Our Top Five Power Tools

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You listen to the Auntie Donna podcast, the greatest fucking podcast in the world.

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Hello, everybody.

Welcome to the Auntie Donna Podcast.

A podcast that we have, all of this year, stopped banking.

We no longer bank this podcast.

If you don't know what that means, banking is something we used to do.

We would do multiple podcasts at once.

People caught us out for that because we talked about it a lot.

And rightly so.

There are some people that still believe they catch us out for it.

And I will say, even if we were banking, they're wrong in how we do it.

So they're the biggest idiots.

But I will say we never bank now.

And as proof, we never bank, we always have a thing.

That being said,

we all have the vaguest memory that this episode was meant to be about something.

Yes.

That there was a topic for this episode,

but none of us can quite recall what it is.

It's in the five weeks of Christmas.

It's during

that period.

Yes.

I believe.

I remember someone said, oh, an episode will be coming out on a day.

Yeah.

And that day will be of note.

Now, that day is in a couple of days because that's how quickly we do it.

We don't even give our staff time to edit clips or edit the podcast now.

They do crunch for you.

Yeah they crunch.

So it is in two days, one day, but I just can't remember what it is.

So we're going to just sort of fill until we figure it out.

Top five power tools.

Top five power tools.

Okay, now that is that what it was about?

No.

It was something like that.

But I think

we can talk about power tools until we figure it out.

Grinders.

Number one for me has got to be nail gun.

Love a nail gun.

I mean, there is a national worship of tools day, which is March 11th.

Worship of tools.

That's what.

Do you know there's a flag?

A country.

Yeah, I'm very aware.

No, there's many flags.

Oh, right, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Do you know there's a flag with an AK-47 on it?

Mozambique has an AK-47 on their flag.

Is that their national animal?

No, it's a gun.

Mm.

It has a gun, has a...

Is a gun a power tool?

Like a sickle as well.

A sickle and a power.

And a book.

Oh, and a book.

Well, then that's a balance.

I think we should just think of something to do to fill until we figure out what this episode was meant to be about.

I think power tools is good.

I'm happy to do my top five power tools.

Maybe I'll do a character.

You do a character.

I think each of us do our top five power tools.

They can't be the same ones.

I don't think power tools is what we were going to talk about today.

It was something like that.

Yeah.

It was a top five power something.

I'm ready to go.

All right, let's go.

What are yours?

Number five.

We'll start with number one.

The best one.

That's not how you do all this, bro.

No.

Build tension.

All right.

I think just get it out of the way.

Just let me know the buttons.

I'm going to go with number one first, and that is a whipper snipper.

Nice.

How come?

I love the way it gets those, cleans up that lawn.

Also referred to as a weed whacker in some places.

Yeah, in America.

Yeah, in some places.

And Mark, we're talking power tools here, not your mouses and your little webcams.

Well, I mean, in the world of Fortnite, that stuff can be very powerful.

We're talking about the things real men use.

I know.

I re-upholstered a cat toy recently.

So I'm aware of tools.

Okay, okay.

Number two.

There's a little bit more in you than I thought.

A little buckaroony.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Little bucker.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

I like number two, a power drill that allows you to drill into brick.

Fuck yes.

Yeah, it's uh, you know what?

That's referred.

That's referred to as a hammer drill.

Correct.

Yes.

A hammer drill,

I recently watched my partner use one as they put a retractable hose into our brick worker.

Yes.

Do you like it because it goes va-boom, va-boom, vaboom, boom?

I look at brick and I say, you can't be beaten.

And then I see.

You get a masonry drill part.

You get a hammer drill.

Yeah.

You go straight in there, man.

Yeah, yeah.

And now I've got a beautiful hose on the wall.

At number three, a spray gun.

A spray gun?

Not ray gun.

Not ray gun.

No, not ray gun.

Who took home our hearts this year.

Really?

