S3 Ep173: To Top Sheet Or Not To Top Sheet: Friday, October 23, 2020

Good morning, Millennials, to everyone except Claudia.

Oh my God.

Jackie woke up on the wrong side of the bed because Theo wanted to sit with me today instead of her.

That's not what happened.

You guys all saw.

Literally, as we were counting down, Theo's here.

Like, he's lost his courage about jumping up, so I was tapping him to get him up, you know, trying to instill some confidence in him.

And Claudia just, like, summoned him over there, just ripped him right out from under me when I haven't sat with him all week.

And he matches my outfit.

The thing is, is that Theo sits where he wants to sit.

And like me tapping would not have, if he wanted to sit with you, me tapping would have done nothing.

I feel like I've actually done that before.

I let my son choose his own destiny and his destiny included sitting next to me today.

And I'm certainly not going to hinder on that.

You being his mom, like he went to go play over here and then mom was like, come back here.

And he's a good son and he obeys orders.

So he doesn't.

He ran back

and

he didn't hang with the aunties.

And I just, it was hurtful.

Happy Friday, everyone.

Friday, Friday.

We've been waiting four days for one.

It's today.

Enjoy it.

Relish it.

Savor it.

Savor it.

Yes.

Happy Friday.

Last day of waking up early.

Today was a rough one waking up.

And because it's a little bit like moody here in New York, I was just like, you know, the feeling of like being snuggled under your covers.

Yeah, you know, I went to bed in New York City, but I woke up in Moody's Point.

And that's crazy.

Also, like, as someone who suffers from RLS, like the morning is when I'm in the least amount of pain.

So I was just like.

I heard that you had an enormous amount of outreach from the RLS community.

I had an enormous amount of outreach.

And then I also had outreach about the outreach.

People being like, what were the suggestions?

Like, I have RLS too.

And so I got a lot of people telling me to take magnesium supplements.

I had a lot of people telling me to take iron supplements.

So then I said I was going to do those things.

And then I got a lot of people telling me that iron makes you constipated.

Watch out.

Your body doesn't produce it naturally.

So I'm like, okay, never mind, not taking those.

But you don't actually eat a lot of meat.

I feel like you actually could benefit from taking iron.

I feel like you bruise like a peach.

Yeah.

and I could also benefit from eating more meat.

So I'm just going to keep that in mind.

But I don't think I'm going to take the iron.

I think the magnesium should help.

And then also, they said that crossing your legs is harmful for the RLS.

Yet here you are.

So I need to be like uncrossing my legs, but like, I don't know how to sit on this show.

Cross your ankles.

No, but like.

That's nice.

Cross your ankles.

That's what I do.

Sometimes I don't like sitting with my legs crossed, but you literally just can't like spread your vagina all over the couch.

That's not that bad.

So I cross my ankles.

It's very elegant.

That's what the queen does.

She doesn't even cross her, she doesn't even cross her legs.

Yeah, I cross my legs so tight.

Sometimes they like wrap around each other.

I know.

But I have to like have to give my legs to get a person thing because I could barely get one leg over the other.

Gotta give them a break.

Okay.

I'm gonna try the ankles.

We have a fabulous show for you guys today.

You know, it's a big Friday in the pop culture industry.

Tons of new music.

I just would be remiss,

devastated, and even heartbroken if I didn't mention the new Luke Holmes deluxe album songs.

So his album, which came out a year ago.

Yeah, in November.

Wow.

I can't believe that was a year ago.

Was fabulous.

And now we got his deluxe version with five new songs, one of which we have already heard, and one of which is Forever After All, which he released the bridge of on TikTok a few months ago, which was such a brilliant marketing move.

People have used it like for all their like wedding videos.

And now we have the full song.

And sometimes when an artist releases the song on TikTok, you can't help, you've hyped it up so much, you can't help but be disappointed.

Seven Summers got leaked on TikTok, Morgan Wall and Seven Summers, and like people were furious that it it wasn't as good, even though I think it's great.

And this song just like lived up to the hype, and then some.

It's so beautiful.

It's like the perfect country song.

It's the perfect love song.

All the songs on Luke's new,

it's so funny.

Like, I don't really relate to any of Luke Holmes' music.

Like, my favorite song, besides Forever After All, of the new songs that he released, is called Blue Collar Boys.

No, well, so that's what I was going to say.

The new song is

My Kind of Folk.

It's all about people who go to church and then wake up on Monday, go back to work, then they fish on the weekends.

And it's like, can't relate to anything on this level.

Like, don't go to church, don't fish.

I've never seen a deer in my life.

But I'm like, my kind of,

like, and that's how I feel.

His other song, Blue Collar Boy.

There's guys

like us, blue collar boys.

And I'm not a blue-collar boy, but you're a white-collar criminal.

Literally.

I'm a white-collar criminal.

No, I really am.

Not a blue-collar boy, and I am fucking obsessed.

And I'm singing that song, Blue Collar Boy.

Like, that's what Luke comes out to you.

And I think that's what a good artist does.

Transcends, you know,

societal boundaries.

Thank you.

Thank you.

You're welcome.

And then we also have new music from Ariana Grande.

Which we have one person in our comments who is RDH.

If they don't let us know that we have to talk about it.

For the last few days, we like haven't mentioned it because, like, I don't know.

Ariana Grande releasing a new song.

Like, I don't know if that's newsworthy.

No, here's the thing.

We actually did make it a story last week when she tweeted new music was coming and we're like, our AG6.

And it started like this whole conversation.

That's Selena Got Mess.

And so we talked about the fact that she said she had new music coming, but the new music hadn't come yet.

What do you want us to talk about?

The song dropped today.

It's called Positions.

And Claudia and I have some differing opinions.

I was just watching the music video and I thought it was so cute.

Cute.

And Claude is just not impressed.

No, it's not that I'm not impressed, but to me, Ariana Grande is

unequivocally maybe tied with like Adele and Beyonce, like the greatest vocalists of our generation.

