Megan Mullally and Nick Offerman

This episode of Where Everybody Knows Your Name with Ted Danson and Woody Harrelson sometimes is brought to you by Almond Joy.

With its perfect blend of real, creamy coconut, rich chocolate-y taste, and a satisfying almond crunch, Almond Joy is the taste that simply takes you away.

Blissful, tropical flavors will have you feeling sunny vibes and ocean breezes in every bite.

Almond Joy is the ticket to a sweet, indulgent, laid-back escape.

One you'll want to return to again and again.

Grab the creamy coconut and chocolatey crunch of Almond Joy today

and taste paradise.

Summer of 69, no apostrophe.

Welcome back to Everybody Knows Your Name with me, Ted Danson, and Woody Harrelson Sometimes.

Today, Woody and I are welcoming our first couple to the podcast, Megan Malally and Nick Offerman.

Actually, they're more like a comedy and acting power couple, which is obvious if you saw them on parks and recreation as Ron and Tammy.

Woody and I have separately crossed paths with Nick and Megan over the years.

Woody did a spell on Will and Grace back in the early 2000s.

Mary and I have known them for several years.

And I got to work with Nick on Fargo and Hearts Beat Loud.

I'm very excited for you all to get to know them.

So here they are, Nick Offerman and Megan Malally.

Megan Malally, Nick Offerman.

That's who we're sitting here talking to in case you didn't catch on.

There's going to to be some kind of intro that we'll put in after the fact, dude.

They know

telling him anything new right now.

They know

you're told to.

I'm just trying to be a good boy.

Oh, get a shot.

You're right.

Now you'll know for sure.

Nick, say.

Good afternoon.

The signature.

Now we know who we're talking to.

Yeah, let's get back to them.

So you guys met on Berlin Circle.

Yes,

in the year 2000, ironically.

Yeah, and

so I was between the second and third seasons of Will and Grace during the hiatus.

And Nick was

so, and I knew this guy who was the producer, and he was like, what are you doing?

Do you want to read this script?

Do you want to do this thing?

So I thought, oh yeah, that seems fun.

It's like an equity waiver play that we did called the Berlin Circle.

And Nick was living in someone's unfinished basement with no floor.

and he would just like in the night if he had to pee you'd just go over in the corner and like pee

okay you had to train that out of him though right i mean

he still does it one advantage of the dirt floor

by morning it's gone it's undetectable in our bedroom now we just in one little corner it's just dirt so he can

that's good you put that dirt in there he wasn't able to shake it but i just want to get into the how did you guys i mean how did that all just develop?

I know, it's funny because on paper, it doesn't seem like it would have happened.

Because, why do you say that?

Well, he was driving

out.

Is that what you were doing?

Maroon.

Convertible.

What kind of car was it?

Chevy Cavalier.

Chevy Cavalier.

Like, what year was it?

It was 91.

Okay.

And one of the good years.

And he was wearing like gold overalls that were his notepad so he anything he had to remember he'd just write it on his overalls the first time we went out to dinner he tucked his napkin into the bib of said overalls um

so like i'm saying on paper but you know he did he came up and introduced himself to me on the first day when we did the tape the we did a read reading of the script and he was like the only person because i think the other people thought like oh she's like on tv we're just gonna

we're going to ignore her before she ignores us, you know?

And he came up and introduced himself.

And so I was like, okay, but he, I don't know, my, my previous type had been quite different from Nick, like very like,

like

skinny, androgynous, like rock drummers.

And so

I'm surprised we didn't hook up.

Yes.

You are very much my type.

Yeah, yeah.

I mean, doesn't that just go for most women uh within a three-state radius of you yeah i'm surprised yeah ted's every woman's type i mean for sure yeah yeah so who who in that moment of meeting um

sparks flew for whom first

you're looking at him

well that's the way it has to be or should be nick speak for yourself sure yeah

it's it's i hate to uh belittle it as to be as conventional as because because i felt like we were on such different echelons.

Like

there's no way Megan should have done this play.

She was about to win her first Emmy that fall.

Will and Grace, so she had become this, you know, world

comedy champion.

And she did a play for free with strangers because she thought it would be fun, which just doesn't make sense.

That's not simply not done.

And so,

and so to to meet her uh it's there i guess there were levels of sparks because at first i i just was like oh you're really funny though we had done our first read-through and i was like oh shit you're a genius and then i introduced myself and was like oh this is going to be fun and she then was like real with me and was and and we just were friendly and cordial i was like oh you're like a real person but you're also like a mel brooks movie uh

and so I was fascinated and it was all kind of magical.

And I had to get through a few different levels, I think, before I was like, oh, I'm getting a boner.

Also, this is, oh, you're a human woman.

I knew you were getting a boner before you knew you were getting a boner.

You still do.

As you are, yeah.

We haven't even gone to the first commercial yet.

No.

Oh, God.

Do we do commercials?

I guess we do, don't we?

This one will have to be.

We're talking about erectile dysfunction.

Hey, hey, look.

No, I told you that in private.

Less me.

All right.

So then who made the first move?

Keep going.

I mean,

come on.

Yeah.

So, I mean, we began

the ways, as I'm sure you guys are aware, that sort of backstage or off-screen friendship.

when you are with like-minded performers and you have time on your hands.

And in the theater, I think it's, for me, it's a lot more like when you're in church and

you are giggling with your friend or your cousin because somebody farted in the middle of church.

It's that sensibility.

So

whispering filthy things to each other by way of making friends before we're about to enter a scene on stage is a great bonding category.

And so we were doing that.

And

it really, I mean, it took me by surprise because

I had a class problem.

I was a broke, you know, actor living in a basement, drinking too much bourbon.

