Marrying The “Freak”, Getting Put In The Dog House, & Telling Him Your Bedroom List | Truth After Dark

This is an iHeart podcast.

Heads up, California.

There's a statewide special election November 4th.

Active registered voters will receive a vote-by-mail ballot that can be returned at a drop-off location in person or by mail.

Rest assured, your vote is secure.

You can even sign up to track your ballot.

Your vote is your voice.

Use it.

Don't delay.

Vote right away.

Get more information or check your voter status at sos.ca.gov.

A message from the California Secretary of State.

Downy rinse fights stubborn odors in just one wash.

When impossible odors get stuck in,

the media said that Paul Pierce got arrested from suspicion of a DUI.

Do you have something that you want to say about that?

Man.

Corinne Steffens, a superhead, she went on.

That's crazy to have that type of nickname.

Right.

Mary the hoe, meaning like men should marry whores.

Come on now.

Is she married?

No.

There we go.

Why is she not married then?

A woman has to figure out how long

the doghouse has to last.

Yeah, go ahead.

We hate like when we're in the doghouse and then y'all, you know, we get it cracking at night.

Okay, it just be one of them nights.

Yeah.

Like, damn.

And so he think he back good.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

And then, like, you know, a day or two later, he try to get it back cracking and you off.

Yeah.

Like, damn, what was we just like?

We just cool?

Like, we're not cool now?

Cam Newton.

Let me make sure I do not misquote him.

He said that he needs the list of his girls' partners that she slept with, period.

The names.

You know, your list is probably crazy.

It's not.

The disrespectful

out of control.

Here, I'm going to send you.

I'm going to fax you these because I don't want you to see.

No.

Actually, my list is not crazy.

Thank you.

Her

No, it's not.

This is the taking over the game.

All right, everybody.

Welcome to Truth After Dark.

Do you think that men or women are more toxic?

Hello to all the beautiful people out there.

You are watching the Truth After Dark.

Thank you for joining us and continuing to support us.

I am your host, Azar Faraday.

And your boy, Truth in the Building.

In the building.

So today we're going to start with a few current events.

The first, most pressing one is that the media said that Paul Pierce got arrested from suspicion of a DUI.

Do you have something that you want to say about that?

Man.

Driving, stuck in traffic.

Cars wasn't moving.

Right.

I'm like, dang, I'm like, past my bedtime.

Right.

I'm like, you know, I'm at nine o'clock bedtime.

For sure.

I'm nine o'clock.

It was like 10.30.

I'm sitting in there like,

man.

Kind of leaned back like it ain't gonna never end.

Like it was non-moving.

I never even seen non-moving.

At least you're gonna inch, you know.

I just closed my eyes and then it was, man, I can't put myself in that situation though.

You know, when you close your eyes, no, I'm not driving.

Well, you weren't driving.

No, I wasn't.

I put it in park.

Actually, I put it in park because you were sitting there so long.

It was like 45 minutes you was sitting there.

Yeah, yeah, I know.

And it was just like, damn, I didn't think it was ever going to end.

I thought somebody had died on the freeway or something.

I thought it was a bad situation.

So I didn't know how long it was going to be there.

But

yeah, stuff happened.

And then, you know,

I had my day in court.

Yeah, for sure.

I get it.

I would fall asleep too, 45 minutes sitting somewhere past my bedtime.

I'm for sure knocking the fuck out.

I'm gonna tell you that right now.

That's crazy.

I'm sorry that happened to you.

That's wild, but

you know,

the truth will prevail, period.

The name speaks for itself, the motherfucking truth.

But I'm glad you're good and you're in good spirits, and everything is going to be all right, period.

Yep.

All right.

Well, moving on from that, we're going to get into some other hot topics.

Um, so Corinne Steffens, a superhead, she went on.

That's crazy to have that type of nickname.

Right.

So,

she went on actually one of my friends' podcasts, and she has a clip that's going viral.

And she said, Marry the hoe, meaning like men should marry whores because they really want to be with whores, but instead, they feel like they are supposed to be with like the good girl, the virgin, the girl who's like composed and put together.

But then they cheat on her with the whore.

whore

so she's like just marry the whore and stop playing around acting like whores don't get cheated on either come on now is she married no

there we go why why she not married then because she's just trying to promote that you know what I remember her from the early 2000s you know writing a book or something or

getting around she wrote like a tell-all of all the men she had sex with or whatever trying to get back relevant and everything man nobody Nobody messing with her, man.

Come on, man.

And Lil Wayne, and you know what's so crazy that she says this?

She was in a relationship, whether I don't know if she was married or not, but she said that no matter what relationship that she was in, married or not, if Lil Wayne calls, she's leaving and she's going to go fucking suck him.

Girl, who wants that?

I'm so confused.

That's why men don't want to marry a hoe because once a hoe, always a hoe, baby.

And you're going to turn around and go fucking suck the next person.

And that's crazy.

Yeah,

she's trying to spark some interest, but that ain't it.

You know, she needs to, she cooked.

Well, she was saying that what a hoe will give you is better than what like a household will give you.

I will tell you this about like

women who are considered hoes

and men that like them.

Men like

that

for just so long.

You know what I'm saying?

But, you know, like

when you look at the longevity of somebody you want somebody that is more than that like come on now like just because sex is cool and you doing all these things that a man like that don't mean that's gonna last forever like when it get down to like sitting around and really bringing some substance to the table and really bringing like

some maturity bringing like some

value to the table outside of sex.

What is that?

Right.

You know what I'm saying?

And And that's what men really look for long term.

And that's always going to outweigh long run than the sex.

Yeah.

I'm telling you, because the sex is going to wear out eventually.

You know, and he's going to be looking at other girls sexually.

Yeah.

You know, but then all these other things that you bring that got like some substance to it.

Can't be replaced so easily.

Yeah, it's going to last a little.

It's going to last way longer.

It's like, come on, man.

Because sex is everywhere.

