121. Why You Can't Let Them Go- The Hidden Attachment

Speaker 1 Even though severe cases can be rare, respiratory syncytial virus or RSV is still the leading cause of hospitalization in babies under one.

Speaker 1 RSV often begins like a cold or the flu, but can quickly spread to your baby's lungs. Ask your doctor about preventative antibodies for your baby this season and visit protectagainstrsv.com.

Speaker 1 The information presented is for general educational purposes only. Please ask your healthcare provider about any questions regarding your health or your baby's health.

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Speaker 1 Bifortis is a prescription medicine used to help prevent serious lung disease caused by RSV or respiratory syncytial virus in babies under age one born during or entering their first RSV season and children up to 24 months who remain at risk of severe RSV RSV disease through their second RSV season.

Speaker 1 Your baby shouldn't receive Baportis if they have a history of serious allergic reactions to Baphortis, nursevimab ALIP, or any of its ingredients.

Speaker 1 Tell your baby's doctor about any medicines they're taking and all their medical conditions, including bleeding or bruising problems. Serious allergic reactions have happened.

Speaker 1 Get medical help right away if your child has any of the following signs or symptoms of a serious allergic reaction, such as swelling of the face, mouth, or tongue, difficulty swallowing or breathing, unresponsiveness, bluish color of skin, lips, or underfingernails, muscle weakness, severe rash, hives, or itching.

Speaker 1 Most common side effects include rash and pain, swelling, or hardness at their injection site. Individual results may vary.
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Speaker 2 Okay, I'm excited for this episode. Hi, friends.
I changed locations. I'm sitting on the couch.
Honestly, I'm tired of sitting at that desk. I'm over it.

Speaker 2 I feel like a whole new person, so let's just do the whole new everything. I love this.
I feel like we're just hanging out on the couch.

Speaker 2 But this week, I'm going to tell you how to let people go from what I've learned and what I've experienced.

Speaker 2 And I'm going to hit on a lot of the weird feeling states, like the whole logically knowing you're done with someone and why it can't work, but you feel like you're still stuck on them and you can't let them go.

Speaker 2 I'm going to tell you what I've learned about that. And also at the end, I'm going to talk about resentment and how to let people go and move forward without resentment.

Speaker 2 And one thing I cracked recently that I'm going to tell you about is that feeling of like, how can you live without me?

Speaker 2 Like the frustration of just like not understanding how like you can do so much for someone. Like how you can treat them so well and love them so much.

Speaker 2 And they're able to just walk away without having that. Like, I'm going to get to it.
But that's a big one that I finally cracked. So let's just jump into this.

Speaker 2 The first thing I want to share that helps me a lot is sometimes people's purpose in your life is served. Sometimes it's done.

Speaker 2 They came in, they fucked up what they needed to fuck up, or they made you aware of certain things, they changed your life, they triggered you to make new changes, whatever it is. Who cares?

Speaker 2 We're focused on the point of letting them go. Sometimes people's purpose in your life has been served, and it is time to let them go.
It always sucks to lose people.

Speaker 2 It always is going to hurt, whether it's friendship, relationship, family.

Speaker 2 anything but that is part of this life is something we all go through but losing people is going to be heightened for you and happen a lot faster and a lot more often when you change and grow a lot lot because you're going to outgrow people not in a negative way.

Speaker 2 You might just grow apart. You're both growing, but it's not in the same direction.

Speaker 2 But with saying people's purpose in your life is served, is sometimes it comes to a point where it doesn't make sense for you to stay with someone or to be friends with someone anymore.

Speaker 2 Like their presence in your life doesn't make sense anymore. You know, those friends I'm talking about or the people that you're dating that I'm talking about.

Speaker 2 Sometimes it's just like very clear that your presence in my life no longer makes sense and that's a sign their purpose is served and they're meant to make their way out whether it's by you doing it or them doing it you know when it's time for them to go now let me tell you the things that have helped me feel better about this because it does hurt but here's how to make it not hurt like what to flip in your head Okay, so when you logically know someone's not for you or you don't want them, but the way you feel doesn't change, like when you logically can convince yourself and see this person is not what I I want.

Speaker 2 They do not have a space in my life, whatever, but you still feel stuck on them. My first piece of advice is stop trying to fight and prove the pain that you're in.
You're hurt and that's it.

