213: Lost the Plot?!

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Speaker 1 This episode is brought to you by Kraft Mac and Cheese. Kraft Mac and Cheese is the best thing ever.
It's even better than a juicy dating story.

Speaker 1 Kraft Mac and Cheese will fill you with joy and giddiness without any of the secondhand anxiety. Because while Kraft Mac and Cheese is definitely cheesy, it's never cringe.

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Speaker 2 Oh, but I will say, I was at the airport and I bought two waters.

Speaker 1 Did you tip?

Speaker 2 No, no, literally two waters at the desk and it was $15.

Speaker 2 And then not only did it like ask you to tip, but you couldn't even hit no tip. You had to literally physically hit other and then put zero, zero, zero in.

Speaker 1 That's how it was.

Speaker 2 And I was like, I'm like sweating because I'm like staring at this lady and I'm like, zero, zero, zero. I'm so sorry, but I'm not going to tip on my two water bottles for $15.

Speaker 1 No, I, there was another thing. Jamba juice, the minimum tip I could do was 18%.

Speaker 1 And I swear to God, they put laxatives in it because

Speaker 1 my stomach was bad.

Speaker 3 I'm still feeling the effects of that Jamba Juice. I should, that's probably what it was.

Speaker 1 I think it's a Jamba Juice.

Speaker 1 But there was one thing,

Speaker 1 there was one thing I was literally like staring at the screen, and you came in and you like, it's no tip for me. And I forget where that was because I was just like staring.

Speaker 1 I was like, there's so many percentages, so many options. And I didn't see a way out of it.
And Justin's like watching over my shoulder and he just hits the button. Oh my God.

Speaker 1 And then you like,

Speaker 1 they know you don't tip and it's so awkward. But I always have wondered if that shows up on their screen on that end.
Yeah.

Speaker 2 It's just like,

Speaker 1 this is

Speaker 1 a tip, bitch. No tip.

Speaker 1 Oh, man. I know.

Speaker 1 I think this is a great way to segue because we do recognize, you know, that sometimes. tipping is necessary.
You know, if you make your own Fro Yo and you're the one scooping, maybe you don't tip.

Speaker 1 Maybe you don't tip for a self-serve beer. But it seems like, you know, there's a lot of people out there in this big world,

Speaker 1 big world.

Speaker 1 And a lot of people seem like they've lost the plot.

Speaker 1 Or have they?

Speaker 1 And have we lost the plot?

Speaker 1 Are we disgruntled? with our lot we've been dealt not me our lot

Speaker 1 i've been using a lot of weird words today. I just finished the new Hunger Game book, and there's like a couple big words in there I didn't know.

Speaker 1 And I was like, okay, bringing out the dictionary today. Gonna use a little thesaurus.

Speaker 2 I love this. I can't wait for you to mess up phrases from the past, too.

Speaker 1 It happens. It happens.
There's a new phrase I learned, though, and I was like, oh, that's so good. I want to use it.
I already forgot it.

Speaker 1 So that's a bummer. Big bummer.
But what's new in your world, everyone? How are we doing down there on the sofa? Who do I got with me today? Lauren.

Speaker 3 JT.

Speaker 1 What? Who's that? Me.

Speaker 1 You've never introduced yourself as that.

Speaker 2 He's rebranding, okay? Yeah. Yes.
It's fresh. Don't make it weird.

Speaker 1 It's Justin and me, Morgan. Hi, guys.
Welcome back to another episode of Two Hot Takes.

Speaker 1 I got some good old wine. I got some good stories, I think.

Speaker 1 And we're going to get into some good old-fashioned chaos. Some people that lost the plot with your good old friends.
Lauren.

Speaker 1 And JT.

Speaker 3 I can't do this without headphones.

Speaker 1 This is too weird. I know.
It feels like we're actually talking to each other. I know.

Speaker 2 It really has tripped me up the past few times, but I think now I'm kind of.

Speaker 3 Well, if the mics cut out,

Speaker 3 you guys wouldn't know. And then you'd be like, oh, done with the episode, but none of it's there.

Speaker 3 So I'll be here for quality control.

Speaker 1 Thank you, Justin. I really appreciate that.

Speaker 2 It makes me feel safe. Like, I feel like I'm in a little bubble, and it's like, no one can hurt me here in my headphones.
And then when I

Speaker 2 feel like, ah, when I'm

Speaker 1 so much better.

Speaker 2 So naked.

Speaker 1 Do you want some headphones? Oh, this is so good.

Speaker 2 I do want headphones, but I'm wearing these really pretty earrings that Sarah got us at her wedding.

Speaker 1 And now I'm like, well, then I have to sacrifice the earrings.

Speaker 2 I have to take them out. And like,

Speaker 3 can't do that. Lauren's earring game is always top-notch.

Speaker 3 Always, ever since I've met her.

Speaker 1 Thank you.

Speaker 3 Always. You have like the coolest ones every time.

Speaker 2 I really don't feel that way. And I'm just shocked that you.

Speaker 3 Especially when you stack them all the way up.

Speaker 1 Nice. Our friend Kira, who made those earrings, just commented on one of the new Patreon posts.

Speaker 1 And she was like, I just want to tell you how nice I was getting a shout-out because I was dealing with like not feeling creative. And that was just so great.
So

Speaker 1 Lauren's always down for some earrings. If you want to send your earrings to the PO box, it's in the description of this episode.
Oh my gosh, I love that. Yeah,

Speaker 1 get the girl on some good earrings.

Speaker 2 Well, definitely no pressure, but I need to.

Speaker 1 No pressure. No pressure.
If you want to just send a postcard sticker. Or nothing.
Like, just love

Speaker 1 a note. Cost of a stamp.

Speaker 1 Let's get into these today. Just be nice in the comments, and I will love you forever.

Speaker 1 Let's dive in. Let's do it.

Speaker 2 Say something. Do a catchphrase.

Speaker 1 JT.

Speaker 1 JT's ready.

Speaker 1 Aruga.

Speaker 1 What does that mean?

Speaker 1 It's the submarine diving.

Speaker 1 Aruga.

Speaker 1 I know exactly what you're trying to do.

Speaker 1 It's so good. I don't know.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 Oh, no.

Speaker 1 Makeup ruined already. I'm raccooning.

Speaker 1 Gosh, darn it.

Speaker 1 Can you just do one submarine sound? No. Please, please.
Please, please.

Speaker 3 I'll do my other sound that everyone loved on Patreon.

Speaker 1 Let's hear it. What is this?

Speaker 1 What is it?

Speaker 3 I don't know. I don't remember.
What? I was hoping you'd play it.

Speaker 1 No, I don't even know where it is. Do you remember what I was talking about?

Speaker 1 No.

Speaker 3 Yeah, the sound. And you're like, don't ever make that sound again.

Speaker 3 Everyone was commenting that.

Speaker 1 Oh, I don't remember what I was saying.

Speaker 3 It was the baby or something.

Speaker 1 Oh, it was a goo-goo gaga or something.

Speaker 3 Oh, it was the sun from Teletubbies.

Speaker 1 That was the worst sound I've ever heard in my life. But if you want to do it again, you can't.
Do it again.

Speaker 1 Oh!

Speaker 1 I've never heard anything of the sort.

Speaker 3 That's exactly how it sounds. That was probably even more accurate, honestly.

Speaker 2 I pecked you as monotone.

Speaker 1 I'm shook right now.

Speaker 1 Monotone. No, no, no, not monotone.

Speaker 2 Just more even-keeled. That was wild.
I'm impressed. I'm shocked.

Speaker 1 I'm happy. I'm scared.

Speaker 2 A lot of emotions. I feel like you're upset.

Speaker 1 I'll refresh your memory, Lauren.

Speaker 2 Am I digging myself in a hole?

Speaker 2 I don't mean to upset you.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 3 Look at him coming over the hill.

Speaker 2 I think honestly, they should hire you for this role because you do it better.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 1 I got my tissues over here because I'm ending with a story today that I already know I will be losing my tear ducks over. That's why you got the tissues?

Speaker 1 Well, I was laughing really hard and I just needed to make sure I didn't

Speaker 1 get crazy, but now I'm prepared for later. But let's get into this first one, shall we? Yeah.

Speaker 1 Okay, this first one is coming from Am I the Asshole. It is four hours old, titled, Am I the Asshole for Refusing to Pay My Friend After My Ferret Attacked Her $900 Dress?

Speaker 1 Why would a ferret do such a thing?

Speaker 1 So I, 29 female, have a pet ferret, Noodles. He's super friendly and curious, and I let him free roam when I'm home.

Speaker 1 My friend Kara, 28 female, fake name, came over last weekend for wine night with a few of our other friends.

Speaker 1 She showed up wearing this very extra silk dress, said she had a date after and didn't have time to change. I told her maybe not the best outfit for a casual girls' night, but whatever.

Speaker 1 Well, at one point, she gets up to go to the kitchen, and Noodles, being the menace he is, bolts towards her and jumps up.

Speaker 1 His little claws snag the back of her dress, and it tears maybe a half-inch slit. She screams, freaks out, and runs into the bathroom sobbing.
The whole vibe died instantly.

Speaker 1 I I felt bad, but also like you wore a $900 dress to drink boxed wine on my carpet with a literal ferret present.

Speaker 1 Anyways, she sends me a Venmo request later that night for $920.

Speaker 1 Apparently, the dress is some vintage designer and the repair requires special fabric sourcing.

Speaker 2 You could buy a new one for that price?

Speaker 1 I declined the request. She sent it again.
I declined again. Oh,

Speaker 1 London's cuttiness. Now she's telling everyone I'm irresponsible and letting my rodent ruin people's things.
She even told our group chat that I let noodles drink wine.

Speaker 1 He just sniffed the glass one time. This is not real.

Speaker 1 My other friends are split. Some say I should pay at least something.

Speaker 1 Noodles was wasted.

Speaker 1 That menace.

Speaker 1 Others say Kara's being dramatic. Then today,

Speaker 1 her lawyer sent me a letter saying I'm liable for damages. Oh my God.
I literally laughed out loud.

Speaker 1 Like, what judge is going to look at me and say, quote, yes, pay $900 because your ferret got excited about silk.

Speaker 1 So am I the asshole? Or is this entire thing completely unhinged?

Speaker 2 I can't even think straight because this is just funny like i don't know if i'm in a weird mood or if this is actually as funny as i think it is

Speaker 3 hilarious but hey let's flip it around put on your mentally put on your favorite favorite item of clothing you own oh it'd be ira especially if it's something that was passed down or you found on a random trip at a thrift shop from whatever designer whatever Now, someone's pet, dog, cat is probably more likely, let's agree, everybody,

Speaker 1 to wreck your cats under the bus, okay?

Speaker 3 To wreck your stuff.

Speaker 3 What is the correct response and course of action? Whose responsibility is it really?

Speaker 2 First of all, cat, not more likely. A cat won't want anything to do with your ass.
Second of all,

Speaker 2 a dog jumps right up on you and has no understanding of boundaries.

Speaker 1 That's true.

Speaker 3 I've had cats jump at me too. Maybe I'm just traumatized from cats.

Speaker 1 Yeah, you've had bad experiences.

Speaker 3 Regardless of the the animal, everyone. Yes, yes.
What is the protocol?

Speaker 2 I mean, I do, I definitely.

Speaker 1 Because if your dog bites someone, that's your fault.

Speaker 2 Yeah, I see your point. And I think I just am curious if the ferret is usually out.
Does the ferret usually have this behavior? Did she say something like, hey, don't wear that around my ferret?

Speaker 2 Like, what were these conversations that were had? Because... I mean, you're right, Justin.

Speaker 2 If you go into somebody else's home and an animal bites you, hurts you, whatever, then it's usually the owner's responsibility.

Speaker 2 So, as silly as this sounds and as annoying as it is, because she's like, you came over for a boxed wine with a ferret, with my drunk ferret,

Speaker 2 with noodles.

Speaker 1 I named him noodle for a second.

Speaker 3 Well, I mean, she in court can say, well, he was intoxicated. He didn't know what he was doing.

Speaker 2 You took advantage of noodles, okay?

Speaker 1 I mean, I feel like this is a tough one because it's like, did the friend know the ferret existed? Probably. The OP kind of implied it.

Speaker 1 If she didn't and wore this dress for the going on a date and whatever, like, then I'd be kind of annoyed where it's like, I didn't know you had a ferret. Like, yeah, for sure.

Speaker 1 I didn't know I shouldn't wear a dress. I didn't expect a ferret to latch onto my silk.

Speaker 1 I don't think you're entitled to pay for the whole dress. You should definitely pay for the repair.

Speaker 1 Agreed. If that's sewing it up.
whatever. Like, I don't know what they do.
This sounds really bougie, but you should definitely try to make it right. But the the whole value of the dress no

Speaker 1 but i'd love for some lawyers to chime in because i i bet that that girl could actually take op to court it might be a judge duty court yeah but i think op would lose i mean you can take someone to court for anything anything right yeah anything it's does she have a case I yeah she does have a case I think well and it's like what's the value of the friendship

Speaker 3 is that not being factored in because it kind of seems like it's like

Speaker 3 she reacted because her favorite dress got wrecked. And,

Speaker 3 you know, yeah, it might have been an overstep to just request the whole amount.

Speaker 1 Yeah, that's what I'm saying.

Speaker 3 But it seems like if this is a true friendship,

Speaker 3 it'd have been like, hey,

Speaker 3 I don't really want to pay that much, but like, let's come to some kind of compromise here. Yeah.
Versus just being like, okay, see ya. And then she's going to sue.

Speaker 3 And now we're just throwing it all away.

Speaker 1 Yeah. It's interesting.
I know. I mean, the friendship it's probably not going to survive after this.

Speaker 1 I'm, I'm curious because it's so hard because if she went to that restaurant for her date and a server spilled red wine on her, the restaurant would pay for dry cleaning.

Speaker 1 If it didn't come out, I think they would replace the dress. So

Speaker 1 your friend.

