S4 Ep182: A Sneaky Brown Noser With A Hidden Agenda: Wednesday, October 20th, 2021

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Good morning, millennials.

Welcome back to the morning toast.

Happy Wednesday.

Happy hump day.

Do not forget.

I know it's easy to forget, but do not forget to hump someone you love today.

It's especially easy to forget today since neither do nor brew are here.

Today I had like a a feeling of maybe bringing brew but you know it's just so much work and i had to oh you're telling me no but do is a full-grown adult still so much work he takes himself to work he packs his briefcase it's still back he brings his lunch it's backbreaking brew it's like a little baby i'm coming up on my one year anniversary of brew's homecoming your one year bra anniversary my one year bra anniversary like my time hop yesterday it's like the crate getting set up and like i'm just i remember those days i think it's like six days till the bra anniversary and I'm literally just gonna like cry all day like I'm so it's just so crazy this journey that I've been on in the last year

and what this man Brew has brought to my life and what his role in the journey was and I don't know if anyone out there is thinking about getting a puppy right now and I know it's a lot of responsibility and a lot of work.

Yes.

But I just need to let you know I don't remember any of that.

I only remember the love.

It has been worth it on every single level.

And Brew actually actually took kind of a long time to get trained.

And, you know, sometimes he still has his moments.

And I wouldn't trade it for the world.

So if you're looking for a sign to get a puppy or even, you know, a cat or...

No, this is not a sign to get a cat.

A hamster.

Sure.

A pet of any sort.

A pet rock.

Do it because

it will change your life.

Couldn't echo that sentiment any harder if I tried.

I mean, I mean, I've been like trying to tell everyone this, like, forever.

Like, that first year, it is hard, you know, not to minimize minimize it's hard but my god is it worth it it's and you know what now looking back at the year like that portion where brew literally needed to go out every 30 minutes feels like it was you know a dream no but it feels like it was such a short period of time they just need to grow a little bit to get the bladder bigger and then they can hold it for longer but at that time it was just still so exciting and i just

I'm feeling, you know, very grateful for the brew in my life.

I absolutely love to hear that.

Happy anniversary to Bruno, to you, Zach, the whole family.

We've been celebrating the whole week, so I think we're going to do seven days of brew.

Love you.

Unfortunately, I am gone for the next seven days.

So I will be there.

Ben said he was going to be happy to celebrate for the first three days because he loves being an uncle to brew, even though I think he's met him like three times.

No, Ben loves brew.

He does.

Yeah, he talks about Bruno all the time.

He said that?

Yeah.

No, he literally doesn't even know brew.

No, not at all.

But speaking of Ben, today is my last show of the week because I'm headed to Rome to eat some spaghetti.

You know, I was actually thinking this morning, I do not know like one thing.

I don't know how to say anything in Italian.

Yeah, you do.

Ciao.

Ciao.

Um,

bella.

I should have done babble.

It's not too late.

Do it on the plane.

Because, like, because classes are snackable.

Traveling to a country where you don't know, like, and even like, you know, where's the bathroom, like, it's kind of dangerous.

Mangiorno.

I think I'm fluent.

Mutto bene.

Mutzarella.

Mutzarella.

You should do Babble on the Plane.

Smackable classes.

Today's not sponsored by Babble.

I was just thinking last night how I legit don't know like one lick of Italian, but Ben is filling in for me tomorrow, Friday, and Monday.

So if you have something you've been wanting to ask Ben or just something you've been thinking about getting Ben's take on, let us know.

Yeah.

Ben is full of takes.

He is full of takes.

They're usually...

terrible.

I look forward to hearing what he brings to the table.

You know, I do love an out-of-the-box take.

I do.

O-O-T-B-T.

Yeah.

So I am here for whatever he wants to bring to the show.

No, YouTube will get along swimmingly.

Like, Ben, like, when it comes to, when I ask him to, like, form an opinion on, like, toe stuff or just in general, when he's having an opinion on something, he'll come up with like the worst take ever just because like he wants to be like contrarian and different.

And, you know, that element I do respect, but the take is so bad.

No, you can't just do it for the sake of doing it, you know?

Can I be honest with you?

Sometimes it feels like you have your like controversial takes like just for the sake of being a contrarian.

and that's your feeling and that's not fact i don't do it for the sake of it i do it because i think most of the time if everybody's saying the exact same thing and it seems too simple and too good to be true you know there's multiple sides to every story and you've got to look at it from a layered perspective

sure and i think you should apply that to all areas of your life some things aren't so simple and sometimes the majority

They don't know what they got it wrong.

No, I mean that's definitely true, but it's not like all the time.

No, I mean, sometimes I'm just like, yeah, happy for them, period.

You're full of hot takes.

So it should be a very interesting week with you and Ben.

I mean, it makes for an interesting show.

100%.

So that's Thursday, Friday, and Monday with Ben.

I'll be back on Tuesday.

Try not to miss me so much.

I am really, I'm actually going to watch, I can't do Babel on the Plane.

I'm going to watch the Lizzie McGuire movie before I fall asleep.

I kind of just need some inspiration from Miss Ungermeyer.

That's what I'm going to do.

Okay, have fun.

And I'm going to listen to the soundtrack.

And I actually, if you have any good captions, like Lizzie McGuire, I like forgot all like the, I don't even remember what happened in the movie.

I just watch a movie.

Sneaky Brown knows her with a hidden agenda.

But if you went to Rome and you have like

some good captions that you use that are like Lizzie McGuire, Miss Ungermeyer like references, do send them my way because I'm curious.

You're about to watch a movie.

You're going to need a chocolate.

No, no, no.

Just because I watch a movie, I need like creative, like maybe ideas for TikToks, like something.

If you have any ideas, just send them my way.

Okay.

Do you plan on doing a lot of content on this trip?

100%.

Cool.

And it's going to be all Liz McGuire.

Like, what else is there to do in Rome except talk about the Liz Maguire movie?

That's true.

What other movies take place in Rome?

Like, none.

Um.

What's that Anna Farris movie?

What happened?

No, not

something about Rome.

Do you know what I'm talking about?

It's like one of her million, like, rom-coms.

I think, like, Josh Dumel was in it.

I don't.

It's like they built.

What is that movie?

Hold on.

Romantic Comedy.

But do you know what I'm talking about?

Romantic comedy Rome

is um

meh.

Am I making this movie up in my head?

Yeah, because it doesn't ring a bell and I'm quite familiar with her catalog.

No, but maybe not Anna Farris, but like one of those girls.

Like, what's it about?

Like, Rome.

I don't know.

There's like a wedding in Rome.

And like, he's going to be her date.

Honestly, it didn't come up.

I haven't seen it.

But I'm sure it's.

It's not to Rome with love.

I don't even know what that is.

There's a Sarah Jessica Parker movie, All Roads Lead to Rome.

That's not it.

Maybe I am just like making up this movie.

I'm gonna do one with Brittany Murphy and Ashton Kutcher, where they're like Jilly Wedge.

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh.

Honeymoon, they're on their honeymoon.

What's that movie called?

Google it.

That is the best movie.

And is it in Rome?

It's Rome Vibes.

Okay, but it could be, you know, like Milan.

You know, that movie is like always playing on E, movies we love.

What is this called?

I think it's Just Married.

Just married.

Okay, where does it take place?

Everywhere.

Just married.

Okay.

So it was nominated for a Golden Globe.

What?

Okay, it doesn't have like their itinerary on here, but I don't think that they went to...

Why the movie made $100 million?

It was that good.

It was

no quality.

Oh, Venice.

Oh.

Not Rome.

Same but different.

Same but different.

But yeah, so like if you have any good, I don't know.

So the only cultural reference I know is the Lizzie McGuire movie.

Got it.

If you have any good captions that you use and like got like so many likes on, like, let me know because I want to steal it.

Okay, cool.

Simple enough.

Because obviously, the first one is like me at the Trevi Fountain feeling like a sneaky brown noser with a hidden agenda.

Why does it have to be Trevi Fountain?

Because that's like so Rome.

Okay.

I mean, I guess I could just like geotag, but like, I want it to be like this really Roman picture.

And, like, for me, when I think Rome, I think Sneaky Brown Noser with a Hidden Agenda.

Okay, okay.

What do you think of?

Um,

Paolo.

Oh, also, Euro Trip.

But, like, I don't really, like, know that movie.

Yeah.

Or the references.

Except, they've elected a new pup when like the white smoke comes out.

Yeah.

That'll be one of my captions, too.

Okay, perfect.