Speaker 2 It's not up for discussion. And a lot of people get trapped in this when it's a situationship or something was only a couple of months and you're like, why the fuck should it hurt this bad?

Speaker 2 Why did it hurt this bad? A lot of people will say, oh, it hurts so bad because I loved them so much. That's not always the case.

Speaker 2 How bad something hurts you is not in proportion to how much you loved it or cared about it. So don't make that misjudgment.
Sometimes it is, most of the times it's not.

Speaker 2 Shit can hurt, even if it makes no logical sense, but don't make it mean I just love them so much. That's why it hurts this bad.
That's not the case.

Speaker 2 And another situation that this feeling stuck on somebody, we're about to get into a real big like subconscious game that goes on, but another thing that can hurt is with the betrayal aspect.

Speaker 2 And you see someone is not who you thought they were. You are still allowed to be hurt.

Speaker 2 Even if the person you thought you cared about didn't really exist, they were putting on an image or who they really are came out.

Speaker 2 The love and the care that you had was for the person that you thought existed. They were very real to you.

Speaker 2 Now that the curtain is ripped open and you see who they really are, or they've betrayed you in a way that reveals they never cared like you thought, or they just painted a whole false image.

Speaker 2 You You still cared, and you're still allowed to be hurt. First thing is just address the fact that you're hurt, and that's it.

Speaker 2 Because you're gonna get caught trying to prove it to yourself and logic your way into, well, this, this, and this happened. So it does make sense that I'm hurt.

Speaker 2 Stop looking for justification for why you're allowed to feel hurt and look at it. You're hurt.
And that's enough. You don't need to fight for it.
You don't need to prove it.

Speaker 2 Just face it and say that you're hurt. Don't judge it.

Speaker 2 I'm a weak bitch i'm this i'm that it only was a month why does it hurt it doesn't matter all we need to focus on here is it hurts so the biggest thing that i realized around feeling stuck on somebody that you logically know ain't

Speaker 2 is it's a subconscious game and it's a trap you can get stuck in what you're actually stuck on

Speaker 2 is the jealousy you feel for why they were worth your love

Speaker 2 because you don't feel worth it. Typically, when you have a big heart and you love hard, you love people the exact way you wish someone would love you.

Speaker 2 And if you notice you constantly are nitpicking them and discrediting them or you're looking them up and being like, God damn, they're ugly. Or you're just attacking them and nitpicking them.

Speaker 2 This is kind of what's going on. When you play the nitpick game, it's the comparison game and it's a jealousy thing.

Speaker 2 You're jealous of the love you gave them because you're trying to figure out why were they worth it, but I wasn't but you need to see the love that you're jealous they got came from you but subconsciously you can get caught up thinking that you just are disgusted by this person but you can't stop thinking about them and you can't stop critiquing them what you're really doing subconsciously is trying to prove that they weren't worth it so you feel better so you feel worth it you are worth the fucking love you gave them don't get trapped in this whole thing and become aware of what's going on in your subconscious you're not jealous of them you don't actually hate them you're not nitpicking them you cared for them even if you look at them like they're fucking ugly now you didn't think they were ugly at one point it's not about them it's about you and the love you gave them what you have to see is it's not one over the other you love this person the way you wish you could have been loved you're the one in control of that your focus needs to go on you get your focus off of them and how they're a piece of shit and they're actually ugly and they're all this and that quit critiquing them because it's just an attempt to discredit them so you feel better so you feel worth the love you're mad that you loved them the way that you did you're mad that you cared the way that you did and the only reason you're mad that you did is because you don't love yourself that way that's the real issue here And I did just do a podcast episode about how to fall in love with yourself.

Speaker 2 It's episode 119. So go listen to that or watch that if you like it on YouTube.
If you want to figure out how to turn that love toward you.

Speaker 2 And I really think just me saying this is going to make you aware of a lot. If it didn't make sense yet, this is about to just unlock deeper.
We're just going to keep going.

Speaker 2 I have a full list of shit to get into.

Speaker 2 But my whole point with bringing that up is when you can logically see something is not what you want and you constantly feel the need to remind yourself of it, there's something else going on there.

Speaker 2 And that's what I wanted to point out is the jealousy. And it's not jealousy over who they are.
Because you logically can see they ain't shit. They wasn't worth it.