And I'm just constantly like, and the music she puts out is not bad by any means, but it's good for someone like a Bibi rexa do you know what i mean i know she's always my example and i fucking love bib rexa and i don't know why i keep like putting her down but i don't know i just i really expect a lot from ariana grande and i feel as though her old music used to deliver way more than her current music does like one last time break free vocasoda you know like

those songs were so um powerful and I feel like really highlighted her vocals and now she's like in this whispery tone and it's like it's just it's good it's not bad music by any means I'm just like I have very high standards for her and currently I'm not impressed.

Okay, I think that's a fair assessment, though.

I liked the song.

I thought the video was so cute.

Her looks were so on point.

And I love to see a little glamour.

Yeah, no, I like, I love people who

like invest in their music videos and don't just do music videos because like that's what celebrity pop stars do.

Yeah, music videos are important to Ari and they have like the past few have been really, really good.

So she has set the bar high for her own music videos, but I just like miss the time.

Like imagine if she put seven rings out now and like it would fall so flat.

Yeah.

Because it's literally like all about material items.

Like I just miss like the world that we used to live in.

The materialist Super O was like, whoever sent money can't solve your problem.

No, totally.

Yeah.

Yeah, I bet it's hard to like release music in this day and age.

Like what do people want?

No, I know, but that's why like we're getting this vibe now.

I feel like Justin Bieber's new song hits the nail on the head, lonely.

Literally the past three three nights into bed, Ben is literally,

it's so annoying.

He likes just learned the song and he can't get it out of his head.

And he's like, literally, looking at me, and he's like,

Are you okay?

That is just so funny.

It's so annoying.

And then he's like,

I never heard you laugh like that.

He's also like, then being like,

And I'm like, Ben,

Ben doesn't really keep up with music, you know?

So I'm like, when he knows a song that just came out, it's shocking to me.

And he's like, I'm so low.

And I'm like, how do you know that song?

It's just, he doesn't keep up with.

Yeah, I didn't even know that was a song you could sing along with.

Oh, ask Ben.

You definitely can.

I will when I see him tonight.

Also, I made a statement a few days ago on the toast that I want to start implementing in my life, which is watching Jeopardy.

Okay.

And I, of course, forgotten to watch Jeopardy every single day since then because it's like at seven o'clock.

And at seven o'clock, I'm in a transitional period, like from daybed to night bed.

And it's just, I'm busy.

And I've realized now three days in a row, I forgot to watch Jeopardy.

But some of the collections are on Netflix and it's like a collection of winners.

So I'm watching this guy streak right now.

His name is John Hill.

He is the cutest, like geekiest, like dad ever.

I'm obsessed with him.

And I watched three episodes of Jeopardy last night.

And I'm telling you, I don't know if it was just,

I wanted to watch Jeopardy because I feel like I am dumb.

Like I don't know a lot about history or just like trivia or math or literature I just I wasn't good in school and I never like kept up with my trivia and I put on these three episodes and I don't know if maybe I was like just watching three episodes that were literally geared towards me but like Ben like my husband like thinks that I'm the smartest woman alive I must have gotten over three episodes like 15 to 20 answers it was crazy and some of them I was just guessing out of my ass they were like showed a picture of this building in LA billed by world-renowned architect and I literally know one architect I'm like Frank Lloyd Wright, and it was Frank Lloyd Wright.

Oh, yeah, you told us

about Frank Lloyd Wright.

Well, but you know what you should do?

No, but then even there was one about the Charlotte Bronte, there was a whole category, and I was like, Jane Eyre, because that's literally the only Charlotte Bronte novel I know.

Jane Eyre.

So Ben thinks I'm like so smart.

I just got to keep the ruse alive.

You know what you should do just to mess with him?

You should record an episode of Jeopardy, watch it, get the answers, and then like when it's Jeopardy time, like play yesterday's episode and have every single answer.

That's a great idea.

And he'll literally freak out.

And record record it for Patreon.

That's a great idea.

Yeah.

Okay, I like that idea.

No, I just honestly, I think that more people, more young people should be watching Jeopardy.

Okay.

And

I realized that Alex Trebek has the best job in the world.

Like, he literally sits there and does nothing.

And I don't even think he's reading the clues.

I think they're pre-recorded.

Because it has a lot of like foreign words that like he probably has to like practice.

pronouncing and i i think he pre-records the the hints interesting okay maybe I'll check it out sometime.

But as you know, my content plate is full.

Last night, I was reading Mariah Carrey's novel.

It is a certified novel.

Definitely.

And I just got to part two, which is called, I think, Sing, Sing.

So I think it's about like the first part was clearly about her childhood.

And now I think we're getting into her teenage years where she starts to rise to stardom.

So I was like, this is a good place to set it down for now.

And hopefully, I have a chance to finish it this weekend.

But it is just so good.

It is so good.

It is.

It is so good.

So good.

So good.

I got you.

Bump, bum, bump, bump, bump, bump, bump.

Um, so.

So, without further ado, is that what you're going to say?

Yeah, because we have the fast five.

We have a little kardashi.

I'll have to recap.

I have Kelly's Mindless News to share.

Yeah, we've got some shit to talk about.

So I think without further ado, it is time for the Fast Five stories that you need to know before you wake up and take a bite out of your morning toast.

And while that may be true, I would be remiss, devastated, and heartbroken.

Yes, a case of the RDH, if I didn't let everyone know that today's episode is brought to you by our Patreon channel.

What is Patreon, you ask?

Well, the Morning Toast is here Monday through Friday for free.

But if you're ever looking for more content, can't get enough of your two favorite gals, head over to patreon.com slash the morning toast.

It is our premier subscription service.

You can pay $7.99 to get five extra episodes every month from Jackie and I.

Those episodes are podcasts, they're vlogs, videos, anything, more behind the scenes, family members, Olivia, Ben, literally anyone you want.

It's fabulous.

It's a fabulous way to get more content and to support your favorite show.

Patreon.com the morning toast.

