Club Shay Shay - Anthony Hamilton Part 1

Transcript

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Speaker 21 Also, someone you're very close to, Angie Stone.

Speaker 22 You You saw him at the funeral.

Speaker 23 Took them both of them. I'd never seen anybody late to rest looking so peaceful.
And she had a smirk on her face, like, I told y'all,

Speaker 23 I'm serious, man, in all Angie Stone fashion.

Speaker 25 All my life, been grinding all my life.

Speaker 26 Sacrifice, hustle, paid the price.

Speaker 26 Want a slice, got to roll a dice.

Speaker 25 That's why.

Speaker 2 All my life, I've been grinding all my life.

Speaker 20 Want a slice, got the roll of dice, that's why, all my life, I've been grinding all my life.

Speaker 28 Hello, welcome to another episode of Club Shea Shay.

Speaker 30 I am your host, Shannon Sharp.

Speaker 32 I'm also the proprietor of Club Shea Shay. Stopping by for conversation on a drink today.
This has been a long time in the making, seven, eight years in the making, and we're making it happen today.

Speaker 34 He's one of RB's most distinctive and relatable voices, one of the last sold superstar singers that's had an impact on modern culture.

Speaker 36 They say he sounds like he was born in a pot of collard greens.

Speaker 34 The national treasure, a narrator of love, a Grammy Award-winning singer, a multi-platinum selling songwriter, soulful storyteller, intergenerational artist, renowned musician, phenomenal producer, a veteran entertainer, an actor, an author, and a publisher.

Speaker 39 He sold over 50 million albums worldwide, a Charlotte Bread hitmaker, and a local music legend.

Speaker 32 He's in the North Carolina Music Hall of Fame, a gift to our generation, a staple in the RB community.

Speaker 40 Here he is from North Carolina, a country boy, Mr.

Speaker 42 Anthony Hamilton.

Speaker 35 Good evening. How are you doing? All right, bro.
Good to see you, man. This show is going to be a little different.
What we're going to do is we're going to go in between. Anthony will perform a song.

Speaker 22 He'll come sit in the

Speaker 22 chair.

Speaker 35 Tell us about the song, what he was thinking when he wrote the song, what the song actually means, because I'm sure there are a lot of people out there that think these songs are about them.

Speaker 34 And he's going to set the record straight.

Speaker 35 So here he is to perform his first song, Charlene.

Speaker 43 Woke up this morning, found a letter that she wrote.

Speaker 44 She says she's sad that I'm always on the road.

Speaker 46 Too hard to swallow up, being

Speaker 46 alone.

Speaker 43 She needs a point at night that she could hold.

Speaker 44 She must adore me a thousand times more.

Speaker 44 Silent Christ I used to ignore.

Speaker 26 God knows I love her.

Speaker 25 Didn't mean to hurt her.

Speaker 25 sitting here waiting on you to come home again

Speaker 48 Waiting on you, baby

Speaker 49 And I'll be by your side

Speaker 47 And I'll love you and to be with you for life

Speaker 20 Oh

Speaker 50 She knows I really love this show music gang

Speaker 44 Since I was a child, it's been my grain

Speaker 49 I can't support her, treat her and spoil her

Speaker 49 You know about her to find nothing

Speaker 46 But I forgot about her

Speaker 51 Damn the money, diamonds and food

Speaker 26 What about the hard days she had with the babies?

Speaker 48 All she needed is for me to love

Speaker 48 me away.

Speaker 48 She won't

Speaker 48 be here until the very end.

Speaker 47 And I promise I'll be here

Speaker 47 to the table

Speaker 2 to be a

Speaker 2 darling.

Speaker 2 war

Speaker 2 promise I can't live without her

Speaker 2 God knows I need another

Speaker 48 But you see sometimes that I hurt so bad

Speaker 20 that she's going

Speaker 20 here

Speaker 20 God knows I pray

Speaker 20 she'll come home one day and hey

Speaker 20 in my life

Speaker 20 Well, now, oh,

Speaker 20 see, baby, I'll be here.

Speaker 20 I'm waiting on you to come. Sit here, said I'm waiting on

Speaker 20 the promise of me until the very end. I'll feel you full eyes.

Speaker 20 Say, I won't be.

Speaker 47 Sometimes say I cry

Speaker 48 Charlene, if you're listening,

Speaker 47 could you call on

Speaker 47 me?

Speaker 47 Cause I'm on club shape, John Bay

Speaker 47 about it, baby.

Speaker 52 Come on, have a seat. Come on, have a seat.
Come on, have a seat. We got to talk about this.
Let's talk about it. Oh, man.
Don't star, Shannon. Don't star.

Speaker 52 We got to talk about it, boo, bro.

Speaker 52 Thank you, baby.

Speaker 39 Good to be here, man.

Speaker 2 Yes, sir. Absolutely.

Speaker 35 So

Speaker 34 is this a real story that someone actually says, Anthony, you're working to, bro.

Speaker 23 You know what? It is a real story. Her name is now Charlene.
Okay.

Speaker 35 So

Speaker 53 you wanted to protect the inner.

Speaker 23 You know, the little money I was getting in, I wanted to keep it.

Speaker 54 Yes, yes, yes.

Speaker 23 But yeah, it was a relationship, you know. Okay.
And just working, being focused on what I was born to do, man, sing and go get it.

Speaker 23 And sometimes it's not good enough to be successful in your business and home suffers. So

Speaker 23 a series of events happened. We broke up.

Speaker 23 And,

Speaker 23 you know,

Speaker 23 Heartbreak created a song, song, a staple song for me.

Speaker 55 But when you,

Speaker 23 the old saying,

Speaker 56 you'll lose a lot of money chasing women.

Speaker 57 Yeah.

Speaker 56 But you won't lose a woman chasing money.

Speaker 38 That's not true.

Speaker 29 You're telling us like,

Speaker 59 how do you find a balance?

Speaker 57 Because when you're trying to achieve something great, people say, oh, it's work-life balance.

Speaker 60 Work-life balance is nine to five.

Speaker 29 But when you're trying to get it like you were trying to get it, there is no balance.

Speaker 23 And you need to have someone that's in your life that can understand that absolutely i think a lot of times you know people think

Speaker 23 their life's going to be structured yes you know that like you said the 95 but music business is not structured one minute you hot and the next minute you may not be you'll be home for a couple months and the next thing you know you turn around you got to hit record and you're gone three four months at a time and you're in the studio late nights right as well you can be close to the house but never make it at home

Speaker 23 you know so you know people with that expectations of well you're here why you're not at the house right but i'm I'm working.

Speaker 62 And you could theoretically be at home, but your mind is a thousand miles away and you're thinking about something that you need to get done.

Speaker 23 Absolutely. I'm at home laying with you and I'm thinking about these 16 bars in the head.

Speaker 23 You know, man. So, you know, you have to compromise

Speaker 23 in these kind of relationships. And you have to have a woman.
or a person or whoever, puppy or whatever, who understands that lifestyle and they can handle it.

Speaker 29 Everyone said, me being an ex-professional athlete and i've had relationships that i can i'm fine being number two yeah until they actually have to be number two that training yeah meetings and working out and the way you eat is first yeah but you said you can handle it well i thought i could yeah because and i'm sure they probably say well and oh man i'm i'm gonna support you hey

Speaker 67 i pushing you not just you walking i'm pushing you

Speaker 57 but when it actually happens yeah and you have to be gone or you have to be in the studio because when an idea hit, it hits.

Speaker 53 You can't just like, well, okay, I get up and do it in the morning.

Speaker 28 No. It hits then.

Speaker 63 I got to go right then.

Speaker 29 I got to go do what I need to do.

Speaker 30 How difficult is that to get them to understand

Speaker 68 I'm not a nine to five type of a guy.

Speaker 56 Yeah.

Speaker 30 And what you're accustomed to or what you've been used to is far from that.

Speaker 23 I think it's two ways to it. A lot of times,

Speaker 23 you know, men or women or whoever will train them in a way to make them comfortable Because you want to secure it because you know this person is special, right?

Speaker 23 But then when the real life sets in it's just like wow I didn't train you on this behalf on this part here

Speaker 23 So now you know, I may seem like I'm unbalanced and I'm out of out of character, but ultimately this is what I'm supposed to be doing. Yes, that's your calling.

Speaker 23 Yeah, it is and so you just have to Let them know like hey, there's gonna be some nights. I'm gonna have to get out of this bed and go like the other night.

Speaker 23 I was working a buster rhymes call He needed a hook real fast. I had to, you know,

Speaker 23 get up and go get it. Even though I was by myself this time.

Speaker 23 But

Speaker 23 I had to go.

Speaker 23 Kids, y'all hold it down. Don't let nobody in the house.
But you have to go and that's another way, you know, you suffer when you have children.

Speaker 38 Yes.

Speaker 23 You know, have to sacrifice time with them as well.

Speaker 57 Do the kids understand? Because

Speaker 29 I was very neglectful in that aspect.

Speaker 21 I would promise my kids I was going to do something, but I had run myself into exhaustion.

Speaker 29 I had lifted myself into oblivion.

