S4 Ep205: Unburdening Ourselves: Monday, November 29th, 2021

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Good morning, millennials.

Welcome back to the Morning Toast.

Happy Monday after Thanksgiving break.

We are back in studio.

Hello, Jacqueline.

Hi, I'm excited to be back in studio, though.

This is such a Monday.

I mean, for everyone, we just had a four-day weekend and now we're back to work, but we have so much to discuss here at the toast today.

That's a big day.

I'm looking forward to leaving it all on the couch.

You know, I definitely feel better because we were able to podcast in the middle of the week.

So much like Loki happened last week, like celebrity-wise, we did a Patreon episode, Fast Five, of like things we just had to talk about.

Right.

And if you're looking for like the bachelor drama, if you're looking for, what else do we talk about?

Dancing with the stars recap.

Like if you're looking for all of that, it's on the Patreon, patreon.com slash the morning toast.

It's irrelevant by today.

I know, so I'm glad we got to discuss it so we didn't have to like bring up old shit.

Yeah, I agree.

We talked about it.

I got Emma from Selling Sunset.

We had some great Patreon episodes.

We did.

There's still one more coming this month, but we got Olivia on the Patreon yesterday, which is always a pleasure.

We did our Fast Five business news stories.

Actually, it's just like world news stories for your Thanksgiving table, but you know what?

That episode is applicable through the holiday season because if you're seeing family, if you're seeing people, if you're middling at a dinner party, these are conversations, topics, and like ice-breaking questions that you should have in your back pocket.

We're also tackling big conversations like inflation, which is really an evergreen concept.

Yeah.

Art.

Art, crime, like so many, so many different subjects.

Quite informative.

So I do feel good that we were able to unload some of that shit on the Patreon.

Like we don't have so much catching up to do, but we still have a lot of catching up to do.

So much television.

You and I both finished the new season of Selling Sunset, which we will put in the TV recap.

Also, The Real House I was at Potomac finished last night and i watched the jonas brothers roast and i absolutely have to talk to someone about it i want to hear all about it but i am going to be watching it i watched it so absolutely nobody else on the planet has to i can't i can't i can't fathom it was that bad it was really bad like borderline atrocious i can't believe it i need to find out for myself okay it was the shit you hate clickbaity like oh they go to a spin class like all of it was like these pre-recorded packages that like Keenan kept throwing to you.

It was like very James Corden.

Like, it was really bad.

And the best part was Pete Davidson, and they gave him four seconds to roast.

And you just needed more.

John Legend was fine.

The wives were okay.

Like, it was really bad.

Like, it was very, very, very not good.

Well, can I tell you something that's going to cheer you up in some good content news?

Annie Live is this week.

I know.

You guys, Annie Live is this week.

And Annie's making news because she performed at the Thanksgiving Day parade.

Oh, my God.

I have to watch.

I didn't turn it on early enough to see her, but I heard she was amazing.

I know

everyone lip sings, so like, really, how good could she have been?

But maybe whatever she recorded.

The reviews are in, and apparently, Annie is a star.

That's so crazy.

And it bodes really well for Annie Live.

Okay, but here's the thing.

The thing is, is that I have a show the night of Annie Live.

I believe I'm going to be in Detroit.

Okay, so Annie DVR'd.

It's not the same.

No, it's not the same.

I was like, are you going to watch?

Of course.

Live.

You know what?

Maybe I'll...

I need to get myself like a screener, even though it's live, like you can't.

But I need to get it so I can watch it on Thursday night, like after my show, treat myself.

Okay.

I have a three-hour drive to Toronto.

You can use my YouTube TV login.

YouTube TV.

And you can watch it like on your phone.

Then I need Wi-Fi, right?

Whatever.

I'll figure it out.

You'll figure anything for Annie.

It's a big week.

Annie Live.

I start my tour this week.

I have three enormous shows.

Minneapolis, Detroit, Toronto.

Tickets available at girlknowjob.com.

There's no tickets in Minneapolis or Toronto.

But Detroit is that one show I told you guys that won't sell out.

So head over.

Come on.

Detroit.

GirlfriendJob.com slash tour.

Take a trip.

And I also did a show on Saturday.

I did a Patreon little practice show, my last one.

Such a good crowd.

I heard it was a great show.

It really was.

Like, I'm not one to toot my own horn.

I know what I'm good at and I know what I'm bad at.

And I was so good on Saturday.

That's so exciting.

Yeah.

So now I really feel like prepared enough to tackle these.

These are big theaters, like a thousand people each.

I am ready.

I'm excited.

I'm very nervous, but it's going to be a great week.

And I no longer have that enormous pit in my stomach like this is now something I'm looking forward to that is you love to hear it you do we really do we're we're sending you off with so much love and excitement and I look forward to hearing all the reviews so the schedule for this week is Monday Tuesday Wednesday in studio regular business Thursday podcast only Friday I am too busy to podcast and Jackie's pregnant so yeah you guys leave the pregnant woman she's getting big you are you really kind of

blew up I exploded exploded over Thanksgiving.

No, I mean, for me, it's really been.

You also don't dress like this, like for the toast.

No, but I got this shirt from the gap.

It's maternity because I needed maternity pajamas because the waistbands on all of my pajamas were just

too tight.

So I was like, I need maternity, so the waistband is flex.

And then I saw these cute little tops.

I was like, how chic.

So now I have more maternity clothes, and that's why you'll catch me out here with my belly.

You're looking like majorly pregnant now, whereas you usually just wear like a crew neck.

I usually wear just toast merch.

By the way, shopmorning toast.com, we're having our biggest Black Friday, Cyber Monday sale ever.

It's criminal what's going on at the website, okay?

It's criminal.

We worked so hard, and now we're literally giving shit away for free.

We're giving things away.

Everything that is not new is up to is 40% off or more in some ways.

More, by the way, almost 50.

The stocking is 15% off.

So 40% off sale Black Friday, Cyber Monday, today, Cyber Monday.

So head over to shopmorningtoast.com.

You can get the new holiday collection.

You can get the new fall collection.

And then you can also, you know, a la carte, add some $3 pop sockets.

Do you know what else you can get now at shopmorningtoast.com?

My tour merch.

I heard.

So I will be having select merch at the shows, but if you want to get stuff before, you're worried you might not get your size.

It's all available online now.

There's also more shit online than we will be bringing to shows, like more designs.

So shopmorning toast.com, if you go to the menu, there's a little thing that says not like other girls.

And we made really cool merch for the tour.

So you can get it at the show, or you could also get it online before.

So there's just lots of things to be purchasing at shopmorningtoast.com.

There are.

And as far as the holiday collection goes, we still have robes, we still have blankets, we still have earmuffs.

I love those earmuffs so much I wore them in today.

They're a premium quality.

Yeah, they're so stinking cute.

So head over there, get your tings.

And did you do any Black Friday, Cyber Monday shopping?

Not a thing.

Not one single thing.

I peruse because I always, you know, shit the bed.

Yeah.

And it's like, okay, you should spend it getting like something that you've really wanted.

And what I'm like a big purchase.

Yeah, what I want is an air fryer but I don't have space for it so okay I have an air fryer and I don't have space for it and it's something you make space for like it's really

especially in your like cooking it's the most premium thing and by the way they're really not expensive the one that we got was like 90 bucks and it works very very well of course you can get like the 400 one that's also like an oven but just get it for cyber monday then yeah actually i get some good um targeted ads for like crazy air fryers get one it will change your life okay cool also Spritz Society is having a major

BFCM sale.

That's what the kids are calling it in the industry.

Go

to their Instagram to get the unique promo code.

I think I don't want to miss it.

So it's on the Spritz Society Instagram.

Yeah, just like

it's one of those things where you just click the link and applies the code, you know?

No, you have to apply the code.

No, no, no.

Not if you click the link.

Are you sure?

I'm positive.

Or you can, you know, go to spritzsociety.com and apply the code.

Got it.

BFCM 25 is the code, but you can also click the link in our bio.

Yeah, so check that out.

It's great to celebrate the holiday season with sprites.

And if you are going over to a dinner party or someone's hosting you, a perfect gift.

It's way more fun than a bottle of wine and contains more alcohol content.

That's true.

Also,

so much catching up.

Right after this, I cannot focus on today's episode.

I'm conducting an interview for...

tomorrow's episode that might be the one I've maybe felt the most pressure to perform.

Like I'm interviewing someone.

I'm so so sad you can't be there, but I understand why.

I'm very nervous about who I'm interviewing for the toast right after this.

It's going to be amazing.

I'm so excited for you to flex your Diane Sawyer chops.

No, like

you're very prepared.

You took the time, and it's going to be so great.

And it's going to be so fun for you because it's someone who you love so much.

If you guys listen to the show, once you find out who it is, it's like one of Claudia's favorite Bravo Lebs of all time.

And someone I've really just kind of worked hard to defend and like

spread the good word about because this person, you know, has been villainized at some points.

And I'm just, I'm really looking forward to first of all meeting her and thanking her for her work.

Yeah.

No, I'm excited for you.