I'm starting to google that.

No, like, there's.

You're going to have to take a lot of pictures.

Do you think your friends are up to the task?

Like, your husband's not going.

Okay, so Ben's not going to be going.

He's not going.

Okay, but I have Abe.

Oh, okay.

Abe is like one of my best friends from high school, and he's very, like, actually very artsy, and he can take a pic.

Okay.

And he knows he's been tasked.

like because i got so many dresses like i'm gonna look so cute except like i did get this gown that i fully intend to re-wear like

maybe to three more weddings and i'm thinking i actually won't take any pictures at the actual wedding in the dress like for my instagram yeah i think that's a good idea because i don't know how everyone's keeping up with all these weddings like dresses everything like everything on revolve is on back order like you can't get a gown on revolve until literally december that's true i actually just had to order some dresses and of course the ones that i liked were on pre-order of course didn't help anything but i do feel like i was actually just thinking about this.

I do feel like it's easier than ever to get dresses.

Like, I remember when I was in college, like, you would have formal, and, like, you would have to borrow a dress from a friend.

Right, right, right.

Now, these girls just have a revolving door of revolve packages with, like, formal dresses.

I never went to a formal.

Like, you haven't lived.

Really?

What was it?

What did they do?

It was just like, it was like a college party, but it was formal.

So, like, everyone dressed up.

Everyone dressed up.

What did you guys wear?

Like, suit, very nice.

And you had a date, so there was like a romantic element.

And so some people just like invited a friend for formal.

But like sometimes it was like if you had a crush on someone and like they have a formal, are they going to invite you?

Oh, yeah.

And how many times, how frequent were the formals?

So like each fraternity, each group would have like one a season.

So like two a year per house.

So there's a lot of formals going around.

And how many houses are there?

And sometimes they would have, it depends on the school.

Right.

And also I'm sure that depends on the school too.

But also sometimes they would have like a formal and a semi-formal.

Like they had the big one and a smaller one.

So it's just like was really cute.

So how many formals did you go to?

And when you ask someone to a formal, is it like a big deal or do you just like send a via text?

You send a via text.

But like it's a big deal.

No, but they don't make like a big deal.

It's not prom.

Okay.

It's not like a proposal.

It's not prom.

It's not rock cella.

No, it's not rock cella.

How many formals did I?

I went to a fair share of formals.

And were you like a gal who got asked?

Because honestly, I think as much as this sounds really fun, I'm so grateful.

I think I'm so grateful I went to NYU.

Cause like, okay, let's say all of your, it's okay, there's so many.

You don't have to be invited to everyone, but like all your friends are going to one and then you're like scrambling to find a date like some pathetic loser but like it never really happened in such a sad way like that for example if all of your but it would happen for me no but like if all of your friends were going then they were all going with like a group of guys who were friends say and then there was more than like like someone in their group of friends who didn't have a date and would invite you like it usually worked out like that um but sometimes you like went to a formal where you didn't know anyone you know because you have

taking a leap on an unknown man that's painful no but like it's just that's the closest you'll get to romance and then if

but if I'm a guy

and like I want to invite a girl who like knows everyone because like I don't want to be babysitting my dad, there's that too.

So like you could get just a friend, like a social invite.

So you could get like, actually, I feel like I might be invited a lot because I'm just like playing this out.

I went to NYU.

Like, I just actually feel like I might have been invited to a lot of foremost.

Because, like, you don't have to worry about me.

Like, you can go.

I don't even need to talk to you.

Like, drop me off.

I'll meet a new guy, hang out with my friends.

But, like, you'll have a date, but you won't have to babysit me.

And like, we can have the best time.

But like, if you need to go do your thing, like, I'm good on my own.

Yes.

Only thing is like he might want to have sex

with someone.

No,

it's not going to be you.

No, definitely not.

So like,

oh, so interesting.

There's like this whole part of your life.

And also sometimes there would be like, depend on, not on a, for a formal formal, but for some of the like more casual formals, there would sometimes just be like a social list of people, girl, like people

at the party.

Yeah, guys are girls who were invited who weren't anyone's date.

We just like them.

So got it, got it.

That could be your.

Yeah, oh, by the way, I'm like the head of of the social committee for sure yeah and like I keep the list

love that oh you know I was watching a tick tock that was like you know top 10 schools that consume the most beer number one was like University of Wisconsin Colgate was like number four that's crazy because the population is so small

it's like 3,000 max that's crazy yo that's a lot of beer

I didn't contribute to any of it yeah never

actually we did keg stands that one time we did

pictures you did you did one too I don't know if I did you definitely did one.

Maybe for the picture, but still, I was definitely not drinking.

Some of my fondest memories are those weekends that we used to visit you at college.

Ooh, what a time.

What a place.

And just to clarify, I just don't drink beer.

I drank like a few things.

I just am not a beer girly.

In my old age, I actually have started to enjoy it quite a bit.

You have.

You know, it's just like

something that

I don't that I'm just trying to reconcile.

It's like my college years were just a few years off from like canned cocktails like white claws white claws great society great society like that would have changed my college experience if like i didn't always have to like

pre-game before because there wasn't gonna be vibe at the party like because some schools like ban hard alcohol at part like oh my god there was so much

chaos surrounding like trying to get a drink if you weren't a beer drinker and that like white claw just solved that 100% and like now if you go I mean I haven't been to a college party but I imagine there's just cases of like truly white clothes on my society.

I can't even imagine.

I agree.

Like that is a game changer.

And honestly,

that's such a good call.

Yeah, I think about it often.

I'm happy for the kids now, but you know, I really would have been just like.

My whole life would have been different.

Totally.

But we have an amazing show for you guys.

It is my last show of the week, so I'm just going to try and make it my best one yet.

We do have a juicy TV recap.

We've got Vanderprump Rules, which I did catch up on, and last night's episode was fine.

Last night was also the season finale of Only Murders in the Building, the most perfect show on television.

television.

Most perfect.

We watched it.

And I also, I did watch the new episode of Impeachment.

Me and Ben, Ben literally stumbled in and he's like, is impeachment on?

He doesn't even remember my birthday, but he knows that, you know, Tuesday at nine o'clock is impeachment.

And I was like, I don't know.

And we recorded it and it was on and it was so good.

So now you're watching week to week, you think?

I mean, I didn't plan on it, but Ben all of a sudden is like this timely person.

And we watch it.

And it did it.

I mean, I would love to just binge it.

It's so good.

And when the episode ends, I'm like depressed.

So we'll see moving forward how I handle it.

But I would love for it to just be dropped.

Like leave it, like it's enough.

And when you watch on FX, there's commercials.

Like it's not a premium experience.

But then it goes to Hulu the next day.

Yeah, but I use Actuiro's Hulu and he don't have that like extra subscription.

I'm about to like just click it for him.

But I bought the whole season on iTunes.

So like I just they download them automatically.

Got it.

I have them all recorded on my TV.

So I'll watch that way.

Can I tell you like how unenjoyable it is to skip through the commercials?

Like when I watch on iTunes, it was literally like a film.

It's like an hour long.

There's like, it goes black and then it comes.

Then you have to do anything.

And last night I was like every five minutes like with the clicker.

Like it's so annoying.

So annoying.

These are some tough times we're living in.

So that will be the TV recap segment.

We've got the fast five and I don't have anything else to say unless you do.

No, I had a lovely evening of nesting last night.

I cooked, like, so I started because I just wanted to make a salad to go with my dressing.

I was still in the fridge.

And then I was like, I have some chicken, let's cook that up.

And then I was like, we need a starch, made some pasta.

So I really created a whole culinary experience.

It looked really good.

It was really good.

And when I'm so funny, like, I just decided at like four o'clock, I'm like, time to cook dinner.

And then I go to get Zach and he's like still on calls.

And I'm just like, he just had lunch.

I'm like, it's like 5.30.

He's like still working.

And I'm like, why don't you want to eat my meal?

And it's like, because you started cooking at 4 o'clock.

Like, I just don't plan at all.

So I got to get better about that.

But it's like, I don't do the cooking for like mealtimes.

I do it because it's an activity.

Obviously.

So, that's just that was fun.

And then I read a lot last night.

I'm reading Apples Never Fall by Leanne Moriarty.

You know her.

She's Big Little Eyes, Nine Perfect Strangers.

Husband's Secret.

Husband's Secret, What Alice Forgot, which is still my favorite Leanne Moriarty book, but maybe it's just because it was the first one that I read.

And I'm really enjoying Apples Never Fall.

For some reason, the description like made me think it was spooky about like a murder.