Once you sign up, you get access to all the episodes we've ever done, which now is like two years.

I think it's like over 200 episodes.

So it's a fabulous $7.99.

So check it out.

Patreon.com/slash the morning toast.

Sign on, get premium content.

And for existing patrons, we just posted a Patreon episode yesterday where we did what's in our bags.

And Claudia and I showed you like us weekly style, what we have in our bags.

Yeah, it's pretty shocking.

It's pretty personal.

Yeah, personal stuff.

Tampons.

Okay, first story.

Tyra Banks is slamming reports that she doesn't want real housewives on Dancing with the Stars.

This, okay, I saw the initial report saying that she said that.

Saying that she said that she's the host of Dancing with the Stars now, and apparently someone said that she said that she doesn't want housewives on the show.

And I just have to say, let's say Tyra Banks does feel this way.

She's a host.

She's not a casting producer.

I don't really think Tyra Banks has any say in who gets cast on the show.

Yeah, I would agree with that, but it's also not true.

Her longtime publicist said this is 100% untrue.

She's a huge fan of the Housewives, and everyone knows Tyra is a businesswoman first.

As a businesswoman, why would she say anything against the housewives?

She has nothing to do with casting.

We're told that Tyra even tried to just get one of her really good friends on the housewives.

She watches the shows, she loves them.

She's also familiar with Cynthia Bailey for modeling and even Marcel because she got her start on America.

She's like,

Oh, that's so interesting.

So I feel firmly that those reports were untrue and like make no sense.

Yeah, but it is an interesting jumping off point for Tyra in the Dancing with the Stars universe because this is her first season hosting.

We're about halfway through the season and I only watched the first few episodes of Dancing with the Stars and she seemed to have like a tough time finding her footing.

And I of course read people on social media and people on social media are just like automatically negative.

Like nobody's tweeting if they think Tyra's doing a great job.

Like they only tweet if they have something bad to say.

But I am curious to

see where it takes her.

Like is she going to do another season?

Would they ever bring back Tom and Erin?

Like, it was like a transition for them.

And I'm seeing an overwhelming amount of people who are unhappy with it, which is shocking because I love Tyra.

But I did see her stumble, you know, a few times.

Interesting.

I feel confident that she'll find her footing and that they will not bring back Tom and Aaron.

And

it will work itself out.

I hope they don't bring back Tom and Aaron.

I really don't.

Like, even though I was sad to see them go, To bring them back would just be stupid.

Yeah.

Have you been watching Dancing with the Stars?

No.

I watched until Carol Baskin got eliminated, I think, because I just, that's what I needed to see, like for my own soul.

But I've had a hard time keeping up because you know what?

It's the same as The Bachelor, two hours, once a week.

And then between that and The Bachelor, like, I need self-care.

Yeah, no, I hear you.

And they do a really good job of, like, not spoiling.

Like, I still don't know who's been eliminated because all of the stories about it, it's like,

guess who's been eliminated?

But they don't say it in the title and I don't care enough to click.

So like, I have no idea how it's going.

That's what they do with the masked singer, too.

Except that I know that Chris is still on because every week there's like a new story about who she's dancing for.

Yeah, in People Magazine.

Yeah, um, yeah, no, I agree with that.

They do that with the masked singer, too.

Like, when they make reveals, they never like.

I actually don't know one person who's ever been on the masked singer because I've never watched it.

Um, but there are a lot of claims.

There's a video going viral on TikTok.

People think they figured out it's Tori Kelly, and that's totally her.

How could it be Torrie Kelly?

She's literally a singer.

Like, I don't understand.

And that singer is singers.

No, but I feel like it's also like people that you don't expect to sound the way that they're sounding.

I think it's both.

Both.

Like, it's meant to be people.

Like, I could tell you, Tori Kelly's voice.

That's why I don't think it's her.

Her voice is too recognizable.

That wouldn't be like.

And Leanne Rhimes, people are guessing, because she sang a song, a Lizzo song, I'm crying because I love you.

And there's a video of her, like, in the past on her tour bus, like, performing that song with like her band.

And it sounds very similar.

Oh, I actually think she would sound so good on that.

Yeah, Leanne Rhimes, Rhimes, you know, all the drama with Brandon Glendale aside is actually a very talented songwriter.

I mean, this is vocalist.

Yeah.

I'm sure she's a talented songwriter too.

She is.

Interesting.

I can't get into the mass singer, but I'm sure I would like it if I did.

Hypothetically, I would like to get into it because the idea of like hearing someone sing and then being able to place a name, like a face to the voice is thrilling for me.

But the fact that every episode, it's like I watch the first episode and I still don't know who anyone is.

They don't reveal it.

It's too much.

I need instant gratification.

Like it's too much waiting.

I'm not that patient.

Yeah.

You should just binge old seasons.

Maybe.

But it's still like hours and hours just to find out it's Cody Simpson, you know?

Right.

Or it's Jordan, uh, Jordan Woods.

Um, okay, next story.

Some Scream Queens crew news, not about the reboot, which is apparently happening.

But Emma Roberts says it's witchcraft that Leah Michelle and Billy Lord and I are all boy moms.

Oh, and also I didn't realize that they all had like gotten pregnant and had babies at the same time.

That's really sweet.

And for boys.

Cute.

Emma Roberts joked that it's pure witchcraft that she will join her former Scream Queen's co-stars, Billy Lord and Leah Michelle, when she welcomes her baby boy.

I don't know how else to explain it.

It was not planned, she recently said on a serious XM show.

She's expecting a son with her boyfriend Garrett Hedlund from Claudia's favorite movie.

Two favorite movies, George World and Country Strong.

Yes, oh my God.

I think I'm just not realizing, is Garrett Hudlund my favorite actor?

He might be.

He's in my two favorite movies.

I know.

I just feel like he really should have been on Yellowstone.

Did you ever find it?

I was watching him.

I was great.

No.

I could not get into it.

He reminds me of Casey Dutton's character, like literal physical character.

Is that the brother who was living on the reservation?