Speaker 68 And I was too tired to do what I had promised them that I was going to do.

Speaker 21 And they had to make sacrifices that no other kids had to make.

Speaker 27 Yeah.

Speaker 23 That's hard. That's a hard one because, you know, I think my first three, I have six sons.
So my first three, my older boys, Anthony and Romero and Tristan, they got more of the sacrifice time. Yes.

Speaker 23 You know, I was there, but. you know, I missed a lot of the school dance.

Speaker 72 You missed the football practices and you missed all the basketball and the PTAs and all this stuff.

Speaker 23 So I go harder now for my last three. Okay.
I go harder. I'm at the football games.
But still, then, like, they were at the house.

Speaker 23 My ex-wife had to come and pick them up last night because I had to be here to do this. I ain't going to miss the club section.

Speaker 28 I ain't going to miss it again.

Speaker 27 I appreciate that.

Speaker 28 We talked about this because Anthony and I, we would have been DM.

Speaker 55 And we've this thing goes back seven, eight years.

Speaker 62 It does. And

Speaker 57 when it came to my, and I was talking to my producer CJ, I said, man, we need to get Anthony Hamilton, but not just for a sit-down, but to have him perform. CJ was like, yeah, that'd be a good idea.

Speaker 72 And we just kept going, kept going.

Speaker 68 And it took seven, eight years.

Speaker 57 And it finally happened.

Speaker 73 And man, I'm so excited because,

Speaker 29 look, everybody knows coming where I'm from, and Charlene, and I cry, and her heart, all that.

Speaker 38 I mean, we

Speaker 38 grew up.

Speaker 28 We grew up.

Speaker 38 But now you old school too.

Speaker 28 Cause it's like, man, you're the OG. The OGs used to be Luther and

Speaker 62 Teddy P and Donnie Hathaway and Barry White.

Speaker 29 Now

Speaker 29 that's you.

Speaker 23 Yeah, if it ain't that, it's Uncle.

Speaker 23 But I think I'm on aged out of Unc now.

Speaker 62 You know the aged out of Unc now?

Speaker 23 I think I'm

Speaker 23 what am I, OG, triple OG?

Speaker 71 OG, triple OG?

Speaker 23 I still outrun a lot of them, though. I still outrun them.

Speaker 23 Still outrun them.

Speaker 36 So how long,

Speaker 35 what's the expectation?

Speaker 29 Having been married and having been in this music industry, because you got to move around.

Speaker 69 You might be in Raleigh, and then you're in Charlotte, and then you're in Atlanta, and then you in Florida, and you're from Jacksonville, Orlando, so forth and so on.

Speaker 65 How long do you think?

Speaker 30 I mean, it's hard for you to say, but for a woman to say, okay, this man is chasing his dreams.

Speaker 28 Yeah.

Speaker 32 How long do you think is a realistic expectation for her to support you?

Speaker 23 I think it'd happen. I think, you know, I've met some really amazing women since my divorce.

Speaker 23 And right now, I've been talking and

Speaker 23 seeing someone who's pretty special.

Speaker 23 I think

Speaker 23 she kind of gets it. Yes.
And so I'm willing to do the work to to try to see where it goes, ballows it out. Yeah.

Speaker 38 Because you know, the thing is, is that sometimes I feel women want a finished product.

Speaker 28 Yeah. The house is already built.

Speaker 29 Yeah. Everything is already done.
But in your life, but when you were coming up, you're trying to build a house.

Speaker 68 You're trying to lay a foundation. The stronger the foundation, it can't be broken.

Speaker 30 It can't be shook.

Speaker 65 But if the foundation is not solid,

Speaker 23 yeah, you know, and that's women have taught, you know, a man is supposed to be the security and all that stuff. And sometimes the security don't look the same as it does for somebody else.
Correct.

Speaker 23 You know, I'm a provider.

Speaker 23 I'm there. I'm making sure that certain things are done.
But when I leave, I'm going to make sure that things are taken care of. So when I get back, you'll feel as if my presence was there.

Speaker 23 And I think if you try to do that, you can have a better outcome.

Speaker 68 How hard was it for you to trace your dreams?

Speaker 21 Did you ever feel like, man, this issue ain't going to happen, man?

Speaker 71 Damn.

Speaker 73 It seems like every time I mean, I feel like I'm so close.

Speaker 28 I know this is my calling.

Speaker 23 Absolutely.

Speaker 33 But how long were you willing to stay on this path?

Speaker 23 Had you not?

Speaker 29 Because I think it was with the Nappy Roots. Is that when they heard you and they

Speaker 23 just got special? You know,

Speaker 23 I had been signed. I got signed in 93.
I used to open up for Jodic

Speaker 23 when a freaking you came out. Okay.

Speaker 23 And I was signed to Uptown. Andre Hurrell really believed in me.
And

Speaker 23 Uptown and Andre Hurrell and MCA, they fell out. So So here I am left dangling in between paperwork.

Speaker 55 They leave you hanging.

Speaker 23 So I'm left paperworking. So from 93, it wasn't until 2003 when Jermaine

Speaker 23 Jermaine put me out that success started to happen. But in between that, I was signed

Speaker 23 Soul Life,

Speaker 23 Jive Records,

Speaker 23 so many different labels. And after about three or four of those, you want to kind of

Speaker 23 throw your hands up. Throw your hands up.
Yeah, but then God had given me something. Like he gave me the Tupac record or the Nappy Roots.
Or I wrote,

Speaker 23 co-wrote, say what, for Donnell Jones. So give me a little thing to keep you going.
To keep you going, man. Yeah.
It's like, no, I got something better for you. So just stay the course.

Speaker 29 Was it hard to continue to chase your dream when you didn't have a whole lot of money coming in?

Speaker 23 Yeah, you know, being a barber, you know, I can make a couple dollars, get a couple pieces of pizza. You know what I mean?

Speaker 23 Get a couple pieces of pizza here and there, adding some water. But, you know, my landlord was like, Antie, I need my money.
You know, Miss Ryan, I appreciate you up there in Harlem.

Speaker 23 But, you know, and she believed in me, but still, the shame you feel not being able to hold your part of the bargain up can kind of weigh on you a little bit as well.

Speaker 57 Because it's a situation like if I had provided a service, I'm going to vote my money.

Speaker 55 I ain't trying to hear that.

Speaker 57 Well, hey, hey, you know, it's tight this money.

Speaker 38 You know, hey, just bear with me.

Speaker 23 And so I understand, you know, people like, well, you know money's tight i still got i still got a mortgage to pay on this building so you know you talk about it's tight how does that that impacts me it does man you know you come and get a haircut somebody i ain't got i got about you know the haircut's ten dollars right you got 450 in a in a nickel bag that ain't gonna work

Speaker 23 that ain't gonna work man come on man

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Speaker 23 Where be my money?

Speaker 28 So that'll be nine.

Speaker 67 I'll be showing 50 seconds.

Speaker 23 Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Speaker 23 We work it out. Yeah.
Yeah.

Speaker 60 You're going to perform the next song that you're going to perform is coming where I'm from.

Speaker 33 So we're going to take a listen to that and then you come back over here and talk to to us about it.

Speaker 22 Let's do it, man. Let's do it.

Speaker 44 Hit.

Speaker 52 Y'all ready?

Speaker 52 Let's do it.

Speaker 46 Sitting here, guess I didn't make well.

Speaker 50 Got time and a story to tell.

Speaker 48 Starting when I was nine years old.

Speaker 46 Woke up and daddy was gone.

Speaker 25 I started hustling and couldn't tell me nothing.

Speaker 50 Running in the wood, trying to be somebody.

Speaker 44 My soul is on that stack.

Speaker 46 I was was searching for something.

Speaker 46 I try to be good.

Speaker 26 I try to keep from trouble.

Speaker 46 Living too fast.

Speaker 51 And trying to make good on a hustle.

Speaker 51 Sometimes I get rough.

Speaker 43 Time got more, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Speaker 43 Sometimes I gotta walk through it. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Speaker 43 Sometime I gotta do a little day, yeah.

Speaker 43 Only nothing but the love somebody.

Speaker 43 They don't wanna die young.

Speaker 43 Sorry, huh? Finally, my family

Speaker 25 to have kids. And do like my daddy did.

Speaker 20 Sometimes I get hard.

Speaker 20 Coming from where I'm from.

Speaker 20 fruit.

Speaker 20 Sometimes you gotta moan, yeah.

Speaker 20 Coming from outfruit.

Speaker 20 Sometimes you gotta cry a little bit louder.

Speaker 20 Coming from up front.

Speaker 20 Sometimes you have to fight the pain, yeah.

Speaker 20 Coming from what I'm from,

Speaker 20 sometimes you have to walk along.

Speaker 20 Coming from all front.

Speaker 20 Sometimes you do it every

Speaker 20 time you get a lot out of touch.

Speaker 20 Say I'm coming from.

Speaker 20 Sometimes I think I free a little bit too much.

Speaker 20 Lil blues, little blues on the shape.

Speaker 52 Come on back.

Speaker 37 Let's talk about this one.

Speaker 23 Yeah, this one right here. Yeah, we might have to go in on it.
Yeah.

