Denny's 4 with Jesse Farrar

Speaker 1 This is a Head Gum Podcast.

Speaker 2 Want to watch this episode? Check it out on our YouTube channel by going to youtube.com/slash Doughboys Media.

Speaker 3 Extra value meals are back. That means 10 tender juicy McNuggets and medium fries and a drink are just $8

Speaker 1 only at McDonald's.

Speaker 2 For limited time only, prices and participation may vary.

Speaker 4 Prices may be higher in Hawaii, Alaska, and California, and for delivery.

Speaker 5 As a small business owner, you you know that change is the name of the game. Operational costs, labor markets, tariffs.
Wouldn't it be nice if something stayed the same?

Speaker 5 How about your business internet rate?

Speaker 6 Get reliable, secure 5G business internet from T-Mobile for business for $50 a month with a five-year price guarantee when paired with a voice line.

Speaker 6 That's the stability you need from a partner you can depend on. Switch now at t-mobile.com/slash bi.

Speaker 2 Plus taxes and fees, guarantee exclusions like taxes and fees applies to the exclusions and details at tmobile.com.

Speaker 4 In 1940, the McDonald brothers, Dick and Mac, opened their eponymous burger restaurant in the SoCal city of San Bernardino.

Speaker 4 While these days they're best remembered for having their creation Zuckerberged away from them by franchising kingpin Ray Kroc, their chain and their name endures.

Speaker 4 But a decade and change later, over in the Hoosier state, a different set of enterprising brothers, Frank and Donald Thomas, along with Robert Wildman, founded their own hamburger joint called Burger Chef.

Speaker 4 McDonald's and Burger Chef would spend the 50s through the 70s competing for superiority. In 1971, Burger Chef was amazingly the nation's second-largest chain restaurant overall.

Speaker 4 And in 1977, Burger Chef and current beef number two Burger King would co-pioneer a new frontier in the fast food wars, movie tie-ins.

Speaker 4 With no one yet willing to pay up for exclusivity, the chains embarked on a duel of the fates with their own Star Wars promotions, Burger Chef offering pretty badass-looking illustrated posters and Burger King offering its better-remembered commemorative drinking glasses.

Speaker 4 Though, as film crush's Matt Singer pointed out, those did contain lead paint. A vintage Burger Chef commercial from the era even features C3PO and R2-D2 requesting the posters from a cashier.

Speaker 4 However, Burger Chef would be bludgeoned when McDonald's entered the tie-in world in 1979. Happy meals with themed toys owning the marketplace from that point onward.

Speaker 4 In 1996, the year McDonald's and Burger King offered dueling Toy Story promotions, Burger Chef shuddered permanently.

Speaker 4 And 29 years later, it's a mostly forgotten piece of 21st Century Americana, briefly revived in the Zeitgeist via season 7 Mad Men plotline.

Speaker 4 Today, vintage Burger Chef chewbaka posters and packaging like the Land Speeder fun box now go for hundreds on eBay.

Speaker 4 But far more significantly, tie-in meals with films and other narrative art are now ubiquitous and inescapable.

Speaker 4 And with a new feature comedy offering themed burgers and nuggets, through its groundbreaking efforts, Burger Chef's bad fortune has become America's good fortune.

Speaker 4 This week on Dough Boys, we return once again to Denny's for the Good Fortune menu.

Speaker 4 Welcome to Dough Boys, the podcast about chain restaurants. I'm Tiger Weiger, along with my co-host,

Speaker 4 one burger after Another,

Speaker 1 Spoon Man Mike Mitchell. This plays into what happened before the episode.
We'll talk about it.

Speaker 4 Hi, Mitch and Nick. Here's a roast to commemorate PTA's kick-ass new movie One Battle After Another.

Speaker 1 Still haven't seen it.

Speaker 4 Wow. I know.
I got to see. I should.
I've been out to see any movies. I got to get out.

Speaker 4 I mean, I can't focus on a movie right now. Yeah.

Speaker 4 I get so fucking stir-crazy. I just got to get out of there.
And I was just like, I want to be able to focus on this thing, you know.

Speaker 1 You just basically go in and jack off and leave, right?

Speaker 4 That's basically it. And, like, you know, the thing you're always hoping for is that movie we're going to sit in it.
You know, like, you're so engaged.

Speaker 1 There's some stuff to jack off to in one battle after another. I'll tell you that.
Okay. All right.

Speaker 4 You have my attention.

Speaker 1 Let's just say the opening. There's some, there's some stuff going on with

Speaker 1 Sean Penn. And

Speaker 1 there's some horniness going on.

Speaker 4 Runner-ups I considered were Bob Bergerson and Steely Dan Dan Dan Dan Dan.

Speaker 1 You guys know what I'm talking about? Did you see it? No one's seen it.

Speaker 4 Bob Bergerson and Steely Dan's Dirty Fork. Just want to say, Nick, congrats on your extreme T-levels.
And also, I'm so glad you became an entertainer over a nursing school. Entertainer used lightly.

Speaker 4 You mentioned the gang you provided so much joy and laughter to so many people over there. That wasn't in the note.
That was my aside. I shouldn't have said that.
That undercut the

Speaker 1 guy said it. Say this.
You know what?

Speaker 4 I'm going to take it again.

Speaker 1 No, we're not going to. I'm taking it again.

Speaker 4 We're Bob Bergerson and Steely Dan's. So I'm going to just use the retake.
I don't know if they consider we're Bob Bergerson and Steely Dan's Dirty Fork.

Speaker 4 Just want to say, Nick, congrats on your Extreme T-level. And also, I'm so glad you choose to become an entertainer over nursing school over the years.

Speaker 1 Entertainer used lightly.

Speaker 4 You mentioned the gang have provided so much joy and laughter to so many people over the years. And the show is something I look forward to each week.
Love you, boys. Cheers.

Speaker 4 Mason from from Colorado, roasts at birdfuck.com. Yes.

Speaker 4 So the one burger after another roast, which is well crafted, Mason, comes on the heels of, you know, our guest tool introduced in a second is a is a wise.

Speaker 1 We had,

Speaker 1 if you listen to the last soup double, you're probably like, P you, that was a stinky one. Yeah.

Speaker 1 We had a bad double.

Speaker 4 We had a bad double that was last week's double. I think it would have been two weeks ago at this point, right?

Speaker 1 And we're recording this episode afterwards. And they're like, we need a good episode.
We need a good episode.

Speaker 1 We really do. And I was like, let me see here.

Speaker 1 We need like a guest that's going to come in here and change the energy. And I look at this.
It's like, oh, fuck.

Speaker 1 We're maybe fucked, Wats. We're possibly fucked.

Speaker 1 You're going to slump.

Speaker 1 We're going to hit a, we're, we're, we're 0 for 2 today, which is fine. I'm just calling it right now.
We're going to be 0 for 2.

Speaker 4 I think there's a chance this. I think this episode is going to be good.
I think we're going to have a good time.

Speaker 1 All right. We'll see what happens.

Speaker 4 And speaking of our guest, we'll introduce in just a second here.

Speaker 4 Recently, somebody recently had a child. This is public knowledge, is the thing you've talked about.

Speaker 1 That's true.

Speaker 4 And was your third child. That's right.

Speaker 4 And this guy is virile.

Speaker 1 Check his T-level. Well, not as much lately.

Speaker 1 You know,

Speaker 1 the first couple of go-arounds was actually... It was a cinch.

Speaker 1 But, you know, as you get older,

Speaker 1 a couple more bites at the app.

Speaker 4 It takes a little more doing. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Which I'm happy to do. There you go.

Speaker 1 I just don't want to think about you. I don't want to think about you in that way at all, basically.

Speaker 1 Basically, the only stuff you've said to me so far today has about, has been about your cock.

Speaker 1 It's sort of unfair that I can't volley it back your way.

Speaker 4 Anyway, this context

Speaker 4 gives us that

Speaker 4 our guest was.

Speaker 4 We asked if he'd seen one battle after another, had not. And I thought I had the clever bonemo of like, these days for you, it's more like one rattle after another.

Speaker 1 And Mitch, you hit the roof.

Speaker 1 I did. I said, Wags, take a look here.
Went to my notes app, searched Rattle.

Speaker 1 And what came up, Wags,

Speaker 1 your exact pun. Yeah.
One rattle after another, baby ass bitch. That's what I was going to say to you from October 10th, 2025.

Speaker 4 And you also didn't know the roast was one burger after another.

Speaker 1 I did not know that.

Speaker 4 So this is like a nice little bit of kismet here, but you could have, if that hadn't hadn't happened in the kitchen, you could have come right at me with that right in the immediate aftermath.

Speaker 1 100%. It would have been so tight and so good.
It would have been so much fun. And now it's just fucking a disaster.

Speaker 4 Emma, let's grab that alt and we can maybe use the alt.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 4 Along with my co-host, one burger after another, the spoon man, Mike Mitchell.

Speaker 1 Hey, you know what it's like for you? One rattle. Fuck.

Speaker 1 Rosa Burfer.

Speaker 1 You know what it's like for you? You're like one rattle after another, you baby ass bitch. Fuck.
It should be one burger after another by

Speaker 1 P-I-T-A.

Speaker 4 Oh, like PETA Anderson.

Speaker 1 By PETA Anderson.

Speaker 4 Peter Anderson.

Speaker 1 Peter Anderson's pretty good.

Speaker 4 Peter Anderson's pretty fucking good.

Speaker 1 It's pretty good.

Speaker 1 Peta Anderson. But do we sound too much like Lois?

Speaker 4 That's the whole issue with Peter.

Speaker 1 Yeah, we do. Peta.
Peter. Yeah, yeah.
Peter.

Speaker 1 PETA.

Speaker 4 That's cute. Always coming in clutch with the Lois impression from Emilia over the Deus.

Speaker 1 God damn. Wages, fall back.
We're in the fall back zone. We're in the fall back zone.
Haven't we been in the fallback zone? No.

Speaker 1 We haven't? November 1st is when it happens.

Speaker 4 October is not fall?

Speaker 1 Fall back,

Speaker 1 which is the daylight savings.

Speaker 4 Oh, that's what you're talking about. The daylight saving.

Speaker 1 Got it.

Speaker 1 We've fallen back.

Speaker 4 Here's a fun pedantic thing I like to do. It's actually daylight saving time.
It's not savings. People throw the yes in there.

Speaker 1 I regret

Speaker 1 it up at all. Is it really daylight time? Daylight saving time.

Speaker 4 It's stupid.

Speaker 1 I've onboarded that, and that'll be my new personality. Thank you.
That's huge. Can I be honest with you? An improvement.
An improvement. That's a personality.
I know.

Speaker 1 Daylight saving time. It is.
Hey, one extra hour at the bar last weekend, dude. I know you took advantage of that.

Speaker 4 You know it. Yeah.
Staying past last call.

Speaker 1 That's my bar. Or two last call.

Speaker 4 That's, I'm doing that all the time.

Speaker 1 60 more minutes of slaying trim, my guys. You know what I'm saying? Oh, yeah.

Speaker 1 Do they do it anymore? They used to do it at birds. They would let you stay because I think it is 3 a.m.
It goes to, is that what it is? It goes to two a.m.

Speaker 1 No, yeah. Yeah, you fall back.
So you go back from 2 a.m. to 1 a.m.
I swear to God they used used to let you do this. I think some bars do, I think.
Okay.

Speaker 1 There's a bar in Boston called the Corner Tavern that was like on mass have, like, underneath some building somewhere. It's like a dive bar, and they used to let we knew that.

Speaker 1 So we would go there because you get the extra hour.

Speaker 4 Yeah, I bet it's the kind of bullshit that is actually legislated. Like there is some rule about like what you like, but but they could probably get slip under the radar either way.

Speaker 1 Yeah. I like, I like this time of year.
I think that this is more of my, like, I think my

Speaker 1 cicadian rhythm.

Speaker 1 Is it circadian rhythm? Circadian? Is it circadian? Yeah. It's not cicadian.
You actually have a circadian rhythm.

Speaker 1 You're saying I suck or it's like the bug?

Speaker 1 Whichever one.

Speaker 1 Oh, the bug. It's like a small bug.
Oh, it's a small bug. You're saying, comparing it to my bug.
It's a small bug, and you only come once every seven years.

Speaker 4 What is a voracious load?

Speaker 1 Everyone's really annoyed about it.

Speaker 1 Come on, dude. Oh, he's fucking doing it again.

Speaker 1 Once every seven years, they do, they got something right, those bugs. They go sleep for seven years.
They come up and they and they mate, and then that's it, right? Right. Yeah.
And then they die.

Speaker 1 I think they die, right? Yeah, because then there's like their shells around, right? Yeah. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Yeah, those shells. Good way to go.
Good way to go. I think it sounds like a better life to me, honestly.

Speaker 4 Being unconscious for most of its time.

Speaker 1 Are they unconscious? I thought they were just kind of sleeping. I don't know.

Speaker 1 What do you think sleep is? What do you think sleep is? I mean, you dream and so on during it.

Speaker 4 So they're having little cicada dreams.

Speaker 1 Yeah, yeah. That's fine.

Speaker 1 I guess it is. I guess it's, I guess you're not conscious.
Don't be upset.

Speaker 1 It's not a big deal.

Speaker 4 All their dreams are fantasies about fucking to death.

Speaker 1 Pretty good. I mean,

Speaker 1 look, we before this started, we said that, and I don't know if I've said this on the show before, there should be a

Speaker 1 nightmare on Elm Street that a Christmas nightmare on Elm Street.

Speaker 4 Yeah, would you call it Christmas Christmas night? Because there's Nightmare Before Christmas, but you can't use that IP, obviously.

Speaker 1 I can't use that.

Speaker 4 So it's just, is it a Christmas nightmare before Chris?

Speaker 4 A Christmas nightmare on Elm Street.

Speaker 1 A Christmas nightmare on Elm Street. Probably what it is.
Yeah. Or Nightmare on Elm Street Christmas.
How's that?

Speaker 4 A Nightmare on Elm Street Christmas is pretty good.

Speaker 1 A very nightmare on Elm Street Christmas.

Speaker 4 A very nightmare on Elm Street Christmas.

Speaker 1 That's pretty. I kind of like it.

Speaker 4 Borderline Gilding the Lily, but I do like it.

Speaker 1 I think it's pretty good. Yeah.
I've talked to you before where they should put a C-PAP, like the chubby guy is the hero of the movie because he can't dream. Right.

Speaker 1 And so like Freddy's like, I can't get in there. And like, it's like the guy's like, you know, choking to death basically on his own.
He's having a hundred episodes in a minute or whatever.

Speaker 1 Yeah, yeah. So Freddy can't get, Freddy can't get in there.
That's pretty cool. I think that would be,

Speaker 1 but then the chubby guy has to never be treated for his sleep apnea. Well, he's the key.
Like, he is the key.

Speaker 1 He's like the chosen one, but he's also like essentially tortured for the rest of his life. Yeah, I guess so.

Speaker 4 But are you saying, does he start with a C-pap on?

Speaker 4 And then later on, they figured, like, if you just take that thing off, you're not going to dream.

Speaker 1 You're not going to have the dream, yeah. Okay.
And then I'm saying he's helpful to like the like the in-shape teens and everything like that. You know what I mean? He's the guy who does it.

Speaker 1 Freddy can't get. Yeah.
Do you have an idea of who you would want to be in this role?

Speaker 1 I might take over the role of Freddy. Okay, right.
Okay. You're Freddy? I could be Freddy.
Look,

Speaker 1 Robert England's hard to replace, but sure. If you want, if you were trying to imply that I would be the fat teen, I'm 43 years old.
Well, no, you just said guy who's around teens.

Speaker 1 So I didn't know if that would be.

Speaker 4 She's like, you're just hanging out.

Speaker 1 I don't know if that was your angle. Oh, all right.
Actually, that's kind of fun too because Freddy does, I mean, he is mostly custodian or something.

Speaker 1 He is mostly teens, but he dad's like killed a parent or two. Like, you're Unk and you're around the teens and you're like, you're helping them by not having a good life.

Speaker 1 I mean, yeah, that's, I mean, that could, that, that would work in a way. I think it would work.
Wages. Who wants some white claws? Oh,

Speaker 1 Mitch. Okay, cool.
This guy's cool as well.

Speaker 4 It's like Ma. He's like, you're kind of a Ma sword.

Speaker 1 But it's Unk.

Speaker 4 Oh, man. Unk is a, as a counterpart to Ma is a good pick.

Speaker 1 Unknown is pretty fun, right? Green light that put up a green.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I like that. That's pretty good.

Speaker 1 good unknow is good because there's a different dynamic there altogether with unkn yeah this is kind of this going into the brother acts that we pitched recently i loved that yeah that's i mean brother acts a winner that was so sister act two is is on it's essentially on repeat in the farrow household wow popular popular with the family popular with the family

Speaker 1 that's how you say it okay

Speaker 4 do you like the

Speaker 4 like uh

Speaker 4 is there a reason sister act two resonates over sister act one or are you watching both of them

Speaker 1 That's funny. I wonder.
Yeah, it is. Sister Act II is canonically the one.
Yeah. And that doesn't happen very often.

Speaker 4 I don't know. I mean, I always think a Sister Act is like the movie.
Like, I love Sister Act. I don't think a Sister Act II is better.
I think Sister Act 1 is really well constructed.

Speaker 1 But Back in the Habit has a bigger cultural impact.

Speaker 4 You think so?

Speaker 1 I don't know.

Speaker 1 I'm trying to ride. You're yanking my chain.
I'm trying to round my channel. I don't know.

Speaker 1 Is there anything in the house that plays?

Speaker 4 Great subtitle, Back in the Habit.

Speaker 1 It is great. Is there anything in the house that plays it? You're like, ah, turn that racket off.
You know what I'm saying? Like anything like the...

Speaker 1 Yeah, so lately it's been K-pop Demon Hunters. Okay.
I feel that's very popular. That's very, very, yeah, that's enormous.
Did they watch any like shitty sitcoms or anything like that? Okay.

Speaker 1 The young Sheldon fans? So actually 1,000% all of the shitty sits. Like they, it's funny because a like a laugh tracked multi-cam sitcom is like fucking foreign to teenagers.
Sure.

Speaker 1 So it is like unique to them in a way that to us it's like well here's another one of the million things i grew up watching right and to them it's like what this isn't a fucking cartoon like that it's just like weird to them they don't see it so yeah big bang theory there was a time where big bang theory was always on and now my wife is like okay dad doesn't like it so like let's do something else you've got a problem with the big bang theory huh i just think it sucks i'm sorry i think it really sucks yeah and it's not even their fault I shouldn't make fun of young Sheldon like that.

Speaker 1 He seems like a nice little boy. He's not real.

Speaker 1 You mean the actor? Yeah. If he he was 70 years older, I would set him up with my widowed mother.
Right.

Speaker 1 If young Sheldon was old, Sheldon,

Speaker 1 I would love him to take my mom out.

Speaker 4 That'd be adorable. What if he was like one of those guys who had one of them, like he had like a disease where he looked at him?

Speaker 1 I mean, I think it would still be Nick illegal, if that's what you're asking.

Speaker 4 No, I'm saying, well, what if you found out the actor who plays young Sheldon is currently like a 78-year-old man?

Speaker 1 Oh, wow. And he always has a lot of money.

Speaker 4 He's got that disease.

Speaker 1 Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 4 He's got the Benjamin Button syndrome.

Speaker 1 And I'd say, this checks a lot of boxes. Come and meet my mama.
It checks a lot of boxes. Checks a lot of boxes.
Oat boxes. Checks one box.

Speaker 4 Is of legal age, looks like a child.

Speaker 1 That's interesting.

Speaker 4 To the boxes, I guess.

Speaker 1 I think he seems like a gentleman.

Speaker 4 He does seem like a gentleman.

Speaker 1 I've been saying about a young Sheldon. Everyone should pray for their mother to have an old young Sheldon in their life.
Oh, boy. Everyone should pray for their mother to have an old young Sheldon.

Speaker 1 Yeah. No, you're right.
You know what? Go back to your demon hunters bullshit.

Speaker 1 What is that? You're coming at me. I'm not.
I'm not. I'm not.
I'm having fun.

Speaker 1 They will put on, you know, I know when my wife is feeling, she's in her feelings a little bit. Pride and prejudice will go on.
But I like that one. Yeah, Pride and Prejudice is good.

Speaker 1 That one's our Emma will go on. That's great.

Speaker 1 What is your hat? Sorry. Well, so Mitch, this is funny, actually.
This is wild.

Speaker 4 Play your drop. We got to introduce our guests when we can talk about it.

Speaker 1 All right, I'm gonna hit him with the drop.

Speaker 8 This is a dude thing. It's a dude thing.

Speaker 1 It's a it's a dude thing. Some bitch.

Speaker 8 This is a dude thing. It's a dude thing.

Speaker 9 It's a it's a dude thing. Some bitch.

Speaker 8 This is a dude thing. It's a dude thing.
It's a it's a dude thing.

Speaker 9 Some bitch.

Speaker 8 This is a dude thing. It's a dude thing.

Speaker 9 It's a it's a dude thing. Some bitch.

Speaker 7 Countropula.

Speaker 7 And ladies, we know you're flashing them. Titties and ladies, we know you're flashing them.
Titties and ladies. We know you're flashing them.
Titties and ladies.

Speaker 5 We know you're flashing them. Titties.

Speaker 1 Count Dropula.

