Sultairing Us A Barn

A listener production.

Hi, welcome to the Auntie Donna podcast.

I'm one of the stars of that podcast, Zachary Rowan, here to do a little intro for you.

If you've not heard of it, it's basically just a funny, wacky, improvised podcast where all the guys from PUD riff on ideas.

This episode is a little bit different, though, because Mark has brought in a prop.

We have got a box of little cereals, and we are going to have a very fun time with that.

If you want to see the visuals, which will be very funny because you'll see the little cereals,

head to auntie DonnaClub.com where you can watch the podcast as well as a whole bunch of fun bonus things.

Like one time I think we did Mario, maybe.

Anyway, enjoy the podcast.

We hope you enjoyed the motherfucking podcast.

Good morning.

Couple of little songbirds.

Sorry, I didn't mean to talk over you there.

Sorry, can we just start again?

Yeah, it was just because you guys were whistling and I was listening.

Let's start again.

Let's not.

Are you mad at me?

Let's not.

It's fine.

I just don't want to make a big thing out of it.

Let's just do a rule.

If someone else is talking, shut your fucking mouth.

All right, well, what if someone's fucking whistling, cunt?

I think that fucking counts.

Oh, so whistling is talking now.

Well, hey.

Whistling is talking.

What does this whistle mean?

I don't know.

I'm not a seraphite.

It means I'm loving it.

Oh, okay.

It means I'm fucking loving it.

Can't.

Well, if I could whistle, I would do something right now.

You can't whistle?

No.

You can't whistle.

Mark, I didn't put some...

Lindsay, put some sad music in post.

Mark, I didn't know that I can't whistle.

Anyone could whistle.

All you got to do is perk your lips and go...

That's all you have to do.

It's that fucking easy.

What are you going to do?

Purse those lips and blow.

Try.

If it was that easy, I'd be able to do it.

Oh, come on, buddy.

All you gotta do is press purse those lips and blow for you.

Go!

Now you're doing something with your tongue.

What are you doing?

What are you doing with this?

To anyone listening who maybe thought that was Mark having this big moment, that was Broden Winston.

Yeah, no, I'm just showing you how it's done and how simple it is.

I won't be whistling.

I can't whistle.

Just, just.

I don't feel good about this.

I don't know why we're focusing on it.

It's embarrassing.

Oh, you're close.

Do you hear that wind going through that little hole there?

Yes, I hear the wind going through the hole.

It's like the wind going through a valley, whistling through a valley.

You're getting that.

You're getting that.

No, all I'm doing is breathing out a small hole in my mouth.

I'm not.

Mark, Mark, Mark.

I think you're getting it.

No, I'm not.

He's getting it.

He's getting it.

Would you ever be the first people to sit me down and try and fucking talk me through this?

Well, you were just really close then.

You were like.

Now, tighter, tighter, tighter.

But your holes aren't tight.

It's got to be the tight.

Do it for three minutes.

Now, for clarity, that is Zach.

Sorry, if anyone's listening here thinks that...

Hey!

No, no, no.

He's getting it.

No, I'm not.

I heard a sound.

Hey, what's that you got here?

Cereal boxes?

Yeah, I've got some cereal in today.

Why?

Oh, that's perfect.

I've just woken up and I've come downstairs and I'm hungry for breakfast, but not something like crumpets or English muffins or bread for dead.

Or bacon or egg riffs.

Or egg riffs.

I don't need egg riffs.

Stop, stop, stop.

I don't need egg riffs.

What's an egg riff?

Yeah, bacon or egg riffs.

Yeah, bacon and egg riffs every day, don't you?

You want to do an egg riff?

You want to do a riff about eggs?

Yeah, it's, yeah.

Where is it coming from?

What were you trying this time?

I don't know.

I don't know.

I love egg egg riffs.

I'm pre-rattled from all the whistling sounds, to be honest.

I love egg riffs.

Getting caught in an egg riff, I suppose.

I don't know.

Like a wave.

Like a wave rip?

A riff.

Yeah, a riff.

No, rip.

Getting caught in a rip.

It's not a riff.

You don't get caught in a riff in the ocean.

A riff is something else.

What's a riff?

Guitar riff?

Yeah, an egg riff.

Sounds like an egg.

A guitar?

Egg riff.

Well, just a riff.

It can be on anything.

You can riff on a clarinet.

Yeah, you can riff in comedy.

Yeah, and so...

I think that's the clearest one.

Do a riff on eggs.

All right.

Let it be that.

Are you going to let it be that?