Speaker 76 Man.

Speaker 23 Ah, yeah.

Speaker 22 You seem like you wrote this from a place of personal knowledge.

Speaker 28 Yeah.

Speaker 101 And some of the best songs come.

Speaker 35 You look at Gloria Gaynor.

Speaker 64 She went through something to say, I will survive.

Speaker 37 Lenny Williams, he was really hurt. People don't remember when the TV used to go off at midnight.

Speaker 102 Yeah.

Speaker 36 And all it wasn't up is that. Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 64 You talking about sometimes you got to do things.

Speaker 35 You got to cry a little harder when you come from where you come from. Yeah.

Speaker 32 Did, did, were there some circumstances that put you in a situation that you probably shouldn't have been in?

Speaker 23 Absolutely. Absolutely.
You know, and you know, my dad, we ended up being in our relationship for at least a good 20 years, but wasn't around like I needed him to. And I felt betrayed.

Speaker 23 And then I, you know, he broke my heart and some things he said to me.

Speaker 23 And so on that, when that happened to me, I was on a quest to

Speaker 23 make him see that he messed up.

Speaker 23 And so I grinded a little harder. Then my mom and I, we had some situations.
I ended up getting adopted when I was like 14 into a family.

Speaker 23 So that unstable situation in my life, you know, it made me work harder. It put a little pain in there, a little grit.
Yeah.

Speaker 23 So, you know, I probably would have sounded a little bit like Barry Manilow had that not happened.

Speaker 36 Yeah.

Speaker 68 That was pain.

Speaker 32 You mentioned your father wasn't around.

Speaker 55 So

Speaker 55 how old were you when he stopped coming around?

Speaker 69 Or was he ever around?

Speaker 23 He was around. I do remember, you know, a couple outfits.
And, you know, I spent the night a few times. But I was 16.
I wanted to go hang out. I wanted a few dollars.

Speaker 23 You know, he just told me he didn't have time for, you know, whatever. And at that that moment, I took it upon myself to make a decision.
It's like, you know what?

Speaker 23 I'm going to take myself out the equation. Okay.

Speaker 23 And,

Speaker 23 you know, it wasn't until I was about to get married.

Speaker 23 My ex wanted to meet him. So she's big on family.
So I called her. She's like, you're going to call your daddy and invite him out.
I said, uh-huh.

Speaker 28 I wasn't planning on it.

Speaker 54 Not really.

Speaker 23 But you know, I did.

Speaker 23 He was working at a golf course. And

Speaker 23 I went over, ended up getting in contact with him, went over, and I asked him, you know, hey, I'm about to get married. And, you know, she wanted to know if you

Speaker 23 would be around. I don't know.
I might have something to do.

Speaker 24 Damn. That's what he said.

Speaker 23 And so, even that, I was like, all right, here we go. Right.

Speaker 23 So we talked a little bit, and I told him when it was. And he was on the golf course.
He was driving off. And for whatever reason, I said, I love you.

Speaker 23 Wow. I said that.
Yes. And hadn't seen him in a little while.

Speaker 23 And he rode for a little minute. Love you too.
And from that, he came to the wedding. Wow.
And we've been cool. We've been cool ever since.
He just passed away last year. He was 81.

Speaker 23 Sorry to hear that. So I was there.
Yeah, absolutely. But he lived, you know.
A great life. And I was there, you know.
Yeah. I didn't never question him about why, whatnot.

Speaker 32 Why wasn't he there? No.

Speaker 23 I think that's, you know, I didn't need it. It wasn't going to make me better.
It wasn't going to change anything.

Speaker 35 You can't get up a lost time. We can just move forward from this point and move forward.

Speaker 32 I can't go back and get back what was lost.

Speaker 23 Nah, you can't. And I didn't want to waste the time trying to figure out something that neither one of us had the answers to.

Speaker 39 Is that what you really wanted to hear from your dad? You wanted your dad to tell you he loved you.

Speaker 68 You wanted to know that he loved you?

Speaker 101 I think so.

Speaker 23 I think, because at that moment, I felt like a little kid again.

Speaker 23 You know what I mean? And I didn't expect to say it.

Speaker 31 Right.

Speaker 23 No, absolutely not. I was like, what are you doing? Right.

Speaker 23 You know, but I'm glad I did.

Speaker 68 And it was,

Speaker 33 had you not been getting married, had your soon-to-be wife not pushed you to go ask your dad, would he be attending the wedding,

Speaker 33 would you have contacted or

Speaker 39 made the connection?

Speaker 23 I don't think it would have been the same if I had. It probably would have been probably at a funeral or something,

Speaker 23 but probably not in that, not in the same manner. Right.

Speaker 23 And maybe not. Right.

Speaker 60 You said

Speaker 53 your mom, you ended up getting adopted at 14.

Speaker 36 Yeah.

Speaker 68 So was your mom, so what happened in that situation that led you to be adopted by another family?

Speaker 23 Just my mom picking the wrong man, thinking it, you know, took her off her square.

Speaker 23 So she wasn't her best self for a little while. And so I needed to be somewhere stable because I knew I had to be this Anthony Hamilton that people hear now.
And so

Speaker 23 I just prayed hard.

Speaker 23 And God delivered the family I needed to be in.

Speaker 30 Did you always have this voice?

Speaker 57 Did you always know you wanted to be a singer?

Speaker 53 Do you always wanted to be an artist?

Speaker 38 Is that what you knew you always, it wasn't football, it wasn't basketball, it wasn't anything else?

Speaker 68 God gifted me this voice.

Speaker 23 You know what? When I was a little five, four, five years old, I always said, I'm going to be famous singing, but I didn't know what fame was. Right.
I just knew I wanted to do music. Right.

Speaker 23 Whether it be on, I thought being on a train, I was like, I always thought about getting on a train because I was fascinated by Amtrak. I'm going to go on a train.

Speaker 23 I'm just going to go to different places. I'm going to sing.

Speaker 23 And I just never stopped believing in that. And I just stayed with it and put it into work.
Actually, my dad was almost signed to Motown.

Speaker 28 Really?

Speaker 23 So I get my voice from my dad and my mom's side of the family, my uncle's. I went to a funeral, man, and you're talking about singing.
So Casey and JoJo are my family as well. Okay.

Speaker 23 So you're talking about some singing?

Speaker 30 Did y'all eat anything at the family union or just sing?

Speaker 57 Listen who could have.

Speaker 28 Look.

Speaker 23 I think I was so fascinated by the voices, I forgot I was hungry. So when I hit the road, my stone was growling.

Speaker 55 Like Johnson Family Vacation, how they got a

Speaker 68 Steve Harvey gets a woman that I think that was it what that said said entertaining yeah um

Speaker 23 do you have siblings yes I do my mom had three of us I'm the middle my brother's the younger my sister's the older and I have three brothers on my on my other family wow actually just met two other another

Speaker 23 set of siblings

Speaker 23 my dad at his funeral there was a a young lady and a and a And a man that came over and said, hey, I'm your brother. And they had a birth certificate with my dad's name on it.
But I didn't know.

Speaker 23 Right.

Speaker 23 I would have put him on the brochure. Exactly.

Speaker 57 He never mentioned that to you.

Speaker 23 I kind of remember the son's name vaguely. Okay.

Speaker 23 But not really. Right.
So now

Speaker 23 they'll call and I'm gone a lot. And so it's kind of weird for me to kind of just embrace it all the way.

Speaker 24 It's hard meeting somebody in the 50s and they're like, oh, I'm your brother. Yeah.

Speaker 35 And you just try to pick up.

Speaker 23 Yeah, yeah. But there's one daughter that I keep in contact with.
Okay. Pretty, pretty strong.
But they're nice. I'm trying.

Speaker 36 I'm trying. That's it.

Speaker 23 That's what I'm saying. It's just weird.
It's just weird.

Speaker 22 Is your mom still alive? No, she

Speaker 23 had cancer some years back.

Speaker 32 Did you make amends with your mom?

Speaker 64 Did you have a conversation with your mom and says, mom,

Speaker 37 I did what I did because I felt I wasn't going to make my ultimate destination because of some things that you had around.

Speaker 34 It wasn't you.

Speaker 102 It was what you were around that caused me to do what I did.

Speaker 23 You know,

Speaker 23 when she was transitioning, I was there. I had got her, I bought a house and put in a house, her first house with windows in the kitchen.

Speaker 23 And, you know, she was proud of me, and I was proud of her, too. She came a long way.
We all came a long way. She actually got on a plane to come see me in New York.
Had never flown before. Wow.

Speaker 23 She got on there to come see her baby.

Speaker 35 She got on the plane by herself, never flown before.

Speaker 23 Never. And came to see me.
I was living in Harlem at the time.

Speaker 23 But she came, yep. And we stayed in the city, in a hotel, and we actually went and had a beer together.

Speaker 27 Wow.

Speaker 23 Yeah.

Speaker 70 But yeah,

Speaker 23 I let that step go, man.

Speaker 70 Life is. Was it hard?

Speaker 23 To let it go? Yes.

Speaker 39 Because sometimes, you know, people hold on to things.