Speaker 1 a restaurant or like when I was a flight attendant if you spilled on someone we'd pay for dry cleaning for their stuff and then replace it so it is tough if you have renter's insurance, you could let your renter's insurance pay for it if you want to save your friendship, but also at the same time, like you were kind of silly to wear a $900 dress over to my house knowing I have a ferret.

Speaker 1 That's kind of on you. Like you took the risk.
If a stranger on the street bumped in you and spilled on you, there's no way you'd get money from that stranger.

Speaker 1 Like that's kind of the risk you assume when you wear nice things out.

Speaker 1 But that could be my way of thinking. And that I feel like might not be logical.
A story similar to this was Was it the woman who gave birth on her friend's couch? I don't remember.

Speaker 1 Because that's what came to mind for me.

Speaker 2 I can't remember what it was, but it's just reminding me because it's like what you said. If it was a stranger, you usually don't expect

Speaker 2 that because the stranger probably walks away. But at the same time, if it was at a restaurant, then the restaurant is usually liable and will pay for it.
Or on an airline.

Speaker 2 Like I had a flight attendant spill coffee all over me on my brand new white shoes and they ended up giving me like a like a decent flight credit for that but in this situation

Speaker 2 it's like you can say that

Speaker 2 it's petty and frustrating because like for example like if somebody just immediately Venmo requested me like 900 bucks I would be like the f like that would really bother

Speaker 1 me off that's a shit ton of money yeah and not even having like a discussion

Speaker 2 and being like hey we need to talk about this this was really expensive like I need you to like help me out here because

Speaker 2 XYZ yeah So that would bother me. And then going and telling the group chat that my ferret was drunk and that's why he jumped on me.

Speaker 2 Then that would piss me off too.

Speaker 1 Smith it. Yeah.
Question mark, question mark, question mark. Yeah.
So we do have some comments from OP. Okay.
Top comment. Info.

Speaker 1 Did she know that Noodles was a free-roaming ferret before she came over? I.e., has she been over before and seen him free-roaming? Yes. We've been friends for a decade now.

Speaker 1 Oh, she's met Noodles several times and knows the vibe. It wasn't a surprise that Noodles was free roaming.

Speaker 3 But he just doesn't usually attack.

Speaker 1 Same person responds and goes, then definitely not the asshole. She knew he'd be roaming free.
She took the chance. It's all on her.

Speaker 1 Someone replies back, dogs are free roaming too. If the dog attacked the friend, would you say the friend is the asshole?

Speaker 1 If a dog jumped up on her wearing the dress and snagged it, I'd say the same thing. She made a poor choice.

Speaker 1 So people are kind of going back and forth in the comments a little bit. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Huh.

Speaker 3 So it's really comes down to. I honestly want to know what would happen in court.

Speaker 1 I know.

Speaker 3 Because where does that actual line fall? Yeah.

Speaker 1 Oh, sorry. Well, there's just this other comment to kind of demonstrate how back and forth people are going.
You're the asshole. You invited company to your house.

Speaker 1 All you had to do was put your pet up. If I was your friend, I wouldn't think it would be an issue meeting up at your apartment before a date in a nice dress.

Speaker 1 You shouldn't be so callous of the fact that your pet jumped on your uninvited guest and ruined her dress.

Speaker 2 So this kind of reminds me, I saw this video where this girl was texting on her phone as she was going across the crosswalk.

Speaker 2 And this guy was taking a right turn and didn't notice her and like bumped her.

Speaker 2 It was okay. It was okay.
Everything was okay. But it was a video caught of this situation.
Yeah. And everybody in the comments were going at it as well.
They were all debating each other.

Speaker 2 Who is wrong? Yeah. Who is wrong? And the girl on like texting the cell phone, they're like, you shouldn't be on the cell phone when it doesn't matter.

Speaker 1 She's on the crosswalk.

Speaker 2 Yeah. And then somebody was like, no, it's on, it's the vehicle.
Everybody was fighting on it.

Speaker 2 And I'm like, the reality is it's like, well, she shouldn't have been texting when she's crossing the street. Like, that's.
true. She should be looking out for herself.

Speaker 2 And the best thing to do for herself is not be texting and looking around for her own safety. Yeah.

Speaker 2 But if you took it to court, like she's in the clear, and the car is the one who's to blame.

Speaker 1 I love the lawyer who does those videos on TikTok. It's like this car rearrends this one or does that.
And then he's like, which one's at fault here? Red car or white car?

Speaker 1 And then after they'll like reveal the answer,

Speaker 1 it is really interesting.

Speaker 3 Gotta study up.

Speaker 1 Gotta study.

Speaker 2 Yeah. So in this case, I think it's like the friend wearing the silk dress seems like kind of annoying and frustrating.

Speaker 2 But at the same time, if they took it to court, she'd probably legally win the case. I'm not sure, but that's what I'm guessing.

Speaker 2 Because, like you guys said, if it was a dog who jumped and bit somebody, they would be liable, right?

Speaker 1 So, I think, I think, OP, technically, if this got brought to court, I mean, this girl's involving her lawyer. She means business.
And maybe this like isn't the first time Noodles has like

Speaker 1 been a menace every time OP's words. The name Noodles comes out.

Speaker 1 Noodles might have a history. Noodles might have a rap sheet.
I don't know.

Speaker 2 Be inspired to buy a ferret named Noodles.

Speaker 1 Because honestly,

Speaker 1 if this girl's involving her lawyer, though, like that's a drastic jump. OP does have quite a few comments here.
I mean, it's only a couple hours old, but OP goes, that's what I was thinking too.

Speaker 1 Like $20 or $40 stitch-up would have been reasonable, but I don't know. I'm not a seamstress, so I'm not sure.
Surely not a paycheck's worth of repairs. Downvoted 220 times.

Speaker 1 People are kind of like, why wouldn't she change at your house? Why wouldn't she bring that dress and then change? I was trying to imply the same thing to her.

Speaker 1 It wouldn't be weird for her to change at my place before the date. We are friends from college, so it isn't unusual for us to get ready or change in front of each other.

Speaker 1 The weird behavior was just the sudden passive-aggressive Venmo for what totals to half a paycheck for me. We've been friends for a decade, and she can't have a conversation about it with me.

Speaker 1 I think she's taking advantage of daddy here too. Like something else has to be going on in her life for this to really escalate to this.

Speaker 1 Negative 57 votes.

Speaker 2 That was OP that said that, right?

Speaker 1 Mm-hmm. Yeah, Kara, the girl, has pets it and watched noodles before.

Speaker 1 If the group coming over wasn't already familiar with my ferret, then I would agree, but this wasn't his first time with the group.

Speaker 1 Kind of implying, like, I would have put him away, but that isn't an issue because everyone's comfortable with my pet noodles.

Speaker 2 Yeah, but I would say that when you saw she's wearing the dress, that's super nice. Then it probably would have been a good idea to put noodles away.

Speaker 1 I mean, I would, I wouldn't say, like, Lauren, come on over, and you're wearing like a really nice, fancy dress. And I wouldn't say, Hey, get on my horse.

Speaker 1 No, you're gonna get horse hair and dirt all over you, and you might smell like shit.

Speaker 1 My horses don't smell like shit, but you get the point.

Speaker 1 But, anyways, final vote on this one: where do you guys land?

Speaker 1 Gotta go to court.

Speaker 3 I'm ready.

Speaker 1 I'll be there.

Speaker 1 Not the asshole. Give me the date.

Speaker 3 Time. Location.

Speaker 1 You're ready. Yeah.

Speaker 2 I have a hard time giving like a hard stamp on this one.

Speaker 1 That was my cop-out. Okay.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 1 We're going to kick it off with a vote to the people. There's no vote right now on Am I the Asshole? It is too new.
Hmm. Wow.

Speaker 1 I'm kind of in the boat of everyone's sucks here, I think.

Speaker 1 Did she have to wear the dress?

Speaker 1 Maybe, maybe not. You kind of knew you were going to hang out with Noodles.
Could the friend have put Noodles away? Yeah. Could they have had a conversation before the passive-aggressive Venmo fight?

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 2 That's the part that bothers me.

Speaker 1 Like, why did you have to have a chat? Have a chat, guys.

Speaker 3 Well, it's interesting that neither of them anticipated this. Is this a first? Is it just happened to be that material? It's like the first time something like this has occurred?

Speaker 1 Based on OP's comments, this is a first.

Speaker 3 Either the friend going over could have had the, you know, the idea to say, hey, can we put him away?

Speaker 3 Because I'm just, you know, I don't want to mess around with this dress because he tends to go towards things.

Speaker 1 Or

Speaker 3 the owner could have been like, hey, I'll just put him away just because, you know, just in case.

Speaker 1 Sorry.

Speaker 3 So neither of them anticipated. It's like it happened all of a sudden.

Speaker 1 So it's no assholes here.

Speaker 3 Oh, I don't know. I'm just adding more fuel to the fire.

Speaker 1 Well, let's see what you both think about this next one because it's also a little juicy. Okay.
Okay. Okay.
okay okay

Speaker 1 this one is coming from r slash am i overreacting seven hours old it is titled am i overreacting for kicking my sister out after what she did at my wedding

Speaker 1 i 28 female got married last weekend to the love of my life it was a smallish wedding around 80 people very personal lots of emotions and we paid for everything ourselves I had asked my younger sister, 24 female, to be my maid of honor.

Speaker 1 We've always been close and I've helped her through a lot, bad breakups, school stress, financial stuff, so I thought this would be a beautiful experience for both of us.

Speaker 1 The day of the wedding, everything was going smoothly until the reception. During the speeches, my sister went up and started her toast by saying how happy she was for us.

Speaker 1 But then, without warning, she started crying. Hard.

Speaker 1 At first, I thought it was just emotion, but then she started talking about how hard it was to, quote, watch someone you love get married when your own heart is shattered.

Speaker 1 No.

Speaker 1 She revealed on the mic, in front of everyone, that her ex-boyfriend, who she was still heartbroken over, had proposed to someone else a week ago, and it had wrecked her.

Speaker 1 She went on for about three minutes. My husband looked mortified.
My mom tried to pull her off the microphone. And people were dead silent.
Then she dropped the mic and left the reception in tears.

Speaker 1 I didn't chase after her. I was honestly stunned.
I made it through the rest of the night, but didn't enjoy it the same way I had imagined. Two days later, she showed up at our apartment.

Speaker 1 She was staying with us temporarily while figuring out her housing. I told her I needed space and she needed to leave.

Speaker 1 She started sobbing again and said I was punishing her for having emotions and that she didn't mean to ruin anything. She just broke down and didn't know what to do.

Speaker 1 My mom and a few mutual friends are saying that I'm being too harsh, that she clearly wasn't trying to be malicious and is obviously going through something.

Speaker 1 But I feel like she stole one of the most important moments of my life. And I honestly don't even know if I want her at any future milestones.
Am I overreacting?

Speaker 2 Go for it, Justin.

Speaker 3 I don't think you are in the sense that I think when people

Speaker 3 have the ability to walk away or need voice that they need some space in, like, even just a regular argument, if you're just like, hey, this isn't productive, I think we just take some space and preserve.

Speaker 3 the future relationship instead of saying things or hearing things that can never be taken back or things being taken too far.

Speaker 3 In that sense, it doesn't feel so much to me like you're putting out your sister who's struggling so hard right now and just needs someone.

Speaker 3 You're more for your own and her own good, as well as your mutual relationship, doing it with good reason because you're coming off of this so fresh and you're still very affected by it, frustrated.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 3 And yeah, you say now that you want nothing to do with her at future events and all this, future milestones, but

Speaker 3 I think that's just how you feel right now. But because you're mentioning things like that, it's probably best for her to not be right in your space day after day,

Speaker 3 just so you can get some space from what happened.

Speaker 3 Come back down.

Speaker 3 Yeah, it sucks. Like that's the big moment everyone like remembers from the wedding.

Speaker 3 But that'll pass. It all, all the dust will settle.
So I don't think it's that bad. Might be really hard for her.
In some ways, she made her own bed.

Speaker 1 She did.

Speaker 3 It might be hard on her, but for right now, I think it's just it's good for you and it's good for the both of you in the long run.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I don't think she's overreacting. I think it would be pretty hard to come back from that.
You don't realize how long three minutes is,

Speaker 1 and you find out quickly when it's a really bad speech you have to listen to. And someone sobbing on a microphone, we're all going to have that happen at the end of this episode.

Speaker 1 It will be me, but during a happy moment, a wedding speech, I don't think so. Like, I'm like looking at costs for our wedding.
I'm heavily in planning. And weddings are expensive.

Speaker 1 I looked at a catering menu today. This place estimates anywhere from $18 to $26 a person.
Do that math, Lauren. $26 times $80.

Speaker 1 That's how much they paid for their guests to eat. And that's not rental for chairs and table and a venue and flowers and a dress.

Speaker 2 I'm very aware that weddings are extremely overpriced. Thank you.

Speaker 1 They're terrible. They're terrible.
But it's like, I understand. Like, you, you're paying for this yourselves.
You want to have this amazing time. You have this great, intimate day.

Speaker 1 And then she does this.

Speaker 1 Yes, you're going through a tough time, but there's a time and a place. I've done nothing but support you.
And on my big day where I need your support, you do this to me.

Speaker 1 I'm giving you a place to stay. I'm really supporting you right now.
And I don't care if she's had too much to drink. The mom tried to step up and get her off the mic.

Speaker 1 And then she just drops it and walks out in tears. Like,

Speaker 1 what show are you trying to make? Get it together.

Speaker 2 And I think if I was in this situation, I would be. very upset because it puts such a damper on the mood for everybody.
And like you said, you invest so much into it.

Speaker 2 And it's a day that she really had in her head that she wanted to be very special.