You guys will find out who it is tomorrow and it's going to be great.

So we just have a busy week.

Sales, interviews, tour, pregnancies.

Such a busy week.

Children.

Such a busy week.

You know, I had the craziest dream.

I told you I woke up at 6.30.

Okay.

You're going to die at what I did today.

Okay.

But you know how we were talking about like dreams would just reveal so much.

Okay, this I would love some help in revealing what this says.

So I,

me and Ben had a baby, but like it wasn't our baby.

It was like a child that like we both parented, but like we weren't like accepting it as like our child.

And like we got home from the hospital, Ben accidentally like kicked the baby off the bed.

I forgot to feed the baby.

I could see the baby's ribs.

It was like really giving me, it was the worst dream ever.

Okay, do you think it had to do with the dog that you saw yesterday?

I I don't know, but I just want to let you know, I woke up super early, couldn't go back to bed, which is like such a not, not like me thing.

Like I can always go back to bed.

So I was like, is my body telling me I'm pregnant?

Even though there's like no way.

I got up, I took a pregnancy test.

I'm not pregnant.

I just like.

It was so unlike me to wake up and not be able to go back to sleep.

It was such a bothersome dream.

Yeah.

That I was like, is this my body?

You know, they always say like when you know your body tells you you're pregnant.

I'm like, is this my body telling me I'm pregnant?

Oh, that's an interesting sign.

But it's not.

Okay, cool.

It was a really traumatizing morning.

I've been up forever.

That's nice for you.

I'm at the phase of pregnancy where like, now my sleep has really been compromised.

Like, I was so looking forward to this last week because I was like, I'm going to sleep till the cows come home.

Never slept less in my life.

By that fucking sleep.

In my fucking life.

Yeah.

So that's, that's really hard for me because you guys know like sleep is my

favorite activity under the sun.

You better get used to it.

Yeah, no, that's the body, you know, getting you prepared for like,

like I literally wake up every single hour.

I sleep as light as a feather now

sucks but it's just so funny that's nature doing its thing preparing you for when you need to be sleeping lightly because you're taking care of a life do you can you take melatonin or something not i haven't looked into it and i wouldn't i wouldn't want to take it that's really definitely turning me off to children like no sleep even when you're pregnant like it hasn't even started no but i've been sleeping pretty good up until now maybe this is just a phase are you using the pillow

i use the pillow for lounging, not for sleeping.

I laid my ass in that pillow.

It is fabulous.

I think I should just get a pregnancy pillow like for life.

No, like you're like pregnant by proxy.

Literally.

And as I've said so many times, like being pregnant is the thing for you.

No, I know.

Except for like the after part where like you have the children and you have to raise them and like be selfless and like look ugly, you know?

I guess, but you can do it your own way.

I mean, look at Christine.

Totally.

We're going to talk about selling sunset, but also, one last thing.

And I hate to bring this up because I know it pains you but I'm going to Luke Combs concert tonight you know I've done a lot of self-work about this and I

I've I'm gonna try and be there for you guys mentally you don't have to

understand I don't think I'm gonna mute your stories like I think I'm gonna try to like push through and watch them because

I'm just so excited for you and so,

so, so jealous.

I know.

I'm really, do you think that like, if it weren't for COVID, would you as a pregnant person go to a concert?

Okay, so it's the COVID element.

Yes.

Okay.

But also like, doesn't it sound like torture, like standing around with your belly?

No, it doesn't.

Okay.

Because one, you can sit at a concert.

So true.

You really can.

And like for me, just the feeling of like the music, it's like a serotonin boost that is worth whatever back pain I'm going to go home with, which I would have anyway.

Yeah, that's true.

Okay.

But also, you know what I just figured out about the concert, which I'm now not, I really don't want to like talk about it and make you, but I don't know.

This will not probably not make you that jealous.

Do you know who the opener is?

I think someone I like have recently fallen in love with.

Brandy Carlisle.

Nope.

Similar vibe.

Ashley McBride.

Yeah, that's what I mean.

They're literally the same person.

Because they both get nominated for Grammys in the country department, but they're not like that big of stars.

Yeah.

I'm Ashley McBride's number one fan, and I cannot wait.

I'm like texting the group chat.

I'm like, we have to get there at 7.15.

Like, Ashley McBride, I will not miss a second of Ashley McBride.

That'll be so great.

I'm excited for you I'm really gonna we're really gonna miss you like the energy of course will not be the same yeah without but it's like if I could do anything right now eat anything you know do anything go anywhere not like activity that you can't ski eat sushi yeah drink

I would want to go to a Luke Homes concert.

That would be my number one thing.

I'm so sorry.

It's not right.

Yeah, so it'll be okay.

I'm really happy for you guys and just make sure the stories are premium, you know?

The story.

Oh, the Instagram stories.

Yeah, of course.

Yeah, like so that we can feel like we're there if anyone else is at home.

Well, this is your reminder.

Luke Holmes is doing two nights in Madison Square Garden.

Don't miss it.

Yeah.

I'm sure it's sold out, but step up.

Okay.

So now I feel caught up personally, professionally, emotionally, physically, and also spiritually.

So let's dive right in.

I'm sorry.

No, one more thing.

I told you about this yesterday.

Ask me how my weekend was.

Oh, you guys, Claudia needs to unburden herself.

I do.

She did something embarrassing.

Claudia, how was your weekend?

It was really good until

I fell.

I fell.

Claudia has been doing this thing.

It's been happening to me for years.

Where she is like in a cool party, in the coolest place, you know, with the coolest people, and she fucking takes a tumble and like a real, like, knees on the ground.

Time to like face hit the floor.

Like, like, it's amazing I'm walking today.

How on all fours, just the pinnacle of embarrassment.

So there's many, many, many times that I've fallen, but there's three that stand out in particular.

And unfortunately, one of them happened two days ago.

So the first one, I was at a dinner party and I was like drink.

And the thing is, with all these, like, yes, I'm drinking, but I'm not wasted.

I can't stand.

I just have less inhibitions and like my big

and I'm like, just I'm a clumsy person.

So I don't want it to be like I'm stumbling all over the place.

But yes, I have had drinks.

So the first time I fell at a dinner party, I sat down and I missed my chair and I fell completely on the floor in my ass.

And it was like really embarrassing.

It's like a lot of people people were crowding around me.

Like, are you okay?

And I'm like, I'm fine.

Please don't look at me.

Like, fuck off.

Okay.

That was years ago.

That is so horrible.

The second one, which I think is the worst, but the one from Saturday might be the worst one.

When I was in Vegas like a couple months ago, I went to see Paris DJ.

And then she had like a cute little after-party dinner.

It was like in this private room.

Not a lot of people, maybe 20 people.

And this time, yeah, I was blacked out and I was wearing these huge platforms.

And I don't know, at some point in the night, I just went flying face face first like nosedive into some man's feet like and the worst part was like Ben wasn't there no one was there to help me up so I laid on the floor for like an extra second like to get my bearings because it's very shocking to fall and if Ben was there he usually just scoops me up but that the Paris one I think is the worst one I don't know who saw when I when I fall like I can't look around I can't make eye contact like I don't want I somehow think there's like a possibility that nobody saw, you know?

Yeah, well, if I was a spectator in a situation, I know people think like, oh my God, the first thing you should do is like try and help.

The best thing you can do is look away.

Yeah.

Pretend like you didn't see.

That will spare the person the most.

So then on Saturday,

I had a very, very bad fall.

I was at an after party and it was late and I had been drinking.

And I was, there was like an outdoor area and I walked from the outside to the inside and there was like this little ledge, like nothing crazy, but I was running these huge platforms.

I missed the little ledge and I went face first into the floor.

And thankfully, Ben was there.

I wasn't on the ground for more than a second before Ben scooped me up, but I was like fully laying on my back, like looking up at the party and it was terrible.

And it ruined my whole day yesterday.

All I kept thinking was like, who saw?

Like, did people see?

I was a girl who fell.

And it's a life ruiner.

And I don't know how to stop falling.

That's the thing.

Yeah, I want to like, you know, take something away from this.

Maybe it's the big shoes.

Maybe it's the drinking thing.

No, it's not either because I literally cannot wear like anything but big shoes.

Look at my shoes right now.

They're fucking huge.

Yeah.

That's just who I am.

You want me to not be who I am?

Well, if who you are is a faller, then is that who you want to be?

I just think like I need to, it just, it always hits me when I don't expect it, the fall.

So I just feel like I need to just keep it top of mind always.

But like I'm drinking, I'm talking to people.

I'm not thinking, don't fall, you know?

Yeah, no, I used to have a real fear of falling in college because you wore huge shoes.

I wore huge shoes.

And not even at night, like not even drunk falling, but like falling on the quad, like on the ice, because I was always just like not wearing the right shoes, but I was just making like a statement.

Of course.

And I was just so worried that I was going to embarrass myself so thoroughly.

And also, like, they would say, like, at Kohli, like, because it's hilly and icy, like, everybody falls.

It's my favorite.

It's a rite of passage.

And when I finally had my fall.