That's not what I was thinking, but I'm happy to let it be that.

What were you thinking?

I'm not sure that it wasn't that.

Now.

You think a closer thing...

You were willing to accept...

Yeah.

You were willing to accept a guitar riff about eggs.

That felt closer to what I was going for.

Zach's having Coco Pops.

Well, no.

Don't you fucking have those Coco Pops?

Why the fuck not?

Cunt.

Because we're doing an egg riff.

Don't you fucking put those Cocoa Pops in your mouth.

And we agreed on a podcast where I got to eat Coco Pops and then you started doing this bullshit about egg riff.

If you put those Cocoa Pops in your mouth, so help me.

You had the opportunity to give me Coco Pops and be riffing about it.

You can't come in here

and force your way to a big bowl of Coco Pops for breakfast.

Broden, Broden, Broden, I have a question.

Don't you eat those Coco Pops?

I have a question before he eats the Coco Pops and you get fully upset.

You go full tilt.

Yeah, I'll go full Broden.

Well, I have a question.

Are you upset that he's eating the Coco Pops?

He's eating the Coco Pops.

Zach, I was in the middle of a Coco Pops.

Yeah, and you were distracting him, giving me the perfect opportunity to eat Coco Pops.

No!

My question is, are you upset because you don't have Coco Pops?

Is that why you're upset?

Wait, are you saying there's two packs of Coco Pops in the Kellogg's variety pack?

Sorry, I'm saying brands.

There's two packs of something in here.

And what I want to know is, are you upset?

What's happening?

Don't eat the Cocoa Pops.

I'll accept that you're eating the Coco Pops.

Don't eat the Coco Pops into the mic.

You are a punk.

I'm trying to get...

You're a damn punk.

Now he's not even doing a podcast.

I'm trying to get...

Now he's just eating Coco Pops off mic while you and I do the job.

Brennan, I need you to breathe.

I need you to do some...

I need you to whistle.

I'll breathe when you whistle.

I can't.

My God.

Well, I guess I'm going to die.

All right.

Are you upset because there are no Coco Pops for Broden?

Because I'm trying to track why you're upset and I can't figure out.

You can't figure out why I'm upset.

No.

You can't figure out why.

Because folks, if he keeps it, if he, you, Mark, I mean, Zach, so help me if you finish that bowl of cocoa pops while we're recording a podcast I will go classic Broden archetype grumpy guy I just I need to understand the motivations and the reasons why here because you and I are recording a podcast yeah yeah which is we're here to do today

not to eat breakfast you should have had breakfast before you came here so you would say that I'm not even on mic I'm just eating you know what I mean yeah yeah yeah yeah so pull your weight you would be as upset if say he was eating corn flakes or if he was eating special K.

I think let me finish.

Or if he was eating Just Right.

Or if he was eating Nutri Grain, or if he was eating Sultana brand.

You would be just as upset.

You would be just as upset.

So what's happening now is Zach is pulling out the second packet of Cocoa Pops.

It's perfectly, the variety pack, we have a variety pack of Kellogg's

Kellogg's variety pack assorted cereals.

Who have not paid us.

Who have not paid us.

And each one of us.

Zach, don't eat a second bowl of Coco Pops.

It's perfectly portioned for one bowl of cereal.

He's eating two bowls of Coco Pops.

It was one thing.

You're being a greedy guy.

It was one thing when he was eating Coco Pops.

Now, one session.

I got one of all these Cocoa Pops.

I'm slightly changing track here.

I'm getting on a different train.

And this is a great train to be on, but I'm just going to jump onto another train while these two trains are passing.

So there is the opportunity to jump back onto the other train if we want.

This is outrageous.

Here's my question for you.

The NutriGrain packet of Kellogg's variety cereal, assorted pack, it's 25 grams.

25 grams of Nutragrain.

That's the recommended amount of breakfast cereal.

For just right,

which is not too heavy, not too light.

It's 40 grams.

Does that sound just right to you?

No, it sounds disproportionate.

It's just right for just right.

Is it?

Why what's just right for just right, not just right for Nutragrain?

I'll tell you, cunt face.

Because Nutragrain cunt.

Cunt Nutrograin from fucking Kellogg's Kellogg's cunt.

Yeah.

Zach is just looking at me and not recording.

Well, it's because you're being quite aggressive.

Fruit is in just right.

Nutragrain is just Nutrograin.

What's fruit got to do with it?

It weighs different to wheat.

But there's more.

There's more just right.

It weighs different.

It weighs different.

Let's have a look at the sugar.