And so it took me a while to swallow the idea that there could be chemistry, that I was like, oh, she is treating me like I'm legitimate.

And I was terrified.

I had the worst butterflies,

but it was clearly heating.

The brew, the goulash was warming up.

And

one day after rehearsal, she was pulling out in a gorgeous Range Rover.

And even that was like a flying saucer to me.

And

I went over and opened the passenger door as she was about to pull into the street and got in

to simply, to say to her,

this is, I'm not crazy, right?

There's something here, right?

And she said, I don't know what you think is happening, but you can get right back out of this vehicle.

And

I said, well, hear me out.

And

so, I mean, I think that was kind of the first official overview.

That seems like about the worst thing you could hear.

I don't know what you think is happening, but you can get out of this vehicle.

Yeah.

It's

you can get out of my Range Rover, to be cool.

Oh, well, that makes sense.

Yeah, get out of the Range Rover.

Yeah, no, I mean, I had started thinking he was funny.

And the other thing that

dawns on me is that I had only done these two

seasons of Will and Grace, and any kind of success or any kind of like having a Range Rover was very new to me.

And so I was sort of still in a mindset of like doing a play for $7 a week.

And talking to the pets.

Yeah, talking to the, yeah.

And so that's why I think it never really occurred to me that that he it's just it's just that when you look back on it it's funny like it seems like there would have been this huge divide but there really wasn't and I had started thinking he was funny no and I yeah and I had started thinking he was funny and that was the attraction and and then

yeah so I think that's how it all evolved and I think my saying um get out of the Range Rover was more about not wanting to rush into something, especially since we were doing this play together and

yeah, wanting to take it really slowly.

It should be noted that I did not, in fact, get out of the range.

You did.

I mean, I did, but we were cord.

You know, you, you, you basically intimated, yes, maybe something is going on here.

Now get the fuck out of my range room.

Yeah.

That'll do.

No, that'll do.

You got out with a spring and exactly.

I was in for the long haul.

Yeah, no, I wasn't being brutal.

I was just being cautious.

Coy.

Coy.

Yeah.

The rules.

No, not that.

That's dumb.

Wasn't that a book, The Rules?

I didn't read it.

I don't know.

Let me back up just one second because when I first met you guys, it was like, oh, they're actors.

Saw you and Will and Grace.

She's an actor.

I got it.

I'm an actor.

Yeah, we're on the same thing here.

And when I met you on Fargo, it was the same thing.

Oh, I got it.

He's an actor.

Really good.

You're both really good, but I'm like you.

And then I see you, Megan, do, what was it, Megan?

No, Nancy and Beth.

And I have never, which was

song, dance,

but to say that brings it down a notch because it was the most extraordinarily creative thing I have ever seen.

It was just mind-boggling.

And so it was like, oh, shoot.

All right.

She's an actor.

No, she's like this genius, talent, dancing singing and knocked me for a loop then i find out nick that you you have your own woodworking shop and you build you know your own canoes you build tables for you have a for real going business of being a woodman a woodworker and you write the most incredible books you are a humorist it's like y'all left me in the dust so i almost don't know how to begin asking you questions but you are truly a remarkably creative, creative couple.

Thank you, Ted.

Yeah, I have this band called Nancy and Beth.

Nancy.com.

Nancy A.N.D.

Beth.com, if you'd like to check it out.

My manager.

And

it's being reinvented right now because

for a variety of reasons.

But yeah, it's going to be.

Better than ever.

We have a record that's going to come out next year.

And thank you, though.

It's a band where we do all covers and I choreograph it, choreograph every song.

And

yeah, it's a little bit, I think it's a little bit, I think it's a little avant-garde, but it very like crowd pleaser at the same time.

What were you going to say?

Oh, man, I can't wait to see this.

But

because you did the, you, you really started in ballet like when you were a kid and and you and like i didn't know anything about that like then you were in oklahoma city ballet and then you and then you went into the

what was the one in New York New York City ballet yeah I went School of American Ballet which is a New York City Ballet School I studied there yeah so you were really thinking I'm going I'm gonna be a ballerina that was your focus that was what I was gonna do until I realized it was too motherfucking hard it's like my toenails were falling off and I was like no thank you this is too much so I decided that I liked this sort of acting, like the couple of ballets that I had the lead in, what I really liked was the acting part of it.

But my main, I, you know, my main thing always,

even more than that, was I loved to sing.

So that was sort of my first love was just music, anything involving music.

Yeah.

How would you describe Nancy and Beth, the movement?

Because when you say you do, you sing and you dance, but it's not just dance.

I mean, it's like this amazing movement to the music.

So it is dance, but how would you describe it?

Well,

I think it's just very like

it's, I try to like take each song and create like a little world for it.

So the movement styles are a little bit different from song to song.

And of course, you know, I'm too old to do, you know, anything crazy dance-wise, but

I feel like you can really do so much without like doing anything crazy, like anything too aerobic or anything like involving a lot of like jumping.

So, I feel like I would just like listen to each song and get in front of a mirror.

And we have one little room in our house that has one little wall of mirrors.

So, I was like, listen to the song, listen to the song, and just let it kind of come out.

So, I want to express the lyrics in a way that's either kind of,

you know, and/or funny

or moving or

thought-provoking, or

kind of like reinvent the movement to go with each song.

And like, using, we would do a lot of, I do a lot of choreography using,

using a chair where we were like sit on a chair, lay on a chair, do a lot of crazy things with

that.

We, we had one song that was like more of an old-fashioned, like a hat and cane kind of

song um so it's just a big variety of just depending on the song that the the key to the band for me is picking the right songs and then coming up with how to interpret them through

you know singing and movement right

well if you're gonna do the chair song you gotta do a feet the same mine head

was a fine effect that's my favorite i love cabaret i love cabaret, yeah.

