Into the Wilde | Wildemount Wildlings Episode 2 Part 1

Speaker 1 Tron Aries has arrived. I would like you to meet Aries, the ultimate AI soldier.
He is biblically strong and supremely intelligent.

Speaker 4 You think you're in control of this?

Speaker 6 You're not.

Speaker 7 On October 10th. What are you?

Speaker 8 My world is coming to destroy yours, but I can help you.

Speaker 6 The war for our world begins in IMAX.

Speaker 10 Tron Aries, suited PG-13. Maybe inappropriate for children under 13.
Only in theaters, October 10th. Get tickets now.

Speaker 11 Going up.

Speaker 12 Prices keep going up these days.

Speaker 14 It feels like being on an elevator that only goes up.

Speaker 15 Going up.

Speaker 16 But not at Metro.

Speaker 17 We're pushing the down button.

Speaker 11 Going down.

Speaker 18 We've lowered prices. Get one line of 5G data for $40.

Speaker 20 Period. That's 20% lower.

Speaker 21 And you get a free Samsung 5G phone when you bring your number.

Speaker 7 Only at Metro.

Speaker 22 Five-year guarantee on eligible plans, exclusion supplies.

Speaker 15 See website for details. Not available if that Metro with T-Mobile in the past six months.

Speaker 23 Tax supplies.

Speaker 24 your sausage mcmuffin with egg didn't change your receipt did the sausage mcmuffin with egg extra value meal includes a hash brown and a small coffee for just five dollars only at mcdonald's for a limited time prices and participation may vary

Speaker 27 Hey there, Critical Role podcast listeners.

Speaker 28 We have a special new membership service at beacon.tv where you can get early access to all new podcast episodes, including Critical Role Role for the first time ever.

Speaker 28 Beacon members also get things like event pre-sales, merch discounts, access to a private community Discord, and new exclusive series like Critical Role Cooldown, where we riff after the show.

Speaker 27 Think of it as our digital Critical Role land.

Speaker 28 Head on over to beacon.tv to check it out for yourself and start a seven-day free trial. Thank you so, so much for your support, for being a podcast listener, and for being a part of our community.

Speaker 30 Hey there, critters.

Speaker 31 We are so excited to share with you our brand new podcast from the world of Xandria, the Reslayer's Take.

Speaker 31 In this audio adventure, you'll be guided through the wild continent of Asilra, home to some of the most dangerous creatures.

Speaker 31 Here, the Slayer's Take is the most notorious monster hunting group in the realm.

Speaker 31 But, when previously slain creatures start returning from the grave, it's up to six misfit mercenaries to band together and re-slay these supernatural threats as the re-slayers take.

Speaker 31 So come follow along these audio escapades as the second coolest monster hunters this side of Xandria battle a growing undead army of dangerous creatures.

Speaker 31 The party is led by a duo of Game Masters, George Primavera and Nick Williams, with the main cast including Jasmine Bular, Caroline Lux, and Jasmine Shion.

Speaker 31 Listen to new episodes every Monday anywhere you stream podcasts, or become a beacon member and listen to the podcast two weeks early and uninterrupted by ads.

Speaker 4 Hey there, campers! It's Game Master Sam Regal and welcome to our new miniseries Wild Mount Wildlings.

Speaker 4 In this three-part adventure, we're making our way to Axandria's premier sleep awake camp for aspiring adventurers and following the antics of four angsty teen campers and their camp counselors, Beauregard Lionette and Yasha Naidorin.

Speaker 4 New episodes of Wild Mountain Wildlings air on Thursdays at 6 p.m. Pacific on Beacon, Twitch, and YouTube with the VOD uploaded to YouTube on the following Mondays at noon.

Speaker 4 Prefer your adventures in audio form? Well, the podcast version arrives here on the Critical Role Podcast Network with a one-week delay from the original broadcast.

Speaker 4 You're listening to part one of this episode right now and part two will be available this upcoming Tuesday.

Speaker 4 If you want instant access to podcast content and an ad-free listening experience, check out Beacon and get access to the full audio version right when it airs at 6 p.m. Pacific on Thursdays.

Speaker 4 Plus, you can also check out our Beacon exclusive show, Critical Role Cooldown, and experience the cast's post-show reactions to each episode. Well, that should cover it.

Speaker 4 Now let's wild out and get this adventure started.

Speaker 4 Hey, welcome back. It's me, Sam Regal, and you're watching episode two of Wild Mount Wildlings.
It's so great to have you with us and we're joined by our friends at the table Ashley Johnson. Hello.

Speaker 4 Brennan Lee Mulligan, Levo Barrere, Eden Regal, Alex Lee, Marisha Ray and some guys.

Speaker 3 I snuck on.

Speaker 4 But before we go into tonight's episode, I think there are some announcements to make. Someone took my...

Speaker 38 There it is.

Speaker 38 Marisha. Yes.

Speaker 28 Oh, it's cheek to me.

Speaker 4 I think it's cheek to you.

Speaker 38 You have another announcement to make.

Speaker 39 I'm sorry.

Speaker 28 We just announced a new two-part underwater epic with 12-sided studios called Thresher.

Speaker 28 I'm very excited about this. This is a fresh new show that will feature Jasper William Cartwright as our game master, as well as players Abuba Carceline.

Speaker 27 No way.

Speaker 40 Yeah, I know.

Speaker 28 Mark Sherlock Humes, aka Mara, Jane Douglas, Nashir Dalal, and Jacqueline Emerson.

Speaker 28 You can tune in to the first of this two-part miniseries on Thursday, April 24th at 7 p.m. Pacific on Beacon, Twitch, and YouTube.

Speaker 27 And

Speaker 28 in addition to that,

Speaker 28 our Chicago live show is happening right now as we speak. Now now?

Speaker 27 Yeah, now now.

Speaker 40 As this is airing, we'll be in Chicago.

Speaker 28 So we're in two places at once.

Speaker 40 So you can stay tuned to our programming schedule on KurtRoll.com to learn when you'll be able to watch at home.

Speaker 4 Liam, you've got something to say.

Speaker 45 Liam!

Speaker 36 They let me sneak into camp just to tell you that Deer Cats Katzenprinz and other Zemnian tales is available right meow.

Speaker 46 This illustrated storybook is published with our friends at Insight Editions and was illustrated by Charlie Newt Borovsky and written by me. Let me take a second to gush about Newt.

Speaker 46 I know I wanted their art for this book years in advance.

Speaker 49 This is a gorgeous book.

Speaker 45 It contains Derkatzenprinz, Die Woltecher, and never before-seen story, Himmelschloss.

Speaker 3 Oh, Himmelschloss.

Speaker 37 You had me at Himmel.

Speaker 46 This is a work of passion for me. I'm very happy with it.
I can't wait for you all to open the pages of this book. You can find it today, wherever books are sold, or learn more at insighteditions.com.

Speaker 34 Cheek to you, Samuel.

Speaker 4 Okay, the cheeks are done. The announcements are finished.

Speaker 4 Ashley wants to see the book. I think we're ready to go.

Speaker 4 So let's dive into tonight's episode of A Critical Role.

Speaker 4 Okay, I need help next on this maze. Like I said, our heroes are going to be be lost in a very unusual maze.
Yes, Kestrel.

Speaker 4 Sorry, what?

Speaker 53 For different people, the maze appears differently.

Speaker 4 It appears differently for different people, okay?

Speaker 55 Maybe it could be like each person's

Speaker 56 favorite food.

Speaker 57 Each person's favorite food.

Speaker 4 That is very cool. I like that idea.
If it is food, do you guys have some favorite foods that you can suggest that we can use?

Speaker 3 I prefer pasta.

Speaker 4 You You prefer pasta?

Speaker 59 Okay.

Speaker 4 That's very good. Yes.

Speaker 25 Pho?

Speaker 4 Oh, specifically Q's. It's made out of my wife's pho.
Great. I love it.
Yes. Alan, do you have a favorite food or dessert or something?

Speaker 57 No.

Speaker 60 You don't? No, I don't.

Speaker 61 Whenever you're going in the wrong direction, a businessman pops up out of nowhere and lectures you about how you're doing the wrong thing in your business.

Speaker 4 I love the businessman.

Speaker 4 The businessman is going in the show. You're amazing.
Okay, eyes on me. Here we go.
Dream team.

Speaker 4 Next, our heroes might come across a swarm of smaller beasts. These don't all have to be the same beast.
They can be a bunch of different beasts.

Speaker 62 Yes.

Speaker 4 What do you have, cats?

Speaker 4 What is this? What am I looking at?

Speaker 52 This is...

Speaker 53 This is a

Speaker 53 possessed bunny.

Speaker 4 A possessed bunny doll?

Speaker 63 Yeah.

Speaker 4 Okay. And does this possessed bunny doll have a name?

Speaker 56 Yeah.

Speaker 3 What is it?

Speaker 63 Half and half.

Speaker 44 Half and half.

Speaker 4 Does half and half have any special powers?

Speaker 53 It can hypnotize.

Speaker 4 It can hypnotize you?

Speaker 57 Okay.

Speaker 4 With its eyes?

Speaker 32 Yeah, with its eyes. With its eyes?

Speaker 4 Okay, cool. Cool, cool, cool.
Ronin, did you have a monster that you want to present?

Speaker 54 If you come across this bat thing, it's sort of the monster, but the bat one looks more like a bat. It's called Sonic Scream.

Speaker 4 Sonic Scream.

Speaker 54 You'll always come across one of these because that's the guard of a Sonic Scream.

Speaker 61 And it's like screaming really loudly.

Speaker 54 Yeah, they just

Speaker 39 so loud.

Speaker 4 Okay, I like this. Marlow, did you have something?

Speaker 60 A Vikan, which is...

Speaker 57 I'm sorry?

Speaker 60 A Vikan, which is like a Lycanthrope and a vampire mixed together. So it's got like

Speaker 60 bat-like ears so it can hear from like very far distances and it's got bat wings and they're they can't it can't really fly with the wings but it's got wings.

Speaker 4 And how do you spell this?

Speaker 64 V-Y-C-A-N.

Speaker 4 V-Y-C-A-N. It's a half vampire, half werewolf.

Speaker 45 Yeah.

Speaker 4 Okay, I love it. Yes, Alan.

Speaker 60 Okay, so um we'll make it much less friendly, but what about like a group of sharks with legs?

Speaker 4 Sharks with legs, but unfriendly sharks with legs.

Speaker 60 Yeah, this one looks kind of nice.

Speaker 4 I don't mind a nice shark with legs.

Speaker 4 He could just be part of the gang and he doesn't have to attack or anything. Greta, did you have one?

Speaker 61 Oh, a bad therapist.