She.

last week she looks she was so good last week unnear unrecognizable

uh in those photos uh on the cover of the magazine is that what you're talking about no I'm talking about last week at the Olympics when Ray Gunn

did that weird dancing what's with the Ray Gun dancing

What do you mean what's with it?

Have you seen Ray Gunn dancing?

Yeah.

Ray Gunn this, Ray Gun that, Ray Gunn this, Ray Gun that.

Everyone's talking about Ray Gunn.

I thought she did a, I thought, you know, I thought she did a top-notch job i think she i think i disagree i think it's a besmirchment on the game

yeah you know i saw a dance and i was like i i remember saying out loud i said hell yes queen cool that was my reaction to it okay

at number

the spray gun though not ray gun right Spray gun.

Let you paint quicker.

We did a whole fence in a morning.

Really?

Yeah.

Really?

Yep.

A whole fence.

Too late.

Daddy's got a headache.

At number four.

At number four.

Oh, no.

You shouldn't have to have to whisper the whole thing.

Yeah.

Yeah.

This just came in.

Daddy was out a little late last night.

Take your headphones off.

Was that for Christmas Eve party?

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

It'd be around then, wouldn't it?

Yeah.

Yeah.

Number four, Lorne Mower.

Lorne Michaels.

No, Lorne Mower.

Stop taking the power tools that I'm saying and putting a name to them.

I'm trying to understand

that in my world.

You've just imagined.

Do you understand?

I just said Spray Gun, and you went Ray Gunn, the dancer who shamed Australia at the Olympics.

Some would say,

others would say, yes, go for it.

Do you know what I think?

I think Ray Gunn represented our culture perfectly.

Right.

And exactly as we deserve.

But then you turn around and then I say lawnmower and you say Lorne Michaels.

Well, do you understand that I don't know what a lawnmower is?

I don't know what that does.

I presume it does something with your lawn.

Natural or electric.

But I do know who Lorne Michaels is.

He's the most powerful figure in our world, the world of sketch comedy.

To me, he is the greatest power tool.

He is your lawnmower.

He is to me what a lawnmower is to you.

Because I'm a mover shaker in the comedy world.

I'm shocked that you do not think of Lorne Michael that way.

No, I think of, I just my lawn too long and I say, let's give that.

Oh, is that what it does?

Yeah.

At number five, this is your least favorite power tool in the world.

No, no, no, no, no.

Least favourite of his top five.

The Hitler stick.

What's the Hitler stick?

Oh, it's just an awful

Hitler stick.

Yeah, he's a bad guy.

That's why I hate it.

Yeah.

No, you hear my top five tower tools?

Yeah.

Tower tools.

Tower tools.

Let's see.

Let's hear your top five tower tools.

Number one.

Number one.

A crane.

Yeah.

How you going to build that tower without that crane?

You need a crane?

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

You need a crane.

Number two, those laser things that make sure the ground is even.

You know, those little laser

leveler, but the ones where they shoot it across the path.

Laser leveler.

Yeah.

Number three,

gotta be...

Number three's gotta be...

Welder.

Oh, yeah, welder.

Yeah, very nice.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

How are you gonna make that steel stick to that other piece of steel?

When someone says that they love that tool, I go, well, duh.

duh yeah yeah yeah yeah because it's uh i've got these two beams yeah and i need them to uh be one how am i going to do that without without a welding uh apparatus duh yeah well oh

now number four did you not get that the first time i did that no i did not but you are the guy who would do that you're the one that does that yeah the most straight over my head well duh yeah yes a welder yeah the number four a little bit of a controversial choice.

Some of you might not consider this a tower tool, but it's a piece of machinery or multiple pieces of machinery used in the process of making a tower.

It's the truck.

Yeah.

A lot of towers now are modular, particularly the hotels, particularly as inner cities.

This makes me think of an interesting question, though.

What is a tool?

What is a space?

What is a tower tool space?

I know some of you act like them sometimes.

Get out of here, man.

If you ever show me that kind of disrespect again, I'm out of the group.

I'm so sorry.

He's not joking.

I'm sorry.