Speaker 4 Count Dropula, kind of pulling the Jamaican dance hall move of putting his own name in there.

Speaker 1 I honestly liked it.

Speaker 4 I thought it was pretty good. I like the fart at the end.

Speaker 1 I like the fart at the end. I didn't like what I was saying.

Speaker 1 I don't like to hear myself.

Speaker 4 You didn't like your voice saying, ladies, show me them titties.

Speaker 1 Yes, I didn't like that. I didn't like that.
Is the fart at the end a Count Dropula's signature at this point?

Speaker 4 I think it might be. I think it's kind of his thing.

Speaker 1 Hey, everyone. I'm proud of each of you.
Love Count Dropula. Wow.

Speaker 4 That's really nice. That was good.

Speaker 1 Count Dropula. That was good as hell.
What's up?

Speaker 4 Drops at birdfuck.com.

Speaker 1 I love watching you do your thing, man. You know what I like in.
Can I just talk about something I like in music? Yeah.

Speaker 1 I like in a rock and roll song where there's just a guy talking. You know what I'm talking about?

Speaker 1 Yeah. You know what I mean? You know what I mean?

Speaker 1 We're rocking all time and we're going to keep on rocking a no.

Speaker 1 Yeah, everyone knows what I'm I'm talking about. We gotta keep on rocking for as long as we're rocking.
We're gonna keep on rocking. That's that is not far off, but I'm talking about.
That's great.

Speaker 1 I'm talking about like, you know, like you hear, like, uh,

Speaker 1 um,

Speaker 1 uh,

Speaker 1 Dweezer. Yeah.
You know, uh, uh, call me, baby. What is that? Is that saying ASO?

Speaker 1 Like, it starts off, and when it starts off, they're like, hey, man, I'll see you after the show. You know what I'm talking about? I like that.
I like, I like some, I like a little bit of dialogue.

Speaker 1 I like some dialogue in the song. And I feel like they they don't, I feel like dialogue doesn't happen as much anymore.

Speaker 1 You know what you would love? What's that? Rap skits. I do like rap skits.

Speaker 1 You like the rap skits? I do like rap skits. Yeah.
Eddie Griffin was in Chronic 2001, I believe. Chronic 2001 has some absolutely heinous skits on it.
Yes, it has some bad skits on it.

Speaker 4 Drops at Bitbits.

Speaker 1 It's what got me into comedy, though.

Speaker 4 Send your bad skits to drops at birdfuck.com. Our guest today from YKS and the Golf Kings, our friend Jesse Ferrari.

Speaker 1 IJF. Oh, you got so much for me.
You got gotta introduce him. I didn't really care about that part.
No, of course not, Mitt.

Speaker 1 Of course not, Mitt.

Speaker 1 You don't like a guy talking? You know what I'm talking about? Dave Matthews has a song where a guy's lie in our graves has like them talking a little bit at some point. You know,

Speaker 1 we're gonna lie in our graves. I mean, it's not far off.

Speaker 1 Tonight.

Speaker 1 It doesn't have to be about the song. Yeah, sure.
But you know, when you were talking about, like, we're going to keep on rocking, you know what else I like?

Speaker 1 See if you're on this with me.

Speaker 1 Like a guitarist who's doing a solo, but it's no big deal.

Speaker 1 You know, when he's just like kind of like, when he's just like, he does like a big solo and just kind of, it's like, it's no big, you know what I mean? Like barely, he barely reacts.

Speaker 4 Wait, wait, do you mean, like, do you mean that it's kind of a minimalist solo or do you mean it's a, it's a maximalist solo? It's like

Speaker 1 it sounds fucking

Speaker 1 shredding, but he's just kind of

Speaker 4 acting right now.

Speaker 1 He's like not, he's not, he's just playing it fucking straight. Yeah, that is fun.
Yeah, that's fun as hell. Yeah, it is cool.
It's sort of the Jack Black, Kyle Gass dynamic.

Speaker 1 Jack Black is fucking freaking the fuck out. Yeah.
Yes. And Kyle Gass is kind of doing his thing.

Speaker 4 But those guys will never work together again, I guess. That is true.

Speaker 1 What Kyle Gass did was unacceptable.

Speaker 1 Jack Black is my friend. I'm not taking anything.
I like Jack Black.

Speaker 4 No one knows criticizing Jack Black.

Speaker 1 You left Comedy Central when he came over to say hello. Yeah, we told the story before.
I know.

Speaker 1 He said I. He's your friend.
He is my friend. He did.

Speaker 4 So this is a thing. I mean,

Speaker 4 I would say, yeah, he's your friend, right?

Speaker 1 Like, you see him and you're like, I think he's Mitch's friend.

Speaker 4 I think he knows who Mitch is and is excited to see Mitch.

Speaker 1 Do you think if you asked Jack Black, are you Mitch's friend? He would say, Yes.

Speaker 4 I think you'd say, Who's Mitch?

Speaker 1 Of course.

Speaker 4 But I think he knows who Mitch is.

Speaker 1 If he saw him.

Speaker 4 Yeah, if he saw him, he's like, Hey, how's it going?

Speaker 1 Hey, there's that guy. Yeah.
Yeah. You think you're friends? We're Instagram friends.
That's fine. Oh, boy.

Speaker 1 Who the fuck? What the fuck?

Speaker 1 How many hunters are you friends with?

Speaker 1 This is where I live. There's actors here.
I'm friends with Jack Black.

Speaker 4 JFI, for people who are not familiar with your work, you live out there in Tennessee. I do live in Tennessee.
You are wearing a camo hat, and we did not, it's a bit of a camo print.

Speaker 4 It's not exactly that.

Speaker 1 It's more of a woodland print. But

Speaker 4 we didn't get closure on what the hat actually is. It has

Speaker 4 Japanese, I think, katakana writing there with a number two, Los Angeles 1997. It is a Predator 2 Japanese language hat.

Speaker 1 It is. Very cool.
It is cool. And so you had to start wearing this hat because of some sort of deal with the court?

Speaker 1 who just had to say predator in any any language

Speaker 1 found a technicality

Speaker 1 um yeah well i'm just kind of a movie guy that's yeah it's just kind of a movie well it's very funny that you were wearing a predator to hat because before this started you said that pray

Speaker 1 we go we're talking about we were talking about the best versus movie we're talking about versing because we were talking about freddy's night on a freddie's a nightmare on elm street christmas yes or a very nightmare on elm street christmas And that leads into Freddy vs.

Speaker 4 Jason, which naturally leads into alien versus predator. Whoever wins, we lose.
And then that leads into a larger discussion of the alien and predator franchise.

Speaker 1 And I said I liked Freddy vs. Jason.
Do you want to pause for all the ladies listening to put a towel down before they?

Speaker 1 Because obviously this is.

Speaker 1 We're revving everyone up.

Speaker 4 Yeah. And they're already earlier following your command to show their titties.

Speaker 1 Now you got them soaked to be in the room when those fat losers started talking about their favorite sci-fi franchises. Oh!

Speaker 1 Putting a towel down, that's... Sorry.
I mean, it's just a lot, and it's a lot, right? I'm sorry.

Speaker 4 You got to put a towel down sometimes.

Speaker 1 I guess you do have to put a towel down. I'm just saying.

Speaker 1 This whole show is about guys coming. It's true.
That's true. Can we get a little come for the ladies? Ladies got to come, too.
Ladies got to come too.

Speaker 4 And it's not weird for me to say that.

Speaker 1 It's not weird. And now I will say that our gaze hasn't gone in that direction of the room for a little bit.

Speaker 1 There's now an invisible wall here for the rest of the episode. We're safe if we're over here.
Exactly.

Speaker 4 And we just look at each other.

Speaker 1 That's right.

Speaker 4 And actually, not even Jemmy. No, Jimmy.

Speaker 1 Not even Jimmy.

Speaker 1 Jimmy's the lady. The hands are going in the pocket, and we're saying, ladies, come.

Speaker 1 Ladies come, right?

Speaker 4 You can say whatever you like around me,

Speaker 1 Jemmy, you horny southern bell.

Speaker 1 Us girls do got to get our rocks off. What is Jemmy going for his Halloween? Do we know yet? No.
No clue yet. Oh, so that was the break.
You broke that wall for for us.

Speaker 1 We weren't looking over at the dais, and then

Speaker 1 you said, what is Jemmy going next? I feel like all three of us looked immediately afterwards to break the wall.

Speaker 1 You guys are red as strawberries right now. But I think Emma and I have the kind of relationship where I can ask what her dog is going as for Halloween.
I don't think that's one of those things.

Speaker 1 I haven't thought about it too much. I've never been a huge Halloween person myself.
I'm not a big costume person, so I don't think about it for her. I don't know where we'd go.

Speaker 1 I think she'd hate a party.

Speaker 4 And Jemmy

Speaker 4 isn't crazy about wearing stuff in my opinion.

Speaker 1 No, she has, she does like, she has two hoodies that we wear when it's cold out that she doesn't seem to mind. I actually find they like work like anxiety blankets for her a little bit.

Speaker 1 So when she's anxious and I put it on, she gets all cozied up. But

Speaker 1 a Michelin hoodie.

Speaker 1 Can I give a Halloween suggestion? Yeah. ARFFK.
Like the dog version of ARFFK is really good.

Speaker 1 What would the costume look like? Really good.

Speaker 1 You'd probably have to shock her throat a lot, I guess, to get out.

Speaker 1 Yeah, you could put the shock collar on her throat. You put a little speaker on her.
It's just like RFK quotes. Bar, like, bar.
There's like a little worm right here. Yeah, that's fine.
That's fine.

Speaker 1 Hey, how's it going? You know, RFK9.

Speaker 1 RFK9 is pretty good. That's pretty good.
That's a movie, too, really. I don't know.
Fuck you.

Speaker 1 You came up with a better one. I also thought of a It Should Be Nightmare on

Speaker 1 34th Street. Oh, that's good.
Pretty good. 34th Street.

Speaker 1 What are you doing over there? You trying to?

Speaker 1 I'm coming up with things in my head.

Speaker 4 It's good to brainstorm alts.

Speaker 1 All right, so we should close this wall back off. Close the wall back off.
Let's close it up.

Speaker 4 It would be nice if we could get some slow-closing curtains.

Speaker 1 They're just

Speaker 1 like Amelia and I can do other stuff back here and not have to watch. Or the video feed, or is it in front? Do we just move the cameras up?

Speaker 4 I think you still see them. They're just on the other side.

Speaker 1 I don't want to watch this. So they'd probably be okay with it.
Yeah. I like the idea of a curtain.
We could close it. We could close it during at at the end of the episodes.
It would be fun.

Speaker 1 I like Mario. I want my own, too.

Speaker 1 I would love it. You want the get smart pop.
Yeah, but it's not soundproof in the curtain. I'm just putting that out there.

Speaker 1 You're not even going to notice with me. That thing's going to close and open back up.
I'm done. I'm like a magician.

Speaker 1 The quick change act. The quick change act.

Speaker 4 Well, America's got talent. They fucking love that.

Speaker 1 They do. They're right up.
Did you already say get well soon to Panda the.

Speaker 4 Get well soon to Red Panda.

Speaker 1 Red Panda the.

Speaker 4 NBA,

Speaker 4 because as the NBA season is now underway, as long as it's released, Red Panda, the NBA halftime performer, had an injury.

Speaker 1 Oh, no.

Speaker 4 Yeah, I'm not sure. This happened a while ago.
I'm not sure if they're... I haven't checked up on...
I honestly haven't been monitoring the offseason actually.

Speaker 1 Is this the lady with the bowls? Yeah, she stacks the bowls on the unicycle and stuff. What happened? What do you fucking think?

Speaker 4 Just a really dangerous thing to be doing.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I mean,

Speaker 1 but I don't know what happened. She got hit by a car, Mitch.

Speaker 1 Did she fall during her performance?

Speaker 1 Yes, I believe she.

Speaker 4 Yeah, I think so.

Speaker 1 The bowls, the gnarly. Oh, man, it was gnarly.
Jesus.

Speaker 1 That was a while ago. Yeah, one of the problem was a fan threw a bowl at her and it wasn't the one she was expecting.
And so she tried to grab it with the foot. Oh, no.
The weight was off.

Speaker 1 Because it's a game of inches. Yeah.
Yeah. But, you know, you get so popular, fans start throwing bowls.
You guys have this. Yeah, we're going to be, bowls are being thrown at us all the time.

Speaker 1 Then you went on tour. You said the guy came over and tried to give you a bowl.
And you're like, we do not really, we're not really doing the bowls. We're not really doing a bowl thing.

Speaker 1 in detroit that did happen he gave you the bowl he got a guy tried to give us i think he was trying to give us a bowl he came up on stage yeah yeah nick was

Speaker 4 maybe the most scared i've seen you when the man came up on stage well because i thought it was going to be killed yeah and i part of me was welcoming it right but another part of me was dreading you know the infinite beyond so i i just like i think you just have those those conflicted uh you know emotions thankfully we had venue security aka emma to to step in that's right you were the one who stepped in Yeah, security while

Speaker 4 the security is probably being paid minimum wage, so whatever the fuck, but they were just like standing there with their hands in the pocket.

Speaker 1 They were watching me kick this guy off stage.

Speaker 1 We've run out of stories. No,

Speaker 1 we haven't run out of stories.

Speaker 4 We're always telling new stories. We got new stories all the time.

Speaker 1 Wait, what the fuck you say over there?

Speaker 1 Oh, okay. What's happening? I just caught you red-handed.
Biggest laugh of the night so far.

Speaker 1 I didn't even fully hear me. I missed you to Emma.
Mitch is only saying that because he read the Reddit thread. I was also thinking you read the Reddit thread.

Speaker 1 Are we right?

Speaker 4 Wait, The Reddit Thread was that said that we have too many weird dreams.

Speaker 1 Oh, there was a Reddit thread that said we have, you know what? That was subconsciously what it was.

Speaker 1 We're out of stories. No, no, no, no.
They said, what's your favorite one that's a story?

Speaker 1 It was done in love. They said, what's your favorite story? They said, what's your favorite story? It's like Doughboy, like, what's the Doughboys' lore?

Speaker 4 Like, got it. Got it.

Speaker 1 And it's like us, like, you know, like, Mitch shit is pants. I mean, it's like sucks to be like, oh, that's Leiger shit his pants.

Speaker 1 But that's so.

Speaker 4 I feel like one of the used to be an old favorite that fell out of circulation because it was very early on was me. This is a shitting myself story.
Yes. But

Speaker 4 I was staying with my parents. I was home from college.

Speaker 4 And I woke up pretty early in the fairly early in the morning, earlier than I was going to wake up at the time and had it, like, just a huge fucking hard-on, just like that, one of those turgid, like, you know, teenage hard-ons.

Speaker 4 Went back to

Speaker 1 sleep.

Speaker 4 And

Speaker 4 then woke up later and was just like soaked. And I was like, ah, fuck, I had a wet dream.
This is so embarrassing. And I pulled the sheets back and I shit myself.

Speaker 1 That's so good.

Speaker 1 And you come. And I come, dad.

Speaker 4 I come some come.

Speaker 1 Right. Yeah.
Oh, I feel so good to shit on myself.

Speaker 1 You put that underwear in the fucking, in the hamper with your parents shit.

Speaker 1 We have run out of stories, but that's okay. That's okay.
We're going to make new stories. We're going to make new stories.

Speaker 4 That's part of life.

Speaker 1 You go along.

Speaker 4 You make new stories. You go on new adventures.

Speaker 4 JF, we got to shout out the Peep This Out Boys group chat, which is the, you know,

Speaker 4 it's Dough Boys.

Speaker 4 I know the X is unvoiced, but I'll say it aloud because it's audio medium. It's a Dough Boys X Y K S X Go Off King sort of

Speaker 4 mega mix. It is.
A lot of fun to mix it, to chop it up in there.

Speaker 1 Look, it's a lot of fun. I know Mitch has been busy lately.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 Has he been busy? Or what is it? Do you know what it is?

Speaker 4 I'm not sure. I feel like you dip in and out of certain threads.

Speaker 1 It's been a busy. This year's been busy.
Year? This year has been busy. Wow.

Speaker 1 This year we haven't liked this year.

Speaker 4 I have not liked this year.

Speaker 1 This year's fucked up. It's fucked cops.
It's been a really fucking bad year. This year sucks.
We don't like this year that much. What happened?

Speaker 4 Because I thought, like, first off, it's January.

Speaker 1 I'm like, This is going to be great. Yeah, great year.
We were very excited for the year. Here we go.
And then, yeah, somehow things go haywire. Last year,

Speaker 1 okay, all right. Things are starting to look up.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 And then, you know, things got a little, you know, things that... Things went a little sideways.
Things went a little sideways. They went sideways.
And we ain't talking Giamatti over here.

Speaker 1 I kind of wish we were. Okay.
One of my favorite movies. You guys actually put me on that movie.
Great movie. Sideways.
I had never seen it until you talked about it on a double, I guess it was.

Speaker 1 And I watched it just to keep up. It was fucking great.

Speaker 4 Natalie loves that movie.

Speaker 1 It's nice to hear that, like, you know, there's like

Speaker 1 there's some uncultured swine out there that we like help with on like the day. Oh, sorry.

Speaker 1 Because it's a movie about wine. I don't have culture.
That's what you think. I feel like I'm supposed to be mean to you, but I just don't have it in me.
Yeah, I know. You're doing great.

Speaker 1 I think you're plenty mean.

Speaker 1 You're being a real asshole. I know.
And I don't mean to be an asshole to you. No, I know.
I know. And I.

Speaker 1 We're friends. Yeah.
It's like, it's like you and Jack Black.

Speaker 1 You're my. You know, that's how fucking shitty my life is.

Speaker 1 You're my Jack Black.

Speaker 4 Sideways, as of this year,

Speaker 4 came out 20 years ago. Yeah.
Like I mentioned it did one now, the movie Natalie Loves.

Speaker 4 And

Speaker 4 we'll both watch it. And it's, it's funny because, you know, I'm old enough to have seen it when it came out.
I mean, like 20 years, I guess, whatever.

Speaker 4 But

Speaker 4 I saw it when it came out. And that back then, I'm like, these fucking, these guys are fucking losers.
And I'm watching it now. I was like, oh, this is what life is.

Speaker 1 You know, like you just over time just like, oh yeah you're things don't work out right just like your dreams don't really like you know nothing nothing really you're just kind of like adrift and then you know at a certain point you're just like oh fuck i guess this is what existed you're repeating the same stories on uh podcast yeah i honestly probably said the same take about sideways in a certain no no no no i probably have i'm repeating this fucking take 10 years for a 10 years of telling stories that you should run out of stories that's fine how many stories there's a finite number of stories of one person you guys have a lot of i'll say you you guys both have a breadth of experience in this industry and in your lives that does make for a fucking entertaining podcast.

Speaker 1 That's nice. It's the truth.

Speaker 1 It's the truth. I mean, is it that great when Mitch says, I can't eat Levin Chicken anymore? No, of course that's

Speaker 1 not the best. Why is that? That's not the best one.

Speaker 1 You know what it is. You know what happened.
The best one is, I'm friends with Jack Black.

Speaker 1 That's the best one. And we want to come back to that one.
You wish, you know what?

Speaker 1 If he saw me, he would come over and say hello. We're friendly.
I told you the last time I was here, I saw him on the street. Yeah, I was just watching it.
And he just walks around.

Speaker 1 And I didn't say anything because it was literally right after the Kyle Gass thing. So I couldn't think of anything nice.

Speaker 1 Like, even if I was the person to yell at someone across the street, it would be like, what's your fucking problem? What? That's what you would say?

Speaker 1 If I had said anything, it would have been like, hey, come on, man. Yeah.
You know?

Speaker 1 I disagree with him. With you.
You agree with him? You could just say hello for fuck's sake. Do you agree with him? I'm not.

Speaker 1 I'm not getting involved with this. He's my friend.

Speaker 1 You fucking prick. You could just say hello, Tim.
Tech Black listened to the episode. My friend Mitch was kind of waffling on whether he supports me or not.

Speaker 1 I support Jack Black. I love Jack Black.
His fucking palatial estate. Oh, Mitch doesn't like me.
Oh, you don't think Jack Black could listen to Doughboys? He could.

Speaker 1 He's been in this podcast studio-wise.

Speaker 4 He's been in this podcast or different podcasts.

Speaker 1 Doing different podcasts.

Speaker 4 Not guessing on Doughboys, but he still might listen.

Speaker 1 Jack Black was on the Birthday Boys sketch show.

Speaker 1 He was in the Minecraft movie.

Speaker 1 Yeah, Odenkirk was associated with Birthday Boys. Mr.
Odenkirk. Has he been on Doughboys?

Speaker 1 I tried to get him on at one point, and I told him, and he was like, There's a great Chinese food restaurant we should review. And I was like, that's not what the podcast is.

Speaker 1 But I told Wags, and I was like, maybe we just review this one Chinese food restaurant that Bob's into.

Speaker 1 And then we didn't do whatever.

Speaker 4 Well, didn't he also say, like, oh, this

Speaker 1 show sounds like a bad idea?

Speaker 4 Didn't he say something like that? Yeah, yeah, no.

Speaker 1 I think he said that too, of course. Yeah, yeah.
And he's your friend. He likes

Speaker 1 Odenkirk likes Weiger. Bob is my friend.
You're trying to say he isn't?

Speaker 1 What am I going to play? Fucking you could tell me. Do I have to play hoop with him?