Speaker 2 The only thing though, and she has every right to ask for space and she's putting her up. But the only thing I will say is that I do see and get that it wasn't malicious.
And so in that,

Speaker 2 I hear that on the sister side, clearly the sister's going through some like shit, maybe even mental health stuff, like to feel. comfortable enough to do that up in a wedding.

Speaker 2 Like maybe there's something else going on. That's true.

Speaker 2 But at the same time,

Speaker 1 what thanks for being the devil's advocate. I was being maybe a little too harsh.

Speaker 2 Well, no, but I mean, at the same time, this is the part that actually turns me back on to being again frustrated with the sister is that she's like, Oh, you're gonna punish me for having emotions.

Speaker 2 No, that's not what's going on here. She's upset because you took away

Speaker 2 a lot from a really beautiful moment from her. And the fact that you're not coming to her saying,

Speaker 1 I am so sorry, like, I am am going through a lot and that was the wrong time to do it and i i can't even express how sorry i am for deciding to do that then and there then we would have a different story to talk about but the fact that she's kind of like well what are you going to punish me for being sad like i don't even think like and i think kind of back to your point justin i don't think asking for space is punishment if you're clearly communicating and you're not ghosting someone and you're not being passive aggressive in their presence and you're just just saying, hey, I'm really hurt by what you did.

Speaker 1 I just need some space right now to like get over this and like, I don't know, work through my feelings because I don't want to resent you. I love you.

Speaker 1 You're my sister, but like, I need some time right now. Yeah.
And obviously, yeah, she, she is hurting. She's clearly going through it, but I don't think it's unfair to ask for space.

Speaker 2 Absolutely not.

Speaker 1 That seems really reasonable.

Speaker 2 The only thing I wonder, because she's like, I don't know if I want her at future milestone moments. Like that sounds harsh to me, unless this is a pattern that she's done throughout her entire life.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 2 If it's something where every single time she has a milestone, her sister does something to make it about her and put all the attention on her, different story.

Speaker 2 But if that's the only time it happened, then I would say that that feels a little harsh to never want her. Like what you, you don't want her at like your baby shower?

Speaker 1 Do you not want her like at you know, at

Speaker 2 your future child's graduation? Like, what are, what are you saying here?

Speaker 1 She's just out.

Speaker 3 Well, I feel like it's such an intense emotion that she doesn't know how to handle it. And it's blinding, like it's taking over her mind so much that she's not making good choices.

Speaker 3 Obviously, it affected her so much that she didn't realize in the moment that that wasn't the time or place. Yeah.

Speaker 3 And then the fact that she's now coming back and essentially doubling down by saying, Are you punishing me, punishing me for being upset?

Speaker 1 Maybe a little emotional.

Speaker 3 I think she's just completely taken over by it where she's not even being rational.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Yeah.

Speaker 2 That's what I think too. Because the double, the double down is what bothers me.

Speaker 2 But I, even though I obviously the first part bothers me too but at the same time I think like depending on where she was at

Speaker 2 I think a lot of us can relate to being absolutely crushed by a romantic relationship and not even thinking clearly or straight and maybe that was her moment which obviously sucks that she did that terrible but like maybe she was it was so out of character for her that she can come back from that and you would hope that she can And, but again, OP still has every right to ask for space because that was a really big moment for her.

Speaker 2 And it would be hard to like keep smiling after that and have a good time because now you're just thinking about that.

Speaker 1 How do you like, how do you just let that go? You know, okay, everyone,

Speaker 1 let's go dance now, I guess.

Speaker 2 Let's pretend that never happened, everyone.

Speaker 1 Everyone, let's rip a shot. Yeah, like, okay, sorry, my sister sucks.

Speaker 1 But it is tough. And speeches happen somewhat early in the night, typically.
So

Speaker 2 you know, I think there's a lot of stories of some speeches gone wrong.

Speaker 1 So, they're so funny.

Speaker 2 I would love for people to DM me and share some speeches gone wrong stories.

Speaker 1 DM you. I want to see them too.
Put them in the comments.

Speaker 2 Okay, yeah, comments.

Speaker 1 Okay. I want to hear about the worst speech you ever heard

Speaker 1 because this will help inspire Lauren to give a really good speech on our wedding.

Speaker 2 I don't, I'm too nervous.

Speaker 1 You're giving a speech.

Speaker 2 Okay, no one recorded then.

Speaker 1 That's not possible.

Speaker 1 It's fine.

Speaker 3 That's just like the live show.

Speaker 1 Is anyone recording? I know. Before we spill tea.

Speaker 1 So we do have quite the assortment of comments. I have comments right now just sorted default.
This comment has been deleted. OP responds.
Yeah, but she lived with me.

Speaker 1 She's seen how much time and effort I've put into my dream wedding. She knew this day mattered, but still chose to make it about her.
Also, she's not homeless. She went back to our mother's house.

Speaker 1 Another next comment comment down, deleted by user.

Speaker 1 And someone responds, she didn't mean to, question mark. What? She tripped and fell into a self-centered rant?

Speaker 1 As mentioned above, she could have cut her speech short when she started to feel overly emotional. She chose not to.
Besides, she's not homeless. OP deserves a break.

Speaker 1 Little sister needs some counseling. OP is not overreacting.

Speaker 1 So OP responds to whatever that person said that deleted it.

Speaker 1 I asked her to leave because she walked into the house like nothing happened and I need to talk this through in order to move past, but she just wanted to blame me for not allowing her to have emotions.

Speaker 1 Yeah, not cool. I would never leave her homeless.
She's living with my mom now. Yeah.

Speaker 1 So she was going to walk in and pretend like another, nothing ever happened. Yeah, that's not cool.
That's what I'm saying. Like the follow-on is the part that pisses me off.

Speaker 1 Someone else goes overreacting. She's obviously heartbroken and not mature enough to keep it together.

Speaker 1 I was at a wedding 20 years ago after breaking up with my forever love, and it was incredibly hard. If she didn't care about you and what the wedding meant, she wouldn't have been so upset.

Speaker 1 It's a lot for a young person to deal with the first time. Get over yourself.

Speaker 1 Wow. Okay.
Okay.

Speaker 2 We didn't go down that lane, but okay.

Speaker 1 Someone quotes what that person said. If she didn't care about you and what the wedding meant, she wouldn't have been so upset.
She wasn't upset for OP.

Speaker 1 She wasn't upset that she hurt OP or ruined a special memory. She was upset because an old boyfriend is moving on with his life, something she hasn't managed to do.

Speaker 1 I kind of like it. Her actions were extremely immature.
If she didn't think she could hold it together, she should have said something to OP or her mother and they could have just skipped the speech.

Speaker 1 Instead, she ruined something very special, not the whole wedding, but definitely that moment.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 OP comments back to whatever the person said. That was crazy about the overreacting, whatever.
Yeah, and I've been there for her this whole time.

Speaker 1 I understand that she's going through a lot and I'm always there for her, but she wasn't there for me on my big day. Yeah.

Speaker 2 Question, just asking for a friend. If I were to somehow be very emotional on the day of your wedding, would I also be able to talk

Speaker 1 to you about it beforehand?

Speaker 1 I'll be mentally prepared that if you cry and have a breakdown, that's okay.

Speaker 3 And then we'll just take the mic off.

Speaker 1 You're a beautiful speaker. You have such a way with words and you love us and you're such a big part of the reason we're together.
You're going to give a beautiful speech.

Speaker 2 Oh, thank you.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 What now?

Speaker 3 Oh, nothing.

Speaker 1 What were you going to say?

Speaker 3 I was going to say, if Lauren did that like this,

Speaker 3 then we would just take the mic after and be like, all right, everyone, let's have a party tonight. And everyone give Lauren an extra hug.

Speaker 1 We would do that.

Speaker 3 And maybe an extra shot.

Speaker 1 Oh, an extra shot.

Speaker 2 And then I'd grab the mic.

Speaker 1 No, my grandma's going to have to go. Lauren, no more speeches.

Speaker 1 There are a couple other comments from OP just clarifying that she doesn't have a history with substance abuse.

Speaker 1 Also saying, I just don't get why I'm the bad guy for wanting space after she made such a scene at my wedding.

Speaker 2 Yeah, a lot of people are really against OP, it sounds like.

Speaker 1 I know. I understand she's going through a lot and I've been there for her this whole breakup.
Is one day too much to ask for?

Speaker 1 I know it wasn't her intention, but we tried to get her off the mic, which is why I'm so upset and wanted space. So I asked her to leave.
She's at my mom's house. She's not alone.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 I think this is so fair.

Speaker 1 This is so fair.

Speaker 2 The only part, like I said, that I don't really understand is the fact that she said, I don't know if I want her at future milestones. Like that part seems harsh to me.

Speaker 1 I think with time, this is so fresh. I mean, it sounds like this happened literally like today is Tuesday and it happened this weekend.
Mmm.

Speaker 2 So like the same time at the wedding that we were at a wedding,

Speaker 1 OP was at a wedding.

Speaker 3 In that exact moment that Kelsey was giving a speech for Sarah this was happening yeah I mean there's not much many more events she'll give a speech at also I know like in reality yeah it's not like I don't think you give speeches at a baby shower do you I mean if it's an impromptu toast yeah like the tap the glass kind of thing

Speaker 1 no one really did that at Sarah's wedding sometimes people get a little teared away with the the glass tapping to kiss. Yeah.
That didn't happen much at hers.

Speaker 1 No. It was kind of nice.

Speaker 3 No romantics there.

Speaker 1 They did a little bit. No romantics there.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 1 Moving along to the next one, but I would love to get an update from OP.

Speaker 1 I'm curious how this plays out and if your sister does decompress and give you a good apology. But we're moving on to this next one.

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Speaker 1 Okay, everyone, buckle up because this next one is

Speaker 1 weird.

Speaker 1 Yeah, put your seatbelt on, a little father nose, something style. You want to buckle up down there?

Speaker 2 I've never done this. It's just.

Speaker 3 Yep. I've seen Lauren and Uber.
She doesn't really buckle much.

Speaker 2 That's so false. I buckle every time.

Speaker 2 The only reason I wouldn't have buckled is if I'm like jam-packed in there and it's like a five-deep.

Speaker 3 Like four deep in the back seat.

Speaker 2 Yeah, exactly. Or if like I can't find the things, but no, I'm a big buckler.

Speaker 3 I guess when you're packed in that tight, it's like you're, that is your seatbelt. That's not true.

Speaker 1 Unless the middle person goes, well, your body's going to bounce around and kill everyone.

Speaker 2 Oh, God, don't say that. I was just laughing.
You didn't need to go that dark.

Speaker 1 I'm a pessimist.

Speaker 1 Okay, this next one. I'm definitely being a pessimist over.

Speaker 1 This is coming from True Off My Chest,

Speaker 2 and it is weird.

Speaker 1 Seven days old. And here's the title.
My boyfriend took me to visit his family for the first time, and it was one of the creepiest experiences ever.

Speaker 1 My boyfriend and I have been dating for about half a year now, and it's been great so far. Never met his family up until this point, as they live in another state.

Speaker 1 This past weekend, he decides to take me on a quick trip Friday to Sunday to meet his family. I knew he's from a wealthy Scientologist family, but he himself is not practicing or involved.

Speaker 1 He said it's not actually that big of a deal. His family's nice.
It's a very big deal. We get to the house, huge mansion, super well guarded, top security.
It already feels off at this point to me.

Speaker 1 Inside the property, there are people in uniforms working around the yard and garden.

Speaker 3 Let's get out.

Speaker 1 They greet us, but make no eye contact whatsoever.

Speaker 1 I'm creeped out at this point. I ask my boyfriend about them.
He says they're just staff. I meet his mom, dad, and younger brother inside.
They're nice. His parents are very fancy people.

Speaker 1 Inside the house, there's the same people in uniforms doing stuff, and the place is spotlessly clean. We have a meal together, and these people serve us.
Think servants in movies?

Speaker 1 They don't talk, no eye contact. The parents don't interact with them.
It's so weird.

Speaker 2 How rich are these people? I feel like it's like the celebrities, not going to name names, but

Speaker 1 at this point, I subtly mention them by saying the staff's doing a great job. The mom says they're not really staff, but something similar.

Speaker 1 She says they're part of something called the Sea Org, and they're essentially volunteers, so they don't get paid.

Speaker 1 Oh, God.

Speaker 1 Rest of the days until we leave were exactly the same. I tried to have a chat with the volunteers, but they only give short, polite replies and then run off.

Speaker 1 It quite literally felt like they were forced to be there.

Speaker 1 I tried to ask my boyfriend about it, even now, but he has the same way of talking in circles as his parents about anything related to their family/slash Scientology.

Speaker 1 They say a lot, but actually say nothing.

Speaker 1 The end.

Speaker 3 What do you mean?

Speaker 1 That's it.

Speaker 1 That's not the end.

Speaker 1 That is quite literally it.

Speaker 2 This is really hurtful, Morgan. I can't believe you do this stuff.

Speaker 3 That's like literally saying, Hey, I got the story to tell you. With this one time, I went to.

Speaker 1 I mean, I feel like we got a lot. It's get out.

Speaker 3 When does the tea come out? When's she doing the spoon around the tea? And then you fall into your mind, and all of a sudden, your brain's getting. Oh, God.

Speaker 2 I have not watched that movie since it was out in the theater.

Speaker 1 The running. So scary.
Do you know how a movie was also terrifying? And I feel like get out got inspiration from.

Speaker 1 Did you ever see The Skeleton Key with Kate Hudson?

Speaker 2 No.

Speaker 1 Insane movie.

Speaker 1 Insane. So good.
And basically, get out.

Speaker 2 Oh my God.

Speaker 1 Oh, speaking of scary movies, everyone watched Drop.

Speaker 2 It just came out.

Speaker 2 I have two friends that wrote the movie, which is really cool.

Speaker 1 I wouldn't really call them friends.

Speaker 2 They're like acquaintances that I've met a long time ago, but I'm still really excited for them.

Speaker 1 That's really cool.