Speaker 38 And, you know, my grandma used to say, boy, teeth and tongue should fall out, but family never should fall out.

Speaker 38 You're going to go through things. Yeah.

Speaker 57 Yeah.

Speaker 68 But one day you're going to wake up and your parents aren't going to be there. Or a brother and sister are not going to be there.

Speaker 68 And you're going to say all the things you wish you had to say that you're never going to get an opportunity to say.

Speaker 23 Yeah, you know what? I think I've seen so many people miss that opportunity. I just didn't want to do that.
You know, sometimes you got to learn from somebody else's mistake.

Speaker 23 And so I was just like, I can't change it. Right.
You know, I'm pretty sure they went through their own hell. Yes.
And their own, you know, beating the self-so who am I?

Speaker 23 If I ain't God, don't act like it. And let's just start where we are.

Speaker 53 When you get on social media and you see them got, they have TikToks and they have videos about, man, Anthony Hamilton making songs with dudes got to walk to work.

Speaker 23 It's funny, man. It's encouraging, too, because, you know, people are not going to talk about something if it don't affect them.

Speaker 70 Correct.

Speaker 23 So they do the beer jokes and all that. I love it all.
I repost it, you know. Yeah.
You know, it's good to be special.

Speaker 68 Flaget tweeted, man, old school R ⁇ B really hits different.

Speaker 58 I'm listening to Charlene by Anthony Hamilton.

Speaker 72 Send more like this.

Speaker 22 Charlene was released in 2003.

Speaker 38 Flage was born in 2003.

Speaker 68 Kevin on stage said, make video for the heartbroken.

Speaker 45 Yeah, I'm heartbroken.

Speaker 64 And we talked, touched on this a little earlier.

Speaker 35 You're old school now.

Speaker 34 Like I said, it used to be Barry White, it was Petty Pendergrass, and it was all the Smokey Robinson.

Speaker 35 When we were kids, that was old school.

Speaker 42 Now you're thought of in that same breath, that old school RB, because

Speaker 35 you hear it it all the time, also.

Speaker 37 Man, RB dead.

Speaker 23 I ain't never been to no funeral.

Speaker 57 They didn't tell you nothing about it.

Speaker 69 You ain't got to be. No, man.
You ain't get the memo.

Speaker 23 No,

Speaker 23 I didn't get the wake time or the funeral time. I think

Speaker 23 the rendition or the style of RB that people are used to,

Speaker 23 it's in there. It's mixed in.
The young kids just have their own way of expressing themselves. And there's some good stuff out there.

Speaker 23 You know, I just think

Speaker 23 times change and stuff move. But the core of RB and the core of soul music, it's in every rap song you ever heard, every country song, every church record.
It's there.

Speaker 23 I don't think it'll ever go anywhere. There's nothing better.

Speaker 68 I think the RB that we're used to, because it used to be, a lot of people did RB.

Speaker 39 Yeah.

Speaker 33 How about this?

Speaker 32 Will RB ever be what it once was?

Speaker 23 I think they're coming back. I think you have

Speaker 23 some of the newer catch

Speaker 23 digging into into it. They're starting to sample a lot of 90s records.
They are.

Speaker 55 They are.

Speaker 23 And

Speaker 23 I think you're going to have to go back.

Speaker 23 Yeah, you can't keep dating so fast.

Speaker 23 They're going to get older. They want to slow it down.

Speaker 23 When the last time I slowded, I don't, you know.

Speaker 36 Bad, please.

Speaker 25 Come on, slow down.

Speaker 28 Only at a wedding.

Speaker 36 I mean, with the

Speaker 62 eighth grade,

Speaker 38 baby senior, you know.

Speaker 23 Yeah, we got to slow down. Maybe we'll vote different if we slow down.

Speaker 23 God told me, please.

Speaker 64 We moving moving too fast.

Speaker 23 Boy, they're moving too fast. We're running past the bull.

Speaker 45 You know?

Speaker 23 Too bad. We're running past the bull.

Speaker 35 I mean,

Speaker 68 when you sit back and look at you, you look back like where you started and where you are now.

Speaker 33 What are some of the differences that you see? Because, like I said, some of the old school guys, and now you're that old school guy.

Speaker 32 How have you tried to bridge the gap?

Speaker 23 You know what? I've done so many rap records. I've worked with, I have songs with, wow, Drake.
I just did another one with Buster Rhyme, a second one with him.

Speaker 23 Jada Kiss, Young Jeezy,

Speaker 23 NLE Chopper.

Speaker 23 So that keeps me bridging the gap.

Speaker 23 I sound like a sample, so they want to be a part of that soul world, and they know where to come and get it.

Speaker 23 You know, just like the tones.

Speaker 32 Right.

Speaker 23 Certain voices

Speaker 23 you can't duplicate.

Speaker 58 They know, but they know. Yeah.

Speaker 53 Some people like no matter what, man, that's such and such.

Speaker 70 Yeah.

Speaker 23 So I think that's an advantage I have just to sound so much like myself. That if you want that sound, you got to come to me.
You got to come to you. And so I always have a job.

Speaker 68 Do have you ever been in a situation if somebody sampled, and I asked LL, I've asked a lot of people that have had things sampled.

Speaker 30 Do you have to hear it before it comes out, or you just take their word for it that they go do you right?

Speaker 23 Look, I was just listening to something the other night I had never heard. Really? Yeah, so French Montana,

Speaker 23 him and the Coke boys, they did a

Speaker 23 Since I Sent You song of mine with

Speaker 23 Jeremiah and Jeremy. I just heard that.
Okay. And yeah, every now and again, you'll hear it.
It'll slip through, but they have to go through the label. Right.
If they're going to try to sell it.

Speaker 23 If they're just putting it out on the mixtape, that's cool. I don't even really sweat it.
You know what I mean?

Speaker 27 No.

Speaker 23 I mean,

Speaker 23 if it's Sharon or somebody like that, I want my money.

Speaker 24 You know?

Speaker 23 You know, certain artists, you know, they may not move the needle enough for it to really matter. Right.

Speaker 68 But if it's somebody gonna make some bread, I need to get a little something.

Speaker 21 Oh, yeah, I need a slice of that.

Speaker 23 Let me get that, Justin Bieber. Let me get that.

Speaker 23 Let me get that Jay-Z. Let me get it.

Speaker 23 But no, you can't. You got to pick and choose what's going, you know.

Speaker 21 When you and I was talking, and you said, if I come on Club Shea Shay, what's the one song?

Speaker 60 The one song you're going to want me to perform?

Speaker 64 Yeah.

Speaker 36 If I can only perform one,

Speaker 35 I said, Her heart.

Speaker 103 Man, I knew.

Speaker 23 I was like,

Speaker 35 that's what you tell.

Speaker 35 You tweet, you text me back. I knew it.

Speaker 2 Look,

Speaker 23 that song, man, it's super huge in South Africa.

Speaker 100 Okay.

Speaker 23 And even here in the States, it's just

Speaker 23 a song that was written from a real place. You know, I was cutting up.

Speaker 45 Ah.

Speaker 23 You know, I was out there. I was.

Speaker 35 You was out there bad at?

Speaker 23 Boy, I was, yeah.

Speaker 23 I was out there, man, and cutting up.

Speaker 39 Just trying to find my way, man.

Speaker 23 And, you know, not a bad person. just didn't always bad decision just made some decisions that was a little little bowlegged

Speaker 36 all right here he is he's gonna perform her heart anthony ample all right

Speaker 103 ah yeah

Speaker 39 i might crown this one i'm me too

Speaker 39 I had a habit of messing up

Speaker 48 staying out of late and getting drunk.

Speaker 47 I let you down a thousand times, broken promises.

Speaker 48 It's like I ran away from you.

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Speaker 99 My career was my excuse

Speaker 49 until I saw you about to drown in your own tears.

Speaker 43 And as you hide

Speaker 43 in my arms,

Speaker 48 you woke

Speaker 48 up my heart.

Speaker 48 And I

Speaker 47 sorghid

Speaker 48 what I found in you.

Speaker 47 Because her heart,

Speaker 47 her heart

Speaker 48 won't let me lose her.

Speaker 46 No matter how I try,

Speaker 48 I just can't say goodbye and lose her.

Speaker 49 When all the folks were said and done,

Speaker 48 you were there to welcome me home.

Speaker 49 I was convicted because your love never wavered.

Speaker 106 and I know you love me more than me,

Speaker 49 and you vowed to love through anything.

Speaker 106 I've never had the kind of love that was forever.

Speaker 44 And as you cried

Speaker 48 in my arms,

Speaker 46 you woke

Speaker 48 up my heart,

Speaker 48 and I

Speaker 48 saw up in

Speaker 48 what I found in you

Speaker 47 because her love,

Speaker 20 her love

Speaker 20 won't let me lose her,

Speaker 20 her love won't let me lose her.

Speaker 20 I try

Speaker 20 to say goodbye

Speaker 25 and lose her.

Speaker 25 No,

Speaker 47 said a heart won't let me lose.

Speaker 47 No matter how I try, no matter

Speaker 25 I can't say goodbye,

Speaker 106 No matter how I try,

Speaker 39 I felt that way. Hey, man.