Speaker 1 What's your idea of a friend? Play hoop?

Speaker 1 They're pretty cool.

Speaker 1 What do I got to do to have someone be you and I are technically friends? What the fuck have you ever done? I would agree that we are friends.

Speaker 4 I was at your birthday.

Speaker 1 You were? Yeah, back in Hotlanta. That's right.
I was stuck there.

Speaker 4 God, that was a long fucking time ago.

Speaker 1 I don't mean that against you. I'm not saying I was stuck there.

Speaker 4 You were stuck in Hotlanta.

Speaker 1 I was stuck in Hotlanta.

Speaker 4 We had a lovely time at Antico.

Speaker 1 We went to Antico. I had to leave, so we didn't go to see the movie afterwards, but I could have.
You saw Joker afterwards. It was Joker, right? Oh, man.
I was also scared to go, so I didn't go.

Speaker 1 Well, I was wearing full makeup. Right.

Speaker 1 You know what's crazy is that

Speaker 1 I've had two birthdays where Joker was the movie. Tomorrow War and Twisted Metal Season 2, Joker 2, I went for my birthday.
All you do is a rough watch.

Speaker 4 That's a tough movie.

Speaker 1 I heard it. Lisa Gilroy was growing up.

Speaker 1 She was like ready to jump out of the theater. She was, she was pissed off.

Speaker 1 Which I get. Yeah.
Bad movie. We're friends.
We're friends. But what have you known?

Speaker 1 We've never hooped either.

Speaker 1 But we're basically on the same level. And I know that's hard for you to hear.

Speaker 1 Who do you think is a better?

Speaker 1 What do you mean by that? By level, we have like the same amount of success.

Speaker 1 And I'm not saying I have success. Yeah.
I'm just saying you ain't all that in a bag of chips, Mitchie.

Speaker 1 I think I might kill myself.

Speaker 1 The distance between me and you is a lot smaller than the distance between you and Jack Black. Well, yeah, of course.
One of the most famous

Speaker 1 world. That's what I'm fucking saying.
Oh, I'm close to you. Yes, dude.
I'm fucking. This is what Nick was saying.
Yeah, comparison is the thief of joy. It ain't all that great.

Speaker 1 Yeah, it's being alive. Yeah, it's fine.
It's, you know, whatever. What are you going to do? But to your point, we, so this is coming up.

Speaker 1 So if I, like, like, you know, like, if they would list like Mike Mitchell with like other contemporaries, like Jesse Farrar, that's what UBU, basically, you think?

Speaker 1 I don't think that's that fucking insane. I really don't.
And I don't have a high opinion of myself.

Speaker 4 I think we would, I think it would be that. I think it would be like Mike Mitchell, Jesse Farrar, and

Speaker 4 the mom from the Costco guys.

Speaker 1 She's in some of the videos. Some of them.
Yeah. Some of the videos.
Yeah. Yeah.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 Big Justice's mom. Yeah, Big Justice's mom.
Yeah, because Big Justice is all the way up here. Yeah, way higher.
He texts with Odenkirk all the time.

Speaker 4 And Rizzler, forget about it.

Speaker 1 Rizzler's not there with Jack. Rizzler is one of the, Rizzler is famous.
He's famous. He's real.
He's actually famous. Yeah.
And we're sort of like, well.

Speaker 4 Oh, yeah, I know that guy is.

Speaker 4 You have passionate fans, but you are a niche product. Yeah, that's right.

Speaker 4 It's nice. Hey, that's a great place to be.
You make a living doing this bullshit.

Speaker 1 Can I be honest with you? I won't be happy until I change this. You might be my motivator to be more successful.
That's awesome because the bigger you get, the more I can ride your coattails.

Speaker 1 So that's great for me, too. Fucking Jesus.
I told you. I told you years ago, you need to be the sandler of our group.

Speaker 1 And we just fucking grab onto your tits and you just take us all the way to the fucking moon. Oh, man.
I'd love to be your Schneider. And

Speaker 4 you're slimming down, so there's less and less to grab. I know.

Speaker 1 You got to get to it. I'm getting in right now, dude.
I'm latching on hard. I like Sandler screw, but more right-wing.

Speaker 1 I guess you're the Schneider of the group. I think I would be Schneider.

Speaker 1 You'd be the Schneider of our Sandler group. I mean, I'd love to be Spade, but I know I'm not.
Yeah. I understand it.
I get it. Hey, I get it.

Speaker 1 This guy might get the spade i think he absolutely gets the spade not if you're sandler i'm spade oh i don't know i don't even think i'm sandler you're sandler you're in this formulation you would be sandler to be clear very shitty sandler is what we're saying here like like okay just as famous as rizzler's mom oh sorry big justice's mom level fame yeah sandler group yes i would be the sandler and you would be the spade all right and he would be the rob schneider and hey you know it could be fine db's chris rock yeah sure why not

Speaker 1 i like that db Chris Rock.

Speaker 4 You could make a VOD streaming movie, and some people would watch it.

Speaker 1 So, you know, that's something to do. You fucking went to a film festival, my guy.

Speaker 1 That is true. Listen, hey, once that comes out, who knows what will happen? Also,

Speaker 1 Spade's assistant almost killed him. So, watch your back.
Okay, that's fun, too.

Speaker 4 I don't think the Deus is going to kill me.

Speaker 1 Did you want an extra big bonus?

Speaker 1 What'd you say? He said we get extra big bonuses if we kill him.

Speaker 1 He's incentivizing us.

Speaker 1 I will say this, Wags. If you weren't here,

Speaker 1 it would be hard. It would be very hard to do the podcast.
That's the nicest thing I've ever said to you. It would be, it would be hard to do the podcast if you weren't here.

Speaker 4 What though this is the doughboys is you and me. Look at the fucking logo.

Speaker 1 Yeah, that's true. Yeah.
You know what? And you know what? It would still be pretty easy if Jesse was gone. We've done it without Jesse.

Speaker 4 We've got some reps without Jesse.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I think you guys could stumble along

Speaker 1 if I were somehow taken out of the... Like if if Amelia killed me thinking she would get something.
Yeah, right. And you're not.
You know what I mean? I'd have nothing.

Speaker 4 You're not going to get anything.

Speaker 1 So how did you get the Predator 2 hat and the Hunter and the Hunter camouflage? This is one of those crazy products you can get on the computer. Yeah.
And so I just whipped it up. I picked it up.

Speaker 1 They whipped it up and sent it my way. Oh, yeah.
And yeah.

Speaker 1 Do you usually go Hunter? Do you usually go with the camouflage?

Speaker 1 I don't usually. I have some shorts that fit the mold.
I have some Chubbies shorts, which you've got to

Speaker 1 fuck with Chubbies. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Speaker 1 i think it's a cool it's a cool color because it goes with everything you put like this goes with black jeans or you put a black t-shirt on the camo shorts sure it works well i don't know it's like a nice like so if you're in the woods someone could just see the title on your hat and not the hat basically is that kind of how it would go well if i'm in the woods i'm Shooting my three lasers at them so that by the time they see this, they're already exploded into 10,000 pieces.

Speaker 1 I mean, this is the thing we didn't, we didn't say is that you said prey. We didn't get into this.
You said prey. We were getting there.
It's the best

Speaker 1 movie.

Speaker 1 More so than the the og predator i really do i have more fun watching prey i think it's a better piece of art than predator predator is iconic but you know you look at it through the it's such a bad it's this is such a it's such a bad well i don't think necessarily the first the the first in the franchise because it defines the rule is has to be the number one overall however i do think predator is a franchise where that is the case i think it's great there's a lot of stuff in it that works so well it doesn't look old right uh it looks like it could happen today and you know you you get you got guys at their absolute fucking peak in that movie.

Speaker 1 And it's like sets, it like sets the, it's so archetypal with the characters and stuff like that that it makes a lot of sense. Like, okay, people imitated this forever afterwards.

Speaker 1 Prey goes in a totally fucking different direction, but it feels really fresh and interesting and cool. And yeah, it's like a whole different.
I don't know, like with Predator, the whole thing.

Speaker 1 Everyone disagreed with you when you said this. I understand.
I just want to make that clear.

Speaker 1 With Predator, even though Predator is the Predator and the soldiers are the prey, it feels like an inevitability that the

Speaker 1 armed to the teeth muscle guys will figure something out. Sure.
Sure.

Speaker 1 But with prey, it's really inverted and I think a really fun way where you're like, what possible advantages could they eke out in this environment? They don't have fucking grenade launchers.

Speaker 1 You know what I'm saying?

Speaker 1 They know the land more. Of course.
And Arnold is in a territory he doesn't really know. That's absolutely true.
I just think there's no technological cudgel by which they're eking out an advantage.

Speaker 1 It's just so much more bare bones than I think. But that tech doesn't work, you fool.
That's the point of the Predator. One thing I like about Predator, they shoot him a lot.

Speaker 1 They shoot him, but it doesn't work.

Speaker 1 It's the Predator's tech. He has the tech.
The Predator has the tech.

Speaker 4 The third act of Predator has some great traps. I think people forget it's a trap movie.

Speaker 1 It is a trap movie. Which is exactly what Prey does as well.
More so even than Trap. Yeah.

Speaker 4 Yeah, you know what? Is it more of a trap movie than Trap? I guess so in terms of there's not a ton of traps in trap. No, there's like one maybe to a trap.

Speaker 1 I just want to say that you are very, I just still think you're very wrong here. You think I'm fucking stupid.
I mean, I'm not going to say that. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
You've said it.

Speaker 1 Oh, yeah, I have said it before. I'm not going to say it right now.

Speaker 1 I don't think you're stupid. We'll talk about it afterwards.
I think you're a smart man

Speaker 1 that has a very bad take. I have unconventional taste.
You and I agreed on Alien Romulus. We did not like him.
And we're sort of on an island on that, by the way.

Speaker 1 I know a lot of people are like, I didn't love Romulus. I didn't really like it.

Speaker 4 I think it's excruciating it's really really it's it is not only is it a failure artistically it's symbolic of the thing that makes movies bad right now which is the hand-holding yes and the like explicit like narration and uh nothing left to the imagination and all the request and then the the cge and home it's like oh man it's an affront and i know that there's like hey we got the family's permission or whatever like all right yeah great you gave the family a quarter million dollars and they signed off like that does like that doesn't necessarily make me think that it's a, uh, a good thing to do to do this, this simulacrum of an actor's performance, an actual human being's performance with some sort of CG animation.

Speaker 4 It feels grotesque.

Speaker 1 You know what? So I'm on the West Coast because we went to TwitchCon,

Speaker 1 which you need to go to sometime.

Speaker 4 I'll go to TwitchCon. Why not?

Speaker 1 You would have, well, first of all, get in soon because, no, no, no. You need to try it.

Speaker 1 You would.

Speaker 4 Is it falling apart? Is it not long for this world?

Speaker 1 Everything's falling apart. Everything's falling apart, sure.

Speaker 1 But so there was something there that speaks to something. I think you would have like an existential crisis seeing it, maybe, is

Speaker 1 another one.

Speaker 1 Yeah, sure. Right.

Speaker 1 They had a huge booth because painting is big on

Speaker 1 Twitch. One of our friends, Liz, iPaint Burbs, won an award for like, you know, upcoming stream or whatever.
And she was there and it was great. So there's artist support there is really, really cool.

Speaker 1 But there is like a

Speaker 1 Bob Ross VR, this like Sim thing happening. You want to talk about fucking Simulacra? Like,

Speaker 1 we paid the family some money and now some stuff is happening. Like, you think that's fucking cool? Like, you put on the glasses and you're Bob Ross? That's psychotic.
That's really truly strange.

Speaker 1 That's insane. And that's like what all of that shit.
It's like right next to the big booth for the Navy. Wow.
It's a really weird place.

Speaker 4 Yeah, you got to have, you got to have some

Speaker 4 representation of the military industrial complex.

Speaker 1 I wonder how many people signed up for the Navy at TwitchCon.

Speaker 1 Do you think there was a lot of signups?

Speaker 1 I know they had that thing where they were like, you have to shave and can't be a gross fat guy recently. So

Speaker 1 I'm thinking

Speaker 4 really an overlap with a TwitchCon demographic.

Speaker 1 Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Speaker 4 So you are out in SoCal for a spell. We had some food that we'll talk about for the podcast in a bit, but you had some, you were saying you had a delightful bite early on, like earlier today.

Speaker 1 So I did man uh my friends treat me so well when i come out here um i think they think it's funny to watch me enjoy myself they really get a they get a kick out of it look at this rube like living it up in the city of angels like i was out

Speaker 1 like i was out eating with jack black earlier we were having sandwiches and uh

Speaker 1 he would he would he'd have no idea he he

Speaker 4 so mitch just got scared because

Speaker 4 there is the gator the puppet This is the suckoff gator. The suckoff gator that was propped up behind you on the back wall.
It fell down and it scared you.

Speaker 1 It did scare me a little bit. I'm not going to lie.
I mean, like, I looked back and it was a gator face. It was actually scary in many ways.
Well, that's in your DNA.

Speaker 1 That is the.

Speaker 1 We're supposed to be scared of gators.

Speaker 1 We are supposed to be scared of gators.

Speaker 4 I'd hate to see one of those in the wild.

Speaker 1 I'd fucking hate to see a fucking gator in the wild. I'm well.

Speaker 1 Well. I mean, in the right situation, obviously.

Speaker 4 Yeah, sure. In a certain situation.

Speaker 1 We lock eyes across the bar and before you know it, you know, he's got got me pinned up against the bathroom stall.

Speaker 1 I mean, my hands are wandering, obviously, for want of a

Speaker 1 meaty Gator cock, and, you know, the rest is history.

Speaker 1 You don't have no gators in Tennessee, huh? Not as far as I'm aware.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 1 I just didn't know. All manner of critter.
Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 1 Nutrats. You got those there? No, you're still thinking of the one place you've been besides here.

Speaker 1 I've been to Tennessee.

Speaker 1 I went to Dollywood. You know, I went to Dollywood.
Did you go to Dollywood? I did go to Dollywood. Okay.
That's cool.

Speaker 1 Yeah, my family, we went up to the Smoky Mountains and stayed in the cabin. And my wife took the older girls and our niece to Dollywood.
And I stayed in the cabin with the baby and chilled out.

Speaker 1 And it was a lot of fun. So nice.
I don't do rides. Yeah.
Not do rides. Yeah, why don't you do rides? I do get pretty severe motion sickness, but also

Speaker 1 there's no reason to take the baby to the amusement park in the middle of the summer. Sure.
Yeah, that matters.

Speaker 4 Going off of what I see, it seems like that's not the case.

Speaker 1 A lot of families seem like that's their top priority. Yeah, you're right about that, Nick.

Speaker 1 I find there's a a lot of families doing stuff I would never in a million years do, but I know that's just part of being a dad.

Speaker 1 But what

Speaker 4 you were enjoying some food earlier?

Speaker 1 Yes, we went to Piños, Pino, Pinos, yeah, Pinos, Piño sandwiches, which is very, very good. This is the thing, and I know this is going to sound like I'm just glazing Mitch.

Speaker 1 And believe me, I'd love nothing more. Go on, let me hear what you're going to say.
But I really do, Italian food is like so far down the list for me of cuisines.

Speaker 1 I have, there was something we did on on the stream at one point, which was, I think I said, it's not in my top, and I'm sorry, it's not in my top 25, I think. Yeah.

Speaker 1 And I, I successfully got all the way through 25 cuisines that I preferred to Italian food. That's insane to me.

Speaker 4 A borderline heretical opinion.

Speaker 1 I understand that. And it's just not my favorite thing.

Speaker 1 Top 25 cuisines. I mean, I don't want you to name them.
No, we don't have the time.

Speaker 1 But if you pull up a list of cuisines,

Speaker 1 they're on there. Trust me.
They're on there. Not in your top 25 cuisine.
Genuinely. And it's not, I don't think, I love food.
It's not that I think it's bad food. Yeah.
And I had great meals.

Speaker 1 Piños, that was a great sandwich. We went to Donna's,

Speaker 1 which I thought was, you know, very, very good. I enjoyed the meal there, but it's like, would I rather have like a mid-Thai lettuce wrap or this great tagliatelli or whatever?

Speaker 1 I'd rather have the fucking lettuce. It's just for the flavors I like better.

Speaker 1 Look, I disagree with you. I know you like Italian.

Speaker 4 I also like you not taking the bait on lettuce wrap.

Speaker 1 I will never take the bait.

Speaker 1 Lettuce wrap is retired. Wow, okay.
Look at that. Retired bit.
It's a retired bit.

Speaker 1 Mitch underscore lettuce wrap dot wav is like one of the biggest files I still keep in my Google Drive because I never know.

Speaker 1 We may need it at some point. It may come up.
It's a break in case of emergency. We need the lettuce wrap.

Speaker 1 In case I die, are you saying? Or is it like a. Yeah, for the looping video at your funeral?

Speaker 1 It's you and the birthday boys, the birthday suit guy, but it's lettuce wrap over top instead. Yeah.
I still have that. I have the that suit in my, which was a Disney riff.
Right.

Speaker 1 I have that suit in my garage. You do? Yeah, I do.
I do. I got it.
The big, if you pull into my garage, the big Mitch head is there. I think you've probably seen it, Amelia.

Speaker 1 Do you have any of the letters?

Speaker 1 Yes, I do. I do.

Speaker 1 I have, I think, 37 or something.

Speaker 1 I have like one of the letters. It was on the wall and then it fell off the wall and it's just kind of sitting there.
Wow. That's cool.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. And I have the fish blob head of the old man.

Speaker 1 Awesome. From this, it's all birthday boy stuff.
This doesn't make any sense. Uncultured swine, of course, wouldn't have seen it, but

Speaker 1 you've seen the show. I fucking love it.
Me and Mike talk about it all the time. It's a great fucking show.
I just get you. I love Dog Boner.
Yeah. Where is he today?

Speaker 1 He's dead. Oh, no.

Speaker 1 Yeah, rest in peace. Oh, no, it's fine.
He killed himself. Oh, okay, sure.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 He wanted it. So it's good.

Speaker 1 It's good when that happens. Did one of your employees get a bonus for that?

Speaker 1 Well, obviously, if I get to wet my beak a little bit.

Speaker 1 but no, we just finished. So, in October, we hand over the reins to him.
You guys have been on. We did the stuff with you guys, which is a lot of fun.
Yeah, it's basically Mike Tober for Mike Tober.

Speaker 1 Back from Mike Tober, it's almost over. Mictober's over.

Speaker 4 I mean, this episode's out. It's Mike Tober's definitely over.

Speaker 1 Yeah, yeah. I feel so bad asking you guys to do stuff.

Speaker 1 You would have liked to do Mike Tober. It would have been fun.
Well, listen, we also

Speaker 1 do Far Arch. So, okay.

Speaker 1 That

Speaker 1 to me doesn't seem as appealing.

Speaker 1 That's literally what everybody says. So, yeah.

Speaker 1 But it's sort of the thing where Mike is

Speaker 1 giving a little bit of culture to me because horror is not my favorite genre, or at least not the one that I grew up on in the same way that he did. So he's showing me stuff for the very first time.

Speaker 1 So this year, like Rosemary's Baby,

Speaker 1 fun,

Speaker 1 Suspiria,

Speaker 1 Demons,

Speaker 1 and then there's a couple others. But to your point earlier about, you know, things don't work out, he showed me American movie for the first time.
Oh, yeah, okay.

Speaker 1 Documentary. Unfucking believable movie.
I don't even like documentaries, had never seen it. It's just like, it's such a touching, like real, and absolutely hilarious movie.

Speaker 1 I've watched it several times just in the intervening weeks, just like watching it over and over again, just because those guys are so amazing to be around, but so real and also just like such an expression of like, well, it is what it is.

Speaker 4 Exactly. You know?

Speaker 4 So you're out here in SoCal. Yeah.

Speaker 4 You're in Tennessee. You live in Tennessee.
Yeah. Yeah.
They say Tennessee in

Speaker 4 is Tenne Eaton.

Speaker 1 They do say that.

Speaker 4 Do you have any bites in your neck of the woods?

Speaker 4 Beyond the cookouts of the world.

Speaker 1 Beyond the cookouts of the world, which is a lot of fun. Loads.
You're totally going to go back to Cookout.

Speaker 1 We really.

Speaker 4 Someone's saying we didn't give Cookout a fair shake.

Speaker 4 This was one of the fans at New York Comic-Con. Now, I disagree.
I think we were pretty

Speaker 1 positive on Cookout. It felt thorough to me.

Speaker 4 But I will happily return because I had a lovely meal there. That's right.

Speaker 1 I have a question for you.

Speaker 1 Do you include pizza in with the Italian food?

Speaker 1 I've never really loved, loved. I'll eat it.
Wow. I'll eat it.
But I think something you have said, which I agree with, is I don't know, maybe this is putting words in your mouth.

Speaker 1 I really like when they do like the chicken, bacon, red onion, and it's like barbecue. Like, that's fun.
Yeah, that's a fun way to get a fun way to get it. Thin crackery crust.

Speaker 1 Like, that's fucking fun. I like flatbread.
I don't know.

Speaker 1 I was at Secret Pizza last night.

Speaker 1 That's

Speaker 1 I was there with

Speaker 1 a couple of

Speaker 1 couple former head glum gum employees wait that is that's it's jack black that did that well i thought you said you were out with friends oh

Speaker 1 he would know me if he saw me i'm sure he'd know you you were out with some head glum employees go ahead former head gum employees uh uh casey and kayla we were and we got some secret pizza and uh i there was a uh i need i need to i meant to give this shout out this guy uh came up to me when i was on he said hi i'm drew i'm i live in indonesia he said I'm in LA for just a couple days.