You you know what i mean

you could get it you can see it you could you could pay for it you could see it you could get it you could run up on it like the easiest thing but like a real quality in a woman like great qualities in a woman is hard to come by yeah you know someone that you look at that's like man i can just see her really teaching kids this or i can see her you know really expanding on what I got or me expanding on what she got.

You know, it's bigger than that.

And that's why we are brainwashing society to look at females sexually and be like, that's the one.

And

too many women are sexualized.

And men go for that instead of really looking at the substance of a woman in the long run and being with that long term.

That makes sense.

And it's funny you say that because a part of what you were saying was like, well, this girl can bring this and do this, but is she going to wake up and twist it and turn it

every single day?

I'm horny.

I'm doing this.

And it's like, damn, like, and what if your partner is not feeling that?

Are you going to need that to where you got to go get it from someone else?

Like, if everything is driven off of sex, it's not going to have real longevity in a relationship.

And that's just the truth.

Yeah, it's, I mean, I get what she's trying to say.

I do too.

Relationships, and I said this some episodes ago, I feel like do be based on sex

in a lot of ways.

Because if I'm with you and

you find out I have sex with another person, it could be over.

Yeah, exactly.

It's like, damn, you didn't look at everything else I brought to the table, the intangibles, the substance, like that just go out the window

because of a

mishap, because of a mistake?

Well, because of just like

sex is just like,

It's in our mind.

It's like,

how do I even explain or work?

It's, You know,

it's a beautiful thing when done with the person that you're really feeling.

You know what I'm saying?

But if it's just like casually done and just because you just a horny bastard and like she being a hoe, it's just like,

damn,

why did I risk all other

things for that?

But we're sometimes as men and women, weak individuals.

Yeah, you have mistakes, man.

Because of

sex, and that it's like a drug.

Yeah.

You know what I'm saying?

It's like people just want that quick fix, like insta-high real quick because it feels good at the moment.

But then, something then, like a lot of times, you see people regret it.

You feel miserable after

that.

Yeah.

You know what I'm saying?

But I will say this, and this is real to me.

I feel like any relationship that has lasted long that I admire, like my sister and her husband and other relationships, they've told me like, you have to be with someone that chooses you all the time and isn't willing to give up on you.

Like, I don't want to be in a relationship where it's like, oh, you did one mistake.

Okay.

Like, bye.

I'm done.

Like, I can't live like that.

But you don't know that until you make.

Yeah, until you make a mistake.

And that's why making mistakes and doing things in relationships is what either brings you closer or it makes you.

drift apart because that's how you know if someone really loves you.

It's like you said one time, it's love sometimes it's not about what you can give.

It's about what you can take.

Or love is what you can deal with.

Yeah.

Like, that's not cool.

Yeah, exactly.

For real.

Like, how can I deal with this?

And it's not cool, but I love this person and they're worth it to me.

And also, you have to have two people willing to do the work.

Because we're going to make mistakes, but are you willing to do the work, recognize where you was wrong and try to make this right?

Like I'm fucking with someone as long as I know, like, you want to make this work as bad as I do.

All right.

Like, that's half the battle.

They say, as half of the battle is two people being like, no, we're going to work this out.

We're going to do this shit.

I don't care what goes on.

Like, this is the thing about men.

We,

you know, we might mess up or the girl might mess up and she's going to drop to her knees and apologize, do all that.

Man might do that, but men don't know how to like go overboard sometimes to

apology.

Yeah,

so, and we always figure, like, and you know what our problem is, thinking we can buy our girl back.

True.

That's true.

That's right.

Men do that a lot.

Men fuck up and be like, all right, let me get her a new this or shop

or trip or car or a new house.

Like, like, bro, it takes more than that.

And that's like showing you where the basis of your relationship is.

If you do cheat on your wife and then you get her.

These gifts and now she's happy.

Like, come on.

That's not a real relationship.

That's not real substance.

That's not built on like concrete, you know, that's not built on like actually trying to make it work, like someone that actually cares and has real invested,

yeah, like really, really going through it.

Like, damn, you might have to accept she might not give you none for like a year.

That's crazy,

man.

What you mean?

A year of no sex, then your man's gonna cheat again.

How he can't have sex for a whole year, man.

It's like that's it.

That's a woman that's turned off by a man.

Like, yeah,

You sure?

So like what?

After a week, y'all going to be.

It's not a week, but I'm going to be cracking after like a few weeks.

Then it's like, okay.

Yeah.

If it's a few weeks, then he feels like he could do it again.

Right.

You need to let a man sit in the

doghouse.

You got to make a like the doghouse got to be a real doghouse.

I swear.

Like if you're willing to sit in that doghouse.

And I don't know if the number is a year, but that's a real dog house.

But then it's just like if it could get back somehow to where it was before.

It gets stronger after that, though, in my opinion.

If you guys can.

How do you know?

Well, because I know because I've been in that situation.

I feel like if you work towards repair, it's just like break,

connection repair, like D-Smoke was saying, you're going to go through that.

And I've always been taught.

You got to make sure the person is worth it because no matter who you're with, you're going to go through shit.

Everyone makes mistakes.

Everyone is not perfect.

And if you plan on being with someone for the long haul, trust and believe some shit's gonna happen.

And you gotta be willing to do the work and repair it with each other.

That's where it matters.

Not just buy it because that puts a band-aid on it.

That don't fix the root of the problems.

See, this is the problem in the relationship.

Because, like, when y'all are going through it,

a woman has to figure out how long

the doghouse has to last.

Yeah.

Like, seriously, there's a fine line on the doghouse.

Yeah, because if it's too long, then you, you, you.

But say, he doing everything he can to get back in good graces and everything.

And he's still in the doghouse, and it's one, two, three months, and he's still trying to be the man for you.

And he still wants to work it out.

And you still want to work it out also.

Yeah.

You know, like, how long is that doghouse?

Because, like, damn, like, not being able to, like, like, if a man coming home in the doghouse, he's not getting no food.

He not getting no sex.

He's not, like, damn.