Speaker 3 And his eyes really creep you out.

Speaker 4 A therapist is like a feelings doctor who

Speaker 4 helps you with your feelings. But this is amazing.
So this is a bad therapist, and what do they do to you?

Speaker 61 His eyes really creep you out.

Speaker 3 That's horrifying. This is horrible.

Speaker 3 In fields and rivers, we go exploring.

Speaker 3 When it's boring, we wild out.

Speaker 3 We are the wildlings, yes, the wildlings.

Speaker 4 Critical Role is sponsored by BetterHelp. Look, there's a difference between venting to your GM and actually talking with a licensed therapist.

Speaker 4 That's where BetterHelp comes in with clinically trained and licensed therapists.

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Speaker 4 As the largest largest online therapy provider in the world, BetterHelp can provide access to mental health professionals with a diverse variety of expertise. Find the one with BetterHelp.

Speaker 4 Our listeners get 10% off their first month at betterhelp.com/slash critical role. That's betterhelp.com/slash critical role.

Speaker 1 Tron Aries has arrived. I would like you to meet Aries, the ultimate AI soldier.
He is biblically strong and supremely intelligent.

Speaker 4 You think you're in control of this?

Speaker 6 You're not.

Speaker 7 On October 10th. What are you?

Speaker 8 My world is coming to destroy yours.

Speaker 9 But I can help you.

Speaker 6 The war for our world begins in IMAX.

Speaker 10 Tron Aries, rated PG-13. Maybe inappropriate for children under 13.
Only in theaters on October 10th. Get tickets now.

Speaker 11 Going up.

Speaker 12 Prices keep going up these days.

Speaker 14 It feels like being on an elevator that only goes up. Going up.

Speaker 16 But not at Metro.

Speaker 17 We're pushing the down button.

Speaker 11 Going Going down.

Speaker 18 We've lowered prices. Get one line of 5G data for $40.

Speaker 20 Period. That's 20% lower.

Speaker 21 And you get a free Samsung 5G phone when you bring your number.

Speaker 7 Only at Metro.

Speaker 22 Five-year guarantee on eligible plans, exclusions, applies.

Speaker 15 See website for details. Not available at Metro with T-Mobile in the past six months.

Speaker 23 Tax supplies.

Speaker 24 For a limited time at McDonald's, get a Big Mac extra-value meal for $8.

Speaker 24 That means two all-beef patties, special sauce, lettuce, cheese, pickles, onions on a sesame seed bun, and medium fries, and a drink. We may need to change that jingle.

Speaker 26 Prices and participation may vary.

Speaker 4 Attention, campers! It's the last day of camp, and congratulations to campers who graduated to higher ranks. Unfortunately, the Olga cabin has not earned a single merit badge the whole summer.

Speaker 4 Counselors Bo and Yasha have been on hand to whip them into shape in just one day so they won't get kicked out.

Speaker 4 They took part in three activities, including Pine Cone Keepaway, the Pull of Peace, and Hide hide-and-seek. Yeza was working on potions and accidentally got counselor Yasha drunk with gray smoke.

Speaker 4 A massive pig arrived and kidnapped counselors Bo and Yasha and is currently on the loose inside the camp and the Olgas are the only campers around to do anything about it.

Speaker 4 Lunch today is postponed indefinitely.

Speaker 3 Oh no.

Speaker 65 Wild out.

Speaker 66 End of announcements.

Speaker 4 Yes, Bo and Yasha have been swiped by Gub Gub the flying pig.

Speaker 4 And it's currently up to you four, Skull Crusher, I'm sorry, Skye, Kai, Padman, and Jessup to find and rescue them, which means for Ashley and Marisha, you may leave the table.

Speaker 4 Your story is happening elsewhere.

Speaker 4 We will check in with you later.

Speaker 67 I can get your guys' autographs.

Speaker 29 We believe in you.

Speaker 27 I believe in you.

Speaker 44 We'll do our best.

Speaker 4 We'll do our best. Scooshi over.

Speaker 3 Scoochie over.

Speaker 4 Which leaves just the four of you.

Speaker 63 No, the peeps.

Speaker 4 You can leave the peeps.

Speaker 50 Leave the gun, take the peeps.

Speaker 63 I'm scared.

Speaker 25 Okay.

Speaker 4 Wow, you guys have so much more room.

Speaker 3 Wow.

Speaker 4 Smoke and screams. Chaos and pudding.

Speaker 4 Not pudding.

Speaker 4 Everything else though is true.

Speaker 4 Fully recovered from their smoke-induced depression, Skye and Jessup have been shouting at the top of their lungs to try to find their friends.

Speaker 4 Because Padman and Kai are off at a different part of the camp. They're in the admin building doing God knows what.
But all those shouts did not reach their ears. Instead, Yeza,

Speaker 4 Veth's husband, runs out of his lab to see what all the commotion is about.

Speaker 4 What is going on out here?

Speaker 69 Giant

Speaker 3 monster.

Speaker 43 Pig is

Speaker 71 swallowed.

Speaker 3 And we got so tired.

Speaker 55 We were so sad. We were crying.

Speaker 55 And the counselors, they're gone. They were gone.
They're in the pig.

Speaker 4 Oh, my God. He starts pacing back and forth, nervously twitching his hands and fingers.
Oh, my goodness. Insurance does not cover this.

Speaker 4 Where are your other friends? The other two, the other Olgas.

Speaker 72 They were hiding and seeking, and they were seeking elsewhere.

Speaker 55 They were seeking elsewhere.

Speaker 73 We don't know.

Speaker 55 We called for them, but I guess they didn't hear us.

Speaker 38 I'll go call for them.

Speaker 4 Just

Speaker 4 stand here and I'll go use the String Can network to try to reach them.

Speaker 4 Just hold on.

Speaker 38 Oh, boy. Oh, boy.

Speaker 4 He runs off to make a phone call. You guys are left there alone.
You can see on the ground the signs of the scuffle, those big...

Speaker 4 prints of cat and chicken paws that the that GubGub the flying chicken made

Speaker 4 and they they do go off in a direction you could try to try to find them but that right now there's currently no sign of them as you as you wait there Yeza goes and gets on the string can network which is a series of tin cans and strings that are strung all around the entire camp

Speaker 4 and he's gonna call out for the other two Padman and Kai and you two who are at the admin building you hear a muffled sound Padman Kai,

Speaker 4 supply shed immediately. Padman and Kai, can you hear me? There is a can hanging there on the admin building, but there's

Speaker 4 he can't see you or anything like that. So you are currently in the admin building looking at file folders.
What do you guys do?

Speaker 62 Hold on to some of those files.

Speaker 49 We might need them later.

Speaker 8 If we leave the admin building with him as stealing.

Speaker 62 No, we're just borrowing them, just for a little bit.

Speaker 45 Great point.

Speaker 3 Install them.

Speaker 68 And we'll walk out after Kai will leave the admin building.

Speaker 44 Okay, great.

Speaker 4 And you're heading back to

Speaker 4 towards the supply shed? Okay, great.

Speaker 4 Sure enough, a few moments later,

Speaker 4 the two of them, Padman and Kai, walk up. You are all four reunited over by the supply shed.

Speaker 4 And now all is calm.

Speaker 45 Are you guys alright? What happened?

Speaker 64 Did you see the pig chicken at all?

Speaker 3 What?

Speaker 3 There was a giant pig chicken.

Speaker 67 Delicious, but what can we do about that?

Speaker 3 What is it?

Speaker 70 And it swallowed Yasha and Bo.

Speaker 78 That was the most important part of the story.

Speaker 3 What? I know.

Speaker 62 Is pig chicken a code word for something?

Speaker 73 No, how big was this pig chicken?

Speaker 72 It was enormous. And it was 14 feet off the ground.

Speaker 58 Off the ground?

Speaker 3 Yeah, it's flying.

Speaker 39 It didn't fly.

Speaker 72 It's got wings.

Speaker 79 We did a really bad job telling the story, but those are all the facts.

Speaker 9 So a monster.

Speaker 63 Yeah.

Speaker 45 Just ate two members of the Bitey Diet.

Speaker 8 Yeah.

Speaker 31 Does this mean we get our badges early?

Speaker 50 Or is the whole day cancelled?

Speaker 62 What does this mean? I think we have to find them, right?

Speaker 81 I think we technically haven't even won the hide and seek because

Speaker 82 of the pig.

Speaker 56 Well, we're alone here at this.

Speaker 50 There's a monster.

Speaker 62 Have you considered that maybe they were hiding inside of the pig?

Speaker 79 No, the pig seemed to take them by force.

Speaker 59 It seemed pretty clear that it was a.

Speaker 8 There's only one thing for us to do.

Speaker 26 I'm gonna turn southeast and start running as fast as I can.

Speaker 4 Just a way- away.

Speaker 3 No!

Speaker 3 Get on your own!

Speaker 3 You were so good at all your spells earlier!

Speaker 76 That was a literal activity!

Speaker 76 That was literally a camp activity!

Speaker 4 How do you know this isn't a camp activity, too?

Speaker 67 Are you out of your mind?

Speaker 62 You did say at the beginning that there would be surprises and fun.

Speaker 67 What did I? Did I say that? I have no recollection. Somebody said that.
Does it sound like something I'd say? I woke up and said there's going to be surprises and fun. Why would I anticipate that?

Speaker 88 Guys, listen, everyone get their head on screws straight.

Speaker 49 What?

Speaker 3 I need to focus.

Speaker 67 My head's screwed on extremely straight. Somewhere southeast of here is the Bedagerie Coast, okay?

Speaker 36 My parents' villa, we're comfortable.

Speaker 67 It's there, locked, but I can figure out a way to get in.

Speaker 68 If I could

Speaker 86 throw my familiar through a plate class window and

Speaker 67 it's mended up behind me, you don't get that reference. You weren't there.

Speaker 30 Archibald, unfortunately, took a fall and went through the window.

Speaker 49 And

Speaker 63 Archibald. Oh, he's a mortal kid.

Speaker 30 It was a very bad fall.

Speaker 73 Padman, please come back.

Speaker 55 We need your help.

Speaker 33 You're talking...

Speaker 50 The Bite he died, went to another dimension and fought like a god. One of their friends is three different people, okay?

Speaker 67 They have like powers and abilities. The gods, they face down demons and dragons.
If a pig ate two of them, we can't beat that pig.

Speaker 30 How many legs do that pig have?

Speaker 72 We don't.

Speaker 89 So many.

Speaker 62 So many?

Speaker 78 I actually, I couldn't count.

Speaker 3 There were a lot of people. More than eight?

Speaker 90 Can I?