Speaker 1 And he said, I listened to the podcast. I live in Indonesia.

Speaker 1 And he's like, I never thought that I would ever see you. And he said, the way I knew it was you is I walked into the restaurant and I heard you talking about Pizzagate.

Speaker 1 Because I was talking about how secret pizza is. It seems very much like

Speaker 1 comic ping pong. There is something for, as I was telling you guys before, and as you know, I'm a huge fan of the show.
I'm not just a friend. I'm also a listener.
Wow.

Speaker 1 wow, I love the show, and it is so much fun coming to Los Angeles, especially in these neighborhoods, and going past the places that you guys-i mean, particularly Mitch talks about all the time.

Speaker 1 I'm sitting in the car with like uh my friend Luke Taylor, and we're driving around. I'm like, oh, cool, E-Rustic! And he's like, Yeah, it sucks.

Speaker 1 It's just so funny. Everyone's like, The wings at E-Rustic are good.

Speaker 1 I don't know, I know, I know, I know, I know.

Speaker 1 What brought you out here, anyways? What the why are you to go to TwitchCon? But but I only leave

Speaker 1 I thought TwitchCon was a while ago. No, it was just this weekend.
No, he didn't know Miss Israel.

Speaker 4 It was a while ago.

Speaker 1 Yeah, yeah, yeah. Well,

Speaker 1 I just loved it so much. My family said, stay a couple of extra weeks.

Speaker 1 Wait, where are you all? Oh, you were in. Was there a Vegas TwitchCon? Vegas one was last,

Speaker 1 maybe two years ago.

Speaker 1 Yeah, it was two years ago. Wow.

Speaker 1 I thought you were here just recently. Were you not? Are you sick of me? A little bit.

Speaker 1 If I'm here, I'm begging you to come on the show. That is true.
So you know what? Maybe it was you just preparing to come to TwitchCon. Maybe that's what it was.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Speaker 1 We put this on the books in August. Yeah.
Okay. That's what it was.
And I think you just haven't shut the fuck up about it yet.

Speaker 1 Yeah, it's true. It's true.
Mitch has got me dead to rights.

Speaker 1 Every couple of weeks, I'll text Mitch and go, how's it going? And so that is basically his mind.

Speaker 1 I fucking texted you about the Path Titans game. I got nothing from it.
So whatever.

Speaker 4 How do you feel about your Titans this year?

Speaker 1 Well, look, I want them to be bad at this point. Sure.
So that's fine. I think Cam Ward has done some encouraging things.
He's done some very rookie things as well. Right.

Speaker 1 Ultimately, this is the frustration of every bottom-feeding franchise in the league, which is I have no confidence in ownership. Sure.

Speaker 1 And, I mean, but the thing of it is, is like people, it's the second guessing thing of like, well,

Speaker 1 you went for the flashy head coach with the quarterback whisperer

Speaker 1 reputation. Well, that didn't fucking work out.
You went for the defensive coordinator from the defensive powerhouse team. That didn't fucking work out.

Speaker 1 You signed these free agents that were like top of the free agent pool at the positions you so desperately needed. That didn't fucking work out.
It's like, well, they tried. You know, I don't know.

Speaker 1 What are you supposed to do? Like, I feel like we were all excited about it at the time. And, you know, now people are like, well, maybe they should hire Mike McCarthy.

Speaker 1 Just go like, Jesus fucking Christ. Like this, the guy who's like been around, everyone's sick of him like right away.
Like it

Speaker 1 just sucks, you know? So I don't know. The pats look, look, they still got a ways to go, I think, but they look, they look, and you guys were in it for half the game.
It looked like it was.

Speaker 1 And that's all you need when your team needs to be bad. Like, that's literally all you want to see, right? One and a half.

Speaker 1 Yeah, you want to say, like, all right, they got a little pep in the step, but then they fucking fall apart. You go, okay, cool.
You know, draft pick city.

Speaker 1 So Wigger is a he's getting into the Chargers. I've heard about that.
Bolt up. Bolt up.

Speaker 4 Got my bolt-ons.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 Man, I love that. Yeah.
All right. Man, I really love that.
Bolt-ons?

Speaker 1 I really love that shit.

Speaker 1 I love it. Have you, did you watch the game this weekend? No.
But I'm into it. I'm afraid.

Speaker 1 Still pretty good.

Speaker 1 Still not bad.

Speaker 4 And I had some stuff going on Sunday. But yeah, but

Speaker 4 whatever. I get an NFL franchise to follow again.
Why not? I got to do something. Got to fill the hour somehow.
Yeah. You know?

Speaker 1 Well, as you have, you staked out the claim for many years that it's completely indefensible ethically, and you're absolutely right. Yeah.
But whatever.

Speaker 1 I've swung back around because who gives a shit? Fuck it.

Speaker 4 Look at see what else is going on.

Speaker 1 Fuck it.

Speaker 4 It's so far down the list of egregious shit that exists in our world.

Speaker 1 You're right.

Speaker 1 that i'm just like yeah all right this is fine yeah you're right whatever you've kind of destroyed your brain for uh uh entertainment as well sure absolutely that's what this show is true many ways yeah it's true they'll probably study some new thing that we got from podcasting every day in

Speaker 1 15 to 20 years yeah when you when you guys finally you know yeah like preserve your wieners they'll probably want to look at that

Speaker 1 i'm definitely going to take a look

Speaker 1 when he's gone come on when he's gone

Speaker 1 I'm going to take a wad.

Speaker 1 I mean, like,

Speaker 1 I would happily identify your body if they needed someone to identify you. Yeah.
I might take a little look up these cheese there. See what's going on.
Right.

Speaker 1 Starting at the bottom in, the guy's like, no, you should start up here, right? You're like, no, I don't think so.

Speaker 1 Work my way up for the turret. Trust me, Trump.
Trust from the bottom. That's him.

Speaker 4 Can I ask about something you posted from TwitchCom?

Speaker 1 Sure.

Speaker 4 You got yourself an energy drink called the Russian Badger Guacamole Gamer Fart.

Speaker 1 look i don't like any element of this no but you bring it no i chugged it what would what like did it did it taste like guacamole what was the experience it tasted like every other piece of there is it was like it was like i don't know why i think it's like here's what i think so even though we are on twitch stefan and i which by the way do we have that message from stefan yes we do is now the time to queue it up

Speaker 4 That's your show. I mean, I don't know.
What do you think?

Speaker 1 I can fucking flush it. I don't know.
I haven't even heard it. I waited.

Speaker 1 I'm not going to bring him up again after this. Okay, this seems like the time.
Here it is.

Speaker 10 Hey, everyone. Really sorry I couldn't be there for this episode.
I'm actually doing the go off king stream right now as you guys record this. It's true.

Speaker 10 I guess I would be lying if I said a small part of me didn't think that maybe you scheduled it during the stream on purpose to freeze me out. Oh, and please don't say the small part of me is my penis.

Speaker 1 Let's be adults here.

Speaker 10 Whatever.

Speaker 10 The important thing is that you guys have fun with your podcast episode while I'm doing a sponsored stream for a mobile game called like Kingdom of Battles, where in the ad for the game, the gameplay actually looks really fun.

Speaker 10 And you honestly believe Rain Wilson when he says he enjoys playing it. And then you notice the cameo logo in the corner of the ad.

Speaker 10 And when you download the game, it's like instantly clear that the gameplay you saw happens like maybe once every 25 levels during the ascension mechanic.

Speaker 10 Anyway, I'm sure you and JF will have a great time. I think he's really funny.

Speaker 10 And once the episode is out, I'll make sure to check the subreddit and screen grab the meanest post to send to the group chat.

Speaker 10 Oh, and JF told me to sign off this way for some reason. Your brother in pleasure, Stefan.

Speaker 1 Wow.

Speaker 4 That's beautiful. Thanks, Stefan.
That is beautiful. Thank you, my brother.

Speaker 1 We wish you were here, Stefan. Yeah.

Speaker 1 I mean, it's more of the same. You're not really going to.

Speaker 1 From what we just heard, you're saying? Kind of like me.

Speaker 4 I'm proud to call you a brother in pleasure.

Speaker 1 It's just more about you. Welcome to the Brotherhood.
Yeah. All right.

Speaker 1 Brother in Pleasure. I don't know if I love that entirely, but.

Speaker 4 What is the greater pleasure than consuming delicious food?

Speaker 1 It seems a little Hellraisery to me.

Speaker 1 And you don't like Hellraiser? I do like the Uber.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 1 A very Hellraiser Christmas? That's dude.

Speaker 4 Do you need to move the gator? It seems like it's scary.

Speaker 1 It is. It is.
I mean, it is

Speaker 1 right over my shoulder. Oh, sweet.
Do you mind?

Speaker 1 Oh, God. Oh, fuck Jesus.

Speaker 4 It just completely fucked the tableau.

Speaker 1 What a mess. It's falling apart anyway.
The whole fucking studio is falling apart. Everything's falling apart.
You guys want to come record in my studio? I'd love to. Yeah,

Speaker 1 this is your home, isn't it? Yeah. I'll make that commute.
Yeah, let's do it.

Speaker 4 It feels like it could be a fun one-time video.

Speaker 1 You maybe could get him to move to tennessee i think that would be a lot of fun i don't think i could move to tennessee um

Speaker 4 but

Speaker 1 i would like i like i i i'd be down to to go visit the jf homestead the next time you guys do a tour or you stop in we'll do an episode in in my studio didn't didn't i didn't we did we drive by your house when i was there at one point i don't think so we had a rental van didn't we no i think you picked us up in your van

Speaker 1 oh it was your van yeah you gave us a lovely little tour of uh nashville I was tooting y'all around. A lot of fun.
I feel like I've seen a picture of your house. Maybe you've shared a photo.

Speaker 1 I may have showed it.

Speaker 4 You might also be in the old house with a nice driveway.

Speaker 1 Oh, that's maybe.

Speaker 1 But there, you know, driveway update.

Speaker 1 What happens? We're on that new new. Listen,

Speaker 1 we got a long fucking driveway, Mitch. I'll tell you.
Wow. If people...
If people got wind of my driveway the way they know about your stairs, I'd never work in this town again.

Speaker 1 Why?

Speaker 1 Also, do you work in this town? Well, I stop in.

Speaker 1 You don't work in this town.

Speaker 1 Listen, I'm trying.

Speaker 4 You work in entertainment.

Speaker 1 I got some iron in the fire.

Speaker 1 Of course.

Speaker 1 You work in audio.

Speaker 1 I work on video.

Speaker 1 You work in audio and video. I work in audio and video.
Yeah. I thought you were being too generous with saying he works in entertainment.

Speaker 1 Audio and video is

Speaker 1 a good way to define it. Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 1 I felt,

Speaker 1 maybe it was just a nice gesture because you did pick us up. Did you pick us up at the restaurant? Is that what it was? Maybe you picked up at the airport.
I don't remember.

Speaker 1 I think I got you at the hotel, hotel, it was that weird little skinny ass hotel. Oh, right.
And I got you from there, and then we drove around. I was auditioning for Twisted Metal.
That's right.

Speaker 1 We went and stayed at the Zane's condo.

Speaker 4 That was that long ago.

Speaker 1 Oh, my God. That was the first time we saw each other back from COVID.
Yeah, we stayed in the Zachary.

Speaker 1 To save some money, you and I had stayed. There were two bedrooms, the Zane's condo, so we took it and we were like, never again.
be.

Speaker 4 So, yeah, I think people know this, but like a comedy club will oftentimes in a city for touring acts have their own condo property that they own where they can put people up as condo sounds so much nicer than at least that one is than shithole.

Speaker 1 Yeah, it's like a shitty college apartment. They have their own shithole you can stay in.

Speaker 1 It's in a shithole that like 40 and 50-year-old men stay in. Yeah, and you like get in there and you're like, was there, did someone come and clean this?

Speaker 1 Or did someone sleep on these sheets last night? Right. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 yeah it was it was it was hellish we shouldn't i mean it was kind of fun in that way of it was weird i guess but wages made the right move being like i'm not doing that yeah i wouldn't have been able to get an

Speaker 1 ipitzen had stayed in the room before us or something there was some weird shit where someone stayed there yeah yeah but we drove around and we we went on broadway we did yeah it was fun with carl actually broadway was horrible it was actually awful it's like so broadway like the uh the i i because i've been to i think we've already said this before we've been i i've been to you know uh the vegas trip obviously a number of times, been to

Speaker 4 New Orleans. The New Orleans, yeah, the bourbon streets.

Speaker 4 Broadway is the worst one.

Speaker 1 Broadway is the worst one. Yeah.
Yeah. Memphis has Beale Street, which is actually really cool, but it's also very grimy.
Sure. You know, in the same way they all are.
Yeah, sure.

Speaker 1 These like party avenues or whatever. Memphis, I think, I just love Memphis.
I just love going there. I've heard Memphis.
Broadway, I mean, like, I think Broadway is just kind of the smallest, right?

Speaker 1 Isn't it just kind of like the most boring one of the bunch? They're all all small, like they're all just little avenues. But like New Orleans, I think, has a culture that's like more fun to look at.

Speaker 4 Yeah, it's live music. People are fucked up, and I wouldn't want to stay there.
But like, I can, and there's better parts of New Orleans, but it's like, I kind of get the party atmosphere here.

Speaker 1 Broadway feels like you might, someone might beat you up. Yeah, probably, yeah.

Speaker 4 And there's just like a bunch of just staggering bachelorette parties.

Speaker 1 So I liked that part of it. I thought that was fun.
That was a lot of fun.

Speaker 1 From what I understand, I've never visited New York City, but I understand enough about it to know that there was a time period where

Speaker 1 it was very gritty. Yeah.
And then it sort of was, you know, improved for family purposes, I guess, or whatever. But it lost that character.

Speaker 4 Time Square used to be like a bunch of porno theaters, and then they went in there and cleaned it all up. And now there's an M ⁇ M store.

Speaker 1 And now, so it's like a totally different thing, right? I would say that Broadway is sort of doing its own version of that. Where it's getting an MM store?

Speaker 1 They're getting an M ⁇ M store, but not the M ⁇ M you think. No.

Speaker 4 But it's like... That is the kind of guy that have a branded honky tonk.

Speaker 1 A thousand percent. So that's what it is.
It's like there are these like original honky tonks. They fucking stink.

Speaker 1 Like that place we went into and you did, I have very fond memories of you doing the Tommy Want Wingy with the burger on it. To get the burger, to get the grill back open.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 An unbelievable Mitch charisma roll.

Speaker 1 It was a night. It was a good.
It was good for me to see that I still had it.

Speaker 4 They had closed. The kitchen was closed.
Yeah. And you basically begged, borrowed, and stole your way to get me a burger.

Speaker 1 I didn't, I just said, I said, oh, is it closed? And I said, yeah. And I said, oh man, I really want to try that burger because I did want to try the burger.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 And, you know, she's like, well,

Speaker 1 let me see if I can call the chef. He thinks he just tucked himself in.
I said, oh, you can wait.

Speaker 1 He came out with his cap.

Speaker 1 He cooked me a burger. The green Eminem was there.
She was on her bachelorette party. Yeah.
Do you remember that? She flashed us. She did flash us.

Speaker 4 Well, Mitch just did, yell, ladies, show your titties.

Speaker 1 You know what's crazy? When she flashed us, it's two peanuts. I think people don't know that.

Speaker 4 They don't realize that's what she's got under there.

Speaker 1 Which is strange because the yellow MM is the peanut MM. Yeah, but yeah, when she took her

Speaker 1 two flashes, yeah, it was two peanuts.

Speaker 4 And she pulls up her shell.

Speaker 4 So she's like, this is my skin.

Speaker 1 That's her skin. Yeah.
Which goes back to Hellraiser a little bit. Yeah, right, right.
Yeah. And I was like, I'm into it, whatever it is.

Speaker 1 I don't fucking care. I mean, yeah.
No, I remember that being a particularly shitty night. i think that we didn't have a lot of fun i mean right i mean like like i was

Speaker 1 fun i had a good time one of my fondest memories ever yeah i guess it kind of sucked i don't know here here's here's what it was the company was was wonderful yeah of course there were certain like there were that like that was like kind of like a stinky old honky tonk just kind of we went to some restaurant that was up way up an elevator but then but then yeah but then we went to that like it was like what's open

Speaker 1 it's got to be a waffle house or something no waffle houses anywhere nearby it's not like that so we went to this like upscale diner that was like on the top floor of a you know like a high-rise yeah and it was the food sucked and it was super expensive and it was just like this really obnoxious like faux you know upscale client like like vibes that was more like the look too club like a johnny rockets that's up its ass yeah yeah yeah yeah it was it was that was very weird can i say something i i don't want this to be offensive i think every time we've hung out i've never enjoyed myself no i know i've realized i know i know i know i just never it's not never had any fun it's never always kind of fun i don't i don't know what the i don't know what it is i'm trying to figure out what it is we need to do something more like in a more neutral area like there needs to be like what would you you would go to e-resticking your wings nato yeah i i guess so yeah okay nato yeah we could go to nato yeah i mean let's again that's another one let's do it now before we might need to hurry up on this if we're gonna do it you know you ride oh yeah i mean did you get any food while you were here did you did you did you try the sandwich place i've heard i tried the sandwich place i really wanted to go to dan sung saw but i guess it's not going to happen just limited amount of time oh where where is where is that is that uh where is this i have no fucking idea what what about jitlada have you tried any of these places?

Speaker 1 I pitched jitlada because I hear you guys talk about it all the time, and I got the I got the upgrade. Well, dance on song is actually better, okay.

Speaker 1 So I don't know, yeah, but then but then the answer is if you didn't go in, I didn't do it anyways.

Speaker 4 Jelada, I mean, here's the thing with gelada, it's like it, yeah, there's a lot of great Thai food in LA.

Speaker 4 Jit Lada has such charm and it has such character, and it's kind of like, you know, just such a,

Speaker 4 I don't know, I feel like it also informed kind of the Thai food scene in the city and afterwards. Like, it's worth checking out.
That makes sense. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Well, I got, look, I got Del Taco. There you go.
Which is, I mean, we did. Just sold.

Speaker 1 Oh, yeah. Dude, breaking shoes.
Wow. Did you know this or no?

Speaker 4 No, I'm learning this on the podcast.

Speaker 1 This is for me. Del Taco just sold.
Wow. For not a lot.
Not as much as you would think.

Speaker 4 It's kind of, it's not been in

Speaker 4 great shape as a chain.

Speaker 1 Sold to Yadav Enterprises for $115 million. What is like crazy not that much of a time?

Speaker 1 Yeah, you're like, what? That's... I feel like me and Jack Black could get together and sort of pull some investors.
Yeah. I guess you and Jack Black could probably

Speaker 1 come see us doing that.

Speaker 1 He's the face. Jack in the Box sold it steak in Del Taco.
So that maybe isn't the entire

Speaker 1 Del Taco. Just what Jack in the Box steak was.
I think the, whatever the, is it the Dell burger? Is that what it's called?

Speaker 4 The double Dell cheese burger.

Speaker 1 Double Dell cheese, yeah. Good burger.
I think that's better than the Big Mac.

Speaker 1 You do have.

Speaker 4 I like this take.

Speaker 1 It's fucking better.

Speaker 1 No wonder why I don't have fun when we hang out. You have fucking insane opinion.
It's better. Hey, lose the fucking middle bun.
It's cleaner. Yeah, sure.

Speaker 1 and the meat tastes like some meat yeah it's it's yummy it's got like some texture to it man the big mac is just what i look we love it because we love the the the sauce and the cheese and the meat is an afterthought in the big mac i'm sorry but it is and the dell burger i think really is on its corner right now it's a great burg jack in the box okay so jack in the box sold del taco holdings for under 15 million dollars uh all 600 locations will be uh owned by yadav enterprises which owns uh it's it's a franchise operator.

Speaker 4 So they own

Speaker 4 a bunch of El Pollo locos and a bunch of Denny's. How about that?

Speaker 1 Well, well, well.

Speaker 1 The Segway King is at it again. Unintentionally so.
Let him fucking cook, Mitch.

Speaker 1 I was letting him cook. Let him fucking cook.
The more he cooks, the faster we review. You are out of here.

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Speaker 1 We're all out of the ordinary.

Speaker 2 Wise, you know my cat's Wally Nirma. I love him very much.
You know a thing Wally does now, I told you, is he opens doors. He can open doors now.

Speaker 1 Like a Velociraptor.

Speaker 2 Just like a Velociraptor in a Steven Spielberg movie. He can open doors now.
Yes. But you know what's funny is that he always is opening the doors when I'm in the shower.

Speaker 2 He comes in and he gets up on the sink and he watches me shower. I think he likes the hot mist in the steam of the shower.

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Speaker 2 Do it. Do it for Wally and Irma.

Speaker 4 We're doing the Denny's Good Fortune menu today.

Speaker 1 All right, I want to, I do want to yell at you a little bit. Why is that?

Speaker 1 I said, like, here are some. I know that this comes out after Halloween, but I got to say this: people are in the Halloween spirit for two weeks after Halloween.

Speaker 4 In fact, you think so?

Speaker 1 Almost more so because they're like, I didn't watch enough scary movies during Halloween.