Yes, reminds me just so much of Garrett Headland, and I just feel like he could have been up for that part.

Or like Taylor Kitch.

100%.

Yeah.

100%.

But back to the Scream Queens mamas.

Yes, you know, this is an exciting time to be a Scream Queen and a Scream Queen fam.

This reminds me of how like the Vanderpump Rules girls are like now all pregnant at the same time together, even though I heard them on a podcast say like it was somewhat intentional, like they did want to do it together at the same time.

But this is like so much fun.

I feel like motherhood, especially like your first baby, like can be intimidating.

Like to have like all your friends be going through it at the same time, that must be really nice.

Yeah.

And I really, I feel as though friend groups often, I don't think people realize that they do this, but like people keep in mind, like, I want to be pregnant around the same time that my friends are being pregnant.

Like I want our kids to, you know, I don't want to be the first one years ahead of the rest of my friends.

Like,

so I think this is kind of like a natural thing that some women do is what I'm learning.

Yeah, I think so too.

Very cool.

Very cool.

And cool for the kids.

Cool for the kids.

And then that makes sense why like when you were growing up, you had so many like family friends, which is basically.

And the kids are the same age as you can.

Right, because it's basically just like our parents were friends and then got pregnant like at similar times.

Yes.

It all makes sense now.

Okay.

Honestly, growing up is pretty much like understanding things that like your parents did and like realizing like everyone was probably drunk.

You know, like at all the dinners.

Like that's going to be me.

Yeah, that will be you.

I'm literally going going to need a nanny for the children and a nanny for me as well.

I just don't know how I can drink as a parent, like, with my hangovers.

It's not about the drinking.

It's about like the next two days being down and out.

I think when you go through childbirth, you become like a different person medically.

Do you know what I mean?

Like your body is so resilient that like a hangover is nothing.

I shoved a kid out of my pussy, you know?

Wow.

You know what?

I really hope that's true.

And it actually like...

scientifically makes it make sense 100% i'm not making this up yeah no it's once you shove a kid out of your regime you can handle a hangover.

You can literally get a headache and it's nothing.

And you just have more bandwidth physically, emotionally, mentally for pain.

For bullshit.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Interesting.

Okay, cool.

And that's your daily medical segment from Dr.

Fichemin.

Dr.

Fuchemin, I was actually sitting this morning thinking about like Dr.

Fichemin himself.

And I was just laughing so hard about how like he's like Dr.

Theo Fichemon based off of Dr.

Leo Speaker.

Fichemin from 30 Rock.

From 30 Rock.

And it just like cracks me up when I see it.

And he's Fichemin because he's such a face man.

No, we used to call him hi cute face man.

Yeah.

Man with a face.

Also, you know what I was doing this morning, sitting and laughing?

So somebody started a thread in the Toast After Dark, which is our only existing Facebook group and it's for Patreon members only.

It's a fabulous place.

Asking like when you first started listening to the toast, like what were your biggest misconceptions about it?

So a lot of people obviously didn't realize that me and Jackie were sisters.

A lot of people thought you and Margo were sisters and then me and Olivia were sisters and maybe we were cousins.

Yeah.

Just seeing what people thought was so funny.

A lot of people thought that Olivia owned the live method.

Yes.

The gym, which makes a lot of sense.

Makes so much sense.

It's so funny.

A lot of people, what were the other ones?

A lot of people thought that you're older than me.

Oh, of course.

Of course.

And a lot of people thought that Theo is a human son.

Yeah.

Claudia's.

People who listen to the podcast don't watch on YouTube.

For like the first couple months were just like assuming I had a son, like a human son.

Yeah.

Which I do.

So that's not a misconception.

They learned that Theo technically is a furry little friend.

Oh my God.

i love him so much i literally dreamt of him as he was laying next to me like that's claudia that's beautiful it was to like you know when like you dream about something and like sometimes it's a really good dream you almost want to go back in the dream but like imagine waking up in in the presence of your dream that's like stunning yeah it was pretty meaningful try not to be jealous i mean

you know where i stand i know like i'm putting on a good face i know i know that you hurt me i know i know i know i'm kidding but look how happy he looks like i I don't know if he was laying.

Yeah, no, he's at peace, and that's what I want for him.

And if he was laying with you, like, I just don't know if he would be that happy.

At the end of the day,

like, there's.

Everyone heard that, right?

Because I'm trying to remain positive and like, and just do what's best for Theo, and you're throwing daggers.

No, sorry.

I don't know.

I should have mentioned this.

I'm a comedian.

I make jokes.

Wow.

Hurtful ones.

Hurtful.

Painful ones.

Curly ones.

Big ones.

Another quote directly from my comedy special, Disgrace Queen, which I haven't promoted in a while.

Available on multiple streaming services.

You can buy it on Amazon Prime.

You can buy it on iTunes.

You could buy it on YouTube.

You could buy it on Apple TV.

Tons of places.

You could also rent it on all those places.

Check it out.

It's a fabulous product and one I'm really proud of.

And if you're looking for someone to watch this weekend, because we can't do anything, Disgrace Queen, Claudia Oshray.

Check it out.

It's available as an audio comedy album.

If you'd like to listen to podcasts, it's available on Spotify, Amazon Music, Apple Music.

You could also get it there.

It's the ultimate content upper.

Oh shit, I should have put it in our list a little self-promo.

We'll do a sequel to this.

Oh, because I had an addition to the list.

What?

Because I said so with Diane Keaton and Mandy Moore.

Literally the best movie ever.

Okay, and also I would like, and this would be a great segue into our next story, the Hannah Montana movie.

Okay.

It's a content upper for me because that's where I first heard the climb and it changed my life.

Yeah.

Our next story, Miley Cyrus announces her seventh album, Plastic Hearts.

She says, I found myself.

You guys, this is like our theory just like being proven, our hypothesis, which is like every new Miley album, like she's finally, she's finally the real Miley.

No, it's like, no, no, no, no, guys, this is it.

She is finally coming.