The doghouse is cold.

The dog house.

And I understand that.

Yeah.

But it get to a certain point to be like, damn, like,

man, is we trying to work this out?

We'll work toward working it out then, because that ain't working toward working it out, doing shit like that.

Like, if we're going to work toward working it out, we got to have some, some tough discussions.

Because being in a doghouse to where I ain't getting fed and I ain't getting no sex and we ain't chilling and chilling, cozying up, watching movies, and we ain't liking, and you leaning to the side in the bed and you doing like, man, come on, that only come out, man can only, like, he, he understand his mistakes, but then this has got to get to the point like, all right, are we going to work through this?

Exactly.

Like, let's work on working through this because that's not working on working through this.

And I understand you mad.

And I understand that you feel a certain type of way.

But like, what are we doing then?

I agree.

Because either, okay, then are we going to end it?

Because if we're going to end it, we're going to end it.

But if if you want to work it out, you can't continue.

I always tell this: if you want to really be with someone and you want to work it out, it's only so long you can put a motherfucker through that because then you're going to start creating a divide in your relationship and you guys are going to drift apart, not together.

If I'm like, look, I know he cheated and I know the goal is I do want to be with him and I'm going to get back with him, but I'm going to let him grovel for a little bit and feel it.

But you have to put a, like you said, it's a thin line on how long you can let somebody go in that space.

Because Because as soon as a man starts to feel too neglected while he's giving his whole soul or pouring his whole heart, then at some point it's like, well, all right, what do you want me to do then?

Because you're not even budging.

And this is not us working towards it together.

We have to be both willing to do it.

If you go to therapy, they're going to say, Are y'all both willing to work it out and do the work?

If not, don't waste my time.

It's not going to work then.

If one of you is not willing.

So that's the truth.

Yeah.

I mean,

that's a tough situation.

It's a tough situation.

There's no real timeline on that.

Yeah.

You know what I'm saying?

It ain't like a week or a couple of days or two months or something like that.

It just got to be a lot of tough conversations.

There got to be conversations in a city.

There's got to be a lot of tough conversations.

Maturity, too, though.

It takes a lot of maturity to actually look at things from a logical perspective.

Women, we operate from emotion a lot, and men are more logical.

So when a woman is fueled by her emotions, we can't see straight a lot of the time.

And we can over-sensationalize things and make it way bigger than what it is.

And it's like, okay, slow down.

Let's look at it logically and let's weigh out everything.

This man is doing X, X, X, da, da, da da da da da.

This one mistake happened.

What are the pros?

What are the cons?

Let's work through this.

If you don't want to work through it, let it go.

But you can't decide to work through it and then also bring someone down every day.

Like on a woman's side, like, you know, what's the length on a woman's side?

Because we always talk about the men messing up.

We never talk about when the women mess up.

Like,

what is the women doing?

How are they trying to get back in good graces?

Are the men?

Like, we're going to forgive you.

If we want to work it out, we forgive quicker than women.

For sure.

Men are very quick to because y'all don't know.

Because we're going to either be done

or we're going to work through it.

And it's going to be back to normal quicker than

a woman going to do it.

A woman goes harp on it for a long time.

I noticed that.

A man is just gonna be like, either he loves you and he wants to be with you or he doesn't.

If he doesn't want to be with you, there's no nothing you could do.

That's why I realized with a man, if a man's done, he's done.

If he ain't, he ain't gonna sit right here and mope, turn to the business.

Yeah, exactly.

Like, he ain't gonna be over here while you're over there.

Yeah.

Like, he's gonna, like, he's gonna either be like, all right,

he gonna be like, man, you know, we're gonna talk about it.

Like, man, we're gonna have a lot of conversations.

I'm gonna cuss you out a couple of times.

And we cool.

Yeah.

And then we might be cool.

Yeah.

And then that's it like that's the difference between a man and a woman though men are much more simple women are gonna overthink it overanalyze it one sad moment one good moment then they're back sad then they're mad like ebb and flow it's yeah with a woman it goes through so many emotions you don't know if she's coming or going it's scary because you're like damn is she with me now today is she gonna wake up and be like nigga you like it goes through a lot with a man he's very cut and dry i'm either gonna be with you or i'm not if if i'm not i'm gonna tell you look, I can't do this.

I'm cool.

With a woman, that's why for men, I think women have to take more accountability when they mess up and are willing to be like, yo, because men will brush shit under the rug and it will create resentment, though.

But if a woman is willing to be like, listen, I made this mistake, because women, a lot of men tell me women don't take accountability for shit at all.

And they're willing to flip it and twist it and make it still the man's fault.

But you have to be willing to be like, listen, I made a mistake and I'm willing to work on it genuinely.

This is what the man hate when he in the doghouse.

This is, I'm going to tell you this.

Okay, go ahead.

We hate like when we're in the doghouse and then y'all, you know, we get it cracking at night.

Okay, it just be one of them nights.

Yeah.

Yeah.

And so he thinks he back good.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

And then, like, you know, a day or two later, he tried to get it back cracking and you off.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Like, damn, what was we just like?

We just cool?

Like, we're not cool now?

Yeah.

Like, damn, come on, man.

Like, come on.

That's that's cuz a woman.

What's playing with a man's emotions, though?

Like, you know, thinking, like, all right, we getting back somewhere.

We getting back cool.

Now, it's back to, now you're like, no, now you back emotional.

And as a man, when you're in that situation, do you feel like,

like, as a man dealing with women, because I'm a woman and I, you know, I'm trying to figure out, like, do you feel like when your woman is like that, you grovel more and you're like, I love you, I love you.

Do you give her space?

Like, what do you think as a man you do in them situations

like what's going on like i thought we was cool like yeah okay it's just the too much it gets too emotional up and down it's like damn like yeah we had a good day now it's a bad day it's like damn man you know i had a hard day uh then dealing with you got to deal with with the world too it's like damn then men get frustrated and that's what leads to like us doing stuff that like Yeah, we regret.