100%.

And her stuff would fit very well.

It's of a piece with the cabaret.

Because each, I was going to say, you make each song like a piece of theater.

Thank you.

Yes, thanks.

That's a good way to say it.

I'm trying to create a little world.

Each song is its own little world.

Yeah.

Don't you just love summer?

Something about the longer days and warmer nights just makes you feel your best.

So what better time to create healthy meal habits that last with Green Chef, the number one meal kit for clean eating?

All right, last time I talked to you about Green Chef, my wife Mary had just made Moroccan spice shrimp.

And besides being delicious, it was also, according to her, very creative experience.

It was still the fun of, you know, inventing and cooking on your stove, but also with the ease of having everything provided to you.

Make this summer your healthiest yet with Green Chef.

Head to greenchef.com slash 50 Ted and Woody and use code 50 Ted and Woody to get 50% off your first month, then 20% off for two months with free shipping.

That's code 50 Tedandwoody at greenschef.com slash 50 TED and Woody.

Where everybody knows your name with Ted Danson and Woody Harrelson sometimes is brought to you by Progressive Insurance.

Do you ever find yourself playing the budgeting game?

Well, with the Name Your Price tool from Progressive, you can find options that fit your budget and potentially lower your bills.

Try it at Progressive.com, Progressive Casualty Insurance Company and Affiliates.

Price and coverage match limited by state law.

Not available in all states.

Your home should show off who you are, telling your story in every detail, meeting you where you are.

Ashley has styles that balance timeless appeal and modern trends to bring your personal look home.

Pairing eye-catching design with features like stain-resistant performance fabric, Ashley offers well-crafted, affordable pieces built to stand up to real life.

Plus, they provide fast, reliable white glove delivery right to your door.

Visit your local Ashley store or head to Ashley.com to find your style.

Now, will you be able to go with Megan?

Because I know you sometimes join up and do stuff together.

Yeah, whenever possible.

I mean, we have a lot of fun where I step into the dad role and I drive the tour truck.

So I'll be her driver.

You know, when we've been on tour before, we've done like longer tours that were more like...

you know, six weeks or seven weeks.

He, um, he'll come out, you know, at a certain point, you had got to to introduce the band, right?

It's a great band, like five other, you know, so seven people total.

And he'll come out and introduce the band.

And of course, people go wild.

They love it.

And he does like really funny intros for everybody.

It's really great.

Yeah.

Well, I mean, I need to earn my keep.

Now, one thing I haven't seen, and I wanted to check out Biden, it's you guys also do a song and dance

thing together, don't you?

That's separate from what you're talking about.

Well, yeah, I I mean we've we toured we did a tour where we kind of combined our chocolate and peanut butter.

What was the name of the tour?

The name of the tour was

summer.

Summer of 69, no apostrophe.

It's every summer in our house.

Yeah, or just summer at our house.

When we got married in 2003,

I don't know why.

I was like,

we had a little small wedding in our backyard it was only 20 people total but but then we were gonna have a reception which never happened and invite everybody and I was like I got it into my head that I wanted to do to choreograph Nick and I doing Carly Simon nobody does it better

And so then I did for the tour.

So it was pretty involved.

Nick tours meniscus at one point.

But we were doing like

lifts and

running around in a circle doing granchettes.

I mean, it was pretty crazy.

Yeah.

It was really fun.

Is that a one-off or do you think you'll do that again?

You have to talk to the boss.

Yeah, I want to do it.

I wanted to do like, I wanted to have like a big party and I wanted to do like a flash mob where we'd get like other people like to dance and we'd just play it and then we'd have like Nick and I would start and and then like 15 other people would join in.

Yeah, we like to have fun.

And I wanted to say thank you for complimenting my other work earlier.

And the answer to that is

when you're not

the lead of a TV series or film, you have a lot of time on your hands to build canoes and write books.

So

you two

will never become great boat builders.

That's funny.

I just admire it.

I know.

You know, I started recently, like for Christmas, I gave my family and friends, I would give them either, I made spoons and I made chopsticks.

Now, this is obviously small potatoes for you.

It involved a lot of sanding for me.

It's huge.

To take a stick and turn it into something that will carry soup is a superpower.

Thank you.

It's fantastic.

Yeah, I thought you might demean and instead I feel lifted up.

So thank you.

That's not my bag.

But I was also going to say that Nick, so when we met, we met in 2000 and then he was working as an actor, but it was pretty sporadic and he didn't get Parks and Rec till 2009.

So rather than just like laying around the house, he got this space and he created a wood shop and he started like making furniture all the time and then hiring people to work there and

I mean

big time this is not me in my garage whittling or trying to make sure he has how many people are working in your shop right now four now yeah but it has been as many as how many

six or seven yeah

and you're you're filling orders not just for friends or for your own canoe right right yeah so what are you what is it you make i know i've seen some of your tables you know zach alphanacus has a beautiful dining room table that you made we call that Zeus's wagon wheel.

It's just like a lazy Susan, right?

As a well.

It's pretty astonishing.

You could park a Hummer on that thing because he's very green, and he took this warehouse in Venice, and

they were going to turn it into a living space, but he wanted to reuse all of the materials they pulled out, which included these gigantic laminate.

laminated wooden beams.

And he said, can you make us a dining table out of these giant beams?

And we said, sure.

It'll weigh three tons.

Like, you'll need a forklift to move it around.

But so we, I mean, so we make bespoke pieces, custom pieces, but then also

we work with a great program called Woodworks downtown that teaches people living with homelessness.

We teach them woodworking skills so they can then get a job reference and help them get back on their feet.

So that's great.