That was so disrespectful.

I'm not at all.

No, no, no.

I understand that.

I was.

Gotcha.

Gotcha.

I was doing a prank.

You did a Joe Pesci on you in the

other fellas.

A little prank there.

I don't.

Well, why not Kimbra?

Pardon me?

Why not Kimbra?

What do you mean?

I don't understand.

Why not Kimbra?

A little prank.

Somebody I used to know.

Kimbra.

Featuring Kimbra.

What about Kimbra?

Did I say somebody I used to know?

Featuring Kimbra.

But why are we talking about Kimbra?

Because you brought her up.

Why did I bring up Kimbra?

And you were talking about her music.

When you said Tricta.

Tricture, Kimbra.

Right.

Right, right, right, right, right, right, right.

Somebody I used to know.

Hey, I'm so sorry if that created a weird vibe when I was like, well, fuck you.

Don't call me a tool.

I had a mild panic attack.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

I felt my chest tighten.

But as soon as you said Tricta,

it reminded me of that song.

Kimbra.

Featuring Kimbra.

No, I believe the name of the song is Kimbra.

I think it's somebody I used to know.

It's about a guy and a girl who used to know someone named Kimbra.

Right.

Now, number five.

Now you're just somebody that I used to know called Kimbrimbra.

Kimra.

That's why Kimbra comes in and sings that verse.

Because he's singing verse.

Then I am Kimbra.

Yeah, she's talking from the perspective of Kimbra.

So there's two perspectives.

There's a perspective

Trick Joe, and there's the perspective of Kimbra.

There's a perspective of the lead singer, someone who used to know Kimbra,

and then Kimbra represents Kimbra in the song.

I am Kimbra.

She's like, you know, well, you know, like, because he's like, he got

broke up with Kimbra, I presume.

He's singing from the perspective of Kimbra's ex-boyfriend.

And then Kimbra is playing Kimbra.

Does this make sense?

So, Gautier

in the song, Somebody I Used to Know

is singing from someone who has dated Kimbra.

Not Gautier.

So now, because I think what you're thinking right now is, who's to say that this song that Gautier wrote, who's to say that it's not from the perspective of Gautier?

Yes.

And Kimbra is

a strange perspective.

A lot of people might think that this song is about...

Gautier and somebody he used to know and Kimber is playing that person.

Not true.

Kimbra is playing Kimbra.

That's the twist.

Does this make sense?

Gautier is playing someone who dated Kimbra.

Yeah, Kimbra.

And Kimbra is playing Kimbra.

So Gautier sat down as purely intellectual exercise and thought to himself, I don't used to know anybody, but imagine if I was somebody that used to know Kimbra.

Do you understand?

And then he thought about it.

And it's amazing that the lyrics are so personal and so raw and it had such an impact on the world because it was purely an intellectual exercise.

I mean, the only alternative is that he was singing from his own perspective and then Kimbra came in and sang as the other person.

And he wrote the song, so probably, like, statistically.

You think that's more likely?

Yes.

You think that's more likely than Gorje sitting down,

singing a song from the perspective of...

Why did he ask Kimbra to sing it then?

She was probably available.

Great.

He liked her voice.

Yeah.

Yeah.

But also because she's the only one that can play kimbra

do you understand and meryl streep i think could do yeah some good actors but i think he would have gone

lisa mccue my question is do you think someone else is gonna play kimbra and then they're like well we could ask kimbra

and your and your number five

tower tool tower tool go be one of the wench yes as in what is a wench as in like a witch dismissive oh right yes or a pulley system pulley system the pulley

Am I right?

A winch is a pulley, yes.

No?

Well, there's two meanings.

I don't need to go into the first one.

Yeah, no, no, no.

I'm not using such sexist, archaic terminology as that.

Well, that says archaic here, actually, is in the definition.

Habitually associated.

No, I don't know that.

No, no, no, let's not go into that.

No, both.

I don't think...

I think I'm a winch, maybe.

Winch!