Yeah.

You know, so like.

Because you feel like you don't even have your girl anyway.

So you're like, damn.

You know, I just feel low.

I feel like I don't know what I got going on.

She not tapped in with me.

She's checked out.

Like, that's not a good feeling.

So I get that.

I get that.

So, anyways,

speaking of all of this.

So there's a bride.

who is going viral because she reacted to her fiancé's affair by reading the text text at the altar.

So this girl went ahead and had to pay for the whole wedding paid for.

And you know, them weddings is not cheap.

And her wedding was nice.

And at the altar, instead of saying her vows, he says his vows and she starts reading off the text when it's in front of his whole family and her family and everyone about his affair.

Isn't that wild?

Like, you have to be a vindictive.

All right, no.

Wait.

Did they still get married?

No.

Oh, they didn't get married.

Oh, you waited to that day?

That's what I'm trying to tell you.

What?

You went through with a whole wedding, got your makeup done, dressed, bridesmaids, families, everything.

All of this.

Paid for everything.

You wanted him to

feel it.

You, yeah.

And she went up there and she basically

read all the text.

She exposed all the cheating in front of anyone.

This is what I don't like because, like,

you made him look bad, right?

But you made yourself look bad.

You did, to me in my opinion i think so you publicly embarrassed yourself too i agree like what are you doing like that's the society and that's the generation we live in because you waited for it to be a whole public thing to like say hey i'm gonna put you on blast in front of everybody and make you so like really he like oh really that's what you was on all right i know he's sick though

you gotta be sick you gotta be sick

and he's sick and you're in front of your family and your friends because that's embarrassing like this is the one day i thought this was gonna be the happiest day of my life turned out to be one of the saddest days of my life yeah like why would you do that that's a vindictive girl that's different but like that's also a blessing in disguise too yeah it's like damn if i had to marry into this and this is what it was gonna be like i might have saved uh my life I might have saved some money and some headache.

Truthfully.

So like, if I'm here, I'm glad this happened today because if once I put the ring on as a man and marriage, and I got to deal with this, what that means you trying to bring me screaming me, yeah,

I would have been like, Thanks.

I'm glad you did that.

Like, instead of behind closed doors, you can't communicate.

See, this is what I don't like.

I don't like a motherfucker that can't have communication.

You can't be with someone for all these years willing to get married, and something happens, and you don't have a conversation.

I don't like that.

Talk to your partner.

What happened?

What is it?

Like, have a problem.

I don't like all that public shaming somebody, making them feel so bad.

You're this, you're disgusted.

Like, I don't like that.

I'm not dealing with that.

I don't fuck with that.

Like, that's what this generation.

I don't fuck with that.

Like, hey, look, he up.

Look,

he took me to cheesecake.

I'm like, I'm that type of felic.

I ain't no cheesecake.

You're embarrassing yourself, though, as a woman.

Be classy.

Like, I don't want people in my business.

I don't want everybody, my mom, my dad, my cousin, my niece, my nephew to see the text message you was cheating on me with.

Like, have some koof about yourself.

And I feel like this generation over is overexposed.

We have no privacy.

Like, you are afraid to fuck with someone because they're going to blast your business.

Like, it's blowing me because it's like, give us an opportunity to have something for ourselves.

If we going through something in our personal relationship, this is not a place to put it out to the whole world to see.

This is not for social media.

This is the intimacy of our relationship.

Why is everyone need to know this?

Like, because this is that era.

Like, everything is like, we're in the era of like social media.

We're in the era of like, I want you to know what's going on live right now, streaming.

Exposing, yeah.

Exposing my life.

Like, this is the era to the people making a lot of money from exposing their life.

Yeah.

Yeah.

You know what I'm saying?

Yeah.

Like, I don't want to like

deal with that type of pressure.

Yeah.

I expose my life

24 hours.

And then we watch that.

So people want to do it.

Yeah.

And they think that creates popularity.

They think it generates money.

They think it

becomes fame.

Yeah.

And people chase fame.

money and popularity more than ever by exposing everything you do and letting everybody see it because because they're saying this is my true authentic self, and this is what you get to see on there every day, and this is who I am.

Like, yeah, I'm like, come on, man, some stuff needs to be kept right behind the scenes.

Exactly.

And I'm always going to have that.

I'm always going to have that moving forward.

It's going to be like something I can keep.

I can hold on to this.

Like, yeah, you expose yourself.

This is for you.

Yeah, this is for me, my sanity, because I'm keeping my sanity.

Because that type of behavior will drive you crazy.

Yeah.

And you have no privacy.

And I feel like I value privacy where we live in a generation of people who do not.

And I value my privacy.

I value keeping the things that go on between me and my personal relationships private.

I don't need that to be publicized everywhere.

And I realize that even now, when it comes to everything, like women used to have to pay to see them like naked or something or see a titty.

Now I could literally open my Instagram and see titties, vagina, like anything so exposed.

It leaves no mystery.

What happened to like mystery used to be sexy, you know?

Like now it's like I could just see everything.

Everything is driven by the dollar and notoriety.

You know, because like now

like to be

everything is sexualized, everything is visualized.

Everything is exposed because you are able to monetize all of that.

Yeah.

Like, and like instead of like me,

you know, the only fans now and the watching the fight instead of breaking it up, like everything they try to monetize it because now it's just like, no,

there's no just like,

where's the dignity in this thing?

Yeah, yeah.

You know what I'm saying?

Where's the like,

where's the compassion for like, yeah, just

self-care and care for other people or like it's just like, dude, I don't

like people will film somebody getting their ass whooped right there before helping

like people will expose somebody instead of like getting to the real issue just before the notoriety of it for monetizing and it's like damn when everything is now monetized

and you can make money off embarrassing and

just

exposing yourself

and other people and other

people's like

people are going to expose other people.

Think about young thug in jail, whoever was selling

his recordings of his phone, his intimate conversations, like whatever, whatever, whatever he was saying.