Speaker 2 But you gave love to someone who wasn't worth it, and now it's making you question, why was I not worth it? Because if I gave it to them and I saw them as worth it, they're actually fucking not.

Speaker 2 That's what you're jealous about. Okay, the next thing I'm going to talk about is the frustration of how the fuck can you live without me? That's a big one for me.

Speaker 2 But I remember at times feeling very like

Speaker 2 just shell-shocked, like so confused. How are you able to move forward and live life without me? Like, I just couldn't stop saying that.

Speaker 2 Like, even if I cut them off, I would still just be like, how are you okay? How are you not deteriorating? You know what I mean? Like, that frustration kind of confused me for a long, long time.

Speaker 2 And it didn't make any sense. I just kept saying, how the fuck can you live without me?

Speaker 2 And the thing that I discovered with this is when you keep asking yourself that question, how the fuck can you function without me? What it reveals, you can't function without you.

Speaker 2 you've abandoned yourself completely you're still trapped and stuck with your focus on them and it's hard for you to continue forward every day and you're over here thinking it's about them how can you live without me you're experiencing having to live without you that's why it's making you question it because you see how bad you feel you see how hard things are and you see them maybe just going on and living about life and you can't fathom how are you able to function because you're unable to function right now but this is why you're caught up asking that question and it's because you're seeing how you can't function without you but this is real deep it's all about self-abandonment and the way

Speaker 2 that you kind of throw yourself away in a relationship to be there for someone else or be what someone else wants you to be you throw pieces of yourself away basically in the relationship if you're dealing with this you gave them you

Speaker 2 And they left with you.

Speaker 2 And what I mean by you gave them you is you destroyed yourself to be what they needed and to be what they wanted and left yourself with nothing. You neglected yourself.

Speaker 2 You damaged yourself to be what they needed and be there for them. So you gave them all the best parts of you.
But what I want you to see is they did not walk off with them.

Speaker 2 And you feel like you don't have you and you don't have the parts of you that you threw away. They didn't leave with them.
They're still with you. You've just pushed yourself away from them.

Speaker 2 You've pushed them away because you need it to be a certain way for them. This is going to be a time period of coming back to yourself, like a breakup or a situation with letting someone go.

Speaker 2 You cannot let someone go until you grab the parts of you that you threw away for them and the parts of you that you literally destroyed to be what they wanted.

Speaker 2 So going through a big period of self-discovery is going to happen. And I really encourage some isolation, like a good nice isolation period.

Speaker 2 Now, the next thing I want to talk about is when you give a lot and you kind of put up with a lot and you choose to love them and try and be there for them and comfort them and you kind of figure out who's hurt them, how have they been hurt?

Speaker 2 And you want to heal them and have them experience the opposite of what's hurt them before.

Speaker 2 You see their insecurities and you want to support them and make them feel appreciated so they no longer have those. You want to heal their insecurities.

Speaker 2 You want to heal anything you see that's hurting them and help them see themselves different and help them grow and help them blossom.

Speaker 2 When you are in this mode and you're overlooking things, this is a part of discarding yourself and pushing yourself away.

Speaker 2 The parts of you that don't like what this person is, you just overlooking it is having to push yourself away. You're having to bargain away a piece of yourself to stay with this person.

Speaker 2 But when you're on a mission like this to try and heal someone, you'll overlook everything because you're convinced that your love will change the things about them.

Speaker 2 You're convinced that you can heal them with your love and

Speaker 2 make them become everything you want.

Speaker 2 Not in a selfish way, but just help them grow and blossom and see that as an avenue of like, I know I don't like them how they are right now or they're not up to my certain standards, but if I heal them and if I love them good enough and if I do what I need to do and support them and foster them, they'll grow and then we'll be perfect.

Speaker 2 This is another subconscious kind of thing you can get stuck in without realizing.

Speaker 2 But what I want you to see is what you're trying to do is give them your life force and basically pour into them to grow them and heal them and help them.

Speaker 2 That's another thing I was talking about with the jealousy of the love that you gave them.

Speaker 2 When you try to pour your life force into somebody, you're looking for the validation of yourself of how powerful it is and how great it is.

Speaker 2 It's a weird little subconscious thing, But you're not delusional for thinking that your love is this powerful and you can fully like heal somebody and help them tremendously.