A winch.

I meant to say winch.

I would hate...

If you're...

I don't want anyone sitting at home thinking that I

to build a tower.

No.

No, winches don't build towers.

A winch, a winch.

What is a winch?

What's the definition of a winch?

A winch is, of course, a hauling or lifting device consisting of a rope and chain winding around a horizontal rotating drum.

See, everything is a drum.

Mark, I've got a question for you.

What are your favourite flavours?

Flavorite.

What are your favourite

flavours?

What are your flavourite flavours?

What are your favourite flavours?

Flavourite flavours in general?

Well, there's only five flavours, so what are your favourite flavours?

What do you mean there's only five?

Are you talking about the basic flavours?

There's not only five.

Sweet?

There's not only five.

Sweet, umami, sour.

You are forgetting.

You are forgetting dirt.

Dirt.

No, but you're forgetting the combination of that.

Where does dirt sit?

Where does dirt sit if it's not its own flavor palette?

It depends on the dirt.

No.

It sits on its own.

But dirt would be like kind of a quite a I would say it's like quite a savory.

No.

You say dirt isn't a flavor, but then you go, well, this wine was grown in this dirt and it tastes like this.

And it's different to that wine, which was grown in that dirt.

You know what?

My knowledge of these things is so far past its limit right now.

Dirt is a flavor.

You think dirt is a flavor?

Dirt is a flavor.

So that's number five for you?

Yeah.

Or one?

It's number five.

Can you err towards the known

towards?

Can I at least get a couple of umamis and sweets and some flour is number four?

You know, just a couple for Zach.

Dirt and muck.

I'll just fill in.

I've got this, Zach.

We'll have a couple of, we'll get some bowl of chips for the table.

We'll have a sweet and sour pork.

We will have.

Sweet, sour.

Umami.

A prawn toast.

For the mukbang.

Umami.

Is that one of those?

Prawn toast.

Yeah.

And then a Coke for me.

Yeah.

I'll get a Coke Zero.

Coke and sugar, I think.

We'll have a

peach iced tea.

And then, so.

Oh, actually, I'll make that a Coke.

I've got a show tonight.

A couple of pizzas.

What are you doing?

Pizza and Chinese?

Where are we?

Edinburgh?

This is my dream of a place.

And where I get chips, I get honey, chicken, you know, sweet and sour pork, and I'm getting pizzas.

That's very Edinburgh.

That's like your

monkey's paw, isn't it?

You can have all the foods you want, but they're mushy and saltless.

And no one will come see your show oh no we sold pretty well yeah we did pretty well well i just if i'm talking to a young person going to edinburgh what i'm saying to them is you get good crowds you wake up the next morning one ticket sold get out there flyer again you're tired get out do that set on the royal mile get out and do that variety show get caught a horrible thing doing a sketch character then you do that show you're exhausted go to bed wake up the next day one again sold again yeah and you're off you're off to the race it's always that same person and that

one fucking team.

And you're thanking

me for coming.

Hey, I'm back for the show.

Oh, hello.

I hate them.

Slop would be number three.

You're serious, bro.

Dirt, muck, slop.

Dirt, muck, and slop.

Yeah.

You like all these flavours?

I don't like them.

I'm ranking them.

You don't have a lot of room for the yummy ones left.

Like what?

And then sweet and sour.

So you like slop more than umami?

Yeah, I do.

You're fucking loco.

Yeah, man.

Bro, you're fucking loco.

Take him through them again.

Flavor.

Dirt.

Flavorite flavours.

Dirt.

Dirt.

Dirt.

Muck.

Muck.

Muck is like the stuff at the top of a sewer pipe.

Yeah.

Yeah.

It's interesting.

It's an interesting flavor.

Yeah.

And you like that more than

I like it more than slop.

You like it slop.

No, less than slop.

What are the other flavours?

Dirt, muck.

Slop.

Slop.

You like the top.

Sweet and sour.

And then sweet and sour.

Yeah, sweet and sour.