It's not spooky at all.

And I just like love her voice, Leanne Moriarty.

Like I was cracking up this character that's like the mom of the family.

It's just so funny.

And she's like, the house is so quiet now that all her kids are grown.

So she listens to podcasts like on her like beats heavy

toes all throughout the day so that she can be like and her daughter has like migraines.

So she listens to like living with migraines.

And it's like, she's such, she's hysterical.

So I'm really enjoying the book.

Hopefully I finish it like today.

I've been on a reading, like bit plowing through reading.

Well, I haven't, but I am charging my Kindle for my trip.

And I was thinking that I wanted to read, excuse me, excuse me.

Bless you.

That I wanted to read that new housewives book by Dave.

We're going to talk about it in the stories.

Okay.

Because I want to talk about to read or not to read.

Okay, same.

So then I'll save what I was going to say.

Okay.

And I also have Beach Read on deck.

That's all I was going to say.

I haven't read it yet.

I liked it when I read it.

I don't know if that's your next book.

We'll talk about it.

Okay, then give me some like just generic, you know, murder, thrill, romance, something like silly, you know?

Like, what was that book about the girl who got married in nantucket but then there was a murder at the wedding um that was was it ellen hildebrand yeah 27

the perfect couple the perfect couple yeah like some shit like that you know okay okay i'm going through something nonsensical nonsensical

i'm looking i've i've had such a weird year of reading jackie my flight is at 5 30 and i get in at 7 a.m

That roam time.

Like, do you sleep the whole time?

Well, you'll sleep as much as you can.

Yeah, but like, should I take, like, a sleeping pill and just, like, try and sleep the eight hours so I wake up, like, refreshed, 7 a.m.

in Rome.

Yikes.

I know.

I don't know.

Or do you sleep a little bit more when you get to the hotel till like 11?

Yeah, but like, once I'm in Rome, I just want to, you know, be a sneaky brown noser with my hidden agenda.

That is true.

Do you read The Good Sister by Sally Hepworth yet?

No, I didn't.

It's really good.

Okay, done.

I think that's the one.

We stand Sally Hepworth in this house.

We really do.

I need to, like, go read some of her other books.

But before I can do that, without further ado, it is time for the past five stories that you need to know before you wake up and take a bite out of your morning toast.

I just remembered I didn't put on deodorant today.

That does not have anything to do with today's sponsor.

I just, you know, when like you lift your armpits and there's like a little

moisture.

No, not moisture.

I wouldn't say moisture, actually.

I would say more of like a textured stickiness.

You know, like when you like lift and like the flaps of your armpits like are sticking together.

Yep, yep, yep.

And then I'm like, oh yeah, I didn't put on deodorant.

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Okay, our first story, just this has been a roller coaster, you guys.

And right now we're on another,

I would say we're going up.

We're climbing.

Lala Ken is home with Randall, according to TMZ, and not calling off the engagement yet.

Lala and Randall are trying to save their engagement.

TMZ has learned they're at home together working on their relationship, even as rumors fly that they've split.

Sources familiar with the situation tell TMZ that Lala and Randall have not broken off their engagement despite reports to the contrary.

They're told Lala went to the Beverly Hills Hotel on Sunday night and stayed there as part of a planned night out with her girlfriends, and she's now back home in the couple's Bel-Air estate.

And according to like the Instagram photos that they've been posting, it does look like referencing the pictures she's posted, it actually looks like that's in their house.

They also have a podcast, and they released a podcast episode yesterday and mentioned nothing of this.

Well, it probably was pre-recorded.

I read somewhere that it was like just recorded, but I don't, there's no proof of that.

Yeah, I feel like they probably recorded it even a few days ago.

But then, also, so I saw this article from TMZ and I was feeling so hopeful because I, you know, TMZ is usually

pretty truthful.

So, I was like, okay, this is really good news.

And then, also, did you see that Randall posted a video of two girls like working in his office?

So he goes to the two girls from Nashville.

So he was trying to make a lot of money.

Were they truly just working on business?

So he was in the Nashville lobby with a blonde and a brunette, and in his office are a blonde and a brunette.

And he posted them, not saying anything, but I think wanting us to like infer that.

But there is other damning evidence from this situation.

It's not just those photos.

I believe there are text messages floating around.

So he's not completely out of the woods yet, but I don't know.

Like,

you know, Sheena said something really fucking mean on

Vanner Pump Rules last night when he, when, or maybe it was two episodes ago because I just caught up, when Randall was like, no, I don't change diapers.

And she was like,

Sheena and her confessionals was like, I could never be with someone who like refuses to change a diaper no matter how much money he has.

I guess Lala can be bought.

Yeah, no, she keeps saying mean stuff about Lala and her confessionals.

They must not be friends right now.

That's like a really mean thing to say.

Yeah, and weirdly enough, last night on Vanner Pump Rules, this sort sort of conversation came up between Lala and Sheena where

Lala was pretty much telling Sheena, like, how you get them is how you lose them.

And also, Lala, to herself, is like, and I understand that about my situation.

And it's like a concern of mine.

Right.

Like, it's something that lives in the back of my head.

And, like, I actually, I think a lot of people saw that scene and were like, oh, how ironic.

But I'm like, what moral high ground do you have, Lala?

But I thought, I had a lot of respect for her, like, owning it completely.

Yeah, they are like, how can you talk about bra considering what's going on in your relationship now?

But it's like, watching that scene, Lala has such a good head on her shoulders and the fact and it's true so many times people get into a relationship you know they were married or separated and then and the saying goes how you get them is how you lose them and and Lala is aware of that doesn't mean she's not going to be with Randall or give him a chance but like it's not something that she's going to like blissfully be delusional about yeah so I actually thought that it was the perfect scene to watch while we're all like dealing with this news because it's like, oh, whatever, regardless of what happens, like she's going to be fine.

Nothing is going to surprise her.

No, and Lala didn't think that like this was out of the realm of possibility.

And Lala's not living her life like Randall is like will be there forever, and I don't need to do anything ever.

Like, she's and that's really what like Sheena does, like, with everyone.

Yeah, she has multiple businesses.

Like, I think she's always, you know, planning on taking care of herself if it ever comes to that.

So, I don't know what's going on between Lala and Rand.

I'm feeling extremely hopeful.

This is some good news for the Landle stands.

Our ship, you guys, it's not sinking like I think it's more Rala.

It's whatever you want it to be.

And I'm feeling like for once, you know, my optimism has paid off.

Yeah, no, you're always like delusionally optimistic.

And like, more often than not, like Kim and Kanye, like, the world lets you down.

So, like, you needed this.

With Kim and Kanye, I actually think my optimism protected me because I never really had to deal.

Like, so when everyone was reporting that they were separating, divorcing, and they never confirmed it.

I was like, okay, well, they haven't confirmed it.

So it's like, I don't have to grieve yet because it might not be.

And then by the time she did share it on Keeping Up, I was way more prepared to hear it.

Yes, of course, it softened the blow.

And then I was like, Okay, so that's true, like, they're not together, but this isn't now new news to me.

Like, I'm okay with it.

And now, they're in a place where they're so simpatico that it's like, I never had to grieve, I skipped the grieving process altogether.

That's true, and now I'm so familiar with the idea of them not being together, like separate, but like sympatica, yeah.

And so, it's the best case scenario.

Sometimes your optimism can protect you.

I do think Lala Randall will probably be fine.

Yeah.

That's just like a gut feeling of mine.

I have no proof of that.

But I would love for some clarification on what the fuck's going on for sure.

She was also spotted walking without her engagement ring on, but she was also like not dressed up.

So maybe she just like didn't put her jewelry on.

I just want to say I can't abide by that.

Like, okay, I literally hate when people are like, she wasn't wearing her ring.

Like, it's

maybe for a guy, it means something because like Ben never takes his ring off.

He like sleeps in in it, showers in it.

If I'm home, my ring is off.

If I'm running to the grocery store, my ring is off.

Like, so all these paparazzi pictures, like spotted without her ring, means literally nothing.

Absolutely zilch.

Zilch.

I mean, I think sometimes celebrities like use it as like a

tool to let us know what's going on.

So if they're at the grocery store with like a sponsored beverage in hand and no ring, like, okay, they're trying to tell us something.