Okay, I'm not defending it, but I'm just saying, like, the fact that people can't have intimate conversations, if they feel like they can make a dollar off of you, they're going to sell that information.

It doesn't matter.

It's just like, damn, can someone just have a privacy for once?

I'm so glad I'm not Hawaiian in this generation.

Yeah.

Like, and just doing stuff.

Like, come on, man.

Like,

I'm good.

Yeah.

I'm good that I was able to keep some stuff to myself.

Absolutely.

And have like

this in my back pocket and I didn't have to show, you know, all the behind-the-scenes stuff.

Like, come on, man.

Like, man, you just, it's just, no, mystery is not there anymore in that sense.

Yeah, the mystery is not there.

Yeah.

So, Cam Newton, let me make sure I do not misquote him.

He said

that he needs the list of his girl's partners that she slept with, period.

The names.

And he said he needs the names because he wants to know who got one up on him.

And he doesn't want to walk into the

place with his girl.

And he's like, yeah, she bad.

She this.

You want some juice, babe?

He said that is the juice, babe, line and everything.

And he was like, I don't want to be in front of a man who I know like you had that.

And now I'm keyking with a man and you was with my girl.

And he was like, it's just about me having that transparency and knowing so I could move accordingly.

And then his girl came out and was just like, I'm so glad I gave him my whole list.

I feel relieved.

You know, she's, she's tweeted that or put it somewhere.

So yeah, that was his thing.

And he was like, and there's a lot of people that are like, all right, cool.

I could work with that.

And he said, and then if it's someone like, that was my teammate, you know, like that was someone I see every day.

Like, I'm not, I'm not, I might not be able to deal with that.

He said, but if it's someone cool,

cool, you know, but yeah, he said, I need that list.

Yeah, I mean, I get it, you know, and that's, it's.

For me, it's a double-edged sword because it's like, damn, do I really want to know or do I like, like, I get it.

I get it.

Like, I completely get it.

Yeah.

You know what I'm saying?

I was in a situation to where I was talking to this girl.

I was dating this girl, right?

And, you know, we went out a couple times.

And then

it was like, I remember

we had dinner.

We sat down and she was like, yeah,

my ex is whoopty woop.

And I was just like, what?

Like I currently kick it with him.

Yeah.

Like from time to time.

Yeah.

His number, like, we just kicked it.

Like, like, why wouldn't you say nothing at the beginning?

Yeah.

Like, you know, that I

kick it with a dude.

Yeah.

Like, so I get it.

You know what I'm saying?

So, like, for me, I was like, I'm not talking to you.

Yeah, yeah, no more.

You know, I'm good on that because I don't move like that.

Like, if it's a dude I'm kicking it with, and I know you his ex, I'm not moving like that.

Yeah, facts.

You know, so like, I get where Cam is coming from with that because those type of situations can come about.

And I'm not mad at that, you know because like i've been in situations or with girls that i was committed to to where i asked like who else you know whoa whoa whoa and you could tell me the truth or you could lie whatever i'm an ah ass you know what i'm saying but it's gonna show anyway eventually but like not my somebody i kick it with like you should have the type of like

you know like you should be with somebody be like Like, you shouldn't even want to talk to me if you know.

Exactly.

That's weird.

That's on her.

You know what I'm saying?

That's on you.

Like, why are you talking to me?

Like, I'm not the get back dude.

Yeah.

You trying to get back on some stuff?

No, but if we're trying to get serious, like.

That's not going to work.

That's not going to work.

And that's true.

I feel like the whole list or whatever the names are, to me, I'm like not against it, but I also feel like it's for me more of a thing of like respect.

Like, look, I'm not going to have my man in front of someone, shake a hand, boo up with someone that I know I used to mess with.

I'm going to tell him, like, yo, we had a situation going on.

I'm just letting you know.

Like that's more of the thing.

Like I'll give a list if it's needed, but I think that the bigger thing is like, I'm not going to let my man feel like he's out of control and like not respected or like someone feels like they got a one-up.

I never want anyone to feel like they got a one-up on my man because that's a reflection of me.

I'm a reflection of him.

Like I don't want that feeling and I don't want that for me.

Like I don't want to be out with my man.

This girl like, yeah, girl, that's my, like, I'm going to feel crazy.

And if I'm keykeeing with you and I'm cool, like, that makes me uncomfortable.

And I would never want my man to feel that same way.

So, you're just going to tell him right off the gate.

Like, I'm going to tell you these niggas.

I will, like, if it's them, that's probably crazy.

It's not.

The disrespect

is out of control.

Here, I'm going to send you, I'm going to fax you these because I don't want you to see.

No, actually, my list is not crazy.

Thank you.

Your list is crazy.

No, it's not.

And I honestly haven't.

No, my list is small.

Like, I can count my list on my hands.

Like, I don't have a big list and I know who I've slept with.

And for me, like I said, it's more of a respect thing to where if I'm like, yeah, if my man is kiking with someone, like, first of all, if I have a man and I know I mess with his friend or someone he kicks it with, that's not my man.

I'm not, we're not fucking around like to begin with, unless I just did not know.

And once I find out, I'm telling you, like, oh, look, this is the situation because I don't want someone else to say it.

like that's weird this is the one thing i would love to ask cam

uh

like

i would love to ask cam if he gave her his list or was that required i don't think that was required would that be a thing i don't think that's a thing

like like

You know, he's a pretty famous dude.

And, you know, it's a possibility he's been with some famous women.

Or it's a possibility he could have been with like some of the girls he's dated or been like in a situation.

Like his girl's friends.

Yeah.

One of her friends.

I wonder if he gave the list too.

So I don't know, Cam.

It go both ways too.

Did you give your list up or is just required from her?

I'm just saying like, damn, I ain't ever.

I'm sure.

I wonder like, damn.

I mean, I don't think that it was.

Like, me personally, I'll be honest.

If I'm with a man, I don't want to know his list.

But what I want to know is like, don't have me looking stupid.

But I will tell you this about a man.

A man don't even know his list.