Was it with the bike?

No.

Oh, that's the best thing.

No, but that's a different fall.

No, this was like a fall, like, you know, in the...

near the academic buildings on the slippery slope.

And it was as good.

It was fine.

There was no one around.

I fell on my tushy there was a railing right nearby oh good guys it was it was so fine because I like overhyped it so much because it's always top of mind yeah but it will ruin your life no

falling no I know like what do I do I'm glad I just fell because now I'm not due for another fall for a little while I don't know these things they're getting closer and closer together they're like contractions it's true I'm fucked like I really and I Okay, so here's the thing.

I was walking behind my friend Gabe, and I fell behind Gabe, and I didn't see him.

And then when I saw him at the party like five minutes later, I'm like, did you see me fall?

He said, no, you fell.

And he wasn't just being nice.

He's like, I swear, I literally didn't even see you fall.

So the person in front of me didn't see him.

I know you're holding on to hope, but like his back was to you.

Fuck.

I know, but wouldn't I have like made a sound or something that would have caused him to turn around?

Was it music loud?

I don't know.

I mean, listen, you've got to forgive yourself.

I can't.

You have to move on.

I can't.

You have to move on.

Because the thing is, nobody else is thinking about it today except for you.

I don't know.

I feel like some of you are going to be able to do it.

And sometimes when embarrassing things happen,

just disassociate.

Say, that wasn't me.

That didn't happen to me.

I'm sorry to this woman.

Yeah.

No, like that, just, I, you just can't claim that action.

Yeah, it was just tough because like it ruined my whole night and I went down and I went home after, like immediately after.

Okay, so that's that.

We just got to put it to bed.

Yeah.

Just know I'm still thinking about it constantly.

Okay, I'm sorry.

It's okay.

Okay, now are you ready to jump in?

Now that you've let everyone know.

I've unburdened myself.

And I feel like the more people you tell, like the less embarrassing it is because you're not like suffering in silence.

Yeah, that's true.

It's really unburdening was the perfect word.

That's exactly what I'm doing.

The more people I tell, like the less, the less said it's my story and it's our story.

We all have to shoulder it.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

And you know, that will help me immensely, like take some of the weight of this burden off of me.

Okay.

Okay.

That's what we're here for.

So without further ado, it is time for the fast five stories that you need to know before you wake up and take a bite out of your morning toast.

And today's episode of of the morning toast is brought to you by Noom.

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They use a psychology-based approach to find healthier balance that's moldable to your life.

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Their Noom weight cognitive behavioral approach helps you better understand your relationship with food and how to be more mindful of your habits and gives you the knowledge and support you need for long-lasting change.

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And there's a lot to love about Noom, but I think the most impressive thing about Noom is when you look at their food database, it's like the most extensive

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Sometimes it can be really difficult on those random apps, but the Noom one is very streamlined.

They have the biggest database of different food options, and it's just a premium experience.

And we know a lot of people who use Noom.

I know you used it for a while.

Yes, I love Noom.

I think it's a great resource, especially as we head into the holidays.

Obviously, the holidays can be a bit of a free-for-all, and you should definitely treat yourself and enjoy.

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Sign up for your trial at noom.com slash toast.

That's n-o-o-m.com/slash toast.

Thank you, Claudia.

It's a pleasure.

Our first story, some exciting engagement news.

Lindsay Lohan announces she is engaged to Bader Shamas.

To a BB BBM.

To a businessman, Bo, BMB.

Lindsay Lohan has announced that she has engaged to her boyfriend, Bader, in a gushing post on Instagram.

The Hollywood star shared the news with her Instagram followers and posted a trio of loved up snaps.

The Smitten actress paid tribute to him and wrote alongside her photos, My Love, My Life, My Family, My Future at Bader Shamas.

Hashtag love ring emoji.

Cute.

Yeah, really cute.

She's like.

Coming back.

She's coming back.

We said that she has a new Christmas movie coming out with Cordover Street sometime soon.

So that's really exciting.

Now we're seeing love.

So you'd love to see a little personal success, professional success.

I really hope that this could be it for her.

No, it's so crazy when you think about like those, when you think of Lindsay Lowe and you think of like the it girls of the early 2000s, like Paris, Brittany, Lindsay, and like they're all settling down now.

Yeah, no, they all got engaged this year.

Yeah.

2021 was a great year for the girls.

Even though I know that Brittany and Paris, like, do not fuck with Lindsay.

I'm sure, yeah, I don't expect, they were never like best of friends.

They got into a car one night together no but like they don't like each other like yeah no but like they I don't think they were friends they were friends for sure for a time but like yeah but Paris not like Paris and Nicole no Paris went on watch Adams live a while ago and Andy was like say three nice things about Lindsay Lohan and she was like she's lame tall and something else yeah they don't get along which but I know Brittany and Paris do yeah did you see Brittany like posted on her Instagram something about Jeffree Star like I guess he sent her a ton of makeup and was like congrats because she like loves his makeup and she posted just like the collection of makeup, being like, Thank you, Jeffree Star.

I love you.

Like, I love your makeup.

She deleted it.

Like, she's now succumbed to like cancel culture.

She's now finding out what it's like to really be on Instagram.

Yeah, like, you thought you wanted to join us here on Instagram.

No, you did not.

That's disturbing.

And then, like, Jeffree Star took his Instagram and being like, you guys are bullying someone who's been in prison for 13 years, like, using the free Britney movement.

It's so messy.

I'm like not getting involved.

It's the stupidest thing ever, but it is so dumb that like she can't just post what she wants.

Like, we're really

learning.

We're canceling Britney now.

Like, leave her alone.

No,

that's called being on the internet it wasn't going to be a free ride

totally

now you can come play with all of us see what we've been going through

um i'm happy for lindsay but by the way i want to talk about christmas movies because i actually so last night i started um

One of the new Christmas movies on Netflix called A Castle for Christmas with Brooke Shields.

Oh, Brooke Shields.

Yeah, I didn't finish it, but it was like so cute.

And they just have like the most amazing budget.

The budget is unparalleled.

And then earlier this week, I watched Love Hard, which is the Heather.

The Christmas movie with Nina Dobrev and Heather McMahon.

And it was so good.

It was like funny and like it was.

How was Heather?

I've never had her act in anything.

Heather was the best part.

I'm sure.

That's literally the least surprising thing.

She's so funny.

She was so funny.

She wasn't in it enough.

Fuck.

Like, okay, it's just a start.

Yeah, but she was so, so good and so funny.

And then the rest of the movie, like, there were some really funny moments.

Who plays the man, like, love interest?

Oh, um, I don't know his name, but he was also in Crazy Rich Asians.

He was so good and funny.

Um, Jimmy O.

Yang.

Let me see.

Well, there's two love interests.

That's kind of the point.

Do you know the premise of the movie?

He's like the cousin who

likes

movies.

No.

Gotcha.

Not that I know of.

Okay.

There's two love interests.

That's the point.

Don't spoil it.

I don't want to spoil the premise, but it was a really funny premise.

It actually got me thinking about, because the premise is, and they show it in the trailer, so this isn't a spoiler.

I've seen the trailer anyway.

It's like a catfish situation.

And so she, like, really, like, was into this guy, Josh Lynn,

and they were talking for like weeks, but they hadn't met.

And then she goes to meet him, and it's not him.

And the real guy lives in the town, and she's trying to get now Josh to set her up with that guy.

Got it.

And it's like...

It really turned, for me, the catfish situation on its head, because it's like, if you got along with this person, like on every single level and you just like were disappointed in the way that they look, like that's kind of on you.

Yes, but the premise is that that person lied to you while pretending to be like open and vulnerable.

And that's what bothers people.

But yes, I agree.

It's like, oh, you're actually ugly.

Never mind.

Right.

Like, we agree about everything.

We couldn't, we have the same sense of humor.

Same interest.

You get me on every level, but you just don't look like what I wanted you to look like.

Well, so I think on the TV show, the real problem isn't that they're ugly.

The problem is that they lied.

Yeah, but what if they lied and they were much more beautiful?

Like would they be angry?

No, I totally agree.

And actually got me thinking, I have a good idea for a dating app, but then I ran it by the snitch and she said no.

Absolutely not.

But my idea is a dating app where there's no pictures.

And you get like the person's obviously like name, age, job, important facts, and then like some really in-depth questions that like really give you a sense of their personality.

And like if you saw someone on there who like you seem so simpatigo with, would you go out with them like blind?

Like love is blind the show.

I mean it's an interesting concept and I think it might be popular like with a small group of people.

No, only because, and it's terrible to say and it's just the fucked up world we live in.

Like looks matter.

Like people have people have types.

You like blondes, you like brunettes, you like, I like a dad bod.

Like everyone has their interests

and most of the time they will date within their Type.

But at the end of the day, it's what's on the inside of the I mean I agree with that and like and I feel like most people wouldn't think that at first, but everybody, like, if you were just like dating an Abercrombie model, but they didn't give you anything mentally, emotionally,

intellectually, you wouldn't stay with that.

No, we're mature, Jackie.