Speaker 4 I feel like they're ripping out that Halloween deck right away and going straight to Christmas. I feel like there's basically no daylights.

Speaker 1 There's a couple gobbles in between those two, by the way.

Speaker 4 Yeah, but I mean, just like as far as like,

Speaker 4 I'm talking retail.

Speaker 1 There's a cornucopia my mom puts up in between Halloween and

Speaker 4 that's fun. Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 1 There's there's there's a market for things.

Speaker 4 But retail-wise, they're not, there's not a lot of Thanksgiving.

Speaker 1 Santa suits are going up.

Speaker 4 They're busting out. Yeah, all the costume stores.

Speaker 1 So much of what you say and do is informed by something your mom did.

Speaker 1 You ever think about that? It's interesting. Well, yes, she's my, I mean, I think all human.
Might as psychological insight.

Speaker 4 Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 1 I don't know. I just think a lot of us have kind of moved on.

Speaker 1 I'll never move on from my mommy. No, no, no, no, no, no.
Mitch, I know.

Speaker 1 You could use a little bit more of your mommy in your life. What do you think of that? Well, she lives in my backyard, so I don't know how much better it could get.
She lives in your backyard. Yeah.

Speaker 1 You can let her into the house if you want.

Speaker 1 Mitch, this is what I'm saying.

Speaker 4 What's the driveway thing?

Speaker 1 I'll talk to you.

Speaker 1 I don't want to realize that. All right, we don't have to get into it right now.

Speaker 1 Look, there,

Speaker 1 okay, sure.

Speaker 1 It goes into Christmas territory, but for the next week or so, people are still in the scary movie mode.

Speaker 4 You think we we should have done a Halloween tie-in because we didn't get to do it while we were doing croc dough burn fast-esque.

Speaker 4 Yes. Got it.

Speaker 1 And next door, there was they have the ice cream.

Speaker 4 I think I just got candy copia.

Speaker 1 I think I did some straw. I think maybe I just need to get myself a scoop of candy copia.
I just got a candy crop.

Speaker 1 I think I got to go get to get a little scoop. You know what you're saying? On Doughboys, if anyone wants a scoop of candy copia.
Wow. Fuck yeah.
Mitch, that's amazing. I've never had it, so.

Speaker 4 It is a good ice cream.

Speaker 1 You're invited as well. I assumed that I would be, but thank you for making it clear.
Yeah, you're invited as well. I appreciate the comment.

Speaker 4 Denny's Good Fortune, unlock your good fortune. This fall, Fortune favors the hungry.
And at Denny's Miracles,

Speaker 4 come with receipts. We're serving up a one-of-a-kind collab inspired by Z.
Zansari's new movie, Good Fortune.

Speaker 4 Get a taste of heaven with Krispy Nuggets, a heavenly burger, and rock the exclusive commemorative t-shirt. Find your booth.
Find your fortune.

Speaker 1 We didn't get the t-shirt.

Speaker 1 We didn't get the t-shirt. I didn't know there was a t-shirt.

Speaker 4 I didn't either. I'm learning from this copy.

Speaker 1 Okay, Amelia, I'm looking at her right now. She's literally wearing six t-shirts on top, one on top of each other.

Speaker 1 What the hell is going on over there?

Speaker 4 Denny's last reviewed with Sean Diston during the pandemic for Rock Around the Clock Dober Fest. Three forks, one tine all around.
Was that in October?

Speaker 1 That was an October. Yeah, that was an October thing.
I remember going to Denny's with my mom because I moved back home and lived with my mom.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 1 Which was a great memory for me, just like you loved the time we went to fucking Nashville together or some shit.

Speaker 1 My great memory was my mom and I living together during COVID. It was a great throwback to when I was a child.
And we, I, man, that was during COVID. Rock around the Clock Dober Fest.

Speaker 4 Throwback to when you were a child in a few ways.

Speaker 4 Getting some sucks there.

Speaker 1 What the fuck are you? Shit, I suck at my mom's.

Speaker 1 A little mommy's milk. No, I wasn't.
No. Okay.
The milk is gone. First of all, I assume.
I don't think the milk is there anymore. Yeah, probably not.

Speaker 1 The mommy's milk runs out pretty quickly, I believe. Yeah, right.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Speaker 1 There was none of that going. Well, I mean, when young Sheldon enters the picture, I guess we don't know.

Speaker 1 What kind of things he's stirring up in her, you know, that instinct.

Speaker 4 So there are two items here.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 4 Good Fortune burger, for those who believe Good Fortune should come with bacon, 100% beef patty, American cheese, applewood smoked bacon, caramelized onions, and ranch dressing served with seasoned fries.

Speaker 4 And then there's also the Budget Angel Chicken Nuggies. Good Fortune never tasted so good.

Speaker 4 All-white meat, boneless chicken bites, lightly breaded and paired with your choice of dipping sauce, served with seasoned fries. Not your typical chicken nugget, but Angel's favorite all the same.

Speaker 4 How do we feel about the word nuggies?

Speaker 1 It seems like so you say tendies.

Speaker 4 I do say tendies, so I guess

Speaker 4 I can't cast Neoshi. Nuggies.

Speaker 1 Yes, you can.

Speaker 4 Yes, you can. I feel like Nuggies is a little like Nuggs, I feel like, is the move.

Speaker 1 Nuggies seems like it's from Aziz. It seems like something Aziz would say in this.

Speaker 4 Maybe it's in the movie.

Speaker 1 We should say

Speaker 1 that he told us about this man. Yes, our buddy Aniz, who was was our best guest for the Fernand Handles episode.
Very excited about it. Yeah, he was.
Yes.

Speaker 4 Yeah, it's a cool, I mean, it's cool that they're doing this tie-in. I love these sorts of tie-ins.
It's an unexpected one.

Speaker 1 Tell a nice movie. The menu tastes like shit.

Speaker 4 Go ahead. I didn't say that.

Speaker 1 Oh, yeah.

Speaker 4 You don't want to review it?

Speaker 1 We got to review it. I'll tell you this.
I liked the burger. I'm going on the record or saying I liked the burger.

Speaker 4 I think this was a very down-the-middle Denny's meal.

Speaker 1 This guy didn't like the burger, it seems like.

Speaker 1 Mitch is in the business. Yeah, that's all right.
I understand it. And you all watching and listening, you know what you're getting from Mitch at this point.
Sure. You know?

Speaker 1 What the fuck is that?

Speaker 1 Can we talk about. You want to be friends with Jack Black? You got to play the game a little bit.

Speaker 4 Can we talk about Tony Yeoman on YouTube? Let's talk about it. So,

Speaker 4 this is a guy you've been showing on at the Go Off King.

Speaker 1 How am I the Sandler and you're the Schneider if you're not a part of the industry? You're right. Maybe I'm the Sandler.
You are not the Sandler. I might be the Sandler.

Speaker 4 He tells Sandler's a family man. That's a little point in your your favor.

Speaker 1 Is that a Sandler? That's kind of his thing. That's pretty good.
Well, it's my version of it.

Speaker 4 So

Speaker 4 Tony Yeoman, you show on the Goof Kings. He tells insane stories.
He told one story I watched. It was about dropping bullets in a McDonald's deep fryer and scalding a co-worker.

Speaker 1 That's correct.

Speaker 4 So he's just like an older guy.

Speaker 1 Yes.

Speaker 4 And he basically sits at his...

Speaker 4 He sits and he's eating a meal and usually drinking like a glass of Everclear or something.

Speaker 1 Which is about the size of like a vase that you have for flowers. Yeah.

Speaker 4 And so he's just getting, he's just stuffing himself and getting, uh, getting hammered or staying at the same level of, you know, non-sobriety and then just telling these insane anecdotes from his life.

Speaker 1 He obviously has a very interesting life and is a very interesting person. Right.
I don't know that I would defend everything he's ever done.

Speaker 1 But for pure content purposes, it's great to sit back and let somebody kind of just shoot their shit. Just riff.

Speaker 1 He's in a kit. so basically on the go-off king stream, we will oftentimes watch videos.
And fast food, of course, as you guys have figured out, is a very accessible topic. 100%.

Speaker 1 For people who love that shit. There's something you can.
It was a business-minded decision when you decided that to be the topic. Yes, yes, yes.
Of course.

Speaker 1 I'm just telling you, I know. It's the truth.

Speaker 1 Maybe it sounds a little bit cynical, but. No, no, no.
We knew that it would sell. No, we knew it would sell.
We knew it would sell. We knew it would sell.
Sell, sell, sell. Yeah, of course.

Speaker 1 You know, if, you know, like, if I'm Sandler and like, if my, if, like, we're the group Sandler, do you know who you are in that

Speaker 1 Tony Yeoman, whoever this fucking guy is? I don't know that Tony really.

Speaker 1 I think it breaks almost the immersion of the metaphor. Tony doesn't really run in the same circles as Sandler.

Speaker 4 Yeah, I don't feel like he would be part of that circle.

Speaker 1 Or achieve it. Right, but that's the problem for me is that I'm explicitly wanting to just get all of your runoff,

Speaker 1 whatever form it takes. All right, fine, fair.
You're not the Tony Yeoman. I'm not the Tony.

Speaker 1 Who's the littlest bitch of the Sandler crew? Great question. The grandma's boy guy?

Speaker 1 Oh, you're talking about the stand-up? Oh, the grandma. Oh, you're saying the grandma boy.

Speaker 4 No, not Nick Swartson. The guy who,

Speaker 4 the actor and the titular grandma.

Speaker 1 Alan Covert? Yeah. Okay, so that's interesting.

Speaker 1 That actually might be the case because he actually, you know, YKS, we talk about Kickstarters. Right.
He's a Kickstarter guy because he writes those

Speaker 1 Christian right-wing children's books.

Speaker 4 Okay, sure, right.

Speaker 1 So there is sort of a line there. Yeah, that kind of lines up with me.
So that would work really well.

Speaker 1 Yeah, and I'm kind of, I guess he's like not in their stuff anymore. So maybe at some point.
He's not in the stuff. Like I'm not in the movies.
Maybe I'm on set, but I'm like not on the movie.

Speaker 1 I'm just kind of around. I'm kind of around.
Yeah. Which at a certain point, that's fine.
That's all I need. Yeah.
You know, I can kind of,

Speaker 1 this is cool. You know, this is neat.
Yeah, yeah. Yeah.
Happy to be here. We're happy.
We're happy to have you. Happy to have you.
What's Tony? What is Tony?

Speaker 4 Yeoman?

Speaker 1 So Tony is a character in a way that all the other fast food guys don't really measure up to. And a lot of them have...

Speaker 1 I hate saying this in your presence. A lot of the guys we watch on the stream for entertainment purposes who indulge in fast food or energy drinks or any of the other kind of stuff.

Speaker 1 have mysteriously stopped doing that.

Speaker 1 Weird. Over the years.
Just abruptly at a certain point, just disappeared.

Speaker 4 Very strange.

Speaker 1 What happened? Uh-huh. Yeah, it's interesting.
You know, Joey from Joey's World Tour moved and and seems to no longer be interested in pursuing his content dreams. Right.

Speaker 1 Despite virality.

Speaker 1 Peep this out has sort of had some personal stuff and moved away from the live streams that we love so much.

Speaker 1 Peep this out has kind of had some personal stuff.

Speaker 1 I love that you even know this.

Speaker 1 Look. We know a lot.

Speaker 1 Will we just be one of those tombs one day that you'll look at our YouTube page? I guess sure, of course. It's just a matter of time.
Last upload, you know, and you're like, fuck, man.

Speaker 1 Yeah, they've been gone for a while. Caffeine Man, one of our newer friends recently hung up the mic.

Speaker 1 So

Speaker 1 he's out of the game.

Speaker 1 So it's just, it's really fortunate that Tony was able to come through with us and be such a unique presence on the stream and such a character.

Speaker 1 What's happening to, what do you think is happening to all these influencers?

Speaker 1 I really do think that maybe doing strictly YouTube is actually not something you could do for a living if you are a regular person.

Speaker 1 So that's part of it.

Speaker 1 And also they're slowly killing themselves. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 And anyways, but Tony has more of a direct approach to that, which is

Speaker 1 in sort of his most iconic video to date, he demonstrates his trick, not for the first or last time, of pouring Everclear into this large vase, genuinely just massive, and attempting to light it on fire.

Speaker 1 Which, of course, is, you know, Everclear is very, you know, from your days in the bar business, very high power.

Speaker 1 I once had a small bottle of Everclear that we were drinking, and I was drunk, and I was playing with a lighter because I was also smoking weed like a normal person.

Speaker 1 And I put it too close to the bottle top of the bottle of Everclear, and a flame literally shot out and burned the shit out of my hand. Oh my gosh.

Speaker 1 So I can't imagine taking

Speaker 1 it. It was an empty bottle, too, which just fumed.
So I can't imagine what like an actual baseball. So that's what he does.

Speaker 1 He does that a few times. He like turned the lights off.
And then it's there's some kind of

Speaker 1 physicists, all of the

Speaker 1 attractive female physicists

Speaker 1 married to the people who listen to the show. will be able to explain what the effect is.
But it's something where the fire, the flame, it goes into

Speaker 1 where the fuel is, it's sucked into where the fuel is.

Speaker 4 That's it, Mitch.

Speaker 1 Like into the vase. It goes into the bottle of Everclear.
Yeah. And then is essentially like shooting out like a rocket.
Wow.

Speaker 1 I think because doesn't fire go towards oxygen? Right.

Speaker 1 And then it eats all the oxygen in the bottle. That's why it would explain why.

Speaker 1 For some reason or another, Yeah, it's sucked in. It eats all the oxygen in the mall.
And it shoots it back out. And it shoots back out and it sprays all over his room.
His table is burning.

Speaker 1 It's like hitting on the sides. And he's like, oh, damn, damn, damn, damn, damn.
And he's like patting it out and stuff like that. And he goes, all right, well, anyways.

Speaker 1 And then he starts eating his food. It's one of the most insane things you could ever see.
It's truly.

Speaker 1 And his wife, who is always off camera, like either in the same room or in the other room, is like, you got to stop playing with that ever clean.

Speaker 1 And she's totally non-plus, just like in her own environment.

Speaker 1 he's done it several times. Yes,

Speaker 1 it's his thing. It's his thing he loves to do.
Look, Tony Yo Man Everclear. I'll look it up.
Check it out. Isn't Everclear illegal in a lot of places now because it's so alcoholic?

Speaker 1 I thought that they stopped selling it at least like at the 95 proof level, but perhaps not. But still in the market.
Are you a fan of the band Everclear?

Speaker 1 Um, we really don't know what it's like. That guy? No,

Speaker 1 that's Ever.

Speaker 1 That's Everlasting. Everlast, though.
That's Whitey Ford. That's the one song.
To eat fast food.

Speaker 1 That's there. Do you want it?

Speaker 1 That's.

Speaker 1 And what do you mean, do we want it? Do you want it for a seg?

Speaker 4 Yeah, I'll take it. I'll use it.

Speaker 1 I'll back it up.

Speaker 1 Whitey Ford sings the blues. That's Everlast.
That's that's that.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 1 I'll take your word for it. And then Ever Clear sings

Speaker 1 Ever Clear sings. Father of mine.
I mean, where have you been? Yeah, of course. My daddy gave me a name.
Right? Isn't that him? And he walked away.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I actually, I think I got that album because as a kid, I signed up for what was the male Columbia House. One of one of the things.

Speaker 4 Yeah, there were ones like that, where it was basically like a thing where

Speaker 4 my alpha brother Nate Weiger actually got great at this, where it's like you would get a

Speaker 4 certain allocation for a discount rate. Like it would be like you get 10 CDs for like one penny.

Speaker 1 And then after that, you would automatically be subscribed to a thing that would send you like a CDs they picked you know what they were pick but they were like over markup they were like twice the price and so it was a scam but if you canceled at the right time you just got yourself a haul of CDs yes which my brother was able to do I did that I can remember because I didn't know what was what I remember selecting hard rock like a fucking idiot and then a John Cougar melon camp CD showed up like what the fuck is this shit I had no idea what it was Wow but it was worth it because I got a Britney Spears poster that I put in my room.

Speaker 1 Hey, there you go. Hey, all right.
Yeah, really cool. Jack off to that.
I I was jacking off to that shit. Pretty cool.
No doubt about it. No doubt about it.

Speaker 1 I'm surprised you didn't get a cease and desist from the Spears estate.

Speaker 1 Take down the fucking poster.

Speaker 1 We'll still do it.

Speaker 1 But Tony has a very interesting

Speaker 1 milieu.

Speaker 1 He's in his kitchen. Right.
It's a humble home, but he does manage to have... two full-size refrigerators and then also a third like chest fridge that is humming like all the time.

Speaker 1 For what purpose, I can't divine. He's also watching a TV off in this corner, which you can see in the reflection of something that's hung on the wall behind him.

Speaker 1 And one of our favorite videos that he's done to date is he has had a drunken open-robe conversation with his Samsung AI fridge, constantly trying to get it to say anything of interest and absolutely not getting there until the final pronouncement of, like, you need some dick, don't you?

Speaker 1 to his fridge. Pretty good.
It's pretty good. And how did you find this man?

Speaker 1 So we just, we make an active effort to find new people to watch. And he, I mean, the gods of the algorithm blessed us.
And

Speaker 1 not, it's probably, it has nothing to do with us, but I did see the other day he, somebody had, like, screenshotted his, like, Rocket Everclear video, and it had gone somewhat viral on TikTok.

Speaker 1 So I was really proud to see that for him. Yeah.
I love that. Good for Tony.

Speaker 1 I'm sad to hear about some of these other guys because that's, I followed him through you, and it did ruin my algorithm. And I like it, but

Speaker 1 you can't really enjoy like any for you videos, I guess, anymore. I would fucking love to see your for you page.
On, on, on, on what, on YouTube or on,

Speaker 1 well, maybe not YouTube. On TikTok or Instagram, I would go fucking bananas to see yours.
All right, let's see here. I'm going to look.
I'm going to see if I can share it.

Speaker 1 Okay.

Speaker 1 Dave Chappelle talking about Andy Kaufman. There's no, well, you got a Dave Chappelle clip on Instagram? No, this is on YouTube.
You want me to look at... Yeah, YouTube is shit.
YouTube is shit.

Speaker 1 All right, you want me to look at Instagram? You guys, you guys, YouTube's YouTube's shit.

Speaker 1 Don't give me something.

Speaker 1 Oh, you're asking. I don't.
Yeah, no, I don't. Amelia is on the outs with me because we had never met and she was getting the food from the street there.

Speaker 1 And I walked up to her with my hands out and said, can I help? And she looked at me like I was going to attack her, which I now understand. Well, I didn't see, I was getting the food, and then

Speaker 1 I

Speaker 1 turned around and then I just see a man walking towards me who I don't recognize

Speaker 1 like this.

Speaker 1 And I did it. And then it took me a second.
I was like, oh, oh, that's Jed. That's our guest.
I haven't seen you in person before.

Speaker 1 Nice to meet you. I get why that's a freak movie.
Yeah, I totally get that. I understand that.
But I wanted to help.

Speaker 1 It's weird to say, hey, Amelia, I'm Jesse Farrar. I'm approaching you now.

Speaker 4 Okay, one of the things.

Speaker 4 At one time when I was, this was in a, when I was in college and two, I saw two guys, two of my friends outside a movie theater. And so I went up behind them and I started going,

Speaker 4 like I was attacking them.

Speaker 1 And they both were like, oh, fuck it.

Speaker 1 It's like, oh, yeah, wait.

Speaker 4 That bit was, from their perspective, a man is coming up to kill them.

Speaker 1 Right.

Speaker 4 Makes sense. Yeah, but not a good bit.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 Poorly thought out. Yeah, you can see how you got there.
But okay, yeah.

Speaker 1 This will be a riot. This is going to be fun.
I love it. Because I'm me and I know that.

Speaker 1 All right. So can I tell you what?

Speaker 1 On my For You page, one of the things that came up is good. Okay.
What is it? It's the Golden Girls with Modern Hairstyles.

Speaker 4 That's pretty good.

Speaker 1 And it's like a Rue.

Speaker 1 Oh, Rue's looking good as well. She's actually a bad.
She had those luscious locks. That's what I'm saying.
Damn.

Speaker 4 Also, she's like looking in a mirror.

Speaker 1 Jamie, you horny southern bell.

Speaker 1 Is she younger in this picture? I can't tell. Or is it just a hairstyle? AI picture.

Speaker 4 They probably de-age with some AI.

Speaker 1 I think the purpose of the post is to show that younger, more modern hairstyles de-age people or change your perspective of age.

Speaker 1 That makes sense. The purpose is to get Mitch's cockhard.

Speaker 1 That's the purpose of mission impossible.

Speaker 1 You know what? Betty White looks pretty good too with the modern shit.

Speaker 4 That does look like there's some de-aging going on if I'm looking at it facially. But yeah,

Speaker 4 she goes from like the Betty White hair to like more of a, I guess, is that like a Bob colour?

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 Yeah. This one's pretty good.
Ma. Ma kind of just looks.

Speaker 4 Ma looks very similar. I mean, I guess it's de-perm.

Speaker 1 All duper straightened.

Speaker 1 She went Karen mode.

Speaker 4 Yeah, Estelle Getty.

Speaker 4 She does look a little Karen adjacent.

Speaker 1 I like that the first comment is just fire.

Speaker 1 Someone took the time to just comment fire. That's about as good as it gets for comments.