Speaker 3 Yeah. Let's go to the, oh, this already premiered.
Shoot. Dang, Lauren.
We could have been at the premiere.

Speaker 1 Did you look up Sea Org? That acquaintance. Yeah, okay.
Let's look up Scientology Sea Org.

Speaker 1 The Sea Org is the elite paramilitary branch within the Church of Scientology, consisting of its most dedicated members.

Speaker 1 It's described as the innermost core and is not incorporated, but rather a management structure controlling other Scientology organizations. The Sea Org was initially founded by L.

Speaker 1 Ron Hubbard as his private Navy with members adopting naval uniforms and ranks.

Speaker 2 So I actually didn't know that much about Scientology besides people just saying that it was weird. And

Speaker 1 true, yeah.

Speaker 2 And I had a class. It was one of my mass communication classes.
That was my minor in college. And

Speaker 2 we had an assignment to go and spend an entire day with a certain religion that was outside of our own and

Speaker 2 i can't even remember who what religion i picked but there was a girl who picked scientology and she came back like it looked like she saw a ghost she was so disturbed and she the way that she spoke about it she was like i felt like i couldn't leave like i was scared to leave every time i tried to leave they would force me to go to a new place they would tell me like they would make me do these tests oh my god and say that i had aliens that were attached to me and that i would have to pay x amount of money in order to get these aliens like detached from me and she's like i had so much homework to do that night that i was like getting anxious about leaving to do my homework and she's like and they just kept having a reason to push me to another place to not leave and she's like i it was so the way she described it and the way that her face was like

Speaker 2 the color drained out of it.

Speaker 1 It was like PTSD for her retelling this story.

Speaker 2 Yeah, because we had a present on it.

Speaker 1 And she was like, I don't even want to talk about it. Oh my God.

Speaker 1 Why would the teacher let her? Like, that's kind of a safety hazard.

Speaker 2 We didn't ask, you don't ask the teacher which religion you do before you do it. Like, you just go and pick a religion that's outside of your own and, and just like, and learn about it.

Speaker 2 Like, go and tell them

Speaker 2 kind of weird because like they, you kind of just go and tell them that you're kind of interested in what they're what they do, but it makes them think that you're interested in joining their religion.

Speaker 2 So they, you know, like that's exactly what a cult wants to hear.

Speaker 1 Holy shit. But anyway, I'm like scared reading this this story.
I'm like, are they going to come for us?

Speaker 1 Do we have to cut this one?

Speaker 2 No, I think they stay to themselves, I think.

Speaker 1 So

Speaker 2 I'm open to other

Speaker 2 religions, you know? Like, I don't, I don't like judge people, but Scientology is something that I just like won't get behind. No offense to you, Scientologists out there.

Speaker 1 Don't come for us.

Speaker 1 So what's

Speaker 3 it's giving forced labor.

Speaker 3 Yeah. But at the same time, they're under some spell that they think they're there doing this to then

Speaker 3 get something. So they're there

Speaker 3 willingly, doing the work willingly,

Speaker 3 but like.

Speaker 1 But like brainwashly.

Speaker 3 But it's just like a disguised form of like slavery almost.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I think that's because

Speaker 3 really do they ever end up with that gain that they're hoping for?

Speaker 3 And then when they get it, I don't know. Your boy's doing some research tonight.

Speaker 2 It's really odd, Justin. Like, you should research it because this guy, Ron, whatever, L.
Hubbard, I forget his name.

Speaker 1 He was like a novelist.

Speaker 2 He literally would write fiction books. Like, that was his thing.

Speaker 1 And then he created space and aliens.

Speaker 2 Yeah. And then he created this religion and said it was truth.
And people just said, okay.

Speaker 2 I don't know how that even works.

Speaker 2 I would love if I was that convincing. Holy shit.

Speaker 3 I mean, the space and aliens thing does intrigue me, not gonna lie. But at the same time,

Speaker 3 I know. I'm kidding.

Speaker 3 I like, you know,

Speaker 1 I'm losing you, Justin.

Speaker 1 I started space joke.

Speaker 3 I start floating off.

Speaker 3 Yeah, I

Speaker 3 just, without knowing, because it doesn't seem like she very, knows very much about any of it, just like us.

Speaker 3 And so, yeah, it would be just very uncomfortable. And I probably wouldn't go back.
And I'd probably be re-evaluating when I'm trying to ask

Speaker 3 my partner stuff and they're giving me this runaround. We all know what that's like.

Speaker 1 We've all been deflected.

Speaker 1 I think he's lying to OP. Well, they're all lying.

Speaker 3 The whole family's lying. We don't know what's happening.
But it's just weird. I don't know.
I just want to, I want to go into the basement. What's in the basement?

Speaker 1 Definitely. Like, where's the tea?

Speaker 3 Where's the surgery? Where's the operating room?

Speaker 1 Whoa.

Speaker 2 I might need to watch that movie again.

Speaker 3 Tonight.

Speaker 1 Watch it by yourself. No.
When Brian's out of town.

Speaker 2 No, with you guys tonight. Let's do it.
Let's go.

Speaker 1 Top comment on this one. I live near Clearwater, where one of the Scientology capitals is.
Those aren't people to mingle with.

Speaker 1 I'm sure you love your boyfriend, but his lack of participation is most definitely not known to his parents. They would have exiled him.
Oh, wow. That situation is a ticking time bomb.

Speaker 1 Next comment down. Or he's lying to OP about how involved he is.

Speaker 2 That's what I think is happening.

Speaker 1 Yeah, because he's trying to recruit her. Oh,

Speaker 1 it's not a big deal, babe. Come on.

Speaker 3 Was get out based on Scientology and then switched into the brain thing.

Speaker 3 The like getting a younger body thing?

Speaker 2 I love your typing as you look away.

Speaker 1 Let's figure that out.

Speaker 3 Or it's just based on cult vibes.

Speaker 1 I'm not seeing anything about get out being based on Scientology.

Speaker 1 However, I do find it ironic. You know, the show, The Handmaiden's Tale?

Speaker 1 You know, that the main actress is in Scientology? For real? How ironic is that? That's crazy. You don't think she would have picked up a thing or two trying to fit into that role? Whoa,

Speaker 1 goofy.

Speaker 1 Is that's, I'm shook.

Speaker 2 Was this before or after?

Speaker 1 Did she get it? Like, I don't know.

Speaker 2 I need to know more. This is something I'm going to look up after.

Speaker 1 I don't know.

Speaker 1 One, so I looked up was get out based on skeleton key.

Speaker 1 One could even say that Peel's film plays like a mere reflection of the skeleton key.

Speaker 2 Is there a chance that Scientology is not as wild as I believe it to be? Like, is there different versions of it?

Speaker 2 Like, maybe the, maybe we're only referring to the Orthodox versus

Speaker 1 conservative

Speaker 1 versus Hasidic. Yeah.

Speaker 1 I don't know if there's any Scientologists in our community, please let Lauren know, but I'm going to move along now because I'm scared. Just let her know, though.

Speaker 1 That one could be a DM. Only me.

Speaker 1 That one can go to Lauren's DM. I'm good on that one.

Speaker 1 Oh, man. Okay, moving along to this next one.
This episode of Two Hot Takes is presented by DiSerono. This holiday season, I'll be raising a glass with DiSerono.

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Speaker 1 Back to a wedding drama one because it's that time of year again and weddings are coming up and on the forefront of my brain.

Speaker 1 So this is coming from AITAH. It is titled, Am I the Asshole for Flipping Out on My Brother for Accusing My Mom of Wearing a White Dress to His Wedding?

Speaker 3 Classic.

Speaker 1 So here's the deal. A classic.

Speaker 1 So here's the deal. I'm the younger sister in a very complicated family, and things have been tense since my brother George got married to Jennefer.

Speaker 1 To give some background, my relationship with Jennefer has been rocky from the start, and she's not exactly warm to my mom or any other relatives.

Speaker 2 How do you spell Jennifer?

Speaker 1 With a Y.

Speaker 2 I've never heard that before.

Speaker 1 Have you not seen The Witcher?

Speaker 1 Hmm.

Speaker 1 Anyways, the issue.

Speaker 1 Anyways, the issue came up during their civil ceremony where my mom wore this beautiful cocktail dress that has a white base, but the overlay is this bold, dark blue lace with ruffled sleeves.

Speaker 1 Well, Jennifer lost it. She completely flipped out and wanted to kick my mom out of the wedding, but somehow refrained from doing so.

Speaker 1 Since then, though, every time there's a family conflict, Jennifer and George always bring up the fact that my mom wore white at their wedding. Yes, she wore white, but it's literally not white.

Speaker 1 It's a white base with blue lace. I can't even.

Speaker 1 Now, almost a year later, my mom tries to talk things through with the family and rebuild the relationship. And George hits her with a list of grievances, including,

Speaker 1 you haven't apologized to Jennefer for wearing white. I'm honestly about to lose it.
Like, we're still going back and forth to this ridiculous dress issue.

Speaker 1 My mom is genuinely confused why this is even a problem, and I'm just trying to defend her. I feel like it's completely unfair to keep bringing up something this petty.

Speaker 1 And at this point, I can't help but feel like it's just another excuse to attack her. Am I the asshole for wanting to stand up for my mom over this dumb dress situation?

Speaker 1 I just don't get why it's such a big deal.

Speaker 3 Noah Lauren.

Speaker 1 What? Your turn.

Speaker 2 No, I pointed at you, so nose goes. It's your turn.

Speaker 1 Would we like to see the dress

Speaker 1 prior to any taste? Yes.

Speaker 2 You know, no, this is what I think. You know, this has been a topic for so long now, right? I think you should show the dress if you are like close to the bride.

Speaker 2 Show the dress that you're going to wear.

Speaker 2 Get approval. Let's just stop making this so complicated, everyone.

Speaker 3 Okay, I'll say something without seeing it. Any white is too white, okay? Why even go there? It's one day you can find something that looks just as good.
Why does it have to even be borderline?

Speaker 3 Why are we, what's the point?

Speaker 1 So I've seen the dress.

Speaker 1 And I can't, I just, I can't say anything at this point.

Speaker 2 Oh my God. Well, let's see it.
Show it.

Speaker 1 This is the dress.

Speaker 2 Oh, that's blue. That's blue as fuck.

Speaker 1 It's blue.

Speaker 1 Sure. It's so funny.

Speaker 2 I fucking apology for that.

Speaker 1 It's blue. I agree.
It's actually blue. It's like light blue and dark blue.
It's literally blue, blue, blue, blue, blue, blue, blue. I agree.

Speaker 3 We can get into the story now, but I would just say, why even be borderline?

Speaker 1 Why even put, like, cause any potential? No, you guys, I honestly, like, so I went to a store here in LA. I went to House of CB to go get some, like, dresses for Sarah's wedding.
And

Speaker 1 me and a bunch of other girls were like panic buying for events that weekend. And I walked in and out in a dress and I'm like, I'm asking the girl, I'm like, I'm like, is this too white?

Speaker 1 Like, it's, it's not a white base, but like when you kind of look at it, it's like, it's gray, taupey colored with flowers. And I'm like, it just feels too light and bridal.

Speaker 1 It feels like something that like a non-traditional bride could maybe wear.

Speaker 1 Definitely not, but like, I'm in my head about it because of all these stories. And a girl walks out in like

Speaker 1 this beautiful like corset skirt set, but it's actually a white base with flowers all over it. And she goes, oh, I was thinking the same thing.
My friend's having her bridal shower this weekend.

Speaker 1 And like, I'm, I really like this. And I was like, don't do it.
Don't do it. I told her, I was like, don't do it.
That's too close.

Speaker 3 Okay, now to this one.

Speaker 1 This is actually a blue dress.

Speaker 2 It's definitely blue.

Speaker 1 This, this is blue. Quite literally blue.

Speaker 2 Okay, but what I said, I still stand by. I think that if you were close to the bride, like maybe just show it.

Speaker 2 I think maybe this should just be the standard so that they can't come back at you and be a jerk to you about it. Because if the mother of the groom would have asked, asked, Is this dress appropriate?

Speaker 2 And then they said yes, then they can't yell at her for it in the future, which again, it is appropriate, and so it's absolutely ridiculous.

Speaker 2 But I think maybe we just need to make this be a standard so people can't hold it against other people. Let's just ask the dress, even if it's literally blue, full-on blue.

Speaker 1 Let's just ask moving forward. I think if you're

Speaker 1 that close, immediate family, best friends, I think you should ask. But, like, here's the thing: there's literally a sub Reddit now on Reddit called like wedding appropriate appropriate attire, right?

Speaker 1 And people gas like the fuck out of you in there. There was someone who posted a dress and it was like the bride and she was like, my mother-in-law sent me this picture.

Speaker 1 Do you guys think this dress is appropriate? And it's a picture of this white base dress with gold flowers all over it. Okay.

Speaker 1 And everyone in the comments was like, yeah, that looks really nice. That's such a beautiful dress.
It's not bridal. It's not wedding dress at all.
She should be able to wear that.

Speaker 1 People were popping off in the comments. So

Speaker 1 I remembered that post, right? Yeah.

Speaker 1 I'm now shopping for like rehearsal dress, for like rehearsal dinner dresses and wedding dresses and all this shit. I end up on the MacDougal website.
Same person that made my prom dress.

Speaker 1 I don't know. Okay.
Designer. Okay.
But like affordable. Got it.
And I'm on MacDougall and I go to bridal options. Guess what is listed as an option for bridal dresses? That one.

Speaker 1 That same fucking dress that the mother-in-law was trying to wear. MacDoodle doesn't come up on a Google search or shopping and blah, blah, blah, blah.

Speaker 1 You have to go to MacDougall and go under dresses. It's under bridal dresses.
No, it's not acceptable to wear to a wedding. Whoa.
Justin's mom, I think I've scared the shit out of her.

Speaker 1 And I'm not a bridezilla, you guys. I'm like, I'm so chill.
Ask Lauren. Yet.
Talking really fast right now. No, you don't know.