That's a different metric.

Let's have a look at the sugar though, because I would say, I would say sugar's going to play into it.

I think sugar's going to play into it.

Well better because now you've gone a whole way.

Meanwhile, Mr.

Coco pops over here.

Mike pushed literally 20 centimeters away from his face as he enjoys his breakfast.

You told me you didn't want me eating into the microphone.

What do you want, ma'am?

To put the Kelloggs away.

Look, look.

I'm coming in every now and then.

I'm giving you what you need.

When we started this podcast, when we started this podcast, we wanted to have a fun, breakfast-based podcast about cereals, about a variety pack of cereals.

So far, we have just been in fighting.

At each other's necks.

At each other's.

Yeah, at each other's necks, I suppose.

It's just a turn of phrase on what you were saying.

It's it's it's it's it is it?

Yes.

At each other's necks.

I've never heard that before.

I've heard at each other's gallery.

I've heard

each other's throat.

You know the shape.

At each other's necks feels like a vamp something, a vampire.

Were you listening?

No, it's a dog go for neck.

Throat, it's at each other's throats.

You are right.

You are right.

And the throat, to be fair, is on the neck.

Maybe masseuses at a conference are at each other's necks.

That would be back, neck, and shoulders.

No, they would be like, we are at each other's back, neck, and shoulders.

You know, our prisoners get throat massages.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Too, I imagine that's because that's where the larynx is.

No, Doug can't.

See, now not only is he not doing 90% of this podcast, he's eating his breakfast.

He's chiming in with negativity.

And Mark, why are you reaching into that, Kellogg's?

Because this podcast is Sultana branding us apart.

Sol tearing us apart.

Soltering us a barn.

This podcast is Soltering Us a Barn.

Can you call this episode Soltering Us a Barn?

Because like Masuses, we are at each other's head, neck, and shoulders.

Back, neck, and shoulders.

Yeah,

and like masseuses.

And like a hairdresser.

And like a hairdresser, we are chopping and

cutting and dying.

So when you go to the hairdressers, they chop at your shoulders.

Yeah.

Now he's doing bad bits when he comes on.

Like, that doesn't even make sense.

We don't have to do good bits.

He's having a fucking nice breakfast over here.

I wouldn't be concerned about doing an entertaining podcast, trying to keep the masses entertained.

The thousands and thousands of people that listen to this podcast, if I was engaging in a delicious breakfast, I have a mug here full of oat milk, specifically gotten for me.

I haven't had a chance to pour it into my bowl

to engage in a yummy breakfast.

Zach has gone ahead.

He's gone rogue.

Much like in X-Men 97, he's flirting with Magneto.

He's gone rogue.

Hey, is that bowl of cereal Magneto that you're flirting with?

Because you have gone.

Fuck this shit out, man.

You've gone rogue.

No, because he's doing the niche animated shit.

Yeah, it's quite good.

No, I don't want to get hype.

No spoilers.

Much like Rogue, Zach is flirting with Magneto, who in this case is a bowl of cocoa.

And I'm Gambit because I'm pissed off.

Yes, and I'm Beast because I'm blue

and smart.

And Zach is

going to get a coffee to accompany your fucking show.

Folks, if you are just joining us, not only is Zach just having cereal while we do this fucking show, he's gone to get a coffee to have after his breakfast.

He's abandoned his post.

He's abandoned his post

and not a a wise

soldier.

Not a wise shoulder.

No, no, no.

Bear with me here.

Not a wise shoulder.

Much like the masseuse.

Much like the masseuse,

who would never who would you would never go to a masseuse and just get the head and back or head and neck.

A wise masseuse would never abandon the shoulder.

And yet,

like a unwise soldier,

he has abandoned his post like a disgruntled

worker for Australia post.

He's abandoned his delivery of comedy.

You abandoned the post.

Yeah, that's what I was saying.

But you didn't say that.

You said abandon his deliveries.

As a post, if a postman, well, you wouldn't say

I'm saying to a postman.

Yeah, but you're going off.

He's starting with the turn of phrase.

Abandon his post.

Like an army soldier.

Your job is to guard this post.

Not literally

not a bag of

mail.

Some though, some would.

Some would.

Your job is to deliver.

Yes, PR, the Kevin, Kevin Costner would.

The mailman.

Yes, the postman.

The mailman.

He's delivering mail.

Or Postman Pat?

Yes, and

he has a white and white.

Black and white cat.

He has a black and white cat.

So much like...

So

I'm trying to draw.