Speaker 69 Can I somehow

Speaker 71 convince Padman to stay with us and help us?

Speaker 4 That's up to you. If you're trying to think of details of the...
Are you trying to describe the pig?

Speaker 72 I realized I don't remember anything about how this pig.

Speaker 3 Okay,

Speaker 4 roll a history check to see if you can recall details about the pig.

Speaker 3 That is a nine

Speaker 63 histories, which

Speaker 86 yeah, history and I would go with Arcana maybe plus

Speaker 3 a 13.

Speaker 4 Yes, you get sketchy details in your memory, but yes, you recall that it had multiple legs, probably more than eight. You didn't count them, but some were cat paws and some were chicken feet.

Speaker 4 You remember that it was 14 feet tall, that it was flying, that it had rows of teeth. You also remember, and both of you sort of remember this, that there was a

Speaker 4 sort of a strange...

Speaker 4 warping effect around it, like like light was being bent as if by heat, but it wasn't like hot or anything, or at least you didn't feel heat radiating off of it.

Speaker 4 There was sort of like this energy that was

Speaker 4 yeah, just sort of warping and bending light a little bit and making it making everything sort of feel like this grayish

Speaker 4 sort of tone around it, uh, and that it hopped away. It couldn't take off because of the weight, so it uh it hopped away into deeper into the camp.

Speaker 83 Okay, guys,

Speaker 45 I got this.

Speaker 51 I walk over to Padman.

Speaker 4 Oh, he's he's walking.

Speaker 74 What, what is it?

Speaker 74 Listen, buddy. So, like,

Speaker 51 those are the mighty nine, yeah, right?

Speaker 75 Yeah

Speaker 8 some big heroes that you're a fan of right, yeah, and so

Speaker 45 if we

Speaker 8 take this pig down and we rescue them, what does that make you

Speaker 8 the luckiest frog on the planet? You are the mighty ten

Speaker 77 Wouldn't wouldn't that be right died comes from the zip I get it, I get it, yeah But the point is if we save them

Speaker 8 You will be a legend What do you think about that?

Speaker 67 Then we can make a card for you.

Speaker 49 And we can make it holographic.

Speaker 84 And with your signature on it.

Speaker 8 That card could easily go for 20 or 30 gold pieces. Absolutely, buddy.
So what say you?

Speaker 8 All right.

Speaker 8 This plan is just crazy enough to work.

Speaker 4 That's what I like to hear.

Speaker 79 We don't quite have a plan yet.

Speaker 3 This inclination is just easy enough to work.

Speaker 63 Okay,

Speaker 8 you saw a pig with cat and chicken feet

Speaker 8 eat two of the most powerful adventurers on the planet and rush off into the woods. But that's interesting.

Speaker 50 So it wasn't strong enough to fly.

Speaker 45 You'd think something 14 feet tall at the shoulder for a quadruped.

Speaker 8 And it doesn't have the strength to lift two humanoids.

Speaker 85 I would say on the scale of creatures in our world, I would say the average humanoid is about medium size.

Speaker 32 Yeah.

Speaker 32 Maybe the wings were just for show.

Speaker 67 I mean you and me are small, but you know, the medium size for them for sure.

Speaker 51 Is there...

Speaker 35 Can I make an arcana check as well?

Speaker 68 I want to see if I've heard anything about a pig like this.

Speaker 34 If it has any weaknesses to exploit.

Speaker 4 Sure, sure.

Speaker 44 Go ahead and say anything.

Speaker 62 What? Did it say anything?

Speaker 30 Make any noises?

Speaker 80 It went, it did.

Speaker 63 Gum, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go. Gum, go.

Speaker 56 Gub, guum, gum, wow.

Speaker 3 Gum, gum.

Speaker 8 It's possible that that's the creature's name, although it'd be crazy to have a creature that just said it's a name.

Speaker 32 Yeah, I don't know if that's believable.

Speaker 78 Crazier things have happened.

Speaker 87 That is not good.

Speaker 63 That is a

Speaker 4 10 archon. Yeah, I mean, it sounds crazy.

Speaker 4 Nothing in your

Speaker 4 study, certainly nothing that you've learned at the camp, reminds you of such a creature.

Speaker 82 Okay. Can I take a look around and see if there might be tracks leading in a certain direction?

Speaker 4 Go ahead and roll for either investigation or survival. You're looking for tracks.

Speaker 4 That's a 10.

Speaker 4 Um.

Speaker 4 A 9.

Speaker 37 Okay.

Speaker 4 I mean, yes, there are tracks. It's a huge creature, but you can't discern the direction that they lead in.
There's just a bunch of them.

Speaker 9 A bunch of them?

Speaker 83 That's right, because they have so many legs.

Speaker 4 And they were all sort of facing different directions on the creature.

Speaker 35 It seems like we have two simultaneous problems.

Speaker 8 One is locating the creature.

Speaker 83 The other one is how the heck we get our camp counselors out of its stomach if we actually find the dang thing.

Speaker 32 I'm going to look up to the top of the curfew creature tower.

Speaker 8 Yes.

Speaker 63 I'm going to go.

Speaker 68 You know, I've never actually seen Vishi because I have to go to bed super early.

Speaker 77 But theoretically,

Speaker 85 do we know when this creature's curfew is and if it would be in trouble for being out past its own curfew?

Speaker 49 Or would we get in trouble for being out past curfew?

Speaker 8 Yeah, I wonder if there's some way to convince the creature that we are absconding with this Gubgub

Speaker 8 and that it would come searching after Gubgub to find us.

Speaker 82 Michi.

Speaker 33 Yes, Michi, the Michi.

Speaker 75 Michi, yeah.

Speaker 42 That's true. So, should we go talk to Michi?

Speaker 35 Yeah, we have to be slick, though.

Speaker 85 We have to use the

Speaker 33 you have to speak to it in a way where after you're done talking, it does what you want it to.

Speaker 39 I know what this call is.

Speaker 63 I pull out my disguise kit and I put my creative sources on.

Speaker 3 Amazing. Oh my god, is there that guy?

Speaker 62 I walk up to, I want to go to the creature tower.

Speaker 4 Okay, so you guys are all going to together go over to Mishi?

Speaker 4 Okay, so Mishi's tower is just a few hundred feet away.

Speaker 4 It is a wooden lookout tower on big stilts, and up above it is that familiar blue and purple furry creature looking down at you. It's Mishi the curfew creature.

Speaker 4 Would you like to try to get its attention or...

Speaker 32 So first, I want to discuss amongst you guys, what exactly is the plan here?

Speaker 62 Are we trying to get info to see if Mishi maybe saw the creature and where it was going? Or are we just trying to make it so that we can continue our adventures past curfew?

Speaker 33 So, I'm definitely hustling on the camp counselor's got eaten problem.

Speaker 3 Okay,

Speaker 67 like, I agree, it would be sick to stay uploaded.

Speaker 3 Don't get me wrong, that would be rad as hell.

Speaker 67 But I think for me, that just thinking, look, if we found the tracks and we chase this creature down, it's gonna eat us. Like, it's gonna eat us.
It's gonna eat us. So, we have to be smart.

Speaker 67 We have to do something. We either have to get some of the only two things that occur to me are Yez's potions and getting some kind of like Ipacac or something that can make this thing barf.

Speaker 32 But what?

Speaker 42 That's a great idea. Yeah.

Speaker 50 Get something that can make it throw up those adventurers.

Speaker 67 Get an antidote. Why did they take that potion that made them so less powerful?

Speaker 67 Just like relax. We're kids.

Speaker 30 Just don't hit us literally as hard as you can.

Speaker 79 I do have concerns about if we do try to make the creature, if we try to make the gub gub throw up, how toxic that might be, what we might be exposed to,

Speaker 79 that might not.

Speaker 36 Sure.

Speaker 50 That's a good point.

Speaker 80 Do any of us have any kind of healing potion or spell?

Speaker 80 Okay, that could come in handy.

Speaker 62 I want to turn to Mishi and initiate a conversation.

Speaker 4 She's up the tower, so you just gotta flag her down or make some noise or something. Hey!

Speaker 4 And

Speaker 4 sure enough, she sticks her head over the top of the tower, over the edge, and she says to you,

Speaker 4 Hello, Dainty Feet. How can I help you? It's three hours and 30 minutes before curfew, by the way.

Speaker 50 I put on a voice and go, Dainty Feet, who's that?

Speaker 58 Oh.

Speaker 94 I'm I'm sorry, I'm Georb with the Counselors League of Counselors.

Speaker 4 Oh, you're a counselor?

Speaker 3 I am, yes.

Speaker 4 Oh, where's your counselor uniform?

Speaker 3 Uh, left it in the wash today.

Speaker 50 Go ahead.

Speaker 94 You can expect to be called here for an emergency, which this is what that is.

Speaker 4 Go ahead and roll a persuade deception check. Deception check.

Speaker 49 That is uh.

Speaker 49 Oh, okay. Not terrible, not terrible.

Speaker 32 That is a 14.

Speaker 4 Okay, pretty good, pretty good. She cocks her head at you and looks you up and down,

Speaker 4 and with a smile says to you, Well, I know that that's not true, but I can't fault you for trying.

Speaker 4 Other campers have tried many, many more deceptions on me, but you see, my job is to watch you, and I've seen you this entire time.

Speaker 62 I pull off my bottom mustache.

Speaker 32 Oh my god, it's only my top mustache.

Speaker 3 Oh, wait,

Speaker 66 my top is tomorrow.

Speaker 87 I don't mean it.

Speaker 94 You know, it was just a test.

Speaker 87 It's very, you know,

Speaker 4 it's customary.

Speaker 37 No, no. I'm actually Jor Bond from the Counselors League.

Speaker 3 Can I roll one more?

Speaker 25 Go ahead.

Speaker 25 Go ahead.

Speaker 39 Oh, no. It's even worse.

Speaker 25 Oh, I.

Speaker 4 Is your friend all right? He seems to be confused as to the market.

Speaker 3 I take off my top mustache.

Speaker 3 I'm out of ideas.

Speaker 4 I applaud your efforts, but um I've I've it's not my first day on the job.

Speaker 82 If I'm not mistaken, uh my friend Patman,

Speaker 81 you want to try to convince the the pig creature that it's out past its curfew?

Speaker 4 Well, are you guys talking about the pig creature?

Speaker 50 You know of Gubgub the pig creature.

Speaker 4 Oh, I mean I saw it. I see everything.

Speaker 3 Okay, so we knew that.

Speaker 36 Do you where did it go?

Speaker 90 Do you happen to know where it went?

Speaker 4 There's two things I believe in more than anything. One is that curfew must be observed.

Speaker 4 And the other is everyone's right to privacy.