Speaker 2 I'm so chill. We don't know you in a few months.
No, I'm so chill.

Speaker 1 But I think Justin's mom, because of these stories and like, I don't know, she's scared too. She sends me a picture of every dress she's like considering.

Speaker 1 And she just sent me like this light pink one. She goes, Is this too light? I think it's too light.
And I go, That's probably too light.

Speaker 3 It's better than the opposite.

Speaker 1 No, I love that she's sending me that. Yeah.
But I can tell because she's sending me like dark blue options. Yeah.
And I like, I genuinely think she's really scared.

Speaker 2 No, I honestly, I'm not even kidding. I know that sounds ridiculous, but I'm like, let's just make that the standard moving forward so that we don't have to deal with this anymore.

Speaker 2 Cause it's, I just, it's so annoying. Like, it's so annoying that people

Speaker 2 that this is like a constant conversation where I'm like, let's just, even if it literally is like black, let's just send it. Be like, is this white?

Speaker 1 Right.

Speaker 2 Is this okay?

Speaker 3 I just, for me, this,

Speaker 3 after seeing the picture, this is not fit in the category of forgive.

Speaker 3 No. And like, forgive, but never forget.
It's not one of those. This is a

Speaker 3 no forgive needed and should have been forgotten a long time ago. Why are we, it feels like Jennifer.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 3 sounds like you're mispronouncing Jennifer every word?

Speaker 1 Don't slander the Jennifers out there

Speaker 3 All I think is that she has some kind of bone to pick with her because this is doesn't seem big enough to draw out and no matter what argument comes up This is like your first thing you're throwing back, even if you're in the wrong.

Speaker 3 It's like no well you were white to my wedding like no stop. No, let's drop it.
We're gonna be done with that. Otherwise, this family is gonna fall apart because I can't deal with it.

Speaker 1 It already is. Like, Jennifer has it out for her, the mom, clearly.
And we kind of find out why. Like,

Speaker 1 OP was asked, like, explain like Jennifer's behavior towards the family regarding wedding planning. And OP was like, We weren't involved in the wedding planning, not by our choice.
We were excluded.

Speaker 1 She's definitely not shy. Everything started after she fought with my other sister-in-law, Galinda.
And my mom took Galinda's side. And ever since then, she just goes berserk towards the family.

Speaker 1 I actually defended Jennefer that time, but when Jennefer started a vendetta against my nephews, literally toddlers, I said, enough is enough. And then I became another enemy.

Speaker 1 See? Jennefer is just

Speaker 1 kind of goofy. Oh, so they're on him.

Speaker 2 Yeah, they're fake names then, right? Because we don't have like a Jennifer and a Galinda both in the same story.

Speaker 1 Yeah, we need a full list of the family names. Yeah, I mean, all the names are quoted except Jennifer.
So it makes me think Jennifer is real, but Galinda is fake. Okay.

Speaker 2 Yeah, that would make sense. I'm like, there's no way that there's a Galinda in this story, too.
No.

Speaker 1 But guess what, you guys? What? We get an update.

Speaker 1 Hi, guys. Some people have asked for an update for my story.
I tried to approach it calmly and used many of the amazing arguments you all shared.

Speaker 1 He did acknowledge that it wasn't really about the dress, but more about the person wearing it, which honestly brought me some clarity.

Speaker 1 I tried to go deeper and address the root issues that have driven this divide in our family.

Speaker 1 For some context, I moved abroad to study for my master's, and shortly after, George and Jennifer announced their wedding dates. I wasn't able to celebrate or support him through any of it.

Speaker 1 Still, I tried to reach for a compromise, traveling over 28 hours just to be there, but their date was right before my thesis defense, so I asked if they could consider adjusting it slightly.

Speaker 1 The response I got was: quote, our personal life doesn't revolve around you. That absolutely crushed me.
Many of you asked what our relationship was like before Jennifer entered the picture.

Speaker 1 The truth is, I always considered George my best friend. He's five years older than me, and growing up, he saw the struggles I went through from our parents.

Speaker 1 He always tried to shield me from it, and I loved him deeply for that. I'll be honest, my family is far from perfect.

Speaker 1 My mom has her own mental health struggles, and my dad is narcissistic and controlling. They divorced when I was 13, and George was 18.

Speaker 1 Despite everything, my mom fought tooth and nail for a fair alimony to support both George and me. And I've worked hard to understand, forgive, and appreciate how far she's come.

Speaker 1 But something in George has changed. Suddenly, we all became villains in his narrative.
The bond we once had, the years of mutual support and shared struggles vanished.

Speaker 1 Now, everything revolves around Jennifer being the victim, and the rest of us are painted as threats or enemies. I supported them from the start.

Speaker 1 I recognized the power imbalance and knew they'd need allies. But the moment I pointed out that they too might be contributing to the tension, I became the problem.

Speaker 1 I could say so much more, but right now I just feel numb. I lost my brother and I felt completely broken.
Thank you all for your support, your kind words, and your advice.

Speaker 1 It means more than I can say. Damn, this is sad.

Speaker 3 Scary how that can happen, too.

Speaker 1 Yeah. All over a dress.

Speaker 1 Well, not all. All over a partner.
No, yeah. The dress.

Speaker 3 It's a partner. Like a partner can take your closest friend, your closest sibling,

Speaker 3 a parent, completely away from you.

Speaker 1 Yeah. And I mean, there's a lot of context in that update that we didn't have in the original post.
Like, Opie kind of alluded, like, yeah, our family dynamics are a little strained.

Speaker 1 There's some struggle there. But like finding this out now, like,

Speaker 1 I don't know, like you almost wonder,

Speaker 1 and I don't want to like,

Speaker 1 I don't know, I don't want to imply too much about OP's life, but we have seen it in other stories where like maybe that person writing isn't as like attuned yet to what everyone went through and George is five years older.

Speaker 1 Maybe George shielded you and maybe George is tired. Maybe George is cutting off his toxic family, like air quotes on that, right? But maybe that's George's point of view.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 Maybe Maybe George is done. Right.
And maybe he's so hurt by the mom and the dad and whatever happened that George is like, if you're going to stick up for mom and not have my back, I'm done. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Like, it'd be interesting to see what side we get from George and Jennefer. Yeah, I agree.
Out of curiosity. True, yeah.
And then there's also that third side, right?

Speaker 2 Like, there's definitely a lot of different storylines involved and we don't have the full storyline of from an objective point of view.

Speaker 2 But I do think that no matter what the issues are that are going on, I think it's pretty immature of George to continue to blame the mom for a dress,

Speaker 2 even if the mom had other issues going on and he was having struggles with her, to continue to bring up the dress like just shows that he also is not really there yet either in terms of like an emotional maturity because that that's just like a cop out.

Speaker 1 Yeah, well, and he's now admitting it's not about the dress. It's about who wore it.
Right.

Speaker 1 So let's stop bringing the dress up as an excuse. Let's talk about the root of why you're upset.
Yeah, you hurt me. I want an apology.
Yeah. Yeah.

Speaker 1 It's not about the dress. You're right.
It's not. Yeah.
I'm still hurt over 10 years of you not

Speaker 1 being a good parent. Or that's how I feel.
Whatever.

Speaker 2 So he said that directly to the mom.

Speaker 1 No, I think that's what he, I think, confronted with like what people were saying on Reddit. Right.
So it's like, it's tough. Like, family stuff is tough.

Speaker 2 Yeah. I just, I don't think it sounds like

Speaker 1 there's a lot here. Yeah.
They need to maybe do family therapy or maybe honestly, both sides just need to move on. Sometimes that's healthiest for everyone.

Speaker 3 Despite therapy or the deepest, most connected conversations you can have, sometimes that is just the answer is it'll just, you'll never all mesh together as one big happy family,

Speaker 3 which is a big thing to learn in life. You know, it's, it's like, it, it extends, you know, past family, friends, everything.

Speaker 3 It's amazing to think, like, oh, we can all go do this, but at some point,

Speaker 3 you got to learn that it just isn't always perfect like that.

Speaker 2 No, I just feel sad for OP that she feels her brother was her best friend and that she lost her best friend and huge loss. And that she feels kind of blindsided.

Speaker 1 Yeah, because, you know, OP does mention they're in therapy working through it. You know, there's a lot here.
There's a lot of comments from OP.

Speaker 1 And we would be here for another hour on just this story if I went through them all. Okay.
So the link will be in the description if you want to dive in and really do a little sleuthing on your own.

Speaker 1 But, you know, it's clear that OP is trying to do the work and trying to go through therapy and trying to just, you know, keep her family together because she loves everyone.

Speaker 1 And sometimes you just can't do that. But yeah, it's, I mean, it's a huge loss.
Like you kind of said, Lauren, it's just

Speaker 1 really tough.

Speaker 1 But

Speaker 1 we're going to move along. Okey-dokey.

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Speaker 1 This episode is brought to you by Spotify Portal for Backstage. But you're wondering, what's Portal?

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Documentation is automated and easy to maintain.

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Speaker 1 Okay, are we ready for this next one? Duh.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 Yes, queen.

Speaker 1 So this is coming from our slash relationship advice, five days old. It is not safe for work, everyone.

Speaker 1 So if you are one of our little work friends sitting in your cubicle playing this on blast, if you're doing that, I have so much respect for you. I was going to say,

Speaker 2 how is any of this safe for work? Like, this whole show should be a not safe for work.

Speaker 1 That's true.

Speaker 3 But I actually play it out loud because then

Speaker 1 this next story does have that

Speaker 1 warning, so I ought to give it.

Speaker 3 Okay, it's a good warning.

Speaker 1 So, this next one is titled My 31 Female Husband, 33 Male, and I haven't been the same since he moaned something strange during sex.

Speaker 1 How do I approach this?

Speaker 1 Throwaway account because people we know use Reddit and I don't want them to know about our sex life.

Speaker 1 My husband and I have been married for almost two years now and nothing like this has happened in our relationship before.

Speaker 1 We've always been very open with each other and we both like to hash out problems before they escalate. One of the first things that drew me to to him was his brutal honesty.

Speaker 1 We also have or had a pretty regular and healthy sex life, never having problems with infidelity or anything of a similar vein. In short, our relationship is more or less perfect.

Speaker 1 Until the other night, my husband and I were going at it when he said something pretty strange. Everything was normal until I heard him moan, hoobie-dooby.

Speaker 2 I don't understand. Could you please give me the version?

Speaker 1 Hoobie doobie.

Speaker 3 Oh my god.

Speaker 1 There's no way.

Speaker 1 At first, I thought that I had misheard him, but no, he completely froze and looked mortified. I was just confused.
Mood ruined. Scooby-Dooby-Doobie.

Speaker 1 I asked him about it, but all he did was take his pillow and leave.

Speaker 1 His pillow.

Speaker 1 I knew he was going to go sleep on the couch, which isn't something he's had to do since we first moved in together. Not going to get into that.

Speaker 1 We spent the night apart and in the morning went about our routines as normal. When he got home from work, I tried to bring it up, but he pretended not to hear me and kept watching TV.

Speaker 1 It's been a couple of days and I haven't brought it up since. However, there's been an air of awkwardness between us and I don't think we can truly move past this without discussing it.

Speaker 1 I was hoping he'd be the one to bring it up first, but that hasn't been the case. I don't know what Hoobie Doobie means.

Speaker 1 I have theories about maybe it being an anime character as he enjoys watching that kind of stuff, but to me, it doesn't sound like someone's name.

Speaker 1 If anyone knows what or who Hoobie Doobie is or has any ideas on how to approach this with him, please let me know. Thank you.

Speaker 2 You would think it's someone because why would why would he be that embarrassed? Why wouldn't he just laugh and be like, I don't know what I just came out of my mouth?

Speaker 1 To just like take your pillow, take your things and leave.

Speaker 3 I love that he did that so

Speaker 3 like he does it every week. Like, oh, all right.

Speaker 1 I'm in trouble again. Off to the couch.
Yeah. No, No, that's crazy.

Speaker 1 That's crazy. I mean, if you search Hoobie-Doobie character, the only thing that comes up is Scoobt Scooby-Doo.

Speaker 1 Which I had no idea his name was Scoobt. Me neither.

Speaker 3 I wish I didn't know that.

Speaker 2 But I do feel proud that I referenced Scooby-Doo not knowing that.

Speaker 1 I mean, this is so interesting. I'm like, where did this come from? I'm going to change the word character to H.

Speaker 3 Who says his name is Scoobt?

Speaker 1 The author?

Speaker 3 The original author? Just said, oh, yeah, his nickname.

Speaker 1 Scoobt, Scooby-Doo.

Speaker 3 That's his real name. I thought I had watched a lot of Scooby-Doo when I was young, but apparently not.

Speaker 1 Yeah, that's the vibe. Scoobt.

Speaker 3 I really don't know how to

Speaker 3 explain this one or think through it because

Speaker 3 this isn't the norm. Usually it's a name, you know, whatever.
Yeah.

Speaker 2 Sounds like an Adam Sandler movie.

Speaker 1 It would seem like it'd be an Adam Sandler thing, like a hoobie-doobie, smoke that droint. Like, I don't know.
It's, it is giving that.

Speaker 2 Is anime ever not a cartoon?

Speaker 2 I thought anime was always cartoon, right?

Speaker 3 Yeah, I guess unless you're at like a convention and people dress up like the characters, but but no, anime is usually always cartoon.

Speaker 1 So I don't know.

Speaker 3 Anime, isn't that like short for animation?

Speaker 2 That's that's what I was gonna say.

Speaker 1 In some sense, isn't that really? I don't know.

Speaker 2 I don't know either.

Speaker 3 making up things on the spot

Speaker 2 that works

Speaker 1 it is a shortened version of animation nice look at that nice yeah but that's why i think it'd be a stretch to think that he would

Speaker 2 have like an anime

Speaker 1 love i mean it's a cartoon but he likes to watch that i don't know the thing but nothing nothing comes up when i type hoobie doobie anime

Speaker 1 so i don't know it's so interesting he moaned it too just like

Speaker 3 the thing that sucks is you'll never, ever, truly know.