I'm I'm lost in the analogy here because Zach, really, I'm like,

we should cut his pay for this.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Because him leaving in the middle of it.

It's not impossible.

We could go back into, we could talk to the person who manages our account and say, hey, just remove whatever the podcast revenue is.

Yeah, hourly rate, and then just cut it out.

It's,

well, because now I'm sitting here.

You're sitting here too.

Yeah.

Thank you.

You're so welcome.

Thank you for acknowledging that I'm sitting here.

Anytime.

I will literally do that anytime, even when you're not sitting.

Look what the cat has dragged back in.

And not Postman Pat's black and white cat, who would never abandon his post.

Postman Pat, not the cat.

He looks to me.

Although the cat would not abandon the post either, because the cat.

This is the point.

The cat.

In Postman Pat is more loyal to the male

than and has no responsibility to

deliver the mail.

What are you doing?

I'm getting somewhere this.

The cat's responsibility is to eat wet food and drink cat milk lactose-free.

And there is a loyalty to Pat.

And there's a loyalty to Pat, absolutely.

But a stray cat knows no master.

And the difference between

a

Zach's only master is

Almighty God and his son Jesus himself.

And much like the heretics who hung Jesus on the cross, who abandoned their post, Jesus did

the post, the Romans,

local boys, that's from my side of the woods, but my ads.

You're an Italian man.

Because I'm Italian.

But Sicilians were Spanish.

You do not get to come in as the arbiter of truth and history when you are having Cocoa Pops and Macchiati.

Where do you get off?

Where do you get off?

That's the long and short of it.

Where do you get off?

That's the long and short of it.

And where did you see get out?

Where did you see get out?

And where do you get off?

In the cinema while you're watching get out?

You freak?

I get off.

Did you watch get out and go, yeah, this is what gets me?

Did you watch get out and jerk off and get off?

No.

You fucking freak.

What about nope?

No.

What about Monkey Man?

Nope.

What about Warmer?

Oh,

okay, so what is the movie that Zach got off on?

What is let's find it?

What is this?

All right.

What is it in or off?

Because I'm thinking he's in cinematic.

What is the movie that Zach got off on?

What is the movie that Zach got off on?

We're going to find...

We're going to find out

what's it going to be.

What's it going to be?

One of the movies.

What?

One, two, three.

What is the movie that Zach got off on?

We're going to find out.

I forgot.

Zach, was it so monkey?

Get the fucking lyrics right.

What is the movie that Zach got off on?

Did he?

I've lost that.

I don't think we need the Zekin verse.

I think we were just.

You said Zeck verse.

Well, why don't we go to an ad break?

Maybe.

And then we'll come back with the song ready to go.

All right.

What is the movie that Zach got off on?

I wonder what the...

Your mind.

No, but I thought.

I thought...

We were just going to do the first bit twice.

What if it went, who?

And you go, what?

I go, where?

How?

I wonder what it was.

Who?

What?

Where?

How?

I wonder.

What it is.

Was.

Is or was.

Was.

I wonder what it was.

Wonder what.

Let's just work that bit.

Who?

What?

No, you go.

Who?

What?

Where?

When?

But the half-time.

Double speed that.

Oh.

Who?

What?

Where?

When?

I wonder what it was.

I wonder what it was.

What?

What is...

What?

What is the movie that Zach got off on?

He's asleep.

He's sleeping.

I don't sleep.

We're getting the intro right.

You should be thinking about the movie you jacked off in.

I don't think I've ever jacked off in a cinema.

No, no, no, no.

It could be a movie you're watching as a teenager or whatever.

Oh, yeah.

What is the movie that Zach got off on?

Who?

What?

Where?

How?

I wonder what it was.

No, no, no, no.

I did it.

I did it.

At the end, you fumbled.

Oh, man.

You are being a stickler.

Excuse me?

You're being a stickler.

You're stickling to the rules.

You're stickling to the rules of the melody, of the music.

Five, six, seven.

I wonder.

Oh, what is the movie?

What did you say?

I wonder.

But you said, I wonder too, Cun.

We both.

All right.

One, two, three.

What is the movie that Zach got off on?

Who?

What?

Where?

How?

I wonder what it was.

What are you doing?

I keep going.

I wonder what it could be.

I wonder what it was.

I wonder what it was.

I wonder what it was.

Come on, man.

We've got to move on from this movie.

Zach's asked for my laptop.

He's going to do some research.

All right.

We've got to move on from this.

You got like 15 minutes.

Not a good enough bit.

No, and I have to drill him on eating cereal.

I wonder what it was.