Like, we see that, but a lot of people, like, still don't.

Like, people are very looks-obsessed.

We live in a society that is obsessed with, like, young and skinny.

Like, we are in a looks-obsessed society, and you and I, thankfully, have risen above.

But, you know, I actually was thinking about that this morning because Ben was sleeping, and Ben has like a like a

he's gonna kill me.

I'm scared, he has like three, like they're like cute.

I wouldn't say moles, like birthmarks on his back, they're just like dots, like freckles.

And you know, I have a personal aversion to any sort of like marks, it just I have trauma from the three I used to have.

Um, but I was actually thinking while I was up at 6:30, like Ben's moles are so cute, and like I hate moles, and that's when I realized like how mature I am.

How much you love him, yeah.

Like, I would, if this was another man's back in my bed, I would have vomited.

Like, stop.

But when Ben, I was like, these are so beautiful.

We are mature.

That's the moral of the story.

Anyways, let me guys, let me know what you guys think about my app.

To the name?

No, I didn't get that far, but also, like, someone else can create it.

I'm not going to have the bandwidth to do this.

So, you're giving the free idea to someone else?

I'm giving the free idea.

I think it's a really interesting because that show, Love is Blind, like, really was the perfect example of that.

So, why not for,

why not in real life?

Why do you have to go on TV to experience that?

Yeah, no, it's true.

So, those were my thoughts, but the movie was ultimately really good.

I laughed.

I teared up a little.

I did.

I'm also extremely emotional, but I did have a tear.

And that, to me, is the makings.

Of a good Christmas movie.

I completely agree.

Of a good movie.

So, congrats to Lindsay Loham.

No.

Oh, yeah.

That's the first story.

She wasn't in that movie.

No, no, I know, but that's the first story.

Are you ready for our next story?

Sure.

Some very sad news.

Off-white designer Virgil Ablo dies at the age of 41 after privately battling cancer for two years.

So, yesterday, Virgil's Instagram account shared that, quote, We are devastated to announce the passing of our beloved Virgil Ablo, a fiercely devoted father, husband, son, brother, and friend.

He is survived by his loving wife, Shannon Ablo, and his children.

For over two years, Virgil valiantly battled a rare, aggressive form of cancer, cardiac

angioscaroma.

He chose to endure this battle privately since his diagnosis in 2019, undergoing numerous challenging treatments, all while helming several significant institutions that span fashion, art, and culture.

Oh my God, this was so surprising.

It reminded me exactly of how I felt when Chadwick Boseman died because it was the same thing, like such a young guy, top of their game, battling something privately, and nobody knew until it was over.

And it was just so sad.

And all the tributes that I've read from other people like are so kind.

It's like the nicest things you can say about a person.

And of course, every time you're writing someone, something nice about someone who's passed away, they're always really nice.

But everything I was reading, I was just very impacted by.

They were all just above and beyond talking about his kindness.

Of course, his talent, like once in a lifetime, once in a generation, talent.

Yeah, no, it was quite moving to see what everybody had to say.

But also, he really is like

the designer of our generation

has lost a great talent

from everything he did with like Louis Vuitton men's to off-white, like just he really was a fixture in the culture.

And I think we will feel his loss immensely.

Did you know that Off-White was bought by Farfetch?

No.

Because in the statement on the Off-White Instagram, it said, Off-white and Farfetch are sad to announce.

That's so interesting.

I know.

I thought that was interesting too.

Oh, my gosh.

What a great merger.

I know.

I love both of those brands.

So, and I also saw on the Louis Vuitton Instagram that they have like a show with his final collection.

Like, I will be purchasing like everything.

Good luck to you.

No, I know.

Like, how do I, how do I do it?

Like, I just, I want something from like his final collection.

You gotta maybe have a salesperson.

Yeah, I got a guy.

I got a guy.

Okay.

Well, this was really sad, very sad news.

And really surprising.

Yeah, put a cloud over yesterday for sure.

For sure.

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Are you ready for our next story?

Sure.

So a new book about the royals is coming out called Brothers and Wives Inside the Private Lives of William, Kate, Harry, and Megan by Christopher Anderson, who is a source close to the royal family.

Which part of the family?

I think the firm.

Okay.

And in this book, it says that Prince Charles is the one who asked about the skin color of Megan and Harry's baby.

Obviously, I think any of us could have guessed that.

So here's how the story goes according to the book.

Unless,

i just had a thought hmm unless if he's close to the firm that means that like the firm like maybe helped with the book or like had some approval and maybe charles is already so hated he might be abdicating like maybe they just decided to dump it on him that's all i'm saying so here's the story Here's the story, and I think this might clear some things up.

So Prince Charles was the unnamed royal who speculated about the complexion of Megan and Harry's future children, according to a new book.

The book says a source close to the royal family claims that Charles made the comment during a conversation over breakfast with his wife Camilla on the day the Duke and Duchess of Sussex's engagement was announced.

So the story is that it was two of them having breakfast.

Got it.

Charles says to Camilla, quote, I wonder what the children will look like.

Camilla was said to be taken aback somewhat by the question and noted that the child would be absolutely gorgeous.

Allegedly lowering his voice, Charles then asked, I mean, what do you suppose their children's complexion might be?

A spokesman for Prince Charles' office denied the report, saying that this is fiction and not worth further comment.

And then in an interview,

in an interview on the Today Show, the author elaborated on the claims in the book, saying that he said that Charles's comments were benign and twisted by palace courtiers.

So this was a conversation between Camilla and Charles, and it got back to Megan and Harry via a game of telephone.

Oh, because when Megan and Harry said it, I thought they had like a family meeting and someone was like, well, what's a kid's skin color going to be?

Which is awful.

This is still bad, but it's not what I thought.

Right.

So he told Hoda and Savannah on Today, the author, he said, on the morning that Megan and Harry's engagement was announced, in a very kind of benign way, Prince Charles started to muse on what their future grandchildren might look like.

And the author said, quote, I mean, here's this beautiful, biracial American woman and the world's most famous redhead.

I don't know about that.

He said, I'm a grandfather, of course.

We all do this, speculate on it, but it turned into something very toxic.

It was weaponized by the men in gray who run the palace organization.

Unfortunately, by the time it got to Harry, that's the way he took it.

And the way he took it is he said on, as he said on Oprah, that there were, quote, concerns and conversations about how dark Archie's skin might be when he's born.

You know what?

It's one of those things, like, when Harry says it, I'm like, oh.

And then when this man says it, I'm like, oh.

Like, it's just, it's a context thing, I guess.

Yes, much like a lot of things.

Yeah.

But of course, I mean, it's really hard.

And I feel this way about every single book about the royal family that comes out, like, unless they're writing it themselves.

It's like, who is writing it?

How can, like, they're so

that was even like finding freedom, which was literal propaganda beyond, but like, the whole firm is so close-lipped.

Like, I don't, I'm inclined not to believe anything, yeah.

So, I don't know, but this explanation does kind of

clears Charles a little bit, not well, not really, because also we didn't know who it was, so it was like it could have been anyone, but now it's stuck to Charles.

And yes, if you take the time to maybe watch it to this guy and maybe you agree with him then you could have a little bit of more understanding about the situation but i don't think it's good for charles yeah but i also don't think they just like put it on him because he's like uh

a dump the christmas tree oh have you been watching succession no i'm i want to scoop a little episodes and watch them while i'm on tour because what one in one is like a little you know what i scooped them and i had two to watch and it took me like two days to get through them because like i think it's the worst show show ever.

But basically,

yeah, it's so bad.

What?

Like, it has all the makings of a good show because it's on HBO and it has a really great premise.

But, like, it fucking sucks.

Like, if you told me, I watched last night the new episode.

It's like, if you told me that I could never watch another episode and I would never find out what happened, I would say, okay.

Wow, I'm shocked to hear you say that.

It's like, it's just really, everyone is so unlikable.

There's some interesting, like, dialogue moments.

Did you know that Tom Wobbsgams is Mr.

Darcy from Pride and Prejudice?

No.

Yeah, somebody put that in the Toast Facebook group.

I was shook.

I thought Mr.

Darcy was...

No, that can't be.

No, I'm telling you.

Hold on.

Maybe on like some, maybe in his high school play.

No.

Matthew McFaden

and Matthew McFaden, Mr.

Darcy.

Yeah.

Oh my God.

How crazy.

Yeah, look at this.

I see.

I see.

Oh, my God.

Isn't that the craziest shit ever?

That's twisted.

I fucking hated this

Pride and Prejudice.

I don't even know where like where we're at in succession, so it's not,

this isn't a spoiler or anything, but they call Tom the Christmas tree because everyone's going to hang their orange, their

primes on him.

You know, that's literally Charles.

And if he ends up like being skipped, which I don't even know if that's possible, like it would all make sense, you know?

He really took one for the team after all he's done.

It's the least he could do.

Yeah.

Yeah, we'll see.

And William is just like so primed and like ready.

Where Refrin is ready.

The country is ready.

Like the kids are ready.

They're all set up.

Like, there's literally no need for Charles.