No, but if it's truly a paparazzi, like catching you in your natural state at the grocery store getting a coffee and you're not wearing your ring to me that means absolutely nothing means nothing I completely agree so there's still hope between the two of them and maybe they are going through a rough patch like maybe those pictures text messages were just like you know

uh a warning sign and maybe they're gonna work it out I'm gonna I'm gonna go with TMZ because it's TMZ saying they're together and page six is saying that they split so those are two

kind of as far as you know tabloids go they're kind of reputable sources yeah I mean honestly but considering this is an LA landing I'm gonna go with TMZ.

I agree.

HX has a New York tea, but I do believe TMZ's got it covered in California.

Why would Randall cheat on Lala?

Like, honestly, I was watching her and I'm like, she is so gorgeous.

Like, I forget what I was watching.

I think when they were

sitting out playing Jenga in Palm Springs and she was wearing like this gorgeous hat and sunglasses and like a little black bathing suit I'm like there's literally nobody in the world who's more gorgeous and she just had a baby like what else is out there and she's got the personality too like she's really in the full package will keep it interesting you'll always be laughing.

Like, she is everything of the sort.

I agree, but you know what?

Like, when a man is a serial cheater, like that, like, it doesn't make sense.

Right.

They don't do it based on logic.

Right.

They just, they've got problems.

Yeah.

So.

That is so lame.

Like, honestly.

Serial cheater.

Like, that's not a thing.

Yeah.

It's just don't cheat on your wife or don't be married.

That's what, like, the page six is saying that he has this, like, two sides to him.

I don't know if he's a serial cheater.

No, but like, okay, that's a thing, like, serial cheater.

And it's just like, don't cheat on your wife.

Like, it's really not that hard, especially when she just had a baby.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Ocean is mad cute.

Beyond.

So we'll see.

We shall see.

But you guys.

Time will tell.

I'm feeling better than I did at the outset of the book.

I'm glad.

Our next story.

The executive producer for Bravo's Real Housewives of Beverly Hills claims Lisa Vanderpump leaked the puppygate story.

Obviously.

Okay, so a new Real Housewives tell-all book called Not All Diamonds and Rose has just dropped by David Quinn.

Dave Quinn, sorry, I don't know him like that.

And there are just, you know, bombs aplenty.

It's like an oral history of the beginning of Real Housewives, of a lot of the things that we've seen.

So one is that the

Beverly Hills producer is saying that when Lisa lost the narrative in the show and she realized that it wasn't going the way she wanted, that's when she leaked the story to the press about Lucy Lucy Apple Juicy.

Okay, so let's talk about Lucy Lucy Apple Juicy and then let's talk about the other bombs.

Just the book in general.

So obviously Lisa Vanderpump leaked that whole Dorit dog rescue thing.

That's the least surprising thing of all time.

But, you know, when I was watching Vanderprump Rules last night, I was thinking a lot about Lisa Vanderpump.

Like, my God, what a irrelevant person.

Like, talk about a fall from Grace.

You know, she thought she was too good for the housewise.

She, like, didn't even show up at the end, but she had this like sickening franchise.

She didn't need it.

Vanderpump Rules like imploded on its own.

She got her own show that was like actually, I think, detrimental to her reputation.

That's how like

embarrassing the ratings were.

And she's just like kind of like flop central now.

Like, what in, where in the world is Lisa Vanderpump?

Yeah, it's true.

I mean, I'm still seeing her like hanging out with these children on Vanderpump rules.

And she's like making fun of James's ring because he said he got it from Tiffany's and he didn't.

Like, what are you doing?

Like, you're a grown fucking woman.

I don't know.

It's, it, it's pretty sad.

And

I guess I, the thing is, when someone like is lying so blatantly, like, you know, Kyle came to her house to ask her as a friend, did you leak it?

And she's like, no.

Like, you, at a certain point, it's like, okay, maybe she didn't.

Yeah, that's always an element in your mind.

So reading this, it is a little bit surprising that like after all like she died on that hill for that lie she really did even though like in hindsight she's the only one who talks to radar online like they used words that like she uses that were like weirdly specific words like it was written in her voice duh but still at the time i was like well did she or was it someone in her camp you know but like nope it was her and wasn't john from venterpump dogs right exactly or someone who like overheard her speaking and then ran and told radar online in the same words that she used you know?

But no, it's not.

Sometimes the answer is the simplest one.

I just feel like she went out in such a coward-like way, and she's really just gone downhill from there.

Yeah.

For like in so many ways.

Like every time there's something about her in the press, it's never flattering.

When the women do refer to her, it's like in the most negative way.

Vanderpump Rules is a fraction of what it used to be, a shell of the show it used to be.

And it's just like, honestly, Lisa Vanderpump is kind of irrelevant.

Like she is.

You just love to see it.

Yeah.

I mean, Vanderpump Rules is not like our favorite show anymore, but still, I guess she does have like her own show on Bravo.

Okay, but when she left Beverly Hills, I think that she had the energy to do it because she was literally an executive producer of the biggest show on television.

Like Vanderprump Rules for so long was this like rocket ship.

Like everyone was obsessed.

Like everyone on the show was having all the success.

Lisa was like the girl.

And now it's just like a regular show like everyone else, like a losery reality show that doesn't have the longevity that it used to.

Yeah.

So, some of the other stuff that's come out from the book that I've seen so far, Carol.

Okay, Carol versus Andy,

some spat there.

I'm sorry, I just like can't be bothered to care, but did you see that a lot of the women from New York said that Bethany was the one who set up the picture of Tom kissing another woman at the Regency?

What?

So, apparently, this is what they're saying, allegedly.

I'm just swearing, I don't want to hear this stuff.

Like, I want to read it in the book.

Oh, you so you do want to read it.

Okay, we'll talk about the book.

But then I also want to ask, like, if I should read the book, and I'll give you my

reasoning on why.

Same for me.

This is what I read: that

I guess Bethany's friend, like, Bethany had a friend who Bethany knew was like in communication with Tom, and so she kind of orchestrated them getting together at the Regency and kissing, and that's how she got the photo because she kind of set it up as opposed to like randomly her friend was at the Regency and got a picture of it.

I don't know if I believe it.

At the time, people thought it might have been production that told Bethany about it, but more sinisterly, some of the women are saying that Bethany actually like knew about the whole setup.

If it's coming from the real housewives of New York, they're such jealous women and they're they like hate Bethany.

I don't really believe that.

Bethany has like a lot going on.

Like she was dealing with her custody battle and her million-dollar business and her child.

Like, I don't know if she has time to set up Tom in the regency.

Yeah, I don't know either.

I don't totally believe it, but I could see a situation where it's like Bethany knew they all had their concerns about Tom.

And Bethany knew that she had a friend who was like, Tom was talking to her.

And she she was like, wait, would Tom really do this?

And so she was like, go meet up with him, like, do whatever you want to do.

And

was maybe trying to give him the benefit of the doubt that he wouldn't like make out with her in public.

But then when he did, like, and she got the picture, because her reaction, I'm sorry, that's not acting.

Like, she was literally like a

panic attack.

Like, I think maybe, even if she did set it up, which I don't think it's possible she didn't, but even if she did, I think maybe he thought she thought that like that wouldn't be the outcome.

I do not think it was like a test that he failed.

I don't think that she had anything to do with it because if the only proof is coming from like Ramona Singer and Dorinda, Luann, they hate Bethany.

They hate her.

I don't believe that at all.

But part of the reason why I'm struggling with this book, because there is a bunch of good tea coming out, but I feel like I've heard it all already.

Like the big things are this that you just told me, Lucy Vanderpump selling Lucy, Lucy, Apple Juicy, and then like Carol and Andy Do Not Talk Anymore.

She went absolutely ballistic on Andy.

So I feel like I've heard like the juiciest pieces.

And my concern is that this book is published by Andy Cohen Books.

It's like their first book ever.

It's like his imprint.

And I can't imagine that it would be that juicy because, first of all,

there's probably a lot of juice around Andy, and like Andy had to approve all this book.

Like, it's going to be a very flattering book for Andy.

And I don't know.

I feel like it's just, it's not going to go there like 100% because it's like an Andy book, if that makes sense.

I think it'll go there on stuff that happened so long ago that's irrelevant.

Like, sure, we'll get the tea on what happened between Gina Keogh and Mickey, but like, I don't who cares?

I know.

And the book I saw Andy hold it up on Watch What Happens Live is massive.

So maybe, like, so I don't want, I'm not downloading that on my Kindle.

No, I was actually thinking it's much more of a physical read and it's like maybe a cute like thing to put on your coffee table.

And like maybe you just, I agree, it's too big to put on a Kindle.

Like it's overwhelming.

It's like a textbook.

It's a textbook.