Speaker 1 That's true. That is true.
What else do you want?

Speaker 4 Stelgetti kind of always been fire. She's a fire brand on that show.

Speaker 1 Yeah. And a Spitfire as well.

Speaker 4 You know what? Spitfire is the word I was looking for.

Speaker 4 Not a fire brand.

Speaker 1 No, it's not been fire.

Speaker 4 The Good Fortune Burger.

Speaker 1 I don't know why. I might move my fan over.

Speaker 4 Here's the thing. I was not expecting the bacon.
I did not read the

Speaker 4 description in advance.

Speaker 1 I'm not

Speaker 4 bacon. A little surprise bacon.
I'm trying not to eat pork, but like, you know, I was pot committed at that point, so I just went with it.

Speaker 4 I thought this was pretty good. I mean, just like the bacon, caramelized onions, and ranch is an interesting choice.
Throwing the ranch on there.

Speaker 1 I didn't really taste the ranch.

Speaker 4 Yeah, it's pretty subtle. Didn't know that.
Yeah, I could have used it a little bit more, honestly. But I thought it was a solid burger.
The big problem with

Speaker 4 you get like a chain restaurant burger.

Speaker 1 is

Speaker 4 unlike like they tend to be like a little fatter than a fast food burger because they're trying to give you a little bit more value, but then they're still cooked well done.

Speaker 4 So you just end up with this big dry hunk of meat. So from an execution standpoint,

Speaker 4 you know, not ideal.

Speaker 1 I maybe was starving, but I, I, I was very much, I was, I, I gobbled up my money.

Speaker 4 You definitely were a hungry guy.

Speaker 1 I was a hungry guy. Again, we could have, is this something that someone you want to take care of?

Speaker 1 Go on, man.

Speaker 1 Mitch, do your thing.

Speaker 4 You're, you know, you're all, you're a guy who's always on your phone.

Speaker 1 I'm doing this. This phone is for research.
This is research phone. Stephanie is streaming right now.
I have to make sure he's not embarrassing himself. Stephan, if Stefan was here,

Speaker 1 he wouldn't have pulled shit like this. What do you have, Nick?

Speaker 4 I think he might have.

Speaker 1 I feel like you guys don't know him that well.

Speaker 1 He's a joy to talk to on that text chain. Shut the fuck up.
Look, he's

Speaker 1 playing baby steps.

Speaker 4 Oh, how about that? Look at that.

Speaker 1 He's playing baby steps, yeah. I would like to see, please.
You want to see? Yeah, you can see. He's playing baby steps.
You know about this? Oh, no. Oh, no.
No, I don't. You know what?

Speaker 1 What's come up in my algorithm on YouTube a lot is there's like a shooting game. I bet you one of you guys will know about it.

Speaker 1 And there's a bunch of guys with like with guns and then you're an object and you just try to hide. Oh, it's called Nick Weiger Simulator.

Speaker 4 No, I've seen this.

Speaker 1 When it whistles, it's like

Speaker 1 it does that. I did play it.
Oh. It's okay, baby.

Speaker 1 Oh, it's okay.

Speaker 1 That's how I get her attention in the house by whistle. She usually comes running.
Wow. I forget what what it's called, but I have played that.
And that's also a mode in other games, too. Like, it's

Speaker 1 a mode. Would you say?

Speaker 1 Is that the best whistle? Or do you think?

Speaker 4 I kind of think of that one more.

Speaker 1 I feel like it depends on what you're doing. That feels like a cat call, I feel like.

Speaker 1 Oh, it is for sure. And then the other one could just be like a little like, hey, whistle.

Speaker 4 I like the, I mean, I do like the

Speaker 4 coach whistle.

Speaker 4 You could put the both of the Phil Jackson.

Speaker 1 Sorry.

Speaker 4 You put, you put, yeah, you put your, like, I can't do it. But you put your pinkies in the sides of your mouth and just

Speaker 1 like the fucking blow.

Speaker 1 I mean, they usually do the

Speaker 1 again. Yeah.

Speaker 4 Or just one heart tweet.

Speaker 1 I mean, now that I'm thinking about whistles, there really is only

Speaker 1 and.

Speaker 4 Well, are we extending it to train whistles? Because then you got the, all right,

Speaker 1 settle down.

Speaker 1 Oh, that doesn't really. I don't know.

Speaker 1 Well, there's a teapot whistle as well.

Speaker 4 Oh, teapot's pretty good.

Speaker 1 And it's also, and that also kind of turns into an awuga in some ways, doesn't it?

Speaker 4 It's a little awuga adjacent. Yeah.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Speaker 1 I couldn't do the awuga whistle.

Speaker 1 I mean, that's, you have to do it. I think it's really cool when, like, a pot gets too hot on the stove and it looks like it hurts it.
When it's like anthropomorphized. Yeah.
It's like, oh,

Speaker 1 oh, I'm going to blow. That is fun.
That's like really fun.

Speaker 4 Kind of gets red and its face gets red.

Speaker 1 Yeah, it gets deformed and it's like so big. You're like, I got to take that shit off the fucking table.
I like that, dude. That's fun.
And it is, I mean, you know what? I do. I'm a simple man.

Speaker 1 I do like the sound of a teapot whistle. Yeah, that's really fun.
That's just one of those things, man. It's just one of those things.
It is. It's like being afraid of crocs.

Speaker 1 Like it's like coated into our DNA. I'm surprised that you just haven't seen crocs.
I've seen many being in New Orleans, but I'm just surprised.

Speaker 4 You mean gators? It's a dice crocodiles, right?

Speaker 1 Gators. Crocs are scary.
Crocs are scary.

Speaker 4 Crocs are scary.

Speaker 1 But wait, is there no other whistles? Is that it?

Speaker 4 I'm trying to think of other whistles.

Speaker 1 I actually feel like there are. You can make up whatever whistle you want.

Speaker 1 So true. Oh, how about the slide whistle, though? Oh.

Speaker 4 Yeah. Whoa, that was pretty good.
That was amazing.

Speaker 1 Good song.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 That one?

Speaker 4 God, how annoying is this going to be to listen to?

Speaker 1 No more than any other episode.

Speaker 1 Maybe it's going to be enjoyable. People can see it.
See that

Speaker 1 I can whistle. You are a hell of a whistler.
I am a pretty good whistler. Oh.
Davy Crockett.

Speaker 1 How do you do that one? Or wait, no. It's Andy Griffith.
Andy Griffith. Davy Crockett.
Oh. Yeah, that's all.
That one. That's a fucking.

Speaker 1 Yeah, that is a good whistle.

Speaker 4 Also, there's the Scorpion's Winds of Change.

Speaker 1 Is that a whistle? Yeah, it's a whistle. I know what you're doing.

Speaker 1 Yeah. That one? Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 1 That one, yeah.

Speaker 1 Okay, I'm not a.

Speaker 1 I just got the Cougar Melon Camp one, and then I fucking, I stopped.

Speaker 4 Anya Kaniskaya,

Speaker 4 I guess still of Headgum, although she lives in upstate New York. The Wire Queen.
The Wire Queen, one of like, I think, three people who still works here.

Speaker 4 But she is a big Scorpions fan, and that was partly from

Speaker 4 growing up in Russia, I guess. That was a,

Speaker 4 that they were, that the band had more of a presence there.

Speaker 1 I wonder if that was. And that's, yeah.
I mean, that is, I mean, it goes on the list for classic whistles. Yeah.
It goes on the list.

Speaker 4 It goes on the list for classic whistles.

Speaker 1 I'm just wondering if we're missing any classic whistles. You know, I know Amelia is something of a Scorpion fan as well.
That's true. My dad is a Scorpion.
Scorpio. And Scorpion.

Speaker 4 So he's a Scorpio, too.

Speaker 1 Yeah, that's why he's... That's where it comes from.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 So it's less weird now.

Speaker 1 Did you know that context? He's not into astrology at all.

Speaker 4 But it's a little bit less of an A to C. I get a dragon.
So wait, what about the shifts done whistle?

Speaker 1 Oh.

Speaker 1 Like Fred Flintstone? Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's really good.

Speaker 1 I made Jemmy so mad she left. He's done, yeah.
She showed you her asshole and then she got on the ground. She did show us her asshole earlier while she was.
She's showing that awful lot today.

Speaker 1 It's true. Damn, Damn, great.
I'm proud of it. Yeah.
Yeah. She's feeling good.

Speaker 4 I'm a regular Blanche from the Golden Girls.

Speaker 1 You don't have to answer this, or if you do answer it, you can cut it out. I just have to know because, you know, I feel like we're friends.
Yeah. We're friends.

Speaker 1 Do you guys, and you guys have been on tour a bunch? I guess so. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Did you ever do the thing as like a joke where you show the other guy your asshole or balls?

Speaker 4 No, I've never done that.

Speaker 1 You don't do, you don't like.

Speaker 4 I wasn't like it.

Speaker 1 Like even in my. The closest I came was at showing Wags a pic of my hog.

Speaker 4 You did, you didn't show me your actual hog.

Speaker 1 No, I didn't, but that's the closest I ever came. Yeah, yeah, wait, what?

Speaker 1 That's interesting. You were scrolling through your photos, and you're like, that's what it was.
That kind of thing was I think, no, I think we talked about this.

Speaker 1 I think it was when we did the power hour. I was like, you want to see my hog? This is such a power hour.
And that sounds right.

Speaker 1 Yeah, yeah, I think it was that. And it just didn't happen.
And it just didn't happen. So you've like staged with Gabris being like, let's all show pictures of each other's hogs.

Speaker 1 I mean, yeah, I think that is kind of the, I think that's what it was. Yeah.

Speaker 1 So you've never like walked, like you take a shower, you walk out, hey man, sorry, I forgot my towel, and you just have your balls out and he has to look at it.

Speaker 4 No, I'm not like that. That is more of a Gabris bit.

Speaker 1 Okay. I feel like it's fucking funny.
But yeah.

Speaker 1 Gabris hasn't done that much.

Speaker 4 He hasn't, but I'm just saying, like, if he did that, that would be more in character. You and I, I think, are a little bit too, too much of a, of prudes.
Yeah. At least beyond verbal.

Speaker 1 Like, I understand the balls and penis stuff, obviously. But an asshole is like...

Speaker 1 I mean, we all got it. It's like, it's got them.
There's like no difference. Yeah, it's kind of fun.
So you think on tour, like, Wager's going to come out of the kitchen.

Speaker 1 I'm gonna have my asshole open and Wager's gonna be like, oh, dude, I'm gonna be like, I got you.

Speaker 1 That's fucking funny.

Speaker 4 You're gonna see my asshole.

Speaker 1 Just a few days ago, we all saw your ass, Mitch.

Speaker 1 That is true.

Speaker 1 I mean, but no, it's behind the paywall.

Speaker 4 Side cheek is very different than hole.

Speaker 1 Yeah. I don't think, just seeing an ass is like not funny.

Speaker 4 I think just seeing a butt is pretty funny.

Speaker 1 I think seeing a butt is funny.

Speaker 1 You have to see the asshole. I don't think seeing a cheek is funny.

Speaker 1 I want to see full hole no it takes otherwise i'm not cracking a smile when randy moss did that disgraceful despicable act and we and joe buck had to witness it oh yeah oh my god he fake mooned you know i mean that's that's fucking insane to do now you show somebody your asshole now we got something yeah that's pretty fun that's fucking hilarious okay

Speaker 1 comes out of there that's funny he won he won me over yeah yeah doo doo does come out of there right

Speaker 1 you know It's not right. No, I don't want him to see my...
The asshole seems personal. I don't want you to see my asshole.
You haven't even seen it, bitch. You don't know.

Speaker 1 Yeah, well, I haven't seen it, and I'm not going to let him see it before me. Somebody's seen it.
Your mom's seen it. You're up to it.
Yeah, you've never tried to see your own? I've done it.

Speaker 1 Deus, close the curtain.

Speaker 1 I don't want to hear that. I don't want to hear any stories about how you look at yourself.
Who is the full list of people on earth who have seen your asshole?

Speaker 4 The full list of people.

Speaker 1 Wally and Irma have probably seen my asshole. Sure.
Why? You're spreading it in front of your cats?

Speaker 1 So there's some sort of test to see

Speaker 1 The weird answers on that. Oh, I just don't know how it happened.

Speaker 4 Yeah, I mean, like, it's, it's, you know, I feel like that's the sort of thing, unless you're

Speaker 4 outside of sexual partners and like medical professionals. There's not a lot of occasions unless you're showing it off.

Speaker 1 Sexual partners are an asshole. I'm not seeing my asshole.
But I'm just, I'm just a lot of people.

Speaker 4 I'm talking about situations where it might be in, like, it might could happen incidentally versus like you having to be intentional. Like, I'm going to show you my asshole.
You know what I mean?

Speaker 4 So it just depends on what you're up to.

Speaker 1 Your mom has seen your asshole.

Speaker 4 She's Yeah, that's what I was saying.

Speaker 4 Parents, absolutely.

Speaker 1 She saw my baby asshole, yes. Right.
And it's basically the same as it was then.

Speaker 4 I hate to tell you.

Speaker 1 It's grown. No more hair.

Speaker 1 It's grown. It's definitely grown.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 Oh, Mitch, you've gotten so big.

Speaker 1 That's an impression of my mom seeing my asshole. Oh,

Speaker 1 that was also Sandler.

Speaker 4 Have you done that, that sort of tomfoolery show

Speaker 4 or been around guys who are doing that sort of thing?

Speaker 1 It's fucking fun. Okay, okay.

Speaker 1 That's a good idea. Rebukely, DB regularly sends pictures like this.
So it's not, no. It's not him necessarily.

Speaker 1 DB will send pictures of an old guy's ball.

Speaker 1 An old guy's balls or cock or an old guy taking a picture of himself and his balls and cock and there's some shit in the toilet behind him for whatever reason. It's a lot of fun.
But yeah,

Speaker 1 do me and my friends sometimes do a thing where we take a picture of ourselves, but then like way off in the background, you can see our ass like positioned in the mirror just so. That's really funny.

Speaker 1 I've done that.

Speaker 4 That's a good trick.

Speaker 1 I've done a thing before where I was like, I showed our friends, like, I was like, check it out. I just got this new drone.
I'm going to take a picture of my backyard. You can see what it looks like.

Speaker 1 And then I let it do the thing. You know, you push a button, it goes like up and then back down.
And I just, the whole time, I had my ass out. I just, that's funny.
It's pretty fun.

Speaker 1 You know, it just comes in, it looks at my ass.

Speaker 4 Everyone can enjoy that.

Speaker 1 That's fun. It's my ass.

Speaker 4 Yeah, why not?

Speaker 1 I'm married. I have three kids.
Yeah. Who fucking cares about you? When I was younger, I used to do that a little bit more.
Yeah, and I'm kind of like the young you.

Speaker 1 Jesus Christ.

Speaker 1 I remember like to my guy friends, I would, I would, I mean, I'm not going to say this. You can say this.
I would draw a smiley face on my hog, and then I would show them. I would be

Speaker 1 take a look.

Speaker 4 That's pretty good.

Speaker 1 That's funny.

Speaker 4 So you get yourself like a jeweler's loop.

Speaker 1 He calls the guy with pencil. He calls the guy in who does the name on grain of rice.

Speaker 1 Things have gotten better. Things have gotten better?

Speaker 4 Things have gotten better. What do you mean things have gotten better?

Speaker 1 Things have gotten better down there. It's better.
All right.

Speaker 4 Here's the thing about the.

Speaker 1 You just want to lead it back to me.

Speaker 1 I don't show my asshole off. I'm not a weirdo like you.
You're a weird guy. Here's the thing.
I'm getting in touch with my ass. It doesn't matter to me.
Here's the thing about the nuts.

Speaker 1 And also, I don't like how quickly the day is quickly ass. You've never looked at it in a mirror before.
I remember once. Doesn't explore your body? Yeah, I think that's a very common thing to do.

Speaker 1 I think it's like every inch of my body. Yeah, same.

Speaker 1 It's going to be there for a while, so you might as well get a knife. No, I mean, I have to.

Speaker 4 I have a.

Speaker 4 I, I remember when I was a kid, uh, that is probably like three years old, and I wanted to see what it looked like when P came out of my wiener. Of course.

Speaker 4 So I got a hand mirror and I held it directly in front of my dick. Yeah.

Speaker 4 And then I just watched P, I think my mom was there too, and I just watched P like ricochet off of the mirrors directly back onto me.

Speaker 1 I love that. I love that your mom's just like, let's watch him, let's watch him do this.
No, I think she didn't know what I was up to and was like, oh, yeah what dick you know the whole thing

Speaker 1 fetish was born and that's

Speaker 1 the headcount mirrors have looked a little wet lately

Speaker 1 that's a really good example of of kid intelligence yes right like i i broke my arm one time and i remember it was basically on purpose like i we had a you know an old couch and i stick my arm like in the

Speaker 1 like i mean i don't want to say it's the asshole of the kid we just talked about assholes for sure sure, but the crack of the couch. Yeah.
And then I was like, huh.

Speaker 1 And I just rolled off the couch and snapped my arm in two. And I was like, well, okay, that makes sense.
Yeah. That seems particularly dumb to me.
I don't know. It's just something you do.

Speaker 1 Everybody does it.

Speaker 4 I thought the chicken nuggies were.

Speaker 1 We're not.

Speaker 4 Like, there's nothing distinct about these, right? These are just like, these are like the standard nuggies.

Speaker 1 Were they bad? No. They were bad.
They were fine. I think one of mine was maybe undercooked.
Yes. Was the first bite of mine full of gristle? Yes.

Speaker 1 Has that ever happened happened to me with a nugget before? Not that I can recall. Yeah.
And my kids, I have kids, so I've eaten like a lot of shitty nuggets. Like, right, yeah.

Speaker 1 Even the fucking dino nuggets are like not that rough. Yeah.
So I don't know what happened.

Speaker 1 These are a bit between tender and nugget, I feel like. They're a little, uh, they're a little colorful.
A Mike Mitchell story.

Speaker 1 Tender. A tender and nugget.
Yeah. Between tender and nugget.
Between tender and nugget. I, you know, I agree with that.
I agree with Mike Mitchell's story. Yeah, it is.

Speaker 4 Your buddy Derek came by, and you had a, he had

Speaker 4 persuaded you to also get a, an Atlantic salmon filet.

Speaker 1 He punched up the bit, which I was sitting there and I was like in crisis. I was talking to Libby and her husband Lewis.
I was talking to Derek. We were all sitting around.

Speaker 1 I said, guys, this show could be huge for me. I got to order something funny.
And I was like, obviously,

Speaker 1 I want the seasonal chocolate cinnamon shake. But that's not funny.
Yeah. Moons Over My Hammy is funny.
Did you get the chocolate shake? No, I didn't.

Speaker 1 Moons Over My Hammy is funny, but it's fucking gross.

Speaker 4 Which one of the shake?

Speaker 1 i wanted you wanted the shake too i mean it sounds it's a seasonal chocolate shake sounds good but they also uber eats the shake no no like don't do that they also had the little maple and like maple injected donut hole thing yeah sure but it's like you know those are going to be good so who cares who gives a shit so get the fucking shitty ass uh the skinny menu salmon shit from the fucking truck stop restaurant well derek was very funny i was hoping that he'd tag in at some point here okay no he left he left before we started recording.

Speaker 1 Smart man.

Speaker 1 I was hoping he'd tag. I would.
You hoping he was tagging out. And I would get out.
Yeah, I was hoping he would tag you, like tag you out and come in. I was like kind of what I was saying.

Speaker 1 Like a Marvel vs. Capcom thing.
Spider-Man goes out, Captain America comes in. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Speaker 1 Wouldn't that be nice? That would have been cool. But I'm Spider-Man.

Speaker 1 Sure, you can be Spider-Man. But again, it's on that level.

Speaker 1 It's on our level again.

Speaker 1 It's on what's going on. Who do you think you are?

Speaker 1 When it comes to that? Yeah. Hmm.

Speaker 1 So it's on Big Justice's mom's level and what superhero? Superheroes, yeah. What superhero are you? I think I could be Thor.
Thor is.

Speaker 4 Thor is pretty.

Speaker 1 I was up there.

Speaker 1 If it's on Big Justice's mom's level of fame, Thor is like Avengers. Thor? That's wild, bro.
If it's on Big Justice's mom's level of fame.

Speaker 1 He's like one of the, he's one of the

Speaker 1 Spider-Man.

Speaker 1 You're giving him Spider-Man?

Speaker 4 Oh, so you're saying we're comparing it relative to JF here. Yes.

Speaker 4 Yeah, I think he could be Thor. Thank you.
Yeah. I mean, like, I'm just thinking, like, if that's if that's what we're saying.

Speaker 1 I know you have to work with him after this, but you also have to live with yourself.

Speaker 1 Can you be honest and say he's not Thor? He's not Thor, obviously.

Speaker 4 Thor is up there. Thor is one of the big ones.
Thor's like the main guy. Yeah.
But I mean, then again, in all fairness,

Speaker 4 I guess if we're talking about the MCU, it's its own thing, but then so is Spider-Man.

Speaker 1 Is Big John? So is his mom more famous than Doughboys, I guess? Yeah, I think so. Clearly.

Speaker 4 Why wouldn't she be?

Speaker 4 They have a much larger social media problem. They have a strong penetration.

Speaker 1 But social media is fucking horseshit, and you know that.

Speaker 4 Yeah, no, it's true.