Miley Cyrus will release her seventh studio album, Plastic Hearts, on November 27th.

The pop star announced on Instagram Thursday night.

The new album will feature 12 original tracks, including her latest hit, Midnight Sky, as well as live covers of Heart of Glass by Blondie and Zombie by the Cranberries.

I can't see the cranberries without saying my Cranberry CD.

I think I left it in the quad.

Oh no, that's funny.

I gotta go before somebody snags it.

Really quickly, of all the most recent Miley Cyrus albums, which one did you think was really gonna be like, this is it?

Like, this is the true Miley.

This is the true Miley.

Um, well, I think, oh, there's so many.

I, I, I want to say younger now, but I felt like that was like kind of like Granny Miley.

I don't know.

I thought it was going to be um, she is coming, that one, mother's daughter.

Yeah, but then I guess it wasn't.

No, not at all.

But, and I don't, I'm consciously optimistic.

I actually think this might be like this rocker vibe she's going for, like this Joan Jett, mullet, heart of glass, I was born run I don't belong it's a really funny song oh no it's really good I think she might be getting closer to the real Miley and I think that's what it is like all these albums are like a step towards well I think that is you know a metaphor for life where you know every you're always evolving and changing and today is you are the youist you that you've ever been and but like to negate all of her previous work by saying like this is finally me right i don't think it needs to be like that i agree you know um i just And then, like, think back to Malibu when it's like, finally, we're seeing like Miley stripped down.

This is who she is.

Like, and now I just feel like she's always like

negating her old work.

No, it's like once the press and the promo and the, you know, the album has moved off the charts, like, she's on to another one.

Yeah, even, like, can't be tamed at that point.

Like, that was the real Miley.

She couldn't be tamed.

And, like, I really did feel like at that time, that was the real Miley.

She could be.

That was the real Miley.

I don't know what she should do because that album is fucking fire.

Agree.

She should make a Can't Be Tamed, like, like 2.0 and re-record it with like her new sound and you know all of her new vocal skills, it would be unstoppable.

Love or is it art?

Because the way you got your body moving, it's got me confused.

And I can tell if it's the beat or spark, spark, spark.

So many good songs.

She recently covered her own song, that song, at an iHeart musical festival, and it was amazing.

Every rose has its thorn.

Every rose, rose, every rose.

I know that's actually not her song.

It's Brett Michaels, but

I have to say, I do think this will actually

be probably the most successful Miley album in the last three or four for one reason, and that's because she

very organically has taken over TikTok.

Her Heart of Glass, the only reason she released Heart of Glass as an official single is because her performance at the iHeartRadio went so viral on TikTok that she capitalized on it.

Now her capitalized, now her cover of Why You you only ever call me when you're high,

also went viral on TikTok.

She's like engaging with the content and TikTok is known to make or break music.

And I think that TikTok is on her side.

So like I said, I'm very cautiously optimistic about this album.

And I will be listening.

And you know, I've been...

Very hard on Miley.

Like very hard artistically.

I just want the best for her.

And honestly, I don't think I've seen the best for Miley since Can't be Tamed album and a few songs on Younger now, but pretty much Can't Be Tamed.

And I've been very hard on her, but I think, I think we're getting close.

Yeah, I do as well.

And I'm glad that she's leaning into her covers.

Like, that is something that we always said.

She hits out of the park.

The backyard sessions are back.

And I think that's, you know, where Miley is the most Miley.

But we're going to find out who the Most Miley is on November 27th.

Yeah.

Wow, that's so far away.

It is, but it isn't.

I guess it's like a month.

No, I know.

It's just.

It's not as far away as Legally Lawn 3.

That's so.

Is that like our bar now?

Yeah.

Okay.

Yeah, because that was insane.

Insane.

Like, don't announce something two years in advance.

Like, I get anxiety when like I have to announce something.

Cause like, I think with my comedy special, I left too much time.

I announced five weeks before.

And, like, by the fifth week, I was, we were just exhausted.

I'm like, just fucking watch it.

Like, it's the timing.

And so to announce something, you really, it's like quibby.

You know, when you announce yourself so early, you kind of set yourself up for failure.

Yeah.

There's definitely a sweet spot of like excitement, hype, but then.

Enough time to give people to prepare, to purchase, to show up.

But then also I've moved on.

Exhaustion, yeah.

Okay, this next story is one of the funnier headlines I've seen.

Dave Portnoy denies hanging out with Ramona Singer.

This is the most strange 2020 headline I've ever seen in my life.

The Barstool Sports Honcho, also known as El Presidente, recently denied rumors that he and the Real Housers of New York star, Ramona Singer, previously hung out together in the Hamptons.

He responded via Instagram.

Drive away.

It's like so upsetting.

I'm going to sing till the sound of the siren is gone.

Yeah.

Okay, can you start again, please?

Yes.

The Barstool Sports Honcho, also known as El Presidente, recently denied rumors that he and the Real Housewives of New York star Ramona Singer previously hung out together in the Hamptons.

He responded via an Instagram message saying, who the fuck is Ramona Singer?

In the original claim, which was posted to Du Mois's Instagram story.

He He got a yes, Du Moy with the press.

Du Mois.

Ramona Singer was said to be at a Hamptons haunt some time ago, and Portnoy was in attendance as well.

Portnoy then doubled down in his Instagram message saying, no, I did not hang out with her.

Oh my God, that's so funny.

I mean, I feel like they don't run in similar circles, but they definitely hang out at maybe similar places, like upscale New York City brasseries and restaurants.

And also this summer in the Hamptons, perhaps.

Yes, they definitely have like walked past each other.

No, I just feel like they've been in the same room like not more than one, more than one time.

Yeah, I would agree with that.

So

when I first saw the thing on Dumois, like they were together at a restaurant, like Ramona was like flirting with this young guy.

I'm like, she might not have even known who he was, but like this is totally true.

That's hysterical.

And I feel like it's still very possible that they were like at the same restaurant and Dave Portnoy just like had no idea who this older woman was.