Speaker 4 I'm sorry, I can't reveal the whereabouts of Pig Creature.

Speaker 67 Is it the...

Speaker 8 So I have a question about sort of your role at camp.

Speaker 3 You are...

Speaker 67 Ostensibly, curfew is a rule that exists to promote the safety and well-being of the camp.

Speaker 67 So would you not say that the higher priority order is the safety and well-being of camp?

Speaker 4 I'm sure it is the higher priority for those that own and run the camp. I'm neither.
I only care about curfew.

Speaker 75 Okay. All right.

Speaker 45 Well, I got one more idea.

Speaker 49 I got one more idea.

Speaker 67 Now that I'm picking my head up from making my card game, I have to say I have a lot of notes for how this camp works.

Speaker 50 I have a lot of thoughts that I will be submitting and writing at the end of the day.

Speaker 4 It was quite amusing to watch the creature bounce and hop across the camp.

Speaker 62 Padman, I want you to look through your files that we took from admin and see if there's any dirt on this michi there.

Speaker 67 Okay, I'll take a look. We stole files from admin, but I guess you don't give a shit about that either.

Speaker 38 No, it sounds great.

Speaker 4 Which file? You definitely took files about yourself and about Kai, correct?

Speaker 30 And I think Jessup and

Speaker 83 Skye as well.

Speaker 4 Do you think that you grabbed something about Mishi as well?

Speaker 45 Sure.

Speaker 45 I'll roll forward to the next one.

Speaker 44 All right, great.

Speaker 4 Yes, let's see if you did.

Speaker 4 Go ahead and roll a, I don't know,

Speaker 4 a history? No.

Speaker 45 Boy.

Speaker 74 My investigation, history, and Arcana are all the same.

Speaker 4 Great. Investigation then.

Speaker 8 It's only a 10.

Speaker 4 You definitely grabbed files about yourself and about Kai and maybe the ladies, but there's nothing.

Speaker 4 However, I will say, everybody rolled just an insight check or a history check about you've had interactions with Mishi before. This is not your first date in Michigan.
16.

Speaker 62 Okay. Is it insight or history?

Speaker 37 Can we pick? You can do.

Speaker 45 You can pick.

Speaker 83 Okay, then seven.

Speaker 59 16.

Speaker 79 12.

Speaker 3 Okay.

Speaker 4 You guys have have 16s over here. Yeah, you both know that

Speaker 4 Mishi is very good at her job. She makes sure that everyone gets home by curfew.

Speaker 4 You also know that

Speaker 8 she has some vices.

Speaker 4 She's greedy because she's not paid by the camp, so she gets money wherever she can.

Speaker 4 And she's also, she's a little bit vain.

Speaker 4 She stays up there most of the day with a mirror, just sort of looking at herself and combing things out of her hair.

Speaker 4 But that's sort of all you know about her

Speaker 4 or just her sort of personality quirks. But she definitely knows where these folks went.

Speaker 4 Just doesn't want to give up the info.

Speaker 84 I put my hand on Mishi's shoulder and I said...

Speaker 4 Mishi's up in the tower.

Speaker 25 You want to try to climb up there to do it?

Speaker 62 Yeah, I'm going to climb up there to do it.

Speaker 4 Okay, great. Sure enough, easy enough.
You climb up there. Hello.

Speaker 49 Can I put my hand on your shoulder?

Speaker 4 I don't see why not.

Speaker 83 Okay, I'm gonna put my hand on your shoulder, alright? That's nice. No, Mishi,

Speaker 49 here's the deal.

Speaker 62 Two of the Mighty Nine just got taken captive.

Speaker 32 I know, I saw. Flying

Speaker 75 creature.

Speaker 62 You see that little frog guy down there?

Speaker 49 See him?

Speaker 4 Yes, I do.

Speaker 83 He has a bright future ahead of him.

Speaker 84 He has this incredible card game.

Speaker 62 He's developing right now. It's awesome.
I've seen all the art. The art is amazing, by the way.

Speaker 4 Is it like is it a betting game?

Speaker 47 No, no, no, no.

Speaker 30 It's it's like um it's like a it's tactical

Speaker 4 tactical card game. Are some of the cards like energy cards that fuel spells and abilities or is it uh like uh yes, yes, we have all that

Speaker 62 precisely not to get into the details, but here's the deal, right?

Speaker 75 Now

Speaker 62 once he saves and rescues those two camp counselors, I'm pretty sure they're gonna reward us with an autograph on these limited edition cards. Wow.

Speaker 62 And once that happens, you'll be the first one, if you decide to help us, that gets a hold of one of these cards.

Speaker 62 So here's my deal to you, right?

Speaker 4 How much do you think they're worth?

Speaker 50 Oh, easily with the signatures on them, and once we get it holographic,

Speaker 87 easily, I don't know, anywhere from two to five thousand gold coins.

Speaker 75 Whoa!

Speaker 50 Insanely rare collector's item, right?

Speaker 62 I'll sweeten the pot for you. Hmm.
I can make some calls and get you your own card.

Speaker 63 Wow.

Speaker 84 Yes.

Speaker 4 So you're offering me a rare card that doesn't exist yet.

Speaker 77 Not yet, but it will.

Speaker 4 For a game that doesn't exist.

Speaker 62 Not yet, but it will.

Speaker 4 And you're assigning it a value that you're just basing on arbitrary guesses?

Speaker 47 No.

Speaker 62 We have a focus group and a test group, and we've run the numbers. Huh?

Speaker 26 Seems to be up there.

Speaker 4 Why don't you roll a deception check?

Speaker 3 19.

Speaker 83 oh okay oh a focus group all right well that's oh wait wait hold on plus six

Speaker 32 that is changes 25 25.

Speaker 4 well i would need to see one of these cards

Speaker 67 uh what sort of mana are you most interested in uh mana is that the energy that fuels the moves in this we're workshopping other things we had to deal with energy spell spell fuel is another term that feels a little clitical to me but just give her one of them

Speaker 4 can i use a minor minor illusion to make one one of these cards appear you sure can what do you want it to look like I want it to look like exactly the most valuable card that he was just describing okay okay with hologram with a hologram feature on it with hologram feature um uh I think uh minor illusion has a 30-foot range so you could make it appear up near her

Speaker 4 if you if you care to all right um what is your spell DC let's see if she can see through the illusion. Hold on, I can look for you because I know you're new to this.

Speaker 4 Your spell, DC, is 13, so she has to roll to see if she believes that this card exists. So this card pops up in front of her.
Are you presenting it to her?

Speaker 62 Yeah, I flick it out like this.

Speaker 9 Oh, oh, there it is.

Speaker 4 She inspects it.

Speaker 37 Okay.

Speaker 48 Wow.

Speaker 4 Can I see the back of it, please?

Speaker 51 Yeah.

Speaker 4 And so you're acting like you're holding the card?

Speaker 37 Uh-huh.

Speaker 4 Okay. So you're moving your minor illusion with his hand to make it seem like it's a physical thing.

Speaker 79 I'm doing my little monocle.

Speaker 4 Okay, alright, just roll a performance check to see if the illusion is convincing enough.

Speaker 56 11 plus what?

Speaker 50 Performance down.

Speaker 78 Performance plus 3.

Speaker 4 Oh, that's very good. Alright, the illusion is maintaining.
It looks like you're actually holding this thing.

Speaker 4 Well, I mean, if they're already in production...

Speaker 4 I suppose I...

Speaker 4 I suppose I could. Alright, I'll take the card.
Give it to me.

Speaker 30 Sorry, but this is a prototype.

Speaker 62 It's very valuable right now, and we need to hang on to it for

Speaker 32 mass reproduction.

Speaker 62 So you will get your fair share once everything is done. Plus, listen to this.
Listen to this. Remember the offer where I said that we can get you your own card?

Speaker 84 Think of this.

Speaker 62 That means that you have the rights to sign autographs.

Speaker 86 Therefore, you're making passive income. Well, it's not really passive, but you you know, you're making steady income from the card.

Speaker 4 So if I sign an autograph on the card,

Speaker 4 someone's going to sell these or distribute them for me?

Speaker 44 How does this work?

Speaker 50 Who knows what they'll do with it, but the

Speaker 47 power they will pay you

Speaker 62 and they can either keep it for themselves or sell it online.

Speaker 35 Or I mean via the trade network.

Speaker 67 You mean

Speaker 32 various merchant guilds who are connected via a web of merchant guilds.

Speaker 64 Listen, also, time is of the essence because if you're not going to be able to do that,

Speaker 38 what are you saying?

Speaker 95 Time is of the essence because if they die, that card becomes less valuable.

Speaker 3 That's right.

Speaker 95 So, if you give us that information, we can find them.

Speaker 88 And that card, they will

Speaker 3 sign it.

Speaker 90 They need to be able to sign it.

Speaker 88 Won't be able to sign it for you.

Speaker 4 This sounds so convincing, and yet...

Speaker 4 A bit far-fetched.

Speaker 37 Every great idea of this generation is far-fetched.

Speaker 67 I think that Mishi clearly doesn't want to work with this, which is a shame because I had actually just finished the prototype of Mishi's card.

Speaker 4 I'm sorry, what was that?

Speaker 87 Well,

Speaker 87 we needed the most powerful card in the game, so we...

Speaker 3 I remember there were four APIs. Oh, he's very handsome.

Speaker 86 You have the prototype, right?

Speaker 88 I do. I have the prototype.

Speaker 4 I want to give a help action on a performance check. Okay, go ahead.
Are you going to do another minor illusion?

Speaker 4 Okay, so that card has disappeared. A new card.
Please describe this card that is now appearing before Mishi.

Speaker 72 It is Mishi 6.0. Mishi is the most handsome or the most beautiful version of herself.
Her hair is flowing. She's holographic.
She looks like...

Speaker 64 It's gold foil.

Speaker 72 And it's gold foil.

Speaker 72 She looks like the ideal version of herself.

Speaker 79 Like she's never looked more beautiful in her life before.

Speaker 4 All right, roller performance check with advantage since you've got help with Padman over here.

Speaker 3 10.

Speaker 87 17.

Speaker 76 Plus 3 is dirty 20.

Speaker 4 You see

Speaker 4 the ruffles of her fur sort of go up for a second as if she suddenly got goosebumps. Oh my goodness gracious.
It's my very own card.

Speaker 30 Well, since you don't want to do it, I guess we'll just have to rip this up.

Speaker 4 I can reconsider.

Speaker 4 I just wanted to see how good quality these cards were. And if you say that there's an elegant rule set that goes with them.

Speaker 67 It's deeply intuitive.

Speaker 4 Yes, complicated enough for the people who love crunching numbers.