So with that program,

we make cutting boards and coasters, things that are simpler, but they're also more affordable.

So if fans want to get something, you know, our tables are stupidly expensive.

If you need any guidance on chopsticks, let me know.

I will.

We'll maybe work a

joint venture.

Yeah, we'll do like a seminar, a workshop.

Have you been able to track whether or not any of the kids that came into the workshop, it actually was a springboard for them into something else.

Do you know what I mean?

I mean, yeah, our main,

the most badass woman in my shop right now is named Diane, and she had a life of misfortune and just a lot of abuse and found her way into this program.

And now she's our, she desperately wanted to learn woodworking.

She loves it.

And now she's like the leader.

She's our number one woodworker.

That's kind of like what i did with nick

it is

shape him form him

megan rescued me rehabilitated 2000

she she got me my shots uh

got him some gave you a bath

took me to j crew and bought me a bunch of sweaters and here we are

this has been a great day this morning we uh we were with jimmy burrows oh nice

Yeah.

Yeah.

You worked with him for a lot.

How many did he do?

He did the whole episode.

246 episodes.

He did every episode of Will and Grace.

He didn't miss one.

11 seasons.

Six more than he did on cheers.

Oh, fuck them.

Yeah, I know.

Yeah.

We should have known that before we did the interviews.

We were all over them.

We love you, Jimmy.

We love you.

Yeah, we love you.

And now

is he one of your favorite directors?

Yep, absolutely.

He's the best.

And he gave me total freedom.

Like, the thing about Jimmy is, I don't think he ever said to me, don't do that.

He only said, do it, do that, but do it more.

Yeah.

He said, do that.

And then what else can you add on to that?

But you never said, don't.

You did something I've never seen, which is, you know, when I watched the pilot, you speak differently than you started in the next episode.

Yeah, I think it was.

I think we talked about this back then.

I think so, yeah.

What was the tell me how you saw the pilot and you had a revelation?

No, it hadn't aired yet.

I think what happened was when I auditioned for it,

I had always gone into auditions, kind of like the acting version of that band Nancy and Beth that you were talking about, where I would come in with something so crazy that I knew in my heart was amazing and they knew in their hearts was definitely not what they wanted.

So I thought, I think when I auditioned for Will and Grace, I thought, okay, I'll just like kind of,

the pilot was written.

It wasn't, I don't know, in my opinion, it wasn't a very interesting, it was kind of like, I'd seen it before kind of sidekick thing.

And

just my opinion.

And so.

When I went in, I thought, okay, well, I'll just do it the way it's written.

And then I got the part.

And then as it was going along, I was like, i'm just gonna start like juzhing this up a little bit episode by episode and i think by episode 10 it was kind of there like i'd sort of like gotten it more or less where i wanted it and then yeah so i think it was like a subtle thing where i don't know if they necessarily it were no it's a spring start incremental if you look at the first episode from

it is crazy

yeah

which i just was like oh my god i didn't even know you could do that.

But it just

can't argue with the result.

Yeah, in the pilot, I felt very eggy, which is the term in showbiz, right?

You know, eggy, where you feel like you've got egg on your face.

And I felt it was very eggy.

And then as it went along, I was like, okay, yeah.

This egg is good egg.

Yeah.

Yeah.

So it became that.

And then they

really like jumped on board, they being the writers, and they started like writing to it and then they would then they would come in with something I hadn't thought of and then I would I would play to that and then they would we always started building on each other's uh on the you know the writing and the acting and it all started coming together really well.

Yeah,

that was a huge show.

I mean politically in every way.

Yeah, it was it was groundbreaking in a lot of ways.

And

yeah, and and and as for Jimmy, like I really

I really love him for giving me the leeway to do what I needed to do.

And then I feel like sometimes in other things since then, when directors try to give me a lot of, like, they try to like,

like, if I have an idea that I think will be good and they're, and they, and it's very early on and they're like, no, oh, what are you doing?

Like, no, I see it this way.

I'm always like, where's Jimmy?

Where's Jimmy?

And I, I just did a movie

that Larry Charles directed, and he was amazing also in that same way of like, go, you know, do it.

So I love that.

Yeah.

I think some writers, if they didn't write it,

it's very hard to pitch them another idea because no, that's

not my idea.

Yeah.

Oh, right.

And, you know, back in from our day, it was all like you had, there was no way that anybody would ever have improvised anything.

And it's so different now.

Like everybody improvises and people want it.

Yeah, which has good and bad results.

Because sometimes you'll go along with a movie and you'll go, that's a good story.

Oh, there they go.

Yeah.

You know,

a little fancy turn.

That kind of takes out the story.

It's rough when you're like.

doing scenes or whatever.

And there's one person who really can't improvise, right?

Or maybe more than one, but often there'll be one person, but then they never stop throwing in new bad lines.

Right.

You know, they just keep, and it's like, how do you, how do we continue?

You know, anyway, they call me improviser killer.

I will improvise with you and I'll be having fun.

It'll be great.

And then

I get scared, like someone's chasing me and I freeze and scream and I do scream.

Yeah.

And that's usually the end of the improv.

I mean, I'm fun to have around.

It's good to have limits.

Yeah.

Let me let me talk to you for a second because we share a director, writer, creator, Mike Shur.

That's right.

Yeah, Parks and Wreck.

How did, was that the first kind of big leap for you acting-wise?

Yeah.

I mean,

I was very happy.

I was Mr.

Malally.

I had a wood shop and I was working regularly at guest star jobs and Sundance movies.

And we were big fans of The Office, The American Office.

And I have known Rain Wilson a long time.

And I said to Megan,

I feel like if I'm ever going to make it, if I'm going to break out, it's going to be on a show like The Office in a role like Dwight Schroot.