So my conclusion was that I wasn't going to read it because

I

like I don't think I'm that level of housewife fan anymore that I've got to read the books too.

I mean, so sometimes like when a book comes out that's like has bombshells and you see in like every news article another day, another bombshell like Jessica Simpson.

It's like, oh my God, I have to read this.

I'm not even going to look at the spoilers.

This doesn't feel that way to me.

I'm like, I'm happy to just get the nuggets from the news.

Well, to be honest, it's such a thick book.

And I feel like so much of it is about Orange County because it really was the first franchise.

I know that Vicki's like very involved in the book, as is Scott Dunlop, who

produced and produces

Orange County.

And like, to be honest, like, I really don't care about Orange County, like, not in the slightest.

To me, the first franchise is New York.

And, like, you want to fight me on that?

That's fine.

Like, I know that Orange County was like a year or two before, but

the New York women put the show on the map.

Yeah.

If this book had come out a few years ago, I probably would have read it.

But I just don't feel like I don't have the reverence for the show that I once did.

I agree.

So I don't really care about the tea.

And if it was like shorter, I might have read it, but it does feel weird because didn't Brian Moylan just write a book like this?

Yeah.

The real story of the real housewives.

Yeah, but is that part of it?

Andy's image?

No.

So it feels like this is like the more in-depth version.

Yeah.

But Andy was so involved with this book, it gives it like the stamp of approval.

Yes.

But then also it makes you wonder like, you know, it's definitely been ventured.

Yes, right.

Okay, I'm looking at

Brian and Moyla.

And like, are they putting stuff in there about how much everyone's getting paid?

Like, that's the shit I want to know.

Yeah, I don't know.

I wonder if the book's going to do well.

I feel like it will.

And they're like bravo, and everyone, every housewife was at the party last night.

Like, everyone is giving it 100%.

I'm sure it will do well.

Yeah.

There's tons of fans.

We're going to continue on with our stories, but not before I let you know that today's episode is brought to you by Ship Station.

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Our next story.

Celine Dionne has been forced to delay her Las Vegas residency over severe muscle spasms.

Celine Dion is delaying the opening of her new residency because of severe and persistent muscle spasms she announced on Tuesday morning.

The unforeseen medical symptoms have been preventing her from performing, so the songstress is canceling her dates that were originally scheduled from November 5th to November 21st and January 19th to February 5th.

If you guys had tickets, I'm really sorry.

Well, I really hope she's okay, but selfishly, I'm like so

relieved because November 5th, like Brian had tickets in Vegas, but it is your birthday and I would never miss your birthday.

So I said, no, Brian, I can't go to this amazing once-in-a-lifetime chance because I love my sister more than life itself.

And now it got canceled.

So I didn't even have to go.

Didn't have to make the choice.

This is really like concerning.

I hope everything is truly okay.

You have to cancel so many shows.

I know.

And like,

I'm not saying that what she, that she's lying, but like, you know, when celebrities release things like this, they always have a reason.

And it's always something else.

And it's none of our business.

So I really hope that whatever is actually going on, because I don't think it's muscle spasms, these, I don't know if that would take a month, you know?

I really, really hope she's okay.

Like, she's a queen.

She gives us so much.

Yeah.

She is the soundtrack of our lives.

And, like, whatever time she needs, like, we will give her the time and the grace.

I just really, I hope she's okay.

Yeah.

Take the time, all the time that she needs.

Plus, like, her performances are so, like, obviously, vocally, she gives us everything and more.

And just

physically, emotionally.

And so, she needs to always be operating at like 100.

You know, she can't really, there's no phoning it in when you're sling.

So, I understand, like, you know, if not everything is is, is working properly, then we need to postpone.

And let's like remind, remember, she's been doing this for so long.

She's been through so much.

If she needs time off, she needs time off, and she does not need to give me an explanation.

I really

feel like in this day and age, like people postponing tours, residencies, concerts, dates, like so common.

It's so common.

And it's like, okay, what's another six-month waiting?

Right.

No, because of COVID, like we all got our money back and we saw like the world didn't end.

So now like people are just like shifting, canceling, adding shows.

It's like, it's actually lovely.

Like it's much more flexible now.

Yeah, it is.

And it seems like less of a big deal.

Like when someone used to like cancel a tour, it would be like worldwide news.

And now it's just maybe like, you know, COVID stuff, they just like use it as an excuse now probably as well.

But it must be a relief for them that it's like they don't have to upend their whole business.

Oh, yeah.

Like if I'm canceling a show due to poor ticket sales, I'm 100% saying it's because of COVID.

100%.

Someone in the venue has COVID.

Like 100%.

Just know, like, if I ever cancel a show, I'm going to regret saying this, it's because nobody bought tickets.

Like, that's the only reason to cancel a show, unless, like, I break my leg.

No, or like, maybe something came up in your, say, the ticket sales were like meh, something came up that you'd rather be doing.

And you, like, there's other reasons because Las Vegas, Nevada, dirty jeans tour.

Canceling because of ticket sales.

No.

Okay, so, like, literally, I was supposed to go.

No, definitely not.

I was supposed to do a show in Vegas, and it was, like, such a big push.

Like, I was on a billboard in Vegas, and when we launched,

it's like a thousand-person theater.

I sold 100 tickets.

And they were very like, to Vegas is a weird market.

You sell the tickets two weeks before.

Like, that's just how it goes.

Because people don't know they're going to Vegas until they're in Vegas.

And I'm like, and I understand that, but like, you have to understand how my business works.

Like, the toasters, the Patreon, like, we are prepared.

Like, we get our tickets months in advance.

I don't have a good feeling about this.

And I'm not traveling six hours, but I was going to Vegas for my birthday.

Remember my 25th, oh my God, I'm so old.

25th birthday, Ocean's 25.

And then I was going to have to go back to Vegas like two weeks later.

I'm like, I'm not like killing myself just to get no offense to see 100 people.

How pathetic is that?

So I'm like, cancel, and the 100 people were upset, and I'm sorry, but like.

But it was COVID.

Thank you.

It was, there was a deadly illness penetrating through the mirage.

Yeah.

So what can you do?

And I had like this gorgeous wall.

I was like, out of her hands.

I had this like gorgeous wall that was like Bob Sagett, Amy Schumer, like Claudia Asher.

And I took it down.

You should have just done the show just to

that.

I just didn't want to wait it out.

Like I'm sure more tickets.

I'm sure I could have gotten to like 500 by

the time of the show, but like, I hate performing in front of half-filled rooms.

It's depressing.

Trust me, I've done it a lot.

Casino Rama.

Ooh, that was dark.

Where is that?

Outside of Toronto.

It's in Rama, Ontario.

Honestly, I don't even know where it is, but.

That sounds right.

Yeah.

And it was like a half-filled room, and there was like a bunch of toasters there.

But there was also...

See, when you play casinos, you get such great deals.

Like, why wouldn't you play a casino game?

It's like big rooms.

And casinos are just filled with money.

So they're paying you more than

Madison Square Garden.

So casinos are the best, but you, especially in like this remote part of town, like I'm doing Parks Casino this time around and it's sold out already because like that's by Philly.

So I know everyone who's coming is a toaster.

But when you perform at a casino, you get out on the casino email list to like the VIPs,

the locals.

And so when I was in Casino Rama, I would say there was...

Probably like 800 people there in a place that filled 3,000.

So it felt very small.

And I would say about 200 of them were toasters.

And the rest were just like, what is this?

Did they enjoy themselves?

You know what?

I've done worse shows.

Like, I think I really captivated the people who had no idea, like, who I am or what I was doing.

You have to know who you're talking to because if I'm in a toasty crowd, I can just be like, RDH, and everybody like, Yeah.

But, like, if I'm in front of normal human beings and they're like, RDH, like, what?

You have to like explain it.

Yeah.

So, not to make this whole Celine Dion shutdown about myself.

I just do have a lot of theatrical experience.

Sorry.

But the good news is her world tour is still scheduled to resume on March 9th.

So, So she'll be back on the road if you want to go see her.

I mean, I'm following her around for sure.

Yeah.

It's crazy that that was the last concert that I've been to.

So she's going back out on March 9th.

We literally went to her concert on March 5th.

It will be two years that she'll be

off the road.

That's insanity.

I'm so excited to get to a concert.

Like, that's really what I miss most

in life.

You're not going to come to Luke Homes like next month, right?

No.

And that kills me.

I'm going to have to go.

I'm going to have to throw your phone out.

Put my phone in a drawer and like not ever look.

Like, I will literally have tears in my eyes.