Speaker 1 He'll taller.

Speaker 1 You think he'll lie?

Speaker 1 Why not just admit it? Well, sure, he may.

Speaker 3 Marian may, but you'll never know for sure if that is the truth. You'll never know exactly what was going on in his brain.

Speaker 1 Ever.

Speaker 1 Top comment. Maybe he will.

Speaker 1 The top comment on this one. Is your husband a sim?

Speaker 1 Oh, I'm so glad someone else had this thought. The next comment says, I was thinking has a secret Sims fetish, but yours is more fun.

Speaker 1 Is this something they say on Sims?

Speaker 2 I was going to say, am I too old for this? Am I too young for this? I'm missing the

Speaker 1 Shooby-Dooby in the context of The Sims is likely a reference to the nonsensical language spoken by the characters

Speaker 1 known as Simlish.

Speaker 1 Whoa.

Speaker 2 When they're in the bedroom together?

Speaker 1 I don't know.

Speaker 3 Can you get in the bedroom and Sim?

Speaker 1 Hoobie-Doobie.

Speaker 2 Why would you be embarrassed, though, that I would

Speaker 2 think he would laugh? Like, oh,

Speaker 1 he said, hoobie-doobie.

Speaker 1 But I don't know. Maybe Simlish, it's all the same.
I'm not a Simser. I don't know.
I'm sorry, guys.

Speaker 3 Any gibberish just can be attributed to Sims-lish?

Speaker 1 Yeah, now I'm curious what they sound like.

Speaker 2 I did play Sims a little bit when I would

Speaker 2 hang out at my friend's place.

Speaker 1 I would never play it at home.

Speaker 2 Well, no, I just, think that I didn't have the

Speaker 2 whatever it was that you'd buy to have it. And so I'd play it sometimes with her, and it was fun.
Definitely was entertaining.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 3 I was a Club Penguin guy.

Speaker 1 I don't know what that is.

Speaker 1 I was really, really dorky, and I played

Speaker 1 the horse game.

Speaker 1 Well, I played Horseland, and then Horseland blew up, and they sold and made it into a TV show. But I played Horseland when it was literally just an online game like Club Penguin.

Speaker 1 And then there was another one called Equiverse.

Speaker 1 Nice.

Speaker 2 That was super weird. Oh, my God.
This just reminded me that one of my old neighbors, which I didn't know, watched the show.

Speaker 1 Oh, no.

Speaker 2 Reached out to me and asked me when I was telling you guys about the story when a little kid was running after me and my friend with an axe in the neighborhood. Yeah.

Speaker 2 And my, like, this, my old neighbor DM'd me and was like, was it so-and-so?

Speaker 1 And I was like, no way.

Speaker 1 That's hilarious. That's so funny.

Speaker 1 A lot of other comments from people, mostly getting into Simlish language. Sul Sul,

Speaker 1 Takera Wolga,

Speaker 1 Bana Snala.

Speaker 1 That was a good one. Confragu garlinga.

Speaker 2 This is starting to sound like Justin's son Teletubbies.

Speaker 1 It reminds me of you in Germany. Don't do that.
That Peter Griffin meme. Nope, don't do that.

Speaker 2 When he tries to speak French.

Speaker 1 It was a good time.

Speaker 1 Someone else goes, maybe he just really loves this song. And they link a song that is titled Oobi Doobie by Roy Orbison.

Speaker 1 Maybe.

Speaker 3 That's weird.

Speaker 1 Like, why?

Speaker 3 You're just getting... No.
Come on.

Speaker 1 This is getting really stretched out. But why when Obi tried to bring it up? Why did he get so weird about it? Just hey, admit it.

Speaker 2 His secret.

Speaker 1 He thought he was dreaming. I don't know.
Well, guess what?

Speaker 3 It could be a nickname.

Speaker 1 We have an update. Is it a nickname?

Speaker 2 Did you not hear what she said?

Speaker 1 It's a weird nickname.

Speaker 3 And I also like,

Speaker 3 if that's someone's little nickname, saying it in bed,

Speaker 1 you couldn't ever do that.

Speaker 2 Is that your moan, Morgan?

Speaker 2 It's pretty weak. Go a little harder.

Speaker 1 Let me hear yours.

Speaker 2 No, no, no, no, no, no.

Speaker 1 That's what I thought. Yeah, okay.

Speaker 2 Got him.

Speaker 1 Got me. Yeah, I can't stand the heat.
Get out the kitchen. Is this a we fighting? Yeah.

Speaker 2 That's kind of cute.

Speaker 1 Did you hear that? We have an update.

Speaker 3 Yeah. Waiting for it.

Speaker 1 First of all, I'd like to say thank you for all the helpful and funny comments. They showed me the humor in this situation.
Now, the moment you've all been waiting for. What is hoobie-doobie?

Speaker 1 Last night after dinner, I sat down with my husband and I brought it up. I reassured him that it was nothing to be embarrassed about and that I was just curious.

Speaker 1 He was reluctant to share at first, but it didn't take long for him to open up. For context, my husband is in a bowling league and he goes bowling with his friends every other week.

Speaker 1 While he does this, I stay home and have some of my girlfriends over, so I don't know much about what goes on. As it turns out, he's been thinking of bowling to stop himself from arriving early and

Speaker 1 hooby-doobie is his bowling catchphrase oh my god which isn't something that i knew existed

Speaker 1 this is so good

Speaker 1 we could have never guessed this

Speaker 1 at first i was surprised but then it turned out to be hilarious and we both laughed about it

Speaker 1 Safe to say, I've never loved this man more.

Speaker 1 Also, it wasn't whooby-doobie that compelled me to make this post, it was his reaction. I would never let the words hooby-doobie ruin our wonderful marriage.

Speaker 1 Again, I can't thank you all enough for the kind words, hoobie-doobie to all and to all a good night.

Speaker 3 Did he say that? Like when he gets a strike or something, hoobie-doobie!

Speaker 3 Where did that?

Speaker 3 I still want to know the origin of it.

Speaker 3 I don't know. Where did that phrase come from?

Speaker 1 I've never heard of a bowling catchphrase. We were literally just bowling a couple nights ago.
Yeah. No one there had a catchphrase.

Speaker 2 You guys figured out how bad I am at bowling, but how it seems like I should be good. It's really good.

Speaker 1 We're going to go practice under different circumstances. You were a bridemaid.
Bridesmaid? What?

Speaker 2 I was a bridge.

Speaker 1 Bradmaiden.

Speaker 1 You had a long day. We're going to go again.

Speaker 2 No, that happens every time. I don't know why you're excusing it.

Speaker 1 We're going to go again. I was a groomman.

Speaker 1 Fuck off.

Speaker 1 But what would your bowling catchphrase be if you had one?

Speaker 2 Hoobie-doobie.

Speaker 1 Well, now.

Speaker 2 No, it would be, it would be,

Speaker 2 noodles is wasted.

Speaker 1 Mine would be Lightning McQueen's Ka-Chow.

Speaker 3 No, it would be the cha-ching.

Speaker 1 Oh, my gosh. My little shop, if I add ka-ching,

Speaker 1 that probably would be, mm-hmm. I love that.
Cha-ching.

Speaker 2 What's yours?

Speaker 3 Maybe a fart.

Speaker 1 You don't fart. You fucking fake.

Speaker 3 Mine, honestly. You know what I think would be great?

Speaker 1 I'm just kidding.

Speaker 3 I just whip out an air horn. It's like, beep.

Speaker 1 What about that submarine? Aruga. No.

Speaker 2 Speaking of, I just watched the Titanic

Speaker 2 20-year like recap with James Cameron last night.

Speaker 1 Did you see the new LIDAR thing, the new sensors that they sent down? No, does it make that sound? Is that why you're reminded? It does. They sent these two robots down, right?

Speaker 1 And these robots spent like hours and hours.

Speaker 1 I think it was like 28 hours recording the Titanic in LiDAR, so then they could then take the data and like they made this room with screens 100 feet tall to like

Speaker 1 make it real.

Speaker 1 Guess what? They named these two robots: what Romeo and Juliet,

Speaker 1 Jack, and Rose was right there.

Speaker 2 Oh my god.

Speaker 3 Did Did they get paid? Are they part of the Sea Org?

Speaker 1 Probably a part of Scientology.

Speaker 1 Sea Org for sure.

Speaker 2 Speaking of adventures, how about them pretty ladies in space?

Speaker 1 That's going to be my new, how about them Yankees? What? What do you mean? Like the girls that went up to space. Oh, yeah.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 That's all. That's all I got.

Speaker 2 Moving on.

Speaker 1 Yeah, we're not.

Speaker 1 I don't want to be mean today.

Speaker 1 So we're going to, we're going to move. We're going to go.
Next one. You're going to be mean? To who? Haven't you seen the memes about

Speaker 1 that space thing?

Speaker 1 No?

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 2 Send them to me later.

Speaker 1 I will. There's a video of Jeff.

Speaker 1 There's a video of Jeff Bezos running around the space capsule and he falls.

Speaker 1 It's so funny.

Speaker 1 But again, I just, I'm trying to be nicer today. I don't know.
Anyways,

Speaker 1 moving along.

Speaker 1 I'm going to pat my eyes now.

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Speaker 4 This episode is brought to you by Nordstrom. Oh, what fun.
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Speaker 4 Like beauty and grooming sets, Ugg gifts, jewelry, and toys. Neat ideas? Check out gifts from UGG, Skims, Dipteek, Free People, Stanley, and more.

Speaker 4 Plus, explore their amazing gift shop in stores and online. Free gift finding help, free shipping, and order pickup make it all easy at Nordstrom.

Speaker 1 Okay, this next one. It's coming from AITAH, six days old.
It is titled, Am I the Asshole for Faking a Haunted House to get my boyfriend to move out because he refused to leave after we broke up?

Speaker 1 I, 28 female, broke up with my boyfriend, Steve, 31 male, six months ago. We had had been living together, and after the breakup, I gave him plenty of time to find a new place.

Speaker 1 He kept saying things like,

Speaker 1 I just need a little more time. The market's crazy, and I can't find a place that allows ferrets.
More ferrets? He doesn't have a ferret.

Speaker 1 I don't know why he said that.

Speaker 1 He wants noodles. He said the other story.

Speaker 2 He wants noodles to come over and hang out.

Speaker 1 Fast forward to month six, and this man is still leaving beard trimmings in the sink and playing Skyrim until 3 a.m.

Speaker 1 I was losing it. So naturally, I decided to haunt my own apartment.
Hell yeah. Brilliant.
I started small. Whispers through the vents, flickering lights.

Speaker 1 I bought an old porcelain doll from Facebook Marketplace and moved it to different locations every night.

Speaker 1 I whispered, get out, Steven, into my phone, slowed it down 800%, and made it play from inside the walls via a Bluetooth speaker.

Speaker 1 I even got my friend who does special effects makeup to pretend to be a Victorian child ghost in the hallway mirror. Steve started losing sleep.

Speaker 1 He saged the place, bought holy water, and started talking to the doll like it was real.

Speaker 1 Then one night, he packed a bag, looked me dead in the eyes, and said,

Speaker 1 quote, the spirits have chosen you. I can't fight them anymore.
And he left.

Speaker 2 Goodbye, Steve.

Speaker 1 He's now living with his sister. I've reclaimed my space.
The doll is in my closet, and sometimes I still whisper at it for fun. Now here's where it gets spicy.

Speaker 1 Steve found out it was me. My friend posted behind-the-scenes pics of the ghost makeup on her Instagram.

Speaker 1 He saw it and messaged me a very long paragraph calling me a manipulative monster with a flair for the theatrical.

Speaker 1 So cute. Wow.

Speaker 1 Which honestly was kind of flattering. Yeah.
My friends are divided. Half say I'm a genius and deserve a Netflix deal.

Speaker 1 The other half say I should have just kicked him out the normal way, and that gaslighting via ghosts might be ethically questionable.

Speaker 2 Whatever.

Speaker 1 So, am I the asshole for faking a full-on haunting to evict my emotionally clingy ex no no you gave him time six months is a that's a chunk of change that's half a year god this sounds like so much fun oh

Speaker 3 that's scary i thought you were gonna say and then it things got spicy I thought you were gonna say he left and things started happening there.

Speaker 1 That's me too. She invited it in.

Speaker 2 I thought you were gonna say things got spooky.

Speaker 1 And so then I was like, and then the doll started moving on again. had to leave too.

Speaker 3 And then I thought it was going to be this whole PSA, like, don't fuck with the spirits.

Speaker 1 Yeah, dude. I, as someone who feels they've had a paranormal experience.

Speaker 3 Or two.

Speaker 1 What yours?

Speaker 3 No, like you've had multiple.

Speaker 1 What's the second one? I really only remember Palm Springs.

Speaker 3 I mean, that's the big one.

Speaker 2 That was, that one like, was life-changing for me.

Speaker 1 I'm like, there's no doubt spirits are real after that one.

Speaker 2 So scary.

Speaker 1 Terrifying.

Speaker 2 When you see lights flicker and hear footsteps down a hall you were like that was during coachella when we went and you were like oh my god we could like stay at my place and i'm like

Speaker 2 oh my god no

Speaker 1 yeah well it was free but it's fine we got a free place anyway we did it was very nice very nice very nice um

Speaker 1 yeah I don't know. Ghosts are really scary.
I feel like she could have opened a portal. This might have been a little risky to do, a little risky, but it worked.
I don't think the asshole.

Speaker 1 I think he had six months and he was not trying to leave. He was waiting for you to rekindle the flame.

Speaker 3 No, there was no actual progress. Like, it wasn't, you know, oh, I'm checking out this place.
I'm going to this place. It's all these bigger excuses.
Timing's not right.