Speaker 52 I felt that way.

Speaker 39 I had to feel it for years.

Speaker 84 Man.

Speaker 61 He said, you had a habit of messing up.

Speaker 57 I let you down a thousand times, broken promises.

Speaker 68 In a situation like that,

Speaker 22 my grandfather used to say, promises are like pie crust.

Speaker 39 They're thin and easily broken.

Speaker 70 Good. God almighty.

Speaker 33 When you make promises like that, babe, I'm going to do this, but then something comes up.

Speaker 73 There's only so many times she's going to accept something came up.

Speaker 53 You mentioned that, you know, you was acting up.

Speaker 63 You was all bow-legged out there.

Speaker 38 Yeah. Bow-legged and one leg.

Speaker 28 Not both with this one.

Speaker 27 Yeah. You a bad boy there.

Speaker 23 Yeah, I was gragging at once.

Speaker 2 So. Too often.
So how do you,

Speaker 35 how do you, how do you go to, how do you go to her, Anthony, and try to fix it?

Speaker 23 After a while, I just didn't try.

Speaker 103 You didn't. Oh.

Speaker 23 You know what I mean? I felt like. you know, my words were in vain.
You know, I had let you down too many times. And,

Speaker 23 you know, it's probably best for me to let you be and let you get what you deserve.

Speaker 31 Was it hard?

Speaker 23 Yeah, yeah, yeah, absolutely. You know?

Speaker 65 After you've been...

Speaker 68 Did you try to go back?

Speaker 55 Does this person know that this song is about her?

Speaker 23 I'm pretty sure they do.

Speaker 23 You know, the

Speaker 23 first time early

Speaker 23 in the relationship, you know, you try and you want to do better and you do good for a long, long, long time. And you go to church and you get double baptized.

Speaker 67 You're really trying.

Speaker 28 I really want to work, babe.

Speaker 23 You try. And I think, you know, you have to,

Speaker 23 maturity in different areas of your life come at different times.

Speaker 2 It does.

Speaker 23 When you're not sure of who you are, you don't know how to, you don't know how to be the best version of yourself at that point. So I was learning.
Even though I was a grown man, I was learning.

Speaker 23 You know, it was a different life. A lot throwed at you

Speaker 23 when you're in this arena.

Speaker 69 How hard was it to watch her cry?

Speaker 68 And to know that you're the reason for those tears?

Speaker 23 Pretty hard.

Speaker 23 You cry.

Speaker 23 You tie yourself to the bed and you watch the Passion of the Christ over and over again.

Speaker 23 You just try your best to just, I got to suffer too. Yeah, okay.
You know, I just put it on repeat.

Speaker 36 Yeah.

Speaker 23 You know.

Speaker 23 So, yeah,

Speaker 23 it's not a good feeling. You know, especially when your intentions are not right, hurting anyone, right?

Speaker 64 But how does the, I'm just trying to, how you put that together in a song.

Speaker 22 Like we were talking about it earlier, some of the best songs come from a place of hurt.

Speaker 2 Yeah. And

Speaker 35 although you weren't on the receiving end, you were hurting also

Speaker 64 because the person that you cared about, you were hurting her with your actions.

Speaker 34 And

Speaker 35 damn, baby, I'm hurting you, but I can't stop doing what I'm doing.

Speaker 35 That's the that's hard.

Speaker 23 You pour another one and you just you try to numb it. Yes.
You know, and you know, that could be a problem too. Yes.

Speaker 33 I was talking and I heard someone said a lesson not learned in blood

Speaker 32 is destined to be repeated. Yeah.

Speaker 39 So you've got to really, really hurt.

Speaker 68 You said something very interesting that, you know, A wise man learned from others' mistakes.

Speaker 37 A fool has to learn from his own.

Speaker 22 Yeah.

Speaker 35 You want to like see something, and you probably saw it in this industry.

Speaker 36 People had wives and had great relationships and messed it all up.

Speaker 35 And you probably said, man, that ain't going to be me.

Speaker 42 That ain't going to be me.

Speaker 64 I know what I got at home. And I'd be damn.

Speaker 64 If I didn't do the same thing that I said, I wouldn't let happen.

Speaker 23 You know, and that's, you know, that's why you have to humble yourself.

Speaker 23 A lot of times you do it.

Speaker 23 You get to a place where you feel like you're above,

Speaker 23 you know, those circumstances.

Speaker 24 Yes.

Speaker 23 And you move carelessly. And sometimes we, you know, God will try to get our attention in private, but sometimes we have to expose us so we can really pay attention.

Speaker 29 And, you know, I've been there.

Speaker 57 He said, I was trying to get your attention.

Speaker 68 Now I got your undivided attention.

Speaker 21 I had to sit you down.

Speaker 94 I said, can you turn that down?

Speaker 41 Is this thing on me?

Speaker 36 Cut somebody lights off.

Speaker 42 I said, can you turn that off?

Speaker 22 You said men use career as an excuse.

Speaker 23 Yeah.

Speaker 73 Isn't that a pretty good excuse?

Speaker 23 It is when it, when it's, when it's, you know, genuine.

Speaker 23 But when, you know, you're at the studio, but you're not at the studio.

Speaker 53 That's not a good excuse.

Speaker 28 It's not a good excuse.

Speaker 23 You look at, you look at, you at the light, and they're at the light too.

Speaker 2 It's just not.

Speaker 42 Oh, man.

Speaker 2 Affordable studio, huh?

Speaker 101 Damn. I mean, that's just, I just made that up.
Yeah, you made that up, bill.

Speaker 37 He wasn't that, he wasn't that reckless now.

Speaker 23 No, no, no. No, no.
It wasn't too bad. I was pretty good.

Speaker 35 Men cry.

Speaker 33 I mean, sometimes, you know, men say, say, man, I can't cry.

Speaker 22 That's a sign of weakness.

Speaker 35 That's the upteenth vulnerability.

Speaker 33 And a lot of times men have a hard time being vulnerable in front of someone they care about because they don't want the woman to use that against them.

Speaker 23 You know what? I've done it.

Speaker 51 I think

Speaker 23 during the Charlene days, I felt like...

Speaker 23 They were taking advantage of my tears.

Speaker 23 They saw it as a sign of weakness.

Speaker 23 And the minute I was able to get my strength enough to get up and get out and get back on my feet, I had to realize like,

Speaker 23 wow, maybe that wasn't the person I thought they were

Speaker 23 in those situations, you know. But now I cry, I cry on stage, I'll cry whatever.
Right. You know, if it hits me, it hits me.

Speaker 75 Is it a situation, if I tell you, it doesn't matter, man to woman, woman to man.

Speaker 22 If I tell you something in confidence, if I tell you something that made me vulnerable,

Speaker 35 should the other person ever bring that up and use that against them?

Speaker 23 If you have bad intentions, yeah. But if you really care about that person, I think that's certain things that stay within the ring that you guys

Speaker 23 created.

Speaker 32 Because you know that,

Speaker 102 okay.

Speaker 32 So I know how he feels.

Speaker 33 I know how she feels about that. And I know if I bring that up,

Speaker 33 I know the kind of response it's going to elicit.

Speaker 23 Yeah, that's control in a way. You want to be able to have control of their triggers triggers so you can manipulate their emotion.
And next thing, you know, whatever you're going to get out of it,

Speaker 23 you get it for as long as you can until they catch on. Until they catch on.

Speaker 33 You know what? It's funny that you say that.

Speaker 68 My grandfather used to have a saying: say, Boy, you got to be careful to let people know what makes you tick.

Speaker 58 They'll wind you up and make you tick when they want you to.

Speaker 24 Yeah, he lied.

Speaker 36 Like, hold on, I ain't want to do that.

Speaker 61 It's like, you know, what was that?

Speaker 62 Do the right thing when Marvel would tell Gator, come down, Gator, hit that dance for me, Gator, hit that dance for me, Gaylord.

Speaker 53 And Gator would hit that dance for it.

Speaker 23 Yeah.

Speaker 36 But

Speaker 58 a man crying,

Speaker 22 is that a sign of weakness or a sign of strength?

Speaker 23 I think it's a sign of freedom.

Speaker 23 I think if you're free, you can express yourself.

Speaker 103 Yeah. Yeah.

Speaker 23 And whether you're weak for a moment, that's fine.

Speaker 36 Yes.

Speaker 23 You know, I think we have this thing of men,

Speaker 23 you can't be weak and you can't have a day off of being strong. And I think that's, that's why, you know, so many people blow their brains out or get on drugs or you know, don't make it back.

Speaker 52 Right.

Speaker 23 Because just one or two days off from being, you know, from not being Superman is okay.

Speaker 32 Right. Is that a thing that men feel that they have to be Superman, but they have to wear that armor?

Speaker 33 They don't want someone to see them in a vulnerable state because, as you mentioned, sometimes people see you in a vulnerable state and they feel they can take advantage of it.

Speaker 23 Absolutely. And, you know,

Speaker 23 it's looked at as weakness.

Speaker 70 Right. Or

Speaker 23 a lack of

Speaker 23 whatever it is that makes you a man. And I don't think that's the truth at all.