Every time Snitch goes to a concert that, like, I would, you know, have wanted to go to, it is the hardest thing.

That's the only thing that gives me FOMO.

And that's like what I'm so looking forward to doing when I can.

Yeah.

I mean,

not to rub it in.

I'm so fucking excited for Luke Homes.

Two nights.

We're going on both nights at Madison Square Garden.

I'm so proud of my friend, Luke, for me.

First of all, allowed to talk about it.

Okay, fine.

That's fair.

That's fair.

Like, you

when I'm not on the show, talk about it.

It's just that is going to

look at you, mean.

What?

I just.

It's going to break my heart.

Did I say what you said?

I couldn't talk about it.

I didn't say one word.

I just made an excited gesture to the camera.

I'm allowed to be excited.

Okay, I'm done.

Okay, next story.

Kristen Cavallari is calling her split with J.

Color, probably the best decision that she ever made.

On Caitlin Burt Stowe's podcast.

Yes, Kristen Cavallari went on Off the Vine and she is opening up about her split with Jay Cutler saying it was probably the brightest and saddest time of her life.

She said there's been times over the last 18 months where I'm like, is this the right decision?

Jay and I actually went on a couple of dates like months and months and months ago.

She was like, we did, but then I was like, it's not there for me anymore.

So I guess they split up and then like she was having second

thoughts.

And so she was like, let's see each other.

See each other again.

And it was like, nope, nope.

She said, the thing with Jay is is we aren't getting our divorce because of love loss which made it really challenging because we were crazy about each other and so i just decided i didn't want to be in a toxic relationship anymore and i had to break it off but that's made it hard and made me sit here and question it for a few months but then going back and dating him a little bit made me reaffirm it like no i know that i'm doing the right thing then also she talks about what we've been were talking about this week, like the divorce and her children and like what is the right path.

And she said that she wanted her kids to see her happy happy and believes that they're better off with their parents going their separate ways she said i don't want my kids growing up thinking that this is a good relationship because i got to see my mom get remarried and in a good relationship so i knew what one was right

so an interesting p of on this discussion yeah and she also was basically like if we didn't have kids i would never see this man again but like i have to and honestly that's that you know what she's so funny no because you know what like that did you ever see marriage story no is that what it's called yeah

what's that one on hbo right now now?

Scenes of a marriage.

Okay.

It was like these two people just fucking hated each other so fucking much.

And it's like you hate someone that much, you would never want to see them, but you have to see them every fucking day.

They're in your life forever.

They are in your family.

Divorce is so difficult.

Like I,

I can't imagine.

Like, and that's what she was saying.

Like, basically, I think she's saying he's a fucking nut.

And I've now come to, you know, realize that, and I never want to see him again.

Oh, but we share three kids and we see each other every day yeah that's why I didn't get to the part where she calls like alludes to that he's a fucking man well that's just what I gathered from the clips that I saw and from what you just said she said she was in a toxic relationship like

interesting interesting

I mean you know part of me will always ship what can I say no me too I thought they were a great couple and like they had a show her show and like even though he definitely like came off weird sorry that wasn't the fifth story I don't know why I'm putting

excited I I know.

It's always the best feeling when I can tuck it away.

Their relationship always came off as really funny and quirky on the show.

Not like other relationships.

Not like, well, probably like a ton of other relationships.

But it worked for them, you know?

And the fact that they were showing you that side of like Jay and her, it's like, okay, so that's good.

Yeah.

But it wasn't good.

You know?

Yeah, but you know what?

A-plus reporting from Caitlin Bristow.

Yeah.

Great guest, great questions, making news.

You'd love to see podcasts.

Making news.

making headlines you absolutely do are you ready now for our fifth and final story is it delivery outside the door for us yes it's a stove it's a stove oh i think i know what that is oh i know what that is it's a new sponsor and it's fucking sickening oh wow it's a like an outdoor fire pit Shut up.

Obviously not for, we won't be in the middle of the day.

We can use it in the studio right in front of us.

But isn't that cool?

That is cool.

We'll tell you guys about it when it's time.

When we get the promo code.

Our fifth and final story, we're just going to go right into it because there's going to be a lot of music in this story.

But wait, what?

Yeah, we're just going right in because I already went in.

Okay.

We're getting our first look at Traji P.

Henson as Miss Hannigan and Annie Live.

It's been a few weeks since we got an Annie Live update.

And now we are seeing Miss Hannigan in her.

Oh, my God.

She looks great.

We will post this to our Instagram.

Is Annie a Christmas movie?

No.

Why is she holding a Christmas ornament?

Well, it's coming out December 2nd, and maybe Annie does celebrate Christmas at the Warbrooks's

Santa Claus.

What's that?

Who's he?

That was like a good orphan voice.

Amazing.

Yeah.

So this is really exciting just because I think it means like more Annie content coming soon.

It's been a while since we've got excited about Annie, even though...

You know what?

It's my job to be honest with you.

I know that we have overhyped this.

No, nothing I was going to say.

I just think I've lost a lot of the joie de viv that I had for Annie.

I did too.

Once we started telling other people about it and other people were.

And hearing it out loud.

Yeah.

Like not within the confines of this studio.

They were like, that's.

They were like Nicole Scherzinger?

Nothing of the sort.

From the Pussy Attiles?

Why not Hugh Jackman?

Literally.

So I agree.

I've definitely lost some of my zest for Annie, but I want to get it back because it was exciting to be excited about something.

And when is it?

Big way.

When and where is it premiering?

December 2nd on NBC, Annie Live.

Annie Live.

We're going to give it.

We should do like a live stream while we watch it.

Like, we've talked about it for so fucking long.

I know.

We have to like go on Instagram live and watch it separately, like in our Christmas vajras.

We have to do something special for it.

Yeah.

Because

we should host like a screening, like at a bar.

Oh, you can't go to a bar.

That would be really sad.

No, Jackie, I'm telling you, it would be the best night of our lives.

We would all sing along, you know?

Yeah.

I just want any.

Son will come out tomorrow.

Picture bottom dollar that tomorrow.

And then all the toasters would be like, there'll be sudden.

Yeah.

I just hope that if anybody is watching who's responsible for Annie Live, like please make it good because we have a lot riding on this side at this point.

Emotionally, physically, yeah.

I just

don't know if I can handle it.

I don't know if I can handle a big letdown like that.

Okay, well, those are the past five stories, and I feel as though you needed to know some of them.

Yeah, you needed to know

none of them.

You won't get it.

You needed to know that Lala and Randall, there's still hope.

And we've got our TV recap, which is chock full of goodness, which is brought to you by Current.

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Great.

Okay, let's talk about only murders in the building.

Okay, okay.

Because a 10th episode premiered.

We know who killed Tim Kono.

Spoiler.

Spoiler.

Spoiler.

There were

major spoilers here because the show is over and now we're going to be talking about it.

Okay, so Jan's a killer.

And to be honest, like, I really did see that coming.

And even like last week's episode, when it was like, she's not the first bassoonist and they found the bassoon cleaner, I'm like, there must be some sort of explanation.

And then it really did turn out to be her.

And she was a very good actress, like, very diabolical.

Loved it all.

Loved the ending, like him being on the drugs.

And honestly, when he stood up out of that hysterical so funny um but the thing is with this show is like I honestly don't even care who like when you watch a thriller like I was just watching clickbait and I could not wait to get to the end I'm like how does this show end I don't even care like I just love watching these people like you know go on this journey like I'm not so invested in like who did what and now I'm I see people trying to like put together well who killed bunny if

He was wearing the sweatshirt and she stumbled in like I don't care like I just can't wait for next season to see the gang get back together.

Yeah.

So, I loved the way that it ended for two reasons.

I thought that the murderer was very like a satisfying ending and it made a lot of sense.

And also now watching it back, there were so many clues.

And, you know, especially because like once we found out he was poisoned and, you know, they do say poison is a women's weapon.

So we should have been able to like narrow it down.

So I think that felt very satiating that like.

That was a good killer, makes sense, wraps it up nicely.

Someone that we know, not just like some far-friend character that they throw in.

So that was great.

And then two, it opened it up for season two.

I thought maybe this was just going to be a limited series, but now we're going to get more murders in the building.

I would have loved to have seen like some of the podcast success.

Like,

did they get a sponsor?

No, like, is Oliver in good financial standing?

Right.

Because the Demises obviously aren't sponsoring the show anymore.

So he got that 30K from Teddy Demis.

But then for their finale, like, they should have sold it for like, you know, at least 50K.