Speaker 74 Submit an alert a lifetime to bastard.

Speaker 4 But also easy enough to pick up on your first try.

Speaker 50 Yeah, it's actually a game that's great for everybody, and everybody should buy it.

Speaker 77 It leaves no one out.

Speaker 67 100% barking appeal.

Speaker 79 And people who don't even like these cards are going to want to buy the most beautiful cards for aesthetic purposes because they're like works of art.

Speaker 67 I heard some people just buy them for their coffee table to be a conversationalist.

Speaker 4 And what is one last question, I swear. What is the game called?

Speaker 49 We're workshop in the name right now.

Speaker 67 So it's either going to be called

Speaker 67 Mysteria Battle Cards of Wildbout.

Speaker 3 Pretty good.

Speaker 37 Or Boker.

Speaker 37 Hmm.

Speaker 4 I've never heard of either.

Speaker 4 Listen, I believe in the right to privacy. I can't tell you where they went, but

Speaker 4 they didn't go that way to the gross.

Speaker 4 They didn't go that way to the trail.

Speaker 4 They didn't go that way to the counselor's cabins. So I guess that leaves, and she coyily nods in the direction of the campers' cabins.

Speaker 4 But remember, you didn't hear it from me.

Speaker 50 We will protect your identity from anyone who would be mad that you have this this fucking boss.

Speaker 67 Thank you so much, Mishi.

Speaker 4 Oh, you're welcome. Remember, curfews in three hours and 15 minutes.

Speaker 3 You gotta.

Speaker 80 Yes, thank you.

Speaker 67 Does that curfew apply to just campers or does it apply to everybody?

Speaker 8 Like monsters, for example?

Speaker 4 Oh, everyone at the camp needs to obey the same curfew.

Speaker 32 Fascinating.

Speaker 49 Fascinating. Keep that in the back of your mind.

Speaker 63 Right.

Speaker 86 Alright, let's go to these campers' cabins.

Speaker 4 And you do. You follow the path towards the campers' cabins.
You know them very well. And as you walk that direction, searching for Bo and Yasha, now would be a good time to check in on Bo and Yasha.

Speaker 4 So we're going to cut away to them right now.

Speaker 12 Prices keep going up these days.

Speaker 14 It feels like being on an elevator that only goes up.

Speaker 11 Going up.

Speaker 16 But not at Metro.

Speaker 17 We're pushing the down button.

Speaker 11 Going down.

Speaker 18 We've lowered prices. Get one line of 5G data for $40.

Speaker 19 Period.

Speaker 20 That's 20% lower.

Speaker 21 And you get a free Samsung 5G phone when you bring your number.

Speaker 7 Only at Metro.

Speaker 22 Five-year guarantee on eligible plans, exclusion supplies.

Speaker 15 See website for details. Not available if that Metro with T-Mobile in the past six months.

Speaker 23 Tax supplies.

Speaker 43 Oh no. What is happening?

Speaker 89 Why are we tired?

Speaker 3 Thank you, Sam.

Speaker 40 Actually, kind of got me.

Speaker 38 Bo,

Speaker 3 Yasha.

Speaker 4 Being carried away in the mouth of a giant pork creature did not harm you, at least not physically. It did harm your pride, being two women

Speaker 4 members of the Mighty Nine and being defeated so easily by a giant piggy bank

Speaker 4 was a bit shameful, but you don't have to keep rubbing.

Speaker 89 Yeah, you don't have to.

Speaker 25 We got it.

Speaker 4 Your physical bodies were not harmed. However, hi.

Speaker 3 Yeah.

Speaker 63 Hi. Hi.

Speaker 3 However,

Speaker 4 something happened to you. You both were hypnotized in a way.

Speaker 4 You both blacked out. I don't know if it was the rocking motion of this animal sort of carrying you around in the darkness or if there was some sort of tranquilizing agent in its poisonous saliva, but

Speaker 27 you both passed.

Speaker 29 It was very warm in there.

Speaker 89 Yeah, it was very warm.

Speaker 36 It was like a womb again. It really was.
Being in the womb was kind of cozy.

Speaker 4 But now you've woken up

Speaker 4 like we are in a very dimly lit room.

Speaker 4 You can't really make out the features of the room. Your eyes are still adjusting and you're waking up.
You're groggy. Your vision is a little bit blurry.

Speaker 25 I can't see.

Speaker 4 Yep, that's what I just said.

Speaker 3 Okay.

Speaker 96 Because I'm not feeling it out.

Speaker 4 But you've woken up tied to two chairs and

Speaker 4 tied to each other with some sort of chain. No, not a chain, a rope, but it's an unusual rope.
It's not of a material that you're familiar with. You're still sort of getting your bearings.

Speaker 36 What is this material?

Speaker 89 What is this? It's

Speaker 89 so strange.

Speaker 4 Why don't you roll a perception check to find out?

Speaker 3 Okay.

Speaker 3 You gotta drop it down a little. Thank you.

Speaker 89 When you move, I'm gonna be. It's bad.

Speaker 27 I thought my perception is a plus six or something.

Speaker 25 I can't really do this that well.

Speaker 3 Let me move this out of the way.

Speaker 3 Anthony. Okay, yeah,

Speaker 4 it's a strange material that you can't quite understand, but you know, you do get the sense that it is animal in nature. In fact, this might be a finely woven rope of cat fur, which is very unusual.

Speaker 52 Hutch? Oh, no.

Speaker 86 No. I'm allergic.
Clean up.

Speaker 3 I'm sorry.

Speaker 29 Oh, this is a worse day.

Speaker 4 What would you like to do?

Speaker 27 Okay. Okay.

Speaker 27 I have a lot of questions. I feel like there's a lot to unpack here.

Speaker 89 Yes, which is why I don't understand how this ended up happening.

Speaker 27 How did this happen? Do

Speaker 29 pigs have oppulsible thumbs?

Speaker 52 Totally and chicken feet? And chicken feet?

Speaker 89 How did we sleep in there and then we woke up and we were tied to this chair? Like, did a pig do it?

Speaker 3 But also, you were drunk!

Speaker 89 I was not...

Speaker 89 That wasn't what happened. Doom said.
And there was like a poof of smoke, and

Speaker 89 I got a little

Speaker 97 felt a little drunk. Okay.

Speaker 89 But I don't know why.

Speaker 27 We don't need to argue about this right now.

Speaker 89 No, no, no, no. We need to work together as a a team, babe.

Speaker 3 Look,

Speaker 27 how are you feeling? You still feel like that fucking potion is still like.

Speaker 89 Why did we do that? Why did we do that?

Speaker 29 I've only punched like

Speaker 29 two, maybe three kids in the past.

Speaker 89 Yeah, maybe three. And that's not a lot of them.

Speaker 89 You could have punched so many more kids if you didn't. And they don't trust me.
You chose it.

Speaker 96 They don't trust me to not punch kids.

Speaker 89 This is unreal.

Speaker 40 Well,

Speaker 89 I'm going to try. I'm going to try to like

Speaker 97 get my muscles really, really str.

Speaker 89 I'm gonna try to

Speaker 4 flex your rippling, awesome muscles. Yes.

Speaker 4 The ropes stretch and poof!

Speaker 4 An explosion of some sort of mist comes out

Speaker 4 of the ropes themselves. Oh, no, what? They flash with a shimmer of light, and a mist shoots out of them.
Please roll a charisma-saving thread.

Speaker 3 What?

Speaker 4 With disadvantage, you, because you're still drunk. Oh, no!

Speaker 38 I don't know if it's gonna be

Speaker 3 worse than that? Just

Speaker 3 than you?

Speaker 40 Come on, Bodai. What is it? Come on.

Speaker 3 Bed!

Speaker 3 Bed!

Speaker 97 Why is it emitting a...

Speaker 89 It's poofing. Why is it putting it? It's getting out of the way.

Speaker 4 And the mist flies into your nostrils. It is some sort of enchanted cat dander.

Speaker 4 And you are both instantly poisoned by it.

Speaker 38 You know how cats mark their territory?

Speaker 97 Yes.

Speaker 89 And isn't it like cats like their pee or their poo.

Speaker 29 Yeah, they get like a little it like squirts.

Speaker 89 It squirts and is that what this is? It gets in your nose and then like you become like crazy. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Speaker 76 It's not peer-poo.

Speaker 7 It's cat dander.

Speaker 29 I think this is.

Speaker 89 Yeah, not even the dander. The dander is what makes it.

Speaker 3 Tacto, tacto plus.

Speaker 3 Tacto yes, this is

Speaker 4 100% not peer-poo. It is cat dander, but it is mystical and you both suffer now the poisoned effect.
So all roles will be made at disadvantage.

Speaker 4 And because your eyes are puffy, you're itchy, you're not feeling comfortable, you feel like you're being hugged by an uncomfortable hug, and

Speaker 4 your strength rolls will be at negative five. What?

Speaker 86 Why?

Speaker 52 I wasn't sure

Speaker 29 again what?

Speaker 4 You guys are mighty legendary heroes. You've suffered traps like this before.

Speaker 89 And we're becoming undone by cat dander.

Speaker 29 Never wanted to be a cat lady.

Speaker 4 Yet, you know that magic like this doesn't last forever. You can probably wait out the effects, but it might take a while.
And until then, I'll leave you to it.

Speaker 89 Well, what are we supposed to do now?

Speaker 3 I don't know.

Speaker 29 This is every minute that goes by.

Speaker 40 We're leaving the kids unattended.

Speaker 89 What if there's other creatures out there that

Speaker 97 they get eaten or

Speaker 89 killed and it's on our watch?

Speaker 27 That is... There is a non-zero chance.

Speaker 27 That is very actually likely to happen.

Speaker 3 We're going to get in so much trouble.

Speaker 89 And they're good kids.

Speaker 40 Yeah, I really actually kind of like them.

Speaker 3 I do too for like

Speaker 29 four hours, but I actually really like them.

Speaker 89 Me too. I was a little nervous at first, but but you know, like they're all so interesting and different.

Speaker 28 I was afraid they were gonna smell weird.

Speaker 89 Yeah, I was a little afraid. They kind of do.

Speaker 27 You know how kids have like they do. But it's not bad.
It's not bad. Kids have like a smell, you know?

Speaker 89 They have a dander too. They do have a dander.
There's kid dander, and now there's... we're dealing with cat dander.

Speaker 27 The kids feel like red socks all the time, yeah.

Speaker 52 You know, it's like they're they're they're

Speaker 89 we've got sky

Speaker 73 who's like

Speaker 89 she's so she's buff as fuck.

Speaker 4 I know, I really wish she would like lean into

Speaker 89 lean into it, but also like wants to practice magic, which I, you know, I can't fault her for

Speaker 40 you know broadening her horizons.