And then I auditioned for Mike

for a part on The Office, and I couldn't do it.

So he ended up, when he then then created Parks and Wreck, he remembered me and wanted to put me on it.

And so that's exactly what happened: was, you know,

if Ron Swanson was like any other character, it was similar to the Dwight Schroed paradigm.

And so from the get-go, he, you know, it's, it's just that thing where he saw me, he saw

he saw through

the facial hair to a spark of charisma where he's like,

I think I can turn you into something palatable to an audience.

And by God, he did.

Oh, that was a great, great, great character.

He said, if you just say these words in the right order,

by God, they'll laugh.

And he's this wonderful, great-hearted guy.

Mike Shur, you're talking about it.

Mike Shur, yeah.

I think my second book had dedicated to him him and said, thank you for showing me how funny we can be while saying I love you.

Because

that's kind of his thing.

It is.

He's a

highly intelligent guy, came through the Harvard comedy pipeline.

Right.

You know, following our show's other creator,

Greg Daniels, who was Harvard roommates with Conan.

and who, you know,

under whose auspices we,

I'm drinking his water right now, in fact.

Yeah, you are.

This is Conan's water.

It's good.

It is good.

It's good.

It's clean.

Yeah.

It's from Iceland.

But I mean, so he's in, I love these people that are, that go to, you know, Ivy League schools and could become like captains of industry.

But they say, you know, what would be really fun?

What if we make people laugh?

Yeah, what if we tell stories and they're medicinal?

Yeah.

And Mike is one of the greatest examples of that.

I mean,

your show is a show about morality.

Yeah.

Who knew?

It's taught.

The Good Place is taught in some universities as part of their ethics.

Literally.

Notre Dame had a, I don't know if it's still going on, but they taught,

we had on, we had on SpeedDial, we had like three or four ethics professors who would talk to the writers daily to make sure what we were talking about was right.

Was ethical?

Yeah, it was ethical.

It wasn't.

Sometimes it's good to get a second, third opinion.

Every place I go, if there's an ocean, I love to jump into it.

So I'm very excited to talk to you about St.

Pete Clearwater on Florida Gulf Coast, near Tampa.

It has 35 miles of beautiful white sand beaches and crystal clear turquoise water.

The sand is as soft as powder, and the Gulf waters are warm and calm, perfect for wading, swimming, and floating without a care.

There are plenty of creature comforts there like stylish resorts and top restaurants, but this is a place.

that values Mother Nature too.

You might spot wild dolphins or manatees any time of year at the beach or in quiet bay waters.

You can even kayak inside mysterious mangrove tunnels and see herons, crabs, and fish.

If you're dreaming of an amazing beach getaway, St.

Pete Clearwater, Florida is the place.

Head to visit spc.com to start planning your trip today.

Cooler temps are rolling in, and as always, Quince is where you should be turning for fall staples that actually last.

This I can vouch for.

I have that Mongolian cashmere sweater, zip-up gray, I love.

I use it all the time, especially in the cool weather.

I have a black cap that I'm just starting to wear.

I have linen black pants that I wore all summer.

So this is a really genuinely good product.

And it does blow your mind how inexpensive it is compared to what you think it will be.

Anyway, my closet is starting to build up with Quince.

Keep it classic and cozy this fall with long-lasting staples from Quince.

Go to quince.com/slash Ted and Woody for free shipping on your order and 365-day returns.

That's q-u-in-ce-e dot com/slash TED and Woody.

Free shipping and 365-day returns.

Quince.com slash Ted and Woody.

But now,

I hadn't seen this, but there's

a clip of your relationship, you and Megan's.

I don't

fill us all in on the relationship, but it was the funniest, hottest.

Oh, right.

Or was this when you guys toured together?

No, no, this is on the show on Parks and Wreck.

You came in as

his

ex-wife, Tammy too.

His second ex-wife, yeah.

All of his wives were named Tammy.

But it was violent.

It was passionate.

It was.

Yeah.

So

that first episode was so fun that we shot that the first Tammy episode.

The very first scene that we shot was like, oh, so early.

It was like 6.30 in the morning.

And we were shooting in Burbank, some location.

It was a motel.

And we were supposed to be like desperately trying to get to this motel so that we could like get it on and um

and so we're in this crazy car supposed to be ron swanson's car whatever it was nick was driving and i was in the passenger seat and i was like

i'm gonna take my bra off so i took my bra off and then they were like and this is and then they were like action camera yeah this is off camera i took my bra off and i had it and they were like action so he like screeches into this parking lot and I like throw my bra out the window of the car we get out of the car slam the doors run in and I pulled my sweater off

and they had to put like a circle like a dark circle to block out my boob

And we ran into the motel and then like this guy comes over and he's like, hi, I'm the director.

Like I hadn't met anybody yet.

He like introduced himself.

Who was it?

Troy Miller.

Troy Miller.

It's like, hi, I'm Troy.

I'm the director.

I was like, nice.

Great first take.

And they used it, right?

And then that same day, we went to a diner

and

we, they, at a certain point, were like, just do whatever you need to do.

And so we were like wildly like making out on the table and

throwing things.

So they had, you know, atmosphere people as customers throwing food at people.

We asked them first if we could do it.

And then Nick at one point was so like, Ron Swanson is so like riled up on testosterone that Nick actually pulled the, we were in a booth

at this diner.

He pulled the

table out of the wall.

The real table.

He pulled it out of the wall.

It was some of the best.

Have you seen that kind of compilation of your relationship?

Yeah.

It's amazing.

It really is.