Like, if Charles mysteriously disappears in the next couple of years, that's why.

Yeah, it's really, it's never been done.

And the royal experts say that it's not even a fucking possibility.

So don't even think about it.

But it's crazy because everyone's thinking about it.

But it's like the monarchy is on its last.

They can't handle much more.

And they need a rejuvenation of excitement.

A

modernization.

They really do.

They need to do something drastic.

And I think that that's the perfect solution because I think think the country, I mean, I don't fucking know, but I think people really like William and Kate and would be excited to

usher them in.

But it's also just bizarre the sentiment on the royal family here versus in the UK.

Like whenever I talk to someone British, like they love the family, they love the firm.

They love Willie and Kate.

And here, like, there's...

People are find it very problematic and they're very much siding with Harry and Megan in America.

That's why they fled here.

Like, they're the royals here.

Yeah.

Yeah.

It's, I don't know.

I don't know.

I guess I'm just like an anglophile.

Totally.

You're such a royalist.

But I do sometimes like feel like a francophile.

So, is that the right word?

Yeah, you love France.

Yeah, it's hard for me because I'm such an anglophile and such a francophile.

Oh, maybe you're just a lover of tings.

I think I'm a tingophile.

I'm definitely a tingophile.

And I just think I'm a lover of the world.

A global citizen.

A globophile.

A globophile, yes.

Okay, are you ready for our next story?

Some exciting news for TikTok.

Kim Kardashian and Northwest have launched a joint TikTok account at Kim and North.

It is racked up more than 130,000 followers.

Oh, you're reading an old article.

They're at almost 2 million.

Oh my God.

Well, that was in less than 24 hours, and now they're at 2 million.

And most notably for me, was that they did the Easy on Me challenge, which we were joking about.

Well, this is an extension.

We covered last week on the Patreon that P and Courtney had.

We didn't.

We talked about how P got busted.

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

But the account is back up, run by Courtney.

And then I guess because Penelope's mom let her do it, North asked her mom, and then Kim and North made one, and they're both doing pretty much like the same content, like really poorly edited, like aesthetic videos of like them just being rich, and sometimes their parents popping in.

Pea is working hard on her account, though.

She got Scott in it.

I think she got like Travis in one.

She got

Alabama Barker in one.

She got like Courtney and Travis in one in the background.

She's smart.

She's using her surroundings to build her image, and we love that.

I think that while I'm happy for Pea and that she's had this, she's found this outlet, like I think that North being like the creative mind that she is, like it's just gonna explode.

I think this is gonna be such a great

vessel for her to express herself.

She's definitely,

just in my TikTok opinion, she definitely has some more work to do than Penelope on the editing front.

Like pretty much everything North posts like isn't in focus and it's really frustrating.

Maybe that's like an aesthetic.

An aesthetic choice.

It's possible, but I just think P has been doing it a little bit longer.

She went, like, undetected on TikTok for like a week, and then it blew up, but she had had a lot of videos on before that where nobody knew who she was.

So I just think she's got a little bit more experience than North.

And North could really use like a tutor because

she's like, she did this video.

I think she was making her bed.

Like, so they went to Palm Springs.

And, you know, they have that bunk bedroom for all the cousins to be in at Chris's house.

So she was like making her bed for an hour on this TikTok, like zooming in on the pillow, like touching the blanket, lifting the blanket, lifting the blanket back.

It was like pretty torturous.

Interesting.

Yeah, well,

I think she's gonna do great things.

Yeah, I mean, their followings are growing.

Like, is this the start of the Kardashian kids like becoming influencers?

I think it's too early.

Yeah, no, there's so much more runway.

I would, I think it's just them having a good time.

I hope, yeah.

And I love seeing Kim on the talk.

Like, that's a true

she's like dancing, which we know she does.

She doesn't do.

And it's just funny to watch her dance, knowing that she hates it.

It's just funny, also, like, when you go on Instagram, you go to Kim's Instagram, you get like business, Instagram, business, Kim, business, business, business.

And this TikTok version of Kim is like mom, Kim, and it's really sweet.

It is sweet.

She's a great mom.

Yeah.

She lets the kids do what they want and they want TikTok.

And she'll dance, like, she won't dance for anyone else.

She will dance for a prince, but she'll dance for North.

Chigs.

Jaggie.

Simpson.

Patiko.

Euratico.

Hypnotico.

Are you ready for our fifth and final story?

Someone doesn't look ready.

Yeah, which way?

It's been so long since I do the show.

Do we usually do triangles, then ads, or ads, and then triangles?

Oh,

well, it looks like we're doing triangles, then ads.

It's the final story.

Mr.

Darcy

is is Tom Womsgs.

And that's a magic number.

That's really the craziest factoid I've heard in like all year.

No, I know.

And I remember watching Pride and Prejudice as a kid, and first of all, hating it.

And second of all, thinking like that guy was like Fallin Firth.

I'm like, it should have just been played by Amanda Byn's dad.

I remember thinking that so clearly.

Like the guy from

What a Girl Wants totally should have been Mr.

Darcy.

And this guy was like a like a cheap knockoff hallmark version of Colin First.

Yeah.

And now that he's re-entered my life in this way,

I'm besmirched.

I don't even know if that's the right word.

I think it is.

I'm besmirched.

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It's a pleasure.

Our fifth and final story is some crazy book-related news.

The man accused of raping Lovely Bones author Alice Siebold has his conviction overturned.

Okay, I read this this morning.

I told you, I don't know if I mentioned it.

I was up at 6.30.

I was shocked, and I have a lot of questions because I read the article and it didn't answer.

Is this the case from the book or this happened to her after?

Not Lovely Bones.

She also wrote Lovely Bones.

This is not about Lovely Bones.

Okay, okay, she just happens to be the author.

Yes, she wrote a book in 1999, a memoir called Lucky, and it was about her sexual assault, which happened to her.

She wrote that a stranger beat and raped her in a tunnel in Thornden Park near Syracuse University when she was a freshman there.

And months later, she saw the man on the street in the city who reminded her of her rapist, and she reported the encounter to the police.

She later wrote about how she failed to identify the authorities suspect for her rape in a police lineup, but prosecutors later used her account and microscopic hair analysis, which 35 years later was deemed faulty, as evidence.

And then this man, Anthony Broadwater, was charged with forcible rape.

Alice testified at his trial.

So what's she testified on his behalf or against him?

Against him,

but he wasn't the man that she picked out in the lineup.

What's so crazy about this story that in 2019, it was reported that Lucky was going to be turned into a movie.

And earlier this year, the executive producer who was working on the movie noticed discrepancies between the memoir and the script.

He told the New York Times, I started having some doubts, not about the story that Alice told about her assault, which was tragic, but the second part of her book about the trial, which didn't hang together.

And so this started like this shame

reaction.

And now a judge has overturned the conviction.

But he was in jail for 16 years.

Anthony Broadwater, yes.

So, okay, just I'm still confused.

On her part, like, so

say it again with the lineup.

Okay, so she

picked someone out of a lineup who wasn't ultimately the person who was sent to jail, but the prosecutors, I guess,

influenced her choice.

But the guy she saw on the street is this guy?

Is this guy, but not the person who did it.

She picked out of the lineup.

Yeah.

And not the person who did it.

And we don't know where he is.

No.

But she testified that this was the man.

Yeah, because I guess that's who she thought or what she thought.

I don't know.

I didn't know that.

A very bad story.

I don't like it.

Yeah, no, I never read the book Lucky, but it was like obviously a huge book, and it was going to be turned into a movie.

Was it after she wrote The Lovely Bones or before?

I think before because this came out in 1999, and Lovely Bones was 2002.

Got it.

Yeah.

So just a really, really crazy story.

Yeah.

Very sad.

Very sad.

Like, obviously, great justice was served, but he was also in prison for 16 years.

Like, you can't get that time back.

And that shit's just not okay.

Yeah, exactly.

So, are they still making it into a movie?

I feel like it's like enough.

I don't know.

Now, the movie has another twist.

Oh, that's true.

A sequel.

Like,

this is a terrible story.

Yeah.

Really, Pittsville.

Yeah, majorly Pittsville.

And I wonder, like,

what is her explanation?

She hasn't said anything.

Right.

I'm sure she will.

Yeah, I think that the man was looking, hoping for perhaps an apology from

the disebled.

So we'll see what happens.

Oh, terrible.

Well, those are the fast life stories.

And I feel as though you need to know that.

Yeah, I do.

I really, really do.

And the show's not even far from over because we have so much TV to talk about.

Yes.

I think we should just get out of the way selling sunset.

That's like what everyone watches week.

Season four or five, whatever.

Can't keep up.

Is on.

There's also like another season coming that they have footage for because like Jason and What's Her Face Are together, but like we didn't get any of the Jason Chrischelle hits.

Stupid, we didn't get anything.

We didn't get anything, though.

I did feel like there were a few moments of crumbs where it's like, okay, Jason's in love with her.

I think they did that intentionally.

Like every time like Chrische was talking, they would show Jason like when she was flirting with that Marvel guy in the office and Jason was like getting all angry.