And like, I just need Oliver to keep his apartment.

No, I know.

And like now they're like

under arrest.

So I'm like, are they going to be able to operate their business?

And like now, Tina Fey's like coming in trying to steal their podcast.

Like I'm making a podcast about them.

But like it was their thing.

Yeah.

I mean, I'm sure they'll get out and they'll do their podcast

in season two.

I just want to, I just, I'm worried about their financial standing for you too.

Not Brazos.

Not Brazos.

When he was like, I'm doing stage sips.

I was like, yes, Brazos.

And then the handkerchief.

I'm like, oh, no, Brazos.

And it was just a very exciting show.

I loved it.

Yeah, it was so good.

It was so well done.

It was so funny.

Selena Gomez was amazing.

Like, I just have a whole new

outlook on her.

Same.

And she's such a great actress.

And she's just a great gal.

Like, I was just loving her.

I followed her on TikTok this morning.

Like, I love Selena Gomez.

Yeah.

I never thought I'd say that.

But she hasn't been doing that much promo for the show because I was looking at her Instagram.

She doesn't really talk about it.

Literally.

Like, if I were her, I would be shouting from the rooftops.

This is a work of art.

This is the best thing she's done in years.

If ever.

It's also the best show in years.

So the fact that it's her thing, it's so cool.

And there's just really something to be said for Steve Martin and Martin Short putting out, I know they've accomplished so much.

This is one of the best things I've ever seen them in.

And, you know, they're both well into their 60s.

Like,

you just love to see two comedians killing it.

And it's just so contemporary, like an on the nose and like, you know, the podcast element.

It just really and then do it in a cringy Emily and Paris way.

It's hard for shows to like capture the essence of a lot of these like new age things.

And they did it in the best way that I've seen.

So I love books and shows and movies that are about podcasts.

It just gives so much credence to the art.

It gives so much

credence to the art.

I couldn't say it better.

I don't know why I was trying.

Okay, so I'm like sad sad it's over, but I really, that was just like a fun journey, and I might even watch it again.

Like, yeah, and you know what?

I did watch it like two every two weeks, like episodically.

And it kind of makes it more, even though it's frustrating, you just want to know what happens, it does make you do feel more involved than when you binge it.

And like, because even last night, I realized I had two episodes to watch, and like, I was like binging it so that we could talk about it today.

And it's like

when you binge something, you do sort of like miss out on how you feel between episodes.

Like,

where who you thought did it before you knew this?

Like,

it's nice to have some time to reflect and it becomes more

in your head.

Yeah,

for sure.

Van Pump Rules.

So, here's the thing.

Oh, wait, I want to ask you about last week's episode because do you agree with me about James and Markel?

Yeah, I think they're so fucking cute and nice.

And, like, honestly, I just don't understand why he keeps saying it's a Tiffany's ring when it's not from Tiffany's.

It's like a Tiffany's diamond from his friend.

So I just need more clarification.

I'm sure Andy will dive into that at the reunion.

He asked them on Watch What Happens Live, still no clarification.

They maintain that it's a Tiffany's diamond with a setting from his friend.

So what's a Tiffany's diamond?

I don't know, like maybe it's like secondhand.

Oh.

That's the only thing, like, you know, not that he got it like from the real real, but like...

No, but like a vintage ring that was from Tiffany's and you had diamond is fine and you had it reset.

And then he had it reset.

That's a

perfectly reasonable.

But the thing is, they didn't explain it that way, so maybe that's not the case.

That's the only thing I can think of that makes this like logical.

That's a great explanation.

They should go with that.

I think they're great.

I think that the

proposal was so sweet and really beautifully done.

I don't understand why Tom Sandoval paid for half of it.

And like, when him and Ariana were having that conversation, is she saying like now she will get married?

I think she was saying, like, if he did all of that, she would say yes to an engagement.

That doesn't necessarily mean she wants to get married.

Yeah.

Yeah, I just like, I just cannot stand Tom Sandoval.

He was probably the worst version of himself.

I think, I don't think he's ever looked worse in an episode than last night's episode.

I think the last time he looked that bad was at Sassi's book signing where he was an animal.

And you know what?

Who came out of the hero of last night's episode?

Ariana.

Ari fucking Ana.

Because you know what?

Of course, I love people who like stand by their man.

But you know what?

Sometimes your man needs to be told that he's being wrong.

And when it comes from Ariana, I do think it holds a lot of weight as opposed to coming from Katie or Tom.

Now, the woat of the episode is Tom Standable, but it's also Tom motherfucking Schwartz.

I cannot stand this man.

I don't know how Katie does.

Like, if my husband ever threw me under the bus, a fraction of the amount of times that Tom Schwartz does, I would sock him in the face.

First of all, second of all, that conversation was so painful.

Like,

basically, what Tom's trying to say is like, I don't feel comfortable working with you on the restaurant because in the past, you've proven that you send mean text messages.

Yeah, or that like you're unprofessional in professional situations.

But first of all, like, that's the show.

That's That's the job.

And it hasn't been that heated and crazy for years.

And also, you should fucking hope that your restaurant is relevant enough to bring in the sort of drama.

Tequila Katie.

Yeah, no.

And like, if that's what's going, if what happened in the last six years is going on at your restaurant, that means your restaurant is a success.

And you know what?

I just feel like it's so unfair of Tom to like be throwing, yes, she was.

Katie was problematic a couple years ago, and I think she would admit that.

Like, Tequila Katie, she was like getting really angry when she was drunk and like being mean.

And I feel like she doesn't do that anymore.

So to bring something up, Ariana was literally like, you're talking about something that happened six years ago.

It's irrelevant.

It's so unfair.

Like if somebody's making progress and like you're bringing up this old thing, like that's not fair.

I actually hate when people do that.

It bothers me so much.

Right.

As if people can't grow and change and that even if they do, it doesn't matter.

They're always going to be

thinking it.

By your worst moment.

And everyone on that show has had completely awful moments.

Like if that's, if we never moved on from them.

And that's really one of the things that so makes the show work so well weirdly, is that they do these awful things to each other, to themselves, and then Tabula Rasa, they're really able to move on from it.

So if you want to get stuck in the mud from six years ago, that doesn't work on this show.

So you told me that they came up with a different name.

What was it?

I did.

Did someone else tell me that?

Every week on Watch What Happens Live, Andy asks everyone who's on the guest like what they should name it.

Did you not tell me that they had a name?

I don't know.

Well, they came to me.

Whiskey Tom?

I don't know.

Tom and Whiskey.

Some people were suggesting that it be called called like

Cariana.

Cariana, something with the girls' names.

And then Tom Shannon.

I'm sure Tom Sandoval will love that.

Oh my God.

Katie Maloney suggested Once Upon a Tom.

Oh, that's what you told me.

And that's cute.

That's so cute.

You know what?

Katie is actually a great businesswoman.

She grew up in restaurants.

She like runs her own successful business.

She's very good with digital.

She takes lots of photos.

She's very artsy.

I don't think that her being involved would be the worst thing.

And honestly, this whole situation would go away if Tom Schwartz like had any balls.

He'd be like, this is my wife.

It's our business.

She's obviously being involved.

Fuck off.

He's so annoying.

And the dynamic between the two of them, like it used to be like this cute thing when they were just like a

C-line plot of the show.

But now that it's A-line, and it's like when they were sitting in Palm Springs and Tom Schwartz was like, You did such an amazing job on the ratchet.

I'm going to give you the name.

I was like, Yuck.

Okay, that was so unbelievably lame.

And also, this like thing, Tom Sandoval being extra and came over with that basket like full of vagina candles.

Like,

and the face mask, so he didn't.

That's not a personality trait.

I'm sorry,

the show

is being ruined for me.

Like, I could not, I can't.

Like, so for me, like, the Rachella stuff and like him being so extra about James's engagement, and then like when it all went well, he was like, We did it.

It's like, you know, it had nothing to do with this.

It was really weird.

It was so weird, it was so losery, and also, like,

he thinks that he is the main character,

He is single-handedly ruining this show.

It's shocking to me.

Like, it's so fucking cringy.

I want to jump out of my skin.

I know.

He's awful.

Like, really?

Awful.

And then, so, not only does he do, so if he wants to, you know, spend $12,500 on James's engagement while also taking like a mortgage out on his house, I can't watch people who make such dumb financial mistakes make those financial decisions.

Like, that's one thing.

But then he also acts like an absolute psychopath later in the episode to Katie.

And now I'm like, oh, okay, so you're annoying and you're evil.