I mean, Megan, when when megan when they came up with the idea and megan agreed to do it she took me out in the backyard for kissing practice like violent

disgusting like kissing a safer we had to come up with like new ways to kiss the witch

or put newspaper down in the house that's right to get out of that

the dirt the dirt area wasn't big enough in the bedroom

uh mike scully wrote that episode and he he sadly had an acrimonious divorce, but he then

openly said, But here,

it's all in this script.

This is you, Darling.

It's a really funny script.

Wow.

So, did that, did, did, when did Parks and Reich kind of open up more leading man film feature stuff?

Um, I mean, you know,

when the show kind of caught on in a couple, first couple of years, um,

you know, it was just one of those things where it changed where uh a certain much larger audience was like oh that guy with the mustache uh but it's interesting because i um i don't know i i still feel like i'm kind of an underground

uh

property you know i don't i didn't become uh you know you know steve corell or something

but but shows like fargo like noah hawley got a hold of me and said yeah how would you like to do something which is how we met yeah And so I've been really grateful for the way it went because that show was a blast.

It was very well received.

And then it became even exponentially more popular

in the time of streaming.

So young people now don't realize that it actually was never a hit.

It was critically well received.

But only then later it became like a comfort show.

Is that right?

That's crazy, right?

Yeah.

We had no idea.

We were not,

like, we didn't get awards.

We didn't, in fact, we were almost canceled every year.

It was always a question mark.

That's right.

I remember hearing that.

How many seasons?

Seven seasons.

Yeah.

So we had a great run.

And I'm very grateful, but I'm also glad that

the world still allows me to do other roles.

Yeah.

Forgive me.

I'm forgetting the name of the movie that you so graciously asked me to do with you.

Hearts Beat Loud.

Hearts Beat Loud.

I was so impressed with you.

It was like, because you, you do, and the work before this comes across as a character actor, you know, and I think this was your first full-on

romantic lead.

Sure.

And

you just hit it out of the park.

You were

so good.

Such a good movie.

Yeah, really lovely.

Thank you.

Brett Haley made that film.

And Kiercey Clements, who plays my daughter, kind of steals the movie.

We have a band together and she sings.

And it was so,

you and I had become friendly, but not good buddies.

And so it was a little bit of a flyer where I called you out of the blue and asked you if you would come to Brooklyn and do like three scenes as my buddy.

And you agreed to do it without reading the script, which is incredibly generous.

Or just smart.

You said you named the amount of marijuana you required.

Yeah.

I called Woody first and he said, this is what is okay to have.

Come on down to the woods, 8271 Santa Monica Boulevard.

Anyway,

you were magnificent in that.

And

I,

yeah, I felt like our relationship

was cemented forever.

It was so fun.

It was so fun to have you, to have you play my bartender.

Yeah.

As

everyone can attest.

So funny, whenever I'm asked to get behind a bar, whether it's charity or in your film, scares the crap out of me.

I start to sweat.

I feel just, you know.

Sure.

I don't know why, but anyway, PTSD from cheers, something.

Well, we all wondered, you know, do I still have it?

Yeah, I think that's it.

Can I still shake it?

Can I still cut a lemon or something?

What's in it?

Run cook.

What the hell?

I got one for you.

Your books.

When did you know you could be, you know, your writing is,

you really are a humorist, and your writing is so wonderfully worded.

It's not everyday language.

It's an elevated language.

And you're talking about, and the last one I read, about,

you know, the environment, about our parks and about beauty and being out in the wilderness.

But you write like, you know, you're, you're a buddy of Thoreau.

You know, it's, it's amazing.

When did you know you had that ability?

Thank you.

I really appreciate that.

I don't know.

When I was in high school, I wrote one paper

for my senior like final in English class where the teacher taped a poem on the

board, and you had like three hours to write an essay.

He said, You know,

here's your subject matter.

You got three hours, go.

And

it with a piece of masking tape.

And so I made up a history of masking tape that was very smart ass.

But I just, I just had this idea where, and he

was in, and I was a, I was a good student, but not, but not exemplary.

and and my teacher uh

like read it to the school he was like we have an original voice here and he thought it was he thought it was brilliant and funny do you have it I don't

I should so how when that was happening you must have been so psyched I was really stoked because because I come from a small farm town very conservative and so it was me sort of taking a Megan Malally swing of like I want to do something weird here.

I'm going to take a chance.

And, but I'd never aspired to writing books.

Only later I had the opportunity and I said, well, I think I could take a swing at this.

I love Bill Bryson and Garrison Keillor.

Right.

And of course, Mark Twain.

But like,

I was like, I think my family's funny and they're bucolic and folksy.

And so.

And not in an attempt to take credit for your writing career, but I always thought, thinly veiled attempt.

I always thought that you, even just your emails and stuff, I'd be like, honey, this is so good.

Like, if I had anything important that I needed to write in an email back in the day, I'd be like, could you write it?

You're an email.

This is just a nagging job.

Even before email, I used to always leave.

I'd get up early to go to the shop and I'd leave a post-it for Megan.

And I'd come home and she'd be like, this post-it, this really cute.

And I, and listen, I saved every single one.

I have everything he's ever written on paper saved.

Oh, my God.

I love it.

Every single one.

So much.

Every note, every card, every post-it.

It almost has a language of your.

You know, it's like, not of this moment.

I know.

Sad.

It freaks me out.

I appreciate it.

And

it's something that

I don't take for granted to have the opportunity to have a readership and try to like, in whatever I'm trying to learn about,

I try to do that with my audience.

And I'm very grateful I get to do it because it also keeps me curious.

It keeps me young because I'm still trying to learn.

I'm very interested in.

people making things with their hands like spoons,

but also people knowing where their food comes from and getting back in touch with farming and understanding farming and forestry and so you know to to remain in that conversation helps us live better yeah

helps us all keep an eye on citizenship did you see Woody what is the movie you did the kiss the

kiss the ground did you see what do you think of regenerative agriculture i love it i own some cows in england like it's it's something that I'm a big cheerleader of.