Yeah.

No, 100%.

I think they probably eat.

I think they have like the same taste in restaurants.

I agree, like elevated upscale dining.

You know what's so funny?

One time I saw Dave Portnoy at a restaurant.

Me too.

And it was Avra Madison, which is like one of Ramona's favorite restaurants.

It's one of like the Upper East Side ladies' favorite places to go.

So like they definitely have the same taste in cuisine.

I saw him at Il Molino, which is literally one block away, which is also like an Upper East Side ladies' luncheon type of place.

So I just think that Dave Portnoy appreciates like an Upper East Side luncheon.

Yeah.

And I respect that.

I respect it as well.

I just thought that was a hysterical headline.

No, it's so

like two people whose names you never thought would be in the same sentence.

Yet here we are.

Here we are.

In the same sentence.

Speaking of two people who are coming back to the same sentence, Chloe and Tristan were showing some PDA at Kim's 40th birthday party.

Now I know they have been previously chinaed, but I chose to un-China because I'm happy for them.

Okay, well, I'm not un-Chinaing them because I just, I'm, I get exhausted keeping up with relationships like this.

Like, if this was your friend, you wouldn't put up with it, so I'm not putting up with it with it from Chloe.

But I do want to talk about Kim's 40th birthday party and the special they put on this week.

So I'll let you discuss and then we can dive into that.

The couple attended the KKW Beauty Founders surprise bash, which was featured on Wednesday's episode of Keeping Up with the Kardashians.

At the party, Tristan was spotted kissing Chloe on the cheek while they posed for a picture in a photo booth.

It's unclear when the episode was filmed.

Yes, very unclear.

I would like to dive into that.

Me too.

But the...

party took place sometime after the duo reunited.

So in my head of like their relationship and like what I've made up in my own fan fiction, I feel like they reunited during and due to the quarantine.

Well, yeah, I think that you know Tristan did not make the NBA playoff, so he's been like out of the bubble for a little while, and in lockdown, you want to be with your family.

Yeah, so I think they were together for the quarantine, and I think that you know, maybe some sparks were flying.

Well, he like seemed to be like fun and like had a good attitude in the episode

for all the Kim birthday stuff, so I don't know.

I don't dislike him.

I know that I should, like, because he, like, because he did what he did.

Twice.

But I'm giving him like another chance.

I am, because I believe in second and I guess third chances here.

And, but, fooled me thrice.

Shame on me.

So I'm going to hold out.

I'm not shipping them by any means.

I just, like, want True to be happy.

I want Chloe to be happy.

And, like, if this could work out, of course, in an ideal world, I would, of course, want that to happen.

But it seems like it may not be able to work out.

Yeah.

When I was watching the special last night, I'm like, I was like, it must be really awkward for Kylie and Tristan to be in the same room.

You know?

Yeah.

I don't think that she could acknowledge or like move on in the way that everyone else has.

Like Kim and Tristan, it's so crazy.

She went from...

That was so funny.

Yeah.

Let's talk about the birthday special.

I liked, to be honest, when I thought, saw they were doing a 40th birthday special and they were all like sitting in those chairs outside in Malibu and like reflecting on old episodes.

Like I wasn't going to watch because I just thought it was like silly, but I didn't realize there was like this whole element with the birthday party.

And it was really, really sweet.

Honestly, I got like a little emotional because the Kardashians have this emphasis which I really really love and appreciate on just like memories and nostalgia nostalgia and like taking walks down memory lane and like the fact that like so many of their big milestones in life like include these like home videos and like recreating the diner like I just thought it was really really sweet and like when Kim got out of the car and like she didn't know what was going on and then heard her dad's voice like that that's just like It's beautiful.

Yeah, I agree.

One of my favorite parts of the episode having nothing to do with the emotions though was like we finally got a little clarity on that house with the staircase that everyone's been posting at all summer, the Malibu vacation house.

And it was absolutely beautiful.

And like the scenes of them just like sitting and eating and talking, like I wasn't even listening to what they were saying about like with Mindy and the planning.

Like I was just watching, like it was, I just love watching them eat.

Like the food looked so good.

The setting looked so stunning.

They looked so beautiful.

I was just like.

This is just enjoyable stuff.

The episode also felt like a major commercial for Mindy Weiss event planning because she just did such a good job and she got so much airtime like more so than usual.

Yeah, well, I'm sure like she did it for free and she got that car, even though it seems like they paid for the party because she was like, I hope it's okay.

We got the car because we already got it.

No, they definitely paid for it.

And then the Tao element was so fun.

Like Kim, Kim's like iconic Tao birthdays in Vegas are just like a part of Americana.

Like they really are.

Yeah.

And they just like.

It's like they don't, they're not obsessed with nostalgia like only from their childhood, like also from their 30s.

Like, it's so epic.

And that was just like such a cool, unique thing that only they could really do, like get Tau open open for the night.

For sure.

Also, when they were going down memory lane and you see like Kim cringing so hard at like things that she used to do and then you see like her now with Kanye and it's like she actually summed this up really well on Dave Letterman when she was like, we used to try so hard to like be famous and now we just try so hard to show you like we're just like you.

No, I thought that was a, I agree, a very interesting distinction because that's what the show was at first like photo shoot this, that, like, oh, I have to go to red carpet, but mom, Reggie Bush's thing.

Like, yes.

And now it's just like, hey, who's going to pick the kids up from school?

Yeah.

It's an interesting shift, but I feel it is all so organic.

That's why we like didn't realize that it was happening until it happened.

Watching the highlights of her and Kanye, just like, I was literally up staring at my TV screen.

Like, yeah.

It was so, so, so cute.

I just wish Kim would embrace her jam era a little bit more.

Like, she's her best.

She has so much shame associated with it, and it's such an iconic song.

And, like, it's not that bad.

And her voice, even when she's in the booth, really wasn't so bad.