Speaker 3 You know, the economy, this, that. There was no effort being made.
Just comfortable, riding, chilling.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I think that while it

Speaker 2 would have been maybe nice uh actually no i think this was the nicer way to do it it's just sad that he found out

Speaker 1 yeah why why did the friend post it on instagram

Speaker 1 keep it secretive right close friends close friends is a better way to do it yeah

Speaker 1 before i read the top comment what's your overall vote asshole not the asshole wait i want to know what people are going to say

Speaker 1 definitely not they're going to say not the asshole mine's not the asshole top comment at this point in time has been deleted.

Speaker 1 But I do have screenshots and it did say, you're not the asshole. He had six months to move out and still didn't get the hint.

Speaker 1 If he's emotionally clingy enough to stay in a breakup for that long, a little paranormal push doesn't sound too over the top.

Speaker 1 He'll have plenty of time to reflect with his spirits while living at his sister's. Next comment down, OP better be careful though.

Speaker 1 By pretending that her house is haunted, she risks offending the ghosts who are already there.

Speaker 1 I recommend using a Ouija board to communicate with the real ghosts and make sure they are okay with the fake ghosts.

Speaker 3 Yeah, same.

Speaker 1 I don't think you bring a Ouija board. I think we do that.

Speaker 3 I think we go home and do that. Make sure everyone's cool.
Like, hey, we didn't, you know, we're not doing anything. Anything you'd like to change? We'll put up different art for you or something.

Speaker 1 We just want to be cool with you. Do you remember the story we had? It was on Father Know Something, our other podcast that we do with my dad.
If you guys don't know, come over and listen.

Speaker 1 But we did a spooky episode, and one of our listeners actually can really connect with spirits and made a Ouija board to connect with a past grandparent of theirs or a friend.

Speaker 1 And they said that you're actually not supposed to use the Ouija board from like the store. You're supposed to make your Ouija board so that every time you use it, you burn it or like discard of it.

Speaker 1 So like the spirits can't cling to it. So if anyone out there has a Ouija board, you shouldn't be using that one.
You should be making one every time.

Speaker 2 How is it that people think that like a board and like a piece of plastic is going to bring like spirits to it? Like, how do people think they're that magical?

Speaker 1 You're gonna have to test one out and find out.

Speaker 3 You know what? That's between you and the audience at this point.

Speaker 1 You and Justin can go together. I don't want none of that.
You don't, you've been saying you want a spiritual experience.

Speaker 3 No, I'm not calling out the Ouija boards.

Speaker 1 You believe Ouija boards are real?

Speaker 3 I've wanted to make make one forever.

Speaker 1 I just don't do it in our house.

Speaker 3 I'm coming this month only. If you join Patreon, Lauren, Justin, Morgan.

Speaker 1 Don't drop me in a minute.

Speaker 3 Make a Ouija board live and communicate live, but this month only. So make sure you go join on Patreon.

Speaker 2 No, no, no, no, no. So I may be trolling the fact that a Ouija board is likely not legit, but at the same time, I'm not going to risk it.

Speaker 1 I ain't going to risk it. I feel like Alejandra.

Speaker 1 I think Alejandra's played with one in the past and she felt it move.

Speaker 2 Well, okay. So I think when I was a little kid, I did one at a sleepover.

Speaker 2 And it's always because you have like 12 girls having a hand on it. So somebody moves it between the two.

Speaker 1 But I think it was only her and one other person. And they both were like, I really did not move that.
Like the spirit moved it.

Speaker 1 I don't know.

Speaker 1 I don't know.

Speaker 3 I don't know. This month only.
Come to Patreon.

Speaker 2 You

Speaker 1 are going to go and meet with a spiritualist and you can go on a Ouija board feel charming.

Speaker 3 I'm going to meet with nobody. I'll do it right here.

Speaker 1 We are not doing it in any space I have to encounter.

Speaker 3 Parking lot.

Speaker 1 Too close. Still too close.

Speaker 2 Yeah. My mom, when I came back from that sleepover, my mom was like, Lauren, don't ever mess with those.
And my mom doesn't... Didn't talk like that.

Speaker 2 So that's why I'm like, no matter what, I'm not going to mess with one.

Speaker 1 There's

Speaker 1 spirits are out there, y'all. If you've played with a Ouija board, tell us in the comments.
Tell us your story.

Speaker 1 Moving on.

Speaker 2 K-Rocket Power.

Speaker 1 Is that what they sound like? I mean, yeah.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 1 This one is coming from R/slash Advice. It is 11 hours old, titled, Boyfriend Told Me I'm Rushing Him into Marriage After Five Years of Dating.

Speaker 1 My boyfriend, male 31, and I, female 26, have been together for five years. We bought a house together three and a half years ago.
Everything is joint, bank accounts, car insurance, et cetera.

Speaker 1 We had a conversation a few weeks ago about getting married, and he told me that he doesn't like to feel rushed.

Speaker 1 The last time we talked about this was in September, and he told me that we'd be engaged in less than six months. Obviously, that didn't happen.
So now I don't know what to do.

Speaker 1 Our relationship is perfect otherwise. We usually communicate really well.
He's very attentive and loving. We still go out together and have date nights.

Speaker 1 He's told me many times before that he wants to marry me. I just don't understand why he won't propose.
So, my question is: how do I approach this topic again? Or should I even bring it up?

Speaker 1 Justin?

Speaker 3 I'm going to go first on this one.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 3 You guys are so much more in a relevant.

Speaker 3 Okay. Well, here's my thought.
I think you can only take the words, I want to marry you, to have really so much weight because it's really easy to say when you love someone.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 3 Oh, like, I'd love to marry you, blah, blah, blah. I'll propose in this.
I mean, he set the time limit on himself with that comment, but you're already basically married.

Speaker 3 Like, you're sharing bank accounts. You share a living space.
You're basically there. There's something within guys.

Speaker 3 And it may not just be guys, but I'm just speaking from your perspective. I think a lot of times it's super easy to say.
And then,

Speaker 3 I mean, in all these stories, there's a huge holdout.

Speaker 3 Well, what's the holdout? And then, you know, I'm curious what he said before when you've brought it up, because that would change how I would advise to go at it this time and ask.

Speaker 3 But you do have some, I mean, I don't want to call it ammo, but you have a lot of receipts based on him setting a time limit, him making these promises. It's like, why are you dragging your feet?

Speaker 3 So are we at ultimatum time? Like, hey, do you need to go figure out yourself? Obviously, that's very scary because you

Speaker 3 put your relationship at risk. Or, I mean, I guess you can sit back, but it really comes down to what you want.

Speaker 3 And if making that next step is super important to you,

Speaker 3 then you got to kind of find some way to s sort out, are you going to do it or not? Because I don't, I can't wait forever.

Speaker 1 Let's hear your thoughts, Lauren.

Speaker 2 Well, I think that I would ask him exactly what his hesitations are, considering what you said, Justin, they're living together and they're sharing bank accounts.

Speaker 2 Like, what is your hesitation of putting the label on it?

Speaker 2 And and just try to get him to be open and transparent about that.

Speaker 2 Because something, whenever I was younger, I had a boyfriend who we were literally boyfriend and girlfriend, but he didn't ask me yet. And I thought it was so weird and confusing.

Speaker 2 Why don't you want to put the label on it? And it made me feel like

Speaker 2 he didn't care about me the way I cared about him. But what he ended up saying is that his last relationship was so bad

Speaker 2 that when he thinks of the word girlfriend and boyfriend, it makes him think bad. And so he loved that we were just so happy and he was worried that once we put the label, it would turn bad.
Yeah.

Speaker 2 And then after that, we became, you know, we figured it out and we were boyfriend and girlfriend.

Speaker 2 But, um, but I'm just wondering, like, is it because he doesn't actually want to be in the marriage or is it because maybe his parents had a bad marriage and he's scared of the word?

Speaker 2 Because it, like you said, it sounds like you're basically doing it right now, the marriage thing. So

Speaker 2 what is the concern? Does he not want to spend the money on a wedding? Like, where is it that he's really feeling it?

Speaker 1 That's a really good point because I do think, Justin, you were kind of hesitant for that reason too. You like,

Speaker 1 we had a conversation. You were like, you know, everyone in my life, like, everyone's gotten divorced.
So like marriage is like kind of like this big thing that's like.

Speaker 1 kind of scary like my parents my aunt and uncle like like everyone has it almost kind of feels like a curse rather than like

Speaker 3 a good thing if you've, if you go through that.

Speaker 1 Yeah. So that's why he was hesitant, but yet was still saying, like, no, this is, this is what I want.
Like, it is important.

Speaker 1 But, like, he was so nervous for that because almost like that, where it's like, when you go from boyfriend and girlfriend to then married, what if it changes? And what if it gets bad?

Speaker 1 Because everything I've seen is bad. Right.
So maybe, maybe it is a little bit of that.

Speaker 1 But like after five years owning a house together, they've owned the house for three and a half years, meaning they bought the the house a year and a half into dating. Huge.
Yeah. Joint accounts.

Speaker 1 Everything's joint.

Speaker 1 Girl, you better start putting some money in your own account right now because that's ridiculous. No.

Speaker 1 But I don't know. There's something that's goofy, but it seems like every time she tries to approach it, it's like, I don't want to feel rushed.

Speaker 1 But it's like, but you said six months, you said six months. Like,

Speaker 1 don't, just don't lie to me because then it feels like I can't trust you. Yeah.
And I feel disappointed.

Speaker 1 And like feeling disappointed by something your partner does or says, like, that just is not a fun feeling. For sure.

Speaker 1 There's a comment here from someone with 1.2K up votes. Dude will be two years into raising their second child and be like, don't want to rush it.

Speaker 1 Next comment down, this sounds like my coworker and they've been together for 15 years now.

Speaker 1 Wow.

Speaker 1 Next comment down, yeah, I got a coworker who has been with her boyfriend for 18 years. She swears anyway, he will propose.
Five years is long enough.

Speaker 1 If he wanted to propose, he would have already, I feel like.

Speaker 1 And this is a very,

Speaker 1 this is a hot topic because you know how many videos I see of girls like

Speaker 1 breaking up because they're at like year three, year four, year five, year six, seven, eight, whatever. a decent amount of time.

Speaker 1 And then they're like crying on social media, which is valid, but they're like, like we broke up and he proposed to the next girl within six months like i was with him for five years and i wasn't enough but then she was there six months and he proposed

Speaker 1 and this is that theory where like

Speaker 1 you can be with someone right

Speaker 1 and someone has like 80 of what you're looking for but 80 isn't a hundred so you're like ah i don't want that it's not a hundred It's not right. I'm not going to propose.
So you break up.

Speaker 1 And then the next person you date has that 20% that was missing. And then they propose.

Speaker 3 Oh, that's what you think. Just that 20%.

Speaker 1 Someone's talked about it.

Speaker 3 But they're missing all of the other major.

Speaker 1 You're right. It could be.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 Someone's talked about.

Speaker 2 I was thinking someone who were referring to it more of like when you know, you know.

Speaker 1 Well, I mean, there's something holding him back, but there's also people that live by like, why are you giving wifey privileges without wifey status?

Speaker 1 Like, you should only be giving girlfriend privileges if you're only girlfriend. Yeah.

Speaker 2 No, I've seen that, that trend.

Speaker 1 We've talked about it before. Like Alejandra and I, I think, talked about it in an episode.
But like, it's kind of that where it's like, why buy the cow when you get the milk for free?

Speaker 1 No?

Speaker 2 What? Yeah, I don't know.

Speaker 1 What, what, what? What's that saying?

Speaker 2 I don't know.

Speaker 1 What? It's like, you're already getting everything.

Speaker 1 You're living this married life.

Speaker 1 Why change anything? What's the incentive? And then you get in your head and you're like, but you shouldn't have to be incentivized to get married because then that's not right.

Speaker 1 So maybe he's just not your person if it's something that's important to you.

Speaker 2 Well, that's why I just think it's like about getting to the bottom of it. Like, is it that

Speaker 2 he's just too hesitant because he's not sure about her? Or is it because he is scared of the word? Because it's like, or you know what I mean? Is there something going on psychologically with him?

Speaker 2 Or is it the fact that he just doesn't think that she's the right person?

Speaker 1 So we have some comments from OP. Let's hear it.
Well, I guess these were the answers I was expecting, LOL. One, no, we don't have kids.
Two, we make roughly the same amount of money.

Speaker 1 Three, marriage isn't a deal breaker for me. Just confused on why he says he wants to and then doesn't.
Four, joining bank accounts was a decision made with the insight of my dad.

Speaker 1 Probably not the best advice, I'll be honest, LOL.

Speaker 1 No, it is not. And go put money in your own account.
And then mortgage expenses and shared expenses in a joint. Thank you.

Speaker 1 Five, bought the house because we got a great deal. Six, our relationship is good.
Thank you all for the replies. Negative two upvotes right now.
Someone replies back to OP, if he wanted to, he would.

Speaker 1 Next comment down, well, he has all the perks of a live-in maid and cook, even if he pitches in. It's still not doing everything himself like he would need to.

Speaker 1 He's got a place to live that I bet neither of you could afford by yourselves, and he's got dink money, dual income, no kids. You two are basically roommates with privileges.

Speaker 1 This almost never turns out the way you are hoping. You are not living in a Hallmark movie.
You two need to have a very civil, very adult conversation.

Speaker 1 That feels like a little bit of tough love.

Speaker 1 Kind of liked it.

Speaker 3 Hey, yes, but I think you can also fall somewhere in the middle where she just said,

Speaker 3 hey, it's not a deal breaker for me. Yeah.
And if it's not, then what's the issue?

Speaker 1 Yeah, you're just, well, you're just kind of like, what's the deal with this?

Speaker 3 Because if you hadn't ever brought it up and made it a point, like, oh, I'm going to propose to you. I'm, I'm going to marry you.
And then it never happens. You're just kind of like.

Speaker 3 You know,

Speaker 3 like what?