Sour number one.

Oh, yeah.

Yeah, I do like sour.

Yeah, and give me a sour slop and I'm in heaven.

All right, here's my question to you through Christmas.

What about it?

I don't know.

It just popped into my head.

Yeah.

Anyway, sorry about that.

I don't know why I said that.

I'm so sorry I said that.

It's all right.

I don't know why it was just sort of like an involuntary.

I'd be more sorry about one of your favorite tower tools being a truck than I would be about.

Are you really serious right now?

You don't think it's a tower tool?

I knew it was controversial.

I don't think it's a tower tool, no.

Okay, no, I think I'd say

it's just what is a tool.

Yeah, you know, that was my question.

I'm looking at two right now.

Yeah, I was going to say Donald Trump.

Excuse me?

What did you just say?

I called you both in a jocular fashion.

Context is important.

Yeah, no, that is.

But just before we do, Lindsay, can you just note that Mark made a joke about Donald Trump?

Just, you know, just

make a note

if the fall of the American Empire has occurred by the time this episode comes out, might want to cut it.

Or.

But if it's fine.

Yeah.

Leave it in.

You know what I mean?

Just test the waters is what I would say if this was banked.

But it's not.

We are recording this

today on December 24th.

Now,

did you want to drill down on the tool thing and why I said that?

You know what?

At first I was like, what the fuck?

What the fuck?

You know, remember when I was a kid?

Oh, yeah, you were mad, yeah.

What the fuck?

Why would you call me a tool?

You're a tool.

Fuck you.

But then he was joking.

And then I was like, wait a second, what is the nature of this podcast?

It's about three mates having a laugh.

You're a bloke.

yeah you're a bloke that's how you're a flesh and blood man yeah thanks dickheads see again right now my first instinct is like fuck you you're a fucking dick fuck you fucking kill you but he's joking i'll fucking kill you and i go wait a second that's how blokes joke it's a bloke joke yeah and that's what i gotta remind myself well wait a second that's a bloke joke let's give some examples of bloke jokes okay so i'm gonna set up a scene where you two are blokes yeah and you're about to one of you is gonna fire off a rip a bloke joke okay a bloke joke where are we uh We're at the football.

So we finished our football season.

Which code?

Which code?

Which code?

Let's leave it generic for our NS.

I don't want to alienate our NSW followers.

It's high school, year 12.

Can I just say though, when you do leave it generic, you make it more broadly accessible, but you are losing the magic of the specificity.

But I don't.

So does NRL go to Bali after their season?

I don't know.

Well, then let's go with AFL then.

But it's not AFL.

It's just, it's not,

you know, it's not AFL.

It's just Aussie rules.

We're just a local country team.

Yes.

Some of our players are paid.

You're one of the paid players.

You come in from the city.

You played for VFL for a time.

Now you come to our country town on Sunday Saturdays.

How well are you paid?

I would, you know, I'd get cashies.

I'd get a cash, you know, an envelope with two grand in it for a game kind of deal.

Yeah, right.

And he comes down, he helps us out.

He doesn't have to practice with us, he could sometimes do, but for the most part, he doesn't.

He just comes and kicks a lot of goals.

Nice, you're that guy, but you've very generously come to Bali with us, yeah, for sure.

Okay, and why am I in this scene?

We're all in Bali together, and one of you is going to give a ripper bloke joke,

right?

Yeah, here's the bloke joke.

Or do we need to say who's going to give the bloke joke?

No, we've just set the scene, all right.

Well, here we are in Bali.

Uh, yep.

Uh,

uh, we're we've uh booked into the hotel would you blokes like a beer uh yeah I'd love a beer no thanks in a glass please yeah no thanks I'm not drinking for this trip

okay now here's where the bloke joke will come yeah yeah

do you want to do it or oh I thought he was going to do the is he not doing it well yeah I it was a bloke joke what I was doing is a bloke joke but I think a real bloke joke I think we can have an opportunity for two bloke jokes So let's hold off on my bloke joke reveal.