Like they were toying with us, but they ultimately gave us nothing.

Yeah.

So the season.

I really don't even know where to start because I think it was one of the worst seasons of TV I've watched in a really long time, which is just so shocking because I think that, like, they don't really have to do much to keep me entertained.

Like, the houses are beautiful, the women are beautiful, the editing is great, it's like a gorgeous LA.

The way that this, I watched 10 episodes about the same thing, and I didn't get any of the women together until the last episode was like reality TV faux pas.

No, it was really atrocious.

Um, every conversation was about like the conversation before, and the one before that, and the next one that's coming up.

Well, then I had lunch, which is having lunch.

My worst

thing I hate most about reality TV.

I understand that sometimes we have to like keep the ball moving, but it was the only thing that was happening.

There were no like organic moments that happened.

I think that we've all realized that this show is very much manufactured in the sense that, like, these women probably don't work for the Oppenheim Group sell real estate, but like you put a bunch of interesting women in a room together, and shit's gonna start popping off.

So, I'm fine with that, but it was just nothing, nothing happened.

The only thing that we're talking about is something that happened five years ago.

And I'm having a hard time even believing that that even happened.

Because what are the odds that the man that Christine's boyfriend was, the woman that Christine's boyfriend was cheating on her with also works at the Oppenheimer group.

Also works at the Oppenheim group and everybody knows her except, but this was Christine's first time ever seeing her.

Yeah.

So I feel like they made up that whole situation.

And then so Christine made up some more on her own side.

So here, like when it boils down, if I really have to get into the weeds and like cheat and dissect this idiocy, which I was just so uninvested, I don't even care to to have an opinion.

But if I had to, my opinion would be this.

Christine is acting very bizarre and her story is not adding up.

Like she said, the real like

kink in the armor was when she said, like, Davina, I was friends with Davina.

She knew I was engaged.

And then Davina was like, nah, if Davina's not even backing you up, like, you're fucked.

So I think that, like, she's definitely making some shit up, and she's really not interested in being friends with these girls.

And she acted very bizarre.

And I really couldn't get behind her.

But more than that, I couldn't get behind the massively loser energy that was just radiating from Mary, radiating from Crochelle, radiating from Heather.

Like the way Christine, who they claim to despise, is living so rent-free in their minds makes me actually have a lot of sympathy for these enormous losers.

Like, so for me, I know everyone was so focused on Christine being like caught in her lies, and I see that, but I raise you, the loseriest losers who ever losered.

No, the loseriest losers, and you know what?

I actually, the season weirdly made me like Heather more than I've liked her in the past.

God, that is so weird that you said that because I was actually like really vibing on Heather.

Like, I just was liking her energy.

And even when she was with the loser brigade, she was being the least bit of a

least bit of a loser.

Like, Mary and Chris are obsessed with Christine.

There needs to be like the Bechdil test for the show, like, the Quinn test.

Is there people on the show who are not Christine Quinn?

Yes.

Do they ever have a conversation where Christine Quinn is not mentioned?

No.

Fails the fucking test.

Not once do they get together and they do not bring up Christine.

It's crazy.

loser.

And it's just so crazy how like Chris Shell is like everyone's queen when it's like, I think her, like, and even all the vibe in the office, and I understand where Christine is like coming from, where it's like everybody just sits there being so fucking fake with their fake laughs and their fake smiles, like with fake girl boss women empowerment.

And it's like so cringy and not authentic.

And then they accuse Christine of being not authentic.

I'm like, at least she tells you how she feels.

Like you guys just like sit around being fraudulent.

Being fraudulent, just wanting to like come off well on TV or whatever.

Yeah, but it's like it's so cringe the way they talk to each other in the office.

Like those aren't real conversations.

That's not

real talk human interaction.

And the way like they're just so like sing-song-y the whole time.

And then they're like, go bitch, boss, babe.

Like that is my least favorite.

No, and I think Crochelle really said it best.

Empowered women empower women.

No, it's like...

I could die.

I could vomit.

Like, it's a parody.

Empowered women don't say that.

Empowered women don't talk about being empowered.

They just are.

It's a parody of like feminism and girl power.

And

it's cringe-tastic.

I can't believe there are people out there who are like inspired by this.

No, and you know what?

I really have had enough.

And I don't think I can really ever watch a TV show ever again that Mary is on.

She is a disgrace.

She's the worst dressed woman on the planet.

And it's only highlighted more because everyone, even Davina brought it up a notch, like everyone is just sickening that girl.

Emma, like outfit, outfit, outfit.

Heather looks so cute all the time.

Christine, outfit, outfit, outfit.

Chrischelle looks great, really professional.

Mary is like shopping at a different store.

And you know what?

It's just something about Mary.

Like, there's something about Mary.

Because when they went to that fashion showroom and I literally walked out in the same dress.

Oh, they were going to two different places.

Like, literally, what's her name?

Chrischelle was going to the Oscars.

She looked so great in it.

And Mary was going to the the diner.

Like, Mary just, like, cheapens everything.

And then when she starts to talk, it like is so much worse.

I'm sorry.

I'm really going off.

No, I can't stand her.

She's a bully, too.

And when all these girls, they just cry and like make, and Christine was doing that too, like, just crying and making us.

And there's something weird about like seeing Christine cry.

Do you agree?

Like,

it's just not adding up.

So I need to go back to Mary at the

Albright Library because she's surrounded by gorgeous, gorgeous, gorgeous things.

Pick out uglier things, Mary.

I dare you.

Couldn't be uglier.

But that scene of her and Chris, like when they both put on the metallic dresses and they were talking about how they were super women and what would our superpowers be, I don't think there's a cringier moment in television history.

Like, and I'm sorry, but if that,

if that scene warmed your heart or made you feel like warm and fuzzy, look inward.

I was literally

dying of cringing

the only time they didn't talk about Christine and they they were literally.

I wish they would have.

It was cringeness 2.0.

Like, it was a great thing.

No, they did.

If she's coming to the party tonight.

Oh, yeah, they did talk about the Christian.

Thanks.

And by the way, what the two of them wound up actually wearing to the party, there's no way they got it from fucking Patricia Fields' warehouse right there.

Totally.

They looked really not great.

They all looked stupid running around that house.

The fashion this season, like, honestly, amazing.

Emma was.

She was giving us so much.

Barbie.

Christine gives us everything.

I agree.

Chrischelle has her sense of style.

That's super cute.

Heather, too.

Mary, not so much.

Amanda always looks great.

Yes.

And oh my God, what a crazy shit that's going on with Amanda.

First of all, I don't even think she set foot in like one house.

Like she didn't work.

She wasn't

selling.

She was doing interior design and also dealing.

That was the craziest thing.

Like how he just literally sent a letter and was like, I give up all legal rights to my kids so he didn't have to pay child support.

Like that's so sad.

Crazy.

She's a really good mom.

I actually really like her, especially because she's like the only one who's like somewhat in the middle.

Yeah, and that she like i so christine up until this season and still the season like this is my absolute favorite on the show before this season i was like christine conduner christine's a queen this season i'm like she's making it hard for her fans to defend her because like what the is this story yeah um but i still would i'm still team christine over all of the other women they are so obsessed with her it's crazy and they're nothing but themselves and they can't take her like they were like well we want to speak to you as a group which is obviously not a fair right because they don't want her to get away with her lies but like okay speak to her one-on-one and call her out on her lies.

But that's not why they want to speak to her.

Like, that's just a lie they made up.

They just want to speak to her all together so that they can be ganged up.

When they were in the car, they were like, we have each other's backs.

Like, it's easy to talk to anyone, even the most person who hasn't done anything wrong, if it's three against one.

Right.

And it's like, they don't realize this.

And I'm sure I feel like a lot of people don't feel this way.

I know I'm in the minority here, but like they are the mean girls.

Whenever it's everyone against one person and one person feels alienated.

And even like Christine, I feel like eventually she lets her walls down.

It's like, do you know how hard it is to walk into a room where everyone hates you?

She did it so many times this season and was like so, you know, I guess fake and like smiley.

And hi, everyone, how are you?

Giving everyone hugs.

But like, that fucking sucks.

And yes, she did.

But also, I wish they would be more specific about what Christine did to the other women.

Yeah.

Like, so we know that, we know she said some shit about Tarek, you know, in the cupcakes, whatever.

Yeah, called the relationship like stupid.

When Chris says that she tried to like ruin her reputation, ruin her as a person at the time when her parents were both passed away.

What is she talking about?

I don't know.

No, we need that.

They needed to be more specific because I couldn't sympathize if I don't know the crime.

It makes it seem like you're just like making stuff up.

The thing is, it's like, I don't really ride or die for Christine anymore, like not close to how much you do.

And I don't think she's necessarily in the right.

I just refuse to be on the side of the three biggest losers in the history of television.

Therefore, by the transitive property, it makes me Team Christine.

Yes, and I will say, in order of loseriness, it goes

to the very one.

Mary Christine Emma.

No, no, Chris.

That's what I meant.