Speaker 1 Yeah, it's more so the false promises, which is what I have a problem with. I think for me, I have a problem with people when they say they're going to do something and then they don't.

Speaker 1 And it just feels like such a letdown. And maybe that's on me and my trauma, but I'm triggered.

Speaker 2 I don't think you wanting people to do what they say they're going to do is like a trauma response. I think that's pretty normal.

Speaker 1 Thank you. Yeah.
I've been calling my mom. I called my mom every day this week and I'm like, hey, did you talk to your friend about the beer donkey and the camel?

Speaker 1 And she's like, she's not calling me back.

Speaker 1 And I'm like, ugh, this is why I feel like I can't depend on anyone. I have to do everything myself.
It's my trauma. I'm like, I need the beer burrow.
This is my Bridezilla moment.

Speaker 1 Where's my beer donkey?

Speaker 2 It's coming. It's starting now.
It's brewing.

Speaker 1 No. I'll just buy my own donkey.
They're not expensive. And then do what with it? I'm going to live at our house.

Speaker 2 With noodles. I'm not getting a ferret.

Speaker 1 I want noodles. OP does have a few more comments here.
I think it's more so than not sticking to his word is what I'm bothered by. Don't get me wrong.
I want to get married.

Speaker 1 But I think I could look past it if he would straight up tell me he doesn't want to get married. I always get an answer of one day or eventually.

Speaker 1 Like, just tell me that you don't want to get married and then let's move on.

Speaker 1 But you just said, it wasn't a deal breaker. I want to get married.
OP, right here. You just said, don't get me wrong.
I want to get married.

Speaker 1 But you're also saying it's not a deal breaker.

Speaker 2 I think that still works.

Speaker 1 I don't know. OP also adds: I never said anything about wanting a wedding, but we've already talked about that.

Speaker 1 My dad owns land, gonna have a little thing out there, potluck situation with our families, alcohol, some music. Definitely less than what we spent to buy a house, LOL.

Speaker 1 Which she's not wanting much. Yeah.
So he just doesn't want to marry you. And if you do want to get married,

Speaker 1 why settle?

Speaker 1 Why settle? Do we have updates?

Speaker 1 No updates.

Speaker 1 No updates. OP's account is ironically titled Fuck Me Sideways, Bro.

Speaker 1 Wow.

Speaker 1 Seems like a real account.

Speaker 1 OP shared a picture of their cat. Very cute black cat with

Speaker 1 bright

Speaker 1 yellow eyes. They look yellow to me.
Very cute cat, though. Oh, that's a man.
I love black cats.

Speaker 2 That is an old man. That's not a cat.

Speaker 1 I love a black cat.

Speaker 1 Dude, people need to stop making those AIs of their animals. It is creepy, disgusting.
Oh my God, I saw one of the best ones the other day. I don't want to see what your dog looks like.

Speaker 1 I need to show you.

Speaker 1 It's hilarious.

Speaker 2 I'm going to find it.

Speaker 1 But moving on to our last story of the night. Locally, vocally.

Speaker 2 Howdy, neighbor.

Speaker 1 Hoobie-doobie.

Speaker 1 Are we ready? Tissues? Yes, I do have tissues ready. I will try to get through this.

Speaker 1 I'm reading this with a point today.

Speaker 2 See, when you prep me, I probably won't cry.

Speaker 2 Okay, well, if you wanted tears, you probably just lost them.

Speaker 1 No, I really do want to keep it together.

Speaker 1 I don't love crying during these stories, but

Speaker 1 they're very emotional sometimes. I want to read this story because I think there's so much amazing, amazing support and love in this community.
And I think this person could really use some.

Speaker 1 So, this is coming from our very own Too Hot Takes subreddit. It's 18 days old.
It does not fit today's theme. But again, putting it in because I want to.
Bonus.

Speaker 1 It is titled, I'm 34, I'm Dying, and I'm Fucking Terrified. I have terminal brain cancer.
I'm not even sure I want to say what kind. Doesn't matter.
It's the kind that wins.

Speaker 1 Doctors are saying months, maybe less if things go south fast. I've tried to keep it together for my wife, my daughter.
She's not even three yet.

Speaker 1 My parents and friends, but I don't think I've ever been this scared in my life. People keep saying, stay strong, or just take it one day at a time.

Speaker 1 But how the fuck do you do that when every day is just one step closer to leaving the people you love behind?

Speaker 1 I look at my daughter and I wonder if she'll remember me at all. That's the part that's breaking me the most.
Will she remember how I made her pancakes?

Speaker 1 I wasn't gonna cry.

Speaker 1 Oh, God.

Speaker 1 How I did that dumb little bunny voice that always made her giggle? Or is she just going to grow up with photos and a couple of videos and that's it?

Speaker 1 I watch my wife trying to be strong and holding it together for everyone, and I know she cries in the bathroom, so I won't hear her. We haven't really talked about the end.

Speaker 1 We sort of pretend it's not real, or we talk in practicalities paperwork, insurance, what she'll need to do when I'm gone, but not about it.

Speaker 1 The actual not being here any more. I'm scared of the pain, yeah,

Speaker 1 but more than that, I'm scared of missing everything.

Speaker 1 Her first day of school, her reading her first book, her falling in love.

Speaker 1 Why did I do this to myself every time?

Speaker 1 I want to be there so badly, it physically hurts. I don't even know what I want from writing this.
I guess I just needed to say it out loud. I'm not strong, I'm not brave.

Speaker 1 I'm just a dad who's dying and doesn't want to leave his little girl behind.

Speaker 1 Thanks for reading.

Speaker 2 That's heartbreaking.

Speaker 1 It is heartbreaking.

Speaker 1 But

Speaker 1 I think there's so, so, so much you can do with your time.

Speaker 1 There's so much like

Speaker 1 you can do as far as like

Speaker 1 legacy building and writing letters to her for big events, first day of kindergarten, high school graduation, college graduation, first day of college, that's tough.

Speaker 1 Her wedding day.

Speaker 1 You know, if she has kids, her first little one.

Speaker 1 Oh, you got fired. What do you do next? Like,

Speaker 1 think of any

Speaker 1 life event that you've just needed to hug your parent and cry on their shoulder

Speaker 1 and write a letter for any of those events.

Speaker 1 There's There's so much you can do. Record videos, record your voice, just give her anything and everything you can.

Speaker 1 And I would really use the time to just build a legacy and just

Speaker 1 spend time with your family. And

Speaker 1 something I really want to do,

Speaker 1 and something like I really wish we would have done

Speaker 1 for my mom's partner who she lost, is I wish we would have had a funeral with him when he was here, like a true celebration of life.

Speaker 1 Get your friends and family together and have them bring pictures and put on funny slideshows about their favorite memories and like truly embrace this time you have left with your people. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Because nothing, like, nothing we say,

Speaker 1 sure, shit, not anything I say, is gonna make this better or easier.

Speaker 1 I'm so sorry you're going through this, but I'm sure people are gonna to have a lot of things to say in the comments and support for you.

Speaker 1 But I needed to make sure, as brutal as that probably was to listen to, that your story got out there.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 3 Well, I think it's also

Speaker 3 good for everyone to hear a story like this. And I'm glad it was submitted because

Speaker 3 I think a lot of us can get so wrapped up in our day-to-day routines and our problems that feel so huge,

Speaker 3 your bad moods,

Speaker 3 the person that cut you off this morning, all of that.

Speaker 3 And you really lose sight of what you do have.

Speaker 3 And I think when,

Speaker 3 you know, because we all do have an end,

Speaker 3 but you can't really see that end coming.

Speaker 3 When that end gets a lot closer, no matter if it's something like this, old age, whatever it may be, and you can see that end coming,

Speaker 3 the only thing you hope for is more time. All those little problems, everything else,

Speaker 3 it shows how meaningless that is, and it really shows you what the important things are.

Speaker 1 Yeah, life is short. Life is short, and you just need to appreciate every single day.

Speaker 3 But I do love what you said, though.

Speaker 1 The legacy stuff.

Speaker 3 Because

Speaker 3 you will be there.

Speaker 3 And

Speaker 3 by doing this, you'll also physically be there in some sense. Because we don't know what's after.
I mean, you

Speaker 3 may not be physically present in this life that we understand. You might be standing right up there being able to see all this happen and appreciate it.

Speaker 3 But one way you can guarantee you will physically be there is if you do those.

Speaker 1 I think that's

Speaker 1 brilliant. And the comments are amazing, community.
They were on it as well.

Speaker 1 Top comment, start writing letters for your daughter and wife and your wife for big milestones, like grad, turning certain areas, making videos for your daughter, reading bedtime stories with special books.

Speaker 1 That is amazing.

Speaker 1 I hope your journey is an easy one.

Speaker 1 Next comment, sobbing. This is such a great idea.
Wedding video. Put something together so you can walk her down the aisle, like a necklace or something she can wear.

Speaker 1 Get her jewelry with your handwriting on it, record your voice telling stories to her about her life, the pancakes, make a video of you in your kitchen, making pancakes, talking about the recipe.

Speaker 1 Have her there with you in the video. Yeah.
I'd record everything. I mean, there's a

Speaker 1 3D camera you have. It's a 3D camera.
Literally record this. It's not even an expensive camera.
VR camera. VR camera.
OP.

Speaker 1 If you can't afford it, I'm going to send you a message. So if you're hearing your story, please look at your messages.

Speaker 1 But we can get you this VR camera and you can literally record yourself just walking down like a straight line. By the time she's getting married, who knows what fucking technology we'll have?

Speaker 1 Maybe she can have literally a hologram. So

Speaker 1 please look at your messages.

Speaker 3 I think the other beautiful thing about VR cameras is whether it's

Speaker 3 a grandparent or in this case, it's you,

Speaker 3 you can preserve

Speaker 3 you, not just in photos.

Speaker 3 Because I think that's all, you know, that's what we kind of see of our great grandparents or something. Yeah.
It's, oh, here's, you know, your great grandpa.

Speaker 1 Videos are so special.

Speaker 3 But it's not even just a video.

Speaker 3 It's really incredible if you've never tried it. If you take a VR, I think you can even take the VR videos with your phone now.
You can.

Speaker 1 LIDAR for certain things.

Speaker 3 Yeah. And then if you upload those, there's a special YouTube VR.

Speaker 3 And once you put them up, you can essentially,

Speaker 3 if the camera was set up right,

Speaker 3 I could be sitting. She, the daughter, could be sitting right next to him on the couch and see him in totally three-dimensional.

Speaker 3 And it's just, it's incredible. It's, it's so much deeper than a picture or just a regular video.

Speaker 1 I think it's such a good idea.

Speaker 1 They could have dinner together.

Speaker 1 They could go to the store together. Like, I think record everything you can.

Speaker 2 Have you ever heard, too, that when you're little, let's say you're three years old, you can remember things from when you're three years old. And if

Speaker 2 somebody shows you a picture of something that you did when you're little, let's say you were

Speaker 2 putting blocks together, whatever it was, and they showed you this picture, and they keep showing you this picture.

Speaker 2 You keep that memory.

Speaker 2 Like you remember, you actually remember building blocks as like a three-year-old because you keep, you are constantly reminded of it from this picture, but you actually, you remember it because you're reconfirming the memory.

Speaker 1 Exactly. You're recommitting it to long-term.

Speaker 3 It's crazy when you do reconnect. Oh my God.
It's the, that feeling of when you actually connect with something that

Speaker 1 for

Speaker 3 like your real life right now, you think you've forgotten. Yeah.
And then you see a photo and you actually connect with that. It's, I don't know, that's like supernatural feeling.

Speaker 1 I know. There's something I've actually been working on with my grandma too.

Speaker 1 And there's a couple of different companies that do this, but I think it'd be really important to like also write your story down.

Speaker 1 There's like journals that'll prompt you with questions that you don't know that you would even think about, but she'll want to know both. She'll want to know your time together.

Speaker 1 She'll want to know your story, how you met her mom, what dating was like, everything. Like, just try to do as much as you're able to.

Speaker 1 I get, you know, you're dealing with a lot and everything like that.

Speaker 2 But, and also, make sure to do things that you really want to do. Oh, my God.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 2 If you want to be a part of a flash mob, go do that. Like, I think it's like maybe a really

Speaker 1 the bucket list of it all. Yeah.
The bucket list. I went skydiving.

Speaker 1 That song.

Speaker 1 That song's song's a good one.

Speaker 1 But I did just try to message OP and account has been suspended.

Speaker 2 How long ago was this posted?

Speaker 1 This was only posted 18 days ago.

Speaker 2 Why was the account suspended?

Speaker 1 I have no

Speaker 1 further explanation,

Speaker 1 except Reddit has suspended this account. I don't understand how Reddit works.

Speaker 2 I'm sorry. I don't get it.

Speaker 1 So, OP, if you're out there listening, please send Justin a DM on Instagram. He sees his DMs actually.

Speaker 1 I would love to make sure you can get a VR camera or one of these journals or something that you find meaningful. So please send us a message.
But thank you all so, so, so much for being here.

Speaker 1 Another episode, another week. Please, please, please go to the comments and share any thoughts you have for these writers, especially our last one.

Speaker 1 I will be sure to include all the links in the description. But as you know, account for the last one has been suspended.
so

Speaker 1 i'm sure they'll they'll be watching and looking and

Speaker 1 support like this when the community comes together behind you like we've seen it again in story after story like these ops do appreciate it they do feel it so yeah i know you guys will will come through on this one and i would just say i want to thank you guys too because it's

Speaker 2 It's so beautiful that there is a community here that and that's you guys like you guys created this this safe place for somebody to come and express their biggest fears and look for support.

Speaker 2 And you guys show up for them. So thank you guys for being amazing.
It's

Speaker 2 truly incredible.

Speaker 1 We have a really

Speaker 1 special community here. Really special.

Speaker 3 Yes, you guys are the best. Thank you.

Speaker 1 On that note, until next time.

Speaker 3 Until next time.

Speaker 1 Until next time. Bye, guys.