Speaker 39 In the song I cry, Mama told me that men, that man's own tears can make him strong.

Speaker 32 Yeah.

Speaker 23 It does. It makes you strong.

Speaker 23 You start to feel alive and you start seeing where my strengths are, where my weaknesses are. And then you get to know yourself.
So now you maneuver and you move a different way.

Speaker 23 And, you know,

Speaker 23 not to the beat of somebody else's drum, not to the,

Speaker 23 you know, somebody else's emotions. Like you said, a ticking.
Yes. Yeah.
So once you learn yourself,

Speaker 23 you move on your own. Right.

Speaker 65 So when you were in school, when you were in school, Anthony, so what type of, what type of student, what type of person were you when you were younger?

Speaker 23 I could have absolute donkey in class.

Speaker 23 And I'm getting it back.

Speaker 74 One of my.

Speaker 74 You know, I was good.

Speaker 23 I was respectful, but I was a clown. Yeah.
I'm really silly. You hear these songs, people think he's all, you know, he's just, he's too deep.

Speaker 23 But now I'm a clown. I'm silly.
You know, I like the attention of making people laugh. Laugh.
You know, I like to make people laugh.

Speaker 68 So, what did the teacher say, Anthony, get out of class?

Speaker 23 Yep.

Speaker 27 Yep.

Speaker 23 Get out. Go to the office.
Right. You know, back then you get paddled.
Oh, yeah, for sure.

Speaker 27 Yeah.

Speaker 57 That's probably why some of the kids got bad because they ain't no paddling.

Speaker 58 And parents ain't.

Speaker 68 No. Oh, we're talking now.
We put your time out.

Speaker 36 No time up.

Speaker 40 You've been after the food.

Speaker 23 Time up.

Speaker 54 I like that.

Speaker 46 So

Speaker 23 I was down in a place called Maxton, North Carolina. Okay.

Speaker 23 Biker

Speaker 23 rally thinging.

Speaker 23 So my boys, I took my boys with me. And you know, it's older guys.
Some of them probably had been in the Army. And they got the tussling and all that.
So there really wasn't no kids out there.

Speaker 23 They got the tussling and that energy. Older man was like, hey, hey, now.

Speaker 23 Hey, y'all cut that out. All that, all that energy.
You know, and sometimes

Speaker 23 you have to really, really allow the community to

Speaker 23 be a part of raising your kids and raising you. And

Speaker 23 like you said, learning from your mistakes, that was a moment that they learned. I had told them already.
You have to watch your energy because your energy can affect somebody else.

Speaker 23 And at that moment, that was a teachable moment for me to let them know, like, this is what I was trying trying to tell you. And so it took somebody outside of the household to be that parental voice.

Speaker 23 And they didn't even know this man, but I just wanted them to feel like a sense of, like, when I grew up,

Speaker 23 how we were raised.

Speaker 24 Yeah.

Speaker 23 It took the community. It didn't have to be your parent who would discipline you.
It didn't have to be someone that knew you per se, but it was just the fact that

Speaker 23 we were were able to teach outside of the house. And nowadays, the kids, they'll shoot you or kill you if you say anything to them.
So it's a different day and time.

Speaker 21 It's funny that you say that, Anthony, because we were having a conversation. Ocho and I was having a conversation on Nightcap, how to community.

Speaker 39 If you were doing something wrong,

Speaker 66 aren't you Mary and Barney grandboys?

Speaker 73 Which one of you, you Shannon or Spanky?

Speaker 28 I'm Shannon.

Speaker 57 Hey, do they know you down here?

Speaker 23 Yeah.

Speaker 35 All right. Stop all that cursing.
Stop all that talking.

Speaker 23 Yeah.

Speaker 23 You know, it, and it, it shocked my boys, you know. I was like, that's old school training.
Yes. That's how it should be.
You know, the younger generation,

Speaker 23 they're missing that.

Speaker 32 You got another song, Cornbread, Fish, and Collard Greens.

Speaker 23 I'm hungry, too.

Speaker 72 That seemed like a dish.

Speaker 57 That seemed like your favorite dish.

Speaker 23 You know what? And I think it is one of my favorite dishes, but I think it represents.

Speaker 23 different things. The cornbread,

Speaker 23 you know, it's the foundation. Yes.
Solid.

Speaker 38 Got to get something to stick to your reels, boy.

Speaker 23 And then greens, keep it, keep things clean around there. Yeah.
And then fish, you learn how to move.

Speaker 31 Right.

Speaker 23 So, yeah.

Speaker 31 You want to talk about it? Yeah, y'all want you to perform it. Then we're going to see, we're going to talk, we're going to dive in deeper.

Speaker 27 All right.

Speaker 36 Tartar sauce or hot sauce?

Speaker 31 Uh, hot sauce. All right.

Speaker 23 You all right. You all right.

Speaker 23 Cold sloth.

Speaker 56 No, no cold sloth.

Speaker 70 Oh, man. I thought you were.

Speaker 31 Give me HB Hunter Puppies.

Speaker 24 Okay.

Speaker 24 You brought yourself back.

Speaker 26 Check it. Bad thing that I said at the back.
Keeping you out, the way you act, ain't restrained attack. You're getting out of line, and I'm yanking you back in your place.

Speaker 26 All is well, and all is cool.

Speaker 105 Stay in your place, don't be no fool.

Speaker 100 Get along alright.

Speaker 26 You look like the gyps that will try to bite.

Speaker 26 Best off been a friend to me.

Speaker 51 You don't want to offend me, better play it cool.

Speaker 26 Don't know what I might do.

Speaker 51 Corn red fish ain't cargo.

Speaker 25 I got what you need

Speaker 100 if you want it.

Speaker 50 Cause I'm a pimp, babe,

Speaker 26 cause I'm a pimp girl.

Speaker 2 I got what you need.

Speaker 51 I can rock and whirl.

Speaker 46 I'm using Jerry girl.

Speaker 26 You can walk around like your shit don't stay.

Speaker 51 I'm only you.

Speaker 26 Oh, baby girl, I'm on you.

Speaker 105 Take it slow, change the speed.

Speaker 51 If it's food for God, that you really need.

Speaker 26 But I'll stage it plain.

Speaker 26 Get with it, stay in in lane stop swerve back

Speaker 26 take a seat and sit in the back i don't appreciate the way you act you need to fix yourself hurry up and go fix yourself

Speaker 26 can't kill nothing want nothing die everything's gonna pass you by if you don't wise enough

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Speaker 82 So, the last time you had a trans guy on here, and you were saying at the top of the episode that you've hooked up with trans guys, but you haven't.

Speaker 84 Okay, she's chasing, but

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Speaker 89 They're like, I don't want to feel like I'm fetishizing anyone.

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Speaker 26 Cause I'm I'm a pimp, baby.

Speaker 25 Cause I'm a pimp, baby.

Speaker 25 If you want

Speaker 20 you, if you want it for me,

Speaker 20 let me take you there.

Speaker 20 Come on, get with it right now.

Speaker 20 Can't you go, baby?

Speaker 20 I got a hat

Speaker 106 because I'm a pimp, baby,

Speaker 25 cause I'm a pimp.

Speaker 25 Go and play fishing holly.

Speaker 23 Time to eat.

Speaker 21 You said this song is about approaching a woman.

Speaker 64 I think I said, like,

Speaker 22 I forget where I read it at, but it says like only 25%, I think it's like from eight,

Speaker 72 some local kids now, have never asked a woman a person out on a date.

Speaker 41 Wow.

Speaker 72 And you see on social media, they'll be standing right next to a person.

Speaker 34 Hey, send me this person.

Speaker 37 Who is this person?

Speaker 42 Find this person.

Speaker 2 Bro, you were standing right there.

Speaker 35 You were standing right next to the guy.

Speaker 35 Excuse me. What's your name?

Speaker 41 Excuse me.

Speaker 34 What happened to being able to walk up to someone?

Speaker 35 We're at a different time now, so you have to be careful.

Speaker 37 Yeah.

Speaker 35 Walking up to someone and says, hey, my name is Shannon.

Speaker 33 How are you doing? What's your name?

Speaker 23 I think social media kind of messed up the intimate. part of getting to know people.
Yes. You know, you don't want to do the work.
You want the instant gratification.

Speaker 23 So I think just pushing a button is easier than me finding out

Speaker 23 what she really likes. And, you know, just interacting with somebody.
Well,

Speaker 32 computers.

Speaker 68 I think the thing is, Anthony, also, is that when you look at a person and you watch what they post, we feel after we see 15, 20 posts, we kind of know what that person likes.

Speaker 68 We kind of know who that person is.

Speaker 68 Instead of doing the deep dive and doing the homework, we just taking a snapshot of what we see.

Speaker 29 Okay, they post this, they're eating there, they're in this, they're in that.

Speaker 22 Okay, so that's what that person likes to do.

Speaker 57 Have no idea. That could be a lot of this.

Speaker 29 Look, social media is not real.

Speaker 70 Absolutely. They post the best stuff.

Speaker 23 They post the best stuff. Yes.
And the story is, you know, that story probably happened five years ago. You know, all you got to do is put it, put a filter on it.