Like, I've seen worse on reality TV.

and I just need her to embrace it turn me up turn me up yeah I feel like a few years ago she made peace with it but she doesn't want to be watching it no and I think that's why she doesn't like going on watch dragons live because Andy literally brings it up at every corner every time she's been on watch trains live

I can't I like I can't when she's like I literally can't look at this I can't listen to this like I know that feeling it's like when you watch yourself being cringy and you're just like in you know your own bedroom.

Yeah, of course.

The dress that she wore to her birthday party was absolutely sickening.

Like I never saw a dress so stunning in my whole life that like fit her so well.

Yeah, no, they did a great job with the logistics of getting her to look her best so that she would be excited for her party.

And when she, when they pulled her in for the dance, and she's just like is so awkward.

No, she's awkward, but so cute and so beautiful.

Like, I literally like was looking at her.

I'm like, this is my queen.

Like, yeah, I don't know.

I, yesterday, we talked about her on Dave Letterman, and I didn't think I could like feel any more like warmly towards her.

And then just watching the special, I was just like even more endeared I want to talk about the dance for a minute because I'm very hard on Courtney Kardashian what you're about to say is literally what I'm about to say I'm very very hard on her and to be honest like she was the only sister who put in so much effort I had a lot of respect for her for like I know it seems silly like it's a dance but it was an important part of the party and like she wouldn't let it go and none of the sisters wanted to do it and she ended up doing it alone and she didn't waver in her willingness to do it and she was like trying to rally everyone and I just had like I know it seems so silly but like I had a lot of respect for her in that moment.

No, I had a lot of respect for her in the whole episode.

episode she was really being like a big sister yeah and like the courtney that is the best sort of courtney they weren't fighting about work or this or that or poosh and you know yeah all this nonsense she they were just being siblings and she was being the big sis and like i

felt warmly towards her as well i think that of all of them courtney probably has had the most success like emotionally and mentally from lockdown like spending time with her kids not having to deal with like outside factors they can't film they can't do photo shoots and you know that's the stuff that doesn't make her happy and she just like wants to be with her family and that's what she's been doing for the last six months.

And there was definitely like a different vibe to her.

She was like lighter and funnier.

And she didn't seem like hostile towards anyone.

And it was a great Courtney.

Yeah.

A great Courtney.

I picked up on that as well.

It was a good special.

I liked it.

I'm ready to go back to regular episodes because like I need to see Chloe get the coronavirus, but well, not that I want to, but I just like want to see what happened.

Yeah.

So I'm ready to return to our regularly scheduled programming.

As am I, but it was a nice little treat, a nice content upper.

Before we wrap up today, I have a little news to share.

Do you?

Would you you say that it's mindless news?

It is a segment.

Or is it mindful?

No, no, it is definitely a segment of Kelly.

Kelly's mindless news like the 4th of July.

Now, I will post the proof on our Instagram.

As you always do.

But in the meantime, Kelly Rippa shares glimpse into unseen living room in the Hamptons with God in view.

So what do you think this means?

Like, you as an average reader.

Okay, so now that I'm getting keen to see.

No, no, no.

No, I'm saying it's a picture of Kelly in her living room where you could see bits of a living room and like out a window.

Okay no no but I want you like don't answer that way.

What would you you read this article you weren't oh of course I think it's like a carousel spread architectural dial digest style photos of a living room and a garden view.

Well you're wrong.

Kelly Ripa has a beautiful home in the Hamptons where she spends a lot of her weekends and the live with Kelly and Reinstar recently shared a glimpse into one of those into inside one of the property's many living rooms.

This spacious area has a monochrome theme, features a cream sofa as well as a table with gray chairs, and a black shelf filled with wine glasses.

The room has beige curtains and a large window overlooking the family's large garden.

Okay, so that's a decent amount of descriptors.

Table, chair, couch, drapes, window.

Show me the KMN.

What the fuck?

You're lying.

I swear it's a selfie, you guys.

Oh my god, you guys, this is, this is not even, and it's from an IG story.

It's not, it's not like a post photo.

It's not even what I thought it it was going to be.

I didn't know I could still shock you with the kids.

That was so fucking crazy.

No, I know.

I thought it was going to be a picture like in feed of her sitting on her couch with her living room looking pretty behind her.

Like still not cause for an news article, but it's KMN.

It is what it is.

You guys, this is crazy.

No, it's so disgraceful on behalf of Hello Magazine.

No, no, no.

That is so crazy.

But Kelly is encouraging people to register to vote, which everyone should do.

So if that's what we take away from Kelly's Mindless News, it's not so mindless.

It's not so mindless.

And that's all you could ask for for a segment of KMN.

A little mindfulness.

That's our show.

That's our week.

Anything you want to say before we depart for two days of alarm-free living?

No, I'm just so looking forward to getting to that place.

I was like in my bed this morning snoozing my alarm and I was like, this is the last time we can do it.

And I was like in there thinking like about, I was gotten to like a really delicious position.

Nothing better than delicious.

Because it's really like.

a crime of the world order that like when you go to sleep you can't get comfortable.

But when you wake up and you have to get up, you've never been more comfortable.

Beds feel so much better at 8 a.m.

than they do at 8 p.m.

Yeah, no, like, I don't know what the science is behind that, but it's not fair.

Why can't it be delicious when I get in and then uncomfortable when I have to get out, right?

It ain't right.

I was just like.

No, I know what you mean.

It's absolutely devastating.

I'm actually dealing with something in my bed right now.

If you wanted to know.

So me and Ben recently, not recently, but a few months ago, we got a new mattress, Tempurpedic, highly recommend.

And we've been loving it.

But it's a, I would say it's a bigger mattress height wise than our previous mattress.

And our Brooklinen sheets, we wake up every morning.

The sheets are curled up off the corners like in a ball at the bottom.

And we're like laying on the mattress, which honestly, the mattress is so soft and comfortable.

I don't mind, but it is a little annoying.

So a week ago, I ordered

These little gadgets.

They're like suspenders you put on the corner, whatever.

It's like this whole thing.

And it worked.