Speaker 4 I mean, and some of those views are inflated, but I think just enough people are aware of the Costco guys that they're more likely to look at the mom and be like, oh, yeah, it's the mom for the Costco guys versus look at Mitch and be like, oh, yeah, he's one of the doughboys.

Speaker 4 You know, they might recognize you from Lover or Tristan Metal or something.

Speaker 1 Brizzler seems burned out lately, too, by the way.

Speaker 1 I think he's been burning the candle. I think he's, you know what I'm saying? That is such a funny thing to say about an eight-year-old child.

Speaker 4 Yeah, it's a tough thing to.

Speaker 1 I'm not saying, I'm saying, I'm saying he seems, that's, I'm being honest.

Speaker 4 He's kind of burning the midnight oil, kind of burning the candle at both ends.

Speaker 4 They're in the content mindset

Speaker 4 without really the ability to give consent as a, as an eight-year-old.

Speaker 1 All right, this is what I'm saying. When I was at San Diego Comic-Con, people were playing the new Mario Kart against Rizzler.
Yeah. People were just coming in and out.

Speaker 1 And Sean Disson was like, you should do it. And I was like, that would be fun.
I was like, I almost feel sad for this boy. Yeah.

Speaker 4 I mean, it seems like he's enjoying it, but also like, what a difficult way to grow up. Yeah.
You know, we'll see. Yeah, hopefully, everything turns out all right.

Speaker 1 He's like on a Hackman trajectory, you were saying what

Speaker 1 Gene Hackman? Yeah, that's what you said earlier. It's gonna end up like Gene Hackman, that's what he said.

Speaker 1 Why is he gonna end up like Gene Hackman? I don't know, man. Is he one of your friends?

Speaker 4 Decades-long career in acting in film and television, right? And then, you know, but then a grizzly end. Then the Grizzly End, yeah.
Is that what you're doing at the age of like 93?

Speaker 1 That's what you were saying. Is that what you meant? Is that what you were thinking?

Speaker 4 Should have a rizzler in 90 years

Speaker 1 i mean i hope rizzler lives to 90.

Speaker 4 i would they'd be very happy wow could rizzler live to 2100

Speaker 1 he can right he he could in fact i think the actuarial tables is a decent shot especially as life lifespans grow if i'm just thinking of like the new year's ball coming down on the year 2100 and old rizzler doing like his thing holy shit to the crowd oh my god old rizzler you know what i mean like and he will be old and he will be doing that yeah And Ryan Seacrest is there looking exactly the same, of course.

Speaker 1 You still got it.

Speaker 4 Let's get some. Wait, what did you think of the Atlantic salmon?

Speaker 1 This fucking dog shit. Yeah, it looks real bad.
It was, I truly, I don't think I've ever had a worse piece of fish. Is that wrong? You are correct.
Look, I always gamble on fish. Yeah.

Speaker 1 I had to spit this out. Oh, my God.
I've never seen Amelia spit out fish. Yeah.
Well, first of all, she came over and grabbed the fish

Speaker 1 by her hand. Like a burger.
Like a burger. Like a bear in a stream, is how she did it.
She swiped at it. And then she took a big, huge bite out of it.
And then

Speaker 1 slowly was like,

Speaker 1 it dawned on her face. You could see it.
You could see it happening.

Speaker 1 I took like a corner piece and just took a bite out of it. And it was so fishy and disgusting.
And also like very, it was so over. It was super dry.

Speaker 1 Super overcooked. Like it was, it was rubber.
When Amelia picked it up off the

Speaker 1 container it was in, it was just like this like overwhelming smell of like cat food.

Speaker 1 It was bad. You shouldn't be able to grab a piece of salmon and it come apart in one piece.

Speaker 1 Like I'm not, you know, I'm not eating grade A sashimi every day in my life, but I know you want a little bit of a flake when it comes to the salmon and it just wasn't,

Speaker 1 it wasn't happening, man. And of course, on the taste merit, it fucking sucked as well.

Speaker 1 Bummer all around. I love to hear that they got sashimi over there.
That's nice. Yeah, actually.
That's kind of cool coming from the guy who didn't try it until he was like 41. But yeah, cool.

Speaker 1 I'll take that. That's funny.

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Speaker 4 Let's get to our fork scores in the Denny's Good Fortune menu. So, Jay, if you know the show, we'll each go around.

Speaker 4 We'll each give it our closing arguments and then give this a score from zero to five forks. You are our guest.
We'll begin with you.

Speaker 1 Denny's is something that I know has the unfortunate predicament of being.

Speaker 1 Is there a restaurant that's more of a butt of a joke than Denny's? Maybe Taco Bell in some sense, but it feels like it's risen above it.

Speaker 1 I feel like Captain D's had a time where people were taking shots at that.

Speaker 4 Yeah, the Arby's. That was like more of a 20 years ago, but that's going to come around.
And Arby's is pretty good.

Speaker 1 Arby's is pretty decent. But Denny's is like, man, we're all fucking shitting and pissing on Denny's, right? Sure.
And it's like, it's also very truck stoppy to me.

Speaker 1 I think that's the only time I've had it is like pulling off in the middle of nowhere, Arkansas, and it's like, there's a pit stop and they weirdly have like gambling at the bar or whatever.

Speaker 1 And you go like, I guess I'll have a fucking scramble, man. I don't know.
And it's just, it's a real, it's a real rough spot to be in if you're looking at Denny's.

Speaker 1 And it goes without saying that having it delivered is, well, it's unconscionable. Not ideal.

Speaker 1 It's not where it shines. Yeah.

Speaker 1 So there's not a lot of, there's not a wellspring of affection bubbling up for me from Denny's in the way that Waffle House might or something else.

Speaker 1 Because I like every day, I like all-day breakfast foods. Breakfast fucking kicks ass.

Speaker 1 The menu is very, very grim.

Speaker 1 And uh this was really it we didn't even say the even say the salmon came with the cummiest mashed potatoes i think i've ever seen yes a swamp of of grimy greasy gray gravy yeah that had to be tasted to be believed uh i believe amelia spit that out as well yeah i spit i spit everything out and the broccoli also the broccoli was quite wooden

Speaker 4 It must be said.

Speaker 1 Amelia spit out her salmon and then she went, should I take a picture of this of her spit out salmon in a napkin? And then you did, I believe. Well, you said yes.
I did say yes.

Speaker 1 I'll put it right here in the YouTube episode.

Speaker 1 That's perfect.

Speaker 1 Fries were whatever. Nuggets were at least doing something different.
One of my main things I hate is raising canes because I feel like there's no flavor there.

Speaker 1 There's no attempt at like doing anything.

Speaker 4 They don't season it. They don't season it.

Speaker 1 It's all the sauce. And I fucking, I think that's a disappointment.
That's a huge bummer. Yeah.
That's for a shame on the whole Raising Canes family.

Speaker 1 These nuggets, at least, like it was some kind of seasoning, wasn't it? It was like there was some kind of breading, like they try to do something with the flavor. Yeah.

Speaker 1 But ultimately, it's like, I'd rather have basically,

Speaker 1 this is not my top 25 nuggets, I don't think. Wow.
Wow. I think it's down there with the Italian food of cuisines.
That's for me, which is grim, which is very, very grim.

Speaker 1 The burger was, I bet if you're hungover, the burger actually is not that bad. I'm not hungover, but I don't know.

Speaker 4 That's a surprise.

Speaker 1 That's really interesting to hear.

Speaker 1 So I think the burger would be okay. Yeah.
I think you could do all right there. Maybe get the cinnamon chocolate shake.
Yeah, I just fucking pissed off at Jesse.

Speaker 1 I think you could do okay. If you got the burger, the cinnamon chocolate shake, I think you'd actually have as good a time as you could possibly have at Denny's.
Of course, we didn't have that time.

Speaker 1 We had a really, really bad time eating the food. I would say on the weakness of the salmon alone,

Speaker 1 how could you do any better than half a fork? Half a fork. Wow.
I mean, I don't know. Listen,

Speaker 1 that's good.

Speaker 4 Mitch, what do you think? Your thoughts are your fork score.

Speaker 1 Quigs.

Speaker 1 If

Speaker 1 I hop as Adam Sandler. Oh, okay.
Love this. Denny's

Speaker 1 would be.

Speaker 1 you think it would be a Rob Schneider? Did you think I was going to say Jesse Farrar? Of course not. Okay.
No. I think it would be a Rob Schmidt Shaw.
Because we're friends. Yeah.

Speaker 1 I think it would be a Rob Schneider level restaurant, right? Like,

Speaker 1 Denny's is not as fun. I hop is more fun.
I hop is more fun. We liked the Hobbit menu, though.
That was Denny's.

Speaker 4 That was Denny's back in the day, and then they discontinued it, and they never did it for Battle of the Five Armies.

Speaker 1 I I thought the burger was pretty good. I know you guys didn't like it, and I was just kind of shocked that anything was

Speaker 1 kind of decent. And that fish, which was not a part of the meal.
That's true. It's not a part of the special menu.

Speaker 4 No, it's not part of the Good Fortune.

Speaker 1 Aziz had nothing to do with the salmon. Hold on.
No, he did not. There was.
To be clear, in all fairness to Aziz and sorry, he did not endorse the Atlantic salmon meal.

Speaker 1 No, there was no Good Fortune Atlantic salmon meal. No.
Aniz was very excited about this. I like that movies have tie-ins.
I concur. I think that half of it was not...

Speaker 1 I think the burger at least was something. It was like, you know, like bacon and ranch and grilled onions.
And it was at least something. The nuggets were just kind of nothing.

Speaker 1 You know, there was nothing going on there.

Speaker 1 So as a whole, I don't know. As an asshole.

Speaker 1 As an asshole.

Speaker 1 If you were ever going to do it. This would be a fucking hilarious time to do it.
To show my asshole.

Speaker 4 Are we going to get demonetized on YouTube YouTube if Mitch shows his full asshole?

Speaker 1 Definitely.

Speaker 4 Okay, so maybe don't do that.

Speaker 1 Maybe on a Patreon episode, though, you can do whatever you want. Okay.

Speaker 1 Mitch goes, as a whole, and bends over, throws my asshole, shows the fucking asshole. Just towards

Speaker 1 the two people who were the two women who were. Two younger women, yes.

Speaker 1 Would that be your rating then? Instead of like one fork, you're saying one asshole?

Speaker 1 I'm not giving it asshole score. Oh, Mitch, is that your rating? It's one asshole.

Speaker 1 No, it's not. Put it in in post.

Speaker 1 Are you going to put my asshole in in post? Your asshole's right here, and I'm reacting to it.

Speaker 4 I'll do a reaction to you.

Speaker 1 Just off camera. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Can we just have Mike draw an asshole back at us? Would that get us to the mic?

Speaker 4 Yeah, okay.

Speaker 1 Oh, that's fine.

Speaker 1 Okay, all right. All right.
That's fine. That works.

Speaker 1 I couldn't show right now. I got something brewing, so I don't know.
Okay. Jesus Christ.

Speaker 1 Because of that,

Speaker 1 something might wave a little hello to you if I see that. If I show that right now, Mitch, for fuck's sake, we don't need to hear that shit.
He's talking about a fucking turd coming out of his ass.

Speaker 1 The turd would just wait, it would be in there. It would just be, it would just be saying hello.
It's not ready to leave. Hello, my baby.
Hello, my honey.

Speaker 1 I hate this. Yeah, that's kind of funny.
Emil, you know, you would love the text chain where Dog Bonner just sends us toilet pole shit pictures.

Speaker 1 Yeah, yeah, you need to see, you need to see these guys.

Speaker 1 I like that it exists. Anise,

Speaker 4 I'm happy for you that

Speaker 1 I think this is a dream of Anis's, maybe more so than his brother, to have this menu.

Speaker 1 Right? Wouldn't you say that?

Speaker 1 It's cool.

Speaker 1 Two assholes.

Speaker 1 Okay, man.

Speaker 4 I concur it's a cool. It's a cool collab.

Speaker 1 Is that too high? Yeah.

Speaker 4 It's a cool collab. I think the good Fortune Burger got the job done.
It was right down the middle.

Speaker 4 I thought the chicken nuggies were the budget angle chicken nuggies were absolutely nothing special they were the nuggies almost takes it saying nuggies takes it saying nuggies like below

Speaker 4 shaves a half four yeah dude but i do think that was a competent chain restaurant berg and you know again just like like in terms of the in terms of the i haven't seen the movie yet but

Speaker 4 In terms of the collab, like I just like that it exists. I think it's a fun thing to fun thing to do.
And we see so many of these, but this is not the type of movie that typically does a crossover.

Speaker 4 So I think from this standpoint, the one thing I will say, this is app only, correct? You can only get this delivered. I don't think you can get this in restaurant.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I believe it was delivered.

Speaker 4 Which is a little bit of a, it doesn't affect us, obviously. We got it delivered here.

Speaker 1 The dope boys don't go to the restaurants anymore. What do you want from us?

Speaker 4 I don't know, man.

Speaker 1 Don't make us go to Denny's. I don't want to go.
We're doing our best.

Speaker 4 That said, I do like going to Denny's. I have a lot of fond memories for Denny's over the years I spent.

Speaker 1 What's that? We should have gone. Yeah, we should have gone.

Speaker 4 Denny, no, I mean, I don't need to go back to a Denny's for this. No, no, no, that's true.

Speaker 1 We could have gotten the shirt if we went.

Speaker 4 We could have gotten the shirt if we went.

Speaker 1 Do you want to go now? So the shirts are in person, but not the meal?

Speaker 4 The shirts must be app only, too, right?

Speaker 1 We didn't see them. We should see them anywhere.

Speaker 4 That would be insane if the shirts were in person only.

Speaker 4 But you have, but you can only get the meal delivered.

Speaker 1 Anyway. You can only get the meal delivered.

Speaker 4 Yes, that's part of the time.

Speaker 1 It's bizarre that there was. I didn't see anything on the app about shirts.

Speaker 1 But that's it. That's all I got to say about it.

Speaker 4 Yeah, it is weird that it wasn't nothing in the Denny's app about shirts.

Speaker 1 Yeah, that is weird. Yeah, why doesn't the Denny's app add shirts? They should have more shirts.

Speaker 1 In all fairness, there's probably a standalone Denny's shirts app. Yeah,

Speaker 1 that's probably true. You know how they do that sometimes? Yeah, Amelia, you should have downloaded the Denny's shirts app.

Speaker 1 Another fuck-up.

Speaker 4 I think these were

Speaker 4 really,

Speaker 4 I mean,

Speaker 4 again, down the middle, Nuggets

Speaker 4 didn't impress. Burger was fine.
I like that the Colab exists. It's a little weird that it's app only.

Speaker 4 And

Speaker 4 I think if we take all these factors together, I think where I ultimately land is two forks, two tines, which I think is a fine score for this.

Speaker 1 Higher than me. Yeah.

Speaker 1 It's all love to the Ansaris. Like, it's, you know, it's like, but

Speaker 1 it wasn't it. It wasn't it.
When we do our thing,

Speaker 1 when you're, when you become

Speaker 1 when you become the Adam Sandler and you do

Speaker 1 your thing.

Speaker 1 It's not going to happen anymore. It's over.
You're doing great. You're throwing up.
You know what?

Speaker 1 You know what should happen? He should get a Predator One hat, and then you guys can be together. I like that.
That's fun. It just says, it just says Predator-One.
Like thing one, Predator Dash.

Speaker 1 Thing one and thing two. Right, right, right.
Hey, it's not everybody. He's got kids.
You know, things. I know.
And they spill too.

Speaker 1 Ah, oh, boy.

Speaker 1 Flagger. The thing, the thing spill.
Okay, I got you. I got it.
They spill now?

Speaker 4 They spill now. Come on.
I got some chips and we're going to eat them all. It's another edition of Chips and Hail Rescue Rangers.

Speaker 2 There's no bag too big, no bag too small. When you've got chips, just call.

Speaker 4 Chip, chip, chip, chips, inhale. Rescue Rangers.
Chip-chip-chip, chips, inhale.

Speaker 1 Every flavor. You know it never fails when we're involved.
Somehow, these chips will eat them all.

Speaker 4 Okay, so these are the new Lay's Limited Edition Back to Football flavor bundle, which consists of hot sauce, wavy-loaded nachos, and kettle-cooked cheesy buffalo dip.

Speaker 1 Well done. Thanks, buddy.
Mitt's got a lot of accolades for the whistle. It feels like you need to get your flowers for the song.
Oh, yeah, yeah. It's a good song.
You did it a great day.

Speaker 1 Standby.

Speaker 1 I couldn't tell if you

Speaker 1 left your body at some point during that.

Speaker 4 That was about an hour ago.

Speaker 1 Yeah, yeah, yeah. Sure, sure, sure, sure.

Speaker 4 Okay, so we've got the Lay's wavy loaded nachos, the Lays hot sauce, and the cheesy buffalo dip. Let's open these bad boys and just.

Speaker 1 This is interesting. I'm not excited about any of these, I guess I could say.
What would it take for Lays to get you excited? I don't think there's a fucking thing they could do. That's not true.

Speaker 1 You like regular Lay's stuff, don't you? You're having the boys over for the big game. Salt and vinegar Lays, the best salt and vinegar chip.
Obviously, the game's on.

Speaker 1 You're not checking your phone because somebody might text you about the game that you guys, the fan of your, you know, it is anyways. You're not going to look at your phone during the game.

Speaker 1 And you got the guys over. Yeah.
You're throwing out the lays chips and they're saying, yum, thanks, Mitch.

Speaker 4 Thanks, Mitch.

Speaker 1 Hey, Mitch got chips. Cool.
Yum, yum, give me some. That's insane.

Speaker 1 I think that if I were to have a big game, if it was the big game and I had these kettle-cooked cheesy buffalo dip, people would be like, no, I want to try those. I want to check these out.

Speaker 1 I think they would. Those are untouched by the end of the night.
That's up there with the veggie tray. Wouldn't you rather have like actual cheesy buffalo dip at your

Speaker 4 napkin?

Speaker 1 Yeah, but this is Mitch we're talking about here. He's an animal.
And but here's the deal: I do make a buffalo dip. Why, because you know this.
That's true.

Speaker 1 Oh,

Speaker 1 you know what?

Speaker 1 look i like ruffles i mean ruffles over ruffles over flats right yeah

Speaker 1 i mean look those aren't

Speaker 1 what did you start with you're having the you're because i already had the wavy loaded knock i started with the cheesy buffalo dip all right i'll have some of that i don't like buffalo chips normally

Speaker 1 well and this has a little cheesy taste to it i'm not sure i want the cheese with the buffalo

Speaker 1 those still like two separate things

Speaker 1 it's giving a little buffalo chicken pizza vibe yeah

Speaker 1 where it all it already kind of tastes throw-upy

Speaker 1 oh that's i'm so i'm really sorry

Speaker 1 but doesn't it kind of taste a little throw-upy a little puky you know tastes a little puky the loaded nachos is like i mean forget about it that's just ruffles ruffles is better but man One issue with the loaded nachos is it's kind of got this lettuce, this fake lettucey taste, which I don't love.

Speaker 4 I don't know why they're trying to add that component to it.

Speaker 1 Loaded Loaded nachos feels like too many flavors to try to put on a chip. Ugapachka, you can buy these about.

Speaker 4 Yeah, I don't love those. I thought the cheese buffalo dip was okay.
I did like a little bit of a burn from the loaded nachos. It was subtle, but it had something to it.

Speaker 1 This the Frank's Red Hot is something. Did you have this?

Speaker 4 I haven't tried the hot sauce yet. I'm a bit of a heat seeker, so I'm excited to give these a go.

Speaker 1 My man,

Speaker 1 plus, you can win an epic experience there, it says. So that's cool.

Speaker 1 That's cool. That's really shabby.
That's some of my favorite type of experiences to have. Epic.
Yeah, me too.

Speaker 1 Okay. I would not.
Is Frank's Red Hot one of your. I mean, obviously for Wings, but like other than that,

Speaker 1 do you fuck with Franks? I'll fuck with Franks, yeah. Hashtag fuck with Franks.
Hashtag fuck with Franks.

Speaker 4 The thing is, like, I'm gonna honest with you.

Speaker 1 They're all bad. They're all bad.
They're honestly all kind of whack.

Speaker 1 Lays is in the toilet, man.

Speaker 4 Yeah, but I think the hot sauce is the best varietal, but all these are a little bit of a bad.

Speaker 1 Best of a bad bunch. Yeah.
I would toss the loaded nachos and the cheesy buffalo dip in the garbage and not feel too bad about it. Here's what I don't like.
Look at this.

Speaker 1 Net Net weight's eight ounces on that, seven and a half on this on the wavy. Oh, boy.
What are they doing to it?

Speaker 1 Don't think I don't know what you're fucking doing with the $4.99 print on the side, too.

Speaker 1 I maybe like the cheesy buffalo dip the best. Yeah, I've had a few of these and I don't know.
Well, because you're a mild guy. You're a mild child.

Speaker 1 I don't think they're spicy.

Speaker 1 Is he or is he not a mild child?

Speaker 4 No, I'd say he's a bit of a mild child. Yeah.

Speaker 1 I'm not a mild child. I could outspice either of you.
Where he'd outspice me? Come on. Yes.
I don't think you could outspice me.