Speaker 2 Because if you met someone like you and you were loved by someone like you, like if you made an exact clone of everything that you are and you got to be in a relationship with that, it would heal you completely.

Speaker 2 It would heal you fucking completely. So it makes sense why

Speaker 2 you feel like your love is very special and you want to give it to them. You want to heal them through it.
But there's a lot more things at play than just throwing love at somebody and helping them.

Speaker 2 If you were loved by someone just like you, it would heal everything about you. You would literally be a pig in shit.
You'd be in such bliss to like have the best friend, have the partner.

Speaker 2 It's like just to have you and to be loved the way that you loved by you, the trust you would feel, the relief you would feel, it makes sense.

Speaker 2 Don't subconsciously be trying to go give this shit to other people.

Speaker 2 Because when you try and do this, and basically law of attraction talk, love yourself through someone else and heal them like an external, it's like a mirror.

Speaker 2 Like you think loving them this much is gonna like do something for you.

Speaker 2 If you can find and accept all their flaws and all their things, it's like an accepting thing that kind of pours back onto you, but sometimes it doesn't.

Speaker 2 But a big reason you're gonna feel stuck on somebody is if this didn't work.

Speaker 2 if the love that you gave them and the life force you literally tried to give them wasn't appreciated or was rejected a lot of people can't handle a love like that they're not a vibrational match to it like they will literally repel it and not be able to accept it and they'll take it as an attack you can't try and go take the love that would heal you and give it to somebody else it's not going to work and when it doesn't work you're going to be left to question it you're gonna try and go give this life force to something you're gonna be reflected that it's useless and you're gonna start to question it so now you're left without the love you want so bad and now you're questioning if it's even that valuable so now you're really not going to give it to yourself like i said before whole self-discovery thing is going to go nuts but like i said just imagine you met you and you were loved by someone just like you the relief you'd feel and the the just bliss

Speaker 2 that would be.

Speaker 2 Literally just sit with that for a second because it's going to wipe out any questioning you have to if the love you have to give is actually valuable or not.

Speaker 2 But what's really keeping you stuck to them with a situation like this is you are questioning yourself.

Speaker 2 That's that's the issue there. You're not questioning them.
Okay, the next thing is something I've talked about before is some people are only great because they're not yours.

Speaker 2 and i know that fucking sucks and it don't feel good to hear but i tell the truth it hurts me too but like there's no avoiding it and it's the truth sometimes sometimes people are only special because they're not yours because what they would have to conform to and change to to be able to be with you, be friends with you, or date you, whatever it is, what they would have to change about themselves would ruin what makes them special.

Speaker 2 There's someone that's going to have to be appreciated in a different outlook, either just from afar or it might be a person that you want to date but you couldn't because it would ruin what's so special about them so you have to keep them in a friendship slot instead of advancing into a relationship type thing but that's just one thing to get that's going to help you let people go you don't want to ruin what makes someone special just to make it yours sometimes you got to let it go and

Speaker 2 go let them be special and not have to change them and diminish them because you want to have them because you want to date them you wouldn't want someone to do that to you so don't do that to anybody else.

Speaker 2 You wouldn't want someone to look at you and see what's so great about you, but be like, yeah, you're going to have to change that because I want to date you. So change that.

Speaker 2 Get rid of all that shit because I don't want to deal with it. I don't want to handle it.
So sometimes you just have to let people go because you take away what makes them special.

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Speaker 2 Now, the next thing I want to talk about is more related to a relationship type B.

Speaker 2 If you tried to date somebody and make it work or whatever happened and you just can't let it go and you're like clinging to it, there was no love to be found. There was no love to be shared.

Speaker 2 There was no love to be created. If you guys tried, you guys tried.
Sometimes you just got to accept that. And it's going to help you feel better about accepting it to let it go.

Speaker 2 It doesn't mean something's wrong with you or something's wrong with them. There was no love to be created.
Unfortunately. And it's allowed to hurt.
Like I talked about before. It's allowed to hurt.

Speaker 2 But what are you going to do? Keep freaking out keep fixating on it? Or are you just going to be like, okay, that makes sense? There was no love to be be found.

Speaker 2 So I'm going to quit digging for water in this hole that's dry in the middle of the desert.

Speaker 2 There's no water to be found, babe. Stop trying to beat up the hole.
Stop trying to find out what's wrong with the hole in the ground. There's no water in it.
You need water.