And I like returned to this peaceful place in my bed.

And this week, for the first time in a while, I had my housekeeper come.

And I don't know where she put the little suspenders.

And like I had pizza for a week, and now I can't find the suspenders.

And I woke up this morning.

Where's the sheet?

In a ball on the floor.

That is so crazy.

We both sleep very aggressively, but that's wild.

But we also have the sheet problem.

Like, I think any human would have the sheet problem, but it might not end up on the floor.

Yeah.

Do you guys use a top sheet also?

Fuck no.

What do you think?

We're sociopaths.

That might help.

Why?

Because sometimes your top sheet like takes the brunt of the kicking and the...

But don't you lay underneath the top sheet?

You do, but like it might just disorient your top sheet.

You should just try it.

No, honestly, because I'm the one making the bed and I'm not dealing with the flat sheet.

It's it's honestly a terrorist organization.

Like it's it's terrorizing.

I don't know.

I think like part of growing up is realizing the value of the flat sheet and why you even have one.

I used to, like when I was younger, like five years ago, I used to like use the top sheet as like, I will sleep on top of my top sheet and then in two weeks I will take my top sheet off and then I'll sleep on my just regular sheet that way.

I don't have to change my sheets.

It's all very smart.

Isn't that pretty smart?

Yeah.

But now I go the full Monty and you have a top sheet?

Yeah.

And I'm just like, so you sleep on the top sheet underneath the top sheet and underneath your comforter.

Yes.

On top of the stretchy sheet.

Yes.

Very interesting.

And then sometimes if you're feeling a little warm, you take off your comforter and then you're just with your top sheet.

Like very top sheets are very sexy.

Sexy.

To me, that is the only value of a top sheet.

When you get hot, to just sleep with it alone.

And that's what I do like in hotels if I get hot.

Got it.

Just something to consider.

No, I'm definitely considering it.

But it's so much added work for like laundry and but I feel as though like the two hardest parts of bed making first duvet cover.

100%.

Second, getting the corners of your corner sheets on the bed while not coming off of the other corner.

The top sheet is a walk in the park.

No, let me ask you, do you tuck your top sheet in all around?

I stuff it away so it's not hanging out at the bottom.

No, but I mean when you're sleeping, do you pull it out of the tuck or something?

No, it's out of tuck.

Yeah, Ben would kill me.

Like, I know he, he, like, relates so hard to that episode of Seinfeld where like George Costanza's in the hotel and they like tuck the sheets in too tight and he gets like stuck in the bed.

And it's true.

Like honestly, when sheets are so heavily tucked that you like get a cramp, try to kick it out.

Yeah.

Then it's like my bed has become a negative place and I can, I just can't have that.

Well, first of all, I just want to say like my top sheet is always loosey-goosey, so that's not an issue.

And it sounds like your bed is already giving you some negativity so no no no no it's not it's not even though you just said no i i have a fix i just need to find my suspenders and i don't know how to text my housekeeper and be like where are the suspenders i just can't imagine that the suspenders are easier to operate than the top sheet no you put them on once and literally i they were on for a week before i had to change my sheets I forgot they were even on and I woke up every day and my sheet was, I was still on my sheet, which was crazy.

Does anyone else have this problem?

I like Googled it.

I thought it was like a very common thing.

And I only found like some weird sleep apnea blog, which recommended these Amazon things for me.

And they worked, but it doesn't, it seems like this is either an untapped market or nobody has this problem except for me.

No, because I've never heard of it, but I don't want to, you know, say.

And I don't want to make you feel like, you know.

Like it's me.

So maybe it sounds like it's something that could be a thing, but it also sounds like the two of you, maybe you both have extreme RLS.

Maybe.

And your legs are just so restless.

It's possible.

They're taking off the sheets.

Or maybe it's Theo sabotaging you.

He would never.

He might.

All right, you guys.

That's our show.

Now that's our show.

Have an amazing weekend.

Be nice to your friends.

Sorry, I sound like Ellen.

Oh, my God.

But still, really, be nice to your friends.

Wear a face mask.

Don't drink and drive.

Register to vote.

Find, well, vote at this point.

Oh, true.

Find moments of inner peace for yourself.

Take some time for yourself.

That's the best advice you could have given our audience.

Don't forget to find inner peace.

Yeah, even if it's just a few minutes of inner peace for the whole weekend.

Right, the good.

The thing about inner peace is that it's constantly fleeting.

So when you have it, just savor it.

Savor.

Thank you guys so much for listening to The Morning Toast, the Millennium Morning Show, where we deliver the past five stories that you need to know every Monday through Friday on YouTube.

So if you're watching us on YouTube, please feel free to subscribe and give this video a thumbs up.

We're also available as a podcast anywhere podcasts can be found.

So that's Spotify, iTunes, Stitcher, Public Radio, iHeartRadio, Cast Box.

We're now available on Amazon Music.

So wherever you listen to podcasts, find us, The Morning Toast, and leave a five-star review, please, about how beautiful, stunning, and smart we are because we just read our reviews and they're really fucking mean.

You guys, they're so crazy and terrible, but you know what?

I think that's like what the reviews are for.

Like I've written them off.

I actually think that soon Apple will get rid of

reviews, like written reviews, because they have become such a talk.

Like they're a place for like trolls who live in their basements.

Yeah, no, that's where they exist.

It's like you yelp, you know, you only write a review when you have something negative to say.

I don't know how that's productive.

So we'd appreciate any positive reviews.

I really would.

Maybe talk about like how beautiful we are, stunning or smart.

Have an amazing weekend.

We will see you guys on Monday.

We got a big week next week.

Don't forget, two big announcements from Jackie and I.

And I just want you to gear up, get yourselves mentally ready.

Yeah, it's going to be a fun.

And then it's Halloween show on Friday.

So it's just going to be a super fun week to round out the month.

And we're just going to soak up each other's awesomeness.

Oh, yay.

Have a great weekend, guys.

We'll see you on Monday.

Goodbye.

Goodbye.