Speaker 1 I 100 could outspice you all right we gotta we gotta talent you want to do the spice off

Speaker 1 we gotta do spice off i'll do i'll i'll do the spice off yeah i actually i don't want to hurt myself but i will i you know but you wouldn't have to bro you wouldn't have to to outclass this fool well the thing is mitch is very competitive so i could see him really going for it so are you motherfucker i'm not that competitive

Speaker 1 I can eat spice. Okay, I believe you.
This is some bullshit this motherfucker said.

Speaker 4 Mitch, you would win the spice off.

Speaker 1 I can see it. Oh, that's the worst.
He fucking sees right through you. Yeah, you would win.
You know, I would. I mean, I would.
You're right. Am I involved in it? No, you're nowhere to be found.

Speaker 1 Does anyone? That's what you fucking want, too. Yeah.

Speaker 1 I'll tell you that right now. You fucking want that.
Yeah, I don't want you. I don't know.
If you want a snowball's chance in hell, you have to be here.

Speaker 1 I'm just saying, if you want a chance, I can't be anywhere near the spice off. Oh, I would destroy you in a spice.

Speaker 4 Does anyone want to defend any of these flavors?

Speaker 1 I think straight-up hot sauce is a good flavor for a chip. Yes.
Is Frank's the one that I'm like most excited about? Probably not, but it's decent. You know, I just think Lay's is a chip.

Speaker 1 I'm just over it.

Speaker 4 I'd do a tapatillo or a cholula over this. And they have that, I think.
They have that. Yeah, they have versions like that.

Speaker 1 That's more fun.

Speaker 4 Like, a sriracha is very played out, but even that is more interesting than Frank's.

Speaker 1 Sriracha would be better.

Speaker 1 Korean hot sauce. Oh, yeah, sure.
You know, anything.

Speaker 4 But that is the best of them is the just hot sauce Lays because it's just like simple. It's straightforward.

Speaker 1 It's not over, you know, overdone. It's so spicy.
I can barely. It's fucking bullshit.
I like spicy. What are you talking about?

Speaker 4 What are you doing?

Speaker 1 He was going to be popping. He's going to feel it tomorrow, too.
You already fucking know. I said they had the spicy chips.
He's going to say, you know.

Speaker 4 Can we bring Mitch's asshole up again?

Speaker 1 That's what I fucking got to say. But just make it a red asterisk.
So red right now.

Speaker 1 Your asshole is red right now, is it not? You're a bright red asshole.

Speaker 1 I have a bright red asshole. You have a bright red asshole because of the spicy chips.

Speaker 1 That's true.

Speaker 4 Emma called your bluff.

Speaker 1 Jesse, it was so nice to have you on your last dough, boys.

Speaker 4 Those chips and AL Rescue Rangers, just like a restaurant buyer feedback. Let's open the feedback.

Speaker 1 Today's email is from Jennifer from Ohio, Totoro, on the Discord. Hi, Totoro.
Totoro, right? Hi, Toro.

Speaker 4 Hi, Nick, Mitch, Emma, Amelia, and Jemmy. Hope you all are doing well.
I appreciate the open discussion about mental health, and I hope you all know how much we appreciate you.

Speaker 4 Question: What do you think is the most useful appliance or cooking tool? What is the most useless? Ridiculous. Thanks for giving so much of your time and lives to this podcast.

Speaker 4 Wow. Most useful appliance or cooking? Because they're kind of two two different things.

Speaker 1 Cooking tool and appliance are different things.

Speaker 4 Dude, very, but I will say.

Speaker 1 Fork.

Speaker 1 Fork?

Speaker 4 Man, you are feeling it.

Speaker 1 He's trying to. Do you remember how hot? Is everybody like that? No,

Speaker 1 it's not hot. I burp.

Speaker 1 You burp when you have spice.

Speaker 4 You had like three hot sauce.

Speaker 1 You're a spicy motherfucker. If you were a real heat seeker, you would know that when you're having very hot spice, you do burp, but it just stimulates the esophageal reflex.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 With this mild ass.

Speaker 1 Oh, you choose, you're loving this, huh?

Speaker 4 Got him. Fucking got him.
Put him on poster.

Speaker 1 You got your hot chicken in Tennessee. Is that what you think?

Speaker 1 I would fucking destroy you. I would destroy you in a spice challenge.

Speaker 4 This feels like a YKS. I'm sorry, a go-off, Kings.
This feels like a live stream event. Let's do the spice off.

Speaker 1 We did the hot ones challenge, and I did not take a sip of water the entire time or milk. Yeah.

Speaker 4 you did that's true so what so i won't spice off in a way all right fine you won the spice off in the past when we did the the hot ones by the way the one the hot ones challenge not when we were on their show but when we bought it out of pocket and did it on our own podcast

Speaker 1 someone gave it to us oh someone gave it to us tony charlene that's right you're right it's tony charlin here that was very nice at tony charlin ramos i won't i can't get on hot ones i'm not jack black or adam sams you'll get there has jack black been on it oh wow i should watch

Speaker 1 I mean, you know what? I would love to introduce you to Jack Black so he could kick the shit out of you.

Speaker 4 Um, I hear

Speaker 1 man.

Speaker 4 Here's a low-key useful appliance.

Speaker 1 Squeaky-doo-doo.

Speaker 1 Go ahead. Pretty good.
Start. No, you're, you're all right.

Speaker 4 Go ahead. Low-key, useful appliance.

Speaker 1 That uh tea kettle, that hot water bottle, electric water water. Kettle.

Speaker 4 You put that motherfucker on there. You can get yourself boiling water at any time you want.
Really, really.

Speaker 1 So you scoff at fork.

Speaker 1 What

Speaker 1 you scoffed at fork. Well, fork is just like, I think you're, it's kind of as a cooking tool.

Speaker 4 What I guess you're maybe whipping up some scrambled eggs with fire.

Speaker 1 I am the spoon man. Right.

Speaker 1 Fire is huge. Fire is actually pretty big.
Low-key. Yeah, I disagree with Frankenstein on fire.
I think fire is good. That's the one thing you disagree with him on.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 Throw your ass in the fucking lake. Gonna need a couple more Frankensteins to throw you.

Speaker 1 Be careful. Be careful.
Gets pretty spicy up in that tower, my man.

Speaker 1 He's ripping out his old esophagus and putting a new one in because he had a fucking spicy chip he couldn't make.

Speaker 1 The kettle is a really good call.

Speaker 1 Are we kind of over the oven?

Speaker 4 Well,

Speaker 1 I guess we're talking appliance. I think we're over the oven.
Are we kind of over the oven? I think we're over the oven. The oven is aver, I think, at this point.

Speaker 4 Is range better than oven? I think so. I think so, too.
You definitely need the range over the oven. Now, is microwave?

Speaker 1 Nucre, the nucre.

Speaker 4 Is microwave better than oven in this day and age? It might be, even though the oven has certainly is, it's, if you're a baker, the oven is absolutely essential.

Speaker 4 And for certain dishes, the oven is great. But like,

Speaker 4 you might, if you, if things you need, I think if I was like

Speaker 4 in a bachelor apartment, I think, I think range plus microwave would be the common bachelor apartment.

Speaker 1 What about fridge?

Speaker 4 Fridge, I mean, fridge is number one.

Speaker 1 Fridge is number one with a bullet.

Speaker 4 So it's just like, how do you, like, what's, what's, what's after fridge?

Speaker 1 Is that a cooking appliance? I guess not, right?

Speaker 1 Because you got mad.

Speaker 4 No, I would not call the fridge a cooking appliance.

Speaker 1 The way things are going. Yeah.

Speaker 4 Wow.

Speaker 1 The way things are going. The way things are going.
The fridge might be a cooking appliance. The fridge might end up being a cooking appliance.
Yeah, the fridge.

Speaker 1 Select hot dog. And now it's like, well, here it comes.

Speaker 1 It's a hole to do.

Speaker 4 Fucking hot dog comes out.

Speaker 1 Bitch has got his mouth open at the end of the fridge, waiting for it to pop in there, you know? Yeah. Oh, great.
I got to update my fridge. Right.
That's going to happen. That's the way it is going.

Speaker 4 Oh, no, I bricked my fridge.

Speaker 4 I can't get anything out of there.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 Yeah. Yeah.
Yeah. No, that's what's going to happen.
That is what's going to happen. That's what's going to happen.
That will happen.

Speaker 1 Bricked my fridge.

Speaker 4 I bricked my fridge.

Speaker 4 People will be saying that in a few years.

Speaker 1 Well, then the movie, Honey, I Bricked the Fridge.

Speaker 4 Yeah, because I mean, that's coming to theater soon.

Speaker 1 I mean, but probably before you know it. Maybe by the time this comes out.

Speaker 4 Honestly, probably you're watching

Speaker 1 the movie Honey, I Bricked the Fridge.

Speaker 1 Well, then the spin-off is, of course, Predator versus Fridge.

Speaker 1 That'll happen. I think that will probably happen.
He's got the three dots and it's on the ice thing to get ice out of the fucking.

Speaker 1 Look, I liked all this fridge breaking the fridge talk. Of course,

Speaker 1 we do need to get back to the email at hand here. Kitchen appliance or cook.
The most useful kitchen appliance. So fork, that's why you're laughing about fork.
No one laughed at you.

Speaker 1 I'm going to say the most useful kitchen. I mean, microwave might be up there just because, man, it is huge, right? Yeah.
It's a big one. I mean, big one.
Oven still wins for me.

Speaker 1 I think it's still oven. I still think it's oven.
It's probably oven over microwave. It just feels classier.
Sure. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Sink?

Speaker 1 I mean, look. Wow.

Speaker 4 You kind of need that sink.

Speaker 1 You kind of need the sink.

Speaker 1 Damn, you need the sink. Again, that's a cook.
You're going to count that as a cookie. But it was also.

Speaker 4 Well, it's appliance. Appliance slash cooking tool.

Speaker 1 Yeah.

Speaker 1 The fridge does win.

Speaker 4 And fridge does win. Fridge wins.

Speaker 1 I'm going to throw one that's going to go way to the top of your list. Toaster.

Speaker 4 Toaster's pretty good. Yeah, but I could live without a toaster.
I'm good without a toaster. Really?

Speaker 4 Yeah, there's, there's, I mean, you could work around not having a toaster, you can't really work around not having toaster.

Speaker 1 I don't need to

Speaker 1 say, I don't, I haven't had a toaster or a microwave in like a decade. I could just do everything in the oven.

Speaker 4 Here's an here's the thing

Speaker 1 I'll full out, I'll throw out there as a cooking tool.

Speaker 4 Yeah, uh, nice chef's knife, pretty essential.

Speaker 1 Okay, cutting board. Now I am getting mad that you scoffed at me.
But, but, knife is a good, well, chef's, you need a knife for a cooking tool. I'm sorry.
All right, so my bad is chef's fork.

Speaker 1 How's that?

Speaker 4 No, it still loses.

Speaker 1 What do you think? Like a big barbecue fork? That's not going to do anything. That's what he uses.

Speaker 1 Sitting down right there in his

Speaker 1 big fucking high chair, and he's got the big knife and the big fork, and he's just sawing along the roast beast.

Speaker 1 I wish I could go back in time to August to say no to having you on in fucking November. I understand.

Speaker 4 There's also like a,

Speaker 4 I think there's a good case for spatula.

Speaker 4 Like, especially get one of those utilitarian spatulas, kind of like the, the, you know, the, the, the, the, it's got the spatula.

Speaker 1 Yeah, I like those ones. And then maybe even the one where it kind of can rest on the.

Speaker 4 Yeah, those are fun.

Speaker 1 That's a lot of fun. Man, that's a hoot.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 Least, but now we got to say the least one. Least.
Least, least.

Speaker 1 One of the ones that I got that I, every time I look at it, I go like,

Speaker 1 is one of those, um, I guess it's like a frother.

Speaker 4 Yeah, sure.

Speaker 1 You know, you stir, you use it to stir a protein powder or like an energy thing or whatever. I guess it's ostensibly for like lattes.
Yeah, I don't need a frother. This fucking sucks.

Speaker 4 You got some, some piss that's been sitting out. You can froth it right back up.
Right, you know.

Speaker 1 my buddy greg

Speaker 1 sitting out definitely you gotta froth it back up my buddy greg has a theory that you know you know when you leave a cup of water out overnight and you drink it the next morning and it tastes weird yeah it's because a gnome comes and puts its finger in it wow it kind of has that it kind of has that gnomey flavor to it there's a lot of connections to our our earlier episode we were saying people heard that behind the pay the paywall last week that santa if if if santa could touch your soup he'd make it the perfect temperature he could cool it down i agree with that that's just just part of it for him.

Speaker 1 I think that it thank you, actually. The only reason we don't know for sure is because we're so focused on the cookies and the milk that we don't do the soup.
Yeah, yes.

Speaker 1 You start doing the soup and things start changing around here. Yeah.
Don't you think Santa's a little tired of the cookies and the milk? Okay. Let's give him a meatball sub, eh?

Speaker 4 Are you getting Sebastian Man Escalco?

Speaker 1 Yeah, yeah. Pretty good.
Did this play in Riyadh when you did it like that?

Speaker 1 Did that hit for them at all? I changed it to

Speaker 1 what their holiday is. You change it to their holiday and their food, and we'll stop there.

Speaker 1 Perfect.

Speaker 4 I'm trying to think of like useless thing. I mean, like, I kind of feel like a.
Mitch's dick. Mitch's dick.

Speaker 1 I kind of feel like. Kitchen appliance? That's where it gets out the most.
I feel like. I'm going to take my dick out in the kitchen.

Speaker 1 You already know.

Speaker 4 A melon baller is very situational.

Speaker 4 Like, it's just like, yeah, you end up with one of those in your drawer of junk, and you're kind of like, what am I going to ever use this fucking thing?

Speaker 1 Because aren't you probably, if you really need it, you can use the ice cream scooper? Yeah, exactly.

Speaker 1 exactly there's there's always something else you could figure like it's so use ice cream scooper or melon ball scoop you fucking idiot that's a gigantic what type of melon it's a little disproportionate but i get what you're saying like it's just it's i get what he's saying i don't get what he's saying he's a dumbass we're talking about the fucking apocalypse and you need to scoop your melon you're saying well i got an ice cream scoop

Speaker 1 i guess i'll just fucking kill myself instead what are you talking you can use an ice cream scoop a melon scooper and a frother you don't need them you don't you you don't you don't need them ice cream scooper a little more handy i would say that speaks more to your.

Speaker 1 Oh, yeah, because I'm a big fat guy eating ice cream. I'm scooping it out.

Speaker 1 The fruit thing, no, the ice cream can stay. Yeah, we got it.

Speaker 1 Hold on now. Hold on now.
I got more stuff to say. Please.
Go for it. Apple peeler.
God.

Speaker 4 Apple peeler, I think. I don't know.
I mean, I use it.

Speaker 1 I'll peel an apple. I use it.
Is that the same peeler you use to peel carrots and stuff? Yeah, because you peel a lot of carrots. Like a potato?

Speaker 4 Just a peeler has a lot of

Speaker 4 stuff.

Speaker 1 Mitch just texted me, what's a carrot? That's the first time I heard from him in weeks.

Speaker 4 If you have a question or comment about the world of changes,

Speaker 1 we're done. I don't know.

Speaker 4 Do you have more pitches?

Speaker 1 I got one for. This is a 21st century one.
I don't need the little ties, the little baggy ties. I don't need them.
Baggy ties? Baggy ties. Twist ties.
Don't even need twist ties.

Speaker 4 I don't need the twist ties.

Speaker 1 I'm not sure I know what the twist ties. A twist tie? Like a bread twist? Yeah, a twist tie.

Speaker 1 Is that a cooking tool or an appliance?

Speaker 4 I feel like you're just talking about a thing that's in the kitchen.

Speaker 1 I don't need crumbs on the floor.

Speaker 1 Well, that's true. Yeah.

Speaker 1 Nick, I think you're right. Yeah, okay.
So crumbs on the floor takes it for most uses. All right, you know what?

Speaker 1 I don't need a bread vacuum. How's that? Is that good for an appliance? What the fuck is going on?

Speaker 1 That's an appliance you don't need in the kitchen. That's true.

Speaker 1 You said, I don't want crumbs on the floor. I'm saying I don't want a specific bread vacuum.

Speaker 4 We do have a bread box, which is nice.

Speaker 1 I think that also is an appliance you don't really need. A bread bread box?

Speaker 4 How dare you?

Speaker 1 You don't need a bread box. You don't need it.

Speaker 4 No, you absolutely can survive without a bread box, but it is nice to have.

Speaker 1 The bread vacuum is Mitch's regular vacuum.

Speaker 1 You know what you don't nearly need? You don't really need a butter dish. What about the butter bell?

Speaker 4 I love a butter dish.

Speaker 1 I mean, you can just put the butter out on a plate. You don't really need the dishes.

Speaker 4 Yeah, but the dish is nice.

Speaker 1 What? You don't need the cover for it.

Speaker 4 I like the cover. It's nice.
It's also like a, like, it looks cool.

Speaker 1 Aren't your cats going to suck on it? Yeah, aren't your cats going to fucking deep throat it?

Speaker 1 They don't really do. They don't really touch the aren't your cats gonna bounce and moan on it what the are we talking about

Speaker 1 there's a couple more there are a few more things in there that in your kitchen specifically yeah

Speaker 4 yeah okay there's a few more if you have a question or comment about the world of chain restaurants you can email us at feedback at birdfuck.com or leave us a voicemail at 830 go to that's 830 463684 our producer is 44 our producer is emma erdbrink our associate producer amelia marino our video editor mike dorfben doughboys apparel at kinshipgoods.com slash doughboys and the doughboys double a weekly bonus episode plus our entire pre-2018 back catalog at patreon.com/slash Doughboys.

Speaker 4 Jesse Farrar, JF, thanks so much for joining us.

Speaker 1 JF, have you ever been to any of my houses before? Did you go to Palmerston? I did not go to Palmerston. I could.
I drove by and honked.

Speaker 1 Well, there was a time at your new place, I was skulking around in the backyard, but I don't know if you saw it.

Speaker 1 Nick and Mitch, Amelia, and Emma, thank you so much for having me. I love being here.

Speaker 1 You guys are great. I listen all the time, and I'm happy to be a part of

Speaker 1 the Dough Boys universe universe in some very small way. Wow.
We're so happy to have you on like once a year or so. It's really cool to have you here.

Speaker 1 You know, like it's it's great to see you. It's really good to see you too.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 And I'm really happy for you that when we came

Speaker 1 to Tennessee that it was like one of the best moments of your life. I tell my kids about it.

Speaker 1 We love having you here.

Speaker 1 It's a lot of fun. Well, I'll come back anytime.
Hell yeah.

Speaker 1 And maybe for Faruch, we'll get you guys to watch

Speaker 1 like that Muppet movie where they come all over the doors or whatever.

Speaker 1 I think that one's really funny.

Speaker 1 Are yours messed up movies? They're not messed up. They're just shit that I like.
It's like dad, like dad cinema, basically. Okay.
Okay.

Speaker 1 So, you know, there's something in there for everybody, even though everyone hates it. Yeah.

Speaker 4 YKS, a podcast I listen to basically every episode. Great show.
And twitch.tv/slash, what's the go off kings URL?

Speaker 1 It is just go off kings.

Speaker 4 Twitch.tv slash go off kings to check it. Check y'all out on Twitch.

Speaker 4 JF and DB over on YKS, JF and Steven Heck over on the Go Off Kings.

Speaker 1 My wonderful friends, maybe next time I'll bring all the boys in here.

Speaker 4 Can you imagine

Speaker 4 a peep this out, boys, mega mix?

Speaker 1 He has said before that two is the limit. He really has said this.

Speaker 4 We could do, we could swing three games.

Speaker 1 Oh, okay. We're changing it.

Speaker 4 We could do three games.

Speaker 1 It's going to be the most chaotic episode we've ever gotten. Yeah.
Listeners, does that sound good at all to you guys?

Speaker 1 Yeah. I think we're going to have a lot of fun.
Jesse, you know what? We battled a lot in this episode, as we always do, but stick around for some ice cream.

Speaker 1 Come over next door with me to salt and straw. I can't wait.
Thank you so much. Of course.

Speaker 1 We get the spicy one for him.

Speaker 4 That'll do it for some of the doughboys. Until next time at the Spoon Map Mitchell.

Speaker 1 I'm Tiger Reggie. Happy Eating.
See ya.

Speaker 11 What's going on? It's Lamorne Morris.

Speaker 12 And Hannah Simone.

Speaker 13 And we host The Mess Around, a New Girl Rewatch podcast now on Headgum.

Speaker 11 Now, here's the thing. Every single week, we chat about an episode of New Girl, and we really get into it.

Speaker 13 Like we get up in there. We get up in there.

Speaker 11 You know, we reminisce about our times on set.

Speaker 13 We share behind the scenes tea. We react to re-watching episodes that we haven't seen in years.
We talk about how Jake Johnson is dog f ⁇ ing.

Speaker 12 That's not true. We talk about so many memories we have of working with the biggest stars on the planet.
I'm talking Prince, Taylor Swift, Olivia Rodrigo.

Speaker 13 We're just two BFFs having a good old time, okay? Sometimes we even talk to other co-stars like Zoe Deschanel, Jake Johnson, Max Greenfield, and Damon Waynes Jr.

Speaker 13 And your dad, we talked to your dad on this show as well.

Speaker 12 Make sure you subscribe to the mess around wherever you get your podcasts. New episodes drop every single Tuesday.

Speaker 1 That was a hit gum podcast.