What is

what are you clapping?

Sorry.

What is the movie that Zach got off on?

Who?

Where?

What?

Where?

What the fuck?

Just talk through it.

Slow.

What's the movie that Zach got off on?

Who?

What?

Where?

When?

How?

How?

Yeah.

By fucking grabbing his cock and stroking it until he splows.

At home?

With the parents out?

Did he go into a room?

There's hells.

What is...

No, what is it?

Who, who?

What?

Who?

Who?

Who's all of a sudden more important than that?

It sounds better order orally.

So.

Who?

Who, where, what, how?

Who, what, where, how?

I wonder what it was.

So I'm doing where and how.

Yes.

I wonder what it was.

Let's do it half-time.

Five, six, seven, eight.

What is the movie that Zach got off on?

Who?

What?

Where?

How?

I wonder what it was.

One, two, three.

Who is...

Who?

I'm sorry.

I put my hand up and say I...

I want everyone to know from the bottom of my heart.

I'm genuinely trying.

I'm not.

I'm not sure if I can do it.

I'm not even trying to put this on or fuck it up on purpose.

This is genuinely difficult.

To come up with a great song and then just do it.

Do you think the Beatles?

Why do we like the Beatles?

Why do we like the Beatles?

Yeah.

One reason?

They wrote good songs.

Well, yeah.

That's the number one reason.

It can all be conduced to that.

Okay.

Reduced.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

I guess so.

What else could you say you like the Beatles for?

The fashion?

Five, six, seven.

What?

A wonder?

I wonder.

Sorry.

Do we need to do it?

Just go again.

Don't drill down on me.

Go again.

Go again.

Five, six, seven.

What is the movie that Zach got off on?

Who?

What?

Where?

How?

I wonder what it was.

Oh, my God.

Oh, my God.

Who did it?

Zach.

Monkey Man was close.

Which no.

What?

I was just riffing then.

Oh, so now we're going for real.

I was just doing a riff then.

And then Broden said, think of an actual movie that you jerked it to.

So now you have to figure out.

A movie.

A movie.

An actual movie.

A movie.

A movie.

An actual movie.

Short bus.

No.

Shaw shank?

No.

Redemption or repertoire?

The Shawshank repertoire.

Yeah.

Shaw.

Shaw.

Is there a movie called The Shaw?

Probably.

Shaw, Shaw, Shank, Shank.

Shank.

Why are you trying to relate words to the movie?

Well, I'm trying to find out what movies that got off on.

Yeah, but just say a different movie.

Titanic.

No.

You've got to give us cold.

Remember the Titans.

Remember the Titans.

No.

Titan.

Titan.

Bowling for Columbine.

No.

Thank God.

Yeah.

Thank God you're here.

Mark's episode of Thank God You're Here.

No.

Yes, but a TV show.

So it doesn't.

Was he answering for you?

Yes, yeah.

That's a concern.

It's my, you know, I was like, just seeing Mark do so well.

I was like, yeah.

Went into the room

at a moment.

You probably haven't heard of this film, and I haven't watched all of it.

So I would just.

Did you go, is this like an SBS film?

I was looking forward to the

SBS film.

I didn't watch it on SBS.

Was it a foreign language film?

Yes.

Oh, man.

Italy.

No.

So can we guess the country and you'll tell us?

Spanish, yes.

Oh, yeah.

It sounds hot.

Sounds hot.

Yeah.

Yeah.

And we don't know the film.

I doubt it.

Oh, Coco.

Did you take it to Coco?

No.

All right, yeah.

Inside Out?

No.

Well, that's not in Spain.

So in San Francisco.

That has great Mexican food in San Francisco.

Yeah.

Where they speak Spanish?

Sleepless in Seattle.

Sleepless in Seattle?

No.

No, it's a foreign language Spanish food.

Spanish food.

What, they eat Spanish food in that movie?

Chef.

Chef.

That movie is sexy, but

for the food.

Is it a full narrative film or is it a series of short films stuck together?

Yes.

As far as I know, I'm looking it up now.

I don't know anything about this movie except that there was a VHS of it in my cupboard.

This is okay, really hard to get to it.

And I read about it in Empire magazine.

Can we ring Stan and just go, can you go check the videos you have?

He wouldn't know.

He wouldn't know.

Is the title of the film in Spanish?

Yeah.

Okay.

I don't know anything about it.

No, it's not.

No, it's not.

No, sorry.

No.

I was going to say, what Spanish words do you know?

All right.

Here's, I'm going to get

back your computer.

I just closed the thing.