Don't even know his list.

That's what I'm saying.

A man don't even know his list.

Barely remember his name.

Yeah.

Hold on, let me go through the phone.

Like, what?

Like.

I used to like,

a man don't know his list.

Man, he don't know his list.

And that's the difference.

And I think that

for women, we're expected to have less partners, right?

So, like, his girl, he has a girl, she's beautiful, and they have kids together, whatever.

And she came out, she said, you give him a list.

You know, I'm sure she messed with some celebrities or whoever, maybe.

Like, but I feel like

with a man,

you are not expected to do that because you, we don't know who the hell y'all slept with because y'all don't know who the hell y'all sleep with.

Celebrity men that be out in public that have had women come up to them and be like, hey, remember we hung out and

yeah, for sure.

I've been out with a man that I'm with, and women have come up, like, hello, hello, like, and as a woman, I know what that means.

That means, like, you had sex with her.

That don't mean hello.

Maybe you just know me or we talk.

No, no, no, no, no.

It's a certain energy because it's like a girl will be like, because I'm a girl.

So I don't do that type of stuff because I'm not the type of woman.

Maybe you used to talk to them.

Talk or like you had sex with them and you just left them high and dry.

Because I know that energy of what a woman brings.

Like, oh, hello, yeah, me, yeah, you ready, like, girl.

Well, like, and it's embarrassing to be trying to embarrass a guy.

Uh, truthfully, girls, if you be out and like talk to this guy for like years and see him with a girl, and he probably curved her and might do that, too.

Yeah, like, oh, hey, hey,

and then he's looking at her, like, nigga, you better get out of here.

Yeah, I feel like women do that, and I've noticed that too, where it's like, girl, like, and for me, I've never done that because that's embarrassing.

Yeah, they are.

Women behaviors.

And you know what I notice about women?

Like,

women are such haters sometimes.

Like, if someone hit me up and was like, hey, was my man, was my man flirting with you?

And I would probably be like, nah, because that's not my business.

I would either not reply or I would say no.

But I've noticed that women are haters.

And sometimes women think that a man is flirting with them or someone's flirting with them.

And I'm just being friendly.

Like, you doing too much.

Now, you cocky enough to think that I even want you is blowing me.

Like, and I think that women have an inflated ego sometimes, and you think that somebody wants you when they don't.

And y'all just, I just can't.

Like, and I've been noticing that a lot.

So, yeah, anyways, getting into this next thing.

So, there, huh?

So, talk to me.

Okay, so there's

a woman, right?

And she's in a relationship with a man, and it was her birthday.

He sent her, and mind you,

he posted the text messages on the internet.

Okay.

He sent her 2K for her birthday.

Like just for the day.

Like, baby.

Yeah, that's.

Wait, wait, wait, they're together.

Yeah, but they are together.

So

he sent her 2K and was like, you know, happy birthday.

Are they together?

Yeah.

They're in a relationship.

Okay.

So he sent her 2K.

And she returned it and sent it back on, because it's Apple Pay.

Sent it back on the Apple Pay Pay and said,

first of all, we've been together way too long for you to think sending me 2K for my birthday is cool.

I deserve way more than 2K and I know my worth.

Like 2,000 is not enough money.

If you're going to send me money, it needs to be way more than that.

Like, I'm cool.

And she sent it back.

So everyone is outraged.

You know, the men are like, bitch, like, 2K is cool.

Like, you're tripping.

What are your thoughts on that?

My thoughts on that is if she did that and everybody's reacting to that, he's given her more than 2K just on a regular day.

And today is her birthday and you only gave her 2K because I'm trying to tell you, like, she wouldn't have did that if he has never given her 2K before.

First of all, he's probably been on some, like, hey man, take this 5K on a regular day.

You know what I'm saying?

Or take this 10 racks, but then it's my birthday.

Hold on.

You didn't gave me more on like a basic day, right?

On a regular day.

I'm trying to tell.

So she looking like, damn, I'm really getting a deuce piece.

Like, you gave me five just on some chill.

Like, oh, here you go.

Oh, you're going out of town.

You're chilling.

Like, just some regular,

he go five.

Yeah.

So, like, for her to do that

meant he gave her more on some like basic shit 100%.

Because ain't no girl, if he ain't never gave her 2K before, and he was like, oh, you up the ante.

Boom, he go 2,000.

Yeah.

Like, damn.

I didn't know if it meant like,

I want you to make an actual effort and not give me money.

Like, or if she just was like mad because it seemed like she was just mad because it was only 2K, though.

Yeah, because he didn't give her more before.

Okay.

On a basic day.

He probably gave her more on Valentine.

Like, here, go shopping 5,000.

They go 2K on your birthday.

Because she was like, I know my worth.

And this is for you, for us to be together this long and you only giving me 2k let me tell you i'll tell you exactly what she said too this is her her exact message she said he said happy early birthday baby love you forever wishing you many more i'm gonna be sleep at 12 so telling you now lol and sent her 2000.

she said thanks but i'm gonna send it back i just feel like we've been together way too long for me to only get two thousand dollars for my b-day you spend that on food in a month i'm not being ungrateful i just know my worth thank you though you always been sweet, but it's niggas really out here trying to spend a bag on me.

I don't like her energy.

She don't like you, really.

Yeah.

She don't really like you because you're worried about other guys spending more money on you.

Because when it's love, you're not even tripping off that.

Exactly.

Like, oh, that's cool.

I appreciate that.

Like, maybe he's trying to test me.

Like, because if, like, see, females, y'all don't know, y'all play checkers, not chess.

And what I mean by that, like, he could have gave her 5K on another day, 10K on another day, a basic day.

He gave her 2K on her birthday.

Yeah.

If she had been like, oh, I appreciate that.

Just everything you do for me is so sweet.

It's just amazing that I got you in my life.

He's like, damn, that's the answer I really wanted to hear.

He probably was testing her, and he would have put her threw her more.

Exactly.

And that's what I'd be trying to like.