My bloke trick.

Yeah.

My bloke joke trick.

Okay, I'll give you bloke joke later one.

Oh, you're not drinking.

Are you worried it'll get stuck in your dress?

Right.

And then I'll say, I'll say, no, no, it's just me and the misso are doing dry July.

Right.

Does one of you want to say something derogatory about my partner?

That would be a bloke joke.

I don't feel super comfortable.

You don't want to say something derogatory about my partner?

Because she's encouraging me to not drink when away with the boys.

Now, a bloke joke here would be to say something cruel and derogatory about her.

Maybe implying,

even though there's been signs that I've been a bad partner.

I'll give you an example.

She's got you by the long and curlies.

Yeah.

Right, okay.

That's an implication that perhaps she has more power in this relationship than I do.

Oh, yeah, all right, I got one.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Gee, I can tell who's wearing the pants in that relationship, right?

And that's great because that's kept a thematic costume link to my bloke joke.

Yes.

Pants are for boys, dresses are for girls.

Now, these are not my opinions.

No, these are the opinions of the bloke joke.

This is bloke joke.

Bloke joke.

This is the bloke joke universal.

And do I approve of it?

No.

What I'm trying to do is remind myself not to.

If my feelings are, your feelings can be hurt.

But if my feelings are hurt by a bloke joke, I try to say it's just a bloke joke.

Just let it run down my back like the water on a duck.

Okay, so then you've, and then, so you've had two bloke jokes directed at you.

And now I will

close out the bloke joke and say,

boys, I was bloke joking.

Great.

Of course I'm not A.

And then after A, I would say something horrifically.

Something indefensibly cruel.

Yeah.

A word that has been heard by people as they are being killed.

But you would go, ha ha ha ha.

And then we'd drink the night night away and then we'd drink the night away.

Yeah, this is how the bloke joke works

Now you were not doing a cruel bloke joke, but it was a bloke joke

and I just say to myself it's a bloke joke

I'll let that like like the slippery like the smooth

coagulated water on the waterproof feathers of a duck.

I let it run

yeah

Because there's all this water that's come off the duck's back.

Why aren't we bottling it and then calling it water from the duck's back?

This is like a Bell Delphine kind of thing?

No, no.

Just as like

you've got Mount Franklin, water from Mount Franklin.

Right.

You've got

Mount Fuji.

Mount Fuji.

Mount Fuji, they're delicious waters, but they're not instantly.

Let him finish his list of

mountain waters.

But before you do, list your your waters, then I want to set you up for your you've got pump.

Water from the pump.

Pump that out of the ground.

They pump that out of the ground, right?

All

Coals, Coals water.

Water from Coles.

Water from, I believe, from Coal.

Yeah.

Right?

From Coal.

Not true.

It's not?

I know Cole, and he's never offered me water.

Right.

Anyway.

Okay, yep, yep, yep, yep, yep.

Every water

is from somewhere.

All right, now can I do the setup?

Is that okay?

Yeah.

But obviously it's for you.

Is this a bloke joke?

No, no, no, no, no.

What I'm saying is, all those waters, they're good.

They're yummy, fresh.

I love their minerals.

Some have

different pH levels.

But my issue with those waters, Mark, is they don't instill me with a sense of fortitude.

They don't instill me with a sense of resilience.

But water from the duck's back

potentially would.

And then I would say to you, I think that's more of a metaphor.

Talking about the fact that the water doesn't get in touch with the duck's back and you need to treat the insults.

There's no scientific difference.

No,

it touches the duck's back.

It touches the feather, but it's talking about the waterproof quality of the feathers.

Exactly.

And what I'm saying is there's no scientific difference to that water, and you're a charlatan.

What I'm saying is if you try to sell that water

to vulnerable humans.

I don't understand what's going on.

What have you done, Mark?

I don't understand what's fucking ticked him off to the point where he's at boiling.

I feel like I'm in my kitchen, I've put on a cup of tea,

and I'm just ready to pour that cup of tea

and the kettle scream.