Speaker 38 I mean, everybody on social media got me feeling broke.

Speaker 59 They in the Maldives.

Speaker 67 They everywhere out there in South Africa. They got all these cars.
They eating at these nice restaurants. I'm looking at my pocket.

Speaker 73 I say, man,

Speaker 55 got a hole in my pocket.

Speaker 23 Look, I see all the time, if I see one more broke person outliving me,

Speaker 23 I'm going to, look, I got to change my life, man.

Speaker 45 Yes. Yeah.

Speaker 100 But

Speaker 35 when,

Speaker 32 maybe it was always like this, but we didn't have social media to be able to judge.

Speaker 34 But when do we become so obsessed with impressing the other person?

Speaker 23 You know what? I think it goes way back before we got here. You know, you know, we...

Speaker 23 We want to be accepted. I think wanting to be accepted and feeling like you've been broken away from what's truly

Speaker 23 important and you know when you're told that you're not this, you're not that, you're not worthy, then you want to express yourself in a way that you make people feel like you got it all. Right.

Speaker 23 And that's not the case. I think you spend more time trying to show off to people that are not even looking.

Speaker 2 If you

Speaker 23 they ain't really looking at you? No.

Speaker 54 No.

Speaker 53 Not really.

Speaker 68 If you knew how little people cared about you, they don't give up.

Speaker 24 You would care less than what they thought about you. absolutely.

Speaker 68 But people go out of their way because people actually think people actually care

Speaker 68 about what they do, what they say, they don't.

Speaker 22 And if they do, it's infantic, that quick.

Speaker 23 Yeah, now they're on to the next

Speaker 23 and not giving the dog about that person.

Speaker 29 Being from North Carolina, obviously, soul food.

Speaker 36 I mean, North Carolina have real, but you get a meal.

Speaker 35 If somebody says, okay, Anthony, I'm we're gonna cook

Speaker 57 Sunday dinner.

Speaker 31 Yeah, what you having having to prepare?

Speaker 23 Shew, man, Sunday dinner. Okay, definitely potato salad.

Speaker 70 Okay. With eggs in it.

Speaker 42 Okay.

Speaker 39 Peanuts with raisins on it.

Speaker 23 Man,

Speaker 36 come on, Fido. Come here, Fido.

Speaker 23 Fido gonna get that. You know, I like turkey wing, baked turkey wing.
Okay. And fried fish.

Speaker 41 Catfish?

Speaker 64 Whiting?

Speaker 71 Mullet. Croker.
Croca.

Speaker 27 Croca.

Speaker 45 Ah, cowboy.

Speaker 23 Perch, whiting. Disney.

Speaker 36 Country, country.

Speaker 2 Yeah.

Speaker 23 Yeah.

Speaker 36 I'm talking about you corn carb in the out-house country.

Speaker 23 You know, I want gravy under the rice and on top of the rice.

Speaker 64 I thought this man was going to say, this man said whiting.

Speaker 35 This man said croaker.

Speaker 37 This man said perch.

Speaker 2 Yeah.

Speaker 101 You know, you can get into the rich snapper little laugh.

Speaker 36 But, you know,

Speaker 37 you don't want no sea bands, no dober soles.

Speaker 101 I mean, that's fine. That's, you know, you get this one.
But they ain't for Sunday dinner.

Speaker 23 Now that's Sunday.

Speaker 37 You want it, fry?

Speaker 35 You want it to come right about the grease?

Speaker 23 Not when my socks, when them dusty socks are out.

Speaker 23 I want that. I want that real deal.

Speaker 102 So are you,

Speaker 37 you,

Speaker 59 so you're not, so you're a fish type of guy.

Speaker 37 You don't eat meat, red meat?

Speaker 23 I haven't had red meat in some years, but I'm about to backslide and get some oxtails.

Speaker 103 I'm just saying it.

Speaker 101 I'm just saying.

Speaker 35 But they're doing too much with oxtails right now. They're putting oxtails in tacos.
They're putting them in cases.

Speaker 36 They put oxtail in everything.

Speaker 67 everything ain't meant to have oxtails in it yeah you can't have oxtail ravioli

Speaker 36 they got oxtail and grits now come on no no that might be good now come on come on i'm having a sand it's a little weird shrimp and grits yeah uh uh fishy grits all that

Speaker 23 but you want some oxtails and grits i mean oxtails so good you can just yeah i'll put them on white bread and hand the bar

Speaker 23 hold that bread and cook the knuckles so the bread come through here see i figure that's how you go with fish.

Speaker 36 They come right up by the green.

Speaker 28 Oh, I have the white bread right there.

Speaker 23 Put it right there. I just had some down at Maxedon.

Speaker 23 They put the white bread on there, the sugar fries, coleslaw. I didn't get the coleslaw.

Speaker 2 I had the hot sauce. Yeah.

Speaker 44 God dogged it.

Speaker 2 So that much. Mustard?

Speaker 42 You put mustard on your fish? Right around the side. Come on, shit.
No, I just want hot sauce.

Speaker 41 You got to, come on,

Speaker 22 try it, man. I'm telling you.

Speaker 64 But I can't. I mean, I can't.
I don't think I had croaker or mullet or whiting since.

Speaker 22 Nah, see, that is, see, they got bones in it.

Speaker 64 I don't want that, though. I almost choked on the bone.
I just started eating fish.

Speaker 32 I just started eating fish probably about 10 years ago.

Speaker 68 You know what?

Speaker 24 Bone got me.

Speaker 65 Get a whole loaf of bread, try to get it out.

Speaker 36 You know,

Speaker 67 you got to eat that bread to get it out.

Speaker 23 I had one that got stuck here when I was little, and I didn't eat fish for about at least about 10 years.

Speaker 38 Yeah, absolutely.

Speaker 23 I'm back. But the other day, I was at home, eating a little too fast.
The bone was right.

Speaker 23 Got that bread there. I thought I was a golden doodle, but I was trying to get it out of there.

Speaker 23 Yeah, yeah, I did. I had to, but thank God it didn't, man.
Because I was like, man, I'm enjoying fish. Yeah.
You know, I've been through that. But it's scary.

Speaker 103 Right.

Speaker 53 So you stopped eating red meat.

Speaker 21 Was there any particular reason that you stopped eating red meat?

Speaker 23 I went vegan for two and a half years. Okay.
How was that?

Speaker 23 It was good. You know, at that moment, I was trying to figure out the healthiest stuff to eat.
Okay. Because everything vegan ain't good.
No. That stuff got more stuff in it than anything.
Exactly.

Speaker 23 So if you're doing like raw and real stuff, then that's healthy. You know, the Beyond and all that, different burgers.

Speaker 23 It's okay to transition and have some time, but you can't make that a lifestyle either. So I just wanted to clean up, clean up a little bit.
I said, you can't have liquor and all the meats.

Speaker 36 You pick and choose. You choose what I choose, why I choose.

Speaker 66 You can't choose.

Speaker 28 You can't have all the bad habits.

Speaker 23 I did it, Ma.

Speaker 23 You know. Yeah, you just have to pick and choose.
You can't put everything. You got to have a good balance.

Speaker 29 One of your big breaks in the industry came, if I'm not mistaken, you were a backup singer for D'Angelo, correct?

Speaker 41 Yeah, yeah. And

Speaker 35 how did that, because I think Luther was a

Speaker 22 backup singer for Roberta Flatt.

Speaker 33 And there have been a lot of people that started out as backups and they all moved to the front.

Speaker 37 How do you think that helped your career?

Speaker 23 You know what, man? That was one of the

Speaker 23 most,

Speaker 23 man,

Speaker 23 just most exciting and just the deepest learning I've ever done. Like, I didn't go to a four-year college, but I felt like that was a university that you couldn't even pay to get in.

Speaker 23 You had Pino Palladino, you had Roy Hargrove, Jacques Schwarzbach, and Russell Gunn, all these Dante Winslow.

Speaker 23 And so for me to learn what true musicianship is, how to control the stage,

Speaker 23 how the band should play, the dynamics, and all the things I learned, I saw the world.

Speaker 23 through

Speaker 23 a different lens. And I was able to learn how to lead from learning how to follow.

Speaker 23 You know what I mean? He was a great leader.

Speaker 23 He knew music.

Speaker 23 Like deep, deep.

Speaker 23 He was an alien. Right.
It was just like Prince and James Brown and cats who just come once in a lifetime, once or twice. Yeah.

Speaker 23 D'Angelo was one of those.

Speaker 55 How did this happen?

Speaker 57 How did you go?

Speaker 29 How did it happen that you ended up being

Speaker 38 a singer in Istanbul?

Speaker 23 When I was signing Uptown, I had an album called Ecstasy. They spelled it XTC and I hated it.
But it was called Ecstasy. And

Speaker 23 Keidar Maxenberg was working with him at the time. And so he would come over to Tony Polk in the studio and play Brown Sugar.
And we would play a few songs off of Ecstasy.

Speaker 23 And so it was almost like a rival. And when my album never came out, he asked, hey, what was that guy that was supposed to have

Speaker 23 come out around the time? He said, man, he's not doing a deal for you. I threw

Speaker 23 if I would do background.