Like, females, like, get so reactive and emotional off.

Like, like, damn, you should be thankful

for that.

I agree.

Come on, now.

I agree.

Damn.

Like, I hate the fact that

a man

has to do something for a woman, and that sets the bar.

To if I do anything less than that, it's a disappointment.

Like, come on, man.

It should be like, oh, I might have did this this time, but I'm going to do this this time.

Like, at least I'm doing.

Like, come on, now.

I'm doing.

I'm putting

you.

I agree.

Sherris, nails is done right, boo.

Damn.

Them stilettos is looking right.

Them heels, yeah lips is popping like damn you eating good right you eating good right yeah like damn

man and i just hate that like a man so that that goes into the into the like category and things that we speak of of you led with money my boy yes so like now 100 when the money ain't keep going up yeah she gonna go to motherfuckers that's offering her shit and this is what i hate i hate the fact that like it's so tough to have a relationship when when

he offered her two, and like, she threw like, niggas is offering me a bag.

How?

What you mean, niggas is offering a bag?

Why is that an option?

Wait, wait, wait, wait, how?

Yeah.

Why?

Yeah.

Because now I got my Instagram to where I got to compete with Instagram every day with guys saying how beautiful I am.

How you deserve this, you deserve that.

And they gassing you.

See, and this is the problem with relationships.

Yeah.

You're right.

I got to compete every day.

If I don't upstage whoever I'm competing with, I got to compete with millions of dudes every day for my girl.

Yeah.

Like, come on, man.

That's crazy to me.

Yeah.

Like, I got to make sure her mind is right.

I'm telling her she's beautiful.

The one day I don't tell her she's beautiful, I'm going to be at a disadvantage because she got millions telling her this.

And because I was mad and all this, I got to deal with this.

Like, come on, man.

That's crazy.

Period.

Period.

I agree.

I agree 100%.

I feel like

Instagram does create a false sense of options because a lot of those people who are telling you you look good in this, they're not doing nothing.

They're not going to really be committed to you in a relationship.

I think women mistake attention with actual, like someone who wants to really deal with you.

Just because someone gives you attention doesn't mean they would want to be in a committed relationship, work with you, do this.

So, yes, you can feel like it's a competition, but at the same time, like if you have any sense at all, you know that that's not a real competition because

they're not really going gonna do nothing.

Like, and for her, what I don't like is I don't like people who like try to put people down.

If I give you 2,000, this is what I'm doing for you, and then you tell me some other people are gonna go do that, go with them.

Then, like, I'm that type of person, someone else doing it.

Cool.

If that's what matters to you more is monetary shit than being in a real relationship, then you go there.

That's all I'm so sick of people right now.

Um,

okay, we're gonna play a little game

to where

you tell me if this is a red flag or this, you'll stay.

Like, would you stay or would you walk?

So you find out that your girl is texting her ex

every birthday.

Happy birthday.

Wish you the best.

Hope everything is well every year.

Now,

your ex

like break it down.

Okay.

Is this your ex?

Y'all don't have kids?

You don't have kids.

Because it's different if you have kids.

You're going to say happy birthday.

We're not talking about your

existing birthday.

You don't have kids with this person.

No.

No attachments, no ties.

No attachments.

That's a red flag.

That's tricky.

That's tricky.

Because, like, you know, no, that's weak.

And are you in a relationship?

Yeah.

No, I'm good.

Don't do that.

That's disrespectful.

I agree.

Super disrespectful.

I agree.

Man, come on.

I'm over that.

I'm cool.

Don't do that.

Yeah.

you still got feelings.

You still out here.

Like, why you got to do all that?

Let it go.

It's so funny because I was in a relationship and I saw my ex.

He texted, well, it was my boyfriend at the time.

He texted his ex a paragraph like, happy birthday.

I know you're doing great.

And I hope all is well.

And I just, there's a whole thing.

And I'm like, uh-uh, you still have feelings for this person?

Yeah, that's crazy.

Okay, so

you find

in your girl's phone phone a bunch of old sex tapes and naked photos of her and her ex.

But they're old.

I didn't even know.

I didn't see them.

These are old, babe.

Like, I just forgot to delete them.

Red flag or

how old?

The pictures are old.

They're not recent at all, but she still has keeping them in her phone, basically.

I ain't really tripping.

You're not tripping off of that.

Okay.

Yeah, I ain't tripping.

Okay, okay, okay.

You catch your girl liking thirst traps at 2 a.m.

Like men doing weird, sexy shit.

What do you mean?

Like, you see it on Instagram.

Yeah.

I'm not even like, I'm not even that advanced on Instagram, so I can look to see whoever is liking.

No, but like, what if you go past it and you see, like, she's all on a man's page liking every pick and it's at 2 a.m

you're not tripping off of that okay

like i'm the type of dude that pick my battles like like i don't know if that's your brother i don't know if that's your right your your sister-in-law's brother cousin like i'm not gonna just assume nothing right away yeah and Like, I always feel like, and I say this all the time, that the real truth will come to light.

Like, you know, if you consistently doing that in the middle of the night, then I'm going to have some questions.

But if I catch it like once in a blue moon, like, I ain't, like,

I'm cool on all that, trying to listen.

Like, I'm good on all that stress.

I worry about the big things.

Okay.

Okay.

What about, okay,

what about

they go through your phone while you're asleep?

And what?

They're just, you catch them.

You are sleeping.

You wake up and you catch them going through all your shit

on your phone.

I hope you don't find nothing.

That's it.

What?

I mean, what do you want me to do?

Are you mad?

Like, why would you invade my privacy?

Why are you going through my phone while I'm asleep?

Or are you just like, whatever?

I'm probably like, whatever.

Okay.

Like, we sleep together?

What do you mean?

We sleep together.

We live together.

You're in a relationship.

Yeah, you sleep with the person and they went to your mother.

You probably have nothing to hide.

Okay.

Got you.

Okay.

What about...

What about you?

Okay, what is the cool thing?