And

they're just in a warehouse, or they're out on the field, or how's that work?

They are in a herd.

A friend of mine is a shepherd, and so

he's a popular nature writer and regenerative

supporter.

Oh, great.

And so it's very grass-fed.

James.

King Charles?

No.

Prince.

He is, though.

His name's Prince.

King Charles is like the biggest regenerative

poetry guy, I think, in the world.

He is.

No, it's,

and

their government

does a much better job than ours does.

Wait, get James' name out there.

Oh, James Rebanks is my friend.

He's a great, and he has great books called The Shepherd's Life.

Beautiful farm up in northern England, near Scotland.

Beautiful.

Oh, wow.

Yeah, and in Kentucky, my favorite writer, Wendell Berry, is

a great agrarian.

So my last book was inspired by a conversation with Wendell just about that, about we no longer know where our food comes from, and that allows

corporations.

From the store, honey.

Exactly.

And so people take advantage of that and they sell us food that's not that good for anybody.

Franken food.

That's right.

Woody, well,

Woody's boy on the same page with you on that.

Yeah,

I really, I would like to see it all shift.

You know, the

corporate agriculture has just become so

it's disgusting.

And I, and

especially the pesticides.

And, you know, I don't understand how the pesticides are still absolutely A-ok.

You know, like,

just massive, massive amount of pesticides put on our food.

It's like, you don't think that this basically, there's a nerve gas gets into you, you know?

And in some states, I think that you can't get a bank loan without

Monsanto.

You have to have Monsanto seeds, and you have to obviously use the pesticides that go with those seeds,

fertilizers and stuff.

But before we get too depressed,

let's have a hamburger.

No, sorry, sorry go on

anyway i i just uh i it's amazing because you're you're both of you are so

original at what you do like you're you know to be so it's it to have a couple here but both of them are extraordinary usually it's one you know let's face it one's amazing and a couple and the other person is kind of there just kind of there for you know ballast or whatever.

There should be a projection of Mary Steenberg and

her ballast.

This is my friend.

That's a bottom-heavy ticket.

For sure.

Now, what about you guys?

So, you were raised Catholic and you were raised Episcopalian?

Well, I went to Episcopalian school, but

my mother was Catholic.

Yeah.

And I mean, we both, I think early on, when I was, when I was nine, we were, I got in the car after Sunday school and I informed my mother that I wouldn't be returning

or to church.

And she had two nuns in full, this is back when they wore the full like black habits come over and sit in our living room and like, I guess, like bless me so that I'd be good to go for life.

And they gave me a little round, a little oval thing of the Virgin Mary that I still have

and it had a little teeny like 16th of an inch square wrapped in like for tin foil in it and it was supposed to be a piece of the shroud of turin

i was like you guys are hooked up

like these two nuns from some place in oklahoma city

got a hold of the shroud of turin yeah

I thought they were going to give you the old lecture.

You're going to go to hell if you don't.

They

set me up for life.

I'll say your mom said, come on in, do this.

Yeah, because she said, look, she's out.

What do I do?

And they were like, we've got this.

And they came over and like, it's kind of sweet.

I thought it was.

Yeah, it's like they put the spell on me.

It is worth it.

It's a good, that's a good

parenting style instead of saying, no, I'm going to fight your impulse.

I was really cool at my mom.

Yeah, she was cool.

And you, Mr.

Catholic?

My mom and dad are still very influential in our hometown Catholic Church.

All the kids pretty much quit going,

but

I think we all have great values.

Like, I think,

I don't know, for me, organized religion

is not as effective as Eastern religions.

Like I get a lot more churchy feeling out in the woods where I'm like, oh, shit,

this feels holy

as opposed to, you know, the drudgery.

At least in my upbringing, church was a drudgery.

I was like, man, you're talking about rapture and, you know, passionate feelings and faith.

And everyone's just kind of droning and can't wait to get to the football game.

So I've remained very spiritual.

And like,

my mom and dad just lead the most incredible lives of service.

And I think me and my three siblings

really aspire to them without needing to bring any religious text into it.

Right.

Well, it seems like

the whole Catholic thing.

Now, I don't want to be inappropriate here, but Catholic and Episcopalian, it seems like.

Couldn't they zhuzh it up a little?

I mean, could they make it more boring?

It's so

boring.

And then Catholic, you got all the stuff in Latin.

It's like

first of all, really, don't I?

Do you know Latin?

I didn't even know Latin.

Never mind.

I'm out.

Yeah,

it's true.

Some churches in the south, you'd go, yeah, now I want to be part of this.

Oh, yeah, they make it fun.

Episcopal, or rather, what is it?

Huh?

Baptist.

No, what's the one?

Yeah, Southern Baptist, but also even further, starts with the P.

Oh, Pentecostal.

Yeah.

You know, and they're shaking and speaking in tongues.

Now, that to me, you know, even if you don't believe it, it's good theater.

Yeah, we just lost the Midwest, but moving on.

Have the decency to have a rock band.

I'm not saying I don't believe.

Have the decency to have a rock band on the altar.

Get a rock band up there, Christian rock.

If the phone rings and you're

and you answered, are you hoping for a playwright to call you or a book deal or a TV or a film or a dance?

You know, you have so many outlets.

You don't seem like the type of people who wait for the phone to ring, though.

You're doing stuff.

You're making your own magic, right?

Yeah.

I mean, both of you, you're doing.

What's it matter if the phone rings?

Great if the phone rings, but like you're

doing your own thing.

Yeah.