Speaker 2 Go find it somewhere else. Let's elaborate on that a little bit.
I just got a nice visual.

Speaker 2 Like for you to be looking for like a little water well and you find a little hole in the ground and it's dry, you're never going to regret looking at it, seeing it's dry, there's no love to be found, getting up and walking off.

Speaker 2 You're going to regret sitting there trying to dig it up and figure out where the water is, how to make water come into it. You're going to be trying to figure out how to make it fill up with water.

Speaker 2 You're going to be so fixated on why is this not what I want it to be?

Speaker 2 But one day when you finally realize, lunatic, that you're trying to like fix this hole in the ground, like this well, you're trying to figure out why it doesn't have water.

Speaker 2 You're going to realize one day you're so emotionally starved and you're so thirsty that you're going to realize all this time you spent trying to figure out what was wrong with it is a waste.

Speaker 2 And you're going to start questioning yourself because you put so much into that when you could have just got up and went and directly trying to find some love, some water, another well.

Speaker 2 You're going to question the way that you acted when you didn't just accept it for what it is. It's a drought.
It's a dry pocket. There's no water there.
Keep it moving.

Speaker 2 But I can relate this to questioning yourself when someone lacks effort. Oh my God.
Okay, let's go into this one. This is going to hurt people's feelings.
I'm sorry. I love you.

Speaker 2 I'm saying this to look out for you. If someone just seems to lack effort and they don't seem interested in you,

Speaker 2 they're not.

Speaker 2 And the reason I want you to just accept like the dry pocket in the desert that you want water to be in. There's no water in it.
The person does not like you.

Speaker 2 And you can try and sit there and flip it and understand it and think of anything you can and endure it and communicate and all this and that.

Speaker 2 But there comes a point where you just got to face the fact that the motherfucker's dry. There's no water to be found.
But I want you, as soon as you realize it's dry, to leave.

Speaker 2 get

Speaker 2 out because these are mistakes I've made in the past.

Speaker 2 When you see it's a drought and you keep trying to make it be what you want it to be, you keep wanting this person to like you, you keep trying to do anything you can to get the attention that you want.

Speaker 2 You better be the one to see this is a drought and you be the one to walk away. because it is just going to damage the living shit out of you.

Speaker 2 If you see this person who had nothing to give you and just seemed like they lacked effort and made all these excuses, if they leave you and go get with someone they actually like and you have to see all the effort just flow so freely to this new person, it's going to make you question

Speaker 2 everything about yourself. Why wasn't I good enough? Why do they get this? Why do they get that? You're going to make it a problem about you.

Speaker 2 So stop trying to make the dry well run water. Because when it comes to people, they just don't like you.

Speaker 2 Do not put yourself in the position to be left and then see the effort be put into someone else. That's a literal tragedy and it is going to ruin you mentally and emotionally.

Speaker 2 So I want your ass to leave. You be the one to leave because taking on the pain of seeing this is a well with no water.
I'm going to choose to walk away is such a small pain

Speaker 2 compared. to exhausting yourself and ruining yourself trying to make this dry well run water and for somebody else to walk up to it and it just starts flowing and only to them.

Speaker 2 That's going to wreck you and ruin you. When you realize there's no love to be found, when they actually don't like you, you can't get some effort or the love is not reciprocated, walk the fuck

Speaker 2 off.

Speaker 2 From the bottom of my heart, I'm looking out for you. I'm trying to protect you from the damage it's going to cause to you to question yourself like that.

Speaker 2 If they lack effort, they don't like you, run.

Speaker 2 Now, I want to talk about feeling infected with the pain that you feel with the loss of someone and wishing you never met them because who you were before didn't have this pain.

Speaker 2 And now you just feel this pain since things ended and you have to let them go, or you're about to let them go, and you just feel infected with that hurt, and it won't go away, and you don't know what to do with it.

Speaker 2 What I want you to see is this pain has a purpose, purpose and it will go away. So use it while it's here.
It feels like it's never going to go away. You're going to doubt.

Speaker 2 You're going to be like, yeah, Leo, you fully shit. No, I'm not.
It's got a purpose. So use it.

Speaker 2 Use the hurt. Take this pain.
and make it worth something because you're stuck with it. You're already feeling it.
You don't feel a way to get out of it.