If you catch the dude and you wake up, you're like, oh, you look over, he gives your phone like, oh, you're going to be be mad?

No, not really.

I'm not gonna be mad.

I think that I'm just gonna be like, whatever.

Like, if I'm in a relationship and we're together,

I don't think I would be mad at that.

I think I would just be like, whatever.

I don't care about that, honestly.

I think that for me,

obviously, like, do you not trust me?

Like, maybe it's a deeper conversation, but hopefully you saw the phone and you didn't find nothing, obviously.

So you, you, what, what's the, like, I'm not worried about it in that way.

I think what I would be more concerned about is, is there a trust issue here?

Well, maybe he's never done it before.

He's just, I just want to be sure.

He just wants to be extra sure that there's sure.

I just want to be sure one time.

And that's the answer that I get.

Like, so you just wanted to be extra sure and you had your own like issues from the past type of thing.

Yeah.

Then I probably will get it.

I'll be like, all right, cool.

What about you ask your partner to to share locations and they say no?

Why not?

They say, I don't like that.

I'm old school.

I don't do shit like that.

Share a location.

I think we live in that time.

Yeah, where everything.

Yeah.

You should.

Like, if that's your partner, you should be able to do all that.

Yeah, but what if you're like, I don't want to do that?

Like, what if you wait, like, I think you got something to hide?

You think automatically you lying about where you at

But like the location is nothing to me like I could just be at

right anyone could be at any location and still be lying That's my point like

I could say that I'm here at dinner with my friend and I'm really with somebody

could pull up to that location at a later date like you know like if you had a house somebody house yeah what if i'm at my house and someone you could be at an apartment building though that's the tricky part you had an apartment building.

You say your girl live here.

I'm going to find out.

Exactly.

There's so many things.

It's like, this is my thing about the location thing.

If we have to get to that point of the location, it goes back into like.

You're trying to micromanage the relationship and you're never going to be able to control where someone is, what they're doing.

If someone is going to cheat on you, they're going to cheat on you.

If someone's going to do this, they're going to do this.

And in my thing, I'm like, okay, but it makes me feel like, damn, like, do you not, what?

Like, you're trying to control.

That's you have trying to have a sense of control.

You're in the middle of an argument and you

doing all this.

And I'm like, where you at?

Don't worry about it.

Like, what was it?

Like, damn.

That's wild.

Yeah.

But it's like for you to want to just say, let me micromanage everything.

So I'm not trying to break the trust.

Yeah, exactly.

So if someone's like, where are you?

I'm here.

Like, whatever the case is, like, you want a FaceTime?

Okay.

Like, but I think that when you're trying to micromanage or control the situation, like I've been in past relationships where I have been like, I want to control everything.

I want to see this.

I want to see that.

But you can do all of that.

And a motherfucker who's going to cheat is going to cheat on you.

It don't matter what you do.

Matter of fact, the more pressure you put up on somebody, the more likely they're going to do it because they feel pressurized and they feel like, damn, now you're like, damn near putting it on me, like to where I'm about to go do that shit.

Or like a woman will bring up a girl so often to a man, he wasn't even thinking about her.

Now Now, I'm starting to think about the bitch.

Now, I'm like, damn,

she's in my mind all the time.

You pushing somebody to go do some shit.

Like, I feel like a lot of people end up pushing people into the arms of others.

And it's like, you got to lay back.

I learned that I used to be uptight, like, and I have to just be like, now that I'm older, when I was young, I used to think you can control shit.

Now I realize you can't control nothing that nobody do.

And I'm not trying to do you.

I'm not trying to stalk you down.

Right.

But anyways, okay.

Well, that's about it.

All right, man.

We had a good conversation.

We had a good combo.

That was dope, man.

All right.

Good stuff off, man.

Hopefully y'all continue to support Truth After Dark.

Yes, please.

We're going to get through this.

You know, your boy been through some shit, but it's good.

Continue to support us.

Like and subscribe.

We'll keep you updated on what's going on.

Exactly.

Good.

And trust me.

Everything good.

Everything is good.

We love y'all.

Again, make sure you guys are subscribed.

Comment different topics you would like us to discuss or cover.

We'd love to hear that.

Any questions?

Live.

We should live.

Have some questions.

We should.

We will.

We need to do a live show for sure.

And we will do that.

That's coming soon.

Yeah.

Live stream.

Live stream.

What y'all think about that?

Put that in the comments.

Yeah.

Y'all want us to live stream.

What do y'all want to see from us?

Hear from us.

Y'all want us to do some live shows, some live streams.

Like, let us know what you guys are feeling next for Truth After Dark.

We have a lot of dope things coming and a lot of things in the mix.

So, thank you again for all the support and the love.

Peace out.

This is the taking over the game.

All right, everybody.

Welcome to Truth After Dark.

Do you think that men or women are more toxic?

Heads up, California.

There's a statewide special election November 4th.

Active registered voters will receive a vote-by-mail ballot that can be returned at a drop-off location in person or by mail.

Rest assured, your vote is secure.

You can even sign up to track your ballot.

Your vote is your voice.

Use it.

Don't delay.

Vote right away.

Get more information or check your voter status at sos.ca.gov.

A message from the California Secretary of State.

Every now and then I rinse it out.

And I need to be rinse tonight.

And I need it more.

I can't wait for the bed and the smell of a leaf.

I'm always in the dark.

The sweet deck shore smells like a dark car.

I'm downy rinse it tonight.

Downy rinse fights stubborn odors in just one wash.

When impossible odors get stuck in, rinse it out.

Snoring ruining your sleep or someone else's?

Mute by RhinoMed is the simple science-backed solution.

Just insert, adjust, and breathe.

Mute is a discrete nasal device proven to increase airflow and reduce snoring.

No batteries, no noise, just better sleep.

Find Mute at Amazon and Walgreens.

Try it risk-free and sleep soundly tonight.

Learn more at mutesnoring.com.

That's mutesnoring.com.

This is an iHeart podcast.