Speaker 96 I love it.

Speaker 89 Like, if I could do magic, I would be so happy.

Speaker 44 Yeah, you can do a little magic.

Speaker 29 Yeah, I can do a little

Speaker 29 bit of wings.

Speaker 8 Yeah,

Speaker 89 yeah, I mean, I sometimes...

Speaker 25 I sometimes like secretly wish that I could

Speaker 57 cast something.

Speaker 3 Yeah.

Speaker 89 Like a... Like.
Something...

Speaker 3 Like a fireball coming out of my hand.

Speaker 78 I mean, I guess. I guess we can talk to Caleb.

Speaker 4 I guess we could talk to Caleb.

Speaker 52 He's not busy.

Speaker 89 Oh, Caleb, it was part of the reason.

Speaker 29 Fucking Caleb.

Speaker 16 Oh.

Speaker 40 I swear to God. Yeah, okay, wait.

Speaker 67 I got an idea.

Speaker 86 What if...

Speaker 96 What if we...

Speaker 42 This hurts my pride.

Speaker 3 What if we yell for help?

Speaker 89 I mean, I don't hate it. Okay.
It's an option. I mean, maybe the kids are close by or something.

Speaker 27 They're close by. They gotta rescue us.
Like, this is a test, right? They gotta do it.

Speaker 89 They gotta do it. Yeah, maybe this is a test.
Maybe this is set up.

Speaker 29 Okay.

Speaker 3 Help! Help! Hey!

Speaker 29 Beth!

Speaker 29 Get kids!

Speaker 16 Guy!

Speaker 89 Children! Penbury!

Speaker 38 As you guys yell,

Speaker 4 as you guys yell and struggle futilely,

Speaker 4 we will fly back to the world of Sky, Kai, Jessup, and Padman and check in on how they're doing.

Speaker 86 Get me out of here!

Speaker 29 Yay! Kids!

Speaker 4 And we're back with the Olgas.

Speaker 4 You four round a bend and are on your way to the campers' cabins and are met with a jaw-dropping sight. It's the campers' cabins, you know them well.

Speaker 4 There's Rooster's Roost where the bards bunk, Lion Lodge for warriors, fighters, and paladins, the pig pen for rangers and their beast companions, compass keep, unicorn haven, the fox hole, the nest up the boughs of a tree, but all of these cabins are covered in the most amazing food you've ever seen.

Speaker 4 Stairs and bridges of stacked stakes lead to pasta pathways and blueberry pie cobblestones underfoot. There's a fountain of pho in the courtyard in the middle.

Speaker 4 The best way to describe this is a maze of yums.

Speaker 4 In fact, I would love to paint a picture for you, but strangely, you all see a slightly different set of meals.

Speaker 4 Kai, what is your favorite food?

Speaker 84 A big steak, a big old steak.

Speaker 4 Yes, and so most of the cabins you see are just covered in red meat. Big old slabs of kobe beef and beautiful tea bones and all kinds of

Speaker 4 hamburger meat sort of dripping down the sides of the walls.

Speaker 58 Sky.

Speaker 55 Shepherd's pie.

Speaker 4 Shepherd's pie. It's the most beautiful shepherd's pie you've ever seen.
There's an archway made out of it with a big hole in the middle with the dripping peas and carrots sort of coming through it.

Speaker 90 Sounds disgusting.

Speaker 59 And also, I'm hungry.

Speaker 4 Jessup, what do you see?

Speaker 79 I love kimchi for the probiotics.

Speaker 4 Or the pungent aroma of kimchi is in the air,

Speaker 4 tangy and zesty, and yes, indeed, there's windows made of very thinly sliced kimchi that you can sort of see through in sort of a disgusting, beautiful way. Padman, do you have a favorite food?

Speaker 50 Shoe fly pie.

Speaker 4 Shoe fly pie? I'm unaware what that is. What is that?

Speaker 50 Shoe fly pie in the real world is made of molasses.

Speaker 67 But

Speaker 67 Xandria, it's made with real flies.

Speaker 4 And the flies are buzzing.

Speaker 4 There seems to be, well, actually everybody roll a sort of a perception chapter to just see what you see.

Speaker 37 23. Oh my god.

Speaker 80 It's a one, so I'm gonna roll again.

Speaker 29 God, I hate that because

Speaker 71 I have no morals.

Speaker 91 What you just said perception? Yes.

Speaker 41 10. Okay.

Speaker 4 Between the group, you all sort of get a sense for what this place is. Everything about the place seems off.

Speaker 4 The smells don't match up to the sights you're seeing. Beef smells like matcha tea.
Candy smells like dog food.

Speaker 4 But you do see a sort of a big main gateway, which is an archway made out of pepperoni pizza.

Speaker 4 But

Speaker 4 you,

Speaker 4 whoever rolled above a 15, also noticed that the entire maze shimmers with a faint warping. Again, that sort of strange light bending effect as if as if being viewed through heat but there is a

Speaker 4 an archway that sort of leads into it and that's all you see

Speaker 65 I'm gonna look around.

Speaker 74 Have I ever seen this much food at camp before?

Speaker 4 No, no, never. I mean there is definitely healthy portions of breakfast and lunch and dinner at the gross.

Speaker 4 Phyllis, the chef, makes a fine, fine, sloppy joe, but never this much.

Speaker 83 I'm going to look and see like beautiful molasses filled with deep-fried flies

Speaker 4 oozing out of a giant slice of pie and go,

Speaker 8 that's why Bob's special recipe.

Speaker 8 She would never make time to copier.

Speaker 26 This is fake.

Speaker 8 This is not real.

Speaker 8 This is illusory.

Speaker 33 We are the victims of an illusion.

Speaker 33 Oh, I get it now.

Speaker 4 For sure it's an illusion.

Speaker 4 The four of you are smart enough to know that this isn't real,

Speaker 4 but it sure looks real and something or someone or some effect made this.

Speaker 4 And it seems to be surrounding the entire campers' cabins.

Speaker 42 I think we have to check it out.

Speaker 80 Can I go up

Speaker 82 and touch it at least?

Speaker 4 Sure, you go up and touch it.

Speaker 4 The food that you liked again was

Speaker 38 Shepherd's pie.

Speaker 4 Yes, it feels and looks like Shepherd's pie.

Speaker 32 Be careful, don't eat it.

Speaker 32 It might be dangerous.

Speaker 62 I was just gonna say, try to bite.

Speaker 91 If anyone will, it should be me.

Speaker 81 Because I have a terrific constitution.

Speaker 77 I think if anyone will...

Speaker 83 Well, that's interesting, because eating it probably won't have a biological effect if it's illusory, but it might have a mental one.

Speaker 79 I have a terrible constitution.

Speaker 32 It definitely shouldn't be me.

Speaker 9 Well, I'm literally immune to poison.

Speaker 45 And

Speaker 37 you are very hungry.

Speaker 4 You're going to taste. Yeah, I'll taste it.

Speaker 68 Okay.

Speaker 4 Let us see what happens.

Speaker 4 You taste

Speaker 4 something very wonderful.

Speaker 4 Roll a D4 if you can.

Speaker 86 Three.

Speaker 4 You

Speaker 4 instantly get a bite of your mom's shufi pie in your mouth. It's delicious.
You gain three temporary hit points.

Speaker 9 The illusion is perfect.

Speaker 4 Now roll a wisdom saving throw.

Speaker 8 Three temporary hit points.

Speaker 75 Not great.

Speaker 74 That is going to be on a wisdom save.

Speaker 50 That's going to be an eight.

Speaker 92 Okay.

Speaker 4 You had to beat a 10, you didn't. But because you gained three temporary hit points, you actually had to beat a 13.

Speaker 4 So

Speaker 4 you did fail.

Speaker 4 All of a sudden, you're overcome with that feeling of homesickness, of tasting your mother's cooking.

Speaker 4 You got to go in there, and you've got to just taste more.

Speaker 4 Home is in there. You got to go in.

Speaker 45 I'll take a bite and I'll be like, Bob, and I'll walk in the door.

Speaker 4 You go inside. There are tunnels made of this stuff going right and left.

Speaker 4 In fact, you walk about 10 feet in, and there's a branch, right or left.

Speaker 4 You guys can do whatever you want as well. You can try to stop him, or you can just watch him go in.

Speaker 72 No, this is obviously going to hurt you more.

Speaker 67 What? It's delicious pie.

Speaker 32 It made me feel incredible.

Speaker 62 Too much of a good thing. It's not that good.

Speaker 86 I've had one bite, Kai.

Speaker 30 There's too much here. I know you're going to have more than one bite.

Speaker 91 Are we all aware that he's taken damage from eating it?

Speaker 4 He hasn't taken damage. He actually feels better now.

Speaker 87 You guys got to eat your Bob's food.

Speaker 43 I don't know.

Speaker 72 I have a bad feeling about this.

Speaker 86 No!

Speaker 67 Listen, I took one bite and I realized we don't have to

Speaker 50 do what we were doing before.

Speaker 33 We just have to run into as many tunnels as we can.

Speaker 49 How many tunnels are there in front of us right now?

Speaker 4 I mean,

Speaker 4 it looks like a complicated, almost like a treehouse, like a Robinson Caruso treehouse of different branching pathways that go up and down.

Speaker 4 Brennan, Padman,

Speaker 4 you do recall what you were trying to find, which was this pig creature. And you hear faintly down one of the halls, go, go, go, go, go.

Speaker 76 I hear the gum gob!

Speaker 87 Gub, gob, go, go. It's down there.

Speaker 67 Maybe it's got my bomb.

Speaker 32 And I'm going to start running.

Speaker 3 Okay.

Speaker 43 It might be another illusion.

Speaker 4 So you're gone. You're running down the...
Which way did you go, left or right?

Speaker 4 I assume I heard it down the left.

Speaker 65 Yes.

Speaker 65 Go down the left.

Speaker 4 Okay, so you're off down the left.

Speaker 4 What are you guys going to do?

Speaker 62 You guys made me take the right. I'm going to go see if this guy's okay.

Speaker 4 You're going to go right?

Speaker 65 I'm going to go left. Oh, you're going to go left.

Speaker 3 Okay.

Speaker 72 Wait, and just to be clear, so he feels better, but he took hit points.

Speaker 4 So he took temporary hit points, which means he's actually got more hit points now than when he started.

Speaker 3 So he's doing better. Oh, okay.

Speaker 4 Yes, he's doing better.

Speaker 3 He's feeling right.

Speaker 72 We should all eat the

Speaker 63 hitting.