Speaker 23 And at this moment, I was assigned to Soul Life. Sunshine Anderson had heard it all before, and it was all

Speaker 23 taking over the world. And I begged my label to let me go out.

Speaker 23 I said, it'll make me a better artist if you let me, please let me go out and sing background. Now, I was intimidated.

Speaker 36 Yeah.

Speaker 23 Because, you know, my musical ear and stuff is not as

Speaker 23 intricate as his, isn't it? All the detailed backgrounds and the timing on it, you know, I'm just bread and water, black and white. Right.
And so I had to learn a lot.

Speaker 23 I had to really pay attention, but it made me sharper. It just made me a better artist all around.

Speaker 30 Why wasn't that hard?

Speaker 53 Because here you are,

Speaker 69 you're on your own, you're standalone, and you're wanting to go out and be a back, you wanted to be a background singer to someone else.

Speaker 30 You didn't feel that that was insulting?

Speaker 23 No, I put my ego aside. I felt like, you know,

Speaker 23 this is a different movement.

Speaker 23 You know, to be a part of this, this is going to be history.

Speaker 70 Right.

Speaker 23 A different type of history. And to be a part of that, man, I was like, only a fool would turn that down.

Speaker 38 Wow. You actually performed one time with him.

Speaker 31 How does it feel? Correct?

Speaker 22 You go on stage?

Speaker 23 Absolutely. Every night for over a year.

Speaker 23 We toured the whole world, Brazil, everywhere. We did a European tour for...
shoot

Speaker 23 four three four months right two months however long we were gone we were gone a long time.

Speaker 68 You still kind of do a rendition of it, right?

Speaker 23 Yeah, man. I love that guy, man.
I want to make sure his music lives in my house and everybody else's house as long as I can.

Speaker 54 All right.

Speaker 31 You're going to perform. How does it feel?

Speaker 68 And then we're going to get back and talk about D'Angelo and your relationship.

Speaker 23 Absolutely. Let's do it.

Speaker 52 Alrighty.

Speaker 37 How does it feel?

Speaker 37 Girl, it's all of you.

Speaker 45 Have it your way.

Speaker 84 And if you want,

Speaker 52 you can decide.

Speaker 41 And if you have me,

Speaker 52 I can provide

Speaker 52 everything

Speaker 52 that you desire, babe.

Speaker 46 Let me get a feeling

Speaker 46 a feeling that I feel

Speaker 46 here.

Speaker 46 Won't you come closer

Speaker 46 to me, baby?

Speaker 46 Said you already got me

Speaker 46 right where you want me, girl

Speaker 46 I just wanna be your man

Speaker 46 How does it feel

Speaker 46 how it feels, yeah

Speaker 46 Said I wanna feel

Speaker 46 now

Speaker 46 How does it feel?

Speaker 46 I wanna take you away from here, baby. God does it, babe.

Speaker 46 Take a back of my little wheel back on home.

Speaker 46 And how does it be here?

Speaker 46 What I'm talking about, baby.

Speaker 46 God does it.

Speaker 46 Ah, man.

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Speaker 29 It's good to be right.

Speaker 68 What do you remember about the first time that you met D'Angelo?

Speaker 23 I remember him being excited about me,

Speaker 23 which was kind of, you know,

Speaker 23 kind of cool. Right.
Seeing that he was just so, so amazing, man. And at that moment, Bilal was actually singing background with us as well.
Really?

Speaker 23 Yeah, it was me, Bilal, and Karen Karen Bernard who were singing background. That's the first

Speaker 23 set of background singers.

Speaker 31 Damn, D'Angelo had some hitters.

Speaker 23 Yeah, man. And, you know, just,

Speaker 23 he was excited, and he was just like fans of every texture that we brought to the table.

Speaker 68 And you guys remained in touch.

Speaker 22 You guys were friends.

Speaker 22 But unfortunately, you missed the last time he, the last phone call.

Speaker 35 Did you know he was sick?

Speaker 23 No, I didn't know, man. I hadn't.

Speaker 23 I found out maybe

Speaker 100 oh

Speaker 23 i found out maybe

Speaker 23 two two or three weeks before two weeks before

Speaker 23 he his passing but he had called me like a week prior to that and i was in the dressing room getting ready and i heard the phone i said i'll get in a minute i went i said oh i said this is d because i put his name under something right different yeah

Speaker 23 i put it under d bully yeah uh and uh

Speaker 23 I said, man, that's D. I know that's D'Angelo.

Speaker 23 So I called him back a few times, and

Speaker 23 he didn't pick up.

Speaker 70 Yeah.

Speaker 39 You think about what he wanted to say?

Speaker 68 Obviously, you didn't know he was sick. You didn't know this would possibly be the last time that you guys would ever talk.

Speaker 35 Yeah.

Speaker 68 You have that regret of not answering that call?

Speaker 23 You know what?

Speaker 23 It's not, because we talk so much, and I just kind of know kind of how it would probably start off.

Speaker 23 He called me Aunt Jeezy.

Speaker 2 Aunt Jeezy.

Speaker 23 And,

Speaker 23 you know,

Speaker 23 I think his spirit is speaking to me. Yes.

Speaker 70 Yeah, I think I kind of know what he would say.

Speaker 23 I don't think he would have poured all the heavy stuff on me. No.
But he would let me know, like, man, I appreciate you. I love you.
And, you know.

Speaker 31 Right.

Speaker 53 Where were you when you got the news that he had passed?

Speaker 23 I was,

Speaker 24 we were on the road. Yeah, I think

Speaker 23 right before, wasn't it? Right before the Atlanta show. I had a show in Atlanta.
Yeah.

Speaker 68 He died of pancreatic cancer.

Speaker 39 Why is that so important for black men to get tested early?

Speaker 23 Because if you catch something early enough, there's a chance that you can beat it. Yep.
You know, with proper diet and, you know, and, you know, medical attention.

Speaker 23 I think some stuff we can turn it around. Yes.
We got a better chance.

Speaker 31 Yes.

Speaker 31 I was

Speaker 21 caught prostate cancer early.

Speaker 31 Wow. So

Speaker 33 my father died at 39.

Speaker 39 He had two brothers that didn't make it to 50 of cancer.

Speaker 31 So I knew based on that, I had a high probability.

Speaker 68 So I started getting tested at 35.

Speaker 39 Wow, that's good.

Speaker 29 Went in for a routine. It's like, you know what?

Speaker 58 You're at the age.

Speaker 21 We're going to do a colonoscopy.

Speaker 39 Okay. Nope.

Speaker 58 We don't think anything, no symptoms.

Speaker 33 PSA level is fine.

Speaker 21 Come back.

Speaker 68 My doctor, the urologist,

Speaker 35 he didn't call me.

Speaker 22 It was someone else that called. So now

Speaker 102 my antenna's up.

Speaker 102 I'm like, okay.

Speaker 22 He's always called me when everything's okay.

Speaker 33 Now I'm somebody else is like, this is such and such.

Speaker 2 I was like, okay, okay.

Speaker 33 You see, like, Mr. Sharp, we did fine.

Speaker 39 We think you're fine right now. Yeah.

Speaker 33 But we're just going to monitor it. And

Speaker 22 a couple of months later, I went in, got everything taken care of, and I've been smoothed ever since.

Speaker 23 That's good man you know i just did a colonoscopy uh endoscopy got all my heart did all yeah yep yep ekg oh yeah ultrasound all internal organs i did all a yeah yeah what these premiums cost

Speaker 36 yeah yeah

Speaker 57 i'll be the a i'll be in there

Speaker 23 i'm getting everything hey i'm getting my buddy work yeah yeah you have to man you you know

Speaker 23 you know when i speak out about you know getting your colonoscopy and all that yeah getting all that stuff checked out so i'm you know i'm getting my grown man checkups, yeah, and it feels good.

Speaker 23 You can rest because there was a moment when I wasn't going, it's like, I don't trust the doctor, I don't trust them doctors, they're trying to kill me anyway. Uh,

Speaker 23 but you know, you have to

Speaker 23 know what you should be working on, if anything, right?

Speaker 31 You know, so maybe you have to change your eating habits, and you know, you know, we hard, you know, it's hard, it's hard because we've ate, you've eaten a certain way for so long.

Speaker 21 And I remember my grandmother, her, you know, her last couple years, she's like, baby,

Speaker 68 granny gonna die anyway, go get me some fried shrimp.

Speaker 71 I know, that's right.

Speaker 28 And so, you know what?

Speaker 72 I was like, you know what?

Speaker 68 Hey, we sneaky, go get a pride.

Speaker 21 She was 89 years of age. Oh, man.

Speaker 23 She had a nice, that's a nice run, man.

Speaker 38 A great life. Yeah, it's a great life.

Speaker 59 This concludes the first half of my conversation.

Speaker 35 Part two is also posted, and you can access it to whichever podcast platform you just listen to part one on.

Speaker 33 Just simply go back to Club Shether profile, and I'll see you there.

Speaker 41 Okay,

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Club Shay Shay - Anthony Hamilton Part 1

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