I wasn't open.

No problem.

Go to his.

Paella.

Paella.

Paella?

Paella, no.

Paella.

It's not a Spanish word.

There's a Spanish name in there.

So, what.

But a foreign language film.

It's in Spanish.

It's a Spanish film from 2001.

This, I just looked this up.

9-11.

9-11, no.

No, no, no.

That's not got anything to do with it.

It's more or something that's not.

Fahrenheit, 9-11.

Fahrenheit, 9-11.

No.

Dude, where's my country?

No.

Sico.

It was Sex and Lucia.

Hmm.

Should have known.

It's in the name.

Lucia?

Maybe Lucia.

I don't know.

Lucia.

Lucia.

Lucia.

Sex and Lucia.

Lucia.

Lucia.

Lucia.

Okay, so we'll do this now.

I believe there was

the movie that Zach got off.

Do you want to sing along?

I don't know.

You sing.

You go I on Zach, all right?

What was the movie that Zach got off on?

Who?

Where?

What?

How?

I wonder what it was.

But we need to add in maybe.

I wonder what it be.

I wonder what it be.

Marvin, can you look up how to pronounce Lucia or Lucia?

I believe it's Lucia.

But is that because I would think that as well, but that's because I learned Italian in high school.

Is that a Spanish thing?

Well, I mean, I believe the languages have so many sounds

in common.

That's why I'm assuming.

But I honestly don't know.

But really, do we know anything?

What is knowledge?

Are you watching the the trailer for sex editions?

In other Spanish-speaking countries, Lucia, Lucia.

In Italy, in Italia, in Italian, in Italy, it is said as Lucia, Lucia.

Right, so despite the similarities in the languages.

They're more structural and

that's what I suspected.

So Lucia.

Lucia.

Luthea.

Sex and Lucia.

She blindfolded,

I remember.

But Lucia.

I had a scene with a shower head, I think.

Oh, sounds hot.

So Luthea was how they say it in Sexia.

Luthea.

What is the movie that Zach got off on?

Who, what, where, how?

It turns out it was the.

And then we say...

It turns out it was thee.

Sex and Luthea.

Why would we say thee?

I don't know.

Because it rhymes with B.

What?

Wait, give me the song again.

I think you need something that rhymes with the.

What is the movie that Zach slash I got off on?

Who, what, where, how?

What?

I wonder what it thee.

What?

I wonder what we could just do, I wonder what it be, and then we go, it was.

And then like that

segment.

Fine.

I don't get what.

Man, just trying to make this work.

I just thought I was on to something with.

I wanted to.

You want to try to rhyme with thea?

No, no.

No, no, no, no, no, no, wrong.

Because the old version ends with B.

He's trying to.

He's for some reason trying to keep

that rhyme,

which doesn't count.

Why don't you change it?

Get rid of the question.

Yeah.

And go, who, what,

where?

How.

Make, change that as well.

All right, I'm coming in with a pretty good one.

The options are between I Wonder What It B and I Wonder What It V.

Those are the only two options.

We're just discussing which is the better ones.

Don't just come in with a whole you're railroading.

I want to hear his pitch.

Oh, from the guy that ate a bowl of cereal and fucked off for a coffee.

This could be his reclaiming moment.

You get one moment to crawl your way.

One opportunity.

Sorry, I'm just a little distraught.

Mum spaghetti.

I'm talking about all those scenes from that sexy movie, Sex at Lithia.

Oh, I haven't seen in 20 years.

It sounds hot.

Play the trailer.

I don't see the trailer.

I don't have it.

Right after this point.

You can't get the trailer up.

Well, I don't have an oxyn or anything like that.

No, we'll just play it and we'll watch it.

Okay.

We'll talk about it.

It doesn't matter.

It doesn't have to.

Oh, it does.

It looks hot.

Yeah.

Yeah.

But give me your option.

Does it have.

I don't know.

It was more just a little bit of a damage.

Do you see images of

breasts?

No, penis.

Not in the trailer on YouTube.

I don't remember I mean this is like

sounds hot doesn't it

sounds like sounds like up

yeah

I joked it to up

did you is it just music

there's a woman drive the visuals there's a sexy woman swimming in a in the ocean

she's picked up by another man it's official sundance selection

12 nominations at the Spanish Goya Awards

there's a handsome long headed she's like can I talk to you

what's the film grain like

It's an interesting film green.

Yeah, yeah.

There's a brown grade to it.

A bit of green.

They loved a bit of shot.

I've always followed you.

I've always followed you.