Speaker 4 Oh, I don't know. That's up to you.
I'm just

Speaker 32 risky, but I'm not touching that thing.

Speaker 67 You see, my eyes get really big. Everyone, do it too.

Speaker 3 Do it too.

Speaker 80 Alright, yeah, I think there must be something

Speaker 39 fishy about that.

Speaker 62 Padman convinced me to eat mushrooms once. Not a good time, so I'm not doing this again.

Speaker 67 That's the only way to build a beauty.

Speaker 3 I don't want to do that. You know what?

Speaker 72 I've been really scared, and I've been really nervous, and

Speaker 95 that's held me back. And so, you know what?

Speaker 64 I'm going to take a chance. And I'm going to eat some of that camp.

Speaker 4 You're going in.

Speaker 72 Because it also looks really good.

Speaker 4 Okay, you take a handful bite and roll a d4.

Speaker 4 That's the triangle looking one.

Speaker 3 How do I tell what three? That's the one on the three.

Speaker 4 You add three temporary extra hit points to your total.

Speaker 4 Now roll a wisdom save.

Speaker 56 That's

Speaker 56 not great.

Speaker 73 Five plus two or seven.

Speaker 4 Yeah, something about that left passageway is calling to you. You have to go.
You have to go right now. I have to go.

Speaker 3 I have to go.

Speaker 4 So you've just watched two of your friends dart down this down this hallway. Are you going to follow or are you going to do something else?

Speaker 80 I still feel pretty full from that jerky before, so but I definitely think we should follow them and see

Speaker 82 if they found anything down there.

Speaker 51 I mean, yeah, I guess so.

Speaker 62 But I'm not eating that.

Speaker 32 Let's just go after them. Okay, what happens?

Speaker 4 You tear in, you're both gonna go in after them yes all right you follow down uh the hallway um

Speaker 4 uh you can hear their their footsteps up ahead you're you're running down the uh the hall to meet them um

Speaker 4 how do i want to do this uh okay for all of you uh you you rejoin each other uh at another one of these um

Speaker 4 splits um

Speaker 4 one hallway goes right one hallway goes left someone decide which way way you guys are going to go.

Speaker 62 Can I make

Speaker 62 what would it be? Would it be insight or investigation?

Speaker 4 If it's investigation, what are you looking for? And if it's insight, what are you doing?

Speaker 62 I'm trying to hear if I can catch any more gub go's okay great.

Speaker 4 Perception check.

Speaker 49 13.

Speaker 4 You do hear a faint gub gob gu-ub gob gub down the right path.

Speaker 75 Well,

Speaker 45 should we go after it?

Speaker 73 Dealing with the music.

Speaker 4 Can I make the same perception check?

Speaker 25 Sure, go ahead. Same thing.

Speaker 34 13.

Speaker 4 Also down the same path, yes.

Speaker 45 All right, here we go.

Speaker 4 All right, you guys go.

Speaker 4 Everybody roll a dexterity saving throw. The floor falls out from under you.

Speaker 32 Dexterity.

Speaker 32 Where's that one?

Speaker 4 Okay.

Speaker 4 So I got a 21. Amazing.
That's great.

Speaker 79 A 14.

Speaker 84 Great.

Speaker 45 I got a.

Speaker 9 I got a 10.

Speaker 4 Okay. So the two of you

Speaker 4 are friends who have taken a bite of the forbidden fruit

Speaker 4 fall.

Speaker 4 You find yourself suddenly falling

Speaker 4 and you land with a thud in a pit about 15 feet down below. The two of you manage to avoid this trapdoor that has just opened up from under them.

Speaker 4 You're still up top in the tunnel. This is my sick whip.

Speaker 4 Yes, in fact, Skye was about to fall, but you were so deft that you grabbed Skye and pulled her back just at the last minute. You guys are at the bottom of a pit.
The walls are smooth.

Speaker 4 There's no rope or ladder, only darkness and silence.

Speaker 47 You guys okay down there?

Speaker 90 What happened? No.

Speaker 39 Are you hurt? Do you see anything?

Speaker 67 Oh, there's no go-go down here. I'm okay.

Speaker 86 Do you need to help get a gouch?

Speaker 88 Um, my god, the walls feel like they're pretty, uh, like they're closing in a little bit.

Speaker 70 Closing in.

Speaker 71 I can hear that my friend is starting to get panicked.

Speaker 82 Of course.

Speaker 69 And so I use my marvelous pigments to

Speaker 69 draw a painting of a rope.

Speaker 25 Okay.

Speaker 91 And I'm going to lower it down for her.

Speaker 4 Okay, that's going to take you a second to do. So as you start to paint with these

Speaker 4 pigments, you're trying to paint the image of a rope. Amazing.
That's going to to take you just a second. And while it's happening, for the two of you, a flash of bright gray light temporarily

Speaker 4 blinds you. Please roll an intelligence saving throw.

Speaker 3 What's going on?

Speaker 3 Oh, this is so weird.

Speaker 4 10. Okay.

Speaker 59 And savings are right here. 17.

Speaker 4 That's really great. For you, Padman,

Speaker 4 this light that temporarily blinds you, it doesn't last long,

Speaker 4 but for a moment, the world around you goes goes blurry, loses a bit of its color. And when your eyes readjust to the new visuals, you find yourself in a memory,

Speaker 4 a flashback.

Speaker 66 Oh no.

Speaker 4 This is a pivotal moment in your life, a moment of realization, or decision, or regret. It could be when you were very young, it could be at the camp.

Speaker 4 But it was a pivotal moment in Jessup, not in Jessup's life, in

Speaker 4 Padman's life. Can you describe to me what this moment was?

Speaker 3 Um,

Speaker 74 there was a moment

Speaker 44 prior

Speaker 51 to

Speaker 30 Padman's dad

Speaker 74 is not comfortable.

Speaker 50 He's filthy fucking rich

Speaker 74 and is a merchant and a sailor.

Speaker 67 And there was a moment.

Speaker 68 When I was very little

Speaker 8 when I first started coming to the camp, and I overheard a conversation between my mom and my dad

Speaker 8 about splitting the summer,

Speaker 8 because I said that I didn't want to go to camp for the whole summer, because now that I was old enough to go to camp, I'd also be old enough to work on my dad's ship.

Speaker 8 And I overheard my dad talking to my mom about finding a way for me to not go

Speaker 83 because he thought I'd be a liability.

Speaker 8 And so the next morning I said that I'd changed my mind and I wanted to go to camp for the whole summer.

Speaker 4 This memory floods back so realistically, it's like you were there reliving it, reliving all the emotions of it,

Speaker 4 and it distracts you. It distracts you so much that you don't see the four small pipes open on the side of the pit and molten lava start to slowly bubble out of the pipes.

Speaker 4 Pooling around your feet.

Speaker 4 You resisted the

Speaker 4 flash of light

Speaker 4 and so this effect does not affect you. So you definitely see that there is lava spilling out around your feet right now.

Speaker 4 You have a few seconds to react and you see your friend Padman here sort of staring into the wall, lost in thought, unable to sort of move or do anything. You're still painting.

Speaker 4 It's going to maybe take you another few seconds. What's What's everybody doing?

Speaker 49 Why are you painting? I have a rope in my bag.

Speaker 62 I take my rope off.

Speaker 62 And I'm going to toss my rope down.

Speaker 36 Great. And I yell out, Jessup, catch.

Speaker 63 My

Speaker 64 clumsy hands grab onto it.

Speaker 4 And yes, sure enough, you take hold of it. You've got it.
What would you like to do?

Speaker 70 I...

Speaker 79 Am I strong enough to grab him?

Speaker 45 Oh boy.

Speaker 4 I mean, you're a medium creature or a small? You're a small creature,

Speaker 4 Um, but you're not very strong, are you, uh, Jessup? Let me look at your strength. Negative one to strength.
Uh, this is gonna be a tough lift, but you can try because you gotta pull.

Speaker 4 Just pulling yourself is hard enough. Now you're gonna have to pull another dude.
Um, let's see if you can do it. Uh, let's roll for strength and see if you can carry both of your

Speaker 4 guys up the rope.

Speaker 4 14.

Speaker 4 14.

Speaker 37 Not quite great.

Speaker 4 Just shy. You do start to make it up a little bit, but it's a really hard pull because of his weight, the extra weight.
He's still down there. The lava is getting closer.

Speaker 4 In fact, I would say it's licking at Cadman's feet, and Padman is going to take one point of damage.

Speaker 68 Do I snap out of my reverie?

Speaker 4 You can roll to see if you do.

Speaker 4 Go ahead.

Speaker 4 This is an intelligence age. 12.
Still not good enough, I'm so sorry.

Speaker 91 Can I snap him out of his reverie?

Speaker 4 How would you like to do that?

Speaker 91 Question, if I do that,

Speaker 91 would he be able to possibly freeze himself?

Speaker 4 If he's out of his trance, why not?

Speaker 69 I

Speaker 71 want to try to send a firebolt not at him, but next to him.

Speaker 4 Amazing.

Speaker 4 Okay, great.

Speaker 25 You're going to shoot fire at the lava?

Speaker 38 Great, let's do it.

Speaker 4 First, flip a coin to see if you can get your wizard act together. Come on, come on.

Speaker 4 It's heads. Okay, so a firebolt bolt indeed originates from your hand, face, feet.

Speaker 69 Yeah,

Speaker 69 I swirl it, and I say, I.

Speaker 57 I swirl it. I swirl it.

Speaker 55 I do a swirling motion, and I say the words as I remember them.

Speaker 69 I'm a bit stressed, but they do come to me.

Speaker 91 Okay, great.

Speaker 4 The firebolt flashes right in front of your face. It's a bright light, and go ahead and roll again to see if if you can break out of this reverie.

Speaker 4 That's an eight.

Speaker 4 Still not there.

Speaker 72 I wonder, is there a way in which I can use my panic,

Speaker 79 my wild magic panic, possibly in my favor

Speaker 79 by seeing if I can get a spell, by panicking, and seeing if I can get a spell that could possibly help us?

Speaker 4 Okay, you're just gonna cast a spell and hope that it's random?

Speaker 45 Great. I love it.

Speaker 4 Go ahead and first roll your D6. I'd say you're at level two of of panic now, unless you think that you're even more.

Speaker 72 I'm pretty panicked right now.

Speaker 79 Yeah, I'm level two.

Speaker 65 Level two sounds good.

Speaker 4 Okay, so roll a D6 and see if you

Speaker 68 is the normal one. Right.

Speaker 4 And see what tell me what you land on.

Speaker 56 Six.

Speaker 4 Okay, your spell works. So what spell were you casting?

Speaker 73 I have no spell that helps us here.

Speaker 5 No.