Speaker 2 You don't see any way to fix it or get rid of it. Use it.
Take this pain because it's going to go away.

Speaker 2 And this is a real good boost you got this is when some of the best masterpieces and the best transformations happen for everything

Speaker 2 so i want you to use the resentment use the rage use the hurt use the pain to do everything you can for yourself come back to yourself work on yourself change your whole fucking life anything you've ever wanted to do go do it take some risks do what you need to for the betterment of yourself and just goddamn go for it and the anger use that too use the resentment use the anger use all of it level yourself up and become someone who would have never been with the person who hurt you like this you want to level up past them and you're going to use the hurt you feel from them to do it you're going to literally supersede them and get the fuck out of any caliber they could access you want to literally take this pain and use it because as you use it as you tap into it as you're using it to benefit yourself all the clarity is going to come.

Speaker 2 It's not going to be easy by any means, but this is a big fucking opportunity right now. It is a very, very big opportunity for you.
And I want you to see it because it's going to transmute.

Speaker 2 It's going to flip. It's going to change.
You're going to get clarity. All the anger is going to go away.
It's going to fall. You're going to feel more peace than ever.

Speaker 2 All the resentment is going to fall. All the pain is going to fall.
But you have to build yourself into something it can fall from.

Speaker 2 So take this goddamn pain because very soon, literally way sooner than you think, you're going to see why every piece fell for you the way that it did.

Speaker 2 And you're going to look back and be like, oh, tea.

Speaker 2 All right, now I want to talk about letting go without the resentment because

Speaker 2 that shit's strong.

Speaker 2 So I've been exploring my relationship to God a lot recently, but I've been kind of using the term God to lay it over my relationship with the universe and all of my thoughts and beliefs and everything I know about it to personify it when I need to.

Speaker 2 But from any understanding you have of the universe, God, your soul, we all come from the same consciousness and energy. We're all a part of it.
So you are a piece of God.

Speaker 2 You're a piece of the universe. I use God, like I said, to humanize it a little bit because it's all going to make sense in a second.
But if you're a piece of it,

Speaker 2 everything

Speaker 2 that's happening,

Speaker 2 God is doing to himself. The universe is doing to itself.

Speaker 2 When you take on this perspective, you're going to see the people in your life as vessels why did god come to you and visit itself the way that it did what was it trying to teach you what was it trying to teach itself tapping into this perspective literally changed so much for me but just understanding the person is a vessel for you being visited by god or the universe to become aware of things

Speaker 2 what was it trying to teach you why would god visit you through that vessel No matter what it is, just taking on that perspective will give you a whole new life form of understanding of things you never even thought of.

Speaker 2 And you're going to see things a lot different. And if you got abused and hurt, why

Speaker 2 did God do that to himself? Why did the universe do that to itself? Why did it visit itself through that? And why were you a match to it? Why was I am matched to this vessel?

Speaker 2 That alone has saved my life a lot like with so many different aspects just anytime you're frustrated with some shit god why are you visiting me like that why are you visiting yourself like that you can use the universe you can use god but like i said i use god to humanize it because i feel like i can understand it better when i do that but it's just the universe with a different name now the next part with resentment i want to talk about i really want a cigarette right now oh my god this is a lot

Speaker 2 If you just feel resentful as hell, what you really resent a lot of the times is yourself. When the resentment just don't die and don't go away, the resentment is to you.

Speaker 2 And a lot of people will be a distraction and you'll think it's about them. Really,

Speaker 2 look at the resentment you feel towards people. Is it towards you?

Speaker 2 Sometimes it's fully against them, but what I'm saying is just a different perspective around the resentment you have of someone you're dating. What do you resent?

Speaker 2 yourself for you might see things different

Speaker 2 where you made certain decisions and you chose to put up with certain shit and

Speaker 2 you did it lovingly and you did it because you were just trying to love someone but at the end of the day you caused damage and they didn't change they didn't suffer you feel like you're the only one that suffered sometimes when you think about certain stuff and the resentment is toward yourself for letting yourself do that for enduring suffering for someone and feeling like it's for nothing.

Speaker 2 The resentment's for you a lot of the time.