In secret,

I've decided.

I'm completely in love with you.

I think we're giving a lot of 30-year-olds some SVS memories right now.

Broden, now's not the time to say that.

Oh, it's getting horny.

It's getting horny.

Oh, it is.

It's getting real horny.

Oh!

Horny.

So is it a fucking horse?

It's horny.

Is it a fucking horn?

It's a very horny.

My only memory of SBS Horror Felt at Knight is...

Oh, that's too horny.

I constantly come to it.

This is an image that is burnt into my brain and has been since I was a small child.

Maybe of 12 or 13.

Just turning on SPS.

And I don't know what movie this was.

And if you know in the comments, let us know.

It's just a big empty field and then some sort of either water tower, some sort of tower in the middle of an empty field.

There's a big wide shot.

It's an Italian film, I think.

And then it zooms and then it goes in close.

And then there are two naked people, a man and a woman, embracing, just kind of sitting on each other, embracing each other on top of the...

So if you're

not from...

If you're not from Australia, there's possibly an equivalent.

If you're not from Australia, if you're under 30, you probably don't quite know what we're talking about.

For those listening,

before porno and internet, well, porno was

you had to buy porno or find porno.

Yeah, or your uncle kept it in a garbage bag.

Find porno, buy porno.

What could it be?

There was a channel called SBS.

It's I don't know, but it'll lead to a stiffy.

Stiffy.

And SBS ostensibly was about playing foreign movies, but late at night they played sexy foreign movies.

So anyone over 30 kind of has memories of like very quietly in their room if they got a TV in their room or if their parents were out very quietly watching sitting through hours of depressing shit just to get to the sexy scene the MA sexy scene.

Yeah.

But Sex and Lithia that was like more, that was ah.

And on that note, Zach, do you have anything to say about eating cereal for the majority of this episode?

No, I worry I overshared my

teenager.

No, we've all been through it.

I've never been at all.

Yeah.

I just hope, I just haven't seen this movie in its entirety.

I just hope it's not a real weird movie.

Because once you popped, I guess you stopped.

Unlike Pringles,

this movie was almost the opposite of Pringles.

In some ways, this movie should have been called opposite of Pringles.

No, I think it was called Sex and Luthea because it was about Luthia's sexual awakening, and I think that was appropriate.

But once you popped, you stopped.

And that can't be underestimated, the power of that character.

Do you think the critics at Sundance were popping in that cinema?

I don't think they were.

It depends how many people left.

Pop later.

But then they didn't stop.

But they might have known.

But Zach, they may have known in the program, it may have said, once you pop, you will stop.

So they may have just waited for an appropriate time to pop.

That's true.

Thank you.

That's true.

Jesus.

This is the cereal episode.

Yeah, I had a bowl of cereal.

Sol Taire and

what was it uh solter and usaban

soltaire if you if you remember sex and lithia or you've seen it more recently uh hit us up hit me up or if you want to know one of the judges at sundance let me know we'd love to have you on letterboxed oh we come on letterboxed give us a review i want to know if you popped and stopped or if it stopped and then you popped or maybe you were a little more respectful to the filmmaker's intention unlike me a 12-year-old boy but you can't blame yourself for that mate we've all been there.

Yeah.

That's why SBS still exists.

Yeah.

I think it's there also for, like, I think their radio service does.

Yeah, they play

a title in the middle.

SBS stands.

Underfunded.

SBS stands for stop,

pop, and stop.

No, I think it stands for special broadcasting service because.

No, it stands for six billion stories.

No, it's

special broadcasting service.

Sexy boy service.

Special

broadcasting service.

Stop, bop, and stop.

That's it.

Bop and stop.

Their main point is like creating content for the migrant communities of Australia.

And horny stuff.

And they love the horny stuff, man.

Yeah.

Tell me, why was queer as folk up there?

That's not in another language.

That's just horny stuff.

Can you explain to me why they play scrubs every day now?

Do they, really?

Yeah.

Bring back the old word.

Bring back queer as folk.

Oh yeah, what did I just say?

You said queer as folk.

I thought I might have accidentally said queer eye for the straight guy.

No, channel 10.

No.

That was not horny.

That was just Carson Kresley.

Funniest thing to do.

If you ever want to laugh,

watching early 2000s queer as folk now.

Not queer as folk.

That's not funny.

Queer Eye for the Straight Guy Now is so funny because often they have a beard

Which is because if they're a bigger guy, that's the best thing they can do

You know, they might be a bit unkempt, but they might be wearing dungarees.