Yeah, Mary, Chris, Emma, and then I would put...

Heather.

Heather, but she really didn't bother me.

Until the end, she like stormed down and like had a moment, and Tarek is like so trying to make something happen.

Like, it's fine.

She's an idiot.

Like, she's just like...

Calm down, Tarik.

But I do think Heather and Tarek are matchmade in heaven.

100%.

They seem really happy.

Happy for them.

I'm happy for them.

And it definitely changed my POV about them.

I wish them a lifetime of love.

I agree.

Even now I really understand Heather's mindless news.

Like it, it's really, I think, just like what they do on a daily basis, like dumb things.

You know, and they're so excited about like little things that they're doing together and they just want to share it.

I'm totally fine with them.

So that was a turning point for sure.

But just even Emma, who I thought was going to come in and like be really cool as a person, just went on the loser train, choo-choo.

Choo-choo, bringing her empanadas everywhere.

And I did look up her vegan food company because she acted like she was super successful.

Of course, she's skinny girl.

And I just want to let you know, she's not.

I just wanted to clear the air for everyone.

She's not super successful.

And of course, like, she has to say that she flies private because she needs to take her big dog with her.

But there was a dog birthday party and she didn't even bring him.

And that to me just like didn't add up.

It's also a TV show.

Like, she's not flying private.

First of all, like, even if your vegan food company is really successful, like, do you know how expensive it is to fly from Boston to LA multiple times a month?

It's like 50 grand every time.

I'm sorry, she's just not doing that.

Yeah, also, when Mary like had a conniption that Christine Mary is just erratic.

When she had a conniption that Christine came to the dog party

and acting like a lunatic Christine was so well behaved and then when the two of them are at the all-bright closet and they're like well maybe if Christine comes she could be drama free and they're like has she ever been every single time Christine showed up this season

there was no fucking drama it was just like Mary and Chris spinning their wheels oh you know who like got on TV and got like a little empowered Christine's husband He's like, they're just jealous, babe.

Like, you're married.

They're divorced.

They wouldn't dream of taking trips like we do on our weekends.

Like,

i was just kind of like it was also really weird that they had that conversation in the middle of the street yes like you guys have a house that's beautiful and quiet and people go and if you want to talk shit do it there it's crazy how frequently people in la just move yeah and actually chriselle's house that she ended up getting is really nice like it's on this canyon yes and i'm happy i'm so happy for chris that she has a place of her own it's a wonderful thing like to to be able to own a home without anyone being able to take it away.

That part I actually liked.

Yeah.

She became every episode just like losery and loserier and loserier and loser somebody lied the whole world is lying to her and and but people really feel this way about her where she's like that

and i really every season i was like you know what chris gonna have an amazing season like she's such a big star dancing with the stars she looks amazing she's like you know she's moved on from her heartbreak and she's in this like new season of her life and she was still a big loser and i'm i just can't i can't either like it was there was so much cringe so much cringe and the way she acts around celebrities like

it's inappropriate actually like for the workplace but i do i could see how jason is in love with her i was definitely with editing but i was like okay

also that guy from marvel was in love with her and the basketball player right and she should have gone out with the guy from marvel and also the basketball player was really hot she should have gone out with him too yeah Maybe she did.

Yeah.

But she's very flirty, touching.

And I was like, I don't think this is appropriate realtor conduct.

No, and like, are you really supposed to hug your realtor every time you see them?

100%.

I don't even like to like hug you every time I see you like it's really weird yeah no there was a lot of hugging a lot of inappropriate like workplace conduct especially in the pandemic especially on behalf of crochet yeah i agree but like they're just like a hugging bunch over there totally and oh my god the shoes like i don't like how they walk around these houses and these all these houses in la they're like ice castles like they're not warm there's no carpet it's like hard corners and hard marble stairs four flights flights and flights of stairs i'm like and they're walking the craziest shoes and you know what like davina's been trying to keep up with the looks.

Like, she obviously went to Stourettes and like bought those like tweed-looking dresses that everyone got, but she could not walk in heels.

Have you noticed that about her?

Like, she's trying so hard to keep up.

She physically cannot.

Yeah.

Oh, wait.

We didn't even talk about Christine, the pregnancy, and the rumors that she faked it.

I really don't like to entertain, like, conspiracy theories like that.

Like, it's moronic and offensive.

And...

I don't think she faked her pregnancy.

I don't think she faked her pregnancy either.

I think that, and people, even if she didn't fake her pregnancy, people are like upset with her that she's like, you know, putting out this like standard of postpartum that is just so fucking unattainable.

But it's like, I feel like, and I'm pregnant right now, and I love seeing Christine two days out of labor, like walking down the street,

like head to toe, and because that's really what she did.

And like, I feel like I see so many realistic portrayals of what postpartum actually is, whether it's on Instagram or like on TV, movies, books.

Like, you know, that it's really very

unfabulous.

But it is kind of cool to see this like person who really is just having this incredibly fabulous experience.

I know that's not going to be me, but like it gives you a little.

It's inspiration.

It's hopeful.

Yeah.

I mean, I...

I did not find it offensive whatsoever.

No, me neither.

And I mean, I'm not pregnant, so I don't know what it's like, but like, also, like, that's really what we're arguing about.

Like, there's much bigger problems in the world.

It's really, like, it's crazy.

And also, she really did work out like through her entire pregnancy.

She was eating Pilates literally a week before she gave birth.

Like, if that person...

is gonna be perfect after they give birth

if that's what it takes yeah i won't be doing that.

Right.

And that's why I won't look anything like that.

Right.

But I really, like, I found it to be so interesting to just watch her postpartum journey be so radically different

from anyone else on earth.

It looked tiring.

I just wish, like, the heels she would cool it with.

When she was super, super pregnant, like walking around like town in those shoes, it's actually giving me terrible anxiety.

Like one snap of the ankle, so dangerous.

Yeah, I agree.

But that's Christine.

She was literally on psychotic level

this season.

Yeah, she was.

Also, the Real Housewives of Potomac finale was last night, and Nicki Minaj joined us.

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Amazing.

So Nikki wrapped it up last night.

She was like coming hard and like dying on random hills.

Yeah, they weren't my hills.

No, and I just thought it was weird because like, okay, she was, first of all, I thought the conversation about michael sexuality, which like, of course, I think a lot of people wonder, was just like really inappropriate to have right in front of Ashley.

And it was like kind of fucking rude.

And I just didn't like it.

I agree.

And I just felt like with every woman, she like poked and prodded at the worst thing.

Like,

that's not what we we needed you here like to be our voice and you're just like talking about random shit yeah a Giselle and Robin being lovers that's so

stupid like so stupid I agree I liked her presence I liked her energy and I love how much she loves the show dearly and knows everything that has happened but it's just I didn't feel like she was speaking for me she wasn't speaking facts and also because like she got this position because of you know justice for Monique and it wasn't mentioned no but that scene with Candace singing, like, was truly painful.

First of all,

the fact that she was so hesitant and like wouldn't sing her own song was so bizarre.

So bizarre because she has, we hear her singing.

She's an amazing voice.

She sings on the show, happy birthday.

Like, oh my God, no one could have a birthday without Candace singing.

I think that I'm the Candace of the Morning Toast.

And of course, if Nikki Minaj was like, sing toast by Claude Atri, like, I would die and I would feel so awkward.

I probably wouldn't do great.

But I wouldn't say no.

Yeah.

It was weird.

Like, I was just weirded out.

And then she did did it.

She didn't sound amazing.

She sounded decent, but she was obviously really nervous.

So she was a little pitchy, but it was fine.

My God, is Chris Bassett such a fucking drama queen or what?

Like coming in?

What?

You're mad at Nikki Minaj?

Do you think she fucking cares?

Right.

It was, that was a weird moment.

But it was actually nice of Andy to come over.

Yeah.

Because like Nikki really did put her on the spot and she was visibly uncomfortable and like Nikki doesn't care.

No.

And like it was painful for everyone.

And I can imagine it was actually really painful to be there.

And I thought it was cool that like Andy came over and like congratulated her and was like, calm down, you're going to be fine.

Yeah.

And at the end of the day, like you performed for Nikki Minaj.

Like how many people can say that?

Once in a lifetime.

I agree.

It really, I was so excited for Nikki's presence.

And then it just, it didn't give me what I needed just because

she was going off on things that really didn't bother me.

No, and like she just chose like one or two issues with every woman.

And like I didn't even notice half the shit that they were talking about.

Like she was just.

like going on tangents about the most irrelevant things.

Like I wanted her to go with Candace, like really talking about her anger and the common denominator, the Monique of it all.

Like, I would have loved Nikki's take on that.

I would have loved Nikki's take on, like, Wendy being so rehearsed this season, like, with her weird TikTok

Zen Win.

Like, I would have loved Nikki to go in on her.

I also thought Nikki, like, paid a lot of respect to Karen and put Giselle a little in her place.

Like, it's like enough already with the age jokes, like, you're obsessed with Karen.

Yeah.

And Karen was the only one who didn't really get anything bad from Nikki, which made the whole thing worth it.