Well, here's the tea.

You're a charlatan.

Mark, what's the best way to treat this?

Probably with a knife.

I would say just water off a duck.

Oh, George.

Oh, right.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

No, you know what?

Do you know what this is to me?

This is water.

This is like water off a duck's back, which I will bottle and sell to the masses.

And, Mark, I was doing a bloke joke.

Fuck!

I didn't give a fuck about your water, whatever the fuck.

Well, that's because I'm not going to allow you to invest in this company.

I don't want to fucking invest in it.

I'm investing, like a bloke.

I'm investing all of mine and my partner's money in NFTs.

No, AI now.

AI now, yeah, yeah.

In AI shares.

I am not checking with her if that's okay.

It's a bloke joke.

I'm taking our money the same way that I put it into NFTs two years ago.

Now I'm putting our money into shares in AI companies and machine learning companies.

Yeah.

And now's for the reveal.

We knew it was Christmas all along.

We knew that today was Christmas Day, but we wanted to give you a fucking reprieve from all the shit.

Some podcasts have been doing Christmas episodes for five weeks.

Yeah.

They can get fucked.

Yeah.

This was a Christmas episode.

By about two two o'clock in the afternoon on Christmas Day, you're done with it.

Give me something else to watch.

Give me something else to talk about.

Yeah, I got all this ham piling up.

Black pud.

Black pud.

In case anyone's listening on Christmas Day, sometimes they listen the day after or whatever.

But if anyone's listening on Christmas Day, they might want to watch put.

Oh, yeah, watch put.

Yeah.

I mean, also,

every Christmas, three o'clock, I just want to, I just want a bloke joke.

I know.

Just to switch off a classic bloke joke just to get me through the rest of the day.

Something that it'll just knock me out.

Now, you might have heard a few bloke jokes at the Christmas table.

Maybe your uncle or your dad or your stepdad made a few bloke jokes.

They hurt your feelings.

Call them out.

If you feel safe to do so.

Otherwise, just come listen to our podcast.

Yeah, they are silly little bloke jokes.

But we hope Santa came.

I hope Santa.

Well, I think now that Santa has some time off, hopefully he'll be able to come.

Yeah.

It's stressful.

Sometimes he can't get there because I don't think he'd be coming much on Christmas.

But it just gets in his head sometimes and he just can't.

So you reckon he maybe just quickly rubs one out.

I think it's, yeah, like sometimes it's to just do it in the, I guess, the back of the sleigh when the...

Yeah.

When them deer, when them deer ain't watching.

But that is all to say, we hope you and your family have a wonderful holiday season.

I'll have Merry Christmas.

Happy holidays.

Happy year, Hanukkah.

Now the tradition starts of our best ofs and the ones you voted for, and we hope you enjoy them.

And Broden, Merry Christmas to you.

Oh, thanks.

Mark, Merry Christmas to you.

Merry Christmas to you, sir.

And if anyone wants to wish me a Merry Christmas.

I just did.

I literally just did.

Broden, did you want to?

I did.

I don't remember you.

Did you?

You did.

Did you want to do it again?

You've got to let it go, ma'am.

I'll do it again.

I'll do it if you do yours again because.

Just let it go, ma'am.

I was.

Days, I I was bloke joking.

I don't give a fuck about this, Christmas.

May you have a great day of bloke joking.

But thank you for a little bit more water for my company.

Yeah, all right.

Because you took all of that.

It was like water off a duck's back.

Yeah, all right.

Capturing that in a bottle.

Okay, yeah, yeah.

That's just my sweat and urine.

Yeah.

You can give us out my sweat and urine.

I'll filter it.

I'll filter it.

Okay, whatever, bro.

You can drink your own piss.

Whatever, bro.

And on that note, see you next week.

You've been listening to the Auntie Donor Podcast.

Thanks for joining us for another rip episode brought to you by Auntie DonorClub.com.

See you next week.

Listener.