Speaker 2 So the reality with a lot of things like this like i said people are distractions they're a distraction a lot of the time with resentment but also things that you're questioning about yourself so like i talked about with the vessel thing why did god need to come visit itself like this were you questioning things and were you not so certain about certain

Speaker 2 because when you met with this vessel and this messenger it's basically like the universe getting real loud with you it's like god being like wake up story time

Speaker 2 if you get that reference you get the reference. But the universe got rough with you if it needed to hurt you to wake you up.
Universe got real rough with you.

Speaker 2 But if you were questioning anything before you were matched to this person, you were a match to them to question it 10 times harder. So the resentment you feel, question it.

Speaker 2 Try to understand your resentment. Is it at them or is it at yourself? Is half on them? Is half on you?

Speaker 2 But the biggest thing is becoming aware of the resentment you actually have toward yourself and figuring out what it's about and what you can do differently moving forward to let go of it.

Speaker 2 Because it's not just something you can like, poof, get rid of. You can with some of it, but a lot of resentment you got to fix.
It's like an I'm sorry. I'm sorry don't mean shit.

Speaker 2 You got to show changed behavior to actually understand someone is sorry because they've shown changed behavior.

Speaker 2 When you resent yourself for stuff, changing the behavior and not allowing certain things any further or allowing things again is what's going to help you drop it.

Speaker 2 Basically, look at how you could have avoided the pain that you were caused and the pain that you feel.

Speaker 2 And there's going to be little things and you're going to be pissed off at yourself. But also evaluate, is it fair? Is it fair to be mad at yourself for that? Did you know?

Speaker 2 Did you know it was going to happen because you made certain decisions? You can't beat yourself up. Just look to understand the resentment.

Speaker 2 But my whole point with bringing up the resentment being at you, some of it might be. And you might not realize.
You just think it's about them.

Speaker 2 And you just keep focusing on them and thinking about them because you think it's about them. Baby, sometimes the call come from inside a house.

Speaker 2 So to end this off, I'm going to give you the question that helps me so much with letting people go. It's like that one last final fucking hoobra for the little feelings I had for you.

Speaker 2 If you met this person now,

Speaker 2 who you are now, and you've had no experience or time invested with them, if you could just look at the person, if you met them now,

Speaker 2 Would you still be friends with them or would you still date them? Looking at them objectively, just looking at them them as a person. If you met them now,

Speaker 2 would you still go forward with it? Would you still want them in your life? Or would you not? Or would you still have pursued that relationship? Would you have still pursued it?

Speaker 2 Because that's going to help you realize and kind of release a little resistance to thinking you want it so bad.

Speaker 2 But if you kind of scratch that and you just look at objectively who they are, who you are, would you go for them? Would you try and date them?

Speaker 2 If not, it's time to take that that pain like i said earlier take that

Speaker 2 and use it it's got a purpose not let it be here to serve it if this episode helped you leave me a comment and let me know i'd love to hear from you guys but also i'm going back on tour so if you struggle with confidence self-acceptance self-love in any regard i've got you because i've gone from cripplingly insecure to confident back down

Speaker 2 And now the confidence I have is just a quiet, still confidence.

Speaker 2 And I've really dissected everything I've kind of went through and learned and I thought I knew about confidence before baby is 10 times better and it's a lot deeper it's a lot different and the knowledge that I'm going to share and the way that I'm going to lay things is not something I can have on the internet I'm going to try and record the last show of the tour and post it but I like to be able to talk very freely and about deep dark things like unaliving and really taking it full circle to pull out the confidence that's in you, helping you see it all, extract it from what you've been through, reposition it, and then like stick it into you.

Speaker 2 It's a big thing, it's a very, very life-changing event for everyone there and also me. And I love feeling the energy shift in the room.

Speaker 2 But with that being said, if you want to get a ticket, there's also tickets for me and greets. The link will be in the description of this episode or video if you're watching on YouTube.

Speaker 2 If you're watching on YouTube, give it a thumbs up. And if you're listening to it, give me five stars rating.
But I'm so goddamn excited to come share what I've learned on tour.

Speaker 2 I'm like sharing new things in the podcast, but what I'm gonna share on stage, ah, I can't wait.

Speaker 2 I will also put all of my social medias in the description if you want to keep up with me, see what I'm doing. But that is all I've got for this week.

Speaker 2 So, everybody, be safe, take care of yourself, and I'll talk to you guys next Sunday.