Speaker 3 It did not work.

Speaker 43 I am, I I guess,

Speaker 4 yes, charmed person.

Speaker 78 Or sorcerer. Can I sorcerer's burst to like blow a hole in the thing that we're

Speaker 11 sure?

Speaker 4 So it's like you're at the bottom of a well. It's round, and there's some pipes sticking out that lava is bubbling through.
So you could try to blast the pipes so that they would stop or something.

Speaker 4 You don't really know what's on the other side of this.

Speaker 78 I can't try and blast it so that a wall breaks down.

Speaker 79 So I see what's on the other side.

Speaker 4 Go ahead and fire away. Roll to hit, I guess.

Speaker 62 Usually, when lava is coming from somewhere, there's more lava behind you.

Speaker 3 I don't know, but we need to

Speaker 79 11

Speaker 63 plus, I think, three, right here.

Speaker 4 Sure, that hits, and then just roll for damage, I suppose.

Speaker 4 That's a D8 to see how much damage you cause to the wall.

Speaker 51 Right there, you got it.

Speaker 4 Two. Okay, and you're aiming at just the wall.

Speaker 48 Uh,

Speaker 72 yep.

Speaker 4 Okay, it's a pretty solid wall. Uh, your uh your sorceress burst hits into the side and sort of ricochets around all over the place, causing cracks and stuff to the wall.

Speaker 4 It doesn't cause it a whole bunch of damage, but it's so loud and startling that once again you get to roll an intelligence saving. This is the one.

Speaker 84 This is the one.

Speaker 36 You got this.

Speaker 3 Nope, nine. Oh, no.

Speaker 4 You take another

Speaker 4 two points of damage. I'm out of temp HP.
Okay.

Speaker 69 Surely to mercy, my rope is ready by now and I can lower myself down to ground.

Speaker 4 Your rope is 100% ready. You guys watch as, well, you watch as her paint solidifies and becomes a solid rope

Speaker 4 made by the finest, what's a rope maker called?

Speaker 3 A luthier. Thank you.

Speaker 3 I made that up.

Speaker 65 A luthier is a violin, a violin maker. Is that right?

Speaker 66 Yes, it's a Mercer.

Speaker 4 What did did they make?

Speaker 3 Oh, it's wool, right?

Speaker 25 Okay.

Speaker 4 Anyway, your rope is awesome. You tie it off against.
You tie it off against Kai.

Speaker 5 All right.

Speaker 4 And you slide yourself down.

Speaker 38 Look at the other rope in my hand in this one.

Speaker 3 Hold them both.

Speaker 4 Okay. You slide down.
You are in the pit.

Speaker 4 What do you want to do?

Speaker 71 I want to try to use my muscles to grab the scruff of his neck.

Speaker 3 Yes, you are.

Speaker 4 You're channeling your inner

Speaker 4 barbarian instincts to sort of grab him and use your strength to pull him up. Yeah.
You're not going into a rage.

Speaker 73 No, certainly not.

Speaker 4 Certainly not. Okay, so this will just be a clean strength roll.
Go ahead. A Mercer is a dealer in textile fabrics.
Thank you. I knew it.

Speaker 59 I knew it was something.

Speaker 73 It's only a five.

Speaker 4 If only you had been raging.

Speaker 82 And

Speaker 55 for strength, that's a plus two, it's a seven.

Speaker 4 You can't quite get him, but maybe together you could on the next round. But for right now,

Speaker 4 you're gonna take three points of lava damage.

Speaker 4 And the lava is pooling up higher and higher.

Speaker 4 Oh, no.

Speaker 39 So what is the situation?

Speaker 3 We have three people.

Speaker 3 I'm holding two ropes and three people down there.

Speaker 43 I'm really panicking again. I'm really wondering if I maybe I try and cast another spell.

Speaker 4 Go for it. What spell are you trying to cast?

Speaker 71 I'm trying to cast

Speaker 95 perhaps an infestation that

Speaker 78 a bunch of birds come from below and lift us up.

Speaker 4 Sure, yeah. Why not? Go ahead and roll your D6.
I'd say you're at a three stress at this point.

Speaker 3 Well, three does something different.

Speaker 4 Okay, then we'll just say two.

Speaker 63 Two.

Speaker 4 Okay, your spell does not work.

Speaker 4 Instead, your nervousness makes it fire off in a crazy way. Roll a D100 and tell me what you get.

Speaker 83 Oh my god, does this do anything?

Speaker 78 24.

Speaker 78 What is that?

Speaker 4 Describe yourself again.

Speaker 78 You don't have to look, I got you. Oh, I'm

Speaker 79 5'11 and tall and thin and hunched over.

Speaker 4 And what color is your skin?

Speaker 44 Blue.

Speaker 4 Okay, your skin turns blue.

Speaker 3 Is that all?

Speaker 4 It's a vibrant shade of blue. Wow.
It's a slightly different shade of blue.

Speaker 67 Did you just change your skin to a slightly different shade of blue?

Speaker 38 What are you guys doing with my suntan? I'm trying. I'm panicking sad.

Speaker 4 Okay, you guys are both down there. Kai, if you want to try anything, now's your chance.

Speaker 3 Okay.

Speaker 38 So.

Speaker 32 I'm going to jump down there too.

Speaker 3 Oh, my God.

Speaker 29 I jumped down there.

Speaker 4 I jumped jumped down there!

Speaker 44 Yes.

Speaker 3 And I do have...

Speaker 65 I'm living for this. I'm living for this.

Speaker 76 Let's walk Sam slowly into a full kid camp TPK on camera. How many of you lie?

Speaker 30 And I say, don't worry, guys.

Speaker 62 I got this under control.

Speaker 37 Okay.

Speaker 30 So.

Speaker 4 You land deftly right next to everybody's really crammed in down there.

Speaker 4 It's not a large hole.

Speaker 4 You land in a puddle of lava.

Speaker 57 Oh, dear.

Speaker 3 Ouch.

Speaker 4 You take one point of damage. Okay.

Speaker 38 So

Speaker 62 here's what I want you to do.

Speaker 35 I want you to throw her out of there

Speaker 62 whenever you get a chance.

Speaker 62 And I'm going to grab Padman, and I have my ring of jumping.

Speaker 4 Oh, you do.

Speaker 62 And I'm going to try to jump out of here.

Speaker 4 Okay, great.

Speaker 4 Sky, are you going to throw her out?

Speaker 71 Not when I have a spell that I can use.

Speaker 66 Great.

Speaker 4 Okay, so let's see how this throw works. You loft Padman into your hands and throw.

Speaker 40 No, I'm going to jump.

Speaker 4 Oh, jump. That's right.
It just happens. You just jump.
That's right. It's an easy jump for you as you activate your, what is it, a ring of jump?

Speaker 36 My ring of jump. Okay.

Speaker 4 You easily jump Padman and yourself out of the hole. You are free.
You are both clear. And you come back to your senses

Speaker 4 confused at what just happened. Oh my God.

Speaker 76 Our friends. I jumped back in the hole.

Speaker 4 Is that true?

Speaker 35 I have a 21 strength and a standing leap of 15 feet.

Speaker 25 Well, now you're going to conscious.

Speaker 67 And a climb speed.

Speaker 87 So I come out and I go, ha, what are you doing?

Speaker 44 And I jump back.

Speaker 76 And I will grab my friends.

Speaker 67 I think with the 21 strength, I can have a game.

Speaker 4 However, on landing, you take another two points of damage.

Speaker 4 And with the strength of your amphibian leg muscles, you leap both of your friends out of the. I would say that you have to do them one at a time.
They're large. They're large.

Speaker 4 So who would you like to take first?

Speaker 3 I, who, who acts next in initiative?

Speaker 4 We didn't roll initiative,

Speaker 4 but probably

Speaker 4 Eden was going to do something.

Speaker 74 You can get yourself out just fine because you're very strong.

Speaker 30 I'm going to grab Jessup and get you out of there.

Speaker 3 Okay, Jessup.

Speaker 4 Also, everybody is clear except for Skye. What are you going to do? In fact, while you're thinking about it, you take

Speaker 66 four points of damage

Speaker 91 and how do I put this in there like this?

Speaker 4 You can also keep track of it on your page.

Speaker 91 Is that the HP damage?

Speaker 43 I can go down four points.

Speaker 3 Yeah, wow.

Speaker 70 Um, oh, but it didn't save.

Speaker 51 Well, I'll figure that out.

Speaker 16 Uh,

Speaker 3 um,

Speaker 3 all right, well, all right, all right,

Speaker 80 I could can I can can I climb out without using a spell?

Speaker 4 You can. It's a perfectly smooth

Speaker 4 pit. The stone is perfectly smooth, or it was before your shot.
Your shot caused a whole bunch of cracks to form all around that you could use to climb out.

Speaker 49 There's also the rope.

Speaker 71 Is there still the rope?

Speaker 43 I thought you dropped the rope.

Speaker 49 I didn't drop it.

Speaker 62 I jumped down there, but the ropes are still up there.

Speaker 4 I guess.

Speaker 71 I thought you were holding the rope and then you just dropped them.

Speaker 4 I think you jumped down while you were holding the rope.

Speaker 36 Sorry, I misremembered.

Speaker 3 The ropes are gone.

Speaker 44 Did you throw the rope?

Speaker 3 Well, now the ropes are gone.

Speaker 38 The ropes are down

Speaker 3 with you.

Speaker 71 I'm going to try to use my jump spell.

Speaker 44 You have a jump spell?

Speaker 71 I have a jump spell.

Speaker 4 Okay, great. Go ahead and cast it with your barbarian wizard of village.
First roll to see if this spell even works.

Speaker 72 It works.

Speaker 4 And sure enough, you cast this spell on yourself and feel invigorated to jump as high as you'd like to.

Speaker 4 Boop.

Speaker 5 You're out. You made it.

Speaker 89 You guys did it.

Speaker 86 Good job.

Speaker 38 You didn't die in a pit.

Speaker 90 That was chaotic.

Speaker 4 That's a wrap for part one of this podcast episode. Part two is heading your way this upcoming Tuesday at 5 a.m.
Pacific, and we'll pick up this adventure right where we left off.

Speaker 4 Until next time, we'll be back at Camp Wildmount before you know it.

Speaker 10 I'm going to put you on, nephew.

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Speaker 19 Period.

Speaker 20 That's 20% lower.

Speaker 21 And you get a free Samsung 5G phone when you bring your number.

Speaker 7 Only at Metro.

Speaker 22 Five-year guarantee on eligible plans, exclusions, applies.

Speaker 15 See website for details. Not available at Fab Metro with T-Mobile in the past six months.

Speaker 23 Tax supplies.