Can I ask you about

a project that you found your mom's letters in a truck?

I was thinking about that when you when you said that a minute ago.

Um

so

I found

when my mom died, I found two giant barrels that they would ship

things in like China and like like big giant barrels that would come like three feet high and maybe like

two feet around

stuffed with letters

and they're all from the 30s and 40s primarily yeah 30s and 40s thousands of letters right okay so my mom saved all of her letters from the time she was and and her mom had saved all of her letters from the time she was like seven or eight years old like writing a letter to her grandparents or whatever okay so she has all everything she ever wrote all of my grandmother's letters that my grandmother ever wrote to her, all of my aunt's letters, et cetera,

including 732 love letters that were written to my mom.

Some of the guys, like there weren't like my mom wasn't like a big, you know, famous prostitute.

732 guys was it?

No, it was so some of the guys, so some of them, like say 300 of those are like wannabes, like also rans, right?

But then they were like the main guys that she like, she was engaged to a couple of people.

400 something guys were not the all-sorry.

So some of the guys, so say there were like 10 guys that she dated from the time she was like in high school until she met my father when she was 26, right?

So for 10 years, she dated maybe like

10 different guys.

Like she was in college and she was seeing like one or two guys like at the same time.

No one's going to judge.

She wasn't, I know, but they were all virgins.

So everybody was a virgin, right?

And it was so chaste.

And so some of the the guys wrote like 100 letters.

So that's how it

all added up.

Anyway, I wanted to, I want to, I'm getting ready to write something, to write a podcast where

I also have all of my dad's letters, but that's a whole other story.

I wanted to do a podcast where each episode is a different suitor of my mom's.

And

because I'm telling you, these letters are so heartbreaking.

These guys were so, I also have

photos of all of them, and they were so cute.

They all look like movie stars.

It's crazy.

My mom was

totally in love with your mom.

Totally in love.

My mom was the most beautiful girl in Tulsa, Oklahoma.

I mean, gorgeous.

She was a model for a while in New York.

But like, so she's a sweet person and so like the girl next door.

But anyway, I wanted to like focus on a different guy for each episode.

And

the letters are just heartbreaking.

they're so funny and sweet and insightful and then you know the the the joke is that she met my father who was hideous and for some reason that's the one she picked he was just heinous heinous person

so is that how you feel about pops yes

Not a good day.

No, he was a really bad alcoholic and he cheated on my mom constantly.

So he wasn't great.

But I mean

he had like moments where he was he was really funny so he had moments of being funny but no not good I felt my mom my poor mom was so nice

well this would be a kind of a wonderful honoring of your mom and her happy love life yeah that's cool yeah you're gonna do it

I want to write it has to be written though because it's not that it's not a loosey-goosey you really have to like

yeah you really want to like make it right and get it all in there that's exciting yeah it's also pretty incredible and and kind of a bummer in a way to see

what young people's correspondence used to be like like these kids their handwriting is gorgeous but they also would write a three-page letter yeah that has now become you know three three emojis or whatever yeah and it's it's astonishing megan would read me these letters

it's like a 22-year-old year old guy on a ship and i'm like it was also uh wartime war war gorgeous yeah yeah and like great great letters fantastic great letters like

you would not believe i want there were

there were a few got well i'll send you some there were a few guys that

I got to the end like I knew there were only three more letters or whatever and I cried.

I was like, why?

Why didn't she pick this guy?

But then you wouldn't be here.

I don't care.

Isn't that a catch-22?

It really is.

Mom, you picked the wrong.

Well, hold on now.

It's inexplicable.

And yet.

Well,

we just so grateful you guys came here.

Oh, gosh.

This is so fun.

I love seeing you.

I love seeing you guys together.

We've never seen you guys together even.

Cute couple.

Thank you.

You should have seen us in the bathtub earlier.

I would have loved to have seen that.

I think our relationship definitely took a, it's in another level now.

Yeah, I'm curious.

Yeah.

Ladies and gentlemen, Nick Offerman and Megan Malali, thank you guys for coming in and talking with us.

Special thanks to our friends at Team Coco and to you for listening.

Once again, tell a friend about us and subscribe wherever you get your podcasts.

If you're on Apple Podcasts, perhaps you'd like to give us a great rating and review.

It actually helps a great deal.

Thank you.

If you like watching your podcast, full episodes are on Team Coco's YouTube channel.

I'll see you next time.

Where everybody knows your name.

You've been listening to Where Everybody Knows Your Name with Ted Dance and Woody Harrelson.

Sometimes.

The show is produced by me, Nick Leow.

Executive producers are Adam Sachs, Colin Anderson, Jeff Ross, and myself.

Sarah Fedorovich is our supervising producer.

Our senior producer is Matt Apodaka.

Engineering and Mixing by Joanna Samuel with support from Eduardo Perez.

Research by Alyssa Grawl.

Talent Booking by Paula Davis and Gina Batista.

Our theme music is by Woody Harrelson, Anthony Gen, Mary Steenbergen, and John Osborne.

Special thanks to Willie Navarre.

We'll have more for you next time where everybody knows your name.

Hey everybody, it's Paul Shearer, host of How Did This Get Made, a podcast that covers the best, worst movies.

This week, we're diving into the brand new War of the Worlds reboot starring Ice Cube.

Yes, the movie that got 2% on Rotten Tomatoes.

Ice Cube is saving the world from aliens via his computer.

It's so...

convoluted this plot but basically if you have an amazon account you can save the day just like Ice Cube.

There is so much going on in this movie, so join me, June Diane Rayfill, and Jason Manzukis, as we break down every bizarre choice and every Ice Cube one-liner on this week's episode of How Did This Get Made?

The podcast that makes sense of movies that don't.