name mama for myself.

It's what I call my own mother.

I mentioned this a year ago when the conversation was brought up before I was even pregnant, but it seems to be forgotten or ignored.

I find it so rude that she's taking the name for me and she doesn't find it strange.

I'm losing sleep over this issue and thinking of when my baby starts to speak, and their first word will be mama, and my mother-in-law will claim that it's about her.

She also makes comments about how it's her baby and how the baby just looks like her and my husband.

It's like her first grandchild, so I get the obsession, but it's my first baby also.

And I feel as though she's taking all of this from me.

I feel like I might explode one day, and I don't want to build up resentment.

What I want to say is: listen, bitch, I carried this baby for nine months.

My body will never be the same.

It feeds off of my tits, and I haven't slept in months.

I am mama.

Say it.

I am mama.

But I hate confrontation, confrontation more than anything.

Wait, sorry.

I hate confrontation more than anyone.

So that would never happen, but it's how I feel.

I do love my mother-in-law and I see how much joy my child brings her.

So I can never say anything to hurt her feelings.

I also don't want to make this a big thing by bringing it up to my husband and I'm worried it would upset him, even though I have a feeling he would agree with me.

I just don't want him to think I'm not grateful for his mom, who does so much for us.

Please help.

Sincerely, she ain't your mama.

Blow it up, girl.

No, this is another thing.

Your husband has to take care of this wench.

For sure.

And I feel like he might be like, oh, I thought it was weird too, but you didn't say anything.

So I thought you were fine with it.

This is not okay.

This is not acceptable.

It's not normal to stop, especially before your baby can actually speak and is confused.

Like, who is my mama?

Mama is only for the mother.

She could be called grandmama if that's what she wants, but you need to put your foot down now.

If you really can't find a way, it doesn't have to be confrontational.

You don't have to scream at her, but if you can't find a way to voice how you're feeling to her, then tell your husband that he has to do it.

Because if this is making you lose sleep at night, like as new mamas, we have so much on our plate.

So true.

So many things that you worry about as you're falling asleep at night.

You can't also be worried about who does my child think is his mama because my mother-in-law is feeling like, you know, it's she somehow is.

No, no, no.

No.

And you know what?

I'm glad you wrote into us because if you've been experiencing this like on your own, maybe you're not entirely sure if you're overreacting, but I hope that the very strong reaction Jackie and I have had, and I'm sure people in the comments will have, will empower you to be like, no, no, I'm not crazy.

Like I'm justified in being angry.

this is psychotic and you must nip it in the mud psychotic psychotic and simply if if even after being spoken to like she's not accepting like there is a psycho in your presence 100

100

get rid of her like you get rid of her also as a new mama like if anything is bothering you even if whether you're justified or not like it it has to go right whatever it is it has to go because you have too much going on especially like you're breastfeeding it's can't you can't tolerate things that do not serve you but this is not even an arbitrary, like, is it okay?

Is it not okay?

Sort of thing.

You're 100% justified.

Everything you feel is valid.

Get rid of her.

Get rid of her.

Yeah.

You say, you call yourself mom in my house one more time.

It's the last time in my house until the jewelry.

Until you.

The jewelry.

Like, I'm in, like, I'm embarrassed.

Like, embarrassed.

I feel shame for her.

The jewelry.

It feels like she's definitely working out some like unresolved trauma from her youth because this is this is like seriously like psychotic behavior like i say to harry like i'm your mom like as a fucking joke like i know it's psychotic yeah wait did you write this in about me no

no this is

no did you okay where's your jewelry that's a good call um this is really like unwell behavior and you must address it immediately your husband specifically like

Whatever route is the easiest for you to address it, whether it's a letter in the mail, I don't really, the delivery does not matter here, just the message.

Agreed, agreed.

Message must be received.

And those were the three Deer Toaster submissions.

I would like to thank everyone who wrote in.

We hope you helped.

I feel like we gave good advice.

I feel like we did you.

Also, these were

morally clear.

Yeah.

There wasn't like an ambiguity of like what to do.

So if you want to write in for next week's episode, dear toasters at gmail.com, that is our show.

Thank you so much for listening to the Morning Toast, the Millennium Morning Show, where we deliver the fast five stories that you need to know every Monday through Friday on YouTube.

So if you're watching this on YouTube, please feel free to subscribe and give this video a thumbs up.

We're also available as a podcast anywhere podcasts can be found.

So that's Spotify, iTunes, Stitcher, Public Radio, iHeartRadio, Cast Box, all the places.

So wherever you listen to podcasts, find us some more on YouTube, leave a five-star review about how beautiful, stunning, and smart we are.

Hope you guys have an amazing Wednesday.

Don't forget to hump someone you love.

And we'll see you tomorrow for Thursday's episode.

Goodbye.

Bye.