And then they look better by today's standards before

they shave off their beard and make them wear like a t-shirt and blazer.

Yeah.

And it's really funny to see them make them look more like a nerd.

Yeah, they take a schlub, they just put them in a coat.

That's pretty much it.

Take a schlub, put them in a coat.

I love that show.

Schlub coat.

Schlub.

The new one.

Slubs and coats.

New one.

I'm like, I like that coat.

Old one.

It's like schlub to nerd.

They're infighting.

There's infighting.

Oh, all about it.

All the drums.

I got the DL from someone when we were in LA.

They told me.

Oh, in the infighting.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Well,

I'm really sorry.

I thought this was going to be a serial adventure.

I had some cereal.

I had a serial adventure.

Not me.

And I'm starving in my tummy.

Yeah, I didn't get any cereal.

But maybe if you join us next week.

Next week or five to six weeks from now, depending on rollout rollout and schedule maybe we'll revisit the series because what i see can i tell you what i see right now i see two empty bowls and two hungry boys and a and and warm milk warm milk and a box with no cocoa pops well why well why don't you boys say what do you say to uh

turning off the microphones cracking open a couple of bags of uh i'm not i'm leaving as soon as i'm done here okay well we need we do need to do one more i believe yeah i'll do that one and then i'm done.

There's no, I'm not talking to you often.

What are you doing, you and I?

Chuck this TV on, a couple of bowls of Saltera and that's a brand,

chuck on sex and Luthea.

You know what?

That sounds to me

special K.

Oh, you didn't say that.

I mean, just right.

Sorry, that sounds just right.

Hey, you didn't say that you'd be watching Sex and Luthea.

Maybe I will join you.

And maybe this time, Zach will pop, but he won't stop.

Stop.

I'm not going to pop in front of you.

I'll watch the whole movie.

I'm a grown-up now.

Good on you.

Can you promise me you'll pop when you get home?

You've got a deal.

I was talking to Zach.

Will I pop when I get home?

At some point, yes.

But not

a deal.

Wait.

Will it be connected to sex and lithia?

No, probably not.

You know what?

In the spirit of...

Cereal and the cereal podcast and everyone getting a nice full tummy full of milk and cereal, I'm going to let that one slide.

And I'm not going to fucking take it personally because that was a rude fucking thing.

What did I say?

That was rude.

What about that was rude?

What do you ever fucking speak to me?

What the fuck about that was rude?

What did you ever fucking speak to me like that again?

Sorry.

I will fucking

understand.

Folks, you've seen a very brief window opening.

I've true marketing.

I've forgotten.

To be honest.

I just said I wasn't going to jerk it.

I just, my brain just moved.

I felt something happen in my brain and I...

lost time a bit there.

So I apologise if I did anything in the last couple of moments.

But I can't be held accountable for it.

You have done bad things to me.

Can we wrap up this episode?

Thank you so much for listening to this week.

And maybe treat yourself to some cereal on the way to work today.

Yeah, and much like a small packet.

I wrapped it up.

I've got a really good wrap-up.

Much like a small packet of cereal in a Kellogg's variety pack of assorted cereals, this podcast is wrapped up.

And I will say,

you know, in a world of pornography and instant gratification, maybe there is a little bit of space for the erotic drama after all.

Yes.

And eight different serials to have with it.

Yeah, and maybe.

And

the erotic drama.

And much like

Zach popped and stopped, he had Coco Pops.

You're talking to the mic?

Yep.

And that felt.

And that to me felt just right.

Because I can neutragrain your.

Because you're special, okay?

And you've got a crazy sultana brain.

And I can

grain it.

Brain.

Can we wrap this up?

And much like a packet of cereal in a Calloggs variety pack, assorted cereals, between 25 and 40 grams, this podcast is all wrapped up.

I think we should take this episode.

Take the recording because we've done it now.

Burn it.

Send it to Kellogg's.

Oh.

And say, hey,

we've already made the the content.

Would you be interested in sponsoring it?

Give us 50 grand.

But cut the stuff about jerking it.

We send that to SBS.

You send that to SBS.

They will give us $6 billion.

They are cashed up.

Good night, everyone.

And thank you for,

and good morning, because this was a breakfast podcast.

So we'll see you.

That sound is clapping.

Yeah,

important to say today.

I'm not jerking it.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

All right.

Do you want to wrap it up?

Yeah.

Go for it.

We're done.

You've been listening to the Auntie Donner podcast.

Thanks for joining us for another rip episode brought to you by Auntie DonnerClub.com.

See you next week.

Listener.