Yeah, I agree.

It was nice to see respect, justice for Karen, at least, if we can't get it.

Oh, and you know, Karen got a spin-off with her family.

Oh, exciting.

Did you know that?

I don't think so.

Yeah, Karen got a spin-off.

And also, last night, Porsche, her show, She Got a Spinoff After Atlanta, premiered.

There wasn't a lot of promo for it, but I watched it.

It was very good.

Oh, exciting, exciting, exciting.

You'd love to see who gets a spin-off and who doesn't.

It's like the most interesting game in the world.

Yes, but ultimately, like, I'm glad that Nikki showed up and that that was something that we got to to see.

You know, I

would like, I'm open for more in the future with other major celebrities who are big fans of a franchise.

Please do not overdo it.

Do not ruin a good thing because it was just like a fun, exciting thing that happened.

And even though I didn't, like, feel like I got what I needed, what I needed, it was something new.

And that's so great.

And we were a part of something.

We were.

And it was like exciting.

Yeah, it was.

So I told you, but Mia was just all over.

I know.

I really was like rooting for her at the beginning of the season.

And then it got so hard to root for her.

and I was thinking to myself I'm like why am I rooting for this person like yeah I'm getting nothing from it no she's like she's insane yeah she really is and then when she was like oh by the way like the scene where where Nikki was like asking um Candace about like how many drops I mean how many albums she sold and Nikki Nikki was like you sold 500,000 like Adele's album just now had 622,000, which is the biggest this year.

Like, so Candace, you're telling me like your song got 500,000 purchases?

And even 20,000 is a lot.

Yeah, but I think that that was the real number.

And that's a really good number.

Yeah.

Yeah.

That conversation made me want to die.

Yeah, but I thought Candace actually handled it pretty well.

Yeah.

Considering it on the spot, like you could just tell who Nikki liked and who she didn't like.

She doesn't like Candace.

She likes Karen.

I think she likes Robin and Giselle.

She doesn't like Ashley.

No, what the hell?

Oh, man, that was crazy.

She likes Wendy.

Yeah.

See, that's why I just didn't agree.

Yeah, agreed.

Okay, so I told you about the Jonas Brothers, Rose.

Like, please do not waste your time.

I'm going to watch it.

First of all, they advertised, like, all these comedians, Gabriel Iglesias.

Gabriel Iglesias was not in it.

He was in, like, a little stupid, like, clip in the credits.

Basically, like,

the flow of the night was like, some people came out and roasted.

Like, Lily Singh came.

That was a, that was a tough one.

Priyanka did a pretty good job.

Sophie did, like, an okay job.

Danielle Jonas, like, all the wives did it, but then, like, Danielle Jonas was, like, had a bunch of cue cards up.

And she was like, I lost my voice.

And then she roasted him on the cue cards.

But, like, obviously she just is like nervous because she's like not a performer she's not an entertainer and it's like in front of like a big crowd of like 100 people overall it was just so stupid like there would be a roast and then they'd cut to like a package you know so they did this thing with like you know joe and niles warren did like undercover soul cycle moronic kevin did you know football training at the rams so fi stadium moronic like

There was so little roasting, like traditional stand-up roast.

Some of it was good.

They had this British comedian I never heard of, Jack Whitewall or something.

Hilarious.

That was Pete Davidson when he made that one funny joke.

Yeah, that was it.

Like, that's literally the extent of his time on the thing.

Yeah, there's nothing.

It's like he was so good.

And he's at the beginning.

So me and Ben were like so excited.

He left, comes back for one tiny little segment.

That's it.

Oh, my God.

So it was just, and then John Legend came and like roasted in a song, which was like a cute idea.

But no, like, none of it was working.

I was really surprised.

Damn.

I'm still going to watch it, but I guess my expectations have been lowered.

Yeah, they should.

And overall, like my takeaway is like Joe is still my favorite.

Okay, I'll let you hear what I think.

Then Kevin, then Frankie, then Nick.

You watch anything else?

Yes.

No.

I read Golden Girl by Ellen Hildebrandt, the book you raved about.

And I liked it.

I mean, now that I've really sat with it, I thought it would be more on my mind.

And like, it's not.

I agree with that.

It's not on my mind.

Because it was this kind of like deep book about like the afterlife.

And I loved that part of it.

I thought it was like really like a nice

way of thinking about like people who have passed away, how like you know they're not really worried about you or like in pain.

They're just like at peace.

I loved that.

But you know, my biggest complaint with the book was that it was unbelievably long.

And I was actually texting with Raquel Moffs and we owe every book you recommend to me, I recommend to her and she loves your recommendations by the way.

That's so good.

She just did, it happened one summer.

I told her, I'm like, it's a little pornographic.

She said, it's fine.

So then I was like, I read Golden Girl by Ellen Hildegrandt.

I think you would like it.

But like, it is really long, like pages and pages of descriptions, just walking into a restaurant.

Okay.

And she's like, I can't do it.

Like I, that, it's my deal breaker.

Like I can't.

So now I'm looking back on the book with like hatred in my eyes just because it took up so much of my time.

But like it also was a good book.

Like the plot twits, like it was great.

The concept was great.

But now I like, I just have like hate in my heart for it.

Got it.

The way that I feel is I do think it was too long and it could have been shorter, but I was enjoying it so much and I haven't really been so into a book in so long that it was like, why would I want this to end?

Yeah.

Let's keep going.

i know but even like on the best book in the world like all good things must end yeah but i it was my favorite ellen hildebrand book that i've ever read and i read the whole winter in paradise series we read perfect couple which is so good is that the wedding one that's the wedding one i loved that one i liked it better i read 28 summers i think that's what i'm gonna read next I like this one the best and I would recommend it to everyone.

But speaking of books, we just recorded our final Redheads episode of the year.

We read The Midnight Library by Matt Haig, and I'm just gonna give you a little spoiler, which was that all four of us loved it.

Oh, Oh, good.

It was so good.

A Dana's choice.

It was a Dana's choice, and obviously, she always hits it out of the park.

So, not only do we recap the book, but it was a book also about the afterlife.

So, just really interesting, thought-provoking discussions about parallel universes and like what happens when

we go and every decision that you make in life, how it affects, like, the rest of your life.

Where would you be if you know I didn't go on that teen tour?

That's what Martha in the book helps you with.

Right.

It's actually quite similar, but The Midnight Library is shorter.

It's well, I like it.

I think that you would.

It's a if snitch it liked it so if snitch liked it i think you would like it it's written perfectly like every there's not a wasted sentence love that every sentence is packed with meaning anyways we recap that book and then we do our 2021 year in review of books we each give our fave top three redheads books of the year and top three non-redheads books of the year was my book this year it was technically yeah right okay But it was also in like the poll.

Oh, that was March Madness.

That was, yeah, that was all Redheads books.

Got it.

So this was just 2021 things that we read

get included in your reading you know we didn't mention

because i read it in 2020 like to me it's yeah when i went through my good reads i've i rated it in 2020 so it's satisfying

yeah but i actually should have because i was coming up short with like what to make i didn't know anyways girlwithnojob.com slash book And there's a Redheads episode about that.

Anyways, new episode of The Redhead shops on Thursday.

It's literally so long.

If you don't want to read the book and don't want to, you can listen.

We recap the book, or you can skip to the 2021 year-in-review part because

I think we got a delicious.

It looks like we have a delivery that's so delicious.

Anyways, we just talk about all the books that we read this year, all of the best books of the year, and it's really good.

Ooh,

we just got like a sickening delivery.

Okay, get back here.

Give me mine.

This is the Tim Hortons Justin Bieber collab.

Tim Biebs, you see?

Tim Bitts is what they call their munchkins.

Is there any food in here?

Yeah.

Oh, fuck yes.

I know you guys love how us eating and getting.

Ooh, what is this?

There's also, oh, a pouch.

It's their munchkins.

It's okay, so do you know Tim Hortons?

Yes, I do.

It's like the Dunkin' Donuts of the North.

Of the North.

What flavor is that?

It's like birthday cake with stuff on it.

Do you think Haley eats these?

Yeah.

Oh, they're all the same flavor.

And there's also so much.

Oh my god, they smell so good.

Hold on.

We'll like them.

Oh, a fanny pack.

Oh, my God.

This is so good.

You know, birthday cake is like my favorite flavor.

This is so cool.

Is it a fanny?

Did you know we were getting this?

No.

How'd they get the address?

No.

That is so bizarre.

Did you get them?

No.

I think you did.

I swear to God, I did not.

Well, thank you.

Thanks, Justin.

Well, I'm done.

Are you done?

I'm done.

That's our show, you guys.

Thank you so much for listening to the Morning Toast Milana Morning Show,

where we deliver the fast five stories that you need to know every Monday through Friday on YouTube.

So if you're watching this on YouTube, please feel free to subscribe and give this video a thumbs up.

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Wherever you listen to podcasts, find us more in Toastleton 5's RV about our beautiful Sundays, Mario R.

Love you guys.

We'll see you tomorrow.

Bye.