Goodbye.

No, and it's like, you're actually making really bad decisions.

Like the name, the finances, like you're like, actually, if there's any reason that this restaurant isn't like successful or taking off yet, it's because you are in charge.

Like that's why.

So to come at Katie, who's just trying to be helpful, and I get it's annoying when like, when you have ideas and someone like is being constructive and it's just like basically tearing your ideas down, but a bad idea is a bad idea.

Also, they have TomTom, which is like a swanky West Hollywood joint that's named after them.

If they want this new restaurant to be a little bit different and stand apart, like they should incorporate their wives.

They should make it like if so, it's like Lisa would always say, and I actually thought it was a good reference, she would say, Villa Blanca is where you take your wife, Sir is where you take your mistress, Pump is where you take your boyfriend, and then I think Tom Tom would be where you take your girlfriends.

Yeah.

And

Once Upon a Tom should be where you go on double date.

Like, where, you know,

group fun.

So

he should be leaning into things that make this different from Tom Tom because I don't know that there's that enough to go around in this day and age of people who want to go to Tom Tom part two and they just.

After Sir and Pump and Vilma.

And then people who want to go to Tom Tom, but like couldn't get in that night.

Yeah.

No, I mean, this restaurant storyline is actually so uninteresting just because Sandoval's taking it over.

But the Sheena and Brock thing is actually really interesting.

And like, I do feel really bad for Sheena.

And also, like, I kind of like like Brock.

Like, I think that he brings good energy.

And I do think he's 100% right about Sheena's mom.

Like,

I get that it's your mom, but like, if we're paying someone on salary, like, I can wake up early and go to the gym and play pickleball because we have someone on salary.

Like, and it's just awkward that it's Sheena's mom, but like,

that's what it is.

Yeah, that, that didn't bother me so much about him.

I mean, I said that last week, like, him going to play pickleball and like, he, because he's, like, striving to win and.

do his best with the group was cute to me.

Cute.

Cute.

Like, but so I actually really did side with him on like the Sheena's mom stuff.

And obviously, it's fucking weird that he hasn't seen his kids in four years.

And like,

I guess, okay, two years under the pandemic, so like two years.

But he moved to

America to have a better life.

Like, he wasn't living like in the desert.

He was living in Australia.

No, and also, he they said he moved to America to have a give a better life to his kids.

But like, is he

sending money home to Australia?

Is his wife, former wife, accepting money?

Because she has a new husband.

I don't know who's married and who's not, but

is their money being exchanged?

Otherwise, you're just in America for yourself.

Yeah, it feels like he moved to America and is relieved of the fact that his ex-wife has a new husband.

He really filled in like the step dad role and the kids are being taken care of.

Yeah.

But like, it's bizarre.

And I really want to like him.

Like, I actually think he's like funny.

And I like when he, like, when he was talking about how his thighs are so big at Soul Cycle, like, I, like, I think he's very different and interesting, but I cannot get past this.

And Lala's 100% right to like to be telling Sheen all this because I know Sheena doesn't want to hear it, but Sheena knows that she's right too.

Yeah, and how strange about summer and winter.

Oh my god.

Lala was like, if my husband ever left and named her his kid Lake, it's so weird.

It's crazy.

And like Sheena's lying that she always wanted to name her kid Summer because we know she wanted to name her kid Madison Marie Parks Valletta.

But she said that that was Rob's name.

That's what she said on Watch What Appens Live because of course like Andy asked her.

Do you see James and Raquel on Watch Rapids Live last night?

I watched, like, up until the first commercial break, and they were, they were doing a lot.

First of all, Raquel found her voice.

She said that Katie is getting involved in the business because she's bored at home.

Not good.

That's also just like not correct.

Not good.

And she is a very successful podcast.

She also said that

they were just like completely team Tom, the two of them.

And of course, they have to be.

They were asked about Lalan Randall, and James said he really didn't know anything.

But every time like andy asked a shady question which it should just be called shh like watch shady with no love happen live

watch shady happen live and james like always like

hesitated was like about to give like the shady answer and then like said the nice thing because i don't think he wants issues with la la yeah but like there's something something there yeah oh i mean like i really do like james and raquel and you know tom sandoval is actually so far up james's ass of course james would be on his side um

I'm so team Katie.

Like it hurts.

Yeah.

No, I'm so team Katie this season just on every level.

Like of course she's being hilarious.

She's being hilarious like no one wants to be there, least of all her.

And she's just giving us everything by giving us nothing.

But you know what?

It was really interesting just to hear even Lisa

mention Stasi and Jax and Brittany.

Like it was crazy because and you know what?

I think a lot of us have wondered like if Katie wants kids and it's really I'm like really sad for her that she like had spent a lot lot of COVID trying and never got there and it's just like people are so annoying when they ask that question but hearing Lisa like even just speak of like the dead cast members I'm like what it was crazy it was shocking and I was like I was glad that she said it because it's like we're all thinking it obviously it's not it's one thing if it was just Sheena and Lala like those aren't even Katie's closest friends but when you add in Brittany and Sassy yes everyone around her did just have a baby and we just do need to acknowledge that yeah in telling the whole story yeah I thought that was and then also they were referring back to Sassy's book signing.

Like it was just crazy to hear her name.

Yeah,

it was.

Okay, so that was Vanderprim Pearls and then impeachment, Jackie.

It's so fucking good.

And last night's episode was the part where like the media takes on Monica and it was so sad and it really got me thinking like two things one How wonderful that there was no internet because she was glued to the television like watching late night and like it's so crazy because this was like not even long ago and the things that like Jay Leno and like Dave Letterman who everyone's like Dave Vetterman the things they were saying like were so fucking fucking evil.

And it's just, it's not even like it was that long ago.

But the fact that there was no internet is such a blessing for Monica.

Like, I can't imagine how much worse it could have been.

But, like,

they, they did an SNL skit about Monica and Linda.

And, like,

Linda was like this heavy woman, and like, John Goodman played her.

And, like, you just see Linda, like, Linda's the fucking worst, but like, you see her in her house watching John Goodman pretend to be her.

And, like, it's so sad.

So, while it's crazy, I mean, it's so much better that it happened without the internet, I do think a lot of the shit that, you know,

that flew back in the 90s would never have flown today.

Like the narrative, there's basically being like, you know, Monica's legs, Monica this, Monica that.

When it's like, no, Bill, Bill, this, Bill, that.

Yeah.

So I think that, like, it would have been better if it had happened now, but it also would have been worse because of the internet.

So it's like more content, but the narrative would never have been like, you know, Bill Clinton could get any man in the world and he wanted Monica, like gross, like shit like that.

And it was just, Beatani did a really good job.

It's, it was actually a really sad episode.

That's making me really sad.

They put on, like, on the TV, like the real SNL skit.

I had never seen it.

Molly Shannon played Monica and John Goodman played Linda Tripp.

And it was actually really sad to watch.

And Beanie, Monica, like,

couldn't get off.

She had to watch everything.

She couldn't stop.

And it's just so good.

Like, I really recommend it.

There's three more episodes.

I'm going to try and like batch them up, but I'm just, and Ben is hooked.

I'm going to, I'll watch watch maybe when there's two left so that I can like come in slide right into home that's nice

um so that's really all she wrote do you have anything else you want to say before my departure I'm heading to Roma no we wish you safe travels we hope you're having a great time we look forward to seeing all the content that Abe captures for you thank you so much and just you know enjoy your your time off and enjoy hosting with Ben it's always a roller coaster it's full of highs and lows that it is you know what I do not envy you because when I host with Ben people like say the meanest things about me.

Yeah, but that's different energy.

Yeah.

You know?

Well, I'm excited to watch you and Ven.

I think it'll be great.

Yeah.

And I'll be back on Tuesday, but Jackie will be back tomorrow, our stable queen.

And thank you so much for listening to the Morning Chose Millennium Morning Show where we deliver the thousand sex stories that you need to know every Monday through Friday on YouTube.

So if you're watching this on YouTube, please feel free to subscribe, give this video a thumbs up.

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So Spotify, Integration, Stitcher, Public Radio, IR Radiocast Box, all the places we have listened to podcasts by using Morning Toastmaster, Fast Radio, what a beautiful, stunning, and sparring we are.

Wow, that was the fastest I've ever done it.

Yeah.

If you made it to the end of the episode, why don't you drop an an emoji on our most recent Instagram?

How about the bowl of spaghetti in honor of my trip to Italia?

And I'll bring you back some spaghetti.

Love you guys